Based Camp - January 15, 2024


Every Man (Sexually) is Simultaneously Raider & Homesteader


Episode Stats

Length

34 minutes

Words per Minute

180.86102

Word Count

6,310

Sentence Count

339

Misogynist Sentences

42

Hate Speech Sentences

31


Summary

In this episode, we talk about the dual sexual strategy hypothesis, the idea that humans can have multiple sexual strategies pre-programmed into them that exist alongside each other, and how this could explain why women are attracted to a lot of people.


Transcript

00:00:00.000 There are two major sexual events or strategies that a male can undertake that can overlap
00:00:06.140 and both be successful within the same individual.
00:00:08.200 And what this means is that there was likely a push for both strategies to develop within
00:00:14.960 men simultaneously.
00:00:16.640 And this leads to my hypothesis that the average man has a raider sexuality and a homesteader
00:00:26.560 sexuality.
00:00:27.200 And so the things that turn them on most when they do with their long-term partner may
00:00:34.740 be actually entirely divorced from the things that turn them on most when what would activate
00:00:41.120 our raider sexuality most within the modern world would be pornography.
00:00:44.700 These are women that you have no emotional connection to, you see as entirely disposable.
00:00:49.280 This can cause a lot of problems if a man, when he is young, when he's learning what
00:00:54.740 his sexuality is, he begins to think that his sexuality is only comprised of the type of
00:01:00.840 pornography that he's consuming.
00:01:02.820 Yeah.
00:01:03.280 If you can genuinely convince a woman's body that she's sleeping with a bunch of different
00:01:07.240 people through this sort of role play, you might be actually triggering the same biological
00:01:12.680 change that happens with her actually sleeping with a lot of people.
00:01:15.660 Would you like to know more?
00:01:17.920 It requires some major mental caliber, which only, only men have.
00:01:23.400 Simone was pointing out that some of our audience doesn't like when we're on the wrong side.
00:01:27.140 I see the comments.
00:01:28.560 I hear you people.
00:01:29.840 And I made sure that we...
00:01:31.480 This is the problem with attracting a disproportionately autistic audience.
00:01:35.320 Is they get annoyed when we're on the wrong side.
00:01:39.540 Well, you know what?
00:01:40.780 They're right to be annoyed.
00:01:42.460 But I want to talk about a concept that we have developed since writing The Pragmatist
00:01:46.260 Guide to Sexuality.
00:01:47.220 So of all of our theories of human sexuality, this is actually not in the book.
00:01:51.520 And we haven't done a test on this yet.
00:01:53.640 When I am done with important projects I'm working on now, I may one day run a test on
00:01:57.660 it.
00:01:57.820 Or when we have Ayla next on, because we're booking that now, I may try to compel her to include
00:02:03.500 this in one of her future studies.
00:02:04.880 But it is a concept that I think is really worth discussing on the channel in detail in
00:02:11.540 sort of a dedicated episode as the, what do we call it?
00:02:14.220 The dual sexual strategy hypothesis.
00:02:16.720 Okay, that's a good word for it.
00:02:19.040 To say that humans can have multiple sexual strategies pre-programmed into them that exist
00:02:26.640 alongside each other.
00:02:28.640 So one iteration of this that we do argue for in The Pragmatist Guide to Sexuality is
00:02:33.780 is how this works in women.
00:02:35.880 So in women, we argue that when a woman goes out there and sleeps with a ton of people,
00:02:41.980 her body undergoes something called a polymorphic change.
00:02:45.440 So polymorphic changes happen in animals.
00:02:48.340 The quintessential example of this is the grasshopper changing into a locus.
00:02:53.420 If you, so in nature, this happens when it's, when it gets over a certain population density,
00:02:57.920 but it can be simulated in a lab by rubbing its hind leg with a Q-tip and it leads to a behavioral
00:03:03.000 change.
00:03:03.500 It starts this swarming behavior.
00:03:04.640 It also changes its color, shape, and size.
00:03:07.720 So pretty big change.
00:03:09.240 But in primates, we see this in baboons.
00:03:11.520 And depending on like the resources that baboons have versus the troop size, they will change
00:03:16.480 their social structure.
00:03:17.860 So I think it's like in resource dense areas versus resource scarce areas, they switch between
00:03:24.020 larger social groups that are matriarchal versus smaller social groups that are patriarchal
00:03:29.020 or some inverse of that.
00:03:30.300 But it's a pretty significant change in how they structure themselves.
00:03:33.780 Well, in humans, a human female specifically, what we argue in the book, and I believe pretty
00:03:38.820 strongly, is that the more a human woman sleeps around, the lower, like there were some studies
00:03:46.620 done on this, the lower amounts of oxytocin she will produce with every first time new sexual
00:03:53.300 partner, meaning that she is less likely to have an automatic bond to that sexual partner,
00:03:59.320 which is very useful in a monogamous society, meaning that they basically automatically fall
00:04:04.040 in love with the first person they have sex with to some small extent.
00:04:07.800 And then to a smaller, you know, the second person, third person, but once they're on like
00:04:10.560 person five, this effect no longer happens at all.
00:04:13.400 And this can have a lot of problems in the dating market when women expect men that they
00:04:17.400 are sleeping with, like on guy 10, to ever be able to recapture the spark they had with
00:04:21.700 their first few romantic partners, which is often just impossible with women.
00:04:26.340 Not always.
00:04:27.180 I mean, obviously, you know, most men are born being attracted to the female body shape,
00:04:32.020 but some men are born being attracted to the male body shape, you know, as in women.
00:04:35.160 Some women don't have this effect happen to them.
00:04:36.940 But I think it happens with the majority of women.
00:04:40.440 And this is actually a very useful thing from a biological context.
00:04:44.280 So it meant that if you were a woman and you were in a monogamous culture, you would be
00:04:49.320 optimized for the monogamous lifestyle.
00:04:51.220 If you were in a culture where you were being passed around, i.e. your village had been raided,
00:04:55.440 or you were an ex-slave of some sort, then you would be biologically optimized for that
00:05:02.580 circumstance.
00:05:03.600 However, this is a trend I've noticed that we didn't mention in the book with the dual
00:05:07.280 female hypothesis.
00:05:08.720 I have noticed that women who sleep around more seem to be more in to what I would call
00:05:15.820 the category of arousal patterns that I call violent submission.
00:05:19.320 This is things like choking, spanking, degradation, stuff like that.
00:05:25.480 Ella must have data on this because I think she tracks body count, plus, of course, things
00:05:29.780 that turn people on.
00:05:31.740 Yeah.
00:05:32.040 So this is something that we could look at to see if there's a correlation there.
00:05:34.580 But I'm fairly certain you're going to end up finding a correlation there with the more
00:05:39.780 partners a woman is sleeping with, the more they are turned on because they are beginning
00:05:45.040 to be optimized, like biologically, for being a slave.
00:05:50.000 That's what they think they are.
00:05:51.840 They think they are an ex-slave that is being passed around some group that has raided and
00:05:56.620 captured her village.
00:05:57.540 This is something that happened very, very frequently in a historical context.
00:06:01.080 So frequently that if you read the Pragmatist Guide to Sexuality, we talk about all the places
00:06:05.500 you see this in behavioral patterns.
00:06:07.140 So you can see it's pretty deeply carved into our DNA.
00:06:11.000 But, Simone, do you want to speak to this at all?
00:06:12.700 No, well, this is all stuff we've talked about before.
00:06:16.380 So I'm more interested in hearing you go over the male side of this, which is not in the
00:06:20.320 Pragmatist Guide to Sexuality, in which you have come up with recently.
00:06:23.640 Well, no, something we haven't talked about before is the hypothesis that women who sleep
00:06:27.260 around more are going to be more turned on by a violent degradation than women who sleep
00:06:32.420 around more.
00:06:32.640 I don't predict that with the same confidence that you do.
00:06:37.440 Good.
00:06:37.720 Next hypothesis is, I was thinking, like, if evolution was going to select for something,
00:06:43.660 there are two major sexual events or strategies that a male can undertake.
00:06:48.880 And it's very important to understand that males can undertake both simultaneously.
00:06:54.460 And historically, the successful males almost always undertook both simultaneously.
00:06:59.600 Okay?
00:06:59.880 So a lot of people see, like, okay, so there's two different strategies.
00:07:04.020 You as a guy can go out and do a bunch of graping as a warrior, like going out and conquering
00:07:10.860 areas.
00:07:11.700 Go a Viking in a historic context or in Rome, like go out with legions, right?
00:07:16.380 And end up impregnating a bunch of people within the areas that you conquer.
00:07:19.820 And that can lead to, you know, famously Genghis Khan, right?
00:07:22.120 Like tons and tons and tons and tons of offspring.
00:07:23.960 But then the other strategy and the often more default, like it's almost sort of like
00:07:29.500 a overlapping K and R selecting strategy.
00:07:32.640 K versus R selecting is, are you investing a lot of time in your offspring?
00:07:35.460 Are you investing a little time in your offspring?
00:07:37.180 Well, the same legionary may have a wife back at home.
00:07:41.660 You know, think about the movie Gladiator or whatever, right?
00:07:43.800 Like he would still have his plot back at home where he had eight kids on the farm and
00:07:48.880 he would be working to help that family.
00:07:51.580 Well, the fact that these two sexual strategies in men can overlap was in the same successful
00:07:57.880 male.
00:07:58.640 And this is true, like going a Viking.
00:08:00.220 Like if I'm going a Viking and I'm out there and I have an impulse, which causes me to impregnate
00:08:05.440 people when I am raiding a village in Northern England, right?
00:08:09.860 I would need a completely different set of impulses to ensure that I both find a high quality
00:08:15.960 partner for who is my stable partner, who's keeping my farm running, who's providing me with
00:08:20.680 food when I get back from a Viking that is taking care of the kids that are going to
00:08:25.000 inherit my family name and everything like that, right?
00:08:27.380 You have two strategies here that can overlap and both be successful within the same individual.
00:08:33.100 And what this means is that there was likely a push for both strategies to develop within
00:08:39.720 men simultaneously.
00:08:41.220 And this leads to my hypothesis that men have, your average man, obviously, you know, as I
00:08:49.820 said, some men are gay.
00:08:50.740 So there's all sorts of like a little weird ways a guy can be programmed.
00:08:54.300 Maybe a guy only has one of these appear in him.
00:08:56.120 But I think that the average man has a raider sexuality and a homesteader sexuality.
00:09:04.640 And so the things that turn them on most when they do with their long-term partner may be
00:09:12.600 actually entirely divorced from the things that turn them on most when what would activate
00:09:18.600 our raider sexuality most within the modern world would be pornography.
00:09:22.180 These are women that you have no emotional connection to, you see as entirely disposable.
00:09:26.280 And it would explain why in pornography, you see such a violent slash hardcore pornography
00:09:34.560 appearing because that pornography is always, or pornography more generally, is always appealing
00:09:43.440 to the raider side of a male sexuality.
00:09:45.700 Interesting.
00:09:46.300 Now, this can cause a lot of problems if a man, when he is young and is not sexually successful
00:09:53.600 because he doesn't get any, you know, long-term partners, he doesn't get any women who he's
00:09:58.580 sleeping with that he respects and a part of his brain sees as homesteader sexuality.
00:10:02.880 So when he's learning what his sexuality is, he begins to think that his sexuality is only
00:10:09.940 comprised of the type of pornography that he's consuming.
00:10:12.520 And this leads to men beginning to personally identify and build into their personal narrative
00:10:20.960 of who they are as a person, this violent sexual raider personality, instead of what they
00:10:29.080 actually are, which is a bifurcation of two sexual personalities with one sexual personality
00:10:35.080 actually being much more optimized for like the good stay-at-home wife that they should
00:10:40.260 be looking for.
00:10:41.500 So they're basically like arbitrarily limiting themselves because they see that the thing X turns
00:10:47.520 them on and they're totally not realizing that thing Y can also be like a major source
00:10:52.540 of satisfaction for them, but because it's not really in the material that they consume
00:10:58.060 freely and easily online, they just assume that that's not for them or they don't even
00:11:03.640 know that it's an option.
00:11:06.100 Yeah.
00:11:07.580 Wow.
00:11:08.780 Yeah.
00:11:09.220 I mean, it's a lot harder to market that kind of fantasy to men.
00:11:14.300 I mean, it's, it's certainly not like immediately satisfying, right?
00:11:16.880 It's a slow burn.
00:11:18.220 It's a, it's a different.
00:11:19.240 Yeah.
00:11:19.560 But I think a lot of men who, when they're younger, find themselves turned on by raider
00:11:23.960 sexuality type stuff might be surprised how gross that stuff would feel doing with their
00:11:30.200 long-term partner.
00:11:31.380 No, it is.
00:11:32.380 It is interesting because I think that they just assume, oh, this is all stuff I would
00:11:36.020 always enjoy doing.
00:11:37.560 And, and then they get it.
00:11:38.980 Well, and so men can high simulate raider sexuality with long-term partners through scene changes.
00:11:45.960 And this is an interesting thing that you see within BDSM and stuff like that.
00:11:49.520 So what's happening there is they are learning to think of their partner as somebody disposable
00:11:55.020 was in the context of a micro scene that disconnects them from who they are.
00:12:00.920 So like, you're no longer my wife.
00:12:03.080 If you're now this victim and I'm, you know, you're now like a nurse, you're now a teacher,
00:12:08.640 you know, whatever, but that would actually be an authority mindset.
00:12:11.200 So that's actually the inverse of what I'm talking about here, but this is role play.
00:12:14.500 Like we are role playing a scenario in which you aren't who you are.
00:12:18.960 And I am not who I am so that we can both carry out something that masturbates this part of
00:12:25.420 our sexuality that is not being fully masturbated was in the normal sort of sexual relationship
00:12:31.460 I would have with somebody I know that I'm married to.
00:12:34.220 Right.
00:12:34.580 Yeah.
00:12:35.320 Because like no, no man would really want to see violent and bad things happen to his
00:12:40.400 wife or like, you know, a coercive scenario take place.
00:12:43.940 I mean, unless he's weird, yeah, but like, but most husbands would be like, no, not my
00:12:50.080 wife, but they may still be turned on by that scenario.
00:12:52.740 So they would need to like relationship.
00:12:56.460 They're like, how do I simulate both of the women who historically I would have been pillaging
00:13:00.800 their village and also simulate the loving relationship I have at home?
00:13:04.540 Well, let's do it with scene changes, set changes and pretend because humans can pretend.
00:13:09.900 Right.
00:13:10.160 Yeah.
00:13:10.420 And they can trigger different aspects of their personality by appearing in very different
00:13:15.000 one, like costumes using different words.
00:13:18.140 Like this is something that you often, you know, we talk about humans having different
00:13:21.160 parts of their personality overlaid on each other that are brought out.
00:13:24.280 Like when I'm at work, one aspect of my personality is out when I'm at home, one aspect of my personality
00:13:28.440 is out.
00:13:29.240 And when people go back to their families, I think they often find a more juvenile aspect
00:13:32.440 of their personality is drawn out, even if they don't intend for it to be because
00:13:36.120 it's the scene and the context of the people that are around reactivates this earlier optimization
00:13:43.060 that they had in life.
00:13:44.260 Well, I think within sexuality, we have different ones as well, and that they can be activated
00:13:48.360 by very specific context.
00:13:50.720 The problem is, is that when people begin to internalize, and this is something we constantly
00:13:56.400 emphasize within the Pragmatist Guide to Sexuality.
00:13:58.800 And it's really important to note is that the things that arbitrarily turn you on are
00:14:03.420 not who you are.
00:14:04.820 Like they are not a reflection of your personality or anything like that.
00:14:08.200 They are random.
00:14:09.120 Or your morality or what you want to have happen or what you endorse.
00:14:11.520 Yeah.
00:14:11.800 Anything.
00:14:12.500 Yeah.
00:14:12.980 A woman who gets turned on by, you know, the sort of.
00:14:16.780 Coercive sex.
00:14:17.900 Yeah.
00:14:18.200 Coercive sex.
00:14:18.880 That doesn't mean that she wants surprise sex, right?
00:14:23.200 Because there is a difference between something turning you on and you wanting it in the real
00:14:27.800 world, there's also a difference between something randomly turning you on and it being an aspect
00:14:32.200 of your identity.
00:14:33.420 Now, I know that this is a horrifying and offensive thing for me to say was in this world of
00:14:41.440 alphabet soup identities, right?
00:14:45.620 That just because something turns you on doesn't mean you need to incorporate it into your identity
00:14:50.740 or you need to act on it.
00:14:52.540 But I think that actually the rise of the alphabet soup mentality has led to many men who may not
00:15:02.540 agree, like they are otherwise normal straight men, to begin to accidentally incorporate a lot
00:15:10.320 of this raider sexuality into their personality because they're not getting laid when they're
00:15:13.880 developing their sexual identity.
00:15:15.360 And so they're seeing all women in this way.
00:15:17.040 By the way, a clip I really wanted to use about the alphabet soup group because I, you
00:15:22.140 know, going extinct because they're not going to be a long term group like the populations
00:15:25.180 that are really, really accepting of them have incredibly low fertility rates.
00:15:29.100 Mr. Marsh, what exactly are you trying to accomplish?
00:15:32.100 We have to take matters into our own hands.
00:15:34.480 We're trying to turn everyone gay so that there are no future humans.
00:15:37.900 Present day America, number one.
00:15:39.780 And it reminds me that like that's basically what many of the antinatalists are doing is a
00:15:44.540 a big gay orgy to prevent humanity or at least their sect of humanity from existing in the
00:15:48.680 future.
00:15:49.600 And that is historically also why many cultures shame these sorts of relationships is it's
00:15:55.300 not that these relationships are intrinsically immoral.
00:15:57.460 And I believe very strongly that like gay relationships are not intrinsically immoral.
00:16:00.760 But I also believe that groups that are accepting of them have lower fertility rates and thus get
00:16:05.900 outcompeted by groups that are not.
00:16:07.620 And that is why pretty much wherever you go, if you're looking at a successful, like long lived
00:16:11.680 widespread cultural group, it's going to have some undertone of homophobia.
00:16:14.540 Because those iterations of cultures outcompete other iterations of cultures intergenerationally.
00:16:19.020 And only within our debauched modern context do you see anything else.
00:16:22.840 But I mean, debauched is succumbing to or identifying with this raider sexuality.
00:16:29.380 Just because something turns you on doesn't mean you need to incorporate it into your identity.
00:16:34.400 It's a good thing.
00:16:35.320 Like you have to think about your morals and your values and what you want for society and
00:16:38.960 yourself and others.
00:16:39.760 And then you need to think about what turns you on and maybe parse those out.
00:16:45.540 Well, I know what I mean.
00:16:46.300 Some men, they may think or women may have such a strong desire to exercise this aspect of
00:16:50.960 their sexuality that was hard-coded in Bose.
00:16:52.660 It makes sense to do Bose within a relationship.
00:16:55.240 To have your BDSM play and your regular sexual relationship or vanilla sexual relationship.
00:17:01.840 That may make sense to overlap, to lower incidence of marital dissatisfaction, which might lower
00:17:09.260 the chance of your wife cheating on you with somebody outside of your relationship because
00:17:12.940 you are taking on Bose roles in this artificial context for them.
00:17:17.700 And that is a really interesting phenomenon that that may be a successful way to structure
00:17:24.000 things for some communities.
00:17:25.200 Why I don't think that that works.
00:17:29.900 Why do you think I don't think that that'll work long-term?
00:17:33.940 Because it's an unsustainable power dynamic?
00:17:37.000 No, because I don't see it in any long-lived cultural group in the world.
00:17:42.040 I am aware of no long-lived religious tradition or long-lived cultural tradition that has a bifurcation
00:17:48.580 of how they treat their partners.
00:17:50.860 And i.e. we have both the homestead relationship and the raider relationship.
00:17:57.240 And the reason I think that you don't see this is because I think that once you begin to treat
00:18:02.060 women in this raider fashion, they are likely going to have the same biological reaction that
00:18:07.160 they have from being passed around between a ton of guys.
00:18:10.500 Okay, so they'll start devaluing the relationship as well.
00:18:16.160 They'll biologically begin to transform.
00:18:18.220 If you can genuinely convince a woman's body that she's sleeping with a bunch of different
00:18:22.640 people through this sort of role play, you might be actually triggering the same biological
00:18:28.080 change that happens with her actually sleeping with a lot of people.
00:18:31.380 It could be, yeah.
00:18:32.080 I mean, people get into, like, really into character.
00:18:34.540 Like, totally.
00:18:35.640 Yeah, wow.
00:18:36.880 I wonder if it could, yeah, trigger the sort of hormonal processes that...
00:18:40.220 So that's why I suspect we don't see this in long-lived cultural groups.
00:18:43.520 But that doesn't mean that it doesn't make sense because in a modern relationship,
00:18:46.460 if you are with a woman who has not, who has, sorry, you're with a woman who has slept
00:18:50.840 around a lot, this might be the only way to maintain her happily was in a long-term monogamous
00:18:57.660 relationship.
00:18:58.920 Oh.
00:19:00.100 Because she has already undergone this polymorphic transformation.
00:19:03.720 And I don't know if there's a way to transform women back once they've undergone it.
00:19:06.800 Okay, but here's the thing, and I think this is important to note, is that relationships are not
00:19:11.100 just sex.
00:19:12.600 Like, true.
00:19:13.480 There's a lot more that's going on.
00:19:15.340 There's economic burden sharing.
00:19:17.700 There's building households.
00:19:19.620 There's raising kids.
00:19:21.060 Yeah, I think a lot of people get married, especially when they're more mature.
00:19:26.360 And, of course, there are many exceptions here.
00:19:28.920 Independent of sex, because they want to do specific things.
00:19:32.440 And there are many, probably totally sexless marriages out there where couples have just
00:19:37.360 come together because they knew that that configuration would help them achieve their
00:19:41.520 lifestyle goals.
00:19:43.740 Well, yeah.
00:19:44.160 I mean, and I think we largely, as a society right now, overvalue sex within marriages.
00:19:48.860 And the reason we overvalue sex within marriages is because when we are thinking about marriage
00:19:54.420 partners within our existing sociotechnological framework, people vet marriage partners through
00:20:01.900 casual sex.
00:20:03.780 And so your quality as a marriage partner is in part seen as your value is in sexual marketplaces.
00:20:11.020 And so people then confuse that as being a core aspect of a marriage.
00:20:16.500 When in reality, I, and I, and I think, you know, we had this video on how girl defined
00:20:21.900 ruined a generation of men.
00:20:23.620 There's a takeoff on the how Scott Pilgrim ruined a generation of men.
00:20:26.440 DVD and ecstasy conceded with no self-esteem.
00:20:32.140 She's a teenage dream.
00:20:33.820 If you hate yourself.
00:20:36.140 The Mona flowers and felt so empowered by a movie made in Hollywood.
00:20:46.180 It's sad to think she's someone's daughter like a lamb to the slaughter.
00:20:51.560 In that they convinced conservatives that the point of marriage was sex, but that the way
00:20:58.900 you got the very best sex and the very goodest of good sex was through abstinence until marriage.
00:21:04.900 When that missed the point, abstinence until marriage was a value because sex is just not
00:21:11.180 that important at all before a marriage or after a marriage.
00:21:14.900 In terms of our own kids, and you can watch our video on how we would, you know, teach
00:21:20.140 our kids about sexuality.
00:21:20.900 I do think that sex can be used as a tool within a modern context to, you know, get followers
00:21:27.060 and help and stuff like that.
00:21:28.180 I mean, who knows how I would have done in college without all the women who helped me
00:21:31.000 with my homework and studying that were primarily doing that because I was having sex with them.
00:21:35.460 Like there, there, there are men and women who use sex as a resource to reach certain
00:21:41.740 goals that they have.
00:21:43.180 It's just better if our kids grow up understanding the costs and the benefits of that.
00:21:47.500 Now, fortunately was been maybe, or at least for me, fortunately now, not always because
00:21:51.840 you know, you could accidentally get a woman pregnant or something like that, but the costs,
00:21:55.320 at least at a long-term psychological level seem to be lower than the costs to women.
00:21:59.460 A really interesting study I was looking at recently was looking at, and I'll put the statistics
00:22:05.860 on screen here, how many sexual partners a woman had had before she got married and the likelihood
00:22:10.160 that the marriage would end a divorce.
00:22:12.320 And a woman who hadn't had any sexual partners, there was only a 20% chance it would end in
00:22:17.660 divorce.
00:22:18.160 And a woman who had had, I think over 15 sexual partners or over 12 sexual partners, there
00:22:23.900 was only a 20% chance the marriage would stay.
00:22:26.760 And this is a huge difference.
00:22:29.980 This is a huge difference.
00:22:31.820 I think most women, like when I think about Ayla's live Twitter polls, so like, you know,
00:22:36.860 we actually had the opportunity to see people sort themselves by number of sexual partners.
00:22:42.340 It seemed like most women in Ayla's live Twitter polls sorted themselves into the three to
00:22:49.240 eight range.
00:22:51.040 So, you know.
00:22:53.160 Yeah.
00:22:53.580 Well, so in the oxytocin studies, that would be pretty much already near the floor of oxytocin
00:22:57.520 you get from new partners.
00:22:58.420 That seems to happen after three.
00:23:00.640 So once you've done three partners, you're pretty much spent on the oxytocin category,
00:23:04.300 but you would still see a decline in the probability that a marriage continues.
00:23:08.420 And I should note these oxytocin studies, I remember very clearly going over them.
00:23:12.140 I remember them being controversial.
00:23:13.320 Like it was talked about them being controversial, but they were there and I went over them.
00:23:17.000 Now, if you look for them online, you won't find them anywhere.
00:23:19.240 And what's funny is all of the old sex researchers remember them.
00:23:22.680 You know, when we're talking with Diana Fleischman, she remembers these studies existing.
00:23:26.840 You can't find them anywhere anymore.
00:23:28.420 I do not know what happened to them.
00:23:29.780 I think even A-Lev will remember them existing at some point.
00:23:32.040 Just gone now.
00:23:32.800 Scrubbed from the internet.
00:23:33.900 Which I think shows the power of the leftist distortion field when something doesn't agree
00:23:39.340 with their narrative or leads to unpleasant implications.
00:23:42.700 It must be destroyed.
00:23:44.820 Which to me is interesting in that it shows that this war that we have is a war of truth
00:23:51.180 and integrity and fighting for what is real and fighting for this society-wide distortion
00:23:58.260 field that is meant to protect the illusion that everyone can live in this happy world.
00:24:04.800 In fact, it reminds me a lot of this book I read growing up called The Giver.
00:24:09.660 I don't know if you read that one, where basically they'd even removed colors from society and
00:24:14.040 they'd removed everything.
00:24:14.960 So you took a drug that made it so you didn't feel emotions, you didn't see colors, you didn't
00:24:18.680 anything like that.
00:24:19.820 Because all of that stuff could lead to potential discomfort in some individuals and the goal
00:24:23.440 of society is to remove all potential discomfort.
00:24:25.600 And we are beginning to see that, this expanding distortion field.
00:24:29.860 But fortunately, we're also seeing them be incredibly low fertility.
00:24:32.740 And so they really can only survive by taking children from nearby healthy demographic groups.
00:24:36.980 So, you know, and then people are like, well, why is all this sex?
00:24:39.460 Why do you look so hard at sex?
00:24:41.160 Like, why is this so important to you to understand, right?
00:24:44.900 Sexuality right now is one of the core ways that the mind virus is utilizing to peel kids
00:24:53.000 out from your healthy demographic groups.
00:24:54.660 If you ignore human sexual diversity or real human sexuality, then you put your group at
00:25:02.140 risk of having kids peeled out of it.
00:25:04.360 If you do stupid things like banning pornography was in a modern context, like, of course, pornography
00:25:09.500 was a good idea to ban in a historic context when, you know, people, the first person they
00:25:15.080 married, what the first person they had sex with was who they married and porn just lowered
00:25:18.740 the amount of sex they were having with their partner, right?
00:25:20.760 Like, yeah, of course that made sense.
00:25:22.400 But if you look within a modern context, there's pretty much a direct correlation geographically
00:25:26.680 with how religious, i.e., how banned porn is in an area and how much porn is consumed.
00:25:31.680 Banning porn has the exact opposite effect at a cultural level that you would expect, which
00:25:36.120 means we need to understand human sexuality to learn how we can adapt our cultures to better
00:25:42.360 prevent sexuality as being a wedge that the left can use or the mind virus can use to take
00:25:50.000 our children from us.
00:25:51.360 And I think being sexually accepting while also being sexually honest, the cool thing
00:25:55.920 about what the left has done is they've created such a distortion field.
00:25:58.820 It's really clear when you talk to people about how human sexuality actually works.
00:26:02.780 And you look at our book, like The Pragmatist Guide to Sexuality, which would be very offensive
00:26:07.640 from a leftist perspective, they are getting a truer understanding of sexuality than the
00:26:11.860 left is selling.
00:26:12.380 Because the left, as we talked about in the beginning of that book, it has to sell this
00:26:15.940 iteration of sexuality where gayness is like a meaningful sexual subtype, right?
00:26:21.680 And we point out that if gayness probably doesn't really meaningfully exist, it's better to think
00:26:26.460 of what specific genital configurations humans are most attracted to, because we point out
00:26:31.780 that it's actually pretty common for straight men to be repulsed by something like vagina.
00:26:35.840 It's actually pretty common for men to be attracted to like a female body shape, like secondary
00:26:42.620 sex characteristics, but male primary sex characteristics, which within the online sphere
00:26:46.700 is known as like Buddha.
00:26:47.980 It's within women, you see similar sort of mismatch between like primary and secondary sex
00:26:52.840 characteristics, first attraction, to the extent where categorizing people into this
00:26:57.920 like holistically, I am attracted to the opposite same category is really only useful in a macro
00:27:02.500 behavioral pattern perspective, i.e.
00:27:04.780 who are they dating, which is useful.
00:27:07.160 Well, almost even more relevant from a cultural standpoint, really.
00:27:10.920 Yeah, they're groups that built an identity because they were communicated from society for a
00:27:17.060 similar rule violation, but this led for something like gay people to be in the same community as
00:27:24.120 trans people, when in reality, they have almost nothing in common in that they, other than that
00:27:29.300 they were both isolated from mainstream society for violating sexual norms or gender norms.
00:27:34.440 And it really makes no sense for these two communities to be allies at all, other than for a while,
00:27:40.880 their goals overlapped, which I do not think that they do anymore.
00:27:43.680 I guess allied in, you know, oppression or minority status.
00:27:48.120 Well, no, they were allied in how they were separated from society, which led to them,
00:27:51.720 any group that is separated from society in any way is going to begin to develop new cultural norms.
00:27:57.220 And those cultural norms begin to develop an inter-community identity.
00:28:01.000 And so they begin to develop a culture around the reason they were excommunicated from society,
00:28:06.580 which then meant the reason that they were excommunicated from society
00:28:09.280 ended up becoming like their highest order of identity.
00:28:12.300 identity, but it didn't exist in a meaningful, like when you actually look at the data,
00:28:16.520 it's actually like far more nuanced than that.
00:28:18.880 Like the Kinsey scale is completely garbage.
00:28:20.540 Read the Pragmented Sky to Sexuality or see our video on this.
00:28:22.800 Like it, that is not the way human sexuality works at all.
00:28:26.120 But, and again, we're not saying that there aren't a huge portion of men who are also attracted
00:28:29.780 to men or women who are also attracted to women.
00:28:31.680 I would say that within bisexual populations, when you actually look at the data,
00:28:35.860 like on dating platforms, they actually like will overwhelmingly prefer to date just one gender.
00:28:42.860 And this may be a very strong preference you're seeing within the bisexual population,
00:28:45.980 or it may mean that a lot of the attacks on the bisexual population are actually accurate.
00:28:51.260 But typically, for example, within men, only 20% of bisexuals actually like do that.
00:28:55.380 Whereas in women, it's something like 35%.
00:28:57.120 So it's actually a meaningful.
00:28:58.500 I was actually surprised within women,
00:28:59.900 so many bisexual women are actually really just only dating one gender or the other gender,
00:29:04.000 which you can see, but apparently they switch up as well, which men don't do as much.
00:29:08.440 Like they're really persistent on which their preferable gender is.
00:29:11.780 Although you do see what's in the bisexual community.
00:29:14.040 Interesting, a lot of them leaving around the age where they might be getting scared
00:29:17.300 that they're not going to be able to have kids.
00:29:20.240 So, so you have all that, but this has led to this leftist distortion field
00:29:23.760 around how they're able to do sexual research,
00:29:25.800 which means that you and me and, and, and within things like the Pragmented Sky to Sexuality,
00:29:30.560 we are able to have discussions that are truer and obviously truer to young people
00:29:37.260 than the discussions that are happening in the left.
00:29:38.760 And when they see that, that completely prevents the left
00:29:42.240 from being able to use sexuality as a wedge to take them out of our cultural groups.
00:29:47.460 But this requires actually engaging with sexuality
00:29:50.840 and understanding why we had some of these historic practices,
00:29:54.580 like the denigration of porn.
00:29:56.140 Asking why we would study this stuff so diligently or spend so much time researching it
00:30:01.360 is like asking a prisoner why they would spend so much time researching the bars of their cage.
00:30:07.100 If we are trapped in these fleshy prisons that enforce emotions and desires upon us
00:30:14.580 we did not ask for, it is in part our duty to study and understand them
00:30:20.140 so that we can better escape them
00:30:22.240 and better prevent them from controlling and influencing our actions.
00:30:25.820 If you are trapped in a room with a wild, dangerous animal,
00:30:29.520 the goal of any righteous individual is to ensure that this wild animal,
00:30:34.200 this lower part of themselves,
00:30:36.240 doesn't become the core focus of their lives and identity.
00:30:39.900 But there are multiple paths towards achieving that.
00:30:42.680 For example, you can spend every waking moment attempting to tame and control the beast,
00:30:47.320 or you can learn to feed it just enough to keep it from bothering you.
00:30:52.500 And through better understanding the beast,
00:30:54.760 we can better understand how to deprioritize it
00:30:58.860 in terms of our daily thoughts and actions.
00:31:02.080 Now that the left, you know, Tracer Butt scandal, Gamergate,
00:31:05.780 has ceded male sexuality,
00:31:08.000 we are insane for not picking that up.
00:31:11.240 They said anything that turns on males is intrinsically immoral, basically.
00:31:16.320 And now we can go scoop up the remains of that,
00:31:20.380 which is a large part of the male community, right?
00:31:23.060 Because they don't like being denigrated for what turns them on.
00:31:25.660 And incorporate that with more traditional frameworks
00:31:28.700 in a way that these two things can work together.
00:31:31.160 And they can work together.
00:31:33.000 But they work together because it is true
00:31:36.060 that going out and sleeping with a lot of people
00:31:37.460 is probably not in your best interest when you look at the data.
00:31:40.260 And that's the great thing about all of this,
00:31:43.920 is that because what we're fighting for is truth,
00:31:46.820 truth is always on our side.
00:31:49.740 Convenient.
00:31:51.440 Convenient.
00:31:51.900 Very convenient.
00:31:52.420 Well, no, I mean, if they only were fighting with integrity
00:31:55.140 and for actually protecting people,
00:31:56.960 then truth would be on their side as well.
00:31:58.780 But they're not.
00:31:59.080 Yeah, but I mean, it also gives us flexibility
00:32:00.980 that other groups don't have,
00:32:03.040 which is to say, if we get better evidence,
00:32:04.640 we get to just say, oh, sorry, we were wrong.
00:32:07.520 And then pursue what we understand to be right,
00:32:11.140 given the evidence.
00:32:12.000 So I think the greatest thing about the fighting for truth stance
00:32:15.780 is that it's okay to be wrong.
00:32:18.940 It's actually really important to learn when you're wrong
00:32:20.820 so that you can be less wrong and more right going forward.
00:32:24.780 And that no matter how imperfect our knowledge is,
00:32:28.620 we can always try to do a little bit better
00:32:30.640 and get closer to the truth,
00:32:31.900 whereas other groups are just kind of stuck with their stances.
00:32:34.080 But I'm really, really glad you shared this theory with me.
00:32:37.840 I do, I don't know, I wonder like how societies
00:32:41.660 could change culturally in a way that would prepare men
00:32:46.340 to understand this bifurcation,
00:32:48.380 because there's a lot of things like we discussed
00:32:50.760 in another conversation recently,
00:32:52.800 how like both men and women really aren't really taught
00:32:56.920 to bring anything to the table.
00:32:58.360 So is it no wonder that even with all these different
00:33:00.700 government incentives and programs,
00:33:02.060 men and women are still just completely disinterested
00:33:05.760 in getting married?
00:33:06.980 And it's easy to, you know,
00:33:08.100 sort of through propaganda, education, et cetera,
00:33:10.660 explain again and again,
00:33:12.080 here's what you can bring to the table.
00:33:14.120 Always keep in mind what you need to bring to the table.
00:33:16.260 But how would you train people around this?
00:33:18.480 How would you prepare young men around this?
00:33:21.420 Just make them aware of this truth.
00:33:23.760 The thing that turns them on with porn
00:33:25.600 is not necessarily what's going to turn them on
00:33:27.680 with a long-term partner.
00:33:28.600 And then they shouldn't incorporate those things
00:33:32.880 into your identity.
00:33:34.140 And also keep in mind that the things
00:33:36.840 that seduce women in bars are not the things
00:33:40.020 that seduce the good long-term partner
00:33:42.420 that you want to be married to for the rest of your life.
00:33:45.520 These are two different sexual optimization functions.
00:33:48.800 And if you waste a bunch of time optimizing
00:33:50.920 around the wrong one, you will get divorce great.
00:33:54.960 All right, good, solid advice.
00:33:59.620 I love you, Malcolm.
00:34:01.280 I love you too, Simone.
00:34:02.160 You're an amazing woman.
00:34:03.140 And I am desperately lucky
00:34:05.420 that I married somebody so clear-headed and intelligent
00:34:10.760 and that helps me see the world more clearly every day.
00:34:14.520 And so thank you for that.
00:34:16.220 Hopefully more so when I don't have a fever anymore.
00:34:20.340 I love you though.
00:34:21.300 Thanks for taking care of me.
00:34:22.820 You're the best.
00:34:23.560 Thanks.
00:34:43.560 I love you.
00:34:47.200 Amen.
00:34:47.600 Amen.
00:34:48.060 Amen.
00:34:48.080 Amen.
00:34:48.820 Amen.
00:34:49.140 Amen.
00:34:50.100 Amen.
00:34:50.640 Amen.
00:34:51.200 Amen.
00:34:51.280 Amen.