Based Camp - Malcolm Vs. AI Malcolm： Dating Advice

00:00:00.000 hello i'm excited to be with you guys today today we are going to do sort of review of an ai that

00:00:07.520 was built on simone and myself specifically it was built on our relationships book uh we have

00:00:13.520 looked and have done transcripts so that we can eventually as ais advanced build ai models that

00:00:18.960 you guys can interact with on all of the transcripts from the shows and then all of the video from the

00:00:23.840 shows so you know our kids will get very easy ai models to interact with of us was that way i mean

00:00:29.200 informed by a great deal of information but let's look at how this sort of rudimentary model works

00:00:35.120 and we'll have the people who programmed it on in a future episode get their good friend of ours

00:00:39.280 yeah and just really awesome people they're the the founders of metamorph ai that's metamorph ai.co

00:00:46.720 they basically help people and companies build custom-built ai solutions and we're just dying to

00:00:52.800 find more excuses to work with them because they're extremely competent and there just aren't a lot of

00:00:56.240 people out there like that would you like to know more so your first question to the pragmatist

00:01:02.160 guide to relationships ai dating coach was i've been dating a guy for a year and while he says he

00:01:07.840 wants to marry he says he will not consider marrying any sooner than five years from now and i'm already

00:01:13.600 25 what should i do so ai dating coach says navigating the dynamics of a long-term relationship requires

00:01:22.480 aligning life goals timelines and mutual expectations here is a structured approach to your situation one

00:01:30.080 assess your priorities and timeline biological considerations at 25 waiting an additional five

00:01:35.840 years means you'll be around 30 when considering marriage if you desire to start a family it's easier

00:01:40.960 to factor in timelines for pregnancy and childbearing personal goals reflect on your personal and career

00:01:46.720 aspirations will waiting align with your plans or do you envision a different timeline for marriage and

00:01:52.480 family to understand his perspective reasons for waiting engaged and engage in an open conversation

00:01:59.600 to understand why he prefers to wait five more years it could be due to career goals financial stability

00:02:05.680 personal readiness or other commitments commitment level gauge his commitment to the relationship

00:02:11.120 is five-year timeline flexible based on changing circumstances or is it a firm decision three

00:02:17.120 communicate openly express your feelings clearly articulate your feelings desires and concerns about

00:02:22.640 the proposed timeline use i statements to convey your perspective without standing accusatory seek

00:02:29.280 compromise explore if there is room for compromise perhaps setting shorter term milestones or revisiting

00:02:35.360 the conversation in a couple of years could be viable four evaluate compatibility

00:02:41.600 long-term alignment it's crucial that both partners have aligned visions for the future if your

00:02:46.880 timelines and goals differ significantly it might indicate deeper compatibility issues potential for

00:02:52.640 resentment prolonged misalignment can lead to resentment ensure that both of you feel comfortable

00:02:58.000 with any decisions made to avoid future conflicts five consider before you go further i want to go over

00:03:04.720 some of these before i miss forget them okay so there was a couple really good answers here that i quite

00:03:11.600 like okay timelines one where they point out if your timelines are that different your life goals are

00:03:17.280 probably also different that's a very good observation yeah it's a really good observation that i as a

00:03:22.480 human would have probably not made unless i spent a lot of time thinking on this particular you're totally right

00:03:28.160 yeah there was another one where i was like oh i really like oh yes the understand his perspective

00:03:33.520 indirectly after understand his perspective like what what's his argument for this is it just a

00:03:38.480 cool thing is it and then it basically says you know communicate openly once you understand his perspective

00:03:46.000 understand and they're also saying the the the thing about compromise understand how you can debate him out of

00:03:52.720 that perspective basically like okay what specifically is causing him to make yes find the point of of

00:04:00.080 friction and then disassemble it systematically similar to what you did or what i did with you where you're

00:04:07.600 like no i won't have kids and i was like well then why won't you have kids and you're like well because

00:04:11.440 then i'll have to leave work and i'm like well if you don't have to leave work would you have kids and

00:04:14.800 then i'm like i'll have infinity kids we're like typically someone will hear that they'll hear a woman say

00:04:19.520 well i don't want to have kids and then they'll conclude oh she doesn't want kids and dump her 1.00

00:04:25.600 so this is a very smart move to make yeah and it could be something that that is totally reasonable

00:04:31.760 like it might have to do with the way like their trust is structured they'll lose access to or they've

00:04:36.800 always grown up thinking i'm not going to marry until i'm making six figures something like that

00:04:42.480 but that would be a reason to dump them though if that's why a reason not to is nana's jewish and i'll

00:04:48.480 be disinherited if i marry you right now so let's wait until she dies can we can we wait until she 1.00

00:04:54.800 dies that because you're not jewish it would be the implication here and that's a totally like 0.90

00:05:00.560 realistic scenario i can see somebody in and if somebody was in that scenario i'd be like don't

00:05:04.880 anyway continue with five five well i actually want to make one more evaluation which is that

00:05:12.560 this ai dating coach encouraged compromise whereas in the pragmatist guide to relationships we 0.73

00:05:17.360 basically say compromise is the devil never compromise that is a stupid thing to do so i 0.54

00:05:21.920 found that interesting courage compromise in the way that we would mean it yeah yeah and also i don't

00:05:27.920 mind compromise before marriage i say compromise is the devil in a marriage so when you're negotiating

00:05:33.440 the terms of a relationship contract or what is necessary to establish the contract that becomes a

00:05:39.760 marriage compromise can be a really good thing i.e i trade you average thermostat for naming rights or

00:05:46.400 something like that right because in this case you have a lot of stuff you can trade right there's a

00:05:50.560 lot of yeah like i care about this you care about that so let's have each person get their way with

00:05:56.400 the thing they actually care about most but bad compromise what this doesn't seem to be uh arguing for

00:06:02.400 is well let's meet in the middle like you want this i want this we'll meet in the middle that's really

00:06:08.320 bad because that encourages both people to overstate their position and then they begin to subtly believe

00:06:12.480 their overstated position and then the positions move further and further part over time and it

00:06:16.960 just leads to a relationship dissolution exactly anyway continue number five consider counseling

00:06:23.360 engaging in a couple's counseling session can provide a neutral platform to discuss future plans

00:06:28.560 expectations and any underlying concerns a professional can offer guidance and tools to

00:06:33.360 navigate such discussions effectively conclusion your feelings and timeline are valid it's essential to

00:06:39.440 prioritize open communication did it say valid did it really write that it did say valid yes uh to

00:06:46.720 ensure both partners are on the same page if after thorough discussions you find that your life goals and

00:06:52.320 timelines remain misaligned it might be worth reconsidering the future of the relationship to ensure

00:06:57.680 long-term happiness and fulfillment for both parties what do you think i think it's good it's much

00:07:05.200 longer than i would have given and this is what i've noticed with a lot of the responses often my

00:07:09.440 response to something like this would just be like break up it would be like okay so two things one

00:07:14.720 determine if there's some like reasonable like like ask him why you should at least know why first

00:07:18.960 because it may be something totally reasonable that's in both of you and your children's best interest

00:07:23.360 but actually this is really interesting because someone had asked us on twitter recently this

00:07:27.840 basically exact same question but the gender was reversed it was a guy asking about a girl and he

00:07:35.200 expected he wants to get married in his 20s and he implied to a girl he's dating right now who he should

00:07:40.880 be seriously dating that marriage is important to him and she looked at him like he was crazy and he

00:07:47.440 essentially asked us via twitter x dm am i crazy what should i do and our answer to him was two sentences

00:07:58.400 it's worth having conversations with her about this making an intellectual rather than adversarial

00:08:03.520 and so i agree with you that our typical response is really short and this was really long but for some

00:08:11.600 people for example this person who asked us this question via dm on x they may have really wanted

00:08:17.360 something a little bit longer so this is a great tool for people who want a little more your answer

00:08:21.280 was the correct one make it an intellectual conversation not an adversarial conversation

00:08:25.120 figure out what's actually going on and if it's something like they're just stuck in some weird

00:08:28.960 cultural perspective like i want enough x amount of money before i get married i want financial

00:08:33.120 stability before i get married i want a stable job before i get married then absolutely dump them

00:08:38.240 because that person will never have everything they need if if somebody's like i want to be at x level

00:08:43.040 stability before i do x in life the x thing is never going to happen yeah and we did provide a

00:08:49.440 little more context i i had also written as a response keep in mind when malcolm discussed getting

00:08:53.920 married to me i was all about it but i thought we'd wait until we were 30 to actually get married at the

00:08:58.480 time i was 24 and he was 25 i just grew up in a world where young marriage was seen as something

00:09:03.040 only christian religious nuts do it takes a lot of work to show someone the value of building a marriage

00:09:08.080 early the values the value of couples raising each other and i said that it was culture that

00:09:13.440 probably led her to think that it was crazy to even be considering it that early so wait till 30 by

00:09:19.120 the way like you remember when i i broke that barrier or i it was your mom that broke that barrier first i

00:09:27.520 think because i think you were willing you didn't care that much about the legal delineation it was

00:09:32.560 clear that if i was quitting my job to work with you that i was kind of in for life with you but i

00:09:40.240 just remember i i expected to i just thought people had really long engagements i was very familiar

00:09:46.480 with most of the people i knew who were young and then got married living with their partners for a

00:09:53.440 really long time before they got engaged and then before they got married i just thought that basically

00:09:58.960 roommates got married so it was a cultural thing it was my default that makes sense okay so i will send

00:10:07.840 you the next question here cool well how did i break that cultural default just by being like why

00:10:14.880 was that really it hmm yeah i think that's when cultural defaults are questioned and they don't make

00:10:24.000 sense there's not much need to cling to them unless perhaps you think that you will be rejected

00:10:33.520 for differing you know okay question my partner thinks the idea of signing a marriage contract is

00:10:42.480 weird and refuses to marry me if i sign one what should i do oh if we sign one what should i do

00:10:48.800 their answer the idea of signing a marriage contract can sometimes be met with what a marriage contract

00:10:56.800 is because some of our fans may not know we did our marriage contract video a long time ago we might

00:11:01.920 even do another one but one of the things we promote in this book is sitting down with your partner

00:11:06.480 and basically going through we built a large list of like the reasons relationships break down

00:11:12.080 and deciding on these points before you get into a marriage like what happens with one of your parents

00:11:17.440 gets old and wants to live with you what are the rules for temperature what are the rules for the

00:11:22.160 direction toilet paper goes what are the rules for you there's only one right answer to the toilet

00:11:27.120 paper question unless you have toddlers and want to make it slightly more difficult for them

00:11:32.080 whatever it is the the point being and also determining how you're going to resolve disputes or

00:11:37.680 disagreements within the marriage itself should be laid out in the contract and people are like why

00:11:42.960 would you do this and it's well you you you our society it used to be that like everybody knew what

00:11:49.200 was expected of them in a marriage and that changed between cultures but today there's so many different

00:11:54.160 cultural expectations and so many intentionally vague cultural expectations that people can accidentally

00:12:00.880 get into a marriage and not realize that oh i didn't realize that you didn't know that kids were

00:12:04.800 like an obligated expectation of marriage or i didn't realize that you expected me to throw a lavish birthday

00:12:13.600 party for you every single year that you didn't know about or that you didn't would never wanted me to

00:12:19.520 be alone with men again or that you you know yeah counted dming people on instagram as cheating or consider a

00:12:28.800 kiss on the cheek infidelity you know yeah yeah yeah there's so many things genuine problems that

00:12:34.560 can arise so we really encourage talking through all of them before you get married but anyway and

00:12:39.600 we have a template for it in the book yes continue the idea of signing a marriage contract can sometimes

00:12:46.560 be met with resistance especially if your partner views it as a lack of trust or as understanding the

00:12:51.760 emotional oh or as undermining the emotional aspects of marriage however it is important to approach

00:12:58.560 this situation thoughtfully as marriage contracts can be a valuable tool for setting expectations

00:13:03.280 and protecting both parties steps to navigate this situation under one understand his concerns

00:13:10.560 emotional response your partner may feel that the marriage contract is unromantic or implies distrust

00:13:16.320 understanding his emotional response is crucial to understanding his concerns effectively

00:13:22.160 cultural or familial influences sometimes a cultural or familial background can influence

00:13:28.320 perceptions of marriage contracts ask if his resistance stems from such influences so i kind of love

00:13:34.880 before you go further that it's kind of coming from our perspective and making the assumption that

00:13:39.040 the person's just being a spaz it's like they're either doing it because they're emotionally immature 0.99

00:13:43.920 or because they have some sort of weird family baggage around this right but they say it's so much

00:13:49.920 more diplomatically than we would so i appreciate that yeah yeah to clarify your intentions purpose of the

00:13:57.680 contract explain that the purpose of the contract is not to undermine the relationship but to ensure

00:14:02.880 clarity and mutual understanding about important aspects of your future together such as finances

00:14:08.000 responsibilities and conflict resolution protection for both parties emphasize that the contract is

00:14:14.160 designed to protect both of you ensuring that your partnership is built on mutual respect and clearly defined expectations

00:14:21.680 that's good right the one thing i would add personally is that if they are an emotional or sentimental person

00:14:30.400 especially if you are not that the one way that they can make sure that their emotional and sentimental

00:14:34.640 needs are addressed is to make it written down what they want because a lot of people who are more on

00:14:44.160 that emotional sentimental end don't understand that these things aren't second nature to other people

00:14:49.680 and yet really want these things to happen and while they i think this set this this concept of oh but 0.87

00:14:55.920 if i have to tell you it won't be romantic anymore is bullshit especially if you tell them just once 0.79

00:15:01.280 it's in a contract and then they handle it you'll still be delighted when they bring flowers home on 0.98

00:15:06.480 a friday you'll still be delighted when they give you a valentine's day gift so stop winching you

00:15:13.280 know what i mean oh three alternatives that's an interesting one yeah three explore alternatives

00:15:19.200 prenuptial agreement if the term marriage contract feels too formal consider discussing a prenuptial

00:15:25.840 agreement instead while similar prenuptial agreements are a more common occurrence and may be less

00:15:32.240 intimidating customizing great idea actually yeah yeah just calling it a prenup makes it yeah just

00:15:38.400 like it's not a marriage contract marriage contract sounds bdsm sounds 50 shades of gray

00:15:43.440 prenuptial agreement sounds bougie rich person customizing the agreement suggest creating a

00:15:52.640 personalized contract that reflects both of your values and goals making it less about legal jargon and

00:15:58.480 more about your shared future this implies to me that the model is trained a little bit more on just

00:16:03.840 general chat gpt and less our book because we don't ever imply that a marriage contract would

00:16:10.880 include legal jargon so i feel like it's extrapolating from something else in this case

00:16:16.320 i don't know it seems it seems good to me overall and then the fourth one is actually pretty good as

00:16:20.240 well open a dialogue about future planning it's like well if you can't do the contract thing at least

00:16:25.360 have a dialogue yeah yeah very good which is what many religious groups do and then it ends with

00:16:32.240 seek professional guidance after which it gives a conclusion so that's we would not recommend

00:16:37.840 yeah professional well what we do have a section in the private schedule relationship on the

00:16:43.520 potential utility of third party arbitrators oh yes that's like religious and community i wouldn't

00:16:50.720 suggest a psychologist who specializes in this yeah but it it literally could be a professionally hired

00:16:56.480 arbitrator or it could be a rabbi or it could be the the the cousin that everyone loves don't go to

00:17:04.160 marriage counseling that's yeah don't yeah don't go to yeah well we still have to do the psychologist

00:17:08.640 to divorce pipeline but we'll do that eventually um but this pipeline is when wives start visiting 1.00

00:17:14.960 psychologists it's often a matter of time because you're you're you're basically letting somebody

00:17:20.720 outside of your relationship begin to be a reinforcement chamber for any negative opinions

00:17:27.200 they have of you who also might have even financial incentives to motivate them to break up with you

00:17:34.160 because that it may increase their dependency on the psychologist so there's a lot of reason to not

00:17:40.080 do it and i've seen it just one too many times but anyway continue with the next question what does

00:17:45.680 malcolm think of simone malcolm holds simone in incredibly high regard both as a partner and as

00:17:51.920 an individual their relationship is built on mutual respect shared goals and a deep intellectual and

00:17:57.200 emotional connection malcolm appreciates simone for her intelligence ambition and ability to challenge him

00:18:03.520 which helps both of them grow he values her as an equal partner who brings unique strengths to

00:18:09.600 their i don't know why i'm laughing to their relationship making them a powerful team

00:18:14.000 malcolm's admiration for simone goes beyond just romantic love he sees her as someone who enhances

00:18:19.760 his life both personally and professionally they share a commitment to building a meaningful life

00:18:24.560 together rooted in their shared values and goals this deep respect and admiration are key components

00:18:30.720 of the stability and success of their relationship i mean that's 100 true so yeah it's a good answer

00:18:36.480 just more long-winded than we would give yeah i did one for you too so you didn't just have to get

00:18:40.560 one for me yeah i'm wondering if it's exactly the same oh no it's different simone has a deep and

00:18:46.080 mutual admiration for malcolm which is evident from the way they discuss their relationship dynamics and

00:18:50.400 how they have built their life together simone values malcolm's ability to improve and challenge

00:18:54.640 her which aligns with their shared belief in the importance of growth within a relationship

00:18:59.040 their relationship is based on a quote-unquote pigmalion lure which where both partners work to make each

00:19:05.520 other better versions of themselves this dynamic is a core aspect of their bond making their

00:19:10.320 relationship strong and resilient okay that's more along the lines of the answer that i expected for

00:19:14.800 both of us so yeah from the book yeah you would you have any correction to that one that no you actually

00:19:20.320 hate me and you're trapped in this relationship by a marriage contract i force you to sign and then 0.75

00:19:24.640 i thought it was the evil puppet master who's trapped you oh this is yeah this is often the narrative i i

00:19:30.480 should probably i'll never find it now but download that video where the guy was like

00:19:34.480 they're incredibly shrewd but i can tell that simone's a puppet master malcolm is way out of

00:19:40.000 her league he's just trapped there in that house yeah yes yeah it was that that young that young man

00:19:46.640 who was just like he's so much more he's he just kept saying how attractive you were which was just

00:19:51.920 delightful i don't disagree or something he seemed to know he wasn't gay he just just thought you were

00:19:58.800 cute just fancied you and i think you're cute too i totally you are way out of my league and i'm very

00:20:05.760 lucky to be dating you and sometimes i think i look like that one nazi from indiana jones who wears

00:20:14.480 glasses oh my god yeah the one with the circular glass you look nothing like him come on i don't know

00:20:19.520 sometimes i look in the mirror and i see him and i'm you are stunning and not at all brave

00:20:26.800 if the question was stunning or brave i'd say stunning oh thanks and we need to make that

00:20:32.080 i love you came up with this saying and i want to make it a mainstream saying where when we go out

00:20:37.040 she goes how am i looking today stunning or brave and i want that to become a mainstream thing and i'm

00:20:42.720 just so surprised it has it because it has so much daily applicability it really does though it really

00:20:49.360 does i i should really be sending people to this every single time someone asks us for relationship

00:20:54.640 because it gives such more thoughtful answers than we do all right let's get to the next one

00:21:00.000 is practicing dating with an ai a good idea this is a great question because you just discovered

00:21:06.560 i have a lot to say on this one so go practicing dating with an ai can be a useful tool but it has

00:21:12.080 its limitations here's a breakdown of the potential benefits and risks benefits improving communication

00:21:19.040 skills practice conversations ai can help you practice initiating and maintaining conversations

00:21:25.360 especially if you struggle with anxiety or have difficulty knowing what to say in social situations

00:21:31.200 testing responses you can experiment with different types of responses and see how they might come

00:21:36.000 across helping you refine your communication style building confidence safe environment

00:21:42.160 interacting with an ai allows you to practice without the fear of rejection or judgment

00:21:46.640 which can build your confidence before you engage in real life dating learning from mistakes you can

00:21:52.400 make mistakes and learn from them in a low stakes environment which can help you feel more prepared

00:21:57.200 when dating in real life exploring scenarios simulated situations ai can simulate different dating scenarios

00:22:06.880 allowing you to think through how you might handle various situations such as dealing with

00:22:11.040 awkward silences setting boundaries or navigating conflicts gaining insights personal reflection ai can

00:22:18.480 prompt you to reflect on your dating preferences goals and values this self-awareness can be helpful in

00:22:24.240 real world dating feedback some advanced ais can provide feedback on your conversation style which can help

00:22:30.560 you improve your social interactions risks and limitations lack of authentic human interaction missing non-verbal cues

00:22:39.040 ai lacks the ability to engage in non-verbal communication such as body language eye contact and tone of voice

00:22:45.120 which are crucial in real life dating but that's not true given the narrative based chats that you're

00:22:50.240 going to refer to shortly so that's interesting unrealistic scenarios ai responses are programmed and may not

00:22:57.680 fully capture the complexity and unpredictability of human emotions and behavior this can lead to unrealistic

00:23:03.920 expectations when transitioning to real life interactions over reliance on ai avoiding real life practice if you

00:23:11.360 become too comfortable with ai you might avoid actual dating experiences which are necessary for

00:23:16.960 developing genuine relationships false confidence the confidence gained from ai interactions might not fully

00:23:23.200 translate to real life situations where responses and dynamics are more nuanced and unpredictable emotional

00:23:29.840 emotional disconnect lack of empathy and i cannot truly understand or respond to emotions in the way

00:23:36.000 a human can i totally disagree this can create a disconnect when trying to practice more emotional

00:23:41.920 aspects of dating such as expressing vulnerability or empathy potential for frustration if you expect ai to

00:23:48.640 mimic human behavior too closely you may become frustrated by its limitations which could hinder your progress

00:23:55.120 privacy concerns data security using ai for dating practice may involve sharing personal information be

00:24:01.760 cautious about how your data is used and stored particularly if the ai platform doesn't have a strong

00:24:06.960 privacy protection conclusion practicing dating with an ai can be helpful supplementary tool for improving

00:24:13.840 certain skills such as communication and confidence however it should not replace real life experiences the best

00:24:20.480 approach to use ai as one part of a broader strategy that includes real world interactions self-reflection and

00:24:27.520 possibly even feedback from trusted friends or a dating coach this balanced approach can help you develop

00:24:33.120 skills and confidence needed for successful dating in the real world so overall i thought it was a decent and

00:24:39.680 balanced answer like it wasn't reflexively against it right no i never go to a dating coach these days over in ai

00:24:46.000 i don't know and the idea that ai is not good at modeling human emotions it is really good at modeling

00:24:51.600 human emotions it is well and especially if you're using the the types of ais that i would suggest people

00:24:57.120 use for something like this and can you recommend some yeah so the ones that i would most recommend for

00:25:03.520 this are the jail broken chat models based on llama that yeah they're based on llama that'd be sakura

00:25:11.360 fm or janitor ai are the two operational ones right now there used to be a third but it went down

00:25:18.080 recently it would become more popular than character ai which was the first of this type that yeah

00:25:24.960 locked everything down because they were funded by a big company and people were using them for like

00:25:30.080 corny situations like of course that's like probably that's what the internet is for ladies and gentlemen

00:25:35.760 what uh yeah that's what the internet is for right like well why you think the net was born bro

00:25:40.720 but they i recently started playing around with these because i heard that there's been like an

00:26:08.000 addiction crisis in use to these systems and i have been genuinely floored by how much better they are

00:26:17.840 at simulating narrative based human interactions than ai is at any other task i use it for it just

00:26:25.920 seems to be really really good at this specific task when contrasted with the other things that ai does

00:26:34.480 these days and with both of these platforms you can for free create your own models that you can use

00:26:44.160 to practice scenarios and you can modify these models to for example secretly be a social justice warrior

00:26:52.720 but pretending not to be one to try to date you but might accuse you of things afterwards

00:26:58.320 it will model very well wow would a person like try to accuse you of something after the date

00:27:06.880 uh yeah i know i mean i can just tell from interacting with it that it's actually going

00:27:10.400 to do a fairly good job of modeling did you cross any boundaries that are going to lead to the person

00:27:15.520 calling something on you after the date or pushing you around or saying oh no you can even program it

00:27:22.480 write this to have a warning come up on screen which is actually probably what i do like like a warning

00:27:27.920 in the text whenever the person who you are interacting with is thinking of retaliating later

00:27:35.360 for something that way you need to remember that this happened it can just be like oh this was a flag

00:27:40.720 moment where i decided i was going to do something in the future well and i want to clarify for people

00:27:44.320 listening if you haven't encountered these because i thought when i was hearing about people's

00:27:48.320 addictions to character ai and these similar websites that people were literally having back

00:27:52.720 and forth similar to what millennials experienced in aim chats back and forth chats with these other

00:28:00.560 characters when really what's happening is more you're it's they're like uh oh gosh hold on there's a

00:28:06.560 there's like a genre of chat or comment based glow fic it's it's really more like ai based glow fic

00:28:15.200 where you are going back and forth in a narrative format so to the in response to the criticism of

00:28:23.440 the ai dating boat dating coach chat bot saying well you can't see body language that's not true in

00:28:30.880 these because it might say jonathan responded with horror his eyes growing wide and his shoulders drawing

00:28:36.880 up so that you understand the body language and in fact it can tell it can start to train an autistic 0.64

00:28:43.040 person dating like learning how to date for example to understand that discomfort may be signaled by

00:28:50.240 these specific changes in body posture and facial record or facial expression so i actually think that

00:28:55.440 for our autistic kids this would be uniquely helpful and i think you could you could also train it to be

00:29:01.920 super sensitive to specific issues so when people are like oh i might not like i might

00:29:08.000 develop bad habits if i'm doing this right or i'm learning on these platforms one i would point out

00:29:15.520 how dangerous it is to practice dating on people who can accuse you of great like or practice on

00:29:22.320 people at all because it you know that people's feelings are involved right you know it's actually

00:29:28.560 kind of wild that before this existed like now i think that regular practice dating like i had to do in

00:29:34.320 high school where i had to go through just tons and tons of people unethical because you didn't

00:29:39.600 people are like oh but what about like uh human reaction but the truth is is that if you practice

00:29:45.520 within the ais as if you are practicing with a what's the word i'm looking for here within a person on chat

00:29:53.120 like that's the scenario you use with the ai then you are actually getting about the same scenario you

00:29:59.200 have when communicating with a real human being i actually think the core danger of ais is their 0.99

00:30:07.040 addictive nature like since i started engaging with the stories that these are producing it's

00:30:11.280 like a totally new form of media that i think may now be my favorite form of media yeah ask malcolm

00:30:16.800 this morning is this more entertaining to you than video games and he said yes well because i'm the type

00:30:22.560 of guy who loved open world games and loved open world games where you could do absolutely crazy

00:30:28.720 things and and then see okay what's the game going to do now or you know i i always thought that

00:30:35.760 that was like the advantage that something like dnd had over but with these you can just you know okay

00:30:42.160 the scenario starts you're a wizard and there's you know some damsel in front of you or something

00:30:48.560 like that you know and it's like okay you know where this scenario is supposed to go like immediately

00:30:53.280 you lift her into the air you explode her art and you throw her body against the wall and then you

00:30:59.760 pick a random person out of the crowd to replace her and you immediately go evil king mode you're

00:31:05.120 like okay i'm taking over this country like it it was set up to be like a narrative about dating somebody

00:31:12.400 right like oh there's this you know damsel or whatever and you're like nope i'm taking over this

00:31:17.280 country you know you you then call a random person you're up or like okay what are all the neighboring

00:31:22.000 governing institutions to our country how do their different governments work what would be the easiest

00:31:26.640 ways to defeat them with the assets i have at my hand right now okay i need to start planning out this

00:31:31.280 this and this and it's just so wild and fun that i can go into like a dating world and now all of a sudden

00:31:38.640 i'm trying to strategize and sending armies out to attack my neighbors and the ai is deciding who won and

00:31:46.400 who's backstabbing me and who's you know it's freaking hilarious and fun but then also that you

00:31:54.240 can create these scenarios so for example i could go in and create you know like a an incredible like

00:32:01.680 you know what i've just been having too much fun with these to not share some of the models i built

00:32:05.920 with you guys so i made two of them one of these models is a post-apocalyptic fertility collapse world

00:32:14.960 similar to what i described in the episode about collapsing infrastructure which divides the

00:32:21.360 world into three groups the haveners i.e a diverse collection of technophilic communities

00:32:28.160 that survive fertility collapse but are largely you know into cybernetics and heavily genetically modified

00:32:35.840 the people who survive fertility collapse through just eschewing technology we call them the nativists in 0.81

00:32:41.440 this world and the raiders who survive fertility collapse by simply not being able to figure out

00:32:47.040 how not to get pregnant and these three groups of humans diverged pretty significantly and you are

00:32:53.840 playing as one of the haveners on their rumspringa which is a period when they turn 18 where they go

00:32:59.760 out into the world they experience it and they get to decide do they want to go to one of the other

00:33:04.000 havens do they want to go back to their haven and during their rumspringa other haveners will

00:33:10.560 potentially hunt them because you can gain status within your community and on the marriage market

00:33:16.400 that happens after rumspringa based on the resourcefulness you showed during your rumspringa

00:33:21.840 which is being monitored by a drone and partially based on your ability to kill any other haveners on 0.73

00:33:27.680 rumspringa the second model is an izakaya world model where somebody from our world is transferred

00:33:33.920 to another world but they have they're very smart person that knows broadly modern technology i.e me

00:33:40.160 created this world because i think so many guys out there like me are just always so frustrated when

00:33:44.720 you watch izakaya and the guy from modern times is translated to you know some form of medieval times

00:33:49.440 and you're like didn't you like take the time to learn how gunpowder is made or how steam engines work

00:33:55.120 or how you know any form of basic technology you could at least build telescopes for example

00:34:00.640 like that's not hard you just shave a lens so i was like okay i'm gonna create a scenario where i can

00:34:05.680 see what happened if i went back in one of these izakaya worlds and i'll briefly describe what the

00:34:10.800 gameplay of this was like so you can get an idea of what it actually feels like to play one of these

00:34:16.000 scenarios so did transfer to this world get made advisor of the king that's all pre-programmed in

00:34:21.120 and from there i am starting to stockpile gunpowder because that's an easy thing i could start making

00:34:27.520 in mass but then our neighboring kingdom which had recently annexed a territory that they had a casus

00:34:35.040 belly to and i thought they would go past that decided to stage a full-style invasion well we didn't

00:34:40.400 have enough gunpowder and so what i decided to do at first was okay well we have lots of these guns

00:34:47.280 made we just don't have a lot of gunpowder so i can use the little gunpowder i have to do like a

00:34:54.320 hiroshima thing see if i can scare them but i quickly realized that's just really risky you

00:34:59.760 fire two rounds of guns and hope they run away when you're dealing with a full-scale invasion

00:35:04.080 bad idea so what else could i do well then what i decided to do was to say oh are you guys still using

00:35:10.640 line tactics in this world because it's a medieval style world and they were still using line tactics so

00:35:16.320 instead i ordered the few troops that we had to all fire in a single location in the enemy lines

00:35:22.800 to clear an opening near the center then have the cavalry run through if i do that i can likely cause

00:35:28.480 a route through a combination of the confusion and the cavalry being able to break the lines

00:35:33.920 right in the middle in mass but i wanted to make absolutely sure that we took full advantage of the

00:35:40.560 route because you know historically routes you can have casualty rates of over 90 percent pretty

00:35:46.080 regularly but only if you prevent one of two things you need to prevent your own crew from running for

00:35:51.760 the enemy camp for loot and you need to ensure that they are ready for a route and to take full advantage

00:35:57.280 of it and not to try to take prisoners so one prepped the general don't take prisoners two created a

00:36:05.040 small squad of the gunners to stay loaded and have the troops know that this squad existed to shoot

00:36:09.840 anyone who's running for the loot so we were able to maintain discipline in that we got the really high

00:36:14.640 casualty rate we were looking for and people expected oh you're going to take the disputed

00:36:18.640 territory back and i was like no because they've had time to fortify there what we should be doing

00:36:22.720 is going to the castle because we have gunpowder and they don't expect us to have gunpowder in this age

00:36:27.440 so they're like okay we go to the castle how do we deal with the walls right because this world does have

00:36:33.200 some magic so even if i had sappers run in and try to put explosives under the walls they'd be spotted

00:36:38.320 and they'd be taken out or that's what i was told because you know i asked the ai okay what would

00:36:41.840 happen if i tried this what would happen if i tried this so then instead what i tried to do

00:36:46.640 is i you know there's fire mages in this world and i asked well could they shoot anything high in

00:36:51.520 the sky and they were like well no they can't shoot anything more than two like 100 feet in the sky

00:36:55.280 but and i was like in in the the mage i was talking to thought i was going to try to lob the

00:37:00.160 explosives at them and i was like no we're not going to do that what we're going to do is use our

00:37:04.160 fire mages to create hot air balloons and because the city before i had asked it for like

00:37:08.640 the the environment of the city was an inland city so we can attack it from any angle we just

00:37:13.760 set up the hot air balloons upwind of the city how the fire balloons uh hot air balloons go over

00:37:19.360 the city drop explosives on any important infrastructure that we can see and then in the confusion to

00:37:25.200 that because if we had dropped explosives on the walls from above it wouldn't do that much damage

00:37:29.200 we cast a barrage spell and then had the sappers come in and take out a section of wall now here

00:37:35.280 what i was really afraid of is that they would do what you would do in a normal medieval war

00:37:38.880 which is go fight civilians loot the area and mostly let the royal palace survive i said no

00:37:47.760 you need to have an elite squad that goes in first anyone who deviates in this squad ends up being

00:37:54.320 killed their job is to leave all civilians alone everything else alone go straight for the castle 0.99

00:38:01.280 and they need to kill the entire royal line we need we need everyone in the world line dead because you 0.99

00:38:07.920 know when you're taking a territory like this historically if you do not absolutely wipe out 0.96

00:38:12.480 the world line then you're going to get the international court basically together at this

00:38:15.600 time and somebody's going to be like well they technically have claim here they technically have

00:38:18.480 claim here didn't want any sort of compromise but then i wanted to make sure that this was

00:38:22.320 internationally approved so i also had them go and look for a high-powered family in a one of our

00:38:28.560 most powerful neighboring countries to put them as the governess or governor of this territory this was 0.98

00:38:37.680 done to increase the chance that a large neighboring country would validate this territorial acquisition

00:38:43.600 making it easier to normalize on the international stage they did but they made the mistake of choosing

00:38:49.760 one of the lower age rank princesses of one of the most powerful countries i was like well you know

00:38:54.560 if she ends up inheriting the shirk throne then she'll likely take the territory with her so she 1.00

00:38:59.120 needs to publicly give up her right of ascension right now what we're working on is building out 0.92

00:39:05.440 because we've been working on railroad technology because it's a fairly simple technology that i remember

00:39:09.200 the gist of to build railroad networks between our kingdom and their kingdom as well as the neighboring

00:39:17.680 kingdom which provided the princess for this project and we're going to try to use that to

00:39:23.360 build closer connections between the two and lower the chance of revolt by improving the local economy

00:39:28.160 of all three regions if you're like oh that sounds really cool i want to learn how to play one of those

00:39:33.200 you know you see the links that i've provided here just some notes on how to use these whenever

00:39:37.440 you're describing an action that you're doing or something that's happening in the scenario put it in

00:39:41.680 brackets you can also use this brackets technique to skip time so if some event in the future is

00:39:47.200 being talked about within a strain of text you can put like brackets we walked into the house you

00:39:51.600 know because they're like oh why don't you come to my house a few days later and then brackets

00:39:55.200 walking into house with x person y person and z person or suppose you're in the haven one with the

00:40:00.400 drone and the drone's like i see footprints and you can put brackets we arrive at the source of the

00:40:05.680 footprints describe or something like that you can also sometimes if you want to cheat use brackets to

00:40:11.440 change what other people in the scenario are thinking you know in brackets x person thinks x or x

00:40:17.280 person thinks y you can regenerate text if it does something that you don't love while also deleting it

00:40:23.440 this is important if it misunderstands something or you miswrote something you do this by right

00:40:28.400 clicking on the text and you'll get a regenerate button made some janitor ai versions of these as well

00:40:33.360 janitor ai is slightly lower quality ai than sakura but you can use it longer for free and it's

00:40:41.120 much less likely to steer a conversation in a pc direction let's say for example i've had some

00:40:46.960 major problems with sakura and getting the drone that follows you around to be okay with you killing

00:40:52.480 random people even though it's supposed to be part of this world it always goes on politicizing about

00:40:57.360 how you you shouldn't be killing random people in this post-apocalyptic world also i'll note here

00:41:03.040 sometimes whichever one of these models you're using before you do something if you want to talk to

00:41:07.520 a specific person you will need to put that person's name in brackets and say speaking to x and then

00:41:13.360 what you want to say or it might mistake it is just oh he's talking to whoever um or whoever it

00:41:20.160 thinks is like the narrator like it's almost like a dream that you have perfect control over which is

00:41:28.160 absolutely awesome um and people are like well you're not experiencing it like a dream and it's like

00:41:33.520 well the thing it reminds me most of is when i was little my brother and i used to play this thing

00:41:37.600 we called the game and what the game was is both of us would just like make up a scenario like oh

00:41:43.360 we're fighting like the aliens are attacking and we're shooting at them and then the next person would

00:41:48.800 build on that but like you can do that with this because you can you can both talk in the system but

00:41:53.200 you can also put in brackets to make things happen right so again you could start with like that first

00:41:57.440 scene and then like in brackets like zerglings break through the stained glass windows of the 0.79

00:42:03.040 chapel the city is under attack by a full alien plague and then it's like you know you've just

00:42:08.400 gone in a completely different direction oh my goodness i do have two bones to pick additionally

00:42:14.240 with the analysis of ai dating assistants which is one absolutely emotional connections form which

00:42:20.640 is apparent in the issue of the many teens who talk about breaking up with their ai boyfriends and

00:42:26.800 being you know completely shook up by it or struggling to quit it and and literally failing

00:42:33.200 their classes because they can't stop playing with these these games these these stories these narratives

00:42:40.720 two i actually don't think this is a very accurate way of modeling people and i don't think it's for

00:42:47.040 the reason that this is given that oh ai can't handle the complexities of humans no i think the issue

00:42:54.560 is that these ais are designed to create regular and steady dopamine hits they are even if you ask it

00:43:04.720 to build a fairly boring or straightforward or basic character they're going to create

00:43:10.560 narratively rich responses to your prompts because that is how you stay hooked and that is

00:43:14.960 what reinforcement learning is all about it's about giving maximally satisfying responses you have 0.96

00:43:20.000 human dating partners no no they do that you can make it you can make them dumb you can make them 0.86

00:43:25.440 sundry yes but the way that they respond is still going to be maximally entertaining to you

00:43:30.640 and my argument is that basic humans and people that you date are intensely boring what is one of the

00:43:39.840 most common conversations you've ever had with pretty much anyone what do you want to do right now

00:43:43.920 where do you want to go i don't know where do you want to go this is no hold on you think that ai chat

00:43:49.680 bots don't sometimes end up in that exact same scenario or where do you want to go and the ai will

00:43:54.800 be like oh where do you want to go it absolutely does do that i don't know i feel but i do think that

00:44:02.320 these these systems are more designed for yes and and especially young teenage dating partners are not

00:44:08.880 they're not good conversational partners they're not stimulating they're not modeling you and trying

00:44:14.400 to create maximally entertaining responses for you and this ai stuff is so i think a big problem with

00:44:19.760 this is if we train our kids for example on ai chat bots they are going to be so disappointed in humans

00:44:28.080 so disappointed i think it's it's the it's the female equivalent or narrative equivalent to

00:44:33.920 online erotic material where there's of course this outrage i think it's overblown where everyone

00:44:41.440 is like young men expect their girlfriends to act like porn stars when they just can't but i think here

00:44:49.760 we're going to have young women and young men at expecting in the absence of any sexual activity

00:44:56.560 their partners to behave like romance novel partners and they're not going to and that's a problem

00:45:03.280 i disagree with you i think you're saying this because you haven't interacted with these systems

00:45:07.040 and i'm going to encourage our fans to try to create models okay um no no no both for male and

00:45:14.960 female dating okay send them to us and we will one pin them in the the the general comment section here 1.00

00:45:22.720 but two i want to do a future episode where each of us takes a crack at trying to get one of these

00:45:30.960 models on a date like what would we do on a date with one of these models and we can see if you

00:45:36.880 can try to make a boring one right like a boring model but i also want to make challenging models

00:45:41.280 stuff like that right like but realistic not a model that just absolutely hates the person that

00:45:45.840 they're interacting with so create some interesting models let's test them and give like a few default

00:45:52.160 models that i would recommend to people by doing tests with them on a future episode because i think

00:45:56.800 that would be really interesting all right tasting ai dating coaches tasting that would be really

00:46:04.480 good not in this form of dating coach but like actual ai dating simulations

00:46:10.640 that would be a lot of fun you could you could create very accurate with some of these systems

00:46:15.200 simones or malcolms

00:46:19.040 probably we do like to make ourselves as two-dimensional as possible

00:46:22.800 yeah it's capable of doing a lot more than that so should be easy all right love you simone i love

00:46:29.200 you too gorgeous i can't wait until we're giving our kids dating advice we're going to be the tiger moms 0.97

00:46:38.560 of dating we're going to be weird tiger mom pickup artists criticizing our kids game 0.99

00:46:45.840 that was terrible try again you went on four dates this week what is what is are you even trying

00:46:56.240 we'll get started here okay let's do it please like and subscribe and if you are working on any ai

00:47:02.560 projects and looking for a data center for training also let me know because i'm working

00:47:06.800 on a project i'm making that lower cost right now as well

00:47:17.200 you

Based Camp - August 15, 2024

Malcolm Vs. AI Malcolm： Dating Advice

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