Shock Study： Psychologists (+Far Left) Turn Teens Against Parents (& Destroy Their Mental Health)
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Summary
In this episode, we talk about a recent study from the University of California, Los Angeles, on the effects of Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) on teen emotional well-being, and why it might not be as good as we think it is.
Transcript
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The main findings, DBT intervention did not improve outcomes.
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Significant deteriorations were observed across outcomes immediately.
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Largest deteriorations were seen in depressive symptoms.
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If you really need the help, it makes things even worse.
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Teen participants continued to report significantly poorer quality of parent-child relationships,
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And I think that comes down to the way in which this kind of behavior can irreparably
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recontextualize the way that you see your relationship.
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And I think it's really hard to fix that damage.
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They try to convince you that your primary support network is being abusive to you.
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And your primary support network is usually your parents or your birth culture.
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No matter what you've been told by your husband, your father, not really, mother.
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This ultra urban monoculture is what we historically would have recognized as a cult.
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The clue that is the holy guide to living pure.
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You sent a study to me that absolutely shocked me.
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And I really want to go over the results of it because I think it is terrifying.
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But also, pretty definitive proof of your claim that one of the primary means by which
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the urban monoculture spreads is through therapy culture and that it uses therapy culture
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primarily to alienate young people from their support networks.
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And leading to these absolutely horrible, we did another episode recently showing that
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one in ten kids in school right now has thought about unaliving themselves this past year.
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The percent that made a plan to unalive themselves, 24% among young women, 12% among young men.
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The ones who seriously considered attempting it, 30% young women, 14% young men.
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The feeling persistent sadness, 57% of young women, 29% of young men.
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So what is happening in schools right now is not working.
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And a big part of this is the infiltration of, as I have always said, modern psychology has
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What you get if you go into a modern psychologist today is much closer to what Scientology was
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doing with people in the 90s than what would happen if you saw a psychologist in the 90s.
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And I'm not saying all psychologists fall into this, but the ones that are influencing
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So what was the name of the study again, Simone?
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The study is called Investigating the Efficacy of a Dialectical Behavior Therapy-Based Universal
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Intervention on Adolescent Social and Emotional Well-Being Outcomes.
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That's a mouthful, but they're basically like, does DBT help teens?
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So this is a AI summary of what the study ended up showing and the way the study was constructed,
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which I'm guessing is probably what you were going to read.
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AI explains it in plainer English, how it is with these academic studies that like decide
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I love how much they buried the lead with the title of this study because the results are
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It could be one of those instances in which they primarily did this research to try to
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show how good and effective DBT was, and then it turned out to really hurt.
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So they had to obfuscate things in the wording just so that, you know, the people who funded
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it didn't get super offended and never fund them again.
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I think that's more probably what's going on here.
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It was a non-randomized controlled trial, which is pretty good.
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It had over a thousand participants, pretty well split on gender.
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The intervention group had 563 participants and eight sessions of a wise teens program.
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We'll be talking about this group in a second that you did the DBT and the control group
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Just so people know what this means from like a science perspective, it means that the results
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Not something where you can be like, oh, the sample size was small or it wasn't controlled
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The main findings, the wise teens intervention did not improve outcomes overall.
00:05:04.960
Significant deteriorations were observed across outcomes immediately post-
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Largest deteriorations were seen in depressive symptoms.
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If you really need the help, it makes things even worse.
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I remember how I was showing like the rate of depression going up in young kids.
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And yet we're seeing more and more like DBT therapy being put on these otherwise mentally
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But while most group differences dissipated at follow-up, if you can get out of the therapy
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culture, but if the kids get roped in and they end up building a trauma dependency on
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a therapist, a lot of therapy culture today is about trying to incept people with the idea
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Where they would try to get you to believe that like something in your use created the
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thing that you couldn't get away from and that you needed to keep seeing them to create
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But the thing that didn't disappear, okay, was wise teen participants continue to report
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significantly poorer quality of parent-child relationships, specifically mother relationships.
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And I think that comes down to the way in which this kind of behavior can irreparably
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recontextualize the way that you see your relationship.
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And I think it's really hard to fix that damage.
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It's one thing to, oh, you're framing or you're ruminating on something.
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I think therapy can, when presented the wrong way, especially when not really outcome oriented
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or fixing things oriented CBT, really get you to ruminate on the bad thing and identify
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And if you start living life and getting distracted, you can get over that.
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So if you stop the therapy, you can get better.
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But once you recontextualize a relationship or you start to reframe something that happened
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in the past as traumatic, whereas you didn't view it as traumatic before, undoing that really
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They try to convince you that your primary support network is being abusive to you.
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And your primary support network is usually your parents or your birth culture, i.e.
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And so a core tactic of the urban monoculture, which is essentially a cult, is to use emissaries
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that basically it's preacher cast are the psychologists and social workers, because they're the ones
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who recruit new members and ensure that people don't defect, they first to get you into it.
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It's just the iterations of this culture, because it has almost no kids itself, that were able
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to convince people that they had abusive relationships from their primary support network
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and birth culture were better at growing than the ones that didn't adopt these tactics.
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Because most people, if they deconvert from their birth culture, it happens between 15 to
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So it makes a sense to try to get this stuff into schools from the perspective of the
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Like you would expect after a large study, like this sort of thing would be shut down.
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So you can look at, and that's what social emotional learning is, which really should have
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And we'll do a whole other episode on social emotional learning.
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The problem is, it's such a deep rabbit hole, because it really is.
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You can look at James Lindsay has talked about this a lot, and he has done some great research
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We had talked about having him on the show at one point, but I don't know if we ever got
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But basically, it's not like a vague cult or an accidentally evolved cult.
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And it is, yet you can see from the downstream effects that we're seeing in the people that
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it's converting, because the communities where it is most widespread are often like LGBT
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And if you look at things like, here's the statistic right here, 70% of LGBTQ plus students
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experience persistent feelings of sadness and hopelessness.
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And the unaliving attempts in that community, 20% every year are attempting.
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Like it is really bad in the communities that it has most deeply penetrated, because it often,
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What is a sign of the urban monoculture but the colonizer's flag?
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And for people to know what the colonizer's flag, it was named in our Discord, and I absolutely
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love this, where they took the gay pride flag, which literally meant everyone under the rainbow.
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It wasn't like the colors meant specific things.
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And then they started covering it up with specific groups, absolutely animal farming it.
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And now they put it on every institution that the urban monoculture has conquered, like
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bull baiting towards the LGBT community, anger.
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And it's wild that they're doing this, because they control pretty much every institution of
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Why do they need to have a minority group targeted for their actions?
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But let's talk about what this wise group that's causing all these negative effects, it's
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If you go to their website, and I'll put this on stage, this is front and center.
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When it comes to prevention, our mantra is early and often.
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This harmful thing that we know is causing a breakdown of familial relationships, their
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We know it's causing negative mental health outcomes in a place where this is already a
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crisis, increasing rates of depression early and often, and increasing them among the
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You can look at something like 70% of LGBTQ students, which is the group that the urban
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monoculture is most represented in, and this therapy culture is most represented in, experience
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persistent feelings of sadness and unhappiness.
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This is going up as their level of oppression is going down, but as the level of infiltration
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of their culture is going up by the urban monoculture.
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And 20% of them have attempted unaliving themselves year over year.
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And then if you look at what they are pushing out, what does WISE do?
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It does this both with just general urban monoculture conversion.
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You can see this through their words of things like the WISE elementary school program builds
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blah, blah, blah, protective skills of empathy and safety.
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Like, what do they mean by empathy and safety, right?
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Like they mean that they are medicalizing and therapizing normal human child interaction because
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of what's good for pulling kids out of their birth culture.
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That's why they're doing this, even though we know it hurts now.
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Because they built a bureaucracy and the bureaucracy is self-reinforcing.
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Kids who get sucked into this culture find it very hard to get out of it once you're in
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Once you've broken their relationships with their support network, that's why cults do that.
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Let's talk about dialectical behavioral therapy for a second.
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It's an evidence-based psychotherapy that was originally developed to treat borderline
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personality disorder, but has since been adopted to address various mental health conditions.
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In this context, DBT is a structured form of therapy that combines elements of cognitive
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behavioral therapy with concepts of mindfulness, distress tolerance, and emotional regulation.
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DBT typically involves group sessions focused on teaching four core skills.
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Again, mindfulness, distress tolerance, interpersonal effectiveness, and emotional regulation.
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However, when they say emotional regulation, they actually mean the exact opposite of emotional
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I think when they teach mindfulness, instead they're teaching rumination and identification
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DBT teaches the function and importance of emotions, helping clients see them as valid and
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you should experience all the emotions that your body outputs.
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It's very much like a lot of people think the inside out is this like totally non-threatening
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It is therapy, culture, cartoonized and given to kids.
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It treats all of their emotions as in many ways equally valid.
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And you need this balanced emotional landscape where sometimes you're angry and sometimes
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you're sad and all of the emotions play a role.
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And I actually heard this when I was talking to my old school and they're trying to get
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They're like, inside out really taught us this.
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As from like the studies, like if you allow yourself to succumb to an emotion like anger,
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like if you go and punch a wall after getting angry, your level of anger actually rises in
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the probability that you feel that in the future rises.
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If you allow yourself to feel really any negative emotional state, one decreases your ability
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to inhibit those states in the future, allowing them to spiral out of control.
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This is how you get like anxiety spirals and stuff like that.
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And why we're seeing this explosion in anxiety, that and the removal of corporal punishment,
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the removal of negative stimuli discipline for kids.
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Because when you don't experience negative stimuli, you become hypersensitized to it.
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And then you need things like trigger warnings, which we've talked about before, which creates
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But when you teach kids, oh, just experience all your emotions, like this is not what the
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What the data says is you should treat your brain like a fascist landscape where your logic
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controls your emotions because your logic can control your emotions.
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You can largely control what you feel through the narratives you create about how you interact
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So what else does it teach when it's teaching like emotional control?
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Practicing awareness of the present moment without judgment helps observing and experiencing
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This observing and experiencing emotions is the very last thing you want to do.
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And if your brain is a democracy, if you have logic as one tiny voice in your brain and all
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the emotions are these very loud voices in your brain, you're going to spiral into negative
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mental health outcomes because these emotions were evolved within a very different social
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Basically, the emotions that we feel, both positive and negatives, are just the things that
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our ancestors, when they felt them, they had more surviving offspring.
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And if you succumb to those, if you're like, oh, I'll just let those guide me, like those
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And we'll have like counsel where the logic is like one member and then we have anger and
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And you're taking an average of opinions that you're going to be making catastrophically stupid
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And these decisions will then cause more negative emotional output, which causes a spiral.
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And then they break the relationship with your family and birth culture by saying, oh, that
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caused trauma, all these things that they did were trauma causing, like discipline, as we
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say, like corporal discipline, which we know from the data is good.
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You can look at the study, don't show the baby out with the bass water, parental punishment.
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And it showed that when you actually match it, it does help with mental health outcomes.
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They could have told you that the earlier results were manipulated, but they didn't.
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They don't, just in case people are wondering how they're manipulated, I'll just say it really
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quickly, although watch for the virtual will know this.
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So they would take a family like ours where our daughter doesn't get corporal punishment
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They put her in the no punishment group and they put our sons in the punishment group
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and then say, see the punishment group's acting out more.
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And it's like, that is astronomically stupid that you did that.
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They really benefit from these negative mental health effects because when you create these
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negative mental health spirals in young teens and you've broken them off from their
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birth culture, you've broken them off from their parents, what else are they going to
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And that's what, when you, when anyone can identify, for example, as non-binary and then
00:16:28.260
enter the queer community, which is one of the things we complain about, when anyone can
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identify as non-binary and enter the queer community, and then you get loved bombed for
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Or for example, us, we would be considered trans within the modern context, right?
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Because I don't particularly care what my gender is.
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If I broke up to her a different gender, I'd figure out a way to make it work.
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And that would be called agender, which is a form of genderqueer, which is a form of
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They have expanded the definitions of all this, or demisexual, they would say, which
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actually is the standard sexual presentation among women.
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And yet they treat it like it's a form of being queer.
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For people who aren't inducted into the insane leftist cult, demisexual means that you usually
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only feel sexually aroused when you already have an emotional attachment to somebody.
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And it's like, yeah, normal female sexuality works that way.
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Yeah, some women are outside of that, but mostly for most women, that's how sexual, but now
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they're saying that means most women are queer.
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So queer identification is not seen to me when you're looking at, and when I'm looking
00:17:27.320
at statistics, it's primarily a sign of something like same-sex attraction or even a real trans
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It's more of an identification of being a member of this extremist cult.
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And we're seeing the negative mental health outcomes with one in five of them trying to
00:17:43.240
unalive themselves every year, who are adolescent people in this community, 70% having this intense
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It comes around with this, we will affirm you, we will affirm you, we will protect you
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We will protect you from negative stimuli, sort of candy cart.
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And so you go when you're in this intense state of emotional insecurity and self-questioning
00:18:10.700
and a poor mental health that's created by these sorts of programs, and then it can use
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that to snatch you up because you've been disconnected from all of your classic support
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Because the classic support networks are going to tell you what you need to hear, which
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You should not learn to love yourself as you are.
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You should be pressured to become the type of person worthy of you loving.
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But that in the moment, that isn't cotton candy.
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So I'd love to hear your thoughts on this, Simone.
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And I'm disturbed by how much good and responsible sounding language is presented to people like
00:18:54.520
parents who are genuinely concerned about their kids' well-being and how their really well-meaning
00:19:00.140
attempts are backfiring and causing them to lose their children even more.
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It breaks my heart that a parent that is doing everything they can to help their kids, who
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really cares and who really does want to help them, is ultimately doing so much worse for
00:19:15.680
their kids' outcome than a parent who is actively negligent and who actively doesn't care.
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It shouldn't be the case in modern society that literally neglectful parents are going
00:19:25.740
to see better mental health outcomes for their children.
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It's no wonder that people who are more affluent and educated and have all these resources and
00:19:33.540
who like really care about getting their kids right are terrified of becoming parents because
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when you look at the outcomes of their kids and the kids of their peers, they are worse.
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And I don't think they realize that a lot of it's because of their culture and they're probably
00:19:48.280
thinking, oh, neglectful, irresponsible parents are probably seeing something even worse.
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It would be really interesting to see that divide.
00:19:55.700
I just listened to that one YouTuber's really long piece on the other pro-natalist Collins
00:20:01.800
family and they actively don't do a lot of things to take care of their kids.
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Like they may not take their kids to the doctor a whole lot.
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They certainly don't send their kids to therapy as far as I'm aware, but I could reckon that
00:20:15.300
their kids are probably mentally a lot healthier than kids who are getting tons and tons of
00:20:19.240
resources as their critics would argue they should be doing.
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There was this like, obviously completely brainwashed by the cult young gen alpha gen Z YouTuber.
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I was watching who was complaining that mental health outcomes keep getting worse.
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And she is, we can fix this by getting more psychologists that are cheap.
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I think it's a very complex conversation as to why gen Z is not wanting to have kids because
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it doesn't just pertain to financial issues or inflation eating out our arses clean.
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But gen Z has a rampant problem with mental health issues that have gone long unaddressed,
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mostly for the reason being that the mental health system is largely lacking.
00:21:05.080
For example, I am still on a wait list to see a psychologist.
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I can't even remember the last time that I even followed up on that.
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Because the last time I did, I remember calling the psychologist and he's on the phone like,
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well, I'm actually leaving for holidays next week.
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I saved the day in my phone and everything like that.
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So a week later, I called them again and I was like, hey, just following up, blah, blah, blah.
00:21:38.960
Well, actually, no, we don't have any appointments available until mid-December.
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What are you, there are more youth psychologists today, more psychologizing was in school than
00:21:52.820
Do you think this stuff existed in the old west?
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Do you think that in the greatest generation or in our parents' generation, when they were
00:21:58.480
objectively, we can look at the data, had better mental health outcomes, that they were not
00:22:02.820
being exposed to this, that when you get in this cult, you see the mental health problems
00:22:07.980
that are downstream of these sorts of mechanisms.
00:22:14.060
Now, if you're here and you're a parent or you are a person who is struggling with a mental
00:22:19.180
health outcome, I used to say that CBT at least still worked.
00:22:24.240
I think it's been so infiltrated and twisted that it doesn't really work that well anymore.
00:22:29.140
Or maybe what we were exposed to is CBT, like you when you studied psychology in school and
00:22:33.940
me when I went through it, is basically an extinct strain of it.
00:22:38.160
And now what is happening is totally different.
00:22:41.360
So what I would recommend people do if they are like, what's the alternative is the
00:22:47.540
The first book we wrote, I wrote it as an alternative to CBT, actually.
00:22:51.360
If you read it, you'll notice a lot of if-then functions, basically.
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It was really meant as a user manual for a type of psychologist that we were eventually
00:22:59.540
going to spin out, but we just never really got around to it.
00:23:02.780
We got in with our company right now, blah, blah, blah.
00:23:05.000
But it's still very usable from an individual perspective.
00:23:08.540
And it focuses on a completely different mechanism for therapy.
00:23:13.000
Essentially, the mechanism is determine what you think has value in life.
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And we go through all the various things that somebody might think has value in life.
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And then using those set of things you think have value in life, how do you maximize those
00:23:26.340
And then develop a conscious system from doing that.
00:23:28.820
And then here's all these mental hacks you can use for controlling the way that your brain
00:23:33.360
outputs emotion and to give you more mastery over your emotional states.
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And I think that that's one of the problems is when we say like the things that you think
00:23:43.640
have value, we call this your objective function.
00:23:45.560
And the problem with the urban monoculture is that it doesn't have an objective function
00:23:49.900
for many people other than reduce the amount of suffering that anyone's experiencing in
00:23:54.440
And because of that, and because people recognize that isn't a thing of actual value, it leads
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to these really terrible mental health outcomes.
00:24:02.380
Another thing I would want to point out when people are like, oh, you shouldn't be dismissing
00:24:06.080
We have a whole episode on this topic, but there's a great study done on trauma.
00:24:10.140
And I really just need to beat this because this is an important thing that the general
00:24:13.860
It looked at correlations between reported trauma in childhood and negative mental health
00:24:22.260
Then it tried to correlate reported trauma with actual documentable trauma, looking at court
00:24:28.800
And it found that there was almost no correlation.
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In other words, contextualization is everything.
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And if you believe that you've been subject to trauma and identify as someone who has been
00:24:42.400
It doesn't really matter what actually happened to you.
00:24:47.280
If you have PTSD that is real, by the way, not the, not the, I've self-diagnosed with PTSD
00:24:52.820
or I tripped on the way to a store and I have PTSD now, but that doesn't count.
00:24:58.760
But there are some like real mechanical things that can go wrong.
00:25:01.660
And also there's depression that is real and mechanical and that can be triggered by
00:25:09.560
And I am afraid for when we have an instance of a kid who is actually depressed, who probably
00:25:15.520
needs some form of chemical intervention that we can only get from a psychologist because
00:25:25.760
And as we explained in the Pragmatist Guide to Life, sometimes you actually do need-
00:25:34.140
So my parents used to do this with me as a kid.
00:25:38.560
No, there's therapists who don't prescribe and then there's psychologists who do.
00:25:53.380
I was on the pathway to become a psychologist and not a psychiatrist.
00:25:56.780
And I thought about changing career trajectories to become a psychiatrist, but it's a different
00:26:03.040
So anyway, so this is coming from somebody who knows a great deal about all of this, but
00:26:10.860
I am not coming to you here as an anti-mental health person.
00:26:15.500
I am coming to you here saying that there used to be a functioning mental health system
00:26:19.160
in the West and it doesn't exist anymore and it is just a danger now.
00:26:23.160
And what my parents used to do as me, which is what we do as our kids, is warn them against
00:26:27.940
these individuals, warn them that these individuals will try to manipulate them into joining these
00:26:33.780
And that they, this is what you say to them to get the meds you need, basically, because
00:26:42.220
And when people are like, oh, you shouldn't go so far as to call it a cult, like the urban
00:26:50.000
I want you to consider the language I've been reading here recently.
00:26:53.720
And I'm going to play some scenes from a King of the Hill episode about what cults are,
00:27:00.980
And I think you will see very quickly, Omega House is Luann's sorority.
00:27:05.860
What I'm babbling about is how the Omega cult recruits unsuspecting young women from
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00:27:09.800
campus, deprives them of protein, bathrooms, and all contact with their families and friends,
00:27:15.000
then ships them off to a ranch for general enslavement.
00:27:25.380
In this part, I would call your attention to the name changes, which is a very common tactic
00:27:30.620
in cults, to have people adopt new names and new identities, as well as unique titles,
00:27:38.440
Cults do this for a few reasons, but probably the biggest is it's really powerful at separating
00:27:43.260
people from their existing support networks, because when their support networks regard
00:27:47.900
these individuals by their old identities, the cult will say, like, well, that's an attack
00:27:56.840
And through that, they're able to prevent these people from being able to reconcile as easily
00:28:02.900
or have as fluid conversations with their natural support network.
00:28:07.600
It also makes it very hard for these individuals to talk to people who aren't indoctrinated into
00:28:14.280
the cult's ways, and therefore don't know how to talk to them within this very narrow and
00:28:20.000
from a mainstream societal perspective, bizarre rule set, which is unique to the cult itself.
00:28:25.420
Peggy, Luann, it's me, your husband, and your uncle.
00:28:31.540
You're thinking of blonde Jane and old Jane, and they don't want to see you.
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00:28:35.420
Another common cult tactic to look out for is any group that shames individuals for eating
00:28:43.560
Through denying people the, well, the regular resources that the human brain needs to stay
00:28:49.300
sharp, it's very easy to cloud an individual's mind and convince them of absurd things.
00:28:56.860
They've been deprived of protein so long that their bodies are feeding off their own brains.
00:29:01.220
They're nothing but soulless autonomatonamatons.
00:29:04.040
I'd also really encourage people, if a loved one, a parent, a sibling, tells you you have
00:29:11.460
joined a cult, or they think that you have joined a group that is acting like a cult, and
00:29:16.580
this is not an accusation that they've made to you before.
00:29:19.460
Or, like, okay, maybe you have a sibling or a parent that just says everything's a cult,
00:29:26.440
But if you have one who has not said this to you before, or even worse, if they have
00:29:32.620
said it to you before, and on reflection you realized after leaving that group that it
00:29:37.180
actually was displaying cult-like behavior, please, please take that seriously.
00:29:42.060
Parents and siblings don't just drop this accusation out of the blue.
00:29:44.960
If they say that you've been brainwashed, or that you're being manipulated, please take
00:29:53.080
It's parents yelling at their kids, you are being brainwashed, you are being brainwashed,
00:29:57.340
and the kids thinking that the parents are just out of touch.
00:30:16.680
The more times you hear a group use terms like love, validation, acceptance, belonging,
00:30:25.120
especially when they twist these words to mean things that they historically didn't mean,
00:30:30.640
you know, like in this scene, they call it a love fence.
00:30:34.460
That is high red blaring signs that you are dealing with a cult.
00:30:40.000
Cults always coat their actions in this facade of love, and particularly unity, because unity
00:30:49.480
can be used as a concept to stamp out dissenting thought.
00:30:53.800
My new friends have invited me to spend eternity, I think, with them.
00:31:22.280
Next scene will show how cults often recruit people.
00:31:25.940
And it's very important to look for these actions in the organizations that you are interacting with.
00:31:31.160
First, you'll note love and unity are going to be two of the core values that a cult will
00:31:37.260
always put out, because unity allows them to silence dissent as a concept, and also it
00:31:44.460
often means, you know, unity under the accepted authority or hierarchy of the group.
00:31:49.800
If you're talking about the urban monoculture, this might be a gender or ethnic-based authority,
00:31:55.020
but in more traditional cults, it'll just be a generic hierarchy.
00:31:59.800
Another thing that you'll see very frequently is love bombing, and it's a very important
1.00
00:32:05.300
This will often happen if you see, like, a group of people in a circle, and they're all
00:32:10.300
just constantly affirming someone, you know, telling them how great the decisions they're
00:32:14.680
making are, how great what they're doing is, how great they are as a person, especially
00:32:19.500
if they're doing this while looking for ways that they can create divisions between this
00:32:25.720
individual and their traditional support network, like their family, that is almost certainly
00:32:31.260
Even if it wasn't, like, created as a cult, as we've mentioned in other episodes, like,
00:32:37.160
It just, a cult-like behavior, if it is protected from criticism, begins to self-replicate, and
00:32:46.320
in society where we have certain groups that, you know, I think may need legitimate protection,
00:32:52.160
like the trans community, unfortunately, within far progressive circles, any accusation of,
00:32:57.580
oh, you're doing something wrong here, you're doing something bad here, is unallowed if it's
00:33:03.200
So, the negative behavioral traits weren't able to be called out, and it basically evolved
00:33:09.820
a organically formed cult with most of the behavior patterns that you see in other cults,
00:33:19.360
As an organization that promotes love and unity, Omega House appreciates a mother as caring as
00:33:26.820
I wish I could jump in your head and crawl around.
00:33:36.820
It's difficult to find people you can really connect with.
00:33:39.960
People of high intellect often intimidate people.
00:33:46.480
No matter what you've been told by your husband.
00:34:02.560
My hobbies, favorite movies, my deep-seated resentment towards my soul-crushing mother.
00:34:11.140
I should have known, yeah, this ultra-urban monoculture is what we historically would have
00:34:21.400
One joke I remembered, and I have constantly tried to find this.
00:34:25.420
So I am done because I've asked AI and I can't find it, and maybe somebody in the comments
00:34:32.380
It was from Bubble Boy, and you'll get to see it.
00:34:35.780
And it even includes the name change that I mentioned before.
00:34:41.700
Any group where people start changing their names, watch out, buddy.
00:34:45.780
But I remember a scene where a bunch of people were on the bus, and the cult members
00:34:50.800
had their genitals removed, because that was seen as a joke thing that a lot of cults
0.93
00:34:54.280
did, is that the cult members would have themselves castrated.
0.99
00:34:57.560
And that was seen as like a sign that you would join a cult.
00:35:00.480
Or the types of wording that I will put from the King of the Hill episode, that would be
00:35:04.600
seen as like a sign that you would join a cult.
00:35:06.760
And you should know when a group's talking like that, stay away from them, stay away
00:35:11.540
The clue that is the holy guide to living pure.
00:35:15.480
First, we prepare our souls by stripping ourselves of all sexual desires.
00:35:46.600
They don't know, oh, there's this weird vegetarian group that tells me to hate my parents, and
00:35:52.920
They say that they're all about love and caring, and that they're the people who really care
00:36:07.760
We've entered Clown World Timeline, and it's different.
00:36:19.800
Oh, by the way, anyone who's here is like, you're just trying to shill your book.
00:36:22.740
Our book is owned by a nonprofit and costs 99 cents in its e-book form.
00:36:26.300
And in its physical form, we have it literally the lowest margin.
00:36:35.260
And if you literally don't have 99 cents to spend on the book, just email us at partners
00:36:40.260
at pragmatistfoundation.com, and you'll get it for free.
00:36:46.940
The more positive reviews we get, the more that we can get it in the Amazon algorithm,
00:36:52.260
But Simone, I want to end with saying that the fans keep saying they want to hear you
00:37:04.360
And I will explain that the audience thinks that I'm the mastermind or thinks that I'm
00:37:10.020
And I once read this book when I was a kid that was all about how to do corporate power
00:37:15.760
plays in the political world as a manly man who has wide shoulders.
00:37:21.080
And one of the big power plays was to basically never speak and just to look unimpressed and
00:37:33.740
I just really think that what Malcolm has to say is far more interesting.
00:37:38.600
The role that I play in our relationship is I ask them questions.
00:37:41.540
And then often when Malcolm tries to explain herself himself or clarify what he's trying
00:37:45.620
to say, then he ends up coming up with some new idea that's even better.
00:37:49.860
Use my techniques and I don't care who you're negotiating against, you'll win.
00:37:55.900
You're going to wear dark colors with a single power accent.
00:37:59.420
Every hair in place, hair movement is a sign of weakness.
00:38:06.860
90% of negotiations are lost by the person who speaks first.
00:38:21.200
So you've lost the initiative, perhaps by being a woman or a shorter man.
00:38:25.420
But you can regain it by fighting on your home turf.
00:38:29.120
I thought you might do that, which is why I'm going to be the first person to do power quiet
1.00
00:38:33.060
talking, forcing you to lean in and wonder if you're missing any key phrases, like an idiot.
0.99
00:38:38.280
I thought you'd try power quiet talking, which is why I'm wearing a hearing aid.
1.00
00:38:44.660
So I do help him come up with better ideas and I do play an important role in the ideas
0.95
00:38:48.820
that we jointly generate, but it's only by asking dumb questions.
0.86
00:38:52.500
So don't let the fact that I don't speak a lot make you think that I am somehow this puppet
0.96
00:38:57.660
master or this mastermind or this very smart person.
00:39:01.100
It's just because when you don't hear someone talk, it's a whole lot easier to pedestalize
00:39:05.640
It's a whole lot easier to assume that they're going to say something smart.
00:39:08.600
And then as soon as they open their mouths, they expose themselves to criticism.
00:39:12.040
They expose themselves to any sort of scrutiny that's going to reveal that they're imperfect.
00:39:21.660
And I would say everyone who chooses to criticize you, Malcolm, for your whatever out there views
00:39:29.680
or be like, but this and then, and you missed this, or you're wrong about that.
1.00
00:39:34.000
And why don't you publish something yourself online?
1.00
00:39:40.560
The people who have the balls to even leave a comment are doing something amazing, but just
00:39:44.580
keep in mind that so few people are willing to expose themselves to any scrutiny.
00:39:48.300
Most of the people who do bother to publish something online and expose themselves to
00:39:52.320
scrutiny are just repeating other people's ideas and not actually putting themselves out
00:39:58.160
And I really admire the fact, Malcolm, that you're doing that.
0.98
00:40:00.960
And I'm just reflecting on what you say and asking dumb questions.
0.94
00:40:06.240
And you also do all the prep, all the editing, all the publishing.
00:40:10.940
I really like the point you made there that I would say.
00:40:13.780
The point that you're the smart one and know that I love you and you're pretty.
00:40:16.480
Put your ideas out there if you do want to criticize.
00:40:18.660
But if your ideas are just going along with what the urban monoculture thinks or what
00:40:25.020
like your average Presbyterian view or your average Catholic view, like you're not actually
00:40:35.480
But it's not even really putting yourself out there because like you...
00:40:40.440
No, but what I mean is you have a preset community that's going to back you.
00:40:44.020
Like you don't have to feel uncomfortable with your beliefs or views if it's what some
00:40:49.200
large group that has a defensive mechanism thinks.
00:40:52.520
This is one of my criticisms of Fundy Fridays that we did recently is she has zero takes
1.00
00:40:56.900
that go in any way against the urban monoculture.
00:40:59.700
Yes, she goes around criticizing people, but it's with the backing of this giant institutional
00:41:04.080
system where she just refuses to have unique takes.
0.99
00:41:08.200
And a note to self here, when Simone is talking, I want to have the Jack Donaghy negotiation
00:41:12.740
advice scene play because he does one about being quiet.
00:41:20.620
It was back when I'd walked down library aisles and I had free time and I would just choose
00:41:31.740
I've got to, I've got to, but the audience doesn't want to hear an explanation of why
1.00
00:41:36.400
They want to hear you engage with this subject.
00:41:40.340
What's going on with this and the dangers of therapy in a modern context.
00:41:43.960
What are your thoughts on this topic, on this study?
00:41:48.180
God, you've just been so articulate in talking about it.
00:41:50.280
I will say that my personal experience with therapy as a kid was that it did not resolve
00:41:56.900
my depression, that at one point I tried to convince my father that instead of paying
00:42:01.320
$60 an hour for a therapist, it was someone who's nice.
00:42:06.040
It just, I didn't find it to be particularly helpful that he should just pay me $60 an hour
00:42:12.440
That is the most baller based as F move for an adolescent girl who is feeling depression
00:42:22.260
and it was like, I am depressed, but I realized I can get undepressed for $60 an hour.
00:42:33.160
But then ultimately my own dad came up with the solution, for example, that cured my extremely
00:42:39.420
dangerous eating disorder where I just was losing and losing weight.
00:42:43.140
Like I'm five, eight and a half and I weighed under a hundred pounds at one point and that's
00:42:47.320
And he just figured out that if I could actually control that for me, it was about control and
00:42:52.620
that if I could weigh and measure all of my food and I had to balance calories and then
00:42:55.780
calories out, I would be able to feel like I still had control and not die maybe.
00:43:00.320
And so I just, I think that parents should not underestimate the extent to which they can
00:43:06.680
look at their children and come up with solutions to their problems.
00:43:12.900
Like you had this revelation a couple of weeks ago where you were like, you know what?
00:43:16.200
We need to stop thinking about what society assumes our kids want for birthday parties,
00:43:21.220
for going to bed, for activities and look at what they say they want and look at what they
00:43:26.300
react to and just build custom solutions for them.
00:43:29.080
And each of our kids need something a little different.
00:43:33.080
And I really admire the fact that you said that.
00:43:35.020
And I'll point out that the other major sources of my depression and my, especially like behavior
00:43:40.780
that was maladaptive was in response to a school environment or a lifestyle that really
00:43:48.100
And that in many cases, the best thing you can do as a parent is try to find the source
00:43:54.080
A therapist is not going to change the fact that your kid, for example, is just really
00:43:59.160
not dealing well with your school schedule or that their homeroom teacher is just terrible
00:44:04.680
and hates them, makes their lives miserable every day.
00:44:07.500
A lot of the people who've left comments on the YouTube video that you made on just how
00:44:12.760
bad is daycare and also other YouTube videos you've done on the schooling system, they've
00:44:16.120
pointed out how, oh, my kid would come home with dark circles under his eyes.
00:44:21.840
And then as soon as we moved them to homeschool.
00:44:23.720
So I would say, trust yourself as a parent, listen to your kid and consider changing their
00:44:29.060
And that's probably going to handle 90 plus percent of your kid's mental illness problems,
00:44:35.520
even like serious chemical depression, which is what I was experiencing.
00:44:41.380
I only ever experienced lifestyle changes that significantly evaporated my depression that
00:44:49.460
was very serious and in some cases life-threatening.
00:44:53.460
When you went to therapy as a kid, and that was a great addition, by the way, did they
00:45:00.400
Were they like, look for trauma in your childhood?
00:45:02.940
My therapist was a family friend of my parents.
00:45:05.740
So I think they trusted her, who had primarily stopped practicing and become like a poet.
00:45:13.500
That's good that you were in this sort of last wave of non-trauma-based therapy.
00:45:17.580
And this is what people should also note, in terms of like when to nope out, the moment
00:45:22.360
somebody starts talking about trauma, they're trying to brainwash.
00:45:24.680
And she was definitely, so she came from the old school, which I guess now would be seen
00:45:30.080
Like the new philosophy is don't address grievances like a man in a relationship where the woman
0.57
00:45:36.320
shows up and she's like, oh, my day was so bad.
00:45:38.180
And he's like, why don't you do this to solve the problem?
00:45:40.400
He's supposed to just listen and say, oh, that was so horrible.
00:45:48.540
Whereas she was at old school therapy, which was more mansplaining.
1.00
00:45:51.880
Like I would talk about how like I had these huge like contagion fears and I couldn't touch
00:45:55.520
And she's like, what's the worst thing that would happen if someone touched you?
00:46:00.760
It didn't solve my problems because I still just had this really intense stress.
00:46:06.020
It did solve her problems for anyone who has these sorts of problems.
00:46:09.200
Understanding that those are her limitations and then building systems around them, even though
00:46:17.420
And which is what you helped to expand by being like, it's okay.
00:46:22.520
Like again, and I've mentioned this on other podcasts, but I knew that I could be okay in
00:46:27.720
When your mom told me on a phone call that one of the family mottos was, I'm not okay.
00:46:35.680
Essentially saying we're all fucked up in this family.
0.99
00:46:40.920
I don't have to like the way that you have to weigh all your food when we go to fancy
00:46:44.860
Yes, it's going to be embarrassing, but whatever.
00:46:48.900
But I think that that was the thing that got you through it.
00:46:52.100
It was realizing you didn't need to worry about other people's judgments at fancy restaurants.
00:47:00.220
Or realizing that it's okay for you to ask me for personal space that I don't enter.
00:47:05.920
It is okay for you to ask me, don't touch you when you're eating.
00:47:08.140
Well, like it's not okay, but sometimes not okay is going to have to be okay.
00:47:13.280
The point I'm making is that there are certain fights to have and certain fights not to have.
00:47:21.720
We have a lot of new viewers and they don't know why we're in separate rooms in the same house.
00:47:29.660
I really can't think straight when I'm around other people.
00:47:33.560
I guess infants don't count because there's still so much a part of my body, but yeah,
00:47:37.860
if we're actually going to have intellectual conversations, we're going to do it far more
00:47:40.820
effectively if I'm not making eye contact with a person, if I'm not in the room, like literally
00:47:46.520
I'm not even making eye contact with Malcolm on our, on stream yard right now.
00:47:50.800
I am watching an Instagram reel of a Japanese chef cutting tonkatsu again and again on a loop.
00:47:59.120
And then that's how we get mental efficiency from her.
1.00
00:48:05.680
And I think when you are okay, so much of what we're doing, people are like, don't do that.
00:48:21.280
And I think that this is how you really power through as well is one, take control of your
00:48:26.040
And two, recognize your limits and build your lifestyle around those limits while respecting
00:48:31.320
the limits of your partner, looking for the actual things.
00:48:35.200
Like if something's just unreasonable, everything, the trigger to someone, then you're like, you
00:48:40.000
That's the way you are with like going to parties.
00:48:41.640
Like it is a nightmare for you, but sometimes you just have to do it.
00:48:47.340
You'll come to me and you'll be like, do I have permission to not go to this?
00:48:49.520
And I often say, no, you don't have permission to not go to this.
00:48:53.320
What was another thing that we've seen recently was, I don't know.
00:48:57.920
I love that we have found systems that work for us.
00:49:01.000
And I would encourage other people to search for systems that look for them and stay out
00:49:08.760
For people who want to hear more on how psychology has become a cult, look up our video, has psychology
00:49:14.420
become a cult or our video to be sad is to send or our video, the trauma conspiracy.
00:49:20.780
All of which deal with this topic or aspects of this topic in a lot more detail.
00:49:26.940
Stop taking Tylenol and just avoid walking on beds of nails.
00:49:37.600
I'm going to go downstairs and start shredding that chicken for taco night.