Classically Abby - 5 Reasons Marriage Is AWESOME! 👰💍｜｜ Why it's something you should TOTALLY look forward to...

00:00:00.240 Hello beautiful ladies and welcome to today's video where we're going to be talking about five reasons marriage is awesome.

00:00:09.860 So I've been married for two years now and I absolutely love being married but when I got married some people would have said I was a little bit young.

00:00:18.980 I got married at 24. Now when I was growing up in a more orthodox religious community that age was actually just about right and really accepted.

00:00:27.420 It wasn't considered young but at the time that I got married I wasn't living in the orthodox Jewish community.

00:00:32.300 I was living at Manhattan School of Music and I was in my grad program and a lot of the people around me thought that 24 was super young to get married.

00:00:40.220 And a lot of them also thought that marriage was kind of silly.

00:00:42.940 I knew a lot of my friends who said that they never even wanted to get married that they thought that the whole premise was silly and that it really wasn't even worth their time.

00:00:50.200 So I wanted to talk about today why marriage is amazing and why I'm so glad that I did get married at 24, that I am married now, and how much I love being married.

00:01:01.860 Now if you are hoping to get married but you aren't yet, I don't want this video to make you feel bad that you aren't married yet.

00:01:07.280 Because there are great things about being single but I do think that marriage is a really worthy goal and a really great place to aim.

00:01:13.360 So I don't want this to make you feel bad if you are looking and you haven't found the right guy yet.

00:01:17.980 Instead, look at the things that I'm talking about in this video as something to look forward to.

00:01:21.860 So let's get into it.

00:01:23.100 The first thing that I love about being married is that there's always someone to hang out with.

00:01:27.980 It's awesome to know that whenever you want to go out, there's someone there who will go out with you.

00:01:32.640 Whenever you want to go see a movie, your partner will go with you.

00:01:35.540 If you ever want to go to dinner together, your partner will go with you.

00:01:38.200 It's just so great to always have that built-in friend who's always ready to hang out with you.

00:01:43.640 And then in the evenings when you're chilling out, you have someone to chill out with.

00:01:46.840 It's the nicest feeling in the world.

00:01:49.140 I remember when I was young saying to my mom,

00:01:51.740 I really can't wait for the time that somebody is waiting for me to get home.

00:01:56.340 Now of course, my husband is the one who comes home and I'm the one waiting for him.

00:02:00.440 But it's the same idea that if I go out with friends and I come back, there's someone waiting there for me.

00:02:04.860 And it's just the nicest feeling that there's always someone there to be with.

00:02:09.540 That you don't have to be alone if you don't want to.

00:02:12.060 Now of course, that doesn't mean that you don't ever get alone time.

00:02:14.520 Because if you have a good partner and you're in a good relationship, you guys make time to just spend time alone.

00:02:19.900 But it means that when you don't want to be alone, there's somebody there to hang out with.

00:02:23.580 And it's the greatest thing.

00:02:25.460 One of the nicest things about being married is that you're with someone who wants to hang out with you.

00:02:29.600 And they want to be there wherever you go, whatever you do.

00:02:32.620 Now of course, you're going to have different interests, you're going to have different things you want to do.

00:02:36.620 But most of the time, you'll just have someone there to be with.

00:02:39.460 And it's so nice.

00:02:40.960 I remember when I was single in New York, I actually enjoyed being single.

00:02:44.540 But a lot of the time, I would just kind of do date days by myself.

00:02:47.840 And I would go out to lunch, I would see a movie, and I would go to a museum.

00:02:51.640 And I would do all those things by myself.

00:02:53.260 And I loved that I was able to and I had a great time.

00:02:56.180 But now, I have someone to do those things with.

00:02:58.360 And it's so nice to kind of have that comparison, where I had that time by myself and I got to enjoy my own schedule.

00:03:04.820 But now, I get to share that schedule with somebody who loves me and who I love.

00:03:08.880 And it's a wonderful thing.

00:03:10.600 So, having that built-in partnership, having that person who's always there to hang out with you, is so great.

00:03:15.920 I feel like COVID-19 has made this so much clearer, because it's really hard to be lonely.

00:03:21.020 And when you're married, you don't have that same fear of loneliness, because there is somebody there.

00:03:26.360 And you don't have to worry as much that you're going to be alone.

00:03:29.180 It's nice to have somebody there.

00:03:30.700 And it's just a wonderful part of being married.

00:03:33.400 The second thing is you have a 24-7 support system.

00:03:36.880 It's an amazing feeling to know that there's always going to be someone on the other end of the phone who you can reach out to if you need to.

00:03:43.600 You know that if you're ever in trouble, there's somebody there.

00:03:46.880 There's somebody who's watching out for you.

00:03:48.820 And they're just always going to be there to help you through those hard times.

00:03:52.420 Life is hard, and life is long.

00:03:54.540 And having somebody there and a partner to really help you through those hard times, and that you can help too, is so important and incredible that you have somebody to depend on.

00:04:05.080 And it's not just the bad stuff.

00:04:06.700 It's also the great stuff.

00:04:08.100 It's the successes.

00:04:08.920 When you're married, your successes are your partner's successes, and your partner's successes are your successes.

00:04:14.300 It's an incredible thing to know that when you do well, they're also doing well.

00:04:19.060 So your partner is always going to want you to succeed.

00:04:21.460 And it's an incredible feeling to know that you have somebody cheerleading for you on the sidelines.

00:04:27.700 And sometimes they're not even on the sidelines.

00:04:29.280 Maybe they're actually your teammate because they are working with you to help you get better at those things.

00:04:34.120 It's so nice to know that there's always someone there rooting for you, and your husband is always going to be there to help you.

00:04:41.520 Now, think about those times in your life where you've really had a hard time, and you haven't had someone there to help.

00:04:47.020 It's kind of scary.

00:04:48.400 It's really hard.

00:04:49.280 Again, I lived in New York for three years by myself, and there were times where I was ill, and there was nobody there to help me.

00:04:55.860 And it's really scary and hard, and now I have somebody there who's always going to help, who always wants to help, and who's going to go out of his way to help.

00:05:05.100 And I just feel so happy that I'm married because I know that I'm always going to have that support system in place.

00:05:12.160 Number three is that you can actually start planning your future.

00:05:15.920 And what I mean by that is when you're single, you can sort of make plans, but the problem is that you don't know exactly what things are going to look like because you don't have somebody else there whose plans you're going to need to take into account, too.

00:05:26.740 When you are living alone, all of those things are yourself.

00:05:30.160 You're independent.

00:05:31.300 You have to just do what you need to do while you're single.

00:05:34.080 And you can kind of make a five-year plan and a ten-year plan, but it doesn't necessarily mean it's going to come into play because, again, you don't have that person who is going to change those things,

00:05:42.740 who is going to help you decide when you're going to have kids, and who's going to help you know if you're going to work full-time and all of those things.

00:05:50.000 But when you get married, you can really start to make those plans because even though things aren't going to be exactly as you plan them, of course not.

00:05:56.360 You at least have the partner there who you have to take into account, and you'll at least know what his plans are and how that's going to affect your plans.

00:06:03.840 When you're trying to plan by yourself, it's just different because you don't necessarily know what things are going to change when you get married.

00:06:10.760 Getting married changes everything.

00:06:12.180 All of a sudden, you have a timeline for when you want to start a family, when you guys want to move, where you guys want to live.

00:06:18.880 All of those things change when you get married.

00:06:21.360 Like, I didn't know that I would live in Virginia and then live in Nebraska.

00:06:24.840 I never would have guessed that.

00:06:26.500 But then when I married my husband, I knew I had to go with him because my job is flexible.

00:06:31.400 I can work from anywhere, and his job isn't.

00:06:34.080 So all of a sudden, my plans were totally upended.

00:06:36.600 And I was able to be more secure in my own plans that I think I'm going to work remotely.

00:06:40.660 I think it's going to be easier for me to work from home because I'm not going to have to push and pull with my husband about where we'll move.

00:06:46.080 Don't you remember as a kid, you were like, by the time I'm 20, I'm going to be married, have a house, all of these crazy things that when you hit 24, you're like, well, none of that happened.

00:06:53.920 It's just impossible to make certain plans when you're not married, when you don't have your partner to help you with those plans.

00:06:59.940 And that's a really great thing about it is that all of a sudden, you have somebody who wants to make plans with you.

00:07:05.580 It's not just you trying to plan out against the world.

00:07:08.300 It's you and your partner, and you're trying to make a whole plan for yourselves.

00:07:11.740 It's a wonderful feeling to know that you're in it with someone, that you have a teammate to go through it all with.

00:07:17.440 And so that's a really awesome thing about being married that you kind of don't think about, that you all of a sudden are able to make more secure plans.

00:07:23.980 Number four is that you'll have somebody there to make you better.

00:07:28.140 Now, I think that marriage is one of the best ways to actually make you a better person.

00:07:32.640 If you're in a good marriage, your partner wants you to grow.

00:07:35.580 And it's not just things that will make their lives easier, but it's also they'll see things in you that they want you to be better about.

00:07:42.440 For me, I wasn't good at staying in touch with my friends.

00:07:45.120 I really just didn't reach out to them as often as I should have.

00:07:48.620 And my husband is great at that.

00:07:50.420 He would call his friends, have hour-long chats with them, and I never even thought to do that.

00:07:55.540 And when I got married, my husband told me, he said,

00:07:57.340 I think that you would benefit from really reaching out to your friends even if they're not in the same city as you.

00:08:02.020 And all of a sudden, I had this whole different perspective on my friendships.

00:08:06.300 And it was something that I had never seen myself.

00:08:08.940 And when you're single, you're constantly having to try and find those things about you to fix on your own.

00:08:14.220 You're trying to make yourself better, but you don't have somebody to bounce ideas off of.

00:08:17.320 You don't have somebody who's going to notice those things.

00:08:19.380 Like, for myself, I didn't realize that I wasn't great at conflict.

00:08:22.720 Even when it was important for me to talk to people about things, I just wasn't good at doing that.

00:08:27.740 And my husband pointed that out to me, and it's made me a better person.

00:08:30.900 And it's one of the things I really value about marriage is that you have somebody there who wants to help you grow.

00:08:37.280 And I know that I've done that for my husband.

00:08:39.020 He's done that for me.

00:08:40.240 And it's really hard to do that on your own.

00:08:41.940 So that's a wonderful thing about marriage that I'm so glad I have the benefit of.

00:08:46.440 The last wonderful thing about marriage is that you don't know the value in your own life until you're living for another person.

00:08:53.420 When you are married, it's not about you.

00:08:56.280 It's about the relationship.

00:08:58.280 It's about the two of you as a team.

00:09:00.480 And you can't put yourself first.

00:09:02.280 And if you do, it's going to make your marriage a problem.

00:09:04.680 You constantly have to be living with your partner's needs in mind.

00:09:08.620 And that is an incredible responsibility and an incredible way to make your life have meaning.

00:09:14.700 When you are constantly just living for your own self and constantly chasing your desires,

00:09:19.780 you're not really recognizing the meaning of your life.

00:09:22.600 And the meaning of your life is living for another person.

00:09:25.360 Even though marriage makes your life easier in a lot of ways, this is one of those things that's bigger than that.

00:09:30.720 And it's so great because it really prepares you to have a child.

00:09:34.600 You're caring for someone else, but they don't really need you in the way that a child does.

00:09:39.640 You have to take care of your partner, even though they've chosen to be with you and they can take care of themselves.

00:09:44.880 But a good marriage is the two of you taking care of each other.

00:09:47.300 And then when you have a child, when that child comes into the world and it really does need you and it can't survive without you,

00:09:53.380 you already have those things in place in how to take care of another person and to put value into your life by making your life about somebody else.

00:10:02.080 It's just the best way to prepare for having a child, and it's also a wonderful way to make your life more worth living.

00:10:10.740 My husband and I live for each other.

00:10:12.440 That doesn't mean that we're not individuals.

00:10:13.900 It doesn't mean that we don't take care of ourselves.

00:10:16.480 But what it does mean is that we have purpose in our marriage.

00:10:19.980 We know that we're living for one another, and that's very godly in my opinion.

00:10:25.380 It makes me feel closer to God, and it also just makes life so much more than just constantly chasing those desires.

00:10:32.020 I am so glad that I got married two years ago to my wonderful husband.

00:10:36.340 And this list is just a tiny portion of reasons why marriage is amazing.

00:10:41.840 Please let me know in the comments if you guys have other reasons why you love being married.

00:10:45.860 If you'd like to see a part two to this video, even a part three, I'd love to hear.

00:10:50.340 Thank you guys so much for watching today's video.

00:10:52.560 Please subscribe to my channel and blog if you haven't already.

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00:11:07.780 And I'll see you guys in my next video.

00:11:10.120 Bye!

Classically Abby - July 09, 2020

5 Reasons Marriage Is AWESOME! 👰💍｜｜ Why it's something you should TOTALLY look forward to...

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