Classically Abby - 5 Things YOU Should Know BEFORE Choosing A Career If You Want To Be A Stay-At-Home Mom...

00:00:00.000 Hello, Classic Crew, and welcome to today's video where we're going to be talking about

00:00:04.260 how you can do work before you have kids that will allow you to stay at home with your kids

00:00:09.600 after you're a mom. If you are new to my channel, here we talk about classic living and traditional

00:00:19.180 values, and I would love if you would consider subscribing and hitting that notification bell,

00:00:23.000 as well as heading over to my Substack newsletter where you'll get access to a ton of exclusive

00:00:27.260 content, including my book club, my podcast, and my weekly article. If you see me looking off to

00:00:34.140 the side or hear any sounds in this video, that is my baby. He is very entertained by what I am

00:00:39.540 doing right now, so that is just a warning ahead of time. But in today's video, I want to talk about

00:00:45.260 five ways that you can have a job before you get married, before you have kids, but that will allow

00:00:51.100 you to transition to being a stay-at-home mom or working from home so that you can be around for

00:00:56.880 your children as they're growing up. I think that a lot of the time we've been taught that we have

00:01:01.960 to pursue our career as hard as possible, and then when we get married and we have kids and we want

00:01:06.160 to stay at home, there's a lot of guilt involved with that. So today I want to talk about ways that

00:01:09.860 you can actually choose a job that won't make you feel bad when you want to stay at home, or if you

00:01:16.280 want to work part-time from home. So I'm excited to get into today's list. I wish that I had had this

00:01:22.540 when I was younger, that someone had talked about it in this way, so that I could choose a job that

00:01:27.900 was realistic, that I enjoyed, but that also was actually practical to my life after becoming a mom.

00:01:34.960 So let's get into today's video. Okay, the first way that you can pursue a job that won't mess you up

00:01:41.400 when you want to be a stay-at-home mom is to not put yourself into debt. This is, I think, the most

00:01:47.780 important thing that you can do as a woman who wants to be at home or who wants to work part-time 0.81

00:01:53.740 from home. First of all, I don't think anyone should go into debt for education, so let's just

00:01:58.980 get out of the way. But especially if you want to be a stay-at-home mom or work from home, putting

00:02:04.920 yourself into debt is really going to limit those options for a few reasons. One, you're going to have

00:02:10.060 to pay off that money. And number two, I think there's a lot of guilt associated with putting a lot

00:02:17.400 of money into something and then not actually pursuing that career to its highest level. It is

00:02:23.480 not a good idea to ever put yourself into debt for education because it doesn't ever pay back

00:02:28.280 what you put into it. But especially in this situation, just go to a community college or try

00:02:35.500 and get a scholarship or go to a local school as opposed to going out of state. Don't put yourself in

00:02:41.120 a financial situation that would prevent you from being able to actually be a stay-at-home mom

00:02:46.020 or just to work a job that kind of contributes to the household but doesn't necessarily provide

00:02:52.640 for the entire household. Having debt is never worth it and it really only will come back to make

00:02:58.740 you miserable. And if you feel like you have debt that you need to pay off, you won't be able to

00:03:04.840 stop working or work less with a clear conscience. So I really don't recommend putting yourself into

00:03:10.940 debt in any situation. But in this situation particularly, I would not recommend it at all.

00:03:17.840 Number two is don't put your career over everything else. So this is something I think is,

00:03:25.280 it's again, this sunk cost fallacy. So when you are pursuing certain careers, okay, let's talk about

00:03:31.920 law, let's talk about medicine. That job takes over your life. Like you cannot do anything else

00:03:38.740 while you are in school for those things, depending on, depending on kind of your specialty and all

00:03:43.700 these things. But, but in most cases, it really is all consuming. If you are pursuing a career like

00:03:50.160 that, then if you decide not to pursue it after you have children, you will feel guilty again. It's

00:03:58.220 this guilt thing that we all struggle with for having wasted all that time on something that you don't

00:04:04.760 actually want to pursue all the way to the top. So don't choose a career or study in something

00:04:11.500 that is going to take up your whole life so that you then feel guilty that you spent all that time

00:04:17.860 on something that didn't pay off. It's just going to make you sad at the end of the day. If you look

00:04:25.060 back at those years and think, oh, I could have been using it in a different or better way. And instead,

00:04:30.220 I used it for that. And now I'm not even pursuing that. Now, I believe that everything you've done

00:04:35.080 in your past influences who you are and where you are in your future. But even with that, you still

00:04:39.960 have to struggle with those guilt feelings of I wasted time. And when you have that sunk cost fallacy,

00:04:45.800 which is, oh, I put in this much time, therefore I must continue, then it's really hard to break that

00:04:51.520 philosophy. And instead, you might end up forcing yourself into putting in more time into something that

00:04:58.140 you don't want to do and ultimately will not make you a better mother or a better wife.

00:05:03.440 Number three is choose something that has flexibility and that at some point you could do

00:05:09.060 from home. There are certain jobs that you can't do from home, right? You can't be a doctor from home,

00:05:15.320 but there are other jobs that you can do from home. For example, for me, I do content creation. Now,

00:05:20.940 not everyone can do this and make a living, but the nice thing about this job is that I can do it from

00:05:25.580 home. And I do have flexibility. I work on my own hours and I have the opportunity to spend time with

00:05:31.880 my baby and take care of my home and be a homemaker. So finding a job that really does have that

00:05:37.700 flexibility is going to be imperative to you being able to stay at home. Now, you may choose not to

00:05:43.440 work at all, which is a beautiful thing, just being a full-time homemaker. But if you do need to work

00:05:49.160 or if you choose to work part-time, you need to be able to have the flexibility to do it on your own

00:05:55.240 hours. Because as a mom, you are never going to be able to say, oh, I can work from this time to this 0.99

00:06:01.340 time without any problems. Unless you have help, a daycare, a nanny, a mom around, you can't guarantee 1.00

00:06:08.960 that those hours are going to be stable. So you need to have flexibility. So look into careers that A,

00:06:14.980 you have a passion for, that you enjoy, that you like, but B, can also be flexible enough for you

00:06:20.400 to actually do them from home and do them on your own hours. Number four is save, save, save. Save

00:06:29.000 your money. If you save money and you kind of have a little nest egg saved for when you get married,

00:06:35.320 then not only are you going into near marriage without any debt, you're also going in with some

00:06:41.140 money that can help pay for groceries or can help pay the bills, things that you may not choose to

00:06:47.820 contribute financially once you get married. But if you have that money saved from before,

00:06:52.580 you can help at least at the beginning with those bills, with those smaller expenses like groceries,

00:06:58.520 things like that. If you have that money saved, that will be so helpful for you and your future

00:07:03.120 husband. Because you're contributing by taking care of the home and domestically and being a mom, 0.83

00:07:08.840 you don't need to contribute financially if that's what you and your husband are able to work out.

00:07:14.360 But with that in mind, it's really nice to have a little bit of money to bring into your marriage

00:07:18.240 that can just help out with those smaller, smaller things. Number five is do work that you can take

00:07:24.960 time out of the workforce and still re-enter it after a certain period of time. I think that it's nice

00:07:30.560 to work, have children, stay at home, and then re-enter the workforce after your children are grown.

00:07:35.680 Or be a really involved grandmother or volunteer, that kind of thing. But if you want to work before

00:07:41.520 you have children and then work after you have children, the only way that's going to work is 0.87

00:07:45.600 if you choose a career that will allow you to do that. Because not every career will you be able to

00:07:51.600 take a 20-year absence and then re-enter the workforce. But maybe there are certain jobs where

00:07:57.820 you can kind of keep abreast of the information that you need to keep abreast of. And you can kind of

00:08:03.520 do your best in your off time from the children to learn new technologies, but that your education

00:08:11.440 and your work experience from 20 years ago will still translate to what you want to do after your

00:08:16.400 children are grown. And because there are certain jobs that won't allow you to do that, it's important

00:08:21.600 for you to choose a job that does allow you to do that. You also may choose not to re-enter the workforce,

00:08:26.480 which is totally fine. But if you want to, then A, maybe doing some part-time work so that you kind

00:08:33.040 of have a resume that would be worth looking at after your kids are grown. But B, making sure that

00:08:39.200 you're just choosing something initially that would allow you to take that bigger break and still be a

00:08:45.120 relevant person in 20-ish years. That kind of thing. But those are my ideas for how you can work before

00:08:50.880 you have children and then be a homemaker or work from home when you have children. That's how I

00:08:56.400 think you should go about it. I'm not somebody who believes that you need to follow your dreams because

00:09:01.360 I believe that your dream should be being a mother, being a wife, being known in the context of your

00:09:07.200 family. So if you liked today's video, make sure to like this video and drop a comment down below.

00:09:13.840 I'd love to hear your thoughts. I'd also love to know if you are studying something in school right now,

00:09:19.600 let me know what you are studying. I think that'd be really interesting to hear. Thank you so much

00:09:23.520 for watching today's video. If you aren't already subscribed to my channel, make sure to do so and

00:09:27.280 make sure to head over to my Substack newsletter. And if you're not following me on social media,

00:09:31.680 it's at classicallyabbie absolutely everywhere. Thank you guys so much for watching and I'll see you

00:09:35.680 guys in my next video. Bye!

Classically Abby - August 25, 2022

5 Things YOU Should Know BEFORE Choosing A Career If You Want To Be A Stay-At-Home Mom...

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