5 Things YOU Should Know BEFORE Choosing A Career If You Want To Be A Stay-At-Home Mom...
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Summary
5 ways you can have a job before you get married that will allow you to transition to being a stay-at-home mom or working part-time from home so that you can be around for your children as they grow up.
Transcript
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Hello, Classic Crew, and welcome to today's video where we're going to be talking about
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how you can do work before you have kids that will allow you to stay at home with your kids
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after you're a mom. If you are new to my channel, here we talk about classic living and traditional
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values, and I would love if you would consider subscribing and hitting that notification bell,
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as well as heading over to my Substack newsletter where you'll get access to a ton of exclusive
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content, including my book club, my podcast, and my weekly article. If you see me looking off to
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the side or hear any sounds in this video, that is my baby. He is very entertained by what I am
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doing right now, so that is just a warning ahead of time. But in today's video, I want to talk about
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five ways that you can have a job before you get married, before you have kids, but that will allow
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you to transition to being a stay-at-home mom or working from home so that you can be around for
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your children as they're growing up. I think that a lot of the time we've been taught that we have
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to pursue our career as hard as possible, and then when we get married and we have kids and we want
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to stay at home, there's a lot of guilt involved with that. So today I want to talk about ways that
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you can actually choose a job that won't make you feel bad when you want to stay at home, or if you
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want to work part-time from home. So I'm excited to get into today's list. I wish that I had had this
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when I was younger, that someone had talked about it in this way, so that I could choose a job that
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was realistic, that I enjoyed, but that also was actually practical to my life after becoming a mom.
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So let's get into today's video. Okay, the first way that you can pursue a job that won't mess you up
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when you want to be a stay-at-home mom is to not put yourself into debt. This is, I think, the most
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important thing that you can do as a woman who wants to be at home or who wants to work part-time
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from home. First of all, I don't think anyone should go into debt for education, so let's just
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get out of the way. But especially if you want to be a stay-at-home mom or work from home, putting
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yourself into debt is really going to limit those options for a few reasons. One, you're going to have
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to pay off that money. And number two, I think there's a lot of guilt associated with putting a lot
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of money into something and then not actually pursuing that career to its highest level. It is
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not a good idea to ever put yourself into debt for education because it doesn't ever pay back
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what you put into it. But especially in this situation, just go to a community college or try
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and get a scholarship or go to a local school as opposed to going out of state. Don't put yourself in
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a financial situation that would prevent you from being able to actually be a stay-at-home mom
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or just to work a job that kind of contributes to the household but doesn't necessarily provide
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for the entire household. Having debt is never worth it and it really only will come back to make
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you miserable. And if you feel like you have debt that you need to pay off, you won't be able to
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stop working or work less with a clear conscience. So I really don't recommend putting yourself into
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debt in any situation. But in this situation particularly, I would not recommend it at all.
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Number two is don't put your career over everything else. So this is something I think is,
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it's again, this sunk cost fallacy. So when you are pursuing certain careers, okay, let's talk about
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law, let's talk about medicine. That job takes over your life. Like you cannot do anything else
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while you are in school for those things, depending on, depending on kind of your specialty and all
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these things. But, but in most cases, it really is all consuming. If you are pursuing a career like
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that, then if you decide not to pursue it after you have children, you will feel guilty again. It's
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this guilt thing that we all struggle with for having wasted all that time on something that you don't
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actually want to pursue all the way to the top. So don't choose a career or study in something
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that is going to take up your whole life so that you then feel guilty that you spent all that time
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on something that didn't pay off. It's just going to make you sad at the end of the day. If you look
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back at those years and think, oh, I could have been using it in a different or better way. And instead,
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I used it for that. And now I'm not even pursuing that. Now, I believe that everything you've done
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in your past influences who you are and where you are in your future. But even with that, you still
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have to struggle with those guilt feelings of I wasted time. And when you have that sunk cost fallacy,
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which is, oh, I put in this much time, therefore I must continue, then it's really hard to break that
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philosophy. And instead, you might end up forcing yourself into putting in more time into something that
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you don't want to do and ultimately will not make you a better mother or a better wife.
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Number three is choose something that has flexibility and that at some point you could do
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from home. There are certain jobs that you can't do from home, right? You can't be a doctor from home,
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but there are other jobs that you can do from home. For example, for me, I do content creation. Now,
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not everyone can do this and make a living, but the nice thing about this job is that I can do it from
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home. And I do have flexibility. I work on my own hours and I have the opportunity to spend time with
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my baby and take care of my home and be a homemaker. So finding a job that really does have that
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flexibility is going to be imperative to you being able to stay at home. Now, you may choose not to
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work at all, which is a beautiful thing, just being a full-time homemaker. But if you do need to work
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or if you choose to work part-time, you need to be able to have the flexibility to do it on your own
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hours. Because as a mom, you are never going to be able to say, oh, I can work from this time to this
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time without any problems. Unless you have help, a daycare, a nanny, a mom around, you can't guarantee
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that those hours are going to be stable. So you need to have flexibility. So look into careers that A,
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you have a passion for, that you enjoy, that you like, but B, can also be flexible enough for you
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to actually do them from home and do them on your own hours. Number four is save, save, save. Save
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your money. If you save money and you kind of have a little nest egg saved for when you get married,
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then not only are you going into near marriage without any debt, you're also going in with some
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money that can help pay for groceries or can help pay the bills, things that you may not choose to
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contribute financially once you get married. But if you have that money saved from before,
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you can help at least at the beginning with those bills, with those smaller expenses like groceries,
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things like that. If you have that money saved, that will be so helpful for you and your future
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husband. Because you're contributing by taking care of the home and domestically and being a mom,
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you don't need to contribute financially if that's what you and your husband are able to work out.
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But with that in mind, it's really nice to have a little bit of money to bring into your marriage
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that can just help out with those smaller, smaller things. Number five is do work that you can take
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time out of the workforce and still re-enter it after a certain period of time. I think that it's nice
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to work, have children, stay at home, and then re-enter the workforce after your children are grown.
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Or be a really involved grandmother or volunteer, that kind of thing. But if you want to work before
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you have children and then work after you have children, the only way that's going to work is
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if you choose a career that will allow you to do that. Because not every career will you be able to
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take a 20-year absence and then re-enter the workforce. But maybe there are certain jobs where
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you can kind of keep abreast of the information that you need to keep abreast of. And you can kind of
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do your best in your off time from the children to learn new technologies, but that your education
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and your work experience from 20 years ago will still translate to what you want to do after your
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children are grown. And because there are certain jobs that won't allow you to do that, it's important
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for you to choose a job that does allow you to do that. You also may choose not to re-enter the workforce,
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which is totally fine. But if you want to, then A, maybe doing some part-time work so that you kind
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of have a resume that would be worth looking at after your kids are grown. But B, making sure that
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you're just choosing something initially that would allow you to take that bigger break and still be a
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relevant person in 20-ish years. That kind of thing. But those are my ideas for how you can work before
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you have children and then be a homemaker or work from home when you have children. That's how I
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think you should go about it. I'm not somebody who believes that you need to follow your dreams because
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I believe that your dream should be being a mother, being a wife, being known in the context of your
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family. So if you liked today's video, make sure to like this video and drop a comment down below.
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I'd love to hear your thoughts. I'd also love to know if you are studying something in school right now,
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let me know what you are studying. I think that'd be really interesting to hear. Thank you so much
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for watching today's video. If you aren't already subscribed to my channel, make sure to do so and
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make sure to head over to my Substack newsletter. And if you're not following me on social media,
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it's at classicallyabbie absolutely everywhere. Thank you guys so much for watching and I'll see you