7 Tips To Grow From A GIRL To A CLASSIC WOMAN ｜｜ Become the mature woman you were meant to be!
Episode Stats
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Summary
In this episode, I talk about the transition from being a girl to becoming a woman, and the 7 steps we can take to become a classic woman. I discuss how to develop a sense of style, and how to become more comfortable in your own skin.
Transcript
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Hello, Classic Crew, and welcome to today's video where we're going to be talking about
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seven ways to grow from a girl to a classic woman.
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Moving into adulthood can be really tricky to kind of navigate, and I think a lot of
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the time we talk about the move from being a child through puberty, but then we don't
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often talk about the transition from being a girl to being a woman, and that is something
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that I really wanted to talk about here on my channel because I think that there are
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some steps that we can take to grow and become more mature, and it doesn't feel as drastic
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as the change from being a child to being a pubescent girl does, because obviously your
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body's changing in a lot of ways during that transition, but when you're going from being
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a girl to becoming a woman, it's a lot more intentional.
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It's a lot more about your choices and a lot more about paying attention to becoming the
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woman you want to be, and so I really wanted to talk about seven ways that we can become
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more classic and become more mature and grow into the woman that we want to be.
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So I'm really excited to share these with you today, so let's get into it.
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The first thing I want to talk about is developing your sense of style.
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Now I know I talk about this a lot on my channel, and I know it can seem superficial, but it is
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I've always felt like your style has something to do with who you are as a person, and that
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it really kind of reflects who you are, and I felt like I couldn't say that because
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people would think that it was superficial for me to care about what I wore, to care
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And I was listening to the podcast, The Simple Sophisticate, which I mentioned in a Scoop
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episode a week ago or so, and on that episode she really talked about why it is so important
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And it felt like someone had put into words all of the thoughts that I had had for so long.
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And basically what it comes down to is that there's a difference between fashion and style.
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It's seeing what everyone else is wearing and copying them so that you fit in.
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Whereas style is something that reflects who you are, and it reflects your inner personality.
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So the cool thing about developing your personal sense of style is that in order to do that
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You have to know what you want to present to the world.
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And it's much more a reflection of who you are.
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And trying to figure out who you are is the first step in becoming a woman, in becoming
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a classic woman, is really recognizing what you stand for, who you are, and knowing what
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makes you happy, what works with who you want to be.
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And so I really like the idea that our clothing can reflect that.
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I truly believe that as you get to know yourself and you become more comfortable in who you are,
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you'll start to gravitate toward the clothing that reflects that for you and shows that
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you care about yourself and the way that you look.
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It's actually kind of the first step in embracing who you really are because you're putting out
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to the world what you want people to know about you.
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So for me, for example, I have really been working on honing my personal style.
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I only want to own things that really speak to me and that really speak to the way that
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I want to present myself because, right, there are certain pieces of clothing, there are
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certain trends that I do like, but I wouldn't wear them because that's not actually who I
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And I want to wear things that do reflect who I am.
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And so of course it's always a process, but I have whittled down my closet to the pieces
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that really do speak to me and that do show what kind of a person I am.
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So for me, I know that I really like feminine clothing with a masculine twist.
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Now that's not all of my clothing, right, because there's all different kinds of things we can
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put in our wardrobe, but I really like button-down dresses, for example.
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I really like wearing a pair of jeans with a flowier top.
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And the fact that I wear modest clothing reflects what I care about, where I come from, and what
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Now, of course, on the other end of the spectrum, I have a lot of very feminine dresses.
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And so figuring out which pieces speak to me, not just buying things because someone else
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has them or because it's on sale, but because when I pick that up, it feels like a reflection
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of me, has made me feel more mature, funnily enough, because clothing really reflects who
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you are on the inside and shows that you understand yourself, which is the first step to becoming
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a more classic woman and moving out of girlhood.
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Number two is engage with your beliefs and really understand them so that you don't feel pressured
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Knowing what you believe and understanding it is so important to becoming a woman.
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If you don't really know what you believe and you constantly feel like you're on shaky
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ground, then you can't really become the best version of yourself because you might feel
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more defensive when somebody comes to talk to you rather than ready to engage in an open
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discussion because you do understand your ideas and you can listen to somebody else's ideas
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with an open mind because if they do change your mind, it's because they had good enough
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arguments to do so, not because you're being peer pressured into it because you know what
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Knowing what you believe and really educating yourself on the things that you believe will
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give you a more firm foundation in who you are.
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So does that mean that you can't have a conversation with someone who disagrees with you?
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It actually makes the conversations that you have with people who disagree with you even more
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effective because you won't feel like you need to shut down the conversation just because
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you don't know why you believe what you believe.
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You can be very confident in that conversation.
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And like I said before, if somebody changes your mind, it's because they had a good enough
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It's not because you felt peer pressured or you felt confused.
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It's more that you are educated on your own opinion so when somebody gives you an opposing
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opinion, you can really listen and hear it because you actually know what you're talking
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about and that is just going to give you a really firm foundation to figure out who you are and
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to embrace what you believe even more so because you have actually taken the time to understand
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Knowing who you are starts with what you think, what you believe, not just the kind of person
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that you are and your personality traits, but also what you are choosing to live out.
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And so knowing your beliefs, understanding them is going to give you a really good base
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for your growth from a girl to a classic woman.
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The third way to grow from a girl to a woman is to get off social media more than you're
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Everybody knows that the endless scroll was made to be addictive so you stay on your phone
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But the fact of the matter is being on Instagram is really hard on young women.
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And I'm using Instagram as an example because it's very popular among women.
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We like to follow friends or follow celebrities and see what people in the world are up to.
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Because again, we are social creatures and we treat Instagram like it's a social outlet
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The fact is being on your phone all the time is not something that allows you to mature because
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you're feeling that constant pressure from all of these other opinions that may not reflect
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what you actually believe and you can't really argue with it because it's just there for
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It's really funny because when Jacob and I first got married, I was on Instagram much
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And it actually was not great for my mental health.
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I remember that I would look at these women who looked photoshopped and just think to myself,
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And at the time, I wasn't using social media for my job so I was on it for fun.
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It was a way for me to compare myself to people who I was never going to look like.
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And Jacob actually asked me at the time, he said, are you sure this is making you happy?
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I think you might be happier if you were to take Instagram off your phone for a little
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I cannot tell you how important that was for me to just remove the temptation of looking
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at other people all the time and comparing myself when it's not helping you grow and
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If you're using it here and there to reach out to friends, kind of follow and see what
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they're up to, that's a good use of social media, right, is reaching out to the people
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that you know and love and being able to see what they're doing in their lives.
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That's a good thing that we can use social media for.
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But if you use it whenever you have a free moment, just kind of reach for your phone
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in that addictive way, it just ends up making you kind of feel bad about yourself.
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You start to think that it's fun because, oh, I'm wasting time on here.
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At the end of that, do you feel like you did something productive or do you feel like you
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And the thing about being on social media is that it's really not an intentional choice
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It's not something where we sit down and think, I'm going to be on Instagram for 30 minutes
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and I'm intentionally taking this time to scroll.
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Most of the time you pick up your phone without even thinking and you start scrolling.
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And being intentional is one of the huge parts of becoming a woman and maturing.
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And that's something I'm going to be talking about a little bit later.
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And a lot of the time it's just going to distract you from what you really want to be doing.
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Number four is try to embrace being calm and collected and accept what you can't control.
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As a younger woman, I feel like I was a lot more harried than I am now.
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Of course, it kind of comes and goes depending on what's going on in your life.
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But I felt like I had control over not just my own choices, but over the choices of other
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I felt like I had control over more than I did.
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And so when things didn't turn out my way, I would get frustrated and I would feel really
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But once you accept what you can't control, everything starts to feel a little bit more
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calm because you only have control over your own reactions and over your actions.
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You can control how you react to things and you can also control just your own choices overall.
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Part of growing up is recognizing that life isn't always easy, but that doesn't mean that
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It's not always happy, but it is lovely in all of its forms.
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And I think that being a mature, classic woman is being able to accept all the ups and
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Once you realize that pretty much everything is small stuff, being able to differentiate
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between what's a really big problem and what's a small problem, once you kind of differentiate
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between those two things and realize that many things in life are mostly the small things,
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that's when you can be more calm and that's when you can really start to live life in
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Now that's not to say that you don't make choices for the future.
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But what I mean is that when you're enjoying something in the present, you're not thinking
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five minutes into the future about how you're not going to be enjoying it anymore.
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You're living the joyful moment and accepting that, okay, it may not last forever, but that
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And the thing about being more calm and collected is that you'll be more effective as a woman
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when you are calm because you can't get things done as well when you are anxious or worried
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or stressed because your brain feels cluttered with that emotion instead of saying, this is
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a stressful situation, but I don't have to be stressed because if I'm stressed, then the
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stressful situation goes from, okay, the situation itself is stressful to me being stressed and not
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And the thing about being a mature, calm woman is that you become the kind of woman that people
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can depend on and rely on and go to for advice.
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And when you're a wife and a mother, people do depend and rely on you.
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And if you are really stressed and high-strung and anxious, if you can't calm down in the
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moments when it really counts, people are going to have to take care of you instead of you
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It's always important to take time just every so often, periodically, to step back from everything
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that's going on and check in with yourself and really see, okay, how can I improve?
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And not let the stressors of life feel like they're never ending and that you can't overcome
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your own reaction to them and just being able to sit down and really ponder how can you grow
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and become more intentional and deliberate with the way that you respond to things will
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be a huge part of becoming a classic and mature woman.
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Number five is to take responsibility for your actions.
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Don't blame anyone else for the way that you act.
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When you're young, it's so easy to blame everybody else for the way that you act.
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Usually it's your parents who are the prime target because you can point to something that
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they did growing up that makes you respond a certain way now.
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But you can even blame your siblings or your friends or anyone else except yourself when
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It's easier not to take responsibility when you're young because then you don't have to
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face the fact that you might have to make a change.
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But once you start taking responsibility for your actions, then you can really start to become
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You can start to grow and change and improve because you're ready to grow.
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Because you're ready to face the fact that you may have made mistakes and that's okay
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And it's so exciting to think that you're on a never-ending journey of self-improvement
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for not only yourself, but for your partner, for God, for your community, for your friends.
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And it's so great to be able to ask more of yourself, to take responsibility for the way that
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you react because it can only lead to your happiness because it'll improve the relationships
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If you're constantly blaming somebody else for the way that you act now, then you're not going
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to have great relationships because people are going to get frustrated with you because you're not
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implementing changes to the way that you treat them.
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And if you are trying to grow and if you are trying to be better, then all of a sudden the relationships
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with the people around you are going to be better because the communication is going to be easier.
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And people are going to see that you really are trying not to react in that
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And taking responsibility for your actions is also part of taking control of your actions and reactions.
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And once you do that, you can really become more mature because
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Number six is be cleanly. Taking care of your items and your home is so important to being a mature
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and classic woman. Everyone always says that a cluttered house is a cluttered mind,
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but I can tell you that is definitely true for me.
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So keeping your house clean is part of your growth as a person because if you can't have
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the mental brain space to even address growing as a person because everything is just a mess all
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the time and your mind is also cluttered, then you won't be able to take the time to become more
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mature and to take that, you know, little break and step back from everything around you and just
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think because you're constantly going to be looking at mess. And on the other side of things,
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taking care of your items, it shows that you're mature because you actually care about the meaning
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of a dollar. You aren't wasting your items by not taking care of them and assuming that you can
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easily replace them. You are taking care of your purchases. Being clean also means that you are
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aware of how important your environment is. And that is a very mature recognition is being able
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to say, okay, there are certain things in my space that don't work for me. The house is a mess and it's
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making me feel stressed. Recognizing that all of these things play a part into your mental health,
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into your mental growth, into your maturity journey is a part of growing up and being more
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of a classic woman because you are taking into account what is around you and you can have the kind
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of home that you've always dreamed of when you do keep it clean, when you do recognize the importance
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of your environment. There are two things about being messy. And basically, if you are messy, it either
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means that you expect somebody else to take care of the mess, which is a juvenile way to look at it,
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it's a girl way to look at it rather than a woman's way of looking at things, or you don't really care
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or notice, but you're not being sensitive to the people around you who might care and notice. And so being
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clean is only going to be a positive reflection on you and is going to be a reflection of your
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maturity. My seventh and last piece of advice is to figure out what your mission is and then always
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keep it at the forefront of your mind. As you're maturing into a woman, you're going to start figuring
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out what it is that you want to contribute to the world and how you want to live your life. Everyone has
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a different mission and a different view of what they would like to do and contribute to the world
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or just to their communities. There are women who feel that they want to just be stay-at-home moms
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and they really want to invest that time into their families, into their children, into their
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husband's well-being, and that is amazing. And once they figure that out, that is their mission.
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They know what they want and they can live their life fully with that as their goal. And then there
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are the women who feel that they have a mission that is outside of the home as well as having a family
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that they really want to pursue. We can see that with the women of the RNC like I just recently
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mentioned. Women like Nikki Haley or Elise Stefanik, they felt that they had a mission for the good of
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America. And so they are out there fighting for that and that is part of their mission. And so as
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mature women, they can really invest their time into being intentional with that mission and knowing
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that this is how they're going to structure their life so that they can accomplish it. It's so important
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to live out your God-given mission with courage and faith. When you have a mission, everything is
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in service of that and it will make growing, changing, and improving all part of the journey.
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Once you know what you want and who you are, you can live out the best version of you. You can change
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for the better, grow for the better, and really fight for what matters to you and to the people in
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your life who you love and care about. And that to me is reaching your potential as a classic woman,
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is living out your mission, knowing who you are deep down, and really expressing that with the
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intentionality of a mature woman. So those were my seven ways to grow from a girl to a classic woman.
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Let me know in the comments if you have any other recommendations for the women in our classic crew
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who are young women and who want to mature. I'd love to hear your guys' thoughts. Thank you guys so
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much for watching today's video. Please subscribe to my channel and blog if you haven't already.
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