ASK ME ANYTHING： I'm Officially A Mama Now!!
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Summary
In this video, I answer all of your questions about being a new mom and what it s like being a mother. I talk about the highs and lows of motherhood and how it s not always easy, but it s definitely worth it!
Transcript
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Hello Classic Crew and welcome to today's video where I'm going to be answering all of your
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questions about being a new mom. So I am officially a mother now. It's crazy to say that and so
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amazing. Being a mom is highs and lows. It is amazing, the most wonderful thing I've ever done,
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the most worthy thing I've ever done. It is what life is about and it is also the hardest thing
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I've ever done and I want to share with you guys all of it. I want to be honest about my experience
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as a mother because I think that it can be really difficult to see people seeming to handle motherhood
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with absolutely no problem and just thinking like, oh it must be easy. Why isn't it easy for me?
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It's not easy. Motherhood is not easy but it is so worth it and I think that it's really important to
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talk about those things in the same way that it's important to talk about how marriage isn't always
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the easiest thing in the world but it's worth it. Reading Jordan Peterson's book, The 12 Rules for
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Life, or just maybe it's 12 Rules for Life, it teaches you a lot. One of the things that makes
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you realize is that life isn't just about things being easy, it's about finding meaning and purpose
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and fulfillment and having a child is the ultimate version of that. Finding meaning, purpose and
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fulfillment and it is not always easy and it does not always make you happy when you're sleep deprived
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or when you haven't been able to do anything for yourself for eight hours but it's so amazing to
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know that you are raising a person and that person is yours. So that is a little summary of all of the
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thoughts I've been having but I'm going to be sharing so much more about my motherhood journey
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but I wanted to kind of start off this portion, this part of my life on my channel by answering
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your guys' questions about where I'm at now and what motherhood is teaching me and all of that stuff.
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I will definitely be doing a birth story video on my channel. I'm really excited to share that with
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you guys. It did not go entirely as planned but it was still, you know, something I'm really proud of
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and I don't look back on it and think that it was traumatic or anything like that. There was a
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little bit of that feeling right after it happened but oxytocin is a miracle hormone that makes you
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forget everything terrible and I remember thinking at the next day after I had given birth like,
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oh my gosh, I'm going to have to do this again at some point in my life. I'm going to have to do this
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a bunch of times because I want a bunch of kids and now I'm like, yeah, I can do this again.
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And it's really funny where your brain just kind of is like, it was fine. It was a day and that's it.
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So that's kind of a funny thing and I'm excited to share that story with you guys. But there were
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some questions specifically regarding our birth story and I'm not going to be sharing all that
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much about it here because I'm going to be doing a whole video dedicated to it. But before I do that
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video, I'm actually going to be sharing that birth story as a podcast on my sub stack. So if you are
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new to my channel, first of all, I would love if you would subscribe and hit that notification bell
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so you can follow along with my motherhood journey as well as learn about being classic
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and embracing traditional values. So that's what we do here. It's not just motherhood content. It's
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definitely going to be a mixture. I love talking about dating and relationships, but I also love
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talking about marriage and motherhood. So please feel free to hit that subscribe button and join the
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classic crew. But I'd also love if you would consider subscribing to my sub stack newsletter where you
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will get access to a ton of exclusive content not available here or anywhere else. So I do a weekly
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article, I do a podcast, and I also have a book club and discussion threads. It's really cool over
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there. Right now it's on pause because I'm technically on maternity leave. So even if you sign up now, you
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will get access to all of my other content, but your payments will be frozen. So you won't actually have
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to pay. So maybe check that out. It might be worth it for you to sign up now because I'm pausing
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everybody's billing so that nobody's getting billed for this period of time where they're not getting
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content. But it is a really cool place, and I'm planning on sharing my birth vlog there first. So if
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you want to hear it before anyone else, then sign up for my sub stack. Okay, now let's get into today's
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video. Okay, so we're going to try and get through as many questions as possible in as short of a time as
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possible because now that I have a baby, I have very little time, and I have to make sure that I
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am available when he's hungry or when he needs to nap or whenever he needs to play or when he needs
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to go for a walk or have a bath or whatever else it is. So I am kind of on a clock here, so we're
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going to do this pretty quickly. So the first question is, how is breastfeeding? I just became a mom nine
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days ago, and breastfeeding is challenging. So breastfeeding is going really well, thank God, but it was not
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easy at the beginning. I had a lot of thoughts about that too, and I, again, want to share this
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in a different video, like five things I learned in the first five days of being a mom. But breastfeeding
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is not easy, but it's not your fault. It's the baby. The baby needs to learn. That's what I figured out.
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It's so much not about you, and it's really about the baby trying to figure it out. Initially, the nurses
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were like, oh, he's doing a good job latching, but I felt like I wasn't getting as good of a latch
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as I wanted to, and he was kind of sleepy, and it was a little hard when I was in the hospital.
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And then when we got home, when my milk came in, I got really engorged, and he just couldn't latch.
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It was just too hard. So I actually gave him a bottle of my pumped breast milk at like three days
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because he just was having such a hard time latching. But then the next day, after having
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pumped, he was really getting better at it, and now I'm not pumping. I'm just exclusively breastfeeding.
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I will start pumping and giving him probably one bottle every so often just so that he's
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used to it so that if we need to go somewhere, he can feed when I'm not around. But it has
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gotten so much better, and it's really something that I love to do with him. But it is not always
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entertaining. Initially, I was like, oh, this is easy. This is great. I can watch a show.
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I can relax while I do it. But he'll fall asleep at the breast, and if I want him to get a full
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feeding in, then I really have to keep him awake, which takes a lot of my attention, and it can be
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kind of exhausting. But I'm spending time with him, and that's a really special thing.
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But if you're having a hard time with breastfeeding, don't feel bad. It's hard for everybody,
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I think, the first time. I had the best lactation consultant. If you find that your lactation
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consultant is driving you crazy or making you feel bad, find a different lactation consultant
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because the one that I'm working with, that I worked with, was a godsend. She was incredible.
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She made me feel so good about what I was doing and what I was trying to do, and it made me feel
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so much better. So definitely a really special experience and something that I'm enjoying right
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now, but it's also not easy at the beginning. Like, give yourself a little bit of time to adjust.
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Give your baby a little bit of time to adjust. What's been harder, birth or postpartum healing?
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Birth was harder. Postpartum healing was not so bad for me, thank God. I felt like it wasn't terrible.
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It was not comfortable, but it wasn't so bad. Birth was not easy for me, but it was, you know,
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like I said in the intro of this, it was still really something I'm proud of, but it wasn't easy
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at all. Postpartum healing has been better. The postpartum period has been hard, or it was
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initially. That first week was really hard of adjustment, but now things are getting a lot
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Do you find it difficult to eat enough? I thought that was a very funny question, because
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yes, it's difficult to find time to actually get food and make food, because once he goes
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down, he doesn't always stay down, and then you have to pick him up, and you're trying to
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take care of him, and trying to prepare food is really difficult, unless I wear him. If I'm wearing
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him, then it works, but I don't want to wear him all the time, because I want to get him
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used to sleeping in the bassinet. So yes, it's difficult to get enough food.
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Have you had any stress breakdowns or depression despite all the support? Thank God I haven't
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had any depression. I wouldn't even say I've had stress breakdowns, but I've definitely been
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overwhelmed and felt like, what am I doing? How did this happen? What am I supposed to
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be doing right now? Why isn't my baby doing what he's supposed to be doing? But things have
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started to balance out, and it's all highs and lows. There are days where it's a lot harder.
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There are days where it's a lot easier, but something that my sister told me is just that
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every day is different, so don't expect anything to be the same from the day before. So if you
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have a good day, that's really nice, but don't expect it to be the same the next day. If you
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have a bad day, that's okay, because the next day will be different. I think that's just a
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What has surprised you most about postpartum? That is a good question. Hmm, I think initially
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I was surprised at how, like, manual labor it is. Like, in the sense of you think, oh,
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it's recreational. I get to play with my baby. My baby's so cute. No. Like, yes, that's part
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of it, but more than that, it's like, I have to get him to feed. I have to change his diaper.
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I have to get him to sleep, and it's like all very important that you take care of your
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child, and the playing and the enjoying of him is important as well. Actually, it's in many
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ways more important, but initially I was in this mindset of, like, I have to make sure
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he's eating enough. I have to make sure he's getting changed. I have to make sure he's
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sleeping enough, and it took the joy out of things for me initially, which was not the
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best thing for me, but it also, I mean, that is part of it, is that it's not just fun and
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games. You're trying to keep this little person alive, and I think that kind of shocked me
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initially with the postpartum experience. What's your favorite part so far? That's a nice question.
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I mean, when he sleeps on you, it's the cutest thing ever, and it's just so, it's so cute. When
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he has looked up at me when I'm singing to him, I will just start crying, and then I can't finish
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the song, and it's really, um, it's just beautiful. I like, there's a lot that's really special about
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it. Just holding him, and enjoying him, and knowing that he's my son. That's a really special
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thing. How has the baby affected you and your husband's relationship? You know, our relationship
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hasn't changed, but our dynamic, in a sense, has changed. Like, our feelings towards each
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other are the same, but we are just navigating this whole new life together, and so much of
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my attention is on the baby, because that's, he needs me, um, and that, that I feel guilty about
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sometimes, is that I'm not as invested in my time with my husband. I also recognize this is very much
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a stage of life, and it's going to pass, um, but I think that the biggest thing is just kind of
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navigating your time, and making sure that your spouse feels that you love them, even if you don't
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necessarily have that much time to give to them, and that has been a challenge for me, is just
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giving my attention to my husband, even if it's in small bursts, because you're tired, and you're not
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as focused, um, but we've been taking walks together when we take the baby, or my mom has helped so much,
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oh my god, I can't even express how incredible my mother has been. She's been here for a month,
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she will be here for a month, um, she was supposed to be here for two weeks, but then my baby got a
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cold, which was really scary, um, so she stayed for an extra two weeks while he recovered, and that was
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so, I'm so grateful to her, but it also has been such a blessing just generally having her here, because
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she can help take care of the baby, and she's been able to watch him, so that we can, you know, go for a
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walk, or go to dinner just for an hour, so that we can have that time together, and we know that
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this is a luxury that we will not have when she's not around, so it's been really special having her
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here, but I think that, like, the most important thing is having open lines of communication. We have
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talked so much during this period, just being really open and honest with each other, because it's easy
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to snap at one another when you're exhausted, or when you just don't have the mental energy to spend
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on one another, and we've been so careful about trying to avoid that, and then if it does happen,
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talking to each other, so that we both feel like, okay, it was just a momentary, you know,
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whatever it is, and we're just tired, and it has nothing to do with our love and our marriage, so our
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marriage has been really good, actually, but slightly different in the dynamics of it. We don't have
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time to just watch a show together, or if we do, it's like 20 minutes of a show, and then I have to go.
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Has your baby shown any signs of his personality coming through yet? It's a good question. I mean,
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I think he's very sweet. He's a very sweet boy, and he is very stubborn in certain moments,
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but mostly he's just sweet. He's not a hard baby. He's really a very, very good baby, and I'm very
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blessed. Has baby Roth brought your hubby and you closer together? So this kind of is like a follow-up
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of the last question, but yeah, I think in some ways he really has. We are kinder to each other.
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When we have those kind of like, I'm like in a bad mood, we forgive each other so readily and so
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quickly because we know that we're both so tired and that we're both just working so hard to keep
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this baby going. So I think there's a lot that has brought us closer together, and seeing your husband
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be a father and him seeing me as a mother, it's such an attractive thing to care for a person
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together, and that has really brought us together. Have you changed your mind on anything since having
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your son? I mean, the only thing I've been thinking about lately is just like, oh, I used to say you
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could have 10 or 15 minutes to do your makeup. No, you have maybe five. You don't know when that
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baby's going to wake up and you're going to be half done with your face. So it's all these things of
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like, I didn't realize how much time you wouldn't have as a mom, and I think maybe that was something
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that I needed to learn, and I think it'll also change again. This is a phase of life, and as he gets
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older, things will get a little different, but it's funny. It's not... like, time is now a huge
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commodity. Like, taking a shower for me is taking care of myself. I'm like, oh my gosh, I just need
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a shower. I just need five minutes, and that to me is taking care of myself, and it used to be like,
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oh, I'm gonna take, you know, two hours and go get my nails done. No. A shower is good.
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How to balance marriage time with motherhood? So many sacrifice one or the other. I think it's
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interesting. So many guys are asking questions about my marriage because it is so important.
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It's something that we are focusing on and making sure to be really careful about because it is so
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easy to prioritize motherhood and then to make your spouse not feel loved, and so I really am trying
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to balance that and express it as much as I can to Jacob. I will tell him, you know, how much I love
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him, and I will do my best to take care of him in small ways because right now big ways are just not
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going to happen, but I want to share my love with him in even in small ways just so he knows that he
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really is... he and my baby are like top priorities, but it's always really important. One of my philosophies
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is that babies are going to feel most safe if your marriage is strong. So making your marriage less
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important than your relationship to your child is a terrible idea. The baby's going to feel stable and happy
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and good if the marriage is good. So that's why I've been so intent, we've been so intent on making sure
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our marriage stays strong even when he's this little because he needs to know that his parents are happy
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and love each other and take care of each other. Is your baby up all night too? Not really, but getting
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him to sleep in the bassinet is not happening. So has the baby's health worried you in any way?
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I'm 13 and really inspired by your words. Yes, because he had a cold at two weeks. We went to the ER,
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we went to the pediatrician. He had a cold. It wasn't terrible, but it was really scary initially and I was
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just terrified of having him sleep in the bassinet because he's so little and I just didn't want him
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to have any issues breathing. So that was really, really scary. But he's doing so much better, thank
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God. Thank God. And I just feel really blessed that he's doing so much better. What is a typical day like
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now? What's changed and what have you been able to keep the same? A typical day is totally different
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than what it used to be like. Waking up at 7 30, depending on the day, between 6 30 and 7 30,
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feed him, little bit of wake time. Oh, there he is. I think it's time for me to go feed him.
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Okay. It's been a while. I fed the baby. We gave him a bath. We put him down for a nap. So let's get
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back to these questions. But this is what I feel like filming is going to be for a while, is me running
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back in here after having gotten the baby down to sleep for a bit. So still got my baby monitor
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here. He's looking good. He's in the bassinet, which is exciting. Okay. Let's get back to these
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questions. I probably got interrupted and I'm sorry if I didn't finish it. I don't remember what
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question I was on, but let's continue. How was picking the name? So Jacob and I are pretty in
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agreement about names that we like. And so we came up with a list together and we just found one that
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we liked the inspiration of. We are not sharing his name online. We don't want people to know, but
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we love his name. We love his name. What items in your hospital bag did you actually end up using?
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And congrats. So tell me if you guys would be interested in seeing a video like what I actually
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used in my hospital bag, I feel like I used a good amount and I don't regret having packed anything.
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So if that tells you something. But I probably also didn't use a lot of it, but I'm still like not mad
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that I packed as much as I did. How has your perspective changed after becoming a mom? Um, you know,
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my perspective has changed in the sense that this is the only job that matters. My perspective has
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changed in that motherhood is the most important thing you can do and it is the most time-consuming
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thing you can do. So anything that gets in the way of it, I'm less and less inclined to promote.
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I just think that it is the most important job I will ever have and I'm going to, uh, make sure that
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I can do it as well as I can. But I also think that part of being a good mom is taking care of yourself
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and it's something that I promote here on my channel, not the idea of self-care, but the idea
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of taking care of yourself. Um, and I differentiate between those two things. I've done videos like
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that on my channel before, so you can check those out. But taking care of yourself so that you can be
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a good mom is really important. And if that means that you have an outlet like I have here on YouTube,
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then that's great. You just have to make sure that you've got your priorities in line. As usual,
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what's one thing no one warned you about that you feel expecting moms should know?
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So the thing I want to say about this is that I don't think anything anyone can say is going to
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change an expecting mom's perspective before she has a baby. Like you just don't know. Um,
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being pregnant is all anticipatory. It's all about what's going to happen and you don't even realize
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that it's that anticipatory until you have the baby and you're like, oh, this is what we were working
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towards. So I think the thing that's the most important thing to recognize is at the beginning,
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don't try and be a baby administrator. I said this on my, on my Instagram stories. I got really like
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stressed in the first couple days about trying to, um, make sure he was eating and feeding and sleeping
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and all these things like to a point where I couldn't just enjoy him and snuggle him and love him
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and just like let him be. And there's the stress, really the stress of breastfeeding can drive you
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crazy because you know that he needs what he's getting from you. And if he's not getting it from
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you, he's not going to get it anywhere. So that's a really stressful thing. Um, and I think that it's
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really important just to remember that millions of people have babies and they survive and you're doing
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your best and your baby's going to be fine. You just need to chill out a bit and, um, give yourself
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the permission just to enjoy the baby. How did you prepare for the first few weeks before giving birth
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to ease the transition? Um, the most important thing I did was I cleaned the house every single night
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before, uh, we gave birth because I knew that there was a chance I could go into labor at any time.
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And I wanted to make sure that when we got home, the house was clean. That was the best thing I did.
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And I'm so glad I did it. Cause when we came home, the house was not a mess. Uh, the house is a mess
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now. So that's just part and parcel. I think of not having very much time. Um, but let me think,
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what else did I do? I mean, I read a lot of books about how to kind of get your baby on a schedule
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and do all these things. And I think there are really good benefits to being prepared, but there's
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also the knowledge that your baby is not going to just go to sleep in his bassinet. Like it's not
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just put the baby down and he'll be fine. Like you can't assume that everything you want your baby to
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do, your baby's going to do. So I went in being like, oh yeah, I'm just going to put my baby down
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in the bassinet and it'll be easy. Of course it's not easy. Babies don't want to be in a bassinet.
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They want to be in your arms. Um, and I think that it can make you feel like a failure when you
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read these books that are like, yeah, you just do this. You just do that. You just, you don't just
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do anything as a mother. Um, everything is always up in the air and you have to be really flexible.
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So I think that the biggest thing, um, about motherhood is be flexible, be prepared that nothing
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is going to go the way that you expect that day. And even if you don't get your one item on your
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to-do list done, that's okay. Personal care. I take personal hygiene really seriously,
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but I know some new moms who really neglect their personal care and hygiene and it scares me.
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Tips. Uh, take a shower every day. Take a shower every day. Even if the baby has to cry for a couple
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of minutes, he will be fine, but you need to take a shower every day. It makes you feel better. It makes
00:22:56.380
you feel refreshed. Give him to your husband, put him down for a nap, put him in the swing, put him in a chair.
00:23:01.980
Just find those five minutes every day to shower. You will feel cleaner. You will feel better.
00:23:07.900
And even if it's not about, um, kind of putting on makeup or styling your hair, being clean makes
00:23:14.460
all the difference. And if you have a spit-uppy baby, which I do, I have a happy spitter,
00:23:19.980
um, you need to shower every day or you smell terrible. So, uh, definitely recommend showering every
00:23:26.860
day. And you don't have to make it a long indulgent shower. It can be five minutes, but it just makes such a
00:23:31.020
huge difference. And every night when you go to sleep, take those couple of minutes to really
00:23:35.500
take care of yourself. So, you know, take out your contacts, brush your teeth, put on some lotion.
00:23:40.540
And again, it doesn't have to take a long time for you to feel taken care of. I make sure in the
00:23:47.980
morning because it makes me feel put together, um, that I put on my makeup. And that is like part of
00:23:53.500
my to-do list. It is put on makeup. So when he goes down for his morning nap,
00:23:58.140
he may not sleep that full hour or hour and a half that I want him to. He may only sleep for
00:24:03.100
half an hour. So what I try and do is I, I go and, uh, I eat breakfast. I wash my face. I put on
00:24:08.060
clothes and I, and I put on makeup and all of those things need to take five minutes so that I can get
00:24:12.460
it all done in 30 minutes just in case he wakes up. But it makes a big difference to how I approach the
00:24:17.660
rest of the day. So taking a shower and making sure that you actually, um, take that morning period and
00:24:25.900
prepare yourself physically for the day. I think that makes a big difference. Also taking a walk
00:24:31.420
every day if you can makes a difference. Who do you think Baby Roth looks like more? Is it pretty even?
00:24:36.940
I think he probably looks a little bit more like me, but he does have, you know, a mixture of the
00:24:41.500
two of us. I know it's early, but any funny baby stories yet? So sort of, um, every time we change
00:24:50.780
his diaper, there is a risk that he will spit up poop while we are wiping him and pee on the wall or at
00:25:00.060
you. And it's usually all three at once. Uh, they usually all happen at the same time and you are kind
00:25:06.060
of like, Oh my God, this is crazy. And it makes me laugh hysterically. And I also think that it's
00:25:12.220
fantastic because it means that my baby's getting everything he needs. He's getting enough that he's
00:25:16.940
peeing and pooping and spitting up regularly and gaining weight like a champ. So that is all good.
00:25:22.860
I'm always happy when he actually does all those things because it means he's healthy and he's growing.
00:25:28.380
Does it ever get easier? So I'm still early, right? I'm, uh, three and a half weeks out from having given
00:25:33.980
birth. And even this early, I can say yes. Um, every week, it's like a week marker gets easier
00:25:41.420
and easier and easier. You start to feel more yourself. You start to accept how flexible you
00:25:48.300
have to be. You start to accept the new schedule and it does make a difference. So yeah, it does get
00:25:54.140
easier. What was the most unexpected change your body went through? I got stretch marks right at the
00:25:59.980
end. I didn't think I would. I actually didn't get them for like the entire pregnancy. And then the
00:26:05.820
last couple of weeks, I got a lot of stretch marks on my belly. Um, and initially I was really sad. I
00:26:11.580
was really sad. And then I had the baby and I could not care less and I'm putting bio oil on it to just
00:26:18.300
kind of make things fade a little bit. But I had a baby, like my body changed and that's okay. Uh, I've also
00:26:26.380
probably got about 10 pounds to lose. Um, so I, I'm not rushing it. I'm planning on doing my daily
00:26:33.500
walks and I need to start eating healthier because at this point I'm just kind of eating what I can
00:26:37.900
eat in those few minutes that I get them. Um, I need to start kind of making a meal plan so that
00:26:42.620
whatever I eat is, is good for me and good for my breast milk supply and good for the baby. Um,
00:26:48.540
but I, you know, those are the, probably the biggest changes my body went through. And so
00:26:53.020
I, I'm fine. I'm fine with it. I grew a healthy baby and that's what was important.
00:26:59.180
Are you feeling more exhausted or still excited about this little human you made?
00:27:02.700
Uh, excited. Uh, at the beginning I was exhausted. I was really exhausted.
00:27:08.380
But now, you know, I, one of the things I've accepted is napping when the baby naps is not a
00:27:14.060
thing for me. Um, especially at the beginning, I think there's this huge pressure at the beginning
00:27:20.700
when you have a baby to sleep when the baby is sleeping and you have so many hormones,
00:27:25.020
so many anxieties, so many worries, you're not going to sleep. So trying to force yourself to
00:27:31.900
sleep is such a stressful thing. Now, some women might be able to sleep. I personally couldn't,
00:27:36.380
I couldn't sleep and it was stressing me out to no end that I couldn't sleep. And so I was also
00:27:42.300
feeding the baby, putting the baby down or giving the baby to somebody else.
00:27:46.460
And I wasn't ever enjoying my snuggles with the baby. And so what I've, what I've learned is that
00:27:51.820
if you're not going to be able to sleep anyway, sit and hold your baby. Hold the baby while he
00:27:55.820
sleeps. That's okay. At the beginning, it's really fine. It's not going to mess up his sleep schedule.
00:28:00.780
Hold your baby while he sleeps. And if you can't sleep, that's the best thing to do because you're
00:28:05.420
getting those love hormones. You're feeling so much better than trying to force yourself to sleep
00:28:09.420
when you can't and feeling like a failure that you didn't sleep. Um, so I was exhausted at the
00:28:15.020
beginning and also trying to force myself to sleep when I couldn't. Whereas now I don't really take
00:28:20.780
a daily nap unless I'm absolutely exhausted. And I do my best to sleep well in those few hours in the
00:28:27.260
night that I can. Um, we don't have a night nurse. I saw someone had asked if we had a night nurse,
00:28:31.740
but my mom is here and she's been helping with the baby at night. So I know when she leaves,
00:28:35.580
this is all subject to change because she's been really helpful in the nighttime with me. And so
00:28:41.740
has Jacob. Um, but we'll see how things play out. Okay, last question. I am 23 and I'm afraid I won't
00:28:51.340
be able to easily slip into the role of a mother. I am told it comes naturally. You know, it does come
00:28:59.100
naturally in the sense that you will take care of your baby. Like that is, is very innate to us as
00:29:05.660
women. All of a sudden you're like, okay, I know what I gotta do. I gotta feed him. I gotta change
00:29:09.100
him. I gotta put him to sleep. Like those are the three things you gotta do and snuggle him and enjoy
00:29:14.380
that. But the first few days after you have a baby are so hard and you just need to give yourself grace.
00:29:21.740
You're tired. You're recovering from this huge thing that just happened with your body and your,
00:29:27.660
your life is totally different. It will never be the same. Anything that you thought you knew about
00:29:33.580
life is, is not applicable. Like you do not have time. You do not have the luxury of just chilling out
00:29:42.700
or making yourself a beautiful dinner or anything like that. Like it just will not happen. And you're
00:29:50.780
okay with it because you have this beautiful child, but there's also like this feeling of,
00:29:55.580
oh my gosh, what did I just do? And one of the things my husband said to me,
00:30:02.780
which may sound controversial, but actually was very comforting was I was like, what did we do?
00:30:08.300
This is crazy. This is so much. I'm so tired. And he said, you know, this isn't a choice. This is life.
00:30:17.740
Having a baby is something you do is something people do. And once you accept that, and once
00:30:23.660
you accept that, it's not like, oh, I chose to have a baby. We have this stupid notion nowadays that
00:30:30.300
you can choose whether or not you have a child when you know, 99.9% of women would like to have a baby.
00:30:37.180
Um, and those very, very few women have kind of made this question available to,
00:30:43.580
to us of like, oh, do I want children? You know, this feminist idea that so many women don't want
00:30:49.260
children. And that's just not true. Most women do. And we then are put in this position of like,
00:30:55.980
we get to choose because of birth control and abortion. No, you don't choose to have child.
00:31:01.580
That is part of living. That is the most important part of living. And once you accept that that's the
00:31:06.300
case, you can be like, yeah, it had to be this hard. It had to be this difficult because this is
00:31:12.940
what meaning is. This is what fulfillment is. This is what purpose is. And that's good. It's good to
00:31:18.540
have those, those struggles so you can grow and so that you can do this thing that's so important.
00:31:24.940
And, uh, yeah, it is the most important thing that I've ever done and that anyone can ever do to have
00:31:31.740
a child. And it is not a choice in the sense that it is part and parcel of being human. You've, you,
00:31:39.740
you've got to do it. You've got to do it. So, and it's great. It's, it's amazing. It's, it made,
00:31:46.060
it's made me so much more of a person than I ever was before. Uh, you don't know what life is until
00:31:52.380
you're living it for another person entirely. So that's it. I'm a mom and baby is sleeping well
00:32:01.180
in his bassinet. I'm so proud of him. Uh, and that is, that is today's video. So thank you guys so
00:32:06.060
much for watching. I hope you guys enjoyed it. If you aren't subscribed to my channel already,
00:32:10.300
make sure to do so and follow along for more of this kind of content, as well as my
00:32:14.700
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00:32:19.500
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