Chanale On Judaism Vs. Christianity, Conservatism, And Making Music In A Religious World ⧸⧸ Ep. 5
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Summary
Talking with Hanala, the host of The Weekly Squeeze, all about conservatism, the differences between Judaism and Christianity, and how she transitioned from music to podcasting, just like me. All this and more on today s episode of The Classically Abbey Podcast.
Transcript
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Talking with Hanala, the host of The Weekly Squeeze, all about conservatism, the differences
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between Judaism and Christianity, and how she transitioned from music to podcasting,
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just like me. All this and more on today's episode of The Classically Abbey Podcast.
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Hello, and welcome to The Classically Abbey Podcast. I'm so glad you're here. Here we
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talk about classic living, traditional values, and modern femininity. If you aren't already
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subscribed to the podcast, make sure to do so and leave a review on Apple Podcasts. Today,
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I'm interviewing Hanala from The Weekly Squeeze Podcast, and I'm so excited you are here. Thank
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you so much. It is my pleasure. I'm thrilled. Hi, Abbey.
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We made a connection, and now you are online, and I'm so excited to have you here. If you
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are new to the podcast, we have generally three or four segments. When I have an interview,
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it's three segments. We do an interview, and then we follow that up with a faith talk,
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and we finish up answering premium subscriber questions to my sub stack. So let's just get
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right into the interview. I want people to get to know you. I want people to know who
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you are, and I think that you're such an interesting person. So let's start there.
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Can you tell my subscribers a little bit about yourself, how you got started in podcasting,
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All right. So my name is Hanala. I'm a Floridian, born and raised. I grew up in Miami Beach, Florida,
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typical American. Long story short, after having a traditional Jewish education, I ended up in New
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York City looking for my husband. I was officially on the dating market, and because New York is such
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a hub for singles, and it was even back in the day, 15 years ago, 20 years ago, I moved into an
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apartment there, and I just started serial dating. That was the process.
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And then, much to my parents' dismay, I met someone that I was not set up with. He was working
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on 47th Street, but he was my bashert. He was my destined one, and it took a while until my parents
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accepted that maybe it wasn't exactly what they had in mind for me. But here we are all these years
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Yes, it worked out. So we lived in New York for a while, and then after I had my first three kids,
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my first three girls, I said, I cannot take this anymore. I'm moving to Florida. And I moved back
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to Florida, and we bought a house, and everything was terrific. And then the 2016 election rolled
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around, and I was just like, I was really, really like entrenched. Like, I think I lost part of my
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eyesight just from Twitter alone. Like, that's how, like, obsessed I was. And at some point, we were
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sitting outside one night looking up at the stars, and I said to my husband, you know, I know you're
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Israeli, and I know you don't want to go back, but I think we should make Aliyah. I think we should
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move to Israel. And that is pretty much what we did. And I brought my, I mean, people said I was
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crazy. Like, you're going to kill your music career. But, you know, God has a way to help
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everyone no matter where they are. And here we are, and my music career is thriving, and the podcast is
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doing well, you know, as well. So, yeah, I've, you know, followed my destiny, I would say.
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And you asked me what my, yeah, you asked me what my mission is. Well, as a singer, my mission was
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always multi, multi-leveled, or, you know, there are a lot of things that were important to me.
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First of all, obviously, sharing, like, Jewish tradition and my culture through music. And I
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performed all over the world for all different types of communities. So that was, like, really
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important that my music have a message. You know, my music always had a message. You know, bringing
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people together. As an observant Jewish singer, I want to, you know, create that sense of community
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wherever I go and connect people from all different backgrounds and beliefs. Music is obviously
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uplifting. You know, Jewish music, in particular, has always been used to, you know, evoke joy and
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comfort and inspiration. So I really tried to share those positive emotions with my audience.
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Educating people. You know, there's a lot to learn, not just from the music, but even in between the
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songs. When I used to speak and communicate, it was an opportunity for me to be, like, a bit of a
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teacher. So that was always fun. And then, you know, expressing devotion to God. Because, you know,
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we sing in the synagogue, and in all faiths, music is used to connect. It's just, it reveals a very
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spiritual side of you. And I always felt like I was able to express my love and devotion to God
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through song. So I would say that's pretty much my mission in a nutshell.
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I love that mission. That's incredible. I mean, music is so important to me, too. People know I
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am a professional opera singer. I haven't sung professionally in a little while, but that was
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what I did before I started Classically Abbey. And I think one of the things I've always talked about
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is how music is a universal language. No matter where, no matter what language you actually speak,
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True. Yeah. And I saw that time and time again, because I would go travel to different communities.
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Like, that was my job. I was a performing artist on the road, and I would walk into a room of people
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that I never met. And often they were different ages. They were different, you know, their religious
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affiliations were different. And as soon as I took up my guitar and started strumming, and everybody
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relaxed a little, like that instant connection was made. It was so powerful. And people used to tell
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me, you know, I'm, let's say, a leader in my synagogue for all these years. I give classes
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once a week. I've never seen my crowd so turned on as they were when you were singing. Like, it's so
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powerful. And I said, well, this is just what I do. And, you know, everything else just kind of
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happens because the power of music. Yeah. So what made you transition from music, or rather maybe not
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transition, because you're doing both, but in a sense, transition from music into podcasting?
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Okay, so I feel bad I didn't get into podcasting earlier. I don't know why. There was also a time
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when I felt that I didn't get into social media earlier. But I'm a little bit of a late bloomer
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in that sense. I remember, you know, thinking to myself, Facebook, Facebook, who needs it? And then
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everybody was on Facebook and Instagram, Instagram, who needs it? And then everybody was on Instagram
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and podcasting the same thing. So I kind of fell into it. Pretty recently, actually. And I think
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this is something we also have to unpack because your listeners might not know that Jewish women
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don't or observant Jewish women, Orthodox Jews, we don't sing for men. So I have never sung for a
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mixed audience. I've never sang for men before. I will share a funny story, though, quickly.
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You guys will appreciate. I once sang in Pearl Harbor. And it was an older crowd. And I looked
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out in the crowd. And I see in the back row, there's like an 80 year old woman with her 80
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year old husband. And I was like, Okay, I guess, you know, he slipped under the radar. And they came
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over to me after the show. And he was like, that was so amazing. That was so terrific. And his wife
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looks at me and she goes, Please forgive me. He thinks you're Barbra Streisand.
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I was like, Okay, we could, you know, I could, you can take that compliment. I could take that
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compliment. Exactly. But really, I don't I don't sing for men. Because of, you know, that there's
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actually a spiritual reason for that, which we could get into if you want. Yeah. Yeah. Okay.
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Yeah. I would love to, you know, I think it's always interesting for my listeners to understand
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where certain things that we do come from. Now, I didn't observe that I sang for men.
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And I have kind of some rabbinical opinions that lean a little bit more lenient on that topic. But
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I also know kolisha, which is the term for this of women not singing in front of men is very important
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for very for many women, and they consider it halacha meaning law. So can you explain the concept a
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little bit? Yeah, totally, totally. Okay, so men and women have a different criteria for sexual
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arousal. We know that, you know, hearing, and according to Jewish tradition, hearing a woman sing is
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sexually arousing for a man. And by sexual arousal, I mean, like, he's thinking of her in terms of her
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physical dimensions, as opposed to her spiritual qualities. So while it might be hard for a woman to
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imagine, to imagine such a thing, you know, the sages were very in tune with human nature, they were. And this
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rule has been kept by by Jews for 1000s of years, because men and women do have this different
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criteria for for sexual arousal. So with this in mind, you know, the Torah set up these barriers to
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protect society's moral fabric, essentially, and the emphasis was was placed to counter the reality
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of the man's weaker character in those areas. You know, hearing the pleasant melody of a woman singing
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could be an issue for a man. And therefore, we're what we do our best to refrain from exposing them
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to this erotic situation. Now, you could argue that, you know, things have changed, and we're in a modern
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world, and that sensitivity maybe has been lost, like the sensuality of a woman's voice. And that's,
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and there's room to, there is room to say that to suggest that. And like you said, different rabbis
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have different opinions. Yeah, I mean, I'll say, yeah, go ahead, you finish. But however, there is
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there is a story in Greek mythology, which I always found fascinating. I don't know exactly the details,
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but the sirens that were called the sirens, they were female seductresses, and they used to lure sailors
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with their voices. So the concept that men could be lured in by a woman's sweet voice, that's not,
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it's not crazy to, you know, that is the reality. So even though we might be, you know, enlightened
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today, if anything, you could even argue the opposite, that like, the media influence that
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has actually created this atmosphere where the sexualization of women and objectification of
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women is even stronger than ever. So, you know, and just to wrap it up, you know, people listening
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might be saying, well, what does that, like, if the men can't control themselves, why do the women
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have to suffer the restrictions? And ultimately, it's because we're all in this together, and we all
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have to do our share to help each other out. So, you know, it's in my advantage, it's in my advantage
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to help men keep things under control. It is in my advantage. And it just, and ultimately, it serves both
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men and women to avoid the situations which will lead to promiscuity. Yeah, so I think that that's
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exactly right. I mean, here, I'll explain a little bit about where I, where I stood at this in this
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point, and also where I agree with you, which is, I think women should be much more flattered by the
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idea that there is so there are so many things that we do that we don't even think about that are very
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attractive to men. And singing is one of those things. And that's a beautiful thing, right, that a woman
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can attract a man just through her voice. I'm always saying to women, like, stop being offended.
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That's a great thing that we can do that, right? And it's not, I mean, it's not a good thing that
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we've desensitized ourselves, desensitized people more and more over time, to things that should be
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attractive to one another, where what used to be attractive, maybe showing, you know, the upper thigh
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area, if you wore like a shorter skirt, or if your skirt rode up a little bit, now is like, who cares,
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because people wear short shorts and show the bottom of their, you know, bums with what they're
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wearing. And it's not actually better for relationships when we desensitize ourselves to
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the things that could cause us to be attracted to one another. So yeah, and it's not just a
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religious thing, you know, Bradley Cooper, I saw him on an interview, and he was talking about Lady
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Gaga, when they were singing the shallow, I remember what movie it was in. And he said that when she starts
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singing, the electricity in the room changes. And this is, it's not a religious thing. He just said when
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he said time stands still, when Lady Gaga starts singing, that's how powerful her voice is. And you could say
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that about Andrea Bucelli. But when a woman sings the, the, the, the power is just all the more greater,
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because she's, you know, feminine and beautiful and attractive and appealing and all those things.
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Yeah. So as far as my own practice of it, the thing that I came to, and I don't know where I stand on it
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now, but the thing that I came to was, you shouldn't be a stumbling block is kind of the
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idea, uh, which is sort of in line with what you were saying earlier. But if you are going to sing,
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it is more on the man not to attend. So that was my, the way I practiced it at the time. Um,
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but I understand a hundred percent the, the people who practice Colesia and take it seriously. It makes
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sense to me and I get it. And that's why I share my music on social media because I mean,
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the majority of my followers are women, but I can't, um, limit my career to that extent because
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of, of, of men who might be, you know, maybe not following the law or doing what they're not
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supposed to. And there might be men who don't follow that particular halacha and on, you know,
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and they're entitled and I'm entitled to share my music. So yeah, I think it works out great.
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I love it. I love it. And I'm so glad we got to have that discussion because I think it's really
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interesting as always to introduce people who don't know a lot about these Jewish laws to more
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ideas that they've never heard of and explain where they come from. So what, so that kind of leads into
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my next question, which is, you might know that many of my subscribers are Christian and I find
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they're often curious about the differences and similarities between Judaism and Christianity.
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So I figured I would kind of say my, what I think is the biggest difference
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and the biggest similarity. Um, and then I would love to hear your thoughts on that because I think
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it's so interesting from an Orthodox perspective. So for me, I think that the biggest difference
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between, between Judaism and Christianity is simply the fact that it's an ethnicity
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that for us, when we have a child, when a woman has a child, it's passed through the mother,
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whether that child is Jewish. And even if you're not a religious Jew, even if you don't observe the
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laws or even believe in God, you are still Jewish. That doesn't really exist in Christianity in the
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same way. But the biggest similarity is the values. I mean, they're called Judeo, Judeo-Christian
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values for a reason that we all are sharing these traditional values that are so important that make
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up, as you said, the social fabric of society like that, or rather the moral fabric of society
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that is so important. And I think that that's really the biggest overlap. So now I'd love to
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hear what you think. Okay. So I dug a little deeper because I really wanted to, you know,
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you really wanted to get to, and you gave me some food for thought because, you know,
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you gave me kind of an outline of what we might talk about. And when you mentioned Christianity,
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I said, well, what do I actually know about the differences? You know, I grew up Jewish. We
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didn't study Christianity. It's not something I know much about, honestly. So I went back to the
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original sin. So let's talk about the original sin for a second. Adam and Eve are in the Garden
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of Eden. God tells them not to eat the apple from the Tree of Knowledge, and they eat the apple.
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And we all know that they were evicted from the Garden of Eden, and that all ended quicker than,
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you know, one, two, three. So although the Christian idea does differ greatly from the Jewish idea,
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both concepts are... Actually, let me restart. So Judaism believes that the original sin
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had a significant cosmic repercussion in the world, and that Adam and Eve were created as perfect
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beings who were connected to God, and then they sinned, and they were separated from God. It created
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a separation between them. So Christianity views the original sin as like an irrevocable and like an
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unchangeable blemish, a blight on the human soul, making connection to God impossible,
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except through faith in Jesus. That's the core essence of Christianity. Judaism, on the other
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hand, teaches that the essence of the divine soul always remains untainted and holy. And the sin
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actually only introduced a secondary soul known as our animal soul, and that contains the drive for
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egotism and selfishness and hedonism and all the things that pull us away from God.
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So, you know, we learn in Judaism, this hopeful vision that we do have the freedom and the capacity
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to liberate ourselves and achieve a level of holiness and perfection and reconnection with God.
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And we could fight, you know, we can win over those negative forces and that through the Torah and
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through the actual practice of Judaism, we reconnect and we kind of, you know, tikkun olam is an expression
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that's been hijacked by the reformed community. But ultimately, it means to repair the world and bring it
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back to the original state that it was in, in the Garden of Eden. So that's why Judaism places such a strong
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emphasis on observance and practice and Christianity prior to prioritizes faith. You know, they talk a
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lot about faith. What's in your heart? What do you believe? Do you believe? Are you a believer?
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You know, observant Jews, we have so many commandments, 613 commandments. And like, you know,
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from the morning to the night, we're busy, preoccupied. You don't even have time to think. You don't even
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have time to believe. You know, God gave the Bible, God gave the Torah on Mount Sinai. And the Jews said,
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we will do and then we will hear. First, we're just going to do and God kept them busy. So I think the
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big, the biggest difference between Christianity and Judaism is the actual practice versus the faith,
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because you can be a Jew and never practice Judaism, and you still remain a Jew. But to be a
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Christian that has no faith, then, you know, you have to explore and figure out why you're lacking in
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that area. Does that make sense? Yeah, I think that's a great point. I love that. That's really,
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really fascinating. And I'm sure that our, my subscribers will, will let that, let us know
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what they think about that. Oh, by all means. Yeah, absolutely. I love that stuff.
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It's not about better or worse, by the way. It's not about better or worse. It's just a different
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approach. It's absolutely just a different approach. And I, I, I respect Christians and I respect
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Muslims and I respect all people of faith and people of not faith as well, or, you know, who don't
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believe, but ultimately we have to respect our differences and, you know, be honest about them.
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And that's exactly. And I was going to say, and I think that there's nothing wrong with drawing
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those comparisons as in a way to understand each other better so that we know where each,
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you know, where we're coming from. We, we all are, you know, doing our best to serve God. It's
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just a question of, you know, what that looks like. That's true. So you're a conservative woman.
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You're very open about it. So how do you feel that your faith informs your politics? I think a lot of
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people believe that Judaism, you know, they hear about Jews and they assume we're on the left
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because so many non-observant Jews are on the left, but that's really not the case for Orthodox
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Judaism. So how do you find that your Orthodox Judaism informs your beliefs as far as politics
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and conservatism? Right. So I really just got into politics actually when Obama was running for
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president. I remember looking at the TV and saying, he looks like a nice guy. And my husband's like,
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he's a Democrat. I'm like, who cares? He's cool. I was really not so into politics until a little
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later in the game. Like I said, I'm a late bloomer. But then when I got into it, it became a little bit
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of an obsession. But, you know, I think there was a Pew research, a poll or survey done rather in
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America. At this point, 75% of Orthodox Jews are overwhelmingly affiliating with the Republican
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Party. And I think that has a lot to do with Trump's handling of policy in Israel. I mean,
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it created a major shift. It was practically a revolution, you know, for a president to be
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so outspoken in his support for Israel, especially considering the climate in America where things
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have been shifting more and more in that sense. So I think that's, you know, definitely an issue
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because I'm in Israel. I'm an Orthodox Jew. I have a strong connection to the land. And I'm going to
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support the political parties that prioritize my country's security and my interests. That's just the
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reality of it. And also there's this element of religious conservatism, you know, Orthodox
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Judaism, the values, the traditional family structures, the social values, they really do align
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with right wing political ideologies. They do. You know, we take issue with liberal policies on
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abortion, gay rights, drug, you know, legalizing drugs. And that's just the reality of it. I don't
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like saying that I am a Republican and, you know, because there are things that don't maybe I don't
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identify with as a Jew. And I recognize that the Republican Party is flawed in many ways,
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as is the Democrat Party. So I'm not as patriotic anymore, perhaps because I don't live in America.
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But I would say my conservatism is intertwined with my, you know, Jewish values.
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Yeah, no, that makes sense. And that's why I often use the I would say I'm much more interested
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in culture than I am in politics. So I and that's really what I focus on in my in my chat,
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on my channel, on my podcast. And I talk about this stuff from a conservative perspective. I very,
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very rarely, if ever, use the term Republican because I much more align with conservative values
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than the Republican Party. Right. That's a very good point, actually,
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because I was actually thinking to myself, I don't even know if I'm a Republican anymore.
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I might be a libertarian. I just feel like I've kind of veered a little more center as I get older
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and I'm a little more open minded. And it doesn't. And I don't know, I don't really identify with a
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particular party. So I like that idea. I am conservative. And, you know, that that's basically
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what it all comes down to. Yeah, absolutely. So I want to talk a little bit about
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femininity, womanhood, motherhood. So I have two questions for you on that front. The first is
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you're a singer and a musician. You told us that you travel doing your doing your music.
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So how did you make that work as a religious Jew and as a wife and as a mom?
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Okay. So before I had kids, everything was la-di-da. I grabbed my guitar. I was at the door.
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And then once I had children, I remember getting on stage in my sequence with my,
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you know, my big, my shaito, my big wig. I cover my hair and, you know, you could just stick a curly,
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I have a curly wig. You could just, I just stuck it on my head and put on a pair of high heels.
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And suddenly I was Hamela the performer. It was like such a transformation. I remember laughing
00:22:58.320
and telling the audience an hour ago, I was on my knees giving my kids a bath. I literally kid you
00:23:03.120
not. Like that's how, that's how down to earth I was about the reality of it. There, there was no
00:23:08.880
rider that included a fancy green room with only green M&Ms and then all that, you know, you know,
00:23:15.200
filtered water, undistilled, like it's reality. You know, I would sometimes take a bus. I once
00:23:21.760
performed somewhere and I actually had to take a bus because my husband was working that night.
00:23:25.680
And when I got there, um, a little girl said, oh my God, you're Hamela. How did you get here?
00:23:29.920
Did you take a private airplane? I'm like, no, I took the bus. So there's definitely like this
00:23:34.400
reality check when you have children that no matter how big of a star you are, um, five minutes ago,
00:23:40.000
you were nobody. Like you were just somebody's mom, not nobody, but somebody's mom. And they didn't
00:23:44.720
care what, you know, what about your profession. So for me, like juggling being a singer and being
00:23:50.640
a mom, obviously, you know, there's the, the, the, the scheduling, like you have to work out
00:23:55.840
babysitters that my husband's around. I tried not to travel around the weekends. I could be
00:23:59.600
home for Shabbat. So that's, you know, my religious obligations obviously are a priority and they come
00:24:04.480
first. Um, and as far as like managing with the kids, it is a balance. It was really always a balance.
00:24:11.280
You know, um, I have to, I have to obviously make a living and do what I love and feel fulfilled.
00:24:18.960
But, um, there were times when, and even now, like I make, I make choices that, that, that work out
00:24:24.160
better for my family. Like my husband's been in America for the last few weeks and he's working.
00:24:28.800
And that means a lot of home time for me. And as a creative that could get rather stifling,
00:24:33.760
but I have to remind myself, I am a star in my own house. I am a celebrity to my children.
00:24:40.000
When I pay attention to them, I am their entire universe. So yeah, it feels great to have the
00:24:45.040
applause and it feels great to get dressed up and go out and people should clap for me and tell me
00:24:49.440
that I'm amazing. But when my little kid, you know, my little son, my baby, he's seven.
00:24:54.880
When he says to me, please, can you sing? You are my sunshine to me one more time before I go into bed.
00:25:00.080
And he just relaxes underneath my touch. I really feel such a warmth in my heart. It really does
00:25:06.400
match that, that high that I have after I sing. So for me, it was very much about being realistic,
00:25:13.360
um, being practical, um, and allowing myself to realize that, you know, maybe I'll never be
00:25:20.080
a multimillionaire with, you know, an Oscar or Grammy, but, um, I have so many things that
00:25:26.880
a lot of other singers don't, you know, their lives are so empty. They have millions of dollars
00:25:30.400
and no love, no family. Um, and you know, life is not so great for them. So I'm just trying to
00:25:35.280
remind myself what I do have. Yeah. I love it. So last question, sort of putting you on the spot.
00:25:40.720
Cause I didn't actually ask this question in our, in our outline that I had sent you, but
00:25:46.880
what, if you could describe femininity in three words,
00:25:50.000
what three words would you choose? I could not, um, think of a better question for me,
00:25:56.800
Hanala. And I'll tell you why, because my name is Hannah and Hannah in Hebrew is spelled with three
00:26:01.840
letters. Hey, the head in my name, or my, my name rather is an acronym. My name is an acronym for the
00:26:09.040
three most important commandments that a Jewish woman has. That is challah, which is, um, separating
00:26:15.280
the needed dough before you bake it. Uh, you know, this was in the times of the temple,
00:26:20.240
it was donated to the priests, the dough, um, a portion of the dough every week, um, nida,
00:26:25.600
which is the laws of family purity, which we don't have to get into, but anyone could do a quick
00:26:29.600
Google search for the Jewish laws of family purity and see what that's all about. But basically
00:26:33.760
it's separating when you have your period and going, um, for a ritual immersion every month. Um,
00:26:38.320
and then, um, the hay is hadlakat hanerot, which is lighting the Shabbat, the Shabbos candles or keeping
00:26:44.640
Shabbat. So for me, my femininity, a ties into my name, because halanita and hadlakat hanerot,
00:26:51.360
that's the acronym for Hannah, which is my name. Um, also my name actually means grace.
00:26:57.920
Chet nun, chen means grace and grace is a very feminine quality. So I grew up, um, in an Orthodox
00:27:05.520
home, but we were also Hasidim actually, and not the ones with the curly payas, but rather, um,
00:27:10.320
Chabad Hasidim and the Lubavitch Rebbe was a revolutionary leader in his approach towards
00:27:16.640
women in Judaism. And I grew up being encouraged to be a strong woman. My grandmother was a published
00:27:21.680
poet. My great aunt was a published recording artist. She was the first woman in, in the history
00:27:26.640
of Jewish music to create albums of, of children's music in the 1970s. We grew up listening to her
00:27:33.200
records. It had never been done before. I don't know if you know, know the song Hashem gave us a
00:27:37.040
present. Do you know what it was? He gave us the, you know what she wrote that song and all these
00:27:42.240
like little preschool songs. Yeah. So I grew up knowing that we can do anything, but at the same
00:27:46.960
time, we were taught very, um, specifically that it was because of the Jewish women that, that we were
00:27:55.600
merited to leave Egypt. It was because of the Jewish women, the crown of the Jewish popular, of the
00:28:01.920
Jewish people that we continued to, um, convey the important messages that were in the Torah and to
00:28:08.400
maintain our identity and to, you know, keep the chain, um, alive or keep our traditions alive and
00:28:15.200
keep the, you know, not break the chain. And for me, you know, tapping into my strengths as a woman
00:28:21.760
and living a life as a Torah Jew were always completely cohesive. I was never told to lower my
00:28:27.840
voice. I was never told to cover up and be quiet and go away. I was told be bold, be bright, be
00:28:34.320
feminine, be graceful, revel in the commandments, revel in the mitzvot that bring out your femininity.
00:28:40.960
And you will reap the benefits by having a, a great home, which I do. I have four great kids
00:28:46.160
and a loving husband, um, be a great career and see meaning and, and, um, fulfillment in my spiritual
00:28:53.120
life. So for me, I would have to say the three words are challah, nida, and hadlakat hanerot,
00:29:00.640
all Hebrew. So now let's get into our faith talk for the week. So this week's Torah portion
00:29:09.200
is b'shalach, which means when he sent as in Pharaoh sending the Israelites out of Egypt.
00:29:15.920
So I'm going to give a quick overview of, uh, this, of this week's Torah portion of the
00:29:21.280
Parsha that's that word in Hebrew in this week's Torah portion, the Jews are sent out of Egypt
00:29:27.760
by Pharaoh. God immediately takes them to the red sea, knowing that Pharaoh will believe that the
00:29:32.640
Israelites are lost and trapped in the desert. Because of that, Pharaoh is planning. He will
00:29:38.640
chase after the Jews regretting his decision to let them go. So Pharaoh does that. And the Jews
00:29:44.000
cry out to Moses asking why God took them out of Egypt only to have them die in the desert.
00:29:49.120
God splits the Red Sea and brings the Jews safely through it while the Egyptians plunge in after
00:29:55.280
them. But God brings the waters down upon the Egyptians and drowns them. The Israelites praise
00:30:01.200
God for saving their lives. After walking for three days without water, they come to Marah,
00:30:06.720
but the water is too bitter to drink. Moses throws in a piece of wood and the water becomes sweet.
00:30:12.080
After a month of wandering in the desert, the Israelites have run out of food.
00:30:15.520
God promises to bring them mana during the day and quails at night. Moses directs the Israelites
00:30:22.000
on the exact ways to gather the mana and many of them ignore his instructions. Later, they run out of
00:30:27.520
water again, and Moses hits a rock which issues forth water. At the end of this Torah portion,
00:30:32.960
the Jews fight Amalek, which is a group of people that's very, has a lot of notoriety in the Jewish
00:30:41.360
faith that we they're kind of like our lifelong enemy. And when Moses raises his arms, the Jews
00:30:47.520
begin winning the fight. But when he lowers them, Amalek wins. He sits down and two people support his
00:30:52.400
arms to keep them in the air and the Israelites win the war. So that is this week's Torah portion.
00:30:58.800
I don't know about you, but I love Exodus. I love Shmote. What do you totally? Yeah, right. It's so amazing.
00:31:03.840
Well, first of all, when we talk about it with our kids, it's the most, uh, you know, it's a story.
00:31:08.000
It's a beautiful story. I mean, the Prince of Egypt is just a phenomenal, uh, phenomenal film
00:31:14.160
because it's, there's, it's full of adventure and it's full of, um, drama and tension. And then
00:31:19.600
there's this redemption at the end and freedom of the slaves. I mean, it's just such a powerful story
00:31:25.040
for me. I personally love the part when the Jews come to the Dead Sea
00:31:28.480
and, uh, and it splits the Red Sea. I'm sorry. I live in Israel. So I'm thinking about the Dead Sea,
00:31:33.360
but the Red Sea splits and the Jews cross. And when they get to the other side, Miriam,
00:31:39.040
who's Moses's sister takes out her tambourine and she starts dancing and singing with the Jewish women.
00:31:44.480
And, and it's, it's so amazing because it's right there in the Bible, how the women use their voices
00:31:52.800
to inspire and to reinvigorate a nation that was dehydrated, exhausted. I mean, the fear that they
00:32:00.080
felt as Pharaoh's, you know, the Pharaoh's troops are approaching that they have, they would have to
00:32:05.120
go back to Egypt. You know, they were, they were Jews that didn't want to leave Egypt. They, you know,
00:32:08.720
where they were going or what was the, what the future held. So for them to have a moment of sheer joy,
00:32:14.960
when they could just let go and dance and celebrate and hold hands with their sisters and connect
00:32:21.040
and, and use their voices to praise God, I think it's one of the most powerful moments, certainly
00:32:25.840
um, in, you know, in, in the, in this, uh, in, um, in Shemot, in the book of Shemot of names. And,
00:32:33.360
um, it, it's something I've, I've sung about. It's something I've written music about. And for me,
00:32:38.640
that's why this particular parasha was always very special. This particular, um, you know, sedra of,
00:32:44.560
of Shemot. Yeah. I felt totally exactly the same way. I always loved that part as a singer,
00:32:50.080
as a woman, it always really inspired me because not only were they raising their voices
00:32:55.040
in, in song, it was in praise of God. And, and to me, that made it feel like anytime I raised my
00:33:00.880
voice in song, even if I wasn't singing a prayer, it was directly in praise of God for giving me this
00:33:08.240
voice for giving me this opportunity to sing. Yeah. Well, the music is, is an expression of
00:33:13.680
the soul. I mean, there's no question about that. I actually just had this conversation
00:33:16.880
on my podcast with a journalist named Eli Lake. He's really like square, you know,
00:33:21.920
he writes for Bloomberg, like really like, you know, one of those stiff, you know, professionals.
00:33:27.360
And then he starts talking about music and he tells me that he's a huge hip hop fan. I'm like,
00:33:30.880
I would never, ever have imagined that you like rap music. And he asked me if I feel that, um,
00:33:37.120
there's some sort of spiritual element in music. And I said, absolutely. Music is the pen of the soul.
00:33:41.440
And that's why you have the most, um, uh, well, obviously we could talk about classical music all
00:33:46.000
day because that's, you know, your specialty. We know that some of the music, the music pieces
00:33:51.040
created by these, um, that by, by these composers is just beyond comprehension, the sophistication of
00:33:58.560
it. I mean, this stuff could be analyzed for generations, generations to come can't compare to
00:34:04.320
some of the stuff that's coming out now. Um, but the reason for that is because the capacity to sing
00:34:10.800
is a godly quality. It really is. And I do think that it's something that we can tap into that could
00:34:16.960
create that connection. Sometimes you cannot, um, connect to God unless it's through a song,
00:34:21.760
unless it's through, you know, putting on, uh, uh, whether it's your favorite singer,
00:34:26.320
or if you're, if you're a person of faith and you go to church and you go to synagogue and they're
00:34:30.480
singing that, that hymn or that, you know, prayer that suddenly, you know, you feel emotional and,
00:34:36.400
and that's good. That's great that we're supposed to have those tools to help us in our service of
00:34:41.680
God. So I believe that a hundred percent talent is a gift and it's a godly one.
00:34:46.880
Yeah. I love that. And I totally agree. So we had a quick technical difficulty given that we are
00:34:53.280
recording around the world from each other, but we're back. And I want to talk about
00:35:00.480
the fact that the Jews don't trust in God after having all of these miracles done for them,
00:35:06.000
right? They just saw all of the plagues happen in Egypt. Like the most you could ever see God's
00:35:12.720
presence just happened to them. And then they spend this entire Torah portion complaining, whining,
00:35:19.680
showing fear, not trusting in God, right? Like it's so interesting that we see the Jewish people
00:35:27.040
who have just seen, and this happens throughout the Torah, right? We see them get, like they receive
00:35:32.480
the Torah or they're told they're going to receive the Torah. And two minutes later, they're like
00:35:36.000
building the golden calf, right? Like they just don't have that innate trust in them. So why?
00:35:41.760
So I think there's two parts to this. One is that it is human nature to forget the good quickly. When
00:35:49.440
something good happens to us, when we feel like God has given us blessings within two or three days,
00:35:55.440
like that fades, this is actually, it's interesting. I'm reading a book called The Happiness Hypothesis,
00:36:00.480
and it's called The Adjustment Principle. And the idea that we adjust to any circumstances very quickly
00:36:06.560
and go back to kind of like middle ground. So like, God does something amazing for us. We don't just
00:36:12.000
live our lives thinking, okay, God's going to continually do amazing things for us. We can
00:36:16.240
notice his presence. We can notice his miracles. Instead, we just kind of revert back to,
00:36:21.920
well, why isn't God doing something for me today? There must be something wrong.
00:36:25.920
As well, the Jews had been lowered and debased in Egypt and removed from their holiness and from
00:36:31.600
God's presence, which makes it easy for them to forget God's miracles, even after a few days when
00:36:37.680
they just saw, even days after they just saw it in full force. So how can we incorporate this into
00:36:43.520
our lives? And I want to hear your thoughts on it too. So I'm just kind of dropping all of my thoughts
00:36:47.920
first, but what can we learn from this? When something bad is happening, instead of complaining
00:36:53.200
that God doesn't care about us, we should try to remember God's miracles and pray from a place of
00:36:57.840
knowing God is there, rather than from a place of whining that God isn't doing things on our schedule.
00:37:04.240
But I think even more importantly and more relevant is that we're living in our own version of Egypt.
00:37:10.960
We are living in a world that is debased and that has so much bad going on that we have to
00:37:18.080
constantly kind of tune out. And it's important that we not lose our connection to God and not
00:37:24.640
lose our holiness. And it's our responsibility not to allow ourselves to become debased, but instead
00:37:31.680
to stay close to God's presence. So I just wanted to share that thought, but I'd love to hear your
00:37:36.880
thoughts on that. Like, how can we do that? How can we keep ourselves separate from everything
00:37:41.280
that we're constantly bombarded with, whether that be in media, movies, music, whatever,
00:37:46.480
and stay close to God? Right. Well, I think that when we
00:37:53.040
let's think about, let's say for dieting, for example, you know, the problem that people have
00:37:58.560
when they start dieting is that they're hungry the whole time. Like they just need to eat. And most
00:38:03.280
nutritionists will advise crowding out instead of thinking about what you're not going to eat.
00:38:07.680
Think about all the good stuff you're going to take in. You're going to have a huge salad and
00:38:11.120
you're going to have all these healthy proteins and you're going to satisfy yourself in that way.
00:38:14.640
So that emptiness is kind of filled because it's very hard just to say you can't do this and you
00:38:19.600
can't do that and you can't eat that because you are going to feel like something is lacking.
00:38:23.040
So I think that in general, you know, inspiration, it's fleeting because it's tied to all these
00:38:29.440
emotions and all these external factors that are always changing. Right. So people feel they're
00:38:35.360
they're motivated and you're inspired and you're in, you know, you're in the moment and then it kind
00:38:39.440
of fades away. So it's really hard to sustain those those high levels of inspiration and motivation
00:38:45.680
without a plan. You need a clear plan. You need actionable steps to turn the inspiration and turn the
00:38:52.240
ideas into reality. So if you want that inspiration to last longer, you have to anchor it like in values
00:38:58.640
and in goals and engage in activities and behaviors that bring joy and meaning to your life. And I
00:39:03.440
think when the Jews left Egypt, they hadn't received the Torah yet. They did not have a plan of action.
00:39:08.240
They didn't have concrete ways to manifest, to channel this inspiration and this gratitude.
00:39:15.040
So because they're humans and it's human nature, it came in really quickly and it went really quickly.
00:39:20.880
So I think the lesson we could learn is that when you are feeling those moments of inspiration,
00:39:25.600
don't assume you're going to wake up tomorrow ready to change your life because today you had,
00:39:30.080
you know, a great experience either in synagogue or reading a book or listening to an audio book,
00:39:34.000
we're all like jazz and excited. My life is going to change today. And then, you know,
00:39:38.080
bad habits just creep up one, two, three, you really have to put an action and plan
00:39:42.640
and have concrete steps that will keep you getting towards your goal and give you those little moments
00:39:48.880
of pride and success and, you know, gratification. And then the inspiration when it comes will only
00:39:54.480
boost your journey. Does that make sense? I love it. I think that's absolutely correct.
00:40:00.240
I like the idea of, they always say, you can't not do something. You can only do something.
00:40:07.360
So if you're trying not to do something, instead of saying, I'm not going to do that thing,
00:40:11.360
you say, I'm going to replace, it's exactly what you're mentioning. You're going to replace it
00:40:14.240
with a different action. And I think that's exactly right. And that's the way that we have to live our
00:40:18.560
lives in a positive manner. We have to do things that are good and fill our souls, our hearts, our
00:40:25.360
cups in with things that will keep us close to God, will keep us, you know, strong in our faith,
00:40:30.560
strong in our beliefs, even when we're surrounded by things that we're, you can't live on inspiration
00:40:36.160
alone. You cannot live on inspiration alone. Yes. It's got to be part of something bigger.
00:40:41.680
I love that. That's interesting stuff. It's a great conversation.
00:40:46.160
So now let's get into my premium subscriber questions. If you would like to submit questions
00:40:51.360
for podcasts, just like this, make sure to head over to classicallyabi.substack.com and become a
00:40:57.280
premium subscriber today. So let's start off with this question. And these were specifically for you.
00:41:04.720
So we've got a couple that are just specifically because people knew you were coming on.
00:41:08.400
So what regional differences are there between people who practice Orthodox Judaism?
00:41:14.800
When you mean, what do you mean by regional? So I think what she's talking about is the people who
00:41:19.840
are from Morocco practice differently than people from Germany around the world.
00:41:25.760
Okay. So obviously there's the, the major two groups of the Jewish ethnicity, which are,
00:41:30.720
which consists of Sephardim and Ashkenazim. So the Jews that came from the Middle East and North Africa,
00:41:38.160
those are the Sephardic Jews or the dark skinned Jews. And those range from, you know, Ethiopian or black.
00:41:43.840
And then, you know, my husband's Bukharian and he, he grew up in Uzbekistan on the border of Russia,
00:41:50.480
which is not the Middle East. But they are Sephardic Jews as well, originating generations before from
00:41:56.480
Persia. So you have the Sephardic Jews and then you have Ashkenazic Jews, like myself, the very
00:42:00.640
white ones who need to wear a lot of sunscreen. And we came from Western Europe, essentially. Now,
00:42:06.400
all Jews originally as our one tribe were in the land of Israel thousands of years ago,
00:42:13.520
but when we were expelled time and time again, and, you know, we ended up all in every corner of the
00:42:19.200
world. So as far as observance goes, you know, there's different ways to pronounce Hebrew. You
00:42:25.200
know, the, the, the Yemenite Jews, you could, you could barely understand them. Obviously there's
00:42:30.320
the language of Yiddish. A Yemenite Jew and a Hasidic Jew are so different in so many ways. They
00:42:35.040
really do. It's really hard to believe they're practicing the same religion. But ultimately they
00:42:40.960
aren't both committed to the letter of the law. It's more the personal traditions and the, you know,
00:42:47.280
the, the stuff that they've kind of passed on through generations that, um, kind of like flavor
00:42:53.120
their observance. Um, so you can't really mess around with like the, the hardcore basics, you know,
00:43:00.320
kosher is kosher, Shabbat is Shabbat, but what you eat on Shabbat and, you know, the style of food
00:43:05.360
that you like and the tunes that you sing and the way you read the Torah, the accent that you have,
00:43:10.080
those things definitely vary. But I think that's what makes the Jewish people so interesting. We're so
00:43:14.560
different. We're so unique. We're so diverse, but we have the Torah in common.
00:43:18.800
Yeah, no, I, I love the different traditions from around the world. And I think it's so cool
00:43:23.360
that as the Jewish people, we can look at somebody who's practicing something that maybe doesn't look
00:43:27.600
so similar to what we do and say, but you're still doing, you're still doing the right thing. It's just
00:43:32.080
a different version of it. So like, for example, on Passover, many Sephardim, Sephardic Jews, people
00:43:39.040
from like Spain and, you know, generally we, they're darker skin Jews. They have rice and they
00:43:46.640
have certain things that Ashkenaz Jews, kind of wider European Jews don't eat. And they're still,
00:43:52.880
they're both fine. It's just the tradition developed in a different way based on where they, where they
00:43:57.600
were living and, and kind of what the people were doing around them.
00:44:01.360
Yeah. I'm married to a Sephardic Jew and I eat rice on Passover and rice on Passover in my parents'
00:44:06.960
house is like blasphemy, you know, but I'm sitting pretty here. I have my peanuts and my bamba and all
00:44:12.720
the things that are like, you know, so delicious that we were restricted, um, uh, Passover from,
00:44:18.720
and, and there's nothing wrong with it. It's still as observant as the next Jew. So it's all good.
00:44:22.800
Yeah. It's amazing. I love it. Uh, another question that I got is I'm a reformed Jew and I struggle
00:44:30.320
with being a conservative in a reform synagogue as most of the people in my community are leftists.
00:44:35.840
Do you have any advice? Ooh, that's a good one. Okay. Let me think for a second.
00:44:41.040
All right. So first of all, you definitely want, you want to, you want to unite. So you
00:44:45.440
want to focus on your shared values. You know, you do want to see what you do have in common,
00:44:50.720
you know, identify and emphasize, um, the common values that you share with, with your synagogue,
00:44:56.880
cause that is your community. So you could find a space for yourself in social justice
00:45:01.680
and compassion and spirituality. So you definitely want to find the things that you have in common.
00:45:06.000
I would avoid all political discussion, honestly, like refrain from engaging in political debates
00:45:11.520
with people in your synagogue. That's not why you're there. You're there to, to worship,
00:45:15.760
not to discuss politics. Um, also, you know, the purpose of faith or one of the advantages of faith
00:45:23.280
is that we have this community building. So when you participate, like in all these synagogue
00:45:28.480
programs or these church programs, you know, when you do charity work or, uh, educational programs,
00:45:33.840
like cultural events, like those are the places that you build relationships with the people in
00:45:38.960
your community. So I would definitely, um, suggest trying to get involved more like hands-on and, and,
00:45:45.440
and, you know, find support outside of your synagogue, you know, find people that align with you,
00:45:49.840
your political beliefs that are not involved in the synagogue. Don't come into the show,
00:45:53.920
looking for someone to talk to about politics because you haven't had an opportunity all week.
00:45:58.480
And then, you know, just remember that we can always learn from other people and we can stay grounded
00:46:04.880
and maintain our sense of, you know, perspective, but be open-minded and, and learn from, you know,
00:46:12.560
we learn in ethics of our fathers, like who is wise, one who learns from, from all people. So,
00:46:18.080
so take a minute, listen, maybe you learn something. So funny. Yeah, no, I love that.
00:46:23.120
And I will say I have a slightly different perspective given that my husband grew up reform,
00:46:27.920
you know, he has shared with me just how far left the reform movement has gone. And I think the issue
00:46:36.640
you'll have to evaluate whether or not your practice of faith is still aligned with the people
00:46:45.600
you're practicing around because reform Judaism in many ways, it does not hold with traditional
00:46:52.480
values, with conservative values. And let's put it, I think people will appreciate this reformed
00:46:59.040
Judaism used to be progressive Judaism and now it's Jewish progressivism. So if you really feel like
00:47:06.240
Judaism is your priority, then it is time to move out of reform. And I do feel, I'll say it straight out,
00:47:11.600
like reform does not have a space for people at this point who are, who are observant like that.
00:47:17.920
They're not focused on the letter of the law. So if it's come to a point where you don't have
00:47:22.800
a relationship with the people in your synagogue and you, and you're not really connecting,
00:47:26.880
then maybe it is time to move on. Yeah, exactly. And that's exactly what I was going to say is that
00:47:31.440
it may be time for you to evaluate your practice of Judaism, what it means to you,
00:47:36.800
what's important to you, and then start maybe trying to attend a Chabad. That's usually my
00:47:42.960
my recommendation. My husband and I attended Chabad when we were living around the country.
00:47:48.880
And it was so wonderful to see so many different kinds of people there. And so you never have to
00:47:52.800
worry about feeling judged. It can just be a place for you to explore becoming observant in a different
00:47:58.320
way. And you will feel more welcomed there than perhaps where you are now.
00:48:05.360
Right. I agree. I totally agree. Yeah. So that is my advice for that. And I love your advice too.
00:48:11.360
So let's ask this question, which is, this is kind of a funny one. Do you have any advice for making
00:48:18.240
your husband feel appreciated during pregnancy? My husband has stepped up in so many ways and I just have
00:48:24.320
no energy, but I want him to know how much I love and appreciate him. Okay. Well, first of all,
00:48:30.000
say that you love and appreciate him. Don't underestimate the value and actually saying,
00:48:34.320
expressing the gratitude. Thank you, honey, for everything you do for me and the baby,
00:48:38.960
all the errands you're running, the cooking you're doing, just say the words, you know,
00:48:42.960
obviously communicate, have the conversation. He doesn't expect you to, you know, run around
00:48:49.040
looking for a present for him or to go to the gym because that's something that you used to do
00:48:53.040
together. Like be realistic, make time for each other. And remember like me, when you are pregnant,
00:48:59.280
it is a very hard time for your spouse because he knows that you're bonding with that baby.
00:49:02.960
And that's something that he's not having. So, you know, plan something special for him,
00:49:07.040
make his favorite meal, give him a massage or a movie night. I would, I have four kids,
00:49:11.680
you know, yes, you feel like crap by the time you're in your 37th week, but you have 37 weeks that you're,
00:49:18.320
or let's say 20 of them that you're feeling pretty good. As a matter of fact,
00:49:21.600
some of the women feel great. They feel sexier than ever. So, and also like the small things,
00:49:27.040
like involve, if your husband's the pet, my husband's not the type of guy, like he doesn't
00:49:30.320
want to go see the sonograms. He doesn't want to go to the doctor's office. Like, just let me know
00:49:33.920
when the baby's coming. But like, if your husband's that kind of guy, you know, have him, have him come
00:49:38.960
to the doctor's appointments with you, talk about the baby names, decorate the nursery, do a little
00:49:43.360
shopping. And yeah, ultimately like a little text message, like guys are so easy to please in that way,
00:49:49.360
a little text message from a wife. I love you, honey. I feel like a whale, but you make me feel
00:49:54.080
like a queen. Like that, you know, just be real, be nice. I love it. That's exactly right. I agree
00:50:01.120
with everything you said. I think just being, showing your love, showing that you respect him,
00:50:05.360
showing that you appreciate him, just telling him that is really important. And then just,
00:50:11.280
as you kind of mentioned, easy, spent quality time. So like, you want to, you're feeling tired,
00:50:17.200
you're feeling exhausted, honey, I'm going to order in pizza tonight, and I want to watch a movie with
00:50:21.040
you. And I don't want to do anything else, but spend time with you. Or like, we're going to play
00:50:25.520
a couple of board games, and we're going to keep it simple. But I don't have to do a lot because maybe
00:50:30.080
I'm too tired to make dinner tonight. But at least we're going to be spending time together. And I want
00:50:33.600
you to know I'm putting you first for that for the next two or three hours, whatever it is,
00:50:37.840
you can absolutely like devote. I think I've talked about this before, but I won't get into
00:50:44.000
it too much. But quality time really is important. And it's not like it's a unique thing that is only
00:50:49.440
one of the five loving love languages. My feeling is quality time is the love language that all of
00:50:54.480
the other love languages are built on. So using quality time is like the best way to show that
00:51:00.800
you appreciate your husband. So just saying, whatever it is, keep it simple. But I'm just going to be
00:51:05.840
focused on you for now because I want you to know that I love you and I'm so grateful for you.
00:51:11.040
I think that's plenty and he'll really appreciate it. Yeah, so well said.
00:51:15.760
So I think that is it for today's episode of the Classically Abbey podcast. Thank you
00:51:20.480
so much for coming on. Tell us where we can find you.
00:51:24.240
I'm a fan of music. You can do a quick Google that's CH like Hanukkah,
00:51:28.480
the weekly squeeze podcast Thursdays. I'm on Instagram. And yeah, I mean,
00:51:33.920
my podcast is a little different than yours. I don't speak specifically
00:51:37.120
as on feminism, the way you do on classical feminism, the way you do. It's more comedy,
00:51:43.200
politics and religion. But I do I have connected to you. So I do know that people like you,
00:51:48.320
they were like me and vice versa. My audience loved you. And it's always nice to make a connection
00:51:52.560
with women around the world. And I am grateful that you gave this opportunity.
00:51:56.480
I love having my followers, first of all, get to know more Orthodox Jewish creators. I think that's
00:52:01.760
so important for people to see us in this public space because not many people know Orthodox Jews
00:52:07.520
in person. So for them to see us, know us, know that we're normal, know that we have a lot of
00:52:12.640
really interesting points of view, I think is great. And on top of that, more women's,
00:52:18.080
not that I'm only for women or you're only for women as far as your podcast, but more women's
00:52:22.800
spaces are just great to be a part of. You get to be part of a community that you really enjoy.
00:52:27.200
And there's a different perspective in hearing from a woman as opposed to somebody else. So
00:52:30.960
I am really glad that I got to introduce you to my subscribers.
00:52:35.840
Thank you. Thank you for having me. Yeah. So thank you so much for coming on.
00:52:39.600
If you would like to subscribe, make sure to follow me on YouTube, on Instagram, on Twitter,
00:52:44.320
and you can follow this podcast wherever you listen to podcasts.
00:52:47.760
Thank you so much for listening and I'll see you guys in my next episode. Bye.