For The Women Who Aren't Married And Don't Have Children： This Is For YOU.
Episode Stats
Words per Minute
164.15608
Summary
In this episode, I talk about how you can still be classic, still be worthy, and still have value even if you don't have children yet. I also talk about why it's okay to be single, and why you are worthy.
Transcript
00:00:00.160
Hello Classic Crew and welcome to today's video where I want to share my thoughts
00:00:04.400
on being single, those of you who aren't yet mothers, who aren't yet married,
00:00:18.480
If you are new to my channel, here we talk about classic living and traditional values
00:00:22.240
and I would love if you would consider subscribing and hitting that notification bell. If you'd like
00:00:26.080
access to a ton of exclusive content including my book club, my exclusive weekly articles,
00:00:31.360
my movie club, all of that kind of stuff, make sure to head over to classicallyabby.substack.com.
00:00:36.640
Now I have a playlist on my channel that I've called sharing my thoughts and in this series of
00:00:42.160
videos I kind of just talk about the things I've been thinking about lately and it's not to change
00:00:47.680
anyone's mind, it's not here to convince you of anything, it's more to just start a conversation
00:00:53.920
and see where other people are at. So today I really want to talk to those of you who aren't
00:00:59.120
married yet, who don't have children yet, who are still single, maybe you're past the point in your
00:01:04.720
life where you would get married and have children and you are just single and that is your life and
00:01:10.880
I really want to talk to you guys just about how you can still be classic, you can still be worthy,
00:01:17.680
you can still have value. These are all true statements and just how that fits into the classic
00:01:24.880
traditional perspective. So let's just get right into it. So in a lot of my videos I talk about
00:01:32.400
the importance of having children, the importance of getting married, the importance of doing these
00:01:39.520
traditional steps in life and a lot of my content is geared toward those women who don't know that
00:01:47.440
that's important, who think that being empowered is being independent, who think that an abortion
00:01:53.200
is better than having a child, who think that being in a long-term relationship that has no future and
00:01:58.640
won't end in marriage or children is more empowering than getting married, having a stable life, raising a
00:02:06.720
family, being part of community, that kind of a thing. So a lot of my content is geared towards those
00:02:11.600
women who don't know that yet but there are so many of you wonderful people in the comments who
00:02:19.600
believe and agree with what I'm saying but just it hasn't either worked out quite yet, you're still
00:02:26.720
waiting, you're in a period of life before your marriage and before you've had children and you just
00:02:34.000
don't have these things yet. And my worry is that because I make this content which is geared toward
00:02:41.680
convincing those women who yet don't know that this is so important, it could make somebody who is
00:02:51.280
not in that stage of life feel like they don't have value or their life at this point isn't worthy.
00:02:58.960
And what I really want to clarify is that if you know that these things are important, if you agree
00:03:06.160
that a traditional stable marriage and life and family is the building block of society and
00:03:12.960
civilization, if you know that these are important things and you're just not there yet, you just
00:03:18.000
haven't met the right guy, you may be struggling with infertility, whatever it is, you have value,
00:03:25.280
you are worthy. If you have the right intentions and you're just not there yet or your path has gone
00:03:31.920
in a different direction but you know the importance of these things then that's what matters, that's the
00:03:40.320
important thing. I am encouraging women away from making bad decisions that'll hurt them but there's a
00:03:47.760
difference between making bad choices and being led in a different direction by God. So I should
00:03:54.320
differentiate a little bit between the two different groups I'm addressing in this video. So there's
00:03:59.120
the women who are young and single and who haven't yet found the right guy but would like to and would
00:04:06.960
like to have a family. Okay that's one group. The second group is those women who maybe are past the point
00:04:14.800
of childbearing years, have never gotten married, would have wanted to but that just didn't end up happening
00:04:20.720
for them and now they're living a different life. Both of those kinds of women have an incredibly
00:04:27.520
beautiful life and I think that it's really important to understand that it's not you making a
00:04:34.720
choice away from these values we hold so dear. It's just not the right timing or it's being led in a
00:04:42.880
different direction and that is a beautiful thing. So for those of you who are still single, are still
00:04:49.200
waiting on meeting the right guy, who haven't had children yet, the thing to keep in mind there is
00:04:55.040
that it's so important to enjoy every juncture in your life. Being grateful to God and enjoying this
00:05:02.960
part of your life where you are single, where you can take time to develop your interests, develop yourself,
00:05:08.400
make yourself a wonderful person, volunteer, date and meet people so that you can find the right guy.
00:05:16.240
That's a great part of your life. Those years are invaluable and really beautiful and important.
00:05:22.560
And on the other side for those women who are a little bit past that point, maybe just never met
00:05:27.040
the right guy but still have an open heart, I think that's what's so important. Keeping an open heart
00:05:32.000
and an open mind but not hating where you are, enjoying where you are, loving where you are. It's sort of like
00:05:40.480
body positivity. The bad version of body positivity is I don't want to hate my body because my body is
00:05:50.080
a beautiful thing and it does so much for me but in doing that I'm not going to work hard to better
00:05:58.240
my body. So even if I'm obese, I'm not going to lose weight because I love my body. Or even if I'm
00:06:04.080
anorexic, I'm not going to work on that condition and make myself a healthy weight. The good version
00:06:10.480
of body positivity is I love my body because of what it does for me and because of that,
00:06:15.760
I want to work hard to make it healthy. Now does that mean I have to hate where my body is right
00:06:21.280
now? No. Do I have to hate the way it looks? Absolutely not. It's just I constantly want to
00:06:26.320
improve it and make it better so that I'm healthy. The same is true with dating and marriage and
00:06:34.400
children. If you hate where you're at, then you're not being grateful to God for the life that you're
00:06:40.960
living. But you can't love where you're at so much, love that you eschew what those traditional
00:06:50.400
values could lead you to. So even if you think you're past the point of getting married or past
00:06:55.040
the point of maybe not having your own children but fostering or being involved in your niece's
00:07:01.200
and nephew's lives or the children in your community's lives, even if you think you're past
00:07:06.400
that point, keeping an open heart and open mind without saying I hate where I'm at just by saying
00:07:12.240
I love where I'm at, but if God gives me an opportunity for something different, I'm open to
00:07:17.040
that. That is a beautifully positive thing. I think what I really want to say is that you are as beautiful,
00:07:25.680
valuable, worthy, married with children as you are when you're single and you don't have children yet.
00:07:33.680
Because really, the thing about it is if you accept the main tenets of these traditional values as
00:07:43.680
truth, and if you do, and you just haven't reached that point yet, that's totally fine. There's a reason
00:07:51.680
you are where God put you. I mean, trusting God is really the way I have been able to navigate so many
00:07:57.840
hard times in my life and also been able to navigate those times where I wanted something
00:08:03.440
but God wanted something different for me. And I think that's really what it comes down to. So if you
00:08:08.880
can enjoy where you are, love where you are, while also trusting God's vision and path for you, then
00:08:17.600
you're doing it all right. Like, just love where you're at. Enjoy it. Keep an open heart, but enjoy what
00:08:24.160
you're doing. That's what I think is the most important thing. So I want you to know, if you
00:08:30.880
ever see a video that I post or write an article that I write that says how important motherhood,
00:08:37.920
marriage, traditional lives are, but you haven't been able to accomplish it or you're not there yet,
00:08:45.200
it's not to undermine where you are. It's to teach those women who don't yet know the importance of
00:08:51.840
these things, not to purposefully move in the wrong direction. So I hope you guys enjoyed today's video.
00:08:59.840
I'd really like to know your comments down below. I just, I have to say, I loved my single life. I
00:09:06.000
really did. I thought that there was so much fun that you can do. Now being a mom and being married,
00:09:11.120
the timing of your day is so much led by your child and your husband, and you just don't have
00:09:19.120
as much freedom as you did. And that's okay. It's a beautiful thing, but it is
00:09:24.320
different than what you had when you were 21 or 22. And so enjoying those years where you can do
00:09:30.560
whatever you want on your schedule is really important. Like that's a wonderful time in your
00:09:36.240
life. So cool. And if you are older and you are, you know, not getting married and not having children,
00:09:44.000
but you have developed a really beautiful relationship with God, with your community,
00:09:48.160
with your family, that's awesome. Maybe you are doing something with your work. That's really
00:09:54.960
important. And that's really bringing joy and happiness and goodness into the world. That's amazing.
00:10:01.200
I don't think that you should issue family for work in order to, in order to give that joy to people
00:10:10.640
outside of your home. But if that didn't end up working out for you, where you have children, where
00:10:16.400
you are raising a family, why not share those gifts with people outside of the home? Absolutely. That is
00:10:23.840
what God wanted you to do. Clearly. I hope you guys enjoyed today's video. Let me know your thoughts
00:10:29.200
in the comments. If you aren't already subscribed to my channel, make sure to hit that notification bell
00:10:34.400
and head over to my Substack newsletter, where you can get access to a ton of exclusive content.
00:10:39.120
Make sure to follow me on all social media. It's at classicallyabbie absolutely everywhere.
00:10:42.480
Thank you guys so much for watching and I'll see you guys in my next video. Bye.