Classically Abby - April 17, 2024


Modesty MATTERS And Here's Why.


Episode Stats


Length

10 minutes

Words per minute

178.6912

Word count

1,794

Sentence count

113

Harmful content

Misogyny

14

sentences flagged

Toxicity

2

sentences flagged

Hate speech

13

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode, Abby talks about the concept of modesty and how it can be used to your advantage. She explains why modesty is a virtue to be harnessed and how to use it in a way that gets women what they want.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 We've lost the thread on modesty.
00:00:06.680 If you are new to my channel, my name is Abby and here we talk about common sense commentary
00:00:11.260 where I talk about things that I think are kind of obvious but in today's day and age would be
00:00:16.140 considered pretty controversial. So let's just get into today's video. If you have been on my
00:00:21.440 channel before, you will know that some of my most popular videos are about modesty. I talk
00:00:26.600 about modesty a lot here on my channel because I love modesty. I think that it is a beautiful
00:00:31.260 concept. It's one that really embraces your femininity. I think that it can really show
00:00:36.920 respect to who you are and to your body. But modesty is very controversial these days and
00:00:42.620 people take a lot of offense to the term, to the idea. They think it's controlling. They
00:00:47.480 think it's patriarchal and I am here to say it is none of those things. I am here to be
00:00:52.040 a big proponent of modesty because I think it's really important and I want to share
00:00:56.840 why. I don't think that modesty is only for the religious. I don't think that modesty is
00:01:01.380 only for the prudish. I think that modesty is something that everyone should embrace because
00:01:05.640 I think that it can only benefit you, the woman. And I know, again, unpopular opinion that it's 0.95
00:01:12.700 about you as the woman and not about men. But it is for you and I'm going to tell you why.
00:01:18.240 People often think that when I'm talking about modesty, I'm talking about it as a weapon to be
00:01:23.180 wielded rather than as a tool to be used. A weapon to be wielded is you are dressed immodestly. You
00:01:31.000 look inappropriate and you are gross, basically. You are just inappropriate. I don't want you in my 1.00
00:01:37.260 space. You are upsetting to be around. I think that in today's day and age, it's very hard to dress
00:01:43.800 modestly. I mean, bras are basically clothing now. Like you can just wear a bra out and about and that
00:01:50.200 is considered fashion. Or you can see women on the red carpet and they're literally wearing 1.00
00:01:54.620 nothing with like something sheer over their body. Like that is it. That is their dress. So it's very
00:02:00.960 difficult to dress modestly because that's not what we're being shown is fashionable. But the reason I
00:02:06.160 say it's a tool to be used is because modesty will get women what they want. It will get you what you 1.00
00:02:13.260 want. If you dress immodestly, you are asking men to look at you for your body and to ignore your
00:02:21.000 personality. They don't need to get to know you as the person. They are looking at you as a sex
00:02:26.220 object. Now, I don't think most women are wanting men to ignore who they are in favor of looking at them
00:02:33.500 as something they can sleep with, right? If you want more than a one night stand and you want
00:02:39.780 somebody to actually like you, then dressing to be attractive rather than to be objectified is,
00:02:47.640 you know, it's very different. We've made modesty the villain of our discourse rather than a virtue.
00:02:53.080 Are there some restrictions on the way that we should dress so that we can attract better attention?
00:02:58.500 Absolutely. But that's not a bad thing. And that doesn't mean that men are bad. It doesn't mean
00:03:05.060 that you are being restrained and now you should be, you should have freedom. It's a virtue to be
00:03:11.740 harnessed. You can use modesty to your advantage. You can dress in a way that accentuates your figure
00:03:17.460 without showing the entire thing off. You can dress in a way that makes you look beautiful rather than
00:03:24.280 sexy. And of course, there are times when those two things overlap. But I think there's this obsession
00:03:29.700 with wanting men to look at you. Women want to be desired. That makes sense. But realistically, 0.96
00:03:37.980 there is a very fine line between being desired within the range of being beautiful and also being
00:03:45.140 attractive and being desired within the range of being a sex object and men really not caring who you
00:03:51.300 are but really just wanting you for your body. And I think that modesty allows us to walk that line
00:03:56.560 and fall on this side rather than this side. Modesty doesn't need to be frumpy. It doesn't need to be
00:04:03.180 ugly. It should be beautiful. And it should accentuate your beauty. But it should be about how
00:04:09.140 lovely you are, not about how good you are in bed. A really good example of this is Sydney Sweeney.
00:04:15.860 There was this whole thing going around online about Sydney Sweeney because she has flaunted her 1.00
00:04:21.420 chest very publicly in the way that she dresses. And so there was this whole conversation about how
00:04:26.820 she was embracing her femininity and allowing the male gaze and how that was a good thing. 0.93
00:04:32.460 Okay, so let's clarify. Embracing your femininity is not the same thing as being overtly sexual.
00:04:39.400 Embracing your femininity is not about being a sex object. Embracing your femininity is about the
00:04:44.740 things that make women feminine. Nurturing, beauty, not sex, not just being a body. That is not 0.65
00:04:52.560 embracing femininity at all. In fact, that's very masculine to like put out all of this energy of
00:04:58.040 like, yeah, I am ready and here, take me to bed. That's very masculine rather than like the more
00:05:04.600 seductive, subtle version of I am beautiful. And you'll have to earn me that, which I know is
00:05:11.600 unpopular, but that is a much more feminine expression of sexuality is I am not just free.
00:05:21.820 You need to earn my attention. That's why I believe waiting for sex until marriage is so important. 0.83
00:05:26.460 You have to earn this thing that is so precious to me. My sex life is not just for everyone to have,
00:05:32.040 you know, a chance at. I am saving that for the one person who I believe earned it and who is going
00:05:38.760 to take care of it. And it's as precious to them as it is to me. Modesty has all of these ideas wrapped
00:05:44.360 up in it. At the end of the day, when you have a lot of women dressing immodestly, it actually makes 1.00
00:05:49.620 it harder for the women who do want to dress modestly. It's not just a choice of like, oh, 0.80
00:05:54.400 I guess you can dress this way or I guess you can dress that way. And it's just a preference.
00:05:58.380 It's not just a preference because women who dress immodestly make the market harder 1.00
00:06:02.940 for women who want to dress modestly. Who is going to get the initial attention more? The woman who 1.00
00:06:09.920 is dressed really provocatively or the woman who is dressed a little bit more modestly? It's going 1.00
00:06:15.700 to be the provocative one, but that's going to be short lived. The guys are going to go through 25
00:06:20.880 women. They're just dating, dating, dating, dating, but not really seeing a future with before they see 0.95
00:06:26.500 the girl who is going to be a little bit more work for them to end up with, right? They're actually going
00:06:32.340 to have to put in the effort. And a lot of men are not willing to put in that effort. The good men
00:06:36.340 are, but not all men. I think that modesty deals with the reality that men are attracted to women
00:06:42.320 through a visual means initially, but it doesn't so distract them that then they are completely removed
00:06:49.260 from who you are beyond what you look like. And if your boobs are out the entire conversation, it's going 0.63
00:06:55.660 to be difficult to want to know about like what your favorite movie is. The last thing to kind of talk 0.51
00:07:00.880 about is just how desensitized we've become to sexuality, to the female form, to nudity. If you are
00:07:10.020 consistently surrounded by naked people, then after a certain point, naked people aren't going to be
00:07:15.940 nearly as arousing as if you don't really see nudity and then all of a sudden you see your husband or your
00:07:23.680 wife in your bedroom naked. That is a lot more arousing than nudity everywhere. And unfortunately 1.00
00:07:30.440 today, we are really surrounded by nudity constantly. And we're telling people that you
00:07:35.300 shouldn't be aroused by the nudity that you're seeing on a regular basis because that would be
00:07:40.340 awkward, right? Like if the woman at the Oscars after party is wearing something that's completely
00:07:45.460 sheer and you're having a conversation with her, I don't think you're supposed to be aroused in that
00:07:49.840 situation. And so you're creating a system in which nudity and nakedness and immodesty are removed
00:07:58.580 from sexuality, which nobody wants, right? When you get undressed in front of your husband, you don't 0.92
00:08:04.200 want him to be like, oh, okay, another day. That doesn't feel very good. So modesty also makes sex
00:08:12.620 special because it makes nakedness special. I've always said that it is sexier to see a woman wear 1.00
00:08:20.740 a skirt that's longer, but if she sits down, it rides up a little bit because, oh, that's maybe not 1.00
00:08:27.100 something I'm supposed to see than a woman who wears a mini skirt. Like if she's already completely 1.00
00:08:33.120 exposed, then it doesn't matter. But if the slit in her dress opens a little bit and you see her leg a 0.99
00:08:39.200 little more, that's always going to be a little sexier because, oh, like, am I supposed to see
00:08:43.560 that? And that's why modesty is so beautiful because it makes things hidden that then in private
00:08:50.480 are even more sexy because you're alone and they're not supposed to be seen in public.
00:08:56.820 There is a real beauty to modesty. It respects your body. It respects the things that, that make you,
00:09:04.680 you, but are not the focus of who you are. Your body is not the focus of who you are.
00:09:09.800 Your body is a part of who you are. And if you make it the entirety, they're not going to take
00:09:14.240 another minute to figure out what the person is behind, behind the body alone. So I am a huge
00:09:20.860 proponent of modesty. I would love to hear your thoughts below. What do you think? Do you think
00:09:25.260 we've lost the thread on modesty? And last but not least, if you've watched till the end of today's
00:09:30.380 video, leave a heart in your favorite color down below. I would love to see it. My favorite color
00:09:36.980 is blue. It's a light blue though. I think that's correct. Like my shirt, I would say this is like
00:09:42.240 pretty close to my favorite color. And I will see you guys in my next one. Bye!
00:10:00.380 Bye!