Classically Abby - Prince Harry's ＂SPARE＂ Is A DISASTER ⧸⧸ Ep. 4 ＊book review＊

00:00:00.000 I read Spare and I have so many thoughts why the Israelites needed to put blood on their 1.00

00:00:05.940 doorposts in Egypt. And do I believe that IVF is wrong? All this and more on today's episode of

00:00:12.620 the Classically Abbey podcast.

00:00:30.000 Hello and welcome to today's episode of the Classically Abbey podcast. I'm so glad you are

00:00:36.640 here. If you are new to the podcast, make sure to subscribe so that you can see all of our new

00:00:42.080 episodes, all of my new episodes. And if you would prefer to watch the podcast rather than listen to

00:00:49.540 it, then you can head over to my YouTube and subscribe there as well. I hope you guys are

00:00:55.180 doing great. And in today's episode, our main portion is going to be about Prince Harry's

00:01:01.900 Spare, the book that he just came out with. I'm a little bit late to the game on this,

00:01:07.420 just a little bit, because I wanted to make sure I actually had read the whole thing before giving

00:01:11.900 my review. I kind of gave a mini review and I had listened to just the first bit, a little bit of

00:01:18.440 the first portion. And now I can actually talk about it. And I want to explain why I feel that

00:01:26.440 it's important to talk about in the first place, why this isn't just gossip, but why I think it's

00:01:30.720 relevant to what we talk about here at Classically Abbey. So we'll also be doing our weekly catch-up,

00:01:37.240 our faith talk, and stay tuned till the end where I'll be answering my premium subscriber questions.

00:01:43.280 Now, if you want to submit questions for future episodes, make sure to become a premium subscriber

00:01:48.280 on my Substack. It's at classicallyabbey.substack.com. It's just $7 a month and you'll get access to my

00:01:55.020 book club, as well as exclusive weekly articles and a bunch of other great things. We have an

00:02:00.100 amazing community over there and it's only $7 a month. Or if you pay for the whole year,

00:02:05.540 you'll get two months for free. So if you like the podcast, make sure to share it with your friends,

00:02:11.640 with your family. And I would love if you would leave a review on Apple Podcasts. It's always good

00:02:16.880 for my podcast if you do so. But now let's get into our weekly catch-up. So I have a few things

00:02:25.260 to share. It's been a busy couple of weeks, starting with the fact that my son caught hand,

00:02:31.400 foot, and mouth. So I don't know if you have kids. I'm sure you know what hand, foot, and mouth is.

00:02:36.040 If you don't, it's like sores that show up on the hands, the feet, and in the mouth. My son has now

00:02:42.140 had it twice, which is crazy because he's not even in daycare. He's just at home with me. But

00:02:46.900 it's probably because we go to synagogue. So he's still spending time with other kiddos. And he has

00:02:54.100 had it twice. It is no fun. The first time he had it was at six months and he ran 104 fever,

00:03:01.240 which was really scary. He actually went to the emergency room that time. And this time,

00:03:05.580 I think maybe because he's a little older, he only ran 102.5. And then again, he woke up in the

00:03:10.140 middle of the night. He had spiked his fever again. But he's doing pretty well. He's recovering

00:03:15.740 well. But basically what that meant is that my week has been taking care of my son and not doing

00:03:24.260 a lot of work and trying to cram work into the pockets of time in which he's sleeping or whatever

00:03:30.580 else. Someone else is watching him or something. But it's always crazy. And I'm sure moms can relate

00:03:35.400 that when your kid is not feeling well or is sick, then you are twice as busy because you are trying

00:03:44.900 to figure out how to get things done that you need to get done while also being a lot more engaged with

00:03:52.340 your children because you have to take care of them a lot in a much more intense way. So that's been

00:03:57.460 that's been hard, but he's doing a lot better. And that's the important thing. We're actually going

00:04:03.180 to get his first haircut today. I know I can't believe it. He's almost a year old. And we're

00:04:10.300 going to talk about that in a future episode. But I'm planning his birthday party. And I'm really

00:04:14.620 excited about it. But he's getting his first haircut today. And it's really interesting because Mr.

00:04:20.900 Baby Nubber actually lost his hair. He was born with like a full head of hair. And he never lost it.

00:04:25.320 He's always had a very nice head of hair. And so now the end is starting to get really long

00:04:31.040 and curling out. And it's time for his first haircut. And we're we're both excited to see

00:04:37.120 what he's going to look like because it really does make a baby look like a little boy. So

00:04:41.200 that's amazing. But also it's just like he's getting big so fast. How is this happening? I

00:04:46.760 don't I don't even know. We've been going to the library. So I don't know if you guys have

00:04:52.440 been to your local library, but you should go going to the library is the best number one

00:04:58.240 free entertainment. It's awesome. Number two, reading is great. I'm a big proponent

00:05:03.040 of reading. Number three, it's a new environment for Mr. Baby to explore. And it's a place for us

00:05:09.500 to go just even a couple times a week for him to just crawl around and enjoy a new space. I put him

00:05:17.620 down in the little kids room while we look for books to bring home. And he has such a good time.

00:05:23.460 I am such a big fan of the library. I didn't go for a long time, but I'm trying to remember when

00:05:29.740 I started going in Omaha when we lived in Omaha for a year. That was, I think, the first place I

00:05:34.660 had gotten my library card since childhood. And I loved going to the library when I started going

00:05:44.040 even more in Virginia and now here. So if you have a local library, even if you don't have kids yet,

00:05:50.860 check it out because free books, awesome. Also free magazines and free movies. Why not? But if you

00:05:58.460 have kids, it's even more fun. Like you have a place to spend time with your kids that's free,

00:06:03.880 that they enjoy. And a lot of the time they have like readings and things like that. And now that

00:06:08.520 we just shifted over my son's nap schedule, we should be able to go to some of the readings for

00:06:16.080 little babies that they do because originally it was during his nap, but we are shifting around his

00:06:21.560 nap schedule right now, which is stressful, but exciting. I shouldn't, I'm like getting derailed.

00:06:28.160 I have a whole list of things to talk about in our weekly catch up, but I have so many things

00:06:32.260 I want to, I keep like bringing up that I want to mention. I don't know why I feel like I haven't

00:06:38.420 talked to you guys in a while, which is ridiculous because I talk to you every week, but still,

00:06:42.180 I feel like I haven't talked to you guys in a while. So hi, I missed you. Um, but it's really

00:06:47.080 funny because Mr. Baby the other night, so while he was dealing with hand, foot and mouth,

00:06:52.780 generally my policy is if he is sick, I don't wake him up from naps. I just let him sleep as much as

00:06:59.620 he needs so he can recover. Well, that was a mistake because on Friday, uh, he took a nap and he fell

00:07:08.660 asleep around four and I let him sleep till six, but his bedtime is usually seven 30 to eight.

00:07:15.240 Well, he did not go to sleep until 10 and then he woke up at 12 45 and was ready to party.

00:07:22.400 So the two of us hung out while he played with his toys between 12 45 and 3 AM. And then he slept from

00:07:29.680 three till eight o'clock. So basically he treated his first part of the night between 10 and 12 45

00:07:37.840 as like a nap. And then he woke up and was awake. Uh, it was not the best. And that was when I talked

00:07:45.100 to my dad and he is a big fan of talking about baby sleep. And he said, you know, let's just do one

00:07:51.140 nap today, even though he normally does two and then we'll see how he sleeps. And last night he slept

00:07:57.780 from seven 30 PM till six 40 AM just straight through no wake ups. It was awesome. So now I'm

00:08:07.580 kind of going off my dad's new recommendation for his nap schedule, which is a half hour in the morning,

00:08:12.140 just to get him through to his real nap in the day between 12, uh, between when is his second nap

00:08:19.880 between like 12 30 and two, uh, sorry, 12 30 and three. This is a lot of detail if you're not

00:08:26.520 interested in baby naps, but it's kind of interesting to me. So I'm sharing it. Feel free

00:08:31.880 to skip it. If you are not interested, fair enough, but we've been spending a lot of time with my

00:08:37.800 parents and Jacob's parents, and it's just been so lovely. And one of the things that we've recognized

00:08:43.320 because we spent a weekend with Jacob's parents, and then we actually spent this past weekend with my

00:08:46.940 parents is just how much we actually enjoy having our parents around. I think a lot of people feel

00:08:53.320 that stress or they have anxiety between kind of attention between in-laws and depending on the

00:09:01.280 relationship, I don't think it has to be that way. We're very, very blessed that that is not our

00:09:06.300 situation at all. And we really enjoy being with the other's parents. And it's something that I think

00:09:13.260 more people should try to develop if that is possible. Cause I know that some in-law relationships

00:09:19.960 are really fraught with tension, but if it's just kind of like meh, maybe develop it, maybe see if

00:09:27.620 there's a way for you to develop that relationship with each other's sets of parents so that you can

00:09:31.780 enjoy the time that you spend with them as much as we enjoy the time we spend with our, with our

00:09:37.940 parents. The, uh, the next thing I want to mention is something about what Jacob said about our house,

00:09:45.140 which made me so happy. Uh, so we live in an 1800 square foot home, which is not tiny at all,

00:09:54.100 like not at all, but it isn't huge. Uh, it's three bedrooms and the middle portion of the house is

00:09:59.000 one big open space. And I love our house. I really, really do. But when Jacob said,

00:10:06.220 our house is like a cottage, it made me go from liking our house and really enjoying it to being

00:10:13.560 like, Oh my gosh, this is bliss. I am obsessed with our house. Now I love the idea of living in a

00:10:22.480 cottage. A cottage is cozy. A cottage is warm. A cottage is, is more petite, but there's something

00:10:30.040 beautiful about how small and cozy and warm it is, right? You can't have a ginormous house that is

00:10:37.220 a cottage because part of something being a cottage is that it is more contained. And so loving, I loved

00:10:45.500 when he said that because a, I'm hoping he said it because of the way I've decorated it and I've made it

00:10:50.900 feel warm and welcoming and cozy. But I also feel like when you, it just really taught me how much

00:10:58.120 a shift in perspective can make you enjoy something more. So just shifting my perspective from, Oh, this

00:11:04.660 is a, a smaller home, not one that I think is small, but could be a smaller home to some people.

00:11:12.800 Instead of thinking that thinking of it as a cottage that is warm and inviting that makes it so

00:11:19.480 lovely. And so if you live in a smaller home, a smaller space, try thinking about it. Like it's

00:11:25.320 a cottage. I think it'll change the way you view it and it'll make you enjoy the space even more.

00:11:32.060 Last but not least, sort of last but not least. We'll do, this is a second to last but not least.

00:11:38.120 Can you believe it's already February? How is the year going by so quickly? 2023 feels like it's

00:11:44.700 flying. January went by so fast and we're going to be in February so soon. We can talk about

00:11:50.620 Valentine's day. Leave your thoughts in the comments on, on YouTube. If you have thoughts

00:11:57.060 about Valentine's day, because I'm curious, but if you want to leave comments on just the podcast,

00:12:02.620 then you can become a premium subscriber at sub stack and on my sub stack. And that's how you will

00:12:07.120 be able to leave a comment on the podcast itself. But I just can't believe that we've already gotten

00:12:11.860 to February because January feel like it just, we just entered 2023. How did that happen?

00:12:18.020 Okay. Here's the real last thing for our weekly catch up, which is a fun new board game I wanted

00:12:22.940 to mention. So if you didn't know, my husband, Jacob is a board game aficionado. He loves board

00:12:29.140 games. He collects them. He, we play so many board games. I have so many reviews I'm sure I could share,

00:12:35.660 but I wanted to share a game that we played yesterday for the first time and it's called

00:12:40.860 Irish gauge. It's kind of like a mixture, uh, between ticket to ride. And what's the second,

00:12:50.640 what's the second game? Maybe something with stocks, let's say acquire, which most people don't

00:12:54.180 know. But if you do know the name of the game acquire, there's a very small element of stocks

00:12:59.540 that acquire is all about stocks. But in any case, this game is a lot of fun. It's really easy. It's

00:13:07.240 really quick. And it's one of the things that we talk a lot about a lot about is the aesthetic of a

00:13:14.600 game. If you buy a game, that's really fun, but it's just ugly to look at. It's not as fun to play.

00:13:20.140 And this is a really beautiful game. I love the Irish aesthetic. It's something I really enjoy

00:13:25.680 looking at. So playing this game was very enjoyable for me for that reason. It's easy to learn and it's

00:13:32.100 a lot of fun. So if you're looking for a new game to check out, I highly recommend Irish gauge. So now

00:13:37.860 let's get into the main portion of today's episode, which is Prince Harry's new memoir spare. Now I

00:13:45.580 listened to the book and it was a slog to listen to. It was, I think, 14 hours if you couldn't speed it

00:13:51.740 up and I sped it up to 1.15, 1.25. And that, that helped. But my husband and I were listening to it

00:14:01.020 in the car and we had to take turns driving because it kept putting us to sleep. So my husband drove

00:14:10.020 first and I fell asleep in the back and then he started to fall asleep. And then we switched because

00:14:14.420 I woke up, I took over to drive and then he fell asleep in the back. It was very, very funny.

00:14:20.600 Uh, and I think that shows you a little bit about, about how a he narrates, but also be the content

00:14:27.940 of this book. Of course it is, you know, gossip and people are excited because it's a look into

00:14:34.720 the Royal family that they've never seen before. But the truth is, is that it is, uh, not super

00:14:42.340 interesting to listen to, especially the first section. The first section is, is really, really long

00:14:48.180 and boring mostly. So here's the thing. The only reason I listened to this was because I wanted

00:14:55.700 to be able to share my thoughts on it with you all. I don't believe that sharing your thoughts

00:14:59.480 on something you haven't listened to, read, watched, whatever is fair to the thing you're

00:15:04.940 criticizing, discussing, you know, any of that. So I thought that this was important. And the reason

00:15:12.060 I thought it was important was because this is an example of how not to be classic. Everything we

00:15:18.640 talk about here at classically Abbey is traditional values, classic living and modern femininity. And 0.99

00:15:24.260 spare does not, it's a guidebook on how to not be classic. And that's relevant to us, right? We can

00:15:33.580 take lessons, not only from positive places, but from negative things. We can watch something and say,

00:15:38.820 that's how I don't want to act. That's what I don't want from my life. And this book is, I think,

00:15:43.780 a very good example of that. So let's talk about turning the world against your family. I mean,

00:15:51.040 Harry turned the world again, is trying to change the narrative, right? The narrative right now is

00:15:57.660 you left your family, you betrayed your family, you married this woman who took you away from your 0.99

00:16:02.340 duties. And he wants it to change to, well, I'm the victim. I ran away because my family is so

00:16:09.600 terrible. The people who love me, the people who are closest to me, I am going to throw under the

00:16:14.600 bus to change the narrative. Now, this is ironic given the fact that in the book, he criticizes his

00:16:21.420 own father multiple times and Camilla, his mother-in-law, rather his stepmother, for trying to put things in

00:16:31.240 the press to make them look better when he is doing literally the exact same thing, but even worse.

00:16:39.200 He shares secrets. He lies about wanting privacy when all he really wants is positive fame. There's

00:16:49.100 a very big difference between wanting privacy, wanting no one to talk about you at all, and wanting

00:16:54.280 people to talk about you, wanting to be famous, but wanting it on your own terms, wanting it to be

00:17:00.000 a positive fame because people love you. They have put themselves in the public eye so many times,

00:17:07.440 so often in the last however many years, that it can't be that they just want privacy. Because if

00:17:15.260 they just wanted privacy, they could sequester themselves, go somewhere very private, buy a very

00:17:21.680 large plot of land, and do their best to avoid being in the papers. Now, I will get to the paparazzi

00:17:31.020 because I know that the paparazzi is a very important part of this book, and I think should

00:17:36.680 have been the main portion, main thing about this book. And there was a missed opportunity here.

00:17:42.520 But if they didn't want to be in the news and they didn't want to have fame at all, they could

00:17:47.680 in some ways do that by just not being out there. But they have put themselves out there because they

00:17:53.140 want fame. They just want it to be positive. Complaining about your life and being the second

00:17:59.340 oldest when you had money and time and opportunities to travel and do good works, that's just not

00:18:05.420 classic. And that's what Prince Harry did. That's what Prince Harry is doing. The book is all about how

00:18:11.120 depressing his life is when he's a very privileged individual. And I'm not saying that a person who

00:18:19.080 comes from a place of privilege can't have bad things happen to them. But the truth is that

00:18:24.540 outside of, and I'm not saying this isn't important, right, but outside of his mother's death, which is

00:18:31.360 a huge tragedy, the things that happen in his life, it's really hard to pity him for everything else

00:18:38.500 because he'll be like, you know, somebody was a little mean to me. And then I went and jet set

00:18:43.160 with my friends to go do some crazy thing that literally no one else in the world could afford

00:18:47.240 to do, but he gets to do just because he has the time and the money, right? So that's like a really

00:18:52.220 hard thing to parse. The truth is, Harry wasn't classic to begin with. In the same breath, he'll complain

00:19:00.320 about his life and then talk about how he went to party with his friends. He had the opportunity to do

00:19:07.060 good and be paid to do good and live a lavish lifestyle. But because he wasn't next in line

00:19:13.060 to be king, he let everything fall apart. The reason the book is called Spare is because he says that

00:19:20.600 William was the heir and he was the spare. And not just that he was the spare, but that he was born to

00:19:26.660 like donate his organs to his brother. Come on. That is such a lie. And something to keep in mind

00:19:34.720 about this book is that this is not a reliable narrator. He is telling everything from his point

00:19:44.640 of view. So how much of it is true? We don't know. And at the same time that he's doing that,

00:19:50.500 he's constantly saying that he has a very bad memory. He can't remember things. He can't. He's very

00:19:55.580 bad at remembering his past and then sharing really specific details about a lot of different

00:20:04.120 memories. I mean, these aren't blurred for me when I look back on my past and I'm sure it's similar

00:20:08.760 for you. You'll remember kind of like a swath of what a little memory was, like of how you felt and

00:20:15.860 who was there. But you're not going to remember the color of the couch. You're not going to remember

00:20:20.960 how many doilies were on your grandmother's table. Like, and he does. He remembers that stuff.

00:20:29.820 So why would he say that he doesn't have a good memory? So that he's not accountable for

00:20:34.500 misremembering something in his favor. He will say things that you have to imagine or he's being,

00:20:43.880 he's saying to make himself look better. But if he didn't remember it right and he doesn't have a

00:20:49.720 good memory, then he can't really be accountable. He's constantly blaming others for his bad

00:20:57.260 behavior, but calling others malicious for their behavior. They don't get any excuses, but he is

00:21:02.860 full of excuses. The paparazzi wanted to call him naughty. So that was really about like, but he wasn't

00:21:11.060 naughty. And yet everything he describes that he did in his youth and teenage years was very naughty. I

00:21:16.600 mean the way he lost his virginity was very sad for him and inappropriate when you read it. He made a lot

00:21:24.160 of really poor choices, but always blamed somebody else for those choices. But if anybody else is mean

00:21:30.000 to him, if anybody else is, is cruel or says something that he doesn't agree with, then that's

00:21:37.060 because they are cruel and they are malicious, but he doesn't have the same understanding of himself.

00:21:41.500 He's upset that the paparazzi is printing negative things about him and for the times that they lied,

00:21:48.280 which fair enough. I mean, I wouldn't want lies printed about me in the, in the papers, but the

00:21:53.620 truth is he also did a lot of bad, stupid things. He did cocaine. He was basically a drug addict. I mean, 1.00

00:22:00.120 there's a lot of history there. He naked partied with his friends without his girlfriend there, but then

00:22:07.020 there was pictures taken and he's trying throughout the book, he's trying to like justify, oh, like it's

00:22:12.020 just a thing that people do. Not everyone does that. People don't just do that. Uh, and that's just the tip

00:22:19.600 of the iceberg for him. And he overshares. And that is something that is definitely not classic. He talks

00:22:27.540 about like, he talks about his genital region a lot in the book in many different iterations. He's,

00:22:36.880 he talks about how he wants, uh, had loose bowels from magnesium at a friend's wedding. He's, he shares

00:22:44.640 too much. Talks about the crushes that he had on like the women at his school when like the, the teachers,

00:22:52.280 the women at his school, it was just, it's very odd. It's just too much. Something we can learn from 1.00

00:22:57.420 that. Don't overshare. It's not worth it. The truth is nobody wants to hear it. Everybody thinks it's

00:23:02.660 kind of crazy. One of the things that he does in the book is he calls William and Charles Willie and

00:23:09.580 Pa, which are terms of endearment. And that really upset me because it's like, he's using terms of

00:23:18.180 endearment so that he can defend himself when people accuse him of selling out his family.

00:23:22.980 No, no, no. He's Willie to me. That's Pa. I can sell out my father by telling the world that he

00:23:29.440 carries around a teddy bear as a comfort, as a security blanket, a grown man that you are now

00:23:35.440 telling the world he does something that I'm sure he would be embarrassed about. But I called him Pa.

00:23:42.140 So it really must mean that I love him. Oh, he's my brother, Willie. I love him so much. He's,

00:23:47.380 he's somebody I really care about, but also I'm going to tell everyone in the world about how

00:23:52.080 mean and awful he is to me and was to me. At the same time, he characterizes William as always

00:23:59.860 calling him Harold, something incredibly formal sounding, because then it justifies him hating

00:24:05.680 his brother. Of course, it's a tragedy that his mother died when he was so young, and that's where

00:24:13.540 when the book starts. And he had to go through that in the public eye. I'm not denying that. That is

00:24:18.140 awful. But you can't justify all of your bad choices from that point forward. He's almost 40.

00:24:26.060 It's just, it's not, you can't do that because everybody goes through something, some people more

00:24:33.740 than others. But William is his brother and went through the exact same thing. And look at how he

00:24:39.400 hates. He's married to Kate. They do wonderful works. They're very, you know, publicly very good

00:24:45.860 people. The truth is, I feel bad for him in some ways, because to me, it's clear that he's just not

00:24:55.280 very smart. Meghan clearly took advantage of that because she wanted to be famous. But when she became

00:25:02.420 famous for all the wrong reasons, she got mad and decided to keep herself in the press constantly

00:25:08.420 trying to change the narrative to make her the good one. Now, it's not working for her, but that's

00:25:13.500 been her goal since day one. And I don't think she ever wanted to stay in the royal family. I think she

00:25:19.360 wanted to raise her level of notoriety and then use that to her advantage. But it's really awkward

00:25:28.280 because when you get to the third section and I'll break down the sections in a minute, you can tell

00:25:34.120 that she was standing over his shoulder telling him what to write. Like, honey, honey, did you get

00:25:39.800 to the part where, where they said that about me in the news? Did you tell them that they were wrong?

00:25:44.300 Did you tell them that I didn't say that, that I'm actually a really nice person? It's, it's very

00:25:50.680 obvious as the reader that, that she was like, hey, honey, come on, come on, make sure they know. Like,

00:25:59.240 it's not, it's really uncomfortable. Meghan is, is not a classic woman. And I've said this before. She 0.98

00:26:05.700 didn't support her husband in his duties. She chose to marry someone whose life came with caveats and

00:26:12.280 then tore him away from the life that he was born into, tore him away from his family and tore him away

00:26:18.680 from what he should be doing, what he should have been doing. She did not support him in the way that

00:26:24.220 a spouse should support their partner. She, she ran away. And I mean, it's very clear to me in the

00:26:35.240 section where she says that she's going to commit suicide. It's, I'm not downplaying the seriousness of

00:26:44.140 that statement because I think that there are people who suffer with feelings like that and

00:26:49.700 we need to take it very seriously. But when you read what she told Harry, it's, it's very manipulative,

00:26:56.760 to be honest. It's very manipulative because she's saying things like, if I were gone, first of all,

00:27:04.540 she was pregnant at the time, which unforgivable in many ways, homicide to your child. But she's like,

00:27:11.480 I should die because if I die, then the paparazzi would stop chasing you. To me, that's very obvious.

00:27:19.460 Not like that is something that is so far beyond irrational that I don't think that that is real.

00:27:25.840 Like that's not something she would have really felt because she knew that Harry suffered.

00:27:29.620 Harry talks about how much the paparazzi used to follow him anyways. So she knew that wasn't the case.

00:27:35.020 And then on top of that, she's talking about how, you know, her child would never have to suffer with that.

00:27:44.160 Yeah, because your child would be dead. So I take issue with that, with that section and with the idea that

00:27:54.080 they needed to leave the royal family. I mean, she basically gave Harry an ultimatum that she knew would work

00:27:58.940 because she knew that he takes seriously how much the paparazzi can destroy someone's life, a.k.a.

00:28:06.100 his mother. So when she says something like that, of course, Harry is going to respond and he's not

00:28:11.660 very smart. So he's going to respond even more so and be like, this is how things have to be.

00:28:17.140 We have to get out of here. The book now breaking down the book a little bit, the book is

00:28:24.060 written stream of consciousness. So there's not really like a through line. It's just memory,

00:28:29.760 memory, memory, memory. And each memory is like each chapter is two pages, two or three pages.

00:28:35.560 So there's no narrative, no through line, just little memories I'm supposed to care about.

00:28:41.400 And then here is something that I took issue with, which is that the point of the book,

00:28:46.400 in my opinion, should have been that the paparazzi are dangerous and need to be dealt with because

00:28:56.580 I that was the one part of the book that I was like, yeah, that sounds horrible is being chased

00:29:01.520 around constantly, never having any privacy, even within your own home. That sounds awful.

00:29:07.260 Now, what the press prints about you, whatever, stop reading the press. And Charles told Harry that

00:29:13.180 a number of times and he ignored it. But the paparazzi legitimately shooting you in your own

00:29:20.060 home, that's just awful. But instead of making that the point by focusing on constantly defending

00:29:27.920 himself and defending Megan, it's distracting from the point from what the point of the book

00:29:33.160 should have been, which is we need to deal with this problem. But that's not really what the point

00:29:38.780 of the book was. And that's not really what he was trying to do, because he's not trying to get

00:29:43.320 privacy. He's not trying to hide himself from the news. He just wants to be famous on his terms.

00:29:53.420 Megan made Harry woke. And it's very clear when you listen to the Oprah interview, he said,

00:29:59.440 I was trapped, but I didn't know I was trapped. And anytime anyone says I was I didn't know I was this,

00:30:05.780 it's very clear that they've been they're being reintroduced to their memories in a new framework.

00:30:14.240 So a lot of this book you can tell you can tell was a retelling that was done through his new woke

00:30:21.520 worldview, something that would have he would have glossed over in the past, some interaction he would

00:30:28.000 have had with his brother that as a child that didn't matter and that he probably would have glossed

00:30:33.940 over. Now it's part of his woke worldview of the royal family is horrible. They're trying to constrain

00:30:39.900 me. And there's no idea. There's no picture of duty. It's all just I've been trapped and I need to be

00:30:48.580 free. The duties that Harry had were amazing. They were ones to his his people to do charity work. And in

00:31:01.960 return, he would have gotten a lavish lifestyle and dealing with the paparazzi. Now the paparazzi

00:31:08.440 part? Awful. But the lifestyle otherwise has been dealt with before for many years by many people.

00:31:16.600 And William and Kate handle it fine. So for him to act as though this is just undoable, unreasonable,

00:31:26.300 is directly opposed to the fact that his brother and sister-in-law are doing it.

00:31:31.260 The only part of the book that I thought was interesting and honestly, I felt that it was sad

00:31:39.600 was that this middle section, the first section of the book is his childhood. The middle section is

00:31:44.680 his time in the military. And the third section is meeting Megan. And you can tell that the section

00:31:51.360 that he's most passionate about was the time that he was in the military. And in that section,

00:31:56.280 he's really not as influenced by other people. It's just him talking about his time. And I feel

00:32:02.780 sorry for him that he didn't stay in the military because I think if he had spent his life doing

00:32:08.980 military service, he would have been very happy. He seemed to really enjoy it and he seemed to really

00:32:14.640 find purpose in it. Now, I also think that doing royal family duties could have been really great,

00:32:21.520 but his time in the military spoke to him in a way that I found meaningful. So unfortunately,

00:32:30.980 he did quit the military or leave the military rather, and he did meet Megan. And now this is his life.

00:32:39.140 And that's really sad, is that he now has to spend his life fighting to be in the limelight in a way

00:32:47.560 that he prefers. That's exhausting. It's not classic. And I think we can take a lot away from what I'm

00:32:58.060 talking about here because these are not classic qualities. And these aren't people who are pursuing

00:33:05.020 a life of meaning, purpose, and fulfillment in a godly way. These are people who are pursuing the,

00:33:13.540 they're worshiping at the altar of fame without, without recognizing that that is a double-edged

00:33:20.840 sword in a sense, that they, they, they should recognize it. They live it, but they don't want 0.97

00:33:26.600 to recognize it. They're fighting the reality of it. They want it to be on their terms when fame is not

00:33:32.380 on your terms. There's going to be a lot of people that hate you and a lot of people that love you.

00:33:36.100 And you are going to constantly be living in that instead of living your life for God,

00:33:43.620 living your life for your family and finding meaning and purpose and fulfillment in that way.

00:33:51.540 So that is my review of spare. I hope you guys enjoyed all of my thoughts on it. I had many,

00:33:58.980 I had more, but that was all I could fit in today's episode. So now let's get into today's

00:34:04.680 faith talk. So if you haven't listened to the podcast before, quick explanation of what this

00:34:09.940 section is of my podcast. Every week we do a Torah portion and I talk about what is going on in this

00:34:18.400 week's Parsha. Parsha means Torah portion in Hebrew. And it's, it's, I love doing this section of the

00:34:25.360 podcast because I love talking about the Torah. I think it's so fascinating. I did realize that

00:34:30.340 because I record a week in advance, you all are hearing last week's Torah portion each week. So

00:34:38.300 I'll say this week's Torah portion, but truly you're, you're hearing last week's Torah portion.

00:34:42.320 But in any case, uh, in today's Torah portion, we're talking about bow, which means come as in come

00:34:51.140 to Pharaoh. So in this week's Parsha, God brings the last three plagues upon the Egyptians, locusts, 0.85

00:35:01.580 which eat all the crops, a darkness so thick and palpable, the Egyptians can't even move within it 1.00

00:35:08.120 and the death of all the firstborn in Egypt at midnight. Before God brings the last plague,

00:35:15.100 he tells Moses that after this, after this plague, Pharaoh will drive them out of the land of Egypt.

00:35:20.560 He'll shoo them out. He'll say, get out of here. He won't just let them go. He will legitimately tell

00:35:26.260 them to, you must leave. Before they leave, the Jews are told that they should ask the Egyptians for

00:35:32.880 their gold, silver, and anything of value. The Israelites are also told that they should bring

00:35:38.140 a Passover offering to God, a kid goat to be slaughtered. And it's a lamb or a kid goat to be

00:35:46.020 slaughtered. And the blood should be sprinkled on the doorposts of Israelite homes so that God should 1.00

00:35:51.280 pass over them when he comes to bring the plague of killing the Egyptian firstborns. 1.00

00:35:58.280 And the roasted meat of that, of that offering is to be eaten together with matzah that night 0.97

00:36:04.480 and bitter herbs. Are you getting, are you getting where we are? We're getting Passover. This is the

00:36:10.300 story of Passover. And these are the laws. And it's very interesting because in the Torah,

00:36:13.720 we're getting actual laws that we use during the Seder, uh, on Passover. When the death of the

00:36:21.760 firstborn occurs, Pharaoh can't resist any longer. And he tells the Israelites to get out of his land.

00:36:26.440 They leave so quickly that there is no time for their dough to rise and all they can bring is matzah. 0.98

00:36:32.140 There's also a few different commandments, mitzvot that are shared in this Torah portion.

00:36:37.760 Um, but I have a question. So my question this week is, why did the Jews need to put blood on 1.00

00:36:48.880 their doorposts? Wouldn't God know who the Israelites were? Why did they need to delineate

00:36:57.340 themselves as, as Israelites separate from the Egyptians? God knows who we are. He knows

00:37:03.520 I live here. And you know, Sarah lives next door. He knows where we all, who we all are,

00:37:09.920 where we all are. So why are we doing something to like clarify it to God? God knows. I always found

00:37:15.640 that funny, right? Is we're going to put blood on the doorpost. So I'll know to Passover. Come on,

00:37:21.820 God knows. Like, why did we have to do that? Why did we have to do that extra step?

00:37:25.500 So there's a good reason. God was asking the Israelites to show who believed and trusted in 0.83

00:37:35.540 him. And not only that, he was doing it so that they could show each other who believed and trusted

00:37:42.480 in him. So why is this true? So number one, the animals that the Jews were supposed, the Israelites 0.99

00:37:50.400 were supposed to kill and put the blood on their door. Those were actually gods to the Egyptians. 0.99

00:37:55.800 So that was frightening. We're going to kill your gods and we're going to put, take their blood and 1.00

00:38:03.000 put them on our doorposts so that God, our God, the God, the God, the God who's been bringing all 1.00

00:38:08.400 these plagues upon you will know to pass over us and not put, and not bring this plague of the death of

00:38:15.220 the firstborns on our children. Like, that's a little terrifying is we're going to take your God

00:38:22.220 and sacrifice it to the God. So that's number one. I mean, that's dangerous. The Egyptians are much more 1.00

00:38:30.220 powerful than the Israelites, right? That's why they could enslave them. So that's a scary thing to do. 0.96

00:38:36.280 But number two, this seems weird, right? You're not only killing an animal and you're taking its blood

00:38:44.800 and then putting it on your doorframe. It's a weird thing that God is asking them to do. And

00:38:50.340 you have to trust in God and do it, even though it seemed odd. Like, would you,

00:38:55.000 would you trust in God enough to do that? So God wanted to see that the Israelites, 0.61

00:39:03.160 the Israelites who did this were the ones who got to leave Egypt. They were the ones who trusted in

00:39:11.000 God and believed in God. They were the ones who, even though this was an odd thing to do and scary

00:39:16.960 thing to do, they did it. And it showed their faith. Now, why did God need to know that they're,

00:39:22.920 that they're, that they had faith in him? The truth is he didn't. They needed to know.

00:39:30.920 They needed to know themselves. They needed to prove to themselves that they had that faith in God.

00:39:38.300 And I always think that's an interesting thing because we always say things like God needed us

00:39:42.040 to prove or show our faith in him, but really God doesn't need to know anything. He wants us to do

00:39:49.360 it for our own sake. I want you to do this thing because it is scary. And if you do it, you'll know

00:39:55.660 that you can, you can trust in me. You know that you do trust in me. You are proving it to yourself.

00:40:01.300 And then there's the second part of this, which is showing each other.

00:40:07.960 If you were the only person in Egypt who was putting blood on your doorframe, 1.00

00:40:13.680 that'd be a lot scarier than looking across the street and seeing your neighbor doing it too.

00:40:21.240 And seeing the guy down the block and seeing two people, two houses down.

00:40:26.420 Now, that communal strength that they drew from each other allowed them to do something so hard

00:40:37.000 and so scary and so kind of weird without as much fear.

00:40:44.480 So what can we take from this?

00:40:46.140 We have to be brave and show what we believe in for the world to learn from, right?

00:40:55.060 We need to be brave in what we know is good and right.

00:40:59.120 Even when it's hard, even when everyone else is fighting against it or telling us that we're bad or wrong.

00:41:07.500 And by taking the steps to do that, by doing it ourselves, we are proving to ourselves that we can do this,

00:41:15.020 that we are brave enough to do it, but it's not enough to do it on your own.

00:41:19.840 We need one another to lean on when we do the scary thing of standing up against what's wrong in the world.

00:41:28.240 When you know that somebody else is on your side and is doing the same thing with you,

00:41:34.440 you are so much stronger in the stance that you take.

00:41:38.000 So that means that A, build up and shore up your own support systems,

00:41:44.420 but B, if you can, speak out because somebody may feel more brave about speaking out themselves because you did.

00:41:55.080 And that multiplies, that grows the movement, both for God and for conservative values, traditional values.

00:42:10.140 Being brave publicly about our faith strengthens our faith, our own faith and then others' faith.

00:42:16.400 And that is so important.

00:42:20.420 So I think that's a really great lesson that we can learn this week is sometimes being brave,

00:42:28.940 showing what we believe, even when it's a little scary, is really important for ourselves,

00:42:39.800 strengthening our own faith and for others.

00:42:42.300 Strengthening our communities, strengthening our movements.

00:42:49.300 So that is today's faith talk.

00:42:53.060 But now let's get into our premium subscriber questions.

00:42:57.300 So once again, if you'd like to become a premium subscriber and submit questions for podcast episodes just like this,

00:43:04.200 make sure to head over to classicallyabby.substack.com and become a premium subscriber today.

00:43:09.540 Okay. So let's hop right into these questions.

00:43:12.520 Let's start with this one.

00:43:14.180 How do you deal with and process negative comments on your posts, videos, etc.?

00:43:20.040 Unfortunately, by virtue of being in the public eye and on the right,

00:43:23.940 I see comments on your posts that are full of hate and ignorance all the time.

00:43:27.980 Do these ever get to you or bother you?

00:43:29.840 Do they slide off like water off a duck's back?

00:43:32.300 Is there anything specific that you do that helps that you find helps you ignore or move past these types of comments?

00:43:40.060 So I do get this question often because I do get a lot of negative comments on Instagram, on Twitter, on YouTube, really anywhere.

00:43:50.600 And the truth is, I'm very blessed in that the comments don't bother me very often.

00:43:59.360 I find that if you know what you're saying is the truth, not your truth, there is no such thing as your truth, is the truth.

00:44:08.880 Then it doesn't matter what anyone says because you are, they're just wrong.

00:44:15.320 And I think that that is the, the big thing is that when someone is just wrong, it can't bother you.

00:44:22.920 It would be like if somebody said to you, your hair is ugly because it's blue.

00:44:28.100 When you have brown hair, you'd just be like, well, that's okay, but my hair isn't blue.

00:44:33.880 So you're wrong on both accounts.

00:44:37.220 That's how I feel about a lot of the comments is that they're wrong.

00:44:40.760 So how can I be offended by something that's just incorrect?

00:44:44.160 Now, if somebody gets something, I don't know, closer to my, uh, to the correct, to, to really being true about me, I don't know if that's happened, but let's say, or rather,

00:44:59.400 I guess the real point is if somebody says something that is incorrect and that people pick up as truth, that really, that can kind of bother me.

00:45:09.880 I don't like that.

00:45:11.220 Um, so for a while, for example, there were photos going around the internet of another woman who had been mistaken for me.

00:45:22.080 And they were inappropriate photos, very inappropriate photos.

00:45:25.460 And people were saying that I had inappropriate photos on the internet that initially, it doesn't anymore, but it initially bothered me because a lot of people thought that was true.

00:45:38.900 That I had inappropriate photos on the internet.

00:45:41.080 And they were not of me, they were never of me.

00:45:44.260 They were of another woman who I've actually, uh, messaged before who she felt very sad that this had happened to her and then felt bad that it had transferred onto me.

00:45:54.280 Um, so that was annoying.

00:45:56.640 That was upsetting because it's like falsehoods are being propagated against my, against me as a person.

00:46:05.000 But when people are arguing against my, what I talk about or saying mean things about me because of what I believe, then I don't care because it's like, you know what, it's just not true.

00:46:16.800 And that's okay.

00:46:18.400 I'm trying to think if there's anything else that I do that helps me ignore these comments.

00:46:22.460 But I think really it just comes down to informing yourself.

00:46:27.380 If you know more than the people who are commenting, if you know more than the people who disagree with you about the things you're talking about, then you won't feel upset when they argue with you because, or, or not even argue if they say just a mean thing in the comments because they just don't know and that's okay.

00:46:49.060 So that is the answer to that question.

00:46:51.480 But here's the question that I kind of teased in the intro.

00:46:54.180 So what's your opinion on IVF in vitro fertilization?

00:46:57.760 For those of you who don't know, I know as a pro-life woman, I think it's immoral to implant knowing that many embryos and babies will die.

00:47:06.060 Also, as a Catholic woman, I believe that the creation of life shouldn't be outside the marital act of sex, but I'm just so curious what your personal view is.

00:47:13.960 So this is an interesting conversation because I know that there are some people who are very against IVF in the pro-life movement.

00:47:20.460 I am not one of those people, but I have caveats.

00:47:24.880 So my feeling about IVF is that I think it's an amazing thing that we've developed the technology to help women who are struggling with fertility to conceive their own children.

00:47:37.440 I think that's really cool.

00:47:38.580 Now, I think that we are in an age where everything can be taken too far.

00:47:46.560 So, first of all, people think that they can do IVF and that, you know, I don't think most people think this way.

00:47:52.940 But we live in an age where people delay and delay and delay as far as their, as far as getting married and having children.

00:47:59.940 And then they just think, oh, well, I'll just do IVF later on.

00:48:02.540 I don't think that's positive.

00:48:03.860 I don't think that we should encourage women to put off the issue of their fertility until they're older and then depend on something like IVF to conceive.

00:48:12.980 I don't think that, and I know this is in a different realm, but I don't think something like, I still have to develop my thoughts on this, but I think for the most part, I'm against surrogacy.

00:48:22.320 I don't like surrogacy as an option.

00:48:24.980 I think that it's, again, we're getting into dangerous territory.

00:48:29.120 But a woman who, you know, is married young or tried to get married young and then is struggling with, you know, having her own children, I think IVF is an amazing modern medical miracle.

00:48:43.600 Like, it's very, very incredible, very cool.

00:48:46.700 So the caveats I have as far as IVF are the wasting of the embryos.

00:48:53.920 I think that that is awful, right?

00:48:56.320 Like, people will, they will fertilize just as many eggs as possible, and then they'll freeze them, and then if they don't want them, they'll throw them out.

00:49:04.960 I can't get behind that.

00:49:06.180 I think that the way that IVF should work and would be more moral is if you fertilized one egg at a time and then implanted one egg at a time so that you aren't trying to, you know, stick in as many eggs as possible to see how many will stick,

00:49:29.100 and then you're assuming that a certain amount are going to die in the process, or making so many that you then throw out a bunch of potential lives.

00:49:41.360 I think that that is, you know, really awful.

00:49:45.060 I recognize that what I'm saying would be very expensive, but I also think that who cares?

00:49:49.960 The expense doesn't matter in comparison to the amount of potential lives you aren't throwing away.

00:49:59.400 So my feeling is if we could create a system in which the eggs were fertilized one by one and implanted one by one, I could get on board with IVF, and I think it's really amazing that people can do it.

00:50:15.380 Um, that is what I think of as now, as I think is a good idea as of now, I would be open to learning more about it and understanding more so that I could be even more informed.

00:50:29.820 But after the research that I have done on this topic, that's where I'm comfortable.

00:50:34.900 Like, if somebody were to tell me that they wanted to do IVF, and that they were going to do it the way that I just described, I would say, more power to you.

00:50:44.200 Good luck having, you know, children.

00:50:46.080 I think that that's an amazing thing.

00:50:47.400 So that may not be the most popular answer, because I know that a lot of people are against IVF generally, but that is, I am not against IVF generally.

00:50:55.480 I think it can be really, a really special thing.

00:50:59.100 Um, it just has to be done the right way, because as of now, we are throwing out embryos all the time that, that to me is not okay, because life starts from conception.

00:51:13.080 So that's an issue.

00:51:16.900 The next question is, what happens when a bunch of influencers influence each other?

00:51:22.680 I thought that was a funny question.

00:51:25.900 I think that's really cute.

00:51:27.660 So the way, what happens when influencers influence each other is that everyone ends up trying the same thing, seeing if it's actually as good as you, as their influencer that influenced them said, and then sharing it with their followers.

00:51:42.840 But the truth is that influencers are always influencing each other, because most of the time, and I generally use the term content creator, because I don't like the idea of saying I'm an influencer.

00:51:55.040 I don't think that I am, I would say I'm more of a content creator, but I follow a lot of other content creators, so I'm constantly getting ideas from them for things to try.

00:52:05.420 And I'm super grateful about that, because I have learned about so many things, especially now that I have a son.

00:52:10.940 I've learned about so many little toys and different things that he can use that I never would have known about had I not followed other people.

00:52:19.780 So what happens when, you know, you follow influencers is that influencers follow each other.

00:52:25.800 So something gets picked up by one of them, and then another person who follows them picks it up, and they have a bunch of followers, and then everybody is trying the same things all at once all the time.

00:52:36.020 And it's a really funny thing, but that's kind of how it works, and I'm really grateful for it, because I've gotten to try so many different products that were so helpful, especially as a new mom, but also just outside of that.

00:52:50.500 I mean, like, I've learned about different mops and different Bissell products to clean my house, and all of these different things that I never would have learned about had it not been for the other people that I follow who are also influencers.

00:53:04.680 So that's what happens.

00:53:07.600 Last question is kind of a funny question.

00:53:10.420 I wrote an article, and I mentioned that I got a water play table for my son for his birthday.

00:53:18.500 It's really for his birthday party.

00:53:19.880 And someone said, can you tell us more about this water table?

00:53:22.600 So, yes, I can.

00:53:24.080 There are a lot of water play tables, devices, things like that, that you can buy, and they're great for summertime, but they're also great if you live in a warm state like Florida.

00:53:35.520 And they are just a lot of fun because they're clean, right?

00:53:40.020 It's just water.

00:53:41.040 So you're not trying to deal with washing out paint or dealing with any other messy thing.

00:53:46.300 It's just water that they're getting to play with in a cool way.

00:53:49.020 And so I got one from Bye Bye Baby, but you can buy a bunch on Amazon.

00:53:53.740 I'm actually buying a second one that's a little different.

00:53:56.300 So there are ones that have all of the fun pieces built in that are kind of like waterfalls.

00:54:03.200 And they have toys that kind of catch the water and pour it down, and it's a lot of fun for kiddos.

00:54:10.400 But then there's also actual water tables, which are tables that then have kind of bins in them, and you fill those bins with water and toys and bubbles and other things, and kids can play with those in the water, and it's a sensory experience for them.

00:54:25.460 And sensory stuff, I've learned seeing my son play with his food is very important for them to kind of get used to different textures and get used to how things feel on their fingers and all of that.

00:54:36.880 But I will quickly say, I think I recently read something about water beads that are very dangerous.

00:54:46.220 So when I recommend a water table, a water play table, I'm usually talking about using just toys, like plastic toys that go in the water or something else, bubbles or something like that.

00:54:58.480 But I've heard dangerous things about water beads, so please don't do your own research, but please don't use those because I don't know enough about it.

00:55:06.480 But that is it for today's episode of the Classically Abbey podcast.

00:55:11.400 I hope you guys enjoyed it.

00:55:13.000 Let me know your thoughts in the comments on YouTube or become a Premium Substack subscriber today to leave your comments over there.

00:55:19.300 If you would like to become a subscriber to the podcast, you can find us on, you can find me on Apple Podcasts, on Spotify, really anywhere you listen to podcasts.

00:55:30.540 You can find the Classically Abbey podcast to listen to, and I'll see you guys in my next episode.

00:55:35.340 Bye!

00:55:49.300 Bye!

00:55:50.300 Bye!

Classically Abby - January 31, 2023

Prince Harry's ＂SPARE＂ Is A DISASTER ⧸⧸ Ep. 4 ＊book review＊

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