In this episode of the classically abbey podcast, we discuss Meghan Markle and Prince Harry's relationship and how it affects the royal family. We also talk about why Meghan and Harry should have a more private life and why they should not be in the public eye.
00:11:15.200Having the ability to just sit down and write down everything I need to do.
00:11:19.600And then I, like, throughout the day will go back to that list, cross things off.
00:11:24.640Or I will reorganize them based on priority.
00:11:28.140And by the end of the day, like, the page that I have marked out for that day has so many notes and scribbles on it that has helped me figure out, okay, so this took longer than I expected.
00:11:47.780So, if you are like me and you think on paper, because that's really what it is, I think on paper, then I really recommend picking up a notebook.
00:11:57.600Because I like having one that I enjoy picking up.
00:12:00.300Buy some pens you like or find one around your house.
00:12:03.480And just have a piece of paper always available to you to write down little notes, to write down your to-do list, to write down your schedule, and keep your head on straight as you're kind of taking on the day.
00:12:15.460So, let's get into the main portion of today's episode, which is nine ways to embrace singledom as a classic woman.
00:12:25.120So, as you know, here on my podcast and on my YouTube channel, I talk a lot about faith, family, and community.
00:12:33.200And I talk about how important marriage and motherhood is.
00:12:37.020Now, I think those things are really important.
00:12:39.520But as a single person, I think that we can feel guilty or not worthy or like our lives don't matter until we get married and have children.
00:12:51.740And that is not the point I'm trying to get across here.
00:12:53.760One thing I do want to clarify before getting into the main bit of what we're talking about is my content is really geared towards explaining to those women who don't know that it's important to make their lives conducive to having children and a family.
00:13:13.500That that that is the goal, right, that everything else, all this leftist narrative, all this media that's going to tell you that it's important for you to find yourself outside of marriage and family, that that stuff is really not going to make you happy.
00:13:30.380And so when I am being a proponent of this stuff, it's from the perspective of trying to convince those women who or at least give them a space to pursue tradition and pursue the things that traditionally have made women happy and that they don't have to feel guilty about that.
00:13:50.980So when I talk about marriage and family, that's where that's coming from.
00:13:54.140It is not meant to make those women who are actively trying to find a husband or are actively trying to have children feel bad about themselves because you get the project like you understand what we're here for, but your path may not be there yet or you may be going in a different direction and that's OK.
00:14:14.480So I think that being single is actually great and I loved being single.
00:14:19.560There's a reason that we weren't born in pairs.
00:14:22.520There's a reason that we weren't born with the person we're going to end up with and that we don't have children immediately, right?
00:14:29.360Because there is an important stage of singleness that allows us to become better on our own so that when we come together with our future spouse, we already know what we're about and or we can grow with them.
00:14:42.840But it's not supposed to be that you are with the person you're going to end up with from the time you're born.
00:14:48.540That's just not the way it's supposed to be.
00:14:51.280So if God didn't build the world that way, then it's important that we understand the importance of this single era of our lives.
00:14:57.960And I want to talk about how you can enjoy it as a classic woman, how you can really learn to love this time of your life, even if you are interested in a bigger goal later on.
00:15:11.840Like something I talk about and I have mentioned before is the idea that you can love where you're at while also having an eye towards the future.
00:15:20.800You don't have to hate where you're at in order to make moves to change or make moves to do something different.
00:15:42.800You can enjoy being who you are and comfortable in your skin while also saying, I'd like to lose a couple pounds to be healthier or I'd like to lose a couple pounds so that I can fit into clothes a little bit differently.
00:15:53.320But that doesn't mean I hate where I'm at.
00:16:48.840I would like take myself out to a restaurant, read a book, get a glass of wine and just enjoy myself.
00:16:54.920I would go to museums by myself, which I cannot recommend enough.
00:16:59.280Going to a museum on your own, on your own schedule where you don't have to follow someone else around, where you can just sit and take in the art as much and as in your own way as possible, where you can sit and sketch if you want to.
00:17:12.380And you don't feel the pressure to move on and just taking a whole day and enjoying it.
00:17:18.380There's something so special about the time of being single where you get to do this.
00:17:24.000You don't really get to do this at other parts of your life where you'll just do things alone because you can, because you want to.
00:17:33.000Just I loved seeing movies by myself because I liked the chilled out nature of it where no one else was.
00:17:41.000I wasn't looking at somebody else for their reaction.
00:17:43.240I could just take in the movie on my own and see what I thought.
00:17:46.520Like I wasn't constantly checking in with the person next to me.
00:17:49.940Are they thinking it's funny or do they think this is boring?
00:17:52.920It was just my own experience on my own.
00:17:56.580I loved going out to lunch by myself because I didn't have to like sit there and talk to someone or impress them.
00:18:03.640It was just about me enjoying the food.
00:18:06.640Now, when you're married, obviously it's not like that.
00:18:09.260You're with somebody you love and you're enjoying eating with them.
00:18:11.700But there is something really special about going to a restaurant, reading a book and hanging out by yourself.
00:18:19.100And I just think we don't take advantage of that enough when we're single.
00:18:23.480We're always and I understand because, again, this is something I think about a lot, the idea of this fear of loneliness.
00:18:30.980But there's also something to be said for solitude.
00:18:34.960And solitude is rarer as you get married and as you have children.
00:18:39.980So this time of your life where you are single, take advantage of the solitude and do things on your own schedule.
00:19:07.200You can also listen to podcasts if you don't really want to walk around in the silence.
00:19:13.520I mean, I think that there is something to be said for walking around in silence.
00:19:16.080But you can also put on some music, which I've done, just because it's like giving yourself a background score while you are experiencing life.
00:20:33.140I think that we don't do that enough in today's day and age.
00:20:35.600And it makes me really sad because I've found that people aren't comfortable having people at their homes because they think of it as like too much work.
00:20:42.720You will stand out if you are the person who hosts in your friend group.
00:20:47.400You will become that person that people think of as responsible, as fun, as dependable, but also as just a cool person.
00:20:56.380I mean, and then you can branch out like you can start off with just your girlfriends.
00:21:00.260And then if you want to start doing social events at your home or at your apartment, then you can meet people.
00:21:09.240You can sort of create a situation where you are setting up your own singles events in a way.
00:21:14.500And that's a fun way to introduce yourself to new people.
00:21:19.440I have this idea that I've mentioned to people before that you can do parties where it's like every person needs to bring someone that the host hasn't met.
00:21:28.480And so then you're getting a really cool, eclectic group of people, but they've been vetted by the people you already like.
00:21:34.300So you know that you're probably going to like the people they're bringing to.
00:22:00.340Now, you're always constantly changing, but this is the time of your life where you're really figuring out who you are.
00:22:07.580And so choosing clothing, figuring out your style at this point is going to be so much fun because you can choose what you want to wear, what you like, and really not take into consideration your spouse's tastes.
00:22:22.020So when you get married, it's important to dress in a way that your spouse finds attractive, that your spouse likes, that your spouse enjoys.
00:22:29.200And when you are single, you don't have to worry about that quite yet.
00:22:33.100So you can just figure out your style.
00:22:35.440Now, most of the time, the way that you dress actually will attract the kind of guy who is attracted to that style of dressing.
00:22:41.940So if you discover that you really like to wear a lot of flower print dresses, because that is a reflection of your personality, you'll find that the guys you're attracting are attracted to women who wear flower print dresses.
00:22:57.200If you haven't really discovered your style yet, if you're just kind of doing leggings and sweatshirts, which not to say that's not to say that isn't a style, but if you're doing it just because it's easy and without thinking, then you might address you might attract guys who like that style.
00:23:12.260And then as you discover your sense of style afterwards, maybe your husband doesn't like it so much.
00:23:18.120And then you kind of have to balance things a little more.
00:23:20.440Whereas if you figure out your style before you meet your husband, then you are attracting a guy who also likes the way that you dress.
00:25:31.520So this is the time to take an art class or to audition for a theater production that you want to try out for and see if you get to do because you'll have time to go to the rehearsals.
00:25:42.060I love the idea of finding things to do with your time that are both productive in the sense that you're creating something and actually just creative.
00:25:53.740Like you're doing something wonderful with your time where at the end you're saying, oh, I learned something or I made a project or I'm participating in a production that I'm really proud of.
00:26:04.140And that's something that you get to do when you're single.
00:26:06.360You'll have the opportunity, the time to do those things and you're improving yourself.
00:26:11.860These are such classic things that you get to take advantage of when you are single.
00:26:17.020So number four is go to art classes or audition for theater productions.
00:26:22.980Number five is volunteer for causes you care about.
00:26:27.380It's so important at this stage to put yourself in positions where you can help the things that you care about.
00:26:42.040Volunteering for pro-life organizations, volunteering at pregnancy crisis centers, you can make a difference in people's lives by giving your time for free.
00:26:54.780And think about already by all of the things that I'm talking about, like how much more you'll have on your schedule if you do these things and all in a positive way.
00:27:04.560Like you won't have time to be lonely if you are volunteering and going to art classes or being in theater productions or experimenting with your style, like hosting parties for your girlfriends.
00:27:15.960You're not going to have time to be lonely.
00:27:18.060And one of the things I always say, I'm getting a little sidetracked here, but one of the things I always say is dating a person who is busy is very attractive.
00:27:27.280When a guy asks you, are you busy like Thursday night or are you busy so and so time?
00:27:36.800If you are always free, it's much less attractive than if you are like, no, actually, I'm busy that night, but I'd be free this night.
00:27:44.640It's great when you have a busy schedule because then it doesn't look like you're desperate.
00:27:49.020And the truth is, you don't want to be desperate.
00:27:50.760You don't want to have so much free time that you are always open to any date at any time that a guy offers.
00:27:59.160You would rather have other engagements and other things that you're doing with your life and then dating fits into that.
00:28:06.580So volunteering for causes you care about is number five, and I think that's really important.
00:28:17.340It's always, you're always learning something, you're always enjoying time by a fireplace or with a cup of tea or in your little reading nook, and you're just learning something, reading something, taking new information in.
00:28:50.220And don't turn down opportunities to do other things because you're reading.
00:28:54.940I think that can cross into dangerous territory.
00:28:56.720But I think that if you have a few off minutes in an evening, instead of immediately hopping on Netflix or immediately hopping on Amazon Prime, consider just pulling out a book and reading.
00:29:06.960Because you'll always feel better when you finish a book than when you finish a movie.
00:29:29.460So number six is read as much as you can.
00:29:33.480Number seven is find a church or a synagogue that you love.
00:29:38.480This is the time to find a faith community that you enjoy.
00:29:44.920And it's hard to do when you're single.
00:29:46.460Because a lot of faith communities are built around married families.
00:29:50.680But there are faith communities that are built for singles.
00:29:53.220And that doesn't necessarily mean that that's going to be the one that you stick with, obviously, after you get married and have children.
00:29:59.080But at least having that support system when you're single can really make your life so good and much better.
00:30:08.480Because other people are going through what you're going through.
00:30:10.980And you're getting to serve God with people who are in the same place and stage of life.
00:30:15.220Now, that doesn't mean that you can't find a church or synagogue that has a mix.
00:30:19.280I mean, there are a ton that I know of where you have singles as well as married couples with kids.
00:30:25.760And everybody is together, which is a really great thing.
00:30:28.740Because then you're getting to participate in the lives of young children, even when you don't have children yourself, which I think is always wonderful.
00:30:35.020But finding a good church or synagogue that you connect with will make all the difference when you are single.
00:30:42.660Because you will have that strength that comes from being part of a good faith community.
00:31:01.040I think a lot of people don't take, don't know how to be around kids nowadays.
00:31:06.300Like, unless you are from a family that has a lot of children and then your siblings have kids, a lot of people don't know how to be around children.
00:32:52.940But unless a guy's a creep or just really not a good idea, say yes to every first date.
00:33:00.300And you can decide what the length of that date will be in the sense that if it's a really promising situation, then maybe you can say, okay, I'll go to a movie and dinner with you.
00:33:09.720Or if it's somebody who you're like, I doubt that this is going to be anything, like maybe just a cup of coffee.
00:33:16.000But never say no because you don't know who the right guy is going to be.
00:33:20.580It might be someone who totally surprises you.
00:33:22.520And saying no to somebody that you assume is bad for you is just that.
00:33:41.400It teaches you how to interact and get comfortable with someone in a weird situation because let's be honest, dating is weird.
00:33:48.400So going on as many dates as you can is my last piece of advice for how to embrace singledom as a classic woman.
00:33:58.120So those are the nine ways that you can go ahead and embrace this time of your life.
00:34:03.720I think that you are an amazing time of your life and you should feel really good about it, even if you are looking towards the future and you hope for more.
00:35:59.080He doesn't want to see them overtake the Egyptians and he doesn't like the Jews.
00:36:02.760So that's why all of this is happening.
00:36:04.760He calls to Hebrew midwives and tells them that they're the ones who are going to take care of these Jewish boys.
00:36:10.440And they tell them they tell Pharaoh that they can't get there in time because the women are so adept at bearing the children themselves like they're their own midwives.
00:36:19.220But Pharaoh doubles down on his decree.
00:36:25.080His mother, Yochaved, I don't know how to say that in English, hides him for three months.
00:36:30.160But when she can no longer hide him, she pushes him out into the Nile in a basket where he is rescued by none other than Pharaoh's daughter.
00:36:37.860She asks for a Hebrew nursemaid and a little girl named Miriam, who happens to be Moses' brother, sister, rather,
00:36:45.960runs home to her own mother and uses Moses' own mother as his nursemaid.
00:36:53.360So it's interesting because he's partly raised in Pharaoh's home, which is obviously incredibly Egyptian,
00:36:58.100and partly raised in his own mother's home, which is very Jewish.
00:37:01.680When he's grown, he sees an Egyptian striking a Jewish slave, and he kills the Egyptian.
00:37:09.240When Moses realizes what he's done and that people are beginning to know what he's done, he runs away to Midian.
00:37:18.280There, he helps seven young women draw water from a well that a bunch of mean goat herds or shepherds had chased them away from.
00:38:06.360Your brother is going to help you because Moses had a stutter, and Aaron, his brother, did not, and he was going to orate for him.
00:38:14.600So God speaks to Moses and directs him to return to Egypt and save the Jewish people.
00:38:20.260On Moses' way back to Egypt, he is attacked by a snake, monster kind of thing, and it's because he hadn't circumcised his son.
00:38:31.840So Sipporah recognized this because the snake had kind of swallowed Moses up until his nether regions, and she figured out, oh, this is a sign because we didn't circumcise our baby boy, because we didn't know whether like there would be time for him to recover between our travel from Midian to Egypt.
00:38:51.780But we were supposed to have done it, but we were supposed to have done it, but I can't believe we didn't do it.
00:38:54.640So she quickly circumcises her son and saves Moses' life.
00:38:59.260Moses and Aaron go to Pharaoh and ask him to release the Jews, and he only makes their work even harder and punishes them even more.
00:39:06.940And that's just the first Torah portion.
00:42:50.360They are intuitive and can understand when God's message is being sent and can understand what God was trying to communicate with Sipporah and Moses.
00:43:03.180Through their womanhood, they are strong.