Classically Abby - March 01, 2022


What I'm MOST Scared Of For MOTHERHOOD ⧸⧸ Classic Chats With Abby


Episode Stats


Length

13 minutes

Words per minute

178.88829

Word count

2,433

Sentence count

105

Harmful content

Hate speech

1

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode, I talk about the fear of motherhood and how it s almost here! I also talk about how I m feeling this close to meeting my son and what I m worried about as a mother.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 Hello Classic Crew and welcome to today's video where we're going to be talking about
00:00:04.620 how I'm feeling this close to motherhood.
00:00:13.040 If you are new to my channel, here we talk about classic living and traditional values
00:00:17.720 and I would love if you would consider subscribing and hitting that notification bell
00:00:21.260 and I'd also love it if you would subscribe to my Substack newsletter where you will get
00:00:25.620 access to a ton of exclusive content including my book club and exclusive weekly articles
00:00:31.320 and it's really where our community is growing and flourishing and I've just had the most amazing
00:00:37.160 time getting to know you guys. We do Zoom calls once a month where we do book clubs and I've
00:00:42.380 actually gotten to speak to so many of you guys and so I've really loved it. So if you're interested
00:00:47.160 in subscribing head over to classicallyabby.substack.com. So recently on my channel I've been doing
00:00:53.240 kind of a series of just sharing my thoughts and talking about my feelings as I've been changing
00:01:00.080 as a person through my pregnancy. I do feel like so many different things have been brought to the
00:01:07.180 forefront of my mind and I've really enjoyed the opportunity to talk and share about it with you
00:01:12.340 all and hear your thoughts and opinions on it. So videos like this are not intended to change anyone's
00:01:17.340 mind. They're really just a place for us to discuss and chat and share our ideas.
00:01:22.860 So today I want to talk about motherhood. How it's almost here. My due date is about four weeks away.
00:01:31.500 I'm 36 weeks and you know it's so real now. So I'm really excited to get into today's video. So let's
00:01:38.920 start. So the first thing I want to talk about is how I was feeling about three weeks ago and how I was
00:01:47.940 afraid of meeting our son. You know I think that it's it's a really scary idea that you're about to
00:01:54.520 meet a whole other person who you're just going to have these incredible emotions and feelings for
00:01:59.880 and you can't experience it until you've experienced it. So I don't know if you've been there if you are
00:02:08.000 a mother there's this fear of like what what if I don't know my kid? What if I don't have that feeling
00:02:14.680 that everyone describes? And I really I kind of talked to my mom about it because I was feeling
00:02:20.660 a little bit worried and I talked to Jacob about it and actually he was the one who gave me some
00:02:25.920 insight and because I've loved being pregnant so much and I'm really gonna miss it and I'm really
00:02:32.300 gonna miss having this little little guy inside of me. Jacob said to me you know I think that it's
00:02:38.340 natural for you to feel like you know who he is in there and you don't know who he's gonna be when
00:02:44.700 he's born and that was just such a good way of putting it. Once Jacob kind of verbalized that
00:02:52.420 feeling of I know this guy who's who's been inside of me I know this guy who's growing I know this little
00:02:59.380 boy but I don't know what he's gonna look like I don't know anything about him really once he's
00:03:05.920 outside and kind of verbalizing that actually allowed me to get more excited about meeting him.
00:03:13.840 It made me go oh I I do know this little boy I know him I'm I've grown him and it's just a matter
00:03:22.500 of me getting to meet him in a sense. I think that that really just put into perspective the fear I was
00:03:29.380 having of like who is this little baby gonna be? No no no I know who he is he's just he's just
00:03:35.640 here now inside my belly and not born yet. That made me feel so much more excited to meet him and
00:03:42.560 now I'm like on the edge of my seat. I can't wait but I know that there is a fear I would assume for
00:03:48.620 many of us of I hope I feel this feeling that everyone says is gonna happen when I have my baby
00:03:54.740 where this is everything to me. So I'd really love if you would share your thoughts and feelings in the
00:04:01.680 comments if you are somebody like me if you're in the in your pregnancy and you've had that fear
00:04:06.680 or if you've already had a child and you kind of now know that that was a fear that didn't need to
00:04:12.780 have happened or if you're somebody who isn't pregnant yet but you felt that fear just outside
00:04:18.500 of anything. I think that's just an interesting thing to talk about. Something else I've been thinking
00:04:23.140 about is what I'm the most worried about as a mother. I'm not worried about him as an infant and what I
00:04:31.600 would do to him that I would be like a bad mother to a baby because there's only so much you can do
00:04:37.960 wrong in the sense of he sleeps, he eats, he goes to the bathroom. So if I'm there for all of those
00:04:44.300 things and take care of him for all of those things there's really not too much that I can mess up.
00:04:49.400 The stuff that I think about and I get worried about as a mother is you know when he's old enough
00:04:56.060 to ask questions and when he's old enough to remember my behavior and I want to make sure that
00:05:02.160 he always looks back on us raising him in a really positive way and he feels excited about what we're
00:05:10.260 teaching him. That's a really big responsibility and I think it's a it's a really wonderful responsibility
00:05:17.080 that God gives us that we are able to influence and shape our children's minds
00:05:23.440 but it's also scary because there's so much that you can that you can mess up.
00:05:30.940 As my mom always says you're never going to get out of this life without a skinned knee
00:05:35.920 in the sense that you know no matter what you do even if you're a wonderful parent there's no such thing
00:05:41.900 as a perfect parent and your child is always going to have some problems with what you did
00:05:47.860 growing up and I'm sure that's just part and parcel of being a parent and and I'm prepared for that in
00:05:54.220 a sense but I would really and it's important to me that we do our utmost to give our child and give
00:06:02.500 our children the opportunity to look at their childhood fondly and that's that's what's important
00:06:09.920 to me. One of the things that I've been thinking about too is just about how all the sources that
00:06:15.220 are available to us is is just so overwhelming. It's like the worst form of decision fatigue. I don't
00:06:22.020 know if you've heard this uh before I don't know if you've heard that phrase before but decision fatigue
00:06:28.020 is the idea that we can only make so many decisions in a day before our brains just go enough now and you
00:06:34.540 just can't make any more choices. With parenting I feel like that's a constant battle. You're just
00:06:41.740 constantly faced with choices especially with the onslaught of information presented to us.
00:06:47.140 Should we do this? Should we do that? Should we sleep train? Should we cry it out? Should we not do any
00:06:53.420 of that? Should we do attachment parenting? I mean there's so many different ways to parent and you have
00:06:58.120 to ultimately make the choice that's best for your family but there's so many choices to make
00:07:03.560 and you know I guess we're lucky that we have access to so much information and we have access
00:07:09.620 to so many different options so that we can make informed decisions but it's also like oh my gosh
00:07:15.060 this is a lot which is why I think it's so nice and so lovely that I have you know my family to go to
00:07:22.440 for advice. I have Jacob's family to go to for advice. I can see and put into practice things
00:07:28.900 from people around me who I respect and love and who I think are good at parenting and say okay well
00:07:35.400 I want to do the same thing or maybe I want to do some things differently and seeing it in practice
00:07:39.760 as opposed to trying to do everything from scratch. I think that's something I remember reading
00:07:45.400 somewhere is that it's not always the best idea to try and approach parenting as if you're doing it
00:07:51.560 from scratch because there are traditions that have made sense for so long regarding parenting
00:07:59.320 and children that really do work and you don't always have to go to the newest idea to raise your
00:08:06.700 kids but I'd be curious to know how did you choose what was best for your parenting style? Did you kind
00:08:12.500 of go to family? Did you read a lot of books? Or if you aren't a parent yet what would you go to look
00:08:19.380 for? Do you think that you would like want to copy your parents or do you think that you would seek
00:08:24.720 out advice on the internet? That kind of thing. I'm curious to know. So what am I the most confident
00:08:30.400 about with motherhood, entering motherhood? Having Jacob alongside me. I am so excited to parent
00:08:38.900 alongside my husband. Jacob is such a good man. He's such a good husband and he will be such an amazing
00:08:45.300 father. I have no doubt. And we really agree on all the fundamentals and all the basics about parenting
00:08:51.620 so we really can support each other in this journey and we both are really intent on being
00:08:58.880 intentional and deliberate with our parenting. So we really want to come to each other and be able
00:09:03.780 to say you know I noticed that you did this today and I don't think maybe that was the best approach
00:09:07.320 or this was a really wonderful thing you did today and let's try and keep that up in the future
00:09:12.660 because I want to do that too. You know I think that having Jacob alongside me is it is just the
00:09:19.320 best feeling in the world to know that I have the best partner in the world to raise this little boy.
00:09:24.560 I think it can be very easy to fall into this trap as as mothers that we are going to have to go into
00:09:33.400 all of this alone even though our husbands are right there. But because pregnancy is very you know
00:09:39.900 we're the ones going through it even though our husbands are supporting us it can almost kind of
00:09:44.480 give you this feeling of like oh motherhood is going to be alone too and not at all. As soon as I
00:09:50.420 think about Jacob being this most active participant as a father and a husband it like makes all of my
00:09:58.580 stress about motherhood go away because I know that I'll have him there and I know how wonderful he's
00:10:04.420 going to be in helping me and helping me raise this boy and being such a good father. The thing
00:10:11.380 that I'm looking forward to the most is this new phase of life is starting our family. It's so funny
00:10:18.900 because when we got pregnant I don't feel like emotionally connected to this specific pregnancy.
00:10:30.160 I view it as the first of many which is a nice perspective to have in a sense because it's like
00:10:38.300 now we're on this stage of life. Now we're on this phase of life. It's not like oh I really have to
00:10:43.460 cling to this pregnancy because it might be only one of two or something. Because I view this as
00:10:50.080 now we are starting our family and now this is the first of many times I'm going to do this. Please
00:10:55.500 God with God's help. Of course I value this pregnancy. Of course I value this baby. Oh my gosh. But
00:11:02.420 it's also part and parcel of something greater and a bigger journey that we're on. And that's really
00:11:11.840 exciting. I'm so excited to now be entering motherhood and seeing what this is going to be
00:11:19.940 like. You know not just to this little boy but to his siblings. I can't wait to have a full house.
00:11:27.620 That is just a dream. It's truly a dream. And I'm really I'm just I'm very grateful for this whole
00:11:37.260 experience of getting to carry my son and getting to hopefully do that many more times. And viewing
00:11:45.620 this pregnancy as just the first one. It's not the end of my time before being a mother. It's the
00:11:53.260 beginning of this new stage. I uh I'm just really excited. So that that's something I'm like I'm on
00:12:01.480 the edge of my seat for. I'm now at the point where I'm so ready to meet this little boy. Like it's
00:12:07.320 really interesting. I don't fear labor. I think I did for a while. Absolutely I did. I know I did.
00:12:15.220 But at this point I'm just like let's do this. I'm ready. It's I'm sure it's not gonna be fun. But
00:12:20.300 I've also you know I've heard people's stories positive birth stories that make me really excited.
00:12:28.180 That make me really excited for the opportunity. But also to meet my boy and that first meeting. I mean
00:12:35.640 you can't do anything better than that. Truly. So that I think is where I'm gonna end it today.
00:12:43.860 But I would love to hear your thoughts in the comments. If you aren't already subscribed to
00:12:47.660 my channel make sure to subscribe and hit that notification bell. If you want to subscribe to
00:12:52.260 my Substack newsletter and join our community over there I would love if you would head over to
00:12:56.200 classicallyabby.substack.com. And if you'd like to follow me on social media it's at
00:13:00.660 classicallyabby absolutely everywhere. I also wanted to mention at the end of this video I'll probably
00:13:05.540 say it in a couple more videos that I am going to be having a baby soon. So I will be trying to
00:13:13.560 get as much pre-recorded as possible before this baby comes. But I may have to go on some sort of
00:13:19.780 maternity leave. And if I'm not on YouTube for a while that's why as you might imagine. So just so 0.87
00:13:27.880 you're aware I may have to take a break from YouTube after this baby's born. Thank you so much for watching
00:13:32.860 and I'll see you guys in my next video. Bye!