Classically Abby - Why You SHOULD Marry Within Your Faith ｜｜ You'll end up more fulfilled in the long run!

00:00:00.000 Hello beautiful ladies and welcome to today's video where we're going to be 1.00

00:00:03.820 talking about why it's so important to marry within your faith.

00:00:10.120 So I'm really excited to share a new giveaway with you guys. Please wait till

00:00:15.320 the end of the video and I will mention it at the end. As you guys may have seen

00:00:19.220 on my channel, I am a religious Jew. I was raised Orthodox, my husband was raised

00:00:24.040 Reform, and together the two of us are hoping to become more observant over

00:00:28.180 time. But for me, one of the things that was so important to me throughout the

00:00:32.320 time that I was dating was that whoever I ended up with had to be Jewish. I knew

00:00:37.120 that I wanted them to share my faith and I knew that was incredibly important to

00:00:41.320 me. So I really wanted to talk about today why it is so important to marry

00:00:45.460 someone who shares your faith and how that can affect your entire life. So

00:00:50.340 let's get started. The first reason that it matters why you should marry someone in 0.89

00:00:54.220 your faith is when you raise your children. Now I know this is the most

00:00:57.760 obvious one. This is the one that all of your parents are probably telling you, but

00:01:01.480 it is really important. So for me, my Judaism is so much to me. It's so much a

00:01:07.880 part of who I am. It's part of my cultural heritage but it's also a part of my

00:01:12.160 belief system. I turn to God when I'm upset or when I'm happy and my faith has

00:01:16.940 gotten me through so much. Now the idea of not celebrating Passover or lighting the

00:01:22.780 Shabbos candles with my children is kind of unthinkable to me. I cannot wait to

00:01:28.660 hear them pray to God when they're having trouble or to celebrate Passover

00:01:33.160 and Sukkot and all of the Jewish holidays with them. That's just so exciting to me.

00:01:38.200 And of course that doesn't even mention the importance of the value system that I

00:01:42.760 believe Judaism will give my children. If I were to marry somebody who didn't 0.96

00:01:48.160 believe the same things that I did, there would be this constant friction

00:01:51.160 between me and my husband about how we wanted to raise our children and what

00:01:56.140 kind of faith base we wanted to give them. As well, I don't want my children to 0.96

00:02:00.280 ever fear that they're not really a part of any culture. I want them to feel so

00:02:04.540 enveloped in their culture in a nice warm family-like way that they don't ever

00:02:09.700 even doubt it. My husband and I can't wait to start a family because we want to

00:02:14.740 have children and raise them in this way, which we believe is part of their

00:02:19.300 culture and also will impart beautiful values. When you get married, one of the

00:02:23.920 most important things that you're doing is not only choosing a partner but

00:02:27.620 choosing a father for your children. And the father of your children should share

00:02:32.200 in the belief system and values that you have so that the two of you can impart

00:02:36.880 that to your children. If you are a Christian and Christmas means a lot to you,

00:02:41.080 imagine being married to someone who doesn't care about that. That would be 1.00

00:02:44.920 really hard on you and it will be confusing for your children because the

00:02:48.520 two of you are not celebrating as a true family unit. Imparting values,

00:02:53.320 imparting beliefs, imparting a relationship with God, and giving your

00:02:57.400 children a chance to be part of a beautiful community, that is so important

00:03:02.020 in a marriage. And religion and sharing a religion is so much a part of that.

00:03:06.400 Religion is based in values, it's based in beliefs, and it's based in your community.

00:03:11.500 And if you don't marry a partner who shares your religion, you're not going to

00:03:14.980 be able to impart those beautiful things to your children in the same way because

00:03:19.660 they're constantly going to be feeling conflicted between mom and dad. You want

00:03:24.340 mom and dad to be sharing in this beautiful religion together with you. The

00:03:28.640 next reason why you should marry within your faith is that if you don't you

00:03:32.800 aren't allowing yourself room to grow. Faith is a constantly ever-changing thing.

00:03:38.620 It's sometimes really hard to believe in God and the connection can sometimes feel

00:03:42.400 distant and other times you feel God in the room with you. But if you are married

00:03:47.620 to someone who doesn't share your faith, you will feel nervous to engage with your

00:03:52.120 faith on a more intense level. Let's imagine that you decide you're going to

00:03:56.040 become more religious and you want to start attending church on Sundays. Let's say

00:04:00.380 you're married to a man who doesn't believe in God. It's scary for you to

00:04:04.220 engage with your faith more and to try and boost your relationship with God

00:04:07.640 because theoretically that could come between you and your spouse. If your

00:04:12.440 spouse really isn't comfortable with you becoming more religious because it would 0.66

00:04:16.040 change your lifestyle, there are only two options. You'll either end up exploring it

00:04:20.460 and the relationship with your spouse will become strained or you won't end up

00:04:24.960 exploring it because you're afraid that your relationship will become strained and

00:04:28.520 you prefer to have a good marriage. Now of course I understand the idea of

00:04:33.140 wanting to have a good marriage. That is number one. That's so important. But you're

00:04:37.780 blocking yourself off from growing in your relationship to God, from considering

00:04:42.620 these parts of yourself because you're so nervous that you'll actually have

00:04:47.540 conflict between you and your partner. Now that kind of thing doesn't happen if

00:04:52.820 you marry someone within the same faith. The two of you want to work on it

00:04:55.940 together. You guys are planning on growing as a team, as a couple, and it's not just

00:05:00.260 you growing and your partner staying stagnant or vice versa. And hey, I know

00:05:05.540 plenty of couples who didn't marry within their faith and they seem to be very

00:05:09.960 happy. But I have spoken with people who have mentioned to me that they do feel

00:05:14.600 sort of unfulfilled because they can't explore whatever they believe more deeply

00:05:19.160 because their partner doesn't understand it. So there may be this kind of level of

00:05:23.380 happiness that you're reaching because you're with someone that you love and you

00:05:26.160 share a wonderful life. But there's also a part of you that will be left

00:05:29.380 unfulfilled as you can't explore your relationship to God and your relationship

00:05:34.780 to faith without it upending the life you've built for yourself with someone

00:05:39.160 who doesn't share your faith. Marriage is so much better when you share faith as a

00:05:44.160 team. And that leads me into my third reason why you should marry within your 0.97

00:05:48.020 faith. Marrying within your faith means that when you are struggling with your

00:05:51.940 faith or you're celebrating in it, your partner can share in that with you

00:05:56.160 because your spouse understands and believes in the same God that you do.

00:06:01.100 There's something so magical about being able to share your faith with your

00:06:05.440 partner, with your spouse. Instead of them being on the sidelines, maybe cheering you

00:06:10.460 on as an outsider because it doesn't mean that they have to hate your faith. It

00:06:13.820 just means that they may not understand it. So they may even be supportive of your

00:06:17.940 journey, but they'll always be an outsider cheering you from the sidelines rather than

00:06:22.740 in the game with you, really excited and celebrating it together. Marriage is so

00:06:28.220 much about teamwork that choosing a teammate who isn't on the same page with

00:06:32.440 you when it comes to this most vital thing, this relationship with God, this

00:06:36.740 relationship to your values, this relationship to your beliefs, and this

00:06:40.020 relationship to your community, it doesn't seem like that's a marriage that's

00:06:43.960 going to get its full potential. My husband and I are constantly growing

00:06:48.180 together in our faith because I became less religious when I moved out of my

00:06:52.540 parents' house and my husband became more religious when the two of us met and

00:06:56.140 together we want to explore our faith together as Jews and that to me is so

00:07:01.360 exciting. It's so beautiful. I don't have to be afraid that he's going to judge my

00:07:06.380 exploration of my faith and he doesn't have to be afraid of me judging his

00:07:11.400 exploration of his faith because we have the same faith base and the two of us

00:07:15.540 are aiming for the same goal and that is just an incredible feeling. So I am a huge

00:07:21.480 advocate of marrying within your faith, finding support in your partner, growing

00:07:26.500 as a team, and not ignoring the pull you may have to grow in your faith because

00:07:32.540 you're afraid of how it will affect your partner. Please let me know in the

00:07:35.940 comments what you guys think about this, if you married within your faith, if you

00:07:39.520 think it's important. So now that you guys made it to the end of the video I'm

00:07:42.800 really excited to share a giveaway that I'm doing with another conservative

00:07:46.360 classic lady on Instagram. So her handle is RachelLynnJewelry and she and I are

00:07:51.760 working together to do a $50 giveaway to her Etsy store. She makes beautiful

00:07:56.640 jewelry. This is one of her pieces. I absolutely love it and we thought we

00:08:00.600 worked together just to give away something nice during this whole really

00:08:04.240 hard time during quarantine and give you guys an opportunity to win something.

00:08:08.960 And all you have to do to enter is be a subscriber here on YouTube, head over to

00:08:13.840 my Instagram and follow me, go ahead and follow at RachelLynnJewelry and comment on

00:08:19.420 my post. I'm going to put a post on my Instagram to friends that you think would

00:08:24.640 love this channel and would love a gift card to her beautiful jewelry store. Thank you

00:08:30.040 guys so much for watching today's video. Please subscribe to my channel and blog if

00:08:34.220 you haven't already, hit that notification bell to get notified of all my new

00:08:37.600 videos, hit that like button, head over to my Twitter, Instagram and Facebook and

00:08:41.800 follow me there. Please head over to classicallyabbey.locals.com if you want to

00:08:45.820 see more of this content, support my channel and be part of our community, and

00:08:49.120 and I'll see you guys in my next video. Bye!

Classically Abby - May 13, 2020

Why You SHOULD Marry Within Your Faith ｜｜ You'll end up more fulfilled in the long run!

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