Romans 12_14-16 ~ Part 5 - Thirty Marks of a True Christian
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Summary
In this episode, we continue our series on the 30 Marks of a True Christian, and focus on the command Bless those who persecute you, do good to those who hate you, bless and do not curse.
Transcript
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What a privilege this chapter has been to preach, but also to minister to my own soul.
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Now we're in a series, as you know, it's titled The 30 Marks of a True Christian.
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And as I have reiterated each week, chapter 12 marks this transition in the epistle to the Romans, which goes from gospel to behavior, because we know that belief informs behavior.
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Essentially, the apostle expects that what we know will inform how we live.
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And this is an important distinction because here lies the divide between legalism and grace.
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In other words, Christians don't obey for salvation, they obey from salvation.
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Your good works are the fruit of your redemption, and we know that Christ's finished work is the root.
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If we can keep that part intact, then we can lift high this holy call of obedience,
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knowing that it is just the outworking of the grace and mercy of God in us.
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Now, last week we covered Marks 11 and 12, which were contribute to the needs of the saints
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and seek to show hospitality. It was the start of several commands that really shifted from an
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inward worshipful focus to an outward devotion and love for others, which as a result makes them
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more difficult for the flesh because they are not, you are not the direct beneficiary of these
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commands. Today, we are going to examine verses 13 through 16, which is Marks 13 through 20.
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And what makes these marks, along with the ones that follow, so unique is that they are impossible to fulfill without the Holy Spirit.
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It's just, sure, you can be a moralist all day, but to do them with the heart and posture that is expected when Paul speaks can only happen with the Holy Spirit.
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Mark 14, or sorry, Mark 13 and 14, let's read them.
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it says, bless those who persecute you, bless and do not curse. So first, I want you to realize
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that this isn't a Pauline doctrine. This is Paul reiterating a Jesus doctrine from Luke 6, 27 to
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28. It says, but I say to you who hear, love your enemies, do good to those who hate you,
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Bless those who curse you. Pray for those who mistreat you.
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So second, this is a command not just to bless, but also to not curse.
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So it's twofold. You should bless those who persecute you, but also do not curse those who persecute you.
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Now, if you're unaware, there has been, for the past several months, a uniquely hostile debate among Reformed Christians on social media, specifically X.
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Rudeness, sarcasm, uncharitable interpretation, attacks on reputation, hostility toward one another,
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they have been kind of the thematic expressions for the past several months among brothers and sisters.
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And I believe this verse, along with several others, condemns many of these men along with
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many pastors. And I agree, there is a place for defending yourself in the face of lies or
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defending the truth in the face of lies. I think there is a place for poking the idols of the day.
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I believe that using clever words or memes or whatever you may use to defend the truth is
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a totally valid and useful strategy to fight for righteousness. But all of these things should aim
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and come from a place of humility and a desire for peace. That should be the ultimate desire
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for these things. And I believe many have failed to do this and have tarnished our witness to the
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world as a result. The infighting has been real bad. There's been several people that have been
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saying the phrase, no more brother wars. We know that Christ said things like sons of Satan to
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the Pharisees, or you are whitewashed tombs. David, he asked the Lord to break the teeth of God's
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enemies and that their children, the children of his enemies, would be fatherless. But these are
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statements that are, again, aimed at cultivating repentance and a call for justice, real biblical
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justice. Jesus, on the other hand, also prays for those who are murdering him,
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and he heals the ear of his captor, who is the servant of the high priest when
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Peter tries to lop it off. We know that Jesus saves the thief on the cross right after
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We know that David denied the opportunity to kill Saul when he had the chance
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and that he wept for his enemies who had just passed away.
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And so how do you square up this kind of intense rejection of evil
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with the command to love your enemies or bless those who persecute you
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Truth must be spoken to our opponents, but it has to be always delivered with the ultimate aim of holy justice and mercy.
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It has to have those two distinctives attached to it.
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To say or do things that are neither about holy justice, nor about mercy, nor about peace, nor include humility, is sinful.
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And that has been just rampant everywhere among people in the online community.
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And honestly, without the Holy Spirit, blessing your opponents cannot be done.
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no one can be justly looked on as a Christian who does not in some measure possess this spirit
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and practice this precept, end quote. So this work of balancing truth, justice, mercy, and peace can
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only be accomplished by someone that is filled with the Spirit of Christ. I really believe that
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is true. In our home, we often tell our children, do not return evil for evil. We say it all the
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time. You can return blessing for evil. You can return truth for evil. You could return
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a prayer of justice for evil, but you cannot return evil for evil.
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First Peter 3.9 says to Christians, and I believe is probably one of the most important passages
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for the church right now. It tells Christians to not return evil for evil or insult for insult,
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but give a blessing instead. That's 2 Peter, or 1 Peter 3.9. Not returning evil for evil or
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insult for insult, but giving a blessing instead. So, practically speaking,
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first it means don't go around bad-mouthing people that's a real easy way don't go around
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bad-mouthing people even if they are your enemies don't think even this is this is what makes it
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harder is because we know that jesus says that it's not just what you do it's also what you think
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don't even have evil thoughts about your enemies
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because you might not have the sin of your lips opening up but you might have the sin of the heart
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which is incredibly difficult and convicting because all of us struggle with this
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instead we need to desire God's favor on our enemies as he has had favor on us
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a few scriptures I'll disclose with on this point is Ephesians 4 29 let no corrupting talk come out
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your mouths, but only such as is good for building up as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to
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those who hear. Colossians 4.6, let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that
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you may know how you ought to answer each person. James 1.9, let each person be quick to hear, slow
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to speak, slow to anger. Proverbs 17, 27, whoever restrains his words has knowledge, and he who has
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a cool spirit is a man of understanding. And I'll close with Jesus's words on the matter. What he
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says in Matthew 12, 36, he says, I tell you, on the day of judgment, people will give an account
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for every careless word they speak, end quote. I'll tell you what, the internet is filled with
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careless words. It is a place where people think that they can behave in a way where they will not
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have to be accountable. But scripture makes it incredibly clear that Jesus says every single
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careless word that you make, every stupid response that you make, every dumb and prideful remark that
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you make, it will be accounted for and you will answer for it. And so all of us, let's have a
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spirit of humility. Let's have a spirit to bless those who persecute us or who call us names or
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who insult us. And let's know that Christ is holding us accountable for everything we say.
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Amen? Amen. Verse 15, this is Marks 15 and 16, it says, rejoice with those who rejoice and weep
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with those who weep. One of the great tragedies of individualism is indifference. Just being
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indifferent. It's a really sad reality when you start to dig down into the reality of what that
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means. It's easy to walk through life, never really uniting your affections and experiences
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with the affections and experiences of others. It's a sad time to see such individualism.
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Now, yeah, you might extend kind of a surface-level congratulations
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or maybe a surface-level condolences for the joys and tragedies of the day.
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But do you truly celebrate their joys and bear their burdens as if they were your own?
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Now, that's the key distinguishing factor that I believe Paul is getting at.
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And as you know, that type of care, that type of involvement requires time and emotional bandwidth.
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It demands that you live in a way that has some margin.
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You're not so incredibly taxed that you have no margin for those in your family and in your church.
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It's a call to have a posture to invite people in, to be around, to know people.
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It's very strange to weep with a stranger, and it's very strange to rejoice with a stranger.
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Honestly, it probably doesn't happen unless you witnessed a tragedy together.
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No, this is a call to rejoice and to weep with those people you know.
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And you can't know people if you don't have margin, if you don't seek people out.
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I want to talk about just how nefarious individualism really is.
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it leaves so many people single it leaves many people alone it breaks down families it breaks
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down churches it ultimately it breaks down cultures individualism is not a Christian ethic
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yesterday I shared a cartoon illustration depicting a woman she's sitting
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behind on the ground behind a door that's kind of cracked open and and out in the crack of the
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door, there's all these hands of men with roses and hands reaching out to this woman who's sitting
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at the door in the back and she's saying with a bubble over her head, I'm so lonely. And it
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highlights this reality of so many people today, especially women, maybe you're looking for kind
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of this fantasy man. Now men do this too. They're looking for this perfect woman that has no flaws.
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But that's what individualism does. It keeps you alone. It's not something that we should
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be proud of. Now, according to Scripture, we are born into family covenants.
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Your home, it's a family covenant. You're immediately brought into it without your
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permission. That family covenant, if it's Christian, is brought into a local church
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covenant. Here we stand with local churches or the local church that is filled with family
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covenants, but we are also in covenant with one another. And our local church is in covenant
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with other local churches. The body of Christ, you could even say as we join the CREC,
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the denominational covenant there. But there is interdependent covenants within covenants
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within covenants in the Christian life. The idea of individualism just doesn't fit
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with the Christian life. I want to remind you how powerful covenantal thinking and expression is
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to a lonely world. I just want to take one example with the Mormon church.
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Why do so many people get drawn to the Mormon church? It's not because of the gospel. Okay,
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we know that. It's because of what? Family. The covenant community that they have around family,
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around church, around community. They solve the lonely problem pretty well. That's what they do.
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Now, anyone can carry out the structure of covenant. It's something that is
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based to society, but only a born-again Christian filled with the Holy Spirit can carry out
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the true intention of covenant from gospel love. You can have a great group of people,
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people covenant around all types of things, but to truly express God's design for covenant
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takes the Holy Spirit. And this verse, rejoice with those who rejoice and weep with those who weep,
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is an expression of covenantal love. I've said it many times, there are over 100 one-anothers
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You just have to see this for a second. The Bible assumes
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Pray for one another that you may be healed. Confess your sins to one another.
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This idea that we are constantly one-anothering.
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Now, because the Bible assumes covenantal life, we know that this principle that we're talking
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about in this verse is to be strictly applied locally. Well, I'll say generally applied,
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but mostly applied locally. And here's what I mean by that. God isn't calling you to bear the joys
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and the sorrows of everything and of everybody. God is not calling you to break down in tears
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over every social media tragedy you hear online. God is not calling you to rejoice in every
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celebration that happens in every church across this nation. No, you are in covenant with your
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family, with this local church, and the direct application of this passage is here. It's here.
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It's why starting a family and being part of a church that limits the size of the church
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really matters. When we thought about Kingsway and we limited this church size to about 100 families
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from the beginning and that we would plant other churches, we know that it's extremely difficult
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to covenant with a thousand people. You can't really do it. In fact, if you're supposed to
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rejoice with those who rejoice and weep with those who weep, and you have a thousand people
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or two thousand people, it becomes almost an impossible command. In fact, you're not designed
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for it. You're designed for small community. A hundred families is actually a lot too,
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But the point I want to make is that I'm not saying to lack sympathy for those outside of the covenant.
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People in the world, people in other local churches, people that are not in your family.
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I'm not saying to lack sympathy outside of your covenants.
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I'm saying to guard your margin and prioritize your affections for those within your covenants.
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You know, as a pastor, I get to hear a lot of the sorrows of our flock.
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If I go around and lay all of the energy that I have by God's grace
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to deal with the tragedies that people write me in emails and online and social media
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and the miscarriage and the lost child and the divorce and the pornography addiction.
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If I allow myself to be spent spiritually and emotionally there,
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and then somebody from our flock or my own family comes and needs to be counseled,
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but I don't have anything left because I have misprioritized my affections for people not in
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my covenant. And so there is really a priority of natural affections. I have a priority and a
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responsibility to you in a way that I do not have a responsibility to someone online. It doesn't
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mean that I don't care. It doesn't mean that I might not send off a quick prayer for somebody,
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But it means that we are to care for one another uniquely here.
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What this also means is that you are to prioritize these people over people outside of the covenant.
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So imagine, I always have dinner with all these families that don't go to our church.
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You want some counsel or some discussion or some fellowship with me.
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But I'm constantly having dinners with people who don't go to our church and aren't in our family.
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And I'm so busy that I can't fit anybody else in that's here.
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No, you made a covenant to be in this community.
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You prioritize your family and you prioritize these people.
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It doesn't mean that you can't have someone over that isn't in your local church.
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What it means is prioritize these people because all of the commands of Scripture,
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including the one another's, call you to be responsible to those commands with those people.
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And if you're spent giving all of yourself to everybody else and you have nothing left for your own people,
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that's not good and that's what the internet does that's what
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this individualism does where we all kind of feel like hey you know what they're a christian
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i i love christians at other churches but you leave this church and while you may have five
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dinners with me a year while you're here you're probably going to get one every two years if you
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leave. Not because I don't like you, but truly because I have to prioritize these people.
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And that's the way we need to be thinking together. Hey, it's not that we don't want to
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be with you. It's that you're in a new covenant now, and you should be prioritizing those people
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in your covenant. We can't spread ourselves so thin that we don't have the ability to actually
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fulfill the substance of these commands. Amen? Verse 16 in Mark 17, it says, live in harmony
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with one another. I prefer the New King James translation of this verse that says,
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be of the same mind toward one another. This command is much of the reason we have
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strengthened and bolstered our membership process that you will hear about at the annual members
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meeting here at Kingsway. The few families that recently left over theological and ecclesiastical
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differences revealed that we had a degree of superficial unity. That's what it revealed to
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us as leaders. Again, unity doesn't mean uniformity, but I want to make a clarifying point.
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uniformity is the goal okay uniformity is the goal how do i know that because jesus says in
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his prayer when he prays for the church father i pray that they are one as we are one
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okay there's not just unity in this in the trinity there's uniformity in the trinity
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there's absolute beauty now i know some theologians are thinking wait uniformity
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Okay, don't get too deep on me here, all right?
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And for that reason, I think that we should be working toward oneness.
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the spiritual gifts that you guys bring. That's a great diversity. You know what I don't want
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is diversity in doctrine. Okay, diversity in doctrine is very dangerous. It splits churches
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all the time. Now, where those differences exist, which is the principle of the next passage we'll
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get through, our hearts ought to be focused on prayer and patience and peace, and we patiently
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debate one another as we get toward unity. Anybody that's married has probably done this
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with their spouse over the years. You start to become one. It's not that you become one when
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you get married. Yes, in a sense you do, but you are becoming one as the years and the decades go
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by. 1 Corinthians 1.10 says, Now I plead with you, brethren, by the name of our Lord Jesus Christ,
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that you all speak the same thing, and that there be no divisions among you,
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but that you be perfectly joined together in the same mind and in the same judgment.
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End quote. That sounds like uniformity to me. Again, yes, we're going to have differences,
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but the reality is the desire is to be complete oneness.
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Now, spiritual harmony begins with doctrine. It starts there. Sure, it begins with Christ,
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but let's just go past Christ for a second. It begins with doctrine. If you want to have
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unity in a local church, you need to have clarity of doctrine. I think the vast majority of churches
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in America. They have, you know, core values or some statement of faith that's the size of a
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paragraph. And they have all these people in their church and they think that they're unified, but
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they really have superficial unity. They don't have real unity. Real unity takes clarity. And
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when you have more clarity, you get more unity. And lack of clarity creates ambiguity. And so these
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churches, they have all these people who think they're unified. When in reality, if you talk
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to them about doctrine, radically different views on doctrine. And that's not good. It's,
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as soon as somebody starts taking a stand on a particular position, it eradicates a whole chunk
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of the church. I've seen this. I've seen a pastor all of a sudden get clear on doctrine.
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and he had kind of a pretty conservative church and then he became a calvinist came to the
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doctrines of grace started preaching that doctrine and about 40 percent of his church left
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he he didn't realize that there was superficial unity and that's even partially what happened
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here. We're a Presbyterian church. We are reformed in our doctrines. We have varying degrees of
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people that are learning and holding to those doctrines, which is fine. But we want to be clear
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that the goal is to get unified on the same confession and creeds and doctrine.
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now it begins a doctrine but i believe it's actually great for us to be unified and harmonious
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in other things and interests and values and activities politics and economics
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education mission vision hope not asking for uniformity in these things but i think it's
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great to work toward one-mindedness around these matters as i've mentioned before we have
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been fed this incredible lie that diversity is our greatest strength, right? This is the
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American lie of the last maybe 20 years. Diversity is our greatest strength. And again, as I said,
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yes, diversity in spiritual gifts, diversity in age. Oh, love that. I'm a big fan of
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multigenerational churches. Love the idea of having grandmothers in the faith and having
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mothers in the faith and daughters in the faith. Wonderful. Okay, that's a great example.
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But diversity in doctrine, diversity in mission, diversity in vision, diversity in the things that
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really matter, that's a great way to ruin a church. It's a great way to ruin a marriage.
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have different views on parenting as a as a married couple have different views on who god is
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as a married couple that doesn't work that ends almost always in divorce a breaking of covenant
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and it will here it will here if you have a different view on core values that you're not
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willing to be shaped by you're not patient and peaceful you're not willing to kind of debate
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prayerfully over long periods of time you'll leave that's what happens and this takes
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time when it says live in harmony with one another. Be of the same mind. Don't just conform
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immediately to the same mind. It's a work. Take time to be of the same mind. I want to give you
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another example. What is the unifying vision and mission for Prescott, Arizona?
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honestly I don't think anybody knows the answer to that question in fact I bet there are hundreds
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of conflicting visions and missions for this city that's a problem it doesn't make us stronger
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diversity doesn't make us stronger as a city it makes us weaker we need to know
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what does this city believe? What is the goal of this city? What is the purpose of this city?
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What are we trying to achieve? Because the liberals are trying to achieve something very
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different from us, and certain rulers and people in political office might be having
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completely different visions, even though they are our representatives, than us. And so
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So, if that's true of a city and true of a family, it's true of a church.
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Again, the principle, the general equity from this is to graciously debate one another.
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Which is why the apostle offers some qualifying language in that last part of this verse.
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Do not be haughty or high-minded, but associate with the lowly.
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It's like it forgets that it took you nine years to get to your positions
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and expects everybody else to get there in six months.
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Be patient with one another as they conform and they work and they study
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and the Holy Spirit reveals truths to them over time.
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don't be uh the mom who thinks that your way is the only way on parenting or on homeschooling
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or on cooking or whatever it is right don't be the man that's too advanced or too high or too
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mature or too credentialed to be taught anything by a younger or weaker brother. Don't be that guy.
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Be ready to adjust yourself based on the biblically based reasonings of others.
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I've been corrected by younger, less mature men by God's grace. Take it. It's a blessing
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when someone pulls you aside and says, hey, you know what? You said something stupid back there.
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did you know that? I didn't. Thank you for telling me. That's a wonderful blessing. You know what's
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really not great is someone who doesn't tell you that you've acted like an idiot, and you just keep
1.00
00:34:28.420
going on acting like an idiot. That's not a blessing. And so you just get to have a posture of humility
1.00
00:34:38.420
toward one another. In other words, be patient as we strive toward unity. Don't force conformity
00:34:46.680
on someone, but also don't be this stubborn non-conformist. Okay, yes, you know, if you have
00:34:54.360
a conviction on truth, you know, you think that we're violating first issues, you know, I'm talking
00:35:00.620
gospel, I'm talking trinity, I'm talking fundamentals of the faith, sure, be stubborn on those things.
00:35:08.100
But on secondary issues, on non-essentials, I always tell people I hold things with confidence,
00:35:15.380
not certainty. If it's a secondary, tertiary issue, I hold it with confidence. I have a position.
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I'm going to fight for that position. Here's why. I am not going to divide and create enemies
00:35:28.680
over something that has generally two or three camps. Okay, when you have guys like John MacArthur
00:35:37.080
and R.C. Sproul on two sides of an issue, both godly men, both incredibly fruitful ministries,
00:35:46.400
both incredibly wise, studying more about scripture than I'll ever probably know,
00:35:53.740
holding two radically different positions on multiple topics. You go, okay, I'm willing to
00:36:02.120
say, hey, maybe I'm not certain, but I'm confident. I think that's a great distinction to make. Don't
00:36:08.760
white-knuckle things. Fight for them. Have fun with them. But don't separate over stupid
00:36:18.260
disagreements on secondary or tertiary issues. Yeah, you might need to worship at another church
1.00
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because you might have a conviction of your heart, and I get that. Sometimes people do.
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But don't divide. Don't get hostile with one another. That's not right.
00:36:37.680
Now, God wants harmony and harmony among fallen men.
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It takes time. It takes prayer. It takes humility. It takes grace. It takes everything that is
00:36:49.820
impossible without the Holy Spirit. And so church relationships, when I see a church that's standing
00:36:54.800
for 20 years and it's got members in it that have been there for that long, that's a real mercy of
00:36:59.960
the Lord. Most people have no ability to stay somewhere longer than two, three years. If you
00:37:06.980
could stay five years, that's incredible. Ten years, that's incredible. Like just so rare to
00:37:14.280
be at the same church for ten years. And I get it. Some people have theological evolution. They
00:37:17.540
change and develop and it's not necessarily that they're like individualists. They actually just
00:37:21.920
had to change in theology. That's a fair option. But the truth is, if you've arrived
00:37:29.040
theologically, you've matured, staying at a church for a decade or more is a massive blessing to you,
00:37:39.100
to everybody else, as it models true commitment. It models something in a world of individualism
00:37:47.320
that is so incredibly rare because you know in 10 years i promise you'll be offended you'll be
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offended so much that you'll want to leave uh there will be multiple times in a 10-year period
00:38:00.080
where you will actually be on the threshold of the door
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but if you stay man that's so rare it's so rare and it's so good it's so good to do that
00:38:17.320
now i want to make a couple more points harmony for men usually starts intellectually and then
00:38:28.700
moves relationally men align with ideas first and relationship second women typically
00:38:37.340
harmonize with relationship first and then it leads to beliefs and what do you believe
00:38:44.880
and oh, me too, and it's just opposite that way. Now, I think the most effective way to produce
00:38:52.660
harmony, to really get there as a church, is two ways. It's pulpit and party, okay? Pulpit and party.
00:39:04.200
I think that's really the answer to unification, and here's what I mean by that. Spontaneous,
00:39:11.660
unprepared, passionate discussions aren't always helpful to create doctrinal unity.
00:39:21.740
Sometimes they work, sometimes they turn into bombs. The pulpit is a far better and more
00:39:28.380
effective way to create and shepherd the church toward doctrinal unity. Another great tool is
00:39:34.960
Bible studies. These are great conversational ways. Rely on those things to get people to
00:39:41.440
where they need to be. So, you know, another great one is books. A book gives you a reasonable amount
00:39:50.540
of space and time to actually shift a doctrine. You guys know it's been a year. I've never preached
00:39:59.620
on head coverings. Some people have read it. Some people have it. The book is a great tool to get
00:40:06.840
someone there but i'm not over here making everybody conform to head coverings and so it's a
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it's it's almost always a more effective way is the pulpit spending you know eight weeks
00:40:22.260
systematically going through first corinthians 11 then an unprepared passionate discussion about
00:40:27.440
head coverings and why you should wear one okay that that in my experience is just not as effective
00:40:33.580
The second one is party. Sunday morning worship isn't always the best way to do relationship.
00:40:40.160
In fact, most churches totally and utterly fail because they think that this is enough
00:40:45.820
and we leave and you guys all jump in your cars. I think we do party pretty well. We just had a
00:40:51.680
great party last week. And we also party every single Sunday after church. And that's required
00:41:02.520
And so you need the pulpit, the Bible study, the books,
00:41:19.600
Now, I want to talk just lastly as I close out here
00:41:28.700
And I want this last verse here, it says, never be wise in your own sight.
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And so, children, you are to honor your parents.
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and wives are to honor their husbands and husbands are to honor christ members are to honor pastors
00:42:09.820
young people are to honor the old people novices are to honor the experienced pastors are to honor
00:42:19.480
the presbytery. It just goes on and on and on about this order, and there are exceptions when
00:42:29.160
your kids teach you something, or your wife teaches you something, or a member teaches a
00:42:36.340
pastor something. Those happen. It's a real thing, but the general flow is the order that I just
00:42:42.940
talked about. Generally speaking, older teaches the younger, and the parent teaches the child,
00:42:48.760
And if the husband is truly leading theologically, shepherding, he's shepherding and instructing his wife.
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And the more experienced is generally teaching the less experienced.
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And it's prideful and not humble to think that you're young, you're new, you're fresh, you're a child, whatever it may be,
00:43:19.540
But the general rule is follow the order of the covenant, relationships, and I believe it's a safe place to be.
00:43:29.800
The church flows smoothly on the oil of humility.
00:43:38.000
One of the favorite quotes is from an old pastor friend of ours.
00:43:50.180
It's like your words fall flat right on the ground.
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Nothing sets a person so much out of the devil's reach as humility.
00:44:07.580
You want to keep this church healthy and thriving?
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and humility has to be our aim at king's way not not a humility that believes that we are less
00:44:19.400
or that we are nothing or that we know nothing we have convictions but a humility that presents
00:44:25.460
itself and its ideas with a posture of gentleness gentleness patience and prayer amen amen let's
00:44:37.340
pray. Father, we thank you, Lord, for the work that you're doing here, the clarifying, the purifying
00:44:48.100
of our church. Lord, we ask that you would bless us with a posture of humility. Lord, that you would
00:44:56.460
make us harmonious and of one mind, that you would work your spirit through all of us, that we would