Dale Partridge - May 23, 2024


The Covenant Home Part 5： Parenting with a Covenantal Mindset with Dale Partridge


Episode Stats


Length

51 minutes

Words per minute

127.872185

Word count

6,539

Sentence count

388

Harmful content

Toxicity

5

sentences flagged

Hate speech

71

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode, we continue our series on the covenant home by exploring the roles of parents and children in the Christian family. What are the roles and responsibilities of a Christian father and wife in the covenant? What role do they play in raising their children? Is their child in the Covenant or not?

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:01.000 Amen.
00:00:02.000 Well, what a blessing it is to continue this series on the Covenant Home.
00:00:10.780 Parenting is hard because ignorance is easy.
00:00:16.240 Parenting is hard because ignorance is easy.
00:00:20.400 The tragedy of the modern church is its failure in multi-generational faithfulness.
00:00:28.060 That's the problem that we have seen today.
00:00:30.860 Fathers have failed in raising their children in the worldview of Christ. 0.98
00:00:39.280 And to think that the result of so many apostate children is not attached to how we view children 0.99
00:00:50.600 would be foolish. 1.00
00:00:54.660 and our culture and country has bewitched the family. 0.99
00:01:00.200 It has made covenant parents break covenant with their own children.
00:01:07.860 It's shifted us to think of our children in a way that is not biblical.
00:01:15.520 Now, over the past few weeks, we've talked a lot about covenant, beginning with the covenant
00:01:19.880 of works and Adam, moving into the covenant of grace under Christ.
00:01:23.740 We've discussed the structure of covenants, what they are, how each covenant has a head
00:01:27.840 and a representative that is responsible for procuring covenant blessings or curses to
00:01:37.100 those they represent.
00:01:38.340 We've talked about all these in part one, two, three, and four.
00:01:41.960 Adam was the first representative of humanity.
00:01:45.360 We learned this. 0.72
00:01:46.680 He failed to keep God's commands and brought covenant curses upon all he represented.
00:01:51.760 and that covenant curse was death. 0.74
00:01:56.540 In contrast, we saw that Christ is the second Adam
00:01:59.520 and he is the representative of a new humanity 0.82
00:02:02.620 and he keeps God's commands perfectly
00:02:06.980 and secures covenant blessings,
00:02:08.980 which is eternal life for all he represents.
00:02:13.540 We also learned that husbands are the heads of their wives,
00:02:17.960 that they are the covenant head and representative
00:02:21.080 who are responsible for the state of their own homes.
00:02:25.080 We learned that husbands like Christ
00:02:28.040 are not guilty of the sins of their wife,
00:02:32.020 but they take responsibility
00:02:33.800 for the sins of their wife and children
00:02:37.100 in the same way that Christ took responsibility
00:02:40.120 for the sins of the church.
00:02:43.860 He was not guilty of them,
00:02:45.180 but he took responsibility for them,
00:02:46.800 paying for them on the cross.
00:02:48.100 we are to operate as heads and representatives who are responsible in the same way that Christ
00:02:55.240 operated as a head and is responsible for the state of his bride. Lastly we looked at marriage
00:03:04.000 we looked at the covenantal duties of wives the covenantal duties of husbands today we are going
00:03:08.820 to explore the covenantal duties of parents. Now today's message is going to be more theological
00:03:17.400 than I would like. My role as a pastor is to take heavy theological concepts and make them as
00:03:27.300 simple and comprehensible as possible. And this topic is just difficult. And so we're going to
00:03:36.420 put our academic heads on for a bit. Bear with me as we get through this. It might feel a little
00:03:44.260 bit like a lecture and less like a sermon. But the content here is what is required
00:03:51.400 for us to view our children according to scripture. So I broke it up into four or five
00:04:00.420 sections. Covenant inclusion, covenant apprehension, covenant presumption and versus covenant assurance,
00:04:08.020 covenant blessings by birth. I know those are big words and we're going to learn what they are
00:04:12.460 as we get through this. I think, I think the church struggles from biblical amateurism
00:04:19.060 because we have such a low capacity to think, you know, to love the Lord your God with all
00:04:26.740 your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind. People forget that. And so we're going
00:04:30.600 to use our brains to exercise our mind and have a little bit of a theological
00:04:34.580 focus in today's message. Covenant inclusion. The big question is, if you're a Christian
00:04:44.340 who has received the covenant sign of baptism, there's two covenant, or there's two sacraments
00:04:51.120 of the New Testament. Baptism is covenant entrance. The Lord's Supper is covenant maintenance,
00:04:57.880 Right. So you've received the sign of baptism. You're in the covenant. You have young children. Are your children in the covenant or not? This is a very big question. Are the children in your family in the covenant or not? 0.64
00:05:18.140 now when you go as a father to Spain and you become a citizen of Spain
00:05:23.680 your children are nationalized with you imagine being a citizen of Spain but your children
00:05:31.740 are not citizens no even secular institutions understand covenantal thinking when dad becomes
00:05:41.320 a citizen the children are nationalized with him first Corinthians 7 14 says for the unbelieving
00:05:46.720 husband is made holy because of his wife because of the believing wife and the 0.89
00:05:53.380 unbelieving wife is made holy because of her believing husband otherwise your 0.99
00:05:58.340 children would be unclean but as it is they are holy the children of believers 0.95
00:06:05.620 are holy now let's just think about that for a second if you're a Jew first
00:06:10.960 century Jew and you hear the term holy how are you defining that well certainly
00:06:15.460 set apart, certainly as a covenant member. There's no other way to think about that in
00:06:21.840 first century Christianity. Holy means set apart, not of the world, but inside the covenant.
00:06:30.480 In the Old Testament, the entire family was included in the covenant.
00:06:34.560 I think it is still, but it's certainly there was no argument then when a pagan father came
00:06:40.520 to see Yahweh as God, and he's a proselyte that came essentially to join the Israelite
00:06:46.280 people, he was set apart from the world by receiving circumcision. 0.60
00:06:51.820 Reformed Baptists, Presbyterians all agree that circumcision has been replaced by baptism
00:06:55.540 as the sign of covenant entrance.
00:06:58.280 Now, according to the doctrine of covenant representation, his entire household was made
00:07:03.560 holy through him being made holy.
00:07:06.060 Now, they're not being made holy in the sense where they are saved.
00:07:09.380 They're not redeemed wholly.
00:07:12.340 We've got to create two categories for that.
00:07:15.200 You can be set apart without being saved.
00:07:19.420 You could be in the covenant while not being actually redeemed yet.
00:07:24.420 This is the language of the scriptures.
00:07:25.720 The American idea that we are all individuals, where a father and maybe a daughter are in
00:07:32.620 the covenant, while mom and the two other sons are outside of the covenant, is completely
00:07:37.780 foreign to scripture. You will not find that concept in the Old or New Testament. Throughout
00:07:45.340 the Bible, we see Joshua's mindset on the matter. As for me and my house, we will serve
00:07:51.400 the Lord. He declares where his family will be because he represents his family. Genesis
00:08:00.820 17, 27, we see Abraham's faith and representation import his entire household into the covenant. 0.81
00:08:09.400 It says, and all the men of his house, those born in his house and those bought with money
00:08:16.240 from a foreigner were circumcised with him, end quote. Did all those men have faith like Abraham? 0.70
00:08:23.940 Did all those babies have faith in Abraham, as Abraham had?
00:08:29.440 Certainly not.
00:08:30.700 Certainly not.
00:08:31.960 Abraham was very wealthy and had many servants, many people in his household.
00:08:35.440 Yet they were in the covenant because their representative was in the covenant.
00:08:39.700 This is the way that the Old Testament operates.
00:08:43.920 Now, returning to 1 Corinthians 7.14, when one spouse is in the covenant, 0.79
00:08:49.740 The oneness of marriage means the unbelieving spouse is also in the covenant. 0.95
00:08:57.460 You can't be one with your wife, you be in the covenant and her out. 0.99
00:09:01.240 No, she's in the covenant through marriage. 0.92
00:09:04.300 She's one with you if you're a believing husband and an unbelieving wife.
00:09:08.020 Stop thinking individually. 0.96
00:09:10.060 Think like a Christian.
00:09:11.560 Think covenantally. 1.00
00:09:16.260 They're not redeemed.
00:09:18.740 Later, it says that possibly, how do you not know that maybe the believing husband might
00:09:25.400 sanctify or evangelize in a sense, his wife?
00:09:31.260 We don't know.
00:09:32.260 We don't know if we might save our spouse through our own relationship with the Lord. 1.00
00:09:40.680 But what this means is that that unbelieving party who's in the covenant, but is not actually 0.98
00:09:45.960 saved. They're under the influence, the blessing, the spiritual proximity of God's truth. And when
00:09:52.600 scripture speaks of someone falling away, it does not mean that they are falling away from the faith.
00:09:57.440 Jesus says that all that the father gives to him will come and he will not lose any of you.
00:10:03.800 You won't lose any of you. My sheep know me. I give them eternal life and they will never perish
00:10:11.440 is what he says.
00:10:15.000 And so, it doesn't mean they're falling away from the faith.
00:10:17.880 So what are they falling away from?
00:10:19.380 What are the apostate passages in the scripture about?
00:10:23.860 What are they falling away from?
00:10:26.300 No, they're falling away from the covenant.
00:10:30.560 There are people in both the visible and the invisible church.
00:10:36.780 Some are in the covenant by baptism alone,
00:10:38.980 while others are in the covenant by both baptism and faith.
00:10:43.440 This is basic understanding of Old Testament,
00:10:47.820 New Testament, covenant theology.
00:10:51.220 You had people in the Old Testament that were in the covenant,
00:10:54.680 but you were not yet redeemed.
00:10:56.980 This is why Jesus gave the parable of the wheat and the tares.
00:11:03.560 Matthew 13, 28 through 30.
00:11:06.380 After the crop owner learns that there are tares among his wheat,
00:11:10.940 the servants ask, quote,
00:11:13.340 Do you want us to then go out and gather them up?
00:11:16.120 He said, No.
00:11:18.100 Lest you gather up the tares and you also uproot the wheat with them.
00:11:22.500 Let them both grow up until the harvest.
00:11:25.920 And at that time of the harvest, I will say to the reapers,
00:11:29.320 first gather the tares and bind them in bundles and burn them.
00:11:33.000 but gather the wheat into my barn, end quote.
00:11:37.560 In other words, at this time in our current generation,
00:11:42.520 God expects his covenant people to be a mixed group.
00:11:46.320 We're a mixed group.
00:11:48.620 We've always been a mixed group, by the way.
00:11:51.280 The Old Testament's a mixed group.
00:11:52.820 The New Testament's a mixed group, 1.00
00:11:54.880 which God will separate at the end of time. 0.99
00:11:59.020 Paul says in Romans 9, 6,
00:12:00.500 for not all who are descended from Israel belong to Israel
00:12:04.040 and not all are children of Abraham. 0.59
00:12:08.660 That's a shocking message to a group of Jews 0.76
00:12:13.580 who think that circumcision saves. 0.99
00:12:18.080 No, they're in the covenant,
00:12:19.660 but they're not in a sense of the covenant.
00:12:24.880 Until Christ returns, the covenant community
00:12:27.540 is in a state of impurity. 1.00
00:12:30.360 It needs to continue to be washed.
00:12:32.600 It needs to continue to be united.
00:12:34.580 It needs to continue to be purified.
00:12:37.080 Yes, there is an invisible church that is completely pure,
00:12:39.680 that is completely redeemed within the visible church.
00:12:43.080 We can see that.
00:12:44.860 36% of the world's populations claims Christ.
00:12:49.020 Are all of those people redeemed?
00:12:51.360 Certainly not.
00:12:52.000 The visible church is big.
00:12:53.940 The invisible church is smaller.
00:12:56.340 We understand these concepts.
00:12:59.600 But at the return of Christ and forevermore, the covenant will be completely purified.
00:13:06.300 You can read about that in Jeremiah chapter 31.
00:13:09.720 So to answer the original question, are your children in the covenant? 0.83
00:13:15.340 I cannot imagine any first century Jew or even a first century Roman ever saying no to that. 0.68
00:13:22.380 In a patriarchal society, unfortunately, we are no longer a patriarchal society. 0.89
00:13:31.340 I think biblical patriarchy is what you see in scripture.
00:13:34.160 There is a form of unbiblical patriarchy that we need to reject as Christians, but there
00:13:39.600 is also a form of biblical patriarchy.
00:13:42.240 Christ is an incredible biblical patriarch.
00:13:46.520 but in a roman culture and a patriarchal society the family was an appendage to the identity and
00:13:58.040 status of the father go read any history book and try to find children that have
00:14:04.280 separate identities from their father you will not find it it does not exist
00:14:10.280 When we look to Ephesians chapter 6, 1 through 3, we see Paul addressing children as covenant
00:14:20.040 children.
00:14:21.480 This is a Roman city that is speaking to Gentile believers, and he says, children, obey your
00:14:35.680 parents in the Lord.
00:14:40.280 i just imagine that this letter is written to the churches and this letter is read aloud and there's
00:14:45.000 six-year-olds in the room and four-year-olds in the room and eight-year-olds in the room and two
00:14:48.840 year olds in the room and children from the apostle paul obey your parents where in the lord
00:14:57.160 for this is right it goes on to say honor your father and mother this is the first commandment
00:15:03.080 with a promise that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land.
00:15:11.480 So first, Paul assumes that children are to behave as if they are in the covenant with
00:15:18.300 God.
00:15:19.280 They're in the covenant people.
00:15:22.100 The reason for their obedience is that it may go well with you and you may live long
00:15:29.760 in the land.
00:15:30.280 If you know your Old Testament, you know what he's talking about.
00:15:32.600 What land?
00:15:33.600 The promised land. 1.00
00:15:35.400 He's talking to a Gentile New Testament child, almost as if he's part of the same group of 1.00
00:15:43.980 people that was promised covenantally the land of promise. 0.87
00:15:50.780 He's using covenantal language with New Testament Roman Christians.
00:15:56.860 Very interesting.
00:15:57.840 So either Paul forgot that we're now here in the New Testament, we're all individuals now.
00:16:04.600 Either Paul forgot, or he continues to view children as God's people always have, as in the covenant.
00:16:13.700 That's how he views them.
00:16:17.060 Paul is Jewish through and through.
00:16:21.680 And he communicates that in his New Testament language.
00:16:25.900 Because your children are in the covenant, this should shape how you relate to them.
00:16:32.600 Unfortunately, many Christian families influenced by individualism view their children as lost pagans
00:16:39.280 needing to be evangelized rather than covenant members who need to be nurtured.
00:16:46.680 It is a subtle and important distinction that we need to talk about. 0.62
00:16:52.840 Again, no faithful, redeemed Jewish person of the Old Testament 0.94
00:16:58.160 would have tried to intellectually persuade or evangelize their child 0.99
00:17:03.900 to become one of God's people.
00:17:06.480 That's a crazy thought.
00:17:08.580 No, no, no.
00:17:10.420 They're not trying to convince their kid that they're in the covenant.
00:17:13.000 They're in the covenant.
00:17:14.240 That's their identity.
00:17:15.420 That's who they are.
00:17:17.320 They're not an outsider.
00:17:18.560 Later, they already viewed their child's identity by birth.
00:17:25.280 God gave that child to them.
00:17:28.040 It's an appendage to the Father.
00:17:31.620 He is the representation, wherever He is, they are.
00:17:37.740 So their approach was not evangelism, but covenant nurture.
00:17:44.680 nurture. In
00:17:47.020 nurturing their child in the ways and the
00:17:48.880 truths of the Lord,
00:17:50.540 covenantally minded
00:17:52.280 Christians,
00:17:54.740 parents, trust that the
00:17:56.900 Lord will handle the
00:17:58.740 transformation of the heart.
00:18:02.040 It doesn't mean that
00:18:02.840 we don't preach the gospel to our kids, we do.
00:18:05.560 But the posture
00:18:06.640 toward them is not, they're on the outside
00:18:08.960 and we
00:18:10.960 hope one day they'll come in.
00:18:14.680 It's not, you're lost and on the outside and all of a sudden they say,
00:18:22.040 I want to believe in Jesus and I want to get baptized.
00:18:24.960 And you say, let's wait.
00:18:28.040 Eh, prove it.
00:18:33.840 We lay stumbling blocks in front of our own kids' faith when we do that.
00:18:38.680 I don't need 23-year-old faith from a six-year-old.
00:18:41.580 I need six-year-old faith from a six-year-old.
00:18:47.820 I want to talk about covenant apprehension.
00:18:54.640 Why is all this important?
00:18:58.520 Because Christian parents around the world worry that their children won't come to faith.
00:19:05.380 They won't come to faith.
00:19:07.600 You have older kids, you remember the years where you sat and labored in prayer.
00:19:13.620 Oh, Lord, transform the heart.
00:19:18.240 But fear, fear, I'm not talking about faithfulness.
00:19:23.200 I'm talking about fear stems from either being ignorant of
00:19:27.360 or not trusting in the covenant promises of God to parents, to parents.
00:19:34.440 Deuteronomy 7, 9, God says to his covenant people,
00:19:36.820 quote know therefore that the Lord your God is God
00:19:41.580 the faithful God who keeps covenant
00:19:44.800 and steadfast love with those who love him
00:19:49.020 and keep his commandments to a thousand
00:19:52.520 generations
00:19:53.640 okay this is a promise of what's called
00:20:00.760 covenant succession covenant succession
00:20:04.840 It is the exact problem I opened up with. 0.99
00:20:08.400 Multi-generational faithfulness is lacking. 1.00
00:20:12.060 We are failing at covenant succession. 0.99
00:20:18.520 Now, when the term thousand is used here,
00:20:20.900 this is just a little side note, it's kind of fun.
00:20:23.800 When the term thousand is used in scripture,
00:20:26.680 it either means 1,000, exactly.
00:20:30.760 It could be a symbolic term for innumerable.
00:20:34.840 But it never, ever means less than 1,000.
00:20:41.420 Ever.
00:20:45.160 Humanity has only experienced about 260 generations since Adam.
00:20:53.080 So according to the promise, God's faithfulness extends far beyond our current era.
00:20:58.300 This idea that Jesus is coming back on Thursday needs to stop.
00:21:04.840 No, God is going to fulfill the great commission through the church
00:21:07.700 over the next many centuries.
00:21:12.060 Christ will continue to conquer his enemies through conversion.
00:21:18.700 And God's faithfulness is going to go through many, many more generations.
00:21:24.900 His covenant love and promise will endure.
00:21:29.100 Isaiah 59, 20 through 21 says,
00:21:32.120 and a redeemer will come to Zion, to those in Jacob who will turn from transgression, declares
00:21:37.900 the Lord. And as for me, this is my covenant with them, he says the Lord. My spirit that is upon you
00:21:43.840 and my words that I have put in your mouth shall not depart out of your mouth or out of the mouth
00:21:48.860 of your offspring or out of the mouth of your children's offspring, says the Lord from this
00:21:54.240 time forth and forevermore. What do you do with that? What do you do with that? Well, most Americans
00:22:01.200 go, well, that's just to the Old Testament Israel.
00:22:04.140 That's what most Americans do.
00:22:06.540 I'm going to talk about that in a second.
00:22:10.040 The term Jacob is a term for Israel.
00:22:15.180 No one argues that point.
00:22:19.360 And the true Israel are all the descendants of Abraham by faith. 0.87
00:22:25.920 Who are the true children of Abraham?
00:22:27.840 They are those who are born again by faith.
00:22:34.900 Galatians 3.7 says,
00:22:36.440 Know then that it is those of faith who are the sons of Abraham.
00:22:43.380 There it is.
00:22:44.820 Right there.
00:22:47.520 America's dispensationalism.
00:22:51.280 It's the view that essentially there's two covenant people of God.
00:22:54.320 There's the Old Testament Israel and there's the church. 0.83
00:22:56.500 They're separate.
00:22:57.840 it has prevented us from understanding the Bible's covenantalism.
00:23:03.220 Okay, there are not two peoples of God.
00:23:06.280 I could do a whole sermon on this, but I won't.
00:23:09.100 There is one covenant of people of God that began with Israel
00:23:12.740 and expanded in Christ to every tribe, nation, and tongue.
00:23:17.840 Okay, the church started in its seed format and has expanded.
00:23:21.880 This is important because it helps us see how the promises of the Old Testament apply to us, the church, the true Israel.
00:23:34.320 The church is the bride of Christ, the true Israel.
00:23:40.860 This is what every Christian believed until about the year 1840. 0.83
00:23:49.160 Go read any Puritan literature and try to find the division of two peoples of God.
00:24:00.640 The promise of blessings to a thousand generations and to our offspring's offspring forevermore,
00:24:08.240 those promises are to all who keep the covenant by faith.
00:24:13.400 Those promises are actually our promises.
00:24:15.120 Yes, were there promises to Israel that have been fulfilled in the Old Testament?
00:24:19.780 Certainly.
00:24:20.480 Is there promises to Israel that have been fulfilled in Christ?
00:24:23.540 Certainly.
00:24:24.480 Is there promises that have been given to Israel in the Old Testament that are still
00:24:30.720 being fulfilled in Christ and in the church?
00:24:34.120 Certainly.
00:24:36.000 You get to learn that the Bible is one whole story, not two different stories.
00:24:45.120 and that the people of the Old Testament,
00:24:48.100 you know how they were saved?
00:24:49.600 By grace through faith in Christ, the Christ to come.
00:24:53.700 Do you know how the New Testament saints were saved?
00:24:56.400 By grace through faith in Christ who came.
00:25:01.500 We're looking at the cross in different directions,
00:25:04.420 but we're all saved the same way.
00:25:07.880 The Old Testament saints were not saved
00:25:09.520 by forgiveness of animals. 0.77
00:25:11.400 Hebrews dispels that. 0.97
00:25:13.180 You aren't getting the forgiveness of sins
00:25:14.480 through the slaughtering of animals, that was pointing people to and preparing people
00:25:20.260 for Christ, who was to be slaughtered, the perfect, spotless lamb.
00:25:28.660 Acts 2.39, we see Peter continue this multi-generational and covenantal framework when he speaks 0.56
00:25:35.380 to both Jews and Gentiles saying, repent and be baptized, every one of you.
00:25:41.660 just think about that for a second 0.73
00:25:45.320 every one of you
00:25:46.720 except the kids
00:25:47.820 right that would be very strange
00:25:51.200 it says in the name of
00:25:53.360 Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of sins and you will
00:25:55.240 receive the gift of the Holy Spirit for the promise
00:25:57.580 is for you and your children
00:25:59.280 he says
00:26:03.340 he continues he says
00:26:04.780 and everyone whom the Lord our God
00:26:07.160 calls to himself
00:26:08.140 so
00:26:10.100 So, in this verse, the substance of the promise, the promise is for you and your children.
00:26:17.220 Well, what's the promise?
00:26:19.340 Well, the promise in this text is the receiving of the Holy Spirit.
00:26:24.100 That's what he said will just happen.
00:26:27.220 That promise is for all who keep covenant by faith and for their children who keep covenant
00:26:35.220 by faith and for their children who keep covenant by faith.
00:26:41.000 Now, when we rely on our parental efforts for the conversion of our children,
00:26:46.900 I mean, any parent has probably found themselves doing something like this.
00:26:53.340 We try to convince our kids into the kingdom, right?
00:27:00.640 When our efforts rely on our works, fear is the natural response.
00:27:08.700 you start to worry about your own child's salvation.
00:27:15.200 Because we're smart Christians, right?
00:27:16.720 We know that Paul says,
00:27:18.460 I plant and Apollos waters,
00:27:20.540 but God brings the increase.
00:27:23.220 All I can do is plant and all I can do is water.
00:27:26.260 I can't change the heart of that kid. 0.92
00:27:30.440 We can't produce conversion in our children.
00:27:35.140 But when we keep covenant by faith,
00:27:37.420 When we keep covenant by faith, when we stand on God's promises by faith, there's no reason for fear because we have a promise-keeping God.
00:27:54.780 This is the crux of this entire sermon, so pay attention here.
00:27:59.400 Doug Wilson once said, God's promises are the foundation upon which we build our duties.
00:28:07.420 God's promises are the foundation upon which we build our duties.
00:28:14.640 Our works stand on the foundation of faith in the promises. 0.94
00:28:21.080 In other words, Christian parents do not work for the promise.
00:28:27.220 They must work from the promise.
00:28:31.160 I want you to really just let that sit on your brain for a minute.
00:28:34.380 Christian parents do not work for the promise you don't work for it you can't 0.94
00:28:39.900 earn it the promise has been given you have the promise it's already yours you 0.92
00:28:46.920 must work from the promise from it as a parent you do not receive the promise
00:28:54.780 of a faithful child through your works that's not how you get a faithful child
00:28:59.820 through your works instead your works your faithfulness your duties are a
00:29:07.440 response to God's promise to bless his covenant keeping parents with faithful
00:29:14.760 children it's a shift in mindset these are subtle distinctions but they're very
00:29:20.760 important in other words your efforts in raising your child are an expression of
00:29:26.280 trust in the promise. If I had no promise, my efforts, I would
00:29:35.660 have no trust in them. I would be toiling and striving. I hope
00:29:40.460 that everything I do will make them a moral person. No, your
00:29:46.040 efforts in raising your child are an expression of trust in
00:29:49.460 God's promises, not a means to earn God's promise. You already
00:29:54.280 have God's promise. This is good news. It's similar to our relationship with obedience.
00:30:02.540 We do not obey to earn a righteous verdict. Rather, we are grateful for the righteous
00:30:08.260 verdict that has been earned by Christ on our behalf and imputed to us by faith. It's
00:30:13.520 a shift. One of them, if you get it wrong, you'll be a legalist. The other one, you'll
00:30:18.620 get it right and you'll love grace. But it's small and it's subtle. And if you get it wrong,
00:30:23.920 your life will constantly lean on your works for salvation.
00:30:28.460 You'll never rest in Christ.
00:30:30.680 And the same is true with this distinction.
00:30:32.420 If you don't rest in the promise and work from the promise,
00:30:38.060 you'll always wonder if your works are enough.
00:30:41.680 And they're not.
00:30:47.180 Are you resting in the promise?
00:30:54.580 Parents need to evaluate the motive of their parenting.
00:30:58.360 The motive of your parenting.
00:31:01.000 Are you standing on the promises of God or are you toiling and striving to earn the substance of that promise?
00:31:10.160 Are you resting in God's faithfulness to bless your children or are you relying on your own efforts and feeling anxious about the outcome?
00:31:16.460 the truth is we've never been in control of our spiritual of our child's spiritual outcomes
00:31:26.020 it's one of the most difficult truths as a parent
00:31:31.640 we are simply called to trust in God's promises and be faithful in all aspects of our daily lives
00:31:41.220 When we trust the Lord for the results, it frees us to just obey, to be faithful.
00:31:50.240 When we have faith in God's promises and nurture them in the Lord,
00:31:55.700 and they have faith in God's promises and nurture their children in the Lord,
00:32:01.080 we trust that God's going to fulfill the promise of blessing our generations with God-loving descendants.
00:32:07.000 You want to know the answer to having children and grandchildren
00:32:11.680 and great-grandchildren that all follow the Lord?
00:32:15.320 Trust in the promise and work from that promise.
00:32:20.220 Be so grateful that the Lord promises to extend his love to a thousand generations,
00:32:28.220 to bless you and the church, and be faithful.
00:32:33.040 work from gratitude, not from duty
00:32:37.040 work from rest, not from toil
00:32:41.120 this
00:32:44.400 understanding leads us to a concept
00:32:48.280 that I have called expectant redemption
00:32:51.500 I did a podcast with Joel Webin
00:32:55.660 last year on this topic that many parents were encouraged by
00:33:01.300 And I think it's something the church needs to have more discussion around.
00:33:08.980 I want to talk about the ordinary means of covenant blessing.
00:33:13.080 As Christian parents, we can confidently expect the redemption of our children
00:33:18.280 because God has entrusted them to us.
00:33:24.560 To us.
00:33:25.600 unfortunately
00:33:28.600 we often think
00:33:30.280 of the doctrine of unconditional
00:33:32.540 election as if
00:33:34.860 it's the doctrine of arbitrary election
00:33:36.960 okay we often think
00:33:40.440 like first generation
00:33:43.000 Christians 1.00
00:33:43.540 that every 1.00
00:33:46.900 person is kind of plucked out
00:33:49.020 of the world and grafted
00:33:50.940 into the church we think that
00:33:52.840 that's like the ordinary way that God
00:33:54.860 saves. That's the extraordinary way that God saves. You want to know the ordinary way that
00:33:59.920 God saves is giving your children boring testimonies. Okay. It's not this, oh man,
00:34:07.080 my child, man, he, you know, he was a drug dealer and, and then, uh, you know, then he fell into
00:34:13.200 prostitution and, and then he was in jail and then the Lord saved him. No, that's extraordinary.
00:34:20.920 You know what's ordinary?
00:34:22.460 Is parents raising their children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.
00:34:25.800 They don't even remember when they came to faith.
00:34:28.400 They were growing up as a covenant child.
00:34:32.080 They've always believed and trusted in Christ.
00:34:34.680 They've always prayed.
00:34:35.660 They've always read the Bible.
00:34:36.860 That's been their identity.
00:34:41.300 The ordinary flow is not new graphs.
00:34:44.920 The ordinary flow is the branches that come off those graphs.
00:34:48.100 I'm a first generation Christian.
00:34:49.920 I don't expect my children to follow the pattern that I did
00:34:54.820 I expect my children to grow off the shoot
00:34:57.400 That I was grafted in
00:34:59.280 And I expect my grandchildren to come off the shoot
00:35:02.320 Of their faithfulness
00:35:03.940 That's ordinary
00:35:06.340 The ordinary means of salvation
00:35:08.500 Comes through the family
00:35:10.240 Comes through faithfulness
00:35:12.240 Don't expect your kids to have to have this
00:35:15.540 Rebellion phase
00:35:17.080 and radical, extraordinary testimony.
00:35:22.400 I've seen churches that bring in mafia members
00:35:27.680 and ex-porn stars and they put them in front of the church
00:35:30.660 and they go, wow, what an incredible testimony.
00:35:34.620 And all the kids are in the room going,
00:35:35.720 I wish I had a testimony like that.
00:35:38.560 No, no, you don't.
00:35:40.600 That is not the testimony that you want.
00:35:43.280 That's the extraordinary way of salvation.
00:35:46.060 You want a boring testimony. 0.98
00:35:48.640 And you're just as wicked as either of those people. 0.90
00:35:54.040 But God, by his grace, saved you early.
00:35:58.180 Early.
00:36:02.920 So it's not arbitrary election.
00:36:06.040 God doesn't randomly save people.
00:36:07.760 And I want to explain this.
00:36:09.140 Two examples.
00:36:10.560 Two families. 0.66
00:36:11.300 You have one family with Christian parents and the other with an atheist father and a Hindu mother.
00:36:16.840 Okay?
00:36:17.740 Should both sets of parents have the same expectation that Jesus Christ is going to redeem them?
00:36:23.020 Should they have the same expectation? 0.93
00:36:26.340 My children and then the atheist with the Hindu mom. 0.90
00:36:31.720 Should we have the same expectation for the children in those homes to come to Christ? 0.94
00:36:36.820 No.
00:36:37.780 That would be absurd.
00:36:38.920 the second family 1.00
00:36:41.740 the Hindu family 1.00
00:36:42.880 lacks the means 1.00
00:36:45.580 of redemption
00:36:46.740 there are no means there
00:36:48.720 they do not have faith
00:36:51.500 they do not have the promise
00:36:52.560 they do not have the gospel
00:36:54.160 they do not have the word of God
00:36:55.460 they do not have prayer
00:36:56.560 they do not have the sacraments
00:36:58.200 that all contribute in some varying degree
00:37:00.320 to redemption
00:37:02.940 when you don't have the means
00:37:06.360 you shouldn't expect the ends
00:37:07.560 this makes sense right 1.00
00:37:08.580 can God break in and save the Hindu child? Certainly. But the normative, ordinary means 1.00
00:37:18.660 of redemption is that you have to have the means to get the ends because God ordains not just the
00:37:27.000 ends, but God ordains the means. This should produce comfort in Christian parents. The presence
00:37:34.740 of the means gives you no reason to doubt the salvation of your own children.
00:37:39.080 In fact, you have every reason to confidently trust that God is going to bless your children
00:37:43.460 with redemption.
00:37:44.500 He gave them to you, the parent who is faithful, who preaches the gospel to them, who reads
00:37:53.180 the word of God, who gives them the worldview of Christ, who prays for them.
00:37:58.140 They have all the means.
00:37:59.820 You have no reason to doubt the ends.
00:38:01.900 you have every reason to trust
00:38:05.020 in fact that God expects
00:38:07.260 or that you should expect your salvation
00:38:09.580 of your own children
00:38:10.420 what a blessing
00:38:11.440 now you're not relying on whose efforts
00:38:15.020 you're not relying on your efforts
00:38:16.080 you're relying on the providential
00:38:19.160 grace
00:38:20.320 and mercy of the Lord by faith
00:38:23.240 covenant presumption
00:38:26.920 verse covenant assurance
00:38:27.940 we've talked about covenant inclusion apprehension expected redemption I want
00:38:37.840 to talk about another distinction between covenant presumption and covenant
00:38:42.940 assurance presumption is a fruit of pride presumption is a fruit of pride
00:38:49.060 when you presume the Lord will save your children simply because of covenant
00:38:56.860 status, or that they were baptized, or our works, we rely on God to accomplish redemption
00:39:04.000 without the ordinary means of covenant faithfulness.
00:39:11.280 Scripture often highlights the Israelites' covenant presumption.
00:39:16.120 They presumed hard on covenant, faithlessness in the covenant.
00:39:22.840 Despite having incredible covenant advantages, the word of God, the prophets, the priesthood,
00:39:26.620 temple the promises the blessings their faithless presumption was a massive
00:39:34.260 problem Matthew 3 9 John the Baptist says and do not presume to say to
00:39:39.820 yourselves we have Abraham as our father for I tell you God is able from these
00:39:43.780 stones to raise up children of Abraham don't presume don't presume now the
00:39:53.160 problem is, is when you confuse presumption with assurance. Have assurance. Assurance comes from
00:40:00.260 faith. Presumption comes from works. That's the distinction. Presumption is a type of self-deception
00:40:12.200 that plunges many reformed families into spiritual apathy. They engage in church activities, 0.63
00:40:21.520 religious duties, but their hearts are operating from a legalistic, works-based position.
00:40:30.820 Covenant assurance stems from faith.
00:40:34.540 It's the posture of knowing that you contribute nothing to the blessings and promises of God.
00:40:42.160 Covenant presumption views your works as the basis for securing blessings and promises.
00:40:47.740 And it's not like you're all the way in one camp or you're all the way in the other. 0.98
00:40:51.520 The problem with Christians is that you're mostly in the faith camp, 0.97
00:40:54.540 but then you tiptoe over here with some works, 0.99
00:40:57.420 hoping that they might kind of change the landscape and move the needle.
00:41:02.260 None of it is going to move the needle.
00:41:05.400 You know where you get to move the needle?
00:41:08.720 Abide in the vine.
00:41:12.200 Imagine a flower hanging off of a branch,
00:41:14.900 trying to grow by reaching upward.
00:41:19.840 No.
00:41:20.980 You know how a flower grows?
00:41:22.300 Reaching downward to the roots of Christ. 1.00
00:41:30.060 Again, both groups work. 0.51
00:41:33.440 The presumers, the assurance, they both work.
00:41:38.080 And from the outside, people are going to come up to you and say,
00:41:41.100 oh, you're a blessed family.
00:41:42.060 It must be a result of your efforts.
00:41:43.320 Teach me how you do your things.
00:41:47.600 But you know better.
00:41:48.560 you know that the blessedness of your family is not because of your works but because of God
00:41:55.020 and you know that the blessings of faithful children is because you had faith in the promise
00:42:05.400 in the promise not because you worked for the promise no God will save your kids even if you
00:42:12.920 tried to work for the promise because he loves you because you're actually born again
00:42:16.020 And God will work an extraordinary means out of grace.
00:42:19.560 But the posture of your parenting needs to be working from the promise,
00:42:25.240 not for the promise.
00:42:28.480 All right, I'm almost done here, and I want to talk to the kids.
00:42:31.640 Children, I want you guys to pay attention to me here for a minute, okay?
00:42:37.580 I want you all to recognize what an immense blessing it is
00:42:43.940 to be born into a Christian home.
00:42:49.120 You were not born into the home of God-haters
00:42:54.660 or demon worshippers or pagans.
00:42:58.920 You were born into the absolute blessing
00:43:01.960 of having Christian parents.
00:43:05.660 God has blessed you by birth.
00:43:10.000 and it's something that is a great privilege that you are not to take it or take for granted
00:43:18.240 scripture says as i said earlier pay attention children obey your parents in the lord
00:43:25.660 now you are not trying to become a follower of christ you are a follower of christ you are
00:43:34.780 a follower of Christ
00:43:36.340 just as a child
00:43:39.080 born into a Muslim family is Muslim
00:43:40.980 and just like the family
00:43:43.120 that's born a child
00:43:44.720 that are atheist is an atheist
00:43:46.380 you are a Christian
00:43:48.760 because you were born into a Christian family
00:43:50.880 that is your identity
00:43:54.080 you're in the covenant
00:43:56.600 and where you
00:43:59.040 are God expects you to
00:44:01.020 grow God expects you to
00:44:03.080 grow three year olds
00:44:04.660 five-year-olds, seven-year-olds, 10-year-olds, 14-year-olds, God expects you to grow where
00:44:12.120 you are.
00:44:14.180 And the Bible says, if you don't grow, you will be cut off.
00:44:21.440 Jesus says in John 15, five through six, I am the vine and you are the branches.
00:44:30.060 He who abides in me and I in him bear much fruit.
00:44:32.600 for without me you can do nothing
00:44:34.960 if anyone does not
00:44:37.640 abide in me 0.90
00:44:38.340 he is cast out as a branch
00:44:41.720 and is withered
00:44:42.560 at some degree
00:44:45.460 this branch was connected
00:44:46.660 because there's withering
00:44:49.820 there's withering
00:44:52.840 was it that the child
00:44:57.360 lost his faith? no that can't be it
00:44:59.140 Jesus doesn't lose
00:45:01.580 any 0.83
00:45:01.840 it goes on it says and then they gather them and throw them into the fire and
00:45:08.740 they are burned children God calls you to grow to abide in Christ Proverbs 22 6
00:45:19.660 says train up a child in the way he should go and even when he is old he
00:45:25.400 will not depart from it now this wisdom is based on what is called the law of
00:45:33.920 initial conditions the law of initial conditions I once heard a helpful
00:45:39.980 illustration that I think will be good for the kids if a young tree has a
00:45:44.540 crooked trunk if a young tree has a crooked trunk it'll remain crooked even
00:45:52.760 when it gets big. When a tree is small and the trunk is really thin, it's really easy to make
00:46:00.660 that tree trunk straight. You can bend it and make it straight. However, when that tree grows up
00:46:13.280 and that trunk gets much wider, it's very difficult, almost impossible to bend that trunk
00:46:22.140 to be straight. And so it's the same way as that if you're a child, if you're young
00:46:29.980 and you're crooked right now, and you're crooked in some way, if you disobey now,
00:46:40.640 if you do not pray now, if you do not love others now, if you're not wanting to read your Bible now, 0.50
00:46:46.660 you should not expect that all of a sudden you're going to start doing those things when you're 25
00:46:52.120 God wants faithfulness from you now
00:46:56.840 He wants three-year-old faithfulness
00:46:58.620 Five-year-old faithfulness
00:47:00.020 Eight-year-old faithfulness
00:47:01.300 Twelve-year-old faithfulness
00:47:02.940 And He wants it from you now
00:47:05.300 God commands you to have faith in Christ now
00:47:10.100 To worship Christ now
00:47:13.900 To pray to Christ now
00:47:16.820 And to grow in Christ now
00:47:20.500 so i'm going to close with just a couple points of application
00:47:26.020 trust in god's promises okay reflect on whether your parenting is motivated
00:47:35.280 by trust in god's promises or by your own works to receive those promises truly spend the week
00:47:43.360 evaluating that. Every time you make a disciplining decision, examine where the
00:47:51.060 motive's at. Remember that the blessing of faithful children comes from standing
00:47:56.760 on God's promises by faith, not from trying to earn them through works. Number
00:48:03.200 two, work from faith. Just because you have faith doesn't mean that you don't
00:48:12.340 work. No, you work because you have faith. That's the paradigm. Everyone should see you doing
00:48:20.320 Christian things, okay? You should be doing a lot of Christian things. The motive for those things
00:48:27.100 is faith. You're not legalistically earning anything. You're advertising your own gratitude.
00:48:37.120 they should witness
00:48:40.440 the onlooking world should witness you catechizing your kids
00:48:43.460 and praying for them and worshiping with them
00:48:45.900 and reading stories to them and modeling righteousness for them
00:48:48.480 they should see an entire Christian
00:48:51.920 worldview being imparted and implanted
00:48:54.420 into your children
00:48:55.180 you're working hard
00:48:59.680 laboring from faith
00:49:01.820 from faith
00:49:03.680 I'll close with a quote from Doug Wilson
00:49:10.720 who's probably been the most influential on me
00:49:13.980 seen through a covenantal lens
00:49:18.040 he says faithfulness is full of faith
00:49:22.440 I love that faithfulness is full of faith
00:49:26.480 not full of autonomous works
00:49:29.680 if you come to the covenant without faith
00:49:32.900 you'll lose the promise.
00:49:36.820 If you come to the covenant in faith 0.60
00:49:39.240 even the size of a mustard seed
00:49:42.980 God will give you the whole world.
00:49:47.180 Amen.
00:49:49.420 May the Lord bless us
00:49:51.140 to parent our covenantal children
00:49:53.780 from faith.
00:49:55.640 Let's pray.
00:49:58.360 Father we
00:49:59.260 we ask, Lord, that you would help us make distinctions, biblical distinctions.
00:50:07.040 We know that deception is often in the gray.
00:50:13.260 Lord, help these things become more black and white to us.
00:50:16.720 Help us to see the subtleties that we're not tempted to think in the flesh,
00:50:22.640 that we're not tempted to think as the enemy would like us to think.
00:50:27.440 Lord, saturate us with your spirit
00:50:31.280 fill us with the truth
00:50:33.000 give us convictions of righteousness and sin
00:50:35.780 help us to see what it means to be a covenantal parent
00:50:39.080 that we might view our kids the way you want us to view our kids
00:50:42.780 form our minds
00:50:45.440 and our actions and our parenting and our disciplining
00:50:48.240 and our praying after your own heart
00:50:51.440 we thank you for your word
00:50:54.520 that gives us a map, that gives us truth,
00:50:57.940 that gives us direction that we are not lost, wanting.
00:51:02.260 And we thank you for your faithfulness to your people.
00:51:05.360 In Jesus' name, amen.
00:51:07.920 Amen.