How millionaires run their family
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Summary
As a CEO and business owner, you should be running your family better than 99% of normal people out there. There s three things you're doing in your business that if you applied it to your family, would turn it from frustration and disappointment to one of motivation and truly feeling supported. And in the end, would help you in business even more.
Transcript
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As a CEO and business owner, you should be running your family better than 99% of normal people out
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there. There's three things you're doing in your business that if you applied it to your family
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would turn it from frustration and disappointment to one of motivation and truly feeling supported
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and in the end would help you in your business even more. When my wife and I decided to have
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kids, we essentially went from just being two in love cuddle bugs to getting pregnant with
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our first child, starting two new companies. Three months after giving birth, we found out
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we were pregnant on the second one. We decided to move twice in a two-year period. To say that
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our life was hectic would be an understatement. One of the big things that we had to come to
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realization around is that we needed to synchronize. We needed to talk. So now every week we get
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together. We have a very structured meeting that I want to share with you that allows us to feel
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in sync. Here's how it works. So I'm going to break this into two parts. The first part is
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who you should be meeting with every week. And the second part is what's the agenda,
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when I'm talking to make sure I cover all points.
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So the who is, first off, your partner in life.
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See, I think most relationships end up not working out
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Over time, that fracture gets bigger and bigger and bigger.
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wondering what the other person is thinking and doing.
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Maybe I just did something that really upset her.
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I've got to be on the receiving end of that feedback.
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because we have an opportunity to express ourselves
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in a way that doesn't feel like we're attacking each other
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on how we can become better for the other person.
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of our lives what's going on for my wife what's going on for me trips travel workshops events
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client meetings people flying in to meet with us just as an opportunity for us to review and see
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if there's things we can do to make that experience better the most important thing to figure out in
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that part of our meeting is what's going on on the weekend if we're in a rush we always do at least
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the weekend then at least two weeks but preferably six weeks out so we're never feeling like we're
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responding to information that we weren't aware of too busy people things can get a little crazy
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we need to synchronize and make that happen number four is our scorecard first off we measure our
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financials i'm a big fan of teaching my wife how i manage all the investments i want to make sure
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that she's always in the loop with what we're doing and she never feels like she doesn't know
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where anything's going on the other area is our core values so as a family we have core values
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and we use those to guide us so we always measure ourselves on a weekly basis how are we showing up
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in society how are we communicating that with our kids we score ourselves and then finally we look
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at the core goals that we've set for ourselves each quarter.
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So Scorecard is really a way for us to stop, measure,
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get a quantitative feedback loop on how we're doing
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in regards to the way we wanna measure and show up.
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Whatever areas to discuss and have conversations around,
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but also the projects that are going on in our lives.
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just click the link below, go download your copy.
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So that's how you keep a pulse on your relationship.
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But the next section is the rhythm that you need to follow.
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We run three quarterly planning sessions every year.
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And then the last one is annual planning for the next year.
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Back in the day, it just got really hard trying to both be driven entrepreneurs, have little babies, and be there for each other.
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And eventually, I thought to myself, why don't we run the same quarterly planning that I do in my businesses for our lives?
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And that quarterly planning rhythm, getting a line, has changed everything for us.
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We look at the previous quarter, and we ask ourselves, did we enjoy that?
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our relationship, our business, all different areas?
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And it's really fun because we look at both professional,
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our businesses, our careers, what do we wanna do?
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Do we have enough time to recharge for ourselves?
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I'm trying to see if there's any dates that overlap,
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and I'm negotiating and I'm collaborating with my wife
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a regret minimization strategy around our personal and professional goals now that you have the plan
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you need this next step to make sure this whole thing works in a weekly cadence about a dozen
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years ago my wife and i went to montreal for a couples event i went there because i wanted to
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learn how i could be a better partner for my wife etc and what i discovered is there was a fear
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a real fear that i may go on this journey of self-improvement and growth and leave my wife
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behind. Here's what I learned and it changed everything for me is oftentimes when we're
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climbing the mountain, we have this desire to reach down and pull people up. If anything,
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we want it for them more than they want it for themselves. But you got to understand the person
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that's on that journey, they're looking up at you going, I don't know if I can keep up. And I feel
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like you're going to grow so far that you're going to wake up one day and not want to be with me
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anymore. What we want to do is we want to hold space for our partners. We try to pull them up
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the mountain essentially in that constrained form. There's no light. There's no nothing to
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get inside and instead do this, hold the space for your partner. And that changed everything for us
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and it allowed us to understand how to create alignment, specifically using the MVV framework
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that I want to share with you guys now. So the MVV framework starts with mission. It's very
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important that we have a North Star. We have a direction that the whole team or your family is
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aiming towards because what I learned a long time ago is we don't get the life we want,
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we get the life that we focus on and if we don't have a clear mission for where we're going then
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it's easy for us to feel confused and not really be intentional so every family should sit down
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and be deliberate around the mission statement for their family here's the one for Renee and I
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as a family we want to inspire other families to pursue a lifelong journey of exploration
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personal development or growth and accountability in order to better serve their community and
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family. Having that mission statement allows us to show up and play full out aligned with our
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bigger purpose. The second part to the MVV framework is vision. And that's all about the
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destination. Where are you trying to end up? The intentionality of it, deciding I want to be
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personally an epic husband for my wife, independent of how she shows up. See, most people say, well,
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my partner needs to beat me 50-50. That makes zero sense. It's not 50-50. It's 100%. You show up at
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100% 100% of the time all the time not requiring anything you will see your whole relationship
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transform so here's my personal relationship vision for my wife to live in a place of love
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and gratitude compassion and adventure for my lady to make her needs mine and give unconditionally
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to feel her radiance and beauty at every moment I'm just going to encourage you to sit down and
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just think about it what would you want to aspire to for your relationship write that down make a
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commitment to live that as much as you can every day. The third element of the MVV framework is
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value. See, in business, I hire and I fire against our values. The difference is in our family, we
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use it as one opportunity to catch people doing great things, what I call bright spots. When my
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children are doing things that are aligned with our values, we recognize that and we want to catch
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people doing awesome stuff and we want to use it to correct them. So here are our core values in
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the Martell family. We prioritize. Essentially, we put family first. We appreciate. We love and
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support each other. We talk. We communicate in positive ways. We bond. We have fun together.
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Quite a bit of fun. We believe. We love God, ourselves, and each other. We impact. We love
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and serve others. We overcome. We do hard things, and we move. We are healthy and active. Use these
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for inspiration, but better yet, sit down with your family and ask them, how do we want to show
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And come up with a handful that maybe you already have,
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but take the time to be intentional about your values.
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So that's how you run your family like a business.
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Now, if you wanna learn more about how I schedule my day