How to be More Disciplined Than 99.9% of People
Episode Stats
Words per minute
203.54108
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10
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4
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Summary
In this episode, I talk about the discipline triangle and how it can change your life. It's a key piece of advice that I think a lot of people need to hear. If you don't know how to be disciplined, this episode is for you.
Transcript
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What if I told you the reason you can't stay disciplined
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On paper, I look like someone who's mastered this.
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I've even finished a goddamn Ironman seven times.
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If you're missing even one, the whole system breaks down.
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The discipline goes away and it becomes unsustainable.
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I wish someone had showed me this triangle 20 years ago.
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It would have literally saved me a ton of time.
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Growth only lives on the other side of discomfort.
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because what I'm asking you to do is seek discomfort,
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Because here's the reality, pain will happen regardless.
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luckily i tucked and i caught the ground with my back it destroyed my bike it literally almost
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killed me after it happened everybody said to me hey man maybe this is a sign you should slow down
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maybe you should chill out maybe you don't need to race maybe you let your body recover and i said
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maybe this is the reason i'm gonna finish maybe god's testing me right now maybe everything i'm
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asking for is going to exist on the other side of me dealing with this adversity maybe it's getting
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me ready to receive what I've been asking for. Pain wasn't my enemy. It was actually the exact
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thing that I needed to become the kind of person who could finish that kind of race. I rehabbed,
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I trained, I did the work, and I raced. And I ended up beating the time I had set for myself.
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Discomfort is actually the price. And most people are way too cheap to pay it. I didn't get that for
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a long time. But once I did, everything changed around me. So here's how you do it. The first
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thing is you have to pick one challenge that scares you. And when I say scared, it might make
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you feel uncomfortable, might give you anxiety. Maybe it's shooting a video every day for 100
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days. Maybe it's going to the gym every day for 100 days. I need you to pick one challenge that
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you can commit to. Physical or putting yourself out there, they're the best because there's no
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way to fake it. You either did it or you didn't do it. You either went to the gym or posted the
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video or you didn't do it. Then you have to tell people. When you tell people, you activate the
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positive peer pressure. You have other people that now know that you made a commitment to do
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that thing and they will ask you, hey man, how you doing with that? And the best part is you have to
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show up daily. That's why a daily rhythm of hard is the right strategy to train your response to
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discomfort, to choose hard, to choose pain. When you default to things being hard, you go good
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because you know everybody else will give up. That's when you know you're on the right path.
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without knowing why, that's not discipline, that's suffering.
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That's where the second piece of the triangle comes in,
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You have to have a why, you have to have a direction,
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purpose ones they last purpose turns struggle into fuel the bigger the why the stronger the why
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the easier the how because if you don't know why you're doing it as soon as the pain shows up
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you'll give up one of my favorite stories is my buddy he's done 16 ironmans but he's never really
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pushed himself and i remember the last race his coach called him out and said hey man i don't
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think i've ever seen your potential you're showing up you're doing all the work but i've never seen
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you actually race because i don't think you have a reason to push i don't think you have a purpose
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and he challenged him he said for each part of the ironman i want you to pretend that you're
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finishing it to save your children when he got out of the swim his coach said to him your daughter's
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safe and he came back and in the transition his coach said to him your second daughter's safe
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and he ran and he finished that race to his three beautiful girls doing his best time he's ever done
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but pain with purpose, that's f***ing transformation.
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And then what's cool is you connect your pain to a value.
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Maybe your values are family, maybe it's freedom,
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Make the reason you show up and do the hard thing
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to be an example of somebody that embraces those values.
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If you make this about you, you've already lost the race.
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if you don't tell them, then you'll just quietly give up.
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Yet again, another time, you try and it didn't last.
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they're going to ask you why. And I learned a long time ago, you'll do 10 times more for somebody
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else than you'll ever do for yourself because you don't want to let them down. You don't want to
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disappoint them. You don't want to be that guy. And finally, write your whys down. Read them daily.
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Put them at the top of your goals list. Make sure that you understand the purpose behind the projects,
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the purpose behind the goals, the purpose behind the outcomes. If you don't, the pain will overwhelm
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you. But with a big enough why, the how is so freaking easy, especially when it gets hard.
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Now, purpose gives your pain meaning, but it's still just potential. What actually changes you
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is what happens after you follow through. That's where the final piece of the discipline triangle
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really comes in. Proof. You don't need more grit or blind confidence. You need more evidence. You
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need more fucking receipts of you proving to yourself that you've done the things you say
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you're gonna do. Too often people are like, I'm gonna be a millionaire in a year. Prove it. What
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did you do today? What did you do last week? I'm interested in that. Show me your calendar. Show
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me the receipts. Show me the evidence. See, what you say doesn't matter. It's the proof that you
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backed it up with action. Every time you keep the promise that you've made to yourself or other
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people, you've collected another receipt. And ultimately, enough receipts equals real confidence.
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This is what builds proof. That's why the discipline triangle requires it. You stop
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hoping you're that person you start knowing you are and then knowing the deep knowingness that
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you're that guy the next challenge way easier the person who walks in the room confidence the ask of
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the customer to give you money no problem that's what makes you unstoppable when i go back the
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first sprint triathlon it just gave me proof and every time i've crossed another finish line since
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then the easier the next feels when i finished my first full distance ironman when i crossed the
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finish line, it wasn't about the metal. It was about that voice in my head that used to doubt
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me. In that moment, I had the answer to those doubts. It wasn't luck. It wasn't hype. It was
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years of trial and error finally clicking into place. I had proof. I did exactly what I said I
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would do. This is the reason. Confidence is the byproduct of keeping the commitments you make to
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yourself in private. Private means those conversations you have in your head. So when
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it comes to proof, here's what you got to remember. Keep small promises to yourself. Those little tiny
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ones, they start and they can erode so easily. It's like a drop of water. Over time, it can literally
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bore a hole through stone. And you think it's not a big deal, it's a big deal. And whether you did
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it or not, track it down. Track what you said you'd do and whether you did it or not. Third, the next
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one, don't aim for perfect. Aim for consistency. Perfection is procrastination in disguise. It's
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also self-sabotage. Too many people get ready to start as self-sabotaging themselves from ever
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achieving their goals. And then we have to stack the wins, even the messy ones. If you got up and
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went to the gym, I don't care if you didn't feel like it was the best workout of your life,
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you got it done. And the best part, let your actions speak louder than your plans. I don't
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care what you're going to do. I care what you did. You care what you did. You know what you
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committed to. Follow through. If you lock in all three, pain, purpose, and proof, discipline stops
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feeling so fucking heavy. At the end of the day, this is what real discipline is. Discipline isn't
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about pursuing harder. It's about building something that lasts. Use it, man. Use it.
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Use it to build your 10.0 self. It took me so frigging long to learn this, and you just got
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it in a single sitting. So don't waste it. Go live it. Be the kind of motherfucker who gets
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happy when things get hard. And if you want to take this to the next level and get rid of the
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fear of rejection, click here and I'll see you on the other side.