I’m 45. If I Was 20 Again, Here’s What I’d Do
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Summary
If I could go back and talk to my 20-year-old self and give him some advice, here are the 60 things I would share: 1. Stop waiting for the right time. 2. Buy the way you want to be bought from. 3. Your 20s are when you get good. Your 30 s are when your get good, and your 40 s is when you become wise. 4. Don t be scared of failure. 5. Winners lose more than losers ever will. 6. If every time you make a commitment to yourself, you let yourself down by not keeping that commitment, then you'll never fight for what you think you deserve. 7. If it's not a hard no, it's a hard yes. 8. Say yes when you don't have a lot of opportunities. 9. Say no when you can afford to say no. 10. Don't complain about the outcomes you didn t get from the work you didn't do. 11. Focus on the things you do every day. 12. I pull my future into the present by being very clear on what I wanna achieve and taking action. 13. I only take advice from people who are already where I wanna be or have done the thing I wanna do. 14. The best revenge is massive. 15. I didn t make the best decisions. 16. I just focus on proving them wrong.
Transcript
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Recording this today, I'm a 45-year-old multi-millionaire,
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but if I could go back and talk to my 20-year-old self
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Most people, the most important thing they gotta do
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Stop waiting to get ready and just fucking do it.
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Number two, broke people buy distractions,
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so you don't spend your time running a bunch of errands.
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The first 10 was to develop the skill to become valuable.
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The last 10 was using that to create my empire.
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You have to dedicate yourself in decades to one focus.
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Number four, buy the way you want to be bought from.
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Most people are so cheap, they get mad when buyers are cheap with them,
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but they're the ones that put the energy out there.
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So if you want people to easily buy from you, easily buy from other people.
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Number five, winners lose more than losers ever will.
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Most people are scared to fail, but that's only true if you don't get the feedback.
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If you take a shot on goal and you miss, but you learn how to take a better shot on goal,
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Number six, self-esteem is the reputation you have with yourself.
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If every time you make a commitment to yourself,
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you let yourself down by not keeping that commitment,
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then you erode your self-esteem, your self-worth,
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and you'll never fight for what you think you deserve.
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Number seven, if it's not a hell yes, it's a hard no.
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I ask myself, if somebody asked me to do the thing
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they want me to do and it was today, would I say yes?
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then I won't have the space to say yes to the great.
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Number eight, say yes until you can afford to say no.
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You say yes when you don't have a lot of opportunities,
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but then if you're good, you get a lot more requests,
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Number nine, the best way to predict the future
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Number 10, you can't complain about the outcomes
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Just listen to yourself when you're with your friends.
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which is shit about other people that aren't even there.
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Number 13, how you do anything is how you do everything.
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So you gotta figure out what are the three to five things
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that if you do every day will set you up for success.
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Number 15, the best revenge is massive success.
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If you compare yourself to everybody else,
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then you're always looking for why you're not good enough.
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And the truth is you're only competing against one person
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Number 17, most people are too afraid of looking stupid
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Think about all the people you see on social media.
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The reason they're good is because they decided to start.
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because if you think everything makes you look dumb,
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or you don't, you're 100% accountable for that.
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Because you will believe what you repeatedly say
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Number 20, 80% of your problems would be solved
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Set an alarm for when you go to bed and just honor it.
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Number 21, the problem isn't lack of resources,
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Most people think, well, I don't have the money
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to start that or the friend group or the experience.
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The truth is most people that have won in life,
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Number 22, learn to be alone without being lonely.
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I've learned is become the person who needs nothing from anybody. If I can be happy with
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nothing, then I'm going to be ecstatic with a lot. Number 23, work while they sleep so you can live
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like they dream. Most people would rather sleep in and snooze on their life, but you're different.
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You're going to get up early every day, do the hard things and live a life that 99% of people
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only dream of. Number 24, you teach people how to treat you. If somebody does something that I don't
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agree with, I say it right away. I don't accept people stepping all over me. Number 25, money is
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a tool, not the goal. I think of money like a battery. It's an energy source. And we want to
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use money as a tool to improve our life. You don't want to hoard it. Number 26, if you're always
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available, you're not valuable. You should be the kind of person that puts themselves out there so
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everybody knows who you are. You should be easy to find, but hard to get a hold of. That's what
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makes you valuable. Number 27, you don't attract what you want. You attract what you are. Most
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people think they got to do more to be successful. I would argue you have to be more. It's not do
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then become. It's actually become then do. Number 28, no response is a response and a powerful one.
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You don't have to reply to every email that comes to you. You don't have to answer every phone call
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and you don't have to reply to every text. Don't feel like you need to explain yourself to everyone.
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Number 29, you either get better or you get bitter.
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hey, remember back in the day we did this or that?
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And I'm just like, what have you been up to lately?
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Because it sounds like you've been just living the same life
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Number 30, time is the most expensive thing you have.
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Focus your time on things that matter most to you,
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sustainable wealth, they got rich and they still got it,
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Number 32, the secret to success is consistency,
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not intensity. I'm not impressed with somebody that can get up and go to the gym for 14 days
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in a row. I am impressed that somebody can be consistent over six months. Number 33,
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you're only as strong as your weakest habit. Having a bunch of vices, habits, decisions that
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you're not proud of, like eating too much, drinking too much, being addicted to your phone.
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It's kind of like going on a hike with a backpack full of rocks. You can do it. It's just going to
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be way harder and it'll definitely slow you down in a big way. Number 34, regret will hurt more
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When I fast forward to my last day, my last breath,
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So every day I minimize my regrets by taking action today.
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I don't wait, I don't push off, I don't get in the mood,
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I don't wait for my feelings to feel good, I just do.
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and it's not your responsibility to have to explain it.
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it's okay leaving people in the reality that they find themselves with. You want to learn to pick
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your fights because you don't want to be in a fight with somebody who doesn't want to see you
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win. Number 36. If you're always the smartest person in the room, you're in the wrong room.
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It feels good to be the top dog, the smartest person in the room, the person that has all
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the answers. Problem is the way to be successful is you got to get comfortable being the smallest
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person in the room. Number 37. Don't let temporary people create permanent wounds. Friends come into
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your life for either a reason, a season, or a lifetime. If you know the difference, you decide
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to let those people stay in the past. Number 38, distractions destroy more dreams than lack of
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resources ever will. Most people don't lack opportunity, they lack focus. Number 39, if you've
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never contradicted yourself, you're not growing fast enough. What that means is that if you're
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truly on a growth journey, and you're reading, and you're investing, you're going to develop
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new points of view, which means that your new beliefs are different than the old ones. So if
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you keep believing the same thing you used to believe, then are you really growing fast enough?
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The key in all of this is to be confident about what you believe. That's why I say often wrong,
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never in doubt. Number 40, get obsessed with the process, not the outcome. Fall in love with the
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art and the betterment and the person you're becoming as you pursue the goal, not the actual
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goal itself. If you disconnect from the need of achieving something to be happy, instead be happy
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in the process of achieving that's a life of fulfillment number 41 winners make adjustments
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losers make excuses if you want to win you're gonna have to tweak things you're gonna have to
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learn from whatever happened and move forward the people that try and never try ever again
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is because they make excuses for themselves it's never their fault and they don't learn anything
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don't fall into the trap of explaining yourself out of winning number 42 if you want an extraordinary
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life stop making ordinary choices the whole point of being extra is that you're doing things that
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other people wouldn't do if everybody around you is saying that's a good decision you might want
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to be concerned because for you to be extraordinary you need to be extra number 43 if you hang around
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with five winners you'll be the six most people are the byproducts of the people they spend the
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most time with if you do not make a decision to find those other five people and work your way
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then you're just gonna make it hard on yourself.
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Number 44, the best investment you'll ever make
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so you can increase the money you make when you do work,
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Number 46, if you chase two rabbits, you'll catch none.
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you got to pay your dues. You got to show up. You got to be consistent. You got to put a smile on
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and you got to do that over long periods of time. Rent is due every day. You need to stay consistent.
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Number 48, money follows momentum, not perfection. Money loves movement. Money loves speed. Money
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loves decisiveness. The key is you have to move fast and fix things as you're building. Number
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49, if your goals don't scare you, they're too small. I used to think I was thinking big and
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then I moved to San Francisco. And it went from being a millionaire to being a billionaire. Because
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if you showed up to a coffee shop talking about your million dollar ideas, people would literally
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stop talking to you and walk the other way. You have to dream bigger, but even more important,
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execute harder. Number 50, confidence isn't thinking you're better than others. It's knowing
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you don't have to compare. Confidence isn't a lack of being humble. It's the certainty that you know
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you do the things you say that you're going to do because of who you are. That's why you have to
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learn to run your own race. Number 51, if you can't lead yourself, don't expect others to follow
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you. Just like in a plane, before you help anybody else, you have to put your mask on. And too often
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people are ready to give everybody else advice on what's going wrong in their life, but they don't
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want to look in the mirror and ask themselves, am I being honest about what's going on in my life?
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Number 52, good is the freaking enemy of great. The most people that achieve a little bit of
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success, they stop. Now all of a sudden they've got something to lose. They forgot why they started
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The challenge is, is all great people never settled.
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All your self-doubt comes from a lack of doing.
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Just get up and move forward towards your goals.
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ask better questions. The better the question, the better the life. And what's crazy is your
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questions will dictate your future. Number 55. If you hate Mondays, you're doing life wrong.
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You have to design a life where you get excited to get out of bed. It's the people, it's the
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projects, it's the energy, it's you. At the end of the day, what you put out is what you get back.
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So find work that lights you up. Number 56. Your vibe attracts your tribe. It's so crazy,
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but your energy, how you feel attracts other people
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So what you need to do is just put out your vibe.
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Somebody asks you how you're doing, say freaking amazing.
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Number 57, you receive what you desire for others.
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If you want to get in the best shape of your life,
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If you wanna be rich, help other people get rich.
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if you want to be happy, help other people be happy. It's so interesting that what you want
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for other people is what you'll get back in return. Number 58, your life is the byproduct
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of your most dominant thoughts, feelings, and actions. If you're not happy with where you're at,
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then ask yourself, what am I thinking about? How am I feeling about my situation? And what am I
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doing about it? If you look at those three things, you can change your whole life by just that focus.
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The truth is, you already know what you need to do.