Dan Martell - May 22, 2023


Make Rich Friends (Without Money)


Episode Stats

Length

11 minutes

Words per Minute

210.93683

Word Count

2,443

Sentence Count

83


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
00:00:00.000 Here's how I went from knowing zero people to getting Mark Cuban to invest in my company
00:00:04.260 and Richard Branson invited me to spend a week at his house in Switzerland.
00:00:07.900 So here's the deal. I recently had a bunch of my high-end clients in town in this place called
00:00:12.040 Kelowna where I live in British Columbia. And as we went around to visit different companies and
00:00:17.880 had speakers come in and I hosted them all at my house, a lot of them came to me and said,
00:00:23.220 hey man, like you've only been here for a little over a year and a half.
00:00:26.100 how have you created this network of not only incredible entrepreneurs, but a lifestyle where
00:00:31.980 you're, you're doing founders hikes every Tuesday and there's mountain bike nights and there's
00:00:36.240 wake surf Fridays and all these different aspects of my lifestyle that for me, I didn't even think
00:00:41.520 anything of it. They were like, I want to create this in my city. And what I did is I sat down and
00:00:47.120 I unpacked it because people have come to me over the years and be like, how did you build this
00:00:51.980 network? How do you get Mark Cuban to decide to write you a check for 250 grand, not on Shark
00:00:57.120 Tank, for your company? Who did you know to get him to do that? Or why did you spend a week with
00:01:02.700 Richard Branson, with Tim Ferriss and the co-founder of Square and the founder of Braintree that sold
00:01:08.460 for 800 million? What happened in your life that got people to want to spend time with you and
00:01:14.200 invite you to do these things? And what I want to share with you is my strategies for networking
00:01:19.020 with billionaires creating value when you feel like you don't have a lot to give or reach out
00:01:23.980 to people in a way that doesn't look douchey i mean so many people do this wrong and i want to
00:01:28.700 break down the four key areas that i think will take your networking your ability to add value
00:01:34.540 to another level number one is become valuable even without confidence you know when i moved
00:01:42.140 to san francisco i was 28 years old this was 2008 and i didn't know a soul i went there with my
00:01:48.620 my mountain bike and my backpack.
00:01:50.300 And I wanted to network,
00:01:51.960 I wanted to meet other entrepreneurs.
00:01:53.640 And I thought I had a good strategy.
00:01:55.120 I'm just gonna go around to coffee shops
00:01:57.120 and meet people and just say hi and start conversation.
00:02:00.780 It was so crazy.
00:02:01.620 What happened to me was I would be there,
00:02:03.860 you know, trying to meet people
00:02:05.320 and I talked to this person and they would go,
00:02:07.540 what do you do?
00:02:08.460 And I would say, well, you know what?
00:02:09.560 Nothing much, I just moved here.
00:02:11.020 And immediately they would lose interest.
00:02:12.940 And this happened to me day over day over day
00:02:16.200 till eventually I was like, all right,
00:02:17.800 I need to say I do something
00:02:19.960 because these people have zero patience
00:02:21.560 for somebody that's clueless.
00:02:22.960 So eventually I just told people,
00:02:24.580 I help startups with marketing
00:02:26.180 because that's what I was really good at.
00:02:27.520 And immediately they went like, I'm a startup,
00:02:29.800 I need marketing.
00:02:30.800 And then I realized that that skill,
00:02:33.300 that value was a high value skill,
00:02:35.500 that it's something that if I know the person
00:02:37.820 has a challenge around, I can offer it.
00:02:40.020 Now, here's a tip.
00:02:40.960 See, most people that have a high value skill
00:02:42.840 think that they could just offer it,
00:02:44.180 but that's not where the magic happens.
00:02:46.400 but I got really good at what I'm gonna encourage you to do
00:02:49.240 is figure out how to ask questions to uncover the problem
00:02:53.520 to insert your high value skill.
00:02:55.760 See, most of you guys wanna go straight to the offer,
00:02:57.940 but they're immediately gonna go like,
00:02:59.020 I don't have that problem.
00:03:00.360 What you need to figure out is how to ask the questions
00:03:02.960 to uncover the problem that allows the thing
00:03:05.460 that you can help them on to be a natural offer, right?
00:03:10.200 Too often we put the heavy lifting on the person
00:03:12.520 we're trying to build a relationship with
00:03:14.040 when we gotta do it ourselves
00:03:15.700 by getting really good at asking questions.
00:03:17.860 To get even better at this,
00:03:19.240 I wanna teach you the knowledge triangle, okay?
00:03:21.680 Anytime I'm trying to build a skill or learn something,
00:03:24.940 I always think of these three core areas.
00:03:26.860 What are the top three books around this subject?
00:03:29.760 What are the top three seminars
00:03:32.100 or places I could go to learn more around this subject?
00:03:34.620 And who are the top three people in this industry
00:03:37.920 that I should follow or I should pay to learn from?
00:03:40.980 That knowledge triangle will take you
00:03:42.960 from not feeling valuable about what you do
00:03:46.180 to becoming really world-class at it
00:03:48.440 and offering that up when you identify the problem
00:03:51.580 the person is having where you can insert
00:03:54.540 your high value skill.
00:03:56.080 Number two is how to add value when you don't have a skill.
00:04:00.560 See, a lot of people are like,
00:04:01.620 well, I don't know where I can be helpful.
00:04:03.900 I don't have a thing like sales or marketing
00:04:06.760 that can help somebody get a result really quick, right?
00:04:10.060 I'm not that organized.
00:04:11.620 I'm not good at project management.
00:04:13.060 I'm not that outgoing.
00:04:14.560 I just don't have that skill.
00:04:16.280 Here's the thing that I underestimated for years,
00:04:20.140 and it's the idea of bringing people together.
00:04:22.840 That alone adds a ton of value for people.
00:04:26.180 Back when I was in my early 20s,
00:04:27.640 I read this incredible book by a guy named Keith Frazzi
00:04:30.320 called Never Eat Alone.
00:04:31.520 And in this book, he argues that one of the best ways
00:04:35.300 to build relationships, deep, meaningful connections
00:04:38.100 with people is to break bread with them.
00:04:40.320 And I was thinking to myself,
00:04:41.740 there's no way that any person that's in business
00:04:44.680 is gonna take time out of their day
00:04:46.480 to come eat a meal with me
00:04:48.280 if there's no way for me to add value.
00:04:49.760 Now, this is the trick, is what Keith suggested
00:04:52.500 is also invite other people
00:04:54.440 that that person should get to know.
00:04:56.080 And here's why that's a beautiful strategy
00:04:58.480 is just by bringing them together,
00:05:00.600 you become valuable to that person.
00:05:03.220 You know, I taught this to my friend, Scott Olford,
00:05:05.380 back when he was a teenager.
00:05:06.960 If you don't know who Scott is,
00:05:08.060 He's a very successful online entrepreneur.
00:05:10.680 And I met him when he lived in Newfoundland, Canada,
00:05:13.660 this island on the Atlantic coast of Canada.
00:05:17.240 And he was a young teenager.
00:05:18.800 And I invited him to a founder's lunch
00:05:20.880 that I hosted while I was speaking at this event.
00:05:22.860 And he was so taken back by the fact that, you know,
00:05:25.920 he reached out to me for advice.
00:05:27.340 I invited him to this lunch.
00:05:28.460 I invited these other entrepreneurs.
00:05:29.700 He met these other speakers.
00:05:31.240 And he was just like, wow, that's really interesting.
00:05:33.360 Do you always do this?
00:05:34.400 And I'm like, yeah,
00:05:35.400 it's something I've been doing for a long time.
00:05:36.940 I read this book.
00:05:37.700 told him about it and Scott took that to another level he literally went to New York City organized
00:05:43.960 a ton of dinners went to Toronto organized a ton of dinners and he built his network when you
00:05:49.000 see the network he's created today and the people that he knows it was a huge byproduct of just
00:05:55.100 bringing people together and the value is in them knowing each other and they contribute it to you
00:06:01.400 So execute the dinner strategy.
00:06:03.540 Here's how to do it.
00:06:04.380 There's three steps.
00:06:05.220 One, schedule it first.
00:06:07.340 Two, group it, meaning start recruiting people
00:06:10.280 to add to the group.
00:06:11.460 And then third, connect it,
00:06:13.220 meaning that after the dinner,
00:06:14.740 I want you to connect everybody with each other,
00:06:17.240 cell phones, emails, just ask everybody at the meal
00:06:19.420 if they're okay with it,
00:06:20.400 and be the person that brought them together.
00:06:23.040 The third strategy is how to be a fan of somebody
00:06:25.960 without being a weirdo.
00:06:27.700 You know, I used to think that I don't wanna be that guy.
00:06:31.040 You know, those people that they run around,
00:06:33.040 they meet somebody that's doing something interesting
00:06:35.060 and they're always like glad handing
00:06:36.340 and they're like asking for a photo
00:06:38.040 and they're just, it's almost like
00:06:39.480 they're collecting relationships, right?
00:06:42.280 You're not even sure if they even know
00:06:43.860 what that person has done.
00:06:45.080 They're just like, oh, that person's important.
00:06:46.900 So I'm gonna take a picture with them.
00:06:48.540 So I never wanted to be that guy.
00:06:50.480 But what I've come to appreciate and understand
00:06:53.100 is I wanna be other people's biggest fans.
00:06:56.340 And the way I do this in a very tasteful way
00:06:58.700 is every day when I'm on social media,
00:07:00.600 I try to identify three people
00:07:02.860 that I acknowledge what they're doing,
00:07:05.640 that I think the content they're putting out there
00:07:07.420 is really great.
00:07:08.000 So if you know somebody that's had some kind of achievement,
00:07:10.580 they won an award and you're friendly with them,
00:07:13.560 send them a message and just be like, congratulations.
00:07:16.340 Like, wow, that must've been so hard.
00:07:18.280 I'm really impressed with your persistence.
00:07:20.140 Like, this is really inspiring me to think better
00:07:22.380 or bigger about my own life.
00:07:24.220 Send them that message.
00:07:25.340 I'm telling you, the more you do that
00:07:27.240 with the people that have the blue check marks,
00:07:29.400 you will start to build a relationship.
00:07:31.520 You're not saying that they're better than you
00:07:33.440 or that you're here and they're up on this pedestal.
00:07:36.480 You're just acknowledging that that moment,
00:07:38.420 that thing is really impressive.
00:07:40.700 And what I love about it is that it allows me
00:07:43.200 to listen to my heart on what are the moments
00:07:46.520 when I'm going through social media
00:07:47.620 that resonated with me that day.
00:07:49.380 And it could be on TikTok, it could be on Instagram,
00:07:51.820 it could be in the news, but just send those messages
00:07:54.680 because too often I think we think it
00:07:56.800 and we just assume that person is bombarded
00:07:59.280 with messages and they don't hear from anybody you know you read a book and you're like man this
00:08:04.420 this book really transformed my life and the author leaves the email in the last page of the
00:08:09.100 book and you're like man i would love to go and email that author but i don't do it i'm telling
00:08:13.420 you from experience because i've done it with most books i've read email the author and thank
00:08:17.960 them for writing the book we'll get a response almost 100 of the time why because they poured
00:08:23.120 their heart into it and for you to have read that whole book and get to the place where they put
00:08:28.380 their email they know that you showed up you did the work and they're going to acknowledge that with
00:08:34.140 a reply it is one of the coolest thing is to become somebody's fan and let them know what
00:08:38.780 they're doing that's hyping you up that's motivating you to do better in your own life
00:08:43.660 volunteer your time to the biggest problems people have so you can build your network when i moved to
00:08:49.100 san francisco i didn't know a soul and i remember i was just going through meeting people and trying
00:08:54.540 to add value and eventually i came across this lady named cassie and cassie had this event called
00:08:59.580 fail con and we were talking i was just praising her about how cool this event was and just off the
00:09:05.020 cuff i just mentioned to her hey if you ever need help with recruiting speakers let me know and
00:09:10.220 she's like actually that's a big problem that i always have when i'm doing these events would
00:09:14.700 you mind helping out and i was like not at all here's what i learned by offering to volunteer
00:09:19.980 is that the person that recruits the speakers gets to build the relationship with the speakers
00:09:24.460 and now i had something valuable to reach out to really notable people incredible entrepreneurs in
00:09:30.300 silicon valley that i can then take that relationship hand it to cassie she thinks i'm
00:09:35.420 great the speaker thinks that i know cassie and i'm involved in failcon which i wasn't
00:09:39.660 and now i built these relationships i've seen this over and over and over again i remember meeting
00:09:45.420 an incredible entrepreneur named chandler bolt okay he's become a very good friend of mine and
00:09:49.580 he was a volunteer at the first ever mastermind talks event this thing's been going on for 10
00:09:54.780 years it's seen in the industry as the premier event to go to and chandler started as a volunteer
00:10:02.460 now he's a participant it is crazy when people are like i don't know anybody i don't have a network
00:10:07.980 how do i get plugged in volunteer with your time you know my last event every time i do my events
00:10:13.180 i have a handler and oftentimes my team reaches out to our followers on social media asking anybody
00:10:18.540 if they're in that city that would like to help me get around.
00:10:22.120 Like oftentimes I need somebody to help me navigate,
00:10:24.700 you know, the venue and where I'm supposed to be
00:10:26.600 and make sure my laptop's brought here and all this stuff.
00:10:28.900 So we have somebody support me on that front
00:10:30.800 and it is somebody who acts as a volunteer.
00:10:33.560 Now they get to spend eight hours with me, you know?
00:10:36.120 And if you've been following my stuff for a while,
00:10:38.080 that's a big opportunity for them to see how I operate,
00:10:41.680 to ask me questions,
00:10:42.700 to really dig into opportunities
00:10:44.980 for me to support their lives.
00:10:46.160 And that always comes from volunteering.
00:10:48.540 So I wanna encourage you, if you wanna build your network,
00:10:51.500 find the people that are already bringing
00:10:53.060 other folks together and volunteer to help them
00:10:55.780 with whatever they need, whatever their biggest problem is,
00:10:59.540 volunteer, offer to help, show up, be on time, over-deliver,
00:11:04.100 and you will create goodwill that will go on years
00:11:06.560 and decades later to support you in your dreams.
00:11:09.220 One of my favorite quotes on this topic
00:11:11.220 is from Keith Frazzi, and it states that
00:11:13.140 the currency of networking is not greed, but generosity.
00:11:17.540 So go out there and be of service to other people.
00:11:20.740 Offer your time, your skill, your connections,
00:11:23.560 your resources, and that will build the goodwill
00:11:26.020 and the relationships to unlock
00:11:27.920 your biggest opportunities for you.
00:11:30.380 And as per usual, I wanna challenge you
00:11:32.040 to live a bigger life and a bigger business.
00:11:34.120 I'll see you next Monday.