Dan Martell - Stop Wasting Your Life - 7 Things I Quit to Go From Broke to Millionaire

00:00:00.420 Stop wasting your time.

00:00:02.160 I'm gonna share with you the seven things that I quit

00:00:04.220 to go from broke to multi-millionaire.

00:00:06.260 When kids come up to me in my supercars,

00:00:07.940 they always ask, what do you do?

00:00:09.620 But I always share with them, it's not what I do,

00:00:11.640 it's what I don't do.

00:00:12.940 Starting with, number one, 0.99

00:00:14.620 don't spend time with people who suck your energy. 0.99

00:00:17.260 I call them energy vampires. 0.98

00:00:19.080 So I grew up with this friend

00:00:20.200 that I've known since elementary school,

00:00:21.920 and I realized that he'd only ever call me

00:00:24.240 when he needed something from me.

00:00:25.660 Never called me when I had something to share

00:00:27.920 that was good, he never called me

00:00:29.020 when he heard that I was having a hard time.

00:00:30.340 He never called me for any other reason

00:00:32.200 than he needed somebody to help him move something

00:00:34.360 or maybe borrow some money or he was bored.

00:00:36.500 And I realized that is not the kind of friend

00:00:38.680 I want in my life.

00:00:39.620 So I just decided to stop responding to his calls

00:00:41.940 to create some space, to not respond so quickly.

00:00:44.500 I asked myself one day,

00:00:45.680 what does a great friend look like?

00:00:48.060 And it occurred to me,

00:00:49.060 there was no part of the characteristics

00:00:50.920 of what a great friend would act like.

00:00:52.760 He was acting.

00:00:53.760 And yet I just believe

00:00:54.660 because I sat next to him in math class

00:00:56.320 that I had to be friends with him for the rest of my life.

00:00:58.200 That's crazy.

00:00:59.340 Spend time with people who want more for you,

00:01:01.980 not more from you.

00:01:03.420 There's a lot of people out there

00:01:04.520 and if they're not a good friend when you're winning

00:01:06.640 and an ear when you're not doing well,

00:01:08.640 you don't want those people in your life.

00:01:10.180 And that's why I call it a friendventory.

00:01:11.600 You wanna audit the people around you and cut them out

00:01:14.720 if they're not supporting your dreams.

00:01:16.460 If they make it hard for you to win,

00:01:18.200 why would you want those people in your life?

00:01:20.200 And the cool part is if you say no to somebody,

00:01:22.380 you eventually say yes to a new friend.

00:01:24.060 You create the space for somebody new to come into your life

00:01:27.160 that can support you and propel you forward.

00:01:29.020 The way I think about it is today's energy shapes tomorrow's reality.

00:01:33.020 So I have to protect my energy.

00:01:35.140 If you want your life to get better, you have to change your energy.

00:01:38.240 You have to show up with more positivity and opportunity and positive expectation.

00:01:43.240 That's how you change your life.

00:01:44.740 And the truth is, is your environment is everything.

00:01:47.540 Think about it.

00:01:48.000 You could have the most positive attitude and wish that everything is hot.

00:01:51.860 But if I put you in a commercial freezer, you're going to freeze to death.

00:01:55.180 Your environment sets your internal thermostat,

00:01:58.020 not your positive attitude.

00:01:59.780 So make sure that you really audit the people around you.

00:02:02.240 If you wanna stop wasting your life,

00:02:03.720 the first thing you need to do

00:02:04.940 is cut out everyone's sucking your energy. 0.83

00:02:07.260 Which brings us to number two,

00:02:08.800 which is don't ask for advice

00:02:10.360 from people who haven't done what you wanna do.

00:02:12.980 I have these people that come up to me at the gym.

00:02:14.880 They see me working out

00:02:15.640 and they start to try to give me advice on how to work out.

00:02:18.320 And I look at them and I'm not being rude.

00:02:20.540 It's just, if I do the pushup the way you're telling me,

00:02:22.980 will I look like you?

00:02:24.020 because you don't look like my trainer.

00:02:26.300 My coach, Alan, looks like Superman.

00:02:28.580 That guy, I listen to all day long.

00:02:30.760 Somebody else, I don't.

00:02:32.040 Not because I'm trying to be rude,

00:02:33.460 but because what if I listen to them

00:02:35.580 and they don't mean to be harmful

00:02:36.880 and then they cause me to get off track?

00:02:38.940 So here's some of my life principles.

00:02:40.580 I don't take fitness advice from a fat life coach.

00:02:42.840 I don't take business advice from a business coach

00:02:45.400 who has no business.

00:02:46.240 I don't take parenting advice from Elon Musk.

00:02:48.380 The guy's been married three times.

00:02:50.380 He has 12 kids.

00:02:51.420 He's a world-class engineer.

00:02:52.760 If I was building a rocket or any company,

00:02:55.420 he's the guy I want to talk to.

00:02:56.680 How to be in a marriage

00:02:57.720 and how to have great relationship with their kids?

00:02:59.840 No, you got to choose.

00:03:01.360 So this is where everybody makes the mistake

00:03:03.080 because they don't know anybody else.

00:03:04.660 So when they have big life decisions,

00:03:05.960 they usually turn to their parents.

00:03:07.660 The challenge with that is the strategy is flawed

00:03:09.980 because if your parents haven't achieved the thing you want,

00:03:12.520 then they're going to give you the advice

00:03:13.860 that got them what they've got.

00:03:15.460 And if it isn't where you want to end up,

00:03:17.040 then you're just going to follow what they tell you to do

00:03:19.080 to get to exactly where they're at.

00:03:20.540 If you want to be an Olympic athlete,

00:03:21.960 go get advice from somebody who's been to the olympics not the person that's a weekend warrior

00:03:25.640 surround yourself with people who have what you want and don't be afraid to ask them questions

00:03:30.440 success leaves clues if you know how to ask to figure out what the clues are same thing

00:03:35.080 goes for your friends your co-workers your boss if the person hasn't done the thing that you want

00:03:40.200 to do if you don't admire the area of the life that you want results in don't internalize their

00:03:45.640 advice which brings us to point three which is don't blame anyone or anything for your situation

00:03:51.400 When I was younger, I used to blame everyone for anything, any situation that happened in my life.

00:03:56.640 It was somebody else's fault.

00:03:57.880 I was late for work.

00:03:58.820 Somebody cut me off in traffic, didn't get the deal.

00:04:01.280 It's because somebody didn't like me on the call.

00:04:03.360 Nobody else was responsible for my situation.

00:04:06.340 I was the person that became me.

00:04:08.800 I was the one that had the call.

00:04:09.800 I was the one that was driving my car.

00:04:11.060 I was the one that couldn't prepare early enough to show up on time.

00:04:14.440 So what I realized is that when I blamed other people, I lost the ability to control my situation.

00:04:19.620 I can't control other people.

00:04:20.680 I can control me, and if everything is my fault,

00:04:23.820 I have control over that.

00:04:25.020 Blaming other people is another way 0.99

00:04:26.400 of just giving away your power.

00:04:27.860 When you take responsibility, you take control.

00:04:30.560 Imagine cooking a meal, and it doesn't turn out as planned.

00:04:33.700 Blaming the ingredients won't help.

00:04:35.740 Instead, take responsibility as a chef.

00:04:37.800 You cook the meal.

00:04:38.900 You can't control what happens to you,

00:04:40.560 but you can control how you respond.

00:04:42.360 The ability to control your emotions, your feelings,

00:04:45.000 it's the number one predictor of success in life.

00:04:47.320 If any person can easily get you on tilt,

00:04:50.680 get you to react, then they control you and you're not going to be able to manipulate the

00:04:55.940 situation the way you need to get the results you want if other people can get you upset really

00:04:59.900 easily. One of my favorite quotes that I heard is we're not creatures of circumstance. We're

00:05:04.440 creators of circumstance. We control the ability to shape our reality. The world isn't as it is.

00:05:10.840 The world is as we are because if our internal feelings are set right, then everything external

00:05:15.760 can either feel great or feel really hard.

00:05:18.480 If you wanna stop wasting your life,

00:05:20.180 taking ownership of everything in your life

00:05:22.740 will give you power to change it.

00:05:24.480 Which brings us to number four,

00:05:25.840 which is don't say yes to every opportunity

00:05:28.340 that comes your way.

00:05:29.360 When I started, I used to say yes to everything.

00:05:31.720 I was so worried if I didn't,

00:05:33.020 I would miss out on big opportunities

00:05:34.920 because I didn't have a whole lot going in my life.

00:05:36.920 But then what happened is I said yes to so many things

00:05:39.260 that I couldn't actually get anything done.

00:05:41.020 So everything I was committed to got done poorly

00:05:43.900 and then people started getting mad at me.

00:05:45.760 And I realized that saying yes is easy.

00:05:48.140 Saying no is hard.

00:05:49.660 A person that never says no, I can't trust their yes

00:05:52.220 because eventually they're gonna let me down.

00:05:53.840 You don't wanna be that person.

00:05:55.160 I have a buddy.

00:05:55.920 He always says yes to me.

00:05:57.380 And because he's always saying yes,

00:05:58.560 I can't trust his yes

00:05:59.620 because I'm assuming he's saying yes to everybody else

00:06:01.480 and eventually something's gonna fall through the cracks.

00:06:03.260 He can't possibly do it all.

00:06:05.220 Steve Jobs always said,

00:06:06.380 sometimes the most productive thing you can do

00:06:08.340 is to say no.

00:06:09.340 Think of your responsibilities like items in a backpack.

00:06:11.880 If you keep adding more items without removing anything,

00:06:14.960 it becomes too heavy to carry. You only want to say yes to things that align with your goal and

00:06:19.620 your vision. Saying no to a very cool opportunity today is saying yes to your dreams and your goal.

00:06:25.560 If you want to win the biggest way possible and you haven't had success yet, pick one thing and

00:06:30.180 decide to do it for a decade. I call it a dedicate. Decide to go 10 years all in. Put your heads down

00:06:36.740 saying no to everything else. Be maniacal. Be focused. Decide to be the tip of the spear to 0.97

00:06:42.160 become the best in the world at that thing and trust in the process. If you want to stop wasting

00:06:47.700 your life, saying no will make sure you don't spread yourself too thin. Which brings us to

00:06:51.920 number five, which is don't be a prisoner to your device. I do a youth program called King's Club

00:06:57.040 and I'm always talking to young men. And recently I was talking to one of them about their number

00:07:00.920 one vice. I was like, what's your thing? What's stopping you? What's making life hard? He looks

00:07:05.060 at me, holds out his phone, he shakes it. He said, my phone. Every time I know I got to get something

00:07:09.240 done, I go on my phone and I start scrolling. Two, three, four hours later, I put off all the

00:07:14.340 stuff I know I need to do and I don't get it done. And it occurred to me the reason why is because

00:07:18.900 he doesn't have a plan for his life. He doesn't know what the scrolling is robbing from him

00:07:23.620 because he hasn't built a real plan for a vision for his life. Think of your attention, your focus

00:07:28.640 like a car on the road. If you get stuck in traffic of notifications and apps and doom scrolling on

00:07:34.180 social media, you'll find yourself going nowhere instead of cruising towards your goals. Go turn

00:07:39.220 off all your notifications like right now your attention is way too valuable think about it your

00:07:44.000 focus your energy your productivity it's worth way more than a red jewel notification some person

00:07:49.180 snapchat to you the truth is if you're addicted to your phone your life's just not that interesting

00:07:53.600 go make it interesting go create big plans go have a vision for your life that pulls you forward

00:07:59.000 that scrolling on social media isn't even an option because you're too excited to go create

00:08:03.900 the thing that you see yourself doing in five years just have more fun things scheduled in

00:08:08.260 your calendar and if you're really having a hard time schedule them with other people if you are

00:08:12.360 committed to go to the gym with your buddy i guarantee you're not going to miss going to the

00:08:15.520 gym if it's just you you'll probably skip out just because you want to scroll on social media

00:08:19.340 turning off all notification is the simplest and most effective way to stop wasting your life

00:08:24.100 which brings us to number six which is don't read books study them when i started reading i was so

00:08:30.440 hungry to read books and to get them off my to-do list because people are giving me you got to read

00:08:34.420 this you got to read this you got to read this that i would just speed read these books i didn't

00:08:38.760 write anything down i didn't highlight anything i didn't make comments or anything i was just

00:08:42.460 reading to have read and then it occurred to me that the real value from a book is not the

00:08:47.140 information it's the application it's actually executing the things that you're learning so i

00:08:52.180 started to develop this muscle the jfdi muscle just effing do it which is as soon as i read

00:08:57.400 something actionable in the book i took action even better than that was start to teach other

00:09:02.860 people around me what i was learning why in reading knowing i'm gonna teach i read completely

00:09:08.380 different oftentimes we already know what we should have done we've read that book but did

00:09:12.380 you do the things in the book so my recommendation is figure out where you're stuck in life and only

00:09:18.380 read books that can help you unlock the next skill you have to acquire the belief around the world or

00:09:23.420 implement a habit in your life that'll get you incredible results i call it just in time not just

00:09:28.460 in case. You can recommend a book to me. I'll buy it. It'll probably sit there until I have the need

00:09:33.180 and I go, oh yeah, somebody recommended a book on that topic and then I'll go study it. Same goes

00:09:37.860 for all my information. My YouTube videos, my podcast, resources, courses I buy. I queue them

00:09:42.840 up and I study them when I have the problem, not just because I bought it. Most people read or

00:09:48.280 consume courses or hire a coach just so they can feel good about themselves because the easiest

00:09:52.580 decision to spend money. I call it shelf help. You're just consuming knowledge to put on a shelf

00:09:57.440 to have a badge that you can tell people,

00:09:59.240 I read that book, but are you doing what's in the book?

00:10:02.140 If the answer's no, stop, study, execute.

00:10:05.580 So if you wanna stop wasting your life,

00:10:07.040 take action on the things you learn instantly.

00:10:09.440 Which brings us to number seven,

00:10:10.840 which is don't compare yourself to anyone but yourself.

00:10:14.340 I used to compare myself to people my age,

00:10:17.100 people in my city,

00:10:17.940 people that were more successful than me.

00:10:19.660 And honestly, all it did is made me depressed.

00:10:21.640 I was worried, I was behind, I wasn't moving fast enough,

00:10:24.640 I didn't think big enough.

00:10:25.640 I wasn't that impressive.

00:10:27.180 Nobody should take the time to talk to me.

00:10:29.240 And then it occurred to me one day

00:10:30.580 that the only person that I'm actually competing against

00:10:33.680 is me from yesterday, me from last year.

00:10:36.620 Because over time, I'm not anybody else.

00:10:38.980 I don't have their brain, I don't have their body,

00:10:40.940 I don't have their relationships,

00:10:42.040 I don't have their environment, their situation,

00:10:44.040 but guess what, they don't have mine.

00:10:45.340 And the only thing I can do is take who I am

00:10:47.860 and ask myself honestly, am I getting better?

00:10:51.080 Am I focused on the things that I can control?

00:10:53.640 And if I can get 1% better every day, that compounds like mad over a year, over a decade,

00:11:00.820 change your life.

00:11:02.240 And comparing yourself to somebody else will just steal your confidence.

00:11:06.420 Think of your experience as a Spotify playlist.

00:11:08.660 Comparing to someone else ignores the value of your own unique taste, who you are, what

00:11:13.540 you love.

00:11:14.320 Focus on curating your own playlist that resonates with you.

00:11:17.540 I always say to people, why would you compare your chapter three to somebody else's chapter

00:11:21.960 27?

00:11:22.840 I've been in business for 27 years.

00:11:25.380 If you're just starting off six months, a year,

00:11:27.500 three years in, why would you compare yourself to me?

00:11:29.880 If anything, know that I've been doing this for 27 years

00:11:32.500 and when you're at 27 years

00:11:33.800 because you're watching this or you're listening to this,

00:11:35.680 I expect you to be way further along

00:11:37.540 because you have access to people

00:11:38.980 that I didn't have access to

00:11:40.300 and the biggest thing you can do is just be yourself.

00:11:42.680 It's the most unique thing that you have.

00:11:45.120 Everything that you're insecure about

00:11:46.440 is what makes you, you.

00:11:48.060 You may not like the sound of your voice,

00:11:49.920 the way your nose is shaped,

00:11:51.100 the way your ears are shaped.

00:11:52.160 You might think that you're not very smart,

00:11:53.860 but I'm telling you, if you lean into it,

00:11:55.920 that's what makes you you.

00:11:57.680 It's what makes you memorable.

00:11:59.420 Trying to pretend that's not who you are

00:12:01.020 or trying to compare yourself to somebody else

00:12:02.480 or be somebody else is just gonna steal all the potential

00:12:05.520 of you standing out in this world.

00:12:07.260 And we live in a world where you wanna be unique,

00:12:09.680 you wanna be authentic, so take advantage of it.

00:12:12.020 Those are seven things I quit to not waste my life.

00:12:14.620 But if you wanna learn the 40 brutal truths

00:12:16.600 I wish I knew in my 20s, click the link

00:12:18.500 and I'll see you on the other side.

Dan Martell - November 13, 2024

Stop Wasting Your Life - 7 Things I Quit to Go From Broke to Millionaire

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