Dan Martell - Watch This If You’re Stuck In Your Life ｜ Ed Mylett Interview

00:00:00.000 I had no self-confidence.

00:00:01.760 I didn't have a real picture of what success looked like.

00:00:04.880 People are like, what are your big dreams and goals?

00:00:06.480 I'm like, I have no idea.

00:00:10.440 If you're stuck in your life, it's because there's a lack of momentum in it.

00:00:15.240 Momentum takes average, ordinary people and makes them appear to be superhuman.

00:00:19.280 You've taught me some things that I've never seen anywhere.

00:00:22.840 We're trying to build these neural connections, then we're trying to code them with myelin.

00:00:26.160 So the more specific, the more repetitive, the more it's an actual change.

00:00:30.000 In our lives, we are constantly stacking things that we think disqualifies.

00:00:34.140 My bankruptcy, my business failure, this mistake I made.

00:00:37.280 Nothing could be further from the truth.

00:00:38.440 You are most qualified to help the person or people you used to be.

00:00:43.620 That was powerful.

00:00:48.960 Ed, thank you so much for being on the show.

00:00:51.700 It's great to be here.

00:00:52.480 Thanks for coming over to the house.

00:00:53.480 This is really fun because you have been incredibly helpful to me.

00:00:58.360 and I wanted to have you on here to see if how I could take the things you've taught me and serve

00:01:06.240 them. Cause this is awesome. This is my jam. Um, by the way, let me say something about you. I love

00:01:12.000 that about you. I think the reason that you and I connect so deeply and so well is that your heart

00:01:17.720 to serve people. And you know, you think about all of that first and all of the financial stuff

00:01:24.160 is very secondary to you sometimes to a fault same here and i connect with that i resonate with it

00:01:30.620 and i think that's why you're messaging your book buy back your time everything you've been doing

00:01:35.320 is doing so well because people sense your intentions about it i appreciate that i love

00:01:39.340 your intentions and your ability to deliver well the first thing i wanted to ask is everybody can

00:01:45.160 go online to learn more about your personal story and the massive success you've had and you know

00:01:50.120 I've been to a few of your homes and it's just incredible. That's why I'm, I'm really inspired

00:01:54.580 by the, the life, but who did you have to become as a person to achieve this?

00:02:01.380 Uh, certainly not who I was. That's for sure. Well, I would say this. I said, well, I always

00:02:06.040 grew up. Um, I think I've always, I'll brag about one thing. I think I've always been a pretty

00:02:10.700 kindhearted person. I've always loved and cared about people. So I think that part of me was

00:02:16.160 foundationally a really good thing even before you started working with the boys yeah even before i

00:02:20.880 worked at the orphanage i think i was a pretty decent human yeah but about everything else had

00:02:26.640 to change i had no self-confidence i didn't have a real picture of what success looked like

00:02:32.400 um even even as something is you know seemingly insignificant of like having a vision and a dream

00:02:38.560 for what i wanted like i come from a really wonderful family everybody knows most people

00:02:43.120 know my dad was an alcoholic and a drug addict when i was young but my family is not material

00:02:48.320 oriented it's not even really achievement oriented we didn't take vacations as a family anything like

00:02:53.840 that my family is just about loving one another and being a good family member being a good human

00:02:58.320 being and being generous so even remember when i got into like the business world people like what

00:03:02.640 are your big dreams and goals i'm like i have no idea and i would literally and it's not a bad thing

00:03:07.680 i would find someone i kind of modeled their life at first you know like i'll test run i remember

00:03:13.680 one of my first that fits how does that feel like one of my first heroes was a guy hector was his

00:03:18.400 name and he lived on balboa on the ocean and then he had a golf house out in the desert i didn't

00:03:24.560 golf you know but i'm like well that looks like a pretty good combo i could live on the ocean and

00:03:28.720 then and then lo and behold here's my life i got a desert house and ocean houses and islands and

00:03:33.120 and all this other stuff but really i just modeled the dream so everything from my ability to

00:03:37.900 communicate to self-confidence to even having a vision for what i wanted i was devoid of any of

00:03:42.640 those things one of the uh i i went out to my audience to ask them if you could have this

00:03:47.980 conversation what would you ask and uh lady kelly petterson who actually was at your event 0.76

00:03:54.220 in december uh october november the one the one in um with pete vargas and them uh she asked

00:04:01.360 do you ever deal with imposter syndrome yes and how do you deal with it at this level

00:04:07.460 yeah I still do um I've had some situations where I was you know I'm coaching somebody who's doing

00:04:13.420 something really really significant maybe they've run like a big country or something like that and

00:04:16.940 I'm like why in the world are they listening to me right now I've literally had those experiences

00:04:21.440 I had a I won't say which one but I had a I feel okay about give you I'll give everybody

00:04:26.220 permission to feel it one of the people that I had I have worked with was a former president

00:04:31.840 and um he was telling me that his first week in office he was they were in a pretty stressful

00:04:38.180 meeting and he leaned back in his seat kind of like just to collect his thoughts and he looked

00:04:42.740 and over his shoulder was a picture of Abraham Lincoln and it dawned on him in that moment what

00:04:48.600 in the world am I doing sitting here right now you know this is this is like Lincoln's been here you

00:04:54.600 know, Kennedy's been here, Reagan, whoever you admire, right? He goes, it was just like an out

00:04:58.900 of body experience. He goes, I literally sort of floated for a minute. Like I'm actually sitting

00:05:03.080 here and I'm the actual president. So even somebody at that level had that experience.

00:05:08.120 And I have that happen sometimes. I remind myself, I had a great conversation. I was young. I just

00:05:12.980 use this word about you with Wayne Dyer. He wrote a book called the power of intention. And I met

00:05:17.520 him when he was writing the book. I was running on the beach. I won an incentive trip in our

00:05:23.020 financial company the first trip i ever won to qualify yeah and it was in maui i'd never been

00:05:28.020 there before and i'm got up no one exercised back in those days i was one of the first ever like

00:05:31.800 business athlete people that wasn't a thing well no one did it i go to the gyms on trips no one

00:05:36.780 was there okay and i read a book called the corporate athlete by a guy named grappel and i'm

00:05:41.500 like okay i'll be a corporate athlete a business athlete so i'm up running early before the sun's

00:05:45.720 up on the beach in maui this dude's running towards me we both have sony walkmans on

00:05:49.460 you know like listen to cassettes that's how long ago it was this guy's bald he's got like a hairy

00:05:54.600 back and he's getting closer and closer i'm like i don't want to bump into this dude's sweat you 0.98

00:05:58.700 know yeah and as he gets closer i'm like oh my gosh it's wayne dyer and he runs by me the other

00:06:03.740 way and i go i took my walkman i go dr dyer you changed my life and he has a deep voice like me

00:06:10.040 and i'll never forget he turns around and looks at me he goes i doubt that i bet you changed your

00:06:14.560 life but how did I help you and he starts to walk towards me and I spent 90 minutes sitting on the

00:06:20.620 beach with Wayne Dyer watching the sun come up and when we were done we became friends and but

00:06:25.920 when we were done he goes Ed I think you're going to change the world I to this day I have no idea

00:06:30.460 whether or not he said that to everybody I don't know but he made me believe it and he goes and

00:06:35.560 it's not because of your big brain and it's not because you're a great communicator he goes it's

00:06:39.960 because of your intentions i can just tell you intend to really do great things and good for

00:06:44.740 humans and he goes do me a favor never link your confidence to your abilities which is very foreign 1.00

00:06:50.880 because in baseball or when i mean technical skill yeah he goes um you'll always be chasing your tail

00:06:56.440 you'll never be good enough he goes when you're under pressure you're worrying he goes i just want

00:07:00.880 you to focus on your intentions get your get your confidence from your you intend to make a

00:07:05.240 difference you intend to serve you and tend to do right by people just right now before we started

00:07:09.720 I said, I'm going to go over there really quick.

00:07:11.680 You see how I disappeared?

00:07:12.680 I went over there.

00:07:13.660 I said a little quick prayer.

00:07:15.200 I reminded myself of my intentions to help people today.

00:07:18.840 And I sit here pretty confident, not in my ability necessarily, but in my intent to serve.

00:07:25.120 That's all you can bring to the table is your intentions.

00:07:27.080 So most of my life, my confidence has come from a trilogy.

00:07:30.340 In the power of one more, I call it a trilogy.

00:07:33.020 But it's my faith, my intentions, and then my ability to execute is third for me.

00:07:39.720 every single time. So my faith, I've got a God who loves me, that believes in me, that's given

00:07:43.780 me great giftedness, that put me here to make a difference. And my intent is to do well. My intent

00:07:49.620 is to contribute. My intent is to serve. I got a lot of confidence from that. And then my ability

00:07:54.400 to execute third. I got a lot of ability, but sometimes you'll find yourself in a circumstance

00:07:59.080 that may exceed your capacity, may exceed your preparation, right? What do you do in those

00:08:04.820 moments? What are you going to rely on then, right? At the highest level in sports, when I coach

00:08:09.200 athletes it's all predicated on ability because everybody was the best player on their high school

00:08:14.700 team they're all the best player on their college team they're all the best so at that level the

00:08:20.300 separator's ability no the separator is not ability the separator is the ability to find

00:08:24.540 your best performance at any given time and for me that's faith and intention so when you unpack

00:08:29.920 that i'm just going to summarize it for everybody listening it's beautiful because the imposter

00:08:35.660 syndrome may start to creep up, but you just have to go back to intention. I may not be

00:08:39.560 the president today. I may not be the billionaire. I may not be as skilled as the person I'm helping,

00:08:45.440 but I can go back to the core of who I know I am and why I'm showing up for this moment.

00:08:50.360 And that is undeniable. It, by the way, and it becomes very easy to escape it.

00:08:56.740 Most things in your life that you have, if one thing I told you today, I used this term with

00:09:01.180 you today we're working together I said you're so self-aware you had said a thing about clinical

00:09:07.120 clinical yeah and I go that's the exact that's a better word than I was using to describe something

00:09:11.860 that you need to work on you're very very self-aware same thing when there's a problem

00:09:15.960 or a thought that doesn't serve you awareness makes it lose its power over you so part of your

00:09:22.720 brain when it when you're not in coherence so under pressure if we're gonna get tech yeah let's

00:09:28.640 go okay under pressure what i work with my athletes on is not lowering their heart rate although i

00:09:34.000 think a lower heart rate is a better for performance than higher but the truth is that's not really

00:09:38.140 what messes us up what messes us up is heart rate variability where your heart's just at different

00:09:43.680 beats the variability quotient literally causes almost like a lobotomy for you when your heart

00:09:49.260 rate's racing like crazy it's very difficult to think and perform clearly so one of the things

00:09:55.760 I'm constantly working on is just calming the variability, which is through breathing,

00:10:00.140 which is through intention, which is through gratitude. And one of the powers is when I'm

00:10:04.540 just aware I'm doing it, the thought loses its power over me. The anxiety loses its power over

00:10:10.000 me. Once I'm aware of something, its power is reduced. And then I can use the techniques I have

00:10:14.240 to reduce my heart rate variability so that I perform at a high level. So awareness is a really

00:10:19.260 huge thing for me just when I know I'm doing it. So if anybody's having that imposter syndrome

00:10:24.320 kick in just be aware of it get separate from it see it go back to intention and control your

00:10:29.660 breathing and control your breathing one of the main things i work with with my athletes on is

00:10:33.040 breathing and it's rhythmic breathing that's a conversation for another day yeah but when you

00:10:37.460 can control your breathing rhythmic breathing in and out so it's smooth rhythmic breathing

00:10:42.760 and you actually breathe from your heart because the electrical power in your heart's about 50

00:10:48.460 times greater than your brain what begins to happen if you do that for about a minute breathing

00:10:57.660 from your heart heart's so important because it's where all the electrical power comes in our body

00:11:03.080 it's why we say i've heard there's intelligence in the heart what's that intelligence in the

00:11:06.780 intelligence all of it is centered there so give you an example your heart is sending messages to

00:11:10.940 your brain so when you hear guys use the word coherence oh coherence really means is lower

00:11:16.600 heart rate variability and there's a coherence between your brain and your heart working together

00:11:20.400 i didn't know we were going to go this deep but it's one of the things i work on for performance

00:11:23.880 with people so one of the very basic things is just to do very rhythmic breathing that begins

00:11:29.280 to get that under control that's why like when we say i love you with all my heart right when we

00:11:34.740 hold a child to us we don't hold them next to our knee or our shoulder we hold them next to our

00:11:39.620 heart to the chest so when you're in these situations really faith and intention is from

00:11:45.780 the heart so then i'll control my breathing from my chest from my heart and that combination mixed

00:11:53.160 in with a little bit of gratitude for the moment i told that president i said that comes up again

00:11:57.120 control your breathing focus on your intentions focus on your faith and then this may sound silly

00:12:03.080 because everyone in personal development throws around gratitude gratitude's just a kicker

00:12:07.220 gratitude's the kicker it's an amplifier yeah yeah and i just go i'm grateful to be in this moment

00:12:11.540 I'm grateful for this challenge it's not the main thing you can't go I'm grateful and you're like

00:12:15.880 I'm grateful it's three and two two outs of energy I'm not grateful you're terrified but if you can

00:12:19.860 have the other things in place gratitude is like the kicker to come from your heart so it's just

00:12:25.340 all little stuff that I do but it's huge when I'm coaching athletes or peak performers or anybody in

00:12:30.080 life even my son in his golf game my daughter before she takes a big test at Clemson I'm like

00:12:34.840 let's get centered we've got God's got our back our intentions are to do our best we've done all

00:12:39.720 of our preparation let's do our rhythmic breathing from our heart and our chest let's be grateful for

00:12:44.380 the opportunity we're here and we have the money to be able to afford to go to this school this 0.97

00:12:48.560 amazing moment now let's execute and kick some ass it's it's fun for me because you've taught 0.95

00:12:53.780 me so many things that i'm allowing god to to kind of push me in directions and he wants me to ask 0.99

00:13:01.340 you about faith but also this the energy because there's a lot of people say i'm not religious but

00:13:07.500 i believe in energy and one of the things that i've loved about your message is that you you

00:13:12.880 have a faith but you also believe in the quantum big time like it sounds for a lot of people it

00:13:18.280 doesn't make sense how are they the same thing if you had to unpack that for somebody or share your

00:13:22.720 own story of like where did that it sounded like you know the you know god was always part of your

00:13:27.640 life but maybe the other side came in or did it come at the same time that's an interesting

00:13:32.040 question i don't know what came first probably my faith came first but so i wrote about that in the

00:13:36.600 book a chapter on it and i was happy the chapter on faith in the book took me as long to write as

00:13:42.340 the rest of the rest of the book because i was so concerned about you know if i was too faith-based

00:13:47.720 i was being disrespectful to people of other faiths that i admire people of faith in general

00:13:51.980 and then if i went too sciency the faith people wouldn't like it if i went too faithy the science

00:13:57.700 i just went you know what forget it i'm just gonna write what i actually believe and that's

00:14:00.960 just gonna have to stand on its own this is who i am this is what i think and so i'm a i i'm a

00:14:05.680 christian and so in my case i have a savior which is jesus christ that's the foundation of my life

00:14:10.480 it's the creator of the universe is god having said that though i believe that there's a quantum

00:14:15.280 field where there's energy and vibration i just think it was came from a creator so the the notion

00:14:21.180 that there is an energy to me is actually just it's almost impossible for someone to believe

00:14:24.760 silly you feel energy right now yeah there's a vibrational frequency when you have a thought

00:14:29.640 that you repeat it vibrates at a higher and higher frequency you end up drawing it into your 0.97

00:14:32.860 world. So the idea that you don't sense energy, one thing I'm very intentional about is I know

00:14:38.960 I'm always making people feel something. Most people are oblivious to this fact. You're always

00:14:45.040 making people feel something. So go back to intention. I'm just slightly more intentional

00:14:50.680 about what you're going to feel and experience when you're in my presence. That's vibrational

00:14:54.980 frequency. So truth vibrates at the highest frequency. So the highest vibrational frequency

00:14:59.960 is actually your own truth and your own faith.

00:15:02.580 They're correlated.

00:15:03.320 The Holy Spirit, to me, is an energy, is a sense, is a vibrational frequency.

00:15:08.520 And so they're correlated for me.

00:15:10.980 They're not the same thing.

00:15:12.220 They're correlated.

00:15:13.240 If you said, I get to have one or the other, I will take my faith 100% of the time.

00:15:16.840 But to understand that there's this field where I can have a knowing and a zone I'm in

00:15:22.860 and a vibrational frequency and a depth of wisdom and dimension to me that I don't have

00:15:28.660 without it is silly to me and so i'm a big energy guy i make business deals based on energy

00:15:35.200 confirmed by prayer when i give a speech yeah when i give a speech it's all about the energy

00:15:41.540 that i'm putting out confirmed by the prayer and the blessing and hopefully the holy spirit gives

00:15:45.380 me the words to use so these two things together are awesome stuff and one doesn't they're not

00:15:51.520 mutually exclusive no and i think sometimes people that are really devout in their faith

00:15:54.760 They're like, well, is that a you-centered thing or a God-centered thing?

00:15:57.340 It's always a God-centered thing for me.

00:15:59.640 But that's like saying that there's an ocean right here we're looking at right now that's beautiful, is it not?

00:16:05.060 And it's making this noise behind us.

00:16:06.940 Do you not feel an energy when you're closer to the water?

00:16:10.340 Think about that, everybody.

00:16:11.280 We've been talking about it for the last few days.

00:16:12.320 Most people will tell you, man, I don't know what happens when I'm getting around the water or the energy.

00:16:16.180 I feel more at peace.

00:16:17.500 That's because there's an energy coming from it.

00:16:19.580 Now, who created that ocean?

00:16:21.440 You're up to your own conclusions.

00:16:22.660 For me, there's an all-knowing God in heaven that created that ocean that I feel an energy and a peace from.

00:16:29.800 So that's maybe the best description you can ever have in the real world.

00:16:33.060 When I look at that ocean, most things go, thank you, God.

00:16:35.400 It's so beautiful, so majestic.

00:16:37.720 But there's an energy.

00:16:39.060 Ask anybody who surfs.

00:16:40.280 There's an energy.

00:16:41.780 Right now, we feel the energy of the ocean, right?

00:16:44.300 If we leave my house right now, because it's about 100 yards away,

00:16:47.180 the closer we get to that water the more we feel the vibrational freak we see the energy from it

00:16:53.500 by the way i want this clip because that was really good right there

00:16:56.100 clip that that's for social yeah well i mean but you you brought up something like something that

00:17:04.240 you do so beautifully at is you talked about your intention about how you make people feel

00:17:09.100 and one of several things you've taught me that this had a huge impact on my life but

00:17:14.500 will on many generations was I don't want to get emotional about it but

00:17:20.100 the skill of telling my boys about them right you you tell people about you you know and I

00:17:30.540 literally started that practice a while ago and if we call them right now they'd be like I don't

00:17:35.080 want to hear it I don't want I was like let me tell you about you you know and I'll take them

00:17:38.820 separate and they say they don't want to but then they go all right they do yeah and like can you

00:17:45.360 unpack that for people because i think for me the business stuff's awesome but wow your ability to

00:17:52.180 to to because i had my life shifted when a guy named brian showed up as a teenager and just

00:17:58.120 saw something in me that i didn't see in myself well especially with your upbringing that's a big

00:18:02.740 big deal it was everything and it's just available to every person to do that yeah could you talk

00:18:09.000 about that yeah i'm writing a book right now called let me tell you about you so are you really i'm

00:18:13.540 writing i'm gonna leave something out of it i want to leave something for the book however

00:18:16.800 if you think back in your life and i said to you for a second i want you to think about the person

00:18:22.800 who believed in you the most or made you feel the most special when you're a little boy or a little

00:18:26.500 girl hopefully there's somebody some people there isn't but for most of us there's that grandparent

00:18:32.020 or a mom or a dad or a coach or a teacher they made you feel like all your life when you're a

00:18:40.080 little boy or a little girl there is this little voice telling you i was born to do something great

00:18:43.780 i was supposed to do something great with my life and then from the minute we get out into the world

00:18:49.320 that noise that whisper starts getting more and more faint for most people by the time they're

00:18:56.440 a teenager or 20 years old, they forgot. They don't hear it anymore. And every once in a while

00:19:02.280 when you were a kid, maybe there was one person, they would whisper it back to you. They'd go,

00:19:08.380 you're amazing. You're special. I love you. You're so fast. You're so strong. You're so funny. You're

00:19:14.200 so handsome. And if I asked you right now, anybody listening to this or watching it,

00:19:18.240 who is that person for you? Have they passed away or are they still here? Close your eyes

00:19:23.400 and picture the precious face of that person.

00:19:26.800 For me, it would be my grandfather, my papa.

00:19:29.560 For most people, if I made you do it a while,

00:19:31.760 you'd probably start crying.

00:19:33.320 You'd probably start to get emotional.

00:19:35.260 And if you're lucky in your life,

00:19:38.180 there are three or four of those people in your life.

00:19:40.820 Maybe one.

00:19:42.360 And you know what?

00:19:43.400 They hold a special place in your heart

00:19:45.880 that no one else holds.

00:19:47.560 Maybe it's your spouse right now,

00:19:48.740 which would be beautiful if that was the case, right?

00:19:50.400 and so because that's true i i realized in my life what if i could be that person for hundreds

00:19:57.780 of people and all they did was tell you the truth about you they didn't lie or exaggerate they told

00:20:03.800 you about you so it's wonderful to go you're amazing honey and it's kind of hollow but if

00:20:08.960 you say you're amazing honey because and then you link that to a natural gift or talent that that

00:20:15.820 person kind of intuitively knows they have whoo you got it let me show you how it works wayne

00:20:21.900 dyer i'm sitting on the beach ed you're going to change the world basically you're going to do

00:20:26.640 something great with your life he barely knew me and he said and let me tell you why it's not because

00:20:31.660 you're that smart even though you're smart it's not your voice it's that heart of yours it's your

00:20:36.120 intentions that's one of the few things with my lack of confidence i believe to be true about me

00:20:40.940 I am a kind person I opened up by saying it to you as a matter of fact today before I told you

00:20:45.920 the Wayne Dyer story one thing I know you just do it so naturally now so like man he said something

00:20:51.420 true about me and then linked it to me being either happy or successful and so in our lives

00:20:57.200 if we will study somebody every human being I believe is born or develops one or two or three

00:21:04.520 really special talents or gifts it could be their kindness their physical beauty their intellect

00:21:09.260 their their humor their nurturing skills problem solving ability their clinical abilities right

00:21:15.420 their writing abilities their speaking abilities their their um their their touch whatever it might

00:21:21.460 be and they kind of know they have these one or two things about them and so when you go i see

00:21:28.200 this in you and this is why you're going to be happy or successful that's what great business

00:21:32.740 leaders do you know collins calls it putting people in the right seats on the bus it's way

00:21:37.280 more than that it's saying you're amazing at writing code and because you're so amazing at it

00:21:43.400 you're going to do something great here you go I am amazing at writing the linking part that I

00:21:47.320 think people miss it's the link you can give a it's what I'm taking away and I've seen you do

00:21:51.860 this and it's inspired me in a big way is it has to be unique to them that they know you're paying

00:21:56.940 attention that's right and you got to link it to their desire that they know inherently is in their

00:22:03.140 heart that they could accomplish when you're a little boy or a little girl you and I had different

00:22:07.120 upbringings in most people so you didn't get the benefit of this most you watch a little kid if

00:22:11.480 they're with their mom or dad they'll go daddy watch daddy watch mama watch you ever seen a

00:22:16.180 child do that my kids do that before they do anything they daddy watch yeah what they're

00:22:20.540 saying is that see me see me i don't want to be invisible see me see me and human beings most of

00:22:28.520 us at some age it's just we're invisible and even our friends hey bro hey bro hey bro there's no

00:22:34.820 depth there's no dimension to it there's nothing beneath the surface instead of saying man you're

00:22:41.040 amazing i told uh my good friend we were talking about richard cabesa yeah i was with him yesterday

00:22:45.700 and we were in a little group and i said and i did it for him in front of him so let me tell

00:22:49.680 you about him and i said this dude and i'll give you the story this is gnarly my dog

00:22:56.340 crapped all over a room the other night one of my two pomeranians i mean just destroyed this room

00:23:02.100 and it was super late at night it was like two three in the morning and this may seem super silly

00:23:07.840 but my wife and i went we'll get it in the morning it was like in a back room in our house

00:23:13.260 we'll get it in the morning so we go to sleep i wake up to go in there and it's done it's gone

00:23:20.900 he's staying in my guest house anyway he got up in the middle of the night and spent two hours

00:23:27.000 and cleaned up this entire room of my he's just the most thoughtful people ask me why are you

00:23:31.620 he's so thoughtful he's so kind he wants to serve and so we're in a group that next day and I go

00:23:37.020 let me just tell you about this dude because he's so funny he's so funny I'm like dude let me tell

00:23:41.180 you about him there's more he's so kind man he's so generous he's so giving and he got all watery

00:23:47.460 eyed right because that's the truth about him the surface thing is he's funny the beautiful thing

00:23:53.680 about him was this other thing and we're super close because maybe 500 times I've told him about

00:23:58.800 him and linked it to something that he's doing and so I just feel like that's one of the things

00:24:02.960 in my life I've been really really of like maybe a very few handful of things I'm good at doing

00:24:08.380 it's seeing someone's giftedness seeing someone's talent seeing someone's truth and man do they feel

00:24:15.620 like the light is really on them when you do that the surface compliments of you're awesome you're

00:24:20.380 amazing you're incredible that means nothing that means especially if it can be used for anybody

00:24:25.040 right it's almost like if the sentence could be said to another person and it land it's not

00:24:29.520 specific enough it's not if you if you pictured everybody's got a flashing sign on their forehead

00:24:34.220 that just said make me feel special make me feel amazing tell me something unique about me

00:24:40.460 to me if you just pictured that they just it's literally what's flashing you just did it we're

00:24:46.240 just talking about it right you just did this he sits down in a meeting you're like let me tell

00:24:51.180 he's the best in the world at this right and by the way it's true so it resonates so the people

00:24:57.580 that you do that with you'll be connected to them in a way that maybe a handful of human beings in

00:25:01.500 their entire life are one of the other things ed that i absolutely admire about you is your drive

00:25:10.400 to serve others to you know like you kind of came into this social media influence space but you

00:25:18.180 didn't have to like like you yeah well I appreciate that but like you you had the success you built

00:25:24.080 the businesses and all that stuff and you came back and I remember we were together and you

00:25:28.920 shared a story about how important that is to serve other people in spite of your fear and I

00:25:35.540 know there's a lot of people watching that are starting in their business early days and they

00:25:40.580 know they should be picking up the phone and doing the cold calls they know they should be doing some

00:25:44.200 as they know they should be going door to door knock and they know they should be asking for

00:25:47.980 the order, but their anxiety is stopping them because what I believe is they haven't connected

00:25:54.220 their service to service, their product to impact. And you shared a story that was just so moving

00:26:02.720 for me to just, to me, it's like, you reminded me, I got to do more of that. When I was working

00:26:07.120 on the books, like I got to, I got to ask for support. Like I didn't do it. And I let people

00:26:11.540 down and i don't know if you remember this story but it was um about a couple in the early days

00:26:17.540 i'll never forget it yeah yeah well i and the reason i just interrupted you is because it's

00:26:22.100 a painful story to tell and i want to get it out of the way but it's maybe the most important thing

00:26:26.400 you could ask me what you here's what i would say to you learn from my experiences of the good and

00:26:32.880 the bad and this one i'll share with you is the worst of the worst thing i've done which is that

00:26:40.260 i was i it's it's not only what you will do if you serve somebody with your product or your

00:26:47.480 company or mission it's what might happen to them if you don't sometimes we only focus on hey if i

00:26:53.180 get this deal closed they'll be better and i'll make some money but what if you don't like what

00:26:57.900 if you had the cure for cancer and you just didn't share it with somebody right well i i was in the

00:27:01.980 insurance business i had helped a lot of families but there's just this i had had a couple rejections

00:27:06.800 recently so one of the these beautiful people's homes i won't say their names but they had a

00:27:12.360 child and they were pregnant and um i was a little down a little bit tired and a little bit down that

00:27:18.340 night and the normal me they gave me some resistance let us think about it and the normal

00:27:23.540 stuff and normally i'd be like no no no no here we go and i'd already had a couple rejections i

00:27:28.440 and it really was my ego i was down about me my performance was conditional on how i felt

00:27:35.760 and for most people what we say the most highest form of love is unconditional love well the great

00:27:41.940 performers in life their performance is unconditional unconditional what the score of

00:27:46.600 the game is unconditional about how they're feeling you watch a good football player yeah

00:27:50.900 you're great when you're up 23 to 6 or when it's close what if you're down 41 to 7 is your

00:27:55.000 performance conditional are you still hustling as hard you still trying as hard you still hitting

00:27:58.940 them as hard so my performance was conditional and this beautiful family i kind of let them put

00:28:07.080 me off i didn't do what i knew i was supposed to do to say no listen brother you don't have any

00:28:12.420 insurance you have a child and a pregnant wife and if god forbid something happened to you their

00:28:17.540 life would be ruined and i'm here now and we could i didn't do it i let him delay me

00:28:23.060 and i'd let him delay me because of my own ego and for me not thinking what happens if i don't

00:28:31.160 help them and so we had set an appointment up to get together a few days later and i'll fast

00:28:36.900 forward because we're on a podcast but i never got to meet with them again because there was a

00:28:41.760 car accident that happened and both mother and father's life was lost and uh baby lived and they

00:28:51.180 had another child and I left that family those two children with no financial means whatsoever

00:28:58.100 I left them without protection I left them without their neighborhood anymore the home they were

00:29:05.160 living in and they were forced to be raised by in-laws that weren't doing very well either whose

00:29:11.560 lives weren't very well adjusted and I really harmed those children and I harmed the legacy

00:29:17.420 of the two loving parents by not getting them to do something that was in their best interest

00:29:21.620 because I was down because the truth is in hindsight I was a little down I was a little

00:29:27.220 tired I wasn't feeling it the conditions weren't great and I let that slip just a little bit and

00:29:34.060 here I am at 51 years old and there's not very many days that go by that I don't have some guilt

00:29:41.500 in my heart that i let that happen to that family and uh it's one of those invisible things no one

00:29:48.340 would ever know i mean if i didn't tell anybody it wasn't something i did that didn't work out

00:29:53.320 it was something i didn't do that should have worked out and had i done the right thing those

00:29:58.100 precious babies would have had college funds those precious kids could have kept their neighborhood 0.99

00:30:01.800 and their school all they had to do is sign they just all i had to do is get them to sign the

00:30:05.960 application and I didn't do it and I'll be honest with you I will carry that forever I can't undo

00:30:13.620 that I can't undo it I will carry it forever and it is the good part is I think I've helped

00:30:19.740 millions of other people on a lot of days of my life where the conditions weren't great where I

00:30:25.060 didn't feel like it I was down I didn't need to I was rich I was this that experience was formative

00:30:31.620 for me because I won't I my endeavor is to never have that happen again I don't like how this feels

00:30:38.580 this is by the way more than 25 years ago yeah and here I am in my living room talking to you

00:30:43.600 about it and I feel shame about it because I'm I'm better than that and and those that family

00:30:51.980 deserved better than that from me and I didn't give it to them so it sounds at that moment

00:30:57.980 shaped you as a as somebody that could achieve though it's a defining moment in my life you can

00:31:04.120 never say it's not about you because it's but it became a lot less about me i can't say that it's

00:31:09.800 you know helping people is a selfish thing for me it's selfish because i love how i feel about me

00:31:15.220 when i do it it's like giving to others it's like who's this really for it's i get a lot of

00:31:18.960 significance out of doing it and man do i feel horrible with the thought that i could have and

00:31:24.900 i didn't and i already have one major could have and i did it in my life and i don't want a long

00:31:29.740 list of those i was not born to have a bunch of i could have and i didn't i should have and i

00:31:35.180 didn't my ego was too big or i was too scared most people with their dreams are cost because

00:31:41.440 of their ego or they're afraid and i don't know if that night it was my ego because i was down

00:31:47.100 or i was afraid they were going to reject me and the previous two people had and i just couldn't

00:31:51.060 handle another rejection but whatever that was that night cost them tremendously but what i take

00:31:58.380 away is that created a sense of drive and desire to achieve in your life and it's taught you some

00:32:06.080 skills like you've taught me some things that i've never seen anywhere like i mean and i don't even

00:32:12.520 know what what because i know you've never shared this publicly but you know even just the way you

00:32:16.820 do achievement and goal setting and processing, you know, and there's, there's some deep stuff

00:32:22.280 like nuance, but powerful around standards and rewards. But the visualization one was

00:32:28.260 what I never heard anybody talk about around, like people talk about visualization, but

00:32:32.080 you were making us rewind it, change the cut. Like, and you mentioned, you know, a few different

00:32:37.220 places where you're inspired around this. Could you unpack that? Cause like, I've been doing this

00:32:41.100 for a long time, 20 some years of personal development, and I'd never had anybody share

00:32:45.200 it that way about how we do some of our visualization the colors and the music and i'll give some of

00:32:50.720 them but i want to keep some yeah exactly this is what you do but what i will say is that most

00:32:55.500 people don't visualize what they visualize so when you ask them hey do you visualize like oh yeah i

00:33:00.360 visualize and then i'll say okay so what are you looking at and they can't even tell you where the

00:33:04.760 camera is for example a visualization is you're seeing something so it went back for me i was

00:33:08.620 playing baseball and i got hurt and the guy goes we're going to visualize you hitting line drive

00:33:12.700 up the middle because you're trying to rehab yeah i was rehabbing getting better and and he and he

00:33:17.900 goes he goes did you see it i go yeah i hit a line drive to me he goes okay good where was the camera

00:33:21.420 i go what he goes where's the camera in your mind i go i don't know what what are you talking about

00:33:26.920 because you just said you visualized you visualize right i go uh he goes where's the camera he goes

00:33:32.100 ed is the camera over the center field like are you watching it on tv and it's going over the

00:33:36.520 picture and watching you in the batter's box is that the camera or is it you in the batter's box

00:33:40.660 Looking out at the picture or is it you in the on-deck circle watching the whole thing happen? I went I don't know

00:33:46.180 He goes then you didn't visualize it matters. I went. Oh

00:33:49.340 So because by the way, we're trying to build these new neural connections

00:33:52.980 Then we're trying to coat them with myelin so the more specific the more repetitive the more it's an actual change

00:33:58.660 So he goes pick the camera angle. I go

00:34:01.480 It's me in the batter's box. He goes, okay now we can visualize and then it went all the way down to

00:34:06.860 where's the ball can you see is the pitcher left or right-handed I'm like I don't know

00:34:11.040 he goes how do you not know but no one knows and then we would break it down all the way to where

00:34:15.720 I could see he goes can you see the release point he's right-handed it's above his right ear okay

00:34:19.920 good and then the ball would come in can you see the stitches rotating can you slow it down

00:34:23.420 when you're in the batter's box can you see the bat hitting the ball I go no he goes now see it

00:34:27.340 see the bat hit the ball now the stitches should be rotating back the other way now and it was that

00:34:34.000 specific. And then with a ball would go right over his right ear. And so I got to the point

00:34:39.440 where, man, I could see this in a very specific visualization. And then he would have me go speed

00:34:45.360 it up, do it in fast motion. Now do it in slow motion. Hey, make it black and white, make it

00:34:52.140 color. And so what's happening is, is I'm, I'm, I'm doing, I'm creating all kinds of new pathways

00:34:58.480 by seeing the same thing over and over and over again and when we do that now we've actually

00:35:04.620 started to rewire ourselves and so what you experienced that i'm not going to cover on the

00:35:08.880 show is i can teach people how to do that in a very hyper focused way in about any area of their

00:35:16.140 life to where their mind now becomes a weapon in their favor and here's why that's important

00:35:20.720 the things we fear in our life and worry about we visualize those with great specificity it's

00:35:27.740 almost like a mantra in their head it is a pattern and it's a loop and you run it and then you do it

00:35:33.920 over and then you'll slow it down and then you'll add emotion to it and sometimes on bad days you'll

00:35:39.340 make it black and white and you'll see it and you can flip the camera angle and see it so on

00:35:44.360 problems and worries our brain's incredible at doing this but on things we want it's like oh

00:35:50.240 i see the ocean i see my dream house really what do you see i don't know but i see a picture of

00:35:55.660 okay you see one angle it's a snapshot is there sound did you add anything auditory did you add

00:36:01.140 anything kinesthetic did you change the color can you smell anything what's your and it really what

00:36:06.160 it comes down to is developing what we call like real sensory acuity the more senses the more acute

00:36:11.860 it is the more we built real pathways and i mean no one's ever asked me this on a podcast so and i

00:36:16.800 want to keep some of this for the stuff that i do you keep unpacking but having said it because i get

00:36:20.560 very passionate about this is like you're a way better visualizer than you think you just do it

00:36:25.160 with your problems you're really good at it and you do it all the time and you and you and you

00:36:30.220 don't even have to hit a button you can do it when you wake up you can do it when you go to sleep you

00:36:33.640 can do it when you're driving in your car you can do it sometimes you're just having a great time

00:36:36.820 you're like nah let me give myself a hit on my worries bam and you get a little bit more of your

00:36:40.300 worries ah when i'm passionate you know and so we're great at this in the negative things in our

00:36:45.040 life the people that are most blissful and successful and do it the easiest let me say

00:36:49.880 this last to you when you get good at really visualizing and creating new neural pathways

00:36:55.540 whatever you want just seeing things more repeatedly the success or bliss piece of it

00:37:02.000 is much easier to do and feels less taxing on you you're less fatigued less stressed and you

00:37:10.500 want to do it again doing it without it you still achieved without it you've still acquired things

00:37:16.780 without it but let's just be real for a lot of you it wasn't what you thought it would be when

00:37:21.440 you got there because it was so much of a taxing grind to get there where what if there were a way

00:37:27.500 to do it that's still difficult it's still a grind but it's it's far less taxing on you

00:37:34.500 emotionally and physically and psychologically to get there it's interesting because as you say this

00:37:40.840 it reminded me that i have an easier time worrying sure isn't that crazy that like we're literally

00:37:48.740 connecting the neural pathways of the things we don't want easier as a default than the desire of

00:37:53.820 the hundred by the way 98.9 of the people listening to this are going oh me too me too

00:38:00.640 most human beings because it's like the visualization literally the way you're saying

00:38:04.980 that we can turn it black and white and we can hit it from different angles but what if this

00:38:08.160 would happen of course but we never do that for the positive you don't run difference by the way

00:38:13.080 with your worries you can play the same video with like eight different scenarios too and and

00:38:19.060 it'll all be negative ones that you run in a loop and then you've got all these triggers to run them

00:38:23.240 and it doesn't take a lot to get you into that state whereas most people have no triggers for

00:38:27.100 the positive triggers for the visualization no triggers for building those new pathways that's

00:38:31.240 what you're saying is build the triggers and the the the mechanisms to get into that visualization

00:38:36.840 easier because it'll actually allow you to create easier.

00:38:39.260 And the last thing I would say to you is it's just a muscle.

00:38:42.280 You probably won't be very good at it at first.

00:38:44.820 And then the more you do it, you're like,

00:38:45.900 well, I'm getting better and better at this.

00:38:47.560 By the way, there are things that you are good at it with.

00:38:49.980 So if there's ever been like a person you wanted to date

00:38:53.720 when you were younger or now that you're sort of obsessed

00:38:56.600 with them a little bit, maybe not an unhealthy,

00:38:58.480 I'm talking about stalkerage,

00:38:59.440 but you've had lots of visualizations about it.

00:39:02.360 You've pictured lots of different angles,

00:39:04.140 lots of different stuff,

00:39:05.020 some of which you don't even want to repeat, right?

00:39:06.840 But you've got, there's a little glimpse in your ability to do it.

00:39:10.500 There's a little glimpse there on the positive things you want.

00:39:13.700 You could visualize it.

00:39:14.980 You could see it.

00:39:15.800 You can see all kinds of stuff.

00:39:17.240 You can slow it down.

00:39:18.340 You could speed it up.

00:39:19.340 You can change the angle.

00:39:20.720 So you have the ability within you.

00:39:23.340 It's just very minute compared to the negative things.

00:39:26.120 To use it.

00:39:27.220 One of the things I want to wrap up on, Ed, and it's, you know, the power of one more.

00:39:30.960 you talk about it is just every person has the potential to be the one yeah and i didn't call it

00:39:40.740 that but if you meet my family they will definitely say like where's your god dan dan went first yeah

00:39:47.740 and then people always say well we're brothers and sisters in trouble growing up yeah but it

00:39:53.360 seemed like once i got my life together and i and i changed the energy that everybody just kind of

00:39:58.260 came with us and like how beautiful is it and this is a thing i i want to acknowledge is um

00:40:06.460 the moment you realized that there was a one for your dad your dad was an alcoholic and somebody

00:40:13.640 showed up and was that for him and it shifted his life and your life yeah and my life yeah

00:40:19.840 because i'm here with you yeah so thank you for asking that i wrote the power of one more and i

00:40:26.080 um a lot of it has to do with my dad and you know one more was my dad got sober one more time and

00:40:32.420 then one day at a time it's interesting because that's a little bit of the book but the rest of

00:40:36.840 it is like really detailed stuff as you know but after i wrote it it was about six months

00:40:41.680 after i wrote it it was out actually woke up right down the bedroom right below where we're

00:40:47.440 sitting right now this house yeah in this house i was really was crying and uh christiana woke up

00:40:52.920 she goes what's wrong and I said babe I was kind of gasping and I'm like someone helped daddy and

00:40:58.380 she's like what and I go someone helped daddy and she goes what do you mean I go someone helped my

00:41:04.020 dad get sober why in the world this never occurred to me before but in my dad's program someone helps

00:41:09.400 you and she goes oh my gosh she said this person has no idea I'm my dad's son so the ripple effect

00:41:14.580 they did something great with their life they helped my dad in the darkest lowest moment of my

00:41:19.360 my father may be taking his own life certainly was going to lose his family certainly losing

00:41:24.240 his career but maybe his life and my dad's lowest moment of his life some precious human being

00:41:29.640 stepped forward and said i see you i see you i can help you let me tell you about you

00:41:37.460 and they changed and saved my dad's life that person has no idea that because they helped my

00:41:43.080 dad i'm his son i've reached millions of people they have no idea the ripple effect of that one

00:41:47.500 act of kindness, that one act of my intention is to serve you. Now, that's incredible. My wife goes,

00:41:55.420 oh my gosh. I said, that's not even the most amazing thing. The most amazing thing is what

00:42:01.360 qualified this person to help my dad? What qualified this person to help my dad is the

00:42:06.700 very thing most of us think disqualifies us from ever being successful. It was the things that

00:42:10.980 human being was most ashamed of, most embarrassed by. You know what qualified them? They were also

00:42:16.860 a drunk at one time they were also a drug addict they were also a liar they were also living in 0.57

00:42:21.980 the shadows they were also ashamed at one time in their life and because of that the thing that

00:42:27.020 they thought disqualified them was the very thing that was qualifying them to change my dad's life

00:42:32.380 and be the one in my dad's life in our lives we are constantly stacking things that we think

00:42:37.980 disqualifies my bankruptcy my business failure this sin of mine this thing i cheated on this

00:42:44.060 Mistake I made maybe it's none of that. I've just always been invisible and average and ordinary

00:42:48.400 So I'm disqualified going forward from not being and we stack these things and believe we're disqualified

00:42:53.720 Nothing could be further from the truth. You are most qualified to help the person or people you used to be

00:42:59.060 You used to be and in my dad's case, right? 0.99

00:43:01.800 That guy used to be a drunk that dude used to be an alcoholic that person used to be a liar and a drug addict 0.93

00:43:07.780 That's what qualified them so they could look at my dad and go. Let me tell you about you 0.98

00:43:12.620 I know who you are. I'm also that person and I changed. And that's also why it's so important

00:43:18.940 in life to continue to grow and change because every time you evolve into the next version of

00:43:23.540 you, you're more qualified to help the people you used to be. And so you're not disqualified

00:43:28.260 from being successful. You're not disqualified from being the one. In fact, probably the things

00:43:33.300 that you think are the disqualifiers are the very things God would prefer to use to help you change

00:43:39.160 other people's lives and ultimately your own even that mistake I made with my family I could

00:43:44.000 that family that I didn't know I could have easily lived the rest of my life going man I'm disqualified

00:43:48.160 I didn't help that family that's not the case the case is I'm immensely qualified because I made that

00:43:53.800 mistake to never do it again and to help all these other families do you know how many families I told

00:43:58.220 I'm not leaving here tonight because let me tell you about this mistake I made once and I'm not

00:44:02.980 making it tonight with your family and how many of them were persuaded by that story to then

00:44:07.600 participate. So the thing I thought disqualified me actually qualified me most to help the rest

00:44:12.500 of the families. It's true. That was powerful. Because I think most people wouldn't have

00:44:21.240 connected the shame, the area of life that they feel less than deficit as the tool that they

00:44:29.820 should be using to go serve the world. If you're faith-based and if you're not, that's okay,

00:44:33.280 everybody listening. But if you're faith-based, if I'm the adversary and I want to get you to 1.00

00:44:36.500 quit on your dream there's one weapon i'm going to use against you discouragement i'm going to

00:44:41.180 get you discouraged and believe you're disqualified because if i can get you to believe that you have

00:44:45.060 no chance and most people are walking around discouraged thinking they're disqualified

00:44:49.080 and they're actually hanging that lie onto the very thing that is probably their qualifier

00:44:55.280 that's the irony it's like if you really in politics right now what you do in politics if

00:44:59.720 you want to win you accuse the other party of the very thing you do and you do it before they can

00:45:03.720 accuse you and so in life what we do the adversary does is he gets us to accuse us with the things

00:45:09.200 that are the very thing that would be the key to get us to go change our life uses it a weapon

00:45:13.520 against us and so don't let anybody do that to you that's beautiful and as we wrap up last night i

00:45:18.740 was uh we're staying at the ritz and uh one of the girls asked she said what are you doing in town

00:45:24.020 i said um we're doing a bunch of stuff and i'm interviewing this guy ed and oh who is he said

00:45:28.640 oh ed my light he's got a super popular podcast she goes am i like why do i know that name well

00:45:33.360 probably known from social media and followership and she pulls out her phone and her mom had been

00:45:38.320 sending your episodes to this this woman that's cool but she you know she just is my mom sending 0.96

00:45:44.400 me stuff yeah and she goes what does he do and i said well ask me a question for him and here's

00:45:51.440 the question that she wanted me to ask you that i thought was just appropriate way for us to to wrap

00:45:56.240 up which is she's got a dream and she wants to go for it but she's scared and she gets it she

00:46:04.880 reads the personal development what do you think she's missing in the one belief that would cause 0.90

00:46:11.180 her to just go for it the people that are listening they're on the sidelines and they're like

00:46:16.060 just what do i not see that would be enough for me to finally do it what would you say to that well

00:46:23.320 we've covered a lot of the things today i'll give you one thing is that you you can't like no one

00:46:27.860 could teach you how to drive a parked car and there's a thing in your life that's a magnifier

00:46:32.760 called momentum and if you see anybody who's got something pretty pretty good going in their life

00:46:38.000 they got a little momentum just a bit like you're a hockey fan because you're from canada yeah does

00:46:42.520 the best team every year win the stanley cup no often it's the team with the goaltender with the

00:46:48.200 most momentum in baseball in the postseason very rarely does the team with the best record win the

00:46:53.300 the MLB World Series, it's the team with the hottest pitching staff or the hottest bats.

00:46:57.180 They get momentum. And if you're stuck in your life, it's because there's a lack of momentum in

00:47:02.400 it. Momentum takes average ordinary people and makes them appear to be superhuman. And superhuman

00:47:09.120 is just a matter of momentum. So what do you do to generate momentum is the key. You have to do

00:47:13.020 really difficult and feared things first. So in your day, people always say, you know, do first

00:47:17.800 things first in your life if you could start to build the habit of doing feared things first

00:47:23.380 difficult things first I actually think that people that are successful have a different

00:47:28.320 relationship with pain than people that are unsuccessful I think that I'd Phil Heath on

00:47:33.840 my podcast who's won Mr. Olympia like six times which is just insane and I said Phil why do you

00:47:38.800 think you won six Olympias and he gave a good answer because Phil's brilliant and I said I

00:47:44.340 don't think that's why he goes you don't i said no i think you have a different relationship with

00:47:49.020 pain i think you chase pain in the gym i think when everybody else is doing leg day and they've

00:47:53.960 thrown up twice they kind of throw down you go ah i'm gonna barf again i'm gonna do three of them

00:47:58.340 you started to correlate going through pain with winning and what i will tell you is that

00:48:04.180 napoleon hill says in think and grow rich it's a great book but the best part of it is most people

00:48:08.220 don't know this if you can survive the temporary on the other side of temporary pain you meet

00:48:13.440 another version of yourself and I have found that in my life most people avoid pain and discomfort

00:48:19.140 and that what happens is they never create any momentum in their life and so if you can survive

00:48:23.320 the temporary and all pain is temporary my dad was in a lot of pain when he had cancer and when he

00:48:27.960 passed away that pain's gone so all pain is term the only thing that's permanent is our souls in

00:48:32.940 our life and if you're a young person listening to this I'm gonna tell you something you don't

00:48:38.080 want to get to the end of your life and pledge your life scared there's nothing like getting

00:48:42.560 to the end of a life and I meet people like this all the time and they go I wanted it and I never

00:48:48.240 went for it because I was afraid and to me when you die I want to go to heaven I want the Lord to

00:48:54.640 say well done good and faithful servant but you've heard me say this before I actually think you meet

00:48:58.740 the man or woman you were capable of going to introduce you to somebody I think you meet the

00:49:02.380 man or woman you were capable of when you were born with the destiny of your life and to me

00:49:06.620 heaven is to say hey man I've been chasing that you all my life and to have the ultimate me with

00:49:11.680 the memories the emotions the experiences the dreams the contribution go hey man been watching

00:49:17.100 you you did it nice work you caught me man yeah you caught it and he looks like to me that's heaven

00:49:21.520 yeah hell hell looks a lot different you get to heaven you get there and that ultimate version

00:49:29.300 of you is there and you go i was chasing you and i yeah man i saw you were coming and then

00:49:33.140 and then yeah i had this setback and the economy changed and someone hurt me and i had a relationship

00:49:40.300 not work and I just like yeah crap I blew it and you know what I was just afraid I lived my life

00:49:53.120 afraid and the ultimate version is you look back and go I saw that and you don't get another one

00:49:59.360 you don't get another one I'm really sorry I don't recognize you to me that's hell and I think there

00:50:06.700 has to become a point in your life where you just decide metaphorically at least you want to go to

00:50:10.020 heaven and you do that by doing really difficult things in a short period of time and then i'll

00:50:14.700 give you one last thing i write about this in my book gotta give yourself credit for invisible

00:50:18.300 progress so that most people quit in life because they don't see tangible visible progress so i went

00:50:28.200 to a i'll tell you this last several years back i got invited to a four-year-old's birthday party

00:50:33.100 i did not want to go because it was four-year-olds i go and uh they had a pinata there you know what

00:50:41.520 pinata is and it's the greatest metaphor i ever saw in my my entire life for life so what do they

00:50:47.060 do they take this little kid they put a blindfold on him they spin him around and give him a bat 0.84

00:50:51.380 and he's just swinging and flailing he doesn't even know where the pinata is that's a lot like

00:50:55.560 a startup entrepreneur or someone with a dream they're just so finally what they do he gets a

00:50:59.780 little coaching they point him at the pinata so now he's hitting the pinata bang bang bang beating

00:51:05.280 it no candy comes out he finally goes this thing ain't working so he quits you've been to these

00:51:09.860 parties they take the next little guy blindfold him spin him around he whacks it next kid whacks 0.87

00:51:15.700 it so like six kids go to beat the heck out of this pinata no candy's coming out there's no

00:51:20.700 progress so they all bail to the swing set left is this little three-year-old little girl they

00:51:27.140 put the pinata they give the blindfold to her she gets the bat swings once bam hits it bam all the 0.99

00:51:33.800 candy comes out every kid runs back and jumps and gets all the candy what broke the pinata

00:51:39.860 was it that little kid's last shot or was it the compound pounding of the cumulative shots of all

00:51:47.140 the shots on the pinata before well we all know the answer it was the cumulative blows the compound

00:51:52.840 pounding on that pinata is the last one knocked it out in life most people quit before the candy

00:51:59.860 comes out because they don't see the pinata breaking even though because they're not taking

00:52:04.720 credit for invisible progress from what I call compound pounding you keep compounding the

00:52:11.520 pounding you're doing and even though it doesn't look like it you're breaking down that pinata

00:52:15.980 towards your dream towards that moment but most you've seen this just most people man they just

00:52:21.420 quit before the candy comes out and it's right there it's right there it's it and we don't know

00:52:26.060 when the next blow is but if you're waiting for visible progress all the time you're probably

00:52:31.600 going to quit you have to give yourself credit for compound pounding life and business is a lot

00:52:36.060 raising kids is that way it's a lot like the pinata you're like am i getting through here

00:52:40.200 is anything happening i don't see any progress they still misbehave there's still this but

00:52:45.240 hopefully when they become adults the candy comes out yeah business the candy comes out bliss the

00:52:50.420 candy training and working out you're working out you hit a wall you're like i can't lose these 10

00:52:55.640 pounds keep going eventually the candy comes out so in life it's a lot like a pinata i wish we

00:53:02.260 would have done this in front of like thousands of people because we'd be getting standard ovation

00:53:06.040 over standard ovation and this has been incredible no for real like this is uh beautiful um if you

00:53:12.520 haven't gotten ed's book go get his book if you're on amazon at the same time you might want to throw

00:53:16.460 mine in the uh in the basket but um i actually signed your copy and i said thank you for never

00:53:24.540 quitting because i want to acknowledge you because like you've had such an impact on my life and at

00:53:30.820 any point you could add somebody by your will to win thank you and you didn't neither of you brother

00:53:36.680 i appreciate that it's uh excited about our friendship thanks so much ed cheers

00:53:46.460 We'll be right back.

Dan Martell - March 20, 2023

Watch This If You’re Stuck In Your Life ｜ Ed Mylett Interview

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