Daniel Gabay is a mental health coach and has been in the business for almost a decade. He has been through a lot in his life and has a lot of experience in addiction and recovery. In this episode, he talks about his journey with addiction and how he managed to overcome it. He also talks about how he got into recovery and what he does to stay sober.
00:09:42.000So, you know, it's going to be a nice, fun show.
00:09:44.000And, yeah, hopefully he can convince me to live a better, healthier lifestyle or, you know, at least drink a little less or something like that.
00:10:08.000Most of it is health, trauma, stress, and addiction.
00:10:10.000But especially recently, it seems like it just got pushed into recovery and addiction because a lot of people are having a hard time right now.
00:12:44.000And then in the hospital, they didn't expect me to survive.
00:12:46.000and they pumped me with the hardest narcotics you could get like Dilaudid even for dressing changes they had to inject ketamine right into my Yeah.
00:13:01.000And I was really lucky because when I got out of the hospital, I stopped the narcotics cold turkey at like the peak of my pain.
00:13:11.000But during that time, I realized how addictive they are.
00:13:17.000No, no, they send you home with a bottle of pills.
00:13:20.000Like, I had the pills, but it's like the pain was so high that sometimes it wouldn't even kick in.
00:13:25.000But at that time, they're like, oh yeah, Oxy is like 4% addictive.
00:13:29.000But when it's in your body, you're like, this is like really, really addicting.
00:13:33.000So I spent about six years after that volunteering for like a nonprofit to get people like off of drugs and people who had been in bad traffic accidents or their families and just be around to try to get them off of these things.
00:13:46.000Because somebody who's like never done hard drugs in their whole life could just go to the hospital, say they break their leg, and then they leave and they get a bottle of pills, they could be on heroin in like a year or like they could die from that.
00:14:29.000You do, like, it's like, here's AA meetings and then you do like the final frontier of things.
00:14:36.000Basically, so a lot of my previous and current clients are in AA, but I'm usually where people end up when like the system really didn't work for them.
00:14:46.000Wait, so you're saying you're the final boss?
00:15:01.000I'm going to do my best to like, obviously, we're joking around a bit, but like by the end of this podcast, I want to figure out like what you envision, what you want things to be like for you.
00:16:47.000And hopefully, in a couple of years, I want it to be free for everybody.
00:16:50.000But the only thing is, is like when somebody even pays like a little bit, they're more invested in the outcome when something's just like a free service.
00:16:59.000But usually, I just work with people for like a few months because I try to get them improve in whatever way.
00:17:05.000Have you ever started like a podcast or YouTube series?
00:17:09.000I think that's something that you should do because if you invest one on a one and a one and one, I think that's a lot of your time.
00:17:16.000So, I think if you just start a channel with our audience, maybe a few hundred people watching at the same time, you could do a live show and then you can talk to them and they can send super chats and you could, you know, I'm definitely down because you want to do it for free.
00:18:03.000And when I wake up, I see like these text messages.
00:18:05.000I'm like, fuck, I shouldn't never text this bitch last night.
00:18:08.000So, like, you know, y'all niggas, when y'all be lit, drunk, or whatever, y'all text that, what you doing text at like three o'clock in the morning.
00:18:15.000And then when you wake up, you're like, fuck, I shouldn't never text this shit.
00:20:03.000Like, I take some notes based on your lifestyle and stuff.
00:20:05.000And then I try to find the pain points to see if it's an issue or not.
00:20:10.000But it's just like if somebody's not at their best, or like, for example, if somebody has a family or they have kids and like they keep drinking, they don't realize like the damage it does to their body.
00:20:24.000So I'm not saying like, oh, never have a drink or like be sober forever or like never take a shot of Henny, never celebrate.
00:20:30.000But when it gets to the point where like you're really hurting your body, it's problematic because if people depend on you and you're not at your best, it's...
00:27:07.000It's, you know, and dealing with women in general, it's a pain at times.
00:27:10.000Not all women, but, you know, we shout out to some of the lady mods in the chat and, you know, in our community and girls who actually DM me.
00:27:18.000It's not easy dealing with these girls.
00:28:22.000So it's never like you go home if you're alone, you just open a bottle and hit.
00:28:26.000Because look, I don't judge because I've seen everything, like the extremes of everything.
00:28:31.000Like I had certain clients, and nobody knows who any of my clients are or anything like that.
00:28:37.000And I always keep that protected, but I've certain clients they would get home at like 11 p.m., just open a bottle of something, finish half of it in like an hour.
00:28:46.000Well, I mean, like, don't you think it's because I work, right?
00:28:49.000Like stressful, so they wanted to edge off.
00:28:51.000Sometimes because everybody has like a like a different reason, right?
00:28:54.000Some people are in physical pain and they drink to take that away.
00:28:57.000Some people have really bad emotional pain and they drink for that.
00:29:00.000Some people just want to numb themselves, so they use it for that.
00:29:03.000And not only alcohol, obviously all types of drugs.
00:29:06.000But like if we're going to focus on alcohol today, it's difficult because some people really drink because they have anxiety and they don't realize that when you're drinking, even four or five drinks in an evening, the next day you wake up and like even somebody who has zero anxiety, they'll be like, why do I feel like shit?
00:32:31.000A lot of people, like, they'll go to the Caribbean or somewhere and they'll bring like two bottles home because that's the max.
00:32:37.000But in general, like the older you get or it's not even about age.
00:32:42.000It's like when you're constantly drinking or you drink like three nights a week or four nights a week, you realize the toll it takes on your body.
00:32:50.000And when you take a break, you realize how tough it is.
00:34:00.000Because if I'm too sober, then it's like, oh, they're having fun.
00:34:04.000So do you get like, do you think you have a bit more patience like when you have a couple of drinks to chill yourself out?
00:34:12.000Yeah, I have more patience when it comes to, you know, dealing with certain things because like walking around and dealing with people in general is like, you know, I mean, I'm sure people couldn't in check understand.
00:34:21.000So I'm guessing you could say the anxiety of being in the club with people that's like, you know, out here doing crazy shit.
00:34:30.000I'm like, all right, let me just, you know, drink it just to have a, you know, a loose feeling.
00:35:07.000If you want me to, like, what I usually do, I find out somebody's lifestyle and then we talk about like working towards like a better version of themselves.
00:35:16.000So for example, if you cut down the drinking, right?
00:35:19.000And obviously I'm here because like people around you care about you and maybe the audience.
00:36:01.000And that's why actually living in Miami, this is my fourth year, I drink the least that I've ever drank in my whole life.
00:36:08.000But it's because of like the things that you fill your lifestyle with.
00:36:12.000So I know your job, sometimes it's going to make you drink, or sometimes you have to be in social situations where you have to entertain or deal with people, right?
00:36:20.000But the less you drink, the easier it is to hit your goals health-wise.
00:36:25.000And like if the drinking is something that you have to lean on, it eventually becomes an issue.
00:39:12.000All right, I don't really need like, you know, like me personally, I don't drink I'm alone, I drink socially.
00:39:17.000And if the goal is, you know, one of the goals is, you know, hey, if I go out to a social setting and drink and then have no drinks, which I did, no, I haven't did.
00:39:27.000But, you know, if I go out to social settings, will that pressure of drinking there?
00:39:32.000But once again, it's one of those things where, yeah, I would like to drink less for sure.
00:39:37.000So that's good, because look, with all the people that I've worked with, like the person really has to want to change.
00:39:43.000You know, almost everybody I've worked with, I feel like they moved forward.
00:39:46.000And obviously, it's not like every person is going to stop doing drugs or stop drinking, but like they have to want to change.
00:39:54.000Like I had one guy who he didn't want to change at all.
00:39:57.000He thought everything he did, even having a bottle of liquor per night, most nights per week, drinking alone all the time, doing a lot of like different drugs, he to himself, he's like, this is how I want to live my life.
00:40:09.000And he was the toughest person I ever had to work with.
00:40:12.000And I just want to cover a couple of things for the audience because I understand your reasons and like being social and stuff like that.
00:40:20.000But in general, like say, for example, if you had nerve pain, right, from your accident, like I did, from mine.
00:41:02.000And honestly, it lowers nerve pain a lot.
00:41:04.000So like anybody in the audience, if you have nerve pain from surgeries or you have a bunch of issues, there's a couple things just to keep in mind.
00:41:32.000And also people who don't have anxiety, like me, if I drink enough, say, one night, the next day I'll wake up and I'll be like, why do I have anxiety?
00:41:43.000I'm not a person who has anxiety, but it's like just that chemical change when your body's going through something.
00:41:50.000Sometimes you'll be stressed out about things that you won't usually be stressed out about, right?
00:41:56.000And then just for anybody in the audience, if like you have any injuries that are nagging you or anything like that, lifting heavy weights, it lowers nerve pain significantly.
00:42:07.000There's something it does to the nervous system and it calms your body down.
00:42:10.000Things that raise nerve pain are like stress, bad lifestyle, having bad sleep, and lifting weights like heavy, like at 78% of your max, it lowers that.
00:42:22.000So like say you add nerve pain in your neck or your back.
00:42:26.000Even if you did like bench press, right, which doesn't put as much pressure on your back and you did it to like near your max, after that workout, you would have less nerve pain.
00:43:00.000But if I lift heavy weights like three times a week, it'll make it dip so much.
00:43:06.000And then also the lifestyle in Miami, we have like the sun, the beach, every building has a pool, sauna, like I play tennis, you have paddle, like all those things.
00:43:17.000The more positive things you add to your life that are healthy, the less it's going to make you depend on like drugs or alcohol or like drinking.
00:43:24.000And also like if you go and you drink and then the next day you play paddle for 90 minutes and you're sweating, you're like, I wish I didn't drink.
00:43:30.000Or like, I don't want to be less sharp.
00:43:33.000So these are like reasons to lower it.
00:43:36.000I'm not telling people to never drink.
00:43:37.000Obviously, if somebody has a problem and some people who are alcoholics, they have one drink or two drinks.
00:43:44.000They can't stop themselves from getting to 10.
00:43:46.000They have to really just have nothing.
00:44:02.000You fill your life with as many like healthy things as possible and it's going to, it has the ability to push out a lot of the bad things, right?
00:44:11.000So if you're, if you're super busy, there's some people who like drink and do drugs.
00:44:15.000It's because they really have nothing to do.
00:44:20.000And it's, honestly, even the healthiest person, like mentally strong, everything meditates.
00:44:27.000If they have nothing to do or they're idle, it leads to psychosis.
00:44:31.000That's why people who really are bored, they always gravitate towards extremes, like the worst stuff ever.
00:44:39.000So like the more positive things you add, the better it is.
00:44:42.000And then like for the future you, for example, say you find like the right woman that you want to be with and you have kids, okay?
00:44:50.000The drinking, like if it continues and it continues in too high of an amount, it's like you're kind of letting them down because it's not just you.
00:44:58.000Because if it was just you, it's like I can do whatever I want to my body.
00:45:01.000If I don't want to hit my workout goals or I want to drink or I get enjoyment out of that, it's just you.
00:45:06.000But when you have a family, it's a bit different because you have people that depend on you.
00:45:11.000And like sometimes, look, I've certain clients that if they're not dating or they don't have a woman in their life, like it makes it tougher because if somebody meets the right woman, she's not going to tolerate that.
00:45:24.000She's not going to be like, you can't just have 14 drinks in a night.
00:46:20.000You don't want to affect that because to me, that's more important than anything.
00:46:23.000Yeah, I mean, listen, you know, I mean, I haven't really experienced that yet, but I know sometimes it's a lot, you know, sometimes I have to really think and get it into it to really get it up there.
00:46:33.000But so far, so good, no issues with that.
00:46:36.000But yeah, I can understand how if you've drank a lot, then Olympic is not good to have chat.
00:46:46.000And also, at some point, somebody realizes if they drink too much, right, that it's actually stopping them from doing like what they need to do.
00:46:58.000When somebody like leans into something because of their pain or anxiety or something negative, and then it stops them from like going out.
00:47:07.000And like, if you want to meet girls and like you're so drunk that they won't tell right now.
00:47:14.000I've had guys come up with me and say, Chris, I was so late last night.
00:47:17.000I was at a table with four girls and I was fucked up.
00:48:42.000And once again, you guys don't know, but I have been drinking a lot less these past two or three months.
00:48:47.000So what he's saying is, you know, he's definitely right, you know, in terms of like, you know, just introducing healthy habits to push out the drinking habits.
00:49:37.000So I'm not telling people to not be social or whatever, but because most people don't know, because once again, it's like, it's like, where do you, because people say, oh, stop drinking, you know, drink less.
00:49:48.000Okay, then what are you going to replace it with?
00:49:50.000And, you know, I don't believe in zero to because I used to be a teacher.
00:52:56.000Like, for example, when I went to Latvia, I looked into the scams that they have.
00:53:00.000So I was in Latvia and I found out the scam there is like, this is like 15 years ago.
00:53:05.000You'll go there and then like a couple women will meet you and they'll be like, hey, like, do you want to get a drink?
00:53:11.000Like just normal looking, like attractive girls.
00:53:14.000And then they have a deal with the bar where you go in, you go to get them drinks and they'll get something that isn't even really alcohol.
00:53:20.000It'll be like a drink that's like green or something like that, like a cocktail.
00:53:24.000And then they'll charge like the tourists like five times the amount for that cocktail.
00:53:28.000And then their drink will be just a normal drink.
00:53:45.000This has nothing to do with women, but like he got caught by that scam where like a really big guy walks next to you and he has like reading glasses in his hand.
00:53:53.000And then he just like gently hits your hand and like drops the glasses.
00:53:58.000And then he'll be like, oh, sorry, whatever.
00:53:59.000And then he'll come back to you like 30 seconds later and be like, you broke my glasses.
00:56:39.000My biggest issue with the weed pens, I've been cold turkey for two days, and I'm noticing the anxiety creep up, sweating in my sleep, awkward dreams, and cravings.
00:56:48.000Any advice on how to continue to stay off the weed pens?
00:56:51.000I work out often and I need to find more things to help me out.
00:56:55.000Also, what are the cons of weed pens that make me not smoke them anymore?
00:57:41.000Like, like I've met somebody, like a client who he had a vape with nicotine and he had cigarettes just in case like something happened with his vape and like he would do different things.
00:57:55.000Like people get anxiety if they don't have it.
00:57:57.000The thing about weed, this is just my opinion.
00:58:00.000I think if somebody has chronic pain, I totally get it.
00:58:04.000If somebody, even for me, like in my case, right?
00:58:08.000If I knew how marijuana worked, it would help a lot of nights of screaming, like towards the beginning of my injury.
00:58:17.000However, I didn't feel sharp the next day.
00:58:42.000If you just stick it out for a bit longer, try to work out, try to do other things just to get to like a week, even coffee, for example, right?
00:58:49.000I would have, uh, I had a nice espresso machine.
00:58:53.000I would drink like one coffee a day and it was fine.
00:58:56.000And then I would play tennis against somebody who was like, I'm a lefty and I would play tennis against somebody who was like kind of like a mirror of me.
00:59:03.000And I would sweat so much and it would be like two hours where you like couldn't walk after.
00:59:08.000And I'm like, what I can, what can I do to make this a bit better?
00:59:12.000So I stopped drinking coffee to see if it would make me sweat less.
00:59:39.000I actually didn't even have a meal today.
00:59:41.000I wanted to stay focused, stay sharp for tonight.
00:59:44.000But I try to only have it once or twice a week, even though I think it's like the best thing on earth.
00:59:49.000But when your body is used to anything, whether especially narcotics or any type of drug or alcohol, when you really stop, you're going to feel a lot of weird things.
01:04:47.000This net depression is capping non-stop.
01:04:49.000I mean, guys, you got to understand, you know, just to talk about your, you know, alcohol abuse, which I don't have, but many people have, apparently, right?
01:04:59.000Like, you have to get to the root of things, like mentally, why you do it, why you drink.
01:05:04.000So this is why the talk is important, guys.
01:05:06.000Usually one-on-one, we get to those pain points.
01:05:09.000We figure out where people's like anxiety come from and stuff like that.
01:05:13.000And if somebody has an issue, like AA is a great option because like you see a lot of people who are in your spot or were in your spot who are who are sober if you need to reduce their drinking.
01:05:23.000But at the end of the day, if you want to get to the next level and be healthier, whoever it is out there, reducing your drinking will probably be very helpful.
01:05:47.000And like even with you, realistically, right?
01:05:52.000I'm not saying like, oh, don't ever drink again or like don't have henny or like don't celebrate or don't occasionally like drink when you're stressed out.
01:06:00.000But like it's about lowering it to a healthy place where you don't depend on it at all to do what you need to do.
01:06:05.000You know, at the same time, like say you're dealing with really annoying people, talking yourself through it and be like, look, I'm not going to see this person again ever.
01:06:12.000You know, or like, I mean, but they work back here.
01:07:36.000I could hit you up every day and force you to work out a bit more and maybe hit your goals a little bit more quickly and see.
01:07:45.000You know, I don't know how much you really drink.
01:07:48.000You know, I just want for like the audience or whoever to hopefully get some help from this.
01:07:54.000And anybody with more questions could hit me up after.
01:07:57.000I'll do my best to answer whatever DMs.
01:07:59.000But like, I think you need to add more things maybe that stress you less or things that are like just for you that aren't work that make you not lean on the alcohol.
01:08:09.000Oh, and for anybody else, some people are like, oh, I go out with my friends.
01:08:13.000If I'm not drinking, I get peer pressure.
01:08:16.000If you're out anywhere and like, say, a younger person who's like, if I'm the only one not drinking, people are going to give me a hard time.
01:08:22.000You could just get a club soda with lime and nobody is going to look at you twice.
01:08:26.000They think they're a drink, that it's an alcoholic beverage.
01:08:30.000If it's something you have to hide from people.
01:08:35.000And I had someone tell me they drink, but they told me, hey, listen, if you get sparkling water with lemon and lime, mint, that's like a good fix.
01:08:47.000And at Mo, when I was there, I had a cup of water and mint.
01:08:51.000And I don't know if they saw me, but I wasn't drinking alcohol there either.
01:08:55.000Exactly, because it's nobody's business.
01:09:27.000I've been going out more, you know, just being more aware of things.
01:09:30.000And once again, because my ear, you know, I can't drink when I'm on, you know, but it'll make it worse, especially like science makes it worse.
01:16:06.000And guys, don't damn me for with your problems because I'll just lock your shit and then just leave you on Reddit because I deal with a lot of shit.