In this episode, we have Dom Luker on the show to talk about his dating life, his relationship with his ex-wife, and why he doesn t want to have kids. We also have Mara and Charlene, who talk about why they have no kids and why they don t want them.
00:10:22.000I mean, there's certain things you don't say, but I used to be a dancer, you know, trapper, whatever scammer, whatever you want to call it.
00:22:19.000You can have like the perfect, for me personally, you can find a guy that's perfect, perfect setting, perfect home, perfect career, perfect everything.
00:22:27.000But internally, he probably has something, some damage to him.
00:23:52.000How'd you find a good man and why are you single?
00:23:57.000I don't know where to really go to like nice places because I feel like, you know, when you're trying to find someone that's within your caliber, you should go to places, I'm assuming, within your caliber.
00:24:13.000So if like, if you're looking for, I don't know.
00:25:11.000Well, I've actually ended up finding nice relationships and new friends because I'm like, and even female friends, you know, new acquaintances, you know, people with opportunities and stuff like that where we can help each other grow.
00:25:29.000So it's like I've been so busy with school and work that I'm so focused on that that I don't feel at this time I have the time to pour and focus into someone else.
00:25:39.000So it'll be selfish for me to like even try to.
00:27:35.000And I feel like when you have like hobbies, you know what I mean?
00:27:39.000Like things that actually take up your time.
00:27:43.000Of course, you're not all of if you like to do, I don't do pottery, but if you like to do pottery, you meet somebody there, they could be nice.
00:27:51.000And but like you said, they could not have enough time for you or not be the person for you.
00:27:58.000But at least it's, I don't know, better than just meeting somebody somewhere you're not comfortable.
00:28:06.000Like if you don't like to go to the club, but somebody comes, you know, you try to talk to them or something and you guys don't have interest.
00:28:12.000The meeting of the diet has a lot to do with how women feel.
00:28:15.000It's like comfortability and what feels right, but that's not really keys to success.
00:28:19.000You know, it's kind of, I think it's basing your reality on emotions and that in itself leads to failure.
00:28:39.000Definitely, they rule the world for a reason.
00:28:41.000But there's certain like levels to it, maybe.
00:28:43.000Like as I don't want to like rebuttal you guys, but maybe there's certain levels, but I know for a fact if I don't feel comfortable with a guy, I'm not going no matter what the fuck they got going on.
00:29:45.000No hopes in the club is like, why get there without your mans?
00:29:48.000But the thing is that there's absolutely not a second where I have a chance of where he has a chance of thinking that I'm not coming straight home.
00:34:19.000The church, I mean, no, what I'm trying to figure out is, did you, were you initially looking for the church going man when you were trying to find me?
00:34:27.000No, but if I were, I'm going to go to church, is what I'm trying to tell you.
00:34:30.000No, I'm saying initially through your love life.
00:34:32.000No, but my love life has been one person consistent for about 11 years.
00:34:35.000So I'm not looking and it's complicated.
00:34:38.000But if I were to get back on the market, you're saying that you initially weren't looking for a church going man in the past.
00:34:45.000But you guys asked, where would you look for a man?
00:34:48.000And I know, but I'm just saying there's a question, so it would be now, but it wasn't then.
00:34:52.000So, when you were looking for a baby father, etc., you wasn't looking for a man that would have been a little bit more.
00:34:56.000No, my baby father is perfect, so let's not even take it there.
00:34:59.000But if I were to look for a man, I'm just saying the only reason I'm saying that is because it's typically, it seems like it just seems like to me that a lot of the good guys get overlooked until the women become baby mothers, and then they probably have to be aware of that.
00:35:13.000That's a question because you guys are asking where would you guys find a good woman?
00:35:29.000Because if you meet, I'm not gonna say older because it could be a younger and it could be an older woman.
00:35:33.000If you meet a woman that's already set in her mind, and let's say she's a stripper or you know, it's a nightlife or night work, you know what I'm saying?
00:35:42.000So, it's like, how would you change somebody?
00:35:44.000But you like her, so it's not the influence.
00:35:47.000Well, that necessarily don't go for those, but you can try.
00:36:50.000Survival brings about people's true and biology, uh, biological nature, which means, by example, they're gonna want to have security at the very end of the day, which means the bottom line is money is very important.
00:37:00.000So, ultimately, in Miami, most women want money as a factor of living here long term.
00:37:05.000So, my thing is, like, good women nowadays are hard to find because they want money up front for the most part.
00:37:10.000Not every woman, of course, but like most of them here in Miami, especially in Berkeley.
00:37:15.000What's crazy is that my parents have been together for like almost 40 years, and my dad has always been a provider.
00:37:26.000So, everybody talking about nowadays women look at money, it's not looking at money, it's looking at providing.
00:37:35.000And certain women will go for a lower-class man because they don't need that much, you know what I mean?
00:37:41.000Like she said, you date in your category, you date in your tier, whatever, right?
00:37:47.000So, if I'm working at McDonald's and I'm living on a couch, clearly, I'm not looking for a, but he could still provide for what I need, which is not much, you know what I mean?
00:38:04.000But I feel like women always look for providers no matter what level you're looking for.
00:38:10.000I do agree that some women are asking for more than what the fuck they're worth nowadays because I feel like every bitch feels like you can't take me to Cheesecake Factory on a first date.
00:38:21.000But I literally just got done talking about that today.
00:39:01.000I just said, like, women think they're worth more than yeah, but then you're also defending women that damn the point is that, like, I think nowadays, especially that dating is definitely more transactional.
00:39:11.000And at the end of the day, yes, you can say some women are going to go for lower-tier men, but ultimately, what do they all want?
00:39:23.000Without due respect, I don't necessarily agree because when you're saying, as far as a provider, um, initially, everybody always randomly thinks a provider, it has to do with money.
00:39:33.000I mean, there's a lot of women nowadays that are making their own money that they don't need you to provide them an income, they need you to provide them something more that they can't give themselves with the money.
00:39:43.000So, like, just the other day, I asked a question at the event, um, and I was asking to pick in between the two: would you prefer to be with a loyal and a broke person or a rich and toxic person?
00:39:58.000And after the poll that I did, the majority of the people chose loyal and broke.
00:40:36.000I mean, not necessarily respecting them, but unfortunately, there's going to be a conflict that would not exist if he was making more money than her.
00:40:45.000Hold on, does your man agreed more money than you?
00:46:50.000I actually demonstrate this thing full-time.
00:46:53.000A lady talking about her struggles with dating.
00:46:56.000And what's happening is she's definitely masculine, definitely been through a couple guys, but she understands now that dating is just a change that's cooked.
00:47:10.000And funny, you posted this video actually.
00:49:53.000Like, of course, I feel like every girl, and you're lying if you didn't go through it, but the first time you ever felt like you were in love, like you went through it.
00:50:33.000I haven't screamed out of phone like that, but I have been like in a situation where I have felt maybe I think she feels more still like her, played with, confused, you know, because sometimes not just men, but women do the same thing and like play games with the opposite sex as well.
00:50:54.000But it's like it was a point where I was talking to someone and I will always think it was gonna like go somewhere because of the way like he would treat me.
00:51:02.000But then it was like, then when I wasn't there and I would say like little things that would insinuate more exclusivity, then it's like, oh no, then we're just friends.
00:53:11.000When you go to these events, have you ever like gone back and told your friends like any dudes that you saw was attractive or you know, you had some good connections?
00:54:40.000So it's like I see women like that that's complaining, and a lot of times they're overlooking the men that if they gave them the chance, if they got to know them and found out they had the potential, they were going to give them the world forever.
00:54:52.000Because one thing about a man, if you believe in them, when they're chasing their dreams, no matter how much of a dog they might be, they'll never give up on you.
00:55:27.000So to me, it's kind of like this video here encompasses and shows that a lot of men are passing about good guys because they don't feel like the guys good to them are going to be good for them long term.
00:55:36.000Intuition is there, but it's not really there because that could happen to a lot of women.
00:55:41.000So, but yeah, so going back this way one more time.
00:55:45.000Let's say, right, you found a dream, you're a dream guy, which you kind of found a guy ready.
00:55:51.000What would you bring to him on to the table?
00:55:53.000Like, would you give him like loyalty?
00:58:24.000So your husband wants you to quit your job and stay at home mom.
00:58:27.000He doesn't want me to, but yeah, that's the end goal.
00:58:31.000When I am a mom, like I'm not a mom right now, and I like to have my own money, and he still, of course, provides for whatever I need, like you know, but I like to have my own too.
00:58:44.000Good though, well, I mean, I mean, it makes sense, especially if the husband approves.
00:58:48.000I mean, shit, having a kid, I feel like this, man.
00:58:50.000It's too many people that's rushing to have kids on emotion.
00:58:53.000If you're doing it intentional, and I can't deny that, man, I can't even declip for him.
00:58:58.000Like, I can't help but fuck with that because I don't have kids because a pussy is good.
00:59:01.000Yeah, that too, but a kid is like it's just permanent.
00:59:04.000So, I think a lot of mothers that when they become understood, they wish they could wait their time.
00:59:07.000So, if you take your time with it, I can't disagree with that.
00:59:09.000But I would say a shit with women, it's unfortunate, man.
00:59:42.000Like, I've traveled so much, I have such a good time, and I know I'll be able to do that with a kid, but it's just like you know, what worries me?
01:05:19.000What would you give to him to make it work?
01:05:23.000I agree with a lot of the things that you were saying about the submission to a man because I feel like how can a man be a man by you not being submissive?
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01:15:51.000Most likely will probably be the most basic one.
01:15:54.000But outside of that, I would just say people's perception of what a relationship is supposed to be, even at this panel.
01:16:02.000I just think the main problem is that it's been too many bad guys that a lot of women run into.
01:16:07.000And so their expectations of what a man specifically is and a man's expectation of what a woman is supposed to be is kind of miscured to the point that we're seeing all these conflict and these issues.
01:16:16.000Like a woman feels like submission is a negative trait to have because they feel like it puts them in a vulnerable position to be hurt.
01:16:23.000And that's only because they've been hurt before.
01:16:25.000And a man feels like to provide for a woman, it makes him a simp because he's been played before and a bitch took his money and ran off.
01:16:32.000So I just think that bad experiences, man, is the main problem with relationship.
01:16:36.000If we actually were good people to each other initially, we wouldn't have this constant trauma.
01:23:59.000The only man that's not superior to you are bad men, which you shouldn't be wasting your time with, of course.
01:24:04.000But if you're around a man that's genuine man, he is your superior.
01:24:07.000There's nothing you can do about that.
01:24:08.000There's nothing, there's nowhere you can show me where a man doesn't excel in a woman that we didn't even give you the position to even attempt.
01:24:16.000I mean, we gave you the right to vote.
01:24:17.000We gave you the right to leave schools.
01:24:18.000Did you women even know that before we gave y'all the right to be teachers, that the education system was much better?
01:24:25.000No, this is not misogynistic propaganda.
01:25:55.000You're here to give air to our children.
01:25:56.000I mean, I'm not going to get into it, but I'm not saying that men are better and women are better, but I just don't feel like men are the superior ones.
01:26:02.000I feel like everybody has an equal view.
01:26:03.000And I'm always going to stick to that.
01:26:23.000You haven't found a woman clearly to put you and put me in with you in the scenario that you could feel like women are women and men, not equal, but we play a big role.
01:26:34.000When I was broke, when I was broke and I was looking for a way when I was still a boy trying to be a man, I found a lot of equals, but they didn't respect me the way they should have.
01:27:57.000But it seems like to me, the woman here at the table that has the parents with the longest marriage is the woman that's doing what the fuck she's supposed to do.
01:28:19.000Like I said, I said, I know my part, but I just like to hear everybody's thing because I saw a meme literally like two days ago and it spoke about that.
01:28:28.000It was like, we came from their rib, but maybe it was because they couldn't last without women.
01:28:34.000If a man doesn't feel that he's superior, he will never secure his woman.
01:28:38.000If a man breaks into the house and we're married and a nigga breaks through our door and I say, baby, the shotgun in the closet, could you please go get and handle that nigga?
01:28:47.000But I'm the type of girl that's going to grab the shotgun.
01:30:56.000But anyhow, women don't like to support women these days, I find.
01:31:00.000So I'm very glad in trying to, you know, along with other women, putting that out there and pushing us to grow and be, you know, more better.
01:31:11.000Well, I will say that having the same baby daddy is not that strange, but doing a podcast together is definitely strange.
01:31:17.000Right, especially coming from our history and you know, the problems that we've been through in the tank, right?