On this episode of the Freshly Fit Podcast, we are joined by 6 lovely ladies to talk about dating, work, and what it's like to be in a monogamous relationship. We hope you enjoy this after-hour edition of the podcast, and if you like what you hear, please HIT SUBSCRIBE on Apple Podcasts or wherever else you get your content! Thanks for listening and Good Luck Out There! -Freshly Fit Team: Rachel, Haley, Rachael, Rajin, Analaura, Alyssa, Kaitlyn, Anais, and Rachelle Aaron C. Boxer Haley - 22 Haley - 23 Rajin - 22 Anais - 22 Rachelle - 23 Rachelle is a graduate student at Nova Southeastern University, working on a Master's Degree in Entrepreneurship, and living in Miami, Florida. She is also a real estate agent, and is in the process of becoming a full-time entrepreneur. Rachel - 21 Anais is a realtor in Miami and is currently working on her Master s degree in Public Health. We also discuss what it means to be a "monogamamorous" in the dating world, and how it's really like being in a relationship with someone who pays the bills. We also talk about what it really is like being a monogamorous, and why it's important to be monogamous in the modern dating world. Aaron - 22 Analis - 23 Analis Rajan - 24 Rachelle, 22 Analis, 23 Analia, 24 Rachel, 25 Rachelleah, 26 Rachel, 27 Rachel, 28 Rachel, 29 Rachel, & Rachel - 29 Rachel - 28 Rachel - 30 Rachel - 31 Rachel - 32 Rachel - 33 Rachel - 34 Rachel - 35 Rachel - 36 Rachel - 37 Rachel - 38 Rachel - 39 Rachel - 40 Rachel - 42 Rachel - 41 Rachel - 43 Rachel - 44 Rachel - 45 Rachel - 46 Rachel - 47 Rachel - 48 Rachel - 49 Rachel - 50 Rachel - 51 Rachel - 52 Rachel - 53 Rachel - - Rachel - 54 Rachel - 55 Rachel - 56 Rachel - 57 Rachel - 58 Rachel - 59 Rachel - 60 Rachel - 61 Rachel - 62 Rachel - 63 Rachel - 65 Rachel - 67 Rachel - 64 Rachel - 68 Rachel - 69 Rachel - 70 Rachel - 73 Rachel - 75 Rachel - 79 Rachel - 76 Rachel - 78 Rachel - 80 Rachel - 90 Rachel - 81 Rachel - 83 Rachel - 88 Rachel - 89 Rachel - 01:00 Rachel - 00:00
00:01:52.000Yes, ladies, Aaron C. Boxer on IG. Make sure if you send me a DM, please, ladies, we don't pay your girls for interviews or anything like that.
00:02:16.000Alright, without further ado, ladies, if you don't mind, give us your name, your age, what you do for a living, dating status, and if you want to, of course, your body count.
00:20:12.000See, it's amazing how it's like, they ask the question, I give my insight, they're like, well, no, that's wrong, and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
00:20:18.000No, no, no, I'm not saying you're wrong, but the 447 you've been, we haven't been doing no damn kegels!
00:21:00.000Not enough for where a girl that's insufferable can say, oh, well, my pussy's that great, where a girl that's pussy might not be as good as she's able to overtake her.
00:21:32.000If your man is a leader, handled all expenses, laid good pipe, and chooses you, would you quit work, stay home, raise a family, and serve him?
00:21:38.000Shout out to the Haitian lady on the panel.
00:21:42.000Okay, so the question again is, if your man is a leader, handle all expenses, laid good pipe, and chooses you, would you quit work, stay home, and raise a family and serve him?
00:22:55.000When I have kids, I want to be able to, you know, I really want to be really intentional with my kids and, you know, stay at home and be with them and do, like, remote work.
00:23:03.000So when I am ready to have kids, like, you know, I will, like, sacrifice that time for them.
00:23:08.000But as soon as they're in school, I'm back at it.
00:28:38.000You hold the house down and when they came in and the guy has that power or authority to change that environment when he comes in so I bring keys.
00:30:18.000Okay, so basically what had happened was is it was something that I was told to say and the cameras were supposed to be off, but then apparently they were recording.
00:30:28.000Then the editing team put it out anyways and then I actually have the messages of me saying why is this out?
00:35:12.000Have you ever thought about maybe, even though you're saying you never actually did it and it's not true, have you ever thought about, you know, it might influence other women to take that step?
00:38:10.000Sorry, that comment just like really hit my heart and just wanted to say that like all love because my boyfriend actually got diagnosed with stage four cancer so I get it.
00:45:14.000So if a girl actually likes you and genuinely desires you and is attracted to you, you don't need to do all that extra shit to get her off.
00:45:21.000You have to do all that extra shit to get her off when she doesn't find you that attractive.
00:46:42.000If she's actually attracted to you and aroused by you and you do what you're supposed to do outside of the bedroom, she's going to be naturally aroused by you.
00:46:48.000You don't have to do all that extra shit.
00:46:49.000And I feel like that's kind of where making love and just fucking comes in.
00:46:52.000You can't just have an orgasm, though.
00:46:54.000Because you can't have, if you love the niggas, you can't have an orgasm.
00:46:59.000You know if you're really that connected?
00:47:00.000Whenever a guy has to do all this extra stuff, it's one of two things.
00:47:05.000Whenever he has to, like, e-box and do all this weird sexual shit with his girl, one of two things.
00:47:09.000Either A, that girl's a whore and is desensitized to sex, or B, she's not that attracted to him in the first place, so he has to do all this extra shit to get her off.
00:48:23.000You want the guy to be taller than you, make more money than you, be more successful than you, be competent, succeed in everything in life, and do all this extra shit?
00:52:11.000Two things that contributed to hurting today's dating marketplace between men and women.
00:52:17.000Okay, so I am a little bit traditional, in which I do believe that, like, the man should take initiative, you know, be able to provide, be able to work.
00:52:27.000And I just feel like nowadays, men just play too many games with different females.
00:52:31.000I mean, like, look at, like, an example, like, the Blue Face, like, Krishan drama.
00:52:34.000Like, I believe that men, you know, like, if you want a female, then you should do everything to, like, pursue her, be able to, like, provide for her.
00:52:41.000It doesn't mean, like, you have to get me, like, bags and all this stuff, but, like, I think?
00:53:01.000You know, I think it also puts us in a masculine role.
00:53:04.000And I think that I also just want to feel, like, feminine.
00:53:07.000And, like, being submissive doesn't mean that you're less.
00:53:09.000You know, it just means that you feel taken care of and you're good and that you want to be nurturing.
00:53:14.000And I just feel like nowadays, like, there's less, like, nurturing coming from women.
00:54:27.000I can work and then go home, take care of the house, cook, take care of the kids.
00:54:31.000That sounds great on paper, but realistically speaking, are you going to do that when you're working a full-time job and you have your own career?
00:54:44.000Yeah, I mean, she wants a traditional guy, but you're not necessarily a tradition yourself, which, I mean, hey, it is what it is, but okay.
00:59:10.000What ended up where he couldn't provide anymore?
00:59:14.000You know, things happened in the world where, you know, things changed and the market changed and stuff, so he wasn't able to, like, you know, work his regular job, so he went back to doing...
01:00:21.000You know, I do that, but it's just, like, women, like, we lie about certain stuff just to be like, okay, we can do this, like, saying, like...
01:00:27.000I'll be okay with someone moving in with somebody.
01:00:30.000I'm not okay with moving in with somebody because I like to be by myself.
01:02:33.000They're not going or pursuing jobs to become in a higher standard.
01:02:38.000And then our parents are telling the females, and like you said, the gender roles have changed.
01:02:43.000Because they're telling you, go seek a career, go seek education so that you can provide for yourself.
01:02:49.000Instead of telling the boys, hey, you know, you're supposed to be the head of the family, go do this and this and this so that your wife could fall in line.
01:04:39.000The guys that you said that you dealt with because you said in your personal experience, what did they do for a living that made them so egotistical?
01:04:45.000Higher earners, successful, famous, what was it?
01:04:48.000So I would argue that it's an earned ego then.
01:05:29.000Talking about someone else's job, talking about somebody else's money, talking about what other people are doing when it's really none of your business and you should really just focus on yourself.
01:05:56.000Men typically have to earn their ability to have an ego because if you're a guy and you haven't accomplished anything, you can't really walk around with an ego because everyone's gonna laugh at you.
01:06:58.000I mean, because a lot of girls get mad when I say, like, we don't really give a shit about female opinions.
01:07:03.000And the reason why is because women tend to look at the world through an emotional lens.
01:07:07.000And when you look at the world through an emotional lens, well, emotions change all the time and they're erratic.
01:07:11.000So do you really want someone that's kind of unstable about how they feel?
01:07:15.000Talking about or giving their opinions on things?
01:07:18.000Sometimes women have like these feelings of like certain things like maybe like something bad is gonna happen and like women will have that like intuition like oh I feel like this is gonna happen and then maybe it does happen and then it's like oh shit like he should have listened you know what I mean like sometimes women have these like feelings so sometimes you know he should listen.
01:07:36.000I think a woman's opinion can be taken into consideration but I think in general the final decision maker should always be the man.
01:07:44.000But I feel like making a woman feel like she doesn't have a voice and she's not heard, like, it's kind of like, it's not something you should do.
01:07:51.000Yeah, you can hear her, but, like, I mean, to take her opinion seriously, I mean, I genuinely think that, you know, it's got to be the guy that makes the final decision.
01:08:13.000There's a difference between giving your take on something and being overly opinionated.
01:08:17.000I think a lot of women are overly opinionated when they haven't really accomplished anything.
01:08:21.000And the reason why guys don't really give a shit about what women have to say most of the time, especially successful men, is because women live life on easy mode.
01:08:29.000Could you imagine every time you had an emotional, I want to say, need, listen to all your needs, versus going out there working, hustling for you and the family?
01:09:30.000What if she consistently feels like you're doing something and you're hearing her like you could be like, you know, I understand this is this is probably why I do that.
01:19:41.000What do both genders need to do to improve the landscape?
01:19:47.000Accountability and being one with thyself and communication.
01:19:52.000Yeah, but how would we actually go about, that all sounds great on paper, but how would we actually implement these things that you're talking about?
01:19:57.000That's where the individual wants to have that willpower to change themselves.
01:20:02.000So if a man or a female understands that, like she said, you need to shut the fuck up and you need to listen to your man, that's where you have to really deep prove yourself with why you don't shut the fuck up.
01:20:33.000Um, put accountability to for women and both for accountability for a man, um, and understanding definition of his role.
01:20:43.000So the leader, like, you know what a protector is, what a man is, not what a woman's going to tell you what a man's supposed to do, provide.
01:21:28.000You always go to your mom for the answers.
01:21:31.000I feel like once you feel wrong or you can't hold the weight, to me, in this generation, you can't hold the weight of a man, it's kind of hard to swallow that pill to say yeah.
01:23:37.000And I feel safe enough to, again, turn off my brain because I know that you know what you're doing.
01:23:43.000And I could just be like, okay, we're going to be fine.
01:23:51.000I think they can be, as long as they know what they're doing, again.
01:23:55.000Some women, I can't speak for all women, but what I can say is that I'm 100% positive that there are many women who can, as long as they're being led and they feel safe.
01:24:08.000Do you think modern women deserve the leadership and protecting and provisioning of a traditional man?
01:24:15.000You can make the argument that if you go back 50, 60, 70 years, women back then were cut from a different cloth.
01:24:22.000They pretty much came ready to go as far as being submissive, being dutiful, understanding what a woman's roles were.
01:24:32.000They didn't get flued out by a bunch of guys.
01:24:34.000They didn't have a bunch of guys in their DMs.
01:24:36.000Women weren't the way that they are now.
01:24:39.000And I look at it like guys have to work 10 times harder For women that are 10 times more ran through, 10 times less submissive, 10 times less dutiful, 10 times less submissive.
01:24:49.000Well, I guess that's like in the internet's fault, right?
01:24:52.000Social media, like it's a big, it's definitely a big issue in today's society.
01:24:57.000Because you're saying you want men to go back to being, you know, traditional and provisioning and protecting.
01:26:17.000It's like women want a traditional guy that's going to have all these conservative values, right?
01:26:21.000But what I'm asking is, what does that guy get back in exchange?
01:26:24.000A woman that was a hoe in her past, or maybe had a hot girl summer, and decided to do things, and then she picks and chooses when she wants to be a lady, shows her body all over the internet, and he's paying full price for something that's been used by other guys for free?
01:27:17.000I feel like if he really loves that woman, and let's say, okay, this is a woman who didn't have a father figure or whatever, like, she's having a little bit of difficulty in, like, those areas.
01:27:31.000Like, if you really love her enough, you can, like, mold her into being that woman for you.
01:27:36.000Because I feel like a lot of women are worth it.
01:27:38.000They just need a little bit of the extra, you know, that, like, little extra push, like, a little extra help, maybe, like, because they don't It's easier to mold a girl that has a lot of sexual experience or a girl that has no sexual experience?
01:28:45.000Not everyone has the guidance that we need.
01:28:47.000Alright, what if a guy that you were seeing, let's say, hypothetically speaking, the guy that you've been with for six years, or maybe another guy that you might have been seeing, what if you found out that he did gay porn when he was in college?
01:30:20.000So therefore, since we're different and we view the world differently, we have different rules and regulations on how we see the opposite gender.
01:30:26.000So, like, you would never accept a guy that did some homosexual stuff in the past.
01:30:43.000So just like you wouldn't want a guy that had a homosexual past, a lot of guys wouldn't want a girl that had a, you know, ran through past.
01:30:48.000Yes, but what I'm trying to explain to you is it's not the same.
01:30:50.000I'm giving you a functional equivalent.
01:33:09.000Yeah, we let women kind of get away with anything.
01:33:11.000Like, if a girl says some wild shit to you and doesn't control her emotions, most guys will be like, oh, it's okay, dear, blah, blah, blah.
01:33:18.000Versus just breaking up with her, getting rid of her, telling her, get the fuck out of my house, don't ever talk to me like that again.
01:33:21.000We don't hold women accountable for their emotional behavior or outbursts.
01:34:58.000But I'm arguing a lot of girls aren't able to control and the reason why is because we don't punish women for not controlling their emotions like we have it where we literally have we encourage women to be loud obnoxious yell at their man you know We don't do that over here.
01:35:22.000Okay, just because you don't do it doesn't necessarily mean it isn't encouraged by society for women to behave a certain way.
01:35:28.000We absolutely encourage and tell women to be loud, be obnoxious, be erratic, etc.
01:35:34.000That's why stereotypes exist with a certain communita, if you know what I'm saying, or a certain group of people because we encourage that type of behavior In society.
01:35:43.000Even in public, let's say, for example, you're out with your boyfriend, you get emotional.
01:35:48.000Why are you shouting at him in public?
01:36:03.000And they've done experiments with this on YouTube.
01:36:05.000Like, they'll have a woman berating a man, yelling at him, even hitting him.
01:36:08.000And everyone automatically, no one says shit, everyone just keeps about their day, whatever, because they assume, oh, the guy deserved it.
01:36:13.000But as soon as a guy raises his wife, raises his voice, you know, in public at a woman, people are breaking it up, they're stopping it, etc.
01:36:21.000So, there's checks and balances on male aggression, but there isn't checks and balances on female aggression, is my point.
01:36:26.000Do you think that maybe it's because a man could really fuck the bitch up and a girl can't really fuck him up like that?
01:36:32.000That's understandable, but what I'm saying now is that we've overcorrected to a point where abuse on men is absolutely, like, no one gives a shit about it.
01:36:40.000It's not even, they look at it like it's not even a thing.
01:36:43.000And matter of fact, and I'll be honest, like, women are more violent than people want to admit.
01:36:47.000The highest cases of domestic violence actually come out of lesbian couples.
01:36:59.000ESPN will sit there and cover any time an NFL player or NBA player gets into domestic altercation with their significant other, but they don't cover all the times WNBA players are beating the shit out of their spouses.
01:37:10.000WNBA players are beating up their girls every other chick, but no one gives a fuck about WNBA. But my point is, is that you got professional female athletes literally fighting every other day getting arrested.
01:37:21.000No one talks about that, though, or covers it.
01:37:24.000So, I would argue that women tend to exercise violence more than men sometimes.
01:37:29.000Because women don't understand, don't have an appropriate concept of violence in their mind.
01:37:34.000Maybe because like the women in lesbian relationships, they want to like take on that manly role so bad and they feel like in their mind that a manly role is an aggressive role.
01:37:43.000So maybe that's why that rate is so high.
01:37:46.000I think it's a combination of being emotionally erratic, you know, yeah, the confusion of who's going to be the masculine in the relationship.
01:37:53.000And then on top of that, a lot of women don't have a proper concept of violence.
01:38:27.000That's a very feminine thing to do, right?
01:38:30.000Marquette, actually, shout out to him.
01:38:31.000They had little boys play and little girls play.
01:38:33.000He referred to the study where with the boys, the boys immediately would play sports and there was a winner and a loser and it'd be competitive.
01:38:40.000With the women, though, they would play games like hopscotch or Patty cake or dolls or whatever the fuck, where there was no clear and concise winner.
01:38:46.000So the way men and women play, even in their childhood, shows that men from early ages understand a meritocracy.
01:40:11.000What I've realized with girls, we've interviewed over 2,500 now, they put more stake in how a message is conveyed versus the message itself.
01:40:18.000It's not what you said, it's how you said it, which is a very low IQ way.
01:40:24.000I think in this podcast, we both have men and women, and we're speaking about a topic.
01:40:28.000Yeah, but what I'm trying to say is that the message a lot of times doesn't get to women because they're more concerned with how the message is conveyed.
01:40:33.000The way men communicate versus women is like, men are very direct, like, this is what it is.
01:40:37.000Women are like, I need it to be said to me in a certain way for me to absorb it.
01:40:59.000If she's speaking to you, you're erratic and aggressive, you're not really going to hear it because you're like, which were you talking to?
01:41:04.000If she loves you so much and she's coming to you and you're like...
01:41:08.000Yeah, but the difference is that men and women are not equal.
01:41:28.000Would you talk to your boss like that?
01:41:30.000Most women would not, but they'll talk to their husband that way, or their boyfriend that way, or their man that way, and I look at it like, you know, that's why I'm not a fan of women entering the workplace, because a woman can't serve two masters.
01:41:45.000Yeah, but see, a lot of women will put their career first.
01:41:49.000But what I'm saying is that we are not the same.
01:41:51.000If I speak to you in a certain way and I'm direct and concise and I tell you what the issue is, that's not the same as you being erratic and talking back to me.
01:44:54.000Again, like I said before, the whole conversation started because I said women have an issue with the way messages are conveyed versus the message itself, which is why so many girls don't like the message that we have here because we're pretty direct and concise as to what, you know, women do wrong in relationships and why,
01:45:09.000to be honest, a lot of women don't deserve a relationship.
01:45:11.000And they don't like it because it doesn't, you know, appease their ego and stuff.
01:45:15.000But I would say that, you know, a lot of Western women are not worthy of relationship.
01:45:39.000My environment directly reflects my workload, right?
01:45:44.000If I'm a loser, I'm reminded every day I'm a loser.
01:45:46.000My friends don't respect me, bitches don't want to fuck me, no one wants to talk to me.
01:45:49.000But a woman, however, a lot of times, smoke weed, loser, doesn't do shit, doesn't have any drive to be a better woman or improve herself or be submissive, dutiful, loud, obnoxious, ho, but she still gets treated well.
01:47:59.000Keep the place clean, cooking clean from anything that he has, like a weak point, you're coming in and you're augmenting it.
01:48:05.000Notice, maybe for example, he likes to have coffee in the morning and he doesn't necessarily get the coffee all the time or doesn't have time to make it.
01:48:12.000He wakes up and it's on the coffee side.
01:49:12.000Not dressing provocatively without that man's authority to some degree.
01:49:18.000Asking him for permission to do things.
01:49:20.000What if he's okay with the way you dress because maybe your career, let's say for example, you're an artist, so you're like, what if he's okay with that?
01:49:35.000No guy's okay with his chick dressing provocatively without him being there and being involved in certain industries that they're going to be surrounded by men, man.
01:54:24.000As a warning for you ladies, just so you guys know, fraud is one of the fastest growing crimes in the United States, and they're cracking down on that shit.
01:59:22.000Question, she says, can everybody, including Myron and Fresh, please name two females and two males in their lives that they genuinely respect?
02:00:29.000My mother and my dad around that, well, maybe a year before that broke it off, but he's like a real, real man, like a really good role model.
02:10:47.000I'm just gonna make sure I have everyone's answers here correctly You're saying have a conversation and figure it out, and then you're saying...
02:10:53.000No, like, have a conversation to find out, like, if it's something, like, her health, something with her health, or, like, is she fucking someone else?
02:11:24.000Maybe she mentally checked out, which kind of...
02:11:29.000Does not make her wet anywhere for him.
02:11:31.000So I think we do need a backstory because maybe he has done something or there's been too much going on where she's probably not mentally there and she probably just needs to have sex with him once a month just to satisfy him, not even for herself.
02:13:47.000She doesn't like you that much and you're offering her some kind of commodity that she can't necessarily deal without so she's giving you the bare minimum to continue to keep you on the string.
02:16:35.000I mean, the truth is, like, a lot of girls sit there and think, like, I'm special, I'm different, like, you know, you guys aren't really that unique.
02:16:44.000So, like, they're just not, like, no woman is special, unique, nothing.
02:16:49.000I'm not saying that, but women have an over-inflated sense of self-worth in general.
02:16:52.000They tend to think that they're special and that they bring something different to the table, but in general, most women are very similar, just like most men are similar.
02:16:59.000If you want to test your might, Don't give your boyfriend sex for like three months.
02:20:33.000The reality is you're putting yourself out there with your sexuality because it's going to get you noticed, which will then give people a chance to listen to your music.
02:20:43.000You understand that, okay, I need to market myself a certain way.
02:20:46.000As a female, I need to market my sexuality.
02:30:05.000And guys, just so y'all know, if you guys want to go ahead and cut the line and be able to get your chat shown on screen, go join Castle Club, man.
02:30:31.000How you claim you only have three bodies, but talking about how you can learn from your mistakes took all of a few minute search to know you full of cap fake Nicki Minaj.
02:36:34.000Ladies, I have a couple of reading literature recommendations for you all, created by great prophets, the Holy Bible, the Quran, the Torah, and, of course, yours truly, why women deserve less.
02:39:28.000Like, if he wants to debate, we can have a debate, but bro, these tradcons don't know what they're talking about when it comes to dating in 2023.
02:41:49.000How come women will tell a man who wants to cheat to just break up then, but when a man tells a woman who's being abused to just break up then, it all of a sudden isn't easy for her to do?
02:44:37.000I'm happy, because I didn't know that you guys were doing that, what is it, like a little show that you said where you're helping men kind of improve themselves?
02:44:46.000Yeah, we do a daytime show on entrepreneurship, making money, getting girls.
02:44:49.000I think that's amazing, especially because hearing your perspective on things and how you think things should be done, because I, too, agree with them.
02:44:56.000So I feel like that's really, really good.
02:45:31.000Yeah, it was definitely a bit much, you know, and it shouldn't I shouldn't have even like allowed someone else to be able to have that much control over me to tell me to say that.
02:45:41.000So what can you take it back if you could?
02:45:44.000Yeah, I would take it back even though it created opportunities for you to do interviews and stuff Yeah, because shit, when you're a star, opportunities will always come flying, especially to me.
02:47:57.000Like I said before, guys, we got to wrap these things up a little bit sooner because, you know, Obviously, girls gotta get places and shit like that.
02:48:09.000You know Chromaz is better and you know you called fake charges on a man and didn't like the heat, now trying to back it off, stay in Miami.
02:48:17.000You have anything you want to say back to Lex Shadow?
02:48:20.000I mean, I don't really give a fuck what they say about this person, that person, this person.
02:48:25.000At the end of the day, like, I'm here, you're watching me, you're still on here.
02:48:28.000It's been a minute, so you must really like me.
02:48:31.000You wanna watch me, baby, or else you'd be watching that girl, right?