This week on Off The Lawn, I talk about my recent trip to the Proud Boys meetup, why I don't like selfies, and why you shouldn't even be allowed to take a picture of me if you hate me. I also talk about Sean King and why he's probably not black. I also discuss why I think it's a good idea to dress up in blackface for Halloween. And I give my thoughts on the new Sean King song, Blackface . Also, I discuss a guy who calls himself "Black" and calls himself a "Jussie Smollett type of guy. And I ask the question, is that a good thing or a bad thing? And then I get into the conspiracy theory that Sean King is not black at all, and it's because he wrote nigga on his forehead. on the back of his head. I don t know what that means, but I can tell you it's not good. If you like conspiracy theories, you're in for a treat. I'm going to tell you what it means, and you're not going to like it. You're not gonna like it, you won't like it and you'll be the first to know that I'm not a racist, racist, homophobe who writes nigger on your forehead, right? I'll tell you why you should not be a racist. and why it's better than a black person who writes nigger on his head like that says niggas or a black guy who wears blackface. or black face. It's not blackface, it means he's not a nigger. . And if you don't know who he is black, you don t need to be a nigga with a black face, then you re not a real nigger, but he's a niggot not a black person, right?! I'm sorry for not being a black, but that's what you need to know about it, brotha . . . I hope you enjoy this episode of Off The Lawn, bro it's gonna be a good one, bro! thanks for listening, brozz xoxo. - P.S. I'll be back next week! -Jon Sorrentino - Jon & Sarah Jon
Transcript
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00:01:43.000Like, I want to get a piece of your soul.
00:01:45.000And I'll tell you what, it kind of does chip away at your soul.
00:01:48.000Maybe I believe the the Hundu Kubu tribe of Papua New Guinea, where they thought you shouldn't have your picture taken because it takes away part of your soul.
00:01:58.000Because you go to something like CPAC or one of these events and you do, or that Night of Freedom with Mike Cernovich, where I did a terrible speech at the end.
00:02:08.000And I think it's because I was just like usurped.
00:02:10.000Same with, actually same with the Tommy Robinson thing in UK where I did a terrible speech.
00:03:08.000He looks like the fat Jewish, but as a little side note, I think this guy recognize... I've seen this before with some dudes, where they have some beigeness in them, so they call themselves black.
00:03:17.000I personally, and I have no evidence of this, do not believe that he's black, besides the Jeremy dad.
00:03:23.000I think he's just beige, calls himself black, and then makes that the thing.
00:03:27.000And I saw some article we wrote, he wrote schwarza on his forehead, and said, schwarza doesn't mean black in the Jewish community, it means nigger.
00:03:35.000So, if you're not black and you write nigger on your forehead, you were really going for it.
00:03:41.000That's why, like with Sean King, I almost admire him for the hubris.
00:03:47.000Because I've heard, I've heard Sean King in interviews say, you know, in high school, a lot of these niggers were saying that I'm blacker than them.
00:04:08.000I always wonder with Sean King, you know that time where you're just falling asleep and you think crazy thoughts and you get, sometimes you get super paranoid and like, what if my house was made of melba toast?
00:04:21.000What if it was built the day before I bought it as a joke and I got ripped off?
00:04:25.000And then, you know, the next morning or you have these two sort of as you're waking up and then you have coffee and a piece of cold pizza and you go, what the hell was I just thinking?
00:05:13.000So you get up right now, you get on a plane, you head to Dallas, drive out for a little bit, couple hours, put on some boots, a hat, and just go, a lot of these cowboys say I'm more cowboy than they ever been.
00:05:25.000I mean, A, you're worried about someone googling you, and they already found pictures of Sean as a kid, and he's white as a piece of bread.
00:05:33.000I was gonna say toast, but toast gets pretty brown.
00:05:37.000So one, you're worried about people going, yeah, you know that guy who come down, talking about randling cattle and kept getting the terms wrong?
00:05:58.000Even when I'm in England sometimes, I get so sick of their fucking accents, I'm not talking about one in particular, just different accents, that I have to go into the bathroom of the pub and look at myself in the mirror and go, hello, the rain in Spain falls mainly on the plain, this is a normal accent, here's someone saying,
00:06:14.000That something should be printed right now.
00:06:34.000No, he's like, yo, basically, he does that thing that some black guys do where they try to sound more erudite than they are, and it's like, if you will, we are trying to set up a situation where the, there's like, remember that debate that What's-His-Name did with Jordan Peterson?
00:06:50.000And he does all this stupid weird preacher talk where he's like, we are basically systematically trying to reguiltify what is happening in our society today.
00:06:58.000And Jordan Peterson, I look across at you and I see an angry white man who is scared of his surroundings.
00:07:03.000And I'll tell you what, I will surround you, I will envelop you, I will change you with my words.
00:07:10.000You know, that would sound cool with a beat, but I don't know what the fuck you're talking about.
00:07:30.000It was on Big League Politics, if you want to look it up.
00:07:33.000I think, it's just my guess, that he's a Hispanic guy, Jewish guy, pretending to be black, writing about what it's like being a black American, black Jewish American, yo.
00:07:43.000I'm basically Lenny Kravitz and rain is coming down upon me.
00:08:29.000was on his or her way to committing genocide.
00:08:33.000So they make this Bigfoot boogeyman, like, hi, I'm a Nazi, and I'm planning a Holocaust, obviously, involving Jews, gypsies, clowns, gays.
00:08:43.000I'm going to use the Jacob Javits Center to gas them all.
00:08:47.000So if that archetype actually existed, and I want to kill Mexican children, and I want to separate them from their families and put them in internment camps, OK, you got a point.
00:09:12.000So you may it's kind of like it goes back to this sort of evangelicals like I actually know this guy He's he's not a bad guy.
00:09:19.000He's kind of a fun guy to hang out with but he's a preacher in Harlem I had him on my old show and he thinks Obama made AIDS in the gut the government made AIDS to and gay Sorry, sorry the Obama made homosexuals.
00:09:32.000I don't know if they're robots or what He made them to ruin black families by making gay men black men become gays That's what that's what Obama's up to
00:11:00.000into thinking that white supremacists, which is a remarkably bizarre belief, you know, white supremacists and Nazis, not just Nazis too, not just like a crazy guy who wears the uniform that he bought on eBay or something.
00:11:15.000Oh, I don't think you can buy them on eBay.
00:12:51.000Now it's, you don't support a insurance plan that is a little more benevolent, though alarmingly expensive and potentially cost prohibitive.
00:13:21.000You remember Black Lives Matter was going into brunches and screaming at people having brunch because they were having brunch, and I guess brunch is built on slavery or something.
00:13:30.000I'm just toiling in them fields, cutting down them eggs.
00:13:35.000Wee-oh, cutting up that bacon, making that breakfast for 400 years from now.
00:14:40.000This booing and screaming at everyone, middle-aged woman going to get a sandwich with their dad, this will be gone in a couple days.
00:14:48.000Although I am starting to read with a lot of the more beta the blogger is, the more impassioned his manifesto is about how we have to fight back against the bourgeoisie and burn their mansions to the ground and take their wealth and give it to the proletariat.
00:15:53.000They'll stab you and they don't care if they go to jail.
00:15:56.000I've been talking to some cops recently and they go, shit is going down.
00:16:01.000They said, all this, like, fuck the cops stuff has led to a lot less policing, because people don't want to get sued, and fine, you don't want me here, I won't come here.
00:16:21.000In a town, I think it's a third of the size of New York, and we're at one a day.
00:16:27.000And then we just had the Trinitarios, this Dominican gang, rip a kid, who wanted to be a cop, by the way, rip a kid out of a bodega and chop him up with machetes because they thought he was in a porn with a Trinitario chick.
00:16:38.000And then they go, oh, sorry, wrong guy.
00:16:40.000And then they brag about it on social media, going, fuck you, pigs, you won't catch me.
00:16:45.000So the police just caught them all and arrested them.
00:16:48.000By the way, I'm not disparaging the Trinitarios in any way.
00:17:36.000So yeah, like nine... I think there was ten people that confronted me there, and nine were great, and then one was the lunatic screaming at the kids and then running away.
00:17:45.000But the other time was at an airport in London, and I fetishized the sort of mod skinhead culture of the early 80s, and so I had been shopping till I dropped.
00:17:59.000And I had slim-fit Brutus, and I had Dennis the Menace kind of Beano clothes, and I had new Doc Martens shoes without the stitching.
00:18:05.000You can't wear stitching after 30, by the way.
00:19:11.000Or you see Antifa going to beat up Proud Boys like Tiny Toetze, uh, from Samoa, and he just destroyed, like, he punches them, sends them down, and you can see them on the ground going, and you realize, oh, that's your first punch!
00:19:26.000Because we've all had our, well, I shouldn't say we've all had, but you, anyone who's had their first punch goes, oh yeah, it's a wake-up call.
00:19:32.000Then you go, oh yeah, there's consequences for my actions.
00:19:36.000I remember vividly calling this kid Marty, Farty Marty, when I was maybe eight.
00:19:42.000And he was riding a unicycle, which, believe it or not, was cool in 1978.
00:19:47.000And he got off his unicycle and just chased me, caught me, and pounded me in the head.
00:19:51.000And I went, oh, you can't just yell shit at random dudes that are way older than you, even if it rhymes with fart.
00:20:00.000And I don't think this generation has got it.
00:20:02.000The way these women behave, like someone was harassing a friend of mine, trying to get him fired, and I had my lawyer track her down, and he said, you're gonna be monetarily responsible for this if you get him fired for the rest of your life.
00:20:15.000And the way we'll calculate it is how long you would have worked there.
00:20:19.000She starts crying, gets her parents involved, shuts down her social media.
00:20:27.000Like, you go up to someone, you slap them,
00:20:30.000You're going to get slapped back like when these I'm sorry to keep repeating myself because I talked about this on the show But you show up to a fight with a baseball bat Okay, now it's we're in the baseball leagues Like that this tiny little skinny Asian girl called for Steven Crowder to be firebombed Okay, so now you can we can call on you to be firebombed you realize like when you say harass this person's family We're gonna find your family and harass your family things don't happen in an abyss.
00:21:43.000They kick someone in the balls, Johnny Knoxville and those boys, they get kicked in the balls.
00:21:47.000They're always kicking each other in the balls.
00:21:49.000Johnny Knoxville's sperm, by the way, all the little fish, individual sperms through a microscope, they all look like they just got beat up by a gang of skinheads.
00:21:57.000And I believe it's for kicking in balls.
00:21:59.000And I hadn't made my kids when I was hanging out with those guys, and I fucking, I would get so mad.
00:22:02.000I'd say, don't you dare go near these fucking, these things are, you're killing babies.
00:22:08.000And unlike the left, I don't advocate for that.
00:22:16.000So yeah, there's a strange arrogance from these fuckers.
00:22:20.000And it's based on a myth that Trump is Hitler, and anyone who likes him is Hitler.
00:22:49.000Actually, we sort of got together when I was on Ecstasy, and I thought she was a lot prettier than she was and a lot more interesting.
00:22:55.000We had this super romantic night, and then it was long distance and stuff, and then I got to know her, and I noticed she was kind of balding.
00:23:02.000That's a pretty serious deal-breaker, ladies.
00:25:30.000So just ignore that ladies ignore that part but the one thing we do all agree on is when the hair is like You could take a pen and draw something in between the hairs like a little tiny smiley face Or anything really if you could if you can write Johnny rotten in between hairs We got a we're out.
00:25:51.000I'm sorry you can wear a hat and you can put a barrette on it, but
00:27:30.000And I spent half the movie staring at her head.
00:27:33.000I just thought, Jesus Christ, we're staring at not just our only deal breaker, but one of the worst examples of it in the history of man.
00:27:46.000Like, she wasn't some old lady who had a big wart on her nose.
00:27:50.000Oh, by the way, that's another one I don't really mind, but I don't get these women with giant warts and giant moles, like the kind that you can almost pull them off.
00:28:00.000How can you not just have that taken off?
00:28:04.000I mean, there's a weird thing there where, say you do that, like, say your nose is as big as a computer, and you go and get it fixed, and then someone marries you, then your kids have these giant noses.
00:28:19.000Because part of our attraction, and this isn't conscious, this is evolutionary, it's in our subconscious, part of our attraction to attractive people, male and female, is I'm gonna make more beautiful people, and we'll be beautiful and popular, and we'll make the beautiful, beautiful, beautiful.
00:28:34.000That's why no one wants to fuck Danny DeVito, because they don't want some ugly little short, bald kid.
00:28:40.000But if Danny DeVito's on stilts, and he's wearing a wig,
00:28:45.000And then you breed with him, and then a little ugly Danny DeVito comes out.
00:29:23.000And they marry like the hottest one they can, and then the kids come out ugly or with a giant computer-sized nose, and they go, what the fuck is with my daughter's nose?
00:29:32.000And she goes, oh yeah, I forgot to mention, I used to be a toucan.
00:29:36.000I was actually on the Froot Loops box, nude, wearing wings.
00:29:46.000So anyway, to go back to the woman in the theater,
00:29:50.000I guess she should have, uh... I guess she should have... I guess she should have gone and got plugs, and then when she met a guy, go, bye-bye.
00:29:59.000If we have a girl, she's gonna have the most disgusting deal-breaker hair in the world, and have trouble getting a guy, and then she'll have to go.
00:30:07.000Actually, isn't this the truth with these Long Island Jewish girls, who, like, 80% seem to get nose jobs?
00:30:14.000And then their daughters get nose jobs and their daughters get nose jobs?
00:31:47.000Out in the burbs than it is in Manhattan.
00:31:49.000And in Manhattan, you feel like you're at a class called How to Fuck Eva Mendes.
00:31:54.000And you're just like, this is... I get it all.
00:31:56.000And, you know, you talk to her and you buy her flowers or whatever, and you show up to, like, her premiere, but it's never gonna happen.
00:32:03.000But this is, like, how to fuck the girl next door when she's super drunk, and you guys have been getting along great, and she's lonely, and you're not ugly.
00:32:14.000You're like, I think I can pull this off.
00:33:59.000But I've noticed even like with cops when they show me their holsters, because having We The People holsters and being new to all this, I'm learning that the whole thing about being able to quickly re-holster, a lot of cops have floppy holsters that don't look that aerodynamic.
00:35:26.000The only time you feel bad is if you pummel some innocent person that didn't deserve it or you didn't pick on someone your own size and you just annihilated him and you totally humiliated him in front of his girlfriend.
00:36:32.000Oh my god, I'd be telling my grandchildren that awesome story about how me and Don Cherokee, mankiller aho, beat the living shit out of 12 skinheads.
00:37:25.000And sometimes your friend will remind you of one and you go, oh shit, yeah.
00:37:29.000Yeah, that ended up becoming a fight, didn't it?
00:37:31.000But with the fight where you should have fought and you didn't fight, oh my God, it is engraved in steel on a plaque on your wall in the I'm a Pussy Hall of Fame.
00:37:42.000So guys, if there's a situation where you should be violent, some lady's getting accosted, just pick yourself up by the scruff of your neck.
00:37:55.000Put your hands on the back of your back and shove yourself in there and go, do it pussy.
00:38:01.000And maybe it'll only last three seconds.
00:38:02.000You just, you have to have done something.
00:38:05.000And even if he beats the crap out of you, that's fine.
00:38:10.000Which, of course, we see in the trailer for UPGRADE, where he lets the computer take over because he's losing and then he kicks the guy's ass!
00:38:19.000Maybe that's the only thing you regret more than not justified violence, not fighting someone you should have fought, is when UPGRADE was in theaters, and you just let it drift away to the ghetto, and now you have to wait for fucking On Demand.
00:38:33.000Folks, please go to CRTV.com and register for my two shows, Get Off My Lawn and CRTV Tonight with Gavin McInnes.
00:38:42.000We have a special July 4th episode coming up on July 6th, all devoted to the bonnie old US of A. I had kind of an epiphany.
00:38:48.000I don't want to give away my monologue.
00:38:51.000But Kurt Schiller is going to be on the show.
00:38:55.000But my epiphany I had was the Americans didn't kick the British out in 1776.