Get Off My Lawn Podcast #101 | I hate "hate has no home here" signs
Episode Stats
Length
1 hour and 3 minutes
Words per Minute
171.03209
Summary
On this episode of Thick & Thin, the boys talk about hate, tattoos, and the Orlando nightclub massacre. Also, we talk about how racist the media is and why they don t give a fuck about anything other than their own biases and their own prejudices. Also, it's a good thing we don't talk about the Orlando shooting or the West Side Highway, because that would have been a whole lot worse. Enjoy the episode and don't forget to SUBSCRIBE on Apple Podcasts or wherever else you get your stuff! Logo by Courtney DeKorte. Theme by Mavus White. Music by PSOVOD and tyops. The opinions stated here are our own, not those of our companies, and do not represent those of any other companies or organizations. All rights reserved. Used by permission. This episode was produced and edited by Riley Bray. We do not own the rights to any music used in this episode. All credit goes to original artists and music used on this episode, unless otherwise stated. Thank you for any amount you choose to pay for the use of music and production. If you enjoyed the music, please leave us a review and/or review in the comments section below. It helps us to support our efforts to make this podcast a better and more accessible to more people listening to this podcast. Please be kind and spread the word to your friends and family about the podcast. Thank you and support us in any way you can do so. Love & support us. XOXOXO. - Thank you. xoxo -Davids -Alyssa -R.J. -A.S. -P.A. -S.R. -J.M. -C. -D.V. -K. -M.P. -LJ.B. -E. -BJ. & J.J., C.S -PJ.E. & A.SJ. & K.M., EJ.C. & D. . -PZ. -G. -F.A., S.S., M.AJ.H. -T. -V.A -SZN. - A.A.. -B.R., P.M.. & P.B., R.S, S.J..A. & C.E., D.J, C.W. -YVY, J.W., E.A.?
Transcript
00:00:04.000
There's so much I can say about these signs that I don't even know where to begin.
00:00:33.000
But secondly, as far as what you're supposed to interpret from that, I guess it means like, I don't have like the Klan in my home.
00:00:49.000
Like, you're saying when you have kids around, because everyone in the suburbs has kids in their home, right?
00:00:55.000
So when you have kids around, you're not walking around the house yelling the N-word and playing like Johnny Rebel and Screwdriver.
00:01:05.000
I cannot believe there are several articles out there that claim I have a Screwdriver tattoo.
00:01:19.000
I have a woman's symbol on my arm with an E on it for equality.
00:01:26.000
I also have a skull that's made from a bone from a woman who was killed in a sati fire.
00:01:43.000
But one of them says, arm your desires in Urdu.
00:01:49.000
Indian, East Indian language, Urdu, Hindu language.
00:01:54.000
And then it has a gun and these hands, blue hands, right?
00:02:09.000
I have a, I have my entire back has a jellyfish with a skull on it eating Chunkai Shek and Fidel Castro.
00:02:17.000
With destruction, creative destruction written above it in Chinese.
00:02:24.000
I was singing in punk bands and assumed that would be my life.
00:02:27.000
I didn't know I'd be at a water park with my three kids looking like a circus freak.
00:02:34.000
But anyway, these nuts, these weirdo beta male journalists are obsessed with proving I'm racist.
00:02:44.000
They're not interested in the Pulse shooting or the West Side Highway.
00:02:50.000
No one ever says, what about the West Side Highway?
00:02:54.000
I was just on Proud Boy Magazine reading a great article.
00:02:57.000
I don't know who's writing for that, but he's talented.
00:03:02.000
And they're listing the names of the people who died.
00:03:05.000
I think it was about eight people who died on the West Side Highway.
00:03:10.000
Heather Heyer, that's a terrible catastrophe, obviously.
00:03:31.000
My hand, oh yeah, so the white power tattoo they're saying is, I have these blue hands holding a lightning bolt.
00:03:36.000
Apparently, there was a newsletter in the 80s that had a hand holding a lightning bolt.
00:03:43.000
Hands holding lightning bolts are all over the place.
00:03:48.000
It tends to just mean, like, mighty or something.
00:03:54.000
Anyway, to get back to, hey, there's no home here.
00:04:00.000
Why don't you have a sign on your lawn that says rape has no home here?
00:04:21.000
Like these guys, Christopher Mateus, Devin Voshart, Will Sommer, Jared Holt, Vic Berger.
00:04:29.000
They're going through every sock in my dirty laundry trying to find a swastika.
00:04:37.000
And you think, okay, I understand you probably are autistic or you're a beta male who wants to make up for your lack of testosterone.
00:04:48.000
Or what about, what about, um, uh, black racists?
00:04:55.000
Like the Black Liberation Army, I think they're called.
00:04:58.000
What about gangs that, you know, when they flash, like the hand symbol means like a lot to them.
00:05:01.000
When you do that okay sign, that triggers them incredibly, but there'll be gang signs, like in music videos that are on MTV that you could just.
00:05:16.000
About 20 black men are murdered every fucking day.
00:05:27.000
And the fact that we have all of these fatherless children going through this prison industrial complex.
00:05:36.000
In a way, it's a form of, as this article said on Proud Boy Magazine, it's a form of white supremacy because you hold whites to a higher standard and you kind of ignore problems with blacks.
00:05:47.000
You ignore black murder because it's uncomfortable to you.
00:05:55.000
These virtue signalers, these social justice warriors are racist.
00:05:59.000
Feels like they're saying, they don't know any better.
00:06:03.000
Like blacks, blacks, I mean, they're, they're just going to kill each other, whatever.
00:06:10.000
So they should be, they should be held to a higher standard.
00:06:17.000
I think one of the problems might be I'm Canadian and, uh, we, I'm from Quebec and
00:06:34.000
So, in fact, we have rules in bars where we go, can we not talk about fucking language, please?
00:06:40.000
I'm sick of talking about French versus English and separatism.
00:07:27.000
Fantastic gigantic tits and a tiny little white mustache.
00:07:36.000
You ain't seen nothing till you check out Quebec.
00:07:44.000
You know when you're 14 you grow your first mustache?
00:07:54.000
I don't know if he has a girlfriend or a boyfriend or how he fucks or if he has a penis or what is going on with that guy.
00:08:01.000
His gender, there's a new gender just for him it's called Paula Deen.
00:08:09.000
I'm confused by all these sort of weird genders because
00:08:16.000
I'm attracted to gorgeous hunks with pecs and stuff.
00:08:19.000
Actually, you know what I was thinking the other day?
00:08:21.000
If I was a woman, I don't think I'd be attracted to male models.
00:08:30.000
Like, as a straight male, I'm not just, I'm not attracted, like, Ariana Grande, sure, she's pretty, whatever.
00:08:38.000
I'm attracted to, and maybe it's because I'm 48, a little bit of filth.
00:08:43.000
Like a zit on an ass, some, a lot of guys are very specific about nipples.
00:08:51.000
Like you were talking the other day about how some chick had gross areolas.
00:09:02.000
Like, you know, they say smelling a woman's ass is a poor man's viagra.
00:09:08.000
And I want, if I was to get divorced, I would marry a woman similar to my age.
00:09:18.000
Although I think she's had some surgery recently that looks confusing.
00:09:23.000
Um, so I think if I was a chick, I would be kind of into like a gross dude.
00:09:33.000
But like a guy who was kind of fat and had a mustache and maybe was even balding.
00:09:44.000
Cause you're not attracted, like you don't want perfect pecs and like a Brad Pitt guy.
00:09:51.000
And you're not attracted to female characteristics.
00:09:55.000
Like if I was, if I was, uh, if I was a chick, I wouldn't want a shaved chest.
00:10:12.000
And don't bring up pictures when we're on an audio podcast.
00:10:19.000
I think I would rather be fucked by Tony Soprano than Brad Pitt.
00:10:34.000
They're just probably, you know, they're probably easier to get along with too.
00:10:40.000
I mean, men, the male mystique, like God made this very clear when he made the scrotum.
00:10:45.000
He said, I officially don't want you guys to be attractive.
00:11:14.000
It really means, it's actually quite symbolic of where we are as a country.
00:11:19.000
What it really means is white supremacy is on the rise and it's been emboldened by Trump.
00:11:28.000
Uh, hate has no home here means that I recognize a growing pattern of hate in this country.
00:11:34.000
Racism, anti-semitism, bigotry, anti-trans, homophobia is growing here and it's because of Trump.
00:11:43.000
And I think a lot of them cite these FBI stats that it's up something like 15%, but that stat is fucked.
00:11:54.000
For example, they say anti-Semitism is on the rise.
00:11:58.000
A lot of that is based on this one Israeli teen with mental problems who Crank called a bunch of synagogues.
00:12:15.000
There was one case in Brooklyn at a park where someone spray-painted these terrible swastikas, like just scribbles, and then it said, Go Trump beneath it.
00:12:53.000
500 people all showed up at this park where some dumb teenager, I'm convinced it's a hate crime hoax, but say it wasn't, some dumb teenager spray painted something on like a kid's park on a slide and they all come together and hold hands to fight back the racism.
00:13:28.000
I would wager that spiders are a bigger threat to America than Nazis.
00:13:34.000
Now, Islam, the numbers are kind of low of jihadists.
00:13:40.000
Like, there's some annoying Muslim activist who points out that more people get killed by furniture than Muslims.
00:13:47.000
The numbers are comparable, by the way, which isn't good because furniture is every fucking where.
00:13:53.000
I'm leaning on furniture and I'm sitting on furniture.
00:13:59.000
And a lot of Americans die from water every year.
00:14:01.000
But to say that Islam is as much of a threat as water is a stretch.
00:14:10.000
Actually, white supremacists are a bigger threat.
00:14:16.000
And you go, I can sit on an armchair in my home and just mentally go through San Bernardino, the Pulse shooting, the West Side Highway.
00:14:27.000
They always started on September 12th, 2001, to avoid that pesky 3000.
00:14:33.000
And then there's other things like the beheading in Oklahoma.
00:14:41.000
Or Fort Hood, where that guy shot his fellow soldiers.
00:14:47.000
And then they take any redneck who shot his brother for fucking his wife.
00:14:52.000
Or they'll take a bomb threat, where we don't know if it was a hoax or not, and they'll call that white supremacy.
00:15:01.000
So these signs, when you see them, they don't...
00:15:06.000
I don't think the people who put them up know what they mean.
00:15:08.000
In fact, I went into a store recently and I said it was a carpet store and they did my home's runners.
00:15:15.000
By the way, little side note, the fucking craftsmanship of these guys is just breathtaking.
00:15:29.000
Carpet going through my hallways and up my stairs.
00:15:40.000
And these guys managed to maintain the pattern of the hexagons up the stairs, down the hall.
00:15:48.000
This is a big problem with society, by the way.
00:15:52.000
Like, when we were skiing the other day in that chair at Okimo,
00:16:00.000
Do you know how many millions of years it would take us to synthesize that ourselves?
00:16:05.000
Like, build me a chairlift with a orange plastic dome covering it.
00:16:12.000
You know how many machines are involved in creating that fucking masterpiece that took us up a mountain?
00:16:18.000
And labs to make that perfect fiberglassy hood?
00:16:22.000
Dude, you gotta read Michelle Malkin's book, Who Built That?
00:16:25.000
She talks about the history of glass and how fucking insanely hard it is to make.
00:16:37.000
In the studio is sinking like give it a thousand years and that will have like drip will be dripping Yeah, that's why when you see a house that's 200 years old The glass is all warbly because it's sinking.
00:16:53.000
Oh, by the way, in your runner rug, remember I asked you if you just bought that, like, if you went into a store and just bought it?
00:16:59.000
Like, I asked you, is this a custom-made carpet?
00:17:02.000
They don't sell fucking a million variations of carpets.
00:17:06.000
Yeah, that was one of the dumbest things I've ever said.
00:17:08.000
No, they bring, they bring, we could do a whole show on carpeting.
00:17:15.000
And they cut it there, and then they trim the edges.
00:17:17.000
These are like these two huge, tall Jamaican guys.
00:17:22.000
Hey, I'm gonna stitch your carpet, you know, I got Babylon clothes, you know what I mean?
00:17:26.000
And they're just sitting there sewing, speaking Patois, where I can't understand one fucking word.
00:17:32.000
I'd love to do a documentary on Patois, Glaswegian, and Puerto Rican.
00:17:42.000
That they're unintelligible to people who are not part of that community.
00:17:46.000
Like if you're in Jamaica at a construction site, you have no fucking clue what they're saying.
00:17:52.000
And I'm told, I don't speak Spanish, but I'm told from my Mexican friends that Puerto Rican is no consonants.
00:18:03.000
And Spanish people only get, like, a third of what they're saying.
00:18:07.000
Like, in Glasgow, they're like, Hey, what are you doing?
00:18:31.000
It's like you know the language they're speaking, but you can't grasp it.
00:18:44.000
There's some animosity in all of those cultures.
00:18:48.000
It's you saying, I don't want to be part of the bigger group.
00:18:53.000
And Glaswegians hate, they hate, they don't just hate the English.
00:19:05.000
And I would argue that Jamaicans resented the English occupation.
00:19:09.000
They only got, they only got independence in what was it?
00:19:14.000
Um, they developed their own language as a fuck you to the English.
00:19:18.000
And Puerto Ricans, Puerto Ricans in New York, they don't like
00:19:25.000
That's why the Puerto Rican Day Parade is such a big deal.
00:19:27.000
And I don't think they even get along with Puerto Ricans in Puerto Rico.
00:19:30.000
You go to Puerto Rico and they're not impressed by New York-icans.
00:19:33.000
Now, there might be some justification for that, because... Justification!
00:19:48.000
In the 50s, New York decided Puerto Ricans were using up too much welfare, and they gave them a financial incentive to be sterilized.
00:20:02.000
So they gave them like 12 grand to be sterilized because
00:20:07.000
By the way, what you have to know about the 50s is it was right after World War II, and people were just fucking Nazis.
00:20:13.000
Like in New York, you know that movie about the triplets?
00:20:16.000
There was an adoption agency that would separate triplets, give them to different homes to test nature versus nurture.
00:20:23.000
So they'd give one triplet to a poor family, one triplet to a rich family, one triplet to a guy who's never around, and then they would analyze those kids throughout life and not tell them that they're fucking triplets.
00:20:36.000
It's a fascinating movie, but it's triplets, New York, adoption.
00:20:43.000
But yeah, whenever you hear about shit in the 50s, you got to understand it's right after the Holocaust and people are just fucking dark, evil human, like they're eugenicists.
00:21:06.000
And it shows you just how dark people were in the 50s.
00:21:08.000
But yeah, in the 50s, they told Puerto Ricans, it is mathematically advantageous to provide Puerto Ricans with sterilization because they use up more than 12 grand in welfare over the course of their life and they will breed more, so let us provide them.
00:21:27.000
So I'd understand if Puerto Ricans have some animosity towards the city and to any other different culture.
00:21:34.000
But yeah, isn't a, isn't a bizarre accent an indication that you don't like, you don't want to assimilate?
00:21:43.000
If you speak French... That's how French people talk now.
00:22:04.000
It's a bizarre accent that's like 400 years old.
00:22:07.000
And you might find it in the country if you talk to a hundred year old person.
00:22:10.000
But it's very, very, it's sort of like the transatlantic accent where, um, uh, you had people going, hello, how are you sir?
00:22:22.000
It's, it's almost like they've preserved that, but even older, like they call a car a char and it comes from a chariot.
00:22:31.000
And the Quebecois, and I'm not necessarily against this, by the way, the Quebecois resent Canada.
00:22:37.000
They call it ka-ka-Canada, like shit, shit-a-da.
00:22:42.000
And they've preserved their language and their culture.
00:22:45.000
And I think to do that, you need to have a sense of animosity towards the rest.
00:22:50.000
And I believe as a Westerner, I have animosity towards other cultures.
00:23:02.000
And it's weird that that's called racist because this is what I was talking about the other day with my lawyer, just for fun.
00:23:08.000
When you think of the West, you think of basically America and Britain.
00:23:15.000
What has fucking France ever done besides make some great pastries?
00:23:29.000
Has anyone spoken to Macron, the fucking pedophile victim?
00:23:42.000
So when you say the West, you're thinking of those two countries, and of course all the others.
00:23:46.000
I would even include ABC in there, Argentina, Brazil, and Chile.
00:23:53.000
As far as like influence and power and who's part of it, you go American Britain.
00:23:58.000
Conversely, when you think of the East, you're really thinking of Russia and China.
00:24:22.000
Out of the group you hate, 50% of them are white.
00:24:28.000
It's a free market versus non-free market thing.
00:24:35.000
And the East is pro-government and thinks that they can handle everyone's business.
00:24:40.000
And the West says, no, we'll handle our own business.
00:24:49.000
This podcast is not as funny as I hoped it would be.
00:24:58.000
I would argue that the West is closer to God, because God has built all these things in nature to correct us.
00:25:13.000
If you murder someone, you have nightmares every night.
00:25:15.000
So he has all these checks and balances built into our DNA.
00:25:19.000
So to say, I'm going to handle everything, is to literally play God.
00:25:23.000
So Putin, and whoever the fuck's running China these days, is playing God.
00:25:29.000
And that's why you end up with dead bodies everywhere.
00:25:37.000
But here, we allow people to roam free because we know that God's checks and balances will even them out.
00:25:45.000
Someone rapes your sister, you kick the living shit out of them.
00:25:52.000
Although, wait a minute, we do have the government handling it, and that's a terrible analogy, because you'd call the fucking police.
00:25:58.000
I'd call them after I beat the shit out of them.
00:26:00.000
I'd be like, there's a dead guy here, can you get that out of here?
00:26:12.000
Is that the sanitation department or something?
00:26:16.000
And here's the thing, so a cop will make a joke, like he'll pick up a head and he'll go, it really does feel like a bowling ball!
00:26:27.000
Political correctness is chastising cops for jokes like that.
00:26:30.000
And, but that's their pressure release and their suicide rates.
00:26:34.000
I don't have any hard data on this, but just from the cops, I know that they all tell me that suicide is on the rise.
00:26:40.000
And I believe it's because they're being censored.
00:26:47.000
And when you don't give a cop a release, they go fucking crazy.
00:26:51.000
They deal with dead... You know, I know cops who... Some guy killed himself on the subway.
00:27:04.000
Like, you know when someone locks their bike and then they abandon it?
00:27:20.000
Yeah, I don't think people that are pro-censorship, like the progressives, they don't take laughter seriously.
00:27:28.000
That's the other thing about hate has no home here.
00:27:41.000
You know what they do in my fucking neighborhood?
00:27:47.000
And this is a perfect example of what's wrong with lefties in the suburbs.
00:27:51.000
First of all, they moved there because of white flight and they wanted to be away from the ghetto and around nice schools.
00:28:01.000
You know, the less blacks in a neighborhood in America, the more they cherish them.
00:28:06.000
They treat black people in the suburbs, in the rich suburbs, they treat them like pets.
00:28:12.000
Like they're so excited and they cherish them in a really sort of patronizing way.
00:28:21.000
So they have this Earth Day at a park in Westchester and the taxes are so insane up there.
00:28:28.000
Some guys pay a hundred grand property and education.
00:28:36.000
They all have fucking, basically Lamborghinis, the park workers.
00:28:45.000
And there's garbages everywhere and they all have their little fucking vests.
00:28:53.000
Being a cop in a small town in the suburbs of New York is awesome.
00:28:55.000
All you have to do is prosecute people who do illegal U-turns.
00:29:04.000
In fact, one thing that no one mentions about small town cops is if there's a fucking major shootout, you're on your own.
00:29:18.000
No one's coming out to you if you're in a rich suburb.
00:29:20.000
Now, there's not a lot of shootouts, obviously, but if there is, you're fucked.
00:29:25.000
Anyway, so they have this Earth Day, and they go to Home Depot, they buy like four boxes of contractor bags, which is already bad for the environment, right?
00:29:46.000
And everyone comes together and they go to clean up the park.
00:29:49.000
Now, say there's garbage everywhere in the park, which there obviously is not.
00:29:55.000
Even in the hood, you don't have garbage all over the park.
00:30:10.000
And on my canoe, go to the middle of the lake and push it into the lake.
00:30:15.000
And they go, yeah, it'll take forever to break down.
00:30:23.000
That's where we got the steel and plastic from in the first place.
00:30:28.000
Now, if you do a thousand dishwashers and the lake's gone, that's another story.
00:30:31.000
But people think littering is bad for the environment.
00:30:39.000
So they go around picking up garbage at a park and there's like 50 people with contractor bags and rakes.
00:30:58.000
There's no Klansmen galloping up and down the fucking street!
00:31:02.000
And Trump is not racist, and Trump is not anti-semitic, and anti-semitism is not on the rise!
00:31:16.000
And if it was normal, then someone would say, Hi, I'm a white supremacist, and someone else would go, Oh yeah, I've heard of you guys, you're like half the country?
00:31:37.000
Look at how much I've been deplatformed based on the rumor that I might be a racist.
00:31:44.000
Clearly it's listed in the general ethos as equal to pedophilia.
00:31:52.000
Jerry Sandusky and David Duke have the same lifestyle.
00:32:03.000
He actually is still on Twitter for some weird reason, but he can't monetize anything.
00:32:11.000
He has the same politics as Professor Griff or Louis Farrakhan or the Black Liberation Army or a million different very, very esoteric groups.
00:32:20.000
This is what people don't understand about fascism.
00:32:30.000
The racists in Spain hate Germans and French white people.
00:32:39.000
What are those separatists in Spain called again?
00:33:10.000
The two things that suck about being old is you can never remember what the fuck you're talking about.
00:33:15.000
Like you'll be trying to remember Charlton Heston.
00:33:26.000
And then you just sit there going, what the fuck is his name?
00:33:31.000
And then no one tells you this about being old.
00:33:42.000
She goes, go online, buy like 50 pairs of reading glasses, and just scatter them around your house.
00:33:48.000
Because you're always going to be looking for reading glasses.
00:33:58.000
I had a hint of that when you said it the first time.
00:34:07.000
In Ben-Hur, he's on a raft, and I couldn't help but notice he has gorgeous feet.
00:34:13.000
Oh, so this isn't like a thing, this is... No, this is just me.
00:34:17.000
The bones, you know those long bones that go to your toes?
00:34:23.000
You know it's possible that some of these Hollywood types are just better.
00:34:28.000
Like maybe Ronald Reagan was a good president because he's just a superior human being.
00:34:37.000
Sometimes when I'm hanging out with celebrities I think, maybe you're just better.
00:34:40.000
Like, Sean Lennon, he comes from a long line of samurais.
00:34:48.000
And I've hung out with him a couple of times, and sometimes I think, maybe you're just a superior human being.
00:34:52.000
Or like, Jimmy Kimmel, he drives me insane with his fucking politics, obviously.
00:35:08.000
He's got nice hair and nice teeth and shiny eyes.
00:35:16.000
It's like perfect little brown cylinders that just come out.
00:35:19.000
But I don't think it's gay, by the way, because... Oh, you're looking at it now?
00:35:25.000
I think we equate femininity like... Well, then I shouldn't like it.
00:35:33.000
If you could lose the rest of them, then that's not gay at all.
00:35:41.000
Oh, they're probably... I waited a little too long.
00:35:51.000
I should have said, so what's going on with his feet?
00:35:58.000
I would like to put them on my wife or me, if that's possible.
00:36:02.000
Can you ask the hospital for a transplant when you don't really need it?
00:36:06.000
I want a heart transplant, like right now, just because I'm an alcoholic and my heart's a piece of shit.
00:36:22.000
I may have had one butt plug up there once or some girl with a finger like once.
00:36:28.000
I have the anus of an 80-year-old gay man, and when I walk through the West Village, I tip my hat to them because we're peers.
00:36:36.000
I guess it's boozing, but like, I need to do a bidet if I'm going to the bathroom because it'll bleed.
00:36:55.000
That you're just kind of like erasing your entire body from the back?
00:37:02.000
Sometimes I'll be wiping my ass and I'll just go, it's always brown on the toilet paper, and I'll just go, you know what?
00:37:09.000
I'm not gonna sit here all day until my ass bleeds from wiping.
00:37:13.000
I'm just gonna put a man pond in, like a folded tissue, and just walk around with that because this isn't working.
00:37:19.000
You have to cauterize your asshole every time you take a shit.
00:37:22.000
If I'm on vacation, and I'm away from my bidet, I'm fucked.
00:37:27.000
Like, I have to basically give myself an enema.
00:37:36.000
They're 80 bucks, and they connect to your tank, and they blast, literally blast the shit out of your ass.
00:37:42.000
And if you relax perfectly, it goes right up your ass.
00:37:48.000
I have to have a full enema ass blast or my underwear is ruined and I'm a wreck.
00:38:06.000
I, if a 13 year old dies in a car accident, that's obviously horrible.
00:38:21.000
Like there's no, where do you, what is an asshole?
00:38:25.000
It's, it's, uh, you would play the lining and then they would distend, you know, like in the, the prolapse, you'd cut that.
00:38:34.000
Like the muscles that clench your anus, they start in your head.
00:38:38.000
Like there's, there's no way, there's no such thing as an asshole really.
00:38:46.000
I say there's no such thing as a racist, and there's no hate around, but there's also no such thing as an asshole.
00:38:51.000
Yeah, an asshole is like... You cannot do an anal transplant.
00:38:58.000
You know, it's defined by the... Yeah, like, clench your anus right now.
00:39:09.000
I think we're just a huge vessel for our assholes.
00:39:12.000
You know, I love talking to doctors about gross shit, and they're never really into it.
00:39:22.000
My favorite thing to say to doctors is, what if someone cut off their eyelid with scissors?
00:39:40.000
You, you, you can replace skin, like on a hip, say you get a burn, but that skin of an eyelid does shit.
00:39:54.000
So yeah, I guess you got to give up on the eye?
00:39:56.000
And you can't, even if you have a spare eyelid, can you fucking stitch it together good?
00:40:07.000
Can you imagine how hard it is to do an eyelid transplant?
00:40:13.000
You'd have to shrink your body to be one inch tall.
00:40:18.000
And with a giant, you got the giant needle now, and you're stitching, because you gotta stitch the muscle tissue, which you just hope God can fix on his own.
00:40:28.000
Like John Bobbitt, they fucking found his dick in a park by the side of the road, and then some guy stitched it back on.
00:40:48.000
You sew the main veins, and then God's like, I'll handle all the capillaries.
00:41:00.000
I was joking with Anthony Kumi the other day, and I said, I didn't realize that that fucking bitch, Lorena Bobbitt, got 45 days in a mental institution for chopping off a man's cock.
00:41:14.000
And it took me 24 hours to get his joke because she chopped the top of his dick off.
00:41:19.000
She got in a car and then she threw it out the car window.
00:41:22.000
And these awesome cops, God bless their cotton socks, found the dick, put it on ice, went to the hospital.
00:41:29.000
And then I believe it was nine hours of operating and they sewed, I'm going to say the urethra and like five of the top veins.
00:41:40.000
And then the capillaries... I don't fucking know.
00:41:54.000
One time I was with a heart surgeon, and my uncle-in-law does transplants, and he told me how to do them.
00:42:08.000
And then it's only four ventricles, four big pieces of penne pasta.
00:42:13.000
And you hook their femur up, their femoral artery, to a machine, and it does the blood pumping.
00:42:23.000
So the machine is doing the heart pumping, right?
00:42:26.000
You cut out the heart, put in a new one, sew up the four pennes, and you're good.
00:42:30.000
So I met a heart surgeon at some conservative, like, luncheon thing.
00:42:40.000
And he shows me a picture on his phone of a fucking open heart surgery.
00:43:04.000
It kind of goes back to this whole point of reverence.
00:43:14.000
If you see a surgeon on the street, you should drop to your knees and start blowing him, even if you're not gay.
00:43:25.000
It's like, there's these sped up videos of the building of an ocean liner.
00:43:32.000
And the machines that do it, like layer by layer, or a cruise ship or something.
00:43:36.000
The guy, you should blow the guy who made that.
00:43:50.000
Cops, people who build ocean liners, people who build chairlifts.
00:44:02.000
Part of your routine, like, oh, I gotta go get the morning paper.
00:44:06.000
I'll put on my slippers and my knee pads in case a surgeon walks by.
00:44:09.000
Now that sounds insane, but I think the way to balance that out is if you haven't... If you haven't blown a guy that... If you can't find your nearest construction worker who builds ocean liners, you blow somebody who's blown at least five of them.
00:44:21.000
So that way you keep the... You know what I mean?
00:44:26.000
And by the way, that goes for female brain surgeons and female engineers.
00:44:38.000
So when you go up to a female brain surgeon and go, by the way, I appreciate what you do.
00:44:46.000
And he's like, okay, well, I'm here if you need me.
00:44:48.000
Yeah, you should insist once, because I think they're being nice.
00:44:50.000
Yeah, there should be, like, hate has no home here.
00:44:52.000
There should be a little, you know how you have that AIDS ribbon that you put on your lapel?
00:45:04.000
It's like, what you do is you take Elmer's glue and you just put a blob of it on your lapel.
00:45:10.000
And what it means is women and men, but mostly men, let's cut the shit.
00:45:15.000
Who, you know, help create society and save lives.
00:45:19.000
This happened, by the way, I thought this was really uncool.
00:45:22.000
After September 11th in New York, firemen, I'm not a fan of the FDNY, by the way.
00:45:28.000
It's sort of like Army and Navy, like you have to choose sides.
00:45:35.000
The other gets paid to risk their lives every day.
00:45:43.000
There's a murder a day, however, in East New York.
00:45:54.000
There was firemen who were wearing their fucking
00:45:59.000
They're sort of, not just their uniforms, but their like fancy uniforms.
00:46:04.000
Yeah, with the suit and the lapels and the fucking hat.
00:46:07.000
And they were going to bars on Avenue A and getting made out with.
00:46:13.000
Because women would just come up to them and just start French kissing them everywhere they went.
00:46:19.000
And of course, fireman's first thought when that's going on is, let me get some of that.
00:46:28.000
And I'm thinking of a specific bar on a, what was it called?
00:46:32.000
I think it was called a bar across from Manitoba's.
00:46:36.000
Or maybe it's called Avenue A. Um, just walk around getting Frenched.
00:46:40.000
Like 3,000 people died and you're like, can I get some French in under that?
00:46:44.000
By the way, another thing about the FDNY that is rarely talked about, you can look this up.
00:46:49.000
They fucking robbed a Rolex store in world trade.
00:47:05.000
It's about a week from me, but yeah, I do think.
00:47:13.000
I thought about a Rolex today on the way here, and it's the stupidest purchase you could ever buy.
00:47:18.000
$26,000 for a fucking watch, but it's guaranteed for life.
00:47:22.000
You can give it to your son, and it's only a matter of time before I fucking buy one.
00:47:35.000
It's a really cool boat that your family would enjoy.
00:47:43.000
It's a really cool thing to buy for your family.
00:47:47.000
A fucking watch is the stupidest way to spend $26,000, but I just cannot stop thinking about it.
00:47:54.000
My dad said that about a Jaguar car, and I bought him one, and he totaled it.
00:48:06.000
Fuck, last time he was here he was like, sorry?
00:48:09.000
Every single thing I say, hey dad, is that the New York Post?
00:48:23.000
Wait, about in defense of firefighters, at least near me, I don't know about FDNY, because there's not a lot of car wrecks, but like deer, they step out and they fuck you up, or you try to avoid the deer, and there's a lot of car crashes upstate, and ones that end up being fatal, like a lot of people I know from- Yeah, why the fuck is it illegal to kill every deer you want to kill?
00:48:46.000
It's a stupid law that goes back to the 1950s, back when everyone was evil, and their fear was that deer will be the primary source of meat and they'll become extinct.
00:49:01.000
You know how many of my wife's Indian relatives have been to fucking jail?
00:49:08.000
Every single one of her uncles has done jail time for killing deer and they were killing deer to fucking eat them because they were hungry and they were poor.
00:49:14.000
Yeah, you only get four or something like that?
00:49:17.000
I knew a guy upstate who went to jail for like two weeks for shooting a deer from his car.
00:49:26.000
You can't fucking plant an apple tree without covering it.
00:49:30.000
A hundred percent with screens because this fucking deer will eat them.
00:49:35.000
And by the way, a deer will kick the living shit out of you.
00:49:42.000
I read a story about a guy who wanted to domesticate a deer.
00:49:47.000
So he, they would come to his pig's trough and eat his pig feed.
00:49:54.000
He got it around his neck and he tied it to the trough.
00:49:59.000
And the deer went ballistic and started wrecking the whole trough and everything about it.
00:50:09.000
The deer has a noose around its neck now, but it's not suffocating anymore and it's free, right?
00:50:16.000
Um, he's, the deer starts attacking him and he's running back to his house.
00:50:21.000
The deer is, God, it's hooves in his back going like going up on two legs.
00:50:28.000
And biting him, biting him on the back and kicking the shit out of him.
00:50:44.000
They will kick, look there he is kicking him out!
00:50:49.000
It's not like that's a defensive measure then he runs away.
00:50:51.000
It's like they want to keep going with this fight.
00:50:55.000
I was reading about the origin of men's clubs because of Proud Boy stuff and there was like the Elks Lodge and the Moose and the Freemasons and all Knights of Columbus and
00:51:04.000
The moose, they were saying, we chose the moose because it's the most American animal and it's big and strong, but it keeps to itself and it won't hurt anyone.
00:51:18.000
And I'm reading it going, that is fucking horse shit.
00:51:23.000
During mating season, they will eviscerate a man.
00:51:30.000
And a moose will kick the living shit out of another moose.
00:52:15.000
Yes, and in their defense, they go there for like a cat caught in a tree and other emergencies, first response stuff.
00:52:24.000
But look, if someone's choking on a chicken bone, send someone in a Honda Civic who can do CPR.
00:52:56.000
Now, another thing about firemen you gotta understand is about 70% of firemen, you know, around America are volunteer.
00:53:06.000
But eventually, you know, they just become so expensive that the city goes bankrupt and they have to privatize.
00:53:11.000
Anyway, this has been kind of a wandering podcast.
00:53:13.000
I wanted to focus on Hate Has No Home here and what a stupid... it's not even virtue signaling.
00:53:20.000
It doesn't mean I hate hate, because you don't.
00:53:25.000
And more importantly, it means Trump supporters, Republicans, conservatives, even libertarians, basically anyone who doesn't follow 100% of the crazy liberal tropes that change every day, and it's a new gender and a new bathroom.
00:53:52.000
So I go into the carpet store and I go, Hi, I'm, I guess you'd say Republican.
00:54:03.000
So it's sort of like if you're a Mets fan and it says, it's a big Yankees logo, it sort of says Mets fans aren't wanted here.
00:54:17.000
And I go, okay, well you have a DNC sign in your window.
00:54:22.000
And the woman, it's always women, she goes, I just thought it was a nice gesture.
00:54:27.000
And I go, well, it actually means a lot more than just, hate has no home here.
00:54:43.000
You don't want the Klan, you don't want the Ku Klux Klan shopping at your store.
00:55:00.000
And why are you in the suburbs of New York saying, I don't want any Klansmen in my house?
00:55:10.000
It's like saying I don't want any rapists at my house.
00:55:18.000
What you're saying when you put that sign up is that you think hate is big.
00:55:40.000
The entire dinner party will gasp and they'll drop their fucking forks.
00:55:50.000
This is a February of 2018 says KKK chapters are dwindling and according to the definition of hate group other hate groups are on the rise.
00:56:05.000
says anyone who's Catholic or is against gay adoption or gay marriage or is an ex-Muslim who thinks that Islam is going a little far, that's on the hate group.
00:56:16.000
does too is say there's some crazy group like a fucking white nationalist whatever party and they have 15 headquarters.
00:56:26.000
That could be one guy by the way in his basement.
00:56:30.000
Or family, like three families tops or something, you know, just... Yeah, they have every division of that group, like every location.
00:56:39.000
So it's almost like every member really becomes a pin on their fucking hate map.
00:56:43.000
Yeah, it says, uh, from 2016... Yeah, they fell from 130 groups to 72 last year.
00:56:50.000
And then despite... And a group is probably three.
00:56:54.000
Oh yeah, that could be kind of this group, yeah.
00:56:56.000
And it counted a total of 954 active hate groups in 2017.
00:57:09.000
I've said this a million times, but he's at a bar and a black guy sitting next to this alleged Archie Bunker white nationalist racist piece of shit, right?
00:57:20.000
He doesn't understand why anyone would have a sandwich where the bread wasn't toasted.
00:57:34.000
You think the white guy is going to deny himself an interesting conversation at a bar because of race?
00:57:47.000
If there's an accountant who's going to save the money and he's black, they're going to go, come on down, dude.
00:57:56.000
And deny the company someone who's going to help them?
00:58:06.000
And here's an interesting anecdote about fascism and how parochial it is and how Spanish fascists are just going to stick to Spain.
00:58:15.000
There's no risk of Spanish Catalans, fascists, taking over America, Germany, France, becoming a plague.
00:58:27.000
When Churchill decided to engage in World War II and fight Hitler, the head of the English fascist party, they had a fascist party.
00:58:54.000
Which is why Pat Buchanan says we shouldn't have gotten involved in World War II.
00:58:58.000
We should have let Hitler and Stalin duke it out and they both would lose and then we'd have no fascism and no communism.
00:59:06.000
I think it's a very interesting theory and it's well told in the book The Unnecessary War.
00:59:19.000
One side thinks the other side are Nazis and they're going to start World War III.
00:59:23.000
The Nazi side thinks that this side is retarded.
00:59:30.000
I'm quoting Proud Boy Magazine right now, which is a good compendium of myths.
00:59:39.000
I mean, we had this in Vietnam, where you were either a commie who hated the war in Vietnam, and by the way, you were right, or you were a patriot who wanted to wipe out communism, and by the way, you were right.
01:00:03.000
Alan Dershowitz isn't invited to his dinners at Martha's Vineyard, and all they do at those dinners is talk about Alan Dershowitz and how he became such an evil Nazi.
01:00:15.000
I honestly don't because it's so predicated on myths.
01:00:20.000
This idea that hate is this looming force that's about to take over the country.
01:00:41.000
I don't understand why you're Bigfoot chasing with your Nazi glasses when there's a looming threat right there.
01:00:52.000
But if, you know, England and Germany and Europe is any indication, it could get worse.
01:01:02.000
I just, I'm genuinely baffled by this obsession with finding Nazis in your soup.
01:01:15.000
It's definitely going to go past the 2020 election.
01:01:21.000
If Trump wins, it's not going to stop until he's not in office.
01:01:25.000
And if Elizabeth Warren, Pocahontas wins, it still won't stop.
01:01:34.000
And the crazy part is, it's based on a fucking myth.
01:01:39.000
We are living in Salem, and all we talk about is witches.
01:01:46.000
I have no platforms but this and YouTube for now, although I can't monetize it, but I've been declared a witch.
01:02:00.000
Like if you said Gavin McInnes is a sexist because he thinks women would be happier at home, that's cool.
01:02:08.000
Or if you said he's a transphobe because he thinks that there's only two genders and most trans people are just mentally ill gays, that's actually a thing I believe.
01:02:21.000
So they've got to do the anti-Semitic Nazi fucking racist bigot shit.
01:02:27.000
And when you base your philosophy on 50% of the country being racist.
01:02:34.000
And they're not, you've got to create racist out of thin air.
01:02:43.000
And if you have that sign on your lawn, you're a fucking retard.
01:02:47.000
And if you have it in your store, you are stupid and bad at business.
01:02:53.000
I'm going to start doing these a lot more until my platform is denied, which will probably be a matter of weeks.
01:03:00.000
And I've got some big announcements coming up with litigation and litigation and a new show.
01:03:10.000
I was talking to, I've been talking to a lot of rich people about a lot of big projects and I will keep you posted here.
01:03:16.000
Anyway, I like you more than a friend and I'll see you probably Monday, maybe Monday.
01:03:35.000
You have a microphone next to your fucking face.
01:03:38.000
I thought that you ended the show with Get Off My Lawn.