Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - December 30, 2017


Get Off My Lawn Podcast #14 | Tell me something that's true that almost nobody agrees with you on


Episode Stats

Length

1 hour and 23 minutes

Words per Minute

180.03593

Word Count

15,033

Sentence Count

1,270

Misogynist Sentences

109

Hate Speech Sentences

72


Summary

In this episode of the Big Little Lies Podcast, we talk about Peter Thiel and the wage gap, and how to figure out if you re a "red-pilled" person. We also talk about the idea of the "red pill" and why it's a good way to gauge how much of a red-pill you are. And we read from a tweet about the alt-right and how it's better than a Red Pill. Also, we have a new segment called Hodgepodge, where we discuss the concept of a "good food girl" and a "bad food girl." This episode was produced by Alex Blumberg and edited by Annie-Rose Strasser. Our theme song is Come Alone by Suneaters, courtesy of Lotuspool Records. Our ad music is by Haley Shaw. Special thanks to our sponsor, VaynerMedia. Music by Komiku and tyops. Art: Mackenzie Moore Editor: Will Witwer Music: Hayden Coplen Additional mixing and mastering by Ian Dorsch Mixing by Kevin McLeod Editing by Matthew Boll Cover art by Jeff Kaale, Jeff Perla and Matthew Boll, with additional editing by Patrick Muldowney, Jake Tapper, and Bobby Lord, and additional production assistance from Ben Koppel, and Matt Knost, and Alex Blanchard, and Rachel Ward, and Matthew Kuchta, with help from Rachel Goodman, and Ben Kotnik, with assistance from Rachel Ward , with additional assistance from Matthew Bolland, Caitlin Durwooden, and Michael Hyatt, and Jack Williams, and Jake Tappan, and Paul Nealon, and Mike McLennon, is talking about the "Red Pill" podcast, and more. , we also includes an introduction to the "Big Little Things" episode, and a little bit of "The Big Little Thing" by Michael Malice, and an introduction about the concept "The Red Pill." . , and a lot of other stuff, and some other stuff that doesn't have a red pill, and it's not much more, but it's more than just one red pill and a bunch of other things, including "The Good Food Girl" by the Red Pill, and we're not going to get any better than that, so we'll talk about that, too, we'll see you in the next episode.


Transcript

00:00:00.000 What do you know to be true that everyone else thinks is false?
00:00:04.000 This is apparently said by Peter Thiel at job interviews.
00:00:07.000 Peter Thiel's the guy who started PayPal and now is one of the fourth most influential people in the world according to Forbes.
00:00:14.000 He's worth something like 2.6 billion.
00:00:18.000 Runs a bunch of foundations.
00:00:20.000 Isn't he the guy who sued the pants off of Gawker?
00:00:23.000 Helped Hulk Hogan win that case?
00:00:26.000 I don't know.
00:00:27.000 All seems petty to me.
00:00:28.000 Maybe he's gay and he was mad about being outed.
00:00:30.000 I can't remember.
00:00:31.000 Now I sound like I'm crapping on him.
00:00:33.000 But I think it's a brilliant question.
00:00:35.000 And it's sort of like saying, are you at least remotely red-pilled?
00:00:41.000 And it also protects you from guys who are too red-pilled.
00:00:45.000 Now, when I first heard this question, it was from my brother, and I said, oh, I would just say the wage gap.
00:00:50.000 That's a nice easy one, politically correct.
00:00:52.000 And he goes, what are you talking about?
00:00:54.000 Couldn't be less politically correct.
00:00:55.000 You'd be, you'd lose your job instantly.
00:00:58.000 No, they don't want that.
00:00:59.000 Oh, all right.
00:01:01.000 You know, I'm in my home studio and there was a Christmas break.
00:01:06.000 And I'm noticing kids must have been up here because there's weird stuff like a thing of ginger ale, caffeine free, that's what kids drink.
00:01:14.000 Missing clip, my set seems to be misaligned.
00:01:17.000 Goddamn kids!
00:01:19.000 Get off my lawn, stay out of my studio!
00:01:22.000 Sorry.
00:01:24.000 And yeah, he says, no, no, you could never say that.
00:01:26.000 Are you crazy?
00:01:28.000 That seems really uncontroversial to me.
00:01:30.000 I mean, look it up.
00:01:31.000 Women don't earn less than men for the same work.
00:01:34.000 In fact, that's illegal in America.
00:01:37.000 Now, they actually take home less money overall.
00:01:41.000 That's because they choose to work less.
00:01:43.000 They choose they're less ambitious.
00:01:44.000 They want to be with the kids more.
00:01:46.000 When they're young and single, they make more than men.
00:01:50.000 Probably because they're in fashion.
00:01:56.000 So, you know, he said, no, you can't say that.
00:01:58.000 And so we sort of been talking about this question all week over the whole holidays to my whole family.
00:02:04.000 And it's a good gauge of how red-pilled you are.
00:02:06.000 And I think you can be too red-pilled.
00:02:08.000 Like this dude.
00:02:09.000 Have you seen Paul Nealon?
00:02:11.000 Go off on Twitter?
00:02:13.000 I discovered him a couple weeks ago.
00:02:14.000 He wants to unseat Paul Ryan.
00:02:16.000 And he seemed like an interesting guy.
00:02:19.000 Unlike Paul Ryan, I pledged to uphold my oath of office, make no laws that don't apply to Congress or admin officials, build a wall to deport illegals, vote for national reciprocity, vote the Muslim Brotherhood a terror organization, vote for the heartbeat bill, whatever that is.
00:02:31.000 Seemed pretty good.
00:02:33.000 And he would call out liberals in a really
00:02:38.000 We're good to go.
00:02:57.000 And then he brings up Kevin MacDonald's book, Culture of Critique, which is sort of like the Elders of Zion Bible.
00:03:04.000 It's considered the go-to book for any discussion of anti-Semitism.
00:03:08.000 I mean, I think a lot of Jewish people read it to sort of get the argument of what the Nazis are saying.
00:03:14.000 Modern Nazis, I mean.
00:03:17.000 It's probably the most anti-Semitic modern book there is.
00:03:21.000 And I think it even blames... Oh yeah, Jake Tapper tweeted Paul Nealon and said,
00:03:33.000 So we went off the deep end and Michael Malice actually is writing a book about the alt-right that I'm in and he separates the alt-light and the alt-right and he says, and I'm paraphrasing here, but he says the problem with those guys on the far far right is they didn't have one red pill, they took the whole bottle.
00:03:51.000 Now, those of us who don't want to OD, take one red pill,
00:03:58.000 And, uh, I think that Peter Thiel question is a fun way to gauge where you're at.
00:04:02.000 Now, apparently I'm too far with the wage gap.
00:04:05.000 And, uh, my brother had an interesting one, and he said, mentors are bullshit.
00:04:09.000 So over the course of this podcast, I'm gonna talk about some epiphanies I had, um, over the holidays.
00:04:16.000 This is gonna be sort of a hodgepodge podcast.
00:04:19.000 But, um, the big- I'm gonna- I better cut- write this down before I run out of batteries.
00:04:24.000 But the biggies are,
00:04:27.000 Mentors are bad for you.
00:04:30.000 Mentors are bad for you.
00:04:33.000 We are living in very racist times.
00:04:37.000 Education is bullshit.
00:04:40.000 Domestic abuse.
00:04:41.000 I'm going to be careful when I talk about that.
00:04:43.000 But there's something not right about this whole concept of the woman with the big sunglasses saying her husband beat her.
00:04:51.000 Good food and bad food is a myth.
00:04:54.000 And teamwork is a myth.
00:04:57.000 So, the first one is my brother's answer to the Peter Thiel thing.
00:05:00.000 This isn't my fictional brother, by the way.
00:05:02.000 It's my actual brother.
00:05:04.000 He's a 34-year-old Canadian.
00:05:05.000 He works in tech, app development, that kind of stuff.
00:05:09.000 Smart guy.
00:05:10.000 Mild-mannered guy.
00:05:11.000 Very quiet.
00:05:13.000 Funny.
00:05:14.000 Very mellow.
00:05:16.000 He's kind of like how you'd think you'll be when you're 57.
00:05:19.000 He acts like a 57-year-old.
00:05:21.000 But he parties.
00:05:22.000 Anyway.
00:05:24.000 Now, we're not talking about big brother mentors, but I wouldn't be surprised if the data on those showed that they're not really beneficial.
00:05:33.000 You know, you need a father figure 24 hours a day.
00:05:37.000 And I had a fight with this woman on my old show, The Gavin McInnes Show, and she called her book, The Pie Life, a little play on the life of pie.
00:05:45.000 And she was basically saying, you know, you have a slice.
00:05:48.000 You have a slice of motherhood, a slice of working.
00:05:50.000 You can have it all.
00:05:51.000 You can have your pie and eat it too.
00:05:54.000 And we argued for two hours, and we came down to a fundamental point of disagreement that we couldn't get past.
00:06:02.000 And her contention is that, you know, maybe you don't see your kid all week, Monday to Thursday, but you have a really solid Saturday where you take her to dance, and you dance with her, and it's just so thorough.
00:06:17.000 And that one day of quality is just as valuable as all those other days.
00:06:23.000 And I said, no, no, no.
00:06:26.000 Being a crappy parent who's always there.
00:06:28.000 And when I say crappy, I mean, you don't build her a dollhouse.
00:06:31.000 I don't mean you beat her.
00:06:33.000 But just being an okay parent that's around is way better.
00:06:37.000 You know why?
00:06:38.000 Because when you're a parent, you're sort of like a security guard.
00:06:43.000 And you're there in case there's a problem.
00:06:46.000 It's like being a fireman.
00:06:47.000 You can't say, I worked at the firehouse one day a year, but that day I cleaned the fire engines, I do such an incredible job.
00:06:55.000 Yeah, that's great and everything, but I need you there in case there's a fire.
00:06:59.000 I need you there Monday at 4 p.m.
00:07:01.000 when she starts bawling her eyes out because some guy dumped her or something.
00:07:06.000 Or when they have some weird question.
00:07:08.000 Even the other day, my daughter was saying, what's the Illuminati?
00:07:12.000 I know, I let her on the internet too much.
00:07:14.000 Can Beyonce have someone killed?
00:07:18.000 Now, you're not going to get that question on Saturday at dance, but you get these questions.
00:07:22.000 And you know, I told her Beyonce is not going to get anyone killed.
00:07:25.000 Hillary Clinton is, obviously.
00:07:27.000 God.
00:07:31.000 And, uh, sorry, I'm drinking a beer here that is so cold that I feel sorry for it.
00:07:35.000 Like, I'm worried about it.
00:07:36.000 I left my Budweiser's on my front, sort of, uh, sunroom area, because I'm such a drunk that they just fill up the whole fridge.
00:07:45.000 When they came in with this cold snap we've had, and I was touching the can, and the can is acting strangely.
00:07:51.000 Like, when you make a dent in it, it takes a long time for the dent to pop back out, because it's traumatized from the cold.
00:07:57.000 So I put a little paper towel around it, like an emergency blanket.
00:08:00.000 I swear to God, I did feel some empathy.
00:08:05.000 One time I was at SNL watching it live, and they have these billboards during the commercials, and a billboard for Bud Light appeared, and I felt a tingle in my swimsuit area.
00:08:15.000 Like a sexual feeling.
00:08:19.000 Anyway.
00:08:20.000 So, uh... It's about being there.
00:08:24.000 It's about... You're there for the emergencies.
00:08:27.000 You're there for the questions.
00:08:29.000 You know, you don't necessarily need to interrogate kids all the time.
00:08:31.000 How was school?
00:08:32.000 What's going on?
00:08:33.000 But when they have something important, you gotta be there.
00:08:36.000 And that could be stubbing their toe, by the way.
00:08:40.000 So anyway, I'm guessing that the big brother thing, where some guy from the neighborhood shows up and plays catch with you once a week, I'm guessing that doesn't even help.
00:08:51.000 It could make things worse.
00:08:53.000 It could make the kid go, man, it really sucks not having a dad.
00:08:56.000 That was fun.
00:08:57.000 Now I'm more depressed.
00:09:00.000 And then that guy goes, yeah, I'm bored of this.
00:09:01.000 And he moves or something.
00:09:03.000 I don't want to do this anymore.
00:09:03.000 Sorry, dude.
00:09:05.000 That must be crushing.
00:09:06.000 So you just keep losing these dads.
00:09:07.000 But when my brother brought up the mentors, he wasn't talking about that.
00:09:10.000 He was talking about a different program where it's not exactly Big Brother.
00:09:14.000 It's Big Deal Mentors come in.
00:09:17.000 And it'll be like Peter Thiel, for example, will work with some troubled youth.
00:09:23.000 And these kids end up worse off.
00:09:29.000 They end up worse off because role models are BS.
00:09:33.000 The whole concept, and by the way, this Pi Life woman, she, uh, I'll look her up.
00:09:38.000 I mean, you're never going to read this book.
00:09:39.000 It's all about how feminism rocks.
00:09:41.000 And if you're listening to this podcast, you're the last person would do that.
00:09:46.000 Pi Life book.
00:09:48.000 Um, uh, here she is.
00:09:53.000 Her name is, she's pretty hot too.
00:09:58.000 Samantha Etis.
00:10:02.000 So, this is big.
00:10:04.000 This is huge.
00:10:05.000 And this goes to a lot of different things, like role models, or as Samantha Etis puts it, you gotta see it to be it!
00:10:12.000 Women need to see.
00:10:14.000 They need to see women kicking ass on TV.
00:10:16.000 They need to see women in action movies to know they can kick ass too.
00:10:19.000 We need to have a deaf, blind, female race car driver so deaf, blind Helen Kellers can know they can be Kitty O'Neil's.
00:10:28.000 We need to have these role models.
00:10:30.000 You know, Ben Carson had no idea he could be a brain surgeon until he watched a soap opera and saw a black brain surgeon.
00:10:39.000 Bullshit.
00:10:41.000 Bullshit.
00:10:43.000 Like, has there ever been any scientific testing on this whole concept of role models?
00:10:48.000 You don't need a role model, you need a dad.
00:10:50.000 You don't need a big brother, you need a dad.
00:10:53.000 And you don't need a mentor, you need a dad.
00:10:55.000 Now, these guys would be incredibly successful.
00:10:59.000 Someone with Peter Thiel's talent, or someone with, like, Bill Gates' whatever talent, Warren Buffett, those guys are freaks.
00:10:59.000 Freaks.
00:11:07.000 They're like albinos with a third nipple.
00:11:11.000 You're not gonna be that guy.
00:11:13.000 They don't have secrets.
00:11:14.000 I remember I went to this conference Red Bull made me go to because I was in advertising and we were trying to seduce them as clients, get them as clients, and people don't understand how many dead ends there are as an entrepreneur, how many clients.
00:11:26.000 I wooed Red Bull for a year and a half, drank myself silly entertaining them, and no, we're not doing it.
00:11:34.000 Sorry, we're not interested in comedy.
00:11:36.000 Okay.
00:11:38.000 Bye, year of my life.
00:11:40.000 But part of the courtship was going to this thing, Hacking Creativity, done by this South African photographer who was on 60 Minutes once.
00:11:49.000 I'm not going to look him up.
00:11:50.000 He did a bunch of boring black and white pictures of Ray Charles.
00:11:54.000 And they were just spending Red Bull's money to the tune of millions, getting these scientists to do studies.
00:12:01.000 They never said,
00:12:03.000 Is this even a thing that's possible?
00:12:04.000 It was all about, there hasn't been enough research into hacking creativity.
00:12:07.000 We have to figure out how to be creative.
00:12:09.000 No, you're born creative, you're born funny.
00:12:12.000 All you can do as a society and as a parent is say, hey kid,
00:12:17.000 Like me this weekend, this past few days with my kids.
00:12:21.000 Hey, Duncan, here's a snowboard, here's some skis.
00:12:24.000 What do you think is going to be your proclivity?
00:12:27.000 Gave the girl lessons with the skis.
00:12:29.000 She doesn't seem into it.
00:12:30.000 Gave the youngest one the skis.
00:12:32.000 He couldn't believe how much he loves it.
00:12:34.000 He's cried when it was time to go.
00:12:35.000 He almost got frostbite.
00:12:36.000 He loves it so much.
00:12:37.000 He's a skier for life, that kid.
00:12:39.000 The daughter will try again with some lessons, but I'm not going to force it on her.
00:12:44.000 And that's the way it works.
00:12:46.000 She doesn't have to see a skier named Sophie and go, I can do it too because I saw it on my TV.
00:12:52.000 And my TV is the only thing that provides imagination for me.
00:12:57.000 B.S.
00:12:58.000 Go talk to people.
00:13:00.000 Bill Gates, why did you start, why did you rip off everyone and make all computers have the same crappy operating system?
00:13:07.000 I saw a guy on TV who did it and I thought, I want to be like that guy.
00:13:11.000 I wouldn't be surprised if half the time you look this up, when they say that, they sort of go, well, I don't know.
00:13:16.000 Retroactively, I figured out some people who inspired me, but I realized they were just people who shared my genetic traits, and they happened to be... Like, I bet Ben Carson does have some brain surgeons.
00:13:26.000 I bet they're not black, and I bet he sort of was inspired by them because they were good teachers when he was in medical school or something.
00:13:32.000 It's not like they get him out of bed in the morning.
00:13:35.000 But more importantly, with these super mentors, these kids, they think, oh, OK, I can be P. Diddy and make $130 million a year.
00:13:44.000 And then it doesn't happen.
00:13:46.000 And then they're pissed off.
00:13:47.000 They're mad at the world.
00:13:49.000 And now there's some resentment there.
00:13:50.000 And there's a lack of culpability, right?
00:13:53.000 There's a lack of understanding that you're not making that money because you're not special.
00:13:57.000 Sorry, that guy's a freak.
00:14:00.000 And so they get pissed off, and we see this with blacks with affirmative action when they're put into Ivy League schools that they're not qualified to be in.
00:14:07.000 What are you saying, blacks can't go to Harvard?
00:14:09.000 No, dude.
00:14:10.000 I'm saying when their scores have been bumped up, and if you were blind and didn't see the name, you wouldn't have let him in.
00:14:19.000 If his race is getting him in, that's what I meant by affirmative action.
00:14:23.000 What happens with these kids is they tend to drop out.
00:14:26.000 And they don't drop out and go to a community college, where they would have been more suited.
00:14:29.000 They just drop out of college entirely.
00:14:32.000 And I think this is happening with the entire educational system.
00:14:36.000 Everyone's thinking they have to be educated, and so they go to these colleges, and they say, uh, what should I take?
00:14:43.000 Well, you're an idiot, so why don't you take Mass Comm?
00:14:46.000 And, uh, the history of philosophy and science in, uh, German film.
00:14:53.000 So they go, okay, as long as I get a B. And then they come out there, they have less, they're dumber than when they went in, they have less skills.
00:14:59.000 So it's all about playing God and being communist and forcing, you know, this big plan of equality and other people and thinking, oh, I'm Warren Buffett, I'm not special.
00:15:09.000 Yeah, but Kevin, how does this guy know he could be a Warren Buffett unless he talks to Warren Buffett?
00:15:16.000 I don't know, you'll figure it out.
00:15:17.000 If you have a family, if you have a mom and a dad, you have an okay school,
00:15:22.000 You'll figure it out.
00:15:22.000 And apparently there was a woman who did this research on mentors and she had discovered that yes, mentors do leave children worse off.
00:15:33.000 They leave the mentees worse off.
00:15:36.000 And I think she died before she could complete her research, but there's just so much money in these stupid foundations.
00:15:43.000 I remember at Rooster, my ad agency, we almost got some guilty white billionaire who wanted to spend a bunch of money mentoring youth.
00:15:50.000 And start a foundation to mentor them.
00:15:52.000 No.
00:15:54.000 So, number one of the thing that you know to be true that everyone else thinks is a fact, mentors don't work.
00:16:03.000 In fact, the whole concept is bad for you.
00:16:06.000 Now, I would include in that teamwork.
00:16:10.000 I think teamwork is malarkey.
00:16:12.000 You know, I saw this video for this app where these women can learn to be more assertive at meetings.
00:16:20.000 Excuse me.
00:16:21.000 Got a bit of a cold from skiing in zero degrees.
00:16:25.000 Where it wasn't cold, it was physically painful.
00:16:28.000 Like the snow machine hits your face and it feels like buckshot.
00:16:33.000 And she had this app to make sure that she was more vocal during meetings and it had all this software to sort of tell if you were assertive or confident or blah blah blah.
00:16:43.000 And I felt like jumping into my computer and going, lady, if you like meetings, you don't get business.
00:16:48.000 Businessmen, entrepreneurs, real people who belong in the workforce, they hate meetings because they're a waste of time.
00:16:56.000 And you're constantly sitting in a meeting, not going, how can I make sure I say something relevant?
00:17:00.000 Or how can I be more aggressive?
00:17:02.000 You're thinking, I'm going to stand up and say, why couldn't this just have been emailed to everyone?
00:17:07.000 Why do we have to get together?
00:17:09.000 Individualism is what gets the work done.
00:17:13.000 Individuals going off at a tangent is what it's all about.
00:17:20.000 And this whole idea that everyone has to pitch in.
00:17:23.000 That, so that's, I did a TED talk about this too actually.
00:17:27.000 My joke didn't go down very well.
00:17:28.000 It was maybe too subtle.
00:17:31.000 I did a joke at a Sharia talk where I started it out.
00:17:34.000 It was a march against Sharia and I did a big talk about how we need Sharia because women can't drive and you see them naked on the street.
00:17:40.000 Not naked but scantily clad and you get too horny in New York.
00:17:43.000 They should be wearing garbage bags.
00:17:48.000 And I also said, wouldn't it be awesome if you got to force your wife to have sex with you whenever you want?
00:17:53.000 Wouldn't that be great?
00:17:54.000 So I love Sheree, and no one was laughing.
00:17:57.000 So I had to say, just kidding.
00:17:58.000 And basically at these big rallies, you have to talk like Hitler, I'm afraid.
00:18:01.000 You have to talk in threes, like... So I changed it to just like, we're here because we love America!
00:18:11.000 Freest place on earth, and if you don't like it, get lost!
00:18:14.000 Like, there's no room for nuance at a rally.
00:18:19.000 And at the TED Talk, I came out pretending that I thought it was about Ted the Bear, the movie, with Mark Wahlberg, Narkey Mark.
00:18:31.000 And then I had someone come out and whisper in my ear, no, it's about teamwork.
00:18:34.000 It's just at a TED Talk.
00:18:36.000 And no one got it.
00:18:38.000 But my talk, I just listed scientist after scientist who had a crazy idea like, hmm, maybe stomach ulcers are a form of bacteria that can just survive in stomach acid.
00:18:52.000 And you just take antibiotics and you don't have to go in there stitching up holes.
00:18:57.000 And it turns out that guy was right.
00:18:58.000 He cured stomach ulcers forever.
00:19:00.000 Thanks, crazy weirdo not using teamwork.
00:19:05.000 But are you seeing a common pattern here?
00:19:07.000 There's all this, like, we're all born the same.
00:19:09.000 No, we're all born with the same rights.
00:19:11.000 There's such a thing as a person with Down syndrome.
00:19:14.000 There's such a thing as a smart person and a dumb person.
00:19:16.000 There's such a thing as genetics.
00:19:19.000 So we're all born with the same rights, all same opportunities, but we're not all the same people.
00:19:25.000 And that's a communist left-wing myth, and it leads to things like mentors, it leads to things like teamwork.
00:19:31.000 And, number three, I think it ruined education.
00:19:35.000 Now, I talked a second ago about how it ruined post-secondary education in colleges, and that's all a stupid myth now.
00:19:43.000 If my wife wants our kids to go to liberal arts, I will fist fight her in a ring.
00:19:48.000 I will get on MMA gloves and I'll fight to the death.
00:19:52.000 That actually alludes to another one I want to talk about later.
00:19:56.000 No.
00:19:57.000 I don't like fighting with my wife.
00:19:58.000 I usually just say my piece.
00:20:01.000 November was very rocky for us, and she was voting Hillary, and she didn't understand why she had to vote Trump, and we had to vote together.
00:20:09.000 And I said, if a family's moving together, it's a decision that they all sit around the living room and work out together.
00:20:18.000 And they say, yep, I got a better job in Arizona.
00:20:20.000 We can adapt.
00:20:21.000 It's super hot there, but whatever.
00:20:23.000 Good gun laws.
00:20:23.000 Let's go.
00:20:25.000 I said, this is the same.
00:20:26.000 It's what our household vote will be.
00:20:28.000 And she thought it was more like Sharia where I say, you vote for me, woman.
00:20:32.000 What I'm saying is allow me to do like an hour presentation.
00:20:32.000 I said, no, no, no.
00:20:36.000 You know, where I show you like Dinesh D'Souza's movie about Hillary's America or something and let you know who you're voting for.
00:20:42.000 She's like, I'm not going to let you sit there and brainwash me.
00:20:45.000 So eventually I let it go.
00:20:47.000 But the college fight, I will- that's not one I'm gonna let go.
00:20:51.000 There's no way my kids are gonna- they can take STEM if they have a predisposition for something, if they're really determined.
00:20:57.000 But I'm not gonna do this thing that I did, my brother did, everyone I know did, where they just sort of go to a college and then look at a thing, go, I don't know, maybe that?
00:21:05.000 Let's do speech pathology.
00:21:07.000 No way!
00:21:08.000 You'd be way better off as an intern.
00:21:10.000 Way better off doing hard labor.
00:21:12.000 You know?
00:21:15.000 I know one of the most successful people in biotech is a relative of mine, and his brother's a heart surgeon, and they both worked at a tool and dye shop.
00:21:22.000 And you know what the tool and dye shop taught them?
00:21:24.000 This sucks.
00:21:27.000 I am going to study my balls off.
00:21:30.000 I never want to come back here.
00:21:32.000 I don't want to take over the family business.
00:21:34.000 This blows.
00:21:35.000 That's a role model for you, by the way.
00:21:38.000 You know, I remember when I started Vice, co-founded it, and just to be clear here, Soroush Alvi started it, he hired me, I hired Shane.
00:21:49.000 I'd be sitting there working all night in our rundown Montreal loft, and I'd think, at least I don't got any bugs biting me, and at least I'm not sleeping in a tent in the snow.
00:21:58.000 This is climate-controlled, this room, I'll stay up all night, no problem.
00:22:03.000 Very important to
00:22:06.000 Very important to suffer attrition.
00:22:11.000 No, that's not the word, attrition.
00:22:12.000 What's the word?
00:22:13.000 Attrition, acrimony, adversity, a word like that.
00:22:18.000 Austerity, there it is.
00:22:19.000 Thanks, old brain.
00:22:21.000 Austerity is what breeds success, not pampering.
00:22:25.000 And I see these kids, these millennials with their phones and saying like so often that it gives me golf ball eyes.
00:22:34.000 I stare at them like a cartoon.
00:22:36.000 I sometimes can't resist and I go over and I go, do you have any clue
00:22:40.000 How many times you just said, like, in a sentence?
00:22:42.000 Are you even remotely aware?
00:22:44.000 It was a lot.
00:22:47.000 One kid, one 17-year-old, asked me to step outside.
00:22:50.000 I said, I appreciate it, because I was just calling him a girl.
00:22:53.000 I said, you sound like a babysitter.
00:22:55.000 He goes, you want to go outside, old man?
00:22:57.000 And I said, I appreciate your gumption.
00:22:58.000 Now that's more like it, young man.
00:22:59.000 Imagine, that's a lose-lose, fighting a teen in your own neighborhood.
00:23:07.000 You knock him out.
00:23:08.000 Yeah, you know Johnny's dad?
00:23:11.000 He knocked out some kid in town.
00:23:12.000 Or you get beat up by a child.
00:23:14.000 That's pretty much as bad.
00:23:16.000 It's sort of like lesbians.
00:23:19.000 Like I remember this lesbian was mad at me and she had this look in her eyes.
00:23:21.000 This was a long time ago.
00:23:22.000 We were at a party.
00:23:23.000 We were friends.
00:23:24.000 Alright, Amy Kellner is her name.
00:23:26.000 And she was mad I had said something to Ryan McGinley, and she had this look, like her eyes were, again, golf ball eyes, and she was sort of going pink, and I got petrified, because I thought, what the hell do I do now?
00:23:39.000 What if she starts punching me?
00:23:40.000 I mean, I could probably wrestle her to the ground, but if I get on her and punch her in the face, that's terrible!
00:23:47.000 And then, if she beat me up, I'd have to move!
00:23:51.000 I mean, that's the end of your life, right?
00:23:53.000 You'd have to get Scott Peterson on it and dye your goatee blonde and go to Mexico.
00:23:59.000 And I realized, actually, recently, I am scared.
00:24:04.000 You know how they say Islamophobic, homophobic and stuff?
00:24:07.000 I am scared.
00:24:08.000 And it's a tactic the left use all the time.
00:24:10.000 They go, you know what?
00:24:10.000 They're scared of progress.
00:24:12.000 They're scared of us.
00:24:13.000 They're scared of empowered women.
00:24:15.000 And I used to go, God, if you knew how unscared of you I am.
00:24:18.000 But then I realized recently,
00:24:20.000 Actually, I am scared of you.
00:24:22.000 I'm literally scared in the most basic sense of the word.
00:24:25.000 I was taking my boy to this thing.
00:24:27.000 It's a little art room.
00:24:30.000 It's very popular in the burbs now.
00:24:32.000 And what you do is you go there, you buy a canvas, they give you all the paints, you make a painting and then you just pay them like 20 bucks.
00:24:38.000 Or they give you pottery, you paint it, make a little thing, make your name on it, and then they put it in a kiln and you get it back like a week later and you've made something and you pay them a fee.
00:24:47.000 It's like a DIY art store.
00:24:50.000 So I go there, and my boy's painting a painting of Prince for his mom, because my mom whoops.
00:24:55.000 My wife is obsessed with Prince.
00:24:57.000 And he's doing the purple rain and everything.
00:24:59.000 And I see a woman with a pussy hat there.
00:25:02.000 And I am, for the record, reaching levels of fame
00:25:06.000 That are the hugest pain in the ass ever.
00:25:09.000 I'm reaching Sunglasses Baseball Hat level.
00:25:12.000 I'm not saying this to brag, I don't think it's cool to be famous.
00:25:15.000 And I'm not famous for doing Gangs of New York, I'm famous for YouTube videos.
00:25:19.000 So it's not a cool fame.
00:25:21.000 Not that any kind of fame is remotely good.
00:25:24.000 Like Justin Theroux and Jennifer Aniston, they can't go skiing.
00:25:27.000 They'd have to rent the whole hill.
00:25:29.000 Justin Theroux can't just go to a bar and have a beer.
00:25:33.000 He's a prisoner.
00:25:34.000 Will Smith can't go to a baseball game.
00:25:36.000 Or Will Ferrell.
00:25:37.000 They all get... David Cross gets stopped twice a block.
00:25:43.000 Everywhere he goes.
00:25:43.000 Hey man, love your work.
00:25:44.000 I don't care.
00:25:45.000 The free market told me you love my work.
00:25:47.000 Fuck off.
00:25:49.000 I don't say that.
00:25:50.000 I sit and pose for a selfie as they try to work their phone.
00:25:53.000 Wait a minute, wait a minute.
00:25:53.000 Sorry, here.
00:25:54.000 What's... Oh, sorry.
00:25:55.000 I'm sorry.
00:25:55.000 This... Wait a minute.
00:25:57.000 Oh, it's set to video.
00:25:57.000 No, no.
00:25:58.000 Photo.
00:25:59.000 You're, like, sitting there with that stupid grin, just waiting for the phone to work.
00:26:04.000 Anyway, I've reached those levels of fame, and it's a super pain in the ass.
00:26:10.000 It's not... I shouldn't say it's a super pain in the ass.
00:26:12.000 It's just annoying.
00:26:13.000 It's annoying.
00:26:14.000 It's like... I've said this on the other podcasts.
00:26:16.000 It's like if you sharpen your nose black.
00:26:19.000 And you walked into a room and people go, what the?
00:26:22.000 They'd start staring at you and then you'd see them murmur to each other.
00:26:25.000 Why does that guy have a sharpie to black nose?
00:26:27.000 It's like that.
00:26:29.000 So I know I'm gonna get recognized at this thing.
00:26:32.000 And I see a woman in a pussy hat, right?
00:26:34.000 And she's got purple hair.
00:26:35.000 And that's when I get scared.
00:26:37.000 Because I think, she's gonna get up and cause a scene.
00:26:41.000 Call me a Nazi or something.
00:26:43.000 Maybe knock over that entire shelf of ceramics.
00:26:47.000 The entire country has gone crazy ex-girlfriend.
00:26:51.000 They're stalking Donald Trump, filming him through the cameras at the golf course.
00:26:56.000 They are, have you ever seen Husbands and Wives?
00:26:58.000 I used to say they were the Judy, what's-her-name character?
00:27:01.000 No, they're the young mistress, blonde chick, who gets kicked out of the party for talking about astrology, and she says, Jack grabs her, Sidney Pollack grabs her, and he goes, get in the car, you infant!
00:27:13.000 And she's screaming at the top of her lungs.
00:27:16.000 That's what half the country's become, so they're like drunk chicks.
00:27:21.000 Actually, I'm ramping it up.
00:27:23.000 Alright, so we started with Fake News, then I called it Mentally Ill News, now I called it Crazy Ex-Girlfriend News.
00:27:28.000 I am officially ramping it up, you're hearing it live here today, to Drunk Crazy Ex-Girlfriend News.
00:27:36.000 And I'm scared of drunk chicks, because they are firecrackers.
00:27:41.000 You don't know if they're gonna stand up on the bar and start kicking glasses around the place.
00:27:46.000 They are just, they are like, they're a ticking time bomb.
00:27:50.000 You just say, no, I didn't say that, and I didn't tell you not to have another wine.
00:27:54.000 I just think you might like it better if we were to maybe head home soon.
00:27:58.000 Oh, so I'm drunk, so I'm a bitch.
00:28:00.000 No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:28:02.000 Not saying that at all.
00:28:03.000 I think you're a wonderful person.
00:28:04.000 Oh, so my sister's hotter than me?
00:28:07.000 I'm a big fat stupid bitch and you wish you fucked my sister?
00:28:11.000 Okay, okay.
00:28:12.000 Let's get on a rough track here.
00:28:15.000 Let's try to get to a good child.
00:28:16.000 You're beautiful.
00:28:17.000 Now fuck off.
00:28:19.000 That's the best case scenario, by the way.
00:28:22.000 Worst case scenario, she breaks every glass in the joint.
00:28:24.000 Like that, what's her name, the Countess on Real Housewives of New York.
00:28:29.000 She gets back to her hotel, she got dumped.
00:28:32.000 I'm telling you, man, Andy Cohen is Satan.
00:28:35.000 He ruins lives.
00:28:36.000 All those reality shows, they all get divorced, they all end up in jail.
00:28:40.000 It's just little producers, gay producers, getting on these women's shoulders like Rasputin, feeding them wine and going, She called you a bitch.
00:28:48.000 Why don't you go over there and tell her you're not a bitch?
00:28:49.000 Why don't you tell her that you deserve some self-respect?
00:28:52.000 Get in there!
00:28:52.000 Get in there!
00:28:53.000 And they're like, You called me a what?!
00:28:56.000 And it's just a whole season of drunk chicks.
00:28:58.000 And then they get divorced and now they're crazy drunk ex-girlfriends, ex-wives, maniacs.
00:29:03.000 So anyway,
00:29:05.000 The Countess is one of these, and she goes home with some 20-year-old, which is just sad, isn't it?
00:29:10.000 Even, by the way, when I see guys my age going home with a 20-year-old, I go, alrighty, congratulations.
00:29:17.000 I mean, you didn't screw enough 20-year-olds when you were a 20-year-old?
00:29:21.000 Move on, grow up!
00:29:22.000 But anyway...
00:29:23.000 It's sadder when it's a woman, and she's taking some young pool boy back to her hotel room, and she's so drunk that I think she has the wrong hotel room, but the door's open.
00:29:33.000 Yeah, that's it, because the maid is there.
00:29:34.000 And she's like, all right, you can stop cleaning.
00:29:37.000 You can stop cleaning, senorita.
00:29:39.000 We're going to get some lavon.
00:29:43.000 And she's like, actually, this isn't your room.
00:29:45.000 You have to go.
00:29:46.000 And she goes, I'm not going anywhere.
00:29:47.000 I assume there was a lot of swearing.
00:29:49.000 And they get the manager.
00:29:51.000 And then they get the cops.
00:29:52.000 And I think they got someone from the fire department to come by.
00:29:55.000 So she starts beating them all up, probably because she saw Atomic Blonde.
00:29:58.000 Probably because you need to see it to be it.
00:29:59.000 And women need to be in action movies.
00:30:01.000 And they need to know that they can beat up firemen and cops anytime they want with a good roundhouse kick.
00:30:06.000 So she starts flailing on them.
00:30:09.000 As is every man's worst nightmare.
00:30:12.000 And, uh, she gets arrested.
00:30:16.000 Crazy ex-girlfriends.
00:30:18.000 That's what the media has become.
00:30:21.000 Anyway...
00:30:24.000 Forget college education when I say education is bullshit.
00:30:27.000 That's a given.
00:30:29.000 I have a new, much more revolutionary theory.
00:30:31.000 Now, the theme of this show is things you know to be a fact that no one else knows is true.
00:30:36.000 Calling this a fact's a little rich.
00:30:39.000 It's a theory that's on my chalkboard.
00:30:42.000 My Glenn Beck chalkboard.
00:30:43.000 This is in my lab.
00:30:44.000 This is going on in a petri dish in my lab.
00:30:47.000 I think it's possible bacteria might be able to survive stomach acid.
00:30:51.000 I'm not sure.
00:30:51.000 I'm gonna come back in a couple weeks and see if the bacteria is still alive.
00:30:55.000 You ready for this?
00:30:57.000 All school is bullshit.
00:31:00.000 It's just a giant daycare to get them out of our hair.
00:31:03.000 They don't learn anything.
00:31:05.000 They could just do stupid random exercises.
00:31:07.000 Remember the movie Brazil?
00:31:09.000 Kind of an arthouse film where they have this one floor that jumbles numbers and they send them down to the floor below them and then those people decipher the numbers, put them back in order, and then the numbers go up to the floor above and just round and around and around, digging holes, filling them in, digging holes, filling them in.
00:31:26.000 That's school.
00:31:27.000 When was the last time your nine-year-old went up to you and said, Hey Dad, huh, kind of an interesting discussion at school today.
00:31:35.000 I mean, it's kind of accepted, right?
00:31:38.000 That the Civil War was about slavery.
00:31:40.000 But then our teacher brought up a point that Lincoln said that he would, if he could maintain the union, he would do it without feeding, uh, freeing one slave.
00:31:50.000 Is that a mindblower or what?
00:31:52.000 In other words, we could have had a scenario with a unified union and slavery still going.
00:31:58.000 I mean, it would have been abolished soon, probably naturally.
00:32:01.000 You know, the free market of ideas, but I just thought that was kind of interesting.
00:32:05.000 I'm going to make a mobile of it with Lincoln and some freed slaves.
00:32:08.000 It sort of hangs over...
00:32:10.000 Not bad.
00:32:11.000 Remember all those stupid projects you do?
00:32:12.000 It's about spiders, and I want you to do a drawing of a spider, and make a spider out of clay, and then make a spider mobile, and then write spider on a big piece of foam core, and have that up, and it'll be like, all about the spider!
00:32:23.000 What?
00:32:23.000 I mean, did we retain any of that?
00:32:27.000 Well, what are you suggesting, Gav?
00:32:30.000 I don't know.
00:32:30.000 Look, you know what would be more effective?
00:32:35.000 A giant field where they could just frolic all day.
00:32:38.000 Surrounded by a giant fence so they can't get out and get hit by a car.
00:32:41.000 And you just play.
00:32:42.000 That's it.
00:32:43.000 You play from zero to... 13?
00:32:49.000 13 we do your O-levels, as they used to do in the UK in the 60s, and we see who should really pursue education, STEM and other important stuff.
00:32:58.000 You know what the percentage will be?
00:32:59.000 5%.
00:33:02.000 95% will be better off never being educated ever.
00:33:07.000 They will get trades, they will build homes, they will be pillars of the community, and then we'll have all these highly educated people who are smart people and they will do smart stuff.
00:33:19.000 Okay, Gav, but what if someone is, like some kid, is just obsessed with cars from the age of five on?
00:33:28.000 All right.
00:33:29.000 On the perimeter of the frolic fence, we have some experts.
00:33:34.000 And if this kid is obsessed with sharks, come here, Joey.
00:33:38.000 And he leaves the frolic center and we get him alone and he can just go bananas on sharks, watch shark docks.
00:33:44.000 Talk to sharkologists.
00:33:45.000 We'll bring these guys in.
00:33:47.000 He can learn all about marine biology.
00:33:49.000 Then he can probably, at 13, he's probably better off interning at some orca center.
00:33:54.000 Working with, with, I forget what they're called, oceanologists?
00:33:56.000 What do you call these guys?
00:33:58.000 Working with those dudes.
00:34:00.000 Now you just find, you just found one of your five percenters early.
00:34:04.000 All right, but what about someone who shows no interest at all at O-levels and doesn't want anything?
00:34:10.000 I think they should go to work!
00:34:12.000 I think they should be waitresses.
00:34:14.000 Your waitress can be 13.
00:34:15.000 The guy mowing your lawn, we don't need illegal aliens doing this.
00:34:19.000 And people always say in California, they go, a world without Mexicans?
00:34:22.000 Oh my God.
00:34:23.000 California was shut down in a day.
00:34:25.000 I can't imagine a world without illegals.
00:34:27.000 I can, it's called Canada.
00:34:29.000 And you know who cleans your pool in Canada?
00:34:32.000 Me, when I was 14.
00:34:34.000 You know who mows your lawn in Canada?
00:34:35.000 Me, when I was 13.
00:34:37.000 You know who delivers the papers?
00:34:38.000 The paper boy.
00:34:40.000 The archetypal paper boy.
00:34:41.000 With the little red baseball hat.
00:34:43.000 Throwing them on the porch and getting mad.
00:34:45.000 Getting the owner of the house mad because it bonked off one of the plants.
00:34:52.000 So much of school is a total bullshit lie.
00:34:56.000 College campuses, obviously they're long gone.
00:34:58.000 But I'm going back now to zero.
00:35:00.000 No, my youngest, Johnny, he loves his pre-K thing, and they do paint and stuff, and they joke around.
00:35:06.000 That should be it.
00:35:07.000 Teach them to read, but they don't care about history.
00:35:10.000 They're not being taught the real history.
00:35:12.000 And as far as the basics of society go, and what is the Constitution, and who was George Washington, we can really catch up on that in a year.
00:35:22.000 We could take a 14-year-old and just really... You ready for an intense year?
00:35:27.000 Here we go, 10 hours a day of the Constitution.
00:35:29.000 Imagine how refined they would be if we did it that way.
00:35:33.000 But these lazy teachers with their bloated unions who are unfireable, they basically have to have sex with the students to get fired.
00:35:41.000 These lazy bastards.
00:35:43.000 I look back at my education, remember the VCR being rolled into the room?
00:35:47.000 How often did that happen?
00:35:49.000 Now I'm, it's obviously the DVD player or they just go to Netflix, but we would watch things like Ghostbusters or anything remotely historical like Mel Gibson with that, or was it John Adams movie?
00:36:03.000 The Patriot.
00:36:05.000 And the teacher would just sit on his ass and do crossword puzzles for the hour and a half the movie played.
00:36:10.000 Or the biggest racket in school is this stupid public speaking.
00:36:15.000 It's very important that kids know how to do public speaking.
00:36:19.000 Very crucial.
00:36:20.000 And I'm thinking, why?
00:36:23.000 I mean, every business I've been at, there's the head sales guy, the mover and shaker guy at Rebel, it's Ezra Levant, and he's the guy who can sum up the company and tantalize investors and pitch ideas.
00:36:36.000 No one else needs that skill.
00:36:38.000 You just need the one rep, and he should be high up in the company.
00:36:41.000 No one wants to talk to an intern.
00:36:43.000 So this one articulate rep, every company has one or two.
00:36:48.000 Not everyone has to do that.
00:36:48.000 It's again, it's a rare skill to be able to walk in the room and go, all right, it's called PayPal.
00:36:54.000 And what you do is you pay money on your computer.
00:36:58.000 No financial transaction, no money is touched hands.
00:37:01.000 It's all digital, all binary.
00:37:03.000 I'll get a little piece and become a billionaire, but you're still way better off.
00:37:08.000 Does everyone at PayPal have to explain that to you?
00:37:10.000 No, they don't.
00:37:12.000 But we would do this thing, I'm sure you did it too, and my kids still do it now, where you do a presentation.
00:37:17.000 The history of tarantulas, or the most dangerous tarantulas in the world.
00:37:21.000 Tarantulas are much more common in the Caribbean and blah blah blah, where it's more suitable for their environment.
00:37:26.000 It's too cold up here.
00:37:28.000 And you get up and you do that stupid presentation about Leonardo da Vinci, how he invented the helicopter before anyone, and here's a drawing he did, looks just like a helicopter, and he also painted the Mona Lisa.
00:37:37.000 Wow, I couldn't learn that in one second on Wikipedia.
00:37:41.000 And you present that to the class while the lazy fat-ass teacher who gets paid $60 an hour.
00:37:47.000 No, they don't.
00:37:47.000 They only make $40,000 a year.
00:37:49.000 Yeah, that's how little they work, dude.
00:37:51.000 They get off four months a year.
00:37:53.000 No, they're working on their lessons for the next day.
00:37:55.000 They work late.
00:37:57.000 Every year they have to redo their whole lesson plan.
00:37:59.000 That's a load of crap.
00:38:02.000 So, they're working so little that $60 an hour becomes $45,000.
00:38:08.000 And you've got to read The Worm and the Apple by Peter Brimel.
00:38:10.000 That's on my book show that came out before Christmas.
00:38:14.000 And so we do these presentations, remember?
00:38:17.000 You'd all do one, and it would be 20 minutes or whatever.
00:38:20.000 And then, as if we couldn't get any lazier, the students would grade the other students.
00:38:30.000 So I'd be sitting there reading Brian's talk about the history of glass and the Venetians and how Italy played such a crucial point part of the history of glass.
00:38:42.000 I'll give you a B- Brian because we're pals and you did a terrible job.
00:38:48.000 And that's important too because we're learning how to grade.
00:38:51.000 That is a lie.
00:38:53.000 I'm gonna wager 95% of education from top to bottom is total and utter BS.
00:39:02.000 Ben Carson would have been a brain surgeon in my crazy utopia where kids just frolic all day.
00:39:08.000 Now, the reason I call this a theory of fact is I actually know someone like this.
00:39:14.000 I know of him.
00:39:15.000 I go to this anarchist punk farm commune called Dial House every year and hang out with white-haired punks like me and they're all, none of them are right-wing, I'm the only one.
00:39:27.000 But they're all pretty rational people and the great thing about these old anarchist hippie punks is they want to discuss it.
00:39:36.000 Why do you want to kill Mugabe?
00:39:38.000 I didn't say I want to kill him.
00:39:39.000 I said, I can't believe he's alive.
00:39:41.000 Well, don't you understand that the American government is propping him up?
00:39:45.000 I mean, he's just a puppet.
00:39:47.000 What?
00:39:48.000 Why?
00:39:48.000 What's in it for them?
00:39:49.000 Well, diamonds.
00:39:50.000 I mean, the resources.
00:39:52.000 What?
00:39:53.000 What, do they need a route to get the diamonds out?
00:39:55.000 Isn't Zimbabwe touching the water?
00:39:57.000 Show up in a boat.
00:39:58.000 Get all you want.
00:39:59.000 Mugabe's desperate to sell them.
00:40:02.000 It's easier just to buy stuff.
00:40:04.000 You don't need to prop up despots, at least not in Rhodesia.
00:40:09.000 Anyway, that's a typical conversation.
00:40:11.000 And I know of this kid who grew up there on that farm, on that Atlanticus commune, and his name was Nemo, I believe.
00:40:18.000 And he went to a frolic institution, where they just say, whatever you want.
00:40:23.000 You can sit on your ass all day.
00:40:24.000 Here's some books.
00:40:25.000 Here's some notebooks.
00:40:26.000 Here's a guitar.
00:40:27.000 Do what you want.
00:40:28.000 And he took up guitar and became a master guitar player.
00:40:32.000 But I don't think he's that happy, and I don't think it really panned out that great.
00:40:36.000 Now, I'm not sure, but this isn't an example, and again, it's very anecdotal, but this is an example of some guy becoming Jimi Hendrix because he was given the opportunity and everyone else thriving.
00:40:46.000 But I, again, I don't know much about that school, so I shouldn't say that it's an example that's contradicting my thesis here, because I don't know enough about that school.
00:40:55.000 But I am prepared
00:40:57.000 I don't know.
00:41:14.000 I said, school is bullshit.
00:41:16.000 It's all a lie.
00:41:18.000 Going to class with your books, your lunchbox, recess, it's all a giant daycare.
00:41:25.000 The kids are not getting educated, they're not getting smarter, they're not necessarily benefiting.
00:41:31.000 Sports is probably way better for a kid.
00:41:33.000 You're probably learning about competition and you're learning how to lose, which is the most important lesson an entrepreneur has to take.
00:41:40.000 The best way to become an entrepreneur is to be able to take it on the chin and say, out of my past 11 businesses, 11 have failed, but I'm feeling good about this one.
00:41:51.000 Getting back on the horse is how you make money in America.
00:41:56.000 My son, when we were skiing, he was getting bored of snowboarding, and I switched back to skiing.
00:42:01.000 I was a skier as a kid, then I went to snowboarding in the 90s because it was cool, and then 47 on a snowboard is not a good look.
00:42:10.000 Especially because I haven't really been skiing that much.
00:42:13.000 I would go like at Sundance or something.
00:42:15.000 Everyone wears a helmet now.
00:42:18.000 When I was a kid, a helmet was for a handicapped person.
00:42:22.000 If you had a helmet on, people felt sorry for you.
00:42:25.000 And I would say 90% of the people on hills wear helmets.
00:42:27.000 Kids, moms, dads, their goggles on their helmet.
00:42:30.000 What, are you going to bonk your noggin?
00:42:31.000 What are you, Sonny Bono's great-grandson?
00:42:34.000 Are you traumatized?
00:42:35.000 Did you know Liam Neeson's wife?
00:42:37.000 There's been like two accidents.
00:42:39.000 What are you going to do, hit a tree with your head?
00:42:41.000 Or are you Wile E. Coyote chasing a roadrunner?
00:42:45.000 Chill out, dude.
00:42:47.000 The hills are not rampant with head injuries.
00:42:51.000 I skied.
00:42:52.000 In Canada, you ski every weekend.
00:42:55.000 It's not an upper-middle-class thing.
00:42:57.000 There's blue-collar kids.
00:42:58.000 You just wear jeans.
00:42:59.000 You'd have used skis.
00:43:01.000 Sometimes you'd just sneak on the hill with a fake pass.
00:43:06.000 We played Chinese downhill and we just rammed into each other on the hill, pushed each other off.
00:43:10.000 It was fun.
00:43:11.000 It was violent as hell.
00:43:13.000 It's a hoser sport.
00:43:14.000 It's sort of like, you know, you see Caddyshack and you see that golf also had a blue-collar tinge to it.
00:43:20.000 Anyway, not one helmet for a million miles, and not one head injury for a million miles.
00:43:25.000 I even hate seeing people on bicycles with their helmet on.
00:43:27.000 I might bonk my noggin!
00:43:29.000 Ew, aren't you a dad?
00:43:31.000 I know, but I could fall forward and I'd bonk my head.
00:43:34.000 What are you, Ned Flanders?
00:43:36.000 You need a helmet for your noggily-doggily?
00:43:40.000 God damn it, it's downright embarrassing.
00:43:42.000 I feel sorry for them.
00:43:43.000 Again, I feel red-pilled.
00:43:44.000 I feel like crying.
00:43:45.000 You've been duped by the stupid helmet industry.
00:43:47.000 It's like water.
00:43:49.000 I might get dehydrated.
00:43:51.000 I better bring a three litre bottle of water in my giant fucking purse.
00:43:55.000 Yes, you should.
00:43:56.000 Because we are all familiar with the number of women who have died of dehydration walking down the streets of New York.
00:44:01.000 Oh yeah, that's zero.
00:44:02.000 Well, we're all familiar with the brutal head injuries on ski slopes.
00:44:05.000 Yeah, that's two.
00:44:06.000 Well, we're all familiar with the terrible head injuries cyclists get.
00:44:10.000 Eh, three?
00:44:11.000 Four?
00:44:11.000 Not really a thing.
00:44:16.000 Anyway, I was saying to my boy, he goes, OK, you switch to skis.
00:44:19.000 I want to switch to skis.
00:44:20.000 I don't like the snowboarding thing.
00:44:21.000 And I said to him, hey, look at me.
00:44:23.000 We're McInnes's.
00:44:25.000 McInnes's don't quit.
00:44:27.000 We get fired.
00:44:27.000 I think I'm going to make a t-shirt of that.
00:44:34.000 It's definitely going to be a tweet.
00:44:36.000 You can take that to the bank.
00:44:40.000 So yeah, that was a big epiphany I had.
00:44:43.000 One, two, three, education.
00:44:45.000 Now, number four, we are living in incredibly racist times.
00:44:51.000 That is another epiphany I had.
00:44:53.000 What?
00:44:54.000 I thought, Gavin, you said that racism doesn't exist.
00:44:56.000 This Jim Gaffigan second person character I do is getting a little tedious, isn't it?
00:45:02.000 Sorry.
00:45:03.000 It's a conversational crutch I use in my presentations.
00:45:07.000 But I have said that racism doesn't exist.
00:45:09.000 And I was talking about racism towards blacks.
00:45:11.000 I was saying racism towards visible minorities is probably 1% of the population are bonafide bigots.
00:45:18.000 And I was talking about white people.
00:45:19.000 1% of white people are bonafide bigots.
00:45:23.000 But, as I said to John Williams on his show, they don't spray paint stuff on buildings, they don't burn churches.
00:45:31.000 They go, screw you, racial epithet!
00:45:34.000 And then whip a beer out the window.
00:45:36.000 They're not a floral people.
00:45:37.000 They're very blunt.
00:45:39.000 Because they're dumb.
00:45:42.000 But then I'm watching this, I went to see Jumanji, which by the way,
00:45:47.000 Rules!
00:45:49.000 What an amazing movie to take your kids to.
00:45:53.000 It is so good.
00:45:54.000 There's no SJW stuff.
00:45:56.000 Yes, the girl can kick ass and do triple backflips.
00:45:59.000 She's a fictional video game character.
00:46:02.000 They're in a magical weirdo land.
00:46:04.000 Where a hippo will eat you and you don't die.
00:46:05.000 You just come out of the sky again and you lost one of your lives.
00:46:08.000 It's a magical fairyland.
00:46:09.000 So I don't mind seeing women kick ass when they concede that it's weird.
00:46:12.000 In fact, the woman kicking the ass is freaked out that she can kick ass.
00:46:15.000 And Jack Black plays a vapid, hot, blonde chick who's obsessed with her phone.
00:46:21.000 Who, like, literally can't even with this place.
00:46:25.000 It even kind of makes fun of this cuck Indian dude who's always following around this black guy because he wants to be cool.
00:46:31.000 And then the roles are reversed and he realizes what a loser he's been.
00:46:34.000 And the black guy realizes that he had an ego problem and he was treating his friends like crap.
00:46:40.000 And that's me enforcing politics on it because you asked.
00:46:44.000 But none of that is even remotely in your face.
00:46:46.000 I'm just saying if you were to force a litmus test on it, you would come out pink.
00:46:51.000 Good to go.
00:46:55.000 I'm watching that.
00:46:56.000 I should maybe talk about some of the movies I've watched on this Christmas vacation.
00:47:03.000 Okay, I will take a minor tangent here to do some movie reviews.
00:47:07.000 Shockingly dull films!
00:47:09.000 And it kind of goes back to my education thing.
00:47:12.000 And jobs, and mentors, and affirmative action, and teamwork, and all this crap.
00:47:16.000 And the lack of jobs.
00:47:17.000 I have a theory.
00:47:19.000 Again, this is just on the chalkboard.
00:47:21.000 That we are denying young people the right to work by having illegal aliens do their jobs.
00:47:26.000 They're losing their economic libido, but they're losing their substance.
00:47:29.000 And you're supposed to write about what you know, and I think a lot of these writers, they haven't had enough life experience to convey a story.
00:47:37.000 And I'm watching Blade Runner, and Ryan Gosling's job is to go shoot expired replicants, humanoid cyborgs, and he's bored out of his mind.
00:47:48.000 And you're watching it going, yeah, I know cops.
00:47:52.000 They loved their days human hunting.
00:47:56.000 Most retired cops you talk to who worked the worst shifts in the Lower East Side in the housing projects, they go, yeah, I kind of miss it, actually.
00:48:03.000 I mean, it was kind of scary, but it was really, really intense and thrilling.
00:48:07.000 And I miss human hunting.
00:48:11.000 So I'm watching it thinking, this writer doesn't know life.
00:48:14.000 He's not conveying a story because he hasn't lived enough.
00:48:17.000 So that movie was turned off.
00:48:19.000 Unfathomably dull.
00:48:22.000 And the other problem, of course, with movies is social justice warrior crap.
00:48:24.000 They have to inject that in and make Atomic Blonde, Charlie's Throne is beating up ten guys.
00:48:30.000 And I'm even seeing this in the Post.
00:48:32.000 So the Post was about the Pentagon Papers.
00:48:34.000 It's so dull.
00:48:35.000 Meryl Streep and Tom Hanks are like aristocrats.
00:48:38.000 I didn't make it through the whole movie, by the way, so maybe... I heard David Cross and Bob Odenkirk are great in it.
00:48:42.000 I'm sure they are.
00:48:45.000 But she's acting like this aristocrat, all this pomp and circumstance, because look at the newspapers.
00:48:51.000 And correct me if I'm wrong, but didn't the New York Times break the Pentagon Papers story?
00:48:55.000 Why is the Post the central focus of this movie?
00:48:58.000 Washington Post.
00:49:00.000 A newsroom is just people screaming at each other.
00:49:03.000 I've worked in newsrooms.
00:49:04.000 It's mania.
00:49:06.000 And it's just people, it's like everyone there just did a line.
00:49:08.000 They don't flounce around.
00:49:11.000 Hello darling, I'm so sorry.
00:49:13.000 So I've been going over these documents all night and I feel that it's time that we spoke to Nixon's daughter about going to her wedding.
00:49:20.000 No, m'lord?
00:49:22.000 No, m'lord.
00:49:24.000 So it is so boring, it's physically painful.
00:49:28.000 They make it all about Nixon and trying to hide the Pentagon Papers.
00:49:33.000 Again, the Pentagon Papers were secret documents that said that the government was botching Vietnam.
00:49:38.000 They didn't want anyone to see it.
00:49:40.000 Nixon didn't start that war.
00:49:42.000 He ended it.
00:49:42.000 And he didn't want those papers out because it was bad for America.
00:49:45.000 It was actually good for his rep, for those papers.
00:49:48.000 So it's social justice warrior crap.
00:49:50.000 It's like in The Crown where they have JFK having temper tantrums because Jackie O is too popular.
00:49:56.000 That's not true.
00:49:57.000 You're lying.
00:50:00.000 So I had to turn that off.
00:50:01.000 That was dull.
00:50:02.000 Then there's The Lost City of Z, which is an amazing book I featured in my, uh, on my book episode.
00:50:07.000 They managed to ruin that.
00:50:08.000 I'm just walking around the jungle with two British guys.
00:50:10.000 Just going, what are you guys doing here?
00:50:11.000 Get out of there.
00:50:13.000 That was brutally dull.
00:50:16.000 But, um...
00:50:17.000 Then, I get free movies because of the SAG, I'm in the Writer's Guild for my TV writing days, and so I have a big pile of Hollywood movies, and they're just, me and my brother are like, nope, nope, nope, just throwing boring movies in a pile, or leaving if someone else is watching and enjoying them.
00:50:33.000 But, uh, the disaster artist is so good, I didn't want it to end.
00:50:39.000 It's James Franco doing... You know, by the way, The Room is this terrible movie done by this Polish mental case, who I think got a bunch of money in the car accident and was just rich, and his head is broken, and he made the worst movie ever made called The Room.
00:50:51.000 So this is a movie that includes sort of a remake of The Room within it, but it's about the making of The Room and how they got there and this Tommy Wiseau character and how weird he is.
00:51:01.000 And James Franco plays him better than Tommy Wiseau does.
00:51:05.000 He's better at Tommy Wiseau than Tommy Wiseau.
00:51:07.000 So that's two great movies.
00:51:09.000 Jumanji and The Disaster Artist.
00:51:12.000 Okay, I'm down to my tangent.
00:51:13.000 I'm ready to come back to Earth.
00:51:14.000 So I'm sitting in the theater and I'm in a black neighborhood watching it and uh...
00:51:19.000 It's a very different experience.
00:51:21.000 They are very vocal people.
00:51:22.000 Lots of comments, lots of two cents going on.
00:51:25.000 They are not the most punctual group, generally.
00:51:30.000 So the theater's pretty much empty if you're there on time and then it slowly fills up.
00:51:34.000 A lot of condiments, a lot of nacho plates and really getting settled in.
00:51:38.000 Sitting down takes a, it's like sort of setting up a campsite.
00:51:41.000 There's a lot of sort of getting acclimated.
00:51:43.000 I'm not saying any of this is good or bad.
00:51:45.000 Just noticing a slight cultural pattern here in New York City.
00:51:50.000 And I can also sort of smell the vibe.
00:51:53.000 And there's sort of disdain and, oh, that looks good.
00:51:59.000 I saw the movie Slither in Harlem once.
00:52:02.000 And this woman next to me goes, this movie's corny.
00:52:07.000 This ain't scary.
00:52:08.000 It's like a comedy horror movie.
00:52:10.000 She yells that out in the middle of the film.
00:52:14.000 We're good to go.
00:52:31.000 And I turn around and go, are you out of your mind?
00:52:33.000 And then I look at his mother and she's just eating popcorn and not even looking at me.
00:52:37.000 And her attitude was just, you don't have a problem with me, you have a problem with him.
00:52:40.000 Like, you handle it with him.
00:52:41.000 That's not my, not my affairs.
00:52:44.000 Take it up with a eight-year-old who's kicking your chair.
00:52:47.000 So I had to yell at him while she just didn't even flinch, not, didn't look at us, didn't acknowledge us.
00:52:52.000 And I know it was his mom because there was empty seats around.
00:52:57.000 Anyway, so we're watching these trailers, and there's a trailer out for the Wallace and Gromit dudes, who did a movie, uh, called Bronze Age, I think, or something?
00:53:06.000 Cavemen?
00:53:07.000 And it's about when we went from the Stone Age to the Bronze Age.
00:53:11.000 When I say we, what did I mean there?
00:53:14.000 Did I mean white people?
00:53:15.000 No, I meant civilization.
00:53:19.000 This is why I'm so mad about these Confederate statues being taken down.
00:53:23.000 As one of the guys I interviewed about it in New Orleans said, he said, yes, there are terrible things about that man.
00:53:30.000 This is a path we all took together, and we're all here together now.
00:53:35.000 You get me?
00:53:36.000 You know, this notion that you have your history, and I have my history, and we have Black History Month, that is self-segregation.
00:53:44.000 We're all the same team.
00:53:47.000 We're all from Africa.
00:53:48.000 Doom, doom, doom, de-doom, doom, doom.
00:53:51.000 We all left Africa.
00:53:53.000 Some guys went so far north, they were going snow blind unless they had squinty eyes.
00:53:57.000 They became Chinese.
00:53:58.000 Then they crossed the Bering Strait, they became Native Americans.
00:54:02.000 Some guys weren't getting enough sun, so their skin got lighter and lighter and lighter, so they get maximum vitamin D. Their hair became blonde to get more light on them.
00:54:12.000 We changed.
00:54:13.000 We morphed.
00:54:14.000 We're all the same team.
00:54:16.000 And to say otherwise is the dictionary definition of racist.
00:54:20.000 So I'm watching this thing, this Bronze Age, and the trailer.
00:54:24.000 It looks really good, by the way.
00:54:26.000 And when I say really good for a kid's movie, I don't mean you go there as an adult, you fool.
00:54:30.000 Don't go to Spider-Man with a 20-year-old, you millennials.
00:54:34.000 Goddammit, I went to see Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs, and I sat down in front of a guy and he went,
00:54:42.000 And I said, is there a problem here?
00:54:43.000 And he goes, what?
00:54:44.000 Of all the places, sit.
00:54:45.000 And then this theater was almost empty.
00:54:46.000 You have to sit right near me.
00:54:48.000 And I go, I'm sorry if my children ruined your children's movie.
00:54:52.000 It's cloudy with a chance of meatballs!
00:54:55.000 Or when I went to see Tin Tin.
00:54:57.000 You know, the Hergé cartoonist guy?
00:55:00.000 The little dog?
00:55:02.000 We walk in, me and coincidentally like four other families were all coming at the same time, and they all had like three kids, so just a mob of families and kids at the same time.
00:55:10.000 And I see this old lady there, she's probably 58, and kind of a classy New York broad, this was in the East Village, and I see her going, oh shit!
00:55:22.000 And she marches down the steps and leaves.
00:55:25.000 I assume not getting her money back.
00:55:27.000 Because children showed up to a fucking cartoon.
00:55:32.000 Anyway, and I was with this black family next to me, and I sensed them just rolling their eyes, totally disinterested.
00:55:39.000 Now when Black Panther comes on, the trailer for Black Panther, everything's all eyeballs and talkity-talkity.
00:55:45.000 And it reminded me of- Black Panther's basically just Hamilton, right?
00:55:48.000 It's like, I'm gonna take a story and make sure it's only black people.
00:55:50.000 Uh, I don't like hearing about dead presidents and white men.
00:55:54.000 Why- why is it when we look at America's history, it's all white men?
00:55:58.000 I don't know, cause those were the demographics at the time.
00:56:00.000 Why do you care?
00:56:01.000 Do you hear white immigrants in Japan bitching about how everyone's Japanese?
00:56:05.000 Who cares?
00:56:06.000 Why are- why do you have disdain for that?
00:56:08.000 I don't even like the name Shaniqua.
00:56:11.000 I forget who said this.
00:56:13.000 But Ann Coulter made fun of her, maybe it was Robin Simone on The View.
00:56:18.000 But giving your kid a name like Shaniqua or Darrell, Tahal, Johnson, all those, I'm gonna call them stupid names, yes.
00:56:26.000 What you're saying is, I feel like a cuck if I name my kid Michelle Obama.
00:56:31.000 Michelle Obama's dad was one of the best dads in the world.
00:56:34.000 He struggled, he got out of bed, he had cystic fibrosis or something, he walked with those weird forearm crutches, stuck by his wife, stuck by his family.
00:56:43.000 Named his daughter Michelle.
00:56:44.000 She's pretty good for herself.
00:56:46.000 Neil deGrasse Tyson's dad.
00:56:47.000 Stuck around there for his boy.
00:56:49.000 His boy seems to be getting into astronomy.
00:56:51.000 Here's a telescope, kid.
00:56:52.000 I'll try to figure out how to work it with you.
00:56:54.000 Oh, here we go.
00:56:55.000 Orion's Belt.
00:56:56.000 Cool.
00:56:56.000 We figured it out.
00:56:57.000 High five, pal.
00:57:00.000 Named his kid Neil.
00:57:01.000 That's a good name.
00:57:04.000 But this whole idea that, no, I don't want to be part of your world.
00:57:07.000 Well, it's not my world.
00:57:08.000 It's our world.
00:57:08.000 It's America.
00:57:10.000 Why do you have to have a Kwanzaa?
00:57:12.000 Like, a black Santa.
00:57:13.000 Why do you need a black Santa?
00:57:14.000 What's the matter with a white Santa?
00:57:16.000 And then I had my second big epiphany of the holidays.
00:57:19.000 America is a racist country.
00:57:20.000 There is some racial animosity towards whites in this country.
00:57:24.000 The Black Santa, the Black Panther, the Hamilton.
00:57:27.000 You can't learn about American history unless we make the guys in it black and Puerto Rican.
00:57:31.000 I even saw a picture of the cast and crew of Hamilton and they were waving a Puerto Rican flag.
00:57:36.000 What?
00:57:38.000 When did we get Puerto Rico?
00:57:39.000 Like 1925?
00:57:39.000 Now I have to look that up.
00:57:44.000 When did we get Puerto Rico?
00:57:48.000 Second most asked question is why did we get Puerto Rico?
00:57:51.000 Pretty long ago, sure.
00:57:51.000 Okay, 1898.
00:57:56.000 And I don't know, I just thought that bothers me.
00:57:59.000 It doesn't bother me to see blacks and Puerto Ricans on stage doing Hamilton.
00:58:02.000 Of course it doesn't.
00:58:04.000 It bothers me that it bothers you to have white guys.
00:58:08.000 And you know it doesn't go the same way.
00:58:10.000 You know that if we got Conan O'Brien to play Martin Luther King in a huge four-hour miniseries on A&E, you would have a heart attack.
00:58:22.000 In fact, remember how mad everyone got, the whole Asian-American community, when we had Matt Damon in that Great Wall of China movie?
00:58:29.000 That was a horrible thing.
00:58:30.000 Or, a lot of people are convinced that Egyptians were black.
00:58:33.000 I don't know why.
00:58:34.000 I think it's because on the Tutankhamun's coffin they would paint his slaves on it and stuff, so they said, oh, you must have looked like Idris Elba.
00:58:43.000 But no, they looked like Anthony Cumia.
00:58:45.000 Jesus looked like Anthony Cumia.
00:58:47.000 The Egyptians just looked like slightly dark Italianos.
00:58:51.000 They looked like Sicilians.
00:58:54.000 But if you portray Egypt as anyone who doesn't look like Don Cheadle, then you're whitewashing history.
00:59:01.000 And that's BS.
00:59:03.000 And it's also BS that you have a problem with white people.
00:59:06.000 I never used to care about black Santas until this year when I noticed it was more common.
00:59:10.000 Like my Home Depot, which is in a black area, had all black Santas.
00:59:14.000 Not one white Santa, but tons of black Santas.
00:59:17.000 And I think, obviously I'm not tossing and turning all night.
00:59:21.000 I'm going, no, you can't desecrate Santa.
00:59:23.000 That's what the left says.
00:59:24.000 That's their trick is they go, Oh, it looks like someone's real scared of a black Santa.
00:59:28.000 Woo.
00:59:30.000 And I go, no, no, no, no, no.
00:59:31.000 That's not my beef.
00:59:32.000 My beef is why are you scared of a white Santa?
00:59:35.000 Why is that an issue?
00:59:36.000 Why should that bother you that a huge part of America's history is German and a huge part of the evolution of Christianity is combined with paganism.
00:59:45.000 And our traditions have a lot of Nordic and Northern European folklore.
00:59:50.000 Entangled in them.
00:59:51.000 That's our journey together.
00:59:53.000 We're all here now.
00:59:55.000 We're all here in New York City.
00:59:56.000 What a crazy, mad, Dutch, gangs in New York, Industrial Revolution, Abolition, Civil War, American Revolution.
01:00:04.000 What a wild ride it's been, everyone.
01:00:08.000 Why are you saying, no, no, no, no, no.
01:00:09.000 I live over here.
01:00:10.000 I celebrate Kwanzaa.
01:00:11.000 I have a black Santa.
01:00:12.000 I named my kids Shaniqua.
01:00:14.000 Why?
01:00:15.000 What's the matter with Michelle?
01:00:17.000 What's the matter with a white Santa?
01:00:21.000 It's racism!
01:00:23.000 It's racist not to assimilate.
01:00:27.000 That's what I'm screaming.
01:00:28.000 And it's, it's, that's probably considered a racist thing to say.
01:00:30.000 And Siddiq Khan, mayor of, uh, of London, said the opposite.
01:00:35.000 He said, immigrants, I want you to know, you don't have to- I gotta just double check, because I always screw up the, uh, the Breitbart editor in London.
01:00:45.000 Yeah, Siddiq Khan, I got it right.
01:00:47.000 He said, don't assimilate.
01:00:48.000 It's not your job.
01:00:49.000 There's no obligation to assimilate.
01:00:50.000 What?
01:00:51.000 What is a country?
01:00:53.000 Haven't you seen Thor, Ragnarok, or whatever it's called?
01:00:56.000 Which also is an amazing movie to take the kids to.
01:01:00.000 Ragnarok?
01:01:01.000 In Ragnarok, spoiler alert, they blow up Thor's hometown.
01:01:08.000 And Thor goes, we're not a land.
01:01:11.000 It's not a problem.
01:01:12.000 We're a people.
01:01:12.000 We'll just set up shop nearby.
01:01:14.000 Obviously, it's a bummer you lose your entire village.
01:01:16.000 But we'll just build a new city.
01:01:18.000 We are a people.
01:01:20.000 I thought, yes.
01:01:23.000 Assimilate.
01:01:24.000 Become a Veselian or whatever Thor is.
01:01:28.000 All right.
01:01:29.000 Now it's going to get a little uncomfortable.
01:01:32.000 Here's a, I don't want to call it an epiphany because I don't want to get fired, but here's something my brother and I were talking about.
01:01:39.000 I'm going to pave the way with some... Let me just start with a controversial thing.
01:01:42.000 Domestic abuse seems like bullshit to me.
01:01:44.000 Okay, that's horrible, right?
01:01:46.000 Let's get that out of the way.
01:01:47.000 Now I'm going to contextualize that.
01:01:50.000 First of all, I got in trouble for tweeting this, even amongst my friends.
01:01:55.000 We're good to go.
01:02:14.000 Dove Charney, buddy of mine, started American Apparel, accused of raping a girl and keeping one girl as a sex slave.
01:02:21.000 He had photographic evidence of the rape, and it was clearly not rape.
01:02:26.000 She was laughing and stimulating herself half the time.
01:02:29.000 And the sex slave wasn't working at American Apparel at the time, and he has tons of disgusting texts, sexts, of nudes that she was sending him after the allegation.
01:02:43.000 Terry Richardson, accused of women like Jamie Peck, of raping them.
01:02:48.000 Meanwhile, when New York Magazine does a cover story on it, they realize that Jamie Peck came back ten times for more.
01:02:55.000 This is mostly just people who gave, women who gave a handjob and regretted it a few years later.
01:02:59.000 I've been to Terry's photo shoots.
01:03:02.000 Yes, there was sex going on all the time.
01:03:06.000 Women were throwing themselves at him.
01:03:07.000 It was just a normal thing.
01:03:09.000 I think there was more sex going on in the early 2000s than there are now.
01:03:13.000 It was normal just that girls would go over to Terry's house naked, they'd have an orgy and there'd be dicks and drugs and parties going on.
01:03:21.000 I was never really invited to, or that never really kicked off when I was there.
01:03:25.000 Probably an example of ugly-ism.
01:03:27.000 I also wasn't nuts about being on Terry's dick.
01:03:29.000 I thought he might get kind of bi or something.
01:03:32.000 I did a few nude shoots with him actually.
01:03:34.000 Yeah, I could say he took advantage of me.
01:03:36.000 He took a picture of me standing on my dink.
01:03:38.000 He took a picture of me making a penis watch with my penis wrapped around my wrist.
01:03:42.000 Anyway, so that's two.
01:03:46.000 Now there might be an allegation out there that I don't know about that is true.
01:03:49.000 I'm just telling you my personal experience.
01:03:52.000 Uh, Anthony Cumia.
01:03:54.000 Got in an argument with a girl.
01:03:56.000 She put out on, uh, what is it, Snapchat?
01:03:59.000 Oh, he's beating me.
01:04:01.000 He broke my hand.
01:04:02.000 And then he spends a year in court, has to go to rehab, all this stuff.
01:04:06.000 Not true.
01:04:07.000 Acquitted.
01:04:08.000 His brother, Joe Cumia, his girlfriend, he was leaving her at the time, she goes, I'm gonna beat myself and say you beat me.
01:04:15.000 I've heard this from several chicks, by the way.
01:04:19.000 And, uh, so he set up cameras and he caught her hitting herself with a frying pan.
01:04:25.000 Now, that could- that, by the way, saved his ass.
01:04:27.000 He almost lost all his guns and everything.
01:04:29.000 Now, this could be lies.
01:04:30.000 These are just- like, that's a story I heard about Joe Kumi.
01:04:32.000 I didn't even hear it from him.
01:04:33.000 I think I heard it from his brother.
01:04:36.000 That's four stories.
01:04:37.000 Ooh, that reminds me of the whole Vice thing.
01:04:39.000 Now, there may have been horrible rapes going on.
01:04:42.000 I did hear some weird rumors as I was leaving.
01:04:45.000 Maybe me asking questions about those rumors, saying, what's going on here?
01:04:49.000 Maybe that led to a rift.
01:04:51.000 I don't know.
01:04:52.000 Those are purely hypothetical.
01:04:53.000 I have no evidence.
01:04:54.000 But as far as what I saw with my own eyes...
01:04:57.000 What a stupid, pathetic job Emily Steele did in that Vice expose that came out over the holidays about how Vice is a sexist place to work.
01:05:07.000 Even two of its founders concede.
01:05:10.000 Now, we always manipulated the media, and Emily Steele, she talks like a ballet girl.
01:05:15.000 Hi!
01:05:16.000 I'm doing this article on, like, Vice or whatever!
01:05:19.000 She sounds like a fagheg.
01:05:21.000 And she did the Bill O'Reilly scoop, which I don't know the background with that.
01:05:27.000 Maybe that was a half-assed job, too.
01:05:29.000 But we learned at a young age that it's very easy to manipulate lazy journalists and turn them into publicists.
01:05:36.000 So what Shane and Saroosh did is they said, we have failed.
01:05:40.000 You caught us.
01:05:41.000 And it's terrible.
01:05:43.000 Boom!
01:05:43.000 Absolved of all guilt.
01:05:45.000 And now the story's about them trying to fix it.
01:05:49.000 And the co-founders and Gloria Steinem are working so hard to fix this major problem that they've acknowledged.
01:05:55.000 And now they're feminists, they're part of the team.
01:05:57.000 Nice expose!
01:05:59.000 I know people want me to gloat more because I'm not there, but I'm done.
01:06:03.000 I'm not a social justice warrior.
01:06:04.000 I don't play dirty pool.
01:06:06.000 I stick with the truth.
01:06:07.000 I'm Voltaire.
01:06:09.000 I'll defend your right to the death, to say it.
01:06:12.000 So I read that with an open mind, and I'm reading—one of the things I'm responsible for—it was an interview I did with a rapper named Merz, and the woman, Jessica Hopper, who wrote it,
01:06:23.000 This again is some hot, rich, white girl talking to a rapper from the hood.
01:06:27.000 He's like, shit, I'm getting some attention.
01:06:28.000 I'm horny.
01:06:28.000 You want to hook up?
01:06:30.000 And she goes, nah, yo, but I'll take you to the dog park.
01:06:34.000 You know these white, rich girls?
01:06:35.000 They like to be down with the ghetto culture, yo.
01:06:38.000 So she's like, yo, maybe I'll take you to the dog park when you're down here, yo, because you're a total dog.
01:06:45.000 Anyway, I found that out later.
01:06:47.000 What I did get was a word doc where it just said, hey, can we hook up when I'm in Chicago?
01:06:54.000 And I'm a busy man.
01:06:55.000 Like I said, the newsroom was a busy room.
01:06:56.000 And I just went, sure.
01:06:58.000 Sent it off.
01:06:58.000 Didn't even think about it.
01:07:00.000 Who cares?
01:07:01.000 I always hated rap interviews.
01:07:03.000 They were so badly done.
01:07:05.000 Yo, so what inspired you on your new record?
01:07:09.000 And she was apoplectic, and then that pissed me off.
01:07:12.000 I said, I'll relax you and your precious reputation.
01:07:15.000 So daddy got a lawyer, boom, got some money.
01:07:18.000 I heard, too, she was dating some rappers after that, and I thought, wait, I thought the whole premise of the case was that I dared to imply that you would fornicate with a rapper, and now you are?
01:07:28.000 Half the time with these things, too, when they get their money, they get their friends, and they all go to Italy and have a big fuck fest.
01:07:34.000 So you accuse them of being a slut, and then they get their money, and then they go slut around.
01:07:40.000 That is the pattern I've noticed.
01:07:41.000 Because the law is very old with chastity.
01:07:45.000 And so you call a woman a slut, and the old judge goes, well, no one's gonna marry her.
01:07:50.000 You called her a slut.
01:07:52.000 And you're like, here's a picture of her on a slut walk, sir.
01:07:55.000 Hey, don't slut shame.
01:07:56.000 OK, here's some money.
01:07:58.000 So that was one of the cases and one of the examples of vice being a sexist workplace.
01:08:03.000 And you're like, lady, believe me, I'd love you to have some real examples.
01:08:06.000 But that one is retarded.
01:08:08.000 And I can give you two more.
01:08:10.000 There was one, there was this chick.
01:08:12.000 I had this big pile.
01:08:12.000 Sometimes I would get rookie photographers and I'd just get their whole portfolio and I'd say, I might use some of these.
01:08:18.000 Ryan McGinley was a nobody when I first got him.
01:08:20.000 Terry was a somebody, Terry Richardson, but he just gave me a pile and said, use these whenever you want.
01:08:24.000 So I'm going through these piles and we did a thing on Cuban prostitutes and there was this chick.
01:08:28.000 And she was just in a dirty room, and she looked forlorn.
01:08:31.000 I thought, oh, this will be funny.
01:08:32.000 So I used that picture.
01:08:33.000 And the photographers had told me, everyone's cool.
01:08:35.000 Don't worry about using these pictures.
01:08:36.000 They're all fine.
01:08:37.000 And I brought the photo caption.
01:08:39.000 And because she looks sort of like, I don't know what the word is, lost, kind of deep in thought, but sad.
01:08:45.000 And it was like, Cuban prostitutes, go crazy, blah, blah, blah.
01:08:48.000 And I made the photo caption, I can't believe he didn't go down on me.
01:08:52.000 I thought that was amusing.
01:08:54.000 And she sued him on.
01:08:55.000 And then there was another one, there was this hot black chick.
01:08:59.000 And she had a belt buckle that said, Hot Mama.
01:09:01.000 And I wrote, uh, man, this mama's so hot, it's a wonder her kids don't spend all day beating off thinking about her.
01:09:08.000 Uh, clearly a joke.
01:09:10.000 And if you're in a public place, there's a reasonable expectation of being photographed, but we had highfalutin lawyers at the time that would just settle.
01:09:16.000 So there's three cases where I caused
01:09:20.000 A feminist to sue.
01:09:22.000 Do you think that's an example of a toxic masculinity, a sexist workplace environment?
01:09:28.000 Now, I can't- I left in 08, so God only knows what- I shouldn't even say God only knows.
01:09:33.000 I have no idea what went on after there.
01:09:35.000 Could be the most sexist place on earth?
01:09:37.000 I doubt it.
01:09:38.000 I think what happened was they went to bed with social justice warriors and- and they're cannibals.
01:09:43.000 And if they don't get food, they'll start eating their own.
01:09:46.000 It's like a Nazi skinhead rally.
01:09:48.000 If you had a bunch of Nazi skinhead bands, everyone there would be on the same page.
01:09:54.000 But these Nazis are violent people.
01:09:55.000 So these Nazi skinheads would just start kicking the crap out of each other because that's what they do.
01:10:00.000 And if you don't provide them with punks to beat up or blacks or immigrant grocers, they'll go, well, I'll just have to take it out on you.
01:10:08.000 So that's the problem with getting in bed with these people.
01:10:12.000 They're vicious.
01:10:17.000 All right.
01:10:18.000 We should wind it up soon because it's
01:10:22.000 It's vacation time and my guys are about to leave.
01:10:25.000 But I do have to finish this domestic abuse thing.
01:10:31.000 And yeah, I'll end it with this with this concept because I was also going to say my brother's brilliant epiphany where it says no food is bad food.
01:10:39.000 It's just calories.
01:10:41.000 Fried chicken isn't bad for you.
01:10:42.000 It's how much fried chicken.
01:10:44.000 If you exercised and had just the tiniest bit of variety to avoid scurvy and just burnt as many calories as you took in, you'd be fine.
01:10:52.000 So I was going to go off on that, but that sums it up.
01:10:54.000 But anyway, so this domestic abuse thing, this is a controversial thought I had, and I apologize in advance.
01:11:03.000 So I'm talking about my direct experience.
01:11:05.000 The Vice Exposé was ridiculous.
01:11:08.000 Pathetic.
01:11:11.000 And you know what is ironic about these exposés too?
01:11:13.000 You read it and you go, oh so you sued them because someone made a joke?
01:11:16.000 Or you know what you're doing is you're saying women don't belong in the workforce.
01:11:20.000 You're showing a workforce that had to pay out tens of thousands of dollars for a joke or an inappropriate comment or you were groped at a party.
01:11:28.000 Alright, men shouldn't grope at parties, but you sued.
01:11:32.000 It kind of looks like you don't belong there.
01:11:34.000 Or at least you being there isn't working out very well.
01:11:38.000 So these women, I mean, if I was a, I am an employer, but as an employer, I'm really just going, yeah, I'm not hiring women.
01:11:44.000 Sorry.
01:11:45.000 And I, by the way, I've talked to Wall Street dudes who are starting new hedge funds and stuff and new businesses.
01:11:50.000 And they say, we'll never say this publicly, but they, our number one rule is no broads.
01:11:54.000 I don't care how ugly she is, how cool she is.
01:11:57.000 I don't care if it's your wife.
01:11:58.000 No, no, no woman.
01:12:01.000 So these women are actually setting themselves back in time with all this crap.
01:12:06.000 If something happens to you that's illegal, call the cops.
01:12:08.000 If it's a joke or an inappropriate comment, grow the fuck up.
01:12:12.000 That's what you do at work to kill the time.
01:12:15.000 When I was at the Kumia Network, I pretended to be gay with my relationship with Garrett the Sound Man my entire 600 hours of episodes.
01:12:22.000 It was always talking about Garrett's pants and sexually harassing him.
01:12:26.000 And it was a joke we did where we both pretended to be closeted gays.
01:12:29.000 That's called funny!
01:12:35.000 Anyway, so another experience I had, by the way, and I'm just telling you my experiences.
01:12:44.000 There may be women being beaten within half an inch of their life all over this country.
01:12:48.000 I suspect they're Muslims if you do find a lot of them, but whatever.
01:12:53.000 I bet they're disproportionately non-white, but anyway.
01:12:58.000 I talked to a cop and he said, you know, I get these women and they talk about rape or something and I sit down with them and I say, look, I want you to know something.
01:13:07.000 If that guy's a rapist,
01:13:08.000 That's why I became a cop.
01:13:11.000 I want to catch bad guys.
01:13:13.000 I want to put rapists in jail.
01:13:14.000 That's why I walk the street.
01:13:15.000 I want to catch murderers.
01:13:17.000 I want to catch rapists.
01:13:18.000 I don't really care about pot smokers.
01:13:19.000 I don't really care about noise complaints, speeding, you know?
01:13:22.000 That doesn't get me out of bed.
01:13:24.000 What gets me out of bed is bad guys.
01:13:26.000 I want to put rapists behind bars.
01:13:30.000 But...
01:13:31.000 I don't want to put non-rapists behind bars.
01:13:34.000 And, I want you to know that it's illegal to say someone raped you when they didn't rape you.
01:13:40.000 If this is just revenge or something like that, that's no small beans.
01:13:44.000 It's not like he'll go away for a week and he'll be sorry.
01:13:47.000 He could go away for 15 years.
01:13:48.000 And if we find out that you lied, then he's out of jail and you're in jail.
01:13:53.000 So, if this is the truth, I couldn't be happier.
01:13:57.000 But if it's not the truth, I want you to know there's consequences for that.
01:14:01.000 And I said, whoa, that's trippy.
01:14:02.000 Uh, what would happen?
01:14:03.000 What would the woman say?
01:14:04.000 And he said, I'm just telling you what he said.
01:14:06.000 Don't beat me up.
01:14:08.000 He said 95% of the time the woman would go, yeah, forget it.
01:14:11.000 I was just mad at him.
01:14:11.000 He cheated on me.
01:14:13.000 And my hair went white because I thought, how often does that happen?
01:14:18.000 How many guys are in jail right now?
01:14:21.000 And I had a corrections officer tell me, I've told you this a million times, but I'll say it again.
01:14:26.000 He said, a lot of these guys are here because there's a domestic, a little call for a domestic.
01:14:29.000 And he hit me.
01:14:31.000 Now when that happens, that's like the ball in Indiana Jones.
01:14:34.000 It just starts rolling and rolling and she can drop charges, whatever you want.
01:14:38.000 It's going.
01:14:38.000 There's no, I think with Kumia, she wanted to end it.
01:14:41.000 She goes, no, no, forget it, forget it, forget it.
01:14:42.000 No, too late.
01:14:43.000 It's already, the system is now prosecuting you.
01:14:46.000 So,
01:14:48.000 That ball's rolling.
01:14:50.000 And part of that ball rolling is a restraining order.
01:14:52.000 You can't go near her.
01:14:53.000 So he does, goes to the court, whatever.
01:14:56.000 Maybe he gets away with just like probation or something.
01:14:58.000 I don't know why.
01:15:00.000 But then she'll like him again.
01:15:03.000 And he'll like her.
01:15:04.000 The sex is hot.
01:15:06.000 Remember Camille Paglia got in big trouble for saying that?
01:15:09.000 She said one thing no one ever talks about in these violent relationships is how hot the sex is.
01:15:17.000 But he said, so they'll get back together and they'll move in.
01:15:23.000 And he'll have a sock drawer.
01:15:25.000 He'll have his favorite pies in the oven.
01:15:27.000 He'll live there.
01:15:28.000 He'll have his empanadas in the freezer.
01:15:31.000 And then they'll have another fight.
01:15:33.000 This is a year later.
01:15:34.000 So she calls the cops again.
01:15:36.000 This time, the law doesn't take into account his sock drawer.
01:15:41.000 It doesn't take into account that they went out for dinner last night.
01:15:44.000 All the law sees is someone stalking this poor woman, violating his restraining order, and attacking her yet again.
01:15:52.000 Boom.
01:15:53.000 Prison.
01:15:55.000 I think one CO told me, corrections officer, told me two-thirds of the guys he sees are in there for domestics.
01:16:01.000 Anyway, so this is the crazy part I'm getting to, and I stuff this at the very end because it's the most dangerous, and it's a horrible subject, and I'm sorry to have this thought, but I had this thought.
01:16:17.000 I've been beat up many times.
01:16:19.000 My friends have been beat up, I've beat up people.
01:16:22.000 When I beat up a man, he looks like a circus freak for a week.
01:16:27.000 Remember we had that dude on Matthias Thorpe?
01:16:31.000 He went to an Antifa thing in Boston, at Harvard actually, and he asked a few questions about communism.
01:16:37.000 I think he said, he was a guest on my show, so if you watch my show you're familiar with this.
01:16:41.000 If not, sign up!
01:16:42.000 CRTV.com forward slash Gavin.
01:16:45.000 And remember, this podcast isn't on CRTV.com anymore.
01:16:48.000 You gotta subscribe through Apple Podcasts, iTunes thing, or Google Play.
01:16:55.000 But he got beat up by a big dude at that thing, and he had pumpkin eyes sealed shut with huge black circles under each one for about 10 days.
01:17:08.000 I remember my dad got in a fight with his brother,
01:17:12.000 And a brutal fight that lasted for about an hour.
01:17:16.000 No, no, not an hour.
01:17:18.000 In fighting time, it probably feels like an hour.
01:17:20.000 It's probably like a minute.
01:17:22.000 And his face was a pumpkin the next day.
01:17:25.000 Sorry to use the same vegetable metaphor twice, but you swell it to here.
01:17:29.000 You look like a freak.
01:17:30.000 You look like the elephant man after a fight.
01:17:32.000 Go look up all these mega hat wearers who get punched in the face by men.
01:17:38.000 They are destroyed.
01:17:41.000 Now, I got beat up by guys where you spit up blood the next day.
01:17:49.000 You shit blood the next day.
01:17:50.000 Your eyes are sealed shut for the longest time.
01:17:53.000 Your lips look like you're a racist caricature for about five days.
01:17:59.000 You look like that for that guy from the Tawana Braxton Show, Vince.
01:18:02.000 You look like Vince for a week.
01:18:05.000 You scare kids when you've been beat up by a man.
01:18:09.000 But that's a man.
01:18:11.000 So that's you being able to block and putting up a good fight.
01:18:15.000 If you were to beat a woman the way I've been beaten, she would, I mean, you'd collapse all her cheekbones, her eye cavities, socket, retina would be separated.
01:18:26.000 So all I'm saying is this notion of like the lady with the little dark circle under one of her eyes wearing big sunglasses and saying she bumped into a cupboard,
01:18:37.000 Maybe that stereotype existed, but I don't get how he hit her.
01:18:40.000 Like, have you seen women?
01:18:42.000 You go thwop with your finger, or her kid pinches her, and she's got a brutal black and purple bruise for days.
01:18:50.000 A chick falls off her bike, and it looks like someone took purple spray paint to her legs.
01:18:55.000 That's just bonking your hip on the road.
01:18:57.000 If a man is like, where's my dinner, bitch?
01:19:01.000 I mean, her face would be gone.
01:19:03.000 It would cease to be.
01:19:05.000 He'd break her arms.
01:19:06.000 She'd go flying across the room.
01:19:10.000 So that's my most controversial thought.
01:19:13.000 I had just taken for granted this idea of like, where's my dinner, bitch?
01:19:17.000 And then she has to wear big sunglasses.
01:19:18.000 I went, oh, that's terrible.
01:19:19.000 I hate that guy.
01:19:20.000 I hate the guy in the wife beater.
01:19:22.000 The eponymous wife beater.
01:19:26.000 But I was thinking about it, talking to people this weekend, playing that Peter Thiel game and thinking,
01:19:32.000 Yeah, I don't know if I believe that anymore.
01:19:34.000 Now, I'm not denying domestic abuse.
01:19:35.000 I'm just saying the archetypal image we have of the big sunglasses doesn't physically add up.
01:19:41.000 If I punch a woman, which I would never do unless she hit me 12 times, her face would be destroyed.
01:19:46.000 I wouldn't punch a woman in the face ever, actually.
01:19:49.000 I would never do that.
01:19:49.000 I might just sort of punch her body to get her away.
01:19:52.000 But punching a woman in the face?
01:19:55.000 I mean, Jesus, I've seen what happens when you punch men in the face, and they are destroyed!
01:20:02.000 Anyway, what do you know to be true that everyone else sees as a lie?
01:20:11.000 What do you know to be a fact that no one else knows is a fact?
01:20:16.000 What have you red-pilled yourself on that no one has red-pilled on?
01:20:20.000 And that was the theme of today's podcast.
01:20:22.000 And I think the important takeaway from all this is I think you should be very wary of the word fact.
01:20:29.000 I don't really like it.
01:20:31.000 I don't... I think it should be used very sparingly.
01:20:34.000 You know, scientists used to think the only life that exists is due to Sun.
01:20:40.000 You need light to exist.
01:20:42.000 That's what life is.
01:20:43.000 It comes from light.
01:20:44.000 And then they discovered that there was living organisms within rocks, inside of a rock.
01:20:51.000 An organism was born, lived and died and never saw an ounce of sunlight.
01:20:57.000 So the fact
01:20:59.000 That's right.
01:21:15.000 I am not, I very rarely say I'm positive of this, beyond a shadow of a doubt.
01:21:21.000 Because you're constantly getting new information, it's healthy to debate, you should want to stimulate your brain, have that brain exercise, you should get into arguments with people.
01:21:30.000 But we have a different mentality going on now, and it's a form of secularism.
01:21:34.000 Where there's Black Santa, and there's liberals on Facebook, and there's never Trumpers, and there's
01:21:40.000 Impeach Trump, and then there's the MAGA over here, and we're getting more and more isolated with more and more technology.
01:21:48.000 And I think it's from being too pampered, where we don't enjoy conflict, we don't enjoy fighting, we don't enjoy getting out there and getting our hands dirty, getting into trouble.
01:21:58.000 We're quitters.
01:21:59.000 And we go, man, this is too hard.
01:22:01.000 I'm out.
01:22:02.000 So,
01:22:03.000 I think it's important to play Peter Thiel's game because it's an interesting gauge to see how far down the rabbit hole of truth you're willing to go.
01:22:12.000 But my bigger takeaway of all this is 100% of us should be willing to dive head first into the rabbit hole and just go,
01:22:27.000 Because that's ultimately what makes us happier.
01:22:30.000 You're mentally obese if you don't do that.
01:22:33.000 You're a mental fat pig.
01:22:34.000 And you know what happens to obese people?
01:22:36.000 They die of diabetes.
01:22:38.000 So don't let your brain get diabetes.
01:22:40.000 Don't assume you're right.
01:22:42.000 And always be hammering out the details.
01:22:46.000 You're not a real man unless you change your mind about something serious, something drastic once a year.
01:22:54.000 A complete 90 degree turn on that subject.
01:22:56.000 It means you're not learning.
01:22:57.000 Skateboarders are constantly hurting themselves.
01:22:59.000 You see them in the skate parks.
01:23:00.000 They're not doing tricks they know.
01:23:02.000 They're doing tricks they don't know.
01:23:04.000 Scientists aren't doing experiments where they know the result.
01:23:06.000 They're doing experiments where they could and probably will fail.
01:23:09.000 Entrepreneurs aren't making businesses they know are going to be a huge, smashing success, guaranteed.
01:23:15.000 They're doing businesses, running companies, starting small businesses they hope will succeed.
01:23:19.000 We should all be that way about everything!
01:23:23.000 That's the one fact I know to be true that no one else thinks is true.
01:23:28.000 Thank you, goodnight, and get off my lawn!