Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - Get Off My Lawn Podcast #40 | Marriage is Easy

00:00:00.000 Marriage is easy.

00:00:01.000 Divorce is difficult.

00:00:03.000 I'm not getting divorced.

00:00:05.000 But I know people who are, who have.

00:00:08.000 I'm kind of fascinated by divorce, which isn't a very romantic thing to be fascinated by when you're married, but I don't know, man.

00:00:18.000 I was just with my relatives on the weekend and I was talking to my cousin's wife, whatever the hell that is.

00:00:25.000 And I was saying, so what's going on?

00:00:27.000 You have siblings?

00:00:28.000 She goes, well, yeah, yeah.

00:00:29.000 You know, I have a step sister from my dad's first marriage.

00:00:33.000 Well, I was, my dad left and then that I was adopted by my stepfather and then he, they broke up when I was 18.

00:00:42.000 Then he remarried.

00:00:43.000 So their kids, and this is usually the story, right?

00:00:47.000 For about,

00:00:48.000 50% of the population.

00:00:50.000 Sorry, I just ran down the hallway.

00:00:54.000 And every time I get this explained to me from the children of divorce, which is my generation, Gen X, and everyone after that, I just think, what a mess. 0.52

00:01:06.000 What a terrible mess your parents made.

00:01:09.000 I think that one of the reasons my wife and I are attracted to each other initially is because she comes from two parents who are together, I come from two parents who are together, and we knew we'd both be in it for the long haul.

00:01:20.000 And there are some rocky times!

00:01:24.000 Yeah, there's some ups and downs.

00:01:26.000 In algae I always use it's like moving to China.

00:01:29.000 We have to learn a new language, and you gotta ride it out. 1.00

00:01:33.000 I've lived in China for a while. 0.99

00:01:34.000 It sucks. 0.99

00:01:39.000 Not a very inspiring episode, is it? 0.99

00:01:41.000 Marriage doesn't suck, but... 1.00

00:01:44.000 If you were to move to China, you'd have to learn Chinese and read the Chinese newspaper and eat their gross food, learn about the culture, and then you'd probably get into it. 1.00

00:01:52.000 And then I bet three years in, you're sort of like, Yes, I can say nigga if I'm speaking Mandarin. 1.00

00:02:05.000 It means this.

00:02:07.000 When we were last there,

00:02:09.000 Booyah means no and and uh nigga means that. 1.00

00:02:17.000 So people were always soliciting I'd say you want fake watches blah blah and I just kept saying booyah nigga booyah nigga up and down. 1.00

00:02:24.000 That was a common joke for a while you'd say um that's why I hate chinks so much they're racist they say nigga all the time. 0.95

00:02:32.000 You can't do jokes that funny anymore though they're too complex and people take everything at face value like when I did 0.99

00:02:38.000 A video for Rebel called 10 Things I Hate About the Goddamn Jews. 0.98

00:02:42.000 And it was clearly a parody of people who just read headlines and don't go farther than that. 0.99

00:02:47.000 And then everyone gets mad at the headline.

00:02:50.000 And you go, yeah, that's what you're supposed to do. 0.88

00:02:52.000 You are a parody.

00:02:53.000 You're part of my parody now. 1.00

00:02:55.000 You're in the joke, you dummy. 0.99

00:02:58.000 Wow, that's an intense tangent. 0.99

00:02:59.000 Anyway.

00:03:01.000 Marriage, obviously, there's the easy part at the beginning, and then you start having kids, and there's, you know, you gotta, you decide to move, you move cities, your jobs have ups and downs, and that's when it's like moving to China.

00:03:13.000 That's when it gets tricky.

00:03:15.000 And you just ride it out.

00:03:16.000 You can have a bad year.

00:03:18.000 You sleep in a different room, sleep on the couch. 0.92

00:03:21.000 You're gonna be in the doghouse, especially if you're like me and you're a drunk.

00:03:25.000 There's gonna be some rough patches.

00:03:27.000 But

00:03:29.000 To just give up is a strange phenomenon and I remember as a kid in the 80s my dad's that's when it blew up I would say 1980 before that you would you'd handle it even though my grandmother was divorced in 1955 but um

00:03:46.000 For the most part, it's a baby boomer thing, and they're spoiled brats who ruined the world. 1.00

00:03:50.000 That'll be a whole other podcast about how they quadrupled the price of education and divided the quality by four, how they destroyed real estate and all of a sudden it takes you your entire life to pay off your house.

00:04:04.000 They just ruined everything in their obsession with multiculturalism at all costs and affirmative action, destroyed meritocracy. 0.98

00:04:12.000 They suck. 1.00

00:04:13.000 And if you want to know 1.00

00:04:16.000 Check out baby boomers who have looked into this, like Paul Begayla. 0.94

00:04:20.000 He did a great article a long time ago called The Worst Generation. 0.97

00:04:24.000 He's like the reigning expert on why baby boomers are terrible. 1.00

00:04:26.000 You don't have to take it from a non-boomer. 0.99

00:04:28.000 Plenty of boomers recognize this.

00:04:30.000 But one of their first terrible inventions was divorce.

00:04:36.000 And my parents are Scottish, they're very generous, like they're into

00:04:40.000 They're into guests.

00:04:42.000 You know, posting is crucial in Scotland.

00:04:45.000 In fact, if you're in Scotland and you're visiting someone, his dad will check on you guys.

00:04:52.000 Even if you're 22.

00:04:54.000 And say, everything all right here?

00:04:55.000 You sure you're having a good time?

00:04:56.000 Right?

00:04:57.000 Now, it's expected, of course, that when these Scottish people come to your country, you'd roll out the red carpet. 1.00

00:05:02.000 So, we always had people staying at my house when I was young because, uh, I don't know, Canadians aren't like that. 1.00

00:05:11.000 They can afford to be a little, uh, a little more warm.

00:05:16.000 Could be the weather.

00:05:18.000 Although it's pretty cold in Scotland too, but so anyway, sorry.

00:05:20.000 So I'd have these guys sitting on my couch, sleeping on my couch for weeks at a time while they got their lives together.

00:05:26.000 This is the days where they wear the short-sleeved dress shirts, have brown striped tie, and brown slacks, and black socks, and low corny loafers.

00:05:36.000 And it kind of, after they'd sleep on your couch, there was a weird smell, a man smell.

00:05:40.000 It's like toothpaste, pee, and beer.

00:05:44.000 We're good to go.

00:05:56.000 Uh, get very depressed, right? 0.59

00:05:59.000 Suicidal.

00:06:00.000 Have a horrible custody battle with the kids.

00:06:04.000 And even when things go cool with the kids, I hear these stories and I'm like, I would blow my head off.

00:06:10.000 You see your son every Wednesday and then every second weekend?

00:06:17.000 That's a cool uncle.

00:06:18.000 Like, I probably see your kid more than that.

00:06:22.000 Your kid comes over to my house for playdates more than you see your own kid.

00:06:26.000 That's horrific, and that weekday sucks, because kids have, you know, little league baseball, and soccer, and whatever, track, and then they have their homework, and then they have dinner.

00:06:36.000 Sometimes you only see them for half an hour.

00:06:38.000 So you waited a whole week for that Wednesday dinner, and it's just like, yeah, hi, whatever.

00:06:43.000 Not that kids are very talkative, by the way, at dinner, especially if you've gone from dad to cool uncle.

00:06:50.000 And that's a great case scenario.

00:06:52.000 Other cases, you don't get to see him at all.

00:06:54.000 Holy Lord.

00:06:55.000 I cannot even imagine that.

00:06:58.000 Everyone seems to talk about how cutting your revenue in half is the rough part.

00:07:03.000 I could not care less about that.

00:07:05.000 Not seeing my kids?

00:07:07.000 I would become a weird dude.

00:07:09.000 I'd be like the Punisher.

00:07:11.000 I'd be like Charles Bronson in Death Wish.

00:07:13.000 I would just wake up at 8 p.m., have a bowl of mac and cheese and a protein shake, do pull-ups, and then assemble my gun for that night's assassinations of bad guys.

00:07:24.000 I'd become a superhero, I guess.

00:07:25.000 That's kind of cool.

00:07:26.000 That's the upside.

00:07:27.000 I'd become Batman.

00:07:28.000 Broke Batman.

00:07:30.000 That's what I would be if I got divorced. 1.00

00:07:33.000 But these guys, who sleep on the couch, they would end up marrying a woman who was just like the one they just left.

00:07:40.000 You know, we hear about these trophy wives, and oh, remember in the movie Husbands and Wives with Woody Allen? 0.99

00:07:45.000 What's her name, Judy Davis? 1.00

00:07:48.000 She goes, um, oh men, they love you till you show your age, and then they want to trade you in for a younger model.

00:07:56.000 I don't, I don't see that.

00:07:58.000 I don't see a lot of these guys with the, you know, the stereotype is they get a convertible and then they start dating some 22-year-old.

00:08:07.000 They can't afford a convertible.

00:08:08.000 They just got divorced.

00:08:10.000 And the 22-year-olds are not interested in old men.

00:08:13.000 Sure, there's, you know, some who screw their professor and stuff, but they don't want to live with him for the rest of their lives.

00:08:18.000 They're just banging a professor because it makes their friends think they're kooky. 0.96

00:08:23.000 So the idea that you're going to end up with some blonde bombshell who's half your age is a myth.

00:08:30.000 And here's the other part of that myth.

00:08:32.000 Women institute divorce 70% of the time. 1.00

00:08:34.000 Now, I often say they're driven to it, but the jury's still out on whose fault it is.

00:08:41.000 Obviously, there's a lot of bias when you look this up, but...

00:08:46.000 I think one thing that could be happening is women's libidos peter out as they get older because that's genetic, right? 0.99

00:08:53.000 God doesn't want you to breed when you're going to have an autistic kid and you're going to be too old to be a good parent. 0.99

00:09:01.000 So he put some checks and balances in there called miscarriages.

00:09:06.000 Um, and so you're lying underneath a guy and you're like, why am I screwing this dude?

00:09:11.000 I don't want to. 0.90

00:09:13.000 Then your dad dies.

00:09:14.000 This is, I'm talking about the woman and it leaves him like a hundred grand or whatever, maybe more, 500, depending if you're middle class.

00:09:22.000 And then she goes, Hey, I'm independently wealthy now.

00:09:25.000 And plus if I divorce him, I get 50%.

00:09:27.000 So I could just be going out for lunch with my gay friends and not having to deal with this dude.

00:09:32.000 And so they institute divorce.

00:09:33.000 Another angle is,

00:09:37.000 Men drive them to it by ignoring them. 1.00

00:09:41.000 And they have their own thing, they have their own routine, they go to the pub, they lose interest.

00:09:44.000 I think porn is a massive part of this kind of divorce, where the husband loses interest. 0.72

00:09:51.000 You know, you gotta work for it.

00:09:53.000 It's not easy to get laid when you're married.

00:09:54.000 It's not like it is when there's no kids around.

00:09:57.000 She's drained from being with the kids all day.

00:09:59.000 You have to seduce her.

00:10:00.000 It's like a date.

00:10:02.000 By the way, great way to seduce your wife. 1.00

00:10:05.000 Bottle of wine.

00:10:07.000 Buy it.

00:10:08.000 Don't do flowers.

00:10:09.000 I'm not a flowers guy.

00:10:10.000 It makes you look like you cheated.

00:10:12.000 You look guilty when you bring home flowers.

00:10:13.000 Hi, honey! 0.99

00:10:14.000 I'm sorry!

00:10:16.000 Get her a nice buzz. 0.94

00:10:17.000 Watch her shows, Real Housewives.

00:10:19.000 And then comment thoughtfully about the show.

00:10:22.000 Now you've been bonding.

00:10:23.000 Now, you know, you're pulling her out of mommy territory and into, like, we're a couple again. 0.71

00:10:28.000 Then you can usually pull it off.

00:10:30.000 If you take it easy.

00:10:31.000 Maybe, you know, would you like a massage?

00:10:32.000 Something like that.

00:10:33.000 Ease your way in. 1.00

00:10:35.000 Of course, you do all that work, and some asshole has growing pains, or a nightmare, and then he comes into the room, or she, and you go, you just look at them and you think, thanks bitch, you just blew my whole date. 1.00

00:10:50.000 And then you go, oh no, you had a bad dream? 1.00

00:10:53.000 Well, okay, it's okay now, why don't you, why don't you go back to your bed and understand that monsters don't exist, this is just a stupid bad dream, I have nightmares every single night. 0.99

00:11:03.000 I wake up at four in the morning with the dars, as the Irish say, the horrors. 1.00

00:11:09.000 And I think it's my liver saying, can you get up and get me some water?

00:11:12.000 I'm just trying to clean this blood here and I'm out.

00:11:15.000 But I don't go crying to my mommy.

00:11:17.000 Anyway.

00:11:21.000 But a lot of, a big part of porn is, I should do a whole episode on porn too. 0.93

00:11:27.000 Big problem with porn is, you're in the doghouse, and you go, fine, good. 1.00

00:11:31.000 I'll go have virtual sex with an infinite number of 8.2s. 1.00

00:11:35.000 So now you can't starve me. 0.99

00:11:37.000 I'm like a dog, in that I need my owner to supply me with food.

00:11:42.000 And I can't generate my own food.

00:11:44.000 I don't use RedTube or YouPorn.

00:11:48.000 So if I'm in the doghouse, then I'm gonna starve to death.

00:11:51.000 It also gives you incentive to stay out of the doghouse. 0.91

00:11:56.000 And by the way, as a side note, I've noticed porn, I've seen it ruining young men's lives.

00:12:01.000 I've always had interns, I've always been around young people, and within the past, say, five to ten years, closer to five, I've noticed these young people go, yeah, I'm a virgin, with no stigma.

00:12:16.000 I was a 17-year-old virgin, and I was the laughingstock of my gang.

00:12:20.000 Like, I was almost beaten for being such a loser, being so late.

00:12:24.000 There was a huge stigma there. 0.57

00:12:25.000 In fact, they ended up setting up a session with this libidinous girl in school who was pretty easy. 0.98

00:12:32.000 And they said, she's at her house right now. 0.99

00:12:33.000 If you don't come over and do this, we're going to kick the crap out of you. 1.00

00:12:37.000 So I was raped, basically, I just realized. 1.00

00:12:39.000 That's how I lost my virginity, to rape. 0.94

00:12:44.000 That's all in my book, by the way, The Death of Cool, which I highly recommend. 0.92

00:12:47.000 Apolitical, very raunchy, and unbelievably hilarious.

00:12:51.000 But these young millennials, they talk about it and they go, yeah, yeah, I'm a virgin.

00:12:55.000 Big whoop.

00:12:57.000 And I go, well, you gotta quit porn, because that'll give you the incentive to get off the couch.

00:13:00.000 You'll come home after a hard day's work, and you'll be tired watching Netflix, and someone will say, hey, there's a party on eucliptus and maple.

00:13:09.000 I don't know why I said that.

00:13:12.000 And you'll go, you know what?

00:13:13.000 I gotta eat.

00:13:15.000 N's gotta eat. 0.64

00:13:18.000 And so you'll go to that party, and you'll do well, too, because you'll be sober.

00:13:23.000 And, by the way,

00:13:25.000 I invented this this we call it no wanks with this comedian Dante Nero and we did it as a dare to see if we could go a month and then after that we go we're actually done for life because we were just smarter singing in the shower more on top of stuff crossing things off our to-do list we were just better human beings and by the way you go well what if my wife's pregnant or whatever no no no you can only 0.84

00:13:51.000 Uh, ejaculate within one yard of your significant other.

00:13:55.000 So if she's pregnant or not in the mood or whatever, you just have to have, and she has to be awake and consensual. 0.97

00:14:00.000 You just have to have some sort of exchange.

00:14:02.000 You can be doing all the work on yourself. 0.99

00:14:05.000 I guess the word is masturbating. 0.99

00:14:06.000 As long as she's there. 0.99

00:14:07.000 So you're establishing a connection.

00:14:09.000 So you're maintaining, uh, a connection.

00:14:14.000 You have connectile dysfunction in your relationship and you need to take Viagra.

00:14:21.000 Uh, and it's definitely helped my marriage.

00:14:24.000 Not beating off.

00:14:25.000 Not doing porn.

00:14:26.000 I kind of invented something experimental you might want to try.

00:14:31.000 It should go down in the marriage history books.

00:14:34.000 I feel like there should be a day of the year for me for inventing this thing.

00:14:38.000 You ready for it?

00:14:40.000 It's called the female doghouse. 1.00

00:14:44.000 What do you think about that?

00:14:45.000 Yeah, no, no, no.

00:14:47.000 I'm not in the doghouse.

00:14:48.000 You're in the doghouse. 0.98

00:14:50.000 Now, obviously, a big part of the doghouse is refusing sexual relations with a lady, with a person, and that's much harder on dudes than it is on chicks. 0.99

00:15:00.000 So, it's sort of like Bobby Sands going on a hunger strike. 0.99

00:15:04.000 The Brits kind of want you to die. 0.98

00:15:06.000 So, refusing sexual relations with a woman, especially when she's getting older, is not exactly the harshest punishment in the world. 0.99

00:15:16.000 So, there's a difference like dog years.

00:15:19.000 Like three, four days, five days of a man being in the doghouse is brutal.

00:15:23.000 That's a life sentence really.

00:15:26.000 To put a woman in the doghouse? 1.00

00:15:28.000 My friend, you're looking at two weeks.

00:15:31.000 So it's a slog.

00:15:32.000 Meanwhile, you're starving to death.

00:15:34.000 So it's, it's very dangerous and you might die, but I've tried it a few times and it, I think it works.

00:15:41.000 I would say it works.

00:15:43.000 I actually stole the idea.

00:15:45.000 From the dude, David Chang, who started Mama Fuku.

00:15:48.000 He was with this supermodel, who was a friend.

00:15:51.000 He's an incredibly wealthy dude, but he's single.

00:15:54.000 Actually, this was a couple years ago.

00:15:56.000 He might be in a relationship now.

00:16:01.000 The vet is calling me about my dog, like I care if he lives or dies.

00:16:05.000 You might as well be calling me about my neighbor's dog.

00:16:12.000 He realizes it's not going anywhere.

00:16:14.000 So he comes up with this concept.

00:16:17.000 He puts her in the friend zone.

00:16:22.000 David Chang, he should be in this book too.

00:16:24.000 The Book of Great Men.

00:16:26.000 There should be a novel of unbelievable relationship moves that men have invented. 1.00

00:16:31.000 I mean, we've got the light bulb and all that stupid electricity stuff. 0.95

00:16:35.000 What about a book for relationships that men have done? 1.00

00:16:38.000 I deserve to be in there for the female dog house. 1.00

00:16:41.000 Not a lot, maybe a chapter.

00:16:43.000 And David Chang deserves a special spot, a special day of the year for, we could do 365.

00:16:49.000 Yeah, that's a good idea.

00:16:50.000 We should make a calendar of it.

00:16:52.000 And David Chang gets one for inventing, putting a chick in the friend zone. 0.83

00:16:57.000 So out of the blue he says to her, you gotta help me find a guy, I almost said.

00:17:01.000 You gotta help me find a date.

00:17:03.000 Do you know any cute girls around? 1.00

00:17:06.000 Obviously she's thinking, uh, I'm one of the most beautiful women in the world.

00:17:10.000 What about me?

00:17:11.000 But the fact that he had just said to her, uh, I'm looking for girls and you're clearly not the one.

00:17:17.000 You're not my cup of tea.

00:17:19.000 All of a sudden it was him not wanting her instead of her not wanting him and he changed the whole power dynamic.

00:17:24.000 I guess I should check up on that and see how it went.

00:17:27.000 But even if it didn't go anywhere and he didn't get her, he still saved the humility of being in the friend zone, being placed in the friend zone.

00:17:39.000 He put the cops in jail instead of the cops putting him in jail.

00:17:42.000 So even if nothing happened from it, he's left with with face, as the Asians say. 0.98

00:17:47.000 And, not to mention, she's gonna feel inspired, because no one's probably ever asked her that before.

00:17:52.000 She's gonna be inspired to say, what about my friend Mandy?

00:17:55.000 She's an ugly 8.1. 1.00

00:17:58.000 She's way lower on the scale than me. 0.96

00:18:00.000 I could do some charity work, and you're like, yeah, 8.1, I'll take it.

00:18:05.000 So, um...

00:18:08.000 Yeah, I really think that porn ruins marriages because it takes the incentive away. 1.00

00:18:14.000 And I think porn is really hard on millennials because it gives them an excuse not to deal. 0.88

00:18:18.000 Especially these days when feminism has made women really annoying. 1.00

00:18:24.000 Millennial women must be a nightmare to deal with. 1.00

00:18:27.000 I see friends show me, uh, what's it called? 0.97

00:18:31.000 Tinder profiles where they're like, if you're mega, get lost.

00:18:34.000 And no one, I'm pansexual and I'm non-cis. 0.95

00:18:38.000 Jesus, dating them must be a nightmare.

00:18:39.000 I've actually heard some stories. 0.99

00:18:41.000 Like a friend of mine told me a story where she goes, this is dating if you're a millennial, this is why they turned to porn. 0.99

00:18:48.000 She goes, uh, can we get some Coke?

00:18:52.000 And he goes, okay, I'm not advocating drug use here.

00:18:54.000 Drugs are very bad, but this is a story a guy told me.

00:18:58.000 And so he gets her some.

00:18:59.000 It's $80 now, apparently.

00:19:01.000 Big vial, which to me, that's like three days worth.

00:19:05.000 I mean, do you want to be up all night?

00:19:07.000 When I didn't do drugs as a young man, it was a $20 bag.

00:19:10.000 Anyway, he gets her some.

00:19:13.000 She goes, okay, I'm going to take her to the bathroom. 1.00

00:19:15.000 This is, the date's barely begun.

00:19:18.000 Uh, I don't think they had anything to eat yet.

00:19:20.000 Maybe they had some apps at the, uh, at the bar.

00:19:24.000 And she comes back and she goes, sorry, I dropped it in the toilet.

00:19:26.000 Oh, well.

00:19:27.000 And he's like, well, you're not really acting like someone who dropped it in the toilet, but okay, and what am I gonna do, search you?

00:19:33.000 Actually, that would have been a trip.

00:19:34.000 What if he searched her and found it?

00:19:36.000 That would have been hilarious.

00:19:37.000 But, uh, he goes, oh, okay.

00:19:39.000 And then they get the bill, and he figures, well, you blew $80 by quote-unquote dropping it in the toilet.

00:19:46.000 I presume you're gonna help with the bill.

00:19:47.000 No help with the bill.

00:19:48.000 They like that part of traditionalism, by the way.

00:19:50.000 The bill-paying thing.

00:19:52.000 That's the only good part of the patriarchy, is buying me free stuff.

00:19:56.000 And then he waits and waits, she doesn't pay the bill, so he pays the bill, and then they're walking home, and, you know, they've had some drinks, and he's doing what all men do on dates, he tries to get invited upstairs, and he goes, let's just go up to your place, just, what, Netflix and chill or whatever the kids today say, and she goes, nah, I don't think so.

00:20:13.000 He goes, we'll just go up for a second, just a little nightcap, just a little, have a shot or whatever.

00:20:16.000 You have any booze?

00:20:18.000 He's like, no, I don't think so.

00:20:19.000 And he goes, oh come on, just, just, we'll go up, look, I'll go up, have one drink and leave.

00:20:22.000 This is all normal behavior, right?

00:20:24.000 This is how you, this is how I met my wife.

00:20:28.000 And she goes, look, I said, no, this is getting creepy and dangerous.

00:20:35.000 Oh, okay.

00:20:35.000 Now it's a me too thing.

00:20:37.000 Now it's a rape that I want to go up to your room. 1.00

00:20:39.000 And so he went home and that was, that's a millennial date.

00:20:44.000 So I throw around a lot of blame for the lack of marriage and the prominence of divorce, but, uh,

00:20:51.000 There's there's culpability on all fronts, you know, I mean and even these single women who I make fun of them I call them spinsters and I say haha you smash the patriarchy when you smash your ovaries at the same time But no one's proposing to these girls either. 0.99

00:21:05.000 These guys are at home masturbating after driven there by feminism.

00:21:08.000 So we're dealing with a hell of a mess Just like the mess I said earlier when I was talking about 0.88

00:21:15.000 When I talk to divorced people about who, so what's going on now?

00:21:18.000 Did I already say that?

00:21:19.000 I'm confused.

00:21:20.000 I was talking earlier, I hope, about when I talk to divorced people about their siblings and that, oh, it's my stepbrother, and no, that's the second marriage.

00:21:27.000 And then I call this, no, that's not my dad.

00:21:30.000 That's my stepdad.

00:21:30.000 I call him Mark.

00:21:31.000 I call my dad, dad.

00:21:33.000 But then after Mark left, I had a new dad.

00:21:35.000 That's Kevin.

00:21:36.000 Oh, okay.

00:21:37.000 So you have 32 stepbrothers, what?

00:21:40.000 It's a tangled web we weave.

00:21:42.000 And if you would just, if you would just wait it out and go through the bad things, you can even do a thing, this might go in the book too, called divorce.

00:21:54.000 Where you mentally divorce your wife.

00:21:56.000 Because I wrote an article about this on Tackymag called Divorce Your Wife, and just like the 10 things I hate about Jews, everyone just takes the title literally and ignores what's below it. 0.91

00:22:06.000 It's kind of, you know, you're tricking people into mocking themselves for being lazy.

00:22:10.000 But no one minds when you say divorce your wife.

00:22:12.000 They should.

00:22:12.000 It's an epidemic that ruins lives, but they're more concerned with Nazis.

00:22:19.000 But your marriage isn't going well.

00:22:21.000 Maybe, you know, you both drink too much.

00:22:24.000 Maybe one of you drinks, the other doesn't.

00:22:26.000 Maybe one of you has too many hobbies.

00:22:28.000 Chuck Zito talks about this in Street Justice.

00:22:30.000 We realized going to the Hell's Angels Club, becoming a biker, ruined his marriage because he wasn't around. 0.71

00:22:38.000 So that's just like a hobby.

00:22:39.000 Because I think it was a... I'm very careful, by the way, talking about Chuck Zito because he will knock you out if you say something bad about him.

00:22:46.000 But I would wager

00:22:48.000 That him being a biker was somewhat of a hobby and a lifestyle.

00:22:54.000 And wherein said habits led to him not paying attention to his kid and his wife.

00:23:00.000 So there's a myriad of reasons.

00:23:03.000 And what people do is, oh well, I'll get divorced and start from scratch.

00:23:07.000 And then you check in on them later and they basically have the same relationship but with a different person and less kids and less fatherhood.

00:23:13.000 That's another disturbing thing too about divorce.

00:23:15.000 Every time you talk to these people or they do a little video,

00:23:18.000 Uh, about it.

00:23:19.000 They always talk about how it's better for them.

00:23:22.000 And, oh, I don't have to go, I can have dinner whenever I want, and I can do this and that, and I get to live free, and I don't have to worry about my- One of them I saw, it said, I don't have to worry about my husband getting the kids all riled up with playtime before bed, and then I have to put them down when they're all hyper.

00:23:36.000 Oh, no.

00:23:38.000 Your- your husband had fun with your kids, and helped bond with them? 1.00

00:23:43.000 What a horrible human being. 0.99

00:23:48.000 Meanwhile, you know, not doing that is child abuse. 0.99

00:23:51.000 Not having a dad to play with at nighttime is child abuse.

00:23:56.000 But they never mention how not having a dad hurts the kids.

00:24:00.000 Like, I talk about Louis C.K.

00:24:01.000 with this, where he brags, basically, about his divorce, and he has that bit where he goes, never say to someone, oh, I'm so sorry, when they say they got divorced.

00:24:12.000 And he says, when you're talking to someone who's divorced, they never got out of a good thing.

00:24:16.000 They never just got out of a fun marriage.

00:24:20.000 Actually, they often do, because they were cheated on.

00:24:22.000 But anyway.

00:24:24.000 And he says, they always got out of a bad thing.

00:24:26.000 So you should be saying, oh, you're divorced?

00:24:28.000 Congratulations.

00:24:30.000 But I go, ever heard of kids?

00:24:32.000 And he's under the impression that he's a great dad, because for three days, they get pure, unfiltered dad.

00:24:39.000 That's half of a dad.

00:24:42.000 Well, what about military guys?

00:24:43.000 They're not around sometimes for the better part of a year.

00:24:46.000 Yeah, but the kids understand that their dad made a huge sacrifice and he would be there if he could.

00:24:51.000 Not his parents got bored of each other and he moved to a neighboring town and the courts won't let him be the co-parent the way he should on a daily basis.

00:25:05.000 I've also talked to divorced people, by the way, and they say that they're kind of like pariahs in their neighborhood because

00:25:12.000 They represent a split marriage.

00:25:14.000 So whether they're male or female, married people don't want them around in case they do that thing also in Husbands and Wives where Judy Davis goes, I like being single.

00:25:24.000 They think you might sell it too well and then I'll lose my marriage.

00:25:27.000 So people avoid them.

00:25:29.000 And they're obviously not there to ruin other marriages.

00:25:31.000 They're just trying to normalize everything, especially for the kids.

00:25:35.000 But they've made themselves into burn victims.

00:25:37.000 Elephant men. 0.85

00:25:39.000 And they have to walk into the local bar, local restaurant and say, I'm not an animal!

00:25:44.000 I'm a human being!

00:25:47.000 Well, you disfigured your family. 0.94

00:25:50.000 So you look weird. 0.84

00:25:52.000 And I'm amazed at how many, you know, rough patches I've been through in my marriage, where I look back and I just think, shank!

00:26:01.000 God! 1.00

00:26:02.000 We didn't throw it all away for some stupid fight. 1.00

00:26:05.000 Thank God! 1.00

00:26:08.000 And the other thing about marriage too is you go through different levels.

00:26:13.000 And you end up looking back over the two-year marriage relationship and they look like a bunch of little kids and you go, you call that a marriage? 1.00

00:26:22.000 What a bunch of losers you are. 0.99

00:26:23.000 Or you look back on when you had one kid and you go, one kid? 1.00

00:26:27.000 Yeah, nice family, nerd.

00:26:30.000 And I keep looking back at my previous marriage.

00:26:33.000 As kid stuff.

00:26:34.000 I'm at the point now where I love her bones.

00:26:37.000 So she could become a burn victim or paralyzed, but I just love the core of her. 0.99

00:26:44.000 I know that sounds super gay. 0.95

00:26:45.000 And by the way, people who aren't in marriages, you wonder why all we do is complain about our significant others when we're at the barbecue? 0.95

00:26:52.000 It's because this stuff is nauseating for me to talk to you about how if my wife were to shave her head or grow her hair long, I don't really care. 0.54

00:27:00.000 I'm into the actual skeleton.

00:27:04.000 But anyway, back to that thing about divorce.

00:27:06.000 So you can divorce your wife. 0.94

00:27:07.000 So you go, uh, we're drinking too much or I have too much of a hobby, blah, blah, blah.

00:27:11.000 And so you break up with her mentally in your mind.

00:27:13.000 Boom, we're done.

00:27:15.000 Now you're looking for someone who is your type, attractive wise, who gets along with your kids, who, you know, it wouldn't break the bank, uh, to, to be with her.

00:27:26.000 Um, and, uh, you could not have to move.

00:27:30.000 I know.

00:27:30.000 How about your wife?

00:27:33.000 So divorce your wife in your head, then recourt your wife and start a new life with your wife. 1.00

00:27:41.000 You don't even have to tell her that you divorced her.

00:27:44.000 You just are courting this lady who has the same name as your wife and the same head.

00:27:48.000 And you recourt her and start your marriage again.

00:27:53.000 Totally silently, if you want.

00:27:55.000 They don't have to hear about it.

00:27:57.000 I really don't recommend couples therapy, by the way.

00:27:59.000 I've never been, I never would ever go, and everyone I talk to, it's just like the final, it's the death knell before divorce.

00:28:08.000 They go in there, they get too honest, they complain, they say things that they can't take back, deep-seated things about, I don't know, lusting someone else or something I really don't like about you to your core, and then the couple can't get over it.

00:28:21.000 I heard this one guy told me he went to couple therapy and she said, okay, first question I always ask a couple, um, what do you guys do when you have free time?

00:28:30.000 When the parents have the kids, you're on vacation or something, do you have sex? 0.86

00:28:34.000 And they go, yes, like we're like rabbits. 0.73

00:28:36.000 And she goes, okay, good.

00:28:37.000 Well, we can start fixing this.

00:28:39.000 And then he says, wait a minute, what would you have said if I said we don't have sex?

00:28:43.000 And she goes, well, we would start a dismantling plan, you know, to get you out of this.

00:28:49.000 He just thought that was funny?

00:28:50.000 I think that is depraved.

00:28:53.000 I think a lot of these couples therapists are saboteurs who have had their own terrible relationships, their own divorces, and they want to subject everyone else to it. 0.88

00:29:03.000 Misery loves company, and I think they're evil.

00:29:05.000 And I know of concrete examples of this, where a guy was going out with a girl, they were doing great, he was about to propose, she went to a therapist or whatever, and they do that whole, you don't need him,

00:29:17.000 That's the thing, that's what I wanted to get to.

00:29:21.000 With the general attitude here, especially with women, even with professional women, who are in therapy or whatever, and running these sessions, their attitude is, you don't need that, girl! 0.99

00:29:32.000 And maybe it's a chick thing, where you want to encourage your fellow woman, and they just go, girl, you don't need that, get out of there! 1.00

00:29:38.000 You don't need him.

00:29:39.000 You're a woman.

00:29:39.000 Here you roar.

00:29:40.000 Don't work on it.

00:29:41.000 You're not a slave.

00:29:43.000 What are you? 1.00

00:29:43.000 You're going to be his bitch? 1.00

00:29:45.000 You're going to be in the kitchen making him a sandwich? 1.00

00:29:47.000 Screw that.

00:29:48.000 You could be the President of the United States. 1.00

00:29:51.000 So tell him to fuck off. 1.00

00:29:54.000 And they ruin relationships. 1.00

00:29:57.000 And by the way, that other case I'm telling you about, he did propose and she said, no, I gotta get out of this relationship.

00:30:02.000 He was smoking too much pot.

00:30:04.000 Now, he stopped smoking pot and got in shape, and then she said, God, I wish he'd done that when I was around, and then she was crying, and why didn't you fight for me?

00:30:13.000 I hear that all the time.

00:30:14.000 Another guy, Mexican couple.

00:30:16.000 He's a professor, art school, down there.

00:30:20.000 She gets married young.

00:30:21.000 She's like 22.

00:30:21.000 He's 32.

00:30:23.000 They break up a few years into the marriage.

00:30:27.000 She says she's too young.

00:30:28.000 He goes, okay.

00:30:30.000 Marriage is over.

00:30:31.000 He sees her at a party a few years later.

00:30:32.000 She's bawling her eyes out.

00:30:34.000 Why didn't you fight for me?

00:30:36.000 In the bathroom, crying her mascara off.

00:30:39.000 And she's right, by the way.

00:30:40.000 Another guy I know proposed.

00:30:42.000 She was in her mid-twenties.

00:30:44.000 She thought she was too young, said no.

00:30:47.000 They got on with their lives.

00:30:49.000 Five years later, she sees him.

00:30:52.000 I'm so sorry, I don't know what I was thinking.

00:30:53.000 I thought I was too young. 0.97

00:30:55.000 By the way, when you say I'm too young to get married, aren't you saying I need more cocks? 1.00

00:30:59.000 There's not a lot of variety of penises, by the way. 0.99

00:31:02.000 I've been to many gyms. 0.98

00:31:04.000 I've had many male friends.

00:31:05.000 I'm not shy about nudity.

00:31:07.000 Most of us aren't. 0.98

00:31:08.000 If we're going, you know, camping or fishing or going on a trip, our dicks are everywhere. 0.95

00:31:13.000 And they all look pretty much the same. 0.90

00:31:15.000 Some are bigger than others.

00:31:16.000 Mine is obviously much larger than most, but it's still not, you know, a circus freak size. 0.99

00:31:21.000 And I bet vaginas are similar. 1.00

00:31:23.000 You know, that whole wiener down the hallway thing is bull BS. 0.99

00:31:26.000 We all have pretty much 0.99

00:31:28.000 Similar genitalia. 0.75

00:31:29.000 I'm sure pornography gives you crazy ideas about things, but for the most part, we're all in the same kind of average range. 0.80

00:31:34.000 So the idea that you need a whole bunch of variety... What?

00:31:37.000 It's not food.

00:31:38.000 It's a dink. 1.00

00:31:40.000 Says the guy who hates blowjobs. 1.00

00:31:43.000 Just kidding. 0.99

00:31:45.000 Um, so, yeah, in all these cases, this flippant attitude shatters lives and shatters families and takes parents away from their kids.

00:31:56.000 These people should be arrested. 0.99

00:31:57.000 And that, that couple therapist I was telling you about, I'll just finish the story now, she goes, he says, well, what if I had said we don't, we don't fuck like rabbits when we're on vacation. 0.99

00:32:05.000 And she said, yeah, we'd start dismantling it. 0.94

00:32:07.000 And I thought, wait a minute, that's like, you're going to your local priest. 0.99

00:32:12.000 And you say, hey, I've been having these thoughts about atheism and how frivolous it all is and this stupid Santa Claus in the sky who made the world and... 0.99

00:32:21.000 Well, we were, but our pets go to heaven. 0.99

00:32:23.000 I just, I'm having, I'm having trouble with my faith.

00:32:27.000 And that's like a priest saying, oh, well, well, if it's not working out for you, we should start coming up with a plan to dismantle this, to end this.

00:32:34.000 That's not your job as a priest.

00:32:36.000 You want to maintain the religion, to maintain the tradition, maintain the faith.

00:32:40.000 These couple therapists, that should be their same thing.

00:32:43.000 We're here to fix your relationship, not help you dismantle it.

00:32:48.000 That's the danger of that kind of stuff.

00:32:50.000 Don't listen to them. 0.99

00:32:52.000 They are bitter chicks. 0.99

00:32:57.000 They're angry women who want revenge on the world. 1.00

00:33:00.000 Because that's the irony of all this empowerment and feminism, is it ends up punishing women more than men. 1.00

00:33:05.000 Even the whole don't get married, you're still sexy, you don't need a ring on it.

00:33:10.000 That ends up with these lonely spinsters. 1.00

00:33:12.000 Guys, we can always get laid.

00:33:14.000 You know, the 22-year-olds don't want to marry us, but there's always stuff hanging around.

00:33:18.000 I have a friend who's about

00:33:20.000 And he shows me his dating app.

00:33:20.000 50.

00:33:22.000 And he doesn't want little kids.

00:33:25.000 He'll go like 40 to 50, I think, is his range.

00:33:29.000 And sometimes he'll actually let me choose them on the app.

00:33:32.000 And I'm looking at these and I'm going, very reasonable.

00:33:34.000 Yes, please.

00:33:35.000 Fantastic.

00:33:36.000 Great.

00:33:36.000 Yep.

00:33:37.000 Yep-er-doodle.

00:33:39.000 You don't want me running your dating app because I just keep going, yes, yes, yes, yes, sure, sure, yep, yep, yep, yep-er-doodle, yep, yep, yep.

00:33:46.000 Yes to everyone.

00:33:47.000 I'm very picky.

00:33:49.000 I was when I chose my wife, but otherwise I'm not very picky.

00:33:53.000 So yeah, the moral of the story here is that family is about a lot more than you.

00:33:59.000 And Naomi Schaefer Riley writes about this, where she says a big problem with marriage these days is they think they need their soulmate.

00:34:06.000 She has to like the same team as you, and you guys sit up in bed and gossip, and you call her three times a day.

00:34:13.000 Honey, I just saw the biggest eagle I've ever seen in my life.

00:34:16.000 It might have been a bald eagle.

00:34:19.000 That's not what a marriage is.

00:34:21.000 A marriage is a perpetual first date.

00:34:23.000 You're always doing your best. 1.00

00:34:24.000 Every time you fart around your wife, a blowjob loses its wings. 1.00

00:34:28.000 You shouldn't even share the same bathroom, if you can. 1.00

00:34:30.000 If you can get away from that.

00:34:31.000 You always want to be presentable.

00:34:33.000 Don't wear sweatpants and Lululemons every day.

00:34:36.000 Brush your hair.

00:34:37.000 Shave your... You always want to, you know, keep her interested.

00:34:41.000 And she should want to do the same for you.

00:34:42.000 Ladies, don't cut your hair short. 1.00

00:34:44.000 You look like a weird boy.

00:34:49.000 And when you do that, when you get a family, you present a scenario to your children that says, love exists.

00:34:55.000 I love you.

00:34:56.000 We're not selfish.

00:34:57.000 We're here for the long haul.

00:34:58.000 You teach them about commitment, all kinds of things, even outside of love, about how important family is.

00:35:04.000 And that's what a community is.

00:35:05.000 And the community is what a society is.

00:35:07.000 And a society is what a culture is.

00:35:09.000 So when you get divorced, you're shattering Western culture.

00:35:13.000 And much more importantly, you're shattering those children's lives.

00:35:17.000 And 1.00

00:35:19.000 Ladies, if your husband dies or he's a piece of shit, he walks out of the family or he cheats on you, you have a moral obligation to get remarried. 1.00

00:35:29.000 I know a lot of couples and people who they, there's some sort of catastrophe or some horrible thing happened, especially with, with boomers who weren't that used to divorce and they were single and they just raised the family as a single mom. 1.00

00:35:42.000 That's not cool.

00:35:45.000 You gotta get shacked up.

00:35:46.000 Mary Catherine Ham.

00:35:47.000 She lost her husband in a horrible bicycling accident.

00:35:50.000 He was bicycling for charity.

00:35:52.000 She's gotta find a man. 1.00

00:35:53.000 You gotta get moving.

00:35:55.000 Everyone was criticizing Patton Oswalt because he got married so quickly after his wife passed.

00:36:00.000 Nope.

00:36:01.000 He's doing the right thing.

00:36:02.000 His daughter needs a mommy.

00:36:04.000 And this is very sad, but soon that mommy will be her mommy and she won't even remember the first mommy.

00:36:11.000 That's an unfortunate thing, but dying is dying.

00:36:13.000 You gotta move on.

00:36:16.000 And...

00:36:18.000 The more you stay married, there's really two trajectories here, right?

00:36:21.000 There's the family aspect with the kids, and that's just, I can't emphasize how crucial that is.

00:36:26.000 And you're kidding yourself if you think co-parenting is totally awesome.

00:36:29.000 No, it's not.

00:36:30.000 It's 50% parenting.

00:36:32.000 You've now divided your parenting in half.

00:36:35.000 So that should be pretty simple.

00:36:36.000 But then the relationship part, marriage has really got a bad rap.

00:36:41.000 We're really lazy about commitment.

00:36:42.000 We're so quick to throw it in the toilet.

00:36:44.000 I mean, our parents threw it in the toilet, so why not?

00:36:47.000 But I can't explain to you how much it evolves and how better it gets.

00:36:53.000 It's like learning a language.

00:36:55.000 You know, first you can just say, hello, I would like sandwich today.

00:37:01.000 Then you can start understanding conversations.

00:37:04.000 The next level, you can start hearing songs and getting the song lyrics.

00:37:09.000 The next one is you watch TV.

00:37:12.000 I don't know.

00:37:25.000 And I feel that way about marriage.

00:37:28.000 They say, oh, it's the same hamburger every day for dinner, same cheeseburger.

00:37:32.000 No.

00:37:33.000 Tom Shalhoub and I talk about this all the time.

00:37:36.000 It's the same kitchen every night.

00:37:38.000 So you walk into the same kitchen and you scratch your beard and you go,

00:37:43.000 What about kind of a fresh pasta?

00:37:46.000 Maybe with just a, not pesto, but just a splash of basil?

00:37:51.000 Maybe we should try that.

00:37:53.000 Or you know what?

00:37:53.000 Let's just have appetizers tonight.

00:37:55.000 No main course.

00:37:57.000 Just mozzarella cheese sticks.

00:37:59.000 What about just a salad?

00:38:01.000 That would be the equivalent of just spooning, I guess.

00:38:04.000 But you can do all these different things and don't give up.

00:38:07.000 And when I see these people who got divorced, they don't go, wow, I'm so glad that's over.

00:38:14.000 They go, I guess we could have worked it out.

00:38:16.000 There's another problem here too, especially with women, where human beings can sort of erase the past because otherwise you're living a life of regret. 1.00

00:38:24.000 So when you look this up online, all the articles are like, I love being a single mom and divorce totally rocks.

00:38:31.000 And I love having cancer.

00:38:32.000 It's cool being bald. 0.99

00:38:34.000 So it's hard to get a straight answer out of people, but I can see, I see in kids, I see in the children of divorce who are in their forties, many of them, I just see regret and a huge mess, a huge pile of shit they made for themselves. 0.99

00:38:49.000 And they did it out of laziness. 0.99

00:38:52.000 They did it out of self-indulgence.

00:38:54.000 They did it out of a lack of, you know, a big picture understanding of what's important in life.

00:38:59.000 And that's a really sad part of Western society because

00:39:03.000 The family is really the backbone of everything.

00:39:08.000 And it's the backbone of you and your happiness.

00:39:11.000 It's your backbone.

00:39:13.000 I don't mind going out with the guys having a beer.

00:39:17.000 It's real.

00:39:18.000 It's fun.

00:39:18.000 But it's not real fun.

00:39:20.000 But when you're with your family, it's another level of joy.

00:39:25.000 Like last night, we rented the movie, we didn't rent, we own the movie Breaking.

00:39:29.000 It's a breakdancing movie from 1983.

00:39:31.000 And we both, my wife and I both knew what was going to happen, especially with Johnny, our five-year-old.

00:39:36.000 The kids were going to watch all this cool breakdancing from the 80s and think they can do it.

00:39:40.000 And now my older kids have a sense of humor about it.

00:39:42.000 They know they're not immediately ready to be in a breakdancing competition, but five-year-olds, they've got an incredible hubris.

00:39:50.000 They really, I think it might be bravery and low IQ might be linked somehow.

00:39:56.000 Because

00:39:58.000 He instantly got it in his head that he could breakdance after seeing the movie.

00:40:03.000 In fact, even before the movie was over, he was standing up doing the robot and doing, you know, the crab and head spinning and stuff.

00:40:10.000 And it was obviously terrible.

00:40:12.000 He's five.

00:40:13.000 But his deadpan... Like I almost...

00:40:16.000 I almost bit my lip to shreds trying not to laugh and I recorded this on my phone.

00:40:21.000 So I'm watching him do the terrible robot and sort of pop and lock and do all these other 80s breakdancing movies.

00:40:28.000 You can't smile.

00:40:29.000 That's the thing about cute toddlers. 1.00

00:40:32.000 They want to be known as cool and tough and no one laughs at the fawns, right?

00:40:37.000 So you have to bite your inner lip while you film them.

00:40:39.000 Even

00:40:40.000 Filming them is often a challenge because they stop when they see the cameras out because they feel like they're being exploited But um, oh my god those Terrible dance moves he was doing with his catatonic Dead robot face because it was so intense like worth so we have to sit there going.

00:40:57.000 Oh my god.

00:40:58.000 That's amazing And like these movies I made I want to send them to to the Smithsonian like I want them encased in gold I I never these are so valuable to me.

00:41:09.000 I

00:41:10.000 So valuable.

00:41:10.000 I've already watched it 32 times on my phone.

00:41:14.000 And I could watch that another 300 million times.

00:41:18.000 So that's a level.

00:41:19.000 And Lauren Southern talks about how, you know, they say that couples are less happy after they have kids.

00:41:25.000 No, their scope of happiness changes.

00:41:28.000 So they go from, you know, a fart joke to seeing a child take their first steps.

00:41:33.000 Your whole spectrum of what joy is changes.

00:41:39.000 And your sort of self-responsibility. 0.99

00:41:41.000 I mean, shit, when you don't have kids, you're proud of yourself if you walk the dog that day. 0.99

00:41:45.000 When you have kids, you're only proud of yourself if your son gets, you know, in a great baseball team and you build him a go-kart the same day. 1.00

00:41:53.000 You have higher standards.

00:41:56.000 And that's a good way to be.

00:41:59.000 Anyway, I hope I've helped young men want to get off the couch and get laid in this episode, because that's good. 0.99

00:42:08.000 And by the way, you can sow your wild oats.

00:42:09.000 God seems to want us to start breeding at 14.

00:42:12.000 He made women menstruate remarkably young, and Puerto Ricans seem to take him at his word. 0.99

00:42:17.000 That seems a bit rich to me.

00:42:21.000 It's probably ideal, actually, marrying young and having kids young, but... and not 14.

00:42:24.000 But, uh, you know, sow your wild oats from 15 to 25 if you want.

00:42:29.000 That's still a decade of cocaine and pot and STDs.

00:42:34.000 Surely at 25 you get the picture.

00:42:37.000 I mean, the last two times you had sex, you were dancing to the music that was playing in that room more than you were actually in the moment.

00:42:45.000 That's usually a sign that you've sowed your wild oats.

00:42:48.000 So get a ring on it and start the next chapter.

00:42:50.000 That's really what my book was about, The Death of Kool.

00:42:53.000 Kool is a phase that dies and then post 25 you have get married and have kids.

00:42:58.000 I waited too long.

00:43:00.000 So that's one thing I want to say to young people.

00:43:02.000 To women I want to say get a ring on it. 1.00

00:43:04.000 Stop giving the milk away for free.

00:43:06.000 No one's going to want to buy the cow.

00:43:07.000 And if you fall for this Jezebel feminism about you're still hot at 50, you're going to end up alone.

00:43:14.000 You're going to end up being a colostomy bag for strangers come.

00:43:18.000 And that's no way to live your life.

00:43:20.000 So, sure.

00:43:21.000 Sow your wild oats too, ladies. 1.00

00:43:23.000 I'm not going to fault you for that.

00:43:25.000 But eventually, at 25, you're going to stop dating comedians and musicians and start looking at someone who has a good relationship with their mother.

00:43:31.000 Not too good.

00:43:32.000 You don't want him calling her every day.

00:43:33.000 But someone who is ambitious. 0.71

00:43:36.000 You want a man, he can have a dumb career like being a DJ, but if he has to get up at 9am on a Monday and be working on it for him to be the father of your children.

00:43:45.000 And then thirdly, as far as married people go, don't throw out the baby with the bathwater. 0.98

00:43:51.000 Don't even throw out the bathwater.

00:43:53.000 Don't throw any of it away.

00:43:55.000 If there's a problem, reboot.

00:43:58.000 There's always a way around it.

00:44:00.000 Sleep on the couch for five days. 0.99

00:44:02.000 Don't masturbate alone. 0.98

00:44:03.000 That's crucial. 0.99

00:44:05.000 But ride it out.

00:44:08.000 You're going to be together for 40 years.

00:44:10.000 You can have a bad entire year.

00:44:12.000 That's a very extreme scenario, but it's still within the parameters of reasonable.

00:44:18.000 And we're getting people who divorce because they have a bad month.

00:44:20.000 I can't talk to people.

00:44:22.000 Who have a kid that's under two or three and they're divorced.

00:44:25.000 I just think, what, you couldn't last two years? 0.98

00:44:28.000 No, she's insane. 1.00

00:44:29.000 All right, why'd you have a baby with her then, Louis C.K.? ? 0.77

00:44:35.000 But I can only... I'm not Mao.

00:44:37.000 You know?

00:44:38.000 My dictums are not policy.

00:44:40.000 They're just pontification. 0.65

00:44:42.000 I'm just trying to help.

00:44:44.000 And firing Kevin Williamson from National Review because he came up with an extreme idea is lunacy.

00:44:50.000 We're just ideas men here.

00:44:52.000 We're sitting in the cave like Plato.

00:44:54.000 Blurting out concepts, hoping to improve society.

00:44:57.000 And that, by the way, is what's great about CRTV.com.

00:45:02.000 You can go there now, use the promo code GAVIN.

00:45:04.000 You can also get a month for free.

00:45:07.000 I'm on Monday to Thursday, every night at 830.

00:45:11.000 I'm also starting a new show with them called CRTV Tonight, which is a live talk show where we have guests, we come out, we

00:45:19.000 We play games, we talk about the news, we look at viral videos.

00:45:22.000 I have a little serious segment in the middle where I interview someone heavy about something heavy.

00:45:29.000 That's just the meat.

00:45:31.000 The rest is delicious snacks.

00:45:34.000 And the rest of CRTV is really all you need.

00:45:38.000 There's such an incredible range from Phil Robertson and his wise old, he's so soothing watching that guy.

00:45:45.000 And then Steven Crowder is like me without the filth.

00:45:49.000 Roaming millennials and intellectual.

00:45:51.000 I don't know, the whole network I feel like, I don't know how anyone else could get through it all and still need more.

00:45:58.000 Maybe you could watch Tucker Carlson.

00:46:00.000 Maybe you could listen to the A&A Show on Compound.

00:46:04.000 Maybe you could subscribe to Rebel.

00:46:07.000 All of those are worthy adversaries, worthy competition.

00:46:12.000 But there's so much amazing stuff out there.

00:46:14.000 It really shows you how extinct the dinosaur media is.

00:46:19.000 But anyway, crtv.com slash Gavin, promo code Gavin, and I will see you on Friday.

Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - April 10, 2018

Get Off My Lawn Podcast #40 | Marriage is Easy

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