Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - July 03, 2018


Get Off My Lawn Podcast #63 | You just got knocked the f**k out!


Episode Stats

Length

55 minutes

Words per Minute

170.34546

Word Count

9,369

Sentence Count

758

Misogynist Sentences

71

Hate Speech Sentences

60


Summary

This episode is a mashup of a few of my favorite bits from the past few weeks. I talk about a bunch of crazy things that have been going on in the world, and then dive into a crazy theory that s been floating around the internet for a while now. I think it s a good one, and I hope you enjoy it. Tweet me if you like it! Timestamps: 0:00:00 - Why is it so hard for women to have it all? 3:30 - What does it take to be a good parent? 4:00 - Is it better to have a job and be a great mom than a good wife? 5:15 - How many kids should a mom have? 6:40 - Is there a limit to how many kids you can have at once? 7:20 - How much money should a woman be allowed to earn? 8:00- Is it possible for a woman to have more than one job? 9:30- How to be good at one thing? 10:15- What is a good dad? 11:40- Should a woman have more kids? 12:20- Should you be loyal to her husband? 13:30 14:15 15:40 16:00 Is it ever okay to cheat on a woman who s not a good mom? 17: Is it okay to have sex? 18:15: What are you only loyal to a guy who sipping from a woman? 19:00 Can you be a girl who s only good at sex with a guy? 21: Is she a good guy if she s a bad girl? 22:00 Do you have a guy you like a girl that s only just because she s not good at it? 23:20 25:30 Can a guy be loyal? 26:30 Is a girl be loyal when you re a good friend? 27:30 Are you a good girl if you don t want to suck a guy that s a girl s ass? 28:00 Are you in love with someone who s good enough to suck your cock? 29:30 Do you want to get a threesome? 30:00 What is the worst thing you ve ever had sex with someone else s butt? 31:00 Should you have sex with another guy s ass in a park?


Transcript

00:00:00.000 You just got knocked the fuck out!
00:00:05.000 That's a song by some band from Long Island who sings like Rage Against the Machine and dances around with rap gestures and talks about Nazis!
00:00:19.000 Nazis!
00:00:20.000 They're everywhere now.
00:00:21.000 You have to watch out.
00:00:22.000 You know, a lot of the stuff I'm seeing right now is reminiscent of Germany in the 30s!
00:00:32.000 What a crazy theory, huh?
00:00:35.000 Here's another crazy theory that people just accept as reasonable.
00:00:38.000 You got to see it to be it.
00:00:41.000 So they got a new Barbie doll who's black and she's like a biochemist, technician, welder, genius who makes atoms from scratch.
00:00:51.000 Uh, wearing her big chemistry glasses.
00:00:54.000 That's great, man.
00:00:55.000 No one has a problem with that.
00:00:57.000 And if someone, if some black girl's a nerd, she'd probably like that a lot better than the Barbie one.
00:01:01.000 But the free market will handle that.
00:01:03.000 But the subtext isn't that simple.
00:01:04.000 The subtext isn't, let's have someone who's paraplegic with red hair have a doll that's like her.
00:01:12.000 The subtext is much bigger than that.
00:01:14.000 It's, you have to see it to be, and I've talked to intelligent feminists.
00:01:18.000 I know that sounds crazy.
00:01:19.000 Like The Pie Life, the author of The Pie Life, who, this book, The Pie Life, she talks about how women can have it all.
00:01:26.000 They can have a job and be great moms.
00:01:28.000 The secret is,
00:01:29.000 And we debated this on my old show TJMS for honestly like two hours.
00:01:34.000 And we finally came down to the crux of our disagreement.
00:01:38.000 Her contention is that being a totally awesome mom for one day a week is better than being an okay sort of mom for seven days a week.
00:01:49.000 Which is just false.
00:01:51.000 It's sort of like these divorced dads who go, I'm actually, I'm a better dad now that I'm divorced and I only see the kids on Wednesday night and every second weekend.
00:01:59.000 Cause I, they really get all of me.
00:02:02.000 No.
00:02:03.000 A big part of being a parent is being mediocre.
00:02:06.000 A big part of being a parent is just being there.
00:02:09.000 So when your son or your daughter has something crazy to say, like, I was bullied and I'm feeling suicidal or, or, uh, you know, I like this boy.
00:02:18.000 I'm 14 now.
00:02:19.000 Should I go on a date?
00:02:20.000 Blah, blah, blah.
00:02:21.000 I stabbed someone in the park.
00:02:24.000 I don't know, something over the top.
00:02:26.000 You happen to be there and you're sitting there with your face behind the paper, but you're there.
00:02:32.000 You know, my grandmother was telling me she never spoke to her dad.
00:02:35.000 But he was always there.
00:02:36.000 He was just behind a newspaper.
00:02:37.000 That's kinda better than the divorce dad who's totally ready to rock!
00:02:42.000 Oh my god, my brother told me this insane story.
00:02:45.000 I'll get back to that, uh, see it to be it thing in a sec, but my brother told me about this dude.
00:02:53.000 God, it's so embarrassing.
00:02:55.000 You know that movie Election with Matthew Broderick?
00:02:57.000 Where the teacher gets caught having sex with his student and they call him on it and he starts crying and he goes, we're in love!
00:03:06.000 This is like that, but true.
00:03:07.000 So he's the son of a professor.
00:03:10.000 No, he's a professor.
00:03:11.000 Son of a professor.
00:03:12.000 That's how I heard the story.
00:03:15.000 And this guy starts fucking his student, as all professors are wont to do, because men are only as loyal as their opportunities, and if hordes and hordes of 21-year-olds hit on you, eventually you're gonna snap.
00:03:27.000 See, that's the thing about infidelity, too.
00:03:29.000 Johnny Knoxville cheated on his wife.
00:03:32.000 What the hell was he supposed to do?
00:03:34.000 There was a lineup of chicks begging to suck his cock.
00:03:38.000 You're only human!
00:03:40.000 I mean, I like to sit on my high horse about infidelity, but they're not exactly kicking down the front door.
00:03:45.000 You know, when I put a ring on this, there was not a lot of- there was a dry eye in the house, believe it or not.
00:03:51.000 They were not- a woman were not banging on the stained glass like the- like the graduate going, No!
00:03:59.000 I want him too!
00:04:01.000 I was, my stock was going down.
00:04:03.000 I was selling Bitcoin post-collapse.
00:04:07.000 And my wife bought cheap.
00:04:09.000 I sold semi-high.
00:04:15.000 But anyway, yeah, I think professors are disgusting human beings.
00:04:19.000 I think teachers tend to be left-wing lunatics who have brainwashed themselves into brainwashing other people.
00:04:26.000 But, just to play devil's advocate,
00:04:29.000 It can't be easy to be loyal when you're surrounded with horny ladies.
00:04:34.000 And celebrities go through this.
00:04:37.000 Plus with celebrities, with actors, you're sitting in a little trailer.
00:04:41.000 You act, you know, you have to be there for 12 hours.
00:04:45.000 You got there at 5 in the morning, you know, to get the sunlight.
00:04:48.000 And you probably act for an hour of those 12 hours.
00:04:51.000 The rest is just farting around.
00:04:53.000 And you can't do anything intense like start writing a book, because the second you get into the zone, you're pulled out and you have to go grab a pencil and throw it.
00:05:04.000 And they just need that with the lighting to get that right.
00:05:07.000 And then you go back to your trailer.
00:05:09.000 And so all these guys end up doing is sort of sifting through People magazine, reading the one paragraph stories.
00:05:17.000 So, you're bored out of your mind, you're gorgeous, if you're in Hollywood, right?
00:05:23.000 And you're with other gorgeous people, and gorgeous people tend to be dumb, because they don't have to ever try or get into stuff.
00:05:28.000 So you're dumb, gorgeous, and bored, and lots of people want to blow you.
00:05:32.000 So you're either going to screw the other female in the movie, or one of these equally bored production assistants, who also want to become actresses, so they want a one-upmanship.
00:05:43.000 That's another thing we don't talk about with the Me Too, is how many women use their sex as currency on purpose.
00:05:48.000 One time I was with
00:05:49.000 Shane Smith from Vice days and we were at a hotel and this girl can't buck some young lass and she said Hi, what are you guys doing?
00:05:59.000 Like we're sitting by the pool.
00:06:00.000 We had meetings all day today.
00:06:01.000 It's over and she goes.
00:06:03.000 Oh, I
00:06:06.000 So what do you guys do?
00:06:08.000 And I said that we're superheroes.
00:06:10.000 I said that we're involved in crime fighting.
00:06:12.000 And I don't mean civilians who dress up as superheroes.
00:06:15.000 I mean we're actual, real life guys with magical powers.
00:06:19.000 But we're human.
00:06:20.000 Also partly.
00:06:22.000 And it was a dumb joke, but I just basically said we were taking some time out from crime fighting.
00:06:26.000 I didn't understand what she was doing, and I realized in retrospect, she was offering herself to us.
00:06:32.000 All we had to say was we're producers, and she would have taken us up there and let us do whatever we want to her.
00:06:38.000 That's fucked up.
00:06:40.000 That's sub-prostitute.
00:06:42.000 At least prostitutes get guaranteed money.
00:06:45.000 Or someone goes up and beats up the guy.
00:06:47.000 She, I'm guessing, was gonna do it for nothing.
00:06:51.000 Anyway, I'm off at a hundred tangents here, but... So this professor dude...
00:06:59.000 Fucks a student.
00:07:00.000 And now, if I was a professor, and I was boning students, first of all, you're going to hell.
00:07:04.000 But secondly, I'd go, well, this can't last.
00:07:08.000 This is horrible.
00:07:09.000 But I guess I'm gonna- It's like shoplifting.
00:07:12.000 Like, this can't be a habit.
00:07:13.000 This can't go anywhere.
00:07:14.000 But I am gonna take this one little piece of chapstick and run away.
00:07:19.000 But he doesn't do that.
00:07:20.000 He falls in love with her.
00:07:24.000 Oy vey.
00:07:26.000 So the mom finds out, and I guess, I'm not privy to this, but I guess when you have kids that are in their 20s and your husband cheats on you, you don't break glasses the way like a Latina 20-year-old would.
00:07:40.000 You just can take it in stride.
00:07:42.000 Believe me, I won't be taking it in stride if it comes across my desk.
00:07:46.000 But I guess these older ladies, you know, they go, look, here's the deal.
00:07:52.000 Now we're talking about probably like 58 year olds.
00:07:56.000 Here's the deal.
00:07:57.000 Our kids are in school now in college.
00:08:01.000 Call it off now, and never speak to her again, and we will work it out.
00:08:08.000 It's obviously not gonna be a great week, but we'll eventually learn to piece it together.
00:08:11.000 You know, when I met you, you weren't a virgin, I can handle that, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
00:08:14.000 I made some mistakes too, maybe, she said.
00:08:18.000 Or, you can stay with her, and I am going to fucking destroy you.
00:08:26.000 Obviously, right?
00:08:27.000 She's got a hell of a case in divorce court.
00:08:31.000 And he goes, I'm sorry Muriel, we're in love.
00:08:35.000 Okay, buddy.
00:08:37.000 It's like, it's like the opening to this show, you got knocked the fuck out.
00:08:42.000 These little Antifa kids keep picking fights with these enormous war vet bodybuilding patriots and go, what now, bitch?
00:08:50.000 What you gonna do, bitch?
00:08:52.000 Like, I have always known my place as far as conflict goes, and I don't pick fight with the pagans.
00:08:59.000 I don't pick fights with MS-13.
00:09:02.000 I don't disparage Bloods and Crips.
00:09:04.000 I don't tell, I don't say anything bad about the Mongols, and I'm not even going to use a hypothetical example of that because I would hate it to be taken out of context.
00:09:11.000 I don't call Chuck Zito anything negative, and I'm not, again, not going to give you an example.
00:09:19.000 Chuck Zito once knocked a guy out, that gossip columnist whose name I forget, because the gossip columnist was being featured in New York Magazine and he talked about snitches and then in the next paragraph Chuck Zito's name was mentioned.
00:09:35.000 So Chuck Zito's name was too close to the word snitch.
00:09:39.000 So we invited him to Rao's, which is this fancy Italian place.
00:09:44.000 Actually, let me explain something to you.
00:09:47.000 There's, I think it's called the Manhattan Club, and there's Rao's.
00:09:50.000 Mobsters and blue-collar tough guys and drug dealers and stuff are super impressed when they go to the Manhattan Club because it's a very elitist, waspy club that only a bunch of- it looks- everyone there at that club looks like the grumpy Muppets, the bald Muppets.
00:10:06.000 So it's one of the most elite clubs in Manhattan and mafioso types are fucking thrilled by it.
00:10:17.000 Conversely, Rao's is the most elite restaurant for the mafia types.
00:10:23.000 So I'm still trying to get into Rao's just so I can say I've been there.
00:10:27.000 Basically, Rao's is an okay Italian restaurant with like five tables in it that you have to wait a year to get to.
00:10:35.000 But what they do is they take that cachet where they probably don't even turn a profit.
00:10:39.000 And then they make the sauce, the Rao's spaghetti sauce, which is in a factory.
00:10:44.000 It's like, like a mom I used to make.
00:10:46.000 Meanwhile, giant cement mixtures of it are being poured into eight million jars a day.
00:10:52.000 So it's a scam, but it's funny because like bourgeois white guys like me are totally thrilled to go to Rao's and are enamored by the crime of it all.
00:11:01.000 Meanwhile, like some Goomba's mistress is like, fucking Rao's, fuck it.
00:11:05.000 That's boring.
00:11:06.000 I'm there every week, just spaghetti.
00:11:09.000 But she would poop her pants at the Manhattan Club, whereas white guys like me go to the Manhattan Club and it's just like, oh, I'm meeting my uncle.
00:11:15.000 Fuck, I'm off on a million tangents here.
00:11:21.000 This is a real tangential episode.
00:11:25.000 So... We have to get back to the subject, the professor.
00:11:33.000 So he says to her, to the wife, I'm sorry Muriel, we're in love.
00:11:40.000 Okay.
00:11:41.000 So she just gets her lawyers, loads her machine guns, and just puts them up against the wall.
00:11:47.000 And I agree with that.
00:11:48.000 Oh, sorry, that's what I was getting to.
00:11:50.000 Chuck Zito invited him to Rao's and said, I'm sorry, but I'm too close to the word snitch.
00:11:56.000 And he goes, I understand.
00:11:57.000 And then Chuck Zito knocks him out, pushes him on the button, right?
00:12:01.000 Hits him on the lower chin.
00:12:02.000 Boom, he's out.
00:12:04.000 Has his jaw wired shut, has to drink smoothies for the rest of the month.
00:12:07.000 And that's just the way it goes when you mess with Chuck Zito.
00:12:10.000 By the way, you need to get his book.
00:12:12.000 I think it's called Street Justice.
00:12:14.000 It's so good!
00:12:16.000 He's like a tough guy.
00:12:17.000 What are you going to do?
00:12:18.000 Hell's Angel kind of guy.
00:12:20.000 But he's a great writer.
00:12:22.000 Or at least he narrated a great story to a great ghost writer.
00:12:26.000 Don't kill me for that, Chuck.
00:12:28.000 It's all about being a biker and being a tough guy and being in Hollywood as an action hero.
00:12:35.000 He was on Oz for a while.
00:12:37.000 But he also is really mad at himself in the book for fucking up and spending too much time at the Hells Angels Clubhouse and not enough time with his daughter and his wife.
00:12:46.000 And he said, I fucked up my marriage that way and I screwed up.
00:12:48.000 I spent more time with my motorbike than my daughter.
00:12:50.000 Isn't that awesome?
00:12:52.000 I love when people are self-critical, especially these youngsters today.
00:12:57.000 They're so proud of themselves.
00:12:59.000 Every time they take a shit, they want to fucking put it in a glass case and say, me go poopoo.
00:13:06.000 So, he picks a fight with her, basically.
00:13:10.000 And she's a biker in this.
00:13:12.000 She's Chuck Zito in this situation.
00:13:13.000 So she goes, alright, fine.
00:13:14.000 I mean, I gave you a choice.
00:13:16.000 And so she takes him for everything he's worth.
00:13:17.000 Takes the house.
00:13:18.000 I don't think you care about custody of your kids when they're 20, right?
00:13:22.000 I don't want custody of my kids when they're 20.
00:13:23.000 I don't want custody of my kids when they're 18 in one day.
00:13:26.000 I saw some article in Rolling Stone, I forget who the musician was, but it was like fucking, I don't know, Perry Farrell or someone, and it was like, his troubling relationship with his father and how he left home at 17.
00:13:39.000 Yeah, that's about when you leave home, 17, 18.
00:13:42.000 And troubling relationship with your father in your teens?
00:13:45.000 Yeah, that's pretty much the deal.
00:13:47.000 What are you, a daddy's boy?
00:13:49.000 Like in that 30 Rock, Tina Fey, or maybe it was Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt, where he goes, oh god, I'm a total daddy's boy.
00:13:56.000 I went on a trip to Alaska, and of course, the second I come home, I'm straight to daddy's house.
00:14:02.000 Oh god, such a daddy's boy.
00:14:08.000 Daddy's boy, I love that phrase.
00:14:10.000 Anyway, yeah, of course you hate your dad.
00:14:11.000 It's like wolves, right?
00:14:13.000 In an alpha pack- No, an alpha pack.
00:14:15.000 In any wolf pack, the main wolf, the alpha wolf, is constantly, every single day, fighting the number two.
00:14:22.000 And that's so he can- It's sort of like the elections, and eventually he becomes the number one.
00:14:27.000 The alpha can't fight anymore.
00:14:28.000 That's what goes on with teenagers and their dads.
00:14:31.000 They don't get along.
00:14:32.000 Even my nine-year-old, I can feel some conflict here, and he's got a one-up on me, because he knows a bizarre amount about baseball now.
00:14:40.000 He can name any World Series winner, he knows all the rules, and there's an infinite number of rules.
00:14:44.000 So now when I ask him a question, like, what's a, I don't understand, an in-park, home run, he'll sort of look, like, tilt his head down and then look up at me, like, are you serious right now?
00:14:54.000 So I'm already getting the teenager shit.
00:14:57.000 From both of my oldest kids, actually.
00:14:59.000 But that's my job, I don't mind.
00:15:00.000 I'm the main wolf and I gotta fight every day.
00:15:04.000 But he took her to the cleaner's so he's got some bullshit fucking apartment.
00:15:08.000 He's probably at zero, right?
00:15:10.000 So he's just living off his salary and I'm sure he got a, let's say a $1,500 a month apartment because he has a regular paycheck as a professor.
00:15:19.000 And he wants his kids to want to come by.
00:15:22.000 So he made his apartment cool!
00:15:24.000 So he's a 57-year-old with a kind of a one-bedroom apartment, but the kitchen has a bar, man.
00:15:33.000 It's got a keg.
00:15:34.000 You want a bud?
00:15:35.000 Well, here's a pint of bud, dude.
00:15:37.000 Yeah, you want to ride a skateboard around the house?
00:15:39.000 I don't fucking give a shit.
00:15:41.000 Let me put on some punk.
00:15:43.000 Let me put on some rap music, and I don't even care if you smoke a joint.
00:15:46.000 Fucking tip the ashes on the floor.
00:15:48.000 I'm the cool dad.
00:15:50.000 Oh my god, what's sadder than that?
00:15:52.000 Remember, I had a place in upstate New York for a long time, and for whatever reason, my wife, I think she took the kids to her mother's in Madison.
00:15:59.000 So I was building a play set, which takes a long fucking time.
00:16:05.000 One of those big huge ones, like with the slide that you go up the stairs.
00:16:08.000 It took me about four days.
00:16:09.000 I remember I would just use up my drill battery.
00:16:13.000 Until it died, and that's usually when the sun was going down, and then just start the next day.
00:16:18.000 You know, building the stairs and the platform, and then there's the swings section of it.
00:16:23.000 It just goes on and on and on.
00:16:26.000 But while I was building it for fun, I pretended that I was divorced, and I was trying to make my house look cool for the kids so they'd like coming here.
00:16:33.000 Jesus Christ, it felt like I had a sandbag in my chest.
00:16:37.000 It was the most profoundly sad little game
00:16:42.000 Little improv game I ever played.
00:16:44.000 You poor bastards out there, you dads who are trying to make your house seem cool for the kids and they get there all grumpy because they haven't been there in two weeks and they're starting to like the new boyfriend?
00:17:01.000 Oh, they must talk about the dad to you.
00:17:05.000 Yeah.
00:17:05.000 Danny has a convertible now.
00:17:08.000 Dad, it goes like 170 miles an hour.
00:17:10.000 We were going, you went 170 miles in a car.
00:17:13.000 Oh yeah.
00:17:13.000 I'm not supposed to tell you that.
00:17:14.000 Danny told me not to tell you.
00:17:15.000 Whoops.
00:17:17.000 No, it's really fast.
00:17:18.000 It's called a, um, I think it's called an MG.
00:17:21.000 Apparently it's like a collector car from Britain.
00:17:24.000 It's worth a hundred grand.
00:17:26.000 He's got so much money, dad.
00:17:28.000 Meanwhile, you're in a one-bedroom apartment and your big splash, your MG, was a beer tap.
00:17:35.000 Hey kids, drink some beer?
00:17:38.000 I don't know, people ask me if I could get along with my, if I got divorced, can I get along with my wife's new husband and my ex-wife?
00:17:47.000 And I go, why would I be friends with two people at the bottom of the East River?
00:17:51.000 Like, what are we gonna talk about?
00:17:52.000 I'm gonna put on scuba dive equipment and go down there?
00:17:55.000 Blub blub blub.
00:17:55.000 Like, I don't speak blub blub blub.
00:17:57.000 What am I, a fish?
00:17:58.000 I'm not gonna talk to them.
00:18:01.000 Anyway, so.
00:18:04.000 That song.
00:18:05.000 By, uh, We Lost Our Way or something.
00:18:09.000 It was all about how you have to go to the house of alt-right dudes and kill them.
00:18:16.000 Or knock them out.
00:18:17.000 Shoot them.
00:18:18.000 You just got knocked the fuck out.
00:18:19.000 The punishment fits the crime.
00:18:20.000 It's the chorus.
00:18:21.000 Those guys got doxxed for that, by the way, and their big beautiful suburban homes in Long Island were exposed.
00:18:26.000 But it's a really strange... It's actually a communist mentality.
00:18:30.000 Right?
00:18:30.000 That's why Mao killed 60 million people, because they disagree with him.
00:18:34.000 Although I believe recent studies have pulled it up to 80 million!
00:18:37.000 Mao is the winner!
00:18:39.000 Eat your heart out, Hitler.
00:18:41.000 Eat your heart out, Stalin.
00:18:43.000 We have a winner.
00:18:44.000 Although, you could argue with Hitler, he's responsible for more than just the 6 million Jews, he's responsible for all the deaths.
00:18:50.000 And I believe that brings him up to 100 mil, which kicks Mao's ass.
00:18:58.000 But then you could also argue that Churchill was responsible for tens of millions of deaths for getting involved.
00:19:05.000 And then, of course, Stalin would be guilty for the... I think the Russian deaths were like 60 million?
00:19:14.000 Two-thirds of the deaths of the entire war were Russian?
00:19:18.000 I'm not sure about that.
00:19:19.000 Don't quote me on that.
00:19:21.000 But anyway.
00:19:24.000 I disagree with the alt-right, obviously.
00:19:26.000 Most people do.
00:19:27.000 I'd say 99.99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999
00:19:47.000 Like racists, bonafide racists, I'd say there's 3,000.
00:19:51.000 But people who are optimistic, like Richard Spencer, about America becoming 100% white, I'm gonna say that's like 1,300 people.
00:20:00.000 And as Derek Hunter pointed out recently,
00:20:04.000 The woman's NBA, a good turnout for them is about 7,000.
00:20:09.000 When the KKK was at its peak, they had 7,000 members.
00:20:13.000 But we're going back now to 1920s, 1930s when the American population was very small.
00:20:20.000 So you take the peak of the KKK,
00:20:23.000 And then today, with our huge population, right?
00:20:26.000 What is it, 400 million?
00:20:29.000 Our huge pop- I always get that wrong.
00:20:31.000 Let me just check the American population here.
00:20:34.000 You take our huge population today, and you look at that, and it's only 7,000.
00:20:40.000 So, I'm not- 320 million.
00:20:48.000 So, infinitesimally small people watch women's basketball, and that number's the same as the KKK at its peak.
00:20:54.000 So, basically, we're not talking about a thing.
00:20:56.000 It's irrelevant.
00:20:58.000 But we keep hearing about it, and this song is all about that.
00:21:03.000 And the reason I brought it up, because it's been in my head all day, as Monday Night's GOML pointed out, we had tons of riots this weekend, tons of fights, tons of brawls.
00:21:16.000 And 99% of them were families belong together.
00:21:21.000 And this was America mad at Trump for separating kids from their families.
00:21:26.000 Which was Clinton's law, and all Trump was doing was enforce it, which is what he said he would do, and then he erased the law and changed it, so now he's the guy who removed Clinton's law about separating people from their families.
00:21:41.000 But to both Clinton and Trump, I say, what were you supposed to do?
00:21:45.000 Like, if you get a Coke dealer, are you not separating him from his family?
00:21:49.000 And if that Coke dealer is traveling, what do you do?
00:21:54.000 Like say the coke dealer was from Miami and you catch him with his kids and he's dealing coke in Seattle.
00:22:00.000 What do you do?
00:22:01.000 Surely you have to put the kids in a holding thing somewhere while you figure out what the hell or how they're going to get back.
00:22:07.000 And then they're saying now, um, well now the, these people are being forced to pay hundreds of dollars, thousands in travel fare to go get their kids.
00:22:16.000 Well, yeah, that's what would happen if you're a traveling criminal.
00:22:19.000 No, but I'm saying that you shouldn't be illegal.
00:22:22.000 There's no such thing as an illegal person.
00:22:24.000 Oh, okay.
00:22:25.000 And I want to abolish ICE.
00:22:26.000 Oh, I'm sorry.
00:22:28.000 So there's no more borders?
00:22:30.000 If you don't have border enforcement, there's no more borders.
00:22:32.000 And we'd be the only country, I believe Somalia is the only other country that we would, and we'd be in there.
00:22:37.000 So right now, I believe Somalia is the only country in the world without borders.
00:22:42.000 Now I'm sure there's other shitholes where they don't really care if you cross the border, but I know my buddy crossed the border in Eastern Europe back in the early 90s when we were traveling around Europe squatting, and he got in big shit, and that was some fucking hellhole.
00:22:59.000 Eastern Germany.
00:23:01.000 No, it wasn't even Eastern Germany.
00:23:02.000 It was like Czechoslovakia.
00:23:03.000 That's what it was.
00:23:04.000 It was Czechoslovakia.
00:23:06.000 And I can't remember if Stalin was still in control then, but he will have just left.
00:23:10.000 It was 1992.
00:23:14.000 So now Somalia and us are the only two countries in the world without borders.
00:23:18.000 Okay, well you realize now we're going to have a flood of immigrants to the tune of millions and millions and millions.
00:23:26.000 Like a hundred million.
00:23:27.000 Is that what you want?
00:23:28.000 It's sort of like in this outside of Chicago where they go, we don't want the cops anymore.
00:23:31.000 And you go, okay, you're going to start dying.
00:23:33.000 Good.
00:23:34.000 I want to die.
00:23:35.000 Okay.
00:23:36.000 And now we're up to two murders a day.
00:23:39.000 Weekend battles in Chicago where it's 38.
00:23:41.000 I was talking to a war vet from
00:23:43.000 Uh, Afghanistan.
00:23:44.000 And I said, a battle where 38 people get shot, that would be a doozy, right?
00:23:48.000 And he goes, oh Jesus, it would be in books.
00:23:50.000 It'd be like the Battle of Karak Nadar.
00:23:52.000 Like it would be a thing.
00:23:53.000 You'd study it in history class.
00:23:54.000 It'd be a major battle.
00:23:56.000 38 shot?
00:23:57.000 That's a slaughter.
00:23:59.000 And that's just also called a weekend in the south side of Chicago.
00:24:04.000 Anyway, so most of the rallies were about the kids and the immigrants and I don't care about that stuff.
00:24:10.000 I think it's just optics.
00:24:12.000 You might as well say Trump is hurting puppies and have a bunch of pictures of sad puppies, you know.
00:24:16.000 We got way more children in foster care.
00:24:19.000 We got children without parents here in America.
00:24:23.000 We got like three million fatherless children.
00:24:27.000 Three million kids without parents in America.
00:24:30.000 We have something like half a million kids in foster care right now.
00:24:34.000 So the fact that some illegals who are allegedly the children of these parents, and a lot of these kids are just used as passports.
00:24:43.000 Hey, I'm going to pretend I'm your father so I can get across because we've been getting away with it in the past.
00:24:47.000 So a lot of them are just used as fake kids.
00:24:50.000 Uh, the fact that there's been some horrible inconveniences there, and these kids are kept in very good conditions, not cages, unlike Obama.
00:24:57.000 And Obama separated a lot more kids from his parents.
00:25:00.000 90,000, I believe?
00:25:01.000 So the fact that all that is going on means, I'm not falling for your shit.
00:25:04.000 And I'm not falling for the sad kid and the crying little girl on the cover of Time who hadn't been separated from her parents, for the record.
00:25:10.000 You know what I mean?
00:25:11.000 Blah blah blah blah blah.
00:25:12.000 It's all tricks.
00:25:13.000 And it works on- tricks work on chicks.
00:25:16.000 Chicks vote based on their emotions, mostly.
00:25:18.000 They're more emotional voters.
00:25:19.000 So if your numbers are dwindling, and they are, there's this whole new hashtag with the left, walk away, where they're encouraging them to leave the party.
00:25:28.000 It's working.
00:25:29.000 So they go, we gotta pull out the big guns here.
00:25:31.000 Throw some sad kids in the mix.
00:25:32.000 And I've noticed this, by the way, with fucking movies.
00:25:37.000 Please, movies.
00:25:38.000 Please.
00:25:39.000 Stop.
00:25:40.000 Murdering children even good movies like that movie about the Wild West that's out now Just came out like a couple months ago.
00:25:48.000 I forget what it's called, but it's a really accurate depiction of Indian cowboys and Indians, and I think Christian Bale's in it and The Indians are not portrayed as saints.
00:25:59.000 There's bad Indians and good Indians and same with the whites There's bad whites and good whites, and they show slaughter on both sides.
00:26:04.000 It's very
00:26:06.000 That's a very fair treatment of the Wild West.
00:26:10.000 But, of course, at the beginning, they gotta murder a fucking bunch of kids to pull us into it.
00:26:15.000 And I can't... These are my two pet peeves with movies these days.
00:26:18.000 One, stop murdering a kid in the first minute to get me into it.
00:26:22.000 Like Manchester by the Sea, the whole movie was dead kids.
00:26:25.000 Or even Stranger Things.
00:26:27.000 It starts out, I wanna pull you in, uh, a kid is gone.
00:26:30.000 Kid might be dead.
00:26:31.000 Oh, for fuck's sakes.
00:26:33.000 Even last night, I decided to try to finally watch that movie Bright.
00:26:37.000 Larry!
00:26:38.000 Larry!
00:27:02.000 And then I press play.
00:27:04.000 The best season ever.
00:27:05.000 And you realize, oh, it's because there's a jihad out on him in the movie.
00:27:12.000 I mean, in the last series.
00:27:14.000 So you see that as Islamophobic.
00:27:17.000 Sometimes movies get bad reviews when they're already PC, but the critic is so left-wing that they're not satisfied.
00:27:23.000 Like the new Incredibles, some feminist at the Post gave it a terrible grade because she said the dad wasn't in tune enough with his family.
00:27:32.000 He didn't seem to know enough about parenting.
00:27:34.000 And he had a very old-fashioned view of parenting, like he wasn't good at changing diapers and stuff.
00:27:39.000 But then my family went to see it, I didn't go with them, and they told me the dad's a stay-at-home dad in it.
00:27:44.000 So we strip the father of his career, the mom becomes a breadwinner, and the feminists go, sorry, not good enough.
00:27:51.000 I need him to be in drag, and to take it up the butt.
00:27:54.000 Up the cartoon butt.
00:27:58.000 Yeah, I'm watching Bright.
00:27:59.000 They want to pull us into it, so they have the elves kill a fucking Mexican's baby at the beginning.
00:28:04.000 Just to tug at our heartstrings.
00:28:05.000 Stop.
00:28:06.000 Just write a good story.
00:28:08.000 Make characters that have depth.
00:28:11.000 Show me some ups and downs with them.
00:28:12.000 Show me them handle a situation that involves conflict, and then I'll like the character, and then I'll want the character to live, and I'll care what happens to them.
00:28:20.000 You don't have to go shoot a fucking two-year-old in the head.
00:28:22.000 At the beginning of your movie, to make me cry so I all of a sudden care.
00:28:26.000 Jesus Christ, it's like the crack cocaine of plot lines.
00:28:31.000 So that's my one pet peeve.
00:28:33.000 My second pet peeve is the fucking broads.
00:28:37.000 Look, I know there are some tough chicks.
00:28:39.000 I've met exactly three in my life who are good fighters and want to throw down and can handle they selves in a situation.
00:28:48.000 None of them are cops, by the way.
00:28:49.000 The cops in New York, the female cops, actually the female cops everywhere, are just large bottomed ladies, usually Hispanic, who could not beat up a fly.
00:29:00.000 And I think it puts men in jeopardy.
00:29:02.000 There's some Australian documentary coming out about the Proud Boys and in it they go, they couldn't give us one reason why this sort of anti-male culture hurts men.
00:29:14.000 I'm like, you didn't ask me.
00:29:16.000 I'll give you 1,000 from children being medicated for being too boisterous as young boys in school
00:29:23.000 To kids getting sent home for going pew pew with a Pop-Tart.
00:29:26.000 To men having to apologize in college every time they open their mouths and say, I'm a white male, but I come from a place of privilege, but then explaining it.
00:29:36.000 To the brutal custody men get, the terrible custody men get in divorce.
00:29:44.000 Now, that's not whining, that's just stating a fact.
00:29:46.000 I'm still gonna win.
00:29:47.000 It's like the war on Christmas.
00:29:48.000 There is a war on Christmas.
00:29:49.000 Christmas is still gonna win.
00:29:50.000 That doesn't mean there's not a war on it.
00:30:06.000 You know?
00:30:07.000 Like if, if everywhere you went, little kids punched at you and screamed at you and threw bottles at you, if, you know, they're all under ten, you're gonna be fine.
00:30:15.000 But it's still, you're gonna acknowledge, hey, everywhere I go, nine-year-olds try to kill me.
00:30:20.000 I'm still gonna beat them all up, and I'm not scared of them.
00:30:22.000 I'll just knock the knife out of their little hands.
00:30:25.000 But it's still a thing.
00:30:27.000 That's what the left doesn't get.
00:30:28.000 They say you can't be winning and still
00:30:32.000 Be victimized.
00:30:33.000 You can be victimized and not be a victim, is what I'm screaming.
00:30:38.000 Anyway, so my second pet peeve is chicks in movies, action movies.
00:30:44.000 I've been watching a lot of action movies, because I go to DC a lot, and I don't want the guy on the train next to me seeing me watch some Harry Met Sally romance, because that's private, especially if there's going to be a sex scene.
00:30:56.000 The idea of me sitting watching a sex scene with a stranger next to me, God forbid it's a woman, is just unthinkable.
00:31:02.000 So, I just do action.
00:31:04.000 That's nice, and every time you look over and see what I'm seeing, you're just seeing someone do a roundhouse kick.
00:31:09.000 Great.
00:31:11.000 So I get these action movies.
00:31:12.000 Chickity-chick-chick, chickity-chick-chick-chick, chick-chick-chick-chick, chick-chick-chick-chickity-chick.
00:31:18.000 Fucking Annihilation.
00:31:19.000 I'm watching this one.
00:31:20.000 One of them is the mulatto from Dear White People.
00:31:23.000 It's an array of badass bitches going into, through a wall that's another dimension.
00:31:31.000 And fighting interplanetary magic things.
00:31:36.000 Like the Wizard of Oz meets a horror- meets alien.
00:31:41.000 So they're shooting a crocodile who's magic and he's got 17 mouths and they're slaying into him with their M16s.
00:31:48.000 They're doing backflips and all this crap.
00:31:51.000 Is someone calling me?
00:31:55.000 Um, just text me if you want to.
00:31:58.000 My home is so big that my wife and I text each other.
00:32:01.000 Where are you?
00:32:03.000 Um, and they got these M16s slung over their shoulder.
00:32:06.000 They're all women.
00:32:07.000 Half, half of them are black.
00:32:09.000 Always light-skinned blacks like the Cosby Show cast.
00:32:12.000 And fucking, what's her name?
00:32:13.000 Uh, the skinny chick who's Israeli, who's super hot, who's a little tiny, uh... The movie's Annihilation.
00:32:21.000 You look it up.
00:32:22.000 And she's out there
00:32:25.000 Women can't even do machine gun sounds, and they're using machine guns in this movie.
00:32:28.000 So that's stupid to watch and dumb.
00:32:30.000 And there's a way to do that, by the way.
00:32:32.000 Like with Ghostbusters 2, make them puke with fear.
00:32:36.000 Or make them go, I'm in over my head, or I guess I can do it.
00:32:39.000 You know, the way women normally act.
00:32:41.000 Women make you get a spider out of the bathtub.
00:32:44.000 They're not going to shoot aliens.
00:32:45.000 But instead, they always make them into dudes.
00:32:48.000 What am I, a lesbian?
00:32:49.000 I'm not attracted to women who go, it's fucking ass-kicking time, shithead!
00:32:57.000 Kick down the door.
00:32:58.000 That's how nerds see women.
00:33:02.000 Incels, if you will.
00:33:03.000 Incels represent involuntary celibates, represent a minuscule part of the population.
00:33:08.000 So stop making all my action movies the way nerdy virgins see women.
00:33:13.000 I'm not intimidated by women, so I don't see them as like these scary giant beasts that kick down front doors.
00:33:21.000 So then I'm watching Bright last night, which turns out to be pretty good, and the reason it got bad reviews is because I think it depicts racism in a funny and nuanced way, and yeah, it's kinda cool.
00:33:38.000 And it's not PC.
00:33:39.000 Why the fuck is my wife calling me?
00:33:43.000 I'm just gonna ignore her.
00:33:45.000 I told her what I was going to do.
00:33:48.000 Uh, but now I'm worried it's an emergency.
00:33:53.000 Hold on a sec.
00:33:58.000 What is it?
00:34:00.000 God damn it!
00:34:07.000 Sorry about that.
00:34:10.000 I sound like Anthony Cumia was showing on his show a commercial from the 50s and it was for Anison and this guy comes home and he says, his wife says, we have a PTA meeting tonight so we should get ready and he goes, God damn it Muriel, I just got home!
00:34:27.000 Give me a second to relax!
00:34:29.000 And everyone was laughing about how sexist he is and how grumpy and old-fashioned he is.
00:34:35.000 Uh, that's me.
00:34:36.000 When shit goes wrong, I get real mad.
00:34:38.000 Especially when I get interrupted at work because I'm trying to generate income for the family and you're thwarting me.
00:34:46.000 And you throw me off my groove.
00:34:47.000 But anyway, in that movie, Bright, I'm watching it.
00:34:53.000 It's pretty cool.
00:34:54.000 And I'm like, finally, just a dude movie.
00:34:57.000 I'm in a monogamous relationship with my wife.
00:35:00.000 I want women to wear burkas.
00:35:02.000 I don't like looking at hot chicks.
00:35:04.000 It distracts me.
00:35:05.000 I saw Death Wish with Bruce Willis.
00:35:09.000 And that's one of the instances where you do want all the kids dead and the wife, because that's the Charles Bronson original.
00:35:16.000 In the new Death Wish, his fucking daughter's a 10.
00:35:20.000 She's an incredibly hot 19 year old.
00:35:23.000 Now I'm distracted, and she doesn't die.
00:35:27.000 So, there's like this hot chick in a coma.
00:35:29.000 Hot chick in a coma, I know, I know, it's serious.
00:35:36.000 So that's not fun.
00:35:39.000 I'm pro Sharia law.
00:35:40.000 I want all pretty girls in burkas now that I can't have them.
00:35:43.000 I find them distracting.
00:35:45.000 So I'm watching an action movie.
00:35:46.000 It's Will Smith, who, by the way, not a great actor, not a bad actor.
00:35:50.000 He's just a nice plate of mashed potatoes.
00:35:52.000 Put some salt on them.
00:35:53.000 Boom, you get the job done.
00:35:55.000 That's what I'm not looking for.
00:35:57.000 For Girard Depardieu in every movie, that's the best actor I could think of, by the way.
00:36:04.000 So Will Smith is just doing his job, being a black guy, being a cop, being a good cop with a heart of gold.
00:36:08.000 Of course he has to have a white wife.
00:36:11.000 And killing fairies, actual literal fairies, I don't mean homosexuals.
00:36:15.000 And I'm watching it, and cool, and we got it.
00:36:17.000 And then the chief comes out.
00:36:19.000 Alright assholes, I need you on the streets.
00:36:21.000 Guess who the chief of police is, who's kicking ass and taking names, not taking any shit?
00:36:26.000 Margaret Cho.
00:36:28.000 Margaret Cho.
00:36:31.000 Margaret Cho is the chief of police.
00:36:33.000 All right, fuckheads.
00:36:34.000 I've been on the beat a long time.
00:36:36.000 I've been through a lot of shit.
00:36:38.000 I've killed a lot of fucking assholes.
00:36:41.000 And I'm Margaret Cho.
00:36:45.000 So then I'm yanked out of it now.
00:36:48.000 And then she becomes part of this other big ring of tough guys.
00:36:51.000 Anyway, I won't give away anything, but they take care of her.
00:36:54.000 Or Jason Bourne.
00:36:56.000 Jason Bourne.
00:36:56.000 Cool.
00:36:57.000 I love those movies.
00:36:59.000 Especially on a big screen.
00:37:02.000 That cool one where he's going through the various apartments in that European building.
00:37:07.000 Like, I don't know where the hell he is.
00:37:09.000 Budapest.
00:37:10.000 He goes out of one window into the other.
00:37:12.000 You know, they're all condensed in these European apartments.
00:37:16.000 That's so cool.
00:37:18.000 And then I see the most recent one I think is called Jason Bourne.
00:37:22.000 And, uh,
00:37:24.000 He finds out that the CIA killed his father, which would piss you off.
00:37:28.000 So the CIA goes, can you come back to the CIA?
00:37:30.000 You're really good at killing.
00:37:31.000 And he goes, no, you killed my dad and I'm in a bad mood.
00:37:34.000 So they go, we need someone who can identify with Jason.
00:37:38.000 But he's also a fucking insane badass and super tough.
00:37:42.000 And a hacker.
00:37:44.000 Who can find anyone online and knows where everyone is.
00:37:47.000 So a genius, tough guy.
00:37:49.000 Who should we choose?
00:37:51.000 I know a Dutch supermodel.
00:37:54.000 Literally a supermodel from the Netherlands.
00:37:57.000 That's who plays this chick who's gonna convince Jason Bourne to join the CIA, come back to the CIA.
00:38:04.000 What?
00:38:06.000 And by the way, she became Tomb Raider, which is also a nerd fantasy where they get to see violence and pretty girls at the exact same time.
00:38:14.000 That's not something that appeals to us.
00:38:17.000 Stop putting broads.
00:38:18.000 Or another one!
00:38:20.000 Hurricane Heist I put in.
00:38:22.000 Okay, you're gonna rob a bank.
00:38:25.000 And they steal the thing from the Den of Thieves where it's money that's about to be shredded.
00:38:30.000 It's the exact same plotline.
00:38:32.000 They're just stealing pre-shredded money.
00:38:33.000 I don't know how you can do that.
00:38:35.000 They're both out now, by the way, on demand.
00:38:37.000 Same pre-shredded money is being stolen by two different groups in two different movies.
00:38:41.000 But anyway, these guys, that's pretty big balls, I gotta say.
00:38:45.000 They're getting together with the local police and robbing, spoiler alert, sorry, robbing this money, this pre-shredded money.
00:38:52.000 600 million dollars, I believe?
00:38:55.000 Of it?
00:38:56.000 Guess who's gonna stop them in their tracks?
00:39:00.000 A super fucking hot chick.
00:39:03.000 What?
00:39:04.000 Yeah, during a hurricane, the biggest one in the history of man, with cars whipping through the sky like someone's throwing rocks, she's there, not leaving her town, ready to brawl with a gang of hurricane thieves.
00:39:20.000 What?
00:39:21.000 Why?
00:39:22.000 Like, what is that for?
00:39:24.000 Is that so you, if you bring your female date, she can watch it too and identify with the girl?
00:39:30.000 That's not fun.
00:39:31.000 Anyway, that brings me to the whole beginning of this episode.
00:39:33.000 I've been trying to start this episode for exactly 40 minutes.
00:39:37.000 And, uh, the beginning is, Joey Gibson, a friend of mine, half Japanese by the way,
00:39:44.000 He is running for Senate.
00:39:46.000 He also runs this group called Patriot Prayer.
00:39:49.000 He's a very devout Christian who prays to God every day, and I love him to death.
00:39:54.000 Great guy.
00:39:55.000 But his thing is, he has this, you know, Jesus mentality, where he says Antifa are violent.
00:40:00.000 He lives in Portland, by the way, where Antifa is to Portland what the mob is to Reggio di Calabria, Italy.
00:40:08.000 They are mainstream.
00:40:10.000 They antifa there, they teach in the schools, they're your kindergarten teacher, they're your professors, they teach at the local universities, they teach geography.
00:40:18.000 Um... Del Rias?
00:40:21.000 Alexander Del Rias, I think his name is?
00:40:23.000 He's one of these professors who wrote about the whole thing in Farharet's magazine in Israel, which is phenomenally left-wing, and they get antifa to write articles about antifa.
00:40:33.000 So it's a little biased, but um... So, uh...
00:40:38.000 This town is very bad for Joey in the sense that he gets death threats every day, they come by his house, he's totally armed, he's got cameras everywhere ready for an invasion.
00:40:49.000 It's like being a white farmer in South Africa, basically.
00:40:51.000 I'm exaggerating a bit, but his life is still in jeopardy.
00:40:55.000 So he says, I'm going to have a march, and if Antifa wants to fight me, and they want to kill me, fine.
00:41:00.000 That'll just show the world who they are.
00:41:02.000 But I'm going to march for, well, to promote my campaign, but also march for prayer, march for Trump, march for the flag, and say that Antifa isn't going to control us anymore.
00:41:13.000 They're not going to control this town.
00:41:14.000 We are part of this town too, you know, as conservatives.
00:41:18.000 So, all these proud boys get on planes, trains, and automobiles and head over there and say, no Joey, you're not gonna get beat up, we're gonna surround you.
00:41:26.000 So they go there to the event, and again, this had nothing to do with families belonging together, even though it was the same, um, same day.
00:41:35.000 They go down there and the police say, okay, then they police form a perimeter and they go, you can do your talk here, but we're going to make sure there's no arms.
00:41:43.000 So they take away not just brass knuckles or anything illegal, like those telescopic batons, but pepper spray, pen knives, anything that could be used as a weapon.
00:41:55.000 So the guys have nothing now.
00:41:57.000 They have their, they wear these sort of like motorcycle armor around their chests.
00:42:03.000 Helmets, using batting helmets for baseball so you can see and everything.
00:42:10.000 And then masks and goggles for smoke bombs and pepper spray.
00:42:16.000 They go and they do a bunch of speeches.
00:42:18.000 They rap.
00:42:20.000 Again, very diverse crowd, despite what the press will tell you about how it's all white.
00:42:23.000 I actually had to send a legal letter to Haaretz that was written by an Antifa who was there, who actually picked up the kid who we knocked out, um, and tell them to change all white or we're going to sue you.
00:42:38.000 And then the author, the Antifa author said, it wasn't me.
00:42:40.000 My editor added that.
00:42:42.000 That's fucked up if he did, because he's in Israel.
00:42:46.000 By the way, Haaretz is so left-wing, they're anti-Semitic.
00:42:50.000 Like, they are pro-BDS, the sanctions against Israel.
00:42:54.000 They hate the settlements.
00:42:55.000 They're always talking about Zionists.
00:42:58.000 Like, you will see more anti-Semitic writing in Haaretz than you'll see in the alt-right press in America.
00:43:04.000 In fact, I find the two indistinguishable when it comes to talking about Jews in Israel.
00:43:08.000 And they're in fucking Israel.
00:43:11.000 Anyway.
00:43:13.000 So our guys are disarmed.
00:43:15.000 They do the talk.
00:43:15.000 Now they have to get home.
00:43:17.000 Now this is what happens all the time.
00:43:20.000 And I don't blame the cops for it.
00:43:21.000 The cops are just doing their job.
00:43:22.000 But the administration, the mayor, they say, all right, we're going to disarm them and then unleash Antifa on them.
00:43:28.000 Then there'll be a riot.
00:43:29.000 And then we get to say, we can't have Trump supporters here because riots happen.
00:43:33.000 And we tried to help you, but we couldn't.
00:43:36.000 And this frustrates the fuck out of the cops, too.
00:43:38.000 Sorry for swearing so much this episode.
00:43:41.000 The cops can't fight back because they're unarmed.
00:43:45.000 And why are they unarmed?
00:43:46.000 Because Portland has brutal gun laws, as does my hometown of New York City.
00:43:51.000 But if it didn't have street gun laws, I would be using WeThePeopleHolsters.com.
00:43:57.000 This is a holster company that uses hard plastic that you can customize to your gun, to your fit.
00:44:03.000 Fits in your pants perfectly.
00:44:04.000 It's got a great adjustability, so no matter what your body type is, it can fit comfortably in the front of your pants.
00:44:13.000 Big guns, small guns, they're about $34 each.
00:44:16.000 If you go to wethepeopleholsters.com and put in the code GAVIN, you can get $10 off.
00:44:21.000 That's now $24.
00:44:24.000 This incredible technology and I'm not that far away from getting my concealed carry for New York City.
00:44:33.000 I'm pretty excited about it.
00:44:34.000 Things are moving along quite well and I will have a WeThePeopleHolsters.com holster that I will get from WeThePeopleHolsters.com.
00:44:43.000 Please check them out.
00:44:44.000 It's a wonderful company.
00:44:45.000 They can also customize a design on your thingamadoodle.
00:44:50.000 And I would recommend, uh, the Get Off My Lawn logo.
00:44:54.000 Or maybe just a picture of me pointing at you saying, you talking to me?
00:44:59.000 Or maybe just Get Off My Lawn?
00:45:00.000 I don't know, it's up to you.
00:45:01.000 I can submit some ideas.
00:45:02.000 Anyway, no one has a gun.
00:45:05.000 And they're unleashed.
00:45:07.000 And then the cops are told to say, the permit for this rally has been revoked.
00:45:14.000 This is now a riot.
00:45:16.000 You're in a riot now.
00:45:18.000 We just magically turned it into a riot.
00:45:21.000 That'd be funny if the cop was giggling and he said it.
00:45:23.000 It was his last day.
00:45:24.000 It's like falling down at the end of falling down.
00:45:27.000 Well, um, you guys aren't gonna believe this shit, but, uh, it's technically not a march anymore.
00:45:27.000 Yeah.
00:45:33.000 Now it's a riot.
00:45:34.000 Yeah.
00:45:35.000 And I know you guys didn't do anything, but it's a riot now.
00:45:40.000 So, Antifa obviously not disarmed, because they never went through the perimeter.
00:45:45.000 And this happened in Berkeley, too.
00:45:47.000 And people go, oh, you're LARPing with all your little stupid little gear on?
00:45:51.000 No, actually, the body armor, that front part, a friend of mine who was there just sent me a picture of the front of it.
00:45:56.000 I tweeted it out, actually.
00:45:57.000 It has knife holes in it, because Antifa are stabbing at people now.
00:46:02.000 Especially in Portland, remember, this is the epicenter of Antifa.
00:46:06.000 And then they're throwing garbage, like hard garbage, like an old jar of spaghetti sauce, bricks, rocks.
00:46:13.000 They are pepper spraying Proud Boys and Joey Gibson guys and Patriots.
00:46:20.000 They are attacking them and
00:46:24.000 Um, the more, and they're doing this sort of hyena type attacks, where one will go in, and if they can get one guy down, then they'll all jump into them.
00:46:31.000 But, these guys are, like, there's nothing better than justified violence.
00:46:36.000 It's so exhilarating.
00:46:37.000 And here we are, standing up for someone like Joey Gibson, who just wants to pray.
00:46:42.000 And, uh, we're so happy to fight for him.
00:46:45.000 So we totally surround him, and they come, come on, bitches!
00:46:47.000 There's no fear there.
00:46:49.000 Oh, by the way, speaking of women in action movies, on both sides, and we're guilty of this too,
00:46:53.000 There's broads everywhere.
00:46:55.000 Chicks in flip-flops, smoking cigarettes, just walking along.
00:47:00.000 At a rumble.
00:47:02.000 At a brawl.
00:47:04.000 Why are women showing up to a rumble?
00:47:08.000 Like, imagine in the 1950s, remember the rumble seats that would be in the back of the hot rods?
00:47:13.000 And the greasers would have the chains and the switchblades?
00:47:16.000 And then imagine some chick in a poodle skirt and her two-toned shoes shows up chewing bubblegum saying, I want to be part of the fight.
00:47:24.000 Uh, no.
00:47:25.000 You'll die.
00:47:28.000 So anyway, our guys start swarming them and then just start mowing them down like grass.
00:47:35.000 Have you seen wheat been harvested before?
00:47:38.000 The way the enormous combines will just come in and fell the wheat?
00:47:44.000 Just toppling because these kids picked a fight with war vets and cops and ex-cops and blue-collar dudes with trades who bust their ass.
00:47:57.000 The lefties talk about workers of the world unite but they're unemployed and they live in their mother's basement and they're getting soft.
00:48:03.000 Their idea of attacking someone is to publish their address, just to sit passively on their computer and publish locations.
00:48:10.000 Meanwhile, our guys build swimming pools in Florida in the crippling heat, laying down rebar where there's no crossbreeds because you're down in a hole.
00:48:22.000 There's no relief from the heat down in that hole.
00:48:25.000 So a fight?
00:48:26.000 Yeah, I'd love one.
00:48:28.000 And they're just nailing and nailing him and then there's this guy who calls himself Rufio from Peter Pan.
00:48:35.000 He's huge and he's wearing all this gear and he's just knocking guys down.
00:48:39.000 Honestly, like cow tipping.
00:48:42.000 Just plop, plop, plop, plop.
00:48:44.000 And then there's video of this and it's become, it's gone viral and it's the reason I chose that opening line.
00:48:49.000 This guy comes up to him and he has one of those telescopic batons.
00:48:56.000 And those are illegal in Portland.
00:48:58.000 They're illegal everywhere.
00:48:59.000 I'd love to have one.
00:49:00.000 But I think this guy's watched so many movies that he thinks being whipped by one of these, being hit by one of these, is like Harry Potter going, poof, you're dead.
00:49:09.000 So he goes up to our guy, Rufio, who's a huge proud boy, 6'2", at least, built like a brick shithouse.
00:49:16.000 And he's like, come on, bitch.
00:49:18.000 And he's standing next to a girl who honestly weighs, I won't exaggerate, 100 pounds.
00:49:23.000 And she's not short.
00:49:25.000 She looks like Fido from the 7-Up commercials.
00:49:27.000 She looks like Where's Waldo.
00:49:29.000 And she's smoking a cigarette!
00:49:30.000 In a brawl!
00:49:32.000 And so he comes up.
00:49:34.000 The Antifa kid comes up and whips Rufio with the telescopic baton.
00:49:40.000 Which must sting like a motherfucker.
00:49:42.000 Although he's got all the pads and stuff on him.
00:49:46.000 So he blocks the first one.
00:49:47.000 He comes at him again.
00:49:49.000 Blocks the second one.
00:49:50.000 And then he does something which in the boxing community
00:49:53.000 Let's go!
00:50:11.000 And whoosh!
00:50:13.000 It goes over the cornfield, sort of like Superman on his way to save the day.
00:50:17.000 This fist is just riding from a mile away from his body.
00:50:20.000 Whoosh!
00:50:22.000 Fwoosh!
00:50:23.000 Sends the kid's sunglasses soaring off into space.
00:50:28.000 Like something out of the movie Asteroid.
00:50:31.000 Is that what it was called?
00:50:34.000 Nevermind the Sandra Bullocks?
00:50:36.000 Fwoosh!
00:50:37.000 They're gone!
00:50:40.000 And I'm sounding like the black guy in Police Academy.
00:50:43.000 And then the cops come.
00:50:49.000 And the guy passes out.
00:50:51.000 And then stands there, he's unconscious standing, like a dead tree in the woods.
00:50:57.000 And our boy needs to know if that guy's still a threat, right?
00:51:02.000 He might just be standing there, he might be about to hit him again with the thing.
00:51:06.000 So he pushes him over exactly the same way you push over dead trees when you're a little kid and you're walking through the forest and it takes a bit of a rocking and then
00:51:14.000 It falls.
00:51:15.000 So he pushed him over.
00:51:16.000 In the same way, say there was someone that you shot that tried to shoot you and they're still near their gun, you'd kick the gun away.
00:51:23.000 So he pushes him over as a way to say, like, can I take care of you?
00:51:26.000 Are you done?
00:51:27.000 I need to make sure that you're finished.
00:51:29.000 So he pushes him over.
00:51:30.000 Get it on my face.
00:51:31.000 I need to make sure I'm safe after you attacked me twice in a fucking row.
00:51:36.000 I don't know.
00:51:49.000 That he just shooed her.
00:51:51.000 I mean, this guy just knocked out two people, his adrenaline is pounding, he's in fight-or-flight mode, and you decide with your cigarette in your hand just to go over and start yelling expletives at him?
00:52:00.000 He had self-control.
00:52:01.000 He was clearly not drunk.
00:52:03.000 Thank your lucky stars he didn't do anything stupid like knock you out, lady.
00:52:09.000 So the cops take him in and luckily the video is everywhere.
00:52:11.000 It's a meme.
00:52:12.000 I showed about 10 on my show tonight and She the cops see it and they go well, that's self-defense no matter how you slice it Of course, we had lawyers ready.
00:52:23.000 My problem is we all have these aliases So I don't know half the guys real name.
00:52:26.000 So it's hard to find guys.
00:52:27.000 They have to call me first.
00:52:28.000 But anyway we're ready with the lawyers, but
00:52:32.000 It was, uh, it was a cut and dry case.
00:52:35.000 They just let him go.
00:52:37.000 And the moral of the story here is... Tenfold, but I'll reduce it.
00:52:45.000 The moral of the story here is don't pick fights with people that can beat you up.
00:52:48.000 And I don't mean that just literally, although I do mean it literally.
00:52:51.000 I mean it figuratively, too.
00:52:53.000 Like, you've got this arrogant attitude, you young people.
00:52:58.000 I have my enemies.
00:52:59.000 I think Hillary Clinton is responsible for murders.
00:53:03.000 I'm scared of that.
00:53:06.000 You know?
00:53:06.000 Or you have these illegals who go around with big signs.
00:53:09.000 I'm sick of being in the shadows.
00:53:11.000 Uh, you're gonna get busted, dude.
00:53:12.000 Hide.
00:53:12.000 The Chinese illegals are much smarter.
00:53:15.000 They don't rock the boat.
00:53:16.000 It's like Kras used to say, if you choose to stray from the path that you've been taught, don't expect help and don't get caught.
00:53:24.000 Stop picking fights with bikers.
00:53:26.000 Secondly, the other part of the lesson here is these villains you've made are not the villains that you think they are.
00:53:34.000 They're not Nazis for the billionth time.
00:53:38.000 They're not trying to separate children from their parents.
00:53:41.000 They're not anti-Semitic.
00:53:42.000 They're not racist.
00:53:43.000 They're not homophobic.
00:53:45.000 They're Islamophobic in the sense that they fear an Islamicization of the West, but that's an intellectual thing that you need to sit down in a salon with a cup of brandy to discuss.
00:53:58.000 So not only are you wrong to fight these- and by the way, if they were Nazis, you should be scared.
00:54:05.000 Like, we used to fight Nazis- Nazi skinheads in the 80s.
00:54:08.000 They would kick our ass.
00:54:09.000 I was scared to go fight them.
00:54:11.000 I wouldn't be a girl with a cigar and go, hey Nazi, fuck you, shove.
00:54:15.000 I go, uh-oh.
00:54:17.000 That's the crazy thing about this.
00:54:18.000 They can't really believe that they're fighting actual Nazis, because if they did, they'd be scared of them.
00:54:23.000 You know?
00:54:24.000 If you think people are MS-13, you go, holy shit, I think my neighbors might be MS-13.
00:54:29.000 You don't go over to your neighbor's house and go, ding dong, hey, asshole, you guys better not be fucking MS-13 or you're going to regret it.
00:54:37.000 You start packing your bags when you think your neighbors are MS-13.
00:54:40.000 So they clearly don't think that.
00:54:41.000 So I guess the moral of the story here is it's all fashion.
00:54:44.000 It's the mods and the rockers fighting on Brighton Beach.
00:54:46.000 But the deal here is, what's happened is, the mods are eight years old and the rockers are war vets.
00:54:53.000 So it's not a fair fight and why are you picking it?
00:54:57.000 You're gonna end up getting knocked the fuck out.