Comedian Louis CK has been accused of masturbating in front of a woman in a public place. Does this mean he should be allowed to do comedy? Or should he be banned from comedy altogether? Also, why Howard Stern is a sad sack and why he deserves $90 million a year, and why we should all be mad at him for it. Also, the stock market is doing a great job of valuing the idea that Howard Stern will be around for a thousand years after he dies, and it's a good thing because he deserves it because he's a dumbass. And if you don't like Howard Stern, then you should listen to Howard Stern. He's not only dumbass, he's dumbass goodass, and we're all dumbasses because of it. And he's also dumbass because he doesn't give a shit about anything else but his own stupid ass. And that's why he's the perfect fit for the job, right? I don't know, but I think he's going to be a good fit for this job, and I think it's pretty damn good, so why not give him a shot at it? I'll tell you what I think of him, and you'll agree with me that he's not just dumbass enough to get the job he deserves to have a chance to be the best job he's ever had, and that's pretty good at it, so he should get the best of everything he could possibly ask for. I mean what he asks for, and get the most out of it, and then he gets it, because he does the best he can get. That's not even close to what he gets, and he gets the most of what he needs to do, and the rest of us to do the most he deserves, right there, right here in this episode of his life, right in the middle of the world, right on par with us all. Thank you for listening to this episode, buddy! XOXO, JT. -JT xoxo -J.V. - JT - J.B. - SONGS - JL - J TAYL - R.C. - D.S. - P. D. C. - B. P. S. - A.J. - K. B. E. - M. A. - C. R. - E. LYNN - S. SONS
Transcript
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00:02:30.000And I've noticed that hanging out with comedians, not that that happens anymore, but back when I used to, they'd never laugh their heads off.
00:02:38.000I remember I was hanging with Kristen Schaal once, and I said something unbelievably hilarious, and she just goes, that's very funny.
00:03:05.000So they finally start getting popular and they get this Robert Crumb syndrome where they want to get revenge on all the previous years that they were a nobody.
00:04:07.000And I think part of his deal is not only does he do his radio show, but you also get all his content when he retires.
00:04:13.000So it ends up being a good investment because like a thousand years after he's dead, you have millions of hours of content that you can just keep looping around, looping around.
00:04:24.000After the whole planet's gone, you could just have, maybe aliens will come down here and they'll just think, oh, this was a planet where you just listened to Howard Stern all day.
00:04:36.000I know he sold out, he threw Alex Jones under the bus, and I'll never forgive him for that.
00:04:40.000But as far as driving down the street and listening to content, there's some pretty good bits.
00:04:44.000Like, do you ever hear the time high-pitched Eric was duped into going on a white power show?
00:04:49.000So, they just had another studio in Sirius, maybe they put up a Nazi poster or something, and they told him that he's on a, uh, they got him on a show, it's a white power show, um, and to try to knock the, rock the boat, because they could be, uh,
00:05:31.000I saw this tweet, we know the whole story with Louis, right?
00:05:33.000So he would do that, he'd masturbate in front of a woman, consensually.
00:05:38.000I don't consider that rape, I consider that tacky.
00:05:40.000And then these two girls, I don't know, ten years later, they come out during the whole Me Too thing, and they go, he was beating off.
00:05:47.000And because he's kind of an idol of ours, we felt compelled to stand there.
00:05:54.000That is the loosest case for rape I've ever heard in my life.
00:05:59.000I didn't object to you sexually assaulting me because I think you're cool.
00:06:04.000So that's why I stood there and said, okay.
00:06:08.000For guys, gay guys, that's a great thing about living in New York City too, is you hear all these stories and you go, yeah, I've been around homos a lot.
00:06:16.000And when, and they often say shit like that.
00:06:18.000And even when you look up to them, you go, yeah, no, we're not doing that.
00:06:43.000Don't get me wrong, but it's perfectly legal and consensual and not really worth $35,000,000.
00:06:50.000You know, remember there was that family where their son was on a water slide, this is within the past year, and he was hurling down and it was badly designed anyway, it decapitated their son.
00:07:03.000I want to throw up just saying that out loud.
00:07:21.000And I'm looking at the comments, and I, you know what, I'm 48, I gotta get off of these, um, cause I'm looking at the brains of 20 year olds, I'm looking at the brains of kids, and maybe I was that stupid when I was that age, but they're all like, cry me a river, oh poor baby, ooh, and then there's all these gifs of the world's tiniest violin,
00:07:39.000And I think it's because the less you've accomplished, the more you trivialize other people's accomplishments.
00:07:47.000I am not a big, like, I can separate politics.
00:07:50.000Like, with the Howard Stern thing, I'm pissed that he threw Alex Jones under the bus, and I thought that was a real hypocritical thing for him to do, but I can still enjoy the show.
00:07:57.000With Louis C.K., I'm pissed that he glorified his divorce.
00:08:00.000He had this whole bit where he said, you should never go up to someone and say, sorry to hear about your divorce.
00:08:04.000If they got divorced, they just got out of a terrible marriage.
00:08:59.000Let me give you another analogy for that.
00:09:01.000Say there's a date that you go on, and you took her to the movies, you took her to a beautiful dinner, you weren't too handsy, you politely walked her home, and she had a terrible time, and you were talking the whole time, and you wanted to hear about her, you didn't just talk about yourself, which is very rare in New York City.
00:09:16.000Every time I overhear dates in New York, I just hear people, men talking about themselves.
00:10:49.000Or maybe that was on that Seinfeld show, Comedians in Cars, or maybe it was both.
00:10:53.000But I was watching it, and it was so good that I felt cool being part of the generation that listens to Louis C.K.
00:11:03.000You know a comedian is good when he makes you cool for being live in that era.
00:11:09.000Like, Baby Boomer, I remember listening to it and thinking, alright Boomers, you got Richard Pryor, alright super old Boomers, you got Bill Cosby, who ruined it, so you don't even get that anymore.
00:11:20.000But I was kinda jealous of Richard Pryor, the Richard Pryors, and we kinda had, Gen X, we kinda had Eddie Murphy, but we still get Louis C.K.
00:12:00.000I don't know why I thought that was so fucking hilarious.
00:12:01.000I guess because it was a pro-life joke, and I'm not necessarily trying to get political here, but it's just nice to hear a comedian say something that's not perfectly in line with the narrative.
00:13:45.000So, the idea that it was an ape joke is kind of a stretch.
00:13:51.000And also, she dresses kind of weird, as all politicians do, like Hillary always looks like she's some sort of bureaucrat from Star Trek.
00:14:01.000And Valerie Jarrett has that same sort of like cloaks and stuff and long lines like some sort of authoritarian from the 70s show Logan's Run.
00:16:08.000I'm sure a lot of people would, it would be a tough call for them.
00:16:12.000Especially younger people who've never fucking done anything in their lives.
00:16:18.000And, you know, however you feel about it,
00:16:22.000The idea that you just sort of shrug it off, you're going to be there too, you know.
00:16:24.000You're going to make some sort of mistake.
00:16:27.000I was doing this thing, we were at a bar the other day with some friends and we were just scrolling through our phones and we would just scroll through people and then hit a name.
00:17:08.000He was a director, I think, that worked with Spike Jonze.
00:17:11.000Anyway, I don't know any of these people.
00:17:13.000But you go to your recents, and you go through your recent calls, and I guarantee you, pretty much everyone there, uh, has some sort of PC moment where everything seemed like it was over.
00:17:26.000Like even just on my phone here, Trace Crutchfield.
00:17:29.000Very liberal guy, actually maybe a socialist dude.
00:18:49.000And that's just me glancing at my phone right now.
00:18:50.000So, all you people with the little violin laughing at Roseanne and Louie, who are far more accomplished than you'll ever be, I promise you that, show a little reverence, maybe?
00:20:49.000So that second part where it's just like this atmosphere of sexuality and I remember getting in trouble because a long time ago there was this guy we were working with and this is when Vice was owned by a corporate.
00:21:01.000Just been taken over by this big corporate thing right after we moved to New York and we had this buyer because we were doing online selling.
00:21:59.000You know, I grew up in the 70s and the 80s, where you just talk about what a fat pig your friend is and then hold his fat and go, look at how fucking fat you are.
00:22:08.000Or my whole life with my weak chin, all my friends would be like, you're just a worm.
00:23:11.000And by the way, speaking of Roman Polanski, you know that Led Zeppelin and David Bowie and Keith Moon from The Who, they were all fucking the same 14-year-old girl?
00:23:44.000If we had so much reverence for marriage that people would get up and go, yeah he's a funny comedian but I, sorry, when he's up there I just think about how he likes his divorce and I think about his two daughters and it pisses me off.
00:23:57.000But no, it's he masturbated in front of someone who said they were okay with it, but then later said they felt like they should say that because he's a famous guy.
00:24:25.000Like at Rebel, I used to do, and I'd do it at other jobs, I would do this thing where I'd undo my pants, like undo my belt and my pocket, I mean my front button, and then I'd walk and then let my pants fall down and go, God damn it, and pretend I was super embarrassed, and I'd go, this fucking belt!
00:24:41.000It wasn't like a sexual thing where I'd pull down my pants and go, you like that?
00:24:45.000It was like a Jim Carrey kind of a... There's actually a British sitcom called Some Mothers Do Have Em with this character Frank who is a bumbling clown.
00:24:59.000I think I told you about it before at Fox News.
00:25:02.000I was getting a microphone put up my shirt and the thing I like to do to makeup artists and sound people is pretend they're hurting me because they're an inch from your face so they're very easy to scare.
00:25:11.000So when they come up with like some sort of foundation I just go
00:26:37.000I actually can now think of some scenarios, but to say them on this microphone would be so queer.
00:26:45.000So, joking around, even if there's a slight sexual connotation, as long as you're not trying to seduce the person, that should be off the books.
00:26:53.000Okay, so now we're getting into quid pro quo.
00:26:59.000If you blow me, you get a raise, or you'll do better.
00:27:04.000Now, my gut says that should be illegal, right?
00:27:10.000But I read an article once that said, how about nothing?
00:27:14.000How about, obviously there's assault laws that we have in the books, and if you grab a woman's ass at work, same as you grab a woman's ass on the street.
00:27:50.000But that's the only thing I can do to fantasize.
00:27:52.000And then I, you know, I did that other podcast where I talked about when women did have more power than us, like when I started the magazine, and all the marketing women, all the marketing people who could sell us the ads were women, and they had power over us, and they ended up sleeping with us.
00:28:07.000Now, it's different an old cougar making a young man have sex with her than some old Harvey Weinstein.
00:28:13.000Making some pretty young girl have sex with him.
00:28:18.000But sometimes I wonder if the whole idea of sexual harassment, and I had to sleep with him for this role, should just be eradicated.
00:28:26.000And we should just stick with the law.
00:28:28.000And that also goes for the idea of, you know, demanding money for it.
00:28:34.000I guess I've already talked about this a bunch, so I'm repeating myself.
00:28:40.000Like, I just feel that with the law, we went back to the Magna Carta, and we had tons of trial and error.
00:28:48.000Right up until, I mean, we only let women vote very recently.
00:28:50.000We've been trying things, and changing them, and making addendums, and that's why we have all these precedent-setting cases in a court of law.
00:28:57.000Because we go, well, actually this was the precedent-setting case.
00:29:00.000When you say something is a precedent-setting case, you're really talking about thousands of years.
00:29:05.000You're saying, yeah, we tried this, this, this, this, this, and this, and we got to here.
00:29:10.000And I'm starting to think these social justice warriors don't like justice.
00:29:14.000Because, like, take Mattress Girl, for example.
00:29:18.000I think what happened there was she was having doggy-style sex, and it went into the poop hole.
00:29:24.000And she said no, and maybe he went a couple pumps more than he should have, or maybe he took it out right away.
00:31:30.000But this chick, Mattress Girl, she was still in the tarnished phase of growing up with psychiatrists.
00:31:35.000And what psychiatrists do is they make you drug addicts when you're a kid.
00:31:39.000There's this thing going on at my kid's school where if kids are too rambunctious, which is always boys, then they get punished with their grades.
00:34:26.000And they look, and they go, okay, let's start going through it.
00:34:28.000First of all, let's check all the correspondence, all your social media, let's get your computer out, let's see all your DMs, blah blah blah, let's see your texts.
00:34:46.000This is the story I believe the way it went.
00:34:48.000I am very sure that the fuck me in the ass, I'm not positive where it went, but I am very sure that she was sending him flirtatious texts after the alleged rape.
00:34:57.000Now, I've never been raped, but I'm guessing you're not big on texting the guy afterwards, no?
00:35:03.000And I was told that the cops said, just get the fuck out of here or you're going to be facing some serious criminal charges.
00:35:09.000I don't think cops like busting fake rape allegations because they don't want to discourage future women from coming forward, so I think a lot of women get away with it.
00:35:17.000And so instead of her going, woo, that's playing with fire, she goes, alright, I'll just use the kangaroo courts of school.
00:35:25.000And so she goes to school and she ruins this guy's life.
00:37:16.000I mean, he was begging, begging them to take him to court because she started and then his other ex-girlfriend jumped in and said, yeah, me too, pretty much.
00:39:12.000So it takes a total monster douche psycho serial molester like Harvey Weinstein or serial rapist like Bill Cosby before the story really, you really get the truth.
00:39:23.000It has to be like one of the worst cases before the media gets it right.
00:39:29.000But everything else, buried to the back.
00:40:15.000If you get money and you take a five million dollar settlement, then, and promise never to talk about it, well then you're letting him do it to the next person.
00:40:25.000So Asia Argento is on this Me Too thing, which I honestly don't get.
00:40:27.000I don't get how you just don't go to the cops and you just... The idea of wanting sympathy because you slept with someone for a movie role.
00:40:34.000I mean, you're part of that whole... You're part of the whole disgusting system, Hollywood.
00:40:39.000You self-righteous pigs who tell the flyover states that they're a bunch of disgusting losers and you tell Trump supporters that they're garbage.
00:40:50.000And, uh, so she's part of the Me Too thing, and then we find out... Wait a minute, didn't Anthony Bourdain kill himself just days after you were photographed with his best friend?
00:41:16.000It's like that rumor, rumor, that, uh, I said it twice there to just be double clear so I don't get sued, but that rumor that Pete Davidson texted, um, I was going to say Flat Mike, the guy who did that, um, Donald Trump song.
00:41:34.000Ariana Grande's ex-boyfriend, Matt Mike, is his name.
00:41:49.000I'm turning into Ron White, where I have to stop the comedy show to look up the word.
00:41:54.000The rumor is that Pete Davidson texted, uh, I had to turn and look at his name again, Mac Miller, because, um, and said, I'm dating Ariana Grande, dude.
00:42:03.000And then he killed himself right after.
00:42:06.000But with the Anthony Bourdain thing, it's much more solid.
00:42:09.000And then it comes out that Aja Argento was, what, molesting some 17-year-old boy or 16-year-old boy, and she forced, she was forced to pay him off so he wouldn't talk about it.
00:42:19.000And she goes, actually, Anthony Bourdain
00:43:33.000You just get to sit there and have sex with the bride on the night of her wedding, then she jumps off the building because she feels so horrible about it?
00:43:42.000Ladies, if someone says something inappropriate at work, get over it.
00:43:47.000If someone touches you at work, then call the cops.
00:44:06.000You just had really gross, lame, consensual sex.
00:44:11.000And the person who did that really gross consensual sex should not have to lose 35 million dollars.
00:44:17.000If that makes you want to play the smallest violin in the world, why don't you try earning some of your own cash and see how long it takes to get to the big 3-5-0-0-0-0-0-0?
00:44:25.000Goodbye, I like you more than a friend.
00:44:32.000It's hard to be stuck in the car for an hour, much less weeks at a time, but sadly many families right here in our community call their cars home.
00:44:41.000Wouldn't it be nice to help them find an apartment instead, or a bed, or even a shower?