Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - October 30, 2018


Get Off My Lawn Podcast #93 | What’s going on with sex these days?

Topics
raunchy millennial sex divorce and culture of sex
Hosted by
Gavin McInnes
Mentioned
Jimi Hendrix Sean Hannity Jon Stewart Purple Trump Jordan McInnes Robin Williams Fufun Electric Johnny Hendricks Steven Crowder Miles McInnes Tom Shalhoub Jesus Christ Howard Stern Eating Pussy Jesus Lord Hey Tinder Alex Jones Sean King Chumbawamba and 15 more
Ep 202 | Slain For Their Faith | Get Off My Lawn Ep 204 | Whitey Whacked | Get Off My Lawn

Episode Stats


Length

38 minutes

Words per minute

173.58

Word count

6,729

Sentence count

603

Harmful content

Misogyny

37

sentences flagged

Toxicity

209

sentences flagged

Hate speech

41

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

Comedian and actor John Hamm joins Jemele to discuss the perils of sex in marriage, and why he doesn t want to have sex with his wife. Plus, he talks about a recent movie he did in Times Square, and how he feels about his wife's weight gain. And why he thinks she's a "big fat pig." And how he thinks his wife is a "chunky pig." And why his wife doesn't want him to get a tattoo of a guy's name on her butt. And what's the worst thing he's ever done to his wife? Oh, and he also talks about how he's going to get revenge on his wife for being a big fat pig, because he's not sure she wants him to have a baby, because she's not getting any more than she already has. The rest is history, folks, and we're going to talk about it. Logo by Courtney DeKorte. Theme by Mavus White. Music by PSOVOD and tyops. This episode was produced and edited by David Fincher. Additional music by Jeff Kaale and Mark Phillips. It was mixed by Patrick Muldowney. If you liked this episode, please leave us a rating and review on Apple Podcasts! and a review on iTunes. Thank you so much for all your support, it really means a lot to us and we really appreciate it. We really appreciate all the support we've gotten from you. Thank you for all the people who've been listening, supporting us. -Merry Christmas and supporting us, everyone! -Jemele and I hope you enjoy this episode and all the love you're listening to this episode. XOXO -Podcasts by John Hamm and we'll see you in the next episode of Gimlet Media and all of your support and support us in the future with a new episode of this podcast. . -Jon Sorrentino - Thank you, Jon Taffer (and we'll send you back next week for all of the love and support you can see it on social media and all that's going out to the rest of the world. and we appreciate you all of you're being awesome, Jon's words of support and love you'll hear you back in the airwaves, too much love, all of that's good vibes and all good things.

Transcript

Transcripts from "Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes" are sourced from the Knowledge Fight Interactive Search Tool. Explore them interactively here.
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
Topics generated with Qwen2.5-3B-Instruct.
Hosts, guests, and mentioned names generated with spaCy (en_core_web_sm), reconciled against Wikidata.
00:00:00.000 What's going on with sex these days?
00:00:04.000 What's it like?
00:00:05.000 I mean, I know what sex is like. 0.77
00:00:06.000 I'm not going to talk about the sex I have with my wife.
00:00:11.000 Suffice to say, the trope about how, why would you want to have a cheeseburger every night for the rest of your life when you could have different food every night?
00:00:20.000 That's the sort of bachelor's retort against marriage.
00:00:25.000 It's not like that.
00:00:26.000 Tom Shalhoub summed it up well. 0.98
00:00:27.000 He goes, it's not fucking cheeseburger. 0.98
00:00:30.000 It's the same kitchen every night. 0.98
00:00:34.000 So you look at the kitchen and you stroke your beer and you go, what about a prosciutto tonight?
00:00:40.000 Not even a meal, just an appetizer.
00:00:43.000 That kind of thing.
00:00:45.000 So, single people try to tell you sex with marriage is mundane.
00:00:48.000 That's a lie. 0.99
00:00:50.000 Also, another lie about marriage sex is that it's, you get lesbian bed death, LBD, as soon as you're married. 0.99
00:00:58.000 That's true when you have kids, simply because you can't facilitate it because there's a bunch of toddlers in your bed. 0.62
00:01:06.000 You gotta follow the dad on Instagram, by the way, because he has a great parody of paranormal activity, but it's not about a monster or a ghost coming into your room at night, it's your four-year-old.
00:01:20.000 And then once the kids get older and get independent and sort of leave you alone, the sex goes back up again.
00:01:27.000 It's like my friend Fred from Brooklyn said, he goes, Been married 40 years.
00:01:33.000 I'd love to eat her out right now. 1.00
00:01:35.000 That was at an Anthony Cumia party, and she was like 10 feet away.
00:01:40.000 And she looked great.
00:01:41.000 I don't know how old she is.
00:01:43.000 Well, if he said 40 years, she can't be, she must be around 60.
00:01:47.000 Maybe he said 30 years?
00:01:49.000 Anyway, it was a big number.
00:01:51.000 And you know, she kept herself pretty and still wore high heels and all that stuff. 1.00
00:01:55.000 I'm making her sound super old, fuck. 1.00
00:01:56.000 Every time you try to compliment a woman, you dig a deeper hole. 1.00
00:02:11.000 One time I did this documentary called A Million in the Morning, and it was about the movie-watching world championships.
00:02:19.000 I don't know if it's available anywhere, like most of my movies, but we sat with people while they watched movies for five days, I think, is the world record.
00:02:29.000 And it was really hard to do because
00:02:33.000 They're just watching a movie.
00:02:34.000 They can't talk to you.
00:02:34.000 If they look away from the movie, they lose the competition.
00:02:36.000 So it was mostly just me ranting.
00:02:39.000 And yeah, I did have a couple of drinks during that documentary.
00:02:42.000 It was five days in Times Square.
00:02:43.000 It was very enlightening, though. 1.00
00:02:48.000 Times Square is a fucking hellhole at night. 1.00
00:02:51.000 It's tourism. 1.00
00:02:52.000 You can walk around made of money.
00:02:53.000 You can glue money all over your body and walk around Times Square at noon and it's like you're in Disneyland.
00:02:59.000 Literally like you're in Disneyland.
00:03:01.000 But at two in the morning it is the the freaks come out at night.
00:03:05.000 It's just bombs.
00:03:06.000 Zombies walk in the streets. 1.00
00:03:08.000 It's fucking creepy, man. 0.99
00:03:10.000 I don't think it's as dangerous per se as it was in, you know, the classic 80s New York. 0.99
00:03:15.000 But it's just sad and decrepit.
00:03:16.000 But anyway, one of the women was a slightly chunky lady. 1.00
00:03:20.000 And everyone loses their mind when they don't sleep. 0.99
00:03:23.000 And she fucking... We were close. 1.00
00:03:25.000 We were joking around. 1.00
00:03:26.000 And she lost it at the very end of the movie.
00:03:30.000 And all my flirtations, my jokey flirtations, like, we should get married or something like that, became sarcastic in her mind.
00:03:39.000 And I was mocking her.
00:03:41.000 And so, after three days of getting along with her great, she sort of rewrote the whole three days, and it was all a big, you know, sarcastic joke. 0.99
00:03:52.000 And I was actually mocking her, and this whole documentary was about her being a big fat pig. 1.00
00:03:59.000 So I said, um... Uh-oh. 0.99
00:04:02.000 Got something going on downstairs.
00:04:06.000 Dogs make good alarms, I gotta say.
00:04:08.000 I know he's pretty worthless, but... And it's always the post office.
00:04:14.000 Postman. 0.52
00:04:15.000 He's obsessed with the postman.
00:04:18.000 That trope is accurate. 1.00
00:04:21.000 Not even like UPS.
00:04:23.000 FedEx he doesn't mind.
00:04:25.000 Post- I don't know.
00:04:27.000 What are you supposed to call them now?
00:04:28.000 Postal workers?
00:04:29.000 Postal workers?
00:04:30.000 Bad news.
00:04:31.000 Anyway.
00:04:33.000 While she was crying, I said, I don't- I think you have this all wrong.
00:04:39.000 I said, you should see my wife.
00:04:41.000 And I implied that my wife was as big as her, which is, I think she was like 250 pounds. 1.00
00:04:48.000 So I lied.
00:04:49.000 And I said, my wife is, whatever the politically correct term is, like, heavyset. 0.99
00:04:56.000 And that totally diffused it instantly and like she sort of shook it off and was normal after that.
00:05:00.000 But again, you're just walking on eggshells with women, especially when they're drunk. 1.00
00:05:06.000 But that's not what I want to talk about. 0.93
00:05:09.000 So yeah, sex with marriage is fine. 1.00
00:05:10.000 Shut the fuck up. 1.00
00:05:11.000 It's none of your beeswax. 1.00
00:05:13.000 And shut the fuck up, Leroy. 1.00
00:05:16.000 He's still barking. 1.00
00:05:17.000 They're gone.
00:05:19.000 This is like post-bark? 0.87
00:05:22.000 You're mad that someone from the post office has ever been here? 0.99
00:05:27.000 I was talking to a friend of mine's sister and uh she told me that I'm giving you this news source so you know that you don't necessarily have to take it to the bank but she told me there's a thing with millennial women now where they have a real problem with distended anuses like anal whatever you call it like when your anal anus is destroyed I bet old gays get it but young girls are getting it because sex with millennials now is straight to porn 0.99
00:05:59.000 And that's pretty sad. 0.99
00:06:02.000 Sex should be pretty normal. 0.72
00:06:06.000 It should be kind of uncool until you're 25. 0.88
00:06:13.000 Sex should be, say you're 15, 16, and you're sort of sitting on the floor. 0.94
00:06:19.000 I remember there was, when we were teenagers, maybe 14, we heard that this guy, Trevor, in our school, he sat on a basement floor with his girlfriend, and they took their shirts off, and they just sort of touched each other, touched each other's areas, not in a passionate way, just sort of almost like a curious way. 0.98
00:06:36.000 And we all thought that was so funny and ha ha ha, what a loser.
00:06:40.000 And I look back at it now and I think, how sweet. 0.98
00:06:44.000 How innocent, how pure.
00:06:45.000 That, you know, there was no teen pregnancy going on in that scenario.
00:06:49.000 It was just two people who had attractions to each other, carefully moving forward.
00:06:54.000 That's what sex should be. 1.00
00:06:57.000 And ladies, being a whore, having a slut walk, that's not good for you. 1.00
00:07:03.000 You don't understand that the whole, like, I'm a slut, I'm empowered. 1.00
00:07:09.000 Don't you see that that only benefits men? 1.00
00:07:12.000 There's this myth that women love being sluts. 1.00
00:07:15.000 Yeah, I'm a total slut. 1.00
00:07:17.000 I was so wasted. 1.00
00:07:18.000 I fucked that dude. 1.00
00:07:20.000 Nah. 0.99
00:07:22.000 I would argue that none of us are like that. 0.91
00:07:24.000 Even dudes, I mean, outside of rock stars or whatever, but even dudes who are fucking lots of chicks, I think even that night as they crawl into bed, they're sort of thinking, this could be something serious. 0.92
00:07:35.000 This could go places. 0.97
00:07:36.000 She could be the one.
00:07:37.000 You never know. 1.00
00:07:39.000 What about guys who fuck prostitutes? 1.00
00:07:42.000 Yeah, that's a strong point. 1.00
00:07:44.000 I don't quite get that. 1.00
00:07:45.000 Because when you have sex with a prostitute, all deals are off the table. 0.96
00:07:50.000 Like even strippers, I've known a few guys that fell in love with strippers and it actually worked and some of them got married. 0.98
00:07:57.000 There's hope there.
00:07:58.000 Like this is just an adult dancer.
00:07:59.000 I actually did another podcast where I said it's kind of not even wrong.
00:08:05.000 It's kind of beautiful in a way.
00:08:08.000 I know it sounds just like prostitution to you, but I think I could make a good case that they're very different things. 0.73
00:08:14.000 Prostitution is sad and disgusting and you're taking the most sacred thing you have and just monetizing it. 0.67
00:08:20.000 And that's all a woman, I shouldn't say that's all a woman has, but it's a woman's most sacred treasure. 0.98
00:08:26.000 The dude, it's not quite as sacred.
00:08:31.000 But to sell that is just like, that's the end of the line.
00:08:34.000 You know, that's like a minstrel show. 0.94
00:08:36.000 That's like a black guy going, oh well. 1.00
00:08:40.000 No one seems to want me to do anything else. 0.77
00:08:41.000 I guess I'll put on big white lips and some white gloves and go, hello my baby!
00:08:46.000 You know what that reminded me of?
00:08:47.000 I was in Taiwan, and I went to some water show where they had like an orca whale or something. 0.99
00:08:54.000 I had one family I was teaching and we got along great, even though their English sucked shit, thanks to me being a crappy teacher. 0.94
00:09:02.000 But we'd go on things together, and you know, mime and stuff. 0.97
00:09:06.000 I want shoujin choufan.
00:09:10.000 They took me to one thing where it was two dogs and and they were it was a statue two porcelain black porcelain dogs side by side and they were on a beach by the water and everyone was praying to them and touching them and trying to be part of them and I said what's what were these dogs and they said it was two dogs
00:09:32.000 The sailors went out on a fishing boat around here.
00:09:36.000 We're in like Kaohsiung, I guess.
00:09:39.000 Which I guess is south bottom of Taiwan?
00:09:41.000 I forget. 1.00
00:09:43.000 The cities in Taiwan are fucking disgusting. 1.00
00:09:45.000 They're just Chinese like every other Chinese city. 1.00
00:09:47.000 It's just soot and people crammed together, but rural Taiwan is breathtaking. 0.97
00:09:53.000 So this was pretty rural.
00:09:57.000 They said that the dogs were waiting for the fishing boat, but the fishing boat, uh, capsized.
00:10:02.000 I was gonna say drowned.
00:10:04.000 Something about these podcasts, like, you're smarter in other ways, and you'll come up with words that you hadn't said in a while, like pulchritudinous, but then also, at the same time, there's a hole in your brain where you won't remember your dad's name.
00:10:18.000 Jordan McInnes?
00:10:19.000 What's my dad's name?
00:10:21.000 And I just forgot the word for when a boat sinks.
00:10:24.000 Anyway, it's sinkted.
00:10:26.000 And, um, the dogs stayed on the beach until they died of starvation.
00:10:30.000 And so there's a beautiful statue to them. 0.99
00:10:32.000 By the way, I want you to, as you get older, you should always have in the back of your head, that could be bullshit. 0.96
00:10:39.000 Not that I'm lying now, I'm telling you 100% the truth. 0.99
00:10:41.000 But it could be bullshit about those dogs. 0.99
00:10:43.000 Those dogs could have, like, had mange. 0.99
00:10:45.000 I know there's a dog in Scotland where they say it's a famous pub.
00:10:50.000 I think it's in Glasgow?
00:10:51.000 Maybe Edinburgh.
00:10:52.000 Where the owner was sick and died and the dog stayed outside the pub until it died of starvation.
00:10:57.000 They made a statue of it and it's a big tourist attraction.
00:10:59.000 Everyone goes to that pub.
00:11:00.000 It's all a lie.
00:11:02.000 Scottish people are like the Irish. 1.00
00:11:03.000 They love to fucking pump up a story. 1.00
00:11:06.000 The dog did not wait there till it died. 0.99
00:11:07.000 So maybe that's where my...
00:11:08.000 My, um, skepticism comes from. 0.99
00:11:11.000 But every time you hear something that seems awesome and too perfect, just go, or possibly that's all bullshit. 0.81
00:11:22.000 Anyway, um, they're all rubbing it and praying it, praying on it and stuff. 0.83
00:11:26.000 And I said to my hosts, what are they saying?
00:11:28.000 Because I don't speak Mandarin.
00:11:30.000 And he said, uh, they're all asking for stuff.
00:11:34.000 They want, this guy wants a Mercedes Benz.
00:11:36.000 This guy wants a dryer.
00:11:38.000 So it was basically that Oprah thing, the, the secret, you know, where you go, I want a Mercedes Benz.
00:11:43.000 I want a Mercedes Benz.
00:11:43.000 You think about it nonstop and eventually you get a Mercedes Benz.
00:11:47.000 I think there's some truth to both of those, and I think they're both linked to Christianity.
00:11:52.000 Like when you pray that your friend doesn't go to prison, and you pray and you pray and you pray to God,
00:12:01.000 I could almost make an atheist argument for the effectiveness of that.
00:12:04.000 Because it puts it in your frontal lobe.
00:12:07.000 And you're thinking about it more.
00:12:09.000 And you're like, well, who's his lawyer?
00:12:11.000 And then you think, can he afford a lawyer?
00:12:13.000 I gotta get him some money for a lawyer.
00:12:16.000 And then, is this lawyer incompetent?
00:12:17.000 Maybe we should fire this lawyer. 0.94
00:12:19.000 Praying puts your problem in your frontal lobe.
00:12:23.000 It also sort of prioritizes what you want.
00:12:26.000 So say you're shallow and you just want a Mercedes Benz. 0.99
00:12:28.000 You don't give a shit about anyone going to prison. 0.99
00:12:30.000 Okay. 0.99
00:12:32.000 I mean, the reason Mercedes-Benz exists is because it's an acquirable goal.
00:12:37.000 There's not a lot of $50 million yachts.
00:12:40.000 In fact, I think Robin Williams had a lot of trouble selling his $100 million ranch because no one has $100 million.
00:12:47.000 But a Mercedes you can afford.
00:12:49.000 So it's believable.
00:12:50.000 Anyway, Jesus.
00:12:51.000 Tangent police. 0.87
00:12:54.000 So we go back to the water park and there's a black dude there.
00:12:57.000 And he's American.
00:12:59.000 And he was doing this sort of like the... 0.98
00:13:05.000 The, um, orca whale, whatever, would come out of the water, the killer whale, and they'd feed it fish and stuff, and you could stand on its nose, and then you could do a flip and all that stuff, so they had all the Chinese guys doing regular stuff, but there was this patsy, this fall guy, and it was an American black dude, and he was, like, slippin' on banana peels, and he fell in the water, and I'm a dumb black dude! 0.96
00:13:29.000 And, um, 0.98
00:13:32.000 Um, he was being a buffoon. 0.97
00:13:35.000 And, to be honest, at 48 today, I think I would just see him and go, whatever dude, you're paying the bills. 0.98
00:13:41.000 None of my beeswax.
00:13:42.000 We're in Taiwan. 0.88
00:13:43.000 It's not like you're hurting black people with these stereotypes. 0.96
00:13:46.000 Enjoy yourself. 0.89
00:13:47.000 Want to go get a beer?
00:13:48.000 I'd like to speak English for a change.
00:13:50.000 Or speak English without having to mime.
00:13:53.000 But, I was politically correct back then.
00:13:55.000 I was probably 20.
00:13:56.000 And, uh, I sort of had this shame. 0.98
00:14:01.000 How fucking shitty of me, by the way. 0.99
00:14:03.000 This guy's out there making a buck. 0.99
00:14:06.000 And I give him this look, which was like, what have you done?
00:14:09.000 I'm basically Sean King.
00:14:11.000 Like, yo, man, you let us brothers down, dawg.
00:14:14.000 Yo, what's up with that? 1.00
00:14:17.000 Amos and Andy shit, y'all. 0.99
00:14:18.000 I'm from Canada and Britain. 1.00
00:14:21.000 Yo, dawg, why you gotta act like a clown around them fishes, yo? 0.96
00:14:26.000 What you done to us, us peoples? 0.91
00:14:29.000 So I gave him this look and we met and I went, hey man, and he was obviously ashamed because he's aware of the trope, right?
00:14:36.000 So he's like, hey, uh, hi. 0.89
00:14:38.000 He should have punched me in the face. 0.98
00:14:42.000 You know another time? 0.99
00:14:44.000 I did that to a black man and he did punch me in the face. 1.00
00:14:48.000 This is how politically correct I was when I was 18. 1.00
00:14:51.000 Punk rocker at a punk bar, punk club called Fufun Electric, which means electric asshole. 0.98
00:14:58.000 It was in Montreal and it was like Studio 54, but punk. 0.99
00:15:02.000 So it was two floors, and there was barbed wire everywhere, and fucking cages, and punk rockers. 0.97
00:15:07.000 It was kind of like Disney punk. 0.98
00:15:09.000 It was a punk club.
00:15:11.000 People would dance.
00:15:12.000 They'd slam dance on the dance floor.
00:15:15.000 It's why I moved to Montreal, actually.
00:15:17.000 I moved to the house at 18.
00:15:18.000 I heard about a punk club in Montreal, and I was like, I need to be by the punk club.
00:15:23.000 So I went there.
00:15:25.000 And, uh, you know, it's... Hello?
00:15:34.000 It's a politically correct time.
00:15:39.000 Uh, we're talking about 1988 now.
00:15:41.000 It's the beginning of it all. 0.99
00:15:43.000 Really, it's when all this, like, you-can't-say-that shit started. 0.97
00:15:46.000 It died in the early 90s and then came back in the late 90s, but right in, like, 87 to 90, it was a big deal. 0.96
00:15:54.000 So anyway, this band was playing 24-7 Spies.
00:15:57.000 They're kinda good.
00:15:58.000 And this was a weird sort of Red Hot Chili Peppers time.
00:16:01.000 Well, it's weird to say Red Hot Chili Peppers because they've never stopped, but it was like a funk punk
00:16:07.000 That's kind of getting into that.
00:16:08.000 I'm going to become an a cappella funk punk.
00:16:23.000 What happened to Gavin McInnes?
00:16:24.000 Oh, it's weird, dude. 0.98
00:16:26.000 He was getting hassled for being right-wing and shit, and he just quit his job. 0.98
00:16:29.000 He, uh, dyed his hair blonde, uh, shaved his beard, and he became an acapella funk punk. 0.99
00:16:35.000 And, uh, he's not very good.
00:16:37.000 So he does these shows, and he'll get paid, like, 80 bucks.
00:16:41.000 His wife, she doesn't really hang out with him anymore.
00:16:44.000 I mean, they're not divorced, but it's pretty sad, dude.
00:16:48.000 And some people go to his shows where he does this acapella funk punk. 0.99
00:16:52.000 I don't even want to tell you this, but they throw shit at him. 0.99
00:16:55.000 And he just keeps doing it. 0.99
00:16:57.000 I saw him do a whole set, and he had a tomato in his hair.
00:17:02.000 And he was like... And he just kept bobbing his head.
00:17:09.000 His hair is kind of long now.
00:17:11.000 Until the tomato just worked its way out.
00:17:14.000 And by the end of the show, it was just a little bit red.
00:17:16.000 So that's how much he was thrashing.
00:17:19.000 And then the other guy goes, what's acapella funk punk?
00:17:22.000 And the other guy goes, I don't know.
00:17:24.000 I Googled it and nothing came up.
00:17:27.000 Like that's a trillion possibilities and zero.
00:17:30.000 There's no acapella funk punks.
00:17:32.000 It's lots of acapella people, but they have like a team and they go,
00:17:40.000 One of the best acapella guys, actually, is kind of Gavin's mentor, and he's this dude who does Jimi Hendrix all the time.
00:17:46.000 You ever heard of him?
00:17:47.000 His name is Johnny Hendrix.
00:17:49.000 And he does... You should hear him do All Along the Watchtower.
00:17:51.000 It's spooky.
00:17:52.000 I mean, it's better than Jimi Hendrix. 0.96
00:17:54.000 I feel like if Jimi Hendrix came back from the grave, he'd go, Damn, man, that's really good. 0.97
00:17:59.000 You really nailed it, brother. 1.00
00:18:01.000 You know, I played the guitar for so long trying to make a sound, but when you do that shit with your mouth, it makes me want to light my guitar on fire again. 1.00
00:18:12.000 Light it up like Woodstock, you know what I'm saying? 1.00
00:18:14.000 Just like, forget about it.
00:18:18.000 My job's been done, you know what I'm saying?
00:18:20.000 Anyway, he would do along the watchtower like this.
00:18:23.000 He was that good.
00:18:40.000 So 24-7 Spies are playing that, and then they want to do- Fishbone were doing this thing at the time called a celebration of heterosexuality.
00:18:47.000 Which in my old age now, it sounds awesome.
00:18:49.000 You know?
00:18:50.000 Sure.
00:18:50.000 We got gay pride, how about straight pride?
00:18:52.000 But back then it was like, fuck that. 1.00
00:18:52.000 Sure. 1.00
00:18:54.000 I was basically Miles McInnes. 1.00
00:18:56.000 Fuck that. 1.00
00:18:57.000 It was like saying all lives matter means black lives don't matter. 1.00
00:19:00.000 So if you are pro-heterosexuality, it means you hate gays, basically. 0.98
00:19:02.000 That was my mentality. 0.99
00:19:04.000 So they go they go we want to bring all the woman on the stage This is fucking New Year's Eve by the way let the woman on the fucking stage Gavin So they're pulling women on stage, but this is a punk club Okay, this is not spring break. 0.98
00:19:17.000 I don't want woman on the stage being exploited so He posted on the stage this could have been could have been psychosomatic but I felt like some of them didn't want to be on the stage and in my mind they were being exploited and 0.99
00:19:31.000 I think they were just shy.
00:19:32.000 This is Quebec. 0.97
00:19:34.000 It's like an orgy Like people are it's like France. 1.00
00:19:37.000 They have the French mentality, so they're always one tits hanging out some guys Jerking off. 1.00
00:19:42.000 It's just it's a giant sex is nothing to them. 1.00
00:19:45.000 It's like going to the bathroom. 1.00
00:19:46.000 There's pooing peeing fucking so um 1.00
00:19:52.000 Uh, he's pulling people on the stage and they're dancing on the stage, and I get it in my head that this is bullshit, that this is exploitation, this is wrong. 0.99
00:20:00.000 So I wait by, after the show, I wait by the sort of, the door to the green room, and I just go, I'm giving them the finger, going... 1.00
00:20:08.000 You gotta fucking make women get naked and entertain us? 1.00
00:20:12.000 This isn't about women. 1.00
00:20:13.000 You wanna exploit women for New Year's Eve? 1.00
00:20:15.000 And I was probably not making very coherent sense.
00:20:17.000 Plus, it's a loud club with music blaring.
00:20:20.000 They're all sweaty.
00:20:20.000 These guys just played a set.
00:20:21.000 They're not looking for an intellectual debate. 0.99
00:20:24.000 And so two of them just walk by and go, what the fuck's that guy talking about? 1.00
00:20:28.000 And then the third guy was like, I just go, fuck you! 1.00
00:20:30.000 And he just goes, poof! 1.00
00:20:35.000 Just fucking nails me right in the face. 0.99
00:20:38.000 I think my head may have hit the wall behind me. 0.98
00:20:42.000 And, um... That's when I realized that your personal dogma might not apply to every single person in the world, and they might not want it shoved down their throat when they're trying to have fun.
00:20:56.000 Lesson learned!
00:20:59.000 But anyway, um... Believe it or not,
00:21:04.000 I remember what I'm talking about, and sex is your most sacred thing.
00:21:10.000 And I know a lot of dudes throw it around, but... And they definitely see it as less valuable than women, and I think that's perfectly natural, but I... It's not absolutely nothing to men.
00:21:21.000 Like, fucking a blow-up doll isn't funny, it's inexplicably sad. 0.99
00:21:26.000 I could make myself cry if I think about a guy fucking a blow-up doll or a sex robot, and it's not at a bachelor party, and it's not a joke. 1.00
00:21:33.000 Like, a guy making- I might tear up. 1.00
00:21:36.000 A guy making love to a- a, like, cyber-whatever-realistic sex doll. 0.93
00:21:45.000 Is there- There's not a lot of things sadder than that. 1.00
00:21:48.000 Poor fucking bastard, dude. 1.00
00:21:50.000 You've really completely given up on society. 1.00
00:21:54.000 Um.
00:21:56.000 So.
00:21:59.000 So, to get back to the ideal sex. 0.99
00:22:02.000 It should be awkward and uncomfortable.
00:22:04.000 For young teens, even normal teens, it should just be like exploration and weird and slow and it should be the opposite of porn. 1.00
00:22:16.000 You don't skull fuck your teenage girlfriend. 0.98
00:22:20.000 You'd like try stuff and get nervous and it's awkward and it doesn't last long and you could even joke later about how that wasn't great. 0.99
00:22:29.000 You know?
00:22:31.000 And then you get into your 20s, and you start maybe trying out some moves, right?
00:22:38.000 30s, all bets are off. 1.00
00:22:40.000 30s, you're a fucking animal. 1.00
00:22:40.000 I don't even want to see it. 1.00
00:22:41.000 Please, don't show it to me. 1.00
00:22:42.000 Jesus Christ, you people are disgusting. 0.99
00:22:44.000 Is that even legal? 1.00
00:22:46.000 How'd you get your leg over there?
00:22:49.000 And I think that's a very natural progression.
00:22:51.000 Oh my god, 50s?
00:22:53.000 Jesus Lord.
00:22:53.000 Can you imagine what they get up to?
00:22:55.000 They just go inside each other. 1.00
00:22:57.000 The man puts his head into the woman's vagina until he's 100% in her body. 1.00
00:23:03.000 And then he puts her legs in her legs and he wears her like a suit. 1.00
00:23:06.000 And then they squirt. 0.99
00:23:08.000 They each have 14 orgasms and then he...
00:23:13.000 Goes out again and they have a shower and never talk about it again. 0.96
00:23:18.000 But, I know this is a weird subject, but I just, I'm saddened by how raunchy millennial sex is. 0.99
00:23:25.000 And I talk to these people, and these dating apps happened after I got married, but I talk to these youngsters on it, and they just, like, some of the guys go, you know, I just got tired of being blown by sixes.
00:23:38.000 Oh, that's romantic.
00:23:40.000 Remember the graffiti I told you I saw in Tel Aviv?
00:23:43.000 It was translated to me. 0.99
00:23:45.000 It said in Hebrew, um... Hey Tinder, my dick is broken. 1.00
00:23:50.000 I want love. 0.99
00:23:51.000 I've talked about it a bunch on the show, so I'm sorry to bore you, but... My dick is broken in Israeli just means I've had enough. 0.99
00:23:57.000 And it's a perfect double entendre in that case, because... The guy was like, I'm good for fucking tons of chicks. 1.00
00:24:05.000 That's what I was saying to this bartender the other day. 0.99
00:24:07.000 Alright, guys.
00:24:07.000 You lost your virginity at what?
00:24:09.000 I mean, I was 17.
00:24:11.000 But, um... Some guys are like... I talk to Americans and they all seem to say 14.
00:24:16.000 Maybe that's living in New York, but... The norm number seems to be 14.
00:24:19.000 Especially with Hispanics. 0.99
00:24:21.000 It's crazy young. 0.99
00:24:22.000 Especially with black people. 1.00
00:24:24.000 When I hear, oh, you sucked my babysitter's tits when I was 8. 1.00
00:24:27.000 Uh, I think you got raped, dude. 1.00
00:24:30.000 I loved it. 0.99
00:24:31.000 Yeah, no, no, I don't think that matters.
00:24:35.000 Um...
00:24:37.000 But, uh, I think that, uh, I just had a brain fart. 0.97
00:24:43.000 I remember this article I read in the New York Times that talked about horrible things men have done sexually, and it was a bunch of, their faces were blurred, and it was like, I couldn't read the article, but it was like, we gang raped a chick, or we made fun of this girl, or we pulled up her dress and we saw it, or we fucked this girl and got her pregnant and we made fun of her when she was pregnant. 0.97
00:25:01.000 I assume, I don't know. 0.94
00:25:03.000 But I think there are a lot of stories like that.
00:25:05.000 And so you read that and you go, we live in a rape culture. 1.00
00:25:08.000 Men have always been evil.
00:25:10.000 Women have always been victims. 1.00
00:25:13.000 This is horrible.
00:25:13.000 And that kind of was my initial takeaway when I saw the article and sort of glanced what I could stomach.
00:25:20.000 But, um, I realized later, no, it's an epoch.
00:25:26.000 It's divorce.
00:25:28.000 When you talk to baby boomers about sex, even the cool ones that smoke a marijuana doobie once in a while, they don't talk about gangbangs. 0.99
00:25:39.000 They don't talk about the girl they raped. 0.99
00:25:41.000 They talk about this one, like Howard Stern talks about his parents, and he goes, yeah, I fingered another girl, but that was my second love was your mother. 0.97
00:25:51.000 I hate when he talks about his parents, by the way, and that imitation is infuriating.
00:25:55.000 But boomers, and I assume everyone before them, they had a pretty normal sex life. 0.95
00:25:59.000 They probably would have some heavy petting, as they called it, in the back of the rumble seat at the drive-in.
00:26:05.000 I was doing air quotes that whole time. 0.97
00:26:07.000 But then, you know, they eventually realized, I want to have a lot of sex, and you got to get married for that, so I'm going to marry this chick. 1.00
00:26:14.000 And these people who get married young, their marriages tend to do much better than people who marry late, because their habits form together.
00:26:20.000 Hey, Monday night's movie night.
00:26:23.000 You get two 40-year-olds with each other and they're like, Monday night's movie night.
00:26:25.000 No, my Monday night's mini-putt night. 1.00
00:26:27.000 Well, fuck you. 1.00
00:26:28.000 No, fuck you. 1.00
00:26:29.000 Next thing you know, they're in a different room watching different shows. 1.00
00:26:33.000 So... I think...
00:26:37.000 Like, I had a pretty- I had a very normal sex life.
00:26:40.000 Um, 17, I lost it, but I remember even- even then it was kind of, uh, enforced.
00:26:47.000 This is in my book, but there was a girl, Big- Big K, we'll call her, and we all lost our virginity to her. 0.99
00:26:53.000 I think she'd been molested by her dad.
00:26:55.000 And she went on to have five kids and then leave them to go pursue a career in crack. 1.00
00:27:00.000 I know, it's not a very middle-class story. 0.97
00:27:03.000 So, um, all the guys called me and they said, alright, Kimmy's ready, she wants to do it with you, and if you don't do it, we're gonna beat the shit out of you because you're 17 and you're the last one. 0.99
00:27:11.000 So I went over there and, um, we horsed around and we did it. 0.73
00:27:15.000 It did not last very long.
00:27:18.000 It was fantastic, though.
00:27:19.000 Um, but, you know, it was not pornographic.
00:27:25.000 And, uh, I think that one of the reasons sex has become so degraded is because relationships have been trivialized.
00:27:33.000 And I think the reason relationships have been trivialized is divorce.
00:27:38.000 So, divorce got big in 1980.
00:27:40.000 I remember it.
00:27:42.000 I remember all my dad's friends sleeping on the couch.
00:27:45.000 My parents are still together, by the way.
00:27:46.000 So are my wives.
00:27:47.000 So are my wives.
00:27:48.000 So are my wife's.
00:27:50.000 F. I don't- I only have one.
00:27:54.000 Um, but uh...
00:27:57.000 Yeah, I think these, these, we've totally, every time someone talks about divorce, they talk about, I felt good and I could have ramen noodles for dinner and whatever I wanted.
00:28:06.000 And then when I was with my kids, I would see them and I would be, my batteries are fully charged and I was happy to hang out with them and they were never getting on my nerves because I only saw them once a week, a week.
00:28:14.000 And you go, yeah, that sucks for them.
00:28:17.000 No one ever talks about what divorce does to kids.
00:28:19.000 It's always like I could finally buy a car, a convertible and I had a new girlfriend.
00:28:24.000 It was awesome.
00:28:27.000 I think not only does it pollute their minds and make them feel bad about, you know, the here and now, and I have less... I have half a dad, and now I have a new dad and a stepdad, and can he tell me when I have to go to bed?
00:28:38.000 Is he my boss now?
00:28:40.000 But it's also, it makes you think, well, why have a relationship?
00:28:43.000 I remember I was at my friend's in Britain, and they're like lefty, PC, old punkers. 0.85
00:28:50.000 And she was like, you know, you don't need a contract.
00:28:53.000 You don't need a piece of paper to say you love someone.
00:28:55.000 Why does the government have to sanctify it?
00:28:58.000 And then her niece, who was like 30, goes,
00:29:02.000 Yeah, I got a little disappointed.
00:29:03.000 I was talking to my girls.
00:29:04.000 I was talking to Jennifer and she said that, um, she'll never get married because, um, if it didn't work out with you and Dad, then why bother?
00:29:12.000 And I think it kind of put her off, you know?
00:29:15.000 And I thought, hey, what your niece just said contradicts what you just said. 0.99
00:29:19.000 Apparently the piece of paper matters.
00:29:20.000 Apparently marriage is important.
00:29:23.000 So I realized going back over this horrible article that it's not indicative of men and women and their relationships over time and you don't know that there's tons of rape going on.
00:29:36.000 That does have a semblance of truth but it's from 1980 till probably the 90s and it is a direct result of divorce.
00:29:47.000 Now the era we're in now is even worse in many ways.
00:29:50.000 Now it's like
00:29:52.000 Sex is so meaningless, sometimes the rape doesn't register.
00:29:57.000 For example, I was talking to, I forget her name, at Fox News.
00:30:03.000 She went and researched Spring Break in Florida, and Sean Hannity kept pushing it, and Jon Stewart made fun of him and said, oh, looks like Sean can't handle a party.
00:30:15.000 What's the matter, Sean?
00:30:16.000 You never been to Spring Break? 0.97
00:30:18.000 But Sean's point was, it's not a party anymore, it's a rape fest.
00:30:23.000 And what happens is these girls will do oxy, and they'll be dead to the world, and then these guys will quote-unquote run a train on them, where seven guys will be fornicating on the beach with this woman who's basically half alive on opioids, and then walk away laughing. 0.54
00:30:41.000 Haha, that was fun.
00:30:42.000 And everyone's dancing around them.
00:30:44.000 It happens all the time.
00:30:46.000 It's actually been banned now.
00:30:47.000 I forget.
00:30:47.000 I'm sorry.
00:30:47.000 I forget the exact town.
00:30:49.000 And there was like a shooting there.
00:30:51.000 Yeah, there was a shooting and someone died.
00:30:53.000 And then there was a gang rape that wasn't opioid related.
00:30:56.000 Not that opioid related rapes are good.
00:30:58.000 And Sean Hannity was vindicated.
00:31:01.000 Jon Stewart looked like the guy who was saying,
00:31:03.000 What's the matter, Sean?
00:31:03.000 You don't like a good shooting?
00:31:05.000 And a good gang rape? 1.00
00:31:07.000 But I talked to a woman who was talking to sheriffs down there, and she said, the sheriffs were saying, we're trying to prosecute these guys for rape, but the woman are like, whatever. 0.99
00:31:17.000 I guess I fucked up. 0.99
00:31:19.000 And they didn't see it as rape. 1.00
00:31:21.000 They were just like, whoops, I slipped.
00:31:24.000 I got a little too wasted on the vodoxyroxy.
00:31:29.000 And the 17 guys had a lot of fun, whoopsie doopsie.
00:31:33.000 Like, that's the kind of thing that traumatizes you for the rest of your life.
00:31:38.000 And they were just saying- they were treating it like nothing. 0.93
00:31:41.000 And I think it's- I- I- I think a lot of that has to do with divorce and this whole, like, slut culture thing. 0.97
00:31:47.000 Now, I know I sound like a hypocrite because I started Vice. 0.97
00:31:50.000 And we were a big part of that culture. 1.00
00:31:53.000 Fuckin' had to suck a dick- I wrote The Vice Guide to Eating Pussy. 1.00
00:31:59.000 But it wasn't, uh, totally debase yourself until you're a useless piece of garbage and let everyone walk all over you. 1.00
00:32:08.000 I wasn't quite going for that when I said enjoy sex. 1.00
00:32:13.000 And a lot of these older spinster feminists who run blogs, they have fallen into that trap. 1.00
00:32:19.000 And there they are, getting booty calls at four in the morning, old and alone.
00:32:24.000 And so that's the end of that sort of run, right?
00:32:27.000 It's just being a colostomy bag for someone else's excretions.
00:32:32.000 But the beginning of that is your teens and early twenties and pornography and these dating apps have just led to them having like the most, I will call it advanced.
00:32:44.000 I mean, I'm not saying it's evil to do crazy moves like that, but it's, it's basically the Olympics and these kids are doing Olympic sports and they're, they're getting,
00:32:54.000 Shredded. 0.96
00:32:55.000 By the way, this is just... I'm not in the sex scene.
00:32:58.000 So... This is just what I hear and do research.
00:33:02.000 You guys are out there.
00:33:03.000 You're younger than me. 0.77
00:33:05.000 Are any of you having normal sex and, like, hugging after? 0.54
00:33:07.000 Are there any spooners on the line? 1.00
00:33:11.000 We got anyone spooning tonight?
00:33:14.000 Hey, welcome to WKRX.
00:33:16.000 We got any spooners out there?
00:33:18.000 That'd be funny if the spooners were one of the gangs in the Warriors. 1.00
00:33:21.000 They go, we got the Baseball Furies chasing Warriors out of the Bronx.
00:33:25.000 Also, we got the spooners who can't really pursue anyone because they just, it's a co-ed gang where people spoon. 0.59
00:33:35.000 So it's a hug, it's a cuddle party.
00:33:37.000 It's a cuddle party.
00:33:38.000 Ryan.
00:33:42.000 34.
00:33:43.000 I gotta wrap it up.
00:33:47.000 My neighbors are terrorizing me for supporting Trump and, you know, the usual threatening me with coming to my home, sending news crews to my house, threatening candlelight vigils to stamp out hate, making my children feel unwelcome,
00:34:08.000 Putting signs on my lawn.
00:34:09.000 You know, that kind of regular neighborly stuff that you do when you're married to a vegan, liberal American Indian who voted for Hillary, but you dared to like Trump and you need to be punished for that.
00:34:21.000 That kind of normal stuff.
00:34:23.000 So, talking to police and detectives is taking up a lot of my time right now.
00:34:30.000 Especially when I'm trying to keep friends of mine out of jail.
00:34:32.000 So I'm a little preoccupied!
00:34:35.000 Little preoccupied!
00:34:37.000 Don't you worry your pretty little head about that.
00:34:39.000 You need to worry your pretty little head about sleeping.
00:34:43.000 That's what really defines health, you know.
00:34:46.000 You need eight hours, you need nine hours.
00:34:47.000 And you don't, you shouldn't be too drunk, too.
00:34:50.000 That's when you wake up at three in the morning with the horrors.
00:34:53.000 So one of the best ways to get a good night's sleep is, of course, with purple mattress.
00:34:59.000 The Purple Mattress will probably feel different than anything you've ever experienced because it uses this brand new material that was developed by an actual rocket scientist.
00:35:08.000 It was not like the memory foam I'm used to.
00:35:10.000 The Purple material feels very unique because it's both firm and soft at the same time, so it keeps everything supported while feeling really comfortable.
00:35:19.000 Plus, it's breathable, so it sleeps cool.
00:35:22.000 Who doesn't want to be cold at night?
00:35:23.000 If you like being hot at night, I have a bone to pick with you.
00:35:27.000 Purple's offering a 100-night risk-free trial, and if you're not fully satisfied, you can return your mattress for a full refund.
00:35:33.000 It's backed by a 10-year warranty with free shipping and returns.
00:35:36.000 You're going to love Purple.
00:35:38.000 And right now,
00:35:40.000 My listeners, you guys out there, will get a free purple pillow with the purchase of a mattress.
00:35:45.000 That's in addition to the great free gifts they're offering site-wide.
00:35:50.000 So just text G-A-V-I-N, that's my name Gavin, to 474747.
00:35:56.000 The only way to get this free pillow is to text Gavin to 474747.
00:36:00.000 That's G-A-V-I-N to 474747.
00:36:01.000 That's what's important here.
00:36:09.000 And you know what, even if you don't want a purple mattress, can you just buy one or do that text so the people who make this podcast happen can love me more?
00:36:21.000 Support me?
00:36:22.000 I'm not very good at that kind of stuff.
00:36:23.000 Like, Steven Crowder's great at the Mug Club stuff, and of course Alex Jones is great at all the pills and stuff, but I've never been a good salesman.
00:36:32.000 The way I've always made money in the past is I've just found a good salesman and said, can you come with me while we do this and you can do the talking about how to sell it?
00:36:41.000 Because when people say no to things I'm selling, I want to punch them because I get so pissed off.
00:36:46.000 That's a whole other episode.
00:36:47.000 I should have an entrepreneur episode.
00:36:51.000 Every business needs a hipster, a hacker, and a hustler. 1.00
00:36:55.000 I stole that, but it's very relevant.
00:36:58.000 The hipster is the guy who's obsessed with the culture and loves everything about whatever it is.
00:37:02.000 It could be cars.
00:37:03.000 You could be making, you know, hot rods, and he just loves the culture.
00:37:07.000 He's the one who knows what the latest things are, and he's just immersed in it.
00:37:11.000 He's almost autistic. 0.77
00:37:13.000 The hacker is the guy who gets all the technology of it all and can facilitate it, so it's great to do hot rods, but if you're getting expensive parts, and you're spending too much money, you've lost your net, and you're not making money, you're gonna shut down.
00:37:27.000 That's the hacker.
00:37:28.000 He makes sure everything works every day.
00:37:29.000 It could be as simple as your email and as complex as rack and pinion steering.
00:37:34.000 And then there's the hustler.
00:37:36.000 That's the salesman who goes out there.
00:37:38.000 It's a very unique talent.
00:37:39.000 These guys, they can get knocked down a hundred times like more than a Chumbawamba song and just come back and go, Hey, this is going to be a great project.
00:37:48.000 And they're not lying.
00:37:49.000 They're just incredibly optimistic.
00:37:52.000 And they get a lot of stigma thanks to used cars, salesmen, tropes of the 70s and 80s, but they've made me a ton of dough over the years, and even more dough for themselves. 0.89
00:38:02.000 So don't shit on Hustlers, they're a third of what you need to survive.
00:38:06.000 That'll probably, probably, probably, wow that's a tough word to say. 0.98
00:38:11.000 That will probably be next episode.
00:38:15.000 I like you more than a friend.
00:38:16.000 It's hard to be stuck in the car for an hour, much less weeks at a time.
00:38:21.000 But sadly, many families right here in our community call their cars home.
00:38:26.000 Wouldn't it be nice to help them find an apartment instead, or a bed, or even a shower?
00:38:31.000 Well, you can!
00:38:32.000 By giving to The Salvation Army, where every donation bites for good.
00:38:36.000 Visit SalvationArmy.ListenAndGive.org now to help fund housing assistance initiatives for our neighbors most in need.
00:38:44.000 That's SalvationArmy.ListenAndGive.org