Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - Get Off My Lawn Podcast #95

00:00:00.000 You need three things to get rich.

00:00:03.000 A hipster, a hacker, and a hustler.

00:00:08.000 I stole this from some Japanese dude, but it is very true.

00:00:13.000 And you can have some Venn diagram overlap with that.

00:00:17.000 I'm gonna try to tell you how to make money in this thing, even though I haven't really been an entrepreneur since my ad agency was shut down.

00:00:25.000 And that was like five, six years ago?

00:00:28.000 So it's like a married man giving you sex tips.

00:00:32.000 They're all a little out of date.

00:00:36.000 Like Ronnie Mund, you ever listen to Howard Stern?

00:00:38.000 Ronnie Mund has all his sex tips.

00:00:40.000 Oh yeah.

00:00:41.000 I gotta say, just as a little side note, I really don't like the way they all pile up on Ronnie Mund when you listen to Howard Stern.

00:00:50.000 Like, they're a lot less manly than him.

00:00:52.000 And he does this thing, it's called, like, Cannonball Run or something, Bubble Gum Run.

00:00:57.000 Jackass dudes do it, too.

00:00:59.000 Sometimes it's in Europe.

00:01:00.000 And you race from Zurich to Barcelona or something.

00:01:06.000 Totally illegal.

00:01:08.000 And super fun.

00:01:10.000 And they're just giving him all this shit about it, saying, It's so dangerous, and what are you, a little kid?

00:01:16.000 Racing cars is not for little kids.

00:01:19.000 And nor is breaking the law.

00:01:19.000 Okay?

00:01:22.000 They're having fun, being bad, being rebellious, being masculine, all those things that used to be normal American life.

00:01:29.000 You know, when I was a kid, men were almost too sexy.

00:01:34.000 Let me explain.

00:01:35.000 Let me explain.

00:01:37.000 Men's sexuality, masculinity, and women's, of course, too, but sexuality was so positive, I guess, and over the top and free, free love, right?

00:01:47.000 This blitz bled into the 80s.

00:01:50.000 And women would wear short shorts, and you'd catcall them, and you'd call her a fox and stuff, and women loved it.

00:01:57.000 But, one thing no one talks about is how sexual men were.

00:02:01.000 Like, you would wear shorts so short, your pockets would be sticking out of the bottoms of them.

00:02:08.000 And I remember as a kid, like an 11 year old and a 12 year old,

00:02:12.000 We would sort of subsume this culture.

00:02:15.000 And if I look at pictures of me and my friends when we were, you know, 10, 11, 12, 13, we looked like weird homosexual porn stars.

00:02:27.000 Like you'd wear cut-off muscle tees that only went to your ribs to show off your gorgeous pecs, or six-pack, whatever they're called.

00:02:34.000 Then you'd have the tiniest shorts with basically your balls hanging out, and then your pockets there.

00:02:38.000 You'd have tube socks with, like, Chuck Taylors or something.

00:02:42.000 And then your hair would look like Farrah Fawcett's.

00:02:45.000 Like, men would work hard on their hair.

00:02:46.000 Oh, and you also had a coral choker.

00:02:49.000 I don't know what- that must have come from someone on vacation, but that became the thing in 1983.

00:02:54.000 You'd have a coral choker around your neck, which I always- bug me.

00:02:57.000 I always thought that looked gay.

00:02:59.000 Like in the New York hardcore scene, Krishnakaur dudes would always wear these tight chokers around their neck.

00:03:03.000 It looks like an S&M thing.

00:03:06.000 Don't have something around your neck unless you're a whore.

00:03:09.000 But yeah, we would dress up like that.

00:03:11.000 And that's not a good thing.

00:03:13.000 Don't get me wrong.

00:03:14.000 But the good thing was, you know, with normal adult men, you could be a sexy dude.

00:03:19.000 And women were like, God, he's hot.

00:03:21.000 Look at his package.

00:03:23.000 We've kind of desexualized our culture.

00:03:28.000 You see this in movies, too.

00:03:29.000 You know, where the leading man used to be James Bond and stuff, and you'd have all these women.

00:03:34.000 And then, you'd have movies like The Terminator.

00:03:37.000 That's kind of a bad example, because he's a robot.

00:03:39.000 But these sort of sexless heroes, who the woman lusted, but he would just, like, go upstairs and be alone, and he was alone.

00:03:48.000 I'm a lone wolf.

00:03:49.000 I'm a loner, Dottie.

00:03:50.000 And he wasn't banging chicks.

00:03:52.000 That's feminism.

00:03:53.000 Feminism has ruined everything.

00:03:56.000 But yeah.

00:03:58.000 So you're getting sex tips from someone who has been out of the game for a while.

00:04:01.000 But I remember, you know, I've started quite a few businesses.

00:04:04.000 It wasn't just Vice.

00:04:06.000 I started Rooster.

00:04:09.000 God, a bunch of bars, restaurants.

00:04:13.000 Some I can't even remember the name of.

00:04:15.000 Sparr?

00:04:16.000 I started a business with Nas, the rapper, and some other people and it was just... I could tell these nerds were busting their ass so I invested in it and it paid out great.

00:04:26.000 But it was a thing where you go into a store and you use their Wi-Fi.

00:04:30.000 It's commonplace now, but this was back in 2010.

00:04:35.000 And you get on their Wi-Fi and then they follow you all over the store and they see how long you're in the hat section and shit like that.

00:04:44.000 And so the retailer accrues all this data and realizes that no one is buying anything but purses.

00:04:51.000 So we gotta take it easy with the shoes.

00:04:53.000 We're wasting too much money on shoes.

00:04:56.000 Um, perfectly legal.

00:04:58.000 The subway does it now, too.

00:05:00.000 And I don't think people really got at first that they were being tracked and all their movements were being tracked.

00:05:05.000 But now, when you go on the subway, and you can use the NYC subway Wi-Fi, you are totally prepared for what, uh, that they're following all your posts and everything you do and what you look at.

00:05:18.000 I think, I think people have become a lot less, uh, guarded about their privacy, which I don't think is a good thing.

00:05:24.000 But anyway, so I made a bunch of money.

00:05:26.000 Oh, and the rooster thing, a few people know this, but I had an ad agency.

00:05:31.000 We built it up from scratch.

00:05:33.000 It was really just a production company.

00:05:34.000 And those things are kind of easy to grow because you obviously don't start with 15 cameras and cameramen and light and sound.

00:05:44.000 You rent it as you make more money.

00:05:46.000 That's kind of what we did with Vice.

00:05:47.000 If we sold X amount of ads, we'd print X amount of copies.

00:05:51.000 Back when we were starting out.

00:05:52.000 So we never really went into debt.

00:05:55.000 And so we'd get maybe one silly production job.

00:05:57.000 You know, when you start out with production, you're doing stuff like some Ukrainian billionaire wants to make a birthday video for his 30th birthday.

00:06:06.000 Or it's some, you know, you're getting subcontracted out by some bigger ad firm who doesn't feel like doing the whole commercial.

00:06:13.000 I'm actually boring myself as I talk about this.

00:06:16.000 I loved the guys I worked with.

00:06:18.000 I have a painting of them on my wall.

00:06:20.000 But, um, I did not enjoy advertising.

00:06:23.000 Jesus Lord.

00:06:25.000 Like, there was—sometimes we'd get free reign.

00:06:27.000 Like, I did all these Vans off-the-wall commercials, like, how to drink in a bar you should check out, how to fly, how to fight.

00:06:35.000 Um, and those were all fun, because we knew—I knew Vans for a while now, and they trusted me, and they said, just go bananas.

00:06:41.000 These are funny.

00:06:42.000 How to Piss in Public already went viral for them.

00:06:44.000 That was seven million.

00:06:46.000 Um.

00:06:48.000 So that was super fun, and I'm really proud of those.

00:06:51.000 Even though I think Vans has since sold, and everyone that I work with there is gone, and I think they've scrubbed them from the internet.

00:06:59.000 But you can still find them.

00:07:00.000 You can't scrub the internet.

00:07:02.000 They're just not as high-res.

00:07:04.000 But outside of that, however, it was coming up with a great idea.

00:07:11.000 And then the client going, uh, I don't know, that might be offensive.

00:07:15.000 And then all the other ingredients.

00:07:18.000 And that would ruin the joke.

00:07:19.000 So if it was something like a tequila company and you're going down there and filming the cacti and how they make it, they can't really mess that up.

00:07:26.000 And our cameraman Rob was really good and he'd say it would look beautiful.

00:07:30.000 But comedy is so fragile.

00:07:35.000 One little stutter.

00:07:37.000 The joke is gone.

00:07:39.000 Well, that's the problem with Colorado.

00:07:41.000 Like, unless you're a stutterer and that's your schtick.

00:07:44.000 No.

00:07:45.000 So, as these clients get involved, the joke just gets worse and worse.

00:07:49.000 And here's another annoying thing.

00:07:50.000 We'd be on a budget, so we couldn't really hire the best actors.

00:07:54.000 And sometimes, you'd get these fucking Europeans.

00:07:58.000 Like someone from Hungary shows up and they're there to do a cell phone ad.

00:08:02.000 And you're like, okay, so just read the line here.

00:08:04.000 Okay.

00:08:05.000 Hey, one time are you guys going to be calling him?

00:08:08.000 And I go, what do you have an accent?

00:08:10.000 No, not really.

00:08:12.000 Yeah, dude, you can't be advertising an American cell phone company with an accent.

00:08:17.000 It totally changes the whole context.

00:08:19.000 Now we're, it's about long distance.

00:08:22.000 Why did you come to this audition?

00:08:24.000 One time we did an ad for Realtor.com, and it's about, you know, you get reactions so fast that you have to run to the new location because it's so awesome.

00:08:35.000 I don't even really remember the premise.

00:08:38.000 But the guy who showed up, he's in the shower, and then they go, your apartment's ready!

00:08:42.000 Oh, what the?

00:08:42.000 Already?

00:08:43.000 And so he runs out of the shower, and he's wearing a towel, and he runs down the street and up the block, and we see him running all over town in his towel.

00:08:51.000 The guy who showed up, he was pretty good in the audition, he shows up, it doesn't have a Hungarian accent, I don't think, this didn't matter because there was no lines.

00:09:01.000 He had no fucking belly button.

00:09:04.000 At all.

00:09:05.000 I guess it was infected and they had to seal it shut.

00:09:08.000 And I go, dude, you're in a shirtless commercial and you have a very abnormal torso.

00:09:17.000 You couldn't have mentioned that?

00:09:19.000 You couldn't have thrown that in the mix?

00:09:20.000 Hi, I'm deformed.

00:09:23.000 I'll be representing your product.

00:09:26.000 That's not going to be distracting.

00:09:27.000 So we've got to shoot around it and make sure we never quite get him dead on with his belly button if he's not jiggling half a block away.

00:09:33.000 But that commercial, I believe, went through maybe 100,000 edits.

00:09:40.000 It's a very simple concept.

00:09:42.000 But you sit with the editor and then everyone wants to feel involved.

00:09:46.000 So then the production company that got you the gig and subcontracted it to you, they want to sit in on the editing room.

00:09:52.000 Don't worry, this show is going to get better.

00:09:54.000 They want to sit in on the editing room and they all have their two cents.

00:09:58.000 So I'm counting each one of those suggestions as a version.

00:10:02.000 So they go, what if he was running backwards?

00:10:07.000 Comedy's fragile.

00:10:09.000 One joke can't take anything.

00:10:10.000 Sarah Silverman, back when she was on our side, she used to say that.

00:10:12.000 She'd say, my only goal when I sit down and write a joke is to be funny.

00:10:15.000 If I worry about anything else, like is this offensive?

00:10:19.000 Am I targeting the wrong group?

00:10:22.000 It's gone.

00:10:23.000 It's garbage.

00:10:24.000 And in advertising, you get that even before you talk to the client.

00:10:28.000 There's one thing you do in advertising where you go, all right, I wrote the bit.

00:10:33.000 It's maybe dramatic or comedy or whatever, but I wrote the concept.

00:10:37.000 Then they got to get to a Snickers bar or whatever.

00:10:39.000 And then someone will go, how are we doing with diversity?

00:10:43.000 And then you have to go backwards into the joke and start making people black or Asian or something.

00:10:48.000 But sometimes it's changing the whole thing.

00:10:50.000 Like if it's a girl and she's on a date and then she gets hit on by someone and she likes him more, the new guy, well if you make him black, now it's like, black people gonna steal your woman.

00:11:02.000 So then you make the woman black, but then if it's an Asian guy, it doesn't look as plausible and blah blah blah, it's already ruined and we're not even at casting yet.

00:11:12.000 So I don't miss that.

00:11:14.000 But, um, we ramped it up, ramped it up, and we sold it to this company called Havas.

00:11:18.000 And it was kind of under the guise of, let's be a secret satellite.

00:11:22.000 So if you have a Coca-Cola contract, and you want to do a Pepsi commercial, and usually these big corporations demand exclusivity, because they don't want their client to be competing with their client.

00:11:35.000 So we'll just secretly do a Pepsi ad.

00:11:37.000 And slide you the money.

00:11:38.000 We were even planning a secret door.

00:11:41.000 But they bought us for many millions.

00:11:45.000 And we did not generate many millions.

00:11:47.000 But that's the way advertising is.

00:11:50.000 And to fail in advertising is like to fail in movies.

00:11:55.000 They saw Jackass was made for 5 million.

00:11:57.000 It made 200 million.

00:11:58.000 So that's a hit.

00:11:59.000 They saw Paranormal Activity or Blair Witch.

00:12:03.000 All $5 million and became $200 million.

00:12:05.000 So if you have a movie that costs $60 million and it makes $70 million, it's a flop.

00:12:10.000 The studio hates you.

00:12:12.000 And that's kind of what was happening with us.

00:12:13.000 We were just generating a reasonable profit as opposed to a super big explosion.

00:12:18.000 I mean, Havas is one of the biggest companies in the world.

00:12:20.000 They're French.

00:12:21.000 So they were waiting, biding their time.

00:12:25.000 And they were like, we gotta get rid of these guys.

00:12:27.000 They're not the cash cow we thought they'd be.

00:12:29.000 And so when I said, transphobia is perfectly natural, I had all these mentally ill trannies coming after me and going over to social media and threatening everyone.

00:12:38.000 Except Havas.

00:12:39.000 They said, uh, oh, we have to fire you.

00:12:41.000 It's over.

00:12:42.000 And then shut everything down.

00:12:45.000 So I've been through this before.

00:12:47.000 But anyway, that was a long-winded way of saying I've started a lot of companies.

00:12:51.000 And the Hipster Hacker Hustler formula is really effective.

00:12:54.000 And to think you can do it all is just naive.

00:12:57.000 You know, I see Shark Tank people come out and it's one dude.

00:13:01.000 And he designed the package, and he does the sales, and he stirs the magic peanut butter, and he's been talking to vendors all day.

00:13:10.000 No, dude.

00:13:11.000 You have to do what you're good at.

00:13:12.000 You need to be specialized.

00:13:14.000 And sales is a major part of any business.

00:13:18.000 You have to go out.

00:13:19.000 You have to play golf with them.

00:13:20.000 They have to like you.

00:13:22.000 Because it's one thing for you to be my paper supplier, as like the show The Office.

00:13:30.000 But I gotta see you every week.

00:13:31.000 And sometimes we're gonna be going away together.

00:13:34.000 Like say there's a convention and you guys are my supplier or something.

00:13:37.000 So when you do that, uh, and I don't like you, then no one wants to hang out with you.

00:13:42.000 I think that's why Japanese businessmen get so shithammered with their clients.

00:13:46.000 They're establishing a closer relationship.

00:13:50.000 A friendship.

00:13:50.000 I think that's why... What's her name over at the New York Times?

00:13:57.000 See, this always happens with... Executive editor of the New York Times.

00:14:02.000 I've hung out with her about ten times and her brain just left my mind.

00:14:06.000 Anyway, executive editor.

00:14:07.000 They say she was... Jill Abramson.

00:14:09.000 They say she was fired because, you know, she was a woman demanding too much money.

00:14:13.000 I don't think so.

00:14:13.000 I think it was she wasn't having beers with Pinch.

00:14:16.000 And she wasn't friendly with him.

00:14:19.000 And he was like, I don't want this bitch around.

00:14:20.000 I want buddies.

00:14:23.000 So.

00:14:25.000 Um.

00:14:27.000 Yeah.

00:14:28.000 So sales is important because you're establishing that you can be good buddies and you're fun to work with.

00:14:34.000 And so an important part of any business is this hustler guy, the sales guy.

00:14:38.000 And that guy, it's good if he's fat cause he has to take people up for dinner all the time and do a lot of drinking.

00:14:44.000 A lot of them in New York, a lot of the ad agency guys are just brutal alcoholics because they're out whining and dining clients at lunch and then at dinner.

00:14:52.000 Like that's the Don Draper culture.

00:14:56.000 Um,

00:14:58.000 And I don't have the energy for that.

00:15:00.000 And I don't have a sales personality.

00:15:02.000 My dad was talking about this.

00:15:03.000 He's the same way.

00:15:04.000 If I believe in something, I want you to buy it.

00:15:07.000 I want you to invest in it.

00:15:08.000 I want you to become part of it.

00:15:09.000 If I don't believe in it, I don't want to have anything to do with it.

00:15:12.000 At all.

00:15:14.000 And so when I'm offering something, it's like my baby.

00:15:17.000 And then if someone says, no, well, you just insulted my kid.

00:15:20.000 So I'm like, do you want to buy this new yellow hockey tape?

00:15:20.000 Fuck you.

00:15:25.000 You can buy it in bulk.

00:15:26.000 It lasts forever.

00:15:27.000 No, doesn't.

00:15:28.000 I like my other hockey tape.

00:15:29.000 Well, fuck you.

00:15:31.000 This hockey tape's way better, shithead.

00:15:33.000 And that's not any kind of way to do business.

00:15:36.000 So I'm way too sensitive about my product.

00:15:37.000 And the beauty of being, like, doing the creative stuff, like, coming up with the project, what the commercial is or whatever it's gonna be, the book, you can argue with the people on your team and go, well, tell them to go fuck themselves.

00:15:50.000 No!

00:15:51.000 It has to be this way.

00:15:52.000 This is how it's funniest, or whatever.

00:15:53.000 And then they are a buffer, and they go, please calm down.

00:15:56.000 You're getting on my nerves.

00:15:56.000 Go have a drink.

00:15:58.000 And the client never hears the bitchy creative director.

00:16:03.000 So the sales guy, I would say, is the most important part of any business.

00:16:09.000 And he should get more equity, he should get more money, he should get a commission, too, on top of his salary.

00:16:17.000 You're nothing without him, folks.

00:16:18.000 Sowie.

00:16:20.000 No, the creative is the important one.

00:16:24.000 No.

00:16:24.000 There's, like, look at magazines.

00:16:26.000 They're all about the same quality.

00:16:28.000 And the writers, you can switch them out like nothing.

00:16:31.000 It's, without ads, there's no magazine.

00:16:33.000 There's plenty of shitty magazines.

00:16:35.000 Remember that one, what was it called, Urban or something?

00:16:38.000 And it was just, I think it was these British guys that had a fetish for black chicks and hip-hop.

00:16:42.000 And it was just, like, pictures of black models and then two shitty interviews with a rapper.

00:16:47.000 And it went on, it's probably still around, I don't remember, but that was, like,

00:16:50.000 20 years of a successful magazine that had no content to speak of of any value So the sales guy is the guy and it's a rare talent and I don't know why those guys get a bad rap they I think it was used car salesman in the in the 70s and 80s, but they're known as slick willies and

00:17:09.000 I think it's an amazing talent to get, it's sort of like being a boxer.

00:17:13.000 Like I box, but if I'm sparring and I get punched in the face, I want a two hour timeout and I want to talk to the guy, why'd you hit me?

00:17:21.000 I want it to be a national holiday.

00:17:23.000 Like I just can't poo-poo it.

00:17:26.000 And that's why I'll never be a boxer, I never could have been a boxer.

00:17:29.000 Because I can't just, there's a thing they do where they get punched

00:17:33.000 And they go, oh, shit, that was my fault.

00:17:36.000 I left my right open.

00:17:36.000 I gotta remember what's the matter with me.

00:17:39.000 Always keep your right up.

00:17:41.000 Very vulnerable there on that cheek.

00:17:43.000 You got a glass jaw.

00:17:44.000 Come on.

00:17:45.000 Wake up, dummy.

00:17:46.000 Like, they get mad at themselves.

00:17:49.000 And the fact that someone punched them is irrelevant.

00:17:51.000 For them, it's a chess move, and I left myself open.

00:17:54.000 And salesmen are the same way.

00:17:56.000 They can just take all these hits and just keep on smiling.

00:17:59.000 Oh, we'll get it.

00:18:01.000 We'll do it.

00:18:03.000 We'll make no money.

00:18:06.000 That's impressive, and that's another biggie.

00:18:10.000 You're not making a penny for the first two years.

00:18:12.000 I think a lot of millennials don't get that, and if you don't get that, don't be an entrepreneur.

00:18:19.000 If it's not in you, don't do it.

00:18:22.000 If the idea of working through the weekend makes you barf, and you're like, it's Friday, it's five o'clock, I'm punching out.

00:18:28.000 If you're that type of person, and I have no disrespect to that type of person, go bananas, then don't get involved.

00:18:35.000 An entrepreneur is someone who is constantly at work, always thinking about work, always wondering how it could be improved.

00:18:43.000 They are happy to get up at three in the morning because an alarm went off at the store.

00:18:47.000 It's their baby.

00:18:48.000 It's their other child.

00:18:50.000 Sometimes they make kind of bad husbands, because they're built to always be looking for a better deal, and to be able to just quit something instantly.

00:18:59.000 Like, if you have a supplier, and you've been with them for four years, and someone offers to undercut the supplier by 10%, you gotta go, buy people I've been working with for four years?

00:19:09.000 You know, within range, you'll cut some favors.

00:19:12.000 Like, I'll say to buddies at work or someone I work with that I have a good relationship with, alright, you're offering me eight bucks, this guy's offering me ten bucks.

00:19:20.000 I can maybe take a hit, but if someone's offering me fourteen bucks and you're offering me eight, I gotta go to the fourteen bucks, dude.

00:19:28.000 I'd be a cuck if I stayed with you.

00:19:30.000 What would you do is another way to phrase it.

00:19:32.000 That's a good way to talk to your boss, by the way, if you're getting scooped by a company with more salary.

00:19:36.000 Just say, I'll take a little bit less than this offer, but not a lot.

00:19:42.000 They understand.

00:19:43.000 You can stick around and be friends after.

00:19:46.000 But the entrepreneur is someone who just totally accepts that they're going to be eating out of the garbage for two years, has no problem with it whatsoever, and I would argue isn't that driven by money?

00:20:01.000 I don't think money is that much of an incentive.

00:20:03.000 Once you make a hundred grand a year, your life is pretty much the same as someone who makes a million a year.

00:20:09.000 You go out for some nice dinners.

00:20:11.000 I guess people who make a million a year fly a lot better, but if you're not flying a lot, it's just a nicer chair.

00:20:18.000 I mean, I go first class on the train.

00:20:20.000 It's the same as coach.

00:20:22.000 I think the chair leather is like 1% higher quality.

00:20:25.000 I don't understand why it's a hundred bucks more, but anyway.

00:20:30.000 I remember I had this black intern, I've told this story nine billion times, but for all interns, it was an initiation.

00:20:40.000 And so the first week always sucks.

00:20:43.000 Second week's a little better.

00:20:44.000 Third week's much better.

00:20:45.000 And then if you've been there for a year, and well, first of all, I don't think you should intern for a year, but if you have been there for a year, you know, you get really, you can write a cover story if you're good enough.

00:20:55.000 But this was an entitled girl, black chick, middle class, thought she was special and she came in and I would give her jobs like take out the garbage.

00:21:06.000 Now there's a method to this madness.

00:21:08.000 The reason you were doing that initiation is to show them that

00:21:13.000 You had to take out the garbage when you started the company.

00:21:17.000 No, you don't magically start with a maid.

00:21:19.000 You have to clean the bathroom floors when you get your first business, when you do a startup.

00:21:25.000 You have to organize all the taxes.

00:21:28.000 The state tax is in the red shoebox.

00:21:31.000 The municipal tax is in the orange shoebox.

00:21:33.000 You've got to write all that out with sharpies and...

00:21:36.000 You know, make sure there's no dishes in the sink and all that stuff.

00:21:39.000 That's all you.

00:21:41.000 So with the interns, I'm saying, you want to go on my journey?

00:21:43.000 It starts with taking out the garbage.

00:21:45.000 And she would get so pissy.

00:21:48.000 And, uh, so I never gave her much better jobs than that, at least for the first week.

00:21:52.000 And then she quits, of course.

00:21:53.000 By the way, I think interns are overrated.

00:21:56.000 I think it's just free university.

00:21:59.000 As from the intern's perspective, they're getting tons.

00:22:01.000 It's an awesome thing to do, and I think it's way better than college to be an intern.

00:22:05.000 But from the employer's perspective, I'd rather just do it myself, thanks.

00:22:08.000 Like, in that instance, rather than have someone pissy and grumpy sitting a few desks down, I'll just take the garbage out myself, get a breath of fresh air while I go out there and throw it in the dumpster.

00:22:18.000 But anyway, so this was the intern desk.

00:22:22.000 So after she quit, I was going through the desk for some reason, and inside, there's nothing else inside, there was one crumpled up post-it note.

00:22:31.000 And I unfurled it, and it said, why do they keep giving me these stupid, shitty jobs?

00:22:36.000 Hasn't 400 years of history taught them I'm worth something more?

00:22:43.000 No, that's problematic for a number of reasons.

00:22:45.000 One, you've let race and slavery become an anvil that's chained to your leg.

00:22:52.000 And everything is seen through the prism of oppression.

00:22:55.000 And that's not what we were doing.

00:22:56.000 That was not the point of the exercise.

00:22:59.000 In fact, I find initiations have a lot of camaraderie in them.

00:23:03.000 Like, hazing comes from a place of love.

00:23:05.000 Because it's like, let's be in this club together.

00:23:08.000 Let's go through it.

00:23:11.000 Um, but secondly, that's not an entrepreneur.

00:23:15.000 An entrepreneur doesn't... An entrepreneur is all about the big picture.

00:23:19.000 Sometimes to a fault.

00:23:21.000 Sometimes they lack, you know, loyalty and intimacy or something.

00:23:24.000 But, um...

00:23:25.000 Yeah, an entrepreneur's like, yep, let's take out all the garbage.

00:23:28.000 You know, cameramen in New York, they get tortured.

00:23:33.000 Guys who shoot movies and stuff, the ADs, the intern helper guys, the cameramen, like if they're shooting a Tom Cruise movie or something, those guys will work for free for years.

00:23:43.000 This is kind of different.

00:23:44.000 You're not an entrepreneur if you're a camera guy, right?

00:23:47.000 Although sometimes you are, yeah.

00:23:48.000 Sometimes you're a hired gun.

00:23:49.000 You buy your own camera for 150 grand and you shoot movies with it.

00:23:53.000 Yeah, that can work.

00:23:54.000 But anyway, what they do with those guys is they'll say, I want a frappuccino latte, but I want it from this one cafe on 32nd Street, even though we're in Brooklyn.

00:24:04.000 So it's an hour trip there and back.

00:24:06.000 And if it's cold by the time it comes back, they just throw it on the ground and go, you fucked up, this is freezing.

00:24:11.000 So they have to bring warmers on this pilgrimage.

00:24:13.000 And it's got nothing to do with the coffee.

00:24:15.000 It has to do with, can you hack it?

00:24:17.000 Because being a cameraman is very technical and stuff, but it's also

00:24:21.000 Brutally physical.

00:24:22.000 It's freezing cold for a lot of these shoots and you're drenched at night.

00:24:26.000 You got to work in the rain.

00:24:27.000 It's $300 an hour for everyone to be there or I should say, sorry, $3,000 an hour for all the staff and everything.

00:24:34.000 So they don't want to shut it down because it's a little misty out.

00:24:36.000 And you know, if you're over, if you're behind schedule, some of your days are 16 hour days.

00:24:40.000 There's plenty of 24 hour days.

00:24:42.000 There's plenty of times where you only have this venue for this long and the lights weren't working at the beginning.

00:24:47.000 So next thing you know, the sun's coming up.

00:24:49.000 You've been there all night.

00:24:51.000 That happens too.

00:24:52.000 But a 12-hour shift is normal.

00:24:54.000 Anyway, what they're saying with this initiation is, can you handle this brutal workload?

00:25:01.000 And that's why they make them do that stupid stuff.

00:25:02.000 So, um, I was bringing her up to talk about the entrepreneur mentality, but within the entrepreneur mentality, I think the hipster, the hacker, and the hustler all have to have that, I will work all night, I don't care.

00:25:17.000 That's why it's good, that's why I get so mad at these illegal aliens doing teenager jobs, like mowing lawns and cleaning pools, because that's when you develop your economic libido.

00:25:26.000 That's when you figure out who you are, that's how you learn what money is, that's how you learn, oh, you really gotta nag people when they owe you money.

00:25:32.000 I mean, everyone has vendors.

00:25:34.000 Biggest companies in the world have bills they're waiting to get paid.

00:25:39.000 And you gotta call them early in the morning, and you learn that from nagging the people who, who's pooled you clean when you were 14.

00:25:47.000 So, the other big mentality that these three people have, have to have, besides the, I don't care if it's day or night, I'll work all week, I'll do anything, I'm gonna miss weddings, whatever.

00:25:58.000 The other one you have to have is, no is not an option.

00:26:02.000 Now the best example I always give for this is back in Vice days.

00:26:06.000 This guy told us that he could put the magazines in the shipment.

00:26:11.000 He shipped records all over Canada and he said, I'll just put some of your, I think it was voice of Montreal back then.

00:26:16.000 I'll put your voice of Montreal's in there and you can be in a national company.

00:26:19.000 Now your voice of Canada, not voice of Montreal.

00:26:22.000 Cool, man.

00:26:23.000 Thank you.

00:26:23.000 Yeah, it's good for me, because it's a little prize in there.

00:26:26.000 So we sell all of these ads to all these national companies.

00:26:30.000 We were just in Montreal before, but now instead of talking to Warner Brothers Montreal, who don't really have a budget, it's Warner Brothers Canada.

00:26:37.000 Hmm, now we're cooking with gas.

00:26:38.000 Now we're getting some real ads.

00:26:40.000 About three days before, he goes, yeah, I can't do it.

00:26:43.000 Pardonnez-moi?

00:26:45.000 I didn't realize this, but it adds a lot to the shipping, because it's magazines.

00:26:48.000 They're heavy.

00:26:49.000 Oh, thanks, bro.

00:26:52.000 Now, the crumpled up post-it note intern woman goes, oh well, that's the end of that.

00:26:58.000 But the entrepreneur brain goes, no is not an option.

00:27:02.000 These have to get there.

00:27:04.000 And we came up with this concept where we called all these record stores across the country and said, we'll give you a free ad if you deliver these magazines in your town.

00:27:14.000 And then we went to the Greyhound bus station and

00:27:16.000 We're good to go.

00:27:34.000 You know, we went bankrupt in the early 2000s.

00:27:39.000 Beyond bankrupt, maybe a million dollars in debt.

00:27:42.000 And we just kept slugging away.

00:27:44.000 Moved into a warehouse in Williamsburg.

00:27:47.000 And just kept telling people that we owed money to that we're sorry and we'll try to cut you some money.

00:27:53.000 And rebuilt it again from scratch.

00:27:54.000 Because that was the no is not an option mentality.

00:27:59.000 All right.

00:28:00.000 So we have

00:28:01.000 We have the sales guy.

00:28:03.000 We have the entrepreneur mentality.

00:28:07.000 Here's another example, by the way, of the entrepreneur mentality.

00:28:09.000 I remember way, way back, we were trying to get absolute vodka.

00:28:14.000 And when you're trying to get a client that big, what you often do is finish the campaign.

00:28:20.000 So this was when they would do, like, absolute spicy, and they'd have an absolute bottle, you know, engulfed in flames.

00:28:26.000 Or absolute, you know, Mozart, and it would be a piano key absolute bottle.

00:28:33.000 And so we had, like, absolute rock and roll or absolute punk or something, and it was a bottle covered in, like, the studs you put on your leather jacket.

00:28:40.000 But that takes a long time, and you want it to be meticulous.

00:28:42.000 You don't want to see blobs of glue and stuff.

00:28:44.000 And the graphic design guy I was working with at the time goes, I'm not doing that.

00:28:48.000 And I said, why not?

00:28:48.000 And he says, well, they're not going to pay for it, so it's unethical.

00:28:51.000 That was the word he used, unethical.

00:28:54.000 Dude, that's business!

00:28:56.000 You will court someone for years and never get them.

00:29:00.000 I'm told that McDonald's has entire campaigns, do-do-do-do-do, that just get flushed down the toilet.

00:29:07.000 They're so, they pay so well that ad agencies will just finish the campaign and then present it to them as a giant campaign and they'll go, no thanks, and that's, I don't know what, a million dollars down the drain?

00:29:19.000 That's how it works.

00:29:20.000 Sorry!

00:29:21.000 Not everything is a perfect equi-minical, you did this, here's your money back.

00:29:27.000 Oh, you worked for an hour, there's your $15 minimum wage.

00:29:30.000 And if you have that mentality, fine.

00:29:33.000 But don't think you're ever going to get rich.

00:29:36.000 I'm sorry.

00:29:37.000 There's nothing wrong with not being rich.

00:29:39.000 $50k a year is the average American salary.

00:29:41.000 If you're not in New York City,

00:29:42.000 That's a pretty good living.

00:29:44.000 You know, your kid has a motorbike when he's 17.

00:29:46.000 With that kind of money, your kid's in sports.

00:29:50.000 You're still going on vacation.

00:29:52.000 You can rent an SUV.

00:29:54.000 I mean, you can rent a Winnebago or whatever.

00:29:58.000 Anyhiz!

00:30:00.000 So we got the sales guy, got the mentality.

00:30:03.000 Then there's the hipster and the hacker.

00:30:05.000 And the hacker is an IT guy who makes sure everything works.

00:30:09.000 I know that sounds boring.

00:30:10.000 That's just email, isn't it?

00:30:12.000 No, there's a million different things that involves, from the truck rentals when you're shooting something, to bugs in the system, to backup.

00:30:22.000 You know, when I first started media, we didn't have backups.

00:30:29.000 So something would go BOOM!

00:30:31.000 And you would lose 16 hours of work.

00:30:33.000 It was one of the worst experiences of my life.

00:30:36.000 I remember just seeing that happen.

00:30:38.000 BOOM!

00:30:39.000 Oh, it was even worse than that.

00:30:40.000 The files were on my desktop, and they'd be like 50 megabytes.

00:30:44.000 And then I would go, you know, Control-I-Info to see how big they are.

00:30:46.000 50 megabytes.

00:30:48.000 Then I'd close it.

00:30:49.000 I'm not opening the thing, I'm just doing the info on it.

00:30:51.000 Then it's 48 megabytes.

00:30:53.000 And I'm like, what the fuck?

00:30:55.000 This thing is, it has flesh-eating disease.

00:30:58.000 It's eating itself.

00:31:00.000 So I have to open it, open the file, cut wherever I can, paste it somewhere else, and then boom, it crashes again.

00:31:06.000 I'm getting stressed out just remembering it.

00:31:07.000 I remember standing up, taking my shirt off, like feeling really hot, panicky, and then lying down on the floor just trying to breathe.

00:31:16.000 But the good news about something like that is, you go, everyone's going to experience a shitty moment like that in a startup.

00:31:23.000 A lot of people are gonna quit when something terrible like that happens, and say, fuck it, I hate these computers, fuck this shit, I'm outta here.

00:31:31.000 Now you're in a smaller group.

00:31:32.000 It's just like sports.

00:31:34.000 You know, you get through this level, this championship, and the next thing you know, there's only that many people who can run a four minute mile.

00:31:42.000 And you're, now you're special.

00:31:45.000 So, the hacker doesn't sound very exciting, and it's probably not.

00:31:48.000 I did it sometimes when we couldn't afford to hire IT guys and stuff like that, but making sure everything works and is up to date is massive.

00:31:48.000 It's not to me.

00:31:58.000 It's huge, and it's a very rare talent.

00:32:00.000 I don't think it's something that

00:32:04.000 I mean, of course you go to school for all that stuff, but the kind of people who can really get into tech and, you know, all the details of all the equipment in your office and how it works and how to back it up and they get on magazines and stuff and chat rooms on new technology and, you know, those sort of gear heads.

00:32:22.000 Engineers.

00:32:24.000 They're a different breed.

00:32:26.000 Like the sales guy.

00:32:28.000 So, I'm sorry I don't have much to say about them, but suffice to say, when I say these groups, you absolutely need to have them.

00:32:37.000 You're nothing without your sales guy.

00:32:39.000 You're nothing without your hacker.

00:32:41.000 So this leaves the hipster.

00:32:43.000 This is someone who, now he was using it to talk about ad sales.

00:32:48.000 If you're running a cake company, you don't need a hipster per se, but you do need a woman or a person or a chef who loves cakes and cake culture and knows the top cake guys.

00:33:00.000 Now I've always been into sort of subcultures, you know, alternative culture.

00:33:07.000 And when I was, you know, I remember when I was 12, I would sit with my tape player in front of the radio and press record every time there was a new song.

00:33:14.000 And then if I didn't like it, I would stop, rewind it back to the previous thing.

00:33:19.000 And then wait for the next song.

00:33:22.000 So it's like making a mixtape live and then eventually it would be both sides full of songs that I really liked with nothing I don't like.

00:33:31.000 I was making mixtapes.

00:33:33.000 And later on, you know, through magazines, I would trade tapes back and forth with people in Europe, punk tapes.

00:33:41.000 Hardcore was sort of like American punk, and it was a stripped-down, raw, less floral, less colorful music.

00:33:47.000 It was like fast, cheap, and easy version.

00:33:49.000 It's like a hot rod version of a fancy car.

00:33:54.000 So hardcore was very regional.

00:33:56.000 And you had your little scene, and people go, oh, you must have heard, you must be down, like, you were into hardcore, what do you think of the Cro-Mags and Agnostic Front and all those New York bands?

00:34:06.000 And I go, they weren't really part of my world.

00:34:08.000 It was my little scene.

00:34:10.000 You know, we all had our little scenes.

00:34:11.000 That was kind of a cooler thing.

00:34:13.000 Punk rock had this sort of rock star thing where Johnny Rotten was the Rolling Stones and all that.

00:34:18.000 But we didn't have, like, we didn't care who celebrities were.

00:34:20.000 We didn't have Rolling Stones.

00:34:22.000 There was just our hardcore scene.

00:34:24.000 Neanderthal Sponge, Dead Trout, Grave Concern, The Trapped, Anal Chinook, Zenslap, Porcelain Forehead.

00:34:33.000 That's who I cared about.

00:34:36.000 Anyway, you trade tapes with someone else in their little scene.

00:34:38.000 I'm going off on a tangent here, but my point is, genetically, I was always the pop culture guy who's really into the culture.

00:34:46.000 And lots of people who made it big in pop culture were nerds, like fanboys.

00:34:52.000 Morrissey wrote for NME.

00:34:54.000 Iggy Pop was just a fan who assembled the Stooges out of his favorite bands.

00:35:00.000 Chuck D used to do Flyers.

00:35:02.000 Ludacris was a DJ.

00:35:05.000 They were all fans.

00:35:07.000 Benicio Del Toro used to collect autographs.

00:35:11.000 They were all fans, and that's why they had the energy.

00:35:14.000 So, like, the sales guy, he's not into content.

00:35:18.000 But when he's pitching something, he wants to be pitching something that has some substance to it, some background.

00:35:24.000 And then, inevitably, when another company meets, it's like, it's like two gangs meeting, or two bands, and the sales guy will put the two creative guys together and they go, oh yeah, I heard about that, yeah, he's doing a thing now with these other guys, it's gonna be coming out and it's gonna be all, you know, it's gonna be covering entire buildings with, with giant, uh, curtains.

00:35:43.000 Oh yeah, I've heard of him, yeah, that's gonna be cool when he does it in Central Park, blah blah blah blah blah.

00:35:47.000 Now they have something to sell.

00:35:50.000 Perfect machine.

00:35:51.000 And everyone has their job.

00:35:53.000 And everyone is in trouble if that particular thing fails.

00:35:57.000 If the company doesn't pay for the project, the sales guy fucked up.

00:36:01.000 He didn't get the correct paperwork.

00:36:03.000 That's his job.

00:36:03.000 He's in big trouble.

00:36:05.000 If the thing doesn't work, the hacker's fucked.

00:36:07.000 What are you doing, you idiot?

00:36:08.000 You're gonna get fired.

00:36:09.000 We're gonna fire you, our friend.

00:36:12.000 And if the hipster has some cultural project, it's a joke that's already been stolen, already done somewhere else or something like that, well now he's on the chopping block.

00:36:21.000 But we can't be all responsible for everything.

00:36:23.000 That's not how shit gets done.

00:36:25.000 Now, I brought this up in a previous episode, and a... woman.

00:36:31.000 I gotta say, man.

00:36:35.000 Women over 40, upper middle class, childless or divorced, are usually white, are the bane of my existence.

00:36:46.000 I want to start a KKK, totally devoted to them, where we burn giant wood vaginas on their lawn.

00:36:54.000 They are the worst!

00:36:57.000 They're such busybodies!

00:37:02.000 Ugh!

00:37:02.000 Just getting into other people's lives, and I see it

00:37:06.000 In the workforce.

00:37:07.000 I'm sorry, I'm getting real sexist here.

00:37:10.000 But I think 95% of women would be happier at home, and when they have jobs, they go, I'm totally fulfilled by my career, blah, blah, blah.

00:37:17.000 Their jobs seem to be silly, busybody jobs.

00:37:21.000 Like, why are they always doing social media?

00:37:25.000 What's your job for the company?

00:37:27.000 I post shit on Facebook about what they did.

00:37:30.000 Oh, so what a mom would do about her family, but this is for someone else.

00:37:33.000 So you've been liberated from the kitchen, and now you're in a cubicle keeping some other man's appointments.

00:37:40.000 They're rarely oncologists.

00:37:42.000 They're usually doing a thing that you can't really quantify the value of.

00:37:46.000 Remember, I think it was last year, when they said women don't go to work day?

00:37:49.000 Ooh, the economy just shut down that day, didn't it?

00:37:52.000 Oh no, we don't have a Facebook post up.

00:37:55.000 And I think not only do these women meddle and get people fired, they also are prosecutors and judges and they throw men in cages for bullshit charges because their feminist agenda leaks in there.

00:38:07.000 I've talked to men, I would never name names, who told me, yeah, we have kind of a secret dictum at the office now, no more women.

00:38:14.000 It's just too expensive.

00:38:16.000 These women have brought this upon themselves by freaking out over everything and saying that was basically sexual harassment.

00:38:22.000 No, it's me joking around with you.

00:38:24.000 I sexually harassed all the men I work with.

00:38:27.000 We talk about how gorgeous his ass is because it's funny.

00:38:30.000 Last time I was at work, I was sitting around with five other guys and we were talking about what we are out of ten.

00:38:36.000 And being totally clinical about it and discussing why it's a 6.4 and how it could be bumped up to a 7.

00:38:46.000 If you did that to a woman, it should be mortified.

00:38:50.000 They were sitting there raiding me.

00:38:52.000 Sorry, not worth it.

00:38:54.000 But here's another thing they do.

00:38:56.000 So they're the head of social media, and they get out there, and then there's something like my trans thing, right?

00:39:03.000 And then this woman who's been monitoring the Twitter account of McDonald's, because that's her job, she finally sees, like, McDonald's is racist.

00:39:10.000 This guy who works at McDonald's said Florida's a cracker state.

00:39:15.000 So she's like, there's a huge controversy.

00:39:17.000 Of course I'm kidding.

00:39:18.000 The racial epithet, cracker, would never be an issue.

00:39:23.000 It would be the n-word, or the homosexual word.

00:39:28.000 But anyway, um... Uh... So, they're doing this job, and then they get this alert.

00:39:35.000 Ooh, finally, a controversy!

00:39:37.000 And they realize, ooh, this is an opportunity for me to show my boss that my job is valuable.

00:39:43.000 So she storms into the CEO's office and goes, We have a major emergency!

00:39:49.000 One of our companies has a transphobe!

00:39:52.000 I found it on Facebook and Twitter, and we're getting a bad rep.

00:39:55.000 Now the CEO is busy doing real stuff, generating millions, and he's like, what?

00:39:59.000 Oh, okay, we'll get rid of the problem, make it go away, fire them, or I don't know, put them in jail, whatever you have to do.

00:40:05.000 Okay, I'm on it!

00:40:06.000 Here we go!

00:40:09.000 So it was fake.

00:40:11.000 So she's just hindered.

00:40:13.000 Lost a bunch of money.

00:40:14.000 Lost a bunch of people, a bunch of money.

00:40:16.000 And so, sorry, the reason I'm talking about this is because this woman emailed me and she goes, you're forgetting one thing.

00:40:22.000 A hipster, a hacker hustler, and a hound.

00:40:27.000 Yeah, that's where people, she meant women, but people like me, that's where we come in.

00:40:32.000 We're out there sniffing out what's going on.

00:40:32.000 The hounds.

00:40:34.000 No, that's the hipster.

00:40:35.000 He's sniffing stuff out.

00:40:37.000 We're hounding people.

00:40:38.000 No, that's the sales guy.

00:40:38.000 We're getting them to know.

00:40:40.000 And she sent me this article.

00:40:41.000 She goes, I've summed it up in an article.

00:40:42.000 This is just a rough draft.

00:40:44.000 And the article, I didn't even read it.

00:40:46.000 And it was maybe 450 words.

00:40:48.000 Like, that's how half-assed...

00:40:50.000 You're trying to prove to me that you belong in the workforce, you come up with a dumb theory, and then you're too lazy to even write it out.

00:40:56.000 You would be much happier at home.

00:41:00.000 So much of this fucking feminism is just based on feels.

00:41:05.000 Like this election!

00:41:06.000 I am so proud of women and people of color finally in the house.

00:41:14.000 Can you tell me why?

00:41:16.000 Why is that necessarily a good thing?

00:41:19.000 How about qualified people?

00:41:20.000 Why do you care what race and what gender they are?

00:41:23.000 So what you're saying is...

00:41:25.000 You base your politics on genitalia and skin color.

00:41:29.000 In other words, you're sexist and racist.

00:41:32.000 No, no, no, no.

00:41:34.000 I had... They're talking about this one... What's her name?

00:41:35.000 Irshad Ranadmani or something?

00:41:39.000 She's in, uh... She beat out Keith Ellison in... In where?

00:41:43.000 Was it Milwaukee or something?

00:41:46.000 I was like...

00:41:47.000 Why is, uh... Why are there so many... Like, there was a Muslim against a Muslim?

00:41:53.000 And then I realized, oh, it's Dearborn, Michigan.

00:41:55.000 Yeah, Rashida Tlaib.

00:41:58.000 And she beat out Keith Ellison.

00:41:59.000 Keith Ellison is the guy, black Muslim guy, who beat the living shit out of his wife, and it didn't go anywhere.

00:42:06.000 No one seemed to care.

00:42:07.000 And he was also pictured holding an anarchist handbook thing.

00:42:13.000 I was going to say anarchist cookbook.

00:42:16.000 Just dumpster-dived tofu.

00:42:19.000 But Rashida Tlaib, she's a Somalian refugee.

00:42:24.000 She married her brother to give him citizenship.

00:42:27.000 And then married another guy that she actually liked.

00:42:30.000 So she was in a polygamous relationship.

00:42:33.000 So she committed immigration fraud and marriage fraud.

00:42:37.000 And then said, oh no, I divorced him.

00:42:40.000 But then we found out, no, you were on vacation with him.

00:42:42.000 You're back with him.

00:42:44.000 If you were divorced, you remarried him.

00:42:47.000 No problem, though.

00:42:47.000 What's important is that it's a Muslim, and she has a hijab, and she's a woman of color.

00:42:53.000 That's what matters.

00:42:54.000 Oh, really?

00:42:55.000 What's your favorite policy of hers?

00:42:57.000 I've just read an article in Slate where they go, I'm still buzzing with excitement.

00:43:01.000 Finally, someone who looks like me in the house.

00:43:03.000 Finally, someone who will feel the way I do.

00:43:05.000 Oh, okay.

00:43:08.000 So Muslims

00:43:11.000 Political stances are based on whether they're Muslim or not.

00:43:15.000 I think Sonia Sotomayor said this when she was on the Supreme Court.

00:43:17.000 She said, as a Latina woman, I bring something different to judgment.

00:43:21.000 And if people think that your Latinaness or your femininity doesn't affect your decisions, they're wrong.

00:43:28.000 Oh, okay, so you're not an impartial judge.

00:43:30.000 That's nice.

00:43:31.000 So now, black people should vote for black people, women should vote for women, and Muslims should vote for Muslims, and each of those groups will act accordingly, and the black politicians will be biased, I guess, to black communities, or make sure they get more.

00:43:49.000 I think sometimes when there's these affirmative action type things, the person feels compelled to be affirmative action-y.

00:43:56.000 Like, if I was hired, because I'm Scottish, at some company, and they're like, we got our Scottish guy, I'd feel like, oh, we should probably get some shortbread in here, and I guess Robbie Burns Day should be a holiday at the company, we should all not come in on Robbie Burns Day, because you hired me to do Scottish shit, I guess I gotta Scottish it up here.

00:44:12.000 I guess I'll bring some bagpipes and a kilt to work on Thursday.

00:44:16.000 Like the woman who hired, uh...

00:44:18.000 The woman who fired Roseanne, I think she was a recent affirmative action hire, a black woman, and she was just like, oh, I heard a rude joke, boom, show's cancelled, we're switching it to the Connors, boom, like no trial, no time for an apology, just boom.

00:44:33.000 Because I guess she figures that's what I was hired to do.

00:44:36.000 Or I think the woman who runs Vanity Fair is an affirmative action hire.

00:44:39.000 And Vanity Fair, I talked about this the other day, it's for girls, I don't like it, but it's for girls to fantasize about what it would be like to be married to George Clooney, and they'd go on holiday in the Swiss Alps, and they'd fly private jets everywhere.

00:44:52.000 It's like, uh, it's rich porn.

00:44:56.000 And, uh...

00:44:57.000 My wife was telling me now, it's all just stories like, this show is too patriotic and we need more women of color and person of color.

00:45:06.000 It's just a fucking social justice blog.

00:45:08.000 Which is not what the original design was.

00:45:10.000 I don't like either of those, by the way.

00:45:12.000 But, she ruined the brand.

00:45:14.000 Same with Penthouse!

00:45:15.000 Penthouse US is an affirmative action hire.

00:45:17.000 It's a lesbian.

00:45:18.000 And she just puts her dyke friends in it.

00:45:19.000 There's nothing remotely sexy about Penthouse US.

00:45:23.000 And House Australia, on the other hand, is guest edited by yours truly.

00:45:26.000 Next issue.

00:45:27.000 I'll be going there for a tour, if I'm not banned.

00:45:32.000 So my point is, with the hound advice, is we need the opposite of that.

00:45:37.000 Of course there are incredible women in the workforce.

00:45:40.000 Barbara Corcoran is amazing.

00:45:43.000 She revolutionized New York real estate.

00:45:45.000 She got in there at the worst time ever, and it basically invented the whole idea of flipping.

00:45:50.000 And she did an incredible job right when New York City was booming, after we had Dinkins and Koch.

00:45:58.000 And it was a crime hellhole.

00:45:59.000 When Giuliani came in and started cleaning up, she rode that tidal wave, like a surfing beast monster riding a whale, and made a fucking fortune.

00:46:07.000 But I will say, even Barbara Corcoran, she realized she waited too late to have kids, and she ended up spending, I believe, $350,000 on In Vitro.

00:46:17.000 And, she's an old mom.

00:46:19.000 And as an old dad, I can tell you, it's frustrating.

00:46:22.000 Because my son wants me to chase him around the house, and I'm old and fat and beat.

00:46:26.000 And I'm in good shape, I box.

00:46:30.000 And Maggie Thatcher, and don't make me sit here and list.

00:46:33.000 I'm talking about general patterns here, and the general pattern is a lot of women just forego being housewives and having kids because they are brainwashed into thinking they gotta be a badass.

00:46:43.000 How many times have you heard that word?

00:46:45.000 Especially about the new, of all these new women in the house.

00:46:49.000 Yeah.

00:46:49.000 Here's some of your badass seats that got switched, and now they're badass.

00:46:54.000 Fuck off.

00:46:56.000 You're not a badass, okay?

00:46:58.000 You have to be scared of a badass.

00:47:00.000 I guess I am kind of scared of them in the sense that I'm scared of a crazy ex-girlfriend who's gonna run through a plate glass window and cut her hands up and start screaming.

00:47:09.000 It's not a Tony Soprano fear.

00:47:12.000 It's a stalker fear.

00:47:15.000 So, here is the moral of the story.

00:47:19.000 And I'm kind of- I shouldn't have lumped both of these together, but

00:47:22.000 I believe about 95% of women would be much happier at home.

00:47:27.000 You've got kids everywhere.

00:47:29.000 If you make more than the average American salary and you can afford a nanny, and the way people are hiring illegals all the time, I think most people can, if you can get a nanny in the mix, there's a lot of sitting on your ass.

00:47:40.000 There's a lot of brunch.

00:47:42.000 There's a lot of, uh, mimosas.

00:47:45.000 There's a lot of going to the gym and really taking your time to really do a slow workout.

00:47:49.000 Or something fake like yoga, which is just stretching.

00:47:51.000 And you're not working out.

00:47:53.000 I know it hurts sometimes.

00:47:54.000 Yeah, so does stretching.

00:47:56.000 There's a lot of killin' time.

00:47:57.000 And then by the time you're done your brunches and your gossiping and your silly walk that doesn't... You don't even break a sweat on.

00:48:03.000 But you got your little fuckin' nikes and your... Your little... What is that?

00:48:07.000 Quilted vest and your hat and your mitts on?

00:48:09.000 Goddammit, you look so ridiculous and just nattering away.

00:48:13.000 And then it's three o'clock, time to pick up the kids.

00:48:16.000 Or if you're upper middle class, the au pair will do that.

00:48:18.000 You can go out for more drinks.

00:48:21.000 I think a lot of women in affluent suburbs become severe alcoholics just out of boredom.

00:48:27.000 Because the nanny and the au pair are doing all the mothering.

00:48:31.000 I'm not saying being a housewife is boring.

00:48:34.000 Pay attention there.

00:48:35.000 I said when they farm out all the different tasks, it gets boring.

00:48:40.000 Don't farm out the tasks.

00:48:41.000 Love your babies.

00:48:42.000 Get involved in the community.

00:48:43.000 Charles Murray has a great article where he says, even women without kids should be stay-at-home women.

00:48:49.000 Because they enrich the community.

00:48:51.000 They talk about the local stop sign.

00:48:53.000 They're worried about the schools.

00:48:54.000 They're worried about the fact that on Main Street there's three stores that have been vacant for a while.

00:48:58.000 That's hurting our property value.

00:49:00.000 You know, they're taking care of the cave.

00:49:02.000 We go out and get the big game.

00:49:06.000 And I've seen hordes of whores who would have been much happier as housewives, but they chose to be in the workforce, and they're fucking miserable, and then they turn 40 and have a panic attack when they realize they waited too long to have kids, and they deeply regret it.

00:49:21.000 Ladies, from 30 to 35, the hourglass is being inverted, and you're running out of sand.

00:49:26.000 By 35, there's no sand in the hourglass.

00:49:28.000 Yeah, but my mom had a kid at 42.

00:49:31.000 Yeah, so did mine.

00:49:32.000 So did my wife.

00:49:33.000 It's very, very rare.

00:49:35.000 Talk to Barbara Corcoran.

00:49:38.000 If you are super driven, and you're destined to be a brain surgeon or an oncologist, or you just love doing sound for movies and working those horrible shifts, and you're one of those few women who can lift those big heavy sandbags, I can't tell you how many film sets we've had female PAs have to quit because they twisted an ankle.

00:49:57.000 Because they're always like, no, no, I got it, I got it, I got it.

00:50:00.000 Being a PA is a brutally hard physical exercise.

00:50:03.000 And women don't have the same upper body strength.

00:50:06.000 I'm sorry.

00:50:07.000 But say you are one of those driven women.

00:50:08.000 All the power to you, obviously.

00:50:10.000 I'm not advocating for Sharia law.

00:50:11.000 I'm not gonna start rounding up women in a paddy wagon and chaining them to a kitchen stove.

00:50:18.000 But just allow for the possibility that you're not meant to be in the workforce.

00:50:23.000 The workforce isn't that fun anyway.

00:50:25.000 Like, it's a pretty grumpy place.

00:50:27.000 I don't joke around that much at work.

00:50:28.000 In fact, half of my job is yelling at my producer, Ryan.

00:50:34.000 And then in DC, half of my job is getting yelled at by Ricky.

00:50:37.000 And Ricky, my producer over there, by the way, is a woman in the workforce who does an excellent job.

00:50:42.000 So obviously I'm not applying this to everyone.

00:50:44.000 She's very driven, but she's been doing this for a long time and she has a unique skill.

00:50:49.000 Like Kennedy from Fox Business News.

00:50:51.000 She's almost cursed in a way.

00:50:53.000 Because she has this great gift where she can just riff and write great monologues.

00:50:58.000 And she doesn't see her kids as much as she should.

00:51:00.000 Not as she should, but as she would if she was a stay-at-home mom.

00:51:02.000 But you'd be stupid not to take whatever she makes, half a million dollars, from Fox.

00:51:08.000 It's just sitting there on the table.

00:51:09.000 I have this talent, I better use it.

00:51:13.000 Um, so that's the first, that's the second part of this whole thing.

00:51:17.000 But the main part is Hipster Hacker Hustler.

00:51:21.000 So say you have a great idea and you feel really driven and you want to do something stupid like run a t-shirt company, which is the worst idea you could possibly have because you're competing with China.

00:51:32.000 But say you have an idea and you feel really inspired, then step one is to find the hacker and the hustler.

00:51:40.000 And this, yeah, the hacker and the hustler.

00:51:42.000 I'm saying that as the hipster guy.

00:51:44.000 If you're a hustler, you're not done.

00:51:46.000 You can't start on step one without those other two guys.

00:51:49.000 And no, you don't need a hound.

00:51:51.000 Sorry, hounds.

00:51:52.000 We don't need you.

00:51:55.000 And I would say,

00:51:57.000 Out of the hacker and the hustler, the sales guy's first.

00:52:01.000 So I have a great idea, I'm ready to rock, I don't care if it's a fucking restaurant.

00:52:05.000 You're nothing without the face, the sales dude, the guy talking to everyone, the guy shaking hands, pleasing everyone, taking everyone out for dinner, greasing the wheels.

00:52:15.000 The president, basically, of the company.

00:52:19.000 Um, alright, I think you got it.

00:52:22.000 And you keep plugging away for that, you do two years, you don't do anything stupid, you don't get sued into oblivion, or you don't, um, you don't become obsolete.

00:52:34.000 Like, Tower Records is a great documentary I highly recommend.

00:52:37.000 Oh, shit, that's a very other important detail, I'm glad I remembered.

00:52:40.000 Another important thing as you become a bigger company is always hire from the bottom up.

00:52:46.000 Like, some of the best executives I've worked with were interns.

00:52:53.000 The head of Warner Brothers in Canada used to mow lawns in front of Warner Brothers.

00:52:58.000 And that's why Tower Records was so successful.

00:53:00.000 You've got to understand, everyone thinks that they were killed by MP3s.

00:53:04.000 They've survived disco when no one wanted to buy their rock records.

00:53:08.000 They've switched over from vinyl to CD.

00:53:11.000 They've been through these switches before.

00:53:12.000 The reason Tower Records died is they stopped hiring from the ground up.

00:53:16.000 And they would just say, well, you went to business school.

00:53:18.000 You're the CEO of record stuff.

00:53:20.000 You don't mean you have a PhD in record stuff.

00:53:23.000 You come over here.

00:53:24.000 It lost the culture.

00:53:25.000 You lost the connection with the staff at the bottom, the blue collars, and the company.

00:53:30.000 The fabric of it starts to tear apart.

00:53:33.000 So yeah, that's another important detail.

00:53:36.000 Is that everyone at the top brass has to have started at the bottom, so you can relate to the bottom.

00:53:40.000 And I think that's a big problem with American corporate culture today, is these insane executive salaries, and these guys have never been on a factory floor in their life.

00:53:48.000 And the guys on the factory floor end up resenting them.

00:53:51.000 Hating them.

00:53:53.000 Especially because they do evil shit like send all the jobs off to Mexico.

00:53:58.000 I know I did say earlier that entrepreneurs have to always take the better deal, but can we at least try to stay within our borders?

00:54:05.000 But I was, one last thing I will say about the hustler, he's kind of your first job because you've got to get the money flowing in.

00:54:13.000 The computers can break and be broken for a couple days, I guess, but the money can't not be coming in.

00:54:18.000 So in order of importance to keep something going, I would say it goes.

00:54:22.000 I'd say the hipster, the creative type is the last.

00:54:25.000 Despite the fact that our culture, especially in New York, is a

00:54:29.000 Everyone needs to be creative.

00:54:29.000 Creative.

00:54:31.000 Red Bull, trying to hack creativity.

00:54:33.000 Yeah, we need, kids should go to creative shit.

00:54:36.000 If it's not in your genes, if it's not in your DNA, don't bother.

00:54:36.000 Why?

00:54:40.000 Don't force it, is my point.

00:54:42.000 So I would say the importance are...

00:54:44.000 Hustler, then hackers, less important, and then hipster.

00:54:48.000 There's always people interested in pop culture.

00:54:53.000 I like you more than a friend.

00:54:55.000 And this, this CRTV tonight, I've got seven people from the walk away movement.

00:55:04.000 Who left liberalism.

00:55:06.000 I know we lost the house to a bunch of chicks because women voted for women.

00:55:10.000 And ladies, by the way, thank you for voting.

00:55:12.000 I'm looking forward to more Justin Trudeaus with these women who only vote with their hearts and could care less about policy.

00:55:19.000 Way to vote!

00:55:22.000 That's so ridiculous.

00:55:24.000 Not one of them could name one of the policies of these women and women of color and POC.

00:55:30.000 They just like the way it looks.

00:55:32.000 Yeah, because you're broads.

00:55:35.000 You like things to look pretty.

00:55:36.000 Okay, it looks nice.

00:55:38.000 Now, what's going on with charter schools?

00:55:41.000 What's going on with the border?

00:55:42.000 What's going on with health care?

00:55:44.000 What's going on with birthright citizenship abuse?

00:55:48.000 How we doing with jobs?

00:55:49.000 You gonna raise taxes on all these corporations that are generating all this revenue for people?

00:55:53.000 You gonna kill some jobs for us?

00:55:55.000 Just like Justin Trudeau, a gorgeous hunk who was voted by women, strictly because he's a cutie, and he's ruined the country.

00:56:03.000 Perhaps irrevocably.

00:56:05.000 At least we got balls in the Senate.

00:56:09.000 Yeah, so I have seven of these walk-away people who left liberalism and didn't necessarily flock to the right.

00:56:17.000 I mean, they might be fiscally conservative and stuff, but a lot of them are sort of libertarian, they change the name to classic liberal, but all they know is the hysterical left of right now is something they want nothing to do with.

00:56:27.000 Alright, I like you more than a friend.

00:56:30.000 See you soon.

Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - November 07, 2018

Get Off My Lawn Podcast #95 | You need three things to get rich

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