Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - October 15, 2021


GOML LIVE #119 - ROCK RAP (Part 1)

Topics
vets
Hosted by
Gavin McInnes
Mentioned
Bubba Ryan Matty Odell Scared Puerto Ricans Jesus Christ Brandon Glock Dude Mike Rappaport Malcolm X Matt Owen Gigi Hank Michael Rappaport Pete Townshend Tactical Walls Ashley Babbitt Taneshi Coates Dave Chappelle and 16 more
S04E41 - YOU'RE A DOMESTIC TERRORIST S04E43 - THE GREAT RESET FORWARD

Episode Stats


Length

32 minutes

Words per minute

158.55

Word count

5,219

Sentence count

655

Harmful content

Misogyny

27

sentences flagged

Toxicity

150

sentences flagged

Hate speech

31

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

Gavin McInnes and Matty Odell are back in New York. Matty has a new t-shirt, and the boys talk about the best and worst albums of the 20th century. Plus, a call-in from a listener who wants to know if guns should be legalized in the US. Use Promo Code GAVIN20 for 20% off all orders! Subscribe to our new show on Apple Podcasts! Subscribe, Like, and Share to stay up to date with what's going on in the world of Gimlet and Gav and the rest of the Gimlet Media family. Thanks to our sponsor TacticalWalls for sponsoring the show. The show is free for the first half of the show, and then we take calls behind the paywall to punish you for being so cheap that you will not pay for the show! Use the promo code GavIN20 at checkout to get 20% all year long. Gavin20% off the entire Gavins 20-piece Spring Cleaning Set. If you like what you hear, please HIT SUBSCRIBE and become a patron! It helps us make more episodes like this one more accessible to more people! Thank you, Matty and the gang! See you next week on Gimlet. Matty & the boys are back with a new episode of Get Off My Lawn Live from New York, where we'll be talking about all things Gavyn's Lawn! on Tuesday, March 5th, 2020. Get off My Lawn! Get off my lawn! Get on my lawn and get off my Lawn and get on my Lawn. . . . And stay safe! -Gavyn and the crew are here! Cheers. -Matty & Ryan - Matty Matt & the crew at the road! Matt & Brandon and the guys at the show . And much more! Thanks, Matt & the gang at the Keg is not in the next episode of GAVin' it's a good one. Matt and the next one! And we'll see you soon! GAVyn & the rest Tim and Ryan - Thanks so much for listening to the live show - Matt & Ben Ben and the team at The Keg, Ben - Ben and Ryan,

Transcript

Transcripts from "Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes" are sourced from the Knowledge Fight Interactive Search Tool. Explore them interactively here.
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
Topics generated with Qwen2.5-3B-Instruct.
Hosts, guests, and mentioned names generated with spaCy (en_core_web_sm), reconciled against Wikidata.
00:00:13.000 Live from New York, it's Get Off My Lawn with Gavin McInnes.
00:00:20.000 Don't you get embarrassed when you read the precious things you said many, many years ago
00:00:51.000 Cry if you want!
00:00:54.000 That's the who.
00:00:56.000 It's Hard.
00:00:57.000 Put out when Pete Townshend was working on his gay album.
00:01:02.000 Uh, Rough Boys.
00:01:03.000 Oh, I got the wrong glasses on.
00:01:04.000 Can you go get my cool glasses?
00:01:07.000 Where, uh, he goes, ROUGH BOYS! 1.00
00:01:09.000 OUT ON THE STREETS! 1.00
00:01:10.000 I'M GONNA SUCK AND TASTE YA! 1.00
00:01:13.000 So he didn't have a lot of time for It's Hard. 0.99
00:01:16.000 It's weird that it's called It's Hard, too.
00:01:19.000 Ryan, can you get my lunettes?
00:01:23.000 It's French.
00:01:24.000 They're on my desk in my glasses case.
00:01:27.000 I wanted to match this wonderful t-shirt.
00:01:30.000 A lot of t-shirts coming out. 0.95
00:01:32.000 The Let's Go Brandon shirts are fucking spelled wrong. 0.99
00:01:37.000 I just realized, thanks to a baby monster. 0.98
00:01:40.000 They... Let's has an apostrophe.
00:01:44.000 So the good news is this first run of shirts will be like those collector stamps where the plane is upside down and they're worth three million dollars.
00:01:51.000 The first run of these t-shirts has a typo.
00:01:54.000 And that'll be amazing.
00:01:55.000 But yeah, it's hard.
00:01:56.000 Terrible album.
00:01:57.000 I loved it because I was a little kid.
00:01:59.000 I was like 13 when it came out.
00:02:01.000 And back then you just take whatever record you're lucky enough to get and you listen to it 700 times until it's the best album ever.
00:02:08.000 Whether it is or not.
00:02:10.000 Welcome to Matty Odell.
00:02:11.000 What's up everybody?
00:02:12.000 Back.
00:02:13.000 Heart is in working order.
00:02:15.000 Cheers.
00:02:16.000 The keg is not.
00:02:17.000 We're at the bottom of the keg.
00:02:18.000 We're getting a lot of fuzz.
00:02:21.000 This is the live episode.
00:02:23.000 It's free for the first half hour.
00:02:25.000 We go through the mailbag and then we take calls.
00:02:29.000 But we take calls behind the paywall to punish you for being so cheap that you will not pay for the show.
00:02:36.000 Thank one of our oldest sponsor veteran owned tactical wall. 1.00
00:02:40.000 Ryan, what the fuck is on your feet? 1.00
00:02:46.000 Why don't you show the camera the disgusting fucking stupid? 1.00
00:02:49.000 Dude, you're short and short people can't afford to wear big fat wide shoes. 1.00
00:02:57.000 Croc boat shoes?
00:03:02.000 Oh boy.
00:03:04.000 Yeah, I know you can bend them, that's the problem. 1.00
00:03:08.000 What the fuck? 0.99
00:03:10.000 And then you have socks, little girly bobby socks, and you're wearing women's jeans? 1.00
00:03:15.000 What jeans are those?
00:03:16.000 Mom jeans.
00:03:18.000 Think Aeropostale?
00:03:19.000 Mom jeans?
00:03:19.000 They're daughter jeans.
00:03:21.000 What are they called?
00:03:22.000 I think they're Aeropostale.
00:03:25.000 For Hollister?
00:03:26.000 They stretch.
00:03:28.000 You're wearing a hot 19-year-old girl's pants. 1.00
00:03:33.000 You're wearing shoes.
00:03:34.000 I guess I could forgive if the guy was like a rich fisherman, but not really.
00:03:39.000 And then you have a decent shirt on that I gave you because I accidentally shrank it. 1.00
00:03:45.000 See, you look like an idiot. 1.00
00:03:46.000 But yes, Tactical Walls, veteran-owned. 1.00
00:03:49.000 Hide your guns, hide your kids, hide your wife, says our copywriter, who I'm no longer reading from.
00:03:55.000 TacticalWalls.com, best products in America.
00:03:57.000 We were just talking about it, actually, about all the wonderful things we wish we could have if we were to have guns.
00:04:03.000 We use ours for baseball bats and machetes and other legal things here in the South Bronx.
00:04:09.000 But you people in free states can have... What are those guns up there, Matty?
00:04:14.000 You got a couple of variations of the M4 or AR-15.
00:04:18.000 The one with the blocky stock just above your head, that's a SCAR-17 Heavy.
00:04:25.000 A SCAR-17 Heavy?
00:04:27.000 Yeah.
00:04:28.000 It's beautiful.
00:04:29.000 Oh yeah.
00:04:29.000 Does that go... Or do you have to go... It is a no joke weapon.
00:04:35.000 But as far as the bullets go, do you have to pull a trigger for every bullet?
00:04:38.000 It can be full auto.
00:04:39.000 Oh really?
00:04:39.000 Yeah.
00:04:44.000 I just saw a cop... I just saw a cop got shot with a full-auto handgun.
00:04:58.000 Use the promo code GAVIN for 20% off all orders.
00:05:01.000 That is tacticalwalls.com.
00:05:05.000 Promo code GAVIN, 20% off.
00:05:07.000 We had Tim on the show before.
00:05:09.000 He's got... It's not... It's...
00:05:12.000 Primarily a fantastic place to mount your guns, but it's also great for sports, to put your fire shit on, to put up your... Oh, they also do great things for your cars, great places to hide guns, mirrors where you push a little thing and there's a gun behind the mirror, a Kleenex box, shells that hide things. 0.90
00:05:32.000 Clocks. 0.86
00:05:33.000 What?
00:05:33.000 There's a clock, too.
00:05:34.000 A clock you can hide your gun in? 0.69
00:05:36.000 Just fantastic places to hide your gun, so you don't have to worry about people knowing what your arsenal is, unless, of course, they cross a line and you have to blow their head off.
00:05:44.000 The Glock clock.
00:05:47.000 The Glock clock.
00:05:48.000 Now, I made that up, but they can use that if they'd like to.
00:05:52.000 Tim, if you're listening, 1410 wall clock is not very catchy.
00:05:59.000 It should be called the Glock clock.
00:06:01.000 That's right.
00:06:03.000 All right, let's start the show.
00:06:05.000 What should we talk about?
00:06:09.000 Bannon's possibly going to get arrested.
00:06:12.000 Says who? 0.65
00:06:12.000 They're going to vote on Tuesday, I think, to see if he's in contempt. 0.65
00:06:17.000 This is all about January 6th, because he didn't show up to a hearing about January 6th.
00:06:22.000 The ultimate nothing burger.
00:06:24.000 The January 6th meandering.
00:06:26.000 I'm fascinated by all of the libs who are still obsessed with January 6th.
00:06:33.000 I understand the day of, even a week after, going, ooh, it's so scary.
00:06:38.000 But after we've come through zero evidence, they're getting trespassing, they're still pushing it. 0.99
00:06:45.000 Like it's the fucking smoking gun. 0.99
00:06:47.000 Meanwhile, the only smoking gun was the gun that blew Ashley Babbitt away by some retard affirmative action hire who regularly left his gun in the bathroom. 1.00
00:06:56.000 What? 1.00
00:06:58.000 And wore a stupid pocket square with a matching tie. 1.00
00:07:01.000 This is good news, though. 1.00
00:07:02.000 A judge held two D.C.
00:07:06.000 officials in contempt after they left a Capitol riot suspect with a broken wrist for four months without surgery. 0.98
00:07:12.000 Like that couple on fucking Tucker who were old vet farmers that lost everything to defend themselves when they weren't even there. 1.00
00:07:20.000 Or that poor bitch in Alaska where the SWAT team shows up. 1.00
00:07:24.000 God knows how long it took them to get there. 0.99
00:07:26.000 She was not near an airport.
00:07:28.000 So they flew into... What's the big place in Alaska called?
00:07:33.000 Anchorage?
00:07:34.000 Anchorage? 1.00
00:07:34.000 They flew into Anchorage, then they had to take a fucking one-prop plane to some other buttfuck town, and then they had to drive for six hours to eventually get to her cabin in the middle of nowhere, kick her door down, and she's like, I wasn't even there, morons. 1.00
00:07:48.000 This is the worst FBI in history. 1.00
00:07:52.000 Is it the FBI?
00:07:52.000 I mean, I don't even know who's in control of the investigation.
00:07:55.000 Is it the Secret Service?
00:07:56.000 Is it the Capitol Police?
00:07:57.000 Is it the FBI?
00:07:58.000 I mean... It's not the Capitol Police.
00:08:00.000 It's the FBI, the CIA.
00:08:02.000 I don't know.
00:08:02.000 How much did they spend throwing you in jail?
00:08:07.000 Oh, my one case was two million dollars.
00:08:09.000 Two million dollars to get Matty O off the streets.
00:08:12.000 Look, I hate him as much as everyone else does, but I'd probably pay $200 to get him off the streets.
00:08:20.000 And I think it's the FBI!
00:08:23.000 Oh my god!
00:08:24.000 Taneshi Coates is on the show!
00:08:27.000 And I think I know why.
00:08:31.000 Taneshi, besides that catchphrase you keep doing, which I think I know why, what would you say the impetus is for the left being so fixated on January 6th?
00:08:40.000 I think that it happened in July.
00:08:44.000 No, it was January 6th.
00:08:45.000 It was a cold day.
00:08:49.000 Yep.
00:08:52.000 You know what I noticed?
00:08:54.000 That guy had nothing. 0.98
00:08:55.000 When you were looking up his face, that guy from the Raiders who got in shit for saying that dude had big lips, Taneshi Coates' lips are so huge that if you were to draw a realistic drawing of him, you'd get in trouble for making a racist caricature. 0.99
00:09:10.000 Your pen would cancel you. 0.98
00:09:13.000 He has bike tires for lips. 0.81
00:09:15.000 They are insane.
00:09:17.000 That's photoshopped to shrink. 1.00
00:09:22.000 They look like a nice pussy, though, if it was on its side. 1.00
00:09:26.000 I could flip it. 1.00
00:09:27.000 Let's flip it up.
00:09:29.000 Flip it up and stick it on a vag. 0.74
00:09:32.000 That's a ZZ Top song. 1.00
00:09:34.000 Flip it up and stick his fucking lips on a vag. 1.00
00:09:40.000 You got tenacious coats. 1.00
00:09:43.000 His fucking mouth looks like the sweetest pussy lips. 1.00
00:09:47.000 We all know the song. 1.00
00:09:48.000 Yeah, we're familiar with it.
00:09:49.000 I don't think we guys need to hear any more.
00:09:52.000 Let's dive into the mailbag.
00:09:54.000 Although we all already have to get to our second sponsor.
00:09:57.000 That's how much we cram in.
00:09:58.000 That's why I don't really do any news items for the free show because by the time you start talking about something like the January 6th meandering, it's time for another sponsor.
00:10:07.000 So we have to keep it light and silly.
00:10:09.000 Look at my new computer.
00:10:11.000 Wait, your password is required to enable Touch ID. 0.97
00:10:14.000 Well, why the fuck do I have Touch ID then? 1.00
00:10:18.000 Shut up, you don't have a dad. 1.00
00:10:22.000 Let's turn our eyes to Gavin's mailbag. 1.00
00:10:27.000 Let me touch it.
00:10:31.000 Ink toner's low.
00:10:34.000 That's a message I got.
00:10:36.000 Oh, for your printer?
00:10:38.000 Yeah.
00:10:41.000 I can't believe we spelt let's go Brandon wrong.
00:10:44.000 Yeah.
00:10:45.000 I'm so embarrassed.
00:10:47.000 And the most embarrassing thing about it too is they go, dude, you spelled let's go Brandon wrong.
00:10:52.000 And I said, no, we didn't. 0.88
00:10:53.000 And I combed through it for three hours, like fucking Indiana Jones, trying to decipher some hieroglyphics. 0.98
00:11:00.000 Nope. 0.98
00:11:01.000 I forgot an apostrophe.
00:11:04.000 We have some cool new shirts too for the bird which is the bald eagle.
00:11:09.000 Speaking of which, we've got a lot of busy bees out there tormenting the internet with the bird which is the bald eagle.
00:11:17.000 Oh my god.
00:11:17.000 We have a bunch.
00:11:18.000 You know what's funny is we set our baby monster bees out into the internet and said, comment on people's shit and say things like, I think I know why. 0.96
00:11:29.000 and the bird which is the bald eagle and getting good at it if you will and all our stupid inside jokes and now our social media is destroyed yes every time I post on getter or something it's I think I know why oh yeah I get it all on my socials everything did you see these brand new shirts though we're working on it's just called t-shirts Ryan it arrived at 702 p.m. 0.97
00:11:55.000 I think I want to make these just a little circle above the left tit.
00:11:59.000 Classy one.
00:12:01.000 Ooh, we should do them fluorescent orange.
00:12:04.000 Do you know what I'm talking about?
00:12:05.000 Mm-hmm.
00:12:06.000 Hi-viz.
00:12:08.000 Hi-viz?
00:12:09.000 Yeah, fluorescent.
00:12:10.000 Oh, right, right, right.
00:12:11.000 Okay.
00:12:12.000 No, that's a different shirt.
00:12:13.000 That shirt will be Get Off My Lawn lawn care. 1.00
00:12:16.000 Can you find... yeah.
00:12:17.000 Those look pretty cool, right?
00:12:19.000 Oh yeah.
00:12:19.000 Hell yeah.
00:12:20.000 The bird, which is the bald eagle.
00:12:21.000 The bird, which is the bald eagle.
00:12:23.000 It's hard to pick which one I'd buy.
00:12:25.000 Well, it depends on the color of the shirt, my friend.
00:12:27.000 Ah.
00:12:28.000 Like, if it's navy blue, you want one of the top ones.
00:12:32.000 And then here's the corrected version.
00:12:35.000 Yeah.
00:12:37.000 So get a let's go Brandon shirt now while you can, and you can be one of the few who has the typo.
00:12:44.000 It's not worth a lot today, but in about 70 years, your grandchildren will be able to buy a $7 million house, which will be a tiny house at the time.
00:12:55.000 We've got a, uh, a sponsor that's back.
00:12:58.000 Veteran owned.
00:13:01.000 BeardVet has a great beard grooming and coffee.
00:13:04.000 Check out the Oktoberfest sale.
00:13:06.000 El Diablo coffee blend, Brazilian roast blend, all on sale.
00:13:10.000 Plus, free shipping on all orders when you go to www.beardvet.com.
00:13:19.000 That's not enough.
00:13:20.000 When you use promo code Gavin, you get an additional 15% off.
00:13:23.000 Check out BeardVet and tell them Gavin sent you.
00:13:27.000 Sean, the owner of BeardVet is one of us.
00:13:28.000 He's a good egg and we like him more than a friend.
00:13:30.000 Like most of our sponsors, BeardVet is clearly a veteran owned company.
00:13:35.000 We support them and they support us.
00:13:37.000 That's BeardVet.com.
00:13:40.000 Promo code Gavin for 50% off all orders and Christmas giveaways.
00:13:47.000 Look at that stuff.
00:13:48.000 You know, it's funny that vets seem to be the only ones working in America these days, because they have the discipline from the army, and when they're told they don't have to go to work, and they're told they can get a stimulus check, and they're told they could probably stay home, they go, I'd rather not, thanks. 0.85
00:14:02.000 I'd rather just bust my ass and make something, because that's what I do.
00:14:06.000 I have discipline. 1.00
00:14:07.000 The rest of us just go, nah, I'm going to sit on my fucking ass and let America rot. 1.00
00:14:15.000 I was at a pharmacy today to get a toothbrush and some toothpaste and it was empty. 1.00
00:14:19.000 Go to my getter account.
00:14:22.000 There was nothing on the shelves.
00:14:23.000 Yeah, that's true.
00:14:24.000 After making fun of Venezuela forever, our shelves are starting to look similar. 0.95
00:14:29.000 Then I went to Dick's. 0.99
00:14:32.000 Which is a male strip club in my area because I just, I'm not gay, but I wanted to just blow a black guy just to let some steam off. 1.00
00:14:39.000 Is that the store where they sell you? 0.99
00:14:45.000 Sporting goods. 0.99
00:14:46.000 The dicks, no, dicks called, they want their you back? 0.99
00:14:51.000 That's pretty good, they're all sold out of you. 0.99
00:14:55.000 Now, maybe Dix is like moving inventory or something and I'm missing something, but no.
00:14:59.000 So that's the drugstore in the South Bronx. 1.00
00:15:01.000 Look at that shit. 1.00
00:15:02.000 That's so, it doesn't have a Cuban vibe. 1.00
00:15:05.000 Yeah, it has a bodega.
00:15:07.000 We have so much tooth.
00:15:08.000 How much?
00:15:09.000 What do you mean there's not enough?
00:15:10.000 There's like seven different toothbrush.
00:15:12.000 How many teeth you got?
00:15:14.000 Yeah, you can get a toothbrush.
00:15:16.000 This is America.
00:15:17.000 We want 300 different toothbrushes.
00:15:20.000 I heard some foreigner comedian going, you people here in America, you have an aisle for cereal, a whole aisle. 1.00
00:15:29.000 And I'm like, yeah, bitch, we got a fucking aisle of cereal, motherfucker. 1.00
00:15:35.000 Candy, cereal, Cheerios. 1.00
00:15:37.000 Jesus Christ.
00:15:38.000 Look at that. 1.00
00:15:38.000 We got two baskets of stupid balls. 1.00
00:15:40.000 Nobody wants some shorts. 1.00
00:15:43.000 And that's it.
00:15:45.000 Some boxes that aren't unpacked.
00:15:46.000 That's the other problem is you can't get anyone to come help.
00:15:49.000 Right now.
00:15:51.000 I was looking for a driver at Dick's.
00:15:53.000 I wanted to get to the Tiger Woods one. 0.90
00:15:55.000 It's called like the X Rev 5 or some shit.
00:15:59.000 And he goes, well, we have the X Max.
00:16:01.000 And I go, OK, what's the difference?
00:16:02.000 It's a little stiffer than the Tiger Woods one you're looking for.
00:16:05.000 Oh, OK.
00:16:06.000 And he goes, hold on.
00:16:06.000 I'll check in the back to see if we have any.
00:16:08.000 This is the kind of worker that's left.
00:16:10.000 Just an old drunk who wasn't there for his kids.
00:16:13.000 And he got arrested with a DUI.
00:16:15.000 And he showed up there in a daze.
00:16:17.000 He's probably still drunk from the night before.
00:16:19.000 He's gone in the back room for 12 minutes, probably sucking on the Mickey that's in his top drawer.
00:16:23.000 And he comes back and he goes, nope.
00:16:25.000 And I go, what about this one?
00:16:26.000 He goes, that's a display.
00:16:27.000 And I go, what about the 13 that are next to it? 0.98
00:16:31.000 He had missed an entire display that was in the fucking back. 0.98
00:16:36.000 And I go, he's an old dude. 0.99
00:16:38.000 I go, what's the matter with you, Bill?
00:16:39.000 It has his name on there.
00:16:42.000 And he goes, well, I didn't see it there.
00:16:43.000 And I'm like, you walked directly by a massive display that exclusively displays the drivers that I'm looking for.
00:16:54.000 And you poo-poo this discovery like it doesn't exist.
00:16:57.000 Not that he doesn't walk around the store all day.
00:17:02.000 I don't need you.
00:17:03.000 No.
00:17:04.000 Leave. 0.99
00:17:05.000 Let me go back there.
00:17:06.000 You're supposed to be better than nothing, dude.
00:17:09.000 You're not better than nothing. 1.00
00:17:11.000 Yo, this guy sounds like a piece of garbage piece of frickin' crap. 1.00
00:17:15.000 Mike Rappaport? 1.00
00:17:16.000 Oh my god, Michael Rappaport. 1.00
00:17:17.000 Yeah, this dude sounds like a piece of dirt crap, dude. 1.00
00:17:21.000 What are you a frickin' dick, dude? 1.00
00:17:23.000 Get the hell out of here with your frickin' motherfrickin' shit. 1.00
00:17:28.000 Mike, I'm so glad that we got you on the show. 1.00
00:17:30.000 We don't usually get major guests like this, but I couldn't help but notice you moved to L.A.
00:17:34.000 when you were 18, which was probably like 40 years ago.
00:17:41.000 What's with the New York accent?
00:17:43.000 Dude, you know, I was born in New York, bro.
00:17:47.000 Dude, I got freaking rap in my name, bro.
00:17:51.000 Dude, I knew so many... How many rappers you know, dude? 0.99
00:17:54.000 You motherfreaking... Get the freak out of here. 1.00
00:17:57.000 I think you would say fuck. 1.00
00:17:59.000 Yeah, I'm trying to. 1.00
00:18:00.000 The Beastie Boys, I guess, are your friends, and that makes you eternally New York-y, but... Dude, New York Jews is like, dude, who do you think bagels is from? 1.00
00:18:11.000 I feel like if you moved to Scotland when you were 18, and you are whatever you are now, 55, you'd have a Scottish accent.
00:18:18.000 Like, it's so phony.
00:18:20.000 You're like Coco Diaz and all these other phony New Yorkers who go to L.A. 1.00
00:18:23.000 and play up their wise guy shit. 1.00
00:18:25.000 What the fuck? 1.00
00:18:26.000 To be fair, ACDC, yeah, they moved to, uh, freaking, what'd you call it? 1.00
00:18:31.000 Australia?
00:18:32.000 Yeah, Australia. 0.99
00:18:33.000 They sound like a bunch of Australian freaking dudes, like a dingo. 1.00
00:18:36.000 Sheesh. 0.99
00:18:38.000 It's clean rapaport.
00:18:41.000 I like that.
00:18:41.000 You know what I seen here?
00:18:43.000 What?
00:18:44.000 I went to the Halloween store today and look at this, what they got here.
00:18:48.000 It's not a real spider, Ryan.
00:18:49.000 You don't have to be scared.
00:18:50.000 When you open it, but it jumps up at you, right?
00:18:53.000 So look at that.
00:18:55.000 Your IQ is perfect for those kinds of things.
00:18:57.000 Dude, it's scary.
00:18:58.000 Oh, a spider!
00:18:59.000 This is in the Bronx, so it scares everybody who walks in.
00:19:03.000 Oh yeah, Puerto Rican. 0.63
00:19:04.000 My wife is like, don't, no, don't do that. 1.00
00:19:06.000 Somebody, I'm like, no, I have to do this.
00:19:08.000 So there's just a bunch of, there's one.
00:19:12.000 White people are probably the least scared.
00:19:15.000 They get past it.
00:19:16.000 Okay.
00:19:17.000 I think this is a good one. 0.99
00:19:18.000 Am I racist for assuming that Puerto Ricans and blacks are gonna be the worst? 0.99
00:19:22.000 Puerto Ricans are gonna be the most scared and blacks are gonna like break the windows with fear. 1.00
00:19:26.000 There was this black dude. 0.99
00:19:27.000 He's pretty calm.
00:19:30.000 This is the best one.
00:19:32.000 And you were right, your theory prevails.
00:19:34.000 There's no idea.
00:19:35.000 Yo.
00:19:36.000 The spider's resetting.
00:19:37.000 Yo, is that a real spider, yo?
00:19:40.000 He gets his kids in first.
00:19:42.000 Well, they lived.
00:19:44.000 Oh no, he's got his baby.
00:19:46.000 No.
00:19:52.000 Did he make sure his entire family got in first?
00:19:55.000 Yeah.
00:19:55.000 To see if they die?
00:19:56.000 Right, yes.
00:19:57.000 From the spider bites?
00:19:58.000 They all knew it was there too, they were all looking.
00:20:00.000 Yeah, he sacrificed everybody.
00:20:03.000 Wow, so you're a real roving reporter this episode.
00:20:05.000 Yes, I was out and about.
00:20:06.000 And on the street.
00:20:07.000 Look at you go.
00:20:09.000 And I got a skeleton for us.
00:20:11.000 Let's see.
00:20:12.000 Wow, you really know how to spend money.
00:20:14.000 Oh, he's hidden.
00:20:18.000 This is Ryan on his day off.
00:20:21.000 He films Scared Puerto Ricans and buys- goes to a Halloween store and buys what?
00:20:27.000 A $2 skeleton?
00:20:28.000 Did you buy anything else?
00:20:29.000 $3.
00:20:29.000 I didn't buy anything else.
00:20:32.000 This was the only good thing there.
00:20:33.000 Did your wife? 0.98
00:20:35.000 No, she didn't freaking buy- dude, she's a freaking adult! 1.00
00:20:38.000 So you guys made the trek all the way to the fucking Halloween store. 0.99
00:20:43.000 You filmed people, you wandered around, and then you came back with a $2 skeleton. 1.00
00:20:49.000 Well dude, it was a freaking afterthought.
00:20:54.000 We were there for White Castle.
00:20:56.000 Okay.
00:20:57.000 Jesus.
00:20:58.000 It's what we craved.
00:20:59.000 So did you see the- alright.
00:21:00.000 I don't know if you- this is the least exciting one.
00:21:02.000 They get better and better as- I mean- We already showed this, dude.
00:21:05.000 Not this one.
00:21:06.000 This is the show Matt and the Blonde.
00:21:08.000 Thank you.
00:21:08.000 Very popular.
00:21:09.000 A dime short.
00:21:10.000 Hey Matt, what are your thoughts on the bird, which is the bald eagle?
00:21:14.000 What about it?
00:21:15.000 Just- is it cool?
00:21:17.000 I don't know.
00:21:18.000 They're pretty majestic.
00:21:20.000 I'm sure you have a lot of bald eagles in your neck of the woods.
00:21:22.000 I see a lot around here.
00:21:23.000 So many.
00:21:24.000 And they are predatory species.
00:21:26.000 Remember when everybody thought that they were in danger?
00:21:28.000 They were in danger.
00:21:30.000 Wow, they really got into it.
00:21:32.000 The bird!
00:21:34.000 So that one's not so exciting.
00:21:36.000 This one's very exciting.
00:21:37.000 I'm saving the best for last.
00:21:38.000 And you're going to flip, I believe.
00:21:40.000 This one's really good.
00:21:41.000 Last thing, let's not forget our national bird.
00:21:45.000 The bird, which is the bald eagle?
00:21:48.000 So thank you, Owen.
00:21:48.000 I appreciate you.
00:21:51.000 All right.
00:21:54.000 Thank you for the call.
00:21:56.000 We have some new friends in the studio.
00:21:59.000 We should probably explain to them what the bird, which is the bald eagle, is.
00:22:02.000 It's worth updating people regularly, especially if there's some sort of alien invasion or these shows are archived and they're discovered 7,000 years later.
00:22:12.000 Hey aliens, there was a ridiculous drug dealing loser who got in an altercation with police and died.
00:22:19.000 It was an irrelevant detail in our history but for some reason half the country decided that this loser was a saint and he was murdered by the police and it was indicative of a pattern so they burnt down the entire country, the best country in the world, America, 0.98
00:22:37.000 And there's statues for him.
00:22:38.000 He was Jesus Christ.
00:22:39.000 He became Jesus Christ overnight.
00:22:42.000 And he has children everywhere. 1.00
00:22:44.000 His family is just a retarded sprawl. 1.00
00:22:47.000 But his brother, who is literally named Folonius, which you may want to look up on an Earth dictionary. 0.92
00:22:53.000 It's not a compliment.
00:22:55.000 He was told by his lawyer to get up and say, look man, we have endangered species.
00:23:01.000 We have the bald eagle on the endangered species list.
00:23:04.000 Yet we don't have the black man. 0.99
00:23:06.000 Why is the bald eagle considered an endangered species and the black man is not?
00:23:13.000 His lawyer and him went through it 700 times.
00:23:16.000 He hits the mic and he goes, the bird, which is the bald eagle.
00:23:21.000 Take the bird, which is the bald eagle.
00:23:25.000 And when he fucks it up, you can see it break his lawyer's heart. 1.00
00:23:28.000 Yeah, he just looks over and I'm like, oh, fuck off. 1.00
00:23:30.000 That's not what we rehearsed. 1.00
00:23:32.000 Oh, fuck. 1.00
00:23:33.000 Look at Malcolm X behind him, too. 1.00
00:23:35.000 Red.
00:23:36.000 Remember Malcolm X was called Red?
00:23:37.000 He's a red bone.
00:23:39.000 He's a literally red bone.
00:23:41.000 Hi-yella.
00:23:42.000 I should have changed my name to Gavin X after Vice.
00:23:44.000 That is pretty dope.
00:23:45.000 This one you could, I dropped it to myself so that way it's better quality.
00:23:49.000 You could see Schroyer's face.
00:23:51.000 Which is the bald eagle.
00:23:53.000 So thank you, Owen.
00:23:54.000 I appreciate you.
00:23:55.000 All right, thank you for the call.
00:23:58.000 I don't like when people's beards are more important than their mustache.
00:24:01.000 Interesting.
00:24:02.000 Now this is the grand finale.
00:24:03.000 He's got to either trim his beard or get a new mustache.
00:24:06.000 This is my, I'm obsessed with this person.
00:24:07.000 Hey Gavin, it's Gigi Gorgeous here.
00:24:09.000 I have a very unique and special request from your friend, Jake.
00:24:14.000 He wanted me to tell you that you are like the bird, which is the bald eagleton.
00:24:21.000 I have no idea what that means, but he said that your advice and examples of how to be a better person help him, and I just wanted to let you know that I love you, and yeah, I hope this message serves you well.
00:24:33.000 Stay gorgeous.
00:24:34.000 Hey Gigi, you want to be a better person?
00:24:36.000 Don't break your father's heart by being you.
00:24:40.000 The broken heart, which is my father's.
00:24:43.000 She and her husband went to a gynecologist
00:24:50.000 We're good to go. 1.00
00:25:10.000 Has a cunt, because she is. 1.00
00:25:14.000 And the gynecologist dared to think outside the box and said, what about you take your penis, madam, and put it in your husband's vagina? 1.00
00:25:24.000 Sir? 1.00
00:25:26.000 I don't know if you know this, but you're in a heterosexual relationship.
00:25:30.000 You're basically a glam rocker in the band Skid Row, and your husband is a tomboy. 0.99
00:25:38.000 Who had her tits removed, by the way, at Gigi's behest. 1.00
00:25:41.000 Speaking of tomboy, last submission from my Ryan Censored TV account. 0.99
00:25:46.000 You're TikTok famous yet again.
00:25:50.000 Women do earn less in America because they choose to. 1.00
00:25:55.000 They would rather go to their daughter's piano recital than stay all night at work working on a, you know, proposal.
00:26:02.000 So they end up earning less, they're less ambitious, and I think this is sort of God's way, this is nature's way of saying women should be at home with the kids. 0.99
00:26:10.000 They're happier there.
00:26:11.000 These women are happier at home. 1.00
00:26:20.000 Wait a minute.
00:26:20.000 Wait a minute.
00:26:22.000 The way those memes things are supposed to go is, you're ugly, you're a loser, no one wants to fuck you, and it's a nerdy looking girl, and then she goes like, hold up, and then 1.00
00:26:33.000 Two hours in the mirror and she has her hair did and she's like, oh really who's ugly now bitch. 1.00
00:26:39.000 Yeah This woman takes me saying very true things about women Which I'm totally proud of think like there's nothing worse than people repeating shit that you didn't mean and taking it out of context and 0.99
00:26:51.000 And going, this guy thinks blacks need to go back to Africa and you're running around trying to put up fires going, no, no, no, no, no, no. 0.77
00:26:56.000 But that's exactly what I said in the perfect context. 0.96
00:27:00.000 Yes, nailed it.
00:27:01.000 I couldn't be happier. 1.00
00:27:02.000 I don't even like, I don't even regret one syllable of that rant, but your slam dunk is to change your shirt from a short sleeve shirt to a long sleeve shirt and put some dumb shit on your head. 1.00
00:27:17.000 It's like a, it's not even a real band. 0.99
00:27:20.000 It's like a filter or something.
00:27:21.000 Oh really?
00:27:22.000 Yeah.
00:27:23.000 So what's the impact here?
00:27:25.000 I don't understand.
00:27:25.000 What changed?
00:27:27.000 Nothing.
00:27:27.000 From the pre this to that.
00:27:29.000 And then she does this dumb, or he does this dumb punch. 0.99
00:27:32.000 Is that a guy? 0.99
00:27:33.000 Yeah.
00:27:35.000 Wait, what?
00:27:36.000 Yeah.
00:27:38.000 I mean.
00:27:39.000 Well, wait a minute.
00:27:39.000 I shouldn't say that.
00:27:40.000 I assumed cause she said.
00:27:42.000 It's when she talks.
00:27:44.000 That's a chick. 1.00
00:27:45.000 So wait, go back to the video?
00:27:46.000 What's her beef? 1.00
00:28:08.000 You're saying that the... Oh, I get it.
00:28:09.000 She identifies as a man.
00:28:12.000 So the cis dudes, I got scared.
00:28:14.000 I got confused by the word cis.
00:28:15.000 The cis dudes say, why do you care?
00:28:17.000 You're a man now.
00:28:20.000 Which is a good point.
00:28:24.000 Why does it matter?
00:28:26.000 Oh, and then she goes bang into a chick. 1.00
00:28:29.000 I don't even understand these fucking young people. 1.00
00:28:31.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:28:33.000 Oh. 0.99
00:28:34.000 Like, at least when we were annoying, our fathers understood the annoying shit we were saying. 0.99
00:28:41.000 I was saying shit to my dad like, you don't understand the working man. 0.99
00:28:45.000 Communism is the only way the working man can be empowered, dad. 1.00
00:28:48.000 He'd go, fuck you, you've had one fucking job in your life, you stupid cunt. 1.00
00:28:53.000 I'd watch out, dude. 1.00
00:28:54.000 That's a valid argument. 0.88
00:28:55.000 Her off of her meds, she turns into an anime character that kills people riding a motorcycle with red eyes. 0.99
00:29:00.000 I'm not scared of Japanese villains.
00:29:02.000 Okay.
00:29:02.000 When I was in Japan, I kept seeing the Yakuza and I just felt like slapping them.
00:29:07.000 Their punch perms and... Yeah, with their little suits on.
00:29:10.000 They look like Prince's manager.
00:29:12.000 What are you gonna do?
00:29:14.000 I mean, I hear they chop off someone's finger.
00:29:16.000 Yeah, probably voluntarily as part of some initiation thing.
00:29:20.000 Initiation.
00:29:21.000 Very difficult initiation.
00:29:22.000 All right, we're past the half hour mark.
00:29:24.000 Last one, Bubba and Hanks.
00:29:26.000 Bad news, our buddy Bubba is sick.
00:29:30.000 And, uh, it's not looking great for our friend, but, uh, we stand by him and people have survived much more dire consequences.
00:29:38.000 So let's not give up hope on our cancer laden friend, Bubba.
00:29:44.000 Bubba and Hank's though, uh, are still working, still up and running.
00:29:49.000 So let's support Bubba by buying Bubba and Hank's quality beef.
00:29:53.000 Matty, you, you had a whole shipment, right?
00:29:55.000 What'd you have there?
00:29:57.000 Pretty much.
00:29:57.000 I mean,
00:29:58.000 The Wagyu beef, the hamburgers?
00:30:01.000 Yeah, the burgers.
00:30:02.000 I mean, I've had just about every cut that they've sent.
00:30:06.000 And hands down, great.
00:30:09.000 Fantastic.
00:30:10.000 Unbelievable.
00:30:11.000 Now, how did you cook the Wagyu beef?
00:30:13.000 It's got a lot of marble in it, right?
00:30:14.000 It's got a lot of... I grilled it on a grill.
00:30:18.000 Did you add any flavoring?
00:30:20.000 Just salt and pepper.
00:30:22.000 Interesting.
00:30:22.000 Interesting.
00:30:23.000 Because the flavor is in the fat inside the meat.
00:30:27.000 That's where you get the...
00:30:30.000 So you don't want to hamper that by adding... Just a little salt and pepper.
00:30:34.000 You know, try to come up to room temp.
00:30:37.000 A little salt and pepper on both sides.
00:30:40.000 Go to BubbaAndHanks.com.
00:30:43.000 Use my promo code, Gavin.
00:30:44.000 That's a terrible picture, by the way.
00:30:47.000 That's a much better one.
00:30:48.000 Marrow butter.
00:30:49.000 Use my promo code, Gavin, and you'll get an extra 15% off.
00:30:52.000 Stick in there, Bub.
00:30:53.000 Stay strong.
00:30:54.000 Let's show our love and support.
00:30:55.000 A vet who supports us.
00:30:56.000 Have you noticed 100% of our sponsors are vets today?
00:31:00.000 What does that tell you?
00:31:02.000 I think it tells you that vets are the only ones that are not scared of being canceled.
00:31:08.000 Besides those who experienced black privilege, like, um, uh, Dave Chappelle, who's special as we discussed yesterday on Anthony's show. 1.00
00:31:18.000 Fucking stinks. 1.00
00:31:19.000 It's a black Nanette. 1.00
00:31:22.000 All he does is complain. 1.00
00:31:23.000 What a dork. 1.00
00:31:24.000 Fuck him. 1.00
00:31:25.000 There's a pun I could use, but I will not do that. 1.00
00:31:29.000 You still get your money's worth by just by saying it exists.
00:31:31.000 That's correct.
00:31:33.000 Uh, all right.
00:31:34.000 Shall we, shall we go behind the paywall?
00:31:36.000 We shall.
00:31:37.000 So we're going to continue reading letters for half an hour.
00:31:39.000 Then we're going to, uh, plug in, uh, it takes some calls.
00:31:45.000 The, the doodles are back.
00:31:47.000 Yeah.
00:31:48.000 Um, I'm not sure how to advertise that.
00:31:52.000 But we'll put it up on our site.
00:31:54.000 But I'll explain all this after the... Should we call it an intermission?
00:32:00.000 A denouement?
00:32:02.000 So we're about to go behind the paywall.
00:32:04.000 Are you trying to go piss?
00:32:05.000 Yeah, brother.
00:32:06.000 Just go through there and go straight.
00:32:07.000 Alright, I'm doing it.
00:32:11.000 Until we meet again, which is tomorrow.
00:32:13.000 For your cheapies, I guess it's next week.
00:32:15.000 Get fired, get in trouble, be brave, and never stop fighting.
00:32:31.000 Didn't you ride in anger when you saw the man in his big car?
00:32:34.000 Didn't you drive a banger and a gallon?
00:32:36.000 Didn't get your heart?
00:32:38.000 Should have been a famous star! 0.89
00:32:39.000 I want to be... a toad.
00:32:41.000 Maybe things were better then, before you made a promised life.
00:32:47.000 Rash commitments, heavy rights, and left-wing spiel.
00:32:52.000 Just do it, man. 0.63
00:32:53.000 I don't give a damn. 1.00
00:32:54.000 Fucking quits! 1.00