Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - GOML LIVE #137 - UNDERESTIMATING RYAN

00:00:06.000 Hello, this is Millie Collins.

00:00:11.000 This is Dr. David Dumping live from New York.

00:00:16.000 It's Get Off My One with Devin McGinnis.

00:01:06.000 I need some of your no potion.

00:01:09.000 Give me the chance all night.

00:01:13.000 That was clearly Beanie Man.

00:01:16.000 Was that Beanie Man? 1.00

00:01:17.000 Yeah, that was clearly Beanie Man with a slut that he's fucking who agreed to, or he agreed to do a song with her, I guess. 0.99

00:01:27.000 Because she's retarded and talentless, and he's one of the most famous dance hall dudes in history. 1.00

00:01:35.000 Who am I? 0.98

00:01:36.000 The keys to my bema. 1.00

00:01:38.000 But this dumb bitch, I don't know. 1.00

00:01:41.000 She got him to do a song. 1.00

00:01:43.000 What a mess. 0.98

00:01:44.000 That was sent him by a baby monster.

00:01:46.000 Speaking of baby monsters, we have Maddie Odell in the house. 1.00

00:01:50.000 What's going on, everybody?

00:01:50.000 Good to see you.

00:01:52.000 Welcome back, Maddie Odell.

00:01:54.000 We will be debuting Maddie's new show, Maddie's Shitty Kitchen. 0.98

00:01:58.000 There we go.

00:01:59.000 Which is smaller than this desk by far.

00:02:02.000 Oh, yeah.

00:02:04.000 And he'll be preparing this meal.

00:02:08.000 Right?

00:02:09.000 Yep.

00:02:10.000 That exact one.

00:02:13.000 Now, what is this exactly, Maddie?

00:02:15.000 That's a ribeye. 0.96

00:02:16.000 That's an inch and a quarter ribeye with asparagus, you know, sautéed and grilled.

00:02:24.000 It's got a little salt, pepper, and a knife and everything there.

00:02:27.000 That was done in a little bit of pan with olive oil, butter, and lemon juice, a little salt and pepper.

00:02:33.000 The steak is a ribeye from a local butcher.

00:02:38.000 Great choice.

00:02:39.000 That's my favorite steak.

00:02:40.000 It was a ribeye.

00:02:46.000 Are you mad?

00:02:48.000 Am I mad? 1.00

00:02:49.000 This is fucking disgusting. 1.00

00:02:52.000 This is a shit sandwich. 1.00

00:02:55.000 No, it's obviously delicious. 1.00

00:02:58.000 It was fucking terrible. 0.99

00:03:01.000 It was really good. 1.00

00:03:02.000 That's fucking terrible. 1.00

00:03:04.000 I wouldn't give it to my dog. 1.00

00:03:07.000 Might poison him.

00:03:08.000 Viewers are very sensitive about chewing on the mic, but I understand, Ryan, you were disturbed by how delicious it was.

00:03:16.000 Yeah.

00:03:16.000 When I took a bite, I was so disturbed and it went, he sent me a text that said it was the best meal he's had in months.

00:03:25.000 A long while.

00:03:26.000 For months.

00:03:27.000 Definitely this whole year.

00:03:29.000 Oh, yeah.

00:03:30.000 I put a little TLC in it because I like to eat good food.

00:03:35.000 Me like to eat good food with the mash.

00:03:37.000 There's butter there, too, if you want it. 1.00

00:03:38.000 The fucking potatoes? 0.99

00:03:40.000 There's butter for the potatoes. 1.00

00:03:41.000 Oh.

00:03:43.000 Yeah, when you were offering me butter on it and stuff, I was like, this is per I couldn't imagine it getting any better.

00:03:47.000 So no?

00:03:47.000 Oh, yeah.

00:03:48.000 And then you put butter on it as better.

00:03:50.000 But you can't picture it getting any better.

00:03:54.000 I thought my wife was the best cook in the world. 1.00

00:03:57.000 I'm now.

00:03:59.000 This is making me lust you.

00:04:01.000 All right.

00:04:04.000 Glad you like it.

00:04:05.000 Probably not the goal.

00:04:09.000 Don't judge Maddie.

00:04:10.000 Don't put your thoughts into Maddie's head.

00:04:12.000 You don't know what he was going for.

00:04:14.000 Well, I want to reveal the goal.

00:04:16.000 So if I say it's not the goal, anything.

00:04:17.000 Who does the cooking at your house, Ryan?

00:04:19.000 Mostly me, but sometimes my wife also cooks. 0.99

00:04:22.000 That's Malden finishing salt.

00:04:24.000 Oh, yeah.

00:04:26.000 Salt flakes.

00:04:27.000 The Malden.

00:04:28.000 Oh, yeah.

00:04:31.000 So, Ryan, do you think Maddie's a better cook than you?

00:04:35.000 Because you seem freaked out by this.

00:04:38.000 Yeah, he's got the touch, dude.

00:04:41.000 What can you say?

00:04:44.000 No, I was asking him about some tips and stuff like that, and I learned a lot while doing that.

00:04:49.000 I am also an owner of a cast iron skillet.

00:04:52.000 And so he was teaching me how to season it.

00:04:55.000 I come home, and I don't remember mentioning the seasoning of the pan, because his looks like it's brand new.

00:05:03.000 It's shiny and immaculate.

00:05:04.000 It gets used a lot.

00:05:06.000 Yeah, so you season it in the oven.

00:05:08.000 I season it quite often.

00:05:10.000 Yeah.

00:05:12.000 I go to the gym, I come home, and I hadn't mentioned the seasoning thing to my wife, and she's already starting to season the pan.

00:05:19.000 I was like, maybe I did mention it, and I didn't.

00:05:22.000 I definitely did.

00:05:23.000 You did.

00:05:23.000 You probably did.

00:05:24.000 I see asparagus.

00:05:26.000 Asparagoose.

00:05:27.000 You know, your wife has a new baby.

00:05:28.000 She feels vulnerable.

00:05:30.000 Anytime you say anything good, she's scared you're going to leave her.

00:05:34.000 What?

00:05:34.000 So if you say, like, hey, I saw NASCAR.

00:05:37.000 It looked cool.

00:05:39.000 You'd come home and she'd be wearing like a full body suit. 1.00

00:05:43.000 Fire retardant racing suit with a helmet. 0.99

00:05:45.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:05:48.000 Going, I love NASCAR too.

00:05:50.000 Don't go.

00:05:51.000 It's such a genetic thing.

00:05:52.000 Interesting.

00:05:53.000 Dude, this is amazing.

00:05:54.000 Where did you get these steaks from?

00:05:56.000 Local butcher.

00:05:58.000 And what's it called?

00:06:00.000 With that?

00:06:01.000 That's a ribeye. 0.96

00:06:04.000 My favorite steak.

00:06:05.000 Arguably the best steak.

00:06:06.000 A lot of people like porterhouses because they get like three cuts of meat, but...

00:06:11.000 It's got the perfect amount of fat, too.

00:06:13.000 Yeah.

00:06:14.000 It comes with more fat on it.

00:06:16.000 Like, if you see the pictures I sent you when I cooked the when they were raw, there's a lot more, but then it looked really marblized.

00:06:23.000 Yeah, you trimmed it.

00:06:24.000 Well, you trimmed the heavy, like the fat cap and everything like that.

00:06:27.000 You're not going to sit there and chew on the fat.

00:06:28.000 But the fat's the Flavor.

00:06:31.000 Yeah.

00:06:31.000 And there was a very tiny bit of a bone in one side of it, which is also flavor.

00:06:37.000 You want all that.

00:06:39.000 So, starting tomorrow, new hit show, Maddie's Shitty Kitchen. 1.00

00:06:43.000 The first show is this meal you're seeing right now: steak, potatoes, and asparagus.

00:06:48.000 The next show, I believe, the plan is prison food.

00:06:51.000 Yeah.

00:06:51.000 Well, you couldn't get more American than steak and potatoes.

00:06:54.000 Yeah, it's fucking amazing. 0.99

00:06:56.000 It's excellently well done. 0.99

00:06:58.000 If you look at the potatoes, they're fucking perfect. 0.98

00:07:01.000 The steak, perfectly well done. 0.99

00:07:04.000 It's Gordon Ramsey.

00:07:05.000 Yeah.

00:07:05.000 I don't know about that, dude.

00:07:08.000 It was one of the greatest.

00:07:09.000 Gordon Ramsey has this thing where he's always like this.

00:07:12.000 That's not cooked.

00:07:14.000 It's raw. 1.00

00:07:14.000 You're a fucking idiot. 1.00

00:07:15.000 So we're outside a restaurant in upstate New York where no one has made over a dime in four weeks. 1.00

00:07:23.000 So we're doing good guy, Gordon.

00:07:26.000 This is an excellent restaurant.

00:07:27.000 Lots of promise.

00:07:28.000 It's owned by a mother and a son.

00:07:30.000 They've done great numbers, but we're going to check out their menu to see if it holds up to Chef Ramsey's. 1.00

00:07:36.000 Fuck you. 1.00

00:07:36.000 No, have you watched, you clearly haven't watched the show. 1.00

00:07:38.000 I've watched the fights.

00:07:39.000 That's why I can only do Angry Ramsey.

00:07:41.000 Yeah, you've only seen the sizzle reels. 0.99

00:07:43.000 He goes to those restaurants in upstate New York, but he's a cocksucker to them if they suck. 1.00

00:07:49.000 Yeah. 0.99

00:07:49.000 It's not like he hugs everyone. 0.99

00:07:52.000 He only hugs them when they do a good job.

00:07:54.000 That hurts, though.

00:07:55.000 He starts out nice, and then he starts losing respect for them in real time.

00:07:58.000 Well, it's the same as all his shows.

00:08:02.000 He's a Scotsman, ultimately.

00:08:03.000 And he gives you the time of day. 0.99

00:08:05.000 He says, I'm open-minded, but when you fuck up, he says it, which is becoming a rare trait. 0.99

00:08:16.000 So you know how this goes. 0.99

00:08:18.000 The first half hour of the show is in front of Paywall.

00:08:22.000 It's all free.

00:08:23.000 It's meant to represent the brand, but it doesn't really because it's not how we do things here.

00:08:29.000 It's more of just sort of winging it.

00:08:34.000 We'll talk about the opening song in a second.

00:08:38.000 And then we take calls.

00:08:39.000 We take super chats.

00:08:41.000 We donate the super chats to Max and John, our friends in prison.

00:08:47.000 And we read letters. 0.97

00:08:49.000 Oh, shit, I forgot my computer in the other room. 0.99

00:08:52.000 And stuff like that. 0.98

00:08:52.000 We also, because this part is free, we thank our sponsors, tacticalwalls.com. 0.98

00:08:58.000 Veteran-owned, go to tacticalwalls.com for the best product in Americas.

00:09:04.000 The ad copy guy is so hurt by me constantly making fun of his copywriting that now it's just four sentences, which include say whatever you want.

00:09:16.000 And whatever is spelled wrong, by the way.

00:09:20.000 Ryan, you're showing Premiere.

00:09:23.000 It's what space everyone.

00:09:25.000 Whatever is one word.

00:09:28.000 Add copy guy.

00:09:29.000 And you don't have to type out www.

00:09:33.000 unless, of course, it's 1999 and you're a baby boomer.

00:09:38.000 Young people your age, you can just say tacticalwalls.com, promo code Gavin, 20% off all orders.

00:09:45.000 They are doing, he's included Christmas giveaways for some reason. 1.00

00:09:49.000 So even after you've been humiliated for your terrible copywriting, you have a typo and you mention Christmas, you fucking retard. 1.00

00:10:00.000 Yep, so incredible stuff there. 1.00

00:10:02.000 Ways to mount your guns.

00:10:04.000 If you live in a non-gun state like we do, you can put up your baseball equipment. 0.73

00:10:09.000 You can trick out your Jeep.

00:10:11.000 Go and check out TacticalWalls.com because to explain every single option they have goes on and on forever. 0.99

00:10:19.000 It is amazing the variety of shit they have. 0.97

00:10:23.000 And Tactical Tim is a close friend of the brand. 0.99

00:10:26.000 It's strange that almost all of our sponsors are veterans.

00:10:31.000 Isn't that weird?

00:10:32.000 Yeah.

00:10:32.000 Well, they're patriots.

00:10:35.000 I guess they're the only ones that don't care when Antifa calls you 900 times and terrorizes everyone you talk to.

00:10:42.000 So we got to get into Ukraine today, but let's go back a step to the opening song. 0.96

00:10:49.000 So that was a, I'm going to assume a slut? 1.00

00:10:54.000 Groupie. 1.00

00:10:55.000 A groupie, some probably like rich British woman.

00:11:00.000 She made, I'm going to say a million and a half from her divorce. 1.00

00:11:04.000 And she's in Jamaica getting fucked. 1.00

00:11:06.000 She's fucking beanie man. 1.00

00:11:08.000 And she goes, I want to be a performer too. 1.00

00:11:09.000 Look at her.

00:11:10.000 She's up in age, too.

00:11:11.000 Yeah.

00:11:12.000 She's no spring chicken. 1.00

00:11:15.000 Yeah, he can't be surge woman, never find me. 0.99

00:11:27.000 She can't be wrong, right?

00:11:28.000 She's a nobody who wants a music career. 0.97

00:11:30.000 She's Rebecca Blacked. 0.93

00:11:32.000 There's no way.

00:11:33.000 Oh, I know. 0.99

00:11:34.000 Maybe she didn't even fuck Beanie Man. 1.00

00:11:36.000 Maybe her husband paid for this, and then she did a song with Beanie Man. 0.99

00:11:41.000 She's actually never fucked him. 0.99

00:11:43.000 To make a wish. 0.96

00:11:46.000 Possible.

00:11:47.000 Maybe she's terminal.

00:11:48.000 She looks like my mom. 0.97

00:12:00.000 I've never been less horny in my life. 0.96

00:12:06.000 Yeah, this is about as sexy as an actual hospital song.

00:12:09.000 It reminded me of Beanie Man in 1998 when he did a song with, I think it was.

00:12:21.000 Wait, go to 1-2?

00:12:25.000 Oh, yeah.

00:12:26.000 So this is Beanie Man at his best.

00:12:28.000 For some reason, punk rockers were allowed to listen to reggae and dance-all when I was a teenager, so I'm very well-versed in it against my will.

00:12:38.000 This is Beanie Man's hit. 0.83

00:12:39.000 This is a guy we just saw without a hideous spinster forcing him to perform.

00:12:58.000 That was 98.

00:13:00.000 I think this song is why I have a BMW.

00:13:02.000 I love Jamaican Nouveau Riche where they have cinder blocks.

00:13:07.000 And I said, Sim Simma, who's got the keys bump beamer? 0.90

00:13:10.000 You were like, I think Peggy was a beatie man guy.

00:13:14.000 Same with my Land Rover.

00:13:15.000 It's Jamaicans.

00:13:16.000 I love that they have a Bemmer and a Land Rover next to a house made of cinder blocks and corrugated tin.

00:13:23.000 And I was going to say, you got the Beamer and the Land Rover and a Land Lord.

00:13:28.000 Yeah.

00:13:30.000 But the song, the opening song reminded me of Tippa Iri.

00:13:35.000 Few people remember him.

00:13:36.000 He was like a British dude, but he sounded like a Jamaican guy that no one had ever heard of.

00:13:41.000 And when you found his records, you thought you dug them up from some old weird Jamaican. 0.99

00:13:45.000 Like even the cover there does not look like you found some weird rural Jamaican guy. 0.99

00:13:50.000 He's from fucking Brixton. 0.99

00:14:03.000 Maybe this is what that white woman was going for. 1.00

00:14:06.000 Possibly.

00:14:07.000 She didn't hit it, though.

00:14:08.000 Yeah, no.

00:14:09.000 I think she missed the mark. 1.00

00:14:13.000 She just definitely wants a shot of penis cylinder. 1.00

00:14:19.000 I like in this song, she talks about how she's big and he goes, me, tip Irian, me, kind of small or something. 1.00

00:14:25.000 And she goes, me, Mrs. Irian, me, big and me, Brad.

00:14:31.000 The big and proud thing lived on way back when.

00:14:35.000 Well, Ryan, you talk like my youth was in the 1920s.

00:14:40.000 I picture black and white when you tell your story.

00:14:42.000 This is like 1989.

00:14:46.000 Year of my birth.

00:14:48.000 Really?

00:14:48.000 Yep.

00:14:48.000 Check out this beautiful jam, Raga Muffin Girl.

00:14:52.000 A beautiful ode to his lovely wife.

00:14:55.000 She's a ragamuffin with the chicken stuffing. 1.00

00:15:00.000 Whoa.

00:15:02.000 You're going to fall in love with this.

00:15:06.000 Raga Muffin. 0.67

00:15:07.000 Raga Muffin. 0.67

00:15:08.000 Ragamu Wuffin.

00:15:16.000 I think you just said step up, Mr. Honeybites, and tell him Waguan. 1.00

00:15:20.000 Come on, bye.

00:15:21.000 McGuan Wan. 0.96

00:15:22.000 You're known as Mr. Honeybites?

00:15:29.000 Trying to think, who's better, this guy or the guy with the one-string guitar?

00:15:34.000 No, dude.

00:15:34.000 What are you talking about?

00:15:36.000 How dare you? 1.00

00:15:37.000 The guy with the one-string guitar is an incompetent retard. 1.00

00:15:39.000 Tipa Iri is a god. 1.00

00:15:41.000 Oh, yeah?

00:15:42.000 Tipa Iri.

00:15:43.000 He did a song with the Black Eyed Peas recently, 1-6.

00:15:46.000 Really?

00:15:46.000 Uh-huh.

00:15:49.000 Which is weird because they didn't take advantage of his dance hall skills.

00:15:54.000 They just treated him like a reggae star.

00:15:56.000 I was watching this video before the show, and it looks like, you know those cooking shows like Gordon Ramsey, where they say, here's a vending machine, make a delicious gourmet snack with Cheetos and Oreos,

00:16:11.000 like whatever you get in the vending machine.

00:16:13.000 They have to make a high-end meal.

00:16:15.000 Doesn't this look like they were locked in Target overnight and they had to make a hit song with the equipment you can find in Target and the clothes?

00:16:28.000 That's him.

00:16:29.000 That's Tip Irie.

00:16:31.000 Yeah, he's older than us.

00:16:32.000 He's like 60.

00:16:33.000 Wow.

00:16:41.000 How Target is this?

00:16:45.000 I think they did a Target commercial, didn't it?

00:16:49.000 Well, if I was a CEO of Target, I'd go, these guys are making Target commercials.

00:16:55.000 Let's get a Target logo on them.

00:16:59.000 They're dancers.

00:17:00.000 This is dancer rock.

00:17:04.000 Go Fergie.

00:17:05.000 What happened?

00:17:11.000 They really did.

00:17:12.000 Oh, my God.

00:17:14.000 Oh, my God.

00:17:15.000 They did a Target commercial.

00:17:17.000 And it's exactly the same, but actually better.

00:17:27.000 Is this a song they already had, or they did this for Target?

00:17:30.000 No, this is their song.

00:17:31.000 Oh, yeah.

00:17:32.000 They released it.

00:17:32.000 Oh, they're releasing their app.

00:17:34.000 They're doing an app for their CD, and it's at Target for $9.98.

00:17:38.000 Only at Target.

00:17:39.000 Here's another one.

00:17:40.000 Another Black IP Target promotion?

00:17:42.000 Another one.

00:17:45.000 Wow, they love Target, dude.

00:17:52.000 What's the difference between the Black Eyed Peas and Target?

00:17:56.000 You could enter one and buy stuff in the other.

00:17:57.000 It's the same thing.

00:18:00.000 They should just merge.

00:18:02.000 I've always said that about the Canadian-American border.

00:18:04.000 Let's just erase it and merge. 1.00

00:18:06.000 Let's cut the shit. 1.00

00:18:07.000 We're the same. 1.00

00:18:09.000 Black-eyed peas are Target.

00:18:12.000 Stop.

00:18:13.000 They'll do all the music for all your commercials.

00:18:17.000 They are brand ambassadors.

00:18:19.000 So then I'm reminded of dance bands, like bands made by dancers, which of course brings you to the Pussycat dolls, who had zero musical talent, but they were sexy and dancers. 0.67

00:18:36.000 And they hired Snoop, just like that opening woman hired Beanie Man. 1.00

00:18:41.000 And the other guys hired Tippa Ire.

00:18:46.000 They're just a little bit hotter than the nurse.

00:18:49.000 If you held a gun to my head, I don't think I could get this song stuck in that same head.

00:18:57.000 I don't know this song.

00:18:59.000 But it has like 63 million views. 0.99

00:19:02.000 Holy shit. 0.99

00:19:03.000 That main chick is the only one you remember. 0.99

00:19:05.000 Like, if you saw any of the other ones in an airport or something, you wouldn't.

00:19:09.000 You wouldn't be like, that's the chick from that thing. 1.00

00:19:12.000 Just unknown.

00:19:13.000 It's like a K-pop band.

00:19:15.000 It's like the bassist of the Who, John Entwistle.

00:19:24.000 You could sit next to him at a bar and have no idea you're sitting with John Entwistle.

00:19:30.000 She's got kind of an ethnic vibe, like a Pilipina. 0.99

00:19:33.000 She's something. 1.00

00:19:34.000 Anyway, that song sucks. 0.98

00:19:35.000 But then I'm reminded of her brother, Jonathan Anton, who had an incredible show in 2004 called Blowout. 0.98

00:19:44.000 And he's a hairstylist who's very aggressive.

00:19:48.000 This is her brother.

00:19:51.000 Get him in.

00:19:53.000 Stop.

00:19:54.000 Remember how I told you the way to fuck your wife is to watch her stupid shows and comment on them? 1.00

00:20:00.000 It's the best way to seduce a girlfriend or a wife is to pretend you care about real housewives or whatever. 1.00

00:20:05.000 But inevitably, you get Stockholm syndrome and you start caring about the show.

00:20:10.000 I started getting into this show Blowout in 2004 that was on Bravo.

00:20:17.000 And it's about this weird, not gay hairstylist who's probably has the Aiku of like, I would say, a bear or a frog. 0.99

00:20:28.000 And he's got a very bad temper.

00:20:31.000 And he was always coming up with ideas.

00:20:33.000 Because the guy's making tons of money because you're a hairstylist in LA, which is, it's like being in sanitation in New York.

00:20:39.000 Like, you can't not make money.

00:20:41.000 But in one episode, his water dies, his water's out at his house.

00:20:46.000 So he uses bottled water to wash his hair.

00:20:49.000 And he goes, oh my God, my hair is insane today.

00:20:54.000 So he becomes convinced that it's because of the bottled water.

00:20:58.000 So he comes up with these filters to put on your shower head that can make your water like bottled water, which is just made up filters.

00:21:06.000 It's just another bunch of filters.

00:21:08.000 It means nothing. 0.98

00:21:09.000 Carbon is in there and all this crap. 0.98

00:21:11.000 It means nothing. 0.99

00:21:12.000 But women are so eager to be attractive that they spend thousands of dollars on this. 1.00

00:21:18.000 So it's a success.

00:21:19.000 So that guy, I remember this episode.

00:21:22.000 That guy was going to design the packaging, but he was taking too long and he was pissing off Pussycat Doll's brother. 1.00

00:21:30.000 And he'd had enough of this shit. 0.99

00:21:34.000 So this is him arguing with Pee Wee Herman about it. 1.00

00:21:37.000 Get and get the f ⁇ out of my song. 1.00

00:21:38.000 I'm going to leave the bottles there.

00:21:39.000 You look at it.

00:21:40.000 I'll go.

00:21:41.000 Fake. 1.00

00:21:43.000 Get him out of the motherfucker. 1.00

00:21:46.000 Just doesn't matter. 1.00

00:21:47.000 You discuss it with him.

00:21:48.000 Look at that LA look. 0.98

00:21:51.000 Whoa.

00:21:54.000 You know, when you called me, you said what we were doing. 1.00

00:21:56.000 Shut the fuck up and leave. 1.00

00:21:59.000 Dude, I was going to work with you and I was going to be enslaved. 1.00

00:22:02.000 Am I...

00:22:02.000 In 2004, were TVs square?

00:22:05.000 Yeah.

00:22:06.000 Even all of those black-eyed Ped songs. 0.58

00:22:10.000 Wow.

00:22:11.000 I'm old.

00:22:12.000 Yeah, aspect ratio.

00:22:13.000 TVs were square in 2004.

00:22:15.000 Yep.

00:22:16.000 That's very recent.

00:22:21.000 Should we.

00:22:22.000 Okay, we're done discussing those things.

00:22:24.000 Start the show?

00:22:25.000 Let's start the show.

00:22:37.000 Why was that so green that one show?

00:22:41.000 It was the keying. 0.94

00:22:42.000 I had to adjust the keying.

00:22:45.000 Why'd you have to adjust it that one particular episode?

00:22:48.000 I used it for different things, and usually I don't have the green screen on it.

00:22:53.000 And also, I've been creating new sessions, so I have to redo the green screen parameters every time I do that.

00:22:59.000 Ryan and I are going to AFPAC tomorrow to study the white nationalists and learn about their disgusting behavior and expose them for who they are, which is number one threat to American safety today, domestic terrorism,

00:23:16.000 mostly white supremacists, which is Trump supporters, blue-collar Americans, anti-mandators, anti-vaxxers, QAnon, Canadian truckers. 0.91

00:23:30.000 Am I missing anything here?

00:23:32.000 Parents that go to school board meetings.

00:23:34.000 Parents that care about CRT.

00:23:37.000 Parents that, I know this sounds like anti-max, but parents that don't want their kids to wear masks.

00:23:43.000 Those eight groups are the threat to America.

00:23:48.000 They are going to destroy our country.

00:23:50.000 And Biden is doing his best to stop them, but, and Trudeau is chipping in.

00:23:55.000 Klaus Schwab is doing a great job.

00:23:57.000 But eventually, you know, you got to take up arms yourself. 0.99

00:24:02.000 So we're going to AFPAC to kill everyone there. 1.00

00:24:05.000 Right. 0.94

00:24:06.000 First, I'm going to ask them, I mean, there's a lot of controversy over how does, like, I know the followers of Nick Fuentes, they Zeke Heil with like the 45-degree angle one.

00:24:15.000 But since he's the leader, does he just do that like Hitler Heil? 0.93

00:24:18.000 Heil? 0.81

00:24:19.000 Like that little lazy?

00:24:20.000 Like Dr. Evil?

00:24:21.000 Yeah, Heil.

00:24:23.000 I want to get to the bottom of that.

00:24:25.000 We got to stop them. 1.00

00:24:27.000 And we got to find these black white nationalists because they must hate themselves. 0.99

00:24:32.000 Bryson Gray, John Miller. 0.98

00:24:36.000 And those are just the people that are special guests.

00:24:38.000 There's also the black attendees. 0.93

00:24:40.000 Remember last year we noticed a bunch of black attendees? 0.97

00:24:48.000 Got to find them too. 0.96

00:24:49.000 I got to say, every time I fart, I get mad.

00:24:52.000 Why is that?

00:24:53.000 Because it smells like cobalt. 0.98

00:25:00.000 And I'm like, I fly to fucking Nashville to do that interview, right? 0.96

00:25:06.000 I'm taking off my shoes. 1.00

00:25:07.000 I'm taking off all my shit. 1.00

00:25:09.000 Some Muslim is giving me shit about my belt. 1.00

00:25:11.000 I'm taking off my belt, going back outside. 1.00

00:25:15.000 So that's Muslims fucking up my day to day. 1.00

00:25:18.000 Then I fart, and there's no shit smell. 1.00

00:25:21.000 It's cobalt because either my nose is broken or my ass is broken. 1.00

00:25:25.000 Something's wrong with my body because of COVID. 1.00

00:25:28.000 So that's China. 0.72

00:25:29.000 That's the communists.

00:25:31.000 So China is affecting my day to day. 0.54

00:25:34.000 Muslims affected my day to day. 1.00

00:25:37.000 Radical leftists affect my day to day. 0.98

00:25:39.000 They put signs on my neighbor's lawn.

00:25:40.000 They terrorize my children and stuff. 0.99

00:25:42.000 So all these groups are fucking up me personally. 0.98

00:25:46.000 And it's the same for most Americans. 0.94

00:25:47.000 You talk to the average Joe and you're like, how was your day today? 0.99

00:25:52.000 Well, COVID fucked me over. 0.99

00:25:53.000 I got doxxed at work. 1.00

00:25:55.000 The mandate's fucking me over. 0.98

00:25:56.000 So we have these enemies that affect us on a day-to-day basis. 0.99

00:26:01.000 On a Thursday, whatever we are today, 2, 24, 22.

00:26:07.000 Yep. 0.99

00:26:08.000 These people are fucking up our day today. 0.97

00:26:11.000 Yet, what does the news consume with? 0.99

00:26:14.000 Nick Fuentes. 0.99

00:26:16.000 Yeah, he's fucking up my life. 0.99

00:26:19.000 Some skinny dude with long fingers who has controversial opinions about nationalism is wrecking the world. 0.99

00:26:27.000 Let's make it unable for him to fly. 0.99

00:26:29.000 Muslims can fly, even though 100% of air terrorism is Muslim. 0.86

00:26:37.000 But we don't want to stereotype a group, but Nick Fuentes can't fly.

00:26:40.000 He's still on a no-fly list?

00:26:42.000 Yeah, dude.

00:26:44.000 So we have to save Bryson Gray, save John Miller, save, like in his lyrics.

00:26:48.000 He's got SOS in here.

00:26:50.000 Spotify to Ban My Songs.

00:26:54.000 So S. I never thought.

00:26:56.000 I thought of that.

00:26:56.000 Bryson Gray is.

00:26:59.000 He's been held captive.

00:27:01.000 Yep. 1.00

00:27:02.000 Because dumbass fucking leftist journalists interview black people who go to white nationalist conferences. 1.00

00:27:09.000 If they really cared about getting to the truth, they would investigate that. 1.00

00:27:14.000 But you know why they don't?

00:27:15.000 Because they know what the truth is. 1.00

00:27:17.000 And the truth is that their crusade is completely full of shit. 1.00

00:27:21.000 Anyway, before we start taking calls, we should discuss Ukraine and get rid of the freeloaders. 1.00

00:27:29.000 No, no, no.

00:27:30.000 I want to get some Ukraine into the free show.

00:27:33.000 But I thought, who better to ask about Ukraine than our number one source of information for all things foreign policy, ladies and gentlemen, Ryan Ketsu Review.

00:28:05.000 Rygai, what should we do?

00:28:07.000 Sanctions.

00:28:08.000 What do you think?

00:28:09.000 Well, interesting.

00:28:10.000 I mean, the sanctions, they've affected the inflation.

00:28:13.000 They've turned the Russian dollar into kaputk.

00:28:17.000 Wait, we've already done the sanctions?

00:28:19.000 We've already imposed sanctions on Russia?

00:28:20.000 Well, I think the imminence of the sanctions already has affected the dollar.

00:28:24.000 Oh, simply through the sanctions.

00:28:27.000 Yes.

00:28:27.000 So now, if we take them off of this, I think it's called SWISH, SWIFT, the Swift pay, then that could have bad consequences.

00:28:36.000 I think that might already have been, Putin might have already expected that would happen.

00:28:44.000 But yeah, that could be seen as a, because he made it pretty vague, anybody who tries to interfere with his Ukraine operation, that will be like an act of war, essentially, and we'll have to pay for it in ways that we've never seen before.

00:29:01.000 Okay, so you're...

00:29:03.000 Ryan's solution, not sending our boys over there, but banking sanctions.

00:29:10.000 Well, sending our boys over there.

00:29:12.000 I don't know if that's personally.

00:29:14.000 I don't think it's a good idea.

00:29:15.000 Okay.

00:29:16.000 But it's the sanctions.

00:29:18.000 The sanctions is the way to go.

00:29:21.000 Yeah, I mean, it'll stop this. 1.00

00:29:23.000 If we kick the Russians out of the World Bank, get the fuck out. 1.00

00:29:28.000 You're not part of the global economy anymore. 1.00

00:29:31.000 That could have repercussions.

00:29:32.000 Now he has nothing to lose.

00:29:33.000 Now, if he acquires some of the resources from Ukraine, he's not going to be able to liquefy the world. 0.99

00:29:40.000 What about the part where Germany, some childless communist cunt named Angela Merkel, killed all of their ability to make their own energy? 0.97

00:29:53.000 She's against nuclear energy, of course, unlike France. 0.98

00:29:55.000 She doesn't buy from us. 0.53

00:29:57.000 So she was left with wind and solar, which means you don't have any power.

00:30:01.000 So she got it all from Russia.

00:30:03.000 So when we talk about global sanctions, Merkel goes, no.

00:30:07.000 Yeah, we're hurting.

00:30:09.000 There's a lot of people who are going to be able to do it. 0.99

00:30:09.000 Because if you fuck with Russia, you fuck with Germany because we're totally 50% of Germany's energy comes from Russia. 0.99

00:30:17.000 So any kind of major sanctions that hurt Russia hurt her. 1.00

00:30:21.000 It hurts us too.

00:30:22.000 We get 100,000 barrels around a day from Russia.

00:30:26.000 So they would stop exporting it because they would stop being able to, if they're off the Swift pay and stuff, then they would not be able to get their money the profits from those transactions.

00:30:37.000 So they would stop, and then we'd be hurting for the oil, maybe open up the Keystone pipeline.

00:30:41.000 But SACI said that it wasn't open.

00:30:43.000 So there's nothing flowing through it.

00:30:44.000 So that really wouldn't help.

00:30:46.000 But we could start fracking again and start things.

00:30:48.000 But for a long time, it looks like we're going to be hurting in the old oil price aruse.

00:30:52.000 Now, they have imposed the sanctions.

00:30:54.000 They've canceled five banks, I think, or they stopped five banks from letting the oligarchs in Russia, the people around Putin, like some of the rich elites, from accessing anything from their accounts.

00:31:06.000 So it's hurting people in his country.

00:31:09.000 And he's a very idealistic guy, right?

00:31:13.000 Ideological guy.

00:31:14.000 So his people, if they're upset, and they are, they've arrested, I think, 1,700 protests.

00:31:20.000 So if he's seeing that much resistance against this land grab, then that might be the thing to make him change course.

00:31:32.000 But he feels a right to Ukraine.

00:31:34.000 I mean, he feels that NATO, Ukraine being a part of NATO, that's an existential threat.

00:31:39.000 Similar to how the Bay of Pigs, you know, Cuba having missiles was an existential threat to us.

00:31:47.000 So he kind of has a point.

00:31:49.000 I'm not sure why I lie on this whole thing.

00:31:51.000 I'm learning a lot of this today, but I'm very interested in what's going on over there. 1.00

00:31:54.000 Well, we started the spit to make fun of how stupid you are. 1.00

00:31:57.000 Yeah, yeah. 1.00

00:31:57.000 But I think what happened was we attacked the Puerto Rican half, and the Japanese half retaliated. 1.00

00:32:02.000 I'll take over.

00:32:03.000 Like Pearl Harbor.

00:32:04.000 Right.

00:32:04.000 And I think you're right.

00:32:06.000 I think the solution is that we open up our fuel lines.

00:32:10.000 We open up our ability to generate fuel.

00:32:14.000 And then not everyone is so beholden to Putin.

00:32:18.000 Frack. 0.99

00:32:20.000 Fucking open up Keystone. 1.00

00:32:22.000 Make our own fuel. 0.99

00:32:23.000 Taiwan is the real thing that's going on.

00:32:27.000 The XL.

00:32:27.000 The one you shut down first day in office.

00:32:30.000 What?

00:32:31.000 The XL pipeline.

00:32:32.000 The Excel pipeline.

00:32:33.000 Yeah. 0.96

00:32:34.000 It's retarded. 1.00

00:32:35.000 Ultimately, I don't like America looking weak, but I don't care about Taiwan or Ukraine. 0.95

00:32:40.000 You can have them.

00:32:43.000 Sorry, you live next to MS-13. 1.00

00:32:46.000 Your house is going to get fucked with. 1.00

00:32:47.000 It's not my job to protect you. 0.99

00:32:49.000 I apologize.

00:32:50.000 Bye-bye. 0.99

00:32:51.000 I don't give a shit. 0.99

00:32:52.000 You can show all the pictures of dying old ladies on Daily Mail, UK, Yuan. 0.99

00:32:58.000 You can show me pictures of children crying out in pain. 1.00

00:33:00.000 I don't give a fuck. 1.00

00:33:02.000 Sorry, die, bitches. 1.00

00:33:03.000 I happen to. 0.99

00:33:05.000 I think, even though they're just white people, I think the fact that just civilians are being hurt is probably a pretty big deal, but we can't be the world police for, you know. 0.55

00:33:13.000 I don't care about anything outside the Western world.

00:33:15.000 And even then, I start with America and do concentric circles outwards.

00:33:20.000 The whole argument was that Ukraine was kind of leaning towards Western values, and that's what got Putin to be like, what the F?

00:33:26.000 Because he has like puppet regimes in there and stuff.

00:33:29.000 He probably wants to create another puppet regime.

00:33:31.000 But, you know, Zelensky is not innocent in this whole thing. 0.99

00:33:33.000 He's been, all the shady shit and the corruption happens over there with Burisma, and then there was some other bullshit over there. 0.98

00:33:41.000 So there is corruption, and I think they're like really backed by Israel. 0.99

00:33:46.000 Okay, boring, let's take some calls.

00:33:47.000 All right.

00:33:48.000 Do we say bye to everybody?

00:33:50.000 Bye.

00:33:51.000 No, let's take maybe a couple calls and then we'll say bye to everybody.

00:33:54.000 Let's open up the super chat.

00:33:56.000 You do the thanks for calling intro, and I'll go get my McCutter.

00:34:00.000 That's what my kids called it when they were young.

00:34:02.000 On the air. 1.00

00:34:05.000 This is a fucking loser. 1.00

00:34:07.000 You know, I'm here to learn, share, listen, understand why. 1.00

00:34:10.000 Hey, why does everyone get two things?

00:34:12.000 You got one thing.

00:34:13.000 Thank you for calling.

00:34:14.000 It's great hearing from you.

00:34:16.000 Bye-bye.

00:34:16.000 All right, next call.

00:34:19.000 Bye-bye.

00:34:22.000 So true.

00:34:22.000 I mean, we do say bye, don't we?

00:34:24.000 I guess I gotta turn on this road mic.

00:34:28.000 We say goodbye in plenty of ways.

00:34:30.000 We say.

00:34:31.000 Goodbye.

00:34:32.000 Bye-bye.

00:34:33.000 Is Trump going to run in 2024?

00:34:36.000 I hope so.

00:34:38.000 Bye-bye.

00:34:39.000 Bye, everybody.

00:34:42.000 Bye.

00:34:43.000 Thank you.

00:34:43.000 Just for the comedy, I missed the laugh.

00:34:45.000 You know what I miss?

00:34:47.000 I just posted this on my story today.

00:34:50.000 Look at this.

00:34:51.000 Look at this.

00:34:52.000 Biden.

00:34:55.000 That's me ripped.

00:34:57.000 Look at this.

00:34:58.000 How beautiful.

00:35:01.000 He's got a long time.

00:35:03.000 Long time.

00:35:05.000 He's got Mariana Romero.

00:35:10.000 Amazing, right?

00:35:10.000 Amazing.

00:35:12.000 Maybe.

00:35:12.000 It's amazing.

00:35:14.000 Look how nice and simple that was, though.

00:35:16.000 Just the good old days.

00:35:17.000 Remember Fauci's throat?

00:35:18.000 Yeah.

00:35:19.000 Yeah.

00:35:20.000 Trump had a beautiful thing. 0.99

00:35:21.000 Trump fucking barreled it in. 0.99

00:35:23.000 Dude. 0.99

00:35:24.000 I saw some meme where they, I think Donald Trump Jr. put it out where he goes, I miss the way he said China.

00:35:32.000 China.

00:35:35.000 Okay, so you need to turn your mic on.

00:35:36.000 You got your mic on there, Gav?

00:35:37.000 My mic's on.

00:35:38.000 All right, we have a call about marriage.

00:35:40.000 A good topic here.

00:35:42.000 Hey, Gavin, Uhuru.

00:35:44.000 Uhuru.

00:35:46.000 Hey, so I've been dating this girl for a while.

00:35:48.000 Things are getting kind of serious.

00:35:50.000 I bought a ring, getting ready to propose to her.

00:35:53.000 Just want to know what you think the best way or the most classy way is to propose to a woman. 0.85

00:35:58.000 How long have you been dating?

00:36:00.000 Over a year.

00:36:02.000 All right.

00:36:03.000 How old are you?

00:36:04.000 I'm 25.

00:36:05.000 She's 29. 1.00

00:36:07.000 Dump her ass. 1.00

00:36:07.000 She's old as shit. 1.00

00:36:08.000 Just starting anew. 1.00

00:36:11.000 Well, why do you say it like that? 1.00

00:36:13.000 She's disgusting. 1.00

00:36:15.000 I would ghost her, go away on vacation, don't answer her calls. 0.99

00:36:19.000 No, my advice with proposing is try to bring in a thing that you guys have in common.

00:36:27.000 Like my wife was obsessed with Paris.

00:36:30.000 So we went to the Eiffel Tower.

00:36:34.000 I hired a little street urchin to hand her a crumpled-up plastic bag, a paper bag. 0.99

00:36:41.000 She opens it up.

00:36:42.000 The ring is in there.

00:36:43.000 Will you marry me?

00:36:44.000 Oh, my God. 1.00

00:36:45.000 Fucking wet as a pack of slits. 0.99

00:36:49.000 And homeboy got it that night. 1.00

00:36:52.000 There you go.

00:36:54.000 But like, I don't know, like, say you guys have a place you like to visit.

00:36:59.000 You hide the ring in one of the rocks or something, and then you pull it out.

00:37:03.000 And will you marry me?

00:37:04.000 I told one dude, I said, you're going to Ireland.

00:37:08.000 Her grandparents are there.

00:37:09.000 Go to her grandparents' grave, cemetery.

00:37:14.000 And then when you're there, say, isn't it weird how your grandparents met and then they made your mom and then your mom met a guy and then she made you.

00:37:21.000 And here we are, you know, perpetuating this thing.

00:37:25.000 And we're alive because of these people, chance meanings, making these commitments.

00:37:29.000 And then he pulled out the ring and he got down on one knee and he said, will you marry me now?

00:37:35.000 And she said, no.

00:37:39.000 She said, I'm too young.

00:37:43.000 And then they continued their trip, but they slept in different beds.

00:37:47.000 Very awkward.

00:37:49.000 And she cried herself to sleep every night.

00:37:52.000 She did or he did?

00:37:54.000 He did.

00:37:55.000 I go, why didn't you just leave?

00:37:56.000 And he's like, we spent a bunch of money on the trip.

00:37:58.000 I don't know.

00:38:00.000 So I'm not an expert, but you can feel it out.

00:38:05.000 You've got to ask her dad for permission and make sure he can keep his mouth shut.

00:38:10.000 But I would choose something that's special to you because you're going to be talking about this for the rest of your lives.

00:38:18.000 So try to make it something cool. 0.90

00:38:21.000 You know, Albert Hammond Jr. proposed to a girl when he was shit-faced and it fell out of his hand and into a dog bowl and he took him about five minutes to find it. 0.94

00:38:33.000 DJ Tiga, friend of mine, finally got the courage when he was drunk in the middle of the night. 0.96

00:38:39.000 He has threadbare underwear on and he pulled it out of a FedEx package and gave it to her.

00:38:45.000 So you can blow this, but I don't know.

00:38:50.000 Be creative.

00:38:50.000 Do something that involves your relationship.

00:38:54.000 And then fuck her. 1.00

00:38:55.000 Cool, man. 1.00

00:38:56.000 Bye. 1.00

00:38:57.000 All right, like motherfuckers. 1.00

00:38:58.000 Guys, get laid. 1.00

00:39:00.000 The best thing about proposing, you get pussy that night. 1.00

00:39:04.000 Yeah. 1.00

00:39:09.000 You would hope so.

00:39:11.000 I never trust these no videos.

00:39:17.000 Did she say no or yes?

00:39:19.000 Couldn't tell.

00:39:20.000 These are supposed to be good ones.

00:39:21.000 Well, these will make your heart burst.

00:39:23.000 That one was kind of like, okay.

00:39:26.000 These are just regular proposals.

00:39:28.000 Fall.

00:39:29.000 Yeah, I was going to say, imagine she falls over the fucking strength. 1.00

00:39:32.000 Don't marry her. 1.00

00:39:32.000 She's fat. 1.00

00:39:35.000 What are you doing?

00:39:36.000 Her legs show promise.

00:39:37.000 She doesn't deserve to be loved. 0.86

00:39:41.000 That's right.

00:39:45.000 She's blindfolded. 1.00

00:39:46.000 Oh, she's going to push it out of her ass? 1.00

00:39:48.000 I think so, yeah. 1.00

00:39:49.000 It'll shoot out of her ass onto a finger. 1.00

00:39:52.000 Who's going to pull her ring out of her ass? 1.00

00:39:55.000 I don't know if other people should be there. 1.00

00:39:57.000 Yeah, no, no, no.

00:39:58.000 It's a very personal, private thing.

00:40:00.000 Yeah.

00:40:01.000 Even filming it is suspect.

00:40:03.000 And she may feel pressured.

00:40:04.000 Yeah, trivializes, doesn't it?

00:40:08.000 We have another one about... 1.00

00:40:09.000 Let's do one more call and then we'll read one letter and then we'll fucking tell these fuckers. 1.00

00:40:12.000 Phone tag? 1.00

00:40:13.000 Hey, Mark, you on the line, dog? 0.97

00:40:15.000 With your noisy-ass submarine phone? 0.97

00:40:21.000 Go ahead, Mark. 0.98

00:40:22.000 Yo, dog.

00:40:23.000 What's up, dude? 0.99

00:40:26.000 Yo, so earlier today, I was happier than a pig and shit when I saw your episode of Tinfoil Hat with Sam Tripoli. 0.97

00:40:37.000 Yeah, he's a great guy. 0.98

00:40:39.000 Yeah, it was, yeah, I really liked it.

00:40:43.000 Yeah, I got really excited when you started talking really conspiracy theory-ish towards the end there.

00:40:51.000 Getting really excited.

00:40:53.000 You sound horny. 0.83

00:40:55.000 You are horny. 1.00

00:40:56.000 Are you beating off right now, sir? 0.86

00:41:00.000 No, but anyway, yeah, I wanted to real quick talk about Ukraine because I saw that right before, like about an hour ago, they started to announce the gas prices are going to go up.

00:41:13.000 You know, it's like, it's so convenient. 0.80

00:41:14.000 What the fuck does that have to do with Ukraine being invaded and stuff? 1.00

00:41:19.000 It's just, it's ridiculous. 0.99

00:41:21.000 Yeah, because the gas prices have been great for the past year.

00:41:26.000 They've been rock bottom.

00:41:28.000 It's not like I turn white as a ghost while I watch those numbers go.

00:41:33.000 They just keep going even higher.

00:41:35.000 It's just like, you know, it's so convenient that they just, oh, hey, let's Ukraine's being invaded. 0.95

00:41:40.000 Yeah, let's.

00:41:40.000 It has to do with the oil supply.

00:41:42.000 Let's crank that up a little bit. 1.00

00:41:44.000 It's all bullshit. 0.99

00:41:45.000 Yeah, and I don't understand why all these people are like, yeah, I get it. 0.99

00:41:48.000 They don't want to have war, but all these people on Facebook are putting these Ukrainian flags over their profiles and stuff. 0.98

00:41:56.000 It's like, dude, you don't give a fuck. 1.00

00:41:58.000 I don't give a fuck. 1.00

00:41:59.000 Kill them all. 1.00

00:42:00.000 Kill them all. 1.00

00:42:00.000 Let God sort them out. 1.00

00:42:01.000 Here it's censored.

00:42:02.000 We support Russia, like Josh LaCash. 0.99

00:42:04.000 I don't care about Russia either. 0.57

00:42:06.000 How about it's like Henry Kissinger said about the Iran-Iraq war.

00:42:09.000 Can't they both lose?

00:42:11.000 Bye.

00:42:13.000 Anyway, thanks for calling.

00:42:14.000 All right, let's take a letter.

00:42:17.000 This is from Bill, and he says, Gavin, why didn't you laugh? 0.98

00:42:22.000 When you were showing that heinous old Englishwoman's garbage reggae reggae rap song. 1.00

00:42:32.000 It's not a reggae rap song. 0.98

00:42:34.000 Ryan dropped a zinger, and neither Gavin nor Maddie laughed.

00:42:38.000 Good grammar.

00:42:39.000 He said, she's Rebecca Blacked. 0.86

00:42:42.000 Yes.

00:42:43.000 Come on, dudes.

00:42:44.000 That made me fart.

00:42:44.000 It was so funny.

00:42:45.000 Thank you.

00:42:46.000 I confess I missed that joke.

00:42:49.000 I thought he said Rebecca Black.

00:42:50.000 I thought he just said Rebecca Black or else.

00:42:52.000 Yeah, I didn't hear that.

00:42:52.000 I thought that thought in my head myself.

00:42:54.000 I didn't hear the ED.

00:42:58.000 You promised you had an ED there, Ryan?

00:43:00.000 I did.

00:43:00.000 I had ED.

00:43:01.000 I couldn't get the joke up.

00:43:04.000 Whoa, that was also good in the response.

00:43:06.000 Okay.

00:43:07.000 Not underestimate this.

00:43:09.000 This is the underestimating Ryan episode.

00:43:11.000 It's the Redemption Arc Ep that we've all been waiting for.

00:43:15.000 Okay, last one before we go behind the paywall.

00:43:18.000 Dear Mr. McInnes, the thought has been lurking in my mind for weeks.

00:43:20.000 You're the only person who's ever described prison to me.

00:43:23.000 I've never been and hopefully never will, but you're the only person I've found who ever talks about prison life.

00:43:28.000 Well, I know 0.001 about it, but Maddie Odell here knows quite a bit about it.

00:43:39.000 Spent some time there?

00:43:40.000 Well, you did four hours.

00:43:41.000 I did do four hours.

00:43:45.000 That was jail, though.

00:43:47.000 That was jail.

00:43:50.000 I mentioned this the other night.

00:43:51.000 Max lost all his early time because he got in a fight, but he can't tell us about it because he can't discuss it on JPEG or on the phone or anything. 0.95

00:43:58.000 So who knows what the fuck happened? 0.86

00:44:00.000 But he claims angels were following him. 0.98

00:44:03.000 What do you think?

00:44:04.000 Speaking of prison, what do you think about this, like, work at the cafeteria for a year and a half to get six months off early?

00:44:11.000 Well, everyone has to work in jail, in prison.

00:44:14.000 Everyone has to have a job.

00:44:15.000 You have to have a job?

00:44:16.000 Yeah.

00:44:17.000 I mean, there are no-show jobs in prison, too.

00:44:20.000 Really?

00:44:21.000 Yeah.

00:44:21.000 Well, in the federal system, you would be like, get a job, like what they call PM Compound.

00:44:29.000 And they would just go down and check in with their boss and then just go about whatever they were going to do.

00:44:33.000 But they got paid 98 cents a month.

00:44:38.000 But, you know.

00:44:39.000 98 cents a month?

00:44:40.000 Yeah, the guys that were doing that.

00:44:42.000 I want a raise.

00:44:42.000 I want a dollar a month.

00:44:44.000 You can't even make a collect call with that.

00:44:45.000 But, you know, AM compound like that, you would have some guys walk around the recycle and they clean up.

00:44:53.000 They got the little broom and the dust pan on a stick.

00:44:58.000 We used to call it a Cadillac in prison.

00:45:00.000 Maybe jail is different because there's a mobster at my gym who went to jail for a no-show job in real life.

00:45:07.000 And then the CO was saying, you should get a job here.

00:45:10.000 Make the time go faster. 0.96

00:45:11.000 And then he said, hey, I didn't fucking work out there. 0.96

00:45:14.000 Why would I work in here? 0.97

00:45:15.000 Yeah, I mean, jail sucks because, I mean, I guess it would give you a little bit more movement.

00:45:20.000 Like, usually in jail, you just stay in your block because you're an unsentenced inmate.

00:45:26.000 Well, I would say the reason that I humanize prisoners is because we all assume That it's the cops and the robbers, you know, juvenile view of the world where bad guys are in prison and good guys are not in prison.

00:45:40.000 But that's not the case, especially in an America where everything is illegal.

00:45:45.000 You've probably done three felonies this week and not even known it.

00:45:50.000 So if the state is out to get you, you could end up in there.

00:45:53.000 Mercedes-Carrera did not molest her daughter.

00:45:56.000 She is in jail right now because she was pro-mega.

00:46:00.000 She's sexy and popular and charming, and that was bad for the Dems. 1.00

00:46:04.000 So coincidentally, they found a horrible crime to ruin her life.

00:46:08.000 Max and John got into a 17-second fight, and they threw her away. 0.92

00:46:13.000 They threw the book at them, four years in prison, because it was good for the Dems.

00:46:19.000 Maddie Odell, they were told to crack down on gangs.

00:46:22.000 They couldn't get into MS-13.

00:46:24.000 So they went after white gangs like the Hells Angels. 0.55

00:46:28.000 They spent how much on you?

00:46:31.000 $2 million.

00:46:32.000 $2 million?

00:46:33.000 You need a scalp at that point.

00:46:34.000 I need a scalp.

00:46:36.000 Okay, well, Maddie had a gun at one point in a state that isn't gun-friendly.

00:46:41.000 And he gave it, where's the gun?

00:46:42.000 I don't have it. 1.00

00:46:43.000 Okay, just throw him in fucking jail. 1.00

00:46:45.000 We got to get moving here. 1.00

00:46:46.000 Good stuff.

00:46:50.000 Good stuff.

00:46:51.000 Okay, super chat before we leave.

00:46:53.000 Someone sends in, it's pretty simple. 0.99

00:46:56.000 It's America First Bitch. 1.00

00:46:58.000 Now, this is why I'm a grammar Nazi. 1.00

00:47:01.000 Because you look like a fucking imbecile, Bruce, when you say it's America First Bitch. 1.00

00:47:07.000 You're hurting the movement. 1.00

00:47:10.000 We're not asking you to use the semicolons and fucking Oxford commas every time you walk out your front door, but it's America First Bitch. 1.00

00:47:20.000 Sounds like I'm an America First Bitch. 1.00

00:47:23.000 Like I'm a loser slut who follows around America First like a whore. 1.00

00:47:27.000 America First, by the way, as we learned in the Louis Thoreau documentary, has made this mistake themselves on their stickers. 1.00

00:47:35.000 The proper phraseology is America First, comma, bitch. 1.00

00:47:43.000 Okay? 1.00

00:47:44.000 It's America First, comma, bitch, or else you're an America first bitch. 1.00

00:47:51.000 The commas exist for a reason. 1.00

00:47:53.000 English is the easiest language there is to use, conduct, have the language at your disposal.

00:48:01.000 Okay? 1.00

00:48:01.000 Put a fucking comma after America First, you fucking idiot. 1.00

00:48:05.000 And on that note, let's go behind the paywall and we will continue to enjoy our contributors and criticize them when they're wrong. 1.00

00:48:15.000 Ladies and gentlemen, thank you for enjoying this free episode of Get Off My Lawn.

00:48:21.000 Tomorrow we'll be at AFPAC, but investigating the evils of racism.

00:48:26.000 But on the show, we'll have Maddie's debut of Maddie's Shitty Kitchen. 1.00

00:48:30.000 We will have a TGMS episode number two.

00:48:33.000 And we'll have the Sam Tripoli episode that they were just talking about, as well as, of course, the lovely Wayne Dupree and a myriad of other free, I mean, sorry, post-paywall content.

00:48:47.000 Not a very good ending.

00:48:48.000 But until next time, Cheapskates, get fired, get in trouble, be brave, and never stop fighting. 1.00

00:49:27.000 Was that a tribute to his dick as hard as a metal syringe? 1.00

00:49:32.000 That's not very sexual imagery. 1.00

00:49:35.000 No. 0.99

00:49:37.000 When I think of a syringe going into a vagina, I'm worried about everyone's well-being. 0.98

00:49:42.000 The person, you know, administering. 1.00

00:49:45.000 I got fucked so hard by that syringe needle. 1.00

00:49:48.000 Oh, yeah. 1.00

00:49:50.000 Give me that needle in my pussy. 1.00

00:49:52.000 Literally, needle dick is a pejorative. 1.00

00:49:55.000 It's an insult. 0.99

00:49:57.000 I got to say, Maddie, these potatoes are cooked so perfectly.

00:50:00.000 Dude, I said something.

00:50:02.000 Yes.

00:50:03.000 Every texture was on point.

00:50:05.000 Also learned about the asparagus. 0.99

00:50:07.000 Don't fucking put it in wet. 1.00

00:50:09.000 Let that shit char up first. 1.00

00:50:11.000 Let the skin blister a little bit. 1.00

00:50:12.000 Put a blister.

00:50:13.000 Don't what?

00:50:14.000 Put it away.

00:50:15.000 Put it in the pan, put it in an extremely hot pan and roll it around until the skin starts to blister, then add a little bit of oil. 1.00

00:50:23.000 I was boiling it first like a fucking jerk. 0.99

00:50:27.000 And then also I would put the oil in first. 1.00

00:50:29.000 Nobody.

00:50:30.000 I just thought maybe I was like, I could cook asparagus. 0.99

00:50:33.000 And I fucking can't. 1.00

00:50:35.000 I suck. 1.00

00:50:36.000 Why don't you look it up on the internet? 1.00

00:50:38.000 Good call.

00:50:39.000 Jennifer Tennis on the line.

00:50:41.000 Good call, Gav. 0.79

00:50:42.000 Nailed it again.

00:50:43.000 Hey, guys.

00:50:44.000 Hi.

00:50:45.000 Hey, what's up?

00:50:47.000 How are you?

00:50:48.000 How are you doing?

00:50:50.000 So I'm going to tell you something that will send a chill down your spine.

00:50:54.000 Ooh.

00:50:55.000 So the other day.

00:50:57.000 Can I warn you in advance?

00:50:58.000 Please don't make this about children in duress or it's going to ruin the show.

00:51:04.000 No, no, no.

00:51:05.000 Okay.

00:51:06.000 So there's this series on YouTube that I like to watch where they'll show someone like breaking down a scene in a movie or TV show like a professional.

00:51:19.000 So like maybe if there's a doctor, it'll be like a doctor and he's watching something on, you know, a surgery and he's like, this is how this is what happened. 0.98

00:51:29.000 That's crap. 0.99

00:51:30.000 Yeah. 1.00

00:51:31.000 Well, so the other day I was watching one and it was this man.

00:51:35.000 He was in forensic something.

00:51:37.000 I don't know.

00:51:39.000 And he was probably like 65, so he's been doing it for a long time.

00:51:44.000 And the scene that they were showing, I guess I won't say the movie so I don't ruin it for anyone.

00:51:52.000 But at the end, you guys.

00:51:54.000 No, ruin it up.

00:51:54.000 Come on.

00:51:55.000 This is a ruin festival.

00:51:56.000 Always.

00:51:59.000 Okay.

00:51:59.000 So, seven, you know, at the end when Gwyneth Paltrow's head is in the box?

00:52:05.000 When she what?

00:52:08.000 When Gwyneth Paltrow's head is in the box?

00:52:11.000 Yeah.

00:52:12.000 Okay.

00:52:13.000 So he was breaking that down, and he said that in all of his career, he's only really seen mutilation like that twice, I think you said.

00:52:27.000 And then he said, until COVID, and he said, ever since COVID, I see it all the time.

00:52:36.000 What?

00:52:38.000 Yeah.

00:52:39.000 And this was not a political show, you know.

00:52:42.000 It's just, it was like, it wasn't BuzzFeed, but it was something, you know, it wasn't political.

00:52:50.000 He was just telling, you know, his story.

00:52:54.000 So he's a forensics dude, and since COVID, he's seeing like an arm in a bag and a head in a bag.

00:53:00.000 The implication being that mental illness is out of control with all of these lockdowns and homicidal maniacs are getting crazier than ever before.

00:53:11.000 Yep.

00:53:13.000 Wow.

00:53:14.000 I know.

00:53:16.000 That's juicy.

00:53:17.000 Okay.

00:53:18.000 Thanks for calling.

00:53:19.000 Thank you.

00:53:20.000 Juicy stuff, huh?

00:53:22.000 Yeah.

00:53:22.000 See, and there's no data and statistics on that.

00:53:26.000 They're all like, there's 700 old people in the hospital.

00:53:30.000 Yeah, but what about the long-term damage of children wearing masks for three years when they don't have to?

00:53:36.000 And what's this doing to the loonies who were considering murder, but then decided not to because they have a job and they have medication and they're socially interacting?

00:53:45.000 That's the thing.

00:53:46.000 Humans are naturally social people.

00:53:49.000 Absolutely.

00:53:50.000 So us sane guys can take it on the chin and not socialize as much, although we never stopped going to our local.

00:53:58.000 But the lunatics who don't socialize, they're now pushed over the edge.

00:54:03.000 Everyone near, just like that game that has the coins near the edge, everyone near the edge with COVID has been pushed over the edge. 0.91

00:54:11.000 We're fine.

00:54:11.000 Our coins are way back here.

00:54:13.000 But those nuts, those fucking loonies. 1.00

00:54:17.000 And that is probably a huge part of all this anti-Asian attacks in New York City. 1.00

00:54:25.000 It's not because Trump said it's from China, which it is, by the way. 1.00

00:54:30.000 It's because lunatic assholes are up. 1.00

00:54:34.000 Yeah, they're out there. 1.00

00:54:35.000 Tend to prey on the rice cakes.

00:54:38.000 Like Ryan.

00:54:40.000 Hello.

00:54:41.000 Yeah, people are getting dismembered more frequently.

00:54:46.000 They may not put that in the news.

00:54:47.000 They'll just say it was reported as a death.

00:54:50.000 Yeah, there's a murder.

00:54:51.000 And isn't it funny how that's how we find out from some guy who's comparing Gwyneth Paltrow's decapitated head?

00:54:58.000 He's like a forensic pathologist.

00:54:59.000 He's like, I've only come across this twice.

00:55:01.000 This is why I keep screaming, everyone is interesting.

00:55:06.000 Talk to everyone.

00:55:07.000 When you're in your Uber, how's business?

00:55:09.000 And you talk to a real estate agent, how's business?

00:55:12.000 Always say, how's business to people.

00:55:14.000 At the very least, at the florist, you find out that they're selling less or more flowers than before.

00:55:19.000 That's the most rudimentary information you get from how's business.

00:55:23.000 But if you can spice it up and you talk to someone in NR, you may find out about a lot of beheadings. 0.99

00:55:30.000 Now you know shit, and it's not going through the media's filter. 0.99

00:55:35.000 I was fucking talking to journalists today about Prowboys, and it's just like, it's like working in a sewage plant. 1.00

00:55:43.000 Like I'm just sitting there with my rubber gloves up to here and a pitchfork, just going through the horrible N-word quote they heard, or me saying choke a bitch, choke a tranny, and explaining the context for that and why I said that. 0.99

00:56:00.000 Because they don't watch the show. 0.96

00:56:02.000 They watch the sizzle reel clips they get from Vic Berger and they go, why did you say that? 1.00

00:56:07.000 That's fucked up. 0.99

00:56:08.000 No wonder Max and John are in jail. 1.00

00:56:10.000 You told them to kill people. 0.97

00:56:13.000 That's their mentality. 0.83

00:56:14.000 And you have to sift through that and clean it out. 0.99

00:56:17.000 I really feel like someone with the fire hose, just like washing cow shit off a large iron pallet. 0.97

00:56:25.000 I understand the lack of care for countries such as Ukraine, but isn't compassion for more primitive cultures a defining element of Western culture? 1.00

00:56:34.000 We got plenty of primitive cultures here, by the way.

00:56:37.000 Although conceptually I agree with isolationism, I feel my Western Christian values opposing that ideal.

00:56:42.000 What do you guys think?

00:56:43.000 I think that I'm happy to go out and help the world when we're done here.

00:56:48.000 Even when you see people in Africa like spreading Christianity, I go, is everyone in America a Christian? 0.94

00:56:57.000 Are they all doing great for religion and spirituality? 1.00

00:57:00.000 Like some guy, oh, fucking our office manager here at the studio goes, oh shit, I didn't know you were the vice guy. 0.99

00:57:07.000 Hey, I saw this vice episode where they were giving sight to these people in Africa that had separated cataracts or whatever. 0.99

00:57:15.000 And it was so incredible to see them do this operation.

00:57:18.000 It's not that expensive.

00:57:19.000 It's like $100.

00:57:20.000 And they could see again.

00:57:22.000 You got to see these African poor people see. 1.00

00:57:24.000 I didn't tell them that I had nothing to do with that.

00:57:26.000 I was long gone.

00:57:28.000 But I'm hearing the story going, I didn't say this because you want your office manager, your building to like you.

00:57:34.000 But I was like, can everyone in America see okay? 0.98

00:57:38.000 Before you get on the plane, were you at 100% of the hood and the trailer park and the Virginia fucking ex-miners, unemployed yokels? 0.99

00:57:52.000 Can all the hillbillies see? 0.98

00:57:55.000 Because if the hillbillies can't see, then there's no need to go to the airport.

00:58:00.000 So yeah.

00:58:02.000 There's 8 billion people in the world.

00:58:06.000 I don't have room for that much caring.

00:58:15.000 What should we do now?

00:58:16.000 Let's see.

00:58:17.000 Okay.

00:58:18.000 I found a funny side.

00:58:19.000 Clownpill.news.

00:58:21.000 Okay.

00:58:25.000 Random three-banger for you gents. 1.00

00:58:27.000 Rye Guy, favorite guitar.

00:58:28.000 Gav, favorite watch.

00:58:30.000 Maddie, favorite handgun.

00:58:32.000 Only own, want to own.

00:58:35.000 Thanks for the first time watching live, and it's dope.

00:58:38.000 Well, my favorite watch is obviously this.

00:58:42.000 Sub-Mariner.

00:58:43.000 Sub-Mariner Rolex.

00:58:44.000 Although, my favorite artist, Wes Lang, did a limited edition Grim Reaper Rolex that's $80,000.

00:58:54.000 And I don't even think they're available to man.

00:58:57.000 I would have to have $1 billion in the bank before I would blow $80,000 on a cool Rolex.

00:59:05.000 But Wes Lang is my favorite guy.

00:59:09.000 Very talented chap.

00:59:11.000 And I would want that.

00:59:14.000 You can pull it up anytime.

00:59:18.000 Where is it?

00:59:19.000 Is it Wes Lang?

00:59:20.000 Yeah, WES, Space Lang.

00:59:23.000 I typed in Les Wang.

00:59:25.000 Which typed in Les Wang?

00:59:27.000 Which is what I would like.

00:59:27.000 Les Wang.

00:59:28.000 Okay, so he's got his own cool, like, black Rolex.

00:59:33.000 It's pretty metal. 0.93

00:59:34.000 Wouldn't that be fucking badass to have? 0.88

00:59:38.000 But yeah. 0.96

00:59:40.000 I'm very vain and self-indulgent, but 80 grand?

00:59:43.000 Little rich, little rich.

00:59:45.000 I know him.

00:59:46.000 I contacted him.

00:59:46.000 I was like, can you maybe cut me a deal?

00:59:50.000 And he was like, yeah, I could probably get it for like 70. 0.95

00:59:53.000 That's pretty much fucking more like $500. 0.63

00:59:58.000 Could you just give me one? 0.98

00:59:59.000 Can I just have one?

01:00:01.000 I'll pay you $10 a month for the rest of my life, which is still not a lot of dope.

01:00:08.000 What's your favorite guitar, Rye Guy?

01:00:11.000 Ooh.

01:00:12.000 Ooh.

01:00:15.000 Telecaster, for right now, it's my favorite guitar currently.

01:00:20.000 What is that?

01:00:20.000 Isn't that just the brand?

01:00:22.000 No, no.

01:00:22.000 Fender makes a telecaster.

01:00:24.000 Okay.

01:00:25.000 And Maddie, favorite handgun?

01:00:28.000 My favorite EDC was a Glock 23, subcompact, 40 cal.

01:00:34.000 13 plus 1.

01:00:36.000 Why is it your favorite?

01:00:38.000 It's compact, and 40 cal has a knockdown power.

01:00:44.000 What does that mean?

01:00:45.000 It's a big hole.

01:00:47.000 Oh.

01:00:48.000 Oh, knockdown, meaning you can knock the person down.

01:00:50.000 It hits harder than a 9mm, but it's not as big as a .45.

01:00:54.000 What's 13 plus 1 mean?

01:00:56.000 How many rounds?

01:00:57.000 Well, I bought it before there was a magazine ban.

01:01:02.000 Now you can only have 10.

01:01:04.000 But when I was buying handguns, you were able to get 17.

01:01:07.000 Weren't we talking about this last night?

01:01:09.000 They banned 7 was the max.

01:01:12.000 10.

01:01:14.000 I thought it was 7, but there's no such thing as 7.

01:01:16.000 There's 5 and there's 10.

01:01:18.000 So when they say 7 is the max, that means you can't have a 10, so you end up with a 5.

01:01:23.000 But then companies make it...

01:01:24.000 There's no such thing as a 7.

01:01:25.000 Well, 45 comes with 7.

01:01:27.000 Wasn't that what you were saying, or was it the other dude?

01:01:29.000 It wasn't me.

01:01:30.000 I remember they did something like that where it's like Anthony was complaining about an Opian Anthony.

01:01:35.000 He was like, 45 comes in.

01:01:36.000 I think it's a 7.

01:01:37.000 Oh, maybe it was Anthony.

01:01:38.000 And I eight.

01:01:39.000 One in the tube.

01:01:40.000 Oops.

01:01:42.000 Okay. 0.99

01:01:43.000 Evening fags. 0.99

01:01:44.000 Well, that hurts. 0.99

01:01:46.000 Unnecessary.

01:01:47.000 You know what?

01:01:48.000 Let's take a timeout.

01:01:49.000 Yep.

01:01:50.000 It's hard for Maddie and Ryan and I to get out here.

01:01:54.000 We do our best to entertain you.

01:01:56.000 We want to have fun.

01:01:57.000 Maddie cooked a delicious meal as well as coming out here, answering your questions, trying to contribute to the conversation.

01:02:04.000 It's not easy.

01:02:06.000 And when we come up here, we hope that it's not for naught.

01:02:13.000 And you care about us and you enjoy our company.

01:02:16.000 When we go to the letters page, when we reach in the mailbag and we see the word fags, it cuts us to the quick.

01:02:29.000 Right to the quick.

01:02:32.000 It stabs us to the bone.

01:02:34.000 Bone stab.

01:02:36.000 It makes us...

01:02:39.000 Look, Maddie's pulling a knife. 1.00

01:02:40.000 He's so mad. 0.94

01:02:42.000 He might inflict pain on himself. 0.98

01:02:44.000 He's probably going to cut himself.

01:02:46.000 I've heard Maddie cuts himself. 0.53

01:02:47.000 He's a cutter. 0.98

01:02:49.000 So if you want Maddie to keep cutting himself, if you want me to keep having nightmares, and if you want Ryan, who's now become bulimic since starting this show, that's why he's so slender, then keep calling us fags. 0.99

01:03:06.000 You try. 0.98

01:03:07.000 You try coming out here.

01:03:09.000 You try reading these letters. 0.97

01:03:12.000 You try fucking reading these super chats, doing this show, researching dancehall and TIPA IRI. 1.00

01:03:20.000 You try burying your fucking soul every day, every night. 1.00

01:03:26.000 Ripping your heart out. 1.00

01:03:29.000 Pouring your feelings onto this desk. 1.00

01:03:32.000 Only to be called quote-unquote fags. 1.00

01:03:37.000 A fucking awesome guy. 1.00

01:03:41.000 See, I'm humble folks. 1.00

01:03:43.000 We hate fags. 1.00

01:03:44.000 Fags is the meanest thing you can say to us. 1.00

01:03:47.000 You might as well call us... 1.00

01:03:52.000 Anyway, evening fags. 0.98

01:03:54.000 I heard Maddie name drop Local147 last week. 1.00

01:03:57.000 My dad and grandfather are both Jim McCaffrey.

01:04:00.000 I'm the third.

01:04:00.000 My son's the fourth.

01:04:01.000 We were sandhogs.

01:04:02.000 Yeah.

01:04:03.000 70s to 90s.

01:04:04.000 I was the black sheep.

01:04:05.000 Skipped the union.

01:04:06.000 Joined the Navy.

01:04:07.000 Killed Hadjis. 1.00

01:04:09.000 What a pussy, man. 1.00

01:04:11.000 You fucking didn't, you didn't become a sandhog so you go and indulge yourself playing video games in the Middle East. 1.00

01:04:20.000 I'm wondering if Maddie knew them or had any great stories about them or time spent in the tunnel. 1.00

01:04:25.000 Pissing in guys' boots was one of my dad's specialties. 1.00

01:04:28.000 Proud of your fucking boy. 1.00

01:04:30.000 I worked in 147 towards the later part of my run in the construction unions. 1.00

01:04:40.000 I started off at 731 in 95, and then I switched my book to 147 at the start of the East Side Axis when they connected the Long Island Railroad to Grand Central.

01:04:55.000 So I only worked in the tunnels for about a year.

01:05:00.000 So, no, is the short answer.

01:05:02.000 You don't know Jim McCaffrey.

01:05:03.000 I worked at overnight shift.

01:05:05.000 Here's a weird question for you, Maddie, from Edward.

01:05:10.000 What were you like as a young man?

01:05:14.000 A young man?

01:05:15.000 Like, as an adult? 1.00

01:05:17.000 I don't know what the fuck. 0.99

01:05:18.000 What a weird question. 0.99

01:05:19.000 It's important to check the time of the question sometimes.

01:05:22.000 This came at 10.04 p.m.

01:05:24.000 This guy probably sent this in a blackout.

01:05:27.000 And he would read it in the morning. 1.00

01:05:29.000 You're going, what the fuck? 1.00

01:05:30.000 I don't know. 1.00

01:05:31.000 Why don't you say, wait till we see the manatees tomorrow?

01:05:34.000 Let's say when you were 19, 20.

01:05:39.000 I assume you were a bad boy.

01:05:42.000 I used to travel a lot back then from, I'd say, 17 to like 21, 22.

01:05:49.000 I was always out in the bars having a good time.

01:05:52.000 I used to smoke weed back then.

01:05:53.000 I smoked a lot of weed.

01:05:55.000 Did a lot of acid.

01:05:58.000 I was just enjoying my life, really.

01:06:02.000 I didn't really have a full-time job until I got married and, you know, after 95.

01:06:11.000 That's when I started taking things seriously.

01:06:13.000 But I was always, you know, I had a few brushes with the law.

01:06:17.000 My criminal history goes back to 88.

01:06:19.000 Started around 16. 1.00

01:06:21.000 But, you know, fights, stupid shit like that. 1.00

01:06:24.000 But, you know, I was an all-around guy, you know. 1.00

01:06:30.000 Had my fair share of fist to cuffs and bad nights drinking and experimenting with drugs and lots of girls.

01:06:38.000 I think you, if anyone's curious, just check out the Cockney Reject song Bad Man.

01:06:44.000 And you'll know what Maddie was like when he was young.

01:06:47.000 Can you tell the story about your women's studies class in college?

01:06:50.000 It's my favorite, Robbie Dylan.

01:06:52.000 Robbie Dylan used to edit Vice Magazine back in the day.

01:06:55.000 He was a bit of a Maddie O'Dell character. 0.66

01:06:58.000 He was a criminal, ex-bank robber, but a smart guy.

01:07:03.000 And I have about three major women's studies classes. 0.98

01:07:08.000 Like the guy, Damon Alburn from Fucked Up, I took women's studies in college, not because I gave a fuck about feminism, but because it was the only remotely controversial and interesting course to take. 1.00

01:07:20.000 So you can get in arguments and fights in those classes. 0.94

01:07:25.000 There was one where I think the one he's talking about is we were talking about pornography and she said, who actually likes this?

01:07:35.000 And who wants to watch this or something?

01:07:40.000 And I said, I certainly don't. 0.99

01:07:41.000 And I think the woman said, like, not some faggot like that that's in a woman's studies class, but I mean what actual guys? 1.00

01:07:50.000 And I think my professor said, whoa, whoa, whoa. 1.00

01:07:52.000 And then she got in big trouble for saying the word faggot. 1.00

01:07:55.000 And he said, she goes, no, I didn't mean gay. 1.00

01:07:56.000 And he goes, what did you mean teacup?

01:07:58.000 I'm sorry, Robbie, I'm obliterating the story.

01:08:00.000 I don't really remember that particular one that well. 0.97

01:08:02.000 I can't remember if I was the faggot in that story. 0.93

01:08:05.000 But the other woman's studies thing I remember is we were talking about Zora Neale Hurston. 0.97

01:08:11.000 It's funny how you remember stories that are more important to you and you forget the ones that aren't.

01:08:16.000 But from the punk band Chumbawamba, I learned that Zora Neale Hurston went through a red light.

01:08:24.000 And when she was pulled over by the police, she's a black author, a very talented lady, she said, oh, I'm sorry, officer.

01:08:32.000 I saw the white people going through the green, so I thought the red light was for me. 1.00

01:08:37.000 And he goes, oh, stupid Negro. 1.00

01:08:39.000 I understand. 1.00

01:08:40.000 Okay, you're free to go.

01:08:41.000 So I told that story to my woman's studies professor because we were studying Zora Neale Hurston.

01:08:47.000 And then she got up in front of the class the next day and told the story like it was her story that she discovered. 0.98

01:08:55.000 And I'm sitting there in like row three going, and she just plowed through it, stole the fucking story from me. 1.00

01:09:05.000 Now, at this age of 51, I'm just like, yeah, what a lying-thieving bitch. 1.00

01:09:09.000 Of course she is. 1.00

01:09:10.000 She's teaching feminism. 1.00

01:09:12.000 But back then, I was mortified.

01:09:13.000 I thought we were all friends.

01:09:17.000 I feel terrible.

01:09:18.000 Maybe we can call Robbie.

01:09:19.000 Maybe he's watching.

01:09:20.000 Do you got somebody on the line in the meantime?

01:09:22.000 Or do you want to call him now?

01:09:24.000 I want to call him now.

01:09:25.000 Thinky.

01:09:26.000 Thinky.

01:09:29.000 Then there was the other story where Robbie and I were both in a women's studies class, and we were talking about overpopulation.

01:09:36.000 And I said, everyone's talking about the environment and climate change and the ozone, but it just comes down to population.

01:09:44.000 The more people you have, the more environmental destruction you have.

01:09:47.000 So why aren't you talking about more breeding?

01:09:50.000 And then the feminist said, you're only bringing that up because whites are having less babies and brown people are having more babies and you want less brown people. 0.99

01:09:59.000 I had never even thought of that.

01:10:01.000 Hey, Ryan, did you get that?

01:10:03.000 Yeah, Matty, should I show the whole thing?

01:10:04.000 Yeah, you could show it.

01:10:05.000 All right.

01:10:07.000 There we go.

01:10:08.000 Matthew 47.

01:10:11.000 Okay, we believe you.

01:10:12.000 Don't worry.

01:10:13.000 It was back in 2012.

01:10:15.000 The good old days.

01:10:22.000 Hey, man.

01:10:23.000 Hey, how's it going?

01:10:25.000 Good.

01:10:25.000 Is that the story?

01:10:26.000 Is it the faggot story? 1.00

01:10:28.000 No, it's the story where you're in the women's studies class and the girls were talking about, you know, if we're assertive and we're women and we stand up for ourselves, then guys won't like us. 0.99

01:10:41.000 And you were sitting in the class and the teacher said, well, what about guys like Gavin?

01:10:49.000 And the girls said, no, I mean real guys. 1.00

01:10:54.000 Oh, shit. 1.00

01:10:58.000 Your accent is so weird. 1.00

01:11:01.000 Really?

01:11:02.000 Yeah, I guess it's been a long time since we've spoken in person.

01:11:06.000 It's like Native American. 0.94

01:11:08.000 It's like Indian. 0.98

01:11:10.000 It's watching like good fellas.

01:11:13.000 And then it's Canadian, and then it's French.

01:11:16.000 It's like five guys at once.

01:11:20.000 Yeah, it's a pretty unique accent.

01:11:22.000 It's only me and my brother that have that accent.

01:11:24.000 And like people, people hear us.

01:11:26.000 People hear me in a bar and think, oh, hey, what's my brother doing there?

01:11:32.000 anyways, hey, I'm really enjoying the show.

01:11:35.000 I think it's great.

01:11:35.000 I love everything you're doing, and we look forward to speaking again soon.

01:11:39.000 Okay, see you, man.

01:11:42.000 That guy's got some good stories.

01:11:43.000 You ready for this call?

01:11:45.000 It's a VIP.

01:11:47.000 You and Michael Malice ever kissed and make up.

01:11:49.000 You know what?

01:11:50.000 All of this, like, getting interested in people's various relationships and, like, are you going to talk to this guy?

01:11:57.000 And is Sam high? 0.99

01:11:59.000 Like, it's fucking game. 1.00

01:12:03.000 Why do you care if... 0.99

01:12:05.000 I hung out with Michael Malice like five times in my life. 0.99

01:12:08.000 Why do you give a fuck if we're friends? 0.99

01:12:11.000 He doesn't think about me. 1.00

01:12:12.000 I don't think about him.

01:12:14.000 It's not a thing.

01:12:15.000 This is so queer. 1.00

01:12:17.000 It's like being a little kid and going, I wish Billy Idol and Cindy Lauper would get married because they're both so cool.

01:12:24.000 Stop playing with these figurines in your living room and wishing that this person would like, that person would like this person. 0.99

01:12:33.000 It's fucking embarrassing. 0.97

01:12:36.000 If you're interested in relationships, get into one. 1.00

01:12:39.000 Marry someone.

01:12:41.000 If you've got some beef with a friend and you wish you didn't, then I don't know, make sure that it's worthy of getting over and try to get over it.

01:12:50.000 But like, I wish The Rock was friends with Vince Neal. 0.99

01:12:55.000 It's fucking queer, man. 1.00

01:12:58.000 Fuck off. 1.00

01:13:00.000 What a retarded thing to be concerned about. 1.00

01:13:04.000 Me and Michael Malice, what? 0.93

01:13:08.000 You know, it's crazy because I actually kind of agree with you, Gavin, for once.

01:13:13.000 Good.

01:13:14.000 Like, for a while, I thought that all of your takes were, like, not so good, but this one's actually pretty good.

01:13:21.000 You want to be friends again?

01:13:24.000 No.

01:13:25.000 Oh. 1.00

01:13:25.000 I think you're a closeted homosexual. 1.00

01:13:28.000 You're not an open person. 0.99

01:13:30.000 I'm like, my cards are always on the table.

01:13:32.000 You're always holding your cards at your chest.

01:13:34.000 You're not a fun dude.

01:13:36.000 Okay.

01:13:37.000 But who cares?

01:13:38.000 Like, I'll never think about you again until this question comes up.

01:13:42.000 Neither will I. I'm sure you're not tossing and turning every night in Austin, Texas, wondering what the future for Mike and Gav is.

01:13:49.000 Not even close, Kevin.

01:13:50.000 Okay, good.

01:13:52.000 Yep, not even close.

01:13:55.000 And you know what else is weird about this show or this business we're in? 0.96

01:13:58.000 I'll say something about someone fucking totally random.

01:14:03.000 Like, not Joe Tonelli, but someone with some sort of internet presence. 0.97

01:14:08.000 And I know it goes straight to them.

01:14:10.000 Like when we did that thing with our handicap fan, Crip Daddy. 0.96

01:14:15.000 Handicapped friend.

01:14:16.000 And we were jokingly talking about who's hotter.

01:14:19.000 Isabella DeLuca or Isabelle O'Reilly. 0.99

01:14:22.000 This, by the way, is on a fucking one-way ticket to them. 0.98

01:14:27.000 This talking here. 0.99

01:14:28.000 You're speaking directly to them. 0.96

01:14:29.000 So it was me, who's an old, ugly man, and a crippled kid who's got weird wrists talking about these tens and who's hotter. 0.92

01:14:38.000 That's a funny concept. 0.82

01:14:39.000 I've done it many times.

01:14:40.000 I did my old show.

01:14:42.000 I had a burn victim where we talked about who's a hotter chick and we broke down like girls with cankles and stuff. 0.86

01:14:49.000 It's a parody of the way men see women. 0.94

01:14:53.000 I met her at James O'Keefe's book launch last week and I go, did you see the thing I did with Crip Daddy?

01:14:59.000 And she's like, yeah, yeah, yeah.

01:15:00.000 Everyone sent it to me 100 times.

01:15:02.000 Like, who are these little people?

01:15:03.000 Like, they were talking about you.

01:15:06.000 I don't care.

01:15:07.000 I knew she'd see it, but like, who sits there and clips it and goes, hey, you should know.

01:15:12.000 Or I get it all the time.

01:15:14.000 It's like, hey, Chris DeLeah mentioned you on his show and it wasn't negative.

01:15:19.000 And you're like, well, I guess I'll check it out because he's a famous guy and this might be relevant to the show.

01:15:24.000 So I watch the clip and he's like, I'm turning into right Chris because he's mad about mandates.

01:15:30.000 And then he goes, I'm turning like, I'm like that guy, Gavin McInnes or whatever.

01:15:33.000 And then they move on.

01:15:35.000 Like, they don't even dwell on that.

01:15:37.000 Why'd you send that to me? 0.99

01:15:39.000 Why would I give a fuck that some random comedian mentioned my name for one second? 0.99

01:15:44.000 Is that going in my Gavin Museum? 1.00

01:15:48.000 Grow the fuck up. 0.98

01:15:51.000 Are you and this guy ever going to be friends again? 0.99

01:15:54.000 Why?

01:15:54.000 Do you play with us as cardboard cutouts and make us go to Hawaii together?

01:16:00.000 Work on your own life. 1.00

01:16:02.000 Don't worry about a person, a zealous celebrity said something else about another fucking zealous celebrity. 1.00

01:16:10.000 Jesus Christ. 1.00

01:16:12.000 It's embarrassing.

01:16:16.000 Look at yourself in the mirror and then go, ugh.

01:16:22.000 Aren't you embarrassed?

01:16:24.000 Aren't you embarrassed?

01:16:26.000 We have a caller.

01:16:27.000 One of the journals today, he's like, a lot of the things you say condone violence.

01:16:31.000 Like, for example, you've been quoted as saying fighting solves everything.

01:16:35.000 I go, it's a very common working class saying.

01:16:40.000 It's at every hockey rink and at every boxing gym.

01:16:43.000 And you should be embarrassed that it's something you've never heard of before. 1.00

01:16:47.000 Because it shows that you're a fucking pussy. 1.00

01:16:51.000 I feel like I'm a doad. 1.00

01:16:55.000 Caller from Canada, you're on the line.

01:17:02.000 Caller from Canada.

01:17:04.000 Are you going to be friends with Anthony Cumius' girlfriend soon?

01:17:09.000 Yes?

01:17:11.000 What's up, my name is Kyle?

01:17:13.000 Oh, my brother?

01:17:14.000 Yes.

01:17:15.000 Yeah.

01:17:16.000 Hey, buddy, how you doing?

01:17:18.000 Good.

01:17:19.000 I've got a great story from Ottawa, from the protest.

01:17:22.000 Oh, let's hear it.

01:17:25.000 So, we're hanging out.

01:17:26.000 You know, we're at the front lines.

01:17:29.000 Everybody's partying.

01:17:31.000 And I'm wearing my cowboy hat.

01:17:33.000 And a guy comes up to me and he's like, did you do that on purpose?

01:17:39.000 And I'm like, what do you mean? 0.99

01:17:41.000 Like, I just woke up with a fucking cowboy hat. 0.99

01:17:46.000 Can I send the picture you're talking about to Ryan to show? 0.99

01:17:51.000 Yeah, yeah, of course.

01:17:53.000 And he goes, no, no, no, no.

01:17:55.000 I mean, did you do it on purpose to wear it backwards?

01:18:00.000 And I'm like, oh.

01:18:03.000 Well, no, I mean, I didn't mean to put it on backwards.

01:18:07.000 But, yeah, I mean, thanks for the tip, man.

01:18:10.000 He goes, yeah, yeah, I'm from Georgia.

01:18:13.000 I'm in the American military, and I'm up here training Canadian soldiers and just checking out the protests.

01:18:21.000 So right away, like, you know, all my friends were all over this guy.

01:18:27.000 Like, you know, as soon as you hear someone's a vet, you just, you become gay for them right away. 0.97

01:18:34.000 And we're like, that's so fucking awesome, man. 0.99

01:18:36.000 What are you doing here?

01:18:38.000 And he's like, yeah, you know, I'm training Canadian soldiers. 1.00

01:18:41.000 You know, you guys fucking suck. 1.00

01:18:43.000 I'm from Georgia. 1.00

01:18:46.000 I'm in Delta Force. 1.00

01:18:48.000 Holy shit, Delta Force? 1.00

01:18:50.000 That's so fucking cool. 1.00

01:18:52.000 And like, we can't get enough of this guy. 0.93

01:18:55.000 So we're hanging out with him.

01:18:56.000 And I'm like, what are you doing, man?

01:18:58.000 Like, where are you staying?

01:18:59.000 Do you need a place to stay?

01:19:00.000 He's like, you know, I'm just roughing it.

01:19:03.000 I've got a tent that I'm sleeping in.

01:19:05.000 And I'm like, oh, okay.

01:19:08.000 You can stay at my place.

01:19:09.000 You need a place to stay.

01:19:11.000 Obviously, you're a vet.

01:19:12.000 Thank you for your service.

01:19:13.000 Yeah, you can stay at the place that I bought off dad for 10% over market value.

01:19:19.000 Yeah, to make a profit.

01:19:20.000 Are you in the market for a home in Ottawa that's priced?

01:19:25.000 And so, you know, we're just, we're hanging out with this guy.

01:19:28.000 But the longer we hang out with them, the more like the story is not checking out.

01:19:34.000 Like, wait a minute, you're 25, you're in Delta Force, and I don't think Delta Force guys go around telling everyone they're in Delta Force.

01:19:45.000 Yeah, they don't really say Delta Force.

01:19:47.000 It's known as either CAG, C-A-G, which stands for Combat Application Group, or people in the know just refer to it as the unit.

01:19:59.000 And do you say you're in the unit or do you keep it to yourself?

01:20:02.000 No, they're pretty tight-knit.

01:20:04.000 Hi, I'm James Spond.

01:20:05.000 I'm in MI5.

01:20:06.000 My number is 007.

01:20:08.000 MI6.

01:20:09.000 It's actually MI6, so I know stuff too.

01:20:11.000 Okay. 0.77

01:20:12.000 Yeah, so now I'm doing like, I think now there's like a stolen valor situation, but I don't know shit about the military or Delta Force or anything.

01:20:22.000 So I'm just kind of Googling when he's not looking, like, where did Delta Force train?

01:20:28.000 And then going, hey, so Fort Worth, that's where you train, right?

01:20:34.000 Hoping he would say yes.

01:20:35.000 And I catch him in a lie.

01:20:37.000 And whatever he gets, the answer right. 0.99

01:20:40.000 And I'm like, shit, I got to find a new fucking trivia piece to catch him on. 0.99

01:20:45.000 And yeah, and then I get his phone number. 0.99

01:20:49.000 It's an Ottawa number.

01:20:51.000 You got set up pretty quick there, buddy.

01:20:54.000 Yeah, this went on the whole night.

01:20:57.000 He slept over at my house.

01:21:00.000 And the entire night, I'm just trying to catch him in a lie about being in Delta Force. 1.00

01:21:06.000 He's definitely just some dumb kid. 0.99

01:21:10.000 But in the end, I had way more fun hanging out with a liar than I probably would have hanging out with a Delta Force guy. 1.00

01:21:17.000 Like Joe Donelli.

01:21:18.000 But wait a minute. 0.69

01:21:19.000 You meet someone, they seem sketchy, they're unreliable, and your first instinct is, you should come to my home where I'm sleeping and vulnerable, and you can knife me.

01:21:30.000 He probably killed a Delta Force guy in his sleep and took his identity.

01:21:34.000 You know, my friends are also getting a weird read on him.

01:21:38.000 And so when I go home, I immediately hide a couple firearms that I had out in the open, and I put them away. 0.97

01:21:48.000 And my buddy John, who still hasn't clued into him being a fucking liar, as soon as we walk in the house, John goes, Kyle, where'd you put all the firearms? 0.97

01:21:58.000 We've got to check this out, man. 0.98

01:22:01.000 See, this is because of our age gap being 14 years.

01:22:05.000 I'm half brother, half dad.

01:22:06.000 So I went from loving this story to now I'm just like, Kyle, why are you leaving yourself vulnerable? 1.00

01:22:12.000 You could have been murdered by a fucking wayward slum dog millionaire. 1.00

01:22:17.000 My wayward slum. 1.00

01:22:19.000 Carry on my wayward million dollars. 1.00

01:22:21.000 He's just an idiot kid. 1.00

01:22:23.000 And in fact, he keeps texting me because he left his jacket at my house, which is not really Delta Force kind of things you do. 1.00

01:22:32.000 Just leave your coat around.

01:22:34.000 If we called him, would Maddie be able to suss out his false valor?

01:22:41.000 I'm not an actor.

01:22:41.000 Yeah, why don't you give us his number?

01:22:43.000 Send Ryan his number.

01:22:45.000 Kyle, send Ryan his number.

01:22:48.000 I'll send Ryan his number right now.

01:22:50.000 Okay.

01:22:50.000 And also, I get accused of wearing my cowboy hat backwards, and it's exactly like yours, but it has a label in the back.

01:22:58.000 Yeah.

01:22:58.000 So I put the label here.

01:23:00.000 Is that not what you do?

01:23:04.000 Yeah, I mean, I don't, is it backwards in that picture?

01:23:09.000 Maybe.

01:23:09.000 It looks fine to me, but does your hat have a label?

01:23:13.000 Yes, it does.

01:23:15.000 So you put that at the back?

01:23:18.000 I would imagine it's a little thinner, the brim in the front.

01:23:21.000 Right.

01:23:21.000 And it's a little wider in the back.

01:23:23.000 That pinch is a bit more. 0.99

01:23:23.000 Mine's got a little stitched in square, and I put that at the fucking back. 0.99

01:23:26.000 And then Southerners, or a Southerner, said it's on backwards. 1.00

01:23:29.000 Fuck you. 1.00

01:23:31.000 All right, KY, thanks for calling. 1.00

01:23:36.000 Was this the guy?

01:23:37.000 No.

01:23:39.000 Hello, boys.

01:23:40.000 Constant headache.

01:23:41.000 Joyce Manor.

01:23:43.000 Okay.

01:23:44.000 I don't get that.

01:23:45.000 I don't know who Joyce Manner is.

01:23:48.000 I thought that was a withna joke. 0.99

01:23:52.000 Last time we had a million super chats we didn't get to.

01:23:57.000 Yeah, we're trying to pilot.

01:23:58.000 Are they piling up and we're not going to get to them?

01:23:59.000 Because then I won't read from the.

01:24:01.000 Yeah, I think we should retire the mailbag during the...

01:24:03.000 Unless something comes in that's prescient.

01:24:06.000 Okay.

01:24:06.000 Hey, Gavin, you know the backstory regarding these indigenous grave sites.

01:24:08.000 What's the reality that what was found?

01:24:10.000 If anything, love you.

01:24:11.000 Marie, they were all a lie.

01:24:13.000 It was all a myth. 1.00

01:24:14.000 They saw these sites and they saw these destroyed graves and they thought, holy shit, there's tons of children who were murdered here. 0.99

01:24:22.000 Indians don't really care about graves. 1.00

01:24:24.000 They're into the afterlife.

01:24:25.000 If you lose your toe, you've got to save your toe and Be buried with it, and then your soul goes up there, and now your body's up there.

01:24:34.000 You don't need your body down here.

01:24:35.000 So they don't really have like, you know, gravestones the way we do. 0.98

01:24:39.000 So there was a bunch of fucking broken crosses, whatever, broken sticks. 0.98

01:24:44.000 And everyone just assumed it was a mass grave site. 0.99

01:24:47.000 Trudeau ran with it and said, yes, it's true.

01:24:51.000 Tons of mass child graves all over Canada.

01:24:56.000 So Antifa and the radical left began burning down churches.

01:25:00.000 Zero media coverage.

01:25:02.000 Ezra Levant's the only one who went near it.

01:25:04.000 We got burning churches all over Alberta, Saskatchewan, Calgary, Regina, Winnipeg, all over the sort of Canadian Midwest. 0.99

01:25:12.000 They're burning churches to the fucking ground based on a rumor. 0.97

01:25:16.000 And then they get these seismic x-rays that can go down 100 feet and see exactly what's there. 1.00

01:25:23.000 Guess what they come up with? 1.00

01:25:25.000 Fuck all. 1.00

01:25:27.000 Some old lady grave over here, some old man over there, no child graves, all a myth, all forgotten. 1.00

01:25:36.000 And it was used to help shut down that Polish dude. 1.00

01:25:41.000 I was going to say Roman Polanski, whatever his name is.

01:25:44.000 Arthur Pavlo or something.

01:25:46.000 Arthur Polowski.

01:25:47.000 Polowski.

01:25:48.000 Who keeps getting arrested?

01:25:49.000 Part of the justification was, of course, our horrible past and the Christian church murdering First Nations children, as they're called up there. 0.99

01:25:59.000 All a lie, all a myth.

01:26:01.000 Everyone fell for it. 1.00

01:26:02.000 And as is always the case with this shit, it's gone from the news cycle by the time the truth comes out. 0.99

01:26:09.000 And that's what the left loves. 1.00

01:26:11.000 They start a rumor.

01:26:13.000 They start a thing.

01:26:14.000 Everyone believes it.

01:26:16.000 You go do your diligent research.

01:26:18.000 Someone gets a seismic x-ray machine. 1.00

01:26:21.000 We see they're lying and they're like, oh, that bitch? 1.00

01:26:25.000 It's like Vince Neal. 1.00

01:26:26.000 It's like Motley Crew.

01:26:28.000 You're some groupie sucking off Motley Crew and you get pregnant and you go, hey, I have a baby with you, Vince Neal. 1.00

01:26:36.000 And he's like, bitch, I'm already in Colorado. 1.00

01:26:39.000 I don't even know who you are anymore. 1.00

01:26:41.000 And we're left here pregnant with Vince Neal's baby going, well, you burned down all my churches.

01:26:51.000 Why'd you come in to me?

01:26:53.000 And he's like, sorry, see ya.

01:26:55.000 Wouldn't want to be you.

01:26:57.000 Gotta go.

01:26:58.000 We got an urgent caller, apparently. 1.00

01:27:01.000 Bullshit. 1.00

01:27:01.000 This is Justin. 1.00

01:27:03.000 Justin's worried I'm not friends with Opie.

01:27:05.000 649, you're on the line.

01:27:07.000 Waiting for an hour.

01:27:11.000 You might just.

01:27:16.000 Oh, hey, man.

01:27:18.000 Yeah, I just had to call and kind of touch base with you.

01:27:22.000 My name's Justin.

01:27:23.000 I'm from Ottawa.

01:27:25.000 And, like, you've been talking a lot about bags and stuff tonight.

01:27:29.000 And I got to tell you, it's just been giving me a hard time.

01:27:32.000 Like, I mean, I'm gay.

01:27:34.000 I found your show from some stuff at work.

01:27:37.000 Some people were telling me about it.

01:27:39.000 You know, I checked it out and I just watch it.

01:27:42.000 And I just picture all three of you guys pegging me like you wouldn't believe.

01:27:47.000 And it's just, it's really hard out here, especially in Ottawa. 0.99

01:27:50.000 Some shit's going on at work. 0.99

01:27:51.000 You know, my mom, you know, she banged this Cuban fella. 1.00

01:27:58.000 Fella.

01:27:59.000 So I don't really know my dad.

01:28:00.000 And like, I just want, I just want to tell you, man, like, take it easy on us.

01:28:05.000 It's rough.

01:28:06.000 Yeah. 1.00

01:28:06.000 Dude, you are a fag. 1.00

01:28:08.000 So that sucks. 1.00

01:28:10.000 But imagine not being a fag, a fag and being called a fag. 1.00

01:28:14.000 That's what we're going through. 1.00

01:28:15.000 That's like being white and being called a.

01:28:20.000 Thanks for calling.

01:28:22.000 Good attempt at comedy.

01:28:23.000 That was great.

01:28:25.000 It's important to try.

01:28:26.000 You got to get out there.

01:28:27.000 So we're going to try to call this gentleman.

01:28:29.000 Okay, let's do it.

01:28:30.000 Make outbound call.

01:28:32.000 What was the Navy SEAL?

01:28:33.000 What's he called?

01:28:34.000 Alessandro, Delta Force.

01:28:38.000 I don't know what to call.

01:28:39.000 You can quiz him.

01:28:40.000 I don't know any of that.

01:28:41.000 I don't know much about him other than that.

01:28:43.000 They're secret.

01:28:46.000 I know what I'll do.

01:28:46.000 I'll say I'm from Delta Force.

01:28:48.000 I don't know if anyone's going to pick up, so let's chill.

01:28:50.000 Be cool.

01:28:51.000 Okay, be cool.

01:28:52.000 Everyone, be cool.

01:28:58.000 It's not giving me a dial sound.

01:28:59.000 Okay, why don't you send me the text me the number?

01:29:02.000 Okay.

01:29:10.000 Supposedly it's calling.

01:29:12.000 My Jaguar has arrived.

01:29:15.000 Okay.

01:29:17.000 We can leave a message.

01:29:19.000 Oops.

01:29:20.000 Text me the number.

01:29:21.000 Oh, you did?

01:29:22.000 I did.

01:29:22.000 Okay.

01:29:26.000 This is a little bit of our buddy Donovan.

01:29:32.000 I'm spending a lot of money on my international plan.

01:29:37.000 Stop, Brian.

01:30:10.000 Hello?

01:30:11.000 Hello, who's this?

01:30:13.000 This is Sergeant Pierce Nigler.

01:30:16.000 I understand that you've been telling people that you're a member of Delta Force.

01:30:22.000 Don't know.

01:30:23.000 Wait, number one, how the hell did you get this?

01:30:25.000 Number and number two, I'm from Canada.

01:30:26.000 I don't know how you're going to think that.

01:30:30.000 I'm in the wrong country for that.

01:30:31.000 Isn't Delta American?

01:30:33.000 No, you've been claiming that you're from Georgia and you're in Delta Force, and that endangers our safety as military officers.

01:30:41.000 Well, I'm not Delta Force.

01:30:42.000 I ain't from the state, so I mean, clearly you see the area code on the number.

01:30:47.000 You're right.

01:30:47.000 Well, that's what's confusing us.

01:30:48.000 Why did you pretend you're from Georgia and why are you pretending you're with Delta Force?

01:30:53.000 All I'm saying is I don't know how you got that information.

01:30:56.000 You know how we got that information.

01:30:58.000 You know that we're in an emergency situation and you are putting people in jeopardy.

01:31:02.000 Canada's emergency situation.

01:31:04.000 Yes, and you're in Canada.

01:31:06.000 Stop pretending you're in Delta Force and stop pretending you're from Georgia.

01:31:13.000 Never said any of that stuff.

01:31:14.000 You sure did, Buster Brown. 0.99

01:31:17.000 You sure fucking did. 0.99

01:31:23.000 The only way to fight false valor is more stolen valor. 0.99

01:31:27.000 That's funny.

01:31:28.000 I'm Canadian. 1.00

01:31:29.000 I was lying, fuck. 1.00

01:31:31.000 Then you're like, okay, so why are you lying to a random dude? 1.00

01:31:35.000 Are you trying to fuck him because you're gay? 1.00

01:31:37.000 I got close. 1.00

01:31:38.000 I stayed at his house. 0.97

01:31:39.000 So now my brother is like, some homo is lying to me. 1.00

01:31:42.000 Want to come to my bed? 0.99

01:31:46.000 But didn't he, it sounded like he had a Canadian accent there.

01:31:50.000 Yeah.

01:31:51.000 Your brother didn't pick up on that?

01:31:53.000 I got to say, as a Canadian, like, we're told we have accents.

01:31:59.000 When I first moved to America in the 90s, people would go, a boot.

01:32:03.000 And I'm like, I didn't say a boot.

01:32:04.000 I said about.

01:32:06.000 Well, they say A? 0.98

01:32:07.000 But even there, like, when I'm talking to Robbie, he sounded like fucking Big Joe Muffra. 0.98

01:32:12.000 Yeah. 0.82

01:32:12.000 He's like, hey, remember when you were at the feminism show, and then you were out, did, do. 0.82

01:32:20.000 When Jim Jeffries did his American accent, it sounds like he just cut the shit and sounded normal for a second. 0.95

01:32:25.000 So it was like he wasn't doing any accent. 0.98

01:32:27.000 It was like, oh, finally.

01:32:28.000 Sounds like a dude. 1.00

01:32:30.000 So maybe if you don't have a raging Canadian accent, you sound like a fucking American. 1.00

01:32:36.000 Just a fucking guy. 1.00

01:32:37.000 Fucking guy. 1.00

01:32:38.000 See, I'm getting my fucking accent back. 1.00

01:32:40.000 Just talking about it. 1.00

01:32:41.000 Fuck. 1.00

01:32:42.000 Tony's on the line. 1.00

01:32:43.000 What's up, Tony? 1.00

01:32:44.000 Fuck. 1.00

01:32:45.000 Hey, Gavin, do you know the backstory regarding those? 1.00

01:32:47.000 Wait, we already talked about that.

01:32:48.000 What's up, buddy?

01:32:51.000 I've got a theory.

01:32:53.000 Conspiracy theory. 0.99

01:32:54.000 Okay, you also have a shitty phone. 0.97

01:32:56.000 I believe that as divorce rises and church attendance plummets, children are deprived of the stimulating conversation. 0.98

01:33:06.000 Are you talking on the Fisher-Price satellite that E.T. made in the movie E.T.?

01:33:13.000 Thanks for calling.

01:33:14.000 We can't hear you.

01:33:15.000 Hey, guys, what advice do you have for baby monsters who are also high school teachers? 0.97

01:33:19.000 Get fired. 0.92

01:33:20.000 Get in trouble.

01:33:21.000 Be brave and never stop fighting. 1.00

01:33:23.000 Like, just fucking tell them the truth. 0.99

01:33:25.000 I don't have a problem with critical race theory per se. 1.00

01:33:28.000 I don't have a problem with the ridiculous, retarded theory that America was built on slavery and racism and all that. 1.00

01:33:35.000 You should tell kids that, and then you should tell kids the opposite of that, which is the truth, which is we fought the Indians, rival adversaries, then we won, and we had slaves for a minute. 0.96

01:33:46.000 We didn't start slavery.

01:33:47.000 We ended it.

01:33:48.000 All of that stuff.

01:33:49.000 You know what I've noticed, by the way? 0.99

01:33:51.000 I've noticed that when I talk to people who were assholes in school, like that nerd I was having beers with today, he wrote an article in class at some Catholic university about how women cannot be priests. 0.99

01:34:07.000 He was being taught in class that women can be priests. 0.99

01:34:10.000 He did this thorough investigation on why that's impossible, and he brought in the catechisms and all that.

01:34:16.000 I'm a terrible Catholic.

01:34:17.000 I don't know the details.

01:34:18.000 And he verified it with some Catholic expert, and he submitted it. 0.99

01:34:23.000 And she goes, I got to say, man, most of the stuff I get handed in is half-assed ass kissing. 0.97

01:34:30.000 And that article, that essay you wrote made me very angry. 0.97

01:34:34.000 And that's because it was effective.

01:34:36.000 And you get an A. You spanked me.

01:34:44.000 And then I got this letter from a baby monster this morning, a fan of the show, who goes, you know, you keep calling the left crazy ex-girlfriends. 0.93

01:34:54.000 I don't think that's true anymore. 0.94

01:34:56.000 They're pit bulls.

01:34:57.000 They're pit bulls from a rescue pound who are damaged and vicious. 0.95

01:35:05.000 And if you don't smack them around, then they don't respect you and they bite your face off.

01:35:11.000 But if you do smack them around and establish yourself as the alpha and you're tough and mean and disciplinary, they like it.

01:35:20.000 They like the parameters.

01:35:21.000 They like the discipline. 0.99

01:35:23.000 Just like that teacher liked having her ass handed to on her silver platter, I think a lot of these liberals that are acting out right now, and I'm talking about Biden, Pelosi, AOC, right down to the libs of TikTok, blue-haired retards, they don't like this power. 0.99

01:35:40.000 They don't want it. 1.00

01:35:41.000 They want our discipline. 0.59

01:35:43.000 They want to be slapped around.

01:35:46.000 Definitely metaphorically, possibly literally.

01:35:51.000 So we are at fault for giving them the talking stick and saying, well, what do you want to do today?

01:35:56.000 No, it's like a girl on a date.

01:35:58.000 She doesn't want democracy. 1.00

01:36:00.000 She wants you to pick her up at 8, take her to this restaurant, take her to that thing, then do the jogger upside down, and then fuck her brains out. 1.00

01:36:09.000 Hey, Ryga, have you heard of the Finnish neoclassical death metal band Children of Bottom? 0.99

01:36:14.000 Front man Alexi definitely had the guitar sprinkles, died at 41.

01:36:18.000 Yeah, I definitely heard of them before.

01:36:20.000 Oh, Enrique Dario.

01:36:21.000 Yeah, what's up, Gavin?

01:36:23.000 How you doing?

01:36:23.000 How's it going?

01:36:24.000 Did a fly get in the teleporter with you when you were transporting your molecules to New York?

01:36:31.000 No, these are my glasses.

01:36:32.000 I wear these all the time.

01:36:33.000 You know that.

01:36:35.000 Okay.

01:36:35.000 It's hard to pin my...

01:36:37.000 Like, sometimes I sound Latino.

01:36:39.000 Sometimes I don't.

01:36:41.000 I pronounce my hard R's like this, like, yo, Gavin, that's pretty crazy.

01:36:46.000 We have to go to the supermarket.

01:36:50.000 But otherwise, it's a bad impression overall.

01:36:53.000 Okay.

01:36:54.000 Yep.

01:36:55.000 Next super chat.

01:36:56.000 We've got 20 minutes left.

01:36:58.000 So those are going to trump the calls and the letters.

01:37:01.000 Frankly. 1.00

01:37:02.000 Hey, GNM, the attitude of my Air Force unit about all this is we don't want a war with Russia, but man, we'd love to fight an actually worthy enemy that don't wear pajamas and eat with their ass. 1.00

01:37:17.000 I joint to blow up tanks, not cavemen. 0.99

01:37:24.000 Wow, that's a good one. 1.00

01:37:26.000 Damn. 0.99

01:37:26.000 It's hard to laugh at me. 0.99

01:37:28.000 You want to say that at like a funeral service for one of the servicemen, like, though we lost a hero today, it's worth noting that he died doing what he loves, fighting an actual adversary and not some fucking goat fucker in pajamas. 0.99

01:37:41.000 Am I right? 0.98

01:37:45.000 Hey, Gabder meet or work with MF Doom.

01:37:47.000 I don't know.

01:37:48.000 He's a rap guy.

01:37:49.000 No, I never met him or worked with him.

01:37:52.000 Sorry, Connor.

01:37:54.000 Why don't you develop an interest in some white artists?

01:37:57.000 Should I fight for a girl who I really liked?

01:37:59.000 She just ended it. 0.99

01:37:59.000 It was long distance, an age difference. 0.99

01:38:01.000 22, her, me.

01:38:02.000 30, me.

01:38:03.000 More details in Mailbag. 0.99

01:38:04.000 If you see it, Wisconsin, gay. 1.00

01:38:07.000 Let's forget the gay part, right? 1.00

01:38:09.000 Unless it's a lesbian? 1.00

01:38:12.000 Is it a lesbian? 1.00

01:38:13.000 Gay relationships don't matter. 1.00

01:38:15.000 They're a dime a dozen. 1.00

01:38:16.000 They're like flies.

01:38:17.000 They have a shelf life of a day.

01:38:21.000 But yeah, that's not enough details to make a...

01:38:24.000 Ask Maddie what the steak is seasoned with.

01:38:26.000 Salt.

01:38:27.000 Just salt.

01:38:31.000 And pepper.

01:38:34.000 Right.

01:38:35.000 And pepper.

01:38:37.000 Was that steak seasoned with salt?

01:38:40.000 How long did you cook it for?

01:38:42.000 I think it took about 12 to 13 minutes.

01:38:46.000 And what do you get the stove up to?

01:38:49.000 Well, I cooked it on medium high heat and a cast iron skillet.

01:38:53.000 Did you put a cover on top?

01:38:55.000 We don't want to spoil everything for the show.

01:38:58.000 Butter bathe.

01:38:59.000 This recipe is going to be available on Maddie's hit new show, Maddie's Shitty Kitchen, tomorrow. 0.94

01:39:04.000 It's only about 15 minutes, the show.

01:39:08.000 Well, down to?

01:39:09.000 I don't know if that's the final cut, but that was my estimate.

01:39:12.000 Ryan, why are you so worried?

01:39:13.000 What are you going to spoil it?

01:39:14.000 No one's going to watch it?

01:39:15.000 Yes.

01:39:17.000 Can't give away the cows.

01:39:18.000 Censored.tv works.

01:39:20.000 Milk for free.

01:39:22.000 Can't wait to see you guys at AFPAC.

01:39:23.000 Gavin was my original red pill on this show, and it's helped me a lot for almost five years now, okay?

01:39:28.000 Gavin, you mentioned the flat earth.

01:39:29.000 There's a few times you've ever had David Weiss on.

01:39:32.000 Yes, I had him on my old show, the Gavin McInnes show.

01:39:35.000 Reasonable guy, smart guy, crazy person who thinks the earth is flat.

01:39:40.000 He actually thinks it's shaped like a contact lens, and there's dozens of them all over this gigantic tundra.

01:39:47.000 It's convexed.

01:39:48.000 And I'm like, no, everything's flat.

01:39:51.000 It's a flat tundra, but there's these contact lenses that one is Earth, one's another thing, one's another thing.

01:39:58.000 And we're not allowed to visit the other one.

01:39:59.000 Like we're on an ice planet, and that's like a melted piece of sky.

01:40:01.000 And he couldn't come up with why.

01:40:04.000 Like, what's the motive?

01:40:05.000 I think there's an easy why.

01:40:07.000 And I think I know the easy why.

01:40:09.000 Okay, what's the why?

01:40:10.000 It would be to have the people that know, they have their own little areas, and then we just have...

01:40:16.000 Oh, this is everything for us.

01:40:19.000 Okay, but say you're the elite.

01:40:20.000 Why don't you have a Jeffrey Epstein Island?

01:40:23.000 Like, there's plenty of places on Earth you can have.

01:40:25.000 Well, I think these are upper, like, lizard-like.

01:40:28.000 Why would elites need a whole planet?

01:40:32.000 A whole contact lens?

01:40:33.000 I don't know.

01:40:33.000 Did you say lizard?

01:40:35.000 Potentially.

01:40:37.000 Who knows?

01:40:37.000 So lizard people live underground, Ryan.

01:40:40.000 Oh, that's true.

01:40:40.000 In the Midwest.

01:40:41.000 I don't know if I believe in the lizard.

01:40:43.000 Get it straight.

01:40:44.000 And of course, that little segment will be rocket shipped over to David Weiss.

01:40:49.000 It'll be clipped and sent to him. 0.98

01:40:52.000 Would you guys rather receive the most incredible, unbelievable blowjob while blindfolded, mystery blower, or receive a meh, BJ, from a true 10? 0.99

01:41:00.000 It's so easy. 0.99

01:41:01.000 Obviously a man. 1.00

01:41:02.000 I don't want to get sucked off by a fag dirk. 1.00

01:41:06.000 Next brain teaser. 0.99

01:41:08.000 Gavin, Lent starts this Wednesday.

01:41:10.000 Does it?

01:41:15.000 It really creeps up on you.

01:41:18.000 I'm going to start chugging whiskey now.

01:41:20.000 I will get my ashes and I'll just do what I always do.

01:41:23.000 For Lent, I'll quit whiskey.

01:41:25.000 Attend Latin Mass?

01:41:26.000 Yes, I will attend Latin Mass.

01:41:28.000 Love it.

01:41:30.000 Hey, Gav, I heard that the, not the Pope, but the church in general is trying to shut down Latin Mass.

01:41:37.000 Right when it was becoming popular with young people for some bizarre reason. 0.99

01:41:41.000 The Catholic Church is a fucking mess right now, as is the entire Western world. 0.99

01:41:46.000 Hey, Gav, was there a crossover between punks and metalheads? 1.00

01:41:49.000 Yes, it was called D-Punk, and it was started by the band Discharge.

01:41:54.000 Lots of other bands followed suit after Discharge, Farookers, maybe GBH in a way.

01:42:04.000 The list goes on, but eventually the problem with punk is you get good at your instruments, and going isn't satisfying.

01:42:13.000 Were punks listening to Priest and Maiden and shit? 0.96

01:42:15.000 No. 0.98

01:42:16.000 When I was a kid, discharge was the closest you could get to metal, but metalheads would fight us and often win. 0.97

01:42:25.000 So Maiden and Priest and shit was bangers. 0.85

01:42:28.000 But you know what was weird? 0.91

01:42:29.000 Later on in the late 80s, nerds started getting involved in the heavy metal scene.

01:42:35.000 So there'd be like retarded metalheads who smoked a pack of cigarettes a day, and then guys hanging out with them who had long hair, and then giant glasses with Coke bottle lenses who had straight A's in math. 0.99

01:42:49.000 Maybe they liked the intricacy of the solos.

01:42:52.000 Anyway, next. 1.00

01:42:56.000 Your fans request a walk-off or just show us your tits. 1.00

01:43:00.000 Proud of your boy. 1.00

01:43:01.000 I don't know what that means.

01:43:02.000 You want me to leave the show now?

01:43:03.000 Oh, like a walk-off? 0.99

01:43:04.000 Like a fucking bond, like a cat walk-off? 0.99

01:43:09.000 There's no such thing as a cat walk-off. 1.00

01:43:13.000 Is this enough to buy the show notes?

01:43:15.000 Also, Mr. Ryan, is it too much trouble for you to tell me how you do the live green screen?

01:43:20.000 Is it an overlay or something?

01:43:22.000 No.

01:43:23.000 We have a green screen here in the studio, and then I stand in front of it, and that's how we do the green screen.

01:43:27.000 And you can key it out, you see.

01:43:29.000 So like if I were to make this.

01:43:30.000 How do you do the green screen?

01:43:32.000 With a green screen.

01:43:35.000 I could green screen this jammy right here for the most part.

01:43:38.000 I don't want to tweak it too much, but I, you know, we would just.

01:43:41.000 Yeah, if you send Ryan your address for $100, I'll send you the show notes.

01:43:46.000 That's true.

01:43:47.000 I did that last week.

01:43:49.000 That's true.

01:43:49.000 Good evening, fellas.

01:43:50.000 Okay, next.

01:43:51.000 For someone who rightly laments the mental obesity of the left, it's painfully obvious you've done zero research on the alleged quote-unquote book banning of mouse. 0.98

01:44:01.000 They didn't fucking ban it. 0.95

01:44:02.000 It was just taken off the eighth grade curriculum list. 0.99

01:44:05.000 Please stop perpetuating this blatant lie.

01:44:08.000 No, that's banning.

01:44:10.000 Like, no one thinks when you ban a book, it's not for sale anywhere in town, but it has been banned from a reading list.

01:44:20.000 That is banned.

01:44:21.000 Any kind of banning is banning.

01:44:23.000 And it was a right-wing school.

01:44:26.000 They thought that there was profanity in it. 0.99

01:44:28.000 I think he says damn it a few times. 0.99

01:44:30.000 And there was nudity in it, which is superfluous and silly. 0.99

01:44:34.000 It's not sexual. 1.00

01:44:35.000 It was naked fucking POWs. 0.99

01:44:38.000 So it's ridiculous that the right removed it from an eighth-grade curriculum list. 1.00

01:44:43.000 It should be on that list.

01:44:44.000 It's a great way to learn about World War II and the Holocaust. 1.00

01:44:48.000 So fuck you. 1.00

01:44:50.000 We have 206 on the line. 1.00

01:44:52.000 206, can you hear us?

01:44:55.000 You might have to say hi if they can't hear me.

01:44:57.000 Go ahead, 206.

01:44:58.000 Hi.

01:45:00.000 Hey, 206.

01:45:04.000 Oh, man.

01:45:05.000 All right, you blew it, 206.

01:45:06.000 You shouldn't have gone poo.

01:45:08.000 That's a lesson for the show tonight, guys.

01:45:11.000 Don't go poo. 0.96

01:45:14.000 Hey, I just want to say that you're an American hero.

01:45:15.000 I'm 20 years old, listening to your podcast since 2019.

01:45:18.000 I love when young people think that three years is a long time.

01:45:22.000 Dude, you and I go way back.

01:45:24.000 I've been following you since CRTV.

01:45:28.000 Oh, when I was 50?

01:45:30.000 That was like not even two years ago, or like maybe three.

01:45:36.000 My question is, do you think Bob Odenkirk was a conservative at any time in his life before he went woke?

01:45:40.000 No.

01:45:42.000 Bob Odenkirk's always been a lefty.

01:45:46.000 I don't know why.

01:45:48.000 I know it's an ancient Chinese secret, but regarding that debate with the gamer dude, who won is really a matter of what your goal was.

01:45:52.000 If you wanted to give your listeners a laugh, then you accomplished your goal.

01:45:56.000 But if you want to influence that handful on his side, whom I consider your opinion, nothing.

01:46:03.000 Where's my tax-deductible receipt?

01:46:05.000 Boring.

01:46:07.000 I don't like these. 0.99

01:46:09.000 I like raising money for people, but sup fags, I have a comment about the drug war. 1.00

01:46:14.000 I've been a patrol officer. 0.90

01:46:15.000 Okay, I like this.

01:46:16.000 For just over five years, and I've seen many violent assaults, including murders perpetuated by meth users and many forms of theft by opioid users.

01:46:26.000 The violent assaults weren't perpetuated by someone who just happened to be a me.

01:46:32.000 To be a me?

01:46:34.000 No, the setup Ryan has here means people get cropped.

01:46:42.000 Violent assaults by meth users, I don't think would be changed by legalizing drugs, but it wouldn't go up or down.

01:46:50.000 As far as the theft by opioid users, it would be changed because they wouldn't be stealing for their opioids.

01:46:58.000 I mean, it's not like legalizing drugs means there's no more crime.

01:47:04.000 I'm not saying it'll be a utopia, but what I'm saying is things won't get worse.

01:47:08.000 And we'll lose these gangs.

01:47:10.000 Who's there on the line?

01:47:13.000 I hear you.

01:47:14.000 We hear you.

01:47:15.000 Either you're 206 or 350.

01:47:17.000 Hello?

01:47:20.000 Hello?

01:47:21.000 Hey there, buddy.

01:47:22.000 Hello?

01:47:24.000 Speak!

01:47:31.000 Are you trying to make me...

01:47:33.000 Hello?

01:47:37.000 I don't know what 206 is.

01:47:39.000 Who cares?

01:47:40.000 You hear me saying hello?

01:47:41.000 You're saying hello.

01:47:42.000 Let's discuss things.

01:47:45.000 Okay.

01:47:46.000 How early is too early for me to ask my girlfriend to marry me and then after that get married and have kids?

01:47:56.000 How long have you guys been dating?

01:48:00.000 Well, we've worked together for over a year, dated for like two months.

01:48:07.000 And how old are you?

01:48:10.000 I'm 24.

01:48:11.000 She just turned 20.

01:48:13.000 Yeah, let's slow your roll a little bit here, bro.

01:48:17.000 Why don't you guys keep things going, decide to move in together, and if after living together for six months to a year, there's been no drop-down, drag-out fight, then put a ring on it. 1.00

01:48:34.000 And the second you put a ring on it, knock up a bitch. 1.00

01:48:38.000 Fucking jizzen her. 1.00

01:48:41.000 There's no waiting once the ring is on. 1.00

01:48:43.000 Why bother?

01:48:44.000 I don't get those people who are like, we want to try out being married for a while.

01:48:48.000 What?

01:48:50.000 You tried out just dating.

01:48:51.000 It's called just dating.

01:48:53.000 But yeah, you seem to be rushing a little bit, my friend.

01:48:56.000 In a perfect world, of course, you'd propose to her right now, but we're not living in a perfect world.

01:49:02.000 And your girlfriend's being bombarded with a lot of brainwashing. 1.00

01:49:06.000 We just talked about that guy who got a no when he proposed to his girlfriend.

01:49:11.000 So I would say go against Christianity and live together out of wedlock. 1.00

01:49:17.000 Live in sin for six months to a year. 1.00

01:49:19.000 And then if you both still feel like it, then fucking get a ring on her. 0.99

01:49:25.000 Yeah, slow your own. 0.99

01:49:27.000 I had heard what you had said about, you know, not wasting the best years of a girl's life.

01:49:34.000 So I take that to heart, and I just don't want to drag her on for any more than I possibly have to without marrying her.

01:49:42.000 I can't tell if this is a trick or something.

01:49:44.000 28 is 27 is...

01:49:46.000 It's not science or math.

01:49:48.000 Is this a prank?

01:49:49.000 You got to feel it out, sir.

01:49:50.000 She's 20.

01:49:51.000 She's got plenty. 0.97

01:49:52.000 She could make you 16 kids. 1.00

01:49:55.000 Yeah, let's wait until it's like eight.

01:49:57.000 Yeah.

01:49:57.000 28 is 15.

01:49:59.000 The plan is six kids, so we got to get seven.

01:50:02.000 Yeah, you're okay.

01:50:03.000 You're good.

01:50:03.000 Just wait a little bit.

01:50:05.000 She might have venereal warts. 1.00

01:50:07.000 She might have a dick. 1.00

01:50:08.000 You're getting the fade. 1.00

01:50:10.000 All right.

01:50:10.000 Thanks for calling.

01:50:12.000 We got another one.

01:50:13.000 I started that whole thing to stop these guys who date a woman for eight years from like 25 to 32 and then dump her.

01:50:20.000 And then there's a guy who's like, hey, man, I'm horny. 0.99

01:50:23.000 Should I marry this chick I fucked? 1.00

01:50:26.000 Look at this asshole with his motherfucking dollar signs. 1.00

01:50:31.000 Jeremy, you need to go fuck yourself. 1.00

01:50:34.000 I'm not reading one word of your stupid note because you don't know how to write the English language. 1.00

01:50:42.000 You can stay in the middle of the day. 1.00

01:50:43.000 Oh, wait a minute.

01:50:44.000 I get it.

01:50:45.000 He's trying to make me mad.

01:50:46.000 Okay.

01:50:48.000 Congratulations.

01:50:50.000 You did make me mad. 1.00

01:50:52.000 He wants to fuck you while wearing Ryan's heels. 1.00

01:50:54.000 Interesting. 1.00

01:50:55.000 You got me.

01:50:56.000 You got me.

01:50:57.000 Congratulations.

01:50:58.000 That oldest video in the world and the worst mistake in the history of the English language.

01:51:02.000 Dear Miss McKinnis, I want to apologize for misspelling your name last week.

01:51:05.000 Also, I recommend you convert to Protestantism. 0.56

01:51:08.000 No, thank you.

01:51:08.000 Next, let's power through these.

01:51:11.000 What's up, faggots? 1.00

01:51:13.000 You guys are the fucking best. 1.00

01:51:14.000 How about states taking the land in their states and making them sanctuary areas? 1.00

01:51:18.000 That's gay. 1.00

01:51:19.000 Also, where the hell are the billionaires in America finding the good fight? 1.00

01:51:21.000 Great point.

01:51:22.000 Although there are plenty donating to guys like Ben Shapiro and Jordan Peterson and me.

01:51:29.000 No, not quite me.

01:51:30.000 We need mainstream media outlets at the very least.

01:51:32.000 Keep it up, guys.

01:51:33.000 We need you.

01:51:35.000 Jersey Patriot.

01:51:37.000 I mean, yo, from Charlotte, North Carolina, I went to Philadelphia for the first time to visit a friend and see Tool.

01:51:42.000 Blew my mind how impoverished and sketchy most of the outskirts of the city were. 0.98

01:51:47.000 Made me feel naive to how truly fucked America's huge inner cities are. 0.98

01:51:51.000 I've been to LA, Atlanta, New York City, but Phil. 1.00

01:51:54.000 Philadelphia.

01:51:54.000 Maddie.

01:51:55.000 Yeah, Philadelphia is a fucking. 1.00

01:51:57.000 Toole concert? 1.00

01:51:57.000 That hits close to home. 1.00

01:51:59.000 Yeah, I could have went yesterday.

01:52:01.000 But we had stuff to do.

01:52:02.000 We had business to advance.

01:52:03.000 He's a man of his word, and he passed up.

01:52:06.000 And I told him, I was like, we could have done another day.

01:52:08.000 And then I was like, no, don't let him know we could have done another day.

01:52:10.000 Because now it's in vain.

01:52:11.000 So I was like, I wouldn't have won anyway.

01:52:13.000 I had a commitment.

01:52:14.000 Man of your word.

01:52:15.000 Just let you know, some behind the scenes.

01:52:17.000 Maddie Odell.

01:52:18.000 Well, for the record, Maddie, I would have forgiven you if you can on it.

01:52:23.000 I mean, it's a first episode.

01:52:24.000 It's not like, like, this is a live show.

01:52:26.000 You can't miss the live show.

01:52:28.000 But the first episode of a new series.

01:52:30.000 Yeah, but I've seen Tool a few times.

01:52:31.000 I've seen A Perfect Circle a few times. 0.98

01:52:33.000 Well, if it's any consolation, Tools suck. 0.97

01:52:37.000 You know, I make to differ. 0.98

01:52:40.000 Dude, what was my opinion? 0.99

01:52:42.000 What was with the bar today with the fucking music? 1.00

01:52:44.000 I'm trying to talk to my intrepid nerd friend who already talks like a mouse. 1.00

01:52:50.000 And they're playing the chili peps and fucking Metallica and so loud. 0.99

01:52:57.000 You played that after I left. 0.99

01:52:58.000 It's an old man bar.

01:53:00.000 What's with the music?

01:53:01.000 I don't know. 0.88

01:53:02.000 And I'm taking a piss with that guy you were sitting next to, who's got kind of a beard. 0.94

01:53:08.000 He kind of looks like you and me had a baby. 0.99

01:53:12.000 So a hot ass baby. 1.00

01:53:13.000 He's sitting next to me. 0.99

01:53:14.000 Yeah, at the end of the bar. 0.99

01:53:16.000 And I'm like, who's playing this fucking music? 0.99

01:53:19.000 He's like, it might be me. 1.00

01:53:21.000 Oh, that's probably Billy.

01:53:22.000 And I'm like, dude, I'm trying to talk to my friend. 0.99

01:53:25.000 I can't hear shit with your chili peppers. 0.99

01:53:28.000 And he's like, well, it's sort of like commercials. 0.99

01:53:30.000 Like, they come on louder than you think.

01:53:31.000 And it's up.

01:53:32.000 Yeah, see, the thing in that place, the jukebox, if nobody puts money in it, it plays random songs.

01:53:42.000 Stop! 1.00

01:53:45.000 Until you put money in, then it'll cut the song off that's playing and play your selections.

01:53:51.000 So it could have been anybody, like nobody playing the music.

01:53:54.000 That's got to be.

01:53:55.000 And they do play pretty crappy songs when you're not putting money in it.

01:54:00.000 Do you think the Truckers Convoy headed to Washington, D.C. is a trap, sort of like the meandering?

01:54:04.000 I know people are leaving D.C. Something is fishy about the American Convoy.

01:54:09.000 I hear it's really badly organized.

01:54:12.000 The times seem to keep changing.

01:54:16.000 Something fishy's going on.

01:54:17.000 I don't think it's a trap like J6 was, but.

01:54:22.000 Like, what are they going to do?

01:54:23.000 Just park?

01:54:25.000 I mean, if that's what they're going to do.

01:54:26.000 Well, they say they're going to block off the roadways to even get into DC.

01:54:30.000 The beltway or whatever it's going to do?

01:54:32.000 The beltway, yeah.

01:54:32.000 The loop or whatever.

01:54:33.000 And then they go.

01:54:34.000 So the truckers say, okay, we'll block the beltway.

01:54:38.000 Maybe we can just put these up and not read them. 1.00

01:54:41.000 What's up, Faggots? 1.00

01:54:43.000 Love you, Faggots. 1.00

01:54:45.000 See, now that you said that in the beginning of the show about how it's so hard to come up here and work, every one of these is addressing us. 1.00

01:54:55.000 Which hurts even more because we've already addressed it. 0.98

01:54:58.000 I'll give reading letters a try, you fags. 1.00

01:55:00.000 Robert Mick Robertson. 0.99

01:55:02.000 Remember in the movie Gummo when they screw a process?

01:55:04.000 You got to make a moment.

01:55:06.000 You feel sick to your stomach?

01:55:07.000 That was 97.

01:55:08.000 He ran 22 in the Victoria's Secret.

01:55:09.000 Probably thinks that scene is hot.

01:55:11.000 You go, girl.

01:55:11.000 Great point.

01:55:12.000 I'm on Smoco, so leave me alone.

01:55:14.000 Smoco.

01:55:16.000 Aimbot Targets is a ballistic steel processing company.

01:55:20.000 We focus our attention on providing top-quality shooting targets produced from AR-600 Armor and AR-500 Steel.

01:55:26.000 We offer a variety of targets that were designed to make shooting easy and safe.

01:55:31.000 Aimbot's products are produced under a V. I think we got a loophole advertisement for $100.

01:55:38.000 That's fine.

01:55:39.000 Yeah.

01:55:40.000 I'll read an ad for $100.

01:55:41.000 Steel targets?

01:55:41.000 Great.

01:55:42.000 $100 is a lot in commissary. 0.99

01:55:46.000 Hey, fags, I was just dumped recently. 0.99

01:55:48.000 Can I get a pep talk? 1.00

01:55:49.000 I want to fuck you. 1.00

01:55:50.000 Brent, you need to fuck some fives. 1.00

01:55:52.000 Yeah. 1.00

01:55:53.000 Get back out there.

01:55:54.000 Stop playing the field.

01:55:55.000 Five fives.

01:55:56.000 Five fives.

01:55:58.000 Five fives.

01:56:00.000 That's what you got to do. 1.00

01:56:01.000 You have to fuck her out of your system. 1.00

01:56:04.000 The last thing you need to do is stay home and watch TV in your PJs and cry like a little bitch. 1.00

01:56:10.000 Hey, Gavin, Ryan, and Maddie, have you guys listened to InfoWars lately? 1.00

01:56:13.000 It's on banned video.

01:56:14.000 Yes, please watch it to expose the globalists.

01:56:16.000 Gavin, I hope you become more and more of a Catholic.

01:56:18.000 Blah, blah, blah.

01:56:19.000 Ryan is hilarious.

01:56:20.000 Maddie makes a good conversation. 1.00

01:56:21.000 A good lawn.

01:56:22.000 A good lawn.

01:56:24.000 You could do that.

01:56:24.000 Did you see this whole thing going around where in October, Alex Jones goes, I've been having nightmares.

01:56:32.000 I feel like there's going to be a major war in February.

01:56:36.000 Really?

01:56:37.000 Yes.

01:56:39.000 I've got a really bad feeling that the globalists are going to take over and they're going to get their wish in February.

01:56:47.000 Someone tweeted out, they go, he must be getting sick of being right all the time.

01:56:53.000 He's got a pretty good average.

01:56:55.000 Yeah.

01:56:59.000 Okay. 0.83

01:57:01.000 You know, if you're thinking about, you know, war coming to you, maybe check out Aimbot's targets and you could, you know, sometimes I think that shoot them down and fucking that Alex has sources that are way better than anyone's sources.

01:57:15.000 Remember, he's been doing this for half a century almost.

01:57:18.000 Deep state guys.

01:57:20.000 So, like, we have, you know, a state trooper and a cop and some military dude, but he has like dudes.

01:57:30.000 And maybe he has dudes who make these decisions and say, like, we got to go to war in February.

01:57:36.000 And someone else goes, really?

01:57:38.000 Do we got to do that?

01:57:39.000 Yeah, we got to do it. 1.00

01:57:40.000 And he's like, fuck that. 1.00

01:57:41.000 And then he calls Alex and goes, these assholes are going to war in February. 1.00

01:57:45.000 Yo, Maddie, what cut of meat do you recommend for the best steak? 1.00

01:57:48.000 You said this already.

01:57:48.000 My favorite is a ribeye.

01:57:50.000 Yes.

01:57:51.000 Have you ever been drugged at a bar?

01:57:53.000 I've had someone slip something in my drink once or twice, and it's a very strange thing to experience as a man.

01:57:57.000 I've drugged myself at a bar.

01:58:00.000 I drugged my nose. 1.00

01:58:03.000 But yeah, why would a dude drug a dude, I guess, to rape him up the butt? 1.00

01:58:07.000 Gavin, Wisconsin gay back, not gay. 1.00

01:58:09.000 Just thought it was a funny name.

01:58:10.000 Okay.

01:58:11.000 Difference in age, distance and age difference.

01:58:14.000 Fight it or no?

01:58:16.000 Yeah, dude.

01:58:17.000 Distance and...

01:58:18.000 We don't know the details.

01:58:20.000 Sorry.

01:58:20.000 That's not the kind of thing you can solve.

01:58:22.000 Fuck. 1.00

01:58:22.000 That's an annoying question. 1.00

01:58:24.000 Should I go for...

01:58:25.000 Like, we don't even know what anyone looks like or anything.

01:58:28.000 Pursue it, man.

01:58:30.000 Find your...

01:58:31.000 Pursue your love interest, dude.

01:58:34.000 You can get her.

01:58:35.000 You got this.

01:58:37.000 Anyway.

01:58:38.000 Not Ryan at all.

01:58:40.000 No, this is not me.

01:58:41.000 No.

01:58:42.000 Gavin, I'm really, I mean, Ryan is a really good employee, and I'm not all retired.

01:58:45.000 I think Ryan needs a raise.

01:58:46.000 Oops, I broke something.

01:58:47.000 Not Ryan at all.

01:58:48.000 Okay, that's enough of that.

01:58:50.000 We could go on forever with those people.

01:58:52.000 Thank you for tuning in, folks. 0.99

01:58:54.000 We're gone tomorrow, but we'll fill up the show with plenty of shit to look at. 0.98

01:58:58.000 And in the interim, get fired. 0.99

01:59:03.000 Get in trouble.

01:59:04.000 Be brave and never stop fighting.

01:59:15.000 Emergency, Mr. Doctor Mon.

01:59:17.000 Yaffi Bring come your medication. 1.00

01:59:19.000 And you give me some of your love potion.

01:59:22.000 Give me the chance on it.

01:59:24.000 Emergency, Mr. Doctor Mon.

01:59:26.000 Yaffi Bring come your medication. 1.00

01:59:29.000 And you give me some of your love potion.

01:59:31.000 Give me the champion.

01:59:36.000 My reaction won't do the boy in my reflection.

01:59:38.000 To me, I'm your channel with my name.

01:59:44.000 Baby, I'm answering.

Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - February 25, 2022

GOML LIVE #137 - UNDERESTIMATING RYAN

Episode Stats

Summary

Transcript