Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - GOML LIVE #142 Part 2 - Piña Colada Harris

00:00:01.000 Okay, let's try now.

00:00:04.000 Without restarting, I just clicked off and then clicked back on.

00:00:08.000 Okay, I just quit the app.

00:00:10.000 This is not making for very exciting smell-ovision.

00:00:12.000 We can put it up to the next one.

00:00:13.000 Click the live tab.

00:00:15.000 Oh, oh, oh, okay, coming back.

00:00:18.000 We're back.

00:00:19.000 Now, we're going to do we're back.

00:00:25.000 Explaining this, if you're right.

00:00:27.000 Okay.

00:00:31.000 Hi.

00:00:33.000 We went down recently, the internet cut off, because we were swatted not by police, but by the National Ethics Committee.

00:00:42.000 They just kicked down the door and said, you're making everything too racial.

00:00:46.000 I had used a racial epithet involving Asians.

00:00:48.000 I meant it sarcastically, but I was annoyed that Ryan rolls up the sleeves on his extra-large t-shirts.

00:00:56.000 So they shut our internet down.

00:00:58.000 We said, we'll never use any bad language again.

00:01:01.000 And we also said, fuck fossil fuels and go Biden.

00:01:06.000 And they said, okay, if you renounce everything you've ever said and you support the Democrat Party, we'll turn your internet back on.

00:01:15.000 And we did.

00:01:17.000 So this is now, we're going the way of the lefty.

00:01:20.000 So there's going to be a lot of boring circular arguments about how racist everything is, but it's that or nothing.

00:01:27.000 I pray for Ukraine.

00:01:28.000 Pray for Ukraine.

00:01:29.000 I support you.

00:01:37.000 It's weird that the internet went out and the none of the power went out.

00:01:40.000 Yeah, it is.

00:01:40.000 It's very strange.

00:01:43.000 I think it was a glitch.

00:01:45.000 A glitch in the system.

00:01:46.000 So anyway, to get back to what I was saying, there's a bunch of videos floating around of Jon Stewart trying to become John Wokeman.

00:01:54.000 And one of them is Andrew Sullivan, some fat cunt who keeps talking about white supremacy in the system. 0.87

00:02:01.000 There you go.

00:02:02.000 And then some other guy named Chip who's also like, we need, us white people, need to fix the problem and not ask black people to blah, blah, blah. 0.97

00:02:10.000 I hate that shit.

00:02:11.000 It's so boring.

00:02:12.000 But it's just weird how they all talk to Andrew Sullivan like he's an idiot.

00:02:16.000 I think he's a gay centerist.

00:02:19.000 And all he's saying is, you know, I'm an immigrant.

00:02:21.000 I came here from Britain.

00:02:23.000 I think he shat on me many years ago and said, I believe it's about vice.

00:02:28.000 And he was calling me racist back in the 90s or maybe the early aughts.

00:02:32.000 And he said, oh, those crosses burning on our lawn.

00:02:35.000 We were just being ironic.

00:02:38.000 So he's been one of them for a long time.

00:02:40.000 But anyway, he was just saying, I don't really find it that racist here.

00:02:44.000 I mean, maybe it was, but as far as today goes, stop complaining.

00:02:49.000 And that was like, that's the new David Duke.

00:02:54.000 If buying and owning a suit, one suit only, what color?

00:02:57.000 I like black.

00:02:58.000 I got a lot of shit for saying black, though.

00:03:00.000 People go, what?

00:03:01.000 For funerals?

00:03:02.000 It's a good look.

00:03:03.000 It's like reservoir dogs.

00:03:05.000 But if you're not ready to handle that kind of a commitment with a black suit and a black tie, which I think looks great, it's much safer to go with dark gray.

00:03:14.000 But I think that's a pussy move. 1.00

00:03:16.000 Ryan, put the camera on yourself while you set stuff up.

00:03:20.000 Explain the calls.

00:03:22.000 Actually, why don't you also start the interstitial for mailbag?

00:03:25.000 I'm going to turn off that annoying alarm.

00:03:27.000 Got it.

00:03:28.000 Mailbag time.

00:03:32.000 Ryan, shut up, you don't have a dead.

00:03:36.000 Let's turn our fries together.

00:03:39.000 It's mailbag.

00:03:42.000 Let me touch it.

00:03:44.000 And we're back.

00:03:46.000 Okay, so if you guys don't know about the super chats, if you're new here, you go to the live show on a browser, and then under it is a little donate to read a live message on there.

00:04:01.000 So there's that.

00:04:02.000 You can go ahead and you could do that.

00:04:04.000 You could also call in at the number below.

00:04:06.000 For those of you just listening, it's 718-400-6959.

00:04:11.000 Again, that's 718-400-6959.

00:04:16.000 Okay, first letter.

00:04:20.000 This bitch is a nine in my book, and if you disagree, you're a fag and a racist. 1.00

00:04:26.000 But I'm curious, what would you give her?

00:04:30.000 This is a pretty interesting challenge because it brings up all kinds of problems.

00:04:36.000 Like, obviously, I'd love the idea of those giant tits in my face, like now. 1.00

00:04:42.000 But when you're judging a girl, aren't you also thinking about a potential mate?

00:04:49.000 What's with my eyes just peering out over this little Chiron? 1.00

00:04:54.000 And if you are judging for a potential mate, those things are a real pain in the ass to lug around.

00:05:02.000 You know what I mean?

00:05:04.000 Like, you're kind of marrying a freak.

00:05:08.000 So in that sense, that would lower her score like crazy.

00:05:12.000 Like, think of you and her and your kid going to Disneyland with those big stupid tits flopping around. 1.00

00:05:20.000 Obviously, you want them for sex, but...

00:05:24.000 And then her face, obviously, is exquisite.

00:05:26.000 I don't know.

00:05:27.000 Let's watch her move around a little bit. 0.99

00:05:29.000 This isn't a video, unfortunately.

00:05:30.000 Let's see.

00:05:31.000 Did he link?

00:05:32.000 He linked the video, you absolute retard. 1.00

00:05:34.000 Okay.

00:05:36.000 Like, what I'm noticing when I have my computer is things are up and ready to go within seconds.

00:05:46.000 Okay, we don't need to see this.

00:05:57.000 And they feeling good, like it's time to get out.

00:06:00.000 So, now that the pandemic is kind of tapering off, people going back outside, getting away from the people who she has dead batteries in her smoke alarm, which is a trait of a lot of certain types of people.

00:06:14.000 Stuck with in the house dorm.

00:06:15.000 Is it beeping?

00:06:16.000 Yeah, it went.

00:06:19.000 I think there's going to be a surge of outings and parties and brunches and all that.

00:06:27.000 Brunches. 1.00

00:06:30.000 Doesn't that sound exciting?

00:06:31.000 A brunch.

00:06:32.000 Yeah.

00:06:32.000 I had the dumbest fight at the bar today.

00:06:35.000 This guy's like, he goes, Tony Soprano wasn't killed.

00:06:40.000 And I go, yeah, he was killed.

00:06:42.000 I go, he goes, oh, David Chase said what it was.

00:06:46.000 And I go, yeah.

00:06:47.000 But we always knew he was killed.

00:06:48.000 The show was from Tony's perspective, and it went to black because he had his head blown off.

00:06:53.000 And we know it wasn't AJ and Meadow because we saw them in a car commercial last week.

00:06:57.000 Oh, yeah.

00:06:57.000 And he goes, okay, blah, blah, blah.

00:06:59.000 Yeah, I'm reading here.

00:07:01.000 And they were at a dinner.

00:07:04.000 And then they, oh, sorry, they were at a diner.

00:07:07.000 They weren't at dinner.

00:07:08.000 And I go, well, there was both.

00:07:11.000 And he goes, no, no, it was a diner.

00:07:13.000 And I go, I know it was at a diner, but you can't have dinner at a diner?

00:07:17.000 And he goes, no, you have like a brunch.

00:07:18.000 Like, it's like 11 to 1.

00:07:20.000 What?

00:07:20.000 I go, that's not true.

00:07:22.000 That's probably when most of us go to a diner, but plenty of people have dinner at a diner.

00:07:28.000 And it was dark out.

00:07:29.000 And it was dark out.

00:07:30.000 And he goes, no, it wasn't.

00:07:31.000 Yes, it was.

00:07:32.000 And I go, now you're just saying that because you want to win this dumb dinner-diner argument.

00:07:36.000 And he goes, look, I pronounced it dinner.

00:07:38.000 I didn't see there was one N. I corrected myself and said diner.

00:07:42.000 And I'm like, well, now you're going back to the beginning and pretend this discussion never happened.

00:07:46.000 But I was there, and it was about 40 seconds ago.

00:07:49.000 Yeah, David Chase does not need to talk about this for me to understand what just happened.

00:07:53.000 This is not a mystery.

00:07:55.000 And then he read the whole article to himself, and he fucking goes, yeah, I think he did kill.

00:07:59.000 He was dead.

00:08:01.000 The guy's a cokehead, and he's so fucking loud. 1.00

00:08:06.000 That kind of reminds me of, I actually watched one of the new Change My Minds with Crowder.

00:08:12.000 And there's this one guy, he's a Rolling Stone journalist, and he's talking about the amount of people that are transgender or something like that.

00:08:17.000 Oh, that's a famous piece going on.

00:08:19.000 He looks pretty good.

00:08:20.000 He's got like a cool hat on and an Army surplus jacket.

00:08:23.000 Yes.

00:08:23.000 And he makes a total idiot of himself by doing that thing liberals do.

00:08:27.000 They do it with abortion. 1.00

00:08:28.000 Like, what if the dad raped her?

00:08:29.000 Can she have an abortion then? 1.00

00:08:31.000 And you're like, how many times does that fucking happen?

00:08:34.000 And his case was like, what about the people that are, what's the word?

00:08:37.000 Intersex. 0.94

00:08:38.000 Intersex. 0.94

00:08:39.000 Like a chick born with a dick that's, I mean, a clit that's so big it's a dick. 1.00

00:08:44.000 Like China, the wrestler.

00:08:46.000 China.

00:08:47.000 Or allegedly Jamie Lee Curtis.

00:08:50.000 I don't know.

00:08:50.000 Are we going to sit here and make policy for three people?

00:08:53.000 And then he says it's actually 1.8% of the population.

00:08:57.000 Because he had it ready on his phone.

00:08:59.000 And it was a Crowder looked it up later and it's like 0.00000000000001.

00:09:04.000 Yeah, the one that I saw, he...

00:09:07.000 Obviously.

00:09:07.000 When was the last time you met a dude?

00:09:08.000 He's like, you know that chick I fucked the other day? 0.99

00:09:10.000 Yeah, yeah.

00:09:11.000 Clit's a dick. 1.00

00:09:13.000 What?

00:09:14.000 Yeah, she has a vagina, but where the clit is, it's like a little kid's penis. 1.00

00:09:18.000 Oh, that's fucking gross.

00:09:20.000 Did it get hard?

00:09:21.000 Sort of.

00:09:23.000 Oh, well, I've heard of that before.

00:09:27.000 Yeah, why even tell me?

00:09:28.000 If your friend told you that, you'd faint.

00:09:31.000 You'd be like, oh, my Lord in heaven.

00:09:36.000 I would faint.

00:09:37.000 First of all, I wouldn't believe you.

00:09:38.000 First of all, I would go, oh, shit.

00:09:43.000 What the fuck is that?

00:09:44.000 Did you not know I had that?

00:09:46.000 Nah, nigga, what the fuck? 1.00

00:09:47.000 It's saved for neutron bombs.

00:09:49.000 I have what?

00:09:51.000 Tattooed on the inside of my mouth.

00:09:53.000 Since Quinn.

00:09:55.000 1996.

00:09:57.000 You're kidding.

00:09:57.000 I heard, you know, somebody told me that those go away in like five years.

00:10:00.000 Not mine.

00:10:01.000 What the fuck?

00:10:01.000 I think he went real deep.

00:10:03.000 This is so weird.

00:10:05.000 I've known you for four or five years, more, six?

00:10:08.000 Too long.

00:10:10.000 And when a guy has a lip tattoo and you didn't know about it, it's weird to me.

00:10:14.000 Well, I obviously forget about it.

00:10:16.000 Wait, I want one.

00:10:17.000 Okay, let's get you one.

00:10:18.000 Anyway.

00:10:19.000 What should mine say?

00:10:20.000 Never mind.

00:10:21.000 I'll think of it on my own.

00:10:23.000 Yeah.

00:10:23.000 You're thinking of something rude.

00:10:25.000 Come.

00:10:25.000 I knew it.

00:10:27.000 But first I would go, what?

00:10:32.000 Wait, what?

00:10:34.000 Fuck you.

00:10:35.000 Fuck you.

00:10:35.000 Then there'd be a whole ritual of swear on your mother's grave.

00:10:38.000 Swear you want your children to have cancer if you're lying.

00:10:41.000 Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

00:10:42.000 All of that stuff.

00:10:44.000 We get through all that.

00:10:45.000 And then when I finally, finally believed you, or, you know, you just wished your mom had cancer just to get this over on me.

00:10:53.000 I guess I would finally believe you.

00:10:55.000 And then you could start saying it.

00:10:56.000 And I wouldn't.

00:10:57.000 Oh, the night's over, by the way.

00:10:59.000 Like, I got to drive home.

00:11:01.000 Yeah, I got to buy pearls to clutch them.

00:11:03.000 Yeah.

00:11:03.000 Because, whoa, dude.

00:11:05.000 My wife's, I'm going to go home.

00:11:06.000 My wife's going to be like, why is the light on? 0.99

00:11:09.000 And I'll just be like, I can either lie here awake all night staring at the ceiling or I got to tell you something because you're going to fucking shit your pants.

00:11:18.000 So anyway, all of that is to say it's not a thing.

00:11:21.000 So we don't need to start coming up with massive sport policies based on China and Jamie Lee Curtis.

00:11:30.000 My favorite moment is he brings it up on his phone.

00:11:33.000 He won't let him.

00:11:34.000 He's all ready to go.

00:11:35.000 Yeah, yeah.

00:11:35.000 And he was like, okay.

00:11:36.000 He's like, the number is 0.018.

00:11:39.000 And then he's like, what's the number?

00:11:41.000 He's like, well, it's 0.08.

00:11:44.000 He's like, no, no, no.

00:11:45.000 What's it say?

00:11:46.000 He's like, 0.018 something.

00:11:51.000 Like, he just tries to just tell him he's right.02.

00:11:54.000 The guy's literally right.

00:11:56.000 It's eight.

00:11:58.000 Encourage anyone that's.

00:12:00.000 You just brought up PubMed and it didn't reflect what you just reflected on.

00:12:03.000 So App Shag. 0.97

00:12:07.000 0.0018%, almost 100 times lower than Fausto Sterling, estimate of 1.7%.

00:12:14.000 So it is because they're insistent.

00:12:18.000 And then he says, I'm going to check PubMed.

00:12:20.000 He's like, you just checked PubMed.

00:12:22.000 0.0018.

00:12:24.000 He's like, but there's still people.

00:12:26.000 He's like, yeah.

00:12:26.000 I know there's a lot of Americans in this country, 331 million.

00:12:30.000 But can we just all agree to ignore anything that is as low as 0.0018?

00:12:37.000 I don't care what it is.

00:12:39.000 I mean, I'm sorry, but school shootings, as far as the number of kids in school and how many have died in the past, say, 10 years, I bet we're in the 0.0018.

00:12:50.000 I know Europeans love to say, oh, you with your guns.

00:12:55.000 You're always your school shootings.

00:12:57.000 You may have a problem with us here in Europe, But at least we're not having our children slaughtered every day when they're just trying to read a book in school.

00:13:07.000 Yes, school shootings are horrific, but alarmingly rare, I'm afraid.

00:13:14.000 You sure hear a lot about them, but as far as the hundreds of millions of people here, it's pretty fucking rare.

00:13:20.000 And another thing I was thinking about with guns the other day, everywhere in the world we have criminals murdering people with guns.

00:13:30.000 Everywhere in the entire world.

00:13:33.000 And most of these people don't have any kind of gun regulation.

00:13:37.000 We have tons of gun regulation and we have the exact same scenario.

00:13:43.000 Britain's got stabbings.

00:13:44.000 I'd rather get shot than stabbed.

00:13:46.000 Maybe I'm just retarding.

00:13:48.000 Australia has plenty of gun crime.

00:13:50.000 And Britain, they got their gun crime.

00:13:55.000 They also have a severe rape epidemic going on.

00:13:59.000 Do you really want to compare us to Britain?

00:14:02.000 But like, I'm talking about the darkest parts of Brazil, the Congo, fucking Malaysia. 1.00

00:14:07.000 There's gangsters murdering people with guns.

00:14:11.000 But yeah, it's our gun policy that's causing the problem.

00:14:14.000 Fuck, did you see that horrific video of this 12-year-old girl playing with a revolver that has a crazy clip on it that has like 900 bullets? 1.00

00:14:25.000 It's round, like an old Tommy gun.

00:14:27.000 Right, right.

00:14:28.000 And she's playing with it, and she's like, ooh, I'm going to shoot you. 0.98

00:14:33.000 Shoots him.

00:14:34.000 And I think the kickback makes her shoot herself. 0.97

00:14:38.000 Whoa.

00:14:39.000 13-year-old and a 12-year-old.

00:14:42.000 That's a video I will not be watching.

00:14:45.000 It's pretty harsh.

00:14:46.000 And then the video keeps going because it's Facebook Live.

00:14:48.000 And you see everyone else trying to get into the bathroom.

00:14:51.000 And you see them open the door and they look down.

00:14:53.000 They must see a 12-year-old and a 13-year-old in a sea of blood.

00:14:56.000 You know how much heads bleed.

00:14:58.000 Just in a sea of blood, not moving at all.

00:15:02.000 I would still like try to revive them.

00:15:04.000 Yeah, yeah.

00:15:05.000 Remember that other video of the girl doing the exact same thing and they're all like 20?

00:15:10.000 And she's like, yo, yo. 0.57

00:15:12.000 And then exact same thing.

00:15:14.000 He just goes, and blood is just pouring.

00:15:18.000 They both run out of the car.

00:15:20.000 He's alive now.

00:15:21.000 Wow.

00:15:22.000 But he's like in a chair.

00:15:24.000 And he says, he just goes like, I think one of his eyes is sealed shut.

00:15:30.000 He's like, don't play with guns.

00:15:34.000 We need more gun regulation.

00:15:37.000 That'll stop that happening.

00:15:39.000 Yeah, if those, that's the video I was just talking about.

00:15:42.000 And there he is.

00:15:43.000 One of his eyes are closed.

00:15:44.000 If only there was gun regulation, they wouldn't have been fucking around in their car with their drugs and their other and their bombs.

00:15:51.000 Look at this poll.

00:16:02.000 She turned that guy into a zombie. 1.00

00:16:05.000 Their drugs and their bombs. 0.78

00:16:10.000 80% of people would rather be shot than stabbed according to this poll.

00:16:15.000 I think I'm in the...

00:16:16.000 There's a lot of caveats there.

00:16:17.000 Yeah, I know.

00:16:18.000 In the eye?

00:16:19.000 What are we doing here?

00:16:21.000 This is truth.

00:16:22.000 Would you rather survive a gunshot or a stabbing, I guess?

00:16:25.000 Well.

00:16:26.000 Gunshot.

00:16:26.000 I'll tell you what, I want to survive.

00:16:28.000 There was a girl that was being raped on the train by a gang of thugs.

00:16:34.000 I don't care what race they are, despite what you think I want. 0.98

00:16:37.000 And I said, guys, this isn't happening tonight.

00:16:42.000 Not on my watch.

00:16:44.000 Leave her alone. 1.00

00:16:44.000 No, that's way. 1.00

00:16:45.000 I started out kidding, and then I tried to get serious, and I was kidding again.

00:16:48.000 Stop, stop, stop.

00:16:49.000 Let me rewind, rewind.

00:16:51.000 Hey! 0.99

00:16:52.000 Leave her alone. 1.00

00:16:54.000 What the fuck you going to do, old man?

00:16:57.000 He's a redneck, okay? 0.98

00:16:58.000 Racist.

00:17:02.000 Well, you can stick around and find out.

00:17:05.000 Or you can leave her the fuck alone and get out of here. 0.99

00:17:07.000 Fuck you, motherfucker. 0.99

00:17:08.000 Big fight.

00:17:10.000 I'm winning.

00:17:11.000 But get me.

00:17:12.000 Uh-oh.

00:17:13.000 And then I got cut.

00:17:16.000 Right across my eye.

00:17:17.000 This eye's garbage.

00:17:18.000 Oh, hell yeah.

00:17:19.000 Guess what I got to do now?

00:17:21.000 Wear a fucking eye patch.

00:17:24.000 An eye patch with a scar?

00:17:27.000 Eye patch?

00:17:28.000 Scar.

00:17:29.000 That's sick.

00:17:31.000 So the red-blooded American male does not secretly wish for that every night that he gets his eyes slit into.

00:17:38.000 For real, though, it's a look.

00:17:40.000 It's a look, man.

00:17:41.000 I would give up the glasses.

00:17:43.000 I'd blow that guy right now.

00:17:45.000 Yep.

00:17:46.000 And he's a cartoon.

00:17:47.000 Yeah.

00:17:49.000 Oh, my God.

00:17:49.000 Snake Plissken?

00:17:51.000 Drool.

00:17:52.000 Drool.

00:17:53.000 I know a guy at the bar.

00:17:55.000 Not so much.

00:17:56.000 He's not a great-looking guy.

00:17:58.000 He works at the post office.

00:17:59.000 He's dead in one eye.

00:18:00.000 And I'm like, what the fuck don't you have an eye patch?

00:18:03.000 You got to buy him one.

00:18:04.000 And he goes, I don't, Gavin.

00:18:05.000 He always says Gavin all the time.

00:18:07.000 He goes, Gavin, I don't want people knowing that I've got a vulnerability.

00:18:11.000 Now you got one up on me.

00:18:12.000 I don't want you knowing.

00:18:13.000 I'm blind in one eye.

00:18:15.000 I'm like, why?

00:18:15.000 Are we having a fork fight later on?

00:18:19.000 Oh, I know you can't see me coming up on this side.

00:18:24.000 Great look.

00:18:25.000 Is there one guy who's not attractive who has an eye?

00:18:28.000 I mean, this guy's kind of pushing it, but I mean, imagine him with strings.

00:18:32.000 Yeah, that's true.

00:18:33.000 This guy.

00:18:35.000 It would be kind of weird, though, in the suburbs, like picking your kid up from T-ball.

00:18:43.000 You're just like, hello.

00:18:46.000 I'm sorry I'm late.

00:18:48.000 I hate pirate jokes.

00:18:50.000 I hate anything pirate.

00:18:51.000 It was a little hack.

00:18:52.000 Pirate Day.

00:18:53.000 Remember that in that Dodgeball movie?

00:18:56.000 Pirates are so fucking corny, man.

00:18:58.000 We got some calls.

00:19:00.000 Arms back on.

00:19:01.000 I could fix it.

00:19:03.000 Congratulations, guys.

00:19:06.000 It's a healthy baby.

00:19:07.000 8 pounds, 7 ounces.

00:19:08.000 BBLI would like to welcome the world, our brother Matt's first child, Natalie Lynn, after much trying.

00:19:14.000 Born this Saturday, March 26th.

00:19:15.000 A nice, healthy 8 pounds, 7 inches.

00:19:18.000 Congratulations, brother Matt.

00:19:22.000 You got a rocky seven weeks coming up, buddy.

00:19:25.000 Right, Ryan?

00:19:26.000 Get your sleeping while you can because they're crying.

00:19:30.000 But after that seven weeks, it's all gravy.

00:19:32.000 It's Evan.

00:19:36.000 We read that for Joe Biggs' prayers.

00:19:39.000 Government's from Byzantium Globalist.

00:19:40.000 Fucking true.

00:19:41.000 Yep.

00:19:41.000 Great time to be an anarchist.

00:19:43.000 Too bad the anarchists have been taken over by the government.

00:19:46.000 The government has ruined everything, including the anarchist movement.

00:19:50.000 And now you have Antifa going to anti-mandate rallies and going, get your fucking vax.

00:19:56.000 Put a mask on.

00:19:58.000 The government said I'm an anarchist.

00:20:01.000 Grandmaster Gav Rye Guy and Rawdog Maddie, who unfortunately is probably just watching this from home at best.

00:20:07.000 You guys are all absolute legends.

00:20:08.000 You know what's funny about Maddie too? 0.95

00:20:10.000 I go, hey man, if you die, you owe me $100 from that thing.

00:20:16.000 Can you leave it like under a rock or something before you go to the hospital?

00:20:19.000 And he's like, yeah, I'll leave it.

00:20:21.000 And then he told me a hiding spot.

00:20:23.000 I'm like, is it possible he thinks I'm serious?

00:20:26.000 That would be the saddest $100 to claim.

00:20:28.000 Like he leaves behind a thing with a little joke, be like, told you I get it.

00:20:31.000 And you'd be like, it'd be so sad.

00:20:34.000 Hey, Buster.

00:20:36.000 What do you buy with that?

00:20:38.000 PJs? 0.98

00:20:39.000 Fuck.

00:20:40.000 Lots of flowers.

00:20:42.000 No, that's gay.

00:20:43.000 For him.

00:20:44.000 Oh, then it's not gay. 0.82

00:20:48.000 I live in South Florida, been down here 10 years.

00:20:50.000 For God's sake, it is a nursing home here on the plantation.

00:20:54.000 I mind as well be dead at the age of 27.

00:20:57.000 Thank you all for keeping me alive.

00:21:00.000 Yeah, Florida's got a lot of great shit about it, but it's also got a lot of fucking old folks. 1.00

00:21:06.000 They're almost like, it's almost like living in an Amish community or in a black part of town or in some other place where there's this very big group that clearly dominates the area and you're not one of them.

00:21:21.000 It's weird when you see young people and like when I visit my parents at New Smarna Beach, I see these young people out, you know, working the tables and stuff and having fun with each other.

00:21:31.000 And they're in an area that's 90% geriatric.

00:21:36.000 This guy says, moved from France to Tampa about a year ago, and yes, Florida is boring.

00:21:40.000 At first, it looks like this.

00:21:42.000 Not too bad, right?

00:21:43.000 Then you realize the weather does not change year-round.

00:21:46.000 It's something you appreciate and you miss.

00:21:49.000 Blah, blah.

00:21:51.000 Personally, I think I'd like to live in Florida.

00:21:53.000 I know a lot of cool people there, but maybe they're right, though.

00:21:55.000 The flatness.

00:21:56.000 Like, New York is, I like the geography.

00:22:01.000 Let's get back to this black chick. 1.00

00:22:03.000 I'm going to take the boobs as not an asset, believe it or not. 0.80

00:22:07.000 I don't want those tits that big in my life. 1.00

00:22:10.000 Like, they're just, they're all consuming.

00:22:13.000 So obviously the face is like a nine, but I'm going to, and I'm going to have fun the first week with the tits, but then when we're like at Disneyland with the kids, I'm going to be kind of annoyed.

00:22:23.000 So I'm going to give her.

00:22:26.000 You're not going to like this.

00:22:28.000 I'm going to give her a 7.8.

00:22:30.000 Wow.

00:22:31.000 What about you, Ryan?

00:22:32.000 That's kind of high, right?

00:22:33.000 But...

00:22:34.000 No, it's not.

00:22:35.000 Look at her.

00:22:35.000 Let's see.

00:22:37.000 She does have a very pretty face.

00:22:38.000 You're right.

00:22:40.000 And she got that good hair. 0.97

00:22:43.000 Here's the full body wig.

00:22:46.000 There's not too much issue there, right?

00:22:49.000 She's pretty chubs. 1.00

00:22:50.000 All right.

00:22:51.000 Next letter.

00:22:54.000 Gavin Rye guy, I'm sick of Autistic Fans sending you sprinkles. 1.00

00:22:58.000 This guy is ancient secret, but he actually has talent.

00:23:02.000 Actual sprinkles.

00:23:03.000 This won't be sprinkles, I guarantee.

00:23:06.000 But it is.

00:23:07.000 We'll hit the gong if it's really an ancient Chinese. 1.00

00:23:12.000 Why isn't the audio?

00:23:17.000 Ain't I famous?

00:23:19.000 Hey.

00:23:20.000 I ain't got...

00:23:21.000 Oh, and look at all these condom, I got hella condemn.

00:23:25.000 Hey, man.

00:23:26.000 Who got condom on the day? 0.90

00:23:28.000 I got two, four, fifty, five, fifteen condom in here.

00:23:31.000 Put that in the dad, boy.

00:23:34.000 Put that boy with the chip and the gun.

00:23:37.000 We don't drill on the gun.

00:23:39.000 Fuck you, asshole. 0.99

00:23:41.000 Stop wasting our time.

00:23:43.000 Fuck, I hate you.

00:23:44.000 I'm suspicious of drugs, by the way.

00:23:46.000 Ugh.

00:23:47.000 When you're feeling good on a little on a perk buzz and you could disassociate from yourself and do impressions real good.

00:23:53.000 I go through all of the emails before we do this show, but then I get new ones that have started since we went live.

00:23:59.000 So sometimes I get greedy and I jump on those.

00:24:02.000 Then I end up with some actual actual spinkers.

00:24:07.000 This is a $100 thingy.

00:24:11.000 Tell TG to read his email and respond to Plopless.

00:24:18.000 I can sponsor this damn show.

00:24:19.000 Also, what is your solution to relatives always showing up to your house?

00:24:22.000 We have a 15-month-old and they want to see the kid.

00:24:25.000 I get that, but I'm sick of it.

00:24:26.000 And ban them all until further notice they were showing.

00:24:28.000 Let me see.

00:24:29.000 I could find out the full respond topless?

00:24:36.000 Don't do that.

00:24:37.000 Well, tell TG, who's TG?

00:24:40.000 The Gav.

00:24:41.000 Oh, I think.

00:24:42.000 Fucking annoying.

00:24:45.000 To read his email and respond.

00:24:46.000 I can sponsor this damn show.

00:24:48.000 What does that mean?

00:24:49.000 Let me see.

00:24:50.000 TPC.

00:24:50.000 He wants to be a sponsor, so you probably got a company here.

00:24:54.000 Here, I got the full message.

00:24:55.000 Here we go.

00:24:57.000 I'm so annoyed right now.

00:24:59.000 You don't like that?

00:24:59.000 That actual sprinkles really piss me off.

00:25:01.000 Oh, that is.

00:25:02.000 That's ruining everything else.

00:25:05.000 And respond, also, what is your solution?

00:25:07.000 Blah, blah, blah.

00:25:08.000 I'm sick of it.

00:25:09.000 I banned them off.

00:25:09.000 They're there showing up between five to seven times last year.

00:25:12.000 Now, yeah, you're an asshole, dude.

00:25:15.000 More visitors, the better.

00:25:17.000 Get the baby off your hands. 0.99

00:25:19.000 You're a dick, so that's two dicks in a row.

00:25:21.000 Number three.

00:25:24.000 First of all, this is from Australia.

00:25:27.000 I'd like to say thank you for helping me realize that marriage and children is the best and most meaningful thing to aim for.

00:25:31.000 Just over a month ago, I married my fiancé.

00:25:33.000 We plan to knock her up this year. 1.00

00:25:34.000 I'm 29.

00:25:35.000 She's 26.

00:25:38.000 One child is for losers.

00:25:40.000 Two children is for fags. 0.99

00:25:44.000 Three is the bare minimum.

00:25:46.000 It's hard to get three or more when you start as late as I did.

00:25:51.000 So actually, you're not much earlier than me, Ryan.

00:25:54.000 I was 36.

00:25:55.000 30.

00:25:56.000 Yeah, I was 36 when I had my first kid.

00:25:58.000 You're what, 31?

00:25:59.000 Yep.

00:26:00.000 I was always afraid of, yeah, like being too late.

00:26:04.000 But now number two is like, now I'm afraid of number two being too late.

00:26:09.000 But you know, it'd be fun, older brother.

00:26:10.000 We were just thinking about this.

00:26:12.000 If she's like two years older than a little brother, so she's like able to speak and express herself, and then you got a little baby, like, you know, being little, like, if it's a boy, two years is the max gap.

00:26:23.000 More than two years, they're just like roommates.

00:26:26.000 Anyway, our wedding was an absolute jam with GOML references peppered throughout.

00:26:31.000 My suit was made by Nita Fashions.

00:26:33.000 The recessional song was The Bonnie.

00:26:37.000 You can beld a bonnie. 0.97

00:26:39.000 And my best man finished off his speech by hoping we saw like the bird which is the bald eagle.

00:26:44.000 Oh, that's fantastic.

00:26:46.000 My wife is an incredibly strong woman. 0.79

00:26:49.000 She is 6'4 and weighs 460 pounds.

00:26:53.000 She won the top bodybuilding award for Malaysia because she lifted what is considered their heaviest, what they call their heaviest human stone.

00:27:02.000 I guess over there, human stones are stones that a human could lift.

00:27:06.000 Obviously, their biggest stone is being much bigger.

00:27:09.000 Her feet are size 14, and she has to buy gloves online from the NBA because her fingers are over six inches in diameter.

00:27:21.000 Wow.

00:27:22.000 I am clearly a fag if I'm attracted to a woman this masculine. 0.65

00:27:26.000 So fuck you. 0.68

00:27:27.000 No, I wasn't reading the letter.

00:27:29.000 She's an incredibly strong woman.

00:27:30.000 She's Malaysian and her family's Muslim.

00:27:32.000 In her teen years, she already knew that she wanted nothing to do with that shit.

00:27:36.000 When we told her parents, she's not a bodybuilder.

00:27:39.000 That was a joke, people.

00:27:42.000 All he said was strong woman, and then I went off on a joke bit.

00:27:46.000 When we told her, I have to explain these things because Ryan doesn't get these things.

00:27:50.000 I do represent a lot of people.

00:27:51.000 She's strong.

00:27:53.000 I represent a lot of people that might not get that.

00:27:56.000 When we told her parents we were engaged, they said to convert to Islam, blah, blah, blah.

00:27:59.000 And they say we ignored their demands and got married anyway.

00:28:01.000 Her mom still messages us saying, please do it for us so we can move past this and be a family.

00:28:06.000 I used to tell her not to ignore the messages and take the higher road.

00:28:09.000 But since they're still doing it after the wedding, which they didn't attend, fucking Jesus.

00:28:16.000 Muslims.

00:28:18.000 I'm over this shit.

00:28:19.000 Next time I see my mother, I'm likely to lose my shit at her. 1.00

00:28:21.000 What would you do?

00:28:22.000 Continue to ignore it, continue to be pleasant.

00:28:24.000 I want to fuck with my heels on.

00:28:25.000 Here's my advice, sir.

00:28:26.000 And you've sent this letter a few times, but whatever.

00:28:29.000 I guess it worked.

00:28:32.000 I would lie.

00:28:34.000 Obviously, you're dealing with cave people, right?

00:28:37.000 These are not human beings.

00:28:38.000 If they're not coming to your wedding because she didn't convert, then they're archaic cave fuckheads. 1.00

00:28:45.000 And they're Muslims.

00:28:46.000 I mean, who cares about their feelings?

00:28:49.000 I would just go, mom, great news.

00:28:52.000 I don't know why I'm assuming this Malaysian woman has an Australian accent.

00:28:55.000 We converted.

00:28:56.000 Oh, thank you.

00:28:57.000 The blessings are.

00:28:58.000 Praises due to Allah.

00:29:00.000 Now, the mother's Indian somehow. 1.00

00:29:02.000 I have limited accents, okay?

00:29:05.000 And then say, yeah, oh, who is your Imam?

00:29:08.000 And what was the mosque's... 0.84

00:29:10.000 You know, she maybe asked some skill testing questions and go, oh, I think his name was Eddie and the mosque is like the Al-Shabaz.

00:29:16.000 I kind of forget.

00:29:19.000 Just lie.

00:29:20.000 You want the parent.

00:29:21.000 The grandparents should be part of the child's life.

00:29:23.000 As long as they're not going to fucking honor kill her for shaming the family. 0.97

00:29:28.000 But if they're not that extreme, I would just say, yeah, yeah, we did that.

00:29:31.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:29:32.000 Oh, we're Muslims.

00:29:33.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:29:35.000 Not drink around them and make it work.

00:29:37.000 And if they catch you, I don't know, continue to deny, deny, deny.

00:29:42.000 That would be my advice.

00:29:43.000 Like, you're talking about them like they're equals.

00:29:47.000 I wouldn't lie to Ryan about being Muslim because I see him as, this hurts me to say, but I see him as an equal.

00:29:55.000 But if he was like, what are you doing?

00:29:57.000 You need to convert to the, I just, yeah, I would tell that person to fuck off. 1.00

00:30:02.000 But if it was like a human rodent that was like, I'm still little.

00:30:06.000 I can only fly my little plane around your studio if you say, Allah, Allah.

00:30:11.000 Okay, Allah, Allah.

00:30:14.000 That's what I do.

00:30:15.000 There's no skin off your bum.

00:30:16.000 And the kids get to see their grandparents.

00:30:18.000 Like, don't let her gay rules fuck up your child's future. 1.00

00:30:24.000 Would you rather take a punch to the face by Ryan once a week?

00:30:27.000 He's probably going to get better at it.

00:30:28.000 You know, he's going to see where, like, he gets the most.

00:30:31.000 That's if I wanted to hurt you.

00:30:32.000 I mean, I probably wouldn't be so amped to do this.

00:30:35.000 Or take a punch to the body by Mike Tyson once a month.

00:30:38.000 You know, it'd be funny most days I would just do it just like this just to get over it.

00:30:41.000 No, no, no.

00:30:42.000 You get like you get stabbed.

00:30:44.000 Obviously, the people who've set this up have thought about you not punching me hard, dumbass.

00:30:48.000 Damn it.

00:30:53.000 Yeah, that Mike Tysoner, that could do some real damage.

00:30:58.000 But then, so could a Ryan punch.

00:31:01.000 It's not like...

00:31:02.000 Was it every day with the Ryan punch?

00:31:06.000 Let's see.

00:31:08.000 Once a week.

00:31:10.000 Once a month.

00:31:11.000 I'm going to go...

00:31:13.000 You can get your eye patch dream fulfilled.

00:31:15.000 No, he's punching my body.

00:31:16.000 No, but from you?

00:31:18.000 Yeah, yeah.

00:31:19.000 That's a really good one, I got to say.

00:31:21.000 But I'm going to go with the Tyson body, and I'm just going to devote every morning to working on my core and strengthening my core so he doesn't break my ribs.

00:31:32.000 He's getting older, too.

00:31:35.000 Yeah, you're right.

00:31:35.000 And plus, if you're braced for it, I think you might be able to survive.

00:31:41.000 But like, once a week, a punch.

00:31:43.000 I'm going to start having my orbital socket or whatever smashed in and my retina separated from my eye and all kinds of dental damage.

00:31:54.000 And ugh.

00:31:56.000 It could get really damaging.

00:31:58.000 Yeah.

00:31:59.000 You might piss blood and shit.

00:32:00.000 Yeah, no, fuck that.

00:32:01.000 I'd take a face punch.

00:32:03.000 Well, Ryan, I just said I'm going with the Tyson thing.

00:32:08.000 And you said, yeah, I agree with you.

00:32:09.000 I'm going with the face punch too.

00:32:11.000 No, but you said you were like, either you're going to get a lot of body damage and stuff.

00:32:14.000 And I was like, yeah, that's...

00:32:15.000 No, I was discussing my face.

00:32:18.000 My retina, orbital, my teeth.

00:32:21.000 These are all in.

00:32:21.000 I don't know where you store your teeth.

00:32:23.000 Mine are in my head.

00:32:24.000 Really?

00:32:25.000 That's weird.

00:32:26.000 Yeah.

00:32:29.000 This guy sent us a picture, Remember When.

00:32:33.000 Okay.

00:32:33.000 Remember when?

00:32:34.000 It's the lowest form of conversation?

00:32:37.000 I didn't know that.

00:32:38.000 Let's see.

00:32:39.000 Remember when.

00:32:40.000 It's just a picture.

00:32:41.000 It said a video.

00:32:43.000 Oh, there we go.

00:32:46.000 307, you're on the line.

00:32:48.000 Hey, how's it going, guys?

00:32:49.000 What's going on?

00:32:52.000 Hey, I was the first caller.

00:32:54.000 I was calling back to demand my free shit.

00:32:56.000 Yeah, it's the first two polished.

00:32:57.000 Oh, for free.

00:32:59.000 Right on.

00:32:59.000 But hey, I'm also in the market for a suit.

00:33:02.000 I'm out in Wyoming.

00:33:04.000 And I was thinking about Nina Fashions, but I'll tell you, I ordered some sensitive TV t-shirts two weeks ago coming out of Vegas, and they're not to Wyoming yet.

00:33:16.000 Oh, that guy is the correct winner of the suit, by the way.

00:33:19.000 Yes, so we got him.

00:33:20.000 Yeah, we got to get him a suit.

00:33:22.000 That's true.

00:33:24.000 You're a correct sir.

00:33:25.000 I'm on it.

00:33:26.000 We're very slow with these things, I should say.

00:33:29.000 I don't usually handle stuff like that.

00:33:30.000 And by the way, I've got some news about sucking off a piece of shit.

00:33:35.000 People say, I got a letter that said, stop, stop, don't suck off a piece of shit.

00:33:39.000 You won the bet.

00:33:42.000 The bet was you drink a glass of bourbon or I suck off a piece of shit.

00:33:47.000 And there are people there saying that I won the bet.

00:33:51.000 Now, what was the bet?

00:33:52.000 Well, that's a great question.

00:33:54.000 Yeah.

00:33:56.000 How to boost Rye Guy's low IT?

00:34:00.000 I mean, tee.

00:34:01.000 Quit video games.

00:34:05.000 Laser.

00:34:05.000 Oh, loser.

00:34:07.000 Stop playing with your bangs.

00:34:08.000 Yes, please.

00:34:10.000 Three, take responsibility for one.

00:34:11.000 So that would be nice.

00:34:12.000 No excuses and not having to get the last word in.

00:34:15.000 And four, don't be Asian. 1.00

00:34:16.000 Okay, well, that's going to be tough.

00:34:19.000 I can't do that.

00:34:19.000 I'm cut with Puerto Rican, though, too, so that should help.

00:34:22.000 Would you rather discover incontrovertible evidence that flat earth is real or Trump won the 2020 election?

00:34:35.000 I would rather discover...

00:34:38.000 I have discovered that Trump won the election.

00:34:41.000 If you're talking, I assume in this thing, I get evidence that I can take to court.

00:34:45.000 As far as the earth being flat, if the earth is flat, everything I know is a lie.

00:34:52.000 God doesn't exist.

00:34:54.000 Nope.

00:34:54.000 Physics is wrong.

00:34:55.000 God superexists.

00:34:56.000 It's in the Bible.

00:34:57.000 It says the firmament, and then it mentions a lot of flat earth stuff.

00:35:02.000 So they would double your Bible-ness. 0.98

00:35:05.000 Okay.

00:35:05.000 Where are you with your flat earth, Mr. Different Brain every week?

00:35:10.000 I don't.

00:35:11.000 I'm not solid on it, but I have reasons to believe that maybe we don't live on a globe.

00:35:18.000 I don't trust the sources.

00:35:20.000 You know what I saw?

00:35:21.000 I saw a meme that said it was the Tower of Babel, and it said man's first attempt at space travel.

00:35:27.000 And it was the Tower of Babel. 0.84

00:35:29.000 And I was like, pretty good.

00:35:35.000 You're immune to the moon.

00:35:36.000 Isn't the moon awfully round?

00:35:38.000 They say the moon now is made of plasma, and it's a reflection of the earth.

00:35:44.000 I've just heard that from Josh LaCash.

00:35:47.000 Now, it's interesting.

00:35:49.000 I don't believe.

00:35:50.000 Here's what I do.

00:35:51.000 I don't believe.

00:35:52.000 Here's what I do know.

00:35:53.000 Here's what I do know.

00:35:54.000 No, no, no.

00:35:55.000 I don't believe in flat or globe earth.

00:35:58.000 I just know that I have reasons to disbelieve this whole thing.

00:36:01.000 This is a pussy-out bullshit thing that you always do where you go, I'm just, I'm asking questions. 0.99

00:36:06.000 I believe Plato said the only thing we know is that we know nothing.

00:36:10.000 So really?

00:36:12.000 You should talk to Plato.

00:36:13.000 You guys have the same IQ.

00:36:15.000 I like playing with Plato.

00:36:16.000 I used to eat it as a child.

00:36:18.000 Yeah, that was my joke, shit lips.

00:36:20.000 Hey, boys, what the fuck is the deal with Mexicans throwing poop paper in the trash? 1.00

00:36:24.000 Oh, yeah.

00:36:25.000 They don't.

00:36:26.000 In Central and South America, they don't have the same ability to handle paper in their sewage system.

00:36:34.000 They can only handle shit and piss. 1.00

00:36:36.000 So when Colombians, Dominicans, whatever, I see this at the boxing gym all the time, they wipe their ass with toilet paper, not just paper towels, toilet paper, and then they put it in the waste paper basket. 1.00

00:36:46.000 So there's Spanish signs at my gym that say, El no tiembro los paperos no toilete in the garbaggio.

00:36:55.000 That's impressive.

00:36:58.000 You may have run into this guy at AFPAC.

00:37:00.000 He's an American first guy running for office.

00:37:01.000 Just got fired from his job for saying he didn't like Dave Rubin gay adopting a baby.

00:37:06.000 If I recall you and Camille were talking about that recently, he probably would be a good guy to talk to.

00:37:09.000 His name is King Nub. 0.85

00:37:11.000 Oh, yeah, King Nub's great.

00:37:14.000 We did the one-arm push-ups together, and he got fired from his job.

00:37:17.000 Oh, he's in our movie.

00:37:19.000 Yes.

00:37:21.000 King Nub.

00:37:22.000 Yeah, he just got fired from his shit.

00:37:25.000 For not being for gay adoption.

00:37:29.000 He's such a nice dude, too.

00:37:30.000 Like, somebody said some bullshit to him.

00:37:32.000 There he is with you.

00:37:33.000 Yeah.

00:37:34.000 Somebody said some bullshit to him in this.

00:37:36.000 Like, they were like, ironic how you're standing up for blah, blah, blah.

00:37:40.000 Oh, no, not him.

00:37:40.000 You're for traditional family, but you don't have traditional arms.

00:37:44.000 Ever think of that?

00:37:45.000 That's pretty funny.

00:37:47.000 Some asshole was giving him shit, and he was just being nice to him.

00:37:51.000 He's like, hey, good joke, but no, dude, I actually have four kids and shit, so nice try, but nope.

00:37:56.000 I love when people flex like that.

00:37:58.000 You probably aren't even getting laid.

00:37:59.000 Or the other one is like, you probably have such a small dick. 0.96

00:38:04.000 It's like you're worried about my dick.

00:38:07.000 You prefer large dicks. 1.00

00:38:08.000 Is that what you're saying when you're talking to men?

00:38:11.000 Interesting.

00:38:12.000 Your dick probably tastes gross. 0.69

00:38:15.000 I bet your dick feels like a little worm in my half hour to touch it.

00:38:19.000 It probably takes forever to get hard.

00:38:21.000 And even when it is hard, it's not like rock hard.

00:38:24.000 It's just like kind of hard.

00:38:26.000 Are you still ben?

00:38:27.000 I bet when you shoot a load, it's just like, it would just be like a few drops of my beard.

00:38:32.000 It wouldn't even like fill my glasses.

00:38:34.000 Remember we were joking like that on the train once?

00:38:37.000 And we got a lecture from some old lady, Karen, who took us aside and told us everything wrong with this country?

00:38:42.000 Yes.

00:38:43.000 I called her, told her, mind her own fucking business, you stupid cunt. 1.00

00:38:47.000 And she went.

00:38:50.000 Yep.

00:38:51.000 She didn't get shut down.

00:38:52.000 This is an important one.

00:38:54.000 There are some frogs that don't just let you eat they ass. 1.00

00:38:59.000 Okay.

00:39:00.000 Okay.

00:39:01.000 Clicking.

00:39:02.000 And click.

00:39:02.000 I've already clicked and watched it.

00:39:03.000 Unloading.

00:39:04.000 Okay, I'm going to fix the alarm while you guys watch a snake and a frog and a frog not give up.

00:39:11.000 Doad.

00:39:22.000 Answer.

00:39:24.000 So the snake has the frog by the right foot.

00:39:29.000 Trying to eat some frog legs.

00:39:30.000 Now he's got his body now.

00:39:32.000 Oh! 0.60

00:39:33.000 The frog has escaped and is traversing the fence.

00:39:39.000 And the snake is nowhere to be seen anymore.

00:39:44.000 Yeah.

00:39:45.000 Now the frog's on the wall.

00:39:47.000 No chance for the snake.

00:39:49.000 Sorry, snake.

00:39:49.000 Maybe try again next time.

00:39:54.000 I think I turn it off.

00:39:55.000 I mean, what is more annoying than a fucking alarm?

00:39:59.000 This isn't our alarm, by the way.

00:40:00.000 We share a hallway with another office.

00:40:05.000 And every fucking night we come here.

00:40:08.000 The alarm is going beep, beep, beep, beep.

00:40:11.000 And then Ryan says, this is amazing.

00:40:14.000 He goes, we should tell them to disarm their alarm for when we're here.

00:40:19.000 And I go, what do you mean?

00:40:21.000 Why do you think it's going off?

00:40:22.000 Because we're here.

00:40:22.000 We don't go into their area.

00:40:25.000 And he goes, well, maybe it's when we open our front door.

00:40:28.000 Why would our front door be linked to their alarm?

00:40:33.000 I didn't think it out too much, but I did speak instantly.

00:40:41.000 That is a t-shirt.

00:40:43.000 You are the Kamala Harris of Censored TV.

00:40:48.000 Did you hear her Jamaican speech?

00:40:49.000 That's one of the letters we didn't get to.

00:40:54.000 Like now I'm hearing her and I'm like, don't you have a speechwriter at this point?

00:41:04.000 No one's really impressed.

00:41:05.000 I mean, there's JFK and all that, but when a normal, mediocre, run-of-the-mill politician does a talk and it's good, we're not like, wow, you're smart.

00:41:16.000 We just go, okay, he's got a good speechwriter and he managed to read it right.

00:41:20.000 But when someone, and then when they do like a Q ⁇ A, you get to see how smart they actually are, right?

00:41:25.000 Because they're not reading those translucent teleprompters.

00:41:29.000 But when you see fucking Kamala Harris, you're like, is she just going off the grid? 1.00

00:41:36.000 I'm off the grid.

00:41:38.000 What is this?

00:41:39.000 Is this just, hey, Kamala, we have the speech ready and we have the teleprompters.

00:41:43.000 No, actually, I'm going to just wing it.

00:41:47.000 Because that's how she's talking.

00:41:49.000 And, you know, I always say Tucker Carlson should just wing it.

00:41:53.000 If there's anyone who should not be reading a teleprompter, it's Tucker Carlson.

00:41:56.000 If there's anyone who should, it's fucking Pina Colada Harris. 1.00

00:42:01.000 It's pretty good.

00:42:02.000 I stole a few of them.

00:42:03.000 We also recognize, just as it has been in the United States for Jamaica, one of the issues that has been presented as an issue that is economic in the way of its impact has been the pandemic.

00:42:15.000 So to that end, we are announcing today also that we will assist Jamaica in COVID recovery by assisting in terms of the recovery efforts in Jamaica that have been essential to, I believe, what is necessary to strengthen not only the issue of public health,

00:42:34.000 but also the economy.

00:42:37.000 Okay, I know what happened there.

00:42:39.000 She has a piece of paper that says, we will continue to assist Jamaica.

00:42:45.000 We will consist them both economically and with the pandemic.

00:42:50.000 It's like three sentences like that.

00:42:52.000 And she's so confident, she's like, you know what?

00:42:55.000 I'll use these, but they're going to be like my spine.

00:42:58.000 They're going to be my basic beats.

00:43:00.000 And then I'm going to fucking add some other floral language to it to make it awesome. 1.00

00:43:06.000 Because people keep making fun of me.

00:43:08.000 And I'm sick of it.

00:43:09.000 And I am good at talking.

00:43:10.000 I was a lawyer for many years.

00:43:12.000 So watch me take these three sentences and weave them into this incredible tapestry of beautiful vocabulary.

00:43:21.000 And no.

00:43:22.000 When I saw her say that, I thought, weren't you in court ever?

00:43:26.000 Like, wasn't she a lawyer?

00:43:28.000 Didn't she have to deliver closing statements? 0.99

00:43:31.000 See if there's footage of her lawyer.

00:43:32.000 She's worse than Saul Goodman.

00:43:38.000 Someone is sending us the crazy hot matrix again.

00:43:42.000 Guys, if you're trying to make me mad, that's not as effective as putting the dollar sign on the wrong side of the number.

00:43:52.000 Oh, we haven't taken a call yet.

00:43:54.000 We have not taken a call.

00:43:55.000 Sorry, folks.

00:43:57.000 Shaiza.

00:43:58.000 Shaiza.

00:43:58.000 That's your job, dude.

00:43:59.000 My bads.

00:44:01.000 All right.

00:44:01.000 37 minutes on the hold.

00:44:03.000 You're now.

00:44:04.000 Sorry, caller.

00:44:06.000 Yo, what up?

00:44:08.000 What up, dog?

00:44:09.000 What's happening?

00:44:11.000 Nothing.

00:44:14.000 How many generations do you think the average millennial generations back do you think the average millennial knows like the grandparents?

00:44:23.000 What?

00:44:25.000 How many grandparents do you think the average millennial knows of theirs?

00:44:31.000 Four?

00:44:34.000 So your grandparents, grandparents, grandparents, grandparents?

00:44:40.000 Oh, you mean like generations or like how many people that are millennials know their grandparents?

00:44:45.000 Oh.

00:44:46.000 I would say most people my age have no grandparents.

00:44:49.000 I'm 50.

00:44:50.000 I would say most people Ryan's age, 30, have like two or three.

00:44:55.000 And I would say most people that are around 20 have all four.

00:45:00.000 Is that what you mean?

00:45:01.000 No, like the history.

00:45:02.000 No, like the history of it.

00:45:03.000 Do I know my grandparents' grandparents?

00:45:07.000 Oh, you're right.

00:45:07.000 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:45:08.000 No, none of us know that.

00:45:09.000 That's sad, but I guilt myself for that.

00:45:11.000 None of us know anything about our grandparents' parents.

00:45:16.000 Yeah, I think that's the problem.

00:45:17.000 I do, but...

00:45:18.000 I don't know.

00:45:19.000 Look, I'll never forget.

00:45:20.000 I was at a cemetery in Paris on my honeymoon, and I was looking at these gravestones, and they were gone.

00:45:28.000 Like, you couldn't read anything on them, but occasionally you could make out a date, and the date would be like 1910.

00:45:34.000 And I realized that we're talking about grandparents' parents here, and the gravestones were gone.

00:45:41.000 Now, there was no effort to replace them because some people go to their grandparents' gravesite.

00:45:46.000 No one goes to anyone else's.

00:45:48.000 Like, you don't go to your grandparents' parents.

00:45:51.000 So, yeah.

00:45:52.000 And the thing about boomers, like the greatest generation, they were just happy to be alive.

00:45:57.000 So, they didn't really carry on any kind of history of their parents, at least not in my culture.

00:46:02.000 In Scottish culture, like my grandfather didn't even tell his kids his real name, which was McGinnis.

00:46:10.000 Anyway, thanks for calling.

00:46:11.000 I think it's a myth that we used to have this great connection with our ancestors, and now we don't.

00:46:18.000 I get what he's saying, but I don't think that's a thing.

00:46:20.000 Yeah, because the guys at the Knights of Columbus, they got some bomb ass stories.

00:46:23.000 They won't even tell you.

00:46:25.000 And they're, you know, that's weird, right?

00:46:28.000 Like, you think if they had these badasses. 1.00

00:46:30.000 That's a totally different subject, Ryan.

00:46:31.000 Well, those guys are talking about the 70s when they were alive.

00:46:35.000 They're not talking about their grandparents.

00:46:38.000 But I think as you go up in generations, they're less likely to just tell you about their lives.

00:46:44.000 It's like, oh, that's a story for another day.

00:46:47.000 You're like, come on, man.

00:46:48.000 Fucking tell me something.

00:46:49.000 This guy's Engage 206.

00:46:52.000 Hey, Gavin, Ururu.

00:46:54.000 Uhuru.

00:46:56.000 Hey, so I called a couple weeks ago talking about engagement, and you shared the story about how you can fuck it up pretty bad.

00:47:03.000 So, you know, do it well.

00:47:05.000 So being able to say a couple weeks ago got engaged to my now fiance.

00:47:09.000 Nice.

00:47:09.000 And it was the time of her life.

00:47:11.000 She was over the moon.

00:47:12.000 We're both very ecstatic and looking forward to marriage and kids.

00:47:16.000 And yeah, honestly, one of the greatest decisions of my life.

00:47:19.000 So thanks for pushing me in that direction.

00:47:22.000 No problem, pal.

00:47:24.000 And a lot of letters like this today.

00:47:26.000 This message has been the predominant message for this show.

00:47:30.000 Well, I think it's important, especially for guys my age, you know, 25, 26 that are hesitant towards commitment.

00:47:36.000 And it's huge.

00:47:39.000 So, you know, I just was curious, could you highlight the importance of the nuclear family, especially in like 2022?

00:47:48.000 Yeah.

00:47:49.000 I mean, I hate that people say, you know, I'm glad I'm on the back end and, you know, my life's over and give up.

00:47:57.000 There's no sense in carrying on.

00:47:59.000 But all of these problems that we have with America, they're all pretty circumstantial and superficial.

00:48:08.000 And nothing changes your life more drastically than getting married and having kids.

00:48:13.000 So that's what you should be focused on.

00:48:14.000 Not the Dow Jones or a potential war with fucking Russia or any of that stupid shit.

00:48:22.000 And once you have these kids, you realize how silly it was and how petty it was for you to be worried about all that other dumb shit, Ukraine and fucking everything else. 0.83

00:48:32.000 I mean, I'm not saying that you shouldn't be concerned about issues like the fagification of youth, but once you have kids, you realize that all that is just ancillary and what really matters is you and your offspring every day. 0.99

00:48:47.000 And of course, nothing raises kids like two parents staying together.

00:48:53.000 It's not even really, it's a jalopy, it's a patched together piece of shit of a childhood when your parents are divorced.

00:49:02.000 So, I mean, you're still parenting, I guess, but that doesn't really count.

00:49:06.000 So, yeah, stay together, make babies, party if you want to party.

00:49:13.000 But as we've learned from Pauly Shore and Liz Plank and publicity, like these women are fucking miserable because they fucked up. 1.00

00:49:21.000 Partying isn't that great.

00:49:23.000 Anyway, thanks for calling.

00:49:25.000 Thanks, Kevin.

00:49:26.000 Thanks for calling.

00:49:29.000 Now we got this bloke.

00:49:32.000 Scott wants to talk about big fucking tits. 1.00

00:49:37.000 Someone sent me a video of Ava Devine being throat fucked, and it's very distracting.

00:49:45.000 Hey, bro.

00:49:47.000 Whoa.

00:49:48.000 Hello.

00:49:51.000 Go.

00:49:52.000 Hey, I got this idea that I worked today, and I thought it would be a great idea.

00:49:55.000 Are you calling from the apocalypse?

00:49:57.000 Yeah, what's it like over there, sir?

00:50:00.000 It's hot.

00:50:01.000 Very hot.

00:50:03.000 We can't hear you.

00:50:04.000 Yeah, it sounds like shit.

00:50:05.000 All right, one sec.

00:50:06.000 Let me try taking it off the headset.

00:50:12.000 How's that?

00:50:13.000 A little better.

00:50:14.000 A little better.

00:50:15.000 A little bit shitty.

00:50:18.000 Okay, I was thinking about a show with about big fucking pits where some dudes sit around and they talk about shit at the bar, you know, like, hey, you see that chick over there? 1.00

00:50:30.000 Yeah, I fucked her last night. 1.00

00:50:32.000 Starring Elliot Page and Chaz Bono.

00:50:38.000 Okay, that's a funny idea.

00:50:39.000 Anyway, thanks for calling.

00:50:40.000 We can't hear you.

00:50:41.000 It's all staticky and shitty.

00:50:42.000 Sorry, sir.

00:50:49.000 Okay, we got 847 on the line.

00:50:54.000 Hello?

00:50:55.000 Can you hear me?

00:50:56.000 What's going on, buddy?

00:50:59.000 How's it going, buddy?

00:51:01.000 Oh, my gosh.

00:51:02.000 What is cooking up the old chimney, pal?

00:51:07.000 I don't know, just a little carry, and you know.

00:51:10.000 But anyway, I had serious questions for you.

00:51:12.000 I'm going to cut the shit.

00:51:15.000 I was curious about how your wife and your mom react to the anti-Femite talk.

00:51:23.000 My wife doesn't watch this show. 1.00

00:51:25.000 I agree with you.

00:51:26.000 My wife doesn't watch this show at all. 1.00

00:51:29.000 My mom has brought it up a couple of times where she goes, you know, you talk about women in the workforce and you say that I stayed home, but as soon as you started going to school, I was employed.

00:51:40.000 I was like, no, really?

00:51:41.000 You were like a teacher, so you could come home when it was time for me to come home.

00:51:46.000 I wasn't a latchkey child like all my friends were.

00:51:51.000 But she objects a lot, but, you know, she gets it. 0.98

00:51:54.000 I think my anti-femite stuff is ultimately kind of feminist, and most women that watch This show appreciate it because I'm not saying you're too stupid to be in the workforce, I'm saying you tend not to belong. 0.62

00:52:06.000 It's like women in fucking combat sports. 1.00

00:52:10.000 Now, are women offended when you say you shouldn't be fighting Mike Tyson or you shouldn't be at rallies like Heather Heyer was? 1.00

00:52:19.000 I don't think normal women are offended by that. 1.00

00:52:22.000 And that's why I always make it clear to call them shit chests and not normal women. 1.00

00:52:26.000 Like the kindergarten teachers we had when we were kids, they were nice ladies who said boys will be boys. 1.00

00:52:32.000 They were wonderful, loving human beings.

00:52:34.000 It's this twisted, shitty robot that we have now.

00:52:39.000 Anyway, thanks for calling.

00:52:40.000 Yeah, I agree with it.

00:52:42.000 I do worry sometimes, though, like if my daughter ever sees this show, that she's going to think that I don't think that she can be whatever she wants to be.

00:52:49.000 And I want to be clear here.

00:52:51.000 Best prime minister Britain ever had was Margaret Atwood.

00:52:58.000 Margaret Thatcher.

00:53:00.000 Sorry.

00:53:02.000 Yeah, so some of my, I don't think women can write, but my favorite writers are women. 1.00

00:53:07.000 There's things called exceptions to the rules.

00:53:10.000 So if you're determined to be the greatest female oncologist in the world, all the power to you. 0.77

00:53:16.000 I'm just saying, most women are kidding themselves when they take on these male roles. 0.99

00:53:22.000 Here's one.

00:53:23.000 Mr. Kevin, you're incredulous with Thomas Sowell's Black Rednecks. 1.00

00:53:27.000 You suggested that Sowell hasn't read Albion Seed, and it has nothing to do with the South.

00:53:34.000 Sir, I've read it, have you?

00:53:36.000 There's a whole section called Borderlands to the Back Country about the Scotch-Irish and border culture and how it influenced Virginia and Southern culture.

00:53:46.000 What the fuck are you talking about?

00:53:53.000 He's got you there, Gavin.

00:53:55.000 And another thing, too.

00:53:57.000 You thought you made a mistake before when you said Margaret Atwood.

00:54:02.000 But let me riddle you this, big guy.

00:54:05.000 Did you ever see a picture of them side to side?

00:54:08.000 Have you?

00:54:09.000 No.

00:54:10.000 Have you ever seen them in the same room?

00:54:13.000 No.

00:54:15.000 That's the same person.

00:54:17.000 Holy shit.

00:54:18.000 They're my...

00:54:19.000 I have no idea.

00:54:20.000 Yep.

00:54:20.000 Well, Margaret Atwood does a really good British accent.

00:54:24.000 It's a clever trick.

00:54:25.000 It's like the Clark Kent.

00:54:27.000 He just makes his hair different, and you think it's a different person.

00:54:31.000 We're not fooled.

00:54:34.000 No, I have to address this, though.

00:54:37.000 You're right.

00:54:37.000 I only read the first quarter of Albion Seed and I found it really boring.

00:54:42.000 I also gave up because I thought, why am I reading about just the Northeast?

00:54:47.000 I care more about Scots and the South and stuff.

00:54:50.000 So I guess I abandoned the book before I got to the part.

00:54:53.000 But then I read a whole review about it, and I thought it didn't say anything about the South.

00:54:58.000 So I was wrong.

00:55:00.000 I fucked up.

00:55:01.000 I would like to hereby professionally apologize to Mr. Soul.

00:55:07.000 Okay?

00:55:08.000 You got me.

00:55:08.000 I fucked up.

00:55:09.000 I was wrong.

00:55:12.000 You know, they used to call me Mr. Soul in high school.

00:55:15.000 What happened Asian? 0.97

00:55:18.000 Let's take some more calls here.

00:55:19.000 I feel bad we pushed the calls till so late.

00:55:22.000 We got 331.

00:55:25.000 You're on the line.

00:55:28.000 Amazing.

00:55:29.000 Amazing.

00:55:30.000 Amazing.

00:55:31.000 Beta! 0.86

00:55:33.000 I know.

00:55:33.000 Beta!

00:55:35.000 I know it's kind of A-T in a Chinese secret, but I remember Gavin talking about one of the shows about everyone wearing ski masks and whatnot.

00:55:44.000 And Ryan, you're actually right.

00:55:45.000 They are Balaklavas. 1.00

00:55:47.000 I live here in Chicago, and like, especially in the rap scene and all that, like, everyone, you know, just loves wearing the face mask because I guess it was popularized by this rapper, Pooh Sheisty.

00:55:58.000 And now everyone, like, wears the ski mask.

00:56:00.000 And there's even like rappers now that are like associating it with their image, just like wearing the ski mask.

00:56:06.000 So you walk down the street and you see like everyone, like, well, not like everyone, but like, you know, all of these pretty much mainly like black people and like ghetto people just like wearing ski masks because they think like it's like cool. 0.99

00:56:19.000 I guess it's like a trend now, but yeah.

00:56:21.000 It looks so fucking stupid, it drives me insane.

00:56:26.000 That trend, like who knew, who knew saggy jeans would be the least of our worries?

00:56:31.000 Those retarded eyelashes that are not just black, that's everywhere now. 0.99

00:56:36.000 The black shower caps that we see on the plane, and now this, with just showing this part of your face, it's embarrassing.

00:56:48.000 You look like you just took your helmet off from an F-14 fighter jet and you're wondering what is going on with the fuel injection.

00:56:57.000 But you're getting a jacket out of the trunk.

00:57:00.000 I fucking hate it.

00:57:02.000 Anyway, thanks for calling, sir.

00:57:05.000 So this is again with the predominant theme of tonight's show.

00:57:09.000 Gavin, you're the reason for my happiness.

00:57:11.000 I'll try to condense the story behind my gratitude.

00:57:13.000 A few years back, I was a cringe liberal feminist. 1.00

00:57:15.000 This is from a woman.

00:57:18.000 I overheard my boyfriend listening to GML.

00:57:21.000 I thought you were funny and interesting, but you pissed me off with some comments you made about divorce.

00:57:26.000 I'm divorced.

00:57:27.000 When I realized the reason for this was that I actually agreed with you, I went to seek similar uncomfortable truths.

00:57:34.000 Part of that involved consuming nearly all of your content.

00:57:37.000 While this was happening, I noticed your name often paired with white supremacists.

00:57:40.000 And of course, the Proud Boys paired with Hate Group in the media and various posts written by people I respect and trusted.

00:57:46.000 I was surprised.

00:57:47.000 If I had listened to you talk for hundreds of hours, wouldn't I pick up on any Nazi vibes, however subtle?

00:57:53.000 How could people I previously thought of as intelligent make those accusations with such confidence when they clearly hadn't done any critical thinking to get there?

00:58:03.000 Thus began my journey away from the left.

00:58:06.000 I actually met Ryan a while back when I was in town for work and I came to the studio on a night you weren't there.

00:58:12.000 I think I could have met you at karaoke afterward, but missed you due to timing.

00:58:17.000 If I recall correctly, your wife said I look like Selena Gomez.

00:58:21.000 So wait, my wife was out partying with you guys doing karaoke and I wasn't there?

00:58:25.000 I don't think she met your wife.

00:58:29.000 Oh wait.

00:58:31.000 No.

00:58:32.000 That was the night you, me, and Tony and their missuses did a karaoke.

00:58:38.000 No, Detective Shitty's wrong again.

00:58:41.000 Oh, wait.

00:58:42.000 I do remember my wife going out with Proud Boys and I couldn't be there for some reason.

00:58:47.000 I think I was out of town completely, like in another city.

00:58:52.000 And I set up the meet.

00:58:54.000 Interesting.

00:58:56.000 Yeah.

00:58:56.000 But I know her.

00:58:57.000 She's really cool, really smart.

00:59:00.000 But incredibly overweight.

00:59:02.000 She is a huge, disgusting beast. 1.00

00:59:06.000 But smart.

00:59:08.000 Fast forward a bit.

00:59:09.000 Not smart about her food choices, though.

00:59:11.000 Yeah.

00:59:13.000 She's smart, reading everything but the menu.

00:59:16.000 Not the nutritional facts.

00:59:19.000 That's for sure.

00:59:20.000 Fast forward a bit.

00:59:21.000 I joined the Gab McKinsey Discord after the MAU did and ended up meeting the guy I'm currently engaged to.

00:59:26.000 Congratulations.

00:59:28.000 Congratulations.

00:59:30.000 Let me just ask my ass what it thinks. 0.85

00:59:37.000 Congratulations.

00:59:38.000 That's butt cheeks for congratulations. 0.98

00:59:40.000 That's Nazi buns for congratulations. 0.99

00:59:43.000 I'll even kiss the men.

00:59:45.000 You rescued me from the circus and brought me to the land of logic.

00:59:48.000 You helped me embrace my femininity and find fulfillment in my God-given purpose of being a wife and mother.

00:59:55.000 Without you, I wouldn't be getting remarried next year to a man who shares my values and is capable of leading a family.

01:00:02.000 I am eternally grateful.

01:00:04.000 I know this sounds corny, but I cannot tell you how many letters I have like this.

01:00:10.000 And people, every time I talk to a journalist, they're like, are you going to take any ownership for the violent rhetoric you said and how so many proud boys are in jail?

01:00:20.000 Don't you wish you had not started this whole thing in the first place?

01:00:23.000 If you were never born, those guys wouldn't be in jail.

01:00:26.000 I'm like, okay, thanks.

01:00:27.000 I got you.

01:00:28.000 But I couldn't tell you the hundreds and hundreds of letters I get from people saying, thank you for telling me to put a ring on it.

01:00:35.000 Thank you for getting me away from video games.

01:00:37.000 Thank you for telling me to get in shape.

01:00:39.000 Thank you for telling me to stop being a fucking loser and begin my adult life.

01:00:44.000 Thank you for telling me to stop wearing shirts that say stupid shit on them and wearing, dressing like an adult.

01:00:51.000 Yeah, be like, how many lives have you literally created in babies?

01:00:55.000 Yeah.

01:00:56.000 You know?

01:00:57.000 Yeah.

01:00:57.000 I've created your baby.

01:00:59.000 Yeah.

01:00:59.000 You went from the godfather of hipsterdom to just the godfather.

01:01:03.000 No, I went from the godfather of hipsterdom to the father.

01:01:06.000 Period.

01:01:08.000 I'm also enraged at the incompetence of your employee.

01:01:12.000 Excuse you?

01:01:13.000 You?

01:01:13.000 Me?

01:01:13.000 I won a box of meat last year when I called into the live show, and despite numerous reminders, I'm still meatless.

01:01:20.000 You know what?

01:01:20.000 I passed that.

01:01:21.000 I did my part.

01:01:22.000 Okay, but I'm angry for you now because if it was in my hands, I would just send you a fucking idea.

01:01:30.000 Rachel, if you'll allow me to apologize, the guy did die.

01:01:36.000 Like, Bubba and Hanks were our meat suppliers, and Bubba croaked.

01:01:41.000 So I'm sorry if he didn't do a great job of supplying you with meat, but I think they were still getting orders after, and it wasn't an easy cleanup there.

01:01:50.000 It's not like one of the fry guys at McDonald's died.

01:01:53.000 Ronald McDonald died.

01:01:55.000 Yeah.

01:01:57.000 I'm still meatless.

01:01:58.000 Well, I found another meat in the sense that I bought other meat since then.

01:02:02.000 I haven't been a vegetarian.

01:02:04.000 I like you more than a friend.

01:02:05.000 Your number one baby monster.

01:02:07.000 Oh.

01:02:08.000 Self-dubbed.

01:02:09.000 Wow.

01:02:16.000 All right.

01:02:17.000 We got five minutes left.

01:02:18.000 Let's cram in as many calls and live chats as we can.

01:02:21.000 All right, fucking Robert.

01:02:22.000 What's up, Rob?

01:02:26.000 We're doing a super speed mega call.

01:02:29.000 We're going to get through 11 calls in five minutes.

01:02:32.000 Rob, are you there?

01:02:34.000 Yo, what's going on?

01:02:35.000 Not much.

01:02:36.000 What's up?

01:02:39.000 About the 12-year-old killing herself and her cousin, what actually happened is she actually accidentally killed her cousin.

01:02:50.000 And when she realized that she just murdered someone, she killed herself on purpose.

01:02:55.000 Yeah, that's what everyone says.

01:02:57.000 But I looked at the video, and it looks like the second shot is immediately after the first shot.

01:03:02.000 Bang, bang. 0.99

01:03:04.000 No, no, no.

01:03:05.000 It wasn't immediately after.

01:03:07.000 There was a good, like, three seconds before that where she, like, collapses to the ground, then she, like, offs herself. 0.50

01:03:17.000 But, yeah, there's been a couple articles about it, and they're all saying the same thing, that it was an accidental killing, and then, you know, she.

01:03:26.000 All right.

01:03:26.000 Well, thanks for calling.

01:03:27.000 We got the timing off on the gun shot.

01:03:30.000 I don't know, though.

01:03:30.000 I listened.

01:03:31.000 I didn't hear that second shot.

01:03:32.000 I heard the bonk bonk, but who gives a fuck? 0.99

01:03:35.000 And everyone says it was an accident.

01:03:37.000 Well, no.

01:03:39.000 They're little kids, 12 and 13, and they're smoking pot, posing with guns.

01:03:43.000 The accident happened way before the accident happened.

01:03:46.000 Yes, go ahead, please, call her.

01:03:49.000 Hey, can you hear me, Gavin?

01:03:50.000 Yes.

01:03:52.000 All right, cool.

01:03:53.000 First thing is, Gavin, you're hilarious, man.

01:03:56.000 When you're talking about the 460-pound Malaysian bodybuilder, I was like, how is Gavin not completely destroyed this man for marrying her right off the bat? 0.87

01:04:05.000 The second thing is I figured out Ruth Gator Binsberg.

01:04:09.000 Yeah, you don't get a second thing.

01:04:10.000 Sorry.

01:04:11.000 Thanks for calling.

01:04:12.000 You blew your first thing on compliments.

01:04:15.000 Anyway, next caller, please.

01:04:17.000 Sorry, sir.

01:04:17.000 Try again next time.

01:04:18.000 You've made the mistake that a thousand before you have made.

01:04:21.000 Hey, stop kissing ass, Faggot. 1.00

01:04:23.000 You're such a woman.

01:04:24.000 I was buying time.

01:04:26.000 I don't know where it's going.

01:04:28.000 So here's some Cash for the Kinsman shout at Central Illinois.

01:04:31.000 This is actually going to Joe Biggs.

01:04:33.000 Yes.

01:04:33.000 We have a year left with Max and John, so we'll really be ramping up the fundraising for them.

01:04:38.000 Yep.

01:04:39.000 And now we're going to have.

01:04:40.000 Fuck it.

01:04:41.000 Don't.

01:04:41.000 Fuck it.

01:04:42.000 Don't suck it.

01:04:43.000 Okay.

01:04:45.000 Fuck it.

01:04:45.000 Don't suck it.

01:04:46.000 Thanks for calling.

01:04:47.000 That's a shirt.

01:04:48.000 Next caller.

01:04:49.000 Sorry, you already used your thing.

01:04:51.000 Be very careful.

01:04:52.000 Yeah, one thing.

01:04:53.000 We have fucking three minutes left.

01:04:55.000 Next call.

01:04:56.000 207.

01:04:57.000 207.

01:04:58.000 Oh, yeah.

01:04:58.000 Hi, guys.

01:04:59.000 Yeah, I called about the JFK assassination.

01:05:01.000 I heard you guys talking about it with Air TV.

01:05:04.000 One of the best series I've ever heard is investing about this, you can kind of keep the stuff about the mafia and whatever else you want to keep.

01:05:14.000 But one of the things that happened, or one of the things that people think happened, is, and it's a great book by, and this is not a fake name.

01:05:20.000 His name's Bonner Man.

01:05:22.000 Stop interrupting yourself.

01:05:25.000 What?

01:05:26.000 You keep interrupting yourself.

01:05:28.000 And this is a theory, and it's not a theory that you have to have.

01:05:30.000 It's also a book.

01:05:31.000 It's a great book.

01:05:34.000 Tell us.

01:05:35.000 The thing is, Lee Harvey Oswald fired a shot.

01:05:38.000 He did hit JFK one time, but the Secret Service was out getting wasted the night before at a strip club or something in Dallas.

01:05:46.000 And they had a B squad up for the motorcade.

01:05:51.000 And when the shot went down, everything went down.

01:05:53.000 They freaked out.

01:05:54.000 One of the Secret Service agents named George Hickey actually accidentally shot JFK in the back of the head.

01:06:00.000 And this guy named Donning, he would spend his life researching it, doing all the ballistic stuff, the forensic stuff.

01:06:07.000 And there's a really good documentary called JFK The Smoking Gun.

01:06:11.000 If you have any time to look it up.

01:06:13.000 He's right.

01:06:14.000 Okay, thanks for calling.

01:06:16.000 Trusting theory.

01:06:17.000 I think I did hear something about that.

01:06:18.000 Yeah, the guy's name is funny, though.

01:06:20.000 Bonner Meninger.

01:06:23.000 What do you got in your pants?

01:06:25.000 That's a Bonner Meninger. 0.96

01:06:28.000 Infel 860, you're on the lean.

01:06:31.000 And on the line.

01:06:33.000 You're on both.

01:06:34.000 You're on the lean.

01:06:35.000 G-Dog.

01:06:36.000 Hey, man.

01:06:36.000 G-Dog, my guy.

01:06:38.000 One minute left.

01:06:39.000 What's up, dude?

01:06:41.000 Hey, I lived down the street from where the Proud Boys were.

01:06:46.000 I saw them.

01:06:47.000 I didn't know anything that they were Proud Boys.

01:06:50.000 I wish I did.

01:06:51.000 I would have yelled a Huru or a fucking the bird which is. 1.00

01:06:56.000 Where are you talking about?

01:06:57.000 Long Island?

01:06:59.000 No, Enfield.

01:07:01.000 Oh, really?

01:07:03.000 Yeah, well, if you're in Enfield, go by that place and say, what's going on here?

01:07:09.000 Don't get violent.

01:07:10.000 Don't harass any of that stuff, obviously.

01:07:12.000 But just say, I don't understand.

01:07:14.000 Like, I want them to know how many people are confused by this shit.

01:07:19.000 Oh, you should have seen the bashing people were doing on Facebook on the local forum.

01:07:25.000 All these people with fucking dog pictures, anime pictures, none of their faces.

01:07:30.000 It's insane.

01:07:32.000 What, bashing Proud Boys for daring to donate 800 pounds of food?

01:07:37.000 Yes.

01:07:38.000 It's insane.

01:07:40.000 It's clownware world.

01:07:42.000 Fucking clownwear.

01:07:43.000 Sorry?

01:07:44.000 Can't say it enough.

01:07:45.000 Like, I don't understand.

01:07:47.000 So what's their argument?

01:07:48.000 You're trying to launder your image?

01:07:50.000 It's not going to work, assholes.

01:07:53.000 You guys are fascist neo-Nazis.

01:07:55.000 You know, the regular.

01:07:56.000 The regular bullshit.

01:07:58.000 But now they're saying they're going to donate to make up for the bullshit that they threw out.

01:08:04.000 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

01:08:05.000 I heard that.

01:08:06.000 So the liberals, and I talked to one of the Proud Boys involved tonight about that, and he goes, okay, so the only way we can get you liberals to donate anything to the poor is when we do it, and then you want to outdo us just to spite us.

01:08:20.000 Okay.

01:08:21.000 Poor people are getting fed.

01:08:22.000 At least we got some money raised, you fucking dunces.

01:08:26.000 All right, thanks for calling.

01:08:28.000 And on that note, I'm on my way to California holiday.

01:08:31.000 We'll try to visit Mercedes.

01:08:32.000 She's in Rancho Cucamonga, San Bernardino.

01:08:36.000 We've been writing each other letters.

01:08:37.000 Oh, good.

01:08:38.000 Okay.

01:08:38.000 Also writing letters to John Kay.

01:08:40.000 Isn't that great?

01:08:40.000 Yeah, that's fantastic.

01:08:42.000 That guy had a great How Dare You Media YouTube video that he just put a compilation of The War on Kids.

01:08:47.000 Check that out.

01:08:49.000 Here is 500 bucks.

01:08:50.000 What a cruel world we're living where Biggs, a national hero.

01:08:52.000 He's literally a national hero, by the way.

01:08:54.000 He has two purple hearts.

01:08:56.000 His Humvee blew up.

01:08:57.000 He went over a landmine or a IED over there.

01:09:04.000 This guy is not just plucked out of nowhere.

01:09:08.000 Yet Ryan gets to rock out on YouTube for an audience of eight each day as a free man.

01:09:12.000 Yeah, that's right.

01:09:13.000 Sometimes there's 13.

01:09:14.000 If we could do anything, we would switch places with Ryan.

01:09:17.000 I wouldn't.

01:09:17.000 And Biggs.

01:09:18.000 But we do want to thank you for the $500 is not a.

01:09:23.000 Thank you.

01:09:23.000 That's a great donation.

01:09:25.000 All right, folks.

01:09:26.000 See you soon.

01:09:27.000 See you Monday.

01:09:28.000 Got plenty of surprises to fill in the hole on my Friday absence.

01:09:33.000 And Tuesday, we're going to go pick up that jag.

01:09:36.000 So we'll make sure we make it fun for you.

01:09:38.000 New episode of Car Guys.

01:09:39.000 It's been a while.

01:09:40.000 I'm going to put up all my old free speech podcasts on the site, as well as a little documentary I did with the punk band Crass about the murder, state overreach murder that inspired them.

01:09:56.000 Anyway.

01:09:58.000 Uh-oh.

01:09:58.000 I thought you promised to suck off a piece of shit when someone donated $100.

01:10:01.000 It had something to do with the prostitute doing the same delicious act. 0.66

01:10:05.000 Hmm.

01:10:05.000 It doesn't ring a bell for me.

01:10:07.000 It doesn't ring a bell.

01:10:08.000 I wouldn't.

01:10:08.000 Why would I, how does that, the glass of bourbon with Ryan then?

01:10:11.000 Yeah.

01:10:12.000 Okay, guys.

01:10:13.000 So maybe, Ryan, you can keep those running.

01:10:15.000 How many do you have left of those?

01:10:17.000 Two more.

01:10:17.000 Okay, so that's two.

01:10:19.000 And I'm going to say, get fired, get in trouble, be brave, and never stop fighting.

01:10:41.000 And you can see it everywhere.

01:10:43.000 The famine and the fear.

01:10:44.000 The doubt and the drown.

01:10:46.000 Desperation and the fear.

01:10:48.000 And you can see it all around.

01:10:49.000 The massacres abound.

01:10:51.000 Dead bodies all around.

01:10:53.000 The atrocities abound.

01:10:54.000 Missing persons can be found.

01:10:56.000 The fatas get the throne.

01:10:57.000 New towns are quickly found.

01:11:01.000 The eagle and the fear of people living in fear of impending nuclear warfare.

01:11:07.000 But as a matter of fact, believe it or not, plenty people don't care whether it came an end or not.

01:11:14.000 Or first going to attack or if the human race have a survivor or not. 0.90

01:11:19.000 For those of means that we are on the air.

01:11:28.000 I just I saw your thing had to do with testosterone.

01:11:34.000 What's up, Ryan?

01:11:36.000 Do you have tips for me or something?

01:11:37.000 I could use a tip.

01:11:40.000 Yes, I do.

01:11:41.000 Okay, you're over the age of 25.

01:11:43.000 That's cool.

01:11:44.000 Obviously, you can start taking testosterone.

01:11:47.000 Yeah.

01:11:48.000 Like, there is no, there is no reason you can't be fertile still and have more kids and take like 100 to 200 milligrams a week. 0.94

01:11:57.000 And that's a shot, right?

01:11:59.000 You pin it?

01:12:00.000 Yeah, and that's for the rest of your life.

01:12:02.000 What happens if you miss a week?

01:12:04.000 Like, if I'm on vacation or emergency happens or something?

01:12:08.000 It's easy enough that you could take it with you.

01:12:10.000 Okay.

01:12:10.000 There's no reason to miss a week.

01:12:13.000 But it is forever, yeah.

01:12:15.000 What's that?

01:12:16.000 It is forever.

01:12:17.000 And then do you also have to do some sort of like hormone balancing from that as well, too?

01:12:25.000 Yeah, you can take like HCG, which is, it's like when women take a pregnancy test, that's what pops up that they're pregnant when they're producing HCG.

01:12:34.000 Women produce it when they're pregnant. 1.00

01:12:36.000 But it's a fertility drug.

01:12:38.000 So you can take that throughout your cycles and it will make sure you still stay fertile and stuff so you can have more kids. 1.00

01:12:46.000 Oh, okay.

01:12:48.000 So.

01:12:49.000 So, but that's the only thing you'd really need to balance out the testosterone because it does.

01:12:55.000 That's what scares me.

01:12:56.000 There is the estrogen fact.

01:12:58.000 But yeah, you need like an AI, like a retrozole or something like that, something to block the estrogen from forming up and building up.

01:13:07.000 But you'll know, it's really unlikely when you're taking like 200, like a low dose like that.

01:13:13.000 Like I've been, I do, I'm 21 and I do like bodybuilder doses.

01:13:18.000 So I do like 600 a week.

01:13:21.000 So that's like three times what you would be doing.

01:13:25.000 And I don't need, I haven't gotten any like nipple sensitivity, no gyno, no estrogen buildup.

01:13:31.000 Interesting.

01:13:31.000 So it's, it's pretty, it's not as hard in your body as they say it is.

01:13:35.000 Yeah.

01:13:35.000 I mean, it's destigmatized to a large extent, but I'm going to take a choose on the air.

01:13:42.000 Yeah.

01:13:43.000 Well, we got to go.

01:13:45.000 But thank you.

01:13:46.000 Thank you for your tips.

01:13:48.000 I just saw the testosterone thing.

01:13:49.000 I thought it'd be interesting.

01:13:50.000 But yeah, I'm going to look into it.

01:13:52.000 I'm also going to do another test, and we're going to do tests on the air to see where me and Gavin's testosterone rank up.

01:13:59.000 Oh, yeah, for sure.

01:14:01.000 Because Gavin can take it too.

01:14:02.000 Gavin's definitely old enough to take it now.

01:14:04.000 He probably has lower testosterone than he says he has.

01:14:07.000 He looks upset that you said that.

01:14:09.000 But thanks for calling.

01:14:11.000 He'll build a fuck ton of muscle if he starts taking it.

01:14:14.000 That's true.

01:14:15.000 Thank you, sir.

01:14:16.000 But yeah, thanks for taking my call.

01:14:18.000 I'll see you guys.

01:14:18.000 Later, dude.

Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - April 01, 2022

GOML LIVE #142 Part 2 - Piña Colada Harris

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Transcript