Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes


GOML LIVE #148 - SHITSHOW (Part 1)


Summary

Gavin McInnes and Ryan Higa are joined by the return of Sylvia to the show by Matty O'Dell, who's back from the hospital with a broken hip. They talk about the Bobby Lees' new album, how they're going to pay for Max and John's medical bills, and what it's like to have a 6-month old on the show. Plus, the boys talk about their plans for a live show in Orlando, Florida on June 25th, and how much they'd like to raise for Max & John's legal fees and medical bills. They also talk about why they don't want to bring a baby to the live show, and why it's a good thing they're not having a baby. And, of course, there's a new segment called "Get Off My Lawn Live" which is a live version of the show Gavin and Ryan do live on Censored TV and is available for free on the internet for the first time ever. It's called "Censored Live" and it's hosted by TinyURL. Subscribe to getoffmylawn.tv and get 20% off your first month with the promo code "censoredlive" at checkout! Get off my lawn.tv/getoffmylooflawn and use coupon code "GavinMcInnes" to receive $5 off your purchase of $50 or more! Getoffmyelawn at Tinyurl.tv to get 10% off the first month, plus free shipping on your first purchase of a copy of TinyURL's newest issue, and a free of the TinyURL product! Get off My Lawn printable poster and t-shirt, and more! Get on my lawn with the code "Get off my Lawn" at TinyURL, and we'll send you an ad-free version of this podcast! Subscribe and review the show on Apple Podcasts! and leave us a review! Got a question or suggestion? Send us a screenshot of what you'd like us to us on your favorite streaming platform? Thanks, Gavin & Ryan are listening to this episode of the podcast and/or your thoughts on the podcast? Got it? We'll be listening to the episode and reviewing it on Apple Music? or your thoughts/tweet us in the pod? & we'll get a shoutout on the next episode will be featured in next week's episode on the pod! Thanks!


Transcript

00:00:13.000 Live from New York, it's Get Off My Lawn with Gavin McInnes!
00:00:20.000 We got some buffering.
00:00:41.000 I already know the title of the show.
00:00:43.000 Shit Show.
00:00:45.000 I'm writing it down right now.
00:00:46.000 Shit Show.
00:00:49.000 It's been a shit show and we haven't even started yet.
00:00:55.000 We lost the Bobby Lees there with their song Radiator.
00:00:58.000 What do you say?
00:00:59.000 Radiator or Radiator?
00:01:00.000 Radiator.
00:01:02.000 You say radiator?
00:01:03.000 Radiator!
00:01:04.000 Rad!
00:01:05.000 Oh, I got my wrong glasses on.
00:01:06.000 Hold on.
00:01:07.000 Like Brad!
00:01:08.000 Can I get my glasses from my office, Maddie?
00:01:08.000 Brad!
00:01:09.000 Sure, gotcha.
00:01:11.000 Um... We had our TriCaster crash.
00:01:16.000 We did.
00:01:16.000 We, uh... We're having buffering problems.
00:01:21.000 The Bobby Lees aren't coming out.
00:01:23.000 Don't get your hopes up, folks.
00:01:25.000 This show is gonna suck.
00:01:27.000 But!
00:01:28.000 There is a silver fox providing a silver lining to the show, which is Sylvia.
00:01:37.000 Sylvia's back, folks!
00:01:39.000 I'm back!
00:01:40.000 Woo!
00:01:41.000 She looks like a little embryo there in some sort of Arctic igloo.
00:01:48.000 How are you feeling, my dear?
00:01:49.000 I feel on top of the world!
00:01:52.000 No pain at all?
00:01:53.000 Zero pain?
00:01:54.000 Zero pain!
00:01:56.000 Really?
00:01:57.000 Because you said even like two days ago you still had a bit of pain.
00:02:00.000 Yeah, two days ago I was in pain.
00:02:03.000 When I think about Biden I get into a great deal of pain.
00:02:08.000 Wow.
00:02:09.000 So we haven't seen you in two months because you fell and broke your hip, is that correct?
00:02:14.000 I fractured my hip.
00:02:15.000 Okay.
00:02:17.000 And they didn't give you a new hip, they just what, stitched it up?
00:02:20.000 No, my hip is in one piece.
00:02:22.000 They stapled it back together again?
00:02:23.000 And now you're fine?
00:02:25.000 Yeah, I'm good.
00:02:26.000 Good to go.
00:02:27.000 Well, we're very happy to have you back.
00:02:30.000 And of course, the 50% of Get Off My Lawn Live, Matty O'Dell.
00:02:35.000 What's going on, everybody?
00:02:36.000 Good to see you.
00:02:37.000 I would say Matty O'Dell is 50% of the show.
00:02:39.000 I'm 50% of the show.
00:02:39.000 Ryan is like 10%.
00:02:41.000 And then Sylvia is like 38%.
00:02:42.000 That's over 100%.
00:02:49.000 I do Dr. Jill Biden math.
00:02:51.000 So you know the way this show goes, we do live chats where we send all the money to Max and John.
00:02:57.000 They're gonna get out in less than a year now and when they get out we'd like them to have some scratch.
00:03:02.000 Nice.
00:03:02.000 So I'm hoping to give them like, I'm gonna, I'm committed to spending a hundred grand on
00:03:06.000 Max and John.
00:03:09.000 But I'm going to deduct all the money we've raised.
00:03:11.000 So 100 total.
00:03:12.000 Everything I've paid for lawyers and everything.
00:03:14.000 So I'm guessing I'm up to 50.
00:03:17.000 I want to raise another 50.
00:03:18.000 So that's 25 each over the course of the next year.
00:03:24.000 We also make the first half hour or so live, and then we go behind the paywall.
00:03:31.000 So sponsors pay for this, so everyone in the world can see it for free.
00:03:35.000 We put it on what, Bumble?
00:03:36.000 We put it on Bitshoot, but soon, actually after this episode and going forward, they're all going to be available on Censored TV for free.
00:03:43.000 Oh, right, right, right.
00:03:44.000 Which is weird, because people can't promote it.
00:03:47.000 You can't send a Censored.tv link
00:03:50.000 Because the word itself that the URL itself is banned already starting with the shit show Ryan You should have the QR code here for our live show in Orlando on Saturday June 25th will announce the venue day of People are asking me.
00:04:08.000 Can I go?
00:04:10.000 Wait, does that work?
00:04:11.000 TinyURL.com censored live?
00:04:13.000 Yes.
00:04:14.000 You can make... I didn't know you could do that.
00:04:16.000 You can make it whatever you want to make it.
00:04:18.000 Damn!
00:04:20.000 That's amazing!
00:04:22.000 We make him sound retarded.
00:04:24.000 Well, he doesn't sound not retarded.
00:04:26.000 And then, look at the top left of that screen.
00:04:28.000 You could QR the show.
00:04:30.000 See, the problem with this QR code is...
00:04:33.000 People are watching on their phone, but if you're watching on someone else's phone, maybe your girlfriend can grab the phone.
00:04:38.000 Yeah, get a friend.
00:04:39.000 I saw a letter someone sent from Paris and they go, we are from France and we want to come to Orlando to see your show, but we have a six-month-old.
00:04:48.000 Will he be able to come to the event?
00:04:53.000 Yeah, but don't bring a- what?
00:04:56.000 Don't come.
00:04:56.000 It's gonna be hot.
00:04:59.000 You're bringing- it's hot?
00:05:01.000 I don't know, you don't bring a six-month-old on a plane to go see a fucking show.
00:05:05.000 What are you, bad parents?
00:05:07.000 Plus, he'll grow up racist if he comes to this show.
00:05:10.000 It's true.
00:05:11.000 Hopefully.
00:05:11.000 It starts in the womb.
00:05:13.000 Bigotry starts in the womb.
00:05:15.000 Sylvia, when did you become a racist?
00:05:18.000 A racist?
00:05:19.000 The only thing I ever raced for was potato pancakes.
00:05:24.000 I'm not a racist.
00:05:25.000 I love everyone.
00:05:27.000 I don't care what color you are, what religion.
00:05:28.000 You did marry five blacks.
00:05:31.000 Right?
00:05:32.000 Racist is an ugly disease.
00:05:34.000 It's a disease.
00:05:37.000 A disease of observation.
00:05:40.000 I grew up with everybody.
00:05:42.000 Why can't I hear her very well?
00:05:44.000 Is she coming through the air?
00:05:45.000 I can put her through the speaker.
00:05:46.000 Keep talking, man.
00:05:48.000 Well, she doesn't have to come through the speaker.
00:05:49.000 Well, actually, she does.
00:05:50.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:05:51.000 Go ahead.
00:05:52.000 But she's definitely going on tape, right?
00:05:55.000 Do you mind saying something, hon?
00:05:56.000 Yeah, it was the same issue with Tim the other day.
00:05:58.000 I couldn't.
00:05:58.000 He's slow.
00:06:00.000 Sylvia, count to 10, please.
00:06:04.000 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10!
00:06:10.000 Who put a quarter in you?
00:06:11.000 You really sprung to life.
00:06:12.000 She should be coming through.
00:06:14.000 Yeah.
00:06:15.000 Okay.
00:06:16.000 Also, we are advertising our new awesome shirts.
00:06:21.000 I've been working with the cartoonist who did this for months on these, getting everything perfect.
00:06:26.000 I don't break for queefs.
00:06:29.000 And the great thing about it is, it's elusive.
00:06:31.000 So it's not like people see it and go, oh, there's a gentleman who, while he's fornicating and an air pocket gets caught in his partner's vagina, he doesn't discontinue the intercourse.
00:06:43.000 They just see a truck and they don't get it.
00:06:45.000 It's up to you to explain.
00:06:46.000 And look at this.
00:06:47.000 Bag of Coke.
00:06:49.000 The apostrophe on the don't is a can of bud.
00:06:53.000 We've got a bong floating in the air.
00:06:55.000 There's boobies there.
00:06:56.000 The Rat Fink dude's hat says BM.
00:07:00.000 Baby Monster.
00:07:01.000 Sprockets.
00:07:03.000 Smoke.
00:07:05.000 I think we should make this into posters.
00:07:06.000 It's really good.
00:07:07.000 I wouldn't recommend flying Delta Airlines with it on, though.
00:07:10.000 No.
00:07:12.000 Well, that's just it.
00:07:13.000 The captain wouldn't get it.
00:07:14.000 You're not gonna have some flight attendant going, I queef.
00:07:18.000 You got a problem with our queefs?
00:07:20.000 You don't break for them?
00:07:21.000 Well, that would be good.
00:07:22.000 But it's pro queef.
00:07:23.000 It's like, I don't see your queefs as an issue.
00:07:26.000 Nope.
00:07:27.000 Big Kimmy, the girl I lost my virginity to, she was totally ostracized at our school, Bell's Corners Public School, when we were little kids, because everyone thought she farted.
00:07:39.000 But she was closing her pencil case and was like... Very thick, sort of, whatever you call the zippers.
00:07:47.000 But the things on the zipper, whatever you call those.
00:07:50.000 Teeth.
00:07:50.000 Yeah, the zipper teeth were so big that it went...
00:07:54.000 Nice.
00:07:55.000 Poor Kimmy.
00:07:56.000 She had a rough life.
00:07:57.000 So yeah, the Bobby Lees, to go back to the beginning of the show.
00:08:00.000 A band from Woodstock, New York.
00:08:02.000 Fantastic band in the vein of Black Lips and all those awesome bands.
00:08:08.000 It's amazing to me that there are still new great bands.
00:08:11.000 Like, listen to these guys.
00:08:20.000 It's sort of like painting.
00:08:21.000 Like, how are there still people painting and it's good to look at?
00:08:28.000 She'd make a good wife.
00:08:35.000 I think HR for the Bad Boys.
00:08:41.000 Let's also get down to our sponsors.
00:08:44.000 We're sponsored by Silk City Hot Sauce.
00:08:48.000 We have our own barbecue sauce coming out with Silk City Hot Sauce.
00:08:51.000 My gorgeous face will be on it.
00:08:55.000 Check out their website, LevinskyTopShelf.com.
00:09:00.000 L-E-V-I-N-S-K-Y.
00:09:02.000 Promo code Gavin.
00:09:04.000 The sauce is called G-Sauce.
00:09:06.000 I don't know, how can they have it for sale already?
00:09:08.000 I haven't even sent them a picture of myself looking red.
00:09:12.000 Is that good?
00:09:14.000 Produced by Silk City BBQ and we're going to be giving away some sauce.
00:09:17.000 These guys work directly with a big farm in Southern Vermont.
00:09:20.000 They grow a variety of hot peppers exclusively for them.
00:09:23.000 There's several flavors to choose from.
00:09:25.000 Here's a taste of what you'll see.
00:09:27.000 If you want to pull that up there, Ryan.
00:09:30.000 Erotic Fever.
00:09:32.000 Fire roasted habanero with maple syrup.
00:09:34.000 Killer hot.
00:09:34.000 Now, a lot of people will see erotic fever and they'll think this is a sexual sauce.
00:09:39.000 I should put it on my genitalia when I fornicate.
00:09:41.000 Do not do that.
00:09:43.000 Do not.
00:09:43.000 Warning.
00:09:44.000 Don't try this at home.
00:09:46.000 That's just the name of it.
00:09:47.000 It's called erotic fever.
00:09:49.000 It's not meant to be incorporated into your sexual stuff.
00:09:52.000 It'll burn your genitals.
00:09:53.000 It'll burn your genitals.
00:09:54.000 It can burn a woman's penis.
00:09:56.000 It can burn a man's vagina.
00:09:57.000 That's right.
00:09:57.000 2022 burns.
00:10:00.000 I got 20-22 burns.
00:10:02.000 That's a great rap.
00:10:03.000 Habanero and ghost pepper blend with honey badass Jew.
00:10:07.000 I don't know what that means.
00:10:08.000 That's Aaron Berg's fucking.
00:10:10.000 Oh, Aaron Berg has a sauce with these guys.
00:10:12.000 Yes, and what happens is the hot sauce gets an opportunity and leaves the show.
00:10:17.000 You look like you're four feet tall.
00:10:20.000 Sorry, I ruined your joke.
00:10:21.000 I said, the hot sauce finds a better opportunity than leaves your house.
00:10:25.000 Oh, okay.
00:10:25.000 I'm just kidding.
00:10:26.000 Nobody knows who Aaron Berg is, Ryan.
00:10:28.000 Aaron Berg recently left his show with Gino Bisconti on Compound Media, which is Anthony Cumia of Opium Anthony's network.
00:10:36.000 Anthony, I mean, Gina was very upset.
00:10:38.000 I don't know if you saw, but because apparently Aaron has a clean bill of health, but before he said, I'm leaving the show, big reason, open heart surgery.
00:10:48.000 And then Gina was like, nobody recovers that fast, blah, blah, blah.
00:10:52.000 Yeah, he was really mad.
00:10:53.000 Aaron implied he was dying.
00:10:54.000 Yeah, he was like, I prayed for him.
00:10:56.000 So there's drums there and you could watch Gavin.
00:10:59.000 That's a shitty thing to do, but I have an announcement to make.
00:11:01.000 I'm getting open heart surgery.
00:11:03.000 Are you serious?
00:11:05.000 Best case scenario was stint, probably open heart surgery.
00:11:09.000 And I talked to the doctor there and I said, what do we do?
00:11:13.000 He goes, you need a heart transplant.
00:11:15.000 And I said, what the fuck?
00:11:16.000 So I go on a waiting list?
00:11:17.000 And he goes, yes.
00:11:18.000 And I go, my friend Matty's on a waiting list.
00:11:20.000 And he goes, yeah, and he showed me the list.
00:11:22.000 Dude.
00:11:22.000 Nice.
00:11:22.000 No!
00:11:22.000 That's not nice, Matty.
00:11:39.000 Right, right.
00:11:40.000 Provide my own.
00:11:41.000 No questions asked.
00:11:43.000 He just looked at me like, I was like, I was just saying.
00:11:46.000 Totally hypothetically.
00:11:48.000 B-Y-O-H.
00:11:50.000 Do we do that here?
00:11:52.000 Dude, I feel like I'm making veteran jokes, like false valor in front of a real veteran here.
00:11:58.000 When it comes to heart stuff.
00:12:00.000 You didn't make a heart joke.
00:12:01.000 I did.
00:12:01.000 OK, that's true.
00:12:03.000 You're not good at life and thinking and existence and air and water.
00:12:09.000 As long as he's not mad at me.
00:12:26.000 The raspberry habanero sauce, hot syrup, that's hot pepper infused, apple cider, maple syrup, and their brand new Bloody Mary cocktail mixture, Silk City.
00:12:36.000 It's made in small batches with high quality ingredients.
00:12:39.000 The proof is in the sauce.
00:12:40.000 Go to silky, sorry, silkcityhotsauce.com and use promo code Gavin for 15% off Silk City.
00:12:48.000 We'll also throw in a free bottle of hot sauce with every order, save when you buy a three or six mix pack.
00:12:55.000 Look out for my g-sauce, it's coming hard.
00:12:58.000 Levinsky.
00:12:59.000 Sort of like Monica Lewinsky, but with a V. Levinsky.
00:13:03.000 Top shelf.
00:13:05.000 Right?
00:13:05.000 The best booze in the bar.
00:13:07.000 Dot com.
00:13:07.000 Promo code Gavin.
00:13:09.000 And don't forget, this applies to all orders.
00:13:12.000 Now, the thing I always say about our sponsors is, these guys get flack, Antifa harasses them, they get threatened all the time for promoting this show, for sponsoring this show.
00:13:25.000 You need hot sauce.
00:13:26.000 You need it on your eggs.
00:13:28.000 You need it in your Bloody Mary.
00:13:29.000 So why not get the hot sauce from the guys who have the balls to support free speech?
00:13:35.000 Same with the coffee.
00:13:36.000 Same with every other necessity in your house.
00:13:39.000 Like I said before, I met an optometrist who was MAGA in the city.
00:13:44.000 Old mob dude.
00:13:45.000 I'm like, well now I got my guy.
00:13:46.000 I gotta get glasses.
00:13:48.000 So I'm gonna get them from this guy.
00:13:49.000 Get your hot sauce from these guys.
00:13:52.000 They are... What did Biden say today?
00:13:54.000 Ultra MAGA?
00:13:56.000 Yeah.
00:13:56.000 And he called Trump the MAGA King.
00:14:00.000 Thank you!
00:14:00.000 Did he say King MAGA?
00:14:03.000 These insults are getting more and more true as his presidency goes on.
00:14:08.000 Like he said, these guys are going to try to take inflation and I know your anger about inflation.
00:14:16.000 He goes, I can taste it.
00:14:18.000 Yeah.
00:14:19.000 What?
00:14:20.000 You can taste my anger at inflation?
00:14:25.000 I don't recall sending many bodily fluids your way.
00:14:28.000 But he goes, he says,
00:14:31.000 These mega parties are going to take that anger and the inflation that I can taste and they're going to try to mobilize that anger and make it, you know, show up at the polls.
00:14:42.000 Make it affect your vote.
00:14:44.000 And I'm like, yeah.
00:14:46.000 That's exactly what we want to do.
00:14:47.000 And there's nothing smart about you, Joe.
00:14:49.000 That's what democracy is.
00:14:51.000 Yeah.
00:14:51.000 When you fuck up and inflation gets too high, people try to vote you out.
00:14:55.000 Yeah.
00:14:56.000 That's the deal.
00:14:56.000 These people are going to trick you.
00:14:58.000 They're going to try to say that because I'm doing a bad job, then I should go.
00:15:03.000 That's not how it works.
00:15:05.000 Never mind the fact that I suck.
00:15:06.000 I should get a reward.
00:15:09.000 I got a bone to pick with Fox News.
00:15:12.000 Years ago, if a reporter or journalist had a different view of the news than Fox News, it was okay, they'd let it slide.
00:15:23.000 Nowadays, you've got a different view of the news on Fox News, and some of the other news channels, they fire you.
00:15:31.000 What the heck ever happened to free speech?
00:15:34.000 It's being murdered in this country.
00:15:38.000 Well, even Tucker Carlson, who I consider one step down from Jesus Christ, he won't go near Dinesh D'Souza's 2000 Mules thing.
00:15:49.000 Same with Newsmax.
00:15:50.000 They won't go near, and I think it might be because Dominion is so litigious, but Newsmax, Tucker Carlson will not go near Dinesh D'Souza's new movie 2000 Mules.
00:16:04.000 Which I have yet to see.
00:16:05.000 You know, everybody talks like they've got something to say, but nothing comes out when they move their lips.
00:16:10.000 Just a bunch of gibberish.
00:16:13.000 They act like they forgot about Dre.
00:16:18.000 Donald, you plagiarized that.
00:16:21.000 What do you mean?
00:16:22.000 You didn't make that up.
00:16:24.000 It's a rap.
00:16:24.000 You just said a rap lyric like you made it up.
00:16:27.000 Said a rap lyric?
00:16:28.000 That doesn't sound familiar to me, but what does is that you guys forgot about Dre.
00:16:33.000 Really, in a big way.
00:16:34.000 If you look at it, you've forgotten about Dre.
00:16:37.000 A man might sue you.
00:16:41.000 I think Dre's gay, by the way.
00:16:42.000 Yeah, I've heard that.
00:16:43.000 That's clear, right?
00:16:44.000 Why are you wearing a Yankees hat on a Mets show?
00:16:46.000 Well, I'm glad you asked.
00:16:47.000 Tomorrow, my first concert at Madison Square Garden will be Limp Bizkit's.
00:16:53.000 Yeah!
00:16:53.000 So I'm wearing the red hat.
00:16:55.000 I got it today.
00:16:56.000 Are Limp Bizkit Yankees fans?
00:16:59.000 But that was just, I don't know.
00:17:00.000 That's a good question, but he wore this hat.
00:17:02.000 The Yankees hat.
00:17:04.000 So I don't think he's from New York.
00:17:05.000 Are you sure it was a Yankees hat?
00:17:06.000 His hat was backwards.
00:17:07.000 No one ever saw what was on the front of his.
00:17:09.000 Oh, it was a Yanker.
00:17:10.000 It was a Yanker.
00:17:11.000 So you're going to see Limp Bizkit.
00:17:13.000 Who else is going to be there?
00:17:13.000 Jane's Addiction?
00:17:15.000 No, no.
00:17:16.000 Maybe it's a whole festival.
00:17:17.000 What do you got?
00:17:17.000 Early Janes, Late Chains, Peppers and Rage?
00:17:20.000 No, no, just Limp Bizkit.
00:17:22.000 And maybe an opening act.
00:17:26.000 Bam.
00:17:27.000 Boom.
00:17:28.000 Yankee hat!
00:17:29.000 It was backwards, but he's got it forward sometimes.
00:17:31.000 Limp Bizkit really got blamed for that 99 Woodstock rape festival where it was just fucking absolute chaos.
00:17:40.000 Yeah, when they played break stuff.
00:17:42.000 Yeah, give me something to break.
00:17:43.000 Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:17:44.000 And then they had bonfires.
00:17:46.000 My wife was watching a documentary about that Woodstock.
00:17:48.000 I kind of had forgotten about it.
00:17:50.000 You know that the Porta Potties all overflowed, so when you see those people dancing around in mud, it's shit mud.
00:17:57.000 My mom went there for one day.
00:17:58.000 I tried to like ask her about it right after we had watched that documentary.
00:18:01.000 Oh my god, you're so young that your mother was at 99 Woodstock.
00:18:05.000 Yes.
00:18:06.000 Not the old one.
00:18:07.000 She was too unborn to go to the first one.
00:18:08.000 The second one was 94, I believe.
00:18:11.000 So when were you born?
00:18:12.000 Wait, she might have went to 92 or 94?
00:18:16.000 When were you born, Ryan?
00:18:18.000 1989.
00:18:18.000 The Year of Our Lord.
00:18:19.000 No, that's called the Year of the Fag, at least with the Chinese calendar.
00:18:22.000 That's not true.
00:18:23.000 Yeah, it is.
00:18:24.000 It's like a... I know, but... The character is like that.
00:18:26.000 I don't like to promote it.
00:18:28.000 It's a Chinese symbol that looks like a limp wrist.
00:18:30.000 I know.
00:18:31.000 Limp wristket.
00:18:34.000 Really, I really hope I didn't, huh?
00:18:36.000 Didn't you call them that like one minute ago?
00:18:38.000 No, I'm Limp Biscuit because I'm a fag wearing their hat and they're Limp Biscuit because they're rad and they rule.
00:18:45.000 I made my own insult, essentially.
00:18:48.000 I made my own insult from scratch.
00:18:50.000 Homemade insults.
00:18:54.000 So yeah, we get the Super Chats where we give the money to Max and John.
00:18:59.000 We, I don't know how much money we've raised so far, maybe two grand or so?
00:19:03.000 We've got, we have a year to get to 25, to 50 really.
00:19:07.000 Uh, 25 each.
00:19:08.000 And then we take phone calls and we talk to you.
00:19:12.000 And then we also take, wow, that's, it's like an AMSR.
00:19:18.000 AMSR?
00:19:19.000 AMSR with Sylvia.
00:19:20.000 ASMR, sorry.
00:19:21.000 Sylvia taking off her coat, you can hear every molecule cause she's sitting on the mic.
00:19:27.000 Hey Sylvia, if you're gonna fart, make sure you fart on the mic so we hear it.
00:19:31.000 We need it, yes.
00:19:31.000 No, that's not allowed.
00:19:33.000 Jewish women don't fart.
00:19:35.000 Only Goyish girls fart.
00:19:38.000 Do you?
00:19:39.000 So you never fart?
00:19:40.000 Never.
00:19:41.000 That's unconstitutional.
00:19:44.000 I just realized, and this has nothing to do with Jewish or Goyim, I just realized I've never heard an old person fart.
00:19:50.000 Go to an old age home or a nursing home.
00:19:52.000 I'm sure they fart like crazy.
00:19:53.000 That's why that kid stuck him there.
00:20:05.000 Will you ever end up in a nursing home?
00:20:07.000 Me, never.
00:20:08.000 I'd rather commit suicide.
00:20:11.000 But when your hip was being repaired, you weren't just in the hospital the entire time.
00:20:15.000 I was in a hospital, not a nursing home.
00:20:17.000 The whole time it was a hospital.
00:20:19.000 You were in a hospital for two months?
00:20:21.000 I was a month in the hospital, then a month in rehab.
00:20:26.000 And where was the rehab?
00:20:27.000 That's a hospital.
00:20:29.000 Jewish Sarah Newman Rehab, where they have physical therapy.
00:20:36.000 They also have nursing homes.
00:20:38.000 Once you're in a nursing home, you can't get out.
00:20:41.000 So, the Sarah Newman thing is a hospital?
00:20:44.000 Sarah Newman is not a hospital.
00:20:47.000 It's a rehab.
00:20:48.000 Rehabilitation, like if you have an accident?
00:20:50.000 Okay, so it's not called a hospital and it's not a nursing home.
00:20:53.000 No, it's not a hospital.
00:20:54.000 Because our good friend Joe Tonelli, a scam artist who grew up in New Rochelle, the Marinac area, and pretended to be a nurse for many years.
00:21:06.000 If you look him up you can see plenty of warnings, people saying don't trust this guy.
00:21:10.000 He has been in an old folks home.
00:21:13.000 That's a nursing room.
00:21:16.000 I think because he was on Medicaid, they didn't want to keep paying for a room in the actual hospital.
00:21:23.000 So that's the same way that all those old people got COVID, because there's some sort of paperwork somewhere that says, save money, stick them in an old folks home.
00:21:32.000 And Como got away with it.
00:21:37.000 I didn't prosecute him because of that.
00:21:40.000 He didn't go to jail but his reputation is mud and we're never going to see him again.
00:21:45.000 What did they say?
00:21:46.000 Lady Justice is blind.
00:21:50.000 Can you focus on Sylvia a little bit better here on today's shit show?
00:21:54.000 Do I focus on what?
00:21:57.000 The camera, you seem a little blurry.
00:21:59.000 Oh, she's punched in a lot, but let me see if I could... I'm very upset with what's going down in this world.
00:22:06.000 Be more specific.
00:22:07.000 It's not the world I grew up in.
00:22:11.000 In what sense?
00:22:13.000 The world I grew up in, there was justice.
00:22:16.000 There was respect for your elders.
00:22:19.000 There was respect for knowledge and education.
00:22:25.000 Kids when they grew up they knew they had to work for a living.
00:22:29.000 They didn't feel life owed them something.
00:22:31.000 They didn't go around with a chip on their shoulder.
00:22:34.000 They didn't do drugs.
00:22:36.000 The most they did to get high was drink beer in the schoolyard.
00:22:41.000 Now everyone talks these days about how racist everything is and how America hasn't progressed since the 50s and blah blah blah.
00:22:47.000 When you think of like South Bronx in the 60s and 70s, were we over, maybe not the 60s, but in the 70s in New York City, like did people talk about racism this much?
00:22:58.000 No, the 70s was great.
00:23:01.000 Everybody got along good.
00:23:02.000 There was no friggin' racism.
00:23:05.000 The only thing that I remember in the 60s, they started with black power, white power.
00:23:11.000 That's pure bullshit.
00:23:14.000 You know?
00:23:15.000 That's racist.
00:23:18.000 We're all the same.
00:23:20.000 People don't want to admit it.
00:23:21.000 We're all the same.
00:23:23.000 We're all made the same way.
00:23:27.000 One is not better than the other.
00:23:28.000 You might be smarter than the other.
00:23:31.000 You might have native intelligence, but nobody's better than somebody else.
00:23:37.000 If you think you do, you're digging a deep ditch for yourself.
00:23:41.000 You're going to wind up at the short end of the stick.
00:23:44.000 Little do you know.
00:23:47.000 Either that or hang out with people who are Democrats, like Biden.
00:23:54.000 There you go.
00:23:55.000 BeardVet is a veteran-owned company.
00:23:58.000 Stay warm and caffeinated with BeardVet coffee and stay looking great with BeardVet grooming equipment.
00:24:03.000 So there seems to be two main focuses with our sponsor BeardVet.
00:24:07.000 This vet-owned, badass dudes who sell beard grooming products and coffee.
00:24:14.000 And again, you're buying coffee, so why don't you get it from our sponsors?
00:24:19.000 What?
00:24:20.000 This background is wrong, Shitshow.
00:24:22.000 That's my new nickname for you, Shitshow.
00:24:23.000 That's pretty good.
00:24:30.000 Sean, the owner of BeardVet is one of us.
00:24:58.000 And again, they are veteran owned and operator.
00:25:00.000 BeardVet stands for the National Anthem, but they kneel to the cross.
00:25:05.000 Did I say owned and operated?
00:25:06.000 Am I turning into Joe Biden where words just become a series of vowels?
00:25:11.000 Owned and operated.
00:25:12.000 Share your contributions to help our brothers and sisters in uniform.
00:25:17.000 We support them, they support us.
00:25:19.000 Treat yourselves with excellent coffee and grooming gear.
00:25:23.000 Beardvet.com.
00:25:25.000 Promo code Gavin.
00:25:26.000 15% off.
00:25:27.000 It's not a joke.
00:25:32.000 It's not a joke.
00:25:33.000 I can taste it.
00:25:34.000 You know what I feel like is hard?
00:25:35.000 Like coming up with an actual, accurate, Joe Biden, accurate Bidenism.
00:25:40.000 Like it would be like, you know, you get the soldiers out there, man.
00:25:43.000 One time, salute, salute under the hot sun, right?
00:25:48.000 Salute under the hot sun, everybody.
00:25:49.000 It's not a joke.
00:25:50.000 They're ordered arms.
00:25:51.000 Yeah, you're right.
00:25:52.000 Because the shit that comes out of his mouth is so alarmingly random.
00:25:56.000 Like when he was talking to those people in that, in yesterday's episode, or sorry, Tuesday's episode where he goes,
00:26:02.000 It's hard to come up with a true fucking Bidenism.
00:26:02.000 I don't know.
00:26:04.000 I think I got close.
00:26:05.000 Like I could taste it?
00:26:06.000 I never would have come up with that.
00:26:07.000 No.
00:26:17.000 Caller 1 and Caller 2 tonight are getting a free gift pack from Sean and the BeardVet team.
00:26:22.000 Right.
00:26:23.000 Thank you, BeardVet.
00:26:25.000 Now, we did Need of Fashions last week, right?
00:26:28.000 Did we do them every second week?
00:26:29.000 I don't recall that we did, honestly, to be fair.
00:26:32.000 OK.
00:26:33.000 Well, we might go past the half hour mark and indulge.
00:26:39.000 How have you been doing, Matty?
00:26:41.000 I'm alright, can't complain.
00:26:42.000 So today we saw you make toast.
00:26:45.000 Yeah, that was the episode that dropped today.
00:26:47.000 That was a viewer request.
00:26:49.000 Miles M wrote that in.
00:26:52.000 So we gotta please the baby monsters.
00:26:54.000 And why did you choose margarine instead of butter?
00:26:57.000 Because if you're gonna request toasts, you're gonna get nothing but the best.
00:27:02.000 Yeah, you're not a gourmand if you're just asking how to make toast.
00:27:05.000 White wonder bread and margarine.
00:27:08.000 You know what I had in Nashville?
00:27:10.000 There was a fried bologna sandwich, and I was like, I've never had that before, I'll try it.
00:27:14.000 And I got it, and it's just a BLT, but instead of B, it's fried bologna.
00:27:19.000 Dude, it was heaven on earth.
00:27:22.000 Especially on a night out drinking,
00:27:24.000 Were you like, I want salty, but I don't want to pig out, but I'd like a little oomph?
00:27:29.000 I've had a few fried bologna sandwiches.
00:27:32.000 Was it a BLT?
00:27:33.000 No, it was just bologna, cheese.
00:27:37.000 Well, when we were inside, it was just like a slice of bologna and meat and bread.
00:27:44.000 That's in the microwave.
00:27:47.000 It's a popular dish in receiving.
00:27:50.000 Maddie and I have both done time.
00:27:52.000 No need to get into the specifics of how much.
00:27:54.000 I don't think that's important.
00:27:56.000 Definitely not.
00:27:57.000 No.
00:27:58.000 That's a pissing contest.
00:28:00.000 Yeah.
00:28:00.000 That's petty.
00:28:02.000 Now that's how guys talk to one another.
00:28:03.000 What matters is that we're both ex-cons.
00:28:06.000 I found a rarity in the supermarket.
00:28:09.000 They stopped selling it.
00:28:11.000 Maybe they're racist.
00:28:13.000 I don't know.
00:28:14.000 Hebrew National Salami.
00:28:16.000 Now Genoa Italian Salami is great, but Hebrew National Jewish Salami puts it to shame.
00:28:25.000 It is dynamite.
00:28:27.000 And it was gone.
00:28:27.000 You can make it on Jewish rye bread, or you could slice it up and make an omelet.
00:28:34.000 It is great.
00:28:36.000 And you couldn't find it?
00:28:38.000 I found it.
00:28:38.000 Most stores don't have it anymore.
00:28:40.000 Very hard to find.
00:28:58.000 About an hour three different stores.
00:29:00.000 Just trying to find beans.
00:29:01.000 Yeah, cowboy beans England beans now as far as exotic Japanese beans and all kinds of fucking Hispanic beans.
00:29:11.000 Oh my god.
00:29:11.000 There's entire sections of the grocery store, but the original white beans gone Hand-cut fries done erased from society
00:29:22.000 Dude, they've been making things smaller.
00:29:23.000 We should start marching around grocery stores with tiki torches saying you will not replace us.
00:29:28.000 Did you notice everything is smaller now like it comes in like smaller packaging?
00:29:32.000 I noticed that with Hot Pockets there's just two in a box.
00:29:35.000 I've noticed that with co-hosts where the guy will be like five foot seven and he'll be dressed like Hans and Franz pump you up.
00:29:45.000 That was pretty funny.
00:29:47.000 What are you?
00:29:49.000 You know what you look like with your shirt tucked into your sweatpants?
00:29:53.000 You look like the most shit-together guy at the mental institution.
00:29:57.000 Where you're like, I'll help.
00:29:58.000 Don't worry, I'll clean it up.
00:30:00.000 And you like, you volunteer.
00:30:01.000 I mean, you're blurry, obviously.
00:30:04.000 The base of your microphone shaft is perfectly crisp, but everything else is blurry.
00:30:09.000 And you look like the guy who, some of the, whatever you call them, interns, the guys who work at the mental institution, they're like, why is he even here?
00:30:16.000 Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:30:17.000 He seems like he has it together.
00:30:19.000 The orderlies?
00:30:20.000 Then you like start losing it.
00:30:21.000 He looks like a bouncer.
00:30:23.000 He like beats the shit out of a fridge.
00:30:24.000 He looks like a bouncer.
00:30:26.000 Thank you.
00:30:28.000 A bouncer at fuckin' Willy Wonka's Chocolate Factory, maybe.
00:30:31.000 Hey, uh, excuse me, Veruca?
00:30:33.000 Look at those muscles on his arms!
00:30:35.000 Mrs. Salt, Ms.
00:30:36.000 Veruca?
00:30:37.000 Uh, you cannot have whatever you want, and you cannot buy an Oompa Loompa.
00:30:41.000 So, you're outta here.
00:30:44.000 Okay, so, it's the half hour mark, um... Sometimes I feel like we should allow the freeloaders just to take a dip.
00:30:51.000 You wanna give them the whole thing?
00:30:53.000 What do you mean, the whole first hour?
00:30:55.000 Yeah.
00:30:56.000 No suck my balls dry.
00:30:58.000 You know I had sex with my wife this morning and we did it in the living room where there's a bookshelf and I started reading the titles to buy myself time.
00:31:07.000 Nice.
00:31:08.000 But from her perspective it must have been weird because it started out like oh yeah because it's been a while.
00:31:15.000 The barber, my barber was like, you people that are married, you get, you have pizza every night.
00:31:20.000 I get pizza one night, burger one night, I get steak one night, I have different, all my bitches, I mix it up.
00:31:26.000 I'm like, dude, I don't get pizza every night.
00:31:29.000 When I get pizza, I devour it, because it's the only food and it's rare.
00:31:32.000 I'm in a desert.
00:31:33.000 Anyway.
00:31:34.000 I don't even get pizza Friday, shit, I get pizza August.
00:31:39.000 That was funny.
00:31:40.000 I know, I'm just being cool.
00:31:43.000 So the beginning I'm like, oh yeah, oh fuck, feels so good.
00:31:47.000 Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:31:48.000 And then I look over the bookshelf and start my new technique.
00:31:51.000 So all of a sudden it goes from like, oh yeah, oh, to...
00:31:57.000 And I'm just reading.
00:31:58.000 But it worked.
00:32:00.000 I think it bought me 30 seconds.
00:32:01.000 Nice.
00:32:03.000 Maybe even a minute.
00:32:05.000 Which in 20 years marriage years is an hour.
00:32:11.000 In eternity.
00:32:12.000 At my age you're trying to get from like 5-7 minutes up to 11 minutes.
00:32:20.000 Eleven.
00:32:21.000 Eleven?
00:32:22.000 No, you're young.
00:32:23.000 That's baloney.
00:32:25.000 You gotta try new techniques and you'll go for a whole hour non-stop.
00:32:32.000 Just pounding for an hour?
00:32:35.000 It's more than pounding.
00:32:38.000 You gotta try new ways.
00:32:41.000 I say I gotta teach you all over again.
00:32:44.000 Tell me a technique then.
00:32:46.000 Like tell me how to fuck.
00:32:48.000 What do I do?
00:32:53.000 You play her like a piano.
00:32:55.000 First you suck her toes.
00:32:58.000 Then you take your dick and put it by her tit and rub her nipple.
00:32:58.000 Oh shit.
00:33:03.000 Okay.
00:33:04.000 I've never played a piano like that before.
00:33:06.000 What song is that?
00:33:08.000 Then you pretend her belly button is her cunt and you just caress it.
00:33:14.000 Then you take your dick by her ear and you rub it.
00:33:18.000 What?
00:33:19.000 Then you take your dick by her throat and you caress it.
00:33:23.000 Then she's all wet and dying for you and then you shove it in nice and gentle and slow.
00:33:34.000 And how long after that is the pumping going on for?
00:33:38.000 For as long as you and her want it.
00:33:42.000 It'll be way more than 11 minutes, guaranteed.
00:33:46.000 Well, you marry mostly blacks.
00:33:48.000 No, I married any man I loved.
00:33:51.000 Color had nothing to do with it.
00:33:53.000 I understand, but your sexual experience has been, out of seven husbands, five have been... I had over a hundred men in bed before I got married, baby.
00:34:02.000 I had Arabs.
00:34:04.000 I had Iranians.
00:34:08.000 Who are the best lovers, from the top down?
00:34:12.000 Latino men.
00:34:14.000 Latino and black.
00:34:16.000 Latino and black.
00:34:18.000 You know why?
00:34:19.000 They're not like white boys.
00:34:21.000 They don't have any inhibitions and they'll do anything and everything to please you.
00:34:27.000 Or to please themselves.
00:34:32.000 No comment.
00:34:39.000 Perfect smile.
00:34:41.000 Can somebody edit that where she says it's like playing a piano and it's like, first you gotta suck the balls and then... And then every time, toes.
00:34:41.000 There you go.
00:34:53.000 Before we go to start taking calls, I want to say a shout out to
00:34:58.000 Our oldest sponsor, as far as being there from day one, which is Nita Fashions.
00:35:03.000 I don't usually wear t-shirts on this show, but Thursday nights we want to promote our awesome merch.
00:35:09.000 But every time you see me wearing a suit, I'm wearing a Nita Fashion suit.
00:35:13.000 I heard they have a Get Off My Lawn lining now.
00:35:16.000 I can't believe they didn't tell me this.
00:35:18.000 It says never stop fighting.
00:35:18.000 Word.
00:35:20.000 In the lining.
00:35:22.000 And they live in Hong Kong.
00:35:23.000 They're Indian dudes.
00:35:25.000 Dot, not feather.
00:35:26.000 And I'm like, OK, you guys sure you want to get behind this show that much?
00:35:30.000 Like a lot of businesses get canceled and they're like, we don't give a fuck, buddy.
00:35:35.000 They don't swear.
00:35:36.000 They're very, very prim and proper.
00:35:38.000 They don't say buddy tailors.
00:35:40.000 But they were like, you we get to get off my lawn sensor TV client every day.
00:35:46.000 We are loving it.
00:35:47.000 Let me tell you.
00:35:50.000 So yeah, I call it the tailor for cheap, rich people.
00:35:56.000 You go there, you get a suit for $800, you get a shirt for $50.
00:36:01.000 It's perfectly tailored to you.
00:36:03.000 It feels like pajamas.
00:36:04.000 You've never lived until you've worn a suit that was made specifically for your exact body shape.
00:36:10.000 It's awesome.
00:36:11.000 If you get drunk, you end up passing out in it.
00:36:14.000 Because you're so fucking comfortable.
00:36:16.000 In the summer, going to meetings, you're so comfortable every day.
00:36:20.000 So the way to set this up is they do sort of world tours, and I mean literally world tours, where you go there.
00:36:26.000 They were just in New York and you go there and they have all these swatches and you get set up.
00:36:30.000 But the next one won't be for a while, I don't think.
00:36:33.000 They're still on it now.
00:36:34.000 I'm not sure where they are.
00:36:36.000 But you contact them.
00:36:38.000 Instagram seems to be the most popular way for our viewers.
00:36:41.000 You DM them.
00:36:42.000 You set up a meeting.
00:36:43.000 Your girlfriend has a measuring tape.
00:36:46.000 She measures your neck and everything, your waist, your inseam.
00:36:49.000 And then you pick various, uh, they can send you swatches or you can just do it by sight.
00:36:54.000 And then a suit just arrives.
00:36:55.000 FedEx.
00:36:56.000 Here you go, sir.
00:36:59.000 It's much better than when they meet you and you get to feel the swatches and everything.
00:37:02.000 And the fun part too is that sort of pampering you get when they show up at the hotel in your town and you go there and choose all the fabrics and stuff.
00:37:13.000 It's awesome.
00:37:14.000 And I know if you work construction or something, you don't need 10 suits, but you have funerals, you have weddings, you need at least one suit that fits you perfectly.
00:37:23.000 Do it for your wedding.
00:37:24.000 That's smart.
00:37:25.000 So yeah, go to NitaFashions.
00:37:27.000 What's the actual URL, Ryan?
00:37:29.000 It's NitaFashions.com.
00:37:31.000 Once again, that is NitaFashions.com.
00:37:33.000 That is Nita, N-I-T-A, NitaFashions.com.
00:37:39.000 All right, let's start the mailbag.
00:37:41.000 We'll read one letter and then we will disappear behind the paywall.
00:37:46.000 Sound good.
00:37:46.000 Sound good?
00:37:48.000 Ryan, shut up, you don't have a dad.
00:37:53.000 Let's turn our eyes to Gavin's mailbag.
00:37:59.000 Let me touch it.
00:38:02.000 Oh fuck, we have FOP Medals and Johnny Apple too?
00:38:06.000 We do.
00:38:07.000 That's five sponsors.
00:38:09.000 That seems a little heavy.
00:38:10.000 So maybe we'll have to do the whole first hour free.
00:38:13.000 That means we're popular.
00:38:14.000 So we had a problem with the letters.
00:38:17.000 We were getting too many.
00:38:18.000 I was getting 100 a day and they're all gold.
00:38:21.000 And I thought, well we'll have Ryan do Celebrity Mailbag.
00:38:23.000 That will eat it up.
00:38:24.000 But that only eats up like 20.
00:38:27.000 And then I realized the solution to the problem.
00:38:29.000 Become the ultimate male snob.
00:38:33.000 So now if your letter is not the greatest thing I've ever read and it doesn't deserve the Poet Laureate Award, I just turf it.
00:38:41.000 Bye-bye.
00:38:42.000 Bye-bye!
00:38:44.000 Home to mommy.
00:38:45.000 I'm outta here, bye.
00:38:48.000 You should have the background that's for Thursday Night Live, shitshow.
00:38:53.000 This guy?
00:38:54.000 Yeah, the one that incorporates mail, calls, and everything.
00:38:57.000 True.
00:38:59.000 Okay, I have to say off the bat here, out of the gate, I got a thousand letters telling me to fuck off because I laughed at Ryan for saying cutlery can rust.
00:39:10.000 Of course.
00:39:12.000 A shocking amount of letters saying that.
00:39:14.000 I still am on my side.
00:39:14.000 Yes.
00:39:19.000 When was the last time you looked at your sink and you went, oh damn it.
00:39:22.000 I left these forks here too long.
00:39:23.000 They're all rusty.
00:39:26.000 Now I understand there might be some $900 Japanese knife that's not supposed to get wet for more than a minute.
00:39:31.000 No one has those.
00:39:33.000 I got a shun.
00:39:33.000 300 bucks.
00:39:35.000 No one has a shun.
00:39:36.000 A lot of people have a shun.
00:39:38.000 No one has a shun.
00:39:39.000 I shun you.
00:39:40.000 People have a shun.
00:39:42.000 I've shun it myself.
00:39:44.000 Matty, can cutlery rust?
00:39:48.000 I've never particularly seen it myself.
00:39:51.000 No!
00:39:52.000 But I don't leave dishes in the sink for long.
00:39:54.000 There you go.
00:39:55.000 Well, that's my thing.
00:39:57.000 I leave shit in the sink for like a couple days.
00:39:59.000 I've never seen any rust on them.
00:40:02.000 Anyway, here's one of the only letters we got that didn't tell me to fuck off and didn't say Ryan is awesome.
00:40:09.000 So it's the one I'm focusing on, clearly.
00:40:11.000 And it says, Detective Shitty on kitchen knives.
00:40:15.000 Stainless steel is almost impossible to rust in a lifetime.
00:40:19.000 Unless your water is one on the pH scale, you're fine.
00:40:24.000 And then he sends a link, Wusthof.
00:40:26.000 Wusthof, they're German knives.
00:40:28.000 The person who trained me about knife work and stuff like that, he had a Wusthof.
00:40:32.000 Knife work?
00:40:33.000 What do you mean?
00:40:33.000 When you worked at that sushi place?
00:40:34.000 No, no, no.
00:40:35.000 I worked at a high-end, like a winery.
00:40:38.000 Very nice winery up in Warwick.
00:40:41.000 And they had an amazing kitchen.
00:40:44.000 I worked in that kitchen.
00:40:45.000 Why do you sound like you're at gunpoint right now?
00:40:48.000 I really wish I could cut to me and then there's like a gun there, but it's just me.
00:40:55.000 Jason Jones and Samantha Bee.
00:40:58.000 Family friends.
00:40:59.000 They were our neighbors upstate.
00:41:03.000 Gavin, I'll get the ass slapping over with now and say big fan blah blah blah.
00:41:07.000 I'm writing you because I recently watched a show that aired from 2016 to 2019 called The Detour.
00:41:13.000 Your old pals Jason Jones and Samantha Bee wrote it.
00:41:15.000 I thought it would be woke, but it actually pokes fun at both sides.
00:41:18.000 That's rare, especially for that time frame.
00:41:20.000 Makes me wonder if they both have come more to the center.
00:41:24.000 Anyways, thought you might want to check it out.
00:41:26.000 Yeah, I used to hang out with Jason Jones.
00:41:28.000 You know, we'd get a drink every couple months and he knew I was a righty and he was clearly a lefty, but uh...
00:41:37.000 It was normal.
00:41:38.000 This was back pre-Trump, where you could talk to the other side, and they'd roll their eyes, and you rolled your eyes.
00:41:45.000 I always found, though, back when I had liberal friends, it wasn't both of us rolling our eyes.
00:41:50.000 It was them rolling their eyes at me, because I didn't think that fucking Snow was racist, and then me going, how can you possibly think that blah blah blah?
00:42:03.000 And I'm still there now.
00:42:06.000 Like with Biden.
00:42:07.000 Oh wow, that was a good fuckin' stunt.
00:42:11.000 With Biden, I'm just like, how can you, a friend of mine in Tacoma was a lawyer and he's a liberal and he's like, about a month ago I said, what would you give Biden?
00:42:21.000 And he goes, B minus.
00:42:25.000 I'm not even mad at that, I'm just confused.
00:42:29.000 I understand homosexuality more than I understand liking Biden.
00:42:34.000 I haven't spoken to him since, and not because I'm mad, but I've been meaning to call him, but like, it's gotta be a D right now.
00:42:42.000 Minimum.
00:42:43.000 I think Biden would give Biden a D. Biden is not blown away by Biden.
00:42:47.000 Didn't he say something about that too, that he wasn't doing so good, or?
00:42:50.000 Yeah, he said, I'm the shittiest president.
00:42:52.000 In the world.
00:42:53.000 In the history of America.
00:42:55.000 Let's call my mom.
00:42:57.000 Let's see what she thinks.
00:42:58.000 She hasn't spoken to me since I, uh, missed Mother's Day.
00:43:02.000 Even though I didn't miss Mother's Day, she forgot to check her messages.
00:43:05.000 Now guys, for everybody who doesn't know, if you're watching for the first time, you go to the site, censored.tv, and on the... Under the live page, you can donate to read a message on air.
00:43:19.000 That's right, you go to the live stream, and, uh, underneath the player... Who's that handsome guy?
00:43:29.000 I'm calling my mom, Sylvia.
00:43:29.000 And you can see your message.
00:43:31.000 I hear that.
00:43:32.000 It's about time.
00:43:33.000 Get on it.
00:43:37.000 Someone's asking about your dog.
00:43:38.000 Tinkerbell?
00:43:41.000 Sylvia, is Tinkerbell... Hi, Mom!
00:43:44.000 Hi!
00:43:45.000 How are you, Looney Tunes?
00:43:47.000 Good, good.
00:43:47.000 You're on the air.
00:43:48.000 We're live.
00:43:51.000 Really?
00:43:51.000 Oh, my God.
00:43:54.000 Dad wants on speaker because, you know...
00:44:00.000 I was just talking about a liberal friend of mine who gives Biden a C-.
00:44:06.000 What would you give Biden as a grade?
00:44:07.000 You were a teacher for many years.
00:44:09.000 Yeah, I think it's called an F.
00:44:27.000 Justin Trudeau, yes.
00:44:28.000 Justin Trudeau?
00:44:29.000 I mean, come on!
00:44:31.000 The guy calls himself a teacher.
00:44:34.000 He was a drama teacher for two months, and then he got fired for God knows what all.
00:44:41.000 I don't know.
00:44:41.000 I mean, why do we have leaders like this?
00:44:47.000 Two smart, advanced countries full of really smart people.
00:44:52.000 I know, I mean, we spent four months, five months in America, in Florida.
00:44:58.000 I just don't get it.
00:45:01.000 The world has gone so crazy that we've now got leaders that are just not appropriate to what people want and need.
00:45:11.000 You know?
00:45:12.000 Do you want inflation?
00:45:13.000 Do you want to have no power?
00:45:16.000 You cancel... What the?
00:45:20.000 She cancelled the call.
00:45:21.000 She probably pushed a button or something.
00:45:24.000 The government is a little too hip to her truth.
00:45:27.000 I can't believe Biden's wife
00:45:37.000 Went to college, that I could believe, and she took philosophy.
00:45:44.000 So where does she get the colossal nerve to be called a doctor?
00:45:49.000 Give me a break.
00:45:50.000 It's early childhood education is her doctorate, and it's the lowest IQ PhD you can get.
00:45:55.000 I mean, how do you fuck it up?
00:45:57.000 Here's how five-year-olds should be educated.
00:46:00.000 How do you get that wrong?
00:46:02.000 How is she a doctor?
00:46:05.000 She needs a doctor, so does he.
00:46:07.000 You ever see him coming off the airplane?
00:46:11.000 Yes, he falls when he walks.
00:46:14.000 They say he suffers from dementia.
00:46:16.000 I don't know if he does or not.
00:46:18.000 And he blames inflation on the Ukraine war.
00:46:23.000 Okay?
00:46:24.000 He's not doing nothing to lower gas prices.
00:46:28.000 The salaries suck.
00:46:31.000 Okay?
00:46:32.000 At least when Trump was president, people prospered, and he wasn't scared to face the dictators.
00:46:41.000 You look like you're disappearing into that couch the way Homer Simpson disappears into the shrubs.
00:46:45.000 He wasn't scared to face the dictators.
00:46:47.000 He had gumption, you know?
00:46:51.000 Biden tried to make a deal with Iran of all insulting things.
00:46:58.000 What is he, a retard?
00:47:01.000 Well, Obama's deal with Iran was particularly terrible.
00:47:04.000 Well, Obama I could forgive because he was naive, but Clinton wasn't, and they gave them so much money, American taxpayer money, then when the inspectors went to look at their plants, they said, oh, you could go to these, but not this one.
00:47:23.000 So we gave away money.
00:47:25.000 Why is it in this country, even many years ago, I believe it was the early 60s, Russia was starving, we sent potatoes.
00:47:34.000 Why in this country, other countries bad-mouth us, look down on us, but when they're in trouble, we're the first ones they run to.
00:47:43.000 Help, help, help.
00:47:44.000 What do we look like?
00:47:46.000 We look like pussies internationally.
00:47:49.000 Like saps.
00:47:50.000 Like saps.
00:47:51.000 Like saps.
00:47:52.000 We had a message earlier that said hipster, hacker, hustler.
00:47:55.000 Explain that.
00:47:56.000 It's a thing I stole from some Japanese marketing guy.
00:47:59.000 I said every successful company has to have a hipster, a hacker and a hustler.
00:48:03.000 So the hipster is the guy who cares about all the culture and what's going on in the world and can tell you like what LOL means when it first comes out.
00:48:11.000 That's important to have.
00:48:13.000 You need a hacker who can figure out why your machines don't work, why your message isn't getting out, why these cameras keep failing.
00:48:20.000 And then you need a hustler, which is like a sales guy who is going out there getting new clients and everything.
00:48:26.000 And people can be combinations.
00:48:28.000 Like, Ryan and I are both hipsters in the sense that we're both, you know, heavily involved in pop culture.
00:48:37.000 But he's the hacker.
00:48:39.000 And then the hustler is a guy you guys don't know.
00:48:41.000 We have like a sales dude out there that we hired that handles all that.
00:48:44.000 And then we have the hacker, our tech dude.
00:48:48.000 But you need those three elements to have a successful business.
00:48:51.000 With Vice, I was the hipster obviously.
00:48:55.000 Shane was the hustler.
00:48:57.000 And I guess Saroosh was sort of the hacker.
00:48:59.000 I'm a hustler.
00:49:02.000 And I only hustle what I believe in.
00:49:05.000 I'm aggressive.
00:49:06.000 I always have been, always will.
00:49:08.000 Have you ever been to prison?
00:49:11.000 No, I had husbands who did heavy time.
00:49:17.000 Okay, let's take a sojourn briefly over to FOP Metals.
00:49:21.000 Now, this is spelled P-H-A-U-P.
00:49:25.000 Not FOP, which is a derogatory term for wealthy Englishmen.
00:49:33.000 Used mostly in Australia.
00:49:35.000 It's also used to refer to dandies.
00:49:39.000 Wait a minute, is that what Australians call Englishmen?
00:49:42.000 FOBs?
00:49:45.000 No, maybe not.
00:49:46.000 But FOP, P-H-A-U-P, is a sponsor of ours.
00:49:51.000 They're going to make us our own coin, right?
00:49:54.000 Well, I thought that would be a good idea.
00:49:55.000 We're not sure yet.
00:49:57.000 Okay.
00:49:59.000 The economy could not be worse.
00:50:01.000 What's going on there with your shit there, Ryan?
00:50:04.000 Shitshow.
00:50:06.000 Will you stop that fucking notification?
00:50:09.000 I'm not doing it on purpose.
00:50:10.000 It's running out of memory.
00:50:12.000 What?
00:50:13.000 Our computer.
00:50:14.000 How is your computer running out of memory?
00:50:15.000 Well, that's the old one.
00:50:16.000 The new one's doing it.
00:50:17.000 We clearly don't have a hacker on board here.
00:50:20.000 No.
00:50:22.000 So the economy's collapsing.
00:50:23.000 You know, when Biden was elected, my dad took all of his money out of his stocks and he put it in a bank.
00:50:29.000 And he lost, I think, 50 grand or something in actualized losses by cashing out, and my brother and I mocked him.
00:50:36.000 We laughed in his face, and he was very angry about it.
00:50:41.000 But, dude, you're showing all your work here behind us.
00:50:47.000 It turns out he was right.
00:50:48.000 The economy is so bad right now that it does make sense to have pulled your money out.
00:50:54.000 I don't know about now.
00:50:55.000 We have Bitcoin down to fucking zero.
00:50:57.000 But one thing that does not fluctuate is precious metals.
00:51:01.000 Go to FopMetals.com.
00:51:04.000 Use promo code Gavin for 15% off and at least invest some money.
00:51:11.000 We're good to go.
00:51:31.000 In an era where nothing is real.
00:51:34.000 In an era where clown world reigns supreme.
00:51:37.000 Where we have a new press secretary coming out.
00:51:40.000 A black lesbian who is convinced that everything she looks at is racist.
00:51:45.000 And she'll be representing the president who cannot speak English.
00:51:49.000 And he talks about tasting anger over inflation.
00:51:53.000 That's the economy we're living in.
00:51:55.000 A clown economy.
00:51:56.000 So buy something solid that you can touch, that you can safely know is there for you if the shit hits the fan.
00:52:03.000 You can go on the run, go on the lam if we lose everything and it becomes Venezuela.
00:52:09.000 You have silver.
00:52:10.000 You don't have to put all your life savings on it.
00:52:12.000 What?
00:52:13.000 They call it God's money.
00:52:15.000 God's money.
00:52:16.000 I wish the Federal Reserve was based on gold.
00:52:20.000 Used to be.
00:52:20.000 That would save everything.
00:52:22.000 But anyway, Fop Metals.
00:52:23.000 P-H-A-U-P metals dot com.
00:52:26.000 Promo code Gavin.
00:52:28.000 We should have a Sylvia silver dollar.
00:52:32.000 Print minted.
00:52:32.000 Sounds good to me.
00:52:33.000 Dude, I'm writing that down on my notes.
00:52:35.000 If Fop is going to make us silver, I want it to be Sylvia's face.
00:52:40.000 Yes.
00:52:42.000 What about gold?
00:52:43.000 I heard gold shot up in price.
00:52:44.000 They have gold on the side as well I believe.
00:52:47.000 Oh really?
00:52:48.000 I dropped a little today.
00:53:03.000 It was like $1,830 an ounce.
00:53:05.000 Good time to buy.
00:53:06.000 I know a guy who works at a factory where they make, I don't know, gold bars or they have gold.
00:53:11.000 And you go in there, they brush your whole body with like these metal detector things and then they scan your whole body.
00:53:19.000 You have to leave all your shit outside.
00:53:20.000 You put on like a bunny suit.
00:53:22.000 And then they weigh you when you go in and they weigh you when you go out.
00:53:26.000 So you don't put it up your... Yeah, just in case you put a little fuckin' ring in your stinker.
00:53:31.000 That's a good band name.
00:53:33.000 Put a little ring in your stinker.
00:53:36.000 Alright, let's take a call.
00:53:38.000 Fuckin' A. Take a fuckin' call.
00:53:43.000 So the show in Orlando's gonna be fun.
00:53:45.000 Hell yeah.
00:53:46.000 Matty will be there.
00:53:46.000 I will.
00:53:49.000 Sylvia, ideally, would be there.
00:53:51.000 Where is this, Orlando?
00:53:53.000 Orlando, Florida, yeah.
00:53:55.000 Probably not.
00:53:56.000 I can't leave Tinkerbell alone.
00:53:58.000 I left her alone too many times.
00:54:00.000 It's hard to get you here to the studio.
00:54:02.000 That's my baby.
00:54:03.000 Or I could take a train there with her.
00:54:07.000 I don't want the six-month-old and I don't want the 79-year-old.
00:54:11.000 That's my baby.
00:54:14.000 So what I want to do is, this is how I picture it in my head.
00:54:19.000 Ryan comes out.
00:54:22.000 Great people, great.
00:54:24.000 He's doing his shit.
00:54:25.000 He has his phone doing his Snapchat face.
00:54:29.000 Behind you on the screen is you, but with the Trump face.
00:54:34.000 That's cool.
00:54:36.000 We must have the technology.
00:54:38.000 I think we do.
00:54:39.000 So people who look at you right there in front of them see you holding a phone going, bye bye, home to mommy.
00:54:47.000 But we see Trump.
00:54:49.000 That would be amazing.
00:54:50.000 And then you introduce Josh Denny.
00:54:52.000 Then you come out and do the same thing as Jordan Peterson.
00:54:55.000 Introduce Kumea.
00:54:57.000 Then you come out as Jesse Lee Peterson.
00:54:59.000 Introduce me.
00:55:00.000 And then we all go backstage and we come out.
00:55:04.000 We set up a table like Kill Tony.
00:55:08.000 And we all sit down and do a podcast just to show.
00:55:11.000 Maybe we also have the screen we can refer to pictures and videos.
00:55:15.000 Maybe highlights our favorite things of the past year.
00:55:18.000 Like of course for me it's Eddie Glaude.
00:55:20.000 I watch that every day.
00:55:23.000 The myths and the legends and bear the brunt of it.
00:55:26.000 The privilege of growing up in a tradition that didn't believe in the myths and the legends because we had to bear the brunt of them.
00:55:34.000 I hereby bet my fortune that those glasses are not prescription.
00:55:46.000 He loves his little blue frames.
00:55:47.000 Maybe I'm naive, but I don't say that apologetically.
00:55:51.000 I believe the Washington insurrection.
00:55:56.000 I don't believe Trump started it.
00:55:58.000 He was being patriotic.
00:56:00.000 He felt he was wrong.
00:56:01.000 He was angry.
00:56:03.000 I think the people that went ahead and twisted what he said, they twisted it.
00:56:09.000 They wanted an excuse.
00:56:11.000 Well, we got Lori Lightfoot calling for violence, demanding a revolution, and there's no ramifications.
00:56:19.000 Trump said very clearly, legally,
00:56:22.000 Make your voices heard.
00:56:23.000 Legally.
00:56:24.000 He didn't ask for any storming of any capitals.
00:56:27.000 No, he didn't.
00:56:28.000 And they always wanted to blame him.
00:56:29.000 Although the way the cops let them in, it sure looked like the cops asked for some storming of some capitals.
00:56:33.000 They blamed him.
00:56:34.000 Unfairly.
00:56:35.000 He never got a good review from the press.
00:56:38.000 They always picked at him.
00:56:39.000 You're right, Sylvia.
00:56:41.000 You nailed it once again.
00:56:42.000 They picked him to pieces.
00:56:44.000 They didn't do it to Obama, because Obama was our first black president.
00:56:49.000 Not the big.
00:56:50.000 Let's take a call and then we'll say thank you to Johnny Apple CBD and then we will sneak behind the paywall and stop all this free shit.
00:57:02.000 The people that you're kicking off, the freebies, this is what they had to say about you.
00:57:08.000 Gavin's a demon.
00:57:09.000 You know that, right?
00:57:13.000 I like how efficient she is at taking the kinks out of her water bottle.
00:57:17.000 Gavin's a demon.
00:57:18.000 You know that, right?
00:57:20.000 Boom.
00:57:21.000 Water bottle's brand new.
00:57:23.000 One second that water bottle's brand new.
00:57:26.000 All those hours of crinkles erased.
00:57:29.000 Hello Mr. Crinkle.
00:57:31.000 So we have our calls coming in of course.
00:57:33.000 And the first two callers will have won a thing.
00:57:36.000 A beard vet.
00:57:37.000 A beard vet vet.
00:57:39.000 Gavin.
00:57:40.000 Am I on?
00:57:40.000 Yes.
00:57:42.000 Go ahead, call her.
00:57:43.000 Whoa.
00:58:02.000 Um, the reason I did is I saw in the news, Kanye West is out of his mind, but no matter how crazy he is, he has a part that can recognize what's going on with the left.
00:58:11.000 And he said, the MAGA hat makes him feel like a superhero.
00:58:15.000 And when I heard that, I was like, I'm going to put it on because I didn't wear it except on 4th of July last year and see how it would make me feel.
00:58:21.000 And everyone started giving me disgusting looks.
00:58:24.000 I got, I got maybe two or three yells from cars on the street.
00:58:27.000 I was in San Diego.
00:58:30.000 What are the yells?
00:58:31.000 Fuck you!
00:58:34.000 Yes, just fuck you and fuck Trump or Nazi.
00:58:38.000 Like two of those, two or three.
00:58:40.000 But what I recognize is, I think what I have, what I put the hat on, it doesn't make me special, but what it makes me is, I think it emphasizes that I have freedom of thought.
00:58:51.000 And when people freak out and they're ingrained in Trump is a Nazi and whatever, the red hat symbolizes
00:59:00.000 Whatever they decipher Trump as, as Hitler, as whatever.
00:59:03.000 But the red cap for me felt like I was a superhero.
00:59:10.000 The red hat symbolized that I had freedom of thought.
00:59:12.000 And Gavin, I just want to know what your opinion is on that.
00:59:14.000 Because also, obviously, I don't want to go to restaurants with the hat on.
00:59:19.000 You obviously get bit in your food all the time just being Gavin McInnes.
00:59:23.000 Well yeah, I'm at the point now, and thanks for calling, where if people don't spit on my food it tastes dry.
00:59:32.000 But it's amazing what that hat means.
00:59:34.000 What that hat really means today is, especially in a liberal city like New York or San Diego, it means I don't give a shit about your made-up hysteria.
00:59:45.000 That's what this means.
00:59:46.000 It means, I know you think this is racist.
00:59:48.000 I don't care what you think is racist.
00:59:51.000 It means I don't want three bathrooms.
00:59:56.000 And when you tell me why there should be a male and a female and a trans bathroom, instead of like most Americans, I'm going, okay, let me hear you out.
01:00:04.000 You might have a point.
01:00:05.000 I'm just going, no, no.
01:00:07.000 Like when Trump said,
01:00:09.000 Kept saying anchor babies that the Univision, whatever, journalist said, can you use a better term?
01:00:14.000 He said, what term?
01:00:15.000 And the guy said, I don't know, the undocumented workers of, uh, no, the natural born citizens of undocumented workers.
01:00:22.000 And Trump said, nah.
01:00:24.000 Now that nah is crucial.
01:00:27.000 Nah, nah.
01:00:29.000 That takes too long.
01:00:30.000 I'm going to say anchor babies.
01:00:31.000 The nah is what the red hat means.
01:00:35.000 It means nah.
01:00:36.000 I'm not listening to your, like, gender shit.
01:00:38.000 I'm not saying I'm against it or I'm offended by it or I want to argue with you about it.
01:00:43.000 I'm not, I'm not, we're not playing that.
01:00:44.000 No.
01:00:45.000 I'm not doing it.
01:00:47.000 No.
01:00:48.000 No, I'm out.
01:00:50.000 Well, we want to have a cis-born male compete in a female swimming thing because she identifies as a woman.
01:00:58.000 No, no, no.
01:01:00.000 No, we're not doing that.
01:01:01.000 We're not doing that.
01:01:02.000 Well, can we debate it?
01:01:03.000 No.
01:01:04.000 We're just not doing it.
01:01:05.000 Nothing to debate?
01:01:06.000 No.
01:01:06.000 Well, she's here.
01:01:07.000 The starting gun's about to go off.
01:01:10.000 Okay, well, hold on.
01:01:11.000 Let me grab him.
01:01:11.000 Hey, buddy.
01:01:12.000 Sorry, we're not doing that.
01:01:14.000 Get your hands off of me!
01:01:16.000 Okay, sorry.
01:01:16.000 Well, I'll get back to the changing room and I'll get my hands off you.
01:01:20.000 But yeah, we're not... That's what I love about the MAGA hat.
01:01:23.000 It's a non-statement.
01:01:24.000 And the way the left is now is, if you're not 100% with me, you're 100% against me.
01:01:29.000 So just by simply not joining their maniacal crusade, it's the most evil thing you could possibly do to them.
01:01:37.000 Is to go, I don't even disagree with you.
01:01:40.000 I'm not getting involved.
01:01:42.000 Your thing is gay.
01:01:44.000 Your thing is retarded.
01:01:47.000 You talk like a fag and your shit is all retarded.
01:01:50.000 And I'm not paying any attention to your various new made up rules that change on a daily basis.
01:01:58.000 Imagine being mad at someone for not, like it's, it's like when I was a punk rocker as a teenager, me walking down the street and seeing people without mohawks and without bondage pants and going, what the fuck?
01:02:10.000 We're trying to have a revolution here!
01:02:12.000 And they're like, I'm just not into punk.
01:02:15.000 I think it's noisy.
01:02:16.000 Well, that's not true!
01:02:18.000 Fuck you!
01:02:18.000 What about Bow Wow Wow?
01:02:21.000 They're musical.
01:02:22.000 There's a lot of poppy stuff within the punk genre.
01:02:26.000 Come on!
01:02:27.000 Come on board!
01:02:28.000 Nah.
01:02:29.000 Bow Wow Wow?
01:02:30.000 Nah.
01:02:30.000 He had a mohawk.
01:02:31.000 I'm not coming on board.
01:02:33.000 All right.
01:02:34.000 Last sponsor before we leave.
01:02:35.000 I don't like, by the way, Ryan, how Maddie and I are different sizes.
01:02:39.000 We look like different species.
01:02:42.000 Yeah.
01:02:42.000 I look a little pale.
01:02:45.000 No, you don't.
01:02:46.000 You have normal color.
01:02:49.000 Johnny, wait, I smell weed.
01:02:52.000 It could be the Johnny Apple CBD that I've been puffing on.
01:02:55.000 Are you puffing on the Delta 8?
01:02:58.000 Um, I make it a habit during the live show to take at least one little puff.
01:03:03.000 But isn't the Delta 8 super strong?
01:03:04.000 Yep.
01:03:06.000 So aren't you gonna be too big to work?
01:03:08.000 Might you do an even shittier job than you usually do?
01:03:11.000 Are you gonna become shitshow squared?
01:03:13.000 Yeah.
01:03:14.000 Let's see.
01:03:15.000 This is the Stem to Go.
01:03:17.000 You can recharge it, but it's a one-time use little just boppity boop.
01:03:21.000 And it's got Super Hemp in there.
01:03:22.000 It makes you feel good.
01:03:24.000 Super what?
01:03:25.000 Super Hemp.
01:03:26.000 Super Hemp in it.
01:03:27.000 Super Hemp!
01:03:28.000 You bidened that.
01:03:28.000 You said, it's got Super Hemp in it.
01:03:31.000 Cuz I'm blazed.
01:03:32.000 Hell man, I was the vice principal under Barack Toboggan.
01:03:34.000 And you gotta try this nighttime tincture, man.
01:03:37.000 Come on.
01:03:37.000 Come on, I can taste it.
01:03:39.000 I can taste it.
01:03:40.000 You can taste that.
01:03:41.000 They have some, all this stuff is good, and that shit tastes good.
01:03:44.000 The tincture?
01:03:44.000 Couple of drops under the tongue.
01:03:46.000 Oh yeah.
01:03:47.000 So yes, Johnny Apple CBD.
01:03:49.000 I like the gummies at night.
01:03:50.000 They help me sleep.
01:03:52.000 Sometimes I sleep so hard that when I wake up in the middle of the night, my hands are tingling.
01:03:57.000 Not like pins and needles, but just like tingling.
01:03:59.000 You ever get that?
01:04:01.000 I get that when I drink a lot too.
01:04:02.000 I wake up in the morning and my hands are tingling.
01:04:05.000 Do you ever get that?
01:04:06.000 Yeah, I've had that experience.
01:04:07.000 What is that?
01:04:09.000 I would say it's nerves or something.
01:04:11.000 Drinking cuts your sex urge.
01:04:14.000 Drinking cuts your sex urge?
01:04:16.000 Oh yeah.
01:04:16.000 How about marijuana?
01:04:18.000 It makes you last.
01:04:19.000 That's probably why your Puerto Rican colored guys last so long.
01:04:23.000 They're drunk.
01:04:24.000 No, they weren't drunk.
01:04:26.000 I never went to bed with a drunk man.
01:04:28.000 I don't mean shit face, but like... I don't mean drunk.
01:04:32.000 No liquor in them.
01:04:34.000 Four drinks.
01:04:36.000 No, no liquor at all.
01:04:38.000 Really?
01:04:38.000 How about marijuana?
01:04:39.000 They don't have the same inhibitions like white dudes.
01:04:44.000 They do not have it.
01:04:46.000 What do you think marijuana does to the sex?
01:04:49.000 Latinos are very romantic.
01:04:52.000 They'll say verbally things to you to a woman where you want to open your legs like a butterfly.
01:04:59.000 Like what?
01:04:59.000 What would be a good quote?
01:05:02.000 Your vagina looks like two pink slugs making love in the night sky.
01:05:11.000 It's been so long I can't remember.
01:05:13.000 Okay, well that would be a good one.
01:05:16.000 So yeah, JohnnyAppleCBD, JohnnyApple.com, promo code Gavin.
01:05:21.000 We've got the cookies!
01:05:22.000 No longer make cookies, sorry.
01:05:24.000 We don't have the cookies anymore.
01:05:25.000 No.
01:05:26.000 We have the tincture you put in your coffee to take the edge off.
01:05:31.000 Uh, we have the CBD cream that you put on your muscles after, you know, remember you have a leg day at the gym and then going up and down the stairs is a fucking nightmare for the next 24 hours?
01:05:43.000 Not with the CBD ointment.
01:05:46.000 I, my wife will put it on her feet if she's going to go out on a date with me and wear high heel shoes all night.
01:05:52.000 She puts CBD in her tootsies.
01:05:55.000 It makes the high-heeled shoes more tolerable.
01:05:57.000 What's good about that, too, is it masks the pain, but it doesn't speed up the recovery process.
01:06:04.000 So if you were to take something that speeds up the recovery, now that your body's like, oh, I don't know if I'm recovering to go to the gym.
01:06:10.000 Why are you Mike Myers every time you explain something?
01:06:16.000 We have to, are we going to watch the pentavirate?
01:06:18.000 Yeah.
01:06:19.000 Oh, we should all watch that together.
01:06:20.000 That should be an episode.
01:06:21.000 We'll watch the pentavirate.
01:06:23.000 You know what would be cool?
01:06:24.000 We watch it in this format.
01:06:26.000 Yeah, that would be rad.
01:06:28.000 So like you sit there, Ryan sits there, I sit here and we just go through it all.
01:06:33.000 I wonder how the f we're going to do it now that they blocked us from capturing their screen.
01:06:38.000 Remember?
01:06:39.000 We'll figure it away.
01:06:40.000 Yeah.
01:06:41.000 But, um,
01:06:43.000 We could put it on that TV and film it.
01:06:45.000 But I bet you that will end up being, with all the pauses, like four or five hours.
01:06:51.000 So we could play that, if we're ever gonna go away for like a week, we could play that in like four parts.
01:06:57.000 Anyway, fun idea.
01:06:59.000 This is all in a commercial for johnnyapple.com.
01:07:02.000 Johnny Apple CBD.
01:07:04.000 Great guy, Johnny Appleseed.
01:07:06.000 You know, a lot of people think that he was planting apple trees because he loved apples and wanted people to make apple pies.
01:07:12.000 No.
01:07:13.000 He was a drug dealer, basically, and the drug was booze.
01:07:18.000 So he would go on the outskirts of the Pioneer's land and predict what direction they're going to go in like years ahead.
01:07:25.000 Plant apple trees.
01:07:27.000 By the time they got there, there'd be apple trees.
01:07:29.000 He'd sell them apples for cider.
01:07:32.000 They'd get drunk on the apple cider.
01:07:34.000 Because everyone was drinking booze back then.
01:07:36.000 Because life sucked.
01:07:37.000 Because we were at war with the Indians for 400 fucking years.
01:07:43.000 Instead of ripping down statues and everything, how about we go, wow, you guys went through some shit.
01:07:48.000 North and South.
01:07:49.000 We're very impressed that you got us here.
01:07:51.000 Thanks for that.
01:07:52.000 Great-great-grandpa.
01:07:53.000 As opposed to fucking ripping down Johnny Rebel.
01:07:58.000 The way that statue in particular, the way it crumpled and curled in on itself, just with the gravity and the weight that they used.
01:08:07.000 It's like, this guy was conscripted.
01:08:08.000 You think he had slaves?
01:08:10.000 Slaves were Lamborghinis back then.
01:08:11.000 2% of the population had them.
01:08:15.000 You're beating the shit out of some poor schmuck who was 17 and got ripped off a farm and sent to die.
01:08:22.000 Fuck you, Nazi!
01:08:24.000 Anyway, I'm not sure Johnny Apple endorses all of these takes on Confederate history, but they do endorse a good time.
01:08:33.000 So just inhale and relax at JohnnyApple.com.
01:08:37.000 All right.
01:08:39.000 That's enough for the freeloaders.
01:08:40.000 We were supposed to give them 30 minutes.
01:08:42.000 We gave them 70.
01:08:45.000 I can't believe we did that.
01:08:46.000 I feel dirty inside.
01:08:47.000 I feel like a whore.
01:08:48.000 I feel like a slut.
01:08:51.000 But we did squeeze in five sponsors.
01:08:54.000 So this is the way we end the show behind the paywall.
01:08:57.000 And by the way, the show is five days a week, Monday to Friday.
01:09:00.000 And then on Saturdays, I play reruns of my old show, which you haven't seen, which is called The Gavin McInnes Show.
01:09:06.000 You can watch that and watch the Proud Boys slowly emerge from 2015 on.
01:09:13.000 So in the interim, when you're out there, don't be ashamed of who you are.
01:09:19.000 Don't hide it.
01:09:21.000 It could get you dumped.
01:09:22.000 It could get you ostracized from your friends.
01:09:25.000 If you say how you truly feel about things, you may even lose your job.
01:09:28.000 Now, don't go out of your way to lose your job, but if hiding and never saying what you mean in a very diplomatic and fair and legal fashion is gonna get you fired, well then fuck that job.
01:09:41.000 It's not for you.
01:09:42.000 You'll get cancer if you stay bottled up and never say what's on your mind.
01:09:47.000 You should say what's on your mind.
01:09:50.000 Defend yourself.
01:09:51.000 Be rational.
01:09:52.000 Don't say stupid shit like I want to fuck kids and blacks should go back to Africa.
01:09:58.000 If that's how you feel, you're a retard and you shouldn't just shut up.
01:10:01.000 You should kill yourself.
01:10:03.000 But for the rest of us sane people,
01:10:06.000 Speak rationally, state your case, get fired, get in trouble, be brave, and never stop fighting.
01:10:39.000 Move.
01:10:40.000 We don't know what he's planning.
01:10:41.000 Ain't nobody got time for that.