Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - GOML LIVE #178

00:00:15.000 In the morning I get some places I meet some girls I gotta say

00:00:50.000 I don't think that takes any explaining.

00:00:53.000 It is clearly your archetypal, run-of-the-mill, 70s Zambian rock band.

00:01:02.000 Right?

00:01:03.000 I mean, come on.

00:01:04.000 We're all familiar with Zambian funk rock.

00:01:07.000 Who isn't?

00:01:07.000 I am.

00:01:09.000 Donald Duck!

00:01:10.000 Sylvia, what's your favorite Zambian rock band from the 70s?

00:01:17.000 Oh, you gotta talk into the mic there.

00:01:18.000 You got the mic?

00:01:21.000 Have you got a microphone?

00:01:23.000 You got Tostitos out the wazoo.

00:01:24.000 The Beatles!

00:01:28.000 I like the Beatles.

00:01:30.000 Yeah, they weren't Zambian, were they?

00:01:31.000 I thought they were from Liverpool.

00:01:34.000 They were from Liverpool.

00:01:35.000 Matty O'Dell, favorite Zambian family rock band.

00:01:39.000 I must say, I don't know any.

00:01:42.000 You pretend to be a music expert.

00:01:45.000 As soon as it's time to really put the pedal to the metal.

00:01:49.000 I fell flat.

00:01:50.000 To pull the rubber on the road.

00:01:52.000 No idea.

00:01:53.000 No idea.

00:01:54.000 I don't even know where the fuck Zambia is.

00:01:56.000 What is Zambia?

00:01:58.000 I have no idea.

00:01:59.000 I'm always amazed when anything in Africa works.

00:02:04.000 Like, I guess this is racist, but when there's a building in Kenya, like a skyscraper, I'm like, who the fuck?

00:02:12.000 Who made that for you?

00:02:14.000 I went out with Jomo Kenyatta's son.

00:02:17.000 Who's Jomo Kenyatta?

00:02:19.000 Oh my god.

00:02:20.000 From the Mau Mau Uprising.

00:02:23.000 Oh, we're getting into like all those late 60s, early 70s revolutionaries like Ame and the Black Panthers and everything, right?

00:02:32.000 No, he was nothing like the Black Panthers.

00:02:35.000 He was against the British.

00:02:37.000 He became president.

00:02:38.000 Oh, I'm sorry, Malmo Uprising.

00:02:40.000 We're talking about Africa now.

00:02:42.000 That is Africa!

00:02:43.000 Can you wake up and smell the cocaine, Gavin?

00:02:50.000 What's that strange sound we have clipping away?

00:02:52.000 Something coming out of the speaker.

00:02:53.000 I don't know why I'm coming out.

00:02:55.000 Okay.

00:02:56.000 We didn't do much preparing, I guess, before we started the show.

00:03:00.000 We have Tim Dickman, as usual, and his partner, Neil.

00:03:04.000 Now, I know you homophobes jump to homosexuality when we say partner.

00:03:08.000 It's also a police term.

00:03:11.000 You guys were together as friends for, what, 20 years?

00:03:15.000 20 plus years, yes.

00:03:21.000 So there's only one mic for the three of them?

00:03:25.000 Tim has a little doohickey?

00:03:29.000 Uh, you guys ever shoot anyone?

00:03:31.000 No.

00:03:32.000 Were you ever shot at?

00:03:34.000 No.

00:03:35.000 So, state troopers, pretty easy job, isn't it?

00:03:38.000 It's just drunks and speeders.

00:03:40.000 Well, you know, a lot of the situations you get in are, you know, how you present yourself.

00:03:44.000 You may, you know, you may deflect some things, you may de-escalate some things right away that, you know, you never know what could have happened.

00:03:51.000 You know, we got plenty of guns off the street, plenty of bad guys, so...

00:03:55.000 Do you think Derek Chauvin could have de-escalated that situation better?

00:04:00.000 Uh, yeah.

00:04:03.000 I think the confrontation between him and George Floyd was pretty routine up until the point he looked up and people were videotaping while he was kneeling on his back and he was overdosing from fentanyl.

00:04:15.000 He could have de-escalated it by just, you know, pretending to care that he didn't overdose.

00:04:20.000 It bothers me that police work is contingent on who's filming and how the media will run with it.

00:04:27.000 Exactly.

00:04:30.000 So what should be his punishment?

00:04:31.000 You're the judge.

00:04:34.000 Derek Chauvin's punishment.

00:04:37.000 Departmental.

00:04:38.000 You know, maybe suspended for a couple days.

00:04:41.000 I mean, people die in police custody all the time.

00:04:47.000 That's my point.

00:04:48.000 I think George Floyd was going to die that day, whether he was kneeling on his back or not.

00:04:55.000 Derek Chauvin, if you're watching this right now, I hope, if it was up to me, you would get a hundred dollar fine and you'd have to pick up garbage by the fucking highway for at least six hours!

00:05:07.000 And I don't care if it's raining, I don't care if it's snowing, I want your ass by that highway picking up trash from 9 a.m.

00:05:16.000 10, 11, 12, 1, 2, to fucking 3 p.m.

00:05:17.000 No breaks!

00:05:26.000 Pack a sandwich, bitch!

00:05:28.000 You act like it's okay, like it's ordinary and accepted that cons die at police.

00:05:37.000 Fuck them.

00:05:38.000 Fuck your attitude, where it breathes.

00:05:41.000 Wait, my attitude?

00:05:42.000 Yeah, you said, oh, it's very ordinary.

00:05:45.000 Well, people commit suicide.

00:05:46.000 No, I didn't mean that.

00:05:47.000 No, listen, you misunderstood.

00:05:48.000 I didn't mean people

00:05:51.000 Cops kill people every day.

00:05:52.000 I said people die in police custody.

00:05:54.000 They overdose.

00:05:55.000 They commit suicide.

00:05:56.000 Death by cop.

00:05:57.000 Suicide by cop.

00:05:57.000 And some police kill them.

00:05:59.000 Sometimes they point guns at cops.

00:06:01.000 Sylvia, police have gone to your house and prevented you from being a punching bag for your various miscreant spouses and you hate cops.

00:06:11.000 I don't hate them.

00:06:12.000 Not true.

00:06:14.000 I've talked to the cops that used to go to your house.

00:06:18.000 I know cops who used to go to your house and they were like, he used to treat her like a punching bag, they said.

00:06:23.000 They came to my house because of domestic violence.

00:06:25.000 That's a whole nother world, Gavin.

00:06:27.000 What?

00:06:28.000 I missed that, sorry.

00:06:29.000 Came to my house because of domestic violence.

00:06:32.000 That's a whole nother world.

00:06:35.000 I'm feeling upset.

00:06:37.000 Did you ever call them?

00:06:39.000 Of course I called them.

00:06:40.000 I was the victim.

00:06:40.000 Were you happy when they got there?

00:06:41.000 Yeah, of course.

00:06:44.000 But I know what they're capable of when it comes to convicts.

00:06:48.000 But it's rare.

00:06:49.000 No, it's not rare.

00:06:50.000 Bullshit.

00:06:51.000 Bullshit.

00:06:51.000 Trust me, it's rare.

00:06:54.000 Think about what you think about!

00:06:56.000 No, wait a minute.

00:06:58.000 She's talking about corrections officers now.

00:07:00.000 Are you talking about COs?

00:07:01.000 Yeah.

00:07:02.000 COs.

00:07:03.000 I've heard some bad stuff about COs.

00:07:05.000 What do you think, Matty?

00:07:06.000 You're the expert on COs.

00:07:06.000 Well, it is a very unfortunate situation.

00:07:10.000 You were the one being corrected.

00:07:11.000 I knew a narcotics cop in Miami that was as crooked as a day is long.

00:07:24.000 Okay, that's a different subject, Sylvia.

00:07:26.000 Wait, tell me about the incident.

00:07:27.000 Yeah, stay on track here.

00:07:29.000 Oh, it was a guy in... He's dead now.

00:07:32.000 Officer Smith in Westchester County Department of Corrections.

00:07:36.000 He's called Smitty.

00:07:38.000 Even his own co-workers hated him.

00:07:39.000 He was just a real fucking scumbag douche cop, like CO.

00:07:44.000 And I was working in the officers mess hall and he used to just come in and just...

00:07:50.000 Fucking, just nitpick about everything.

00:07:53.000 Like, oh this place is filthy, disgusting.

00:07:55.000 I said, well don't fucking eat here, what the fuck you want me to tell you?

00:07:59.000 I said, so he said something, he goes, he said something, I gave him a smart answer.

00:08:04.000 And he's like, that's it, go back to your block, you know, I'm writing you up.

00:08:07.000 I was like, alright, whatever.

00:08:09.000 So I'm starting to leave, and he said, yeah that's right, walk away, boy.

00:08:13.000 And I turned around and said, who the fuck you calling boy?

00:08:15.000 I said, you see a boy, you fucking smack a boy.

00:08:18.000 And then me and him got into it, and then all the cops started.

00:08:20.000 Whoa, whoa, whoa.

00:08:21.000 We cannot gloss over details like got into it.

00:08:25.000 Yeah, we got into it.

00:08:26.000 I need to know, first punch, block, pretend we're eight years old in the school yard.

00:08:30.000 Oh, when I stopped to turn around, we were like chest to chest.

00:08:33.000 And he went to push me, so I grabbed his shirt and uniform and pulled him with me.

00:08:39.000 So then we fell on the floor, and then we were rolling around in the hallway.

00:08:42.000 Did you stomp him?

00:08:44.000 So he can't swing.

00:08:45.000 And then, you know, there's a bubble, what they call the bubble.

00:08:48.000 They're all there, and then they all come out, and oh my God, the two biggest guys.

00:08:52.000 You know, they finally get me in cuffs, and I swear to God, they pick me up by my handcuffs, and they got my feet about three, four inches off the ground by my hands.

00:09:01.000 Like, I'm cuffed like this, and they're holding me off the ground by my hand, like by my wrist.

00:09:06.000 Right, I get it, yeah.

00:09:08.000 But then it was fucked up because now I'm getting put in the shoot like what they call key block so I'm in my cell everything you know they're there the response team comes and they got the video camera and you know they're filming the side of the wall you know they're doing what they're doing they take me to my cell put me down lie you down you got to like take your handcuffs can't get off until they leave the cell blah blah but then like

00:09:30.000 20 officers came through the block and came up to our cell and was like, you're right on.

00:09:34.000 Fuck that dude.

00:09:35.000 Yeah, I was gonna say that.

00:09:35.000 Oh really?

00:09:36.000 Because if it was like some nice female CO that got punched in the face, I bet you would have got tuned up beyond belief.

00:09:43.000 But they probably knew that he started that shit and he was a dick.

00:09:47.000 He not only hated the inmates, he hated the people he worked with.

00:09:50.000 And he was a notorious crackhead.

00:09:52.000 He ended up dying, but...

00:09:53.000 Was this person of African-American descent?

00:09:55.000 Yes.

00:09:56.000 Quinky Dink!

00:09:56.000 Oh.

00:09:57.000 You could have an aneurysm on the toilet!

00:10:00.000 You never know.

00:10:03.000 Yeah, but you know, I got like, I don't know, 30 days keep lock or whatever that, you know, 30 days.

00:10:09.000 30 days?

00:10:10.000 What's 30 days?

00:10:11.000 Was that state or federal?

00:10:12.000 No, I was in county jail at the time.

00:10:14.000 Oh.

00:10:16.000 Yeah, I never got into a fight with a... I got into an argument with a couple of federal COs, but the state never had a beef with them.

00:10:23.000 But the state, they'll fuck you up with them sticks.

00:10:27.000 I'm going tomorrow.

00:10:29.000 They carry night sticks, though.

00:10:30.000 I'm going Saturday.

00:10:32.000 The last visit.

00:10:33.000 Max and John get out in March.

00:10:36.000 They want one more visit.

00:10:37.000 But I was just saying to my wife, the funny thing about going there is it's a fucking boring drive.

00:10:42.000 It's six hours.

00:10:43.000 So you bring some whiskey.

00:10:45.000 You're not driving.

00:10:46.000 The other guys don't go ratting me out to the state troopers.

00:10:49.000 Not that I have to worry.

00:10:50.000 I've got state trooper badges.

00:10:51.000 I can fucking murder a prosecutor.

00:10:54.000 Um, but you, so you drink whiskey, you get there, you party that night, go to a bar or something in Albany on the way, so you get to bed at like 2, then you gotta get up at 6, so you get to the jail and the prison and you're like,

00:11:10.000 You're hungover as shit, in a bad mood, totally exhausted, and you're like, uh, so hey, what's going on?

00:11:18.000 Uh, you, uh, you getting out soon or whatever?

00:11:21.000 You want some fucking vending machine shit, I guess?

00:11:23.000 Yeah, bring your quarters in a plastic bag.

00:11:25.000 I guess I gotta empty my fucking wallet, microwaving a burger for you, and get you some damn Doritos!

00:11:32.000 Yeah.

00:11:33.000 And they're so happy that you're there.

00:11:34.000 They're like, oh, I got this story.

00:11:35.000 So this guy started a fight with that guy and blah, blah, blah.

00:11:38.000 They know, I want to color this up to make you come back.

00:11:41.000 They don't want to be boring.

00:11:42.000 So they're doing the shucking and jiving, and you're just like, whatever.

00:11:48.000 That's so shitty.

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00:14:05.000 We're joined by a 70-something woman named Sylvia who grew up in the Bronx.

00:14:11.000 She's had nine husbands.

00:14:15.000 She had some crazy times in her youth.

00:14:19.000 She's quite raunchy.

00:14:20.000 She describes herself as an American slut, but she's also a Jew for Jesus.

00:14:25.000 And then we have Tim and Neil, state troopers for many years.

00:14:28.000 Tim was a NYPD cop for a minute.

00:14:31.000 Neil is looking at only fans of an 18-year-old girl who has spina bifida.

00:14:38.000 Which is weird, at the very least.

00:14:40.000 It's legal.

00:14:41.000 Legal, though.

00:14:41.000 Perfectly legal.

00:14:43.000 Neil, were you ever a non-trooper?

00:14:45.000 Did you do anything before trooping?

00:14:47.000 I did.

00:14:47.000 Right out of high school, I went in the Army.

00:14:49.000 Ah.

00:14:50.000 So you went Army state trooper and Tim went NYPD state trooper.

00:14:54.000 College.

00:14:55.000 NYPD state trooper.

00:14:56.000 Yeah.

00:14:57.000 Yeah.

00:14:58.000 And why'd you quit the NYPD?

00:15:01.000 To become a state trooper.

00:15:02.000 You know what I want to do?

00:15:04.000 I want to get a round table where that thing is and have like seven cops.

00:15:09.000 Hmm.

00:15:10.000 That'd be cool.

00:15:11.000 I could get you those cops.

00:15:13.000 Because they're itching to tell their stories.

00:15:16.000 Sounds good.

00:15:17.000 And if they were around in the early 90s, their stories fucking rule.

00:15:24.000 So if that's the case, I gotta come packing.

00:15:27.000 Yeah, you should come packing.

00:15:29.000 Fudge packing.

00:15:30.000 What are you packing?

00:15:32.000 What did you say?

00:15:33.000 What are you packing?

00:15:35.000 You gotta be kidding me.

00:15:36.000 I implied the officers would be having ineffective.

00:15:38.000 I'm wondering what Sylvia's packing.

00:15:40.000 You'll find out.

00:15:42.000 Wait, shit is going well in Westchester for guns these days, right?

00:15:46.000 Well, New York State in general.

00:15:48.000 Yeah.

00:15:50.000 You take the course.

00:15:51.000 Guy at the gym was telling me, look, take the course.

00:15:53.000 My buddy will set you up.

00:15:54.000 There's a liberal judge who occasionally shuts people down.

00:15:57.000 You just wait and you go back to this other judge.

00:16:01.000 Well, now it used to be in New York state.

00:16:02.000 I mean, you used to have like a, have to have a reason like business carry or hunting and target.

00:16:09.000 And then that's in Westchester.

00:16:10.000 It was tough.

00:16:11.000 But once you get into like Rockley and Orange putting them like outside of it, it's a little easier.

00:16:16.000 You know what else I heard?

00:16:17.000 If you have the Westchester carry permit and you're caught in New York... Nobody's allowed.

00:16:22.000 I know you're not allowed, but it's not the apocalypse.

00:16:25.000 No.

00:16:25.000 They're just like, ah dude, you gotta get out of here.

00:16:27.000 It's only a violation of your pistol permit.

00:16:31.000 You didn't break the law.

00:16:32.000 It's not criminal possession of a weapon.

00:16:34.000 Right.

00:16:34.000 You only violated the terms of your pistol permit.

00:16:37.000 And the cop is probably just gonna go, shoo.

00:16:40.000 Yeah.

00:16:41.000 Yeah, I remember when I was an NYPD cop, I remember stopping, like, armed guards that are only supposed to carry on duty, but they have it off duty.

00:16:50.000 Shoo.

00:16:52.000 But I thought cops have to carry guns at all times, because they're always on duty.

00:16:56.000 He was an armored car driver.

00:16:57.000 Oh, armored car, right.

00:16:58.000 So he had it for work only.

00:17:01.000 There's a guy at my gym, Tommy Bags, and he's got a carry permit, finally, and he boxes like a lunatic.

00:17:09.000 Three rounds of rope, three rounds of speed bag, four rounds of shadow, then slip rope, and now he's ready to spar for five rounds.

00:17:19.000 He's a monster.

00:17:21.000 And I've fought him, fought him, I've been beaten up by him before.

00:17:24.000 He sweats so much that the sweat will hit you and like go in your eye and go in your mouth.

00:17:29.000 I guess I've fucked him in that sense.

00:17:33.000 And when he's hitting the bags in the summer, the coaches will come over with a mop and mop under him.

00:17:38.000 But anyway, I just think, what a waste that you've never been robbed.

00:17:42.000 Like, you're armed, you're a fucking ninja.

00:17:45.000 One of you bitches dump me?

00:17:48.000 Like, I want some dudes to jump him.

00:17:50.000 He does the Bronx, the South Bronx, he does Staten Island, he does the East Village.

00:17:55.000 Like, jump him!

00:17:56.000 He's not an easy target.

00:17:57.000 He's not a victim.

00:17:58.000 Well yeah, that's what my wife says about sexual assault.

00:18:02.000 And this is a dangerous subject to get into because it implies that the victim's had it coming.

00:18:07.000 But my wife goes, I've never been assaulted sexually or like raped or any kind of bad thing because I give off a vibe of like, don't even think about it.

00:18:17.000 And it's the same when you walk around New York City these days, you puff out your chest and you don't have headphones on and you're like, what?

00:18:25.000 And you don't get, you don't get accosted.

00:18:28.000 Just be aware of your situation.

00:18:30.000 Situation awareness is key.

00:18:32.000 And this is where it gets dark and evil.

00:18:34.000 Is that why you're scared of your wife, Gavin?

00:18:38.000 Sort of.

00:18:39.000 It's actually beneficial to be married to a cunt.

00:18:42.000 Because when you wet the bed, she doesn't notice because she doesn't come over to that side.

00:18:49.000 We killed all the nice Indians.

00:18:52.000 So I wet the bed.

00:18:53.000 I go, I get a towel.

00:18:54.000 I put it down.

00:18:55.000 I lie on that.

00:18:56.000 It absorbs a lot.

00:18:57.000 I throw it under the bed.

00:18:58.000 I go get another one.

00:18:59.000 It's usually three or four towels.

00:19:00.000 But you're peeing in bed because you're scared of her.

00:19:04.000 Right?

00:19:05.000 No, I'm peeing in bed because of my piss bed sponsor, Makers Mark.

00:19:11.000 Makers Mark hates Tempur-Pedic mattresses and they're at war.

00:19:15.000 So they sponsor me to destroy my Tempur-Pedic mattress.

00:19:19.000 No, I haven't wet the bed in like a year though.

00:19:20.000 I'm pretty proud of myself.

00:19:22.000 Oh yeah, wowee.

00:19:24.000 Yeah, when did you last wet the bed?

00:19:25.000 You should be proud, Gavin.

00:19:28.000 That's very good.

00:19:31.000 So you talk with your eyes, Mr. Printer?

00:19:33.000 What's your name?

00:19:34.000 I've never met you before.

00:19:35.000 I'm Printy the Printer!

00:19:37.000 Printy the Printer.

00:19:38.000 Yep.

00:19:38.000 And you talk with your eyeballs.

00:19:41.000 No, no, no.

00:19:42.000 My mouth is a scanner, but my eyes are attached, so... I understand that it looks that way, but it's not.

00:19:48.000 So what comes... What do you print out of?

00:19:52.000 Your Colombian necktie?

00:19:54.000 What do the papers come out of?

00:19:56.000 That's my chin.

00:19:56.000 I'm growing a beard.

00:20:01.000 Oh, okay.

00:20:02.000 So these papers are really beard hairs.

00:20:06.000 Yeah.

00:20:07.000 Okay.

00:20:08.000 So it's eyes, mouth, and then these long beard chin papers.

00:20:14.000 Yeah.

00:20:15.000 The original word for printer was print hairs and that's, you know, when it got small, when it came to the Ellis Island, they shortened it to printers and then so they lost the translation, but it's print hairs, you see.

00:20:27.000 Okay.

00:20:28.000 Yeah.

00:20:28.000 It's very Bill Schultz fucking red eye.

00:20:32.000 Do you remember that?

00:20:32.000 The New York Times did that joke, but good.

00:20:37.000 Well, I'm sure he had writers.

00:20:39.000 I'm sure they had writers.

00:20:43.000 I have an important Need of Fashions announcement, by the way.

00:20:45.000 You may have noticed that I wear suits 99.9% of the time, and my suits are made by Need of Fashions.

00:20:50.000 Those are my tailors.

00:20:52.000 I sell it as tailors for cheap, rich guys.

00:20:58.000 I was introduced to them by a producer at Fox who noticed I had my top button undone.

00:21:03.000 And he goes, dude, you look like a piece of shit with your top button undone with a tie.

00:21:08.000 Unless you're a lawyer and you're working on a long case and you have a pizza box there, you can undo your shit and have the tie hanging down.

00:21:17.000 But a real man, especially at a wedding, for fuck's sake, you do your top button and your top button shouldn't be strangling you.

00:21:24.000 And that's what a tailored shirt brings you.

00:21:26.000 So anyway, if you're in London, innit, don't muck about.

00:21:29.000 Don't be a fucking dumb geez.

00:21:32.000 Don't be a wanker.

00:21:33.000 They're in London 31st of January, 4th of February.

00:21:37.000 So end of Jan, right?

00:21:39.000 Beginning Feb this year.

00:21:41.000 They're at the Intercontinental London Park Lane.

00:21:46.000 So you set up an appointment, go over there.

00:21:48.000 I find it's best to contact them through Instagram DMs.

00:21:52.000 And you go, oy geese, don't muck about.

00:21:54.000 Sound is a pound.

00:21:55.000 I want to come by, get measured, so you have my fucking blueprint.

00:22:00.000 And then, when it's time for me to get a suit... See, the setup is fun.

00:22:05.000 It's like you're being catered to, you feel like a monarch.

00:22:08.000 And then they have your shit.

00:22:10.000 So then you can just like email them and go, I want like a blue shirt.

00:22:15.000 Boom.

00:22:15.000 It's in the mail.

00:22:16.000 FedEx from Hong Kong.

00:22:17.000 Why don't you support American business?

00:22:19.000 Oh, I don't know.

00:22:20.000 Cause an American tailored suit is $7,000, maybe 3000.

00:22:25.000 If you're a cheapskate, these guys will make you a suit for 800 bucks, a shirt for 50 bucks.

00:22:31.000 And then what happens is you get hooked and you start wanting higher quality.

00:22:35.000 So you go up to like a hundred dollars shirt and a thousand dollars suit.

00:22:38.000 But I'm telling you, man, once you get this suit that you helped design, by the way, you design, you say, I want this button here, this fucking lining.

00:22:48.000 It's PJs.

00:22:48.000 It's comfier than work clothes.

00:22:51.000 I saw there was an article about blue collar chic online and I contacted the writer and I go, hey cunt lips, you fucking talk about something I invented, blue collar chic, and you steal the concept.

00:23:10.000 I just did this video a few months ago and you don't even fucking credit me.

00:23:14.000 Fuck you.

00:23:15.000 I'm going to kill your family in front of you on Christmas morning.

00:23:19.000 And she goes, I wrote that article in 2021.

00:23:22.000 That holds up?

00:23:29.000 You know what my comeback to that was?

00:23:33.000 What?

00:23:34.000 Touche, my dear.

00:23:36.000 Touche.

00:23:37.000 What month?

00:23:39.000 That's officially the end of our debate.

00:23:43.000 You used the term before then.

00:23:48.000 Did I?

00:23:48.000 Yes.

00:23:49.000 Yeah.

00:23:49.000 I heard you say that a million times.

00:23:52.000 Like around 2021?

00:23:54.000 Call her back.

00:23:54.000 A year ago?

00:23:58.000 2023.

00:23:59.000 Maybe not.

00:24:00.000 I think she won.

00:24:02.000 Some pachyderm.

00:24:04.000 Her idea is totally different.

00:24:06.000 Well, no, it's very similar.

00:24:08.000 No, the term exists, but almost not at all.

00:24:12.000 Like if you look it up, you'll see a link from 1993, you'll see a link in 94.

00:24:17.000 Like hipsters, I invented hipsters.

00:24:19.000 The term hipster comes from the 20s, but as far as like popularizing it, I did that in the early aughts.

00:24:28.000 You know, you can't, who said this?

00:24:30.000 I think it was Owen Wilson, actually, who I broke up with, but he said, it's very freeing to give up on the idea of copyright and ownership.

00:24:39.000 I mean, I'm sure in business it's important, but I want the ideas to get out there.

00:24:44.000 I want people to get married.

00:24:45.000 I want them to have kids, put a ring on it.

00:24:47.000 I want them to get a trade.

00:24:48.000 I don't want them to go to secondary education.

00:24:52.000 I want that to become popularized.

00:24:54.000 I don't own those things.

00:24:56.000 And as long as they get out there, I'm happy because America is a better place to be.

00:25:01.000 Is America worse?

00:25:03.000 I know we're living in clown world and young girls are cutting their tits off, but you know, 1992 David Dinkins New York was a fucking zoo.

00:25:14.000 So I'm of two minds about it.

00:25:17.000 On one hand, I believe like the guys in my Knights of Columbus group in Hell's Kitchen, the 70 year olds are like, we're on the back nine.

00:25:24.000 I feel sorry for your kids.

00:25:25.000 It's over.

00:25:27.000 But at the same time, I'm like, you guys lived in hell.

00:25:30.000 Oh, the 90s were the best.

00:25:32.000 But Hell's Kitchen?

00:25:33.000 The Westies?

00:25:34.000 Oh, I used to go to nightclubbing.

00:25:37.000 1018, 10th Avenue and 18th Street?

00:25:38.000 Fuck yeah.

00:25:39.000 Okay.

00:25:40.000 I mean, it only had the highest murder rate, 2,600 a year.

00:25:43.000 But go 20 blocks up, and fucking the Westies are shooting someone in the head because they bumped into their car.

00:25:50.000 That's when Times Square was Times Square.

00:25:52.000 Yeah.

00:25:53.000 That was bad.

00:25:55.000 Even in the... I moved here in the late 90s, and there was still like fucking whores and... Yeah, but it wasn't as bad as it seems.

00:26:02.000 At least it didn't when you were there.

00:26:05.000 Well that's true of like South Africa today.

00:26:07.000 You could probably go to Soweto today and not get raped to death.

00:26:10.000 It doesn't mean it's good.

00:26:11.000 There's 20 million pitbulls in America.

00:26:14.000 There's only 20 kids murdered by them a year.

00:26:17.000 I still don't like pitbulls.

00:26:20.000 I'm sure the BLM and Tifa riots were mostly peaceful.

00:26:25.000 Out of the fucking eight billion of them, we only lost like a hundred statues and 320 CVS's.

00:26:37.000 I mean, World War One!

00:26:39.000 The odds were pretty good you're not gonna die.

00:26:42.000 It still sucked shit.

00:26:46.000 Hundreds of thousands died.

00:26:49.000 Being a Jew during the Holocaust.

00:26:51.000 I mean, 300,000 Jews were killed in the Holocaust.

00:26:55.000 Six million.

00:26:57.000 Six million, I'm sorry.

00:26:58.000 They always fuck that up.

00:27:02.000 Good morning.

00:27:05.000 Okay, so this is the show where we take calls, we trivialize genocide, and we read emails.

00:27:13.000 I go through every single email.

00:27:15.000 Takes me about an hour a day.

00:27:16.000 You guys are real chatty.

00:27:19.000 And by the way, there's certain people who send like seven a day.

00:27:22.000 I don't even read your fucking emails, dude.

00:27:26.000 We're not friends.

00:27:27.000 You're sending me emails like I send Maddie and Tim texts.

00:27:33.000 Like, stop doing that.

00:27:36.000 And they're not even good.

00:27:38.000 It's like, check this out.

00:27:40.000 This tiny Chinese guy.

00:27:42.000 It's Ryan.

00:27:43.000 Yes.

00:27:44.000 I'm familiar with that video and we already showed it on the show.

00:27:47.000 Apparently you don't watch the show.

00:27:51.000 That's not funny.

00:27:52.000 Stop.

00:27:53.000 So we also do a

00:27:58.000 Super Chat, where we raise money for Max and John, who are in jail for four years, the guys I'm visiting on Saturday.

00:28:05.000 We squeeze both in in one day.

00:28:10.000 And we see their parents there sometimes.

00:28:12.000 And they go, I used to hate you guys, but thank God you stuck around.

00:28:16.000 You know what I say to them?

00:28:17.000 Fuck you.

00:28:20.000 You doubted my loyalty.

00:28:22.000 I shove him.

00:28:25.000 Did I tell you,

00:28:28.000 My, my, uh, I don't know how to say this, not plan, I'm never doing this, but it's very easy to smuggle shit into prison.

00:28:36.000 Have you this whole time?

00:28:38.000 Well, you don't have to put anything up your fucking ass, although you could do that.

00:28:41.000 Oh, getting it in, in, well the inmate has to.

00:28:43.000 I've said this on the show, I know I repeat myself, sorry, go to a Rolling Stones concert, they play Satisfaction, okay?

00:28:50.000 You sit down on the bench, you take your boots off,

00:28:55.000 You drop your Swiss Army knife by your boots.

00:28:59.000 They take your boots.

00:29:01.000 They analyze your boots.

00:29:02.000 You take off your watch, all your shit.

00:29:04.000 You do all that shit.

00:29:05.000 They check everything is fine.

00:29:06.000 You go through the screener twice.

00:29:09.000 Then you go through this weird tube in another hallway.

00:29:13.000 You walk by that.

00:29:14.000 I don't know if that's drugs, whatever that is.

00:29:17.000 And then they go, OK, you're good.

00:29:20.000 Now I got to put my boots back on.

00:29:22.000 Well, I got to sit down.

00:29:23.000 They ever swab your hands?

00:29:26.000 I think they may have swabbed my hands, yep.

00:29:29.000 Um, I gotta sit down to put my boots back on.

00:29:31.000 I sit down on the same bench I took them off on, put the Swiss Army knife back in my boot, and you don't go through security for that final part.

00:29:40.000 You just walk right in.

00:29:41.000 Sounds good in theory.

00:29:42.000 I could have heroin, I could have fuckin' razor blades.

00:29:47.000 Sounds good in theory.

00:29:48.000 And then, once I'm in there, giving it to him is easy peasy, because I'm microwaving hamburgers for him, I'm getting him Doritos and Gatorade and shit.

00:29:57.000 So as soon as I hand that over... And then they gotta get strip-searched.

00:30:01.000 Going back to their cell block.

00:30:03.000 Ooh.

00:30:03.000 Hole in the plot.

00:30:04.000 Yeah.

00:30:05.000 I was gonna say, it's easy to get it in the visiting room.

00:30:09.000 He's gotta get strip-searched.

00:30:10.000 Bend over and spread him.

00:30:12.000 They bend over and spread him for every single prison visit?

00:30:17.000 Every single one.

00:30:18.000 Bottom of your feet.

00:30:19.000 Bend down.

00:30:20.000 Cough.

00:30:21.000 Lift your nuts.

00:30:21.000 Lift your dick.

00:30:23.000 Open your mouth.

00:30:23.000 Run your hands through your hair.

00:30:26.000 You name it.

00:30:26.000 Touché, Matty.

00:30:27.000 Touché.

00:30:28.000 Bend over and spread them.

00:30:32.000 Well, my other idea is... In the state system in New York, they would call you have to boof it.

00:30:37.000 Twin brothers.

00:30:39.000 Who?

00:30:40.000 Twin brothers.

00:30:41.000 I go there with my twin brother.

00:30:42.000 He... How are you going to change places?

00:30:49.000 They don't really look at you that much.

00:30:51.000 You can't wear any color clothing that matches inmate clothing.

00:30:56.000 I have it under my sweatpants.

00:30:59.000 I slowly remove my sweatpants.

00:31:01.000 I have my inmate clothing.

00:31:03.000 In the VI.

00:31:04.000 In the VI room.

00:31:06.000 Yeah, I... I can't remember what I thought with my beard.

00:31:10.000 We'd have to look exactly the same.

00:31:12.000 Anyway, we somehow change clothing and then my twin brother walks out wearing my clothes and I go back to his cell.

00:31:23.000 I told the CO this once and he's like, eh, we still got a body.

00:31:27.000 Technically, that's all they would care about.

00:31:29.000 But I think it's conceivable you could switch out a twin brother.

00:31:33.000 Mmm, no.

00:31:35.000 Why not?

00:31:35.000 How no?

00:31:36.000 How no?

00:31:37.000 Because they're in the visiting room with you, watching.

00:31:40.000 They're not watching.

00:31:41.000 They are, but they are.

00:31:42.000 They're not as far away as my office is.

00:31:44.000 Okay.

00:31:46.000 And they got their shit.

00:31:47.000 They're looking at shit.

00:31:48.000 People are doing click clicks.

00:31:50.000 Oh yeah, time for click click.

00:31:52.000 They call pictures click clicks.

00:31:54.000 What are you, aboriginals?

00:31:56.000 We want to do the click click.

00:31:58.000 Time for click click.

00:31:59.000 The white man has a machine that can take your soul.

00:32:03.000 He do a click click.

00:32:05.000 Get your Polaroids.

00:32:08.000 Have you guys ever been to a prison?

00:32:11.000 Yeah.

00:32:12.000 Did you ever send a guy to prison?

00:32:14.000 Yeah.

00:32:15.000 Yeah.

00:32:15.000 Who?

00:32:17.000 Timothy Handel.

00:32:19.000 What did he do?

00:32:20.000 Look him up.

00:32:21.000 Google him.

00:32:22.000 Okay.

00:32:23.000 You both put him in prison.

00:32:25.000 Ah, Neil, this is Neil's.

00:32:26.000 This is a good one.

00:32:27.000 Timothy Hindell.

00:32:29.000 He was the worst speeder in the history of 95.

00:32:31.000 Yep.

00:32:33.000 And he didn't wear a seatbelt.

00:32:35.000 He had the wrong sticker on his license plate three years in a row!

00:32:39.000 And he was gay.

00:32:42.000 And he wouldn't comply.

00:32:44.000 Yeah, we were talking about that before the show.

00:32:46.000 There's so many fucking videos you watch where you're like, dude, I'm on your side.

00:32:52.000 I do think it was stupid that the cops pulled you over for having a bicycle without a light on, but just fucking comply, please?

00:33:01.000 Like, I made a t-shirt once that said, Just Seize.

00:33:06.000 And it was Archie Bunker just as a cop.

00:33:08.000 And the whole point was like, hate the cop's guts.

00:33:13.000 Go bananas!

00:33:14.000 Hate him to his core.

00:33:16.000 Want his entire family to die of cancer.

00:33:19.000 That's fine, that's up to you.

00:33:21.000 But you're not gonna like, outsmart him, outwit him, like make him cry.

00:33:26.000 You're not gonna win this.

00:33:28.000 So,

00:33:29.000 Take notes, if you want to file a lawsuit, you know, you got that all in your head.

00:33:34.000 He shoved me, this was bullshit.

00:33:37.000 When you're getting cuffed up, document it all mentally, but this whole like, this is fucked up!

00:33:43.000 Like, what's he gonna do?

00:33:44.000 Go, alright, sorry man.

00:33:48.000 Inevitable doom.

00:33:50.000 It's inevitable, it's happening.

00:33:53.000 And as a taxpayer, I obviously want it to happen.

00:33:56.000 I don't want a society where I pay taxes and the lawmakers are one fuck you away, or the law enforcers are one fuck you away from going like, okay, fuck, calm down.

00:34:06.000 We'll let you go, shit.

00:34:07.000 I didn't know you were gonna get all mad.

00:34:12.000 How do you spell his last name?

00:34:13.000 Yeah, I'm not getting it here.

00:34:15.000 H-A-N-D-E-L.

00:34:17.000 Timothy Handel, New Windsor.

00:34:19.000 Ryan should be familiar with New Windsor.

00:34:20.000 Gotcha, yes I am.

00:34:21.000 The Windsor?

00:34:22.000 New Windsor.

00:34:24.000 Not the old Windsor.

00:34:25.000 There's some fucking shitholes upstate.

00:34:28.000 Oh, it was a murder.

00:34:31.000 Oh, it's Handel!

00:34:32.000 Timothy Handel.

00:34:33.000 You get his name wrong?

00:34:33.000 Okay, hold on, hold on.

00:34:34.000 I hate when the media does this.

00:34:35.000 She was being a complete bitch.

00:34:37.000 Can they totally gloss over that?

00:34:38.000 Does that stand up in court?

00:34:59.000 Yes!

00:35:01.000 Objection.

00:35:01.000 This is a good one.

00:35:03.000 Your Honor, I was getting a lot of this.

00:35:08.000 What am I supposed to do?

00:35:09.000 Not dismember her?

00:35:12.000 A jury convicted Handel of murdering Connelly, then dismembering and burying her body in the backyard of a New Windsor residence.

00:35:19.000 The sentence also covers his conviction for concealing evidence.

00:35:23.000 Handel did not speak at his sentencing.

00:35:25.000 Sorry, can I say one other thing?

00:35:28.000 When you dismember your girlfriend, there's so much stigma in this society that you can't have a normal funeral.

00:35:36.000 The parents don't want to go.

00:35:37.000 The media will show up and be like, this is bullshit, blah, blah, blah.

00:35:42.000 So you basically have no choice but to put her in the lawn.

00:35:46.000 Using six pieces.

00:35:47.000 Oof.

00:35:48.000 What are the six pieces?

00:35:50.000 Six pieces.

00:35:51.000 Five limbs and one head.

00:35:52.000 Torso and head.

00:35:55.000 A couple legs and one of the legs was cut in half.

00:35:58.000 He froze her in a chest freezer.

00:36:03.000 Couldn't get her out of there.

00:36:04.000 She was kind of a big woman.

00:36:05.000 So he cut her up with a sawzall and thankfully left his rubber gloves and sawzall blades in the hole buried with her.

00:36:16.000 But that seems kind of smart.

00:36:20.000 No?

00:36:20.000 We don't catch the smart ones.

00:36:22.000 No, I'm not kidding though.

00:36:23.000 Like, what should I have done with this sawzall blade in the glass?

00:36:25.000 I guess a different hole.

00:36:27.000 Throw it in the Hudson or something.

00:36:28.000 Yeah, there you go.

00:36:29.000 How'd they end up locating the body?

00:36:30.000 We found her.

00:36:32.000 How?

00:36:32.000 We found her in the backyard.

00:36:33.000 It was several steps involved.

00:36:36.000 Look how curious Matty is.

00:36:37.000 He's sweating like a pig.

00:36:46.000 Remember, we don't catch the smart ones.

00:36:47.000 So doing some work on it, we found out that he rented a backhoe, paid for cash, and had some fresh dug up earth in the back of the place he was living at.

00:36:58.000 I know a guy who killed 32 people.

00:37:01.000 I want to add to the landlord.

00:37:02.000 The landlord, he used to live at this apartment.

00:37:06.000 They were from Lancaster, Pennsylvania.

00:37:07.000 We're not sure where he killed her, right?

00:37:11.000 In Pennsylvania.

00:37:12.000 Oh, he did do it in Pennsylvania.

00:37:13.000 So he freezed her, froze her, drove her back to New York to an apartment that he used to live in, called his landlord, said, hey, is that apartment still available?

00:37:21.000 She was in Colorado.

00:37:23.000 He said, yeah, the key's where it always is.

00:37:26.000 She gets home, he's already moved in, and he had moved her shed.

00:37:32.000 So what he did was he buried Kathleen, put her shed over the hole, over where he disturbed the earth.

00:37:41.000 She came back, thought that was a little weird.

00:37:42.000 He made up some excuse.

00:37:43.000 He had a big F-350 diesel pickup.

00:37:45.000 He says, oh, I couldn't turn the truck around, so I moved your shed.

00:37:48.000 I hope that's OK.

00:37:50.000 She thought that was weird.

00:37:50.000 And then when we contacted her and told her

00:37:55.000 What was going on, she immediately said, oh my God, he moved.

00:37:58.000 She knew immediately that she was buried under there.

00:38:00.000 She goes, the shed's moved, there's dirt disturbed.

00:38:02.000 That was basically how it was.

00:38:04.000 He cut the three people up and he left, I guess he didn't disrobe them.

00:38:09.000 And the guy's cell phone was in his jacket pocket and they pinged the phone.

00:38:14.000 Well, that sounds retarded.

00:38:16.000 But call me dumb, this guy doesn't sound so dumb.

00:38:20.000 Like freezing her, then cutting her up.

00:38:23.000 Hey, he thought it through.

00:38:23.000 And then putting her in... Renting a backhoe, I guess, was dumb.

00:38:27.000 Ever heard of a fucking shovel?

00:38:29.000 This is the best, though.

00:38:30.000 Imagine this.

00:38:31.000 He's sitting there, right?

00:38:32.000 So they let Neil stand behind him.

00:38:35.000 No.

00:38:36.000 On the couch.

00:38:37.000 When he's on the couch.

00:38:39.000 I was out by the hole.

00:38:40.000 There were two other guys.

00:38:42.000 Alright, but what about when the backhoe's coming down the driveway?

00:38:44.000 Neil, show some respect for fuck's sake.

00:38:46.000 No, I just wanted to be accurate.

00:38:47.000 No, you're saying you're out by the hoe.

00:38:49.000 You don't know what this woman's lifestyle was like to call her a hoe after she's dead.

00:38:53.000 A garden tool?

00:38:55.000 I know.

00:38:55.000 That doesn't matter.

00:38:58.000 They're executing a search warrant in his backyard.

00:39:00.000 Correct.

00:39:01.000 And he's watching the Yankee game and he has to act all nonchalant.

00:39:04.000 He's sitting on the couch with his feet up like, yeah, whatever, whatever you guys want to do.

00:39:07.000 Why would I care?

00:39:09.000 The window behind the TV is where we're digging.

00:39:12.000 He sees a backhoe coming down his driveway.

00:39:14.000 Doesn't even raise an eyebrow like, what the fuck's going on?

00:39:18.000 He's just like,

00:39:19.000 Like, just stay calm.

00:39:21.000 Dude, the farts in that room.

00:39:23.000 I don't want to be in that room.

00:39:24.000 That fucking room must have reeked.

00:39:27.000 It's crazy.

00:39:29.000 I think for anybody to dismember a human body, especially somebody you know, is very inhumane.

00:39:38.000 You're an animal.

00:39:40.000 You're a fucking animal.

00:39:41.000 That's the great thing about Sylvia, is we get the other side of the argument.

00:39:47.000 And, yeah, that's kind of a wake-up call.

00:39:50.000 Dismembering someone.

00:39:52.000 Oh, that'll wake you up.

00:39:53.000 Thumbs down.

00:39:55.000 So, he's sitting there shitting his pants.

00:39:59.000 There's a dismembered girlfriend.

00:40:03.000 Oh, he testified at his trial.

00:40:06.000 Oh, he did?

00:40:06.000 He testified.

00:40:08.000 Well, his testimony was that he came home after a custody battle.

00:40:14.000 After she pointed a shotgun at him, he took the kids and left, and when he came back, she was hanging from a rafter in the garage.

00:40:20.000 Okay, sounds great.

00:40:23.000 Why didn't you call the cops?

00:40:24.000 Exactly.

00:40:25.000 If there's one thing I do when my ex-wife has hanged herself, it's like, well, better get her frozen up!

00:40:32.000 Red tobacco!

00:40:33.000 I mean, maybe that would be a good argument in 1676.

00:40:40.000 Actually, even then, no.

00:40:41.000 You gotta call the fucking sheriff and say, my old lady hanged herself.

00:40:49.000 Wow.

00:40:49.000 So what did he get?

00:40:51.000 He got 25 to life.

00:40:54.000 Now, you're a state trooper.

00:40:55.000 I don't understand.

00:40:56.000 Was he speeding after he buried the body?

00:40:58.000 He wasn't wearing a seatbelt.

00:41:01.000 Improper disposal of it.

00:41:03.000 And he was DWI.

00:41:04.000 That's the only thing that matters.

00:41:06.000 No, but seriously, how did... He got a check to welfare call.

00:41:10.000 Oh, how the call came in?

00:41:11.000 Yeah.

00:41:12.000 Yeah.

00:41:12.000 So the grandmother of the two kids, Katie Conley's, the victim's mother called, Hey, I haven't heard from my daughter in a couple of weeks.

00:41:21.000 I'm concerned for my granddaughters.

00:41:22.000 Could you check on the welfare?

00:41:25.000 And you go talk to, and I mean, there's a ton of information that I don't want to bore you to death, but spidey senses go up and I just started working it from there.

00:41:33.000 Huh.

00:41:34.000 So state troopers, like, excuse my ignorance, but what are your parameters?

00:41:39.000 Well, New Windsor probably doesn't have a police department.

00:41:42.000 Listen, it's everything.

00:41:44.000 Anywhere in the state, a state trooper, like on Long Island, pretty much all they do is cover the parkways.

00:41:49.000 But there are parts of New York State where there's no other police agency, so they do everything.

00:41:52.000 Yeah, we do everything.

00:41:53.000 It's a full service agency.

00:41:54.000 You're sort of like the National Guard of Police.

00:41:57.000 For New York.

00:41:59.000 Um, everything from accidents to... There are some states... Like, wouldn't the local police be doing a welfare check?

00:42:06.000 She called the state police instead.

00:42:07.000 There's the state police, there's the local police, and there's the sheriff's department.

00:42:10.000 She could have called either one.

00:42:12.000 But wouldn't you guys go, hey, state police, we got a call about some chick who's not around.

00:42:18.000 I gotta go catch speeders.

00:42:20.000 Go look into it.

00:42:20.000 No.

00:42:21.000 No.

00:42:22.000 No, because like I said, there's certain parts of the state where we do everything.

00:42:25.000 You know, there's no other police department.

00:42:27.000 Some of the counties don't have sheriff's departments, or they only handle the jails.

00:42:31.000 So the state police do everything.

00:42:32.000 So we handle all criminal complaints.

00:42:37.000 Well, as long as my tax dollars are being well spent, I don't care.

00:42:37.000 All right.

00:42:41.000 I think we're number one in the state for, we do big homicide seminars, like homicide investigations, and we assist in all that stuff.

00:42:48.000 We have a major crimes unit in every troop.

00:42:50.000 Number one in the state for homicide?

00:42:52.000 Homicide investigate, like we teaching homicide investigations.

00:42:56.000 Because when I think of catching homicide, it's got to be East New York.

00:42:59.000 That must dominate the entire state.

00:43:01.000 NYPD, completely take them out of it.

00:43:03.000 They are completely self-sufficient.

00:43:06.000 I'm talking about the rest of the state, the rural parts of the state.

00:43:10.000 I read recently that America spent $40 million on murders in Manhattan.

00:43:10.000 Yeah, Murder Day.

00:43:19.000 No, not murders, sorry.

00:43:21.000 Bullet wounds.

00:43:22.000 Because when these guys in the South Bronx show up with a bullet hole, that's Medicaid and the federal government pays for that.

00:43:29.000 So someone in fucking Alabama is paying for someone's ops who got shot through the fucking liver, sewing them up, trying to fix it.

00:43:41.000 Forty million dollars.

00:43:43.000 Forty million dollars.

00:43:46.000 But no one understands how good medicine is now.

00:43:50.000 It's the same with war.

00:43:52.000 They go, oh, Afghanistan wasn't so bad.

00:43:54.000 It was only, what, 6,000 guys died?

00:43:57.000 Yeah, there's like fucking 20,000 dudes with no legs.

00:44:01.000 And burn victims and mental trauma because we're so good at fixing people.

00:44:06.000 In the Civil War, you got, you fucking stubbed your toe, you're dead.

00:44:10.000 Mm-hmm.

00:44:12.000 Jack Daniels.

00:44:12.000 Bite on the stick.

00:44:14.000 Yeah, bite on the stick.

00:44:15.000 That's how Jack Daniels died.

00:44:18.000 What happened with Jack Daniels?

00:44:19.000 He died, he stubbed his toe.

00:44:21.000 Is that true?

00:44:22.000 Is that how he died?

00:44:23.000 He kicked his safe, he couldn't get it open, he got gangrene and died.

00:44:23.000 Yeah, look it up.

00:44:27.000 Now I have a question.

00:44:29.000 The guy who built the Brooklyn Bridge, James, John Roebling, James Roebling, he fucking fucked up his foot and he was into this dumb water shit where you use water therapy to cure your ales and he was putting it in a tin pan as he treated his foot with this water therapy and he got tinnitus.

00:44:50.000 Dead.

00:44:51.000 Tinnitus?

00:44:52.000 No, not tonight.

00:44:53.000 Tonight's your year.

00:44:54.000 What's the other one?

00:44:55.000 Tetanus.

00:44:56.000 Tetanus.

00:44:56.000 Lockjaw.

00:44:57.000 Sylvia has a question.

00:44:59.000 Are there more murders in rural areas in New York or in the cities?

00:45:06.000 In the cities.

00:45:07.000 Yeah.

00:45:08.000 I don't know where the last... The Democrat-run cities.

00:45:12.000 That's where all your murders happen.

00:45:14.000 Yep.

00:45:14.000 I disagree.

00:45:15.000 Oh, look it up.

00:45:17.000 No, I don't have to look it up.

00:45:17.000 Murder is melanin, basically.

00:45:19.000 It's easier to get away with murder in rural areas.

00:45:22.000 Oh, I see your point.

00:45:23.000 Yeah, but there's more numbers-wise, there's more in the cities.

00:45:25.000 Oh, more people.

00:45:27.000 Yeah, more people, just, yeah.

00:45:29.000 No, but even per capita.

00:45:31.000 Oh, per capita.

00:45:32.000 I mean, murder, sorry, but it breaks down by racial grounds.

00:45:36.000 They go, it's poverty-related.

00:45:38.000 Not really.

00:45:39.000 Western Virginia's poor.

00:45:41.000 You don't see the kind of murder that you see in East New York.

00:45:45.000 What about Long Island?

00:45:46.000 All those dead hookers they found.

00:45:49.000 What?

00:45:49.000 Joel Rifkin.

00:45:51.000 There you go.

00:45:52.000 Troopers stopped him.

00:45:53.000 Yeah, stopped him.

00:45:54.000 He had a dead body in the back of his truck.

00:45:57.000 Wait, who are we talking about?

00:46:00.000 Joel Rifkin.

00:46:01.000 Joel Rifkin was stopped by a state trooper.

00:46:04.000 When he asked him what's in the back of the truck, he said, dead whore.

00:46:09.000 Well, that's the end of our investigation.

00:46:12.000 His truck is still in Farmingdale, at the State Police Headquarters in Farmingdale.

00:46:16.000 You can see it.

00:46:16.000 Pull in the front parking lot.

00:46:18.000 It's in the evidence thing, but it's right behind the fence.

00:46:21.000 Oh, I see him now.

00:46:22.000 He's still in prison.

00:46:23.000 I never heard of him before.

00:46:24.000 Yeah, he's still alive.

00:46:26.000 He dumped a body up in Cornwall.

00:46:28.000 I just killed a whore.

00:46:29.000 Why?

00:46:29.000 What's the problem, officer?

00:46:30.000 Black Rock Turnpike.

00:46:31.000 I mean, Black Rock Hunting Club.

00:46:33.000 32.

00:46:33.000 Right near there.

00:46:34.000 Yeah, yeah, I know.

00:46:35.000 My father used to belong there.

00:46:40.000 How many serial killers have you fellas had to deal with?

00:46:47.000 All of us?

00:46:48.000 Serial killers?

00:46:49.000 Yeah.

00:46:50.000 So I had to deal with Jeffrey Dahmer, the Hillside Strangler.

00:46:55.000 David Berkowitz, he's still alive.

00:46:56.000 I had to deal with David Berkowitz.

00:46:58.000 I've had to deal with about seven serial killers.

00:47:00.000 What about you guys?

00:47:01.000 What about the Boston Strangler?

00:47:05.000 I was his therapist.

00:47:06.000 Jack the Ripper?

00:47:08.000 They never found him.

00:47:10.000 Nathaniel White?

00:47:12.000 Jack the Ripper.

00:47:14.000 Jack the Ripper used to mutilate prostitutes.

00:47:17.000 Did he ever cut a child's tits off?

00:47:20.000 No, but that's what we do.

00:47:23.000 Jack the Ripper would blush if he could see the clown world we are in now.

00:47:29.000 Anthony and I were talking about this the other day, last night actually.

00:47:33.000 You take a girl's tits,

00:47:36.000 Which are very complicated.

00:47:37.000 They're like a man's balls.

00:47:38.000 It's not just a sack of meat.

00:47:40.000 It's not like a forearm.

00:47:42.000 It's a mammary glans.

00:47:46.000 All those little ducks, it looks like a dandelion in there.

00:47:49.000 It's not a minor thing to cut off a woman.

00:47:52.000 And the whole system with breastfeeding where she releases endorphins and all other chemicals when she's breastfeeding and it helps her recover from the birth and it gives the kids all these important nutrients they have.

00:48:07.000 That's not a minor thing to chop off.

00:48:09.000 Look at that thing!

00:48:12.000 It's more complicated than a dick.

00:48:15.000 And you shouldn't chop those off either.

00:48:17.000 God did not give us a lot of shit we can chop off.

00:48:20.000 Foreskins are arguable, I'm against that.

00:48:23.000 Earlobes, eh, you could probably... I don't know if it really helps you to hear with these things there.

00:48:29.000 You could probably lose those.

00:48:31.000 And what about circumcision?

00:48:33.000 Are you against that?

00:48:34.000 I'm passionately against circumcision.

00:48:37.000 I figured as much.

00:48:40.000 I'm against it, too.

00:48:41.000 I want mine back.

00:48:43.000 I find, and no offense, Tim, but I find it makes your dick taste weird.

00:48:46.000 That's just my personal opinion.

00:48:48.000 My body, my choice.

00:48:49.000 You didn't have a choice, did you?

00:48:51.000 No.

00:48:51.000 Fuck.

00:48:51.000 It makes your dick smaller.

00:48:54.000 Why would we do that?

00:48:56.000 I guess it technically is smaller.

00:48:57.000 My body, my choice.

00:48:58.000 Fuck.

00:48:59.000 But people go, oh, the kids don't feel it.

00:49:01.000 Ever seen a circumcision trade?

00:49:03.000 I heard my kids scream down the hall.

00:49:06.000 You heard your kid scream down the hall?

00:49:08.000 Yeah.

00:49:08.000 Oh, fuck.

00:49:09.000 That's horrific.

00:49:09.000 So wait, you're against it, but you did it to your son?

00:49:11.000 I wasn't against it.

00:49:13.000 I thought it was a medical thing.

00:49:14.000 I don't believe that.

00:49:15.000 Are you Googling circumcision right now, Neil?

00:49:18.000 Me?

00:49:18.000 It's when they cut off the foreskin.

00:49:22.000 You know what I'm looking up?

00:49:23.000 My favorite killer, Ed Kemper.

00:49:26.000 Oh, that's the Madison, Wisconsin guy, isn't it?

00:49:28.000 Yes.

00:49:29.000 Mother.

00:49:30.000 I always confused him with Ed Gein.

00:49:32.000 What did he do?

00:49:33.000 Ed Kemper.

00:49:33.000 He cut his own mother's head off and threw darts at it and fucked her throat.

00:49:38.000 He must have hated her.

00:49:39.000 He fucking hated his mother.

00:49:42.000 Again, one of the biggest bitches in history.

00:49:46.000 She was a fucking nightmare to deal with.

00:49:49.000 She had a gorgeous throat.

00:49:51.000 And the skin texture of her head was perfect for darts.

00:49:55.000 But the media never mentions that!

00:49:57.000 Ed Kemper!

00:49:59.000 Ed Kemper.

00:50:00.000 I've never heard of him.

00:50:00.000 Oh, you gotta look him up.

00:50:02.000 I'm looking him up right now.

00:50:03.000 Here he is.

00:50:03.000 He's a fucking champ.

00:50:04.000 What about Leslie Borden?

00:50:06.000 Oh, Ed Kemper?

00:50:08.000 He was a big bastard too.

00:50:09.000 Like a genius.

00:50:10.000 One of those high IQ...

00:50:15.000 Well those are the most disturbing ones, the Ted Kaczynski's when they have a point.

00:50:19.000 I don't like when they have a point.

00:50:22.000 He had an agenda.

00:50:24.000 Like you read the fucking, what's it called, the Ted Kaczynski book, the Unabomber Manifesto, and you're like, I'm having trouble poking holes in this.

00:50:34.000 What nobody ever talks about is how people just routinely remove the smallest part of the paper receiver tray and just rip it off!

00:50:45.000 It's sick.

00:50:48.000 Have you seen this folks?

00:50:50.000 It does have a function.

00:50:52.000 People rip it off.

00:50:52.000 They think they don't need it.

00:50:53.000 I'm having trouble getting over you speaking from your eyes.

00:50:58.000 But what if you have to produce a really long document?

00:51:03.000 Then you're screwed.

00:51:04.000 I think we may have to retire Printy.

00:51:08.000 I think he needs more friends.

00:51:11.000 I think this whole studio could be a bunch of friends of inanimate nature.

00:51:17.000 Alright, let's take some calls and read some letters and change the background.

00:51:22.000 I'm sick of seeing Megyn Kelly's face for hours and hours and hours.

00:51:28.000 Thanks for calling.

00:51:29.000 Yeah.

00:51:51.000 Yeah?

00:51:51.000 Thanks for calling.

00:51:53.000 We've already got four people online.

00:51:54.000 Sylvia, do you ever get anyone, like, come up to you on the street and go, holy shit, you're Sylvia.

00:51:59.000 Oh yeah, people for some odd reason never forget me.

00:52:04.000 I don't know why.

00:52:05.000 But I meant because of this show.

00:52:07.000 Oh, the show?

00:52:08.000 Yeah.

00:52:08.000 Yeah, I've had a couple of them come over to me.

00:52:11.000 What do they say?

00:52:14.000 They say they like the show because

00:52:21.000 All of us come out with whatever we think spontaneously.

00:52:26.000 It's not rehearsed.

00:52:27.000 You sound like you're lying right now.

00:52:28.000 It's not practiced.

00:52:29.000 We just, we just let it flow.

00:52:32.000 This doesn't sound true.

00:52:35.000 It doesn't sound what?

00:52:36.000 It sounds very rehearsed!

00:52:38.000 It sounds a little too perfect.

00:52:40.000 Nothing's perfect.

00:52:42.000 Everything's perfect.

00:52:43.000 Like a typical one, I got one last night, was like, hey man, I just want to say I don't agree with everything you say, but I respect that you speak your mind, blah blah blah.

00:52:51.000 I get that a hundred times.

00:52:52.000 And then I would say to those guys, they said they like it because it's down-to-earth and genuine.

00:52:58.000 Okay.

00:52:59.000 There's no political agenda

00:53:04.000 Well, yeah, there is actually.

00:53:06.000 That's the whole point.

00:53:07.000 There couldn't be more of a political agenda.

00:53:10.000 Jesus Christ!

00:53:12.000 Damn.

00:53:13.000 Okay, we got a letter here.

00:53:15.000 This guy says, Tarrio, who was technically the chairman of the Proud Boys after I stepped down, and then he's since relinquished that title.

00:53:28.000 He was arrested on January 5th for having a magazine as a felon, which you shouldn't have.

00:53:33.000 I don't mean... High-capacity ammunition feeding device.

00:53:38.000 Yeah.

00:53:39.000 And anyone who knows any felons like Matty O'Dell, they're real fucking careful about making sure their knife isn't more than three inches.

00:53:49.000 They don't have this.

00:53:50.000 They don't have that.

00:53:51.000 They don't go to the firing range.

00:53:53.000 They don't do this.

00:53:54.000 They're very, very careful because they know one fuck up is, I don't know, five years, how it works.

00:54:02.000 What if you got caught with a switchblade?

00:54:04.000 I'd be a felon in possession of a weapon.

00:54:06.000 It'd be either a D or C felony, depending on how they wanted to charge me.

00:54:09.000 I think you're being offered a beer there, Matty.

00:54:11.000 What do you think you would get?

00:54:12.000 Yeah, I'd like one.

00:54:13.000 I'd be probably charged as an armed career criminal.

00:54:15.000 So it'd be a third weapon offense.

00:54:16.000 What do you think your sentence would be?

00:54:18.000 It would start at 15 years.

00:54:20.000 No fucking way.

00:54:21.000 Yeah.

00:54:22.000 Oh yeah.

00:54:23.000 So if you got caught with a switchblade, thanks, you'd be looking at 15 years.

00:54:28.000 Well, in the state system, they can only go back 10 years and use only 10 years of my criminal history behind me.

00:54:33.000 In the feds, they go back 15.

00:54:37.000 What does that mean?

00:54:38.000 I'm talking about if you got caught today.

00:54:40.000 Today?

00:54:41.000 Well, my two other felon, like, uh, weapons possessions are over 15 years old.

00:54:50.000 2004.

00:54:50.000 Okay, you're speaking Chinese to me.

00:54:53.000 What?

00:54:53.000 You get caught with a switchblade, how long do you go to prison for?

00:54:58.000 I'd say in New York State probably three to nine years.

00:55:01.000 In the feds maybe 15.

00:55:03.000 So obviously with a sword of Damocles like that hanging over your head you're not gonna pack a magazine to go to DC during a major rally that where the last couple rallies you were fucking stabbed.

00:55:21.000 So shit's gone down October, November, December.

00:55:25.000 Major shit.

00:55:26.000 I think Tarja was either stabbed or with people who were stabbed.

00:55:30.000 Proud Boys were definitely stabbed.

00:55:31.000 October, November, December.

00:55:33.000 And the girl was stabbed.

00:55:34.000 And the girl was stabbed in December.

00:55:36.000 Beverly Beattie.

00:55:38.000 What's... I always forget her name.

00:55:39.000 Bevelyn Beattie.

00:55:40.000 Bevelyn Beattie.

00:55:41.000 She was stabbed and then in the hospital she got an infection.

00:55:43.000 She almost died.

00:55:45.000 And they were preventing black kids who were out hunting white people.

00:55:49.000 It's unfathomable that that would ever make it to any newspaper, but it's the truth.

00:55:55.000 Black thugs in DC go- Fucking shut the fuck up!

00:55:59.000 Okay!

00:56:00.000 Go white hunting, and Tario and Noble Beard, who since turned into a snitch, and Bevelyn Beattie prevented some old white dude from getting murdered for fun.

00:56:11.000 Everything they accuse cops of doing actually happens with fatherless youths, we'll call them.

00:56:18.000 You know what I call them?

00:56:21.000 What?

00:56:22.000 Eye mouth?

00:56:23.000 I'm not even gonna go there.

00:56:25.000 It's okay.

00:56:27.000 You're blacker than them.

00:56:30.000 So that's all very suspicious.

00:56:31.000 I'm not a fan of Tarjo.

00:56:34.000 Obviously.

00:56:35.000 But we just got a letter here it says Tarjo blames Trump for January 6th.

00:56:40.000 That's the way to go that I've been seeing which is like I think that's working for them.

00:56:45.000 I'm not saying that I like that, but that's what they want.

00:56:48.000 They want everybody to turn on Trump to be like, OK, they were deceived so they can get their Trump.

00:56:53.000 Well, I got to say, as a potential pussy, if I hadn't seen my kids in two years and I've been rotting in D.C.

00:56:59.000 jails, which are some of the shittiest jails in the country, it's pretty tempting, especially because Trump's not going to go to jail.

00:57:06.000 Yeah.

00:57:07.000 The sad truth is he didn't stand up for the guys as much as he ought to have or could have.

00:57:11.000 So do you promise to hate Trump?

00:57:14.000 Yeah?

00:57:15.000 No.

00:57:15.000 You could still love him in your heart.

00:57:16.000 Yeah, but he wasn't even in the district.

00:57:19.000 I know, but he's facing charges.

00:57:21.000 They're acting like he was a planner.

00:57:23.000 Well, it's a conspiracy.

00:57:25.000 I want to know.

00:57:26.000 Because they had that videotaped of him with the Oath Keepers.

00:57:30.000 It's so naive, too, of these journalists to go, well, the head of the Proud Boys is blaming Trump.

00:57:35.000 Yeah, he has a fucking gun to his head.

00:57:38.000 Proud Boys leader Enrique Tarrio's lawyer blames Trump for January 6th, says the ex-president unleashed this mob on the Capitol.

00:57:46.000 Well, the other problem with that, too, is I'm sitting here saying I could almost understand if you they say, like, you'll see your family again, but he's also

00:57:57.000 Affecting the sentences of the other guys.

00:58:00.000 Ethan Nordean, Joe Biggs, Zach Reel.

00:58:05.000 So this is not happening in a vacuum.

00:58:08.000 Trump told these people that the election was stolen.

00:58:12.000 He implied that, and it was stolen.

00:58:15.000 Trump told them to go there on January 6th, yeah, to legally protest.

00:58:19.000 Attorney Sabino Jarigui told jurors in Federal District Court in Washington, D.C.

00:58:24.000 during his opening statement, and it was Trump, with his speech on January 6th, that unleashed this mob on the Capitol!

00:58:31.000 The Justice Department has charged Terry with seditious conspiracy, alleging that under his leadership, members of the Proud Boys stormed the Capitol on January 6th to stop Congress from certifying then-president-elect Joe Biden's victory.

00:58:45.000 Terry was on trial along with four other Proud Boys members, Ethan Nordin, Joseph Biggs, Zachary Real, and Dominic Pozzola, each of whom included not guilty.

00:58:57.000 Okay, that's a fun story.

00:59:00.000 Alright, I want to ask this state police.

00:59:06.000 What do you think in Great Britain where the police don't carry a gun?

00:59:12.000 I think the police should carry balloons.

00:59:14.000 No, first let's hear from the cop over here.

00:59:17.000 Should carry what?

00:59:17.000 Balloons?

00:59:18.000 Balloons!

00:59:19.000 Dude, Neil, you take a balloon when someone is acting crazy and you ram them in the face, it disorients them.

00:59:26.000 Where do you get a balloon from?

00:59:28.000 The state has.

00:59:30.000 State certified balloons.

00:59:32.000 There's state trooper balloons, there's NYPD balloons.

00:59:36.000 You have like a huge Santa bag in the back seat of them, and you come out and you go, I want this to go smoothly, I want you to comply, but if you don't... And what's in the balloon?

00:59:49.000 Air.

00:59:51.000 Air?

00:59:51.000 I know that.

00:59:52.000 Helium.

00:59:54.000 Helium.

00:59:55.000 Helium.

00:59:56.000 Helium.

00:59:57.000 Helium?

00:59:58.000 Named after the Greek god Helios.

00:59:59.000 Helium, you're talking.

01:00:02.000 What do you want them to have, Sylvia?

01:00:03.000 No guns?

01:00:04.000 Like Britain?

01:00:07.000 Where perps just randomly beat up cops on a regular... I don't know what the fuck about Great Britain.

01:00:11.000 You know what perps do in Britain to cops?

01:00:13.000 They walk away.

01:00:14.000 They shove them.

01:00:16.000 They just say no.

01:00:17.000 I couldn't care less about Great Britain.

01:00:19.000 We settled that 240 some years ago.

01:00:22.000 Fuck them.

01:00:23.000 Yeah, but we have more crime here.

01:00:25.000 Ah, fuck that.

01:00:28.000 Do you want cops to have no guns?

01:00:30.000 I think they need guns in this country, definitely.

01:00:33.000 Oh, okay.

01:00:34.000 I didn't understand your question then.

01:00:36.000 I think parents of children, when the children are disturbed,

01:00:46.000 The parents should not have any type of weapons in their home.

01:00:51.000 Okay?

01:00:52.000 It isn't just a six-year-old.

01:00:55.000 There's been other children.

01:00:58.000 There was one case... Adam Lance is a good example of that.

01:01:06.000 She had a son, okay, I think in his late teens or early twenties.

01:01:12.000 She could never hug him, he didn't like to be touched affectionately.

01:01:16.000 It was just a mother there, no father, no father figure.

01:01:22.000 And she took him hunting so they'd bond.

01:01:27.000 And he went ahead and killed behind it.

01:01:29.000 How do you align those?

01:01:31.000 But how do you legislate that?

01:01:33.000 Who is that?

01:01:33.000 Yeah, which one was that?

01:01:34.000 Those are anomalies.

01:01:35.000 Was that Lanza?

01:01:35.000 Did Lanza go hunting?

01:01:38.000 Like Lanza would take his furniture out of his room and he'd just have a carpet for a day and then he would put his furniture back in his room and she gave him access to guns.

01:01:50.000 That's obviously, as a parent, you go, well, you're a retarded bitch, you should have known something was going on.

01:01:55.000 But, as a legislator, what do I say?

01:01:58.000 If your son is acting weird, you can't have guns.

01:02:02.000 How do I define weird?

01:02:03.000 Well, you gotta... You know if this... if your son isn't right.

01:02:08.000 I know.

01:02:08.000 But I'm talking about the love.

01:02:09.000 You know what all these fucking kids that went on these mass shootings have in common?

01:02:13.000 They're all fucked up on all these psychotropic drugs.

01:02:16.000 Exactly.

01:02:16.000 Yeah.

01:02:17.000 Some of them, not all of them.

01:02:18.000 They all are.

01:02:19.000 The Colorado shooter, Adelaide... Dude, the fucking mug shots, they're all like this.

01:02:23.000 They're all fucking zombies.

01:02:25.000 What do you think about the one in Idaho?

01:02:29.000 That fucking... That guy too, I'd love to know what he's on.

01:02:32.000 No, he's on craziness.

01:02:34.000 You can see it in his eyes.

01:02:35.000 That's what I'm saying.

01:02:36.000 He's on something.

01:02:38.000 He's criminally insane.

01:02:42.000 He's not on any drugs.

01:02:43.000 She gave her professional opinion.

01:02:45.000 Yes, she did.

01:02:46.000 Thank you, George.

01:02:49.000 Let's start taking calls.

01:02:50.000 We have any calls and let's put the super chat up.

01:02:52.000 All right so far We have no new ones here, but maybe I should walk everybody through the process So you go to the desktop site, and you see this banner here watch live and then right below Oh No

01:03:07.000 Oh, I have to call our tech guy and have him put the button back.

01:03:11.000 Maybe that's why there's no new ones.

01:03:13.000 Interesting.

01:03:13.000 There is no new ones, you're correct.

01:03:15.000 So we'll get that figured out and we'll let you know when it does get fixed.

01:03:17.000 I think we have risks too of like raising money for Proud Boys.

01:03:21.000 There's all kinds of IRS problems that we're facing so maybe they shut it down.

01:03:26.000 I'm just getting a message Lisa Marie Presley died.

01:03:29.000 Did she die?

01:03:30.000 I thought she... oh wow.

01:03:31.000 Last I heard she went to the hospital.

01:03:33.000 She died of a heart attack at 54.

01:03:34.000 Holy shit.

01:03:36.000 Hey people my age, don't do coke.

01:03:39.000 Sorry, that ship has sailed.

01:03:43.000 I always thought it would be... I always thought it would be to be...

01:03:49.000 Fuck you, Bill.

01:03:50.000 I always thought it would be to be with her.

01:03:53.000 Since whenever you'd fuck her... So, I guess you're trying to say I always thought it'd be cool to be with her?

01:03:59.000 Since whenever you'd fuck her, it's just like you're fucking Elvis himself.

01:04:02.000 Yeah, I'd love to fuck Elvis.

01:04:05.000 That's what I think when I see Elvis Presley.

01:04:07.000 That's my first thought.

01:04:09.000 You must be great in bed, Elvis Presley.

01:04:14.000 Uh, no girl should ever look too much like her dad.

01:04:17.000 This was the best one I could find of her.

01:04:19.000 And based on this, at her hottest, I'd rate her three at most.

01:04:21.000 What about you?

01:04:23.000 She was super hot.

01:04:23.000 That's my type.

01:04:24.000 They say that, uh, Elvis was, uh, one of these Appalachian fucking Indian dudes.

01:04:32.000 Where they're like, they were, they were like Native Americans who had blonde hair and blue eyes.

01:04:38.000 It's some weird race.

01:04:40.000 He had black hair.

01:04:42.000 That's bullshit.

01:04:43.000 You've been drinking too much Budweiser, Gavin.

01:04:55.000 That's not possible.

01:04:56.000 It's literally not possible.

01:04:58.000 We call him he who is all shook up.

01:05:00.000 It would take 24 hours to drink.

01:05:02.000 It would take 24 hours to drink 24 beers.

01:05:07.000 He who wants not you to step on his blue suede shoes.

01:05:15.000 I'm still thinking of more, but I guess that'll just stop.

01:05:17.000 Well, thanks for the update.

01:05:18.000 We have somebody on the line.

01:05:20.000 54, huh?

01:05:21.000 If they can hear our black ass or not.

01:05:27.000 Let's see.

01:05:27.000 You are on the line and your number is 914.

01:05:30.000 914, you're on the line!

01:05:35.000 What's going on, everybody?

01:05:37.000 Hey.

01:05:37.000 Hey, man.

01:05:38.000 You could have a question for Felon Matty, Troopers Tim and Neil, or Ex-Model Sylvia.

01:05:49.000 Or me.

01:05:50.000 Or Loser Piece of Shit Ryan, or Greatest of All Time Gavin.

01:05:54.000 Or Printy.

01:05:56.000 Or Printy, actually.

01:05:58.000 Printy who talks out of his eye holes.

01:06:00.000 Don't judge.

01:06:03.000 Well, my question is kind of for Ryan.

01:06:05.000 Ryan, do you have the technology to put Tommy Lee Jones on everyone's face and do a Joker face?

01:06:11.000 Is that possible?

01:06:12.000 Oh, to do a Joker face as Tommy Lee Jones?

01:06:16.000 Yeah, to have everybody do it.

01:06:17.000 Gavin, you, Matty, the whole studio.

01:06:19.000 But with the Tommy Lee Jones face?

01:06:21.000 So six of us have to become Tommy Lee Jones and then do an Indian Joker face?

01:06:26.000 Yeah, I might have to practice that.

01:06:28.000 Would you also like us to juggle tangerines with our dicks?

01:06:35.000 I mean, yeah, who's gonna say no to that?

01:06:38.000 Who are you, the fucking Little Lord Fauntleroy?

01:06:40.000 You just send out commands?

01:06:43.000 Listen Slick, I'm not letting my face anybody out.

01:06:46.000 Thanks for calling.

01:06:48.000 That's a fun idea.

01:06:49.000 Hey man, could everyone on the show eat a spider?

01:06:53.000 Like not something small too, like fair sized.

01:06:56.000 African cave drilling.

01:06:57.000 Yeah, like the size of a remote.

01:07:03.000 That's a big spider, man.

01:07:04.000 The size of like a coconut sun.

01:07:07.000 Eat a daddy long everything?

01:07:08.000 Not like, or maybe you could take the venom glands out of black widows and eat those.

01:07:15.000 I don't know how it works, right?

01:07:17.000 But just see what you can do.

01:07:18.000 And then do a Joker face.

01:07:19.000 Go to the fucking Python pet store and eat some frozen mice.

01:07:23.000 Can you do that?

01:07:24.000 And yet again, the Joker face is exhausting.

01:07:26.000 We can't have Gavin fucking doing that every show.

01:07:28.000 I'm not doing the Joker face.

01:07:29.000 It takes so much energy out of it.

01:07:31.000 You have no one.

01:07:40.000 See?

01:07:42.000 Hang up on him.

01:07:43.000 I said thank you for calling.

01:07:43.000 Oh, he's gone.

01:07:44.000 But there's a new guy.

01:07:45.000 I hear giggling in the background.

01:07:46.000 206.

01:07:47.000 Don't find our show funny, sir.

01:07:48.000 How dare you.

01:07:49.000 206, we're not gonna nix.

01:07:50.000 That's good.

01:07:52.000 Go ahead, 206.

01:07:52.000 Hey, Gavin.

01:07:53.000 Uhuru.

01:07:54.000 Uhuru.

01:07:56.000 Hey, so I got a question for everyone.

01:08:00.000 So, middle-aged women that, like, leave their husbands just kind of get bored of marriage and

01:08:05.000 That's actually a really good question.

01:08:07.000 I've got a lot of theories about this.

01:08:08.000 I can't quite figure it out.

01:08:09.000 Women hit menopause.

01:08:10.000 Their libido goes down.

01:08:12.000 Our libido, by the way,

01:08:30.000 It's fucking beeline.

01:08:32.000 Um, I think another thing that happens with middle aged woman is their dad dies and they get 300 grand or three million dollars.

01:08:41.000 And they're like, why am I lying under this dude when I could be having lunch with my fag friends in Montana and then going to Paris?

01:08:52.000 Nice.

01:08:52.000 The kids are all in college, so they're not really worried about the family unit anymore.

01:08:58.000 Empty nester.

01:09:01.000 And then also, women get older, they get fatter, they get uglier, maybe the guy's less horny, he starts beating off the porn, maybe he's not paying attention to her.

01:09:09.000 70% of divorces are initiated by the woman, but 90% of divorces are mutual.

01:09:19.000 So I think that, that woman thing is misleading.

01:09:22.000 I think that, um, a lot of the times a woman is just like, well, you don't like me either.

01:09:28.000 So fuck you.

01:09:30.000 You just, you watch your golf.

01:09:31.000 You go to the pub with your friends.

01:09:34.000 I never see you.

01:09:34.000 So you don't like me.

01:09:35.000 I want a divorce.

01:09:37.000 So I'm not divorced.

01:09:40.000 I know a lot of divorced people, but I don't know.

01:09:42.000 Let's go through.

01:09:43.000 Sylvia has been divorced nine times.

01:09:45.000 Eight.

01:09:48.000 I'm still married to number nine.

01:09:51.000 But you can't legally see him, correct?

01:09:53.000 Correct.

01:09:55.000 Okay, that sounds pretty divorce-y.

01:09:58.000 And is it true that it's the police who said you can't see him in a sense?

01:10:02.000 I mean, you have a restraining... Correct.

01:10:04.000 Because he would treat you like a punching bag?

01:10:07.000 At times.

01:10:08.000 Not all the time.

01:10:10.000 No, not all the time.

01:10:15.000 I stayed with him a lot of years because I felt his good points outweighed his bad and I hoped he would

01:10:24.000 He would control his Latino temper but that didn't happen.

01:10:28.000 My understanding is that you're, well it's true, I've been to domestic court for a friend and it was two hours long.

01:10:37.000 The first hour was in fucking Spanish and there was no blacks, no anyone there but Spicks.

01:10:44.000 Like a Bad Bunny concert.

01:10:46.000 It was literally a Bad Bunny concert.

01:10:50.000 Okay, so by the way, are you mad at the goddamn pigs who won't let you be near your husband?

01:10:56.000 Kind of.

01:10:58.000 But he beat the shit out of you!

01:11:00.000 I still love him.

01:11:05.000 It kind of, you know, it's like, it's like that guy you were talking about earlier who killed those four Mexicans because he loaned them 250 grand and they didn't use it for coke.

01:11:15.000 Part of me as a taxpayer is like, yeah, you know what?

01:11:18.000 I don't want the state getting involved.

01:11:20.000 Like, you guys signed up for something, you bought a quarter mil, you got buried.

01:11:25.000 And then with Sylvia, I'm like, maybe you shouldn't have gone over there.

01:11:29.000 She doesn't seem to want your help.

01:11:33.000 That's all domestic cases.

01:11:34.000 Tony's good points outweigh his bad, but he's changed.

01:11:38.000 He's gotten worse, so.

01:11:40.000 He's changed.

01:11:42.000 He's gotten worse.

01:11:43.000 What are some of his good points?

01:11:47.000 Anything?

01:11:48.000 He looked to protect me against everybody and everything.

01:11:51.000 From everything but his own fists.

01:11:53.000 Yeah.

01:11:57.000 Okay.

01:11:58.000 Nobody's going to want to beat up a beaten up person.

01:12:00.000 When I got sick physically, he waited on me hand and foot.

01:12:04.000 He still went to work.

01:12:05.000 He did the laundry, the cooking, the shopping.

01:12:07.000 Hand and foot.

01:12:08.000 He was good to my grandchildren financially.

01:12:14.000 He was good to me financially.

01:12:16.000 Hey, guys lose their temper sometimes.

01:12:18.000 Okay, this is an interesting look into the female psyche.

01:12:22.000 You also told me once, Sylvia, that you ruined all your marriages because of your love of cock.

01:12:26.000 Oh.

01:12:27.000 No, where'd you get that fucked up idea?

01:12:30.000 I'm just... You!

01:12:32.000 How old are you?

01:12:32.000 79.

01:12:33.000 Are you still sexually active?

01:12:35.000 None of your motherfucking business.

01:12:37.000 I thought I'd ask!

01:12:38.000 I thought I'd tell you.

01:12:39.000 Because you're still married, so I'm just wondering how that works out.

01:12:42.000 I'm not with him because the court said he can't be near me.

01:12:46.000 He's a danger to my life, okay?

01:12:50.000 That's how it worked out.

01:12:51.000 That's how it worked out.

01:12:53.000 That's how it worked out.

01:12:54.000 Okay, that sounds like a Disney fairy tale.

01:12:58.000 But in God's eyes, I'm still married.

01:13:01.000 I don't go ahead and have sex with anybody.

01:13:04.000 Okay, you're still gonna listen, caller.

01:13:06.000 We're gonna say thanks for calling because I don't want to hear you crackling and whatever in the background.

01:13:10.000 That's stupid.

01:13:11.000 But please keep listening.

01:13:13.000 So Tim, let's go through them one by one.

01:13:14.000 What do you think?

01:13:16.000 is behind this sort of middle-aged woman divorce.

01:13:19.000 You're still married, right?

01:13:20.000 I am.

01:13:21.000 But you've had rocky times.

01:13:22.000 There's ups and downs.

01:13:24.000 I always say to people, you can have a bad year, like it doesn't have to be, it feels like it's over when you guys are going through a rough time.

01:13:32.000 And then you look back on it months later and you go, wow, that was, I don't even know those two.

01:13:37.000 Okay.

01:13:40.000 You look like A.I.

01:13:40.000 me.

01:13:43.000 Yeah, for real.

01:13:44.000 I've been taking your advice so lately with, like, finding something to do that you're both interested in.

01:13:51.000 Because we're not really interested.

01:13:53.000 Our kids are gone.

01:13:56.000 Well, they're in college, so we're together.

01:15:58.000 No peepee here.

01:16:01.000 Check, check, one, two.

01:16:03.000 Okay, we got, we're back.

01:16:06.000 I think we're back now.

01:16:08.000 So, I see no audio on this.

01:16:10.000 Wait, wait, just give it a second.

01:16:11.000 Just give it a second, give it a second.

01:16:12.000 And I see me checking my phone, but with no audio.

01:16:16.000 Give it a second.

01:16:16.000 Neil's brother says no audio.

01:16:18.000 Yeah, no audio.

01:16:19.000 Check, check, one, two.

01:16:20.000 Brian from Kansas says no audio.

01:16:22.000 Yeah, I'm watching it right now.

01:16:23.000 Check, check, one, two.

01:16:24.000 It should be back.

01:16:26.000 We're back.

01:16:30.000 Okay.

01:16:31.000 Brian from Kansas, do we have audio?

01:16:35.000 Sorry about that.

01:16:36.000 I take full responsibility.

01:16:38.000 What did you do wrong?

01:16:40.000 I turned off the audio?

01:16:41.000 Yeah, I added my phone as a video source so I could do that Trump face, but I did it under the wrong channel which apparently has to sync to our audio or something, I don't know.

01:16:51.000 So I'll just use a different channel.

01:16:55.000 All right, let's go through the the motions here.

01:16:57.000 So we got Tim.

01:16:59.000 Tim says, yes, there are rocky times.

01:17:01.000 You got to do shit.

01:17:02.000 I've been trying to push this.

01:17:04.000 Let's have a date night.

01:17:05.000 She doesn't want to do once a week.

01:17:06.000 OK, once every two weeks.

01:17:09.000 And I told you how this came out.

01:17:10.000 I go, the fucking Rob and his wife, they go out every Saturday night.

01:17:15.000 And she goes, yeah.

01:17:17.000 I go, well, we should do that.

01:17:18.000 Why don't we do that?

01:17:19.000 And she goes, because I'm a lazy bitch.

01:17:24.000 It's like, again, touche, Blobs.

01:17:28.000 Like, I don't know how to win that argument.

01:17:30.000 Well, stop being a lazy bitch.

01:17:32.000 What about you, Neil?

01:17:33.000 Are you still married?

01:17:34.000 I am.

01:17:36.000 How long?

01:17:38.000 17 years.

01:17:39.000 Oh that's pretty good.

01:17:40.000 I had a practice wife though.

01:17:41.000 So this is your second marriage?

01:17:42.000 Correct.

01:17:43.000 So how did the first marriage fall apart?

01:17:45.000 I was married in the army when I was in the military.

01:17:47.000 That doesn't count.

01:17:48.000 I hear there's a lot of cheating going on with the wives.

01:17:48.000 Yeah.

01:17:52.000 I did experience that.

01:17:53.000 It was four years.

01:17:54.000 They kind of

01:17:57.000 Normalize it like, you know, it's the thing to do you get more money and all that shit So you're young and stupid and you just what you get more money if you cheat.

01:18:04.000 No, you're if you're married in the military Oh, so you marry someone like quickly without thinking.

01:18:09.000 Yeah You're young and stupid and whatever.

01:18:12.000 So what's the secret to your new marriage?

01:18:13.000 How have you preserved that?

01:18:14.000 Oh

01:18:16.000 It's all good, man.

01:18:16.000 Like I said, I had a practice wife.

01:18:17.000 It's all good.

01:18:17.000 We get along great.

01:18:18.000 Why is it a secret?

01:18:18.000 Wife's awesome.

01:18:19.000 It's wife's awesome.

01:18:20.000 It's wife's awesome.

01:18:21.000 It's wife's awesome.

01:18:22.000 It's wife's awesome.

01:18:23.000 It's wife's awesome.

01:18:24.000 It's wife's awesome.

01:18:25.000 It's wife's awesome.

01:18:26.000 It's wife's awesome.

01:18:27.000 It's wife's awesome.

01:18:28.000 It's wife's awesome.

01:18:29.000 It's wife's awesome.

01:18:30.000 It's wife's awesome.

01:18:31.000 It's wife's awesome.

01:18:32.000 It's wife's awesome.

01:18:33.000 It's wife's awesome.

01:18:34.000 It's wife's awesome.

01:18:35.000 It's wife's awesome.

01:18:36.000 It's wife's awesome.

01:18:38.000 I would fight with my wife all the time.

01:18:39.000 We do lunch dates, and I would say to her, where do you want to eat?

01:18:43.000 She doesn't want to pick it.

01:18:44.000 They never know.

01:18:45.000 I learned that later.

01:18:46.000 No, here's the secret.

01:18:47.000 You say, hey babe, guess where we're going to eat?

01:18:49.000 And she says, Cosmos.

01:18:50.000 And you're like, absolutely, we're going to Cosmos.

01:18:53.000 Or whatever.

01:18:54.000 You do better than Cosmos, right?

01:18:55.000 Yeah, exactly, wherever she guesses.

01:18:57.000 Yeah.

01:18:58.000 They want to be told.

01:19:00.000 But you're contradicting each other.

01:19:02.000 Neil's saying they want to pick the place and when they pick it, say yes.

01:19:06.000 And you're saying pick the place, they don't want to pick it.

01:19:08.000 No, but they think you picked it.

01:19:11.000 You get it?

01:19:11.000 In his scenario.

01:19:13.000 Hey babe, guess where we're going to lunch today.

01:19:15.000 She just happened to guess correctly.

01:19:17.000 But you're really going to where she wants to go.

01:19:19.000 Wherever she wants to go.

01:19:20.000 Yep, that's right.

01:19:20.000 That's where we're going.

01:19:21.000 But I'm saying it works either way.

01:19:23.000 You can just tell her we're going to go here.

01:19:26.000 And they're happy.

01:19:26.000 They don't want to think about it.

01:19:28.000 Cosmos has a pizza oven.

01:19:29.000 They want the man to be the man.

01:19:31.000 What'd he say?

01:19:32.000 Have you seen Cosmos?

01:19:32.000 They got a pizza oven.

01:19:33.000 Have you seen it?

01:19:34.000 Yes.

01:19:35.000 They give it to you hot and fresh.

01:19:37.000 The owner of Cosmos, Gabrizzi, was murdered.

01:19:39.000 Really?

01:19:40.000 Oh my god.

01:19:41.000 We locked up the perp on that one.

01:19:43.000 Wow.

01:19:43.000 Yep, I responded to that too.

01:19:45.000 You caught the guy who killed the owner of Cosmos?

01:19:47.000 That's fucked.

01:19:47.000 Who killed the owner of Cosmos.

01:19:49.000 Holy shit.

01:19:50.000 DeBrizzi.

01:19:51.000 Dennis Sweeney was his name.

01:19:53.000 Cosmo DeBrizzi was the owner of Cosmos.

01:19:56.000 Wow.

01:19:58.000 I don't know what Cosmos is.

01:20:00.000 It's an Italian restaurant chain.

01:20:01.000 There's four or five of them up in Orange County.

01:20:03.000 Delicious.

01:20:05.000 What?

01:20:05.000 Oh, it's delicious.

01:20:06.000 It is.

01:20:07.000 It's like good Olive Garden, right?

01:20:09.000 We love the Olive Garden, but frankly, this one's like a little better.

01:20:14.000 Why are you laughing?

01:20:15.000 You didn't think I could get Donald Trump on the show?

01:20:20.000 He gets on the show all the time.

01:20:21.000 I come here all the time.

01:20:22.000 He's a huge fan.

01:20:23.000 I'm a huge fan.

01:20:24.000 Never seen the stash.

01:20:27.000 He's working that in.

01:20:28.000 Well, he's not president anymore, so he doesn't have to shave every single day.

01:20:33.000 And he is part Mexican.

01:20:35.000 It's Mike Gomez Adams, right?

01:20:37.000 No one knows that.

01:20:38.000 Okay, so Neil's advice is comply.

01:20:42.000 No, I wouldn't say comply.

01:20:44.000 Well, I don't fight with my wife anymore, unless it's a doozy.

01:20:48.000 And even then, it's like, it takes a lot.

01:20:53.000 Because little shit, you're just like, I'm just going to take this on the chin.

01:20:58.000 How long you been married?

01:21:00.000 I've known her for 23 years but we've been married for like 15.

01:21:05.000 So you gotta figure it out.

01:21:10.000 Yeah.

01:21:10.000 Don't argue.

01:21:12.000 Now, if your wife's a fucking drunk, or she's like forgetting to pick up the kids, like there's obviously when women are fucking falling off the rails, you gotta be like, psh psh psh psh, get your shit together.

01:21:25.000 Sure.

01:21:26.000 But as far as like silly mistakes, like reversing while the garage door was still closed, like why, why make that a fight?

01:21:33.000 It's not a pattern.

01:21:34.000 I know.

01:21:35.000 It's not worth it.

01:21:36.000 Alright, now let's get to Matty.

01:21:38.000 Matty Odell.

01:21:38.000 I was married once.

01:21:40.000 What happened to your marriage?

01:21:41.000 Well, we grew apart.

01:21:42.000 I got married, I was... What was I?

01:21:44.000 22?

01:21:47.000 She was 19.

01:21:48.000 I was married from 94 to 2001.

01:21:55.000 How old was your boy at the time?

01:21:57.000 No, he was born after.

01:22:00.000 He was born in 95.

01:22:00.000 Right, right.

01:22:02.000 How old was your boy when you got divorced?

01:22:03.000 Oh, 2001, he was 6.

01:22:06.000 So what was the catalyst?

01:22:08.000 Were you bikering too much?

01:22:09.000 Like in Chuck Zito's book, what's it called?

01:22:13.000 Street Rules or something?

01:22:15.000 He goes, I spent too much time with the Hells Angels.

01:22:17.000 I didn't spend enough time with my family and I let my family fall apart.

01:22:24.000 I didn't do that until around 2000.

01:22:27.000 I was separated a couple of years before my divorce was final.

01:22:31.000 So we weren't living together.

01:22:33.000 Okay.

01:22:34.000 Were you a Hells Angel then?

01:22:35.000 No, no, no.

01:22:36.000 Oh, shit.

01:22:37.000 That happened after.

01:22:38.000 Yeah.

01:22:40.000 So when did you join the Hells Angels?

01:22:41.000 At what age?

01:22:42.000 I started hanging around with them in 2000.

01:22:44.000 How old were you?

01:22:48.000 In 2000?

01:22:48.000 23 years from 50, so 27.

01:22:51.000 And you got divorced, separated at what age?

01:22:55.000 I was probably married four years and then I was separated three.

01:23:00.000 Took three years to get divorced.

01:23:01.000 Dude, this is a thing black people do.

01:23:04.000 You ask a question and you never get the fucking correct answer.

01:23:07.000 Okay, I was married, I was, we were together.

01:23:09.000 What age did you start getting involved with the Hells Angels?

01:23:12.000 I told you, 27.

01:23:14.000 And what age did you get separated from your wife? 24.

01:23:22.000 Or 25.

01:23:23.000 Oh shit.

01:23:25.000 So it was the Hells Angels was not a cause.

01:23:28.000 No.

01:23:29.000 Were you getting up to some dangerous shenanigans?

01:23:31.000 Any crimes?

01:23:32.000 I've been a criminal my entire life.

01:23:36.000 My criminal history goes back as an adult back to 1988.

01:23:38.000 At least he's honest.

01:23:41.000 Was that a factor?

01:23:42.000 Well, you know, she knew who she married.

01:23:46.000 Right, so she liked the bad boy.

01:23:48.000 I guess.

01:23:50.000 Okay, so it sounds to me like crime has nothing to do with this.

01:23:55.000 No.

01:23:56.000 Absolutely nothing.

01:23:59.000 She wasn't, she wasn't happy when the cops would come knock on the door and be like, he's mad here.

01:24:02.000 You know, that didn't go over well.

01:24:05.000 Right.

01:24:05.000 Fart in church, but you know, what are you gonna do?

01:24:09.000 But, no, we just, I mean, you know, she was fucking 19 years old when we got married.

01:24:14.000 She got, she had my kid, I think she just turned 21.

01:24:18.000 I know, but I've heard people say that's actually good, because when you get married young, you grow together.

01:24:23.000 She's a die-hard lefty now.

01:24:24.000 So you're like, now we're playing paddleboard, now we're watching The Sopranos, now we like fucking burritos on Thursdays.

01:24:30.000 I mean, we get along great now.

01:24:31.000 Quiz night at this, like, bar.

01:24:33.000 Right.

01:24:35.000 The reason we,

01:24:37.000 I would say what it was is we were too much A-type personalities.

01:24:44.000 Oh yeah, I've heard you say that before.

01:24:46.000 She wouldn't just let things lie because she was... She was an alpha female.

01:24:52.000 Yeah, and she would be like... She would challenge and not back down.

01:25:01.000 With my parents, I think that worked out in their favor.

01:25:03.000 My mom's a cunt and my dad's an asshole.

01:25:08.000 So what does that make you, Gavin?

01:25:11.000 An asshole cunt.

01:25:12.000 A genius.

01:25:13.000 A boy genius.

01:25:14.000 I guess a faggot, right?

01:25:15.000 Fags are assholes or cunts.

01:25:21.000 but they she needed he needed her to reign him in and she needed him to like abuse her not abuse her but like i don't know they're like x-men where my my mom is like the kind of woman where she touches you and then you burn because she's made of flames

01:25:39.000 My dad is like the guy with the laser eyes who kills you every time he looks at you.

01:25:44.000 So they needed each other because no one else could handle their fucking... Very hypnotic.

01:25:50.000 I'll never forget I was, I was visiting them and I, I heard, I think I heard him mumble like, why the fuck did I marry you?

01:26:00.000 And then I hear like, and I hear, why the fuck did you marry me?

01:26:05.000 Why the fuck did I marry you?

01:26:11.000 Better question!

01:26:12.000 Shit is cooking down south.

01:26:16.000 We got there on the grill.

01:26:17.000 So I came downstairs like ready to like, I don't know, deflect plates.

01:26:21.000 And then my mom was like, you fancy a cuppa?

01:26:24.000 Eh.

01:26:25.000 I was like, my mother, she used to get mad and she'd be like, I should have kept my fucking legs crossed.

01:26:32.000 Like, thanks mom!

01:26:34.000 Thanks a lot.

01:26:36.000 She once said to me, she goes, I love you, but I don't like you.

01:26:41.000 Yeah.

01:26:41.000 They don't have to like you, they just gotta love you.

01:26:45.000 We got plenty of calls.

01:26:47.000 All right, let's take some calls.

01:26:48.000 No Soup Chat, sorry.

01:26:49.000 Soup Chat is off tonight.

01:26:52.000 Let's see.

01:26:52.000 The IRS may have shut it down.

01:26:53.000 510, you're on the Lero.

01:26:54.000 Go ahead, 510.

01:26:59.000 Hey, how's it?

01:27:00.000 I have a question.

01:27:02.000 I was watching SimCast the other night, and they were talking about Andrew Tate or something, and the topic of positive male role models came up, and nobody could think of one.

01:27:15.000 Who's a content creator, I mean?

01:27:17.000 And I was looking in the chat, and nobody had any suggestions at all, and I was just wondering, you were the only one, actually, who came to mind for me.

01:27:27.000 Do you consider yourself a positive role model?

01:27:31.000 Yeah, dude, I'm the GOAT.

01:27:32.000 You might be the only one.

01:27:33.000 No, there's tons.

01:27:36.000 Really?

01:27:37.000 But I want to make something clear with Andrew Tate.

01:27:40.000 I love that he is supporting masculinity.

01:27:42.000 He's defending young men.

01:27:44.000 I have a real fucking problem with the fact that he used Ukrainian hot chicks to eviscerate, bankrupt and abuse mentally ill, lonely men.

01:27:56.000 That's not very empowering, it's highly immoral.

01:28:00.000 I have a lot of trouble getting over it.

01:28:02.000 What you do, you get a water, and you tell them that she's gonna call you back, and then they send flowers, and then you get another guy on the phone, and then he says that you're gonna be together tomorrow, but then you say it was too expensive, and you get another million dollars.

01:28:20.000 Like, that pisses me off.

01:28:21.000 I heard he's in critical condition.

01:28:24.000 Oh really?

01:28:25.000 Yeah.

01:28:27.000 I heard about him getting arrested twice or some shit.

01:28:31.000 Let's look that up.

01:28:32.000 He's in jail.

01:28:34.000 That's a very shitty thing about a guy and it's hard to reconcile but outside of that I think he's a huge asset to Western civilization and the fact that he's defending men.

01:28:45.000 Paul Joseph Watson had a big, a great video recently about what an asset Andrew Tate is and how no one else is defending these young men and these kids, young men are

01:28:58.000 Relentlessly getting abused in school.

01:29:01.000 And when I say abused, I mean telling they suck.

01:29:04.000 Paul Joseph Watson had a video where it was in Britain, it was in London, and they went, what are women good for?

01:29:11.000 And they were like, everything, they rock, they're amazing.

01:29:14.000 And then they did, what are men good for?

01:29:16.000 No one had anything positive to say.

01:29:19.000 Nothing was the most common response.

01:29:21.000 But even men, like white men were like,

01:29:25.000 It was like the most controversial thing you could say.

01:29:27.000 It was like they had said, does white power ever have a justification?

01:29:33.000 Which would be a much more controversial and interesting thing to say.

01:29:36.000 But they couldn't answer.

01:29:37.000 So Andrew Tate represents

01:29:42.000 An opposition to that.

01:29:43.000 But the fucking taking advantage of incels, it pisses me off.

01:29:47.000 But as far as positive male role models, Dana White, Joe Rogan, Ben Shapiro, Michael Knowles, Dan Bongino.

01:30:00.000 I mean, it goes on and on and on.

01:30:03.000 Jordan Peterson.

01:30:06.000 Jesse Lee Peterson.

01:30:07.000 Tommy Jones.

01:30:08.000 Milo Yiannopoulos.

01:30:10.000 I don't know about Tommy Lee Jones.

01:30:12.000 Maybe.

01:30:12.000 Oh, I am a role model.

01:30:16.000 Yeah, that's fair.

01:30:17.000 I just thought that all of these guys have sort of skeletons in their closet, some of them, or their families are dysfunctional or something like that.

01:30:27.000 Or, you know, there's something in their past that discounts them.

01:30:29.000 People get divorced.

01:30:30.000 Donald Trump is on, what, his third marriage or something?

01:30:33.000 But he's a good dad.

01:30:36.000 I mean shit gets fucked up.

01:30:38.000 People get divorced.

01:30:39.000 That doesn't mean they're not good role models for men.

01:30:41.000 A good role model for a man represents masculinity.

01:30:45.000 Masculinity is worrying about your kids, standing by your kids, having mobility and grit and honor.

01:30:55.000 The biggest thing about being a man is being a handshake guy.

01:30:59.000 And having hills to die on.

01:31:03.000 What those hills are, are open to debate, but like, you gotta rat on Matty and send him to jail, even though he didn't do anything wrong.

01:31:16.000 That's a hill to die on, you should go to jail for five years to avoid that.

01:31:19.000 Like Nick Oaks, Nick Oaks, sorry.

01:31:22.000 Nick Oaks could shit on the Proud Boys and say they were planning January 6th, he could lie,

01:31:29.000 And he wouldn't do any jail time.

01:31:31.000 He just got four years and he's a real man.

01:31:35.000 Because they didn't have a plan for January 6th and the way he put it to us was I could have lied and said Proud Boys had a plan and I wouldn't have done any jail time and I could have got money too.

01:31:46.000 Like I think Noble Beard got 50 grand.

01:31:48.000 That's a rumor I heard.

01:31:50.000 And he said, but then I would be, for the rest of my life, I'd be walking around feeling like a piece of shit.

01:31:57.000 If doing something immoral like that makes you feel like a piece of shit, you're a real man.

01:32:02.000 And I think there's plenty of those guys around.

01:32:05.000 Plenty of them.

01:32:06.000 We showcase them on this show.

01:32:10.000 Thanks for calling.

01:32:14.000 We got to hang up on these guys earlier.

01:32:16.000 They're still listening.

01:32:17.000 I just, we don't need to hear like, huh, huh.

01:32:20.000 608.

01:32:21.000 Turn with the frog.

01:32:23.000 You're on the late.

01:32:23.000 608.

01:32:27.000 Is there a fight going on?

01:32:27.000 Oh God.

01:32:30.000 Wouldn't it be great if a caller forgot they were on hold and we heard a fight?

01:32:43.000 That would be cool.

01:32:45.000 I was listening to your show with Ant yesterday, and that graph that you showed about the weight increase.

01:32:52.000 Yeah?

01:32:53.000 I could be wrong, but wasn't high fructose corn syrup introduced to the market in 1970, and there was a huge weight increase from that?

01:33:01.000 Wait, one more time.

01:33:02.000 Wasn't what introduced in 1970?

01:33:04.000 High fructose corn syrup.

01:33:06.000 High fructose corn syrup.

01:33:07.000 Oh yeah, didn't you call into the show to make this point yesterday?

01:33:12.000 I think I did, but I didn't get through.

01:33:15.000 I misremembered.

01:33:16.000 I saw you on the waiting board.

01:33:18.000 I misremembered.

01:33:18.000 I couldn't remember.

01:33:19.000 Interesting.

01:33:20.000 Alright, that's all I got.

01:33:23.000 Alright, thanks for calling.

01:33:24.000 Yeah, it might be high fructose corn syrup.

01:33:27.000 And then TV dinners and women starting to work.

01:33:29.000 That was around the same time, right?

01:33:32.000 But like shitty food, you know, it's been available for a long time.

01:33:36.000 Not generationally like that.

01:33:40.000 We indulged in it in the 80s.

01:33:43.000 Yeah, Hungry Man TV dinners.

01:33:46.000 Maybe it was Tucker Carlson's wife there, the fucking Swansons.

01:33:50.000 Yeah, well here's the thing is, in a supermarket you shop that whole outside, the perimeter.

01:33:55.000 Don't go in the aisles, that's all processed crap.

01:33:57.000 That's where all the seed oils are and all that stuff.

01:33:59.000 All the real food, all the...

01:34:01.000 Real food, produce, meats, dairy are all in every supermarket.

01:34:07.000 All the outside ring of the supermarket.

01:34:10.000 Anything in the aisles, no good.

01:34:12.000 I stay to the outside perimeter.

01:34:12.000 He's right.

01:34:14.000 It's the shape of an O because after you're done, you say, Oh God, that was a good decision.

01:34:23.000 Next call.

01:34:23.000 We got 419 on the line.

01:34:24.000 419.

01:34:24.000 Giddy up 419.

01:34:25.000 Hi girl.

01:34:32.000 Hey, what's up?

01:34:35.000 What's going on?

01:34:35.000 Not much.

01:34:36.000 We're doing a live show in the Bronx.

01:34:39.000 That's fantastic.

01:34:41.000 That's why I'm calling.

01:34:43.000 So I called a couple months back and I had spoken with you.

01:34:45.000 I'd asked a question about Trump.

01:34:47.000 It's totally unrelated.

01:34:48.000 But at the end of that call, you had asked if, you know, if I was married, if I had any kids.

01:34:54.000 And, you know, I really got my husband and I thinking, and long story short,

01:35:00.000 I took a pregnancy test today and it turns out I'm pregnant!

01:35:05.000 Congratulations!

01:35:08.000 Wow!

01:35:09.000 Way to go!

01:35:11.000 You go girl!

01:35:12.000 How the fuck did that happen?

01:35:13.000 My husband is very excited and my question for you guys is how long do you recommend waiting before we start telling people?

01:35:22.000 I've never had pregnancies or kids or anything like that before so it's totally new to us

01:35:29.000 And our first instinct is to like, you know get super excited to tell everybody but I understand that that's not necessarily Yeah, you gotta wait for the retard test

01:35:40.000 I think it's like a month or two.

01:35:41.000 You're probably pro-life if you watch this show, but they measure the width of the spinal cord and if it's too wide they go, this is probably going to be retarded.

01:36:01.000 I don't know how accurate it is I've heard people ignore that test and do just fine but a lot of people abort the baby when they know it's going to be a tard and then there's also cranial dysplasia and all kinds of other major problems but you gotta I think the doula and the yeah that's not gonna happen yeah dude you're making you're scaring her now I'm sorry shit I didn't even think of that

01:36:25.000 Let me reintroduce this.

01:36:28.000 There's like a one in a billion chance there's a problem in the first trimester.

01:36:33.000 You're good.

01:36:33.000 How old are you?

01:36:34.000 I'm 31.

01:36:36.000 Yeah, you're good, you're good.

01:36:38.000 But you have to allow for the one in a million chance that there's going to be an issue, because then you have to call everyone up and be like, yeah, that's not going as planned.

01:36:49.000 Start popping some balloons, right?

01:36:51.000 Even if there was something wrong, we would still want to keep it.

01:36:57.000 We're Christian and we're really polite.

01:37:00.000 Okay, but then there's other, and this I feel bad, now Tim is making me self-conscious, but there are like one in a billion things where you're not keeping it.

01:37:11.000 Like the thing where they have no brain and that kind of stuff.

01:37:14.000 That won't happen.

01:37:15.000 Or if it's a Democrat.

01:37:20.000 Without saying all that, it could be like seven, I think it's seven weeks.

01:37:24.000 You've got to go at that point.

01:37:26.000 Seven weeks.

01:37:27.000 Okay.

01:37:28.000 Seven weeks.

01:37:30.000 Wait seven weeks, because pregnancy is 40 weeks.

01:37:33.000 Right.

01:37:34.000 Yeah, the seven weeks rule, right?

01:37:38.000 There's like a rule.

01:37:39.000 The custom, at least up here in New York, and I'm sure in a lot of parts of the country, is when you're pregnant, you go up to your friends who are childless or unmarried, and you go,

01:37:49.000 I'm pregnant, bitch!

01:37:53.000 Did I just crack your dog up?

01:37:58.000 We do dog humor on the show.

01:38:02.000 Your dog's funny, man.

01:38:03.000 That's advanced.

01:38:05.000 Yeah, I'm sorry to even bring that up.

01:38:07.000 That's stupid.

01:38:08.000 That's like, I won the lottery and I'm like,

01:38:19.000 Well, you have to pay a lot of tax.

01:38:21.000 It's actually kind of a bummer.

01:38:22.000 I'm sorry to bring up the negative, but you, you kind of asked me.

01:38:26.000 So yeah, there is this, there's a horrific worst case scenario.

01:38:30.000 And I forgot what the number was, but Ryan, you say seven, seven, eight weeks.

01:38:33.000 Wait.

01:38:34.000 Yeah.

01:38:34.000 Seven, eight weeks.

01:38:34.000 First trimester, right?

01:38:36.000 And then once it comes out, if it's a girl, try to keep your head up, try to stay positive.

01:38:42.000 You know, you can, you can, you'll get another kick at the can.

01:38:52.000 Yeah, I know it happened fast I met your husband I'm surprised it happened in more than 30 seconds We got when we were that that episode of I

01:39:15.000 Things are going great.

01:39:16.000 Our new show, our new advice column.

01:39:17.000 I'm doing great.

01:39:18.000 We shoot out in Nashville.

01:39:20.000 This guy's like, yeah, I'm with my wife here.

01:39:23.000 We're trying to have kids.

01:39:24.000 Like, we fuck.

01:39:26.000 It doesn't last.

01:39:27.000 I fuck her for like 10 minutes.

01:39:28.000 I'm sorry.

01:39:28.000 I kind of premature ejaculate.

01:39:31.000 I'm like, 10 minutes?

01:39:33.000 Damn.

01:39:34.000 What are you, the marathon man?

01:39:35.000 Oh.

01:39:39.000 Are you sure that her vagina's not ripped to shreds?

01:39:44.000 You didn't give her a UTI?

01:39:45.000 Ten minutes?

01:39:46.000 Don't you have places to be?

01:39:50.000 Very funny.

01:39:51.000 On a serious note, if you have any baby shower invitations, I know a guy.

01:39:56.000 Yeah, no.

01:39:59.000 What?

01:40:00.000 Printer ink is incredibly expensive.

01:40:01.000 I'm mad at you for printing this out.

01:40:06.000 Yeah, I got a little crafty.

01:40:11.000 I hate that when you see it in court and they're like, Alex Jones, is this not something you said?

01:40:16.000 And you're like, that's 90% black ink.

01:40:19.000 What the fuck are you doing?

01:40:20.000 Print out the text.

01:40:22.000 You don't need that.

01:40:23.000 And Alex Jones himself does that.

01:40:25.000 He prints out entire articles with all the color pictures.

01:40:28.000 Have you ever heard of Scottish people, dude?

01:40:30.000 What the fuck are you doing?

01:40:32.000 Why does 50% of the ink print almost 100% of all printers?

01:40:39.000 Alright, let's take another call.

01:40:43.000 Uh oh, I just got a text from someone.

01:40:45.000 That implies that we may have lost audio again.

01:40:48.000 No, I'm looking at audio now.

01:40:49.000 Not again!

01:40:55.000 No, it's gone.

01:40:56.000 You know another pet peeve of mine with courtrooms?

01:40:58.000 Fucking wires everywhere.

01:41:00.000 There's a speaker here, there's a TV, and then the wires are coming down from the TV, there's speakers going across desks.

01:41:07.000 Someone's being sentenced to life in prison here.

01:41:10.000 This is a big deal for them.

01:41:12.000 It's basically a church in reverse.

01:41:15.000 So, put the wires behind the drywall, make things fucking neat.

01:41:19.000 This is important to people.

01:41:22.000 Not them, it's just daily business.

01:41:24.000 I don't like that.

01:41:25.000 It's disrespectful to the accused.

01:41:29.000 Yeah, but you liked the judge that was in her lingerie there sentencing people, right?

01:41:33.000 I did, but that was Columbia.

01:41:36.000 How about the New York judge who shit herself?

01:41:41.000 On the bench?

01:41:41.000 You talking about Biden again?

01:41:44.000 She shit herself on the bench and then gave everyone shit because they couldn't get her a new chair in time.

01:41:53.000 Sorry, chairs are not diapers.

01:41:55.000 I can't be constantly swapping out a Huggies chair for you.

01:42:00.000 Well, I gotta go piss.

01:42:04.000 Alright, let's do 718.

01:42:05.000 718, go ahead.

01:42:06.000 Go ahead, 718.

01:42:07.000 Speak up!

01:42:09.000 Moving along.

01:42:10.000 718.

01:42:10.000 718, you son of a gun.

01:42:24.000 Who's a son of a gun?

01:42:25.000 7-1-8.

01:42:29.000 Say what?

01:42:29.000 7-1-8?

01:42:30.000 I'll put him back in the queue, and I'll take another call.

01:42:34.000 Nobody on 7-1-8?

01:42:35.000 We have, instead, 3-8-6.

01:42:36.000 3-8-6!

01:42:40.000 You're on the licks.

01:42:41.000 Uhuru!

01:42:42.000 Uhuru!

01:42:43.000 Uhuru.

01:42:44.000 What's up, Matty?

01:42:45.000 What's going on?

01:42:46.000 Gavin went to... Gavin went to take a piss, but... He's back.

01:42:52.000 I'm trying to move to Greenville, South Carolina, yeah.

01:42:53.000 Florida's where it's at?

01:42:54.000 I'm not a reptile, dude.

01:42:55.000 I cannot handle a hundred degrees for six months.

01:43:18.000 No, it's nothing like that, dude.

01:43:19.000 You got AC in your car, AC in your house, you have nothing to worry about.

01:43:22.000 Go hang out in the pool, go hang out in the water.

01:43:25.000 In the beach, you'll be fine.

01:43:27.000 We aren't really outside very much, Slick.

01:43:31.000 We are indoors.

01:43:32.000 I just realized we didn't go behind the fucking paywall and we have 15 minutes left.

01:43:35.000 Not even once.

01:43:38.000 Alright, thanks for calling Wilkinson, Florida.

01:43:40.000 We were wrapped up.

01:43:42.000 You only get one thing.

01:43:47.000 Are we going behind the paywall?

01:43:48.000 No.

01:43:49.000 Why even?

01:43:49.000 5-7-3?

01:43:49.000 5-7-3, go ahead!

01:43:49.000 Hey, how's it going everybody?

01:43:51.000 What's happening?

01:43:51.000 Pretty good.

01:43:59.000 All right.

01:43:59.000 So I was talking to some people the other day, uh, kind of a mixed group of the left and the right and everything, but we've all decided that we enjoy stereotypes because they exist for a reason.

01:44:11.000 A hundred percent.

01:44:13.000 So, so I wanted to ask everybody, what's your favorite stereotype?

01:44:18.000 Because like for me, the weirdest one is that all black people like anime and

01:44:27.000 I was like, eh, that can't be true.

01:44:30.000 These two giant construction workers walk into my house to, you know, they're going to fix something, and all of a sudden, I'm sitting there, I'm watching TV with my kid, and he's like, oh, is that the new Dragon Ball?

01:44:42.000 Man, that's awesome!

01:44:43.000 I'm like, in the middle of rural wherever I'm at, this is, it's just, it's super fucking weird.

01:44:52.000 It's a fact.

01:44:52.000 So I was just wondering, do you guys have a favorite one, and why?

01:44:56.000 Favorite stereotype?

01:44:57.000 Favorite black?

01:44:58.000 Uh, I guess Martin Luther King.

01:45:00.000 It doesn't have to be black.

01:45:01.000 No favorite stereotype.

01:45:03.000 It is true.

01:45:04.000 Thanks for calling.

01:45:05.000 They all watch anime.

01:45:07.000 They all love it.

01:45:09.000 At my gym, I heard this black dude talking about, like, I don't know, Pokemon, Bong Bong, whatever the fuck the guy is.

01:45:16.000 And he was like, he's a really good boxer.

01:45:19.000 He's my age.

01:45:20.000 And he was like, yeah, I don't know.

01:45:22.000 I think that Bonko Bang Bang is kind of over the top sometimes.

01:45:26.000 I think they overdo it, you know?

01:45:28.000 I'm like, what?

01:45:30.000 You mean like the guy who punches someone and his fists explode and everyone dies?

01:45:33.000 Like what the fuck?

01:45:34.000 That's stupider than wrestling.

01:45:36.000 But in New York City, right by Times Square, if you go down to like, I don't know, 40th Street, there's this huge comic book store.

01:45:46.000 It's two stories.

01:45:49.000 And I go in there sometimes hoping to see, I don't know, some graphic novel that Peter Bagg put out or something.

01:45:55.000 It's never there.

01:45:56.000 And it is a black library.

01:46:00.000 It's a hundred percent of the people in the comic book store are black.

01:46:05.000 Yeah.

01:46:06.000 And they're looking at things, and some of them have suits on, there's young and old, and it's a black library.

01:46:13.000 They love comic books.

01:46:16.000 Just a fact.

01:46:17.000 My favorite stereotype is the fact that Arclesians always open up Barcluthian wormholes, and it is true.

01:46:24.000 I have a very controversial racist thing to say for a change.

01:46:29.000 I personally have noticed that when I compliment black people, they start getting inflated and arrogant and not violent, but like, yeah, fuck you, bitch.

01:46:46.000 Like even with Larry once, I was like, dude, you're really good at this boxing commentary.

01:46:50.000 I mean, I could never do anything like that.

01:46:52.000 And you have a natural thing.

01:46:54.000 He's like, yeah, I could outsmart all these fuckers.

01:46:57.000 And he started getting like weirdly...

01:47:00.000 Not violent, but tough.

01:47:02.000 And you see this with rappers where they're told they rule, and they're awesome, and they start going, yeah, I'll fucking kill you, I'm so awesome.

01:47:11.000 And this is just a theory, I'm sorry, I'm not taking this to the Smithsonian, but I've noticed white people are the opposite way.

01:47:18.000 They'll deflect compliments.

01:47:19.000 When you go, you fucking rule, you're amazing, you're like, okay, okay, all right.

01:47:24.000 And they don't like it, they don't like compliments, they don't like being told they rule.

01:47:28.000 Yeah.

01:47:29.000 This is a theory.

01:47:30.000 I'm just, it's on the chalkboard.

01:47:32.000 Isn't that humility and being humble?

01:47:34.000 Oh, I just thought so.

01:47:34.000 Right.

01:47:34.000 Yeah.

01:47:35.000 You're the smartest person I've ever met.

01:47:37.000 You're a fucking genius.

01:47:38.000 Holy shit.

01:47:39.000 How do you do it?

01:47:39.000 Like, oh, it's not that hard.

01:47:41.000 You just look it up and then you do some homework and then just a thing.

01:47:45.000 I don't know.

01:47:46.000 Like the Country Music Awards is a perfect example.

01:47:46.000 Don't worry about it.

01:47:48.000 It's mostly white and they always credit the person that wrote it or like produced it.

01:47:53.000 They're like,

01:47:53.000 I gotta thank, first of all, God, second of all, Liz Schramptamer, who wrote the lyrics.

01:48:00.000 It's like you don't see that in any other word show.

01:48:01.000 I think I've seen a BET award where the guy thanked himself.

01:48:05.000 Snoop Dogg!

01:48:06.000 I gotta thank D.O.

01:48:07.000 Double Me for putting all the hard work in.

01:48:10.000 Classic Snoopy dog dog.

01:48:12.000 Yeah, they have an odd balance of insecurity and pride that they're wrestling with these black people sometimes.

01:48:19.000 I want to read these two thingamadoodles.

01:48:22.000 They're both from Chicks.

01:48:24.000 Hey, Gavin, on your show and on episode one of I'm Doing Great, you read a letter from somebody who banged 15 fours and found somebody who he likes who has BPD.

01:48:36.000 In both cases, you thought BPD was bipolar disorder.

01:48:40.000 It's not.

01:48:40.000 It's way worse.

01:48:42.000 BPD is borderline personality disorder.

01:48:44.000 Oh, you're right.

01:48:45.000 Yes, you're right.

01:48:46.000 Oops.

01:48:47.000 Fuck.

01:48:47.000 That's way worse.

01:48:48.000 Yeah.

01:48:49.000 And it is really just a collection of horrible personality traits that don't fit into any other mental disorder.

01:48:56.000 You gave the correct advice to the reader.

01:48:58.000 Leave her.

01:48:59.000 Now this is a, if you haven't seen our new show, I'm doing great.

01:49:02.000 Uh, this guy was dating a girl.

01:49:04.000 He thought she was the one, but she's nuts.

01:49:06.000 She went off her meds and tried to kill herself.

01:49:08.000 And he's like, should I keep going with this?

01:49:10.000 And we all said, uh, no.

01:49:11.000 Run for the hills.

01:49:13.000 Time to go, buddy.

01:49:15.000 You're going to have a 15 month old and a custody battle is what's going to be going on.

01:49:21.000 Um, this woman will destroy his life.

01:49:25.000 I know firsthand.

01:49:27.000 And if he goes to the BPD loved ones subreddit, Oh, I didn't know about this.

01:49:32.000 It's all one word.

01:49:33.000 BPD loved ones.

01:49:35.000 Uh, he can peer into this horribly destroyed future that he was, uh, setting up for himself.

01:49:42.000 If he doesn't leave this girl today.

01:49:44.000 Now, I got another letter that said a similar thing, but it might have been from a BPD chick.

01:49:51.000 This is again a woman.

01:49:55.000 Hey Gav, saw you at the Vegas show, blah blah blah.

01:49:57.000 Me and my husband have matching bald eagle tattoos.

01:50:01.000 Nice.

01:50:02.000 I watch your show religiously and she goes BPD is not a bipolar disorder, it's borderline personality disorder.

01:50:09.000 Or in Britain it's known as emotionally unstable personality disorder.

01:50:13.000 It just sounds like crazy to me.

01:50:16.000 Or being a liberal, same thing.

01:50:18.000 Or a narcissist.

01:50:19.000 Just stay away.

01:50:21.000 BPD is usually caused by severe childhood trauma and is marked by intense fears of abandonment, intense sudden mood swings, often referred to as emotional burn victims because of how sensitive they are, impulsivity, splitting and more.

01:50:35.000 This sounds like your ex-girlfriend, Ryan.

01:50:37.000 Whoa.

01:50:38.000 Well, uh, yeah.

01:50:39.000 That does sound like me.

01:50:41.000 But a lot of, a lot of, dude, a lot of that sounded like everything because I was like, she might be a reptilian at one point.

01:50:47.000 And I literally believed that for like two days.

01:50:50.000 I was like, I think she's a reptilian.

01:50:52.000 You can just say reptile.

01:50:54.000 No, no, no, like a reptilian race.

01:50:56.000 Okay.

01:50:57.000 People with borderline are the most likely to commit suicide out of any mental disorder, even beating major depressive disorder because of intense depression impulsivity.

01:51:08.000 There is no medication for borderline.

01:51:11.000 Mood stabilizers like lithium make it worse, and only specialized therapy, DBT, can help.

01:51:17.000 Even in the therapy mental health community, BPD is incredibly stigmatized and a lot of therapists won't even take them as clients because of how difficult they can be.

01:51:28.000 I bet the sex is amazing though.

01:51:30.000 Let's all identify the elephant in the room.

01:51:32.000 The bat shit crazy comes free with the vagina.

01:51:34.000 Wow!

01:51:36.000 They sound like candidates for lobotomies.

01:51:40.000 You've had ten beers and done two bumps?

01:51:43.000 You want some BPD.

01:51:48.000 Those with BPD can be wonderful people and mothers if they make the effort.

01:51:51.000 I will never go away.

01:51:53.000 No, it will never go away, but can be put in remission with a lot of hard work and determination.

01:51:57.000 Dr. Fox on YouTube is a psychiatrist specialized in blah blah blah.

01:52:01.000 Love you more than a friend.

01:52:03.000 And here she ends it with, P.S.

01:52:05.000 I don't care what anyone says, I think Ryan and his shitty puns are funny.

01:52:13.000 That's what I'm talking about.

01:52:15.000 That's what I think of that.

01:52:21.000 Oh come on, you shit yourself for that?

01:52:25.000 Not worth it.

01:52:26.000 That sounds like a good name for a comedy album.

01:52:29.000 I shit myself for that?

01:52:30.000 For this?

01:52:33.000 You shit yourself for that?

01:52:36.000 You gots to wash yo ass.

01:52:38.000 I didn't shit myself.

01:52:39.000 You're all that, are you?

01:52:41.000 Great song, All That.

01:52:43.000 Rest in Peace, Jeff Beck, also.

01:52:46.000 We mentioned that yesterday on the show, no need to get into it.

01:52:49.000 But I didn't get to say my piece.

01:52:52.000 I like Jeff Beck a lot.

01:52:54.000 Really?

01:52:54.000 Yes.

01:52:57.000 Okay.

01:53:00.000 Listen to this cool solo.

01:53:02.000 Was he a transgender?

01:53:04.000 No, that's Imogen Heap.

01:53:04.000 No.

01:53:06.000 She's singing her bullshit, but he's about to... Oh, this is that bass prodigy with perfect tits?

01:53:10.000 Yes.

01:53:15.000 Yeah, dude, you're such a Puerto Rican.

01:53:17.000 No one likes late Jeff Beck.

01:53:20.000 Oh, they sure do.

01:53:20.000 What do you like, late Prince, too?

01:53:22.000 Prince and the Power Generation?

01:53:25.000 Do you like the artist formerly known as Prince?

01:53:27.000 Yes, I like Prince.

01:53:28.000 You probably like late Black Sabbath.

01:53:30.000 I like a post-Aussie Black Sabbath.

01:53:33.000 Everybody watching likes late Gavin McGinnis.

01:53:38.000 Hey, no, I didn't mean that.

01:53:39.000 You have hurt me today.

01:53:41.000 I didn't mean that, though.

01:53:41.000 I was just kind of... No, no, what I meant was that it's late tonight.

01:53:47.000 What is it, 12?

01:53:48.000 No, it's only 10.

01:53:49.000 It's 9.53.

01:53:50.000 It's late for a lot of people, and that's what I meant, and I'm... Hey, we got Printy.

01:53:57.000 Remember Printy?

01:54:00.000 Hey, Gavin, cheer up.

01:54:01.000 It's me, Printy.

01:54:02.000 You need a copy of something?

01:54:04.000 A scan?

01:54:06.000 Fax?

01:54:09.000 That's the facts, Jack.

01:54:11.000 Get it?

01:54:13.000 Fenty?

01:54:15.000 Maybe a collar.

01:54:18.000 But I, that, if you ask me, I think you get better with age and time, like wine.

01:54:23.000 Like I get blurrier with time.

01:54:27.000 I can't believe you don't have your hair in your face.

01:54:30.000 Yeah, you know, cause Gavin's great advice was get the hair out of your face.

01:54:34.000 And I said, you know what?

01:54:34.000 Take yourself more seriously, get the hair out of your face and bam.

01:54:37.000 So you've helped me, you know, be taken more seriously.

01:54:41.000 It's a step in the right direction.

01:54:43.000 It's a, it's a great step.

01:54:44.000 So, and you know, the callers love you too.

01:54:49.000 I mean, now catatonic, some people even say, I love you more than a friend.

01:54:53.000 It's supposed to be like guys easy, but they love you.

01:54:57.000 So.

01:55:00.000 Post-Aussie Black Sabbath is awesome.

01:55:02.000 Exactly.

01:55:03.000 Right, Tim.

01:55:04.000 Yes.

01:55:06.000 Heaven and Hell?

01:55:07.000 Heaven and Hell!

01:55:08.000 I don't know if it goes like that, but...

01:55:13.000 Clarence Clearwater.

01:55:15.000 Great.

01:55:16.000 Yeah.

01:55:17.000 So... Sure.

01:55:19.000 Anyway, well, uh... Alrighty, then.

01:55:21.000 ...the call.

01:55:22.000 Jeremy is always here to pick us up.

01:55:25.000 Okay, Jeremy.

01:55:26.000 When we're feeling a little hurt.

01:55:30.000 Go ahead there.

01:55:32.000 269, you're on the... Can you hear me?

01:55:34.000 Yeah.

01:55:34.000 269, you're on the... You're on the air.

01:55:36.000 What's going on, 269?

01:55:39.000 Oh, I'm not allowed.

01:55:40.000 Just listen to that word.

01:55:41.000 Hey man, Gavin said, uh, he releases too much content for us to watch.

01:55:46.000 That's a blatant lie.

01:55:48.000 Why is that?

01:55:49.000 Because it's so good you want to watch a lot of it, I'm sure.

01:55:53.000 What content do you watch?

01:55:56.000 I work each night and I watched every show.

01:55:58.000 You watch Maddie Sheetalittle Kitchen?

01:56:01.000 What's that?

01:56:02.000 You watch Maddie Sheetalittle Kitchen?

01:56:04.000 You know I do.

01:56:05.000 Alright, that's what I'm talking about.

01:56:06.000 Biscuits and gravy.

01:56:07.000 I'm probably having the newest one.

01:56:08.000 But he probably likes, you like Gavin's show more though, probably.

01:56:11.000 I mean, no offense.

01:56:12.000 Of course, since MTV's, I mean... The flagship show.

01:56:15.000 G-O-M-O-L.

01:56:17.000 How can you go wrong?

01:56:17.000 G-O-M-O-L.

01:56:18.000 G-O-M-O-L.

01:56:18.000 Well, I listen to you guys' show at night while I'm working, and I work eight hours a night, and I only get one show to watch a night.

01:56:25.000 That's probably burning up maybe one, two hours.

01:56:27.000 Well yeah, this is live.

01:56:28.000 Yeah, you just tough up your content.

01:56:29.000 Hey, good point.

01:56:30.000 And you know what?

01:56:33.000 For he's a jolly good fellow.

01:56:35.000 For he's a jolly good fellow.

01:56:37.000 For he's a jolly good fellow.

01:56:41.000 Which nobody can deny.

01:56:43.000 Which nobody can deny.

01:56:45.000 Which nobody can deny.

01:56:46.000 You ruined it.

01:56:48.000 I was going to go to the end of the show and then you fucking made me laugh.

01:56:53.000 That would have been art.

01:56:54.000 That would have been brilliant art to go to the end of the show in a Hoffman.

01:56:58.000 In a catatonic state.

01:56:59.000 Wander off and you had to fucking crack me up with the Jolly Good Fellow.

01:57:04.000 We got him back.

01:57:04.000 We're just about at the end of the show.

01:57:07.000 That's right.

01:57:07.000 We got about three minutes.

01:57:08.000 What kind of faggot writes a song like he's a Jolly Good Fellow?

01:57:12.000 That's true.

01:57:13.000 814 probably.

01:57:14.000 He's very gay.

01:57:15.000 Very gay.

01:57:15.000 814, you're on the lore.

01:57:17.000 814.

01:57:18.000 Hey, what's up guys?

01:57:20.000 What's happening?

01:57:22.000 Hey, Gavin, I emailed you guys today about Penn State is having a black racist asshole reporter from the Washington Post come here to speak.

01:57:32.000 Yeah, I got your email.

01:57:33.000 I read all the emails.

01:57:36.000 He's not that controversial.

01:57:37.000 He's just a boring fucking lib who thinks that George Floyd... The only thing he's ever written

01:57:43.000 Or articles about George Floyd and reparations.

01:57:46.000 I know!

01:57:46.000 That's why I looked him up.

01:57:47.000 I googled him with controversy.

01:57:49.000 If he had said like white devils and white people need to die and we need to start a revolution, I might have an argument.

01:57:56.000 But he's just a boring fucking lib.

01:57:59.000 And he wrote a fucking book whose premise is that George Floyd was a piece of shit, drug addict, fucking felon asshole his whole life.

01:58:08.000 I know, but you recognize that's a controversial opinion to think that George Floyd's a piece of shit.

01:58:15.000 He is a piece of shit.

01:58:16.000 Was.

01:58:17.000 Was.

01:58:18.000 Yeah, he's better now.

01:58:21.000 But to say that supporting him is radical, it's just not true.

01:58:26.000 Joe Biden supports

01:58:27.000 Well, yeah, it's mainstream, but... Right, but if we're talking about a court battle, I need to have, like, real content.

01:58:39.000 What about Hunter, Biden's charming, drug addict son?

01:58:43.000 I don't know.

01:58:44.000 Alright, thanks for calling.

01:58:45.000 It's a dud.

01:58:49.000 For He's a Jolly Good Fellow is a popular song.

01:58:52.000 Melody originates from the French song Marlboro Has Left for the War.

01:58:57.000 Who wrote it though?

01:58:58.000 Marlboro has left for the war!

01:58:59.000 That doesn't even have a ring to it.

01:59:02.000 Oh, 615, what?

01:59:04.000 You had a beat, Dad?

01:59:06.000 Is this my daughter calling?

01:59:06.000 Hey, hello!

01:59:07.000 Yeah, sorry, sorry!

01:59:09.000 I didn't think I would actually get in.

01:59:10.000 Yeah!

01:59:11.000 That's awesome.

01:59:11.000 You're in.

01:59:11.000 Wait, you're from Tennessee?

01:59:13.000 So, Gavin, yes, how do you know?

01:59:16.000 I could tell from that accent.

01:59:17.000 Damn.

01:59:17.000 I was just there two days ago.

01:59:19.000 Awesome, we're north of Nashville, so in a little town called Greenbrier, Tennessee.

01:59:25.000 Alright, I had family in Clarksville.

01:59:29.000 Awesome, yeah, not too far from it.

01:59:30.000 But I just wanted to call and tell Gavin thanks because you basically convinced my husband to try for a girl and we have two older boys and then we got twins and boys.

01:59:46.000 But life is good and I just wanted to call and say thanks because I heard the previous caller call in about their pregnancy and I thought I've got to call Gavin.

01:59:54.000 So you got four kids, one and then twins and then one.

02:00:00.000 No, no, I have a nine-year-old, a seven-year-old, and then we had twins in August.

02:00:05.000 And are the twins girls?

02:00:08.000 Boys.

02:00:08.000 Four boys.

02:00:09.000 All boys.

02:00:10.000 Four boys.

02:00:11.000 We tried for the girl, finally talked him into it.

02:00:14.000 It took me seven years.

02:00:16.000 Talked him into it and then had two more boys, but it's awesome.

02:00:20.000 You gotta stop marrying men with long dicks.

02:00:23.000 You're only going to get boys.

02:00:30.000 Can I say one thing?

02:00:32.000 I love Nashville.

02:00:33.000 I love Tennessee.

02:00:34.000 It's very hard to find a problem with it, but just to play devil's advocate, I'm kind of not a fan of the yellow grass.

02:00:43.000 The yellow grass?

02:00:44.000 All the grass is yellow right now.

02:00:46.000 Oh, it's the winter.

02:00:48.000 Oh, yeah.

02:00:48.000 I mean, it does do that, but it comes back green and, you know, it's fun.

02:00:55.000 I mean, my lawn is pretty green right now in the winter.

02:00:59.000 Yeah.

02:01:00.000 I don't have a lawn.

02:01:02.000 Yeah, well, you have money, Gavin.

02:01:05.000 You have money and have nice grass.

02:01:07.000 Yeah, no, it's because you guys don't get moisture in the winter.

02:01:12.000 Although you had that crazy cold front.

02:01:15.000 I can't tell you how many people I met who had lost their homes or almost lost their homes to pipe explosions from that cold front that came through.

02:01:23.000 Yeah, we had to keep them dripping.

02:01:25.000 It was, yeah, it was brutally cold here.

02:01:29.000 All right, well, congratulations.

02:01:31.000 God bless you.

02:01:32.000 I'm very happy you got those boys.

02:01:34.000 And yeah, thank you so much.

02:01:36.000 Thank the Lord every day.

02:01:37.000 None of them are spazzes.

02:01:39.000 Have a wonderful life.

02:01:40.000 Yes.

02:01:42.000 No, they're all great.

02:01:43.000 Thanks again.

02:01:43.000 We love your show.

02:01:45.000 Thank you.

02:01:45.000 You know what I did the other night?

02:01:47.000 I lay in my... I was watching TV.

02:01:49.000 I was watching that Netflix show about the autistic guys.

02:01:54.000 Love on the Spectrum?

02:01:55.000 Love on the Spectrum.

02:01:57.000 And they were like...

02:01:58.000 It's Australian mostly, right?

02:01:59.000 And they're like, I just, I really hope I have a girlfriend and that she's interested in dinosaurs as I am, particularly the palimethaloic era, where, you know, everyone talks about T-Rex, but the Planteosaurus was actually the most vibrant.

02:02:17.000 And you're like, thank you, God, for not giving me one spaz.

02:02:25.000 Thank you fucking God.

02:02:28.000 And they're like, I would really like to get, and he's got a suit on.

02:02:31.000 And he's like, I'm talking to a different guy now.

02:02:33.000 He's like, I would like to get a girlfriend because eventually I'd like to get married.

02:02:37.000 And then they go on these dates and inevitably they go, I think we're just going to be friends, which I can't help as God going, yeah, uh, I don't want you guys breeding.

02:02:49.000 Um, I'm going to wreck this date.

02:02:52.000 Because they get along great because they're autistic, right?

02:02:56.000 They're robots.

02:02:56.000 They're like, oh, do you like pens?

02:02:58.000 Yeah, pens are fun.

02:03:00.000 And then they go, it didn't go well.

02:03:02.000 And I'm realizing that God is sabotaging their relationships because he's trying to cut that fucking split end on their hair.

02:03:11.000 And I just thought I'm so fucking lucky to not have an autistic kid or a kid who's like talking about Fucking I don't know dishwashers, and what about a serial killer?

02:03:24.000 That's less common.

02:03:26.000 I know fucking 10 spazzes off the top of my head.

02:03:31.000 I see my kid playing baseball and one of them is like dancing from third base to home instead of running a straight line and all the parents are looking straight ahead because they don't want to look at the dad.

02:03:42.000 Whose kid that is.

02:03:43.000 They're like, oh, I hope he gets to home.

02:03:45.000 Dancing could be like a lot of fun, you know, if you got like a- Oh, Patti Pimbley!

02:03:50.000 Oh, aye.

02:03:51.000 So I was pretty drunk, but I just went to bed with a maker's buzz and just lay in bed, almost woke up my wife going, thank you so much, God, for not giving me a spaz.

02:04:00.000 Thank you so much, God, for not giving me a spaz.

02:04:03.000 Like I felt this love coming out of my chest to the Lord.

02:04:07.000 And I don't want to disparage people who have handicapped kids or who are going through that.

02:04:12.000 But...

02:04:13.000 They're basically saying that it'd be real tough to do so they've got like a- Shut up.

02:04:17.000 You must know that you're going through hell and you must know that you're not lucky.

02:04:25.000 I mean, you must see us and go, that seems better.

02:04:29.000 I don't know how to phrase this without disparaging.

02:04:31.000 I know how.

02:04:32.000 You say like you're basically like a super parent so like you're doing the job of like two parents.

02:04:36.000 Oh, you're a hero.

02:04:37.000 You're a fucking mensch.

02:04:38.000 You're like the Incredibles.

02:04:38.000 You're an awesome person and thank you.

02:04:41.000 Patty.

02:04:41.000 For doing that work.

02:04:43.000 Oh, no problem.

02:04:45.000 Especially my wife had like my youngest boy when she was like 40, I don't know, two, three.

02:04:52.000 So dodged a fucking bullet here.

02:04:56.000 I'm so fucking thankful.

02:04:59.000 And they're not exactly out of the park geniuses, superheroes, my kids.

02:05:05.000 Like, they're no spaz, but I'm not exactly impressed when I say things like, what's eight times seven?

02:05:12.000 Don't get me wrong.

02:05:13.000 I don't want him on my team!

02:05:14.000 He knows nothing!

02:05:15.000 Yeah, my son knows nothing.

02:05:18.000 Nothing!

02:05:19.000 When I do vocabulary tests, I mean, it's clear that they're half Indian, so I'm not bragging.

02:05:23.000 He knows nothing about nothing!

02:05:25.000 I'm not bragging about my kids, but they're definitely not spaz, and that's all you really want.

02:05:32.000 So yeah, don't take what you have for granted.

02:05:33.000 We should all be thankful for the wonderful things we have.

02:05:37.000 Get fired, get in trouble, be brave, and never stop fighting.

02:05:59.000 Yeah.

Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - January 13, 2023

GOML LIVE #178 - ACAB

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