Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - January 04, 2021


GOML LIVE #79 | MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Topics
Johnny Appleseed CBD toys are about to become extinct Christmas giveaways
Hosted by
Gavin McInnes
Mentioned
Ryan Johnny Apple CBD Rudolph Proud Boys Recruiter Happy Hanukkah Roger Stone Bubba Amy Berman Jackson George Cacciavelli Dennis Prager John Lennon Ron Coleman Amy Chan Trump Lenny Clement C. Moore The Joe Pesci Christian Birmingham Kyle Rittenhouse Midnight Cowboy and 39 more
S03E55 - STABBED IN DC [2020-12-22 - S03E55 - STABBED IN DC] S03E56 - OH NO!

Episode Stats


Length

47 minutes

Words per minute

154.0

Word count

7,238

Sentence count

906

Harmful content

Misogyny

17

sentences flagged

Toxicity

182

sentences flagged

Hate speech

26

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

Happy Holidays from New York City! It's Christmas Eve, and Gavin and Julian are here to talk about John Lennon's Merry Christmas, war is over, and what they're doing while they're on vacation. This episode is brought to you by Johnny Apple CBD and the JACBD vaporizer. Get 20% off all orders with promo code GAVIN20 when you place your order through the link below. That's 20% all orders over $20 and again, put the tincture in your coffee, and you'll get the edge off your coffee. You can even get some petit cuddles to help soothe sore muscles from working out too much. Get some ibuprophen for your sore legs, and let us know how you feel about it in the comments below. Happy Holidays and Merry Christmas! -Gavin and Julian Logo by Courtney DeKorte. Theme by Mavus White. Music by PSOVOD and tyops. If you like what you hear, please HIT SUBSCRIBE on Apple Podcasts! Subscribe, Like, and Subscribe to our new podcast, PODCAST, and leave us a review and tell a friend about what you're listening to this podcast. We'll be looking out for you in the next episode of Get Off My Lawn on Tuesday, December 25th! XOXOXOXO - Julian and Gavin Subscribe to the podcast and Subscribe on Podchaser Subscribe on iTunes. Don't Tell a Friend about This Is It's Gonna Be a Good Day? Thanks, Gavin, Gave Me a Merry Christmas? -Julian and Julian, Gav & Julian, XOXO, Gav, GAVED - Thank You, GABE Gavin, - XO Thank you, Julian, GAVEN & GABEE and GABY, GRAVY, JACDEY And much more! Thanksgiving Eve! -Tune in next week! -JACBDB! - - GAVY! - RATE 5 stars! & Merry Christmas!! CHECK OUT THE EPISODES AND GABBY, GIV ME A RATE $5 & GRABED, GOT A FRIENDS PRODCAST $5 AND $10 PRODUCED?

Transcript

Transcripts from "Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes" are sourced from the Knowledge Fight Interactive Search Tool. Explore them interactively here.
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
Topics generated with Qwen2.5-3B-Instruct.
Hosts, guests, and mentioned names generated with spaCy (en_core_web_sm), reconciled against Wikidata.
00:00:02.000 So this is Christmas.
00:00:06.000 And what have you done?
00:00:11.000 Another year.
00:00:13.000 Live from New York, it's Get Off My Lawn with Gavin McInnes.
00:00:21.000 And so this is Christmas. 1.00
00:00:45.000 I cut that short because the fucking copyright shit on that must be mental. 1.00
00:00:51.000 Mental. 1.00
00:00:52.000 Don't hang your coat on the lights in the studio.
00:00:55.000 That's a coat rack now? 1.00
00:00:58.000 You get so much shit everywhere. 0.99
00:01:02.000 That was Merry Christmas War is Over by John Lennon in 1971, a year after I was born. 0.99
00:01:10.000 The beginning of the song he says, Merry Christmas Julian.
00:01:13.000 Let's hear what Trump has to say about Christmas.
00:01:19.000 I hope it doesn't get taken down.
00:01:20.000 Yeah, that was in his hippy-dippy peace and love thing that everyone was into back when I was born.
00:01:30.000 Then he went off, divorced Oko, Yoko, and was with a four named Tammy Yang or something.
00:01:43.000 It's called his lost weekend.
00:01:45.000 Amy Chan, you should be looking that up.
00:01:48.000 What are you doing?
00:01:51.000 The current card, I need to make space on the second card, because it's a two-hour show.
00:01:56.000 So I gotta get two cards.
00:01:58.000 I didn't know he... That's really weird.
00:02:00.000 I didn't know he divorced Oko.
00:02:04.000 Yoko was never... Like, you're in the Beatles, dude.
00:02:07.000 You should be getting a chick that burns our eyes off. 1.00
00:02:10.000 He liked Ronnie Spector.
00:02:13.000 She was cute. 0.89
00:02:18.000 Does your camera work?
00:02:20.000 It crapped out.
00:02:22.000 Oh, it already stopped?
00:02:23.000 I'm missing a cord.
00:02:26.000 Yeah, no, I don't think those round glasses worked very well.
00:02:32.000 You know, we're not talking about his first wife, buddy.
00:02:34.000 We're talking about his mistress, girlfriend.
00:02:37.000 Yeah!
00:02:38.000 During his lost weekend phase, Amy Chan.
00:02:40.000 Anyway, then he, he didn't really do anything from 73 to 75, 72 to 75.
00:02:48.000 And then he got back with Yoko, made, yeah, that's her.
00:02:53.000 She looks pretty good there, I gotta admit.
00:02:55.000 But he went back with Yoko, made Sean Lennon, who's an awesome dude,
00:03:01.000 And then, uh, he made this song.
00:03:05.000 And, no, sorry, sorry, 71 was the beginning of all this.
00:03:08.000 Then he made that album, With Her, that has all those hits.
00:03:14.000 Like, uh, what's the one where you- Give Peace a Chance?
00:03:18.000 Give Peace a Chance? 0.99
00:03:19.000 That's the Beatles, you fucking- Oh. 1.00
00:03:22.000 Piece of human garbage. 1.00
00:03:23.000 Why are you interjecting stuff when you have nothing to say? 1.00
00:03:27.000 I could've sworn.
00:03:31.000 No, we played it on the show the other day.
00:03:33.000 He ends it with, Good night, Sean.
00:03:35.000 Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful boy.
00:03:40.000 It's got some good hits. 0.99
00:03:41.000 And then some weirdo from Hawaii came and shot and killed him. 0.93
00:03:48.000 This is the end of the Christmas stuff. 0.96
00:03:51.000 We've been wearing Christmas sweaters every day.
00:03:52.000 I don't think this one turns on.
00:03:54.000 I've had Christmas sweaters all week that turn on.
00:03:59.000 And we're leaving you.
00:04:00.000 After this, we're going on vacation, but do not fret.
00:04:03.000 We have jam-packed entertainment the entire time we're gone.
00:04:08.000 And if you want to rob the studio, this is a great time to do it.
00:04:12.000 We will not be here tomorrow.
00:04:13.000 The alarm will be on, but by the time you grab everything, you could probably get out of here.
00:04:17.000 Can you show the ads they made for all the stuff we have coming up?
00:04:22.000 I think it's a separate email I sent you earlier today.
00:04:24.000 Gotcha.
00:04:25.000 Not that you ever check your email. 1.00
00:04:28.000 Oh, fuck. 1.00
00:04:29.000 I do not. 1.00
00:04:32.000 We're not off to a great start.
00:04:37.000 It's weird to have a beer when you're really, really thirsty.
00:04:39.000 It feels wrong.
00:04:40.000 Like you should be having Gatorade or water if you're really, really thirsty, and then you have beers.
00:04:45.000 This should not be quenching your thirst.
00:04:47.000 Make sure you show them in order.
00:04:49.000 But before we get to that, what we're doing when we're gone, let's talk about our oldest sponsor, Johnny Apple CBD.
00:04:56.000 This episode is brought to you by Johnny Apple CBD, our official proud CBD!
00:05:02.000 Johnny Apple has been using us, has been with us since the beginning.
00:05:05.000 We've been using it since the beginning.
00:05:07.000 JACBD.com, enter promo code Gavin for 20% off all orders.
00:05:12.000 That's JACBD.com, promo code Gavin, 20% off all orders.
00:05:17.000 And again, you put the tincture in your coffee, it takes the edge off.
00:05:21.000 You got sore muscles from working out too much?
00:05:24.000 You had a leg day and it hurts to sit down?
00:05:27.000 Get the topicals on your sore muscles.
00:05:29.000 They help.
00:05:31.000 You got the gummies, help you sleep.
00:05:34.000 The stem vaporizer is a fun way to take it in.
00:05:38.000 We've got the cookies, the cartridges, the isolates, and wax the supplements!
00:05:43.000 And you can even get some for your pet.
00:05:46.000 That's JohnnyApple.com, JohnnyAppleCBD.com, they both work.
00:05:51.000 And that is 20% off all orders. 0.99
00:05:54.000 We're turning into InfoWars with all the shit we sell. 0.98
00:05:58.000 I'm not going to do an Alex Jones impersonation. 1.00
00:06:00.000 That is fucking hack. 0.99
00:06:01.000 That's for amateurs. 1.00
00:06:02.000 Look at these bags under my eyes. 0.99
00:06:04.000 That's not what my fucking eyes look like, dude. 0.99
00:06:07.000 This is what my eyes look like. 1.00
00:06:09.000 This eye.
00:06:10.000 It's got a bit of a line.
00:06:11.000 But this is like, the lighting in here turns it into this sack.
00:06:16.000 And then the glasses emphasize that tenfold.
00:06:19.000 It's not a good look.
00:06:21.000 Have you got the ads ready?
00:06:22.000 What are you doing?
00:06:22.000 Yep.
00:06:24.000 Make sure they're in order here.
00:06:25.000 So we got boxing gloves.
00:06:26.000 No, that's not in order.
00:06:29.000 Please do something right once ever.
00:06:31.000 Well, this is the order you sent me.
00:06:33.000 Boxing Day?
00:06:34.000 Nope.
00:06:35.000 What's the first thing we're showing, Ryan?
00:06:36.000 What have you been working on all day?
00:06:38.000 I think this was after you decided to change them up because this is the one that you sent it to me.
00:06:43.000 You sent this to me.
00:06:44.000 This is from you.
00:06:45.000 You sent it to me.
00:06:46.000 Yeah, it doesn't matter how they appear in the email.
00:06:47.000 You know how they go chronologically, don't you?
00:06:50.000 What did you work on all day?
00:06:51.000 What were you working on before we did the show?
00:06:54.000 This one.
00:06:55.000 Okay, that's before Boxing Day?
00:06:57.000 In the email, yeah.
00:07:00.000 Take down Johnny Apple. 0.80
00:07:01.000 The email's irrelevant.
00:07:02.000 Those are just the pictures.
00:07:04.000 That's not the order they're in.
00:07:06.000 So that's tomorrow.
00:07:08.000 Yes.
00:07:08.000 So this... Go back.
00:07:09.000 So tomorrow, Ryan and I are going to be opening presents.
00:07:12.000 It is possibly the worst thing we've ever put on this site. 0.71
00:07:16.000 We wanted to show the things close up, so we went up to the camera, put it on auto, then our cameraman here, Ryan, neglected to put it back into focus, so the focus is fucked the whole time.
00:07:29.000 We didn't have anyone checking the audio, so I guess my dog or something unplugged my audio. 0.94
00:07:36.000 My audio sounds like shit, it's mostly coming through Ryan's mic. 0.98
00:07:40.000 Only check that out if you're bored. 0.99
00:07:41.000 It's pretty short though, it's probably only like 40 minutes.
00:07:44.000 Yeah.
00:07:45.000 At the most.
00:07:46.000 But it is very low quality.
00:07:48.000 However, what's next?
00:07:50.000 Boxing Day.
00:07:51.000 Traditionally, Boxing Day is December 26th.
00:07:54.000 And it's a British tradition.
00:07:56.000 Canada too.
00:07:57.000 It was originally for going out and taking presents.
00:08:00.000 Maybe presents you didn't need that you got for Christmas.
00:08:02.000 Boxing them up and giving them to the poor.
00:08:03.000 The less fortunate.
00:08:05.000 We've since changed that.
00:08:06.000 And now it's buying stuff for ourselves.
00:08:08.000 Because that's what Christmas is really about.
00:08:11.000 Buying stuff for yourself.
00:08:13.000 So, uh, on Boxing Day we'll be, uh, I'll be teaching you how to box, all my tricks.
00:08:18.000 That's a pretty long one, though.
00:08:19.000 How long is that? 0.95
00:08:22.000 That's fuckin' high quality. 0.96
00:08:23.000 Get your hopes up for... About a half hour. 0.97
00:08:25.000 December 26th.
00:08:26.000 I'm considering making it free on the site.
00:08:30.000 Oh, speaking of free, we have a new payment processor!
00:08:33.000 Thank the Lord in heaven above.
00:08:34.000 I gotta be honest, I wasn't showing it too much on the show, but I was fretting.
00:08:38.000 Because I went through maybe 11 banks that said, yeah, of course, yeah, we can do it.
00:08:43.000 But can we see the site first?
00:08:44.000 Oh, there's black people on it? 0.98
00:08:45.000 You're not racist?
00:08:45.000 Okay, that's fine.
00:08:46.000 What's your name?
00:08:47.000 Gavin McInnes.
00:08:49.000 Oh my god.
00:08:53.000 Oh, okay. 0.99
00:08:55.000 I'm Charles fucking Manson. 1.00
00:08:57.000 My name is Mud, and I had 11 banks tell me to fuck off. 1.00
00:09:02.000 I finally got one. 0.99
00:09:08.000 So then, we have the How to Box on December 26th, and then the beginning of next week we have a new show called Car Guys.
00:09:17.000 First episode's sort of an introduction to cars, what makes them tick.
00:09:20.000 And then the second episode is like a rock and roll SoCal. 0.99
00:09:25.000 You know, the guys with the crazy beards and the gloves with fingerless gloves and the horns and all that shit. 0.99
00:09:33.000 That's the second episode. 0.97
00:09:34.000 Then things get serious on a Wednesday where we go to jail.
00:09:39.000 We visit John.
00:09:42.000 I know the bags look brutal there.
00:09:44.000 That's the lighting and we'd been up all night driving.
00:09:48.000 And then on Thursday, so no live show next Wednesday.
00:09:52.000 Then on Thursday, Milo and I watch Withnail and I. That's the part where Withnail is going, are you the farmer?
00:09:59.000 Are you the farmer?
00:10:01.000 And then I says, stop saying that Withnail! 1.00
00:10:04.000 Of course he's the fucking farmer! 1.00
00:10:07.000 It's one of my favorite spots. 1.00
00:10:08.000 Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, oh, ha, ha.
00:10:15.000 It's so funny.
00:10:16.000 That movie's great.
00:10:18.000 And I don't think, with the commentary, it's a bad way to watch it for the first time.
00:10:22.000 Really?
00:10:23.000 I think it was great, yeah.
00:10:24.000 Here's $1,500.
00:10:24.000 What?
00:10:25.000 Let's come on the camera so we can see.
00:10:30.000 I just got electrocuted by headphones.
00:10:34.000 I just got cared by care phones.
00:10:37.000 So that's the good news is you get 1,500 bucks your Christmas bonus.
00:10:40.000 You got your chest plate.
00:10:42.000 Ow! 1.00
00:10:42.000 That hurts so bad. 1.00
00:10:44.000 It's made of steel.
00:10:53.000 That's smart.
00:10:54.000 She's got this bulletproof vest on which I think the people who make those could take it down a notch. 0.99
00:11:00.000 That is thick.
00:11:01.000 They must weigh 40 pounds and it's thick enough to take like a jet plane to the chest.
00:11:07.000 You're not gonna get shot at point-blank range with a .30-06.
00:11:10.000 It should be knife proof, .22s, not sniper rifles.
00:11:15.000 Relax.
00:11:17.000 Should be 40, 40, 45. 0.94
00:11:20.000 My knuckle feels nothing but fire on it right now.
00:11:22.000 With like a Rube Goldberg? 1.00
00:11:25.000 In a way, you hit my ass. 1.00
00:11:27.000 You punched me in the chest, then my ass went into the side of the boombox and I hurt. 1.00
00:11:30.000 Dude, I work out every day. 1.00
00:11:31.000 I have the power.
00:11:32.000 I'm turning into the Hulk. 0.70
00:11:34.000 I have to stop, because I don't want someone's head to come flying off when I punch them.
00:11:38.000 That's why I wear this to work now.
00:11:40.000 Yeah, you should.
00:11:41.000 And it's not like I want to hurt you.
00:11:45.000 But I don't say safety after a fart. 0.93
00:11:46.000 I'm like the dude of mice and men who squished that little retarded boy or a bunny or something. 1.00
00:11:52.000 Lenny, yeah. 0.76
00:11:53.000 I'm Lenny now. 1.00
00:11:54.000 So when people fuck with me, I go, please don't do that! 1.00
00:11:57.000 Please run away now! 1.00
00:11:59.000 Please go!
00:12:00.000 Go! 0.95
00:12:01.000 And they go, why? 1.00
00:12:02.000 What are you gonna do, bitch? 1.00
00:12:04.000 Oh no, don't call me bitch, please! 1.00
00:12:07.000 Please! 1.00
00:12:08.000 Look at him, he's crying, little pussy. 1.00
00:12:10.000 Oh fuck, here we go again! 1.00
00:12:13.000 Oh, you got a webcam going. 1.00
00:12:16.000 I got the webcam.
00:12:18.000 Show the people.
00:12:18.000 So isn't there, but they're like, did you mention the caveat?
00:12:21.000 I was nursing my bum wound.
00:12:23.000 Uh, oh, I didn't mention the caveat.
00:12:25.000 So I showed you all those things we have for the next couple weeks.
00:12:29.000 Um, and if Ryan is one minute late,
00:12:33.000 On any of them. 0.97
00:12:34.000 Or they show up and they're half, like, black. 0.97
00:12:37.000 I don't mean like Obama. 0.82
00:12:38.000 I mean, halfway through it just goes to blackness? 0.90
00:12:42.000 Or there's no sound on them or something?
00:12:43.000 That doesn't count as putting it up.
00:12:45.000 Putting it up means it's up and ready to rock.
00:12:47.000 If they're not up at 9am, every day,
00:12:53.000 Yikes.
00:12:54.000 You lose $200 of your Christmas bonus.
00:12:58.000 So let me do the math here.
00:12:59.000 If I ruin everything, I still might come away with $100.
00:13:01.000 $300.
00:13:01.000 Right?
00:13:02.000 There's six things, six shows.
00:13:05.000 Car Guys is two.
00:13:09.000 So six times two is twelve.
00:13:10.000 It leaves you with $300.
00:13:13.000 Which is almost as much as the stimulus.
00:13:16.000 We'll get to that.
00:13:16.000 We've got some stuff on the stimulus.
00:13:20.000 Yeah, I was going to choose this as the intro song.
00:13:25.000 Who are these guys?
00:13:26.000 They're fun!
00:13:29.000 Clockwork Beanie Booty?
00:13:31.000 Krusty Remix?
00:13:33.000 Hasn't even clicked in yet.
00:13:46.000 Today's book is The Night Before Christmas.
00:13:49.000 It's got many names.
00:13:50.000 It was originally a poem by an academic named Clement C. Moore, who was kind of embarrassed that his poem was kind of gay.
00:13:56.000 Creature stirring and all that.
00:14:17.000 I think it helped define Santa Claus.
00:14:20.000 There was Father Christmas, Saint Nick.
00:14:22.000 It wasn't that defined back then.
00:14:25.000 And he said, you know, the long beard, the red nose.
00:14:28.000 And then that kind of solidified it because this was such a successful book.
00:14:32.000 And then I think 1832 he wrote it.
00:14:33.000 1837 he said, OK, it's me.
00:14:34.000 I didn't know it was going to be such a hit.
00:14:37.000 It's illustrated by a young man, Christian Birmingham.
00:14:41.000 He's just like a classic British fine artist, you know, art school kind of guy, illustrator.
00:14:46.000 It's really good illustrations, though.
00:14:48.000 I don't know.
00:14:49.000 It's the perfect kind of illustration when you're reading a little boy a book.
00:14:54.000 Or your daughter a book on Christmas Eve.
00:14:56.000 So I'll have to remember to bring that back home.
00:15:01.000 You know what else defines Santa?
00:15:02.000 Let's see if this is Ancient Chinese Secrets.
00:15:06.000 Coca-Cola.
00:15:08.000 Coca-Cola had this artist they loved who did the first commercial for them in 1931.
00:15:13.000 And then, and he took a lot of it from this poem, Night Before Christmas.
00:15:19.000 The red nose, the white beard.
00:15:20.000 He was always wearing red, that wasn't a new thing.
00:15:22.000 It's not based on Coca-Cola.
00:15:25.000 And he kept, he was with them for 30 years.
00:15:29.000 Drawing the same kind of Santa.
00:15:33.000 So that's why we have the Santa we have now.
00:15:35.000 Which is why I tell the Jews to go friendly on Santa. 1.00
00:15:43.000 Dennis Prager had a good thing on this.
00:15:46.000 I told you I was going to push it this year, but it turns out, I keep telling these Jews they need to support Santa, because it's not Jesus. 1.00
00:15:52.000 He's a cartoon flying in from outer space, handing presents.
00:15:55.000 So do Hanukkah.
00:15:56.000 Don't get me wrong.
00:15:57.000 But why not have the tree and the little guy, the cartoon Superman?
00:16:03.000 Have him bring presents.
00:16:04.000 It only lasts, they usually grow out of it by eight.
00:16:07.000 And I'm not asking, the Easter Bunny, by the way, would be equally, actually, you know what?
00:16:12.000 Do the Easter Bunny. 0.60
00:16:13.000 Yeah.
00:16:14.000 Why not?
00:16:14.000 It's not Christ.
00:16:15.000 The bunny.
00:16:16.000 The bunny is, it's a pagan thing that we pulled in from the pagans to, so they wouldn't kill us.
00:16:22.000 Um, but I'm not that adamant about that.
00:16:24.000 Let me think on the Easter Bunny thing first, cause that's getting a little too close to Christ.
00:16:28.000 Um, and Christ is the reason for the season, but you can still celebrate, have a tree and have Santa without saying, I believe in Jesus Christ.
00:16:37.000 In fact, plenty of Christians don't like the Santa thing.
00:16:40.000 The Dominicans here in New York, they think Santa's blasphemous. 1.00
00:16:44.000 He's not the reason for this season.
00:16:46.000 Get him out of here.
00:16:47.000 They stay up till like 2 in the morning on Christmas Eve.
00:16:52.000 Their whole party's tomorrow night, including the kids. 0.99
00:16:54.000 So the kids are fucking falling asleep all over the rug. 0.98
00:16:57.000 And then they wake them up at midnight. 0.99
00:16:58.000 Hey, you fell asleep.
00:17:00.000 Open your presents.
00:17:00.000 They're like, these are great.
00:17:02.000 Okay.
00:17:02.000 And then they fall asleep on their toy truck.
00:17:04.000 The parents keep partying and then the parents sleep into like two.
00:17:08.000 They don't have the morning presents thing because that's Santa and Santa is anti-christian according to them.
00:17:14.000 In other words, it's pretty separate.
00:17:17.000 What does Dennis say?
00:17:19.000 Having Christmas trees in my society, it's a good thing.
00:17:24.000 It's a happier place Christmas time, thanks to Christmas tree and decorations and Santa clauses and Christmas music.
00:17:30.000 It's all great in this inclusive, this totalitarian inclusiveness. 0.96
00:17:35.000 You are a narcissist. 0.74
00:17:37.000 Everything must revolve around you. 0.83
00:17:39.000 It has nothing to do with inclusivity.
00:17:41.000 It has to do with your hypersensitivity and immaturity.
00:17:46.000 Am I strong enough?
00:17:48.000 I love having Christmas trees in my society.
00:17:51.000 Ron Coleman sent me this picture of him as a kid, and he's always been a raging Jew, sitting on Santa's lap. 1.00
00:17:58.000 In L.A., the L.A.
00:17:59.000 Jews do Santa. 0.98
00:18:01.000 They do Hanukkah.
00:18:02.000 They don't have nativity scenes.
00:18:04.000 That's Ron Coleman.
00:18:04.000 That guy's had 170 different heads.
00:18:08.000 Is that him on the right?
00:18:09.000 That's him in the gold thing that appears to be made by refugees? 1.00
00:18:13.000 I don't know who makes his clothes.
00:18:15.000 What?
00:18:16.000 Do you get your clothes from a play?
00:18:18.000 Looks like a Party City Halloween store material.
00:18:21.000 Like that nylon?
00:18:23.000 Or it's super thick velour where you don't even need a winter jacket.
00:18:29.000 I think a lot of Jinos, Jews in name only, are anti-Christmas just to spite the Trump supporters.
00:18:36.000 And before Trump it was whatever.
00:18:38.000 Those people.
00:18:39.000 You see them with like ZERO Christmas decorations on their homes.
00:18:45.000 Like not even a light. 1.00
00:18:46.000 It's a fuck you. 1.00
00:18:47.000 Orthodox Jews, Hasidic Jews, they get it. 1.00
00:18:50.000 They'll say Merry Christmas a hundred times. 1.00
00:18:51.000 They don't give a shit. 0.99
00:18:53.000 They get that we're on the same page basically. 1.00
00:18:57.000 But I think Jews in name only are irreligious brats who use their fake Judaism to shit on everything fun. 1.00
00:19:09.000 And it's not. 1.00
00:19:11.000 It's lame.
00:19:13.000 So if you see a yarmulke, then say Happy Hanukkah. 0.99
00:19:17.000 But if you see a dick, then tell him where to stick it. 0.96
00:19:22.000 Okay, sometimes our colloquialisms will not be great. 0.99
00:19:25.000 Oh, we're mid-roll.
00:19:27.000 Uh, we're proud to announce that we're introducing our censored dot TV store with BeardVet in 2021. 0.94
00:19:36.000 Look at all this cool shit we got from BeardVet. 0.95
00:19:39.000 We've been drinking it. 0.99
00:19:39.000 Here's the coffee beans. 0.99
00:19:42.000 Un, uh, chopped up.
00:19:44.000 What do you call that?
00:19:45.000 When you, you slice them and dice them?
00:19:47.000 Ungrounded whole beans.
00:19:49.000 Whole beans, grounded beans.
00:19:50.000 This stuff gives you a kick by the way.
00:19:53.000 That's why we don't have it on the night stuff.
00:19:55.000 But if you go to BeardVet.com, you get seemingly endless merch.
00:20:03.000 And then you have the dark side of Elite, El Diablo.
00:20:07.000 El Diablo.
00:20:09.000 El Diablo.
00:20:10.000 So go to BeardVet.com, enter promo code Gavin, 20% off all orders.
00:20:17.000 Promo code Gavin, that's BeardVet.com, promo code Gavin, 20% off all orders.
00:20:22.000 You may have noticed that we were
00:20:24.000 We're extra energized this week.
00:20:27.000 That's because we've been on BeardVet.
00:20:30.000 It is the gift that keeps giving.
00:20:32.000 I even saw some of the viewers said, this seemed like a particularly coked-up episode.
00:20:37.000 I'm too old to do coke.
00:20:39.000 I do BeardVet.
00:20:40.000 It's an old-fashioned coke.
00:20:41.000 That should be there.
00:20:42.000 Hey, cops! 0.99
00:20:44.000 Worried about blood tests?
00:20:46.000 Do BeardVet. 0.90
00:20:47.000 It's all the upsides of cocaine without losing your pension.
00:20:54.000 It's after one cup.
00:20:59.000 Speaking of Santa, this, like, racism culture we're in is so humorless that now they're taking Rudolph and turning it into a... Remember?
00:21:12.000 Do you remember the rebooting Fresh Prince of Bel-Air?
00:21:14.000 It's a super heavy story about a guy down on his luck.
00:21:17.000 This is a super heavy story about a basketball player from a broken home who has a red nose.
00:21:22.000 His name's Rudolph.
00:21:30.000 This isn't a joke.
00:21:31.000 Can't just kick him out.
00:21:32.000 It is.
00:21:33.000 No, it's not.
00:21:34.000 What?
00:21:35.000 Everyone thought the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, which is called Bel-Air.
00:21:39.000 You should look that up too.
00:21:40.000 We'll replay that.
00:21:41.000 Everyone thought that was a joke.
00:21:42.000 It's real.
00:21:43.000 This is real.
00:21:44.000 There's nowhere else to go.
00:21:47.000 Rudolph was well aware of the rules.
00:21:53.000 Does every male wish he had a deeper voice? 0.89
00:21:57.000 I think Howard Stern fucks with it on his mic. 0.99
00:22:00.000 Because you hear his old things, he's like, hey, come in the studio, can we see your tits? 0.99
00:22:04.000 And now he's like, ho ho ho, hey Robin. 0.99
00:22:05.000 Oh, you hear that?
00:22:07.000 He goes, that other school is an hour walk from here.
00:22:09.000 Yeah?
00:22:10.000 An hour walk?
00:22:18.000 That's like three miles.
00:22:19.000 Yeah.
00:22:20.000 On a bike, that would take you ten minutes.
00:22:24.000 Three miles?
00:22:25.000 It's not far, dude.
00:22:28.000 On a sleigh?
00:22:29.000 Who wrote this?
00:22:31.000 I would have to walk over three miles to get to school!
00:22:34.000 A paraplegic?
00:22:35.000 With a broken wheelchair?
00:22:36.000 And the bus doesn't come to this part of town!
00:22:38.000 Hmm, if only they'd invented the bicycle.
00:22:43.000 I'm working two jobs just to get my car out of the shop.
00:22:49.000 We have a zero tolerance policy for fighting.
00:22:52.000 What?
00:22:53.000 They were fighting Rudolph because he wouldn't play in their basketball games. 0.91
00:22:59.000 That's the only thing that isn't the same is reindeer is black.
00:23:03.000 Why'd you name your son Rudolph?
00:23:04.000 Are you really into German culture or something?
00:23:07.000 Well fighting isn't gonna bring your mother back.
00:23:20.000 Or is it Norwegian?
00:23:26.000 I want you to go work for Santa Claus.
00:23:36.000 And then, of course, the kids start picking on him.
00:23:40.000 You need to go see a mechanic or something.
00:23:45.000 The engine light's on.
00:23:47.000 It's kind of a good joke.
00:23:49.000 If you're gonna be teasing kids with red noses, that's in the top 4% quality riffs.
00:23:54.000 Your engine light is on.
00:23:56.000 Anyway, you get the picture.
00:23:57.000 It goes on and on like that.
00:24:01.000 Speaking of Norwegian, by the way, well, that's in racism.
00:24:04.000 We'll get to the Norwegian thing in a second.
00:24:05.000 We gotta still cover the stuff that's sitting at my feet here.
00:24:08.000 I finally got my cop sweatshirt!
00:24:11.000 This is 1.6.
00:24:14.000 This took three weeks to make, so it's not the most topical thing anymore.
00:24:19.000 It's not as CBD topical, but look, we've got Val, K969.
00:24:26.000 So the story is, back in, I don't know when, I think the late 80s, Detective George Cacciavelli, Cacciavelli?
00:24:35.000 I'm sorry if I mispronounced his name, was shot in Line of Duty.
00:24:40.000 So they named a canine unit after him.
00:24:42.000 I don't think he was in the canine unit, he just liked it.
00:24:44.000 And then they made this... These sweatshirts for the canine unit.
00:24:48.000 And some teacher just happened to have it on.
00:24:49.000 It's a thick sweatshirt.
00:24:51.000 It's really, really warm.
00:24:54.000 You can get them at, um... What's it called?
00:24:59.000 I should have included the link to order them.
00:25:01.000 That was stoopy of me.
00:25:03.000 But you can get them, they're in the Bronx, and they are at a place called Shiznit.
00:25:11.000 Maybe it'll be in my- Is it something searchable?
00:25:13.000 Because I can look for it as you tell the tale.
00:25:17.000 NRPD... Oh, fart biscuits!
00:25:25.000 I'll look for it. 1.00
00:25:26.000 I'm drawing a fucking blank. 0.99
00:25:27.000 Let's see here. 0.99
00:25:30.000 I know, I'll look up her name.
00:25:32.000 It's like Bridgeport or something?
00:25:35.000 I'll look up the dead detective's name because I talked to his daughter.
00:25:38.000 I tried to get her on the show and she kind of, I guess she Googled me and said no.
00:25:42.000 Diamondback! 0.86
00:25:44.000 Yeah.
00:25:46.000 Diamondback Sportswear.
00:25:48.000 DiamondbackSportswear.com.
00:25:50.000 Let me make these shirts.
00:25:51.000 Anyway, teacher wore the shirt and they said to the class, sorry, the principal of the school said the blue Lives Matter flag makes some children feel unsafe. 0.99
00:26:03.000 And that says a lot of shit, but two things it says to me is one, hey children, the cops are bad, they're dangerous, they're evil, and say someone's trying to rape you, don't go to the cops. 1.00
00:26:14.000 You just put my kids in jeopardy by telling them that, because now I'm scared that they're going to be scared of going to the cops, so fuck you. 1.00
00:26:22.000 Secondly, you're saying blue lives don't matter. 1.00
00:26:24.000 It's offensive to say blue lives matter. 1.00
00:26:26.000 And the irony is, Black Lives Matter is a Marxist organization that burns cities down. 0.99
00:26:31.000 It's a scam.
00:26:33.000 And they've made it very clear that what they're really about is dismantling the family.
00:26:37.000 Blue Lives Matter is, word for word, face value, what you get.
00:26:41.000 There's no secret dismantling of anything.
00:26:47.000 Alright, so we got that.
00:26:48.000 It's fun to wear, but... I have trouble with sweatshirts because they're so fucking hot. 0.73
00:26:53.000 Um, do you got scissors? 0.97
00:26:55.000 I do.
00:27:04.000 Yeah, that's better.
00:27:07.000 Why would I prefer scissors to a knife when you're opening a box?
00:27:10.000 Here's a fun box we just got today.
00:27:12.000 Christmas presents, Christmas presents. 0.99
00:27:14.000 Hope they don't suck. 0.98
00:27:16.000 We'll be in a new studio soon. 0.99
00:27:19.000 What?
00:27:20.000 Got it. 0.99
00:27:21.000 We'll be in a new studio soon, and we'll be able to store this shit, but as of now, in our little mouse hole, which you only have a couple weeks to rub, um... 0.99
00:27:35.000 I don't know where to store most of this shit. 0.99
00:27:37.000 Got a big Proud Boys shirt. 1.00
00:27:41.000 It says Gavin.
00:27:42.000 Okay, that's fun.
00:27:43.000 I'll have to hide that from the FBI.
00:27:46.000 Stealing our hats!
00:27:48.000 Don't let me do shots or coke.
00:27:50.000 I should have copyrighted that.
00:27:52.000 I wrote- I made that shirt in the 90s and I wasn't kidding.
00:27:56.000 Got a Proud Boys bowling shirt.
00:27:58.000 That's fun.
00:27:58.000 What?
00:27:59.000 Some patches. 1.00
00:28:00.000 This is way too much shit, dude. 0.99
00:28:03.000 Um... 1.00
00:28:05.000 American Hero, General Flynn.
00:28:08.000 That's fun.
00:28:09.000 This is like an unboxing.
00:28:12.000 This is from Bobby Pickles.
00:28:15.000 The Poe Boys.
00:28:17.000 Okay.
00:28:19.000 We've got, uh... Biden here.
00:28:22.000 Proud Boys Recruiter of the Year.
00:28:25.000 I think he would have to... He's competing with Mark Dwyer, whose shitty sentence with Max gave, uh... We've got a mask and a hat. 0.84
00:28:34.000 Boy, this is a lot of shit, dude! 0.99
00:28:38.000 Um, what's this? 1.00
00:28:40.000 O.K.
00:28:40.000 Loomer?
00:28:42.000 Get it?
00:28:42.000 Like O.K.
00:28:42.000 Boomer?
00:28:44.000 We got, uh... No Sharia in the USA, Laura Loomer, and then it says, Incest Omar, she married her brother. 0.98
00:28:56.000 No puns there!
00:29:00.000 Jesus, this must be his entire stock.
00:29:03.000 Roger Stone did nothing wrong.
00:29:07.000 My arms hurt from showing you this merch.
00:29:11.000 More Proud Boys stuff.
00:29:12.000 Proud Boys Iran.
00:29:13.000 Oh, I get it.
00:29:14.000 That's funny.
00:29:14.000 Remember, because Iran... Iranian hackers used the Proud Boys site.
00:29:19.000 Pardon Roger Stone.
00:29:20.000 That's, I guess, an old shirt.
00:29:23.000 Stan Black, stand by.
00:29:29.000 What's this now?
00:29:30.000 Is there a site?
00:29:30.000 Oh, okay, there we go.
00:29:32.000 On Parler, right?
00:29:32.000 There's probably a link.
00:29:33.000 Guinness is Gaelic for genius.
00:29:37.000 Uh... Kyle Rittenhouse did nothing wrong.
00:29:42.000 With a really cool background.
00:29:43.000 Look at that.
00:29:44.000 The Tree of Liberty. 0.98
00:29:45.000 Sick. 0.94
00:29:45.000 Must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of commies. 0.94
00:29:52.000 Okay. 0.99
00:29:54.000 And then we got, fuckin'... 1.00
00:29:58.000 Fuck Antifa. 1.00
00:30:02.000 He's got a good graphic designer. 1.00
00:30:04.000 He's kind of got a punky look to it.
00:30:06.000 Dirty Judge, my Berman Jackson. 0.95
00:30:08.000 I don't really get that.
00:30:09.000 Amy Berman Jackson, Dirty Judge. 1.00
00:30:14.000 Oh, she's the one who put Roger Stone in peril.
00:30:19.000 Oh, yeah. 1.00
00:30:20.000 Kill the elders. 1.00
00:30:21.000 Oh, I like the elders. 0.99
00:30:23.000 I guess there's a civil war going on.
00:30:28.000 Oh, this is a good one.
00:30:28.000 Proud Boys did nothing wrong.
00:30:30.000 I'm a Western chauvinist and I refuse to apologize for creating the modern world.
00:30:34.000 Defending free speech in 1776. 0.99
00:30:36.000 Speaking of Proud Boys, god damn it! 0.96
00:30:42.000 I got this letter from Max, I want to read you. 0.98
00:30:46.000 I said, my favorite thing to ask prisoners, and I don't think they enjoy it because they don't want to hear about... They don't want to talk about prison and their charges all the time.
00:30:56.000 They're done with that.
00:30:59.000 So I said to him, what percentage of the guys you meet in there are incompatible with society?
00:31:05.000 Like say a dog, right?
00:31:07.000 Say there's a dog that's been biting people and stuff.
00:31:09.000 Most of them can be retrained with just a little bit of love.
00:31:13.000 And it was just bad conditions, bad owners.
00:31:15.000 I know I'm talking about inmates like their dogs, but, um, I said to him, which ones are irrevocable, incompatible with society.
00:31:26.000 And, uh,
00:31:29.000 He said, he sent me back this email, and by the way, I asked Jim Gode that once, and he said 5%.
00:31:34.000 5% is a common number, because you take away domestics where they were just fighting, but she called the cops because she was mad. 1.00
00:31:41.000 Drugs, either you're fighting for territory, or you were on drugs, or you were robbing someone because of drugs.
00:31:48.000 False accusations of fight that got out of hand.
00:31:50.000 You know, like people who randomly stabbed a stranger for no reason.
00:31:55.000 Do they belong in there?
00:31:56.000 And even when I went to that penitentiary in Philadelphia, they were talking about murderers and saying most murderers just do it once and they never do it again.
00:32:04.000 So they would have sentences of like five years.
00:32:08.000 And those guys would sit alone with the Bible.
00:32:10.000 They'd learn a trade.
00:32:11.000 They would have a little area in the back.
00:32:12.000 It was very civilized.
00:32:14.000 And the crazy part about that whole experiment is they wanted to retain the person's honor and self-respect, so they didn't follow them after.
00:32:23.000 So we don't know if that worked.
00:32:25.000 But the cage thing is clearly not working, because we do have data on that.
00:32:29.000 And recidivism is through the roof in this country.
00:32:32.000 Anyway, why don't you play the mailbag thing, and this will be our mailbag before the paywall.
00:32:37.000 Cool. 0.99
00:32:41.000 Ryan, shut up, you don't have a dad. 1.00
00:32:46.000 Let's turn our eyes to Gavin's mailbag. 1.00
00:32:49.000 Let me touch it.
00:32:54.000 Okay, you ready for this?
00:32:56.000 I ran into my sons tonight at dinner and my youngest boy was like, how long is this?
00:33:03.000 By the way, he says it's about 1%, but he talked to some other inmates.
00:33:06.000 They said about 5% are just, they should be in a cage.
00:33:10.000 They're bad men, get them, don't put them in society.
00:33:13.000 They cannot be retrained.
00:33:14.000 It wasn't a matter of a bad owner.
00:33:16.000 It's a rabid dog that's going to bite you if you go near it.
00:33:19.000 The ratio of socially compatible slash incompatible people in prison is similar to everyday life in the street.
00:33:26.000 Learning that was quite a shock.
00:33:28.000 The antagonist in everyday life is the bully.
00:33:31.000 Chip on the shoulder, bad attitude, disrespectful, assertive types that deserve to have their dads put a cigarette out on their chest.
00:33:38.000 You don't find those guys in prison.
00:33:40.000 Those guys do pretty good in life.
00:33:43.000 They usually find themselves in places of authority because they can force people to get jobs done.
00:33:48.000 Like I guess they become foremen or managers or something like that.
00:33:53.000 They get their kicks from belittling people.
00:33:56.000 I don't see these people committing crimes past being physically abusive.
00:34:00.000 So, for the most part, they aren't robbing banks, cashing checks, selling drugs, and getting caught.
00:34:06.000 They already have their edge.
00:34:08.000 It's the little guy who needs an edge.
00:34:11.000 The Ratso Rizzo.
00:34:12.000 This is me talking.
00:34:13.000 Ratso Rizzo in Midnight Cowboy.
00:34:14.000 The little thief. 0.93
00:34:15.000 The petty little thief. 0.97
00:34:17.000 The Joe Pesci guy. 1.00
00:34:20.000 That regular Joe finds a way to make a little extra on the side, takes the risk, and gets caught like a retard. 1.00
00:34:27.000 He goes to jail and finds it's mostly full of idiots like him. 1.00
00:34:33.000 And then he adds, so it's like Weasley guys. 1.00
00:34:35.000 And then you go, okay, so it must be a bunch of little Weasley dudes with one or two giants that just run the prison.
00:34:40.000 The biggest guy in the prison, right?
00:34:41.000 That's the way it is in the movies. 0.99
00:34:43.000 No, being big doesn't mean shit in here. 0.98
00:34:46.000 Their faces bleed just as much as anyone when it's all carved up with a can lid. 0.99
00:34:50.000 Everyone is dangerous.
00:34:51.000 Everyone has to sleep carefully.
00:34:53.000 Everyone's eyes are in the front of their skull.
00:34:56.000 My point is, the big guy isn't the bully by default.
00:34:58.000 The big guys in here typically eat in their cells because they're self-conscious and don't like people watching them eat.
00:35:03.000 Weird.
00:35:04.000 I would conjecture that they are also sick of fighting all the time.
00:35:07.000 Like in Glasgow, you go up to anyone that's over six feet and you go, I bet you're getting a lot of fights with little guys, right?
00:35:13.000 And they'll go, I don't half have problem with little men.
00:35:18.000 I don't half have problem with little men.
00:35:21.000 It's true, every tall guy in Glasgow has to fight once a day.
00:35:25.000 Some little dude who wants to prove himself.
00:35:29.000 Murderers, for the most part, just happen to do it.
00:35:33.000 They weren't any more emotional than anyone else gets when their wife leaves them for another man.
00:35:38.000 They just put themselves in a situation where they can actually go through with it.
00:35:42.000 They are happy and talkative like a very normal person.
00:35:45.000 Here we go to what he calls the 1%, what other people seem to call the 5%.
00:35:49.000 The people who are incompatible with society are either hell-bent on being gangster or are mentally broken records. 0.99
00:35:56.000 People who are mental talk a big game and get their asses beat on the regular. 0.99
00:36:00.000 They are pleasant 99% of the time, but then that record spins all the way around and the needle hits the scratch and all of a sudden they want to kill your entire family. 1.00
00:36:08.000 They actually do belong in here.
00:36:10.000 Even when they didn't do the crime, they belong in here.
00:36:13.000 But there are so few of them, it seems like a fluke, a glitch in the matrix.
00:36:17.000 One of my good buddies in here was like that.
00:36:19.000 He went to the box recently.
00:36:23.000 A story for another time.
00:36:24.000 Classic, crazy, Italian, straight out of the movies. 1.00
00:36:26.000 A true killer. 1.00
00:36:27.000 No remorse. 1.00
00:36:28.000 Just killing.
00:36:29.000 Not a single person took him seriously.
00:36:33.000 99% of these gangstas, that's the other group he was referring to before he got into the broken record guys, say they're going straight when they get out.
00:36:40.000 They don't want to get caught up in the mess again.
00:36:42.000 The problem is they parole right back to the same projects with the same people, same drama, and get into the same trouble.
00:36:48.000 I do know a few of them that are set on getting busy in the streets after they get out, but even they crack once in a while and shout out to no one in particular, I just want to go home and be with my family!
00:37:01.000 There are a lot of people in here that, well, we call them Rapos.
00:37:05.000 Mostly they stand out, but on more than one occasion I've got to talking to guys in my electrical class on the walk back to the dorms, somebody will come up to me and say, uh, you should stay clear of that guy.
00:37:15.000 And I'll be completely caught off guard.
00:37:16.000 Really?
00:37:17.000 No way, that guy? 1.00
00:37:18.000 And they go, yeah, that motherfucker wore a dolphin mask and shook his dick at a bunch of nuns on vacation at SeaWorld. 1.00
00:37:24.000 And then I go, no fucking way! 1.00
00:37:27.000 I believe that was a made-up example. 0.99
00:37:29.000 It's like that sometimes.
00:37:30.000 Mostly they stick to themselves, never talk to anyone but each other.
00:37:33.000 So you can tell the type just by looking at the way they move.
00:37:35.000 I never trusted creepy people and I never will.
00:37:38.000 When they looked apart, you know that's what they're in here for.
00:37:41.000 This prison has a lot of them, but that's because the system keeps them concentrated in a few spots.
00:37:46.000 So, to sum it up, prison isn't what people think it is.
00:37:49.000 Living in prison is not a constant reminder that you are being punished.
00:37:53.000 Prison is society away from society. 0.98
00:37:55.000 When you fuck up in the big world, you get sent to the small world. 0.99
00:37:59.000 People can function in society when they respect others, use formalities, and clean up after themselves. 0.99
00:38:04.000 Most prisoners fit that criteria. 1.00
00:38:07.000 And then he adds, the people who belong in prison are the ones who drive slow in the fucking left lane. 1.00
00:38:10.000 What are you doing, asshole, grandma, motherfucker, Toyota Corolla, cocksucker? 1.00
00:38:14.000 I think he was trying to end on a moment of levity. 1.00
00:38:19.000 All right, so that's in front of the paywall.
00:38:21.000 We still have a lot of news to get to, but I think we've given the freeloaders enough.
00:38:27.000 We were unable to take you on, freeloaders, and indulge you in our services, but we now can. 0.88
00:38:33.000 So come aboard and get your friggin' friends for Christmas a membership. 0.96
00:38:42.000 Get a monthly one. 0.96
00:38:43.000 Get a year one.
00:38:44.000 You should get a year.
00:38:45.000 It's a hundred bucks.
00:38:47.000 And sign up.
00:38:47.000 And they'll be... Hopefully they won't watch the tomorrow's December 24th Christmas present thing as the first thing.
00:38:53.000 That would be unfortunate.
00:38:54.000 But I think they're going to be very happy with the next week of content.
00:38:59.000 Alright, so... That brings us to... The way we end every show.
00:39:07.000 Which is... Get fired.
00:39:10.000 Get in trouble.
00:39:11.000 Be brave, and never stop fighting.
00:39:44.000 Yep.
00:39:49.000 Can I take this off yet?
00:39:51.000 I'm anti-sweater.
00:39:52.000 Starting today.
00:39:53.000 I don't have to wear these for another year. 0.99
00:39:56.000 And we'll be in the new studio next year and we can turn it into a fucking fridge. 0.99
00:40:01.000 What are you running around for? 0.99
00:40:03.000 You have to go get water?
00:40:06.000 Oh, that's more important.
00:40:09.000 Our TriCaster overheats on these long shows.
00:40:14.000 So I was talking about Santa earlier, and how he's kind of Norwegian. 0.98
00:40:19.000 He seems... Jim Gold wrote a great article on Tacky Mag about the oranges and Christmas, because a few years ago, Megyn Kelly got in big shit for saying, uh, Santa's not black. 0.97
00:40:29.000 And it's just a fact. 0.99
00:40:30.000 I mean, the Easter Bunny's not a dog.
00:40:32.000 We're not saying dogs are bad, but Santa's not black.
00:40:41.000 You know, if we would just aerosol that thing out, all the dust would come out and we'd stop having this overheating problem.
00:40:47.000 I'll order some of that right now.
00:40:48.000 What is it called?
00:40:49.000 Dust Away?
00:40:50.000 Dust Away?
00:40:51.000 I don't think so.
00:40:52.000 Compressed air. 1.00
00:40:56.000 Shit, we could cut out. 1.00
00:40:58.000 That thing's humming away. 1.00
00:41:00.000 You know what's funny?
00:41:01.000 I got that used for $15,000.
00:41:03.000 Brand new now, they're maybe two.
00:41:06.000 The technology has increased.
00:41:09.000 That's true.
00:41:10.000 So, I just sent you a funny email. 1.00
00:41:13.000 Don't go on Amazon and buy shit when we're fucking here. 1.00
00:41:17.000 Doing a show. 1.00
00:41:18.000 Sorry.
00:41:21.000 Of all the times to finally get around to buying that.
00:41:29.000 Yeah, right on my notes.
00:41:30.000 Compressed.
00:41:33.000 Oh, you know what was weird?
00:41:34.000 We had to, um... I didn't get that email yet.
00:41:39.000 When we were shopping around for sites, I mean, for banks, some insider goes, yeah, this sounds political, but also, dude, don't have an auctions link on your site.
00:41:51.000 Why?
00:41:52.000 Banks hate auctions.
00:41:53.000 They're notoriously corrupt.
00:41:55.000 But we don't see the money. 0.74
00:41:57.000 The money's over at the auction site.
00:41:59.000 It goes straight to Zenoa.
00:42:00.000 It never touches our hands.
00:42:01.000 I didn't want to touch it, because I don't want to get taxed on it.
00:42:04.000 So we had to take that down.
00:42:05.000 So we'll be getting that back up soon.
00:42:07.000 The auctions will be back up.
00:42:09.000 And my notes are for sale, 25 bucks each.
00:42:11.000 It was your idea.
00:42:12.000 I didn't suggest selling my signed notes.
00:42:15.000 Oh, and we're going to have the posters, the timeline posters.
00:42:19.000 Can you go grab that?
00:42:21.000 Those are gonna be 100 bucks signed, and I think 20 bucks unsigned.
00:42:28.000 But that'll be, it's right there against the wall.
00:42:36.000 Isn't that nice?
00:42:37.000 Very high quality paper, too.
00:42:39.000 So I've signed it and numbered.
00:42:40.000 We only made 200 of these.
00:42:42.000 Rare edition.
00:42:44.000 I spelt declaration wrong, as Milo likes to point out, but otherwise everything is correct.
00:42:50.000 I fixed about 10 mistakes before I printed these.
00:42:53.000 So that'll be fun.
00:42:56.000 Um... A very Merry Christmas!
00:43:01.000 My email didn't arrive yet?
00:43:04.000 No.
00:43:06.000 That's not good.
00:43:09.000 I don't like that.
00:43:09.000 You just sent it, right?
00:43:11.000 Yeah, but it's so weird that things have to go to outer space before they can go five feet over to the left.
00:43:19.000 What the hell?
00:43:21.000 So I was talking about how Santa's- Just got it.
00:43:24.000 This was something my wife just sent me that I think I should share with you. 0.99
00:43:28.000 Dad's getting ready for all the shit they need to build and put together. 0.99
00:43:33.000 The thing that annoys me about Christmas, like my son wanted this thing last year that was this Hot Wheels fucking castle. 0.99
00:43:41.000 It was so huge and you that you had took batteries and the cars will go down this big thing and they go they go back up the elevator and they go to various it was like a parking garage but for us a massive mall that had cool tracks and everything. 0.84
00:43:55.000 It took me two hours to get together and I think my youngest boy played with it for two hours total.
00:44:01.000 So it was a project for me.
00:44:03.000 So many of these are a project for me.
00:44:06.000 Yeah, I think that's... No, but it's basically that.
00:44:09.000 It's very similar.
00:44:10.000 I think it had King Kong on it.
00:44:13.000 Yeah, it had a gorilla on it.
00:44:15.000 Who would try to stop you from going all the way up.
00:44:17.000 But these trends with Hot Wheels, and he's over Hot Wheels now.
00:44:20.000 He doesn't care about Hot Wheels.
00:44:21.000 I'm very scared that toys are done. 0.99
00:44:25.000 Oh shit, I didn't do a wrap-up. 0.98
00:44:28.000 I think we have a post thing when we talk about the collars. 0.99
00:44:32.000 Yeah, I think toys are done.
00:44:33.000 I've watched my kids' Christmas lists go brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
00:44:45.000 It was hard to cram it all into one page.
00:44:47.000 There was so much Ninja Turtle stuff.
00:44:49.000 And then my youngest boys now, my seven year olds, it's like Roblox, blah, blah, blah.
00:44:54.000 Almost no, I think one or two physical things.
00:44:57.000 We had to push one thing on him.
00:44:59.000 We're like, you should probably ask Santa for one of those electrical motorbikes that you sort of sit on and you can toot around the driveway.
00:45:07.000 He's like, why?
00:45:08.000 I don't know, Santa might really want to get you one. 0.98
00:45:11.000 So you have some toys in your thing, and it's not all video game shit. 0.96
00:45:14.000 But I hereby predict that toys are about to become extinct. 0.97
00:45:19.000 That is my prediction.
00:45:22.000 But speaking of Santa being Norwegian, I thought this was awesome, 1-7.
00:45:27.000 This guy has a Norwegian first name.
00:45:30.000 He's probably in Norway.
00:45:32.000 And their O has a line through it.
00:45:36.000 Oh, we should do the racism thing.
00:45:37.000 Let's talk about racism. 0.99
00:45:42.000 Those racist guys. 1.00
00:45:50.000 Shit. 1.00
00:45:52.000 Wait, post roll. 1.00
00:45:53.000 Post roll means it's after the...
00:45:56.000 We drew the paywall.
00:45:57.000 Because Bubba and Hanks, I haven't said that one yet.
00:45:59.000 Is that supposed to go to the free podcast?
00:46:04.000 I could text them.
00:46:07.000 Well, yeah, of course it does.
00:46:08.000 They want to be... Okay, let's make the show end now.
00:46:11.000 Okay.
00:46:13.000 Before we go, we want you to go to BubbaAndHanks.com.
00:46:18.000 Promo code Gavin.
00:46:20.000 20% off all orders.
00:46:21.000 The official Proud Wagyu.
00:46:23.000 BubbaAndHanks.com.
00:46:24.000 Promo code Gavin.
00:46:26.000 We have two Christmas giveaways.
00:46:28.000 Collar number one.
00:46:29.000 We still got a lot to talk about.
00:46:31.000 Collar number one, Bubba and Hanks prize pack, a BeardVet prize pack, and a Johnny Apple prize pack.
00:46:36.000 Collar number two gets...
00:46:39.000 Exactly the same thing.
00:46:40.000 The Bubba and Hanks prize pack, the BeardVet prize pack, and the Johnny Apple prize pack.
00:46:46.000 First two lucky callers.
00:46:48.000 First two lucky callers.
00:46:49.000 And Ryan will not forget.
00:46:51.000 No.
00:46:53.000 Okay, so now again we say, get fired, get in trouble, be brave, and never stop fighting.
00:46:58.000 Right?
00:46:59.000 Then I throw my thing.