Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - S02E69 - THE WAR ON COMEDY

00:01:04.000 That's a good band.

00:01:06.000 What are they called?

00:01:07.000 The Alabama Shakes? 0.59

00:01:08.000 Alabama Shakes. 0.72

00:01:09.000 From Alabama.

00:01:10.000 Yes.

00:01:11.000 It's a chick singing.

00:01:12.000 Really?

00:01:13.000 I wonder if she's a lesbian. 1.00

00:01:15.000 She is a mulatto. 1.00

00:01:17.000 I'm a shake.

00:01:18.000 Do you allow to say mulatto anymore?

00:01:20.000 I think so.

00:01:21.000 Are you a mulatto? 0.90

00:01:22.000 You can say mulatto if it's about furniture or food or things like that, but not people. 1.00

00:01:26.000 And that's oriental. 0.89

00:01:28.000 Oh, wow.

00:01:31.000 Not attractive.

00:01:33.000 I don't think they have lesbians in the South. 1.00

00:01:33.000 Is that a lesbian? 1.00

00:01:36.000 Can you be gay in Alabama?

00:01:38.000 It's like Saudi Arabia. 0.83

00:01:40.000 They just throw you off a building.

00:01:42.000 That's a bod.

00:01:43.000 A big old didn't. 0.99

00:01:46.000 That's a big gal. 1.00

00:01:48.000 I tend to get along with chicks like that. 1.00

00:01:50.000 Look how small that SG looks in her hand.

00:01:52.000 That's wild.

00:01:54.000 She looks like the dude who did the Humpty Day. 0.76

00:01:55.000 It looks like a guitar hero guitar.

00:01:58.000 Yeah, it really does.

00:01:59.000 Find out if she's gay. 0.72

00:02:00.000 Okay.

00:02:01.000 Okay.

00:02:03.000 Yeah, the Alabama Shakes from Alabama. 0.90

00:02:06.000 I like kind of a new kind of music.

00:02:10.000 Oh, her sexual preference is Reggie Watts. 0.99

00:02:14.000 Oh, that's not funny.

00:02:15.000 Do you know Reggie Watts is a super fancy guy?

00:02:19.000 Yeah, yeah.

00:02:20.000 He speaks perfect French.

00:02:22.000 Wow.

00:02:23.000 I think his aunt wrote the color purple and stuff.

00:02:26.000 Wow.

00:02:27.000 He's an aristocrat.

00:02:28.000 He's a European aristocrat.

00:02:31.000 Yeah, he's an interesting, very, very cool dude.

00:02:34.000 His Rogan was pretty nice.

00:02:35.000 Oh, yeah, I'll check it out.

00:02:37.000 Howard said she didn't become fully aware of her identity as a lesbian until she was 25 or 26.

00:02:41.000 Lesbian.

00:02:42.000 Yes.

00:02:43.000 Is this a coincidence that I keep putting on music?

00:02:46.000 Like, I keep hearing a female vocalist, and I go, I'll really dig this chick. 1.00

00:02:49.000 And she plays us some sweet licks. 1.00

00:02:52.000 And I inevitably find out she's a lesbian. 1.00

00:02:55.000 Your most male females are the only good musicians you ladies got. 1.00

00:03:00.000 I mean, you're good singers because you have a sweet voice, but you tend not to rock on the guitar.

00:03:06.000 It's a very mathematical instrument.

00:03:08.000 I'm not even smart enough to play it, and I'm a genius.

00:03:11.000 Why can Ryan play it, you ask?

00:03:13.000 Great question.

00:03:14.000 Yes.

00:03:15.000 Some weird Japanese gene.

00:03:17.000 Little brains in your fingers.

00:03:19.000 You have your brains where your brains go.

00:03:23.000 Speaking of hotties, I fell in love today with Allie Tate Cutler. 0.92

00:03:28.000 I'm coveting another man's wife. 1.00

00:03:31.000 She's in the notes.

00:03:35.000 Victoria's Secret's having a lot of trouble.

00:03:35.000 It's weird.

00:03:37.000 Probably because women are lazy. 1.00

00:03:39.000 This is a very sexist episode.

00:03:42.000 And they don't like dressing up for their men anymore.

00:03:45.000 So, like, the idea of a woman spending $60 on panties. 1.00

00:03:48.000 Plus, we're so horny that you could just wear our underwear. 0.96

00:03:51.000 And we're like, oh, yeah, some of those sweet fruit of the looms.

00:03:56.000 Let me try to work my fingers into that P-hole in the front. 1.00

00:04:00.000 So yeah, women don't dress up. 1.00

00:04:01.000 They wear sweatpants and flip-flops.

00:04:03.000 They don't give a shit anymore.

00:04:04.000 But so they said, let's try a plus size.

00:04:07.000 This, by the way, in the fashion world is a gigantic fat pig.

00:04:12.000 This is a sphere.

00:04:13.000 That, to them, is a basketball with shoes on.

00:04:17.000 Now, to us, that's perfection.

00:04:19.000 It's fantastic.

00:04:20.000 This is all we've ever asked.

00:04:22.000 Ladies, this is not adventurous.

00:04:24.000 You're not blowing anyone's mind with this.

00:04:26.000 This is exactly what we want.

00:04:28.000 We don't want the 12-year-old boys the gays give us. 1.00

00:04:32.000 And we don't want the fake tits the nerds give us. 1.00

00:04:35.000 But check out her Instagram feed because you can get lost in that.

00:04:42.000 Like I was looking at it going, yeah, this is basically what we're going for.

00:04:45.000 She's perfect.

00:04:48.000 Alley Tate Cutler.

00:04:49.000 I might give her a nine. 0.99

00:04:51.000 Oh, go to that one with the blazer on.

00:04:54.000 Oh, that one's good too.

00:04:55.000 They're all good.

00:04:55.000 Go to that one.

00:04:56.000 I just showed.

00:04:57.000 Okay.

00:04:59.000 Yeah.

00:05:00.000 Now, if you look at her nipples, you can see a nipple there. 1.00

00:05:02.000 Oh, wow.

00:05:03.000 It's pointing straight down.

00:05:04.000 Yeah.

00:05:05.000 A little sad nip.

00:05:06.000 That's not ideal, but she's leaning forward a bit.

00:05:09.000 But we can get into that.

00:05:10.000 That's kind of cool.

00:05:11.000 In fact, sometimes when there's a weird thing, it gets so spooky that we get into it.

00:05:18.000 Like a gap in the teeth.

00:05:19.000 She's got very interesting tits. 1.00

00:05:21.000 I have a feeling, and I'm not a huge tit guy.

00:05:23.000 Very interesting.

00:05:25.000 I feel like they sort of go boop.

00:05:27.000 Bazoop. 0.97

00:05:29.000 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:05:30.000 Like some sort of squash.

00:05:33.000 Yeah, like a ski jump, but kind of that's been squished a bit.

00:05:38.000 Which is very, very fun.

00:05:40.000 I'm not against that.

00:05:42.000 I know somebody personally that used to hang around in a group that you would be like, all right, if you like her, my gore. 0.87

00:05:50.000 What do you give her? 0.97

00:05:51.000 Her?

00:05:52.000 She's like an eight-point something. 0.96

00:05:56.000 Almost a nine.

00:05:57.000 It's strange how you just, am I the only one who just cannot stop thinking about sex when you look at her?

00:06:02.000 Yeah, she's like if she was a doctor and she was the nurse and she goes, okay, well, you got the test results in on that little boy and it's not looking good.

00:06:10.000 I would just think, oh yeah, you're looking good.

00:06:13.000 That's terrible.

00:06:14.000 He has two weeks to live.

00:06:16.000 Well, how long do I get to fuck you? 1.00

00:06:19.000 That's what we in my head, of course.

00:06:20.000 She would have to be swatting you. 1.00

00:06:21.000 She's fired. 1.00

00:06:22.000 Again.

00:06:24.000 Oh my God, that lucky grass.

00:06:26.000 I would want to be just one of those blades just lying there.

00:06:30.000 Sweet and quiet.

00:06:31.000 I kind of like that when the skin has an impression of stuff, almost like silly putty. 0.80

00:06:36.000 Like, if a girl's been her legs have been sitting on those, you know, the train benches that they have, that they always put like a little impression on your skin. 0.90

00:06:43.000 And they get up, and then they got this red grill pattern.

00:06:46.000 It looks like they've been grilled.

00:06:47.000 Looks like the man grape.

00:06:48.000 Dude, we know what you're talking about.

00:06:50.000 You don't need to write a book about it.

00:06:52.000 All right, I just like it.

00:06:53.000 She's so beautiful in everything.

00:06:54.000 Let's see her video.

00:06:55.000 I haven't seen video before.

00:06:58.000 That's boring.

00:06:59.000 Why did you make that a video?

00:07:01.000 I don't know.

00:07:03.000 Look at that dress. 1.00

00:07:03.000 She's classy, too. 1.00

00:07:05.000 She looks so healthy, like her parents always loved her.

00:07:09.000 She's always had good food.

00:07:10.000 She's never gone shit.

00:07:12.000 She's never taken a shit.

00:07:13.000 No.

00:07:15.000 Maybe once when she had food poisoning, a little piece of diamond came out.

00:07:19.000 That's her thinking.

00:07:20.000 And she put it on shit. 0.99

00:07:21.000 She doesn't get it.

00:07:22.000 She's like, is this what you do?

00:07:25.000 Where is she from?

00:07:25.000 She's American.

00:07:26.000 Oh.

00:07:27.000 That's her pussy. 1.00

00:07:29.000 But she just married a British guy.

00:07:32.000 Oh, go back to that one.

00:07:33.000 That's one of my favorites.

00:07:35.000 And that.

00:07:35.000 Yeah.

00:07:36.000 Look at that.

00:07:37.000 Look at that.

00:07:39.000 The girls.

00:07:42.000 Speaking of women, I have a fun story I haven't told you.

00:07:45.000 Oh, my God.

00:07:46.000 Sometimes their friends are hot, too.

00:07:46.000 What's that?

00:07:48.000 That's not my cup of tea.

00:07:49.000 You're out of your mind.

00:07:52.000 Let me see.

00:07:53.000 I have to frame it in such a way where you can't see who she is because she's not a public figure.

00:07:57.000 Oh, it's a friend of yours.

00:07:59.000 Yeah.

00:07:59.000 Okay.

00:08:01.000 Oh, she looks very nice there, actually.

00:08:04.000 But she doesn't.

00:08:05.000 Are you kidding?

00:08:06.000 What?

00:08:07.000 Yeah, yeah.

00:08:08.000 That's ridiculous.

00:08:11.000 I'm just suspicious.

00:08:13.000 Is she like Russian or something? 1.00

00:08:14.000 She's all American.

00:08:14.000 No.

00:08:15.000 She's Italian, I believe.

00:08:17.000 Dude, dude.

00:08:17.000 Oh, Italian.

00:08:18.000 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

00:08:20.000 This is a good news show, isn't it?

00:08:21.000 Dude, dude, dude, tune in to Tits TV. 1.00

00:08:24.000 I love that they're kind of shitty.

00:08:27.000 Yeah, I know.

00:08:30.000 That's why we hate fake tits because we go, those are perfect. 1.00

00:08:32.000 What am I?

00:08:33.000 17?

00:08:34.000 I don't like perfect.

00:08:36.000 Anyway, so here's my story.

00:08:37.000 So I've been attracting attention.

00:08:41.000 I don't know if it was that LA Mag article, but I'm back in the headlines.

00:08:46.000 And when I go home, at the end of the day, I see people like on the train looking at me.

00:08:50.000 And some of them are trying to summon the courage to say something.

00:08:53.000 They have in the past.

00:08:55.000 They've gone up.

00:08:56.000 Like one time I was reading, right after Charlottesville, I was reading about it in the New York Post.

00:09:01.000 And this guy, I'm on the quiet car, and this guy comes over and he goes, how does that make you feel?

00:09:06.000 And I go, what?

00:09:07.000 And he goes, you happy about that?

00:09:09.000 It's like a rest made after Charlottesville or something.

00:09:11.000 And I go, he was implying that it was my event.

00:09:16.000 And so he keeps sort of grilling me, but in a kind of like a, I think his adrenaline was pumping.

00:09:21.000 So he's overcompensating and being really Fonzarelli.

00:09:24.000 Like, oh yeah?

00:09:26.000 What do you think about that?

00:09:27.000 Like, I'm brave.

00:09:28.000 And I go, this is a quiet car, isn't it?

00:09:28.000 I don't know.

00:09:30.000 And he goes, free speech.

00:09:34.000 Jesus Christ.

00:09:35.000 Suburbanites aren't used to confrontation, so they get weird.

00:09:39.000 Anyway, I've managed to sort of carve out little areas for myself where I'm safe.

00:09:45.000 And if I'm with the kids, I'll wear a baseball hat or something and not go too close to the house because I don't want to seen.

00:09:51.000 But like when I'm buying beer at CVS, I get that big gay dad dude. 0.87

00:09:55.000 Or sometimes the people just yell something from the car, fuck you. 0.56

00:10:00.000 Or give my house the finger or vandalize my car.

00:10:02.000 Yeah, I've had a lot of shit happen.

00:10:05.000 And there's this working class bar near my house that if I get it like at 8 o'clock on a weird night like a Tuesday, then it's just other blue-collar types.

00:10:14.000 Most don't even live in Larchmont.

00:10:17.000 So that's one spot.

00:10:18.000 Then I have a happy hour place where if I'm out of there before 5 p.m. and I just grab a beer after like 3.30 to 4.30, then that's all blue collars.

00:10:30.000 So I just like, I'm like a truffle pig sniffing out blue collars because they're all cool.

00:10:37.000 And even when they're left, they're like, yeah, whatever.

00:10:39.000 I got bigger shit to do.

00:10:40.000 It's the board people you got to watch out for.

00:10:42.000 The idle hands.

00:10:44.000 That's trouble.

00:10:45.000 Shoot the board.

00:10:49.000 Yeah.

00:10:52.000 So anyway, I got to meet my son, my youngest son, and I'm early.

00:10:58.000 And I think, I'll just pop in here.

00:10:59.000 It's not on my grid of places to go, but it's near where he's at.

00:11:04.000 And I'll just grab one beer and I can go pick him up.

00:11:07.000 So I get in there and I pass a couple and they look kind of young and she's got a bit of red in her hair.

00:11:12.000 And I go, ooh.

00:11:13.000 Any kind of style scares me because the war on Trump and all this Nazi bullshit is fashion.

00:11:20.000 So when you see people into fashion, you're in trouble.

00:11:23.000 If they have dirt on their pants, that means they're busy and you're good.

00:11:28.000 No dirt on her pants.

00:11:29.000 So I sit down.

00:11:30.000 Oh, good.

00:11:31.000 I know the bartender. 0.96

00:11:32.000 So we joke around.

00:11:32.000 Hey, how you doing?

00:11:34.000 There's an old lady there who's pro-Trump, I know.

00:11:37.000 She always buys me a lottery ticket.

00:11:38.000 I pretend that I won.

00:11:39.000 I don't even check.

00:11:40.000 I pretend that I won and I say, I'm not sharing it, though.

00:11:44.000 That wasn't part of the deal.

00:11:46.000 I just like coming here still because I like getting in touch with the people, you know.

00:11:49.000 Obviously, I had to take a helicopter here because I won.

00:11:52.000 Anyway, so everything's going fine.

00:11:55.000 And then this should scare you, okay?

00:11:58.000 You ready?

00:12:00.000 This should make you very nervous.

00:12:02.000 You ready?

00:12:03.000 This is a purse strap, what I'm holding.

00:12:06.000 Okay.

00:12:06.000 Ready for this?

00:12:12.000 Did that make you shake?

00:12:13.000 Yeah.

00:12:14.000 The purse strap and the face is what women get when they're not just drunk, but drunk and ready to give someone a little who's who and what's what. 1.00

00:12:26.000 And they hold onto their purse like this, and they have this kind of a face like, and they don't know they're drunk as they sit there.

00:12:33.000 Sometimes their eyes are closed for just like a second too long, like, and then I just think, oh, fuck.

00:12:43.000 Here we go.

00:12:44.000 And obviously I'm not scared of a five-foot-tall woman, but I'm scared of a five-foot-tall woman. 1.00

00:12:50.000 I'd much rather just go outside and fight someone who has a problem.

00:12:52.000 In fact, at the DC free speech thing, there was this journalist, and he's like, his first question is, so there was Proud Boys at Charlottesville.

00:13:00.000 And I go, we're going that route, are we?

00:13:02.000 And then I just, and he said, was there not?

00:13:05.000 And I go, look, you want to hurt me.

00:13:08.000 You want to hurt my family.

00:13:10.000 You want to frame a narrative a certain way.

00:13:12.000 Here's the good news.

00:13:14.000 I want to hurt you too.

00:13:16.000 So rather than sort of circumvent the problem or flank it or have some passive aggressive article where you try to hurt me through that, let's just fight.

00:13:27.000 We can go right over there and the problem is solved.

00:13:30.000 And I think he got a little scared and ended the interview shortly after.

00:13:33.000 But at least that's something tangible.

00:13:35.000 A woman, obviously there's no violence that can possibly happen. 1.00

00:13:38.000 She could hit you. 1.00

00:13:39.000 She could fucking stab you. 1.00

00:13:41.000 And, oh shit, that just reminded me.

00:13:43.000 I saw a brutal video.

00:13:44.000 I might be able to find on my phone of a fight with Muslims in Manchester where this kid just shows up and starts knifing one of the women in the brawl and then running away.

00:13:54.000 And I'm like, I'm watching a snuff film.

00:13:58.000 But anyway, so she has that face and she goes, are you Gavin?

00:14:05.000 And I go, yep, Gavin McInnes.

00:14:07.000 First mistake.

00:14:07.000 Yep.

00:14:08.000 I should have said Ryan.

00:14:09.000 I've been saying Ryan now when I order pizza and stuff, so it's spit-free.

00:14:13.000 And I go, yeah.

00:14:15.000 And she goes, we had a little incident at this other bar.

00:14:22.000 And it got a little uncomfortable.

00:14:25.000 So, and I go, oh, I don't recognize you at all.

00:14:29.000 So I guess I was blackout drunk.

00:14:32.000 But I apologize.

00:14:33.000 I don't know what happened.

00:14:34.000 I hope it wasn't threatening or anything.

00:14:37.000 And she said, yeah, it was uncomfortable.

00:14:44.000 And I go, okay, well, I'm sorry.

00:14:47.000 She was, just be nice to people. 0.82

00:14:49.000 You know, just be kind.

00:14:50.000 That's a thing I'm hearing from broads a lot. 1.00

00:14:52.000 In fact, I think at the same bar, this woman said that as she was going up the stairs to everyone at the bar, be kind to people.

00:15:02.000 A, what does that mean?

00:15:03.000 B, no.

00:15:04.000 Be kind to pedophiles?

00:15:06.000 Be kind to assholes who antagonize me?

00:15:08.000 Should I have been kind to that Charlottesville shithead who was fucking with me?

00:15:12.000 Trying to hurt my reputation and by proxy, my children's reputation with some fucking blown-up story about three guys who were then booted from the club for daring to go.

00:15:12.000 No.

00:15:21.000 About a fucking rally that lied about what it is and said it was about statues?

00:15:27.000 See, this is how they trick you.

00:15:29.000 Next thing you know, you're a Charlottesville advocate.

00:15:33.000 So I go, okay, let's wrap it up.

00:15:38.000 And she's got this dude behind her who doesn't seem aggressive, but he's about my build, 5'11, 190, not the best fighter in the world.

00:15:49.000 Likely gay, because if he was straight, he would be fucking her. 1.00

00:15:52.000 And if he was fucking her, I would have got a more of aggressive vibe. 0.98

00:15:55.000 But he was just sort of like, I'm here to try to tackle him if he jumps on you.

00:15:59.000 Because I'm El Chapo.

00:16:00.000 I'm Tony Soprano.

00:16:01.000 It's a very difficult situation.

00:16:04.000 So she starts talking to me like I'm Tony Soprano.

00:16:06.000 And I didn't say this, but I should have said, if I really am this El Chapo Tony Soprano guy, and I'm going to get to that in a second, why would you have the balls to talk to me?

00:16:15.000 Like if it's the 80s and you're in Hell's Kitchen and there's the head of the Westies there, there's, what's his name?

00:16:20.000 Not Mickey Spillane, but the next guy.

00:16:23.000 You avoid him like the fucking plague or you're dead.

00:16:28.000 So anyway, she's sticking around.

00:16:30.000 And I'm just like, this is going to get worse and worse because I know how drunk chicks are. 1.00

00:16:34.000 And if you don't totally lick their butthole, they start getting mad.

00:16:38.000 And if you send out a little like, all right, I think we're done.

00:16:42.000 Or let's take it easy.

00:16:43.000 Or I'm not conceding that.

00:16:44.000 Then they start punching back twice as hard and getting violent.

00:16:49.000 What was his name?

00:16:50.000 Mickey Featherest?

00:16:51.000 James Coonan.

00:16:51.000 Yes.

00:16:52.000 Okay.

00:16:52.000 James Cooney.

00:16:53.000 Coonin.

00:16:54.000 Coonan.

00:16:54.000 They were all bad.

00:16:55.000 Jimmy Coonin.

00:16:59.000 So then she goes, yeah, I was just, you know, you were, you had a bunch of friends over.

00:17:05.000 That's not me.

00:17:07.000 I don't have a bunch of friends.

00:17:09.000 That's not, like the bar she's talking about is a little, is about two miles from my house, and it's super hipster on a Saturday night.

00:17:16.000 And she's talking about a Saturday night.

00:17:17.000 If I was there, it's because someone was visiting me, like maybe my brother.

00:17:21.000 Or I got the bar from CRTV's After Hours delivered to my house, and that was two Proud Boys who I paid to drive it out from DC.

00:17:30.000 So I hung out with them one night.

00:17:31.000 That's two, but never at the same time.

00:17:33.000 So the Max is always two buddies, usually one, and almost never on a Saturday night.

00:17:37.000 It's too packed with the youngsters, and the music is so loud, and there's yelling, and oh, Jesus, you can't get a seat.

00:17:45.000 You can't get served.

00:17:46.000 Everyone's having those stupid white claws.

00:17:48.000 You're kvetching again.

00:17:50.000 Thank you.

00:17:51.000 You're welcome.

00:17:53.000 So she goes, yeah, you were, and she says this like I'm going to go, wait, what?

00:17:58.000 She goes, you guys were being really loud and you were telling tranny jokes, jokes about a tranny. 1.00

00:18:04.000 And yeah, I came over and said that I found it offensive.

00:18:08.000 And now I'm starting to get annoyed, right?

00:18:10.000 And I go, oh, so it was a joke and we were talking amongst ourselves.

00:18:14.000 And she goes, well, you were being pretty loud.

00:18:16.000 So other people, it was very hard not to hear.

00:18:20.000 And I said, okay, so you're eavesdropping.

00:18:22.000 No, it was impossible not to hear.

00:18:23.000 I just said, now we're starting to do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do.

00:18:27.000 And I go, oh, now I'm switching, right?

00:18:30.000 From the apology, oh, well, let's, you're right, let's be kind, whatever the fuck that means.

00:18:36.000 And I go, well, I think that men can tell rude jokes when they're drinking late night at a bar.

00:18:44.000 If we can't do that, what do we got left?

00:18:47.000 And it's not like, let's say the N-word is boo-boos.

00:18:53.000 It's not like you're sitting at a bar going, I'll tell you what, if another fucking boo-boo walks in here, he's going to have some trouble. 1.00

00:19:02.000 And then like 10 guys laugh.

00:19:04.000 All right, I can see that.

00:19:06.000 That's incredibly offensive.

00:19:07.000 And it's ruining the turn.

00:19:08.000 But you'd get kicked out for that.

00:19:11.000 And other people go, will you shut the fuck up? 0.98

00:19:13.000 And that bar is very multicultural.

00:19:15.000 There'd be black guys there.

00:19:16.000 There's always at least three or four.

00:19:19.000 And they're just going to go, shit, man, that racist is really loud.

00:19:23.000 When I was there, they were playing dice.

00:19:25.000 Really?

00:19:26.000 On the bar thing.

00:19:27.000 Either it was dice or cards.

00:19:28.000 Don't say the name of the bar, by the way.

00:19:29.000 I will not.

00:19:30.000 So now I'm annoyed.

00:19:32.000 And I go, Can you remember the joke?

00:19:35.000 And she goes, look, it doesn't, look, that's not important.

00:19:38.000 I go, because there are good tranny jokes. 1.00

00:19:40.000 Like, you could say, Caitlin Jenner, you're not a man anymore.

00:19:45.000 Sort of like that woman you killed is not a woman anymore.

00:19:49.000 I stole that, of course, from Nikki Glazer.

00:19:51.000 That's who it was, yeah, yeah.

00:19:52.000 Who's special, by the way, is really good.

00:19:55.000 But as a dad and as a friend of hers, I've hung out with her a few times.

00:20:00.000 She loved Death of Cool, as I said.

00:20:02.000 We've partied before.

00:20:03.000 I was on her podcast she did with that other chick way back in like 2010.

00:20:08.000 It's really fucking sad.

00:20:11.000 Like she's talking about how guys just want to fuck her and then dump her and how that's the way guys are.

00:20:16.000 And as Joe Rogan said when she was on Joe Rogan's show, he goes, she goes, men have this cave thing where after they come, they want to go inseminate others.

00:20:25.000 Oh, you found it.

00:20:26.000 That was fast.

00:20:27.000 They want to go inseminate others.

00:20:29.000 So they want you gone.

00:20:31.000 And Joe Rogan goes, no, that's if you don't like the chick.

00:20:35.000 If you do like her, then you want to hang out with her after.

00:20:40.000 They just don't like you.

00:20:41.000 Could be the fact that you have the ugliest feet in the world.

00:20:44.000 Could be the fact that you just admitted in your stand-up special that you have about two ounces of extra labia hanging down there that looks exactly like roast beef.

00:20:53.000 No.

00:20:54.000 Yeah, she says that.

00:20:55.000 Oh, good lord.

00:20:55.000 But that's not the sad part.

00:20:57.000 The sad part is about halfway through, I'm just an old man hearing about this young lady and how lonely she is and how she's getting old and how she's never going to have kids.

00:21:06.000 And you're just like, way to go, feminism. 1.00

00:21:09.000 And she's just like, yeah, sometimes I let a guy fuck my face. 1.00

00:21:11.000 I mean, at least it means he'll stick around.

00:21:14.000 And you're just like, ha ha ha ha.

00:21:15.000 It's terrible.

00:21:18.000 It's like seeing a black guy do a Sambo show or something. 0.97

00:21:21.000 You just go, oh.

00:21:26.000 Anyway, so she keeps going, is this interesting, by the way?

00:21:29.000 I think it's interesting.

00:21:29.000 Whatever.

00:21:30.000 I got to get off my chest.

00:21:31.000 Whenever these stories happen, I go, this is really boring, but I got a story.

00:21:38.000 She goes, oh yeah, she said that too.

00:21:39.000 She goes, I'm one of these people.

00:21:41.000 She has like some red dye in her hair, which in the suburbs is a mohawk. 0.97

00:21:45.000 And she goes, I'm one of these people that think she was about 30 years old.

00:21:49.000 She was like a 6.1. 0.98

00:21:52.000 And she goes, I'm from Indiana.

00:21:54.000 I'm a Republican.

00:21:55.000 That was a lie.

00:21:56.000 I know a lot of Republicans.

00:21:57.000 I'm one of these people who like, I hate boring people.

00:22:00.000 And I get the feeling that you're not a boring person.

00:22:01.000 This is what they do, by the way.

00:22:03.000 All these cunts that are fucking with me, when they meet me, male and female, they kiss my ass. 1.00

00:22:08.000 Like at that same bar, there was this British guy who goes, oh, no who you are.

00:22:12.000 Yeah.

00:22:12.000 You're not a proper cunt.

00:22:14.000 You're just a cunt. 1.00

00:22:15.000 Like the way I'd say it to my friends, come on, you cheap cunt.

00:22:18.000 You're just a cunt. 1.00

00:22:18.000 It's your round. 1.00

00:22:20.000 But no one likes a proper cunt. 1.00

00:22:22.000 And I don't think you're a proper cunt. 1.00

00:22:23.000 You're just like a cunt. 1.00

00:22:24.000 It's like, okay.

00:22:26.000 And then he said, my mai over there is Jewish.

00:22:28.000 She feels unsafe right now.

00:22:30.000 I've told that story, I assume.

00:22:31.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:22:32.000 And I go, that's pathetic.

00:22:33.000 And he goes, no, it's not.

00:22:34.000 And then we had a, no, it's not.

00:22:35.000 Yes, it is.

00:22:36.000 Yes, about seven times back and forth as men that are almost 50.

00:22:36.000 No, it's not.

00:22:42.000 Any is.

00:22:44.000 So then she goes, now I'm getting annoyed that, and she goes, it's actually kind of offensive because a lot of these trans people are getting murdered.

00:22:56.000 Murdered.

00:22:57.000 And you're making a joke.

00:22:58.000 Like, what's happening now?

00:22:59.000 So now a joke I don't remember from weeks ago that I said privately amongst my friends is now I'm now having to get a lecture about it in the day when I'm drinking a beer talking to my favorite bartender.

00:23:14.000 And I go, I guess they are getting murdered, sure, but they're also mentally ill.

00:23:19.000 A lot of them tend to be drug addicts.

00:23:20.000 They're involved in shaky drug deals and hanging around other drug addicts.

00:23:24.000 And also, there is a big spate.

00:23:27.000 Maybe shouldn't have said this because everyone, when these confrontations happen, everyone is around me.

00:23:33.000 Like when I told you about the beer one, there was everyone waiting in line, just going, pretending it doesn't happen.

00:23:38.000 That's a boomer thing. 0.99

00:23:40.000 Like if you're around boomers and you let out a huge fart, they won't laugh. 1.00

00:23:43.000 They'll just go and pretend nothing's happening.

00:23:47.000 So the CVS confrontation, everyone was just like this the whole time.

00:23:50.000 It was busy there, including the cashier, just going.

00:23:54.000 And then at this, at this time, everyone was just drinking their beer like this, looking straight ahead, almost like a couple were having a fight.

00:24:00.000 Going, I don't know if I love you anymore.

00:24:01.000 You're coming home late.

00:24:02.000 Like it was that kind of thing where they just go, uh-oh, those two.

00:24:05.000 Even the bartender was like, wasn't going, lady, will you just go home?

00:24:08.000 You're drunk.

00:24:10.000 So then it starts to get more heated and she goes, you know, that night I went outside and seven Canadians threatened me.

00:24:21.000 What?

00:24:23.000 And I know that you follow people home.

00:24:25.000 I've heard you follow people home.

00:24:27.000 And I know that you have your proud boys.

00:24:30.000 They were driving around looking at joggers in a car with unmarked plates.

00:24:35.000 What the hell?

00:24:37.000 Okay, that is all of these stories have truth to them.

00:24:43.000 So the following people home, that's when my wife went to that activist house. 0.88

00:24:48.000 You wanted to have a vigil in front of my home after the, yes, when I don't say names, it's for a reason, Ryan.

00:24:54.000 After the Pittsburgh shooting.

00:24:57.000 So that was the following someone home.

00:24:59.000 No, it was my wife going there with our babies saying, what are you doing? 1.00

00:25:02.000 You're going to terrorize my children?

00:25:03.000 No, get out here and explain yourself.

00:25:06.000 So that's follow people home.

00:25:09.000 The unmarked car, I got to admit, that took some research.

00:25:14.000 Here's what I discovered after talking to the police about it because it was a huge thing.

00:25:21.000 I had commanded Proud Boys to drive to every home that has a hate has no home here sign and just, I don't know, stare at them.

00:25:28.000 You fucker, you're dead.

00:25:30.000 And then you can't report it because it has no plate and then drive away.

00:25:34.000 Like, would even Tony Soprano do that?

00:25:37.000 Tony Soprano would have his guys like go get someone, take them for a scary drive, like when that guy was giving his son bad grades.

00:25:46.000 No, someone stole his son's math teacher's car.

00:25:49.000 So they found the car thieves and beat them up and got the car back.

00:25:52.000 Do you remember that episode?

00:25:53.000 All right.

00:25:53.000 No.

00:25:54.000 So that's the kind of thing that gangsters do, but they don't have their guy.

00:25:57.000 Anyway, the local car dealership that's like a mile down the road had this Jeep, whatever it's called, Buccaneer, some name like that, right?

00:26:08.000 Jeep Cherokee, whatever.

00:26:10.000 Rubicon, a red Jeep Rubicon.

00:26:10.000 Rubicon.

00:26:13.000 And so people take it for a test drive.

00:26:16.000 And I live on a pretty street.

00:26:18.000 So they, instead of going up and down the highway with stop lights, stop signs everywhere, traffic lights everywhere, they turn away from the dealership and they go down by the park and they look at the water.

00:26:30.000 Then they drive up and they go slow because they're new to the car and they're checking out the dials.

00:26:35.000 That's why it has no plate.

00:26:36.000 The plate is in the windshield.

00:26:39.000 I went to the dealership and I saw the car, this secret Proud Boy car with the fucking license plate in the front windshield and nothing on the back.

00:26:48.000 And that's what the cops explained to me.

00:26:51.000 So this is the only allegation she's come up with where I can even recognize it.

00:26:56.000 And I go, no, no, no, no, no.

00:26:57.000 And I just explained to her, tried to explain to her, what I explained to you just now.

00:27:02.000 And I go, go talk to the police.

00:27:03.000 They'll explain.

00:27:04.000 It was people going for a test drive from the car dealership.

00:27:06.000 And she goes, I did talk to the police.

00:27:09.000 And they said everything about you is true.

00:27:12.000 And I should be very concerned.

00:27:14.000 And I thought, I don't believe you that they said that.

00:27:18.000 I bet they said, ma'am, you should be concerned.

00:27:20.000 They don't want to get in shit, right, if something happens.

00:27:22.000 So they probably said something like, if you feel unsafe, you should definitely be aware.

00:27:25.000 You should call us.

00:27:27.000 If you feel like someone's following you, if someone's outside your house, definitely let us know.

00:27:31.000 You know, what cops say.

00:27:32.000 And of course, in her drunk mind, that becomes, you're in trouble.

00:27:36.000 You should be scared.

00:27:38.000 And I'll bet, I'll bet the seven Canadians outside that she alleges said, watch your mouth.

00:27:47.000 I bet those seven Canadians were my two proud boy buddies from DC who just moved the bar here.

00:27:53.000 And I bet, this is just a guess.

00:27:55.000 They were outside having a cigarette and she's like, you guys need to fucking check yourself, you know, fucking trannies. 1.00

00:28:00.000 And there are people too.

00:28:02.000 And they probably said, lady, you shouldn't be so antagonistic to people you don't know.

00:28:07.000 Like, you're going to say that kind of shit to the wrong guy and he's going to fucking lose it or something.

00:28:12.000 Like, we're sweeties, but I wouldn't be that aggressive at a bar late at night to people.

00:28:16.000 That's a guess.

00:28:18.000 That's the worst it could possibly be.

00:28:23.000 And then she starts saying, this is why people hate you in this neighborhood.

00:28:26.000 This is why no one wants you here.

00:28:30.000 And then he starts sort of, I go, you're inebriated and you're not speaking logically, nothing concrete.

00:28:38.000 You can't give me anything.

00:28:39.000 I'd love to have an argument about something I said and try to defend myself and even admit I'm wrong.

00:28:44.000 But seven Canadians threatened you? 0.58

00:28:47.000 And then you went to the cops because you thought the seven Canadians were going to follow you home, just like that spooky Rubicon that plagues the neighborhood? 1.00

00:28:58.000 It's people with money and too much time on their hands.

00:29:00.000 Use your hate mobile.

00:29:02.000 You'll never hear this from a plumber.

00:29:06.000 Fucking ludicrous.

00:29:08.000 I want to talk about the war on comedy today, but I got sidetracked by her.

00:29:16.000 And I said to her, too, another thing I said is, and this is probably regrettable, but because everyone could hear me, I said, the murders you're talking about with those trannies are guys, mostly blacks and Hispanics, that are killing them or beating them to death because they didn't know they were going home with a dude. 1.00

00:29:33.000 And when they see the penis, they have a lot more stigma in their communities about homosexuality.

00:29:38.000 So they flip.

00:29:40.000 And she goes, actually, a lot of trannies are black. 1.00

00:29:44.000 Yes?

00:29:45.000 Yeah.

00:29:46.000 Okay.

00:29:48.000 What are we doing here?

00:29:50.000 Speaking of trannies, I went into Gigi Gorgeous hole the other day. 1.00

00:29:55.000 Oh.

00:29:56.000 No, I didn't fuck him. 0.67

00:29:58.000 You didn't go in.

00:30:00.000 Do people see that and not see a sad dude who's drawn on his face after plumping up his lips?

00:30:09.000 Like, do people see a beautiful woman when they look at Gigi?

00:30:14.000 I've come a long way, and my journey hasn't been easy, but why not make a little fun of it?

00:30:19.000 And, of course, revisit the past.

00:30:23.000 Oh, this is one where she washes off her makeup and then puts on a baseball hat because she was looking at pictures of herself when she was a boy.

00:30:34.000 And she has a penis still, by the way. 1.00

00:30:39.000 Google Pixel is paying for this?

00:30:42.000 I'm sure they are.

00:30:43.000 How many views did these things get?

00:30:49.000 Absolutely.

00:30:50.000 Half a million.

00:30:51.000 That's pretty good.

00:30:55.000 So this guy, Italian kid, gay, transitions, which really just means gets lips, takes estrogen, grows tits, and then wears tons of makeup. 0.96

00:31:09.000 And then he decides that he's a lesbian. 0.76

00:31:13.000 So he hooks up.

00:31:14.000 Look at this.

00:31:17.000 Now, just like the Nikki Glazer thing, I'm watching this and my heart is breaking.

00:31:22.000 Like I think of her dad.

00:31:24.000 So this is a woman dressed as a boy, but the boy she's dressed as is herself when she was a boy.

00:31:32.000 Wow.

00:31:33.000 How sick and depraved and twisted is this?

00:31:37.000 Hi, I'm pretending to be a guy.

00:31:39.000 Really?

00:31:40.000 You're doing a good job, especially the part with the dick.

00:31:43.000 That's really convincing.

00:31:45.000 Oh, that's my actual penis.

00:31:47.000 Okay, you see the kid in the hat who looks like a weird little boy?

00:31:51.000 That's a lesbian. 1.00

00:31:53.000 What's her name now?

00:31:56.000 She's from Nats Getty of Getty Oil.

00:31:59.000 She's rich, obviously. 0.98

00:32:01.000 She does a clothing line called Strike It Rich or something. 0.97

00:32:05.000 Strike Oil.

00:32:06.000 Strike Oil.

00:32:07.000 I don't hate it, actually.

00:32:09.000 But she's one of those lesbians that just looks like a weird boy. 1.00

00:32:13.000 And then Gigi Gorgeous looks like a weird boy.

00:32:16.000 So there's these two weird boys that are in a lesbian relationship wherein Gigi's penis, I assume, becomes erect and goes into Nat Getty's Vagina. 0.56

00:32:31.000 And they have like the kind of sex a lesbian would have with a strap on, only the parts are real. 1.00

00:32:36.000 So they're a straight couple masquerading as lesbians. 1.00

00:32:42.000 Are we all as lost as I am?

00:32:45.000 But it gets weirder.

00:32:47.000 You ready for this?

00:32:49.000 They want to have a kid.

00:32:51.000 Oh, is that the dad?

00:32:53.000 Did you know that all his ribs are broken from excessive hugs?

00:32:58.000 From guys going up to him and going, must be tough.

00:33:05.000 Of course, if he ever heard that, he'd go, tell you what, you fucking Nazi bigot.

00:33:09.000 I have enough hugs for my beautiful daughter, Gigi, and blah, blah, blah.

00:33:13.000 We're so in love.

00:33:14.000 Never been prouder.

00:33:15.000 Yada, yada, yada.

00:33:16.000 Okay, whatever.

00:33:17.000 Whatever gets you through the day, dad.

00:33:22.000 So, Gigi wants to get pregnant. 1.00

00:33:26.000 But she doesn't have a vagina, and her wife doesn't have a penis. 1.00

00:33:33.000 Are you following me here?

00:33:35.000 It doesn't appear to have occurred to her to inseminate gnats.

00:33:41.000 Or maybe she took so much hormone stuff that she's infertile. 1.00

00:33:45.000 No, that doesn't make sense because she talks about giving a sperm sample.

00:33:48.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:33:50.000 So in this video, and I'm sorry if this is freaking you out, but I'm at the point now that comedy is dead.

00:33:57.000 So I just look at the real world for my laughs.

00:34:00.000 And here she is talking about going to the gynecologist.

00:34:04.000 No, don't, don't go yet.

00:34:05.000 Going to the gynecologist, wherein the doctor has to explain to her what's wrong with Nat's penis. 0.99

00:34:14.000 It's inside out.

00:34:15.000 And what's wrong with her vagina. 1.00

00:34:17.000 It doesn't exist.

00:34:20.000 What?

00:34:23.000 Fuck.

00:34:23.000 She thinks that I have eggs.

00:34:23.000 Eggs.

00:34:24.000 So I'm like sitting looking at Nats and we're like kind of smiling at each other.

00:34:27.000 But like, you know, when you're in school and like you're scared to talk because you're scared the teacher is gonna like get mad at you and tell you to be quiet.

00:34:33.000 So we're literally just like holding hands underneath the desk, like looking at each other like, whoop, whoop, hook, like, when do I say?

00:34:38.000 Like, hi, I'm transgender.

00:34:40.000 Hello.

00:34:40.000 Hi.

00:34:41.000 One of your students is transgender, ma'am.

00:34:43.000 It was really fucking awkward.

00:34:44.000 She's asking all these questions like, you guys are so young.

00:34:46.000 Why do you want to do this?

00:34:47.000 Like, you're only in your early 20s.

00:34:49.000 Like, people come in here in their 40s and want to do this.

00:34:51.000 Like, why do you want to do this?

00:34:52.000 I finally say, okay, well, what does the situation look like if I'm transgender and I have sperm and you know, she has eggs?

00:35:00.000 She's like, oh.

00:35:01.000 Just pause.

00:35:02.000 What does the situation look like if I have a penis and she has a vagina? 1.00

00:35:08.000 Well, I guess we could go back to the birds and the bees, but put it in.

00:35:13.000 Put it in.

00:35:14.000 Shake it around.

00:35:15.000 Do you think they don't have sex that way? 0.72

00:35:17.000 Because it goes against their gender? 0.96

00:35:19.000 Well, this is where my mind really boggles.

00:35:21.000 Does Nate eat her out?

00:35:22.000 Like, does she just sort of treat the...

00:35:34.000 Like, you just lick it or something?

00:35:38.000 It seems like a strange thing.

00:35:39.000 It's sort of like eating a hot dog sideways, or if you want to eat a hot dog, but you don't like that, you just cut a hole in your stomach and stick it in.

00:35:48.000 Yeah, how to eat out a non-op trans woman. 1.00

00:35:51.000 Just blow it.

00:35:52.000 It's very, very efficient.

00:35:55.000 So listen to this.

00:35:57.000 This is the clown world that they create for themselves, and then they run into the little roadblocks like they basically need teriology to get out of and say one times one equals two.

00:36:07.000 Show me a straight line.

00:36:09.000 They need different symbos.

00:36:11.000 I can't give birth to my own child, Gigi says, admitting she feels inferior to women who can. 0.83

00:36:18.000 I mean, can we just sit and digest that sentence, please?

00:36:22.000 It's just like, do, do, do, do, do.

00:36:25.000 Do you have any problems as a woman?

00:36:26.000 There's a few things that bother me.

00:36:28.000 Well, the fact that I have a huge cock and balls and I can't give birth to my own child.

00:36:28.000 Like what?

00:36:34.000 Oh, you mean like a dude?

00:36:37.000 I guess it is kind of like a dude.

00:36:38.000 I don't know.

00:36:39.000 I don't really think so.

00:36:40.000 Yeah, I see what you're saying.

00:36:42.000 I get the analogy.

00:36:43.000 I get the analogy.

00:36:44.000 Yeah, yeah.

00:36:44.000 I get what you're alluding to.

00:36:47.000 This is why I'm getting lectures in bars, by the way, for not going, oh, you can't give birth to your own child?

00:36:51.000 Oh, yeah, because your ovaries are neo-ovaries. 1.00

00:36:54.000 That's an actual term.

00:36:56.000 But it's still embarrassing to me, and that's just how I feel.

00:36:58.000 It's a sensitive subject.

00:37:00.000 I feel as much, if not more, than a genetic woman.

00:37:03.000 What the fuck does that mean?

00:37:05.000 I'm more than a woman, bitch. 1.00

00:37:09.000 And that's not comparing.

00:37:10.000 That's how I felt even before I came out as transgender.

00:37:13.000 That reminds me of that letter we got.

00:37:14.000 Remember that British woman who said there's a weird animosity towards women where they're like, hey, and they showed that RuPaul or whatever it was, that video where they're like, you better get it together, girl. 0.72

00:37:23.000 We're taking over the show now.

00:37:24.000 You drop the ball and we're wearing way more makeup.

00:37:27.000 Fuck you, whore. 1.00

00:37:29.000 A lot of resentment there.

00:37:30.000 Yeah.

00:37:30.000 Like, remember that weirdo tranny kid in Vancouver who's suing all those people?

00:37:36.000 And he got a chick kicked off of Twitter, Jordan Peterson's friend, co-worker, because he was like, yeah, you got your big fucking loose pussy from giving birth. 0.93

00:37:49.000 Oh, you're gross.

00:37:50.000 Jessica Yagiv.

00:37:51.000 Yeah, I got a tight little sweet pussy. 1.00

00:37:53.000 Meanwhile, he's talking about his butthole.

00:37:56.000 Your pussy's loose. 1.00

00:37:58.000 Mine is in the back.

00:37:59.000 And shit comes out inside of it, but it's tight.

00:38:01.000 I'm sorry for saying.

00:38:02.000 We got to go to the gynecologist.

00:38:02.000 Oh, my God.

00:38:04.000 You have feces coming out of your vagina? 1.00

00:38:06.000 Yeah.

00:38:07.000 That's fine.

00:38:08.000 It has a rectum attached to it. 0.88

00:38:11.000 Your vagina has a rectum? 1.00

00:38:11.000 What? 1.00

00:38:13.000 Where do you poo?

00:38:14.000 I don't poo.

00:38:16.000 You don't poo, yet feces comes. 0.99

00:38:18.000 I mean, you should be at a medical conference right now.

00:38:22.000 It is sad.

00:38:23.000 The sadness is there.

00:38:24.000 I feel it.

00:38:24.000 Yeah, we're normalizing mental illness with this person.

00:38:28.000 At least admit with this person.

00:38:30.000 Blair White thinks he's a nut bar.

00:38:33.000 She is a trans woman.

00:38:35.000 Is this a normal dude or a normal anything?

00:38:35.000 Look at this guy.

00:38:39.000 Scooting around on a rascal that he doesn't even need.

00:38:44.000 Anyway.

00:38:45.000 Yeah, Jessica Suiette of Rebel did a really good piece on them.

00:38:51.000 Yaneve, I keep saying she, but I mean Yanive, whatever, went in to go get, they said that they wouldn't serve, like a McDonald's wouldn't serve her French fries because she was trans. 0.99

00:39:00.000 And they go in and she was lying.

00:39:02.000 But no, Jessica also says that they wouldn't wax her cock and balls. 1.00

00:39:06.000 Right.

00:39:07.000 Which we talked about this in the show before.

00:39:08.000 I don't think you can wax a bag.

00:39:10.000 You can't wax a bag.

00:39:11.000 I haven't tried, but it's it comes with you.

00:39:15.000 I would agree with you.

00:39:16.000 It's easy to wax a desk or a chest even.

00:39:19.000 It's not going anywhere.

00:39:20.000 The bag will come with you.

00:39:23.000 The bag wants to join you.

00:39:24.000 Put pressure around maybe get it cold.

00:39:27.000 Ah, that would work.

00:39:28.000 Yeah.

00:39:29.000 Then you're freezing my Wabos.

00:39:31.000 I don't know.

00:39:32.000 Why are you doing that?

00:39:34.000 It's sort of like, remember when you're on a first date and you're taking off a girl's bra and the tits are following the bra?

00:39:40.000 As you take the bra off and you're like, stay there, stay there, stay there.

00:39:44.000 It's like when I go outside and I don't want my dog to follow me.

00:39:46.000 I'm like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

00:39:49.000 Stop coming.

00:39:50.000 Like, it's like a slinky.

00:39:51.000 It keeps joining you.

00:39:52.000 And you're like, no, no, you're not invited to this party.

00:39:54.000 You guys stay way back by the chest.

00:39:56.000 I'm like, no.

00:39:57.000 They're like sloths.

00:39:58.000 No, we're coming.

00:40:01.000 We're joining you.

00:40:03.000 That's what a bag looks like.

00:40:04.000 It's like getting a hair off a shower wall.

00:40:05.000 Either it's on your person or the wall.

00:40:08.000 So I don't know what's going on with these people's genitalia, but if she can give a sperm sample, and I think I also read, I think I also read that they were trying.

00:40:22.000 So just fuck more. 0.92

00:40:24.000 Anyway, go back to her talking about, so eventually, after wasting this doctor's time, Gigi explains, oh, by the way, I have a dick.

00:40:34.000 Oh, oh, okay.

00:40:37.000 So for you, it's a lot easier.

00:40:39.000 To me.

00:40:39.000 And I was like, oh my God, great.

00:40:42.000 Call me a man.

00:40:43.000 She was like, oh my God, I'm so sorry.

00:40:43.000 Why don't you?

00:40:45.000 I had no idea and all that stuff.

00:40:46.000 And I was like, thank you.

00:40:47.000 No, but on the reel, I was like, oh, my God, thank God.

00:40:50.000 I got that off my fucking chest.

00:40:51.000 So what she knew, she handed us both folders, different folders, mind you.

00:40:55.000 And she said, this is basically your homework.

00:40:58.000 And if you want to go make an appointment, you can go meet with a nurse outside.

00:41:02.000 So we go meet with the nurse.

00:41:03.000 She puts us in another room.

00:41:05.000 We're sitting.

00:41:08.000 Let's clean the palette with some normal girls. 1.00

00:41:11.000 Okay.

00:41:12.000 Okay.

00:41:12.000 I feel like everything was so colorful and beautiful and pure when we were showing that plus size model.

00:41:18.000 And now I just, I feel like dirty.

00:41:21.000 I have to wash the inside of my body from Clown World.

00:41:23.000 Anyway, I got a bunch more videos of her crying about her sperm sample and them trying to have a baby, but you get the idea.

00:41:29.000 It's clearly mental illness.

00:41:32.000 But remember when we had that chick, Mary Sinfiltre?

00:41:36.000 Mary the Infiltrator on the show?

00:41:41.000 Apparently, she's a ripoff of another chick named Zazon. 1.00

00:41:45.000 And what they do is both of these girls...

00:41:53.000 Remember last week she crashed a thing and everyone said, Gigi had dashed her fashion dreams.

00:41:59.000 No, she was fucking with you. 1.00

00:42:00.000 She's a prankster. 1.00

00:42:01.000 She wasn't trying to get into fashion. 0.99

00:42:03.000 She was saying, fuck you. 0.98

00:42:04.000 So I thought that picture was important to show.

00:42:06.000 But what they're both doing is going up to people with hidden cameras.

00:42:12.000 And I actually suggested this to James O'Keefe a long time ago, where instead of, or not exclusive, instead of exclusively exposing political fraud and lies and crime and corruption, what about comedy, Project Veritas, where you just, you're annoying.

00:42:27.000 And that's what these girls do. 1.00

00:42:29.000 And I thought it was interesting to mention because, is that Daily Mail?

00:42:34.000 No, that's Pure Break, right?

00:42:36.000 It kind of brings up the question is what is what is an homage and what is ripping off?

00:42:45.000 No, not Lena Dunham.

00:42:47.000 I'm not talking about Lena Dunham, you tard. 1.00

00:42:50.000 It's only Daily Mail when I see there for this asshole.

00:42:53.000 Yeah, so forget that.

00:42:54.000 Okay.

00:42:55.000 So next you go looking for love.

00:42:59.000 Gotcha.

00:43:03.000 What do you mean, gotcha?

00:43:04.000 You don't got me.

00:43:05.000 It's one link down from the link you just clicked on.

00:43:11.000 So this is this other chick who does it. 0.99

00:43:14.000 And she just sits outside a flower place and goes, Hi, I'm really lonely.

00:43:18.000 Can you buy me a flower and ask me on a date?

00:43:23.000 just tell me that I'm beautiful?

00:43:34.000 Just give me a kiss.

00:43:35.000 Make me feel loved.

00:43:39.000 This is art.

00:43:41.000 Excuse me, mademoiselle, I saw you in front of the flowers, I wanted to offer you flowers.

00:43:43.000 Oh, it's great.

00:43:44.000 Oh, thank you very much.

00:43:45.000 I wish you a good day, you are great.

00:43:47.000 So she's told him to go and buy her flowers.

00:43:56.000 Anyway, we can't understand that.

00:43:59.000 Look, it keeps working now.

00:44:04.000 Go back.

00:44:08.000 You know what I get from this?

00:44:09.000 Men are just really cool and nice.

00:44:11.000 I don't think this would work the other way around.

00:44:13.000 If you get some losers, like, oh my god, no.

00:44:15.000 And it shouldn't work the other way around.

00:44:16.000 Women and men are not the same. 1.00

00:44:18.000 That's true.

00:44:18.000 But they hear her and they think maybe she just got dumped.

00:44:20.000 LAUGHTER Pretty good.

00:44:33.000 And this is Zazon's first ever where she pretends she's taking a call on the train, even though she has no earpiece or anything, and then says, my friend's coming.

00:44:46.000 Can you move?

00:44:48.000 The reason I'm bringing this up is because it's kind of cool to see that other cultures can be funny and weird.

00:44:54.000 Turn it up, obviously.

00:44:56.000 Is it funny?

00:44:58.000 Uh, yeah, it's a net, yeah.

00:45:02.000 Pardon?

00:45:03.000 A color.

00:45:04.000 Well, listen, yeah.

00:45:08.000 The bag and everything, yeah.

00:45:10.000 I'll ask.

00:45:11.000 In any case, yeah, yeah, tomorrow.

00:45:14.000 Okay, no problem.

00:45:16.000 Yes, yes, tomorrow.

00:45:17.000 No problem.

00:45:18.000 In fact, I was with a girlfriend on the phone, and tomorrow we'll be two.

00:45:23.000 So, it would be a problem to put you in a way.

00:45:25.000 So just pause.

00:45:26.000 She said, hi, I was just talking to my friend on the phone, and we're two, so you're going to have to move.

00:45:32.000 And she's been on no head, no AirPods.

00:45:35.000 This is pre-AirPods.

00:45:37.000 And no one knows if she's insane or she has the smallest earpiece imaginable that is invisible to the human eye. 0.88

00:45:44.000 You're both asses here, so if you could put you somewhere else, I don't know, even here in front, it's not a problem.

00:45:51.000 See, I'm making you love women again after that weird Gigi Gorgeous thing. 0.83

00:45:56.000 I don't know about you.

00:45:57.000 This is working for me.

00:45:59.000 Oh, you know what happened?

00:46:00.000 He jumped up because all this lunacy made him realize he was missing his stop.

00:46:04.000 Oh, that's great.

00:46:05.000 Yeah, look at him.

00:46:06.000 That freeze frame right there.

00:46:07.000 And then her face is.

00:46:12.000 Look at that little mischievous smile.

00:46:15.000 French chicks are awesome. 1.00

00:46:16.000 They're cunts, though, for the first three days. 0.95

00:46:19.000 It's really hard to get through to them.

00:46:20.000 All French people are like that. 1.00

00:46:22.000 They're super mean and nasty.

00:46:23.000 And then once you get through the final barrier, friends for life.

00:46:47.000 Same joke.

00:46:48.000 My friend's coming, you have to move.

00:46:49.000 I think she's saying she doesn't like kids.

00:47:00.000 They get too close to her, it gives her a headache.

00:47:05.000 So, other people are being funny, but here in America, we seem to be having some comedy troubles.

00:47:12.000 And I saw a tweet from Mark Marin yesterday where he said, Shut up.

00:47:17.000 There's no war on comedy.

00:47:19.000 Stop being a bitch. 1.00

00:47:20.000 Comedy's not getting too woke.

00:47:22.000 You just have to be better.

00:47:23.000 And if that's hard for you, well, then you were never that good.

00:47:26.000 There's still tons of cool scenes where you can be edgy.

00:47:30.000 And he's in total denial.

00:47:31.000 Anyway, I want to do, just to just to re-solidify the fact that there is a war on humor and fun in this country, I want to give you 10 examples of the war on comedy and why Mark Maron is totally wrong.

00:47:46.000 Let's go to the green room, shall we?

00:47:57.000 There's no war on comedy.

00:47:59.000 No, no, no, no, no.

00:48:00.000 It's fine.

00:48:01.000 No, it's just we don't want you saying retard to someone with Down syndrome or yelling the N-word at a black family who are at the zoo, even though that gives you immense pleasure and everyone loves it because that's the culture we live in, a racist, bigoted, horrible hellhole.

00:48:16.000 Just don't do that anymore.

00:48:18.000 And if that is the thing that's holding you back, then you were a shitty comedian.

00:48:23.000 Oh, oh, and all the other fat, ugly lesbians and loser nerd, weird trans people who are now pushed to the front with affirmative action, they belong there. 1.00

00:48:34.000 And all the other people complaining, they're just whiny bitches. 1.00

00:48:38.000 All right?

00:48:39.000 That's the gist here of Mark Maron had a tweet that all these loser comedians are going, nailed it.

00:48:45.000 What does he say?

00:48:46.000 Mark fucking Marin, folks.

00:48:48.000 This is by Dan Telfer.

00:48:50.000 He was the editor of Mad Magazine and helped it go politically correct.

00:48:53.000 Now, if you pick up Mad Magazine, you'll see an article, a comic on how to know he's not that into you.

00:48:59.000 And it's two gay guys, where one of them's too horny and stuff. 0.97

00:49:01.000 And every single picture has every single race, and it's really tedious. 0.68

00:49:05.000 And Mad Magazine is done now.

00:49:07.000 I don't know if you know this, but they stopped printing new stuff.

00:49:10.000 Now they just recycle old stuff.

00:49:11.000 You know, like Howard Stern will have that channel where they dig in the crates.

00:49:15.000 That's all Mad Magazine is.

00:49:16.000 So he ruined Mad Magazine.

00:49:18.000 And he loves this kind of shit because PC, political correctness, is very beneficial to losers and cunts, basically.

00:49:28.000 Losers like it because they get a job and all of a sudden they're performing at a comedy club they don't belong at.

00:49:34.000 And cunts like it because they can use it against their enemies. 0.97

00:49:37.000 And everyone I disagree with is Hitler and let's deplatform them and let's try to hurt Trump with it. 0.55

00:49:41.000 Let's get Trump deplatformed.

00:49:43.000 Anyway, look at Mark Maron's stunning denial of the war on comedy.

00:49:47.000 There's plenty of people being funny right now.

00:49:49.000 Not only being funny, but being really fucking funny.

00:49:52.000 Legion of skanks and rich people who can afford to get fired. 1.00

00:49:56.000 That's about it.

00:49:58.000 There are still lines to be rode.

00:50:00.000 If you'd like to write a line, you can still write a line.

00:50:01.000 If you want to take chances, you can still take chances.

00:50:03.000 Really, the only thing that's off the table culturally at this juncture, and not even entirely, is shamelessly punching down for the sheer joy of hurting people, for the sheer excitement and laughter that some people get from causing people pain.

00:50:19.000 What the fuck are you talking about?

00:50:22.000 What are you talking about?

00:50:25.000 Like that sarcastic intro I did is all there.

00:50:29.000 Hey, everyone, how about handicap people?

00:50:31.000 Oh, I'm in a wheelchair.

00:50:34.000 Oh, that makes me feel so good.

00:50:35.000 And the audience loves it when you make fun of paraplegics.

00:50:39.000 What the fuck is he talking about?

00:50:43.000 For making people uncomfortable, from making people feel excluded.

00:50:46.000 You know, that excitement.

00:50:49.000 As I've said before, if you're too intimidated to try to do comedy like that, you just weren't good or you're maybe just insensitive, blah, blah, blah.

00:50:56.000 This is the old trope with PC culture.

00:50:58.000 They go, I need a bunch of bathrooms. 1.00

00:51:00.000 I need you to ask me my pronouns.

00:51:02.000 I'm not doing that.

00:51:03.000 You can't even ask one pronoun.

00:51:05.000 It's that hard for you not to hurt people, not to crush people.

00:51:09.000 You're hurting me.

00:51:12.000 So I just want to acknowledge, I just want to show you 10 examples that prove unequivocally, beyond the shadow of a doubt, that there is a war on comedy.

00:51:21.000 I think the only controversy left is, is it ruined?

00:51:25.000 Is it Dresden in 1946?

00:51:29.000 Or is there still hope?

00:51:30.000 I just made hope sound like Nazis can win. 0.99

00:51:34.000 I should.

00:51:34.000 Good thing I'm off Twitter.

00:51:36.000 And I don't say horrible things like that.

00:51:37.000 Now, before I get to this list of 10, I want to tell you some things I excluded.

00:51:42.000 Like Kevin Hart and Tracy Morgan had jokes about beating up their sons if they were gay.

00:51:48.000 That's offensive.

00:51:48.000 All right, fine.

00:51:49.000 I'll give you that.

00:51:51.000 Louis C.K., his career has been nuclear bombed, but the impetus for that was him beating off in front of girls.

00:52:00.000 Concentrally, by the way.

00:52:02.000 But that's more of a Me Too thing.

00:52:04.000 That's a whole other video.

00:52:07.000 All right.

00:52:08.000 Oh, and I also didn't include Bill Burr.

00:52:08.000 So let's.

00:52:10.000 Bill Burr has a special out called Paper Tiger that he purports is as politically incorrect as Dave Chappelle's.

00:52:19.000 Here we go.

00:52:20.000 And it is at the beginning.

00:52:22.000 But then he shits on white people and brags about his black wife, and that gives him a pass to get out there.

00:52:30.000 So he's a very cunning marketer because he managed to get the Dave Chappelle clout while doing politically correct comedy.

00:52:38.000 And I know that sounds crazy, but watch it.

00:52:40.000 The second half is very PC.

00:52:41.000 All right, let's start with number one, Todd Phillips.

00:52:44.000 One.

00:52:45.000 We should have like a card saying one.

00:52:47.000 Todd Phillips left comedy to make the Joker because woke culture ruined the genre. 0.80

00:52:52.000 And he said to Vanity Fair, I'll tell you why comedies don't work anymore.

00:52:58.000 Because all the fucking funny guys are like, fuck this shit.

00:53:01.000 I don't want to offend you.

00:53:02.000 The end.

00:53:03.000 You know what I just remembered?

00:53:05.000 Brett Ratner was at a Q ⁇ A for his movie Tower Heights.

00:53:08.000 I don't like Brett Ratner, but that's neither here nor there.

00:53:10.000 And someone asked him, hey, did Eddie Murphy, Eddie Murphy's famous for never memorizing his lines.

00:53:15.000 So they go, was it Ad Lib?

00:53:16.000 Did you guys rehearse or did you just wing it?

00:53:18.000 What they really wanted him to say, by the way, I'm off at a tangent now, is Eddie Murphy's a nightmare to work with.

00:53:23.000 He just makes up shit, the whole movie.

00:53:25.000 But so they asked him that, maybe he had a few drinks.

00:53:28.000 It's like two in the morning.

00:53:29.000 And Brett Ratner goes, ah, rehearsals are for fags. 1.00

00:53:32.000 Oh, no.

00:53:34.000 Rehearsing is for fags. 1.00

00:53:37.000 Clearly a joke.

00:53:38.000 And if you really want to get into the syntax of it, it's kind of a parody of the way we talked about gays when we were 10 years old.

00:53:45.000 So he had to go on an apology tour.

00:53:46.000 And I think he was going to produce the Oscars or something.

00:53:49.000 And that was canceled.

00:53:50.000 And then Eddie Murphy refused to host them in solidarity with him.

00:53:54.000 It was a major catastrophe.

00:53:56.000 Yeah.

00:53:57.000 And this was before things got really bad.

00:54:00.000 So sorry.

00:54:00.000 All right.

00:54:01.000 That was a Brett Ratner tangent included in Todd Phillips.

00:54:05.000 Number two, let's ask Seinfeld if comedy is being canceled, if there's a war on comedy.

00:54:10.000 And he says political correctness will destroy comedy.

00:54:14.000 In that article, he talks about how Seinfeld said college students don't understand racism and sexism.

00:54:21.000 They just want to use these words.

00:54:22.000 That's racist.

00:54:22.000 That's sexist.

00:54:23.000 That's prejudice.

00:54:24.000 They don't even know what the fuck they're talking about.

00:54:27.000 Similarly, number three, Ricky Gervais.

00:54:30.000 Now, Ricky Gervais was on comedians in cars getting coffee, and he was with the aforementioned Seinfeld.

00:54:38.000 And he said, the thing I love about New York is everyone's different.

00:54:42.000 And then Gervais goes, that's true everywhere.

00:54:44.000 And where would that not be true?

00:54:45.000 And then as a joke, Seinfeld goes, I don't know, China?

00:54:48.000 Which actually isn't a joke.

00:54:50.000 I heard the facial recognition software there is having some trouble.

00:54:55.000 Anyway, they spend the rest of the episode, basically, talking about that joke and should they leave it in and the controversy it would cause.

00:55:03.000 And they both agree that in today's culture, you can't make stupid throwaway jokes without being pilloried, without being crucified.

00:55:11.000 So that's Ricky Gervais agreeing that PC culture is out of control.

00:55:16.000 Number four, Chris Rock.

00:55:19.000 He stopped playing colleges, and this is what he was talking to Seinfeld about.

00:55:22.000 Rich asked when Rock started to notice that, that colleges can't handle it.

00:55:26.000 College kids, he goes, probably a couple tours ago.

00:55:29.000 It was just like, this is not, and by the way, when you're transcribing someone in an interview, can you cut out some of the likes?

00:55:35.000 You make them sound like a fucking retard. 0.84

00:55:39.000 It was just like, this is not as much fun as it used to be.

00:55:42.000 I remember talking to George Carlin before he died and him saying the exact same thing.

00:55:46.000 So now we have Carlin included in this and Eddie Murphy, right?

00:55:52.000 If he quit with Solidarity for Brett Ratner.

00:55:54.000 So we're up, we're only at four, but we're up to more like six or seven.

00:55:57.000 All legends, by the way, that you lefties love, like Bill Maher.

00:56:02.000 That brings us to number five.

00:56:04.000 I don't know if you recall this, but Berkeley canceled his talk.

00:56:10.000 I can't remember if it went through, but there was massive protests trying to prevent him from talking at Berkeley because of Islamophobia.

00:56:18.000 Bill Maher, the liberal, is too intolerant.

00:56:22.000 And you know what the horrible thing that Bill Maher said?

00:56:25.000 After there was a bomb attack, he said, turns out the attacker was, oh, no, no, sorry.

00:56:29.000 This was the attack in Ottawa, Canada, where a Muslim stabbed, shot a man.

00:56:34.000 Remember the guy, Nathos, Corporal Cirrillo, I think his name was?

00:56:38.000 And he was guarding the tomb of the unknown soldier in a kilt, and a Muslim came up and shot him dead.

00:56:45.000 And Bill Maher said, turns out the attacker was Islamic.

00:56:48.000 What are the odds, huh?

00:56:49.000 It's almost like there's an elephant in the room.

00:56:52.000 How benign is that?

00:56:53.000 Comet.

00:56:54.000 No, that comedian must be banned. 0.99

00:56:57.000 And then, of course, our favorite example of this that Marin seems oblivious to is Shane Gillis.

00:57:03.000 Shane Gillis was canceled.

00:57:05.000 He, for what joke?

00:57:07.000 Okay, Mark, you're talking about punching down.

00:57:10.000 We just don't allow jokes that punch down and take advantage of the immense joy people feel when you denigrate Asians, for example.

00:57:18.000 Shane's joke, I've said it a million times, was how did Chinatowns begin?

00:57:22.000 Obviously a silly, kooky subject.

00:57:24.000 Yeah, they got these crazy buildings, and then people go, what the fuck?

00:57:27.000 Where did all these buildings come from?

00:57:28.000 Where did all these chinks come from? 1.00

00:57:31.000 People are like.

00:57:32.000 So they're creating a fictional character and he's saying silly stuff about Chinese people.

00:57:38.000 Again, if you want to really parse it down, you could show it that it's a parody of racism.

00:57:43.000 This guy was like, what are all these chinks doing here? 1.00

00:57:46.000 That's not a good guy.

00:57:46.000 That's not a real guy.

00:57:47.000 That's not someone people are holding up.

00:57:50.000 So in a sense, he's punching sideways, I guess, because he's talking about this.

00:57:54.000 Anyway, you're making me analyze comedy, which is like watching a woman put on lingerie. 0.99

00:57:58.000 You wreck it.

00:58:00.000 They're wrecking comedy.

00:58:01.000 Remember, Shane Gillis is the guy, by the way, who predicted this.

00:58:06.000 We talked about this on the show, wherein he plays a fireman who rescued a family but loses his job because he's a Trump supporter.

00:58:14.000 And the firehouse depicted in this sketch was shut down because the vice president of the firehouse was a Trump supporter.

00:58:22.000 Anyway, I've gone over that a million times.

00:58:24.000 Number seven, you'll notice I'm only using huge names so far.

00:58:27.000 Dave Chappelle.

00:58:30.000 Yeah, you shouldn't watch his special.

00:58:32.000 You can definitely skip Chappelle's new Netflix special, which I watched, and I would argue it's politically correct, meaning in the most literal sense of the word, it's politically safe.

00:58:43.000 But he says things like, I can't stop making fun of Trannies.

00:58:48.000 And then at the end, there's a QA, and he talks about a white woman that left one of his practice sets for the special at the Punchline Comedy Club in San Francisco.

00:58:57.000 And she says, as she's walking out, he goes, what's the problem?

00:59:00.000 And she goes, sorry, I was raped.

00:59:02.000 I guess he'd been making rape jokes.

00:59:03.000 And Chappelle says, he replied with, it's not your fault you were raped, which is very funny, right?

00:59:08.000 Because he wasn't saying sorry about that.

00:59:10.000 And then he goes, but it's not my fault either.

00:59:12.000 Ta-da, bitch. 1.00

00:59:14.000 Everyone laughed their heads off because it's possible to make a funny rape joke. 1.00

00:59:18.000 This means, though, however, go to the next link, that the Fox Business one, that the show should be skipped.

00:59:28.000 What is the headline again?

00:59:32.000 It's right after that one.

00:59:36.000 There was two links for Dave Chappelle.

00:59:36.000 Nope.

00:59:42.000 Chappelle's controversial special, Sticks and Stones, was a risky move for Netflix.

00:59:47.000 Ooh.

00:59:48.000 And then they go on to talk about Sarah Silverman, who is my next one.

00:59:51.000 Number eight, Sarah Silverman.

00:59:54.000 Wildly left-wing woman. 0.99

00:59:55.000 She wants Trump dead.

00:59:57.000 She hates his guts.

00:59:59.000 And she was fired recently from another job, a movie that might not have even have been a comedy.

01:00:05.000 She won't tell us.

01:00:06.000 But she was fired for wearing blackface in a sketch. 1.00

01:00:09.000 I guess this video is going to go through all the other people.

01:00:11.000 It used to be normal.

01:00:13.000 That's, what's his name?

01:00:14.000 Billy.

01:00:15.000 Well, there's Robert Downey Jr., but before that, that was Billy Crystal in Blackface.

01:00:19.000 But even more than the Billy Crystal in Blackface, when Sarah was wearing that, she was doing a parody of a totally ignorant bitch. 1.00

01:00:29.000 She couldn't have been more clearly mocking racism.

01:00:33.000 It was a sketch where she wanted to experience what black people go through, so she put on the most clownish makeup possible, and her character assumed that made her black.

01:00:43.000 It's lampooning blackface. 0.99

01:00:45.000 Why do I have to explain this?

01:00:47.000 The fact that a joke that simple has to be explained should show shitheads like Mark Maron that there is a war on comedy, and it's not saying just don't kick paraplegics in the head. 0.98

01:01:02.000 Which brings us to number nine.

01:01:04.000 You might not have heard of this guy if you're not Canadian, but he's pretty popular here too.

01:01:07.000 Mike Ward.

01:01:10.000 Is there a better example of the war on comedy than a comedian having to pay $42,000 for a joke?

01:01:19.000 The joke, by the way, was there was this kid, a Make a Wish Foundation, and he thought that that, isn't that, this is a joke, isn't that a thing you do right before you die?

01:01:27.000 It's like, my last wish before I die is I want to become Batman.

01:01:30.000 And then this, this guy didn't die.

01:01:33.000 What the fuck?

01:01:34.000 We wasted all that money?

01:01:36.000 What is he?

01:01:36.000 Unkillable?

01:01:37.000 That was his joke.

01:01:38.000 $42,000.

01:01:41.000 By the way, it's not just a good joke.

01:01:43.000 It's actually a good point.

01:01:46.000 We were all under the impression that it was a hopeless case.

01:01:48.000 If you're just sick, I'm not sure the whole town, remember in San Francisco, that guy got to be Batman for a day?

01:01:54.000 If he's just got a really, really bad disease that's going to be cured, like shingles or something, that's too much work.

01:02:03.000 It was like I got a big moving away party and then came right back.

01:02:07.000 Yeah.

01:02:07.000 It's terrible.

01:02:08.000 Yeah, we're not having a good, or it's like when someone gets married, you have a huge wedding, then they get divorced and a year later they have a new wedding in like Hawaii to the new girl and you go, yeah, I'm not going.

01:02:18.000 And I'm not buying you a gift.

01:02:21.000 Number 10, and this is very relevant, number 10, because I've only been doing super duper famous people up until now that are reiterating the unavoidable truth that there is a war on comedy.

01:02:34.000 But that's just to make my point to the people like Marin.

01:02:37.000 What I'm not including or I haven't included up to now is all the people you haven't heard of.

01:02:42.000 The thousands of comics and people in funny land who have been shat on and kicked out and rejected for trivial matters.

01:02:53.000 For example, you've never heard of Guy Earle?

01:02:57.000 He just paid $15,000 for a tirade of ugly words.

01:03:01.000 The National Post is a very PC paper, which is why they're talking like, did I just say peeper?

01:03:06.000 Paper.

01:03:08.000 The joke here for Guy Earl was this lesbian was heckling him and ruining his show. 1.00

01:03:14.000 It's kind of an understood thing in comedy that there's no holds barred for hecklers because they're ruining everyone's time.

01:03:22.000 So you can go after them.

01:03:24.000 And comedians do.

01:03:25.000 There's compilations all over YouTube of good zingers that comedians have done towards hecklers, but not in today's culture.

01:03:32.000 This guy said to this lesbian, you're not even really a lesbian. 1.00

01:03:36.000 It's just no guy will fuck you.

01:03:37.000 That's why you two are together.

01:03:39.000 This is after she was heckling.

01:03:40.000 Not the wittiest joke in the world, but it's a good go-to joke when ugly lesbians are bothering you. 1.00

01:03:45.000 She says she suffered PTSD from this now, was deeply traumatized.

01:03:49.000 And so he has to pay $15,000 to her to soothe her wounds.

01:03:57.000 I'm just remembering a bunch I haven't included here.

01:03:59.000 Like Gilbert Gottfried, remember him?

01:04:02.000 When he said, yeah, he said, is there a school around here in Japan during the horrible tsunami where buildings were floating down the street?

01:04:10.000 And he goes, no, there isn't, but if you stick around, there'll be one soon.

01:04:14.000 Hilarious.

01:04:15.000 Fired.

01:04:16.000 Then there was a funny one, Danny Baker.

01:04:18.000 I mean, I could go on forever.

01:04:19.000 These aren't included in my list.

01:04:21.000 Danny Baker was fired after showing this, Royal Baby Leaves the Hospital.

01:04:25.000 They assumed that he meant the baby was a monkey because the mother is part black.

01:04:30.000 It had never occurred to him.

01:04:32.000 But now, you see, they imbue racism.

01:04:34.000 They put it into your brain, even if you don't mean it.

01:04:37.000 I believe that Roseanne Barr is the same story.

01:04:39.000 I don't think she knew that Valerie Jarrett was black when she made that ape comment. 1.00

01:04:46.000 But finally, if you want the ultimate proof that there was a war on comedy, look at the people who thrive.

01:04:53.000 What's this chick's name again? 1.00

01:04:55.000 Anna something?

01:04:57.000 This is, so earlier, someone was complaining About woke culture ruining comedy.

01:05:03.000 And this woman said, trans woman, by the way, so a dude, a fat, ugly, stupid nerd with giant tits, said, no, no, no, there's nothing wrong.

01:05:12.000 In fact, I win all these awards every year for my amazing comedy.

01:05:16.000 Now, when I heard that, I thought, really?

01:05:18.000 I thought that all comedy these days is just Trump sucks, Trump sucks, Trump sucks.

01:05:23.000 Let's go check out this trans person who used affirmative action to get on stage and see if she belongs there. 1.00

01:05:32.000 We talked about this initially.

01:05:34.000 What was your name again?

01:05:35.000 Anna Carey?

01:05:37.000 Go back to the beginning, Ryan.

01:05:39.000 It says the name.

01:05:41.000 Amanda Carey's an even worse comedian. 1.00

01:05:43.000 Amanda Carey, yeah.

01:05:44.000 Why'd you go that far?

01:05:45.000 Go to her YouTube page where she had six subscribers.

01:05:51.000 Just pause.

01:05:51.000 This channel has been canceled now.

01:05:53.000 You can't find this video anymore because someone dared to go you suck and she can't handle it because she's not meant to be there.

01:06:01.000 That Donald Trump is not a human being is actually a computer program that randomly generates bigotry.

01:06:10.000 Just a really shitty bro.

01:06:12.000 Okay, that's enough.

01:06:14.000 That's what the war on comedy has wrought.

01:06:17.000 We've pushed the funny people out of the way and let fat, trans, ugly, lesbian nerds, whatever the fuck that thing was, take over the show and say Trump is a bigot. 0.93

01:06:27.000 He's a robot that randomly generates bigotry.

01:06:31.000 To end this discussion and this point, I would like to present Exhibit Numero Uno.

01:06:38.000 Here is bona fide truth that comedy is dead in America.

01:06:43.000 Rotten tomatoes rating is 100%.

01:06:48.000 100% shit.

01:06:52.000 100% shit.

01:07:04.000 Uh-oh, cops.

01:07:05.000 claps.

01:07:06.000 Um, do we, that's, Remember Blueshammer in the movie Ghost World?

01:07:22.000 Blueshammer.

01:07:23.000 I hate bluesy.

01:07:24.000 Oh, you like bluesy rock, probably.

01:07:26.000 It's, you know.

01:07:29.000 A little bit.

01:07:32.000 I get kind of bored with it quick, but if there's something awesome like John Bonamasa doing John Henry, I'm pretty sure that rules.

01:07:42.000 You found Blueshammer?

01:07:43.000 I don't believe these people.

01:07:48.000 He at least turned off their stupid sports game until he's done playing.

01:07:58.000 That's Steve Bassimi being Dan Klowes.

01:08:04.000 My daughter would love this movie.

01:08:05.000 Don't go away, we got Blues Hammer coming up in just a minute.

01:08:08.000 Hey, check that out.

01:08:10.000 You know, my daughter was kind of bummed this weekend because her friend was having a sleepover, but she didn't invite her.

01:08:16.000 And the reason was the friend hadn't seen this friend she grew up with in like a year or a long time, and they wanted just to be alone and have a sleepover together to rebond or something.

01:08:30.000 And so, you know, my wife was saying to my daughter, that's perfectly normal.

01:08:34.000 Don't be upset.

01:08:35.000 And then I took my daughter aside and I said, the two are not mutually exclusive.

01:08:44.000 Your friend can be reasonable and your being upset can be justified.

01:08:51.000 True.

01:08:52.000 Your feelings are valid.

01:08:55.000 So if you're pissed off, that's valid.

01:09:00.000 Like say your husband has to go away on a business trip and he's gone for 10 days and it's going to make you guys tons of money and it's good for his job, but you're stuck with the kids for 10 days.

01:09:10.000 That's valid that he's doing that.

01:09:12.000 And you could be pissed off that you got the fucking kids for 10 days all by yourself.

01:09:16.000 You can't do anything.

01:09:17.000 It's fair, but I don't like it.

01:09:20.000 Yeah.

01:09:20.000 So I said, because I don't want her to resent her feelings.

01:09:24.000 You know?

01:09:25.000 I don't want her to go, oh, I'm just being a stupid bitch.

01:09:27.000 No, you're not being a stupid bitch. 1.00

01:09:29.000 I'd be mad too.

01:09:30.000 You're allowed to feel.

01:09:32.000 Yeah.

01:09:33.000 You're having FOMO.

01:09:35.000 And FOMO is totally justified.

01:09:38.000 See, the thing about the liberals attacking me and doxing my kids is I want the show to talk about parenting more.

01:09:46.000 And I'd love to show videos of my kids and have them on the show and stuff, but I can't show their fucking faces or even say their names.

01:09:52.000 So that's actually a brilliant tactic by the left because they deperson you and they can say you're a Nazi and you can't defend yourself.

01:09:57.000 And then they also make your kids unsafe.

01:10:00.000 So now you can't show yourself, you can't humanize yourself by showing the world how much you love your kids.

01:10:06.000 Meanwhile, they have all the liberal hosts on Instagram going, here's my kids.

01:10:09.000 We're so happy.

01:10:10.000 I'm so normal.

01:10:14.000 Good trick, guys.

01:10:15.000 You're good at this sabotage shit.

01:10:17.000 And it even turned your pancakes into band cakes.

01:10:30.000 oh i get it Of course, this is Dan Clowes doing anti-white comedy where he's saying that we stole the blues from the black man.

01:10:48.000 But when I hear Led Zeppelin, I don't hear Blutengum's McGillicuddy.

01:10:53.000 I hear something that was an homage to the blues, but totally goes off in its own direction.

01:10:58.000 Anyway, I wanted to show this clip after my War on Comedy thing because sometimes I forget.

01:11:03.000 Andrew Breitbart was a friend of mine.

01:11:05.000 And sometimes I forget that he wasn't just interesting and fun to be around and comical.

01:11:10.000 There was something spooky about him.

01:11:13.000 Like he really, I'm sorry.

01:11:15.000 He really did feel like the Messiah.

01:11:17.000 I know I'm doing what the left does to Obama, but I scrap that analogy.

01:11:22.000 Of course he wasn't like Jesus Christ.

01:11:24.000 But there's some people, and it's very rare, very rare, and celebrities, nah, where you're around them and you're just like, this feels special.

01:11:35.000 like, when you're with a baby and their breath smells so good, and the top of their head smells so good, and you just think, This thing is magical.

01:11:43.000 And when you're with Andrew Breitbart, there's no like it's trivializing to say it's never boring, but that's all I can think of.

01:11:53.000 You just felt like I'm with a tour de force.

01:11:55.000 I'm with a legend.

01:11:58.000 I'm with the goat.

01:11:59.000 And I saw this clip late last night.

01:12:01.000 I couldn't sleep.

01:12:02.000 And it just reminded me how important the fight is and how special Andrew was.

01:12:08.000 And how when someone attacks something we love, like, what are you fucking doing?

01:12:13.000 Why did you do that?

01:12:18.000 Why did you do that?

01:12:19.000 Oh, it's a touch-sensitive keyboard, so just very lightly touch and then off to the races.

01:12:26.000 How important it is to fight this fight and win this fight and not let them destroy comedy, not let them destroy art, not let them destroy free speech, not let them destroy all of our freedoms, not let them destroy our country.

01:12:39.000 So when someone provokes you like that and says, I'm going to cancel you, the solution is not to cower.

01:12:45.000 The solution is to pick up your sword and to run into battle.

01:12:49.000 And sometimes it takes a legend like Andrew to remind you of that.

01:12:55.000 All the people that have gone out there against the mainstream media and said, you're going to call us racist, you're going to call us potential Timothy McVeighs.

01:13:05.000 Fuck you.

01:13:06.000 War.

01:13:10.000 War.

01:13:11.000 you you you you I have to see that again.

01:13:17.000 We're going out there against the mainstream media.

01:13:20.000 Full screen if we can.

01:13:21.000 Yeah, get rid of me.

01:13:22.000 All the people that have gone out there against the mainstream media and said, you're going to call us racist, you're going to call us potential Timothy McVays.

01:13:32.000 Fuck you.

01:13:37.000 War.

01:13:38.000 I'm out.

01:13:42.000 War.

01:13:44.000 That's what this is about.

01:13:45.000 It's not just the war on comedy.

01:13:47.000 As George Orwell said, within every joke is a tiny revolution.

01:13:51.000 This is about a war on Western values, a war on everything that defines us.

01:13:57.000 As Breitbart always said, politics is downstream from the culture.

01:14:01.000 And right now, they are attacking the culture.

01:14:04.000 Western culture.

01:14:06.000 Fun, stupidity, hilarity, Rotten Danger Field in Caddy Shack, junk food, being an asshole, being a douche, being ridiculous, being offensive, being dangerous.

01:14:21.000 They're going against all of those things in the name of being sensitive and not oppressing, not punching down.

01:14:27.000 That's a fucking lie.

01:14:30.000 This has nothing to do with protecting people.

01:14:32.000 This has 100% to do with power.

01:14:35.000 They want to control you.

01:14:37.000 They want to dominate you.

01:14:38.000 That's why they say, you have to say this, you have to do that, or you're unpersoned.

01:14:43.000 Well, the answer to that is no.

01:14:45.000 The answer to that is war. 0.95

01:14:50.000 Get fired.

01:14:51.000 Get in trouble.

01:14:52.000 Be brave.

01:14:53.000 And never stop fighting.

01:14:58.000 Jesus is waiting on.

01:15:02.000 Just as he always does.

Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - October 08, 2019

S02E69 - THE WAR ON COMEDY

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Transcript