Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - S04E53

00:00:46.000 And we're back.

00:00:46.000 The boys are back in town.

00:00:48.000 Ryan's back in town.

00:00:49.000 The show is back on the level.

00:00:51.000 We're ready to rock.

00:00:52.000 Welcome back, Ryan Catsu Rivera from your paternity leave.

00:00:57.000 Thank you.

00:00:58.000 I thought I threw that away.

00:01:00.000 You threw me across the room, but I found it.

00:01:03.000 You found it?

00:01:04.000 I thought you were it.

00:01:06.000 Oh, I found me.

00:01:08.000 I found me.

00:01:09.000 I found it.

00:01:10.000 Ryan did.

00:01:11.000 Oh, shit, I don't know how that.

00:01:12.000 Not the dinosaur.

00:01:13.000 I'll have to use a pencil today.

00:01:15.000 The reason I gave you paternity leave is because I think it sends a good message to the wife, which is I will be around.

00:01:22.000 Unlike my father, who abandoned me.

00:01:24.000 That's true.

00:01:25.000 He's on FaceTime.

00:01:27.000 He's a good granddad so far.

00:01:29.000 What?

00:01:30.000 He was on FaceTime.

00:01:31.000 We faced it.

00:01:32.000 No, that's not a good granddad.

00:01:33.000 A good granddad flies to New York City.

00:01:36.000 He will be in December.

00:01:39.000 So, yeah, I said, hey, you know, it's, you know, about this far from the city.

00:01:43.000 He's like, okay, that's not so bad.

00:01:46.000 We can do it.

00:01:48.000 And goes there.

00:01:49.000 He probably has some pussy in Manhattan.

00:01:52.000 Maybe.

00:01:52.000 That he used to fuck.

00:01:53.000 And he's just like...

00:01:54.000 I don't know if that's true.

00:01:55.000 I might as well go there, see my grandkid, I get my dick sucked.

00:01:59.000 I fuck Masiko.

00:02:01.000 Maybe I can cop some domes and see little babies.

00:02:06.000 I see the baby for, what, 10 minutes?

00:02:08.000 Then I get a good hotel.

00:02:10.000 I can tell my wife that I'm going there to see my grandson.

00:02:14.000 That could be my Adubar.

00:02:16.000 Okay.

00:02:17.000 Nothing wrong with that.

00:02:18.000 Walking's ass.

00:02:19.000 That's pretty cool.

00:02:22.000 Yeah, he must be dialed in with all the Japanese pussy, especially like 30, 40 year olds.

00:02:27.000 So in LA, it's a small community of Japanese people.

00:02:30.000 So they have like their own little community within LA.

00:02:34.000 And it's pretty...

00:02:36.000 Why are you always adjusting your microphone like that?

00:02:38.000 What is that little weird habit?

00:02:39.000 It slips a little bit.

00:02:40.000 Tighten it.

00:02:43.000 So he's got a little community.

00:02:44.000 I brought a girl there.

00:02:46.000 We went to sushi to eat sushi.

00:02:48.000 And then next to me was this girl there.

00:02:50.000 And we were chatting for a while.

00:02:51.000 Her English was terrible.

00:02:52.000 Japanese cute.

00:02:54.000 And he left.

00:02:55.000 He was like, I'll let you leave you alone.

00:02:56.000 Yeah, you take Upa side.

00:02:58.000 Yeah.

00:02:59.000 Just like me.

00:03:01.000 And then so he left, and then I'm chilling with her.

00:03:04.000 And then she comes over to hang out like a day later, two days later.

00:03:09.000 And at the time, it's only my grandmother on my dad's side.

00:03:12.000 So my dad's mom.

00:03:13.000 And she speaks no English whatsoever.

00:03:16.000 So she's in the apartment with me, just me and the girl.

00:03:20.000 And Baba, my grandmother, is walking around somewhere.

00:03:23.000 She's taking a walk.

00:03:24.000 Dad's not home.

00:03:25.000 He's working.

00:03:26.000 So it's just me and this girl in the apartment.

00:03:28.000 And I'm changing my shirt.

00:03:29.000 And so I have no shirt on.

00:03:30.000 I'm standing up.

00:03:31.000 And for some reason, I guess maybe it's very Japanese to like kneel.

00:03:34.000 So she's on her knees.

00:03:35.000 And I have no shirt on.

00:03:37.000 My grandmother walks in.

00:03:40.000 And I'm the only one who doesn't speak Japanese.

00:03:43.000 So I can't.

00:03:45.000 The Japanese girl's the only one who can explain what's going on.

00:03:48.000 So they're just talking to each other.

00:03:50.000 Yeah, pretty much.

00:03:52.000 Just like, I'm kneeling and he's changing and it's terrible.

00:03:56.000 And then my dad found out about it.

00:03:58.000 My grandmother ratted on me.

00:04:00.000 Thanks, Baba.

00:04:02.000 She's probably watching right now with Japanese subtitles.

00:04:05.000 Like this knitting.

00:04:06.000 She makes her own clothes.

00:04:07.000 Japanese people are weird, man.

00:04:09.000 She makes her own clothes.

00:04:10.000 Everything she wears, she makes her own own.

00:04:11.000 Including jeans.

00:04:12.000 She makes her own jeans.

00:04:13.000 Her own pants.

00:04:15.000 They're like a fabric pant, you know, like...

00:04:17.000 A fabric pant.

00:04:18.000 Okay.

00:04:19.000 Yeah.

00:04:19.000 That's what they call it in Japan.

00:04:21.000 Rough translation.

00:04:22.000 So my dad finds out about this.

00:04:24.000 He's like, Rayan, Japanese community is very small in LA.

00:04:29.000 So everybody's going to know.

00:04:30.000 So don't.

00:04:31.000 Don't fuck face.

00:04:32.000 Don't fuck face here.

00:04:34.000 He didn't like that I brought her over there.

00:04:37.000 But you never even fucked her.

00:04:39.000 No.

00:04:39.000 Did you ever make out with her?

00:04:40.000 We went to go see some samurai movie with Keanu Reeves or some shit, but we wound up just taking a hike and we didn't fuck now.

00:04:50.000 I don't know if Asian girls do.

00:04:52.000 She feels very cold.

00:04:54.000 It would basically be rape if I came onto her.

00:04:57.000 I think that's how they fuck.

00:04:58.000 I think a lot of cultures are just rape.

00:05:01.000 Yeah.

00:05:01.000 Like in Mexico, I think you just go out on a date with a girl and then you just take her home and rape her and you give her some money.

00:05:08.000 Like I had a Japanese girlfriend in New York City for a while and I would just rape her.

00:05:12.000 Maddie had a lot of Japanese girlfriends too.

00:05:14.000 No, he had one.

00:05:15.000 Oh.

00:05:16.000 Oh.

00:05:17.000 Faithful to him.

00:05:18.000 And I never said I had a lot.

00:05:19.000 But you would just rape them and they were like, oh, okay.

00:05:23.000 I don't have the heart to rape.

00:05:24.000 I know you told us yesterday to get raped and get, while the thanks for calling theme was playing a lot of times.

00:05:31.000 But I don't think I have the heart to rape.

00:05:33.000 Did we discuss that Ahmed Arbrey's lawyer is the Bald Eagle lawyer?

00:05:37.000 Yes, but we never showed the picture.

00:05:39.000 Well, I sent you the pic.

00:05:40.000 I saw this at the fucking pub.

00:05:42.000 Oh, my lord.

00:05:43.000 At the duck.

00:05:45.000 He's the guy.

00:05:46.000 He's the go-to guy for race hustles.

00:05:50.000 Oh, I got it.

00:05:51.000 He's the bird, which is the bald eagle lawyer.

00:05:54.000 You know what I is?

00:05:55.000 There he is on CNN discussing not the bird, which is the bald eagle, and he has a fucking eagle on his lapel.

00:06:04.000 Is that amazing or what?

00:06:05.000 The wolf, which is the blitzer.

00:06:09.000 By the way, if you're going to get an eagle on your lapel, try to keep it under two inches.

00:06:13.000 Jesus.

00:06:13.000 What the fuck is that thing?

00:06:15.000 An actual size.

00:06:16.000 Does it weigh a pound?

00:06:19.000 The lapel, which is the bald eagle, is way too fucking big, dude.

00:06:23.000 You look ridiculous.

00:06:24.000 You look ridiculous.

00:06:26.000 Look at that thing.

00:06:28.000 It looks like some sort of metal.

00:06:30.000 Right.

00:06:31.000 What a fucking weirdo he is.

00:06:34.000 I bet he's African.

00:06:35.000 I bet he's an African aristocrat.

00:06:38.000 He looks like he's...

00:06:39.000 His dad's Mugabe or something.

00:06:40.000 He's the son of Edi Amin.

00:06:42.000 He looks like he's an extra on that show Paw Paw, that Nigerian entertainment television comedy show.

00:06:48.000 I heard ESPN put out a documentary called Running with Ahmed.

00:06:54.000 They're going with the...

00:06:56.000 He was just going for a jog.

00:06:58.000 You know what you do when you go for a jog?

00:07:00.000 You go 10 miles from your house, then you put on your Timberland boots, and then you put on no shirt with your ski jacket, your winter coat.

00:07:09.000 You'll notice this in the New York Marathon.

00:07:11.000 It's what people do.

00:07:13.000 Oh, didn't the Rittenhouse guy wear the pin too?

00:07:16.000 A Millennium Falcon pin.

00:07:18.000 Yeah, no, let me expand on that, Ryan.

00:07:20.000 That's Binger.

00:07:21.000 We'll get to Rittenhouse.

00:07:22.000 We got a fun show today.

00:07:23.000 I'm going to start announcing what we're doing.

00:07:24.000 We got tons of Rittenhouse stuff.

00:07:26.000 We got some fun Microsoft James O'Keefe.

00:07:29.000 We got a ton of feminism shit.

00:07:31.000 No, not a ton, a little bit.

00:07:34.000 We got some, this guy diagnoses women with climate change.

00:07:38.000 We have a tiny bit of COVID.

00:07:40.000 Biden saying great Negro, a bunch of racism.

00:07:43.000 Asians don't exist anymore.

00:07:45.000 Hispanics are white.

00:07:47.000 And then, of course, the final video.

00:07:50.000 My head is pounding right now.

00:07:53.000 Very hungover from yesterday.

00:07:56.000 Started drinking at 4 and we went to 11.

00:07:59.000 It's not really how much you drink, it's the duration.

00:08:02.000 And I did seven hours yesterday, which is not great for a 51-year-old.

00:08:06.000 Slept until 11 a.m. today.

00:08:10.000 All right, let's start the show.

00:08:11.000 Should we start the show?

00:08:12.000 You ready to begin?

00:08:13.000 Yes.

00:08:15.000 You guys keep sending me sprinkles that are not sprinkles.

00:08:18.000 I don't think you understand the concept.

00:08:20.000 It's called fairy dust, right?

00:08:22.000 God comes up down from heaven, goes like this, like the space salt guy, and he sprinkles fairy dust on a very select group.

00:08:34.000 Maybe 5% of the population.

00:08:37.000 Of that 5%, 4% are male, 1% are female.

00:08:42.000 So when you see it, you know it.

00:08:44.000 It's like seeing a 10.

00:08:45.000 You don't see 10s.

00:08:48.000 You see a 10.

00:08:49.000 It's not a science.

00:08:51.000 It's an art.

00:08:52.000 But I would say five times a year?

00:08:55.000 About once every two months.

00:08:58.000 What do you think your baby's going to be at a 10 when she's 18?

00:09:03.000 Like 28 at least.

00:09:06.000 That'd be funny if you were like, I don't know, 6.1?

00:09:11.000 Do you have any more pics of her?

00:09:14.000 The little smiling Buddha?

00:09:15.000 Not following the what is she out of 10.

00:09:18.000 That's fair.

00:09:18.000 But no, I got a good one, actually.

00:09:20.000 Is Verifanes?

00:09:22.000 Are you going to teach her Japanese?

00:09:25.000 I don't know Japanese.

00:09:27.000 I know how to eat with chopsticks.

00:09:28.000 Are you going to teach her that?

00:09:30.000 This is her doing the okay symbol.

00:09:32.000 Oh, racist earth.

00:09:34.000 Well, no, she's doing it over the eye, so it's like Jay-Z or something.

00:09:38.000 That's funny.

00:09:43.000 My mother wants to knit her a hat.

00:09:46.000 And I said, just.

00:09:47.000 No, she did.

00:09:49.000 What?

00:09:49.000 An orange hat.

00:09:50.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:09:51.000 What are you talking about?

00:09:52.000 She already did.

00:09:54.000 My mother already knitted your baby hat.

00:09:56.000 Yeah, she gave me one.

00:09:57.000 Yeah, it's a little hat.

00:09:58.000 It's like it plumes out on top.

00:10:01.000 Yeah, yeah, I forgot.

00:10:02.000 We got to put that on her.

00:10:04.000 It might be a little too big right now.

00:10:05.000 Yeah, well, when she asked, she probably forgot.

00:10:07.000 She already gave one because she asked me about it.

00:10:09.000 I said, just knit a hat for a pencil, and that'll be about right.

00:10:14.000 A pencil topper will be good.

00:10:17.000 Okay, so here are some sprinkles.

00:10:18.000 This is what sprinkles look like, folks.

00:10:20.000 This is high-quality comedy.

00:10:22.000 This is what it looks like.

00:10:26.000 Must have their own house.

00:10:40.000 What are you doing?

00:10:41.000 Here are my presenters here.

00:10:44.000 Okay.

00:10:50.000 The only thing I teach about your cousin is his coffee.

00:10:54.000 You see how you do it?

00:10:56.000 Even the editing, like when he's going, you guys trying to, are you guys going to fuck?

00:11:00.000 What is this?

00:11:01.000 And then it cuts him off.

00:11:04.000 I'm her boyfriend.

00:11:05.000 Here are my present this year.

00:11:08.000 Okay.

00:11:15.000 That was clearly written by someone who doesn't have a sibling.

00:11:19.000 That's not how brothers and sisters talk to each other.

00:11:24.000 Oh, I found it.

00:11:26.000 Oh, yeah, that's what I meant to say that.

00:11:28.000 Not only does he have a Star Wars pin in that picture, the Millennial Falcon, Millennium?

00:11:34.000 Millennial?

00:11:35.000 I think.

00:11:35.000 Millennial Falcon.

00:11:36.000 Millennium.

00:11:36.000 Yeah, Millennial Falcon is like, I'll take a soy latte with my face.

00:11:40.000 Dude, he's had a different Star Wars pin on his lapel every day.

00:11:44.000 Oh.

00:11:45.000 You're at a murder trial.

00:11:47.000 Two men are dead, and you're deciding if you ruin someone's life because those two men are dead.

00:11:55.000 Stakes is high, as they say in the rap game.

00:11:58.000 Don't wear Star Wars pins.

00:12:00.000 And then we were like, well, when could you wear a Star Wars pin?

00:12:02.000 And we realized never.

00:12:03.000 If it's formal enough for a suit, it's too formal for a Star Wars pin.

00:12:09.000 Right.

00:12:09.000 If you went to Comic-Con with a suit, you're an idiot.

00:12:11.000 Right.

00:12:12.000 I mean, maybe now, maybe I could.

00:12:14.000 I'm doing a comedy news show.

00:12:16.000 Right.

00:12:16.000 Maybe I could.

00:12:18.000 But like the next day, it was the resistance.

00:12:20.000 The day after that, it was, I don't know, some Jedi flag.

00:12:24.000 He's a Jedi fag.

00:12:26.000 Oh, my God.

00:12:27.000 Did you notice the trend here?

00:12:30.000 Falcon?

00:12:32.000 Eagle.

00:12:33.000 Hmm.

00:12:34.000 Interesting trends.

00:12:35.000 And that's how you define a trend by two.

00:12:38.000 Yes.

00:12:40.000 This has been in my notes for a while now.

00:12:42.000 The left says they never.

00:12:43.000 Oh, yeah, this was on Bill Maher.

00:12:45.000 I've noticed this is a thing.

00:12:47.000 They talk about Q, like we're all Q people.

00:12:50.000 Ryan and I were discussing Q. There's a giant Q behind us.

00:12:54.000 Everything is Q Q Q. That's our mentor.

00:12:56.000 It goes like Trump, and then his concigliary is Q, And it all goes, we're all of the soldiers at the bottom of this mafia setup.

00:13:06.000 And you are saying you're watching this show, so you know that we don't know who the fuck Q is.

00:13:11.000 We don't know how to find Q. We spent like an hour digging him up.

00:13:15.000 And even when readers who are Q, readers, viewers, would send us, like, dudes, it's so simple.

00:13:22.000 You just go to 8chan and then you search QAnon and then you look up the newsletter.

00:13:28.000 And then you, and it was like, no, I'm not doing all that.

00:13:30.000 And that sounds really complicated.

00:13:32.000 So Q's not a thing.

00:13:34.000 There was a bunch of Q people, lunatics, obviously, who congregated in LA because there was going to be a second coming of Christ or something.

00:13:46.000 And all these people were coming back from the dead, including JFK.

00:13:50.000 Trust the plan.

00:13:52.000 Yeah, I heard about that.

00:13:54.000 And so the media is covering it like crazy because they like to make us look nuts.

00:13:59.000 But those people are very unusual.

00:14:01.000 They're like the kind of people who showed up to the Michael Jackson trial on his side defending him.

00:14:08.000 It's not a thing.

00:14:10.000 Will Summer, that little dwarf with the ugly wife that I attacked at Roger Stone's trial, he's doing a book on QAnon right now.

00:14:20.000 So we can all learn about a handful of lunatics.

00:14:26.000 It's like doing a book on Charlottesville.

00:14:30.000 Yeah.

00:14:33.000 Sophia Ankel.

00:14:34.000 Good work, Sophia.

00:14:36.000 Was JFK Jr. even that cool?

00:14:39.000 Or just the fact that he's coming back from the dead is awesome?

00:14:42.000 Yeah, I don't know.

00:14:42.000 If anybody came back from the dead, it'd be a good idea.

00:14:44.000 He was very political, but I think he was a lefty.

00:14:47.000 Yeah, that magazine, right?

00:14:48.000 George magazine.

00:14:53.000 QAnon.

00:14:54.000 You're doing a book on QAnon.

00:14:55.000 Just the plan.

00:14:56.000 What a total and utter waste of time.

00:14:58.000 You fucking loser.

00:15:00.000 Will Summer, you're a loser.

00:15:04.000 Speaking of losers, this is ancient news by now, but Microsoft, I guess this is political correctness for blind people.

00:15:11.000 They describe themselves now.

00:15:13.000 I'm sorry to drag out.

00:15:14.000 This is like three days old, but we've been away and Ryan was indulging himself in his baby time.

00:15:20.000 They say, hi, I'm Gavin McInnes.

00:15:23.000 I'm male, white male.

00:15:24.000 I use the pronouns he, him.

00:15:26.000 And I'm wearing a vintage suit from the 50s from Alexander Shields.

00:15:34.000 Brooks Brothers tie.

00:15:36.000 And I look like Donald Sutherland with AIDS.

00:15:41.000 Look at this shit.

00:15:44.000 It's like they're trying to outdo the cringe of Facebook.

00:15:48.000 Hi, before we start, I'm Tyler.

00:15:50.000 I'm a half bisexual.

00:15:52.000 What the fuck?

00:15:53.000 Half.

00:15:55.000 I'm the straight half of bisexual.

00:15:58.000 I'm a half bisexual?

00:16:01.000 What the fuck?

00:16:03.000 So a quarter sexual?

00:16:04.000 Are you an amputee?

00:16:07.000 What the fuck is a half bisexual?

00:16:10.000 I'm a half bisexual.

00:16:11.000 When I fuck guys, it's only with the lower half of me.

00:16:13.000 I don't touch them.

00:16:14.000 It's probably like I'm straight, but I appreciate male beauty or something.

00:16:17.000 I'd never fuck them, but I'm like, I can accept that Liam Neeson is an attractive man.

00:16:22.000 I guess we're all half bisexual.

00:16:24.000 I'm a half-bisexual straight male with a PlayStation t-shirt and blue pants.

00:16:29.000 I use he, him pronouns, and you.

00:16:31.000 But wait a minute.

00:16:32.000 If you're blind, right, you don't identify people by how they look because you've never looked.

00:16:39.000 So why would you say blue pants to someone who's never seen blue pants?

00:16:43.000 Who are you talking to?

00:16:45.000 Who does it help to say I have blue pants on?

00:16:49.000 Help me here.

00:16:52.000 Okay, thanks for the information.

00:16:53.000 I am KO'd, a male.

00:16:55.000 You can use he pronouns for me also.

00:16:58.000 You know who else uses he, him pronouns?

00:17:00.000 50% of the population.

00:17:02.000 You know who uses she, her pronouns?

00:17:04.000 50% of the population.

00:17:07.000 Now, there's a statistical irrelevance there, which is like 100 people.

00:17:12.000 And they use like Z, Zer, demonic pronouns, all that shit.

00:17:16.000 Just ignore them.

00:17:17.000 They don't exist.

00:17:18.000 They're statistically irrelevant.

00:17:20.000 That's what the left has become.

00:17:22.000 Statistically irrelevant.

00:17:24.000 If you're half bisexual, you don't exist.

00:17:27.000 Oh, you want me not to exist?

00:17:29.000 I don't want you.

00:17:31.000 You don't exist.

00:17:32.000 Just know.

00:17:33.000 Oh, you want me to die?

00:17:35.000 You need to matter to die.

00:17:38.000 You're not a thing.

00:17:40.000 Hey, people with weird pronouns.

00:17:42.000 You literally don't exist.

00:17:46.000 And lots in store for you.

00:17:48.000 First, we want to acknowledge that.

00:17:50.000 I'm the funny little semi-Asian woman wearing a boring shirt I got from Target.

00:17:55.000 I'm the most attractive extra in Apocalypto.

00:17:59.000 We want to acknowledge that the land where the Microsoft campus is situated was traditionally occupied by the Sammamish.

00:18:06.000 Never heard them.

00:18:07.000 The Duwamish.

00:18:07.000 Never heard them.

00:18:08.000 The Snoqualmie.

00:18:09.000 Nope.

00:18:09.000 The Suquamish.

00:18:10.000 What?

00:18:11.000 The Muckle Shoot?

00:18:12.000 What?

00:18:12.000 The Snoquame.

00:18:13.000 They can't just make up tribes.

00:18:15.000 I want to acknowledge that Get Off My Lawn is filmed on Muckle Shoot land.

00:18:20.000 We're trying to give it back to them because we bought the property and we want the Muckle Shoot to happen again.

00:18:25.000 Unfortunately, the Muckle Shoot have not existed for 700 years.

00:18:30.000 Muckle Chute?

00:18:31.000 Look that up.

00:18:33.000 Muckle Shoe?

00:18:34.000 What the fuck?

00:18:35.000 I thought I knew about tribes.

00:18:37.000 I married one.

00:18:38.000 I married a ho-chunk.

00:18:40.000 What are the muckle chute?

00:18:42.000 I think they're like not as good as Gryffindor, but better than Slytherin.

00:18:46.000 And definitely the same thing.

00:18:47.000 I'll bet you $100.

00:18:49.000 No Indians have heard of the Muckle Shoot.

00:18:51.000 They wear bandanas.

00:18:53.000 Let's try.

00:18:55.000 Let's call an Indian right now.

00:18:56.000 I'll call my wife.

00:18:58.000 Muckle shoot.

00:19:00.000 You ready?

00:19:00.000 Are they white?

00:19:04.000 Oh, muggles, because they're muggles?

00:19:06.000 I think it's Emily.

00:19:09.000 She's not there.

00:19:10.000 Muckle shoot?

00:19:14.000 They deserve to have their land stolen for having such a stupid name.

00:19:20.000 Also, in the fun little intro news bites, James O'Keefe, who I'm telling you, man, I might even leave my mega dad chat after this one dude said, fuck him.

00:19:32.000 He said, fuck that man child.

00:19:34.000 He's irrelevant.

00:19:36.000 what?

00:19:37.000 James O'Keefe?

00:19:39.000 And then he says to our dad chat, what has he ever done?

00:19:43.000 So every dad is like, just bombards him with examples from Acorn to the New York Times.

00:19:49.000 And he's like, yeah, besides that, I don't know.

00:19:51.000 What have you ever done?

00:19:53.000 Anyway, he's suing the New York Times.

00:19:57.000 And one of the things he's suing them for is targeted harassment.

00:20:01.000 And there was a map that they put out of conservatives.

00:20:05.000 And the map used bullseyes for, I don't know, our location, James's location, all these different headquarters of conservatives.

00:20:16.000 Look at the way he's dressed.

00:20:18.000 Marxists dress like they're in jail.

00:20:23.000 So James points out, he goes, wait a minute, you guys put up these maps of conservatives that have bullseyes on them.

00:20:30.000 And at the same time, you complain about maps that show, say, Planned Parenthood places and they have targets on them.

00:20:37.000 So you can't have it both ways.

00:20:39.000 You can't complain about targets and then make me a target.

00:20:42.000 So he confronts the guy that did this.

00:20:45.000 And the guy denied that he ever put bullseyes on anyone.

00:20:50.000 It's bullshit.

00:20:51.000 You were sued for defamation.

00:20:52.000 You were the op-ed page for the New York Times.

00:20:55.000 You're on video admitting that you made an admission of a false claim.

00:20:59.000 We did a very poor job.

00:21:02.000 I did.

00:21:05.000 See this?

00:21:05.000 And I'm ultimately responsible for the journalism that we produce.

00:21:08.000 Do you know what this is?

00:21:09.000 It's a bullseye.

00:21:10.000 I'm getting it.

00:21:11.000 Under oath, you denied that this was a target.

00:21:14.000 Do you consider this map to be political incitement?

00:21:16.000 I just think it's using violent imagery.

00:21:19.000 I read those as gun sites.

00:21:21.000 Do you consider that to be political incitement?

00:21:23.000 Those don't look like gun sites to me.

00:21:25.000 What do you consider the symbols on the map in Exhibit 217 to be?

00:21:29.000 I don't know what they're meant to represent.

00:21:31.000 Do they look like bullseyes?

00:21:33.000 No, now that you say that, yeah, I could see that.

00:21:36.000 What are bullseyes used for?

00:21:37.000 Targeting.

00:21:38.000 Target practice.

00:21:40.000 With weapons?

00:21:42.000 Yeah.

00:21:43.000 Do you have any advice for other people being deposed to the New York Times so they don't look like fools?

00:21:50.000 James is finally embracing humor.

00:21:53.000 Wow.

00:21:54.000 And that's a crucial thing.

00:21:56.000 To call him a manchild is weird too, because isn't he like the largest human being that ever existed?

00:22:00.000 Yeah.

00:22:01.000 Well, I wouldn't quite put it that way.

00:22:03.000 He's not under the giant, but he's probably 6'4.

00:22:05.000 I remember you saying I was at your house and you were like, he couldn't fit in this room.

00:22:10.000 If we were eating dinner, he would be outside on the porch and we'd have to shovel food like through the door.

00:22:15.000 I was exaggerating.

00:22:17.000 He's not quite that large.

00:22:18.000 Okay.

00:22:19.000 But he's a big boy.

00:22:20.000 Yeah, he looks grande.

00:22:22.000 He had a great life story.

00:22:24.000 I'm going to interview him here in the studio and do a big long sit-down because one of the most interesting things about him is his shitty childhood.

00:22:30.000 His dad decided to like turn a barn into their home and it was decrepit.

00:22:36.000 So he basically built a house from scratch.

00:22:39.000 And James's entire childhood was lifting 2x4s and drywall and soldering electricity and gluing plumbing together.

00:22:50.000 What do you call them?

00:22:52.000 CVS pipes, QVC pipes.

00:22:54.000 PVC.

00:22:54.000 PVC pipes.

00:22:55.000 That's his whole childhood.

00:22:57.000 So as people try to destroy him and dismantle everything he's done, he's very used to building back.

00:23:03.000 In fact, that stupid barn that his dad built from scratch burned down.

00:23:07.000 And they built it again.

00:23:09.000 Him, his dad, and his grandfather.

00:23:11.000 What a great lesson.

00:23:14.000 And I'm the bad guy for having screen-free Mondays.

00:23:19.000 This is a hit piece, but they're using...

00:23:21.000 He went undercover with a mustache, which is pretty funny.

00:23:25.000 That's a good mustache.

00:23:26.000 Pretty fucking good.

00:23:27.000 We got to get a prosthetics guy.

00:23:28.000 So that way, if we want to look old, like the jackass guys, like have old face and go around and so we're going to have someone full-time just sitting here with latex in a call spending eight hours?

00:23:40.000 Well, that's my plan to escape from prison.

00:23:42.000 Oh, yeah.

00:23:43.000 I get prosthetics.

00:23:45.000 I become John Kinsman, and then he leaves and I go back to his cell.

00:23:48.000 And you have to practice changing.

00:23:51.000 Like, practice it, like, try to get your time down.

00:23:54.000 Yeah, yeah.

00:23:55.000 You know what I mean?

00:23:56.000 Best movie ever.

00:23:57.000 Russell Crowe 2.5 Miles or something it's called.

00:24:03.000 My favorite type of movie is a guy like you and me doing something extraordinary.

00:24:11.000 I don't want to see Captain America beat the shit out of a horse.

00:24:15.000 I know you can.

00:24:16.000 Three days.

00:24:17.000 I want to see me beat up a horse.

00:24:19.000 It's hard.

00:24:20.000 Is this it?

00:24:21.000 Next three days?

00:24:24.000 Yes, I think.

00:24:28.000 I want to do a movie like this where I, because I did an article about the Clinton death count, and it took me like three days of research, and I was scared at the end.

00:24:38.000 Wait, play this?

00:24:39.000 Smile.

00:24:40.000 I like how this is by HD TV News, and it's the least HD 480p fucking HD, where everything is soft definition.

00:24:52.000 I got it.

00:24:52.000 Pixels are overrated at HD TV.

00:24:58.000 Hardly deaf TV.

00:25:04.000 Forget that Laura's your wife.

00:25:06.000 Look at the evidence.

00:25:14.000 Max and John.

00:25:16.000 So he dresses up like her?

00:25:18.000 That would be hilarious.

00:25:19.000 Hi.

00:25:21.000 And then he ends up loving it there because he just fucks everyone.

00:25:24.000 And they go, your time's up, ma'am.

00:25:26.000 He's like, oh, I'm going to punch you in the face, bitch.

00:25:29.000 You just bought yourself another month.

00:25:31.000 Oh, no.

00:25:31.000 Oh, fuck.

00:25:32.000 What are you going to do about it?

00:25:36.000 We joke, but that's happening.

00:25:37.000 Like, the tranny, Eric, the Jew, Antifa, who stabbed that guy, is trying to get into a female prison.

00:25:43.000 Oh, yeah.

00:25:44.000 Ask yourself, can you kill a god?

00:25:48.000 Because to do this thing, that's who you have to become.

00:25:51.000 And if you can't, don't stop.

00:25:53.000 Shit, he's taken under his wing.

00:25:57.000 See, look, he's beaten up.

00:25:59.000 Because he realizes to figure out how to break out of prison, he has to hang out with criminals.

00:26:03.000 You can't just hang out with criminals.

00:26:05.000 So, as he's trying to get to know criminals, they suss him out and they beat the shit out of him, but he keeps going.

00:26:12.000 So good.

00:26:13.000 Of course, that chick is ruined from that hum, hum, hum, a dum, beam, bum, bum, bum.

00:26:20.000 Like a big plane on a mountain, on a wrinkle wave, on a sandboard.

00:26:28.000 Never sandboard.

00:26:29.000 I don't quite remember the words.

00:26:31.000 A sandboard, yes.

00:26:33.000 A wrinkle wave.

00:26:33.000 A sandboard tribe.

00:26:36.000 I can make an explosion.

00:26:40.000 They were so confident they were going to win that they were already gloating.

00:26:45.000 Eric Gloat.

00:26:48.000 This is for Hillary.

00:26:49.000 That's for Hillary.

00:26:51.000 Stay in prison, bitch.

00:26:53.000 Yeah.

00:26:53.000 I was going to break you out of prison until I saw this.

00:26:56.000 I'm so hot.

00:26:57.000 On the ocean.

00:27:04.000 She acts like I'm jerking off to her.

00:27:07.000 And she's a fan.

00:27:13.000 This is actors without a director.

00:27:15.000 The director would be going, a little smaller, guys.

00:27:17.000 A little smaller.

00:27:18.000 Calm the fuck down.

00:27:30.000 At least Asians have no soul, so they can't overact.

00:27:32.000 They just programmed her to do that.

00:27:36.000 God, they always, like, lefties always just looks just a little off, like gaunt in the face or something.

00:27:43.000 They're just vapid.

00:27:44.000 Their teeth are too weak.

00:27:45.000 It's actors, too.

00:27:46.000 Like, Kumia points this out.

00:27:47.000 He goes, the way you're a good actor is, I used to know her.

00:27:52.000 You just have to have an empty vessel so the director and the writer can pour in whatever little brew they've concocted.

00:27:58.000 You can't have a personality.

00:28:00.000 That was from Louis C.K. had said that on the show.

00:28:02.000 He was like, the best actor is just an empty coffee mug.

00:28:07.000 Yeah.

00:28:08.000 Who the fuck is that guy with the hat?

00:28:12.000 Oh, Jesus.

00:28:14.000 Anyway.

00:28:16.000 All right, let's start the show for real now.

00:28:17.000 We're actually getting down to brass tacks.

00:28:19.000 Are you ready, Ryan?

00:28:20.000 I'm ready.

00:28:21.000 Let's do this.

00:28:22.000 Let's do it.

00:28:22.000 Rittenhouse.

00:28:25.000 We've won, right?

00:28:26.000 Can we start celebrating yet?

00:28:29.000 Free speech, the Second Amendment, self-defense, MAGA.

00:28:33.000 We won.

00:28:34.000 Deshante Rittenhouse, if he was black and his victims were MAGA, we wouldn't have a trial.

00:28:39.000 But I think that picture sums it up, right?

00:28:41.000 Look at those fucking clowns, the prosecution.

00:28:44.000 I've just been tuning in, and every time I tune in, the judge is like, what the fuck?

00:28:50.000 Stop.

00:28:51.000 You're right on the edge.

00:28:52.000 Yeah.

00:28:52.000 He said.

00:28:53.000 He's like, this isn't permitted.

00:28:56.000 This has been a law for 40 years.

00:28:58.000 He said, you started pissing me off when you chastised Kyle for his silence after.

00:29:04.000 Yes.

00:29:04.000 Like, he's supposed to go on what?

00:29:06.000 A talk radio tour?

00:29:09.000 No, you're not.

00:29:10.000 Shut your mouth.

00:29:11.000 Now, putting him on the stand was crazy.

00:29:13.000 Yeah.

00:29:15.000 That was like playing blackjack and you're at 16 and you say, hit me.

00:29:19.000 Okay.

00:29:20.000 But I think they got a four.

00:29:22.000 And I said something.

00:29:23.000 I whispered him.

00:29:25.000 Court, you better get permission.

00:29:27.000 This is ridiculous.

00:29:30.000 It wasn't excluded, John.

00:29:31.000 You know why it was excluded in the first place?

00:29:33.000 Because it was propensity evidence.

00:29:36.000 That is exactly what 90404 is designed to prevent.

00:29:41.000 You're talking about his attitudes.

00:29:44.000 His attitude is he wants to shoot people.

00:29:47.000 Now, I've admitted that kind of evidence in other trials when it's been appropriate.

00:29:52.000 I didn't admit it in this case because to me, what I've heard in this trial, and by the way, Mr. Richards absolutely correctly points out that just hours ago, I said I had heard nothing in this trial to change any of my rulings.

00:30:05.000 So why?

00:30:06.000 Testimony on.

00:30:07.000 Pardon me?

00:30:08.000 That was before the king's testimony.

00:30:12.000 You knew very well.

00:30:14.000 You know what I'm saying?

00:30:16.000 See what's going on here?

00:30:17.000 That judge has bad adrenaline control.

00:30:19.000 He's mad and it's fucking up his speech.

00:30:21.000 Yeah, yeah.

00:30:22.000 He's trying to, like, let me know.

00:30:24.000 He's so mad that he's stuttering.

00:30:26.000 Just fucking have a shot, dude.

00:30:30.000 Is that a real picture where he's looking at the cookie magazine?

00:30:33.000 Yes.

00:30:34.000 This guy rules.

00:30:35.000 It's also real that his go to 1-7, his ringtone is proud to be an American.

00:30:41.000 Sure is.

00:30:41.000 Which people are saying is evidence of bias.

00:30:44.000 That's the America we're living in today.

00:30:46.000 Standing your ground is aggressive, and being proud to be an American is biased.

00:30:51.000 Yeah, did he put all those American flags in the court, too?

00:30:53.000 Is that his decision?

00:30:56.000 The actions that I had talked about were done in bad faith.

00:31:04.000 That I think...

00:31:05.000 The fact that it's like trumpets, like the most extravagant fanfare.

00:31:10.000 Turning off, though.

00:31:11.000 Fucking boomers and their cell phones.

00:31:14.000 Turn off...

00:31:15.000 Hey, everyone over 58, turn off your motherfucking ringtone right now.

00:31:22.000 You know what my ringtone is?

00:31:23.000 You know what I have on my phone for my ringtone?

00:31:26.000 I don't know.

00:31:27.000 I've never heard my phone ring ever.

00:31:30.000 Ever.

00:31:31.000 If it vibrates, I'll feel it on my ass.

00:31:34.000 Otherwise, I check my phone occasionally to see if anyone's, and no one calls me.

00:31:38.000 People text me.

00:31:39.000 That's right.

00:31:39.000 You're a boomer of the future.

00:31:40.000 Your keys will ring and your wallet will ring.

00:31:44.000 Phone?

00:31:46.000 Well, you know Shaquille O'Neal.

00:31:49.000 You know how you contact him?

00:31:51.000 How?

00:31:52.000 You send out vibes and he senses that you want to contact him.

00:31:57.000 I don't believe it.

00:31:57.000 And then he picks up his phone and it rings.

00:32:02.000 I saw that in an interview once.

00:32:05.000 He just feels it.

00:32:06.000 I want to believe that.

00:32:07.000 Okay, wait a minute.

00:32:08.000 Let me try it.

00:32:09.000 Shaquille O'Neal.

00:32:10.000 Shaquille O'Neal, I want to talk to you.

00:32:12.000 I think you're a big giant idiot who believes in some sort of fifth-dimensional energy that shoots out through the cosmos.

00:32:22.000 Can you call me back?

00:32:24.000 I'm leaving a fifth-dimension message.

00:32:28.000 Oh, he's on Skype.

00:32:30.000 Oh.

00:32:30.000 Hi, Shaq.

00:32:31.000 It worked.

00:32:32.000 I apologize.

00:32:32.000 He's saying he can't hear us.

00:32:33.000 The audio's.

00:32:34.000 Hello?

00:32:35.000 I can't hear you.

00:32:37.000 I can't hear you.

00:32:38.000 Who's that guy?

00:32:40.000 Maybe this is a tech guy?

00:32:42.000 That guy is a deathly serious dude with no sense of humor who talks about music like it's astrophysics.

00:32:51.000 Oh, he's using a phone.

00:32:53.000 Why couldn't he use his vibes?

00:32:55.000 How are you?

00:32:55.000 Hey, Shaq.

00:32:56.000 How are you?

00:33:01.000 They need a new sign.

00:33:04.000 You can just reach it and pull it down, Shaq.

00:33:07.000 Yeah.

00:33:07.000 Do that.

00:33:08.000 Pull it down and fix it.

00:33:09.000 It sucks.

00:33:11.000 The graffiti behind you is better than their sign.

00:33:14.000 Shaq gives back, but their sign still sucks.

00:33:16.000 All right.

00:33:20.000 Clueless Fantano, our favorite guy to shit on these days, Tony Fontano, the toughest name on the weakest person in America.

00:33:30.000 I got to admit, it was compelling when Rittenhouse's lawyers argued bringing an illegal weapon, nope, to a protest.

00:33:38.000 See, that already pisses me off.

00:33:40.000 Proud Boy's gotten shit for this for bringing weapons to Texas.

00:33:43.000 We talked about that last night.

00:33:46.000 Americans are naive.

00:33:47.000 We are naive as a people.

00:33:49.000 And we don't understand that when you're going to a riot or even a fucking natural disaster like Katrina, you need to be armed.

00:34:00.000 Because when there's no laws and no police and it's a state of total chaos, there's violent assholes that want to hurt you.

00:34:08.000 And isn't it funny how they're making it sound nuts that he brought an illegal weapon to a protest when three people tried to kill him?

00:34:18.000 Like, if he wasn't armed, he'd be dead.

00:34:22.000 What about that part?

00:34:23.000 Isn't that relevant?

00:34:24.000 Isn't the fact that three people were trying to kill him proof that he was correct to bring a gun?

00:34:31.000 What's this guy got going on?

00:34:33.000 Is he fat?

00:34:34.000 He's fucking weird fat.

00:34:36.000 I hate that kind of fat when your head is normal.

00:34:38.000 It's weird fat, dude.

00:34:39.000 It's sit on your ass all day fat.

00:34:41.000 Dog fucker fat.

00:34:42.000 That's his wife.

00:34:42.000 He's got a Brett Gelman going on.

00:34:44.000 Oh.

00:34:45.000 Black wife.

00:34:45.000 Get out of jail free card.

00:34:47.000 You ever seen him with Nardoir?

00:34:49.000 What's next?

00:34:49.000 Next, once you get a black wife, the next stage is to shit on white women constantly.

00:34:54.000 That's all Bill Burr talks about is fucking white women.

00:34:57.000 Ah, dude.

00:34:58.000 How horrible they are.

00:34:59.000 Dude, they're so fucking white, you know?

00:35:02.000 Meanwhile, she married him to get away from blackness, and she wants nothing to do with it.

00:35:05.000 And he wants her to get back to blackness.

00:35:08.000 He's like, can you say Uhuru and shit and fucking grow your hair?

00:35:11.000 And she's like, no.

00:35:12.000 I like watching The Office.

00:35:14.000 And he's like, no, watch The Black Panthers.

00:35:16.000 I married a ginger.

00:35:18.000 It's you.

00:35:20.000 Look at this guy.

00:35:21.000 Oh, wait, you already see it.

00:35:24.000 He's got the weird long tits.

00:35:26.000 Ew.

00:35:27.000 Yeah.

00:35:28.000 Not only should a man not have tits, but if you are going to have tits, at least have good tits.

00:35:33.000 You just got shitty tits.

00:35:35.000 Hey, shitty tits.

00:35:36.000 Let's call him that from now on.

00:35:37.000 Shitty tits.

00:35:38.000 That might be the name of today's episode.

00:35:40.000 Man, Sam Hyde really did him a favor by not mentioning his body.

00:35:44.000 Yeah.

00:35:45.000 You took it easy.

00:35:46.000 Let me hear some of this interview.

00:35:48.000 Good friend Cal.

00:35:50.000 Coven, the movie, was produced by someone who's in a film that I love called American Movie, which is kind of where I got the accent that Cal, or where Cal must have gotten.

00:36:05.000 Who is Cal for the people that don't know?

00:36:06.000 Cal is my roommate who appears in numerous videos.

00:36:10.000 And he was basically kind of modeled after a lot of the accents that I was hearing.

00:36:16.000 What did I do?

00:36:16.000 Which is kind of a great documentary film, sort of funny, very personal about the whole process of making the movie.

00:36:24.000 And it's good that you bring that up because a lot of people think Cal's from Canada.

00:36:27.000 And that's just not the case.

00:36:29.000 I don't know where he's from personally, but I'm pretty sure.

00:36:32.000 God, I hate that guy.

00:36:34.000 So we finished his...

00:36:36.000 Oh, yeah, sorry.

00:36:37.000 To a protest, anticipating there will be cause for him to use it on his ideological opponents.

00:36:42.000 What?

00:36:43.000 Anticipating there will be cause.

00:36:45.000 See, this is what I want to talk about.

00:36:47.000 All these assumptions about Kyle bringing a weapon.

00:36:50.000 You know why he brought a weapon?

00:36:52.000 Because there's murderers there.

00:36:53.000 The three people he shot.

00:36:56.000 One of them is a serial domestic abuser who would beat the shit out of his girlfriends.

00:37:01.000 That guy's dead, thank God.

00:37:03.000 Rosenbaum wasn't just a pedophile.

00:37:06.000 This isn't just a Joe Biden sniffer.

00:37:09.000 He was a child rapist.

00:37:12.000 He fucked underage boys in their assholes.

00:37:17.000 Worse than Michael Jackson, Rosenbaum.

00:37:20.000 He's dead and a psychotic lunatic who I think spent 10 years in prison.

00:37:25.000 And then there was Gage Gershkowitz, who beat the shit out of his mother, got kicked out of the house.

00:37:31.000 His grandmother took him in.

00:37:33.000 He beat the shit out of her.

00:37:35.000 Those are the kind of people, these are not ideological opponents, okay?

00:37:40.000 These are psychopaths.

00:37:42.000 These are human garbage.

00:37:46.000 And he brought a gun because psychopaths will try to kill you, which they did.

00:37:51.000 They hit him with the skateboard and then Gage had his fucking six gauge, whatever it's called, and was pointing it about to shoot fucking Kyle dead.

00:38:03.000 And the left wants Kyle dead and those other guys to thrive.

00:38:08.000 They love miscreants.

00:38:09.000 Didn't Rosenbaum just get out of prison for a 15-year stint?

00:38:13.000 He had his jailbag on him still.

00:38:15.000 Really?

00:38:15.000 Yes.

00:38:16.000 Well, all night he was like, kill me, motherfucker, kill me.

00:38:19.000 Okay.

00:38:19.000 He's the N-word.

00:38:20.000 Coming up, you rapist dwarf.

00:38:28.000 Go to, well, let's just go in order.

00:38:30.000 Go to 19.

00:38:32.000 This fucking clown who was prosecuting him.

00:38:34.000 I feel bad for John Pierce.

00:38:36.000 John Pierce was Kyle Rittenhouse's original lawyer.

00:38:38.000 He raised $2 million for him.

00:38:40.000 I don't know what happened with those two guys.

00:38:42.000 I know Kyle Rittenhouse.

00:38:43.000 I've spoken to him on the phone, and I know John Pierce.

00:38:45.000 No one will tell me exactly what happened, but for whatever reason, he stopped being his lawyer.

00:38:51.000 And then these guys get the glory.

00:38:53.000 It must suck to watch an incompetent prosecutor be so easily defeated.

00:38:58.000 And you were the lawyer.

00:39:00.000 It could have been those dudes going like this.

00:39:04.000 But fucking Tommy Lee Jones got it.

00:39:06.000 But you see what's behind him?

00:39:08.000 So behind his right ear, there's Star Wars action figures.

00:39:14.000 And behind his left ear is a children's version, a children's book, an illustrated version of Die Hard, the movie.

00:39:24.000 That's what's behind his fucking stupid, shitty head.

00:39:29.000 This is a perfect case for him, though, not going to lie, because his whole life he's been trying to figure out who shot first.

00:39:35.000 Was it Greedo or Han?

00:39:37.000 So this is a very similar situation going on.

00:39:40.000 Yeah, yeah.

00:39:41.000 That's his research.

00:39:42.000 Well, if you see here in item number, that's Star Wars 4.

00:39:46.000 I guarantee you, he has had a mock trial at his house for who shot first.

00:39:50.000 Wow.

00:39:51.000 And then for his wife, who's enormous.

00:39:54.000 I can see it.

00:39:55.000 His wife weighs 420 pounds.

00:39:58.000 And she just had liposuction.

00:40:00.000 That's not good.

00:40:00.000 It didn't work.

00:40:01.000 So she weighs that much after?

00:40:03.000 Yeah.

00:40:04.000 They took out a couple jars of fat.

00:40:06.000 Oh, that's it.

00:40:06.000 She's still morbidly obese.

00:40:08.000 That's his job of the hut fetish.

00:40:10.000 He lays on with his bag?

00:40:11.000 He lays on with a relief.

00:40:12.000 I hate his cheap H ⁇ M fucking blazer shit.

00:40:15.000 Yeah.

00:40:16.000 He wears the cheapest suits.

00:40:32.000 Is there even text on this?

00:40:33.000 I don't think there needs to be.

00:40:34.000 No.

00:40:35.000 My God, you guys.

00:40:36.000 Do you think I'm doing a good job?

00:40:38.000 For who?

00:40:43.000 2-0, we have the state rep for East Brooklyn, whatever you call these people.

00:40:48.000 That's the book.

00:40:49.000 Yep.

00:40:53.000 Go to 2-0.

00:40:55.000 So Hakeem Jeffries represents East Brooklyn, which is also known as East New York, which is hell on earth.

00:41:05.000 Worse than the South Bronx by a long shot.

00:41:08.000 About 90% of the murders in New York City are in East New York.

00:41:12.000 It is a fucking war zone.

00:41:15.000 If we were to drive around in the day, you'd see nothing because everyone's asleep.

00:41:18.000 It comes alive at night and it dies at night.

00:41:21.000 There is a murder a day in East New York.

00:41:25.000 So Hakeem Jeffries, to represent his constituents, he's anti-prison because every single person in his district is going to prison.

00:41:34.000 End mass incarceration.

00:41:37.000 Defund the prison industrial complex.

00:41:38.000 I'm inclined to agree with you, Hakeem, although I don't agree with your motives.

00:41:42.000 And then the same guy a year later, it's cropped, Ryan.

00:41:48.000 Lock up Kyle Rittenhouse and throw away the key.

00:41:51.000 Why is this a racial thing, by the way?

00:41:53.000 If you look at Grindface and Shiz Mabin and Tariq Nasheed, they're obsessed with how Kyle Rittenhouse is racist.

00:42:03.000 A white dude shot, a white awesome guy shot three white assholes.

00:42:09.000 Sorry, Browns.

00:42:10.000 You're not invited to this discussion.

00:42:12.000 Yeah, in the comments of Shiz Mabin, he posts, you know, Kyle crying, and people are like, dude, what the fuck?

00:42:19.000 He's like, are you not going to march for him if he gets out or whatever?

00:42:23.000 They're like, no, he ain't black.

00:42:24.000 We're not going to march for him.

00:42:25.000 I was like, I commented, I was like, your whole page is not a unity between black people.

00:42:33.000 It's just them killing each other.

00:42:34.000 So where's this brotherhood?

00:42:36.000 Yeah, that's the weird thing about all these ghetto social media accounts.

00:42:39.000 It's just constantly talking about how the cops are assholes and they're racist and they pick on blacks for no reason.

00:42:44.000 And then 37 videos of blacks like destroying a Wendy's and having a shootout at a Taco Bell.

00:42:53.000 Have you checked your own social media page?

00:42:56.000 It's all about the world.

00:42:57.000 Okay, let's be honest for a change.

00:42:59.000 This is fake.

00:43:01.000 You think so?

00:43:02.000 Yeah.

00:43:04.000 I thought so maybe on the second time, but the first time I was like, I don't know about the...

00:43:08.000 The last part?

00:43:09.000 I don't know.

00:43:10.000 You know what?

00:43:10.000 It might be.

00:43:11.000 There's a gray area between fake and real.

00:43:13.000 I did a movie called Critical Compliance.

00:43:18.000 What the fuck was it called?

00:43:19.000 Where it was about the future, where we had these future phones, these glasses.

00:43:23.000 What was that movie called?

00:43:26.000 Anyway, you can look it up.

00:43:27.000 We shot a scene where they wanted me to cry because my wife has cancer.

00:43:31.000 And my son, my newborn, my youngest boy, had control.

00:43:35.000 Creative control.

00:43:37.000 He had just had an operation because he had an infection in his inner thigh from a diaper rash that got really bad.

00:43:44.000 So we had to go to like an operating room that was the same kind of room where you had to do a heart transplant.

00:43:50.000 Like there's surgeons, hands wash, and there's my little tiny baby.

00:43:53.000 He must have been maybe a year old.

00:43:55.000 And everyone has the hair nets and everything, the shower caps.

00:43:58.000 And it was like he might as well be getting a leg transplant.

00:44:01.000 It was the same amount of infrastructure.

00:44:04.000 So it was harrowing, to say the least.

00:44:06.000 And my wife was blubbering.

00:44:08.000 I was holding her.

00:44:09.000 And all I had to do, because it had just happened, was summon that.

00:44:12.000 And I would cry.

00:44:15.000 So they said, can you cry on command?

00:44:17.000 I go, I'll try.

00:44:18.000 And I brought that up.

00:44:19.000 And instead of being like, I'm really worried about her, man.

00:44:24.000 And have a solitary tear, I was like, and I was like drenched.

00:44:32.000 And I could see the cameraman going, what the fuck?

00:44:35.000 And like, oh, the PAs were sort of looking at each other going, should we call 911?

00:44:40.000 And they couldn't use it.

00:44:42.000 It was authentic, but it was totally over the top.

00:44:46.000 Authentic isn't always cinematic.

00:44:48.000 Exactly.

00:44:48.000 Just because you're crying doesn't mean you're acting.

00:44:50.000 You're doing a good job.

00:44:52.000 And I think that's what might have happened here.

00:44:55.000 The lawyer sort of indicated, I can't tell you to cry, but it wouldn't be terrible if you were to cry on the stand.

00:45:02.000 And so he said, okay, I'll see what I can do.

00:45:04.000 And then he started and it went.

00:45:07.000 Yeah.

00:45:07.000 Because there's probably a lot of emotions going through this guy's fucking veins.

00:45:10.000 He's facing life in prison.

00:45:15.000 But I think it was a good move.

00:45:18.000 Look at blacks laughing.

00:45:21.000 Oh, there we go.

00:45:22.000 Is that the shizmobbin dude?

00:45:26.000 No.

00:45:26.000 No, no, no, no.

00:45:28.000 He's a black dude.

00:45:28.000 He's a rapper with This group that raps with dipset and stuff.

00:45:33.000 So over here, Prop Joe says, He's a 17-year-old kid showing genuine remorse for taking life, and that's a grown man laughing at a child crying.

00:45:41.000 He said, Shut the fuck up, weirdo.

00:45:42.000 He killed two TO white people.

00:45:45.000 Fuck out of here, Weirdo.

00:45:46.000 What is he can't spell two?

00:45:47.000 What do you mean?

00:45:48.000 No, he cannot.

00:45:51.000 I think six-year-olds can spell two.

00:45:54.000 Yeah.

00:45:55.000 It's basically one to ten and A to Z. Those are like the first things you learn, right?

00:46:02.000 Yeah, did you see LeBron James was calling him a pussy and saying he's fake crying?

00:46:06.000 And LeBron James fake cried when he hurt his leg.

00:46:10.000 And LeBron James goes, looks like this guy had too many lemon heads.

00:46:14.000 And now everyone's calling LeBron James lemon head.

00:46:17.000 But I think he fake cried.

00:46:19.000 I think it was real tears, but it just came out just like the example I just gave you.

00:46:23.000 But I think it was a good move.

00:46:26.000 This is what the defense did.

00:46:29.000 They had 15 in blackjack.

00:46:31.000 They said hit me, and they got a six.

00:46:34.000 It worked.

00:46:36.000 Because now the media has these tears.

00:46:38.000 Those are wet eyes, yeah.

00:46:40.000 Yeah.

00:46:41.000 And you know, Americans were obsessed with showed no remorse.

00:46:47.000 I was cooking breakfast or lunch or something watching this, and I got, it got me.

00:46:52.000 Yeah, well, you're a meathead.

00:46:53.000 I got very upset.

00:46:54.000 Yeah, you're a moron.

00:46:55.000 You get upset playing video games.

00:46:57.000 I do not.

00:46:57.000 You cry during the interstitials in video games.

00:47:00.000 That's not true.

00:47:01.000 I skipped the interstitials.

00:47:02.000 You're a chick in the game.

00:47:03.000 I just want to play.

00:47:03.000 I skip the interstitials.

00:47:05.000 I'm a real man.

00:47:06.000 I'm a real man.

00:47:07.000 I just want to be Spider-Man again.

00:47:10.000 Jack Pisobic had a good montage of media bias.

00:47:13.000 We're reaching example exhaustion.

00:47:16.000 We'll be done this in a second.

00:47:18.000 But this is a great montage.

00:47:19.000 My favorite part of this montage is Sank Uger saying deeply racist.

00:47:25.000 He goes, this deeply racist guy, like it's a given.

00:47:29.000 Talking about public opinion on the case.

00:47:32.000 And it's interesting because it is split.

00:47:34.000 I may have to jump forward.

00:47:35.000 I want to go back.

00:47:36.000 I want to take you back a recredibility.

00:47:38.000 Jack Pasovic is kicking ass.

00:47:42.000 Rittenhouse is basically what you would have had in a school shooter.

00:47:46.000 He's a 17-year-old kid.

00:47:47.000 He shouldn't have had a gun.

00:47:48.000 He crossed state lines to supposedly protect property.

00:47:51.000 No, he was going out to shoot people.

00:47:53.000 Kyle Rittenhouse, a vigilante.

00:47:55.000 Kyle Rittenhouse, the armed teenage vigilante.

00:47:57.000 A 17-year-old vigilante, arguably a domestic terrorist, picked up a rifle, drove to a different state to shoot people.

00:48:05.000 I never heard you guys mention state lines before.

00:48:07.000 Why are you so worried about state lines?

00:48:10.000 Didn't Kasparian since go back on this?

00:48:13.000 That was pretty big, yeah.

00:48:14.000 Who's deeply racist went with weapons?

00:48:17.000 Show that again.

00:48:18.000 Go back up to the country.

00:48:20.000 Drove to a different state to shoot people.

00:48:21.000 Kyle Rittenhouse, a guy who's deeply racist, went with weapons to a Black Lives Matter protest, looking to get in trouble.

00:48:29.000 He did.

00:48:30.000 He murdered a couple of people.

00:48:31.000 Rittenhouse, the 17-year-old kid, just running around, shooting and killing protesters.

00:48:38.000 17 years old, picks up a gun, drives one state to another.

00:48:43.000 Like Alex Jones is known as eccentric and crazy.

00:48:46.000 This is mainstream leftist news.

00:48:48.000 Joe Scarborough, who is considered kind of towards the center, isn't he?

00:48:52.000 And he's saying, just running around shooting people.

00:48:55.000 That's what housewives are tuning into when they do their ironing.

00:49:00.000 How is that a mainstream thing to say?

00:49:02.000 It's radical leftism.

00:49:08.000 Shoot people.

00:49:09.000 A 17-year-old boy who drove across state lines with an AR-15 and started shooting people up, including a guy with a skateboard.

00:49:22.000 Rittenhouse is a 17-year-old that went with a weapon into the middle of protests and then provoked people and then shot and killed them.

00:49:30.000 Kyle Rittenhouse is the enemy.

00:49:32.000 A boy from out of state drives up to the state with an AR-15 around his neck, shoots and kills a couple of people, shooting wildly, running around, acting like Rindicop.

00:49:46.000 Drove across state lines armed with a rifle to go and shoot people.

00:49:52.000 What a dark, dystopian scene where a 17-year-old boy is carrying around a rifle, running around.

00:50:04.000 All right, now he saw that.

00:50:06.000 Running around.

00:50:07.000 He was running around.

00:50:08.000 He was running for his life, actually.

00:50:11.000 I didn't know.

00:50:11.000 I learned that he's a lifeguard.

00:50:14.000 He was trained in Stop the Bleed.

00:50:16.000 He was working with the firefighters.

00:50:17.000 Yeah, he was PR.

00:50:19.000 He was, you know what they say, a Boy Scout?

00:50:21.000 Yeah.

00:50:22.000 He was a Boy Scout.

00:50:23.000 Literally a jack of all Boy Scoutish-like trades.

00:50:26.000 Anna Kasparian.

00:50:28.000 Did you want to see that?

00:50:29.000 Yeah.

00:50:30.000 I was wrong about that.

00:50:31.000 Okay.

00:50:32.000 I was wrong about that.

00:50:33.000 Okay.

00:50:33.000 So I want to correct the record.

00:50:35.000 I was, in fact, wrong about that.

00:50:37.000 So look, these details matter because if you're going to make an argument that you acted in self-defense, there needs to be some proof that there was an imminent threat.

00:50:48.000 Now, what really mattered to me was how all of this unfolded.

00:50:52.000 What was the thing that sparked it?

00:50:54.000 What started all of it?

00:50:55.000 And initially, I was under the assumption that Rittenhouse was the person who was chasing after Joseph Rosenbaum, that that's how it started.

00:51:06.000 But I was wrong about that.

00:51:07.000 Okay, so I want to correct the record.

00:51:09.000 I was, in fact, wrong about that.

00:51:11.000 All right.

00:51:11.000 Yep.

00:51:12.000 Let's jump to 2-5, where Drew Hernandez schools, the retarded Star Wars prosecutor.

00:51:20.000 And then we have one more prison rape.

00:51:24.000 And a reporter?

00:51:25.000 Yes.

00:51:25.000 Earlier, you identified yourself as a professional commentator.

00:51:30.000 All the above.

00:51:33.000 Is it your practice as a journalist to interject your personal opinion into the stories you're reporting on?

00:51:40.000 No.

00:51:41.000 But you did that here.

00:51:43.000 Where?

00:51:44.000 On August 25th, a few minutes after these shootings, you posted on Twitter your opinion as to whether the defendant in your mind was right or wrong in doing what he did, correct?

00:51:56.000 No, I said apparently at the beginning of that statement.

00:52:00.000 What effect does that have?

00:52:02.000 It means apparently.

00:52:04.000 It doesn't mean that this is 100% my opinion.

00:52:09.000 You had already jumped to an apparent conclusion at that moment, right?

00:52:14.000 No, that's what it apparently means.

00:52:15.000 But that's not what journalists do, right?

00:52:21.000 I'll be done.

00:52:22.000 Thank you.

00:52:23.000 I fucked up.

00:52:24.000 And I'm going to stop this.

00:52:26.000 That's exactly what just happened there.

00:52:28.000 I didn't think about apparently.

00:52:29.000 I forgot you said apparently.

00:52:31.000 I got to can this line of questions.

00:52:33.000 It was endless.

00:52:34.000 And you know how many times during the middle of his cross-examinations, his various, you know, with the witnesses, that they just went to lunch?

00:52:43.000 Like, all right, we're going to go to lunch.

00:52:45.000 Yeah, I've never really watched a trial like I watched this.

00:52:48.000 I watched every second of it.

00:52:49.000 It was fascinating.

00:52:50.000 It was great to have on in the background when you clean your office.

00:52:53.000 Clean your room?

00:52:54.000 Clean your room.

00:52:56.000 But yes, there was one point where he was asking him, when Kyle Rittnouse was on the stand, the prosecution kept asking the same kind of question in a loop.

00:53:05.000 Like, you don't bring a gun when you do your laundry.

00:53:08.000 You don't bring a gun when you go play a video game.

00:53:10.000 You don't bring a gun when you're washing the dishes.

00:53:13.000 And I was like, are you trying to drive him insane?

00:53:15.000 Because you're driving me insane.

00:53:18.000 And I've been in these situations too where you're in a fight with your wife or something and you're just like, I'm out.

00:53:24.000 And you just walk out the front door.

00:53:27.000 What's that sound?

00:53:29.000 Is that a vibration?

00:53:31.000 Oh, it's someone calling me.

00:53:35.000 You see that?

00:53:35.000 Did you hear my ringtone?

00:53:36.000 No, but I felt it.

00:53:38.000 The vibes.

00:53:40.000 Is this you coming up here?

00:53:42.000 That's the movie.

00:53:43.000 Oh, I thought that was you for a second.

00:53:45.000 No.

00:53:45.000 Punching the dude.

00:53:47.000 That's the director, Ben something.

00:53:49.000 That looks pretty cool.

00:53:49.000 I think he got canceled after this movie because he put me in it.

00:53:53.000 And he went into a deep depression.

00:53:56.000 He may have actually given up.

00:53:57.000 There's me.

00:53:58.000 Oh, shit.

00:53:58.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:53:59.000 It looks like a good fucking movie.

00:54:02.000 It is.

00:54:03.000 Well, I've never heard you mention this.

00:54:05.000 It's one of my...

00:54:06.000 Are you embarrassed?

00:54:08.000 One of my great movies.

00:54:09.000 Look, there's me.

00:54:10.000 Nice.

00:54:11.000 What are you saying in that?

00:54:12.000 Let's see what you say.

00:54:14.000 Leaving consciousness rather than creating it.

00:54:17.000 I don't have time for this.

00:54:19.000 Get out of here.

00:54:19.000 What are we talking about?

00:54:20.000 You're just playing yourself?

00:54:24.000 I played a creative director at an ad agency when I was a creative director at an ad agency.

00:54:30.000 Give me a pound.

00:54:31.000 Let's blow up this rock.

00:54:32.000 It's gotta be the worst.

00:54:34.000 That's also you.

00:54:37.000 It was not a challenge.

00:54:39.000 It's like when Courtney Love plays a stupid junkie bitch in a movie.

00:54:44.000 All right, final thing.

00:54:45.000 We talked about this yesterday.

00:54:46.000 Stop talking about Bubba.

00:54:48.000 Remember this?

00:54:48.000 We talked about this last night?

00:54:50.000 It's not a thing with Bubba being your roommate and him raping you.

00:54:53.000 There's faggots in prison.

00:54:56.000 But look at this.

00:54:56.000 Kid vicious.

00:54:57.000 I have zero sympathy for Kyle Rittenhouse.

00:55:00.000 Black and Latino kids have been in prison and killed just for the color of their skin.

00:55:03.000 False.

00:55:04.000 He killed people.

00:55:06.000 That's it.

00:55:07.000 And that's the same face Kyle Rittenhouse will make during his first time in the prison shower.

00:55:14.000 I think it's based on the 80s, this whole thing.

00:55:17.000 We do not participate in Roy Moore pickup lines because we do not make fun of sexual assault, but extra, especially when it's kids.

00:55:22.000 Oh, the same woman who said this is against rape jokes.

00:55:28.000 Go fuck yourself, you traitorous.

00:55:31.000 How do you pronounce that word?

00:55:32.000 Traitorous?

00:55:33.000 Traitorous rape apologist, this better end you.

00:55:38.000 There's no place in America for child rape.

00:55:40.000 There's no place in America for traitorous rape enablers.

00:55:43.000 You belong in prison, you fucking criminal.

00:55:45.000 Russian shill.

00:55:47.000 Why does she spell Jim like that?

00:55:50.000 Yeah, that's weird.

00:55:52.000 Who is Tara Dublin?

00:55:54.000 Why is she verified?

00:55:56.000 Look her up.

00:55:57.000 I want to see who this bitch is.

00:55:58.000 Tara Dublin.

00:56:00.000 What did you say, Dublin?

00:56:01.000 Tara Dublin.

00:56:03.000 Tara Dublin Rocks.

00:56:05.000 Apparently, that's her name.

00:56:06.000 Oh, look at all those F-E-R-R.

00:56:08.000 Writer, PDX, adjacent Jersey girl, contributor to The Hill.

00:56:12.000 I thought The Hill was right wing.

00:56:14.000 It was PDX.

00:56:15.000 I think they crossed over the dark side.

00:56:17.000 Meaning.

00:56:18.000 Oh, mine.

00:56:19.000 Look at those different hands.

00:56:20.000 Portland, Oregon.

00:56:22.000 Brown, white.

00:56:23.000 They're all gay.

00:56:25.000 What a stupid piece of shit.

00:56:27.000 Let's jump over to racism, shall we?

00:56:31.000 Let's get a heap and dose.

00:56:35.000 Because those hands reminded me of something.

00:56:37.000 Hispanics are white.

00:56:39.000 I'm a black female.

00:56:41.000 What other differences...

00:56:43.000 What else could I have done to piss you off?

00:56:45.000 Black woman?

00:56:47.000 This is really inconvenient.

00:57:06.000 I don't like when people have visible things on the desk.

00:57:11.000 Yeah.

00:57:12.000 It's distracting, but after a good cup of Dunkin' Donuts coffee, it makes me feel better for whatever kind of crappiness I feel.

00:57:21.000 America runs on it.

00:57:22.000 That's kind of my beef with Kumia.

00:57:24.000 It'll often have guests with their water bottle on the thing.

00:57:28.000 Bad luck.

00:57:31.000 3-5.

00:57:32.000 This has inspired me, that woman's fuck you fingers.

00:57:36.000 The variety of them.

00:57:41.000 I was actually shocked to see this.

00:57:43.000 The distribution of skin color among U.S. Hispanics is white.

00:57:50.000 Look at that.

00:57:50.000 28% are as white as me.

00:58:01.000 Half a percent are black.

00:58:02.000 People put the skin chart up with this guy's face.

00:58:08.000 And he white.

00:58:10.000 He white.

00:58:11.000 He's like red white.

00:58:13.000 He's like Irish color.

00:58:14.000 Yeah, I'm surprised his hair is even curly.

00:58:16.000 Remember they tried to cancel Dave Portnoy because he thought he said, I thought that guy was Arab.

00:58:21.000 I thought he was like a jihadist when I first saw him.

00:58:24.000 Yeah, so did we all.

00:58:26.000 That looks like a goat man.

00:58:30.000 He looks like an Italian.

00:58:32.000 A little bit.

00:58:32.000 Looks like Tommy Baggs from my gym.

00:58:34.000 A little swarthier than him.

00:58:35.000 You know why Tommy Baggs is called Tommy Bags?

00:58:38.000 No.

00:58:38.000 Because he replenishes ATMs for a living, so he always has bags of money.

00:58:42.000 Nice.

00:58:46.000 This is, I thought, interesting.

00:58:48.000 I think my theory, where I say everyone's basically white, I really mean like Western and American.

00:58:54.000 And the only people that are not white are blacks, poor blacks.

00:59:00.000 And they have a justified beef with America, with slavery and all that.

00:59:04.000 The rest need to shut the fuck up.

00:59:06.000 No one minds if Denzel Washington moves next door.

00:59:09.000 And Asians are white.

00:59:11.000 And I noticed recently, as far as college applicants go, they are white.

00:59:17.000 Check out 3-4.

00:59:20.000 We stand for change.

00:59:22.000 We want to live in a world where good black soccer players can become professionals and make millions of dollars.

00:59:29.000 This is the lovely Lauren Chen.

00:59:32.000 Students of color, minus Asian.

00:59:35.000 Like, they make no bones about it.

00:59:37.000 Wow.

00:59:38.000 Minus Asian.

00:59:39.000 Welcome, Ryan.

00:59:41.000 You know, that's funny.

00:59:42.000 Because I was filling out a form the other day.

00:59:44.000 I had to check out my stuff in the hospital.

00:59:46.000 Hispanic wasn't there.

00:59:48.000 It was white, Asian, two different types of Native American, black.

00:59:53.000 Yeah.

00:59:54.000 Two different types of Native American.

00:59:56.000 Native Americans were like, yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:59:57.000 One's actually Native American, one's like Polynesian or like Samoan, whatever the fuck.

01:00:01.000 Samoan.

01:00:02.000 How many Samoans give birth at your hospital?

01:00:05.000 If you're going to have those, you don't have Hispanic.

01:00:07.000 Hispanic was not on the form.

01:00:09.000 I looked it over like three times.

01:00:10.000 I was like, I guess we're white.

01:00:14.000 I'm double white.

01:00:15.000 So what did you call it?

01:00:16.000 I'm Asian and Hispanic.

01:00:17.000 I'm white.

01:00:18.000 Yeah.

01:00:19.000 You're whiter than me.

01:00:20.000 I just, I think maybe you're every white race.

01:00:23.000 Just mine.

01:00:25.000 This is hilarious.

01:00:26.000 You're all whites.

01:00:27.000 Yep.

01:00:28.000 It's all white.

01:00:30.000 Nobody worry about me.

01:00:33.000 Oh, I thought this was interesting.

01:00:35.000 This black dude was talking on Twitter about how he got dumped for being a Trump supporter, and he makes it about race.

01:00:40.000 Dude, hey, Adam, I was dumped for being a Trump supporter.

01:00:44.000 We all were.

01:00:45.000 I once had a friend, a white liberal female, who used to joke with me about woke people post-riots, suddenly sound just like them.

01:00:51.000 As we were arguing, she said, well, I listened to black voices, and I said, I'm black.

01:00:54.000 Does my voice matter?

01:00:55.000 I have nipples.

01:00:57.000 I have black nipples, Craig.

01:00:59.000 Can you hear them?

01:01:00.000 Can you chocolate milk me?

01:01:04.000 And he goes on.

01:01:04.000 You can see the whole thread.

01:01:05.000 It's an interesting thread.

01:01:07.000 We used to have conversations.

01:01:08.000 This is a person I would spend holidays with her family.

01:01:11.000 I talk about another friend from Europe I met while traveling.

01:01:14.000 We met multiple times during our travels, blah, blah, blah.

01:01:16.000 And then it fell through from there.

01:01:20.000 That's not how to use fell through, but go ahead.

01:01:23.000 Our friendship was now minimalized into being about my supposed victimhood.

01:01:27.000 Yeah, if I were you in that situation, Adam, it would be about black supposed victimhood.

01:01:34.000 They've just moved the pawn and the chessboard over one.

01:01:37.000 It would still be the same thing.

01:01:40.000 I would never deny there's some racist people because it exists, blah, blah, blah.

01:01:43.000 So yeah, I thought that was interesting.

01:01:44.000 As a black conservative, you think, holy shit, everyone's dumping me because I'm not fulfilling my black role.

01:01:50.000 No.

01:01:51.000 They are Xing everyone slightly right of center.

01:01:56.000 So pull race out of it, dude.

01:01:57.000 I told her to go fuck herself.

01:01:59.000 Yeah.

01:02:00.000 I say that to my kids.

01:02:01.000 See, if you're in an argument with someone at your age, don't try to be witty.

01:02:07.000 Don't try to outsmart them.

01:02:08.000 Just say, go fuck yourself.

01:02:11.000 The end.

01:02:12.000 By the way, this is trending.

01:02:14.000 Speaking of racism, racist Joe Biden is trending.

01:02:18.000 Pretty good.

01:02:18.000 My opponent wins.

01:02:19.000 They're going to put you all back in chains.

01:02:20.000 Unless we do something about this, my children are going to grow up in a jungle.

01:02:23.000 Well, let's just jump then from racism temporarily to my pet Biden and go to 3-1.

01:02:32.000 We have to cover this, of course, where he's talked about a great Negro.

01:02:42.000 You know, I've adopted the attitude of the great Negro at the time, pitcher Negro went on to become a great pitcher.

01:02:53.000 It's like the shoeshine guy.

01:02:55.000 If you're not nice to the shoeshine guy, I don't like it.

01:02:57.000 We did show this last night, too.

01:02:59.000 And then we juxtaposed that with him telling the Pope that he's the greatest black American pitcher in the world.

01:03:07.000 You're the greatest African-American pitcher in the world.

01:03:10.000 Go to 3-8.

01:03:13.000 Oh, yeah, this is going around.

01:03:15.000 And I've heard Kumiya say it, actually.

01:03:16.000 I keep mentioning him this show.

01:03:17.000 Seth Barron Rules.

01:03:18.000 He wants to be interviewed, too.

01:03:19.000 He just released a book about New York.

01:03:21.000 Oh, great.

01:03:21.000 We'll have him on the show.

01:03:22.000 In 1930, the MIC was whiter than the state of Maine is today.

01:03:25.000 So the idea that any urban planning measure taken was racist against blacks and Puerto Ricans is preposterous.

01:03:30.000 Yes, that's true.

01:03:32.000 They did build the bridges low on Long Island to keep out city folks.

01:03:37.000 They didn't want them coming to visit the beaches on Long Island.

01:03:41.000 But there was no blacks in 1930.

01:03:44.000 Talk to someone, an old person who grew up in Manhattan.

01:03:48.000 In the 50s, Manhattan was completely white.

01:03:51.000 It was crime-free, too, coincidentally.

01:03:54.000 And this is a friend of Ann Coulter's, I know.

01:03:57.000 He's like 70.

01:03:58.000 He goes, we would just sleep in Central Park.

01:04:02.000 We didn't have air conditioning.

01:04:04.000 So we would go and bring sleeping bags and pillows and just lie down on the grass in Central Park.

01:04:10.000 The whole city would just sleep there at night.

01:04:14.000 Now we have the exonerated five, and you're not allowed to do that anymore.

01:04:17.000 You get fucking raped to death.

01:04:22.000 So yeah, it was to keep out the poor, not blacks and Puerto Ricans.

01:04:27.000 Today, the poor represent blacks and Puerto Ricans.

01:04:30.000 Back then, it was just poor.

01:04:32.000 Probably Irish and Italian.

01:04:36.000 3.9 noticed that the left wants woke back.

01:04:43.000 Go down a bit to AOC.

01:04:46.000 One dangerous aspect of thinking there's a woke problem is that damn chances of reelection, blah, blah, blah.

01:04:50.000 Woke is a term pundits are now using as a derogatory euphemism for civil rights and justice.

01:04:56.000 Making up a woke problem results in putting civil and voting rights on the back burner.

01:05:00.000 In a year, state legislators are planning out GOP majorities and voter suppression.

01:05:05.000 That's dangerous.

01:05:07.000 If you're not black and started using woke pejoratively sometime post-2018 or so, or worse, don't know anything about the earlier iteration of the term, I think it's fair to consider it a racial slur.

01:05:18.000 Okay, fine.

01:05:20.000 See, this is my attitude with all these things.

01:05:22.000 You get these allegations and you go, all right, gotcha.

01:05:27.000 The worst thing you can do, as we learned from Dave Chappelle's Black Nanette special, is sit there and say, I'm not racist and I'm not transphobic.

01:05:35.000 I'm not homophobic.

01:05:36.000 Stop apologizing.

01:05:36.000 It's boring.

01:05:38.000 Just say, okay.

01:05:40.000 You want to say woke is racist?

01:05:41.000 Fine.

01:05:42.000 You want to say this is a white power symbol?

01:05:45.000 All right.

01:05:46.000 Whatever you want.

01:05:47.000 I don't give a shit about your silly beliefs.

01:05:51.000 If you want to sit down and have a debate, I'm happy to do that.

01:05:54.000 But you know that I will slaughter you.

01:05:56.000 It will be embarrassing because your entire ethos is based on made-up facts.

01:06:03.000 My belief system is made up on fact facts.

01:06:09.000 You see that veiled threat there?

01:06:11.000 Doesn't mean I'm going to do anything to you or that anyone else will, but it doesn't mean I won't either.

01:06:17.000 So Joel D. Anderson is going to beat me up.

01:06:21.000 We'll see about that, Joel.

01:06:23.000 What's his story, Joel D. Anderson?

01:06:25.000 Does he write for The Hill too?

01:06:26.000 I can't believe Antifa is writing for The Hill.

01:06:29.000 It's an Antifa newsletter now?

01:06:31.000 Tara Dublin.

01:06:34.000 It's Slate.

01:06:35.000 Host season three of Slow Burn.

01:06:38.000 ESPN BuzzFeed News.

01:06:39.000 Yeah, he's an idiot.

01:06:40.000 He's an affirmative action hire.

01:06:42.000 If you're black and incompetent, go write for BuzzFeed.

01:06:45.000 They'd love to have you.

01:06:48.000 Your baby is racist, Ryan.

01:06:50.000 I didn't know that.

01:06:51.000 Yep.

01:06:52.000 Well, I don't know how you carry it.

01:06:54.000 Do you carry it?

01:06:55.000 Do you have a baby Bjorn?

01:06:58.000 No, not yet.

01:06:59.000 Oh, I have a baby carrier that I have not.

01:07:01.000 Your baby's so small, it would slip out the leg of a baby Bjorn.

01:07:04.000 Yeah, we're going to wait until she could fit.

01:07:07.000 You should just keep her in a tea bag.

01:07:09.000 We have been.

01:07:11.000 You know how to carry around your baby?

01:07:13.000 Find a gym sock and just plop her in it.

01:07:16.000 And then hold a corner of the gym sock.

01:07:19.000 Because it would be too roomy without doing that.

01:07:21.000 Yeah, yeah.

01:07:23.000 She is small, but she's not decimal.

01:07:26.000 I'm not insulting her.

01:07:28.000 She's not decimal.

01:07:30.000 I don't mind if she's small.

01:07:31.000 She's a little girl and Asian.

01:07:33.000 Supposed to be small.

01:07:35.000 T, it's supposed to be small.

01:07:38.000 Yeah.

01:07:38.000 The Asian baby.

01:07:40.000 Look, we're not going to insult your baby, but we can make jokes about it being small.

01:07:43.000 Yeah, she's small.

01:07:44.000 I'm not getting offended.

01:07:45.000 Sound like you're getting offended.

01:07:46.000 No, I promise I wasn't.

01:07:48.000 The way you choose to carry your child might be racist.

01:07:52.000 Inspiration versus appropriation is a big topic in baby wearing circles with plenty of controversies over the years.

01:07:58.000 Can we talk about white appropriation?

01:08:00.000 Like, isn't everything visible minorities do in America white appropriation?

01:08:06.000 From Beyoncé's hair to driving a car?

01:08:10.000 Like, I take one of your things, wearing a baby in a sling, and now I'm like ravaging your culture.

01:08:18.000 Shaq's the only one doing something about it, not using a phone and using vibes instead.

01:08:22.000 Yeah.

01:08:23.000 God bless Shaq.

01:08:24.000 But the reason carrying a baby is racist is everything is racist.

01:08:27.000 If you go to 4-1, you can see that breeding, simply having a baby is racist.

01:08:37.000 I think my partner's reason for suddenly wanting kids might be racist.

01:08:39.000 We originally agreed not to have children, but now he's saying our genes are too quote-unquote smart not to pass on.

01:08:46.000 Says Rebecca Onion.

01:08:50.000 It's irresponsible to have children given the state of the world.

01:08:53.000 And then just like Kyle Rittenhouse, they managed to make it racial.

01:08:58.000 You're talking about climate change and global population.

01:09:02.000 And now whites can't have babies.

01:09:04.000 Can blacks have babies?

01:09:06.000 Look at that stupid, ugly bitch.

01:09:08.000 She looks oniony.

01:09:09.000 Yeah.

01:09:10.000 It makes me cry.

01:09:11.000 I'm glad she's not breeding.

01:09:14.000 Several of our friends have had babies, and he said that it would be dysgenic for us not to have babies because we're both smart.

01:09:22.000 That has to be...

01:09:23.000 Whites are so self-hating that they can't even acknowledge their own IQs and they have to put it in quotes.

01:09:28.000 The word smart has to be in quotes.

01:09:34.000 Talk about cucked.

01:09:36.000 Although it's always scored very high on standardized tests, you just got to get that in there.

01:09:40.000 I do not believe they are valid measures of anything.

01:09:42.000 Why'd you take the tests then?

01:09:44.000 Regularly.

01:09:46.000 Why are you regularly taking standardized tests if you don't think they're a valid measure?

01:09:52.000 I found this conversation bizarre and probably racist.

01:09:54.000 Frankly, I thought he was too enlightened to believe such things.

01:09:57.000 He's too smart to believe in breeding.

01:10:02.000 You're an idiot if you want to have a baby.

01:10:04.000 So you're an idiot, Ryan.

01:10:05.000 Oh, man.

01:10:06.000 But you're not white, so maybe that's good.

01:10:08.000 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

01:10:09.000 What's the next thing?

01:10:10.000 Well, I'm double white.

01:10:13.000 Zoom out.

01:10:16.000 So they respond to this, and they say, I don't know who they is, but the mainstream left.

01:10:23.000 Your boyfriend stated a reason for changing his mind strikes me as A, indeed yes, racist.

01:10:29.000 Indeed, a little bit racist.

01:10:31.000 Oh, that's nice.

01:10:31.000 But idiocracy wasn't about race.

01:10:34.000 There was no blacks in the movie at all.

01:10:37.000 B, a sign that he's either now come to think about the question differently or that his climate-related reasons for not wanting to reproduce were never the same as yours to begin with.

01:10:46.000 Go ahead, dummies.

01:10:48.000 Go not breed.

01:10:51.000 Was that 4-2?

01:10:52.000 Let's do 4-3.

01:10:57.000 Pull up 4-3?

01:10:58.000 I think that was 4-1.

01:10:59.000 So this is 4-2.

01:11:02.000 Oh, yes.

01:11:03.000 That's our old Josh LaCash.

01:11:05.000 The unbearable whiteness of camping.

01:11:08.000 You said you loved him, and I talked to him yesterday.

01:11:10.000 He says he loves you, too.

01:11:12.000 Okay, that's good to know.

01:11:14.000 The unbearable whiteness.

01:11:16.000 Like, that's a common term.

01:11:18.000 People of color have been excluded.

01:11:21.000 How are you fucking excluded?

01:11:24.000 Camping isn't a thing that's marketed.

01:11:26.000 No one benefits from camping.

01:11:27.000 There's no corporation that gets 10 cents every Time you camp.

01:11:31.000 So it's not advertised.

01:11:33.000 It's not like Coca-Cola where Coke wants you to drink Coke.

01:11:36.000 Nature doesn't give a shit.

01:11:38.000 Actually, they'd rather you didn't pop by.

01:11:40.000 Right.

01:11:46.000 So it's the unbearable whiteness of cycling, which, by the way, out up in West Chester, you see hordes of yuppies riding their bikes.

01:11:55.000 It's a pet peeve of mine.

01:11:57.000 Why are they wearing those stupid shirts?

01:11:59.000 I understand if you're a professional and you have a bunch of sponsors, but people in the suburbs wear shirts with fake sponsors on them.

01:12:08.000 Could you be more embarrassing?

01:12:09.000 Aren't you embarrassed?

01:12:12.000 Milk, indie, ballet, hiking, cycling.

01:12:15.000 Like, the implication here is that people are being excluded.

01:12:19.000 Hey, I want to buy this bicycle.

01:12:20.000 I want to go ride it.

01:12:21.000 I want to do some long distance cycle.

01:12:23.000 Sorry, sir.

01:12:26.000 I can't sell you this bicycle.

01:12:28.000 We would get looted.

01:12:30.000 They would burn this place.

01:12:31.000 They'd have a fiery but peaceful protest here if I sold you a bicycle.

01:12:35.000 You're bearably not white.

01:12:37.000 But yeah, what I was going to say is in Westchester, you see these like...

01:12:42.000 It'll be 30 guys on a bike.

01:12:45.000 What's this now?

01:12:46.000 Ryan's advertising himself.

01:12:48.000 This is the unbearable whiteness of wearing a suit.

01:12:51.000 I'm so glad your daughter didn't get that nose.

01:12:54.000 It's a nice nose.

01:12:56.000 What is with that?

01:12:58.000 When like a poor person wears a suit for the first time, they do this?

01:13:01.000 Like it's a fucking security vest?

01:13:04.000 Hey, I'm going to need you to go over there.

01:13:06.000 Have you ever held your lapels?

01:13:08.000 Never.

01:13:09.000 What the fuck is that?

01:13:10.000 Remember the guy going to see Aquaman?

01:13:18.000 You lost my train of thought now.

01:13:19.000 Unbearable whiteness.

01:13:21.000 Oh, yeah.

01:13:22.000 This is my fifth attempt at explaining this.

01:13:24.000 When those 30 dudes go by, 20 of them are black.

01:13:30.000 Pro-cycling in the suburbs where they're really ambitious about it is a black thing.

01:13:35.000 So the unbearable blackness of cycling in Westchester.

01:13:38.000 Holy shit, dude.

01:13:40.000 What?

01:13:40.000 We went to this nice little town, right?

01:13:44.000 And we're driving up this road and they have shirts that say bring color back to cycling or something like that or make cycling more diverse.

01:13:52.000 Why?

01:13:52.000 And dude, they're fucking in the road.

01:13:55.000 Like, they're not single file.

01:13:57.000 They sucked at cycling.

01:14:00.000 They were in the road, like all on the side of the right part of the road and then a little bit on the left side of the road, oncoming.

01:14:06.000 Should have hot.

01:14:08.000 I was just trying to get through them.

01:14:10.000 Yeah.

01:14:11.000 It's hilarious.

01:14:12.000 So maybe we should rewrite cycling just so it can be single file.

01:14:17.000 Follow the rules.

01:14:19.000 Yeah, look at them.

01:14:20.000 Man spreading.

01:14:21.000 That's exactly what it was like.

01:14:24.000 Williams Brothers hoping to inspire diverse cyclists.

01:14:27.000 That's good.

01:14:28.000 Why?

01:14:29.000 Who cares?

01:14:31.000 Who cares?

01:14:36.000 Who gives a fuck?

01:14:37.000 If you want to ride a bicycle, you can ride a bicycle.

01:14:40.000 Just don't.

01:14:40.000 No one's stopping you from doing anything.

01:14:42.000 It's America.

01:14:44.000 Go nuts.

01:14:45.000 But the one I stole isn't meant for you.

01:14:47.000 One day I went to Lidl.

01:14:48.000 I went to shoplift in Lidl.

01:14:50.000 Then I got caught in Lidl.

01:14:51.000 Now I can't go back to Lidl.

01:14:53.000 Like I had a Lidl thing on his thing, and I'm singing, of course, African Boy, an African immigrant who was shoplifting there.

01:15:00.000 Okay, do we do 4-3 yet?

01:15:05.000 Yes.

01:15:06.000 Yes.

01:15:06.000 All right.

01:15:06.000 So last item.

01:15:09.000 Second last item.

01:15:11.000 Oh, this was fun.

01:15:14.000 Hey, white people, it's okay to be ashamed.

01:15:17.000 Like white people need any more practice being ashamed.

01:15:20.000 Feeling ashamed of shameful things is not bad, she says in Michael Jackson, All Caps.

01:15:26.000 It's called being an empathetic and moral human being.

01:15:30.000 Shame helps us do better.

01:15:31.000 Okay, why don't you give it a whirl then, Ida?

01:15:34.000 What are you ashamed of?

01:15:36.000 The black crime rates?

01:15:38.000 When I visited the Hiroshima Peace Memorial Museum about the impact of the U.S.'s atomic bomb, as an American, I felt shame.

01:15:47.000 You know what I think when I think of Hiroshima and Nagasaki?

01:15:50.000 Pride.

01:15:52.000 Thank God they ended the war with a bunch of hard-headed nips who were determined to continue this stupid war forever.

01:16:03.000 They were goading America into a land invasion, which would have cost tens of thousands of lives.

01:16:11.000 And we didn't want to do that.

01:16:13.000 So we lit up that island on fire.

01:16:17.000 We burned Japan.

01:16:18.000 Possibly worse than the two atomic bombs was the flaming cities, the fiery and not peaceful bombings that went on pre-Hiroshima.

01:16:28.000 The emperor's response, go fuck yourself.

01:16:31.000 What?

01:16:32.000 I just lit your whole island on fire.

01:16:35.000 Yeah, I'm going to light you on fire, bitch.

01:16:36.000 It was like the night in Monty Python when they go, tis butt a scratch.

01:16:41.000 So we said, merely a flesh wound.

01:16:43.000 They were training little kids.

01:16:45.000 Go read Unbroken.

01:16:47.000 Luigi Fiorpini.

01:16:48.000 No, that's not his name.

01:16:49.000 Luis Zamparini.

01:16:51.000 Yeah.

01:16:53.000 They were training little kids and women to fight with bayonets.

01:16:58.000 So we went, all right, so by you training women and children, what you're really saying is I can kill all your men and you're still going to keep fighting.

01:17:05.000 All right, I need a boom.

01:17:08.000 And here's another thing amazing about that.

01:17:12.000 She says it's okay to recognize the sins of our past.

01:17:16.000 That's all white people do.

01:17:20.000 Even conservatives.

01:17:22.000 At Proud Boys meetups, we read that same page from The Death of the West by Pat Buchanan, where he says, yes, we did participate in slavery.

01:17:34.000 We did treat blacks as second-class citizens.

01:17:37.000 Yes, our behavior, our treatment of the Indians was not what one would expect for people to whom the Sermon on the Mount was divine command.

01:17:47.000 He lays all that out first, and then he goes, however, the time for apologies has passed.

01:17:52.000 So we can do shame.

01:17:54.000 We do it all the time.

01:17:55.000 But we also acknowledge through our faults that we were not the worst, But the best.

01:18:01.000 We didn't start slavery, we finished it.

01:18:05.000 So though we proudly acknowledge our faults, we love ourselves, warts and all, but we're aware of the warts, you stupid fucking cunt, who's trying to.

01:18:14.000 She's the one behind the 1619 project where she tries to exaggerate our warts and say we're all warts.

01:18:20.000 No.

01:18:21.000 No.

01:18:22.000 Nowhere do blacks, gays, trannies, all those stupid groups experience more freedom than in America, than in the West.

01:18:31.000 So you're welcome, you stupid bitch.

01:18:33.000 Also, I noticed in that thread, I can't find it now, but someone was saying, you know, what happened was the emperor tried to surrender.

01:18:42.000 And he had a condition, though.

01:18:44.000 He said, look, I'll surrender.

01:18:46.000 Can I just be the figurehead?

01:18:47.000 I won't have any power.

01:18:49.000 I just want to be the emperor.

01:18:51.000 And we said, fuck you.

01:18:52.000 And then we did Nagasaki.

01:18:53.000 We did Hiroshima.

01:18:54.000 And then he tried to surrender.

01:18:56.000 And then we did Nagasaki again because we wanted to see Japanese people die.

01:19:00.000 And when I saw that, it was from some black professor.

01:19:03.000 I went, okay, that sounds pretty bad.

01:19:06.000 That sounds worse than I had expected.

01:19:09.000 On August 10th, he tried to surrender, and then we bombed him again.

01:19:12.000 So I looked it up.

01:19:13.000 Guess when the second bombing was?

01:19:16.000 August 9th.

01:19:18.000 Of course he tried to surrender.

01:19:19.000 He just got both bombs up his ass.

01:19:22.000 And what's worse is we said okay.

01:19:26.000 So that whole notion that they tried to surrender and then we bombed them is completely false.

01:19:31.000 We gave them a bomb.

01:19:32.000 They didn't try to surrender.

01:19:34.000 We gave them another bomb.

01:19:34.000 He said, can I just retain my emperor status and have no authority?

01:19:37.000 And we went, okay.

01:19:39.000 And we took it.

01:19:42.000 Black cycling is going well, by the way.

01:19:46.000 Thank God.

01:19:47.000 First time riding with road bike and he crashed.

01:19:49.000 Black cyclist Manny rides with his best friend.

01:19:52.000 He's got to document it.

01:19:53.000 He gets his white coat friend and he says, oh, he fell.

01:19:58.000 This is his first time riding with those pedals that lock into your feet.

01:20:02.000 And he's gloated in the fact that on his first night, very supportive now that he's a black cyclist and racist.

01:20:08.000 They need our support.

01:20:09.000 Imagine how infantilized you'd feel if people were like trying to get you to ride a bicycle.

01:20:16.000 When did you learn to ride a bike?

01:20:17.000 Five?

01:20:18.000 I just want you to not steal mine.

01:20:20.000 Yeah.

01:20:21.000 I want you to ride a bike, your own bike.

01:20:29.000 And then, you know, he was stopped by a British KKK cop.

01:20:34.000 Poor guy.

01:20:35.000 Oh my God, that's real.

01:20:37.000 Yeah.

01:20:37.000 I thought you were joking.

01:20:39.000 No.

01:20:42.000 So how does it feel to do your first 20 minutes?

01:20:46.000 You need socks on your shoes.

01:20:54.000 Why do you get all this gear on your very first ride?

01:21:03.000 In general, I like being hard.

01:21:13.000 Well, he is wearing Rasta colours, so that's actually if that really happened, then I'm on his side.

01:21:19.000 Yeah, that's not cool.

01:21:20.000 What are you doing?

01:21:22.000 You could see everything that's on his person.

01:21:24.000 Yeah, he's not hiding a gun now.

01:21:26.000 He is literally wearing skin-tight clothing.

01:21:28.000 Go to 4-5.

01:21:29.000 This is our last racism piece.

01:21:36.000 Oh, I love this guy.

01:21:39.000 There he is.

01:21:42.000 The fuck him with me because I'm a teenager.

01:21:46.000 Here, they want white supremacy by ventriloquist effect.

01:21:49.000 There is a black mouth moving, but a white idea through the running on the runway of the tongue of a figure who justifies and legitimates the white supremacy.

01:22:02.000 First of all, legitimizes.

01:22:03.000 Normally, I wouldn't correct that, but if you're going to be racist, you might as well use the proper terminology.

01:22:07.000 This is exactly what the extreme political left does when they find a narrative that they can't control.

01:22:11.000 A black woman who goes against what is expected of her by being conservative is ignorant.

01:22:16.000 All right, let's jump over the mailbag.

01:22:20.000 Remember, he was on our network, Michael Eric Dyson, and he said, fucking with me because I'm a teenager with a little bit of gold and a pager.

01:22:30.000 And then I pointed out, I never should have been let out the penitentiary.

01:22:36.000 And Dyson goes, but that's a different song.

01:22:41.000 Okay.

01:22:41.000 So it's the same album, straight out of Compton.

01:22:45.000 Oh, it's so good.

01:22:48.000 He had a lot less attitude after that.

01:22:52.000 An N without attitude?

01:22:54.000 No, Jesus.

01:22:55.000 Wow.

01:22:55.000 Way to take my joke.

01:22:57.000 Sorry.

01:22:57.000 Rip it open.

01:23:00.000 Let's turn our eyes together.

01:23:06.000 Let me touch it.

01:23:09.000 Interstitial eight motherfucking times.

01:23:11.000 These are people that are angry at you, Ryan, last night for playing thanks for calling on a...

01:23:17.000 That's true.

01:23:18.000 And you just fucked up as we did that.

01:23:19.000 That's correct.

01:23:20.000 And I'm sorry.

01:23:21.000 And it will never happen again.

01:23:22.000 Please, for the love of God, stop with the Collins.

01:23:24.000 They're not funny.

01:23:25.000 It's the worst part of the week.

01:23:26.000 I love y'all, but suck.

01:23:28.000 You suck worse than, spelled wrong.

01:23:31.000 My ex's heels, spelled wrong, and sunglasses.

01:23:34.000 You're illiterate, Daniel.

01:23:37.000 And no, we cannot stop the Collins.

01:23:39.000 It's one hour a week of a two-hour show, 2468, right?

01:23:46.000 Let's say it's six hours a week.

01:23:48.000 So one-sixth of this show is Collins, and we want to get in touch with the baby monsters.

01:23:53.000 We want to hear something.

01:23:55.000 What if all our calls were like, please stop talking about racism?

01:23:59.000 We all hate it.

01:24:00.000 We're done.

01:24:01.000 We go, okay, I guess we should take it easy on the race.

01:24:04.000 Come on, man, Mikey!

01:24:09.000 Here's a pic of the George Floyd lawyer you were looking for yesterday.

01:24:11.000 He's now representing the families of Astro World.

01:24:15.000 Jesus, that guy's getting around.

01:24:19.000 And getting good at getting around, if you will.

01:24:21.000 Paisley Ty.

01:24:22.000 So what's his name?

01:24:23.000 Is he Ben Crump?

01:24:24.000 Ben Crump, yeah.

01:24:25.000 Look him up.

01:24:26.000 He's got pictures on bus stops, you know, those bus stop ads.

01:24:30.000 Dude, we got to get him on the show and then talk about the bald eagle.

01:24:35.000 Oh my God.

01:24:37.000 And if we can get him to say, we understand the concept of bald eagles are on the endangered list, but black males are not.

01:24:46.000 But it was frustrating watching Felonius Floyd say that because he said the bird witch is.

01:24:51.000 Ben, how did you feel when he said the bird witch is instead of just saying the bald eagle?

01:24:56.000 And if we could get him to just go, I don't care what he does, actually.

01:24:59.000 Would it be great if he just went, yeah, it was, I mean, we've gone through that many, many times.

01:25:06.000 And then we could play the clip.

01:25:08.000 We go, here we have your face when he said it.

01:25:11.000 There he is, Ben Crump.

01:25:13.000 Calling me to get justice for your personal injury, Ben Crump.

01:25:16.000 You know what?

01:25:17.000 I guarantee if I give him a thousand bucks, he'll come on the show.

01:25:21.000 Think so?

01:25:22.000 Absolutely.

01:25:24.000 He'd come on KKK TV.

01:25:27.000 There we go.

01:25:27.000 We got his number.

01:25:29.000 Napole Crump.

01:25:31.000 Fellow conservative dude Biff Lawson sent this to me.

01:25:35.000 Good guy.

01:25:36.000 Isn't it weird how he's the black lawyer?

01:25:39.000 It's hard to believe we're in a country of 331 million people when we have one black lawyer.

01:25:45.000 Like he's handling every case.

01:25:47.000 It's like we're in a little town in England called Hertfordshire.

01:25:53.000 You have Hertfordshire to me today.

01:25:55.000 I just want to say that Ryan's intro had me dying with laughter.

01:25:59.000 Perfect amount of flair and cringe.

01:26:01.000 Hmm.

01:26:02.000 Wait, what?

01:26:03.000 Cringe.

01:26:06.000 See attached for the video, which is the attachment.

01:26:10.000 Okay, there's one.

01:26:11.000 And we have Kyle Rittenhouse.

01:26:16.000 Let me fuck you with my heels on, yeah.

01:26:21.000 The bird, which is the bald eagle, crossing state lines.

01:26:24.000 We have people here happy about your Jesse Lee Peterson imitation.

01:26:27.000 Ah.

01:26:28.000 Jesse Lee Deterson.

01:26:29.000 Sentient definition.

01:26:30.000 Please look it up and stop saying women are sentient beings.

01:26:35.000 Okay, let's look up sentient.

01:26:37.000 A computer.

01:26:38.000 Computer, what does sentient mean?

01:26:43.000 As an adjective, sentient is usually defined as having the power of perception by the senses, conscious.

01:26:50.000 As a noun, sentient is usually defined as a person or thing that is sentient.

01:26:55.000 For more, ask me to give you more definitions for sentient.

01:27:00.000 Okay, that doesn't sound like I'm right.

01:27:03.000 And I'm pronouncing it wrong.

01:27:04.000 Sentient.

01:27:05.000 It sounds like you're right, but redundant.

01:27:08.000 Responsive or responsive to or conscious of sense impressions.

01:27:15.000 So it means sentient.

01:27:18.000 Okay, I'll stop saying it.

01:27:19.000 You win.

01:27:21.000 You won this round.

01:27:22.000 Hey guys, the white guy in the Veterans Day, Google Doodle, is missing an arm because he's the only one that actually saw combat.

01:27:27.000 He had to bear the brunt of it, if you will.

01:27:29.000 I thought that yesterday.

01:27:31.000 Everyone else had some sort of bullshit Pete butt plug role in the military.

01:27:37.000 I like how Pete Buttplug was put into the political sphere so Trump would say something homophobic, and he didn't.

01:27:44.000 He said Alfred E. Newman, but we are all too eager to jump on board and take the bait.

01:27:53.000 Gavin's ideal automobile.

01:27:56.000 This is nice, dude.

01:27:57.000 This is nice.

01:27:58.000 They literally stole your idea.

01:28:01.000 This is gorgeous.

01:28:02.000 The interior, the...

01:28:04.000 Look at that.

01:28:06.000 Yeah, see, I'm not looking for a fancy brand name like BMW or JAG.

01:28:10.000 I'll take a Hyundai.

01:28:12.000 That is a fucking beautiful car, sir.

01:28:14.000 I would Hyundai for this car.

01:28:16.000 Wait a minute.

01:28:18.000 That was at 9.54 a.m.

01:28:20.000 At 9.02 a.m.

01:28:22.000 We have Retro Hyundai Heritage.

01:28:25.000 Hey, Gavin and new dad fag.

01:28:27.000 Totally different email.

01:28:28.000 An hour earlier today.

01:28:30.000 I assume 50 people will send you this, but in case I'm wrong, have you seen the Hyundai Heritage car?

01:28:37.000 Isn't that weird?

01:28:40.000 Well, maybe they had just released.

01:28:42.000 I think this was just released because somebody also 10.44 a.m.

01:28:47.000 November 10th.

01:28:48.000 Yeah, yeah.

01:28:49.000 But that came out two days ago.

01:28:51.000 Restamont treatment elevates 1980s Hyundai Grander to a new level.

01:28:55.000 To follow up the pony from earlier this year, Hyundai reached into its past once again and turned this boxy sedan into a retro fusion.

01:29:01.000 Wait, so this is for sale now as a 2021 car?

01:29:04.000 I heard this was a concept, but that's awesome if they did, although it probably means it's fucking 40 or 50 grand.

01:29:14.000 Yeah.

01:29:15.000 Yuck, yuck.

01:29:16.000 So that could start a trend.

01:29:17.000 The most important thing about that is if there's more demand, there's more supply.

01:29:21.000 Yeah, folks, if you're watching this, please buy this car.

01:29:24.000 Yes.

01:29:25.000 Let's increase the demand.

01:29:28.000 We are now promoting Hyundai.

01:29:31.000 Okay, last one, it's called Black Savior.

01:29:34.000 And it says, have you noticed?

01:29:39.000 Similar ads.

01:29:40.000 Coincidence?

01:29:41.000 Stay has been AIDS this year.

01:29:45.000 Kenny Hotz.

01:29:46.000 This is Kenny Hotz's.

01:29:54.000 Just the ad?

01:29:55.000 Blah, blah, blah.

01:29:56.000 Keep going.

01:30:00.000 Wait, this is a full episode?

01:30:02.000 An hour 22.

01:30:02.000 So what's the...

01:30:03.000 So what are you sending me this for?

01:30:06.000 And why didn't Kenny call me when he was in?

01:30:08.000 He doesn't have a crane.

01:30:10.000 Okay, now go through the next one.

01:30:12.000 Hey, Jen.

01:30:13.000 Is your family down for Christmas?

01:30:15.000 Probably just me this year.

01:30:28.000 Come on, it's a tradition.

01:30:38.000 Give more than I can kill next year.

01:30:41.000 Etsy.

01:30:43.000 Hey, buddy.

01:30:44.000 That was annoying.

01:30:45.000 That put me in a bad mood.

01:30:46.000 More good news.

01:30:49.000 Ooh.

01:30:50.000 Electric concept.

01:30:51.000 Look at that fucking thing.

01:30:55.000 That is attractive.

01:30:57.000 Sure is.

01:30:57.000 That's fucking Fonzie style.

01:30:59.000 Yeah.

01:31:00.000 That's all I've been asking for.

01:31:02.000 It's electric, though.

01:31:03.000 I can take it.

01:31:04.000 It's electric.

01:31:05.000 I'm not against electric cars.

01:31:06.000 That's kind of cool.

01:31:07.000 Yeah.

01:31:08.000 Look at the plaid.

01:31:10.000 Oh, hi.

01:31:11.000 Plaid.

01:31:12.000 Can you see the plaid trim?

01:31:13.000 The bottom?

01:31:15.000 It's not plaid.

01:31:16.000 That's an orange stripe.

01:31:17.000 How about that?

01:31:19.000 I can't really see it.

01:31:20.000 Enhance.

01:31:23.000 Put some tart in there for you.

01:31:25.000 Just a checkerboard.

01:31:27.000 Alright, let's get to the final video.

01:31:30.000 Actually, now that I check all the email, we have a million emails about the Hyundai.

01:31:34.000 Okay.

01:31:36.000 Final video?

01:31:52.000 This one goes out to everyone who works or owns or has access to a pizza place.

01:32:00.000 We are in a global crisis right now.

01:32:03.000 Climate change is gripping the nation, gripping the planet.

01:32:07.000 And this clear-cutting in every major forest in the world in order to satiate our endless need for paper, for cardboard, for specifically pizza boxes.

01:32:19.000 And I want you to know if you're watching right now that if you throw out pizza boxes that are not used, if I catch you throwing out perfectly good pizza boxes, we will send one of our intrepid activists to your pizza place in order to publicly shame you on Facebook Live.

01:32:37.000 So do not, I repeat, do not throw out cardboard before it's time or you'll face this rat.

01:32:45.000 We have one Mother Earth, right?

01:32:46.000 We have one Mother Earth.

01:32:47.000 You get it, right?

01:32:48.000 One Mother Earth.

01:32:49.000 One Mother Earth, take care of it.

01:32:51.000 I'm going to scratch it on my motherfucking deserts.

01:32:54.000 I'm sure you're not.

01:32:54.000 I'm having a fucking night.

01:32:56.000 I'm going to send this to your fucking manager.

01:32:57.000 You're fucking a man.

01:32:59.000 I'll get him.

01:33:00.000 Yes, don't worry.

01:33:01.000 Take your manager.

01:33:02.000 Let's go.

01:33:03.000 Hey, Justin, Justin.

01:33:04.000 We'll make you get your manager.

01:33:05.000 Let's go.

01:33:06.000 Let's fucking go.

01:33:08.000 Justin, let's go.

01:33:11.000 I don't care about the title.

01:33:12.000 Let's go.

01:33:13.000 Mikey.

01:33:14.000 I'm sorry about you, Justin.

01:33:15.000 You're employing the balls off.

01:33:17.000 You're trying to save the climate.

01:33:19.000 Don't worry, I'm recording.

01:33:21.000 I'm recording this whole fucking time.

01:33:22.000 I'm recording Facebook Live.

01:33:24.000 Facebook Live, bitch!

01:33:25.000 Who cares?

01:33:26.000 Gooey!

01:33:27.000 Facebook Live!

01:33:29.000 Facebook Live, bitch!

01:33:32.000 Facebook Live!

01:33:32.000 I'm gonna put you on Facebook Live.

01:33:38.000 Is that Jesse from fucking Breaking Bad?

01:33:41.000 We've went Earth!

01:33:42.000 We won't fucking plan it!

01:33:43.000 You don't give a shit about it!

01:33:45.000 We want fucking Earth!

01:33:47.000 Respect it, bitch!

01:33:48.000 It houses you!

01:33:49.000 It homes you!

01:33:51.000 It wants to make sure you're good!

01:33:52.000 You don't give a shit!

01:33:55.000 No, no words!

01:33:56.000 Have a good fucking night, bitch!

01:33:59.000 Thank you, Ellie.

01:34:01.000 Bitch!

01:34:02.000 I like how she's using woman as an insult.

01:34:04.000 You're me, bitch.

01:34:08.000 That's the show.

01:34:09.000 Thank you for coming aboard.

01:34:10.000 We're very happy to have Ryan back.

01:34:12.000 Everything is back to normal and enhanced.

01:34:15.000 We have a new baby in the family, a little Buddha named Daphne.

01:34:22.000 Until we see you on Monday, get fired, get in trouble, be brave, and never stop fighting.

Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - November 12, 2021

S04E53 - SHITTY TITS

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