Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - S04E70 - INTO THE SPIDER-VERSE

00:00:13.000 Live from New York, it's Get Off My One with Kevin McGuinness.

00:01:42.000 I lost my favorite pen in all the hullabaloo.

00:01:54.000 Can't trip, gotta get into something.

00:01:56.000 What'd you say?

00:01:57.000 Can't sleep?

00:02:01.000 Can't sleep, gotta get into something.

00:02:03.000 That's been my problem the past few nights.

00:02:04.000 I don't get hungover anymore.

00:02:06.000 I wake up in the middle of the night, and then I can't get back to sleep.

00:02:12.000 And when I wake up, I'm woke up.

00:02:15.000 Like woke.

00:02:16.000 Like AOC woke.

00:02:18.000 Could start the day.

00:02:20.000 Like you closing your eyes right now, that kind of woke.

00:02:24.000 And then it takes hours, hours to get back to sleep.

00:02:29.000 You know Steve Bannon was on Jack Pesobic's podcast?

00:02:32.000 Whoa, stop.

00:02:35.000 Why are you wearing dolls clothes?

00:02:38.000 I got huge.

00:02:40.000 Stand up.

00:02:41.000 For what I believe in.

00:02:49.000 You look like a lumberjack balloon.

00:02:54.000 Dude, your shirt's garbage.

00:02:57.000 This is what I'm talking about.

00:02:58.000 New Year, same old crap.

00:03:00.000 Your shirt doesn't fit.

00:03:02.000 You're blurry.

00:03:03.000 Yeah, correct?

00:03:05.000 Your Honor, is that for the prosecution or the defense?

00:03:08.000 Because that's what I'm screaming.

00:03:10.000 I stand.

00:03:11.000 Oh, I got to get you a gavel. 0.83

00:03:12.000 Oh, yeah.

00:03:13.000 Put that on your to-do list.

00:03:14.000 We decided Ryan needs to work more hours here.

00:03:18.000 Yeah, dude, you got to accept it.

00:03:20.000 Like, say you put on a sock and there's a hole in your toe that's like the size of an eyelash.

00:03:27.000 There's not.

00:03:29.000 Yeah, no, no.

00:03:30.000 We got.

00:03:31.000 I can't believe you wear Timberlands as an adult.

00:03:33.000 I got them for Christmas, and I'm very happy about that.

00:03:36.000 They're Puerto Rican garbage. 1.00

00:03:39.000 Black garbage. 1.00

00:03:41.000 Yeah, okay.

00:03:43.000 Okay, worse.

00:03:44.000 Just worse.

00:03:46.000 Just getting Puerto Ricans are worse. 1.00

00:03:48.000 In fact, to prove we're not racist, that guy Gary Clark Jr. that did the opening song is a black and African-American person of color.

00:03:56.000 But yeah, are you wearing Timberlands as a joke?

00:03:59.000 No, they're awesome.

00:04:00.000 I've always wanted them, and my wife got them for me for Christmas.

00:04:05.000 What's funny about that?

00:04:06.000 So yeah, so I don't give a, I'm not talking literally about your actual sock on your foot right now.

00:04:12.000 I'm saying generally, like when you, the second you see a hole in your sock, go, gotta go, out.

00:04:17.000 You're a very sock-sensitive person.

00:04:19.000 Like when it comes to the soakers, throw your shoes away.

00:04:23.000 Put your feet in the garbage.

00:04:25.000 When it comes to like a hole in your socks.

00:04:26.000 No, but you get a soaker, you're fucked. 0.93

00:04:28.000 Like I was watching this movie last night with the family hunting the wild of people.

00:04:33.000 It's Taiki Wakakupi Shasha.

00:04:36.000 You know, that Maori Jew that everyone loves.

00:04:39.000 It's pretty funny.

00:04:40.000 But it's about this Maori kid, I guess, who gets adopted.

00:04:45.000 And then the mom dies, and the grumpy stepdad is the one who has to look after him.

00:04:50.000 Of course, they become friends.

00:04:53.000 But in it, there's a scene where they're walking through a river.

00:04:57.000 And you're like, well, now you're fucked. 0.96

00:05:00.000 You have to have a fire.

00:05:02.000 You have to make logs that can support your shoes.

00:05:05.000 And you're going to have to cook your feet, your shoes, for like, I don't know, four or five hours.

00:05:12.000 True.

00:05:13.000 In the heat.

00:05:15.000 I do have a sock with a hole in it, and it ruins my day because then you feel the shoe.

00:05:20.000 It's just garbage.

00:05:21.000 Like when I offered you my blue couch and you go, no, I have this couch.

00:05:25.000 And you had your weird IKEA garbage couch.

00:05:27.000 Do you still have that fucking couch?

00:05:29.000 Yes.

00:05:30.000 That's got like the blankets on it are the same blankets you use when you're moving.

00:05:35.000 Those quilted gray garbage blankets you put on a TV.

00:05:38.000 The IKEA, like low rubber.

00:05:41.000 So you said no, because you go, no, I don't need a couch.

00:05:44.000 I have this couch.

00:05:45.000 I built this couch.

00:05:46.000 No, you assembled the couch and you gave up like a $3,000 designer couch.

00:05:51.000 Let's be honest.

00:05:52.000 Was there any urination on that whatsoever?

00:05:55.000 No.

00:05:56.000 You lied.

00:05:57.000 No, I never pissed that couch.

00:05:59.000 Okay.

00:06:01.000 But going back to the sleep thing, did you hear about sleeping?

00:06:04.000 Urine isn't toxic waste.

00:06:06.000 You wash the outer cushion and it's just like, it was wet once.

00:06:11.000 Mabes.

00:06:13.000 But the sleep schedule thing.

00:06:15.000 This is the weirdest thing I wanted to do.

00:06:16.000 I know.

00:06:17.000 We have to get you to understand what garbage is.

00:06:20.000 I get it.

00:06:21.000 Like your room.

00:06:22.000 I don't know.

00:06:22.000 I haven't been to your, I haven't checked out your room since you got married, but back at your old place, you had like 17 People's entire wardrobes on the floor.

00:06:32.000 It's a nice room.

00:06:34.000 And, you know, did you throw out contractor bags full of clothes?

00:06:39.000 Yeah, literally did.

00:06:43.000 That shirt should go in the pile.

00:06:44.000 But no, donate it.

00:06:46.000 People will say, donate.

00:06:47.000 You know what?

00:06:48.000 Donations are fine.

00:06:49.000 Go look up fucking the Congo. 0.99

00:06:52.000 The war-torn Congo.

00:06:53.000 They're all wearing Nike and like St. Patrick's Day parade shirts.

00:06:57.000 We're fine for clothes.

00:06:59.000 Don't donate clothes.

00:07:01.000 As far as donating toys go, I guess at Christmas, if they're still in the box, sure, but that's just you buying toys.

00:07:07.000 But all like, people saw a bunch of Toy Story shit, like the stuff that Ryan keeps, in my garbage once.

00:07:14.000 I can't remember.

00:07:14.000 I posted on Instagram and I had a clear garbage bag and they're like, you're not donating those?

00:07:19.000 What?

00:07:19.000 No one wants an old woody.

00:07:23.000 Although my wife got an old woody this morning.

00:07:27.000 This is the apartment a couple of, maybe a week ago.

00:07:32.000 Okay.

00:07:33.000 So it's not the tidiest ever, but it's, you know, it's a nice area.

00:07:37.000 That's a little.

00:07:38.000 You should mount those guitars on the wall.

00:07:41.000 I was thinking that, but then I'm scared of anything falling on the baby, but also her knocking it down.

00:07:48.000 But she's more likely to knock it down when it's leaning against the wall, genius. 1.00

00:07:51.000 Oh, it's not leaning against the wall.

00:07:52.000 Those are on stands.

00:07:53.000 Okay.

00:07:53.000 But they're just bottom stands.

00:07:55.000 You can't see.

00:07:56.000 There's no like top brace.

00:07:57.000 So the baby, you're going to have to figure out something when she starts walking or crawling.

00:08:01.000 Yeah.

00:08:02.000 But the wall thing, maybe.

00:08:04.000 I was thinking about it.

00:08:06.000 Oh, we've got to find some studs. 1.00

00:08:07.000 But did you hear about the sleep schedule thing with Bannon?

00:08:11.000 You don't need to find studs for a guitar.

00:08:14.000 Guitar thing?

00:08:15.000 Okay.

00:08:16.000 All right.

00:08:17.000 Go ahead.

00:08:17.000 But yeah, Bannon was on Pessobic's podcast, and at the end of it, they're talking about how he sleeps, he doesn't sleep eight hours a night.

00:08:26.000 Most people don't that I know.

00:08:28.000 But he sleeps four hours, wakes up, reads like the Bible or something, and then goes back to sleep for another four hours.

00:08:34.000 And that's what people used to do.

00:08:36.000 Yeah, it was called second night.

00:08:38.000 Yeah.

00:08:39.000 Because before electricity, you'd go to bed crazy early, especially in New York in the winter.

00:08:44.000 It's dark at four.

00:08:45.000 You start going around six.

00:08:49.000 Around seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, you wake up at eleven and you're like, all right.

00:08:54.000 That's awesome.

00:08:55.000 So then you'd take a candle and go to your neighbor's house and have a beer.

00:09:00.000 That's the cool thing.

00:09:01.000 Because everyone was shit-faced in New York before they got water.

00:09:04.000 Kids were drinking beer.

00:09:05.000 It's the only liquid you could get where you wouldn't get dysentery.

00:09:09.000 So they'd be, kids would have, it wasn't very alcoholic, but kids were drinking beer.

00:09:14.000 Volunteers would come by.

00:09:15.000 You'd pay workers in whiskey. 0.59

00:09:17.000 Like everyone was hammered.

00:09:18.000 You can almost understand prohibition coming about when people were that shithammered.

00:09:26.000 But yeah, I think we're supposed to do that.

00:09:28.000 I think Howard Stern does that.

00:09:29.000 Right after he's done his shift, he goes into his office and has like a two-hour nap.

00:09:33.000 I hate naps.

00:09:34.000 They're gay. 0.99

00:09:36.000 When was sleeping invented?

00:09:38.000 Cool.

00:09:39.000 When was sleeping invented?

00:09:40.000 For as long as humans have roamed the earth, that's one of my biggest pet peeves, is when people say the oldest profession or since the beginning of time, we've had prostitution. 0.81

00:09:51.000 Yeah, I know, I figured that out too.

00:09:53.000 It's not rocket science.

00:09:54.000 Don't tell me we've had criminals for as long as we've had people.

00:09:59.000 Crime, the oldest profession.

00:10:01.000 Fuck off.

00:10:03.000 Since the beginning.

00:10:04.000 If you start any story with since the beginning of time or since man first roamed the earth, you're not a writer.

00:10:11.000 Don't write.

00:10:12.000 Stop.

00:10:15.000 Stop what you're doing.

00:10:17.000 They call it biphasic sleep.

00:10:21.000 Just like we're also apparently supposed to just nibble and snack.

00:10:27.000 Snack a nap.

00:10:29.000 So not sit down and have a big, huge meal, but like whenever you're hungry, have a few bites like the Spanish do with tapas. 0.50

00:10:37.000 My youngest boy has a new pal from Spain.

00:10:40.000 And we said, okay, he came over for a plate eight and he goes, okay, we'll bring him back around four.

00:10:45.000 And they go, we don't know time.

00:10:47.000 So just bring him back.

00:10:53.000 We don't know time.

00:10:54.000 Noon, 10 p.m.

00:10:55.000 It's not a big deal.

00:10:57.000 I like that attitude.

00:10:59.000 So it's 2022.

00:11:01.000 2022.

00:11:02.000 We're in the future.

00:11:05.000 And as someone recently pointed out, we're literally in the future.

00:11:09.000 The movie Zardaz took place in 2022.

00:11:14.000 I think it was January 1st or something, 2022.

00:11:18.000 Yeah.

00:11:20.000 That's Sean Connery.

00:11:21.000 Some dude was supposed to do Lord of the Rings and he fucked it up.

00:11:24.000 This is 1973.

00:11:26.000 And so he did a science fiction movie in Ireland of all places.

00:11:30.000 And that was Sean Connery's outfit in it.

00:11:32.000 This is back when men could be sexy and not have to manscape.

00:11:36.000 He's not hoverhanding at all.

00:11:38.000 No, he's digging into her rings.

00:11:41.000 She's going to bruise from that grab. 1.00

00:11:43.000 This is pre-hoverhand.

00:11:45.000 Oh, damn.

00:11:46.000 It's got some patches.

00:11:47.000 It's a weird movie.

00:11:49.000 I don't remember it very well, but I remember it's a matriarchy. 1.00

00:11:53.000 It's very pro-gun, good.

00:11:55.000 Very pro-women in control. 1.00

00:11:57.000 In fact, they had a motto, the gun is good, the penis is evil. 0.77

00:12:02.000 So they got it half right as far as what 2022 will be like.

00:12:05.000 The penis is definitely seen as evil.

00:12:07.000 I agree.

00:12:08.000 The penis is evil. 0.57

00:12:09.000 You know how much trouble that gotten us in?

00:12:11.000 That penis of ours?

00:12:12.000 I wasn't totally blown away with my guy's performance today.

00:12:16.000 It had been two weeks because my wife doesn't want to do it when the kids are around. 0.99

00:12:19.000 So obviously the kids have been around for two weeks.

00:12:21.000 So we finally had the house to ourselves this morning after school.

00:12:25.000 And I was...

00:12:27.000 If you were to watch it as a porn, I think you'd prefer watching Jack Murphy.

00:12:31.000 He's got a little more duration.

00:12:33.000 This would be...

00:12:34.000 And variety.

00:12:35.000 This porn could have been on TikTok.

00:12:39.000 It's a vine.

00:12:42.000 I do porn for vine.

00:12:45.000 And sometimes I just, you know, midway, I'm done.

00:12:48.000 So I just stare at the camera afterwards.

00:12:50.000 After I was done, I was going to say, well, that was short and sweet, but I thought, no.

00:12:54.000 Because the sweet part was.

00:12:55.000 And then I thought about making an explanation.

00:12:58.000 Like, look, it had been a long time, so maybe the next one's going to be awesome.

00:13:02.000 But then I thought, I'm not going to do that either.

00:13:05.000 You've got to always try to be attractive to your wife.

00:13:09.000 You got to always try to be you're courting her forever, as I keep saying.

00:13:13.000 And I thought she was in the kitchen, and I came back into the bedroom and she was making the bed.

00:13:17.000 I went, Oh, Jesus.

00:13:19.000 And she goes, What the fuck?

00:13:21.000 Like, disgusted.

00:13:23.000 And I was like, I'm not scared.

00:13:27.000 I'm just very high strung.

00:13:30.000 I mean, go have a home invasion. 0.74

00:13:32.000 I'm not going to be under the covers.

00:13:33.000 I'll be killing everyone.

00:13:35.000 I'll send you guys down to the basement.

00:13:37.000 I'll be murdering everyone who comes in the house.

00:13:39.000 Don't worry about that.

00:13:40.000 But part of that quick reaction time is being very tightly wound, and my legs are always bouncing.

00:13:47.000 It's not weakness.

00:13:49.000 Another thing women don't like, by the way, is allergies. 1.00

00:13:53.000 Oh, chew.

00:13:54.000 That's weakness.

00:13:55.000 Any kind of weakness.

00:13:56.000 Anytime my wife asks me if I'm okay, if I cough or something or hurt myself, I say I'm always okay.

00:14:04.000 Oh, that's good.

00:14:04.000 I'm literally, but it's true that I'm literally have learned so much from me.

00:14:08.000 I don't like to be worried about.

00:14:11.000 I don't know what it is.

00:14:12.000 Only child syndrome.

00:14:14.000 I don't know.

00:14:16.000 I don't know.

00:14:17.000 What?

00:14:18.000 No.

00:14:20.000 I told you the famous story, the story I keep going back to is we're on a Sansa flight from Costa Rica.

00:14:27.000 The turbulence is nuts.

00:14:28.000 And the Sansa planes there only have one engine.

00:14:31.000 So if you're going down, you're going down.

00:14:34.000 And she's crying and she's so scared.

00:14:36.000 And everyone in the plane is, oh, oh, oh.

00:14:38.000 And I'm sitting there going, it's an Airbus.

00:14:42.000 Okay.

00:14:43.000 Things are way more dangerous on the ground.

00:14:45.000 Way more bus accidents than plane accidents.

00:14:48.000 We're actually much safer here than we would be in a bus.

00:14:50.000 So it's a bus in a sense that it commutes a lot.

00:14:53.000 But as far as danger goes, this is much safer than a bus.

00:14:56.000 It's like, okay, okay.

00:14:58.000 Please don't let the kids become racist.

00:15:02.000 And then we landed and I was like, meanwhile, every time she was looking that way, I could look out the window and go, holy fuck, we're good.

00:15:12.000 Hey, calm down, babe. 0.98

00:15:14.000 We got this.

00:15:15.000 Meanwhile, I'm holding in enough farts to add jets to the plane.

00:15:21.000 I'm farting so intently, or I'm holding in such intense farts that I could have just stuck my ass out the window and propelled us home.

00:15:28.000 We got one more engine, pilot.

00:15:30.000 No, we don't.

00:15:30.000 It's Costa Rica.

00:15:32.000 Oh, yeah?

00:15:35.000 We're safe.

00:15:37.000 Plane crashes due to farts.

00:15:39.000 What's God doing in that situation?

00:15:42.000 God is listening carefully to see who prays on the plane.

00:15:45.000 So he's like, should I...

00:15:47.000 Oh, wait, someone's praying.

00:15:49.000 I like that he's considering it.

00:15:51.000 He's like, eh, fuck this plane.

00:15:53.000 Just bored.

00:15:54.000 Hasidic Jews are always fanatically praying with the Torah on every flight. 0.99

00:15:58.000 And I'm like, guys, you can't do that with prayers.

00:16:02.000 If it worked, I'd pray for the Mets and we'd have won the World Series since 1986.

00:16:09.000 Maybe somebody's praying against them really hard.

00:16:11.000 Maybe he's praying to die because there's so many fucking goyam on the plane. 1.00

00:16:17.000 I also saw Spider-Man.

00:16:19.000 Nice.

00:16:19.000 Because I have children.

00:16:20.000 Please don't spoil it.

00:16:22.000 Spider-Man dies.

00:16:24.000 Fuck.

00:16:27.000 Maybe.

00:16:28.000 Oh.

00:16:30.000 I'm so scared of what you're going to say, so please.

00:16:33.000 First of all, you're disgusting that you give a fuck about a hero, superhero movie.

00:16:38.000 I've invested all my life into Spider-Man.

00:16:40.000 He's been my favorite since forever.

00:16:42.000 So did my kid.

00:16:43.000 And then he turned nine and he moved on.

00:16:46.000 Yeah, but I'm still interested to see what they do with the brand and the franchise.

00:16:51.000 Well, the plot is that Spider-Man, they don't explain this at all.

00:16:58.000 The beginning of the movie is like, Spider-Man is responsible for that drone strike that killed all those people.

00:17:02.000 And me and my eight-year-old are like, what drone strike?

00:17:06.000 That's from the movie with Mysterio, the last one, Far From Home.

00:17:11.000 Okay, I guess I didn't see that one.

00:17:12.000 I thought I saw them all.

00:17:14.000 Is it the Tom Holland guy in Far From Home?

00:17:17.000 Yeah, same guy.

00:17:18.000 Okay, so.

00:17:19.000 So Mysterio, played by Jake Gyllenhal, you know, he did a drone strike-y thing and blamed it on Spider-Man.

00:17:27.000 Who's Mysterio?

00:17:28.000 What does he look like?

00:17:29.000 He's got a big fishbowl on his head.

00:17:32.000 And he's green.

00:17:33.000 Okay, I definitely didn't see that one.

00:17:34.000 Okay, yeah, yeah.

00:17:34.000 So they all assume you've seen that one, which is gay.

00:17:40.000 And so Mysterio, as he dies or whatever he does, he goes, Spider-Man is Peter Parker.

00:17:46.000 And then everyone hates Peter Parker.

00:17:48.000 Kind of hit close to home, actually, because everyone was like, boo, when he walks down the street and filming him.

00:17:53.000 And his friends can't get into MIT.

00:17:57.000 Lots of spoilers here.

00:17:58.000 Because they're friends with him.

00:18:00.000 And I was like, been there, done that, seen my brother's career get flushed down the toilet.

00:18:06.000 Everyone gets fucked.

00:18:07.000 Isn't it funny, too, that Jack Murphy got fucked up the ass immediately after he appeared on my show?

00:18:13.000 Wait, figuratively?

00:18:15.000 Yes.

00:18:16.000 Okay.

00:18:17.000 He got his ass tongued many moons ago.

00:18:20.000 Right.

00:18:20.000 Moons.

00:18:21.000 Moons.

00:18:23.000 We're not making fun of you, Jack.

00:18:25.000 Yeah.

00:18:26.000 Well, we've already said our position on Jack Murphy, right?

00:18:28.000 Be Mexican. 0.97

00:18:30.000 I don't care that he has submissive sexual tendencies or ever did.

00:18:37.000 Ronnie the limo driver likes to get butt fucked with a strap on.

00:18:40.000 I think it's funny.

00:18:41.000 If I was into that, I would ask my wife to do it. 1.00

00:18:44.000 I don't think she would.

00:18:45.000 She's not into that.

00:18:47.000 But I don't fucking care about butt sex. 1.00

00:18:50.000 Now he said he used to fuck dudes or he used to cuck.

00:18:53.000 Okay, that's very weird, but I don't give a fuck.

00:18:56.000 And I think you can still be lead a men's group if you've cucked.

00:19:01.000 Being a man is not really about your sexual habits, although cucking is not great.

00:19:06.000 But it's about being a man, getting married, having a baby, standing by your kids.

00:19:14.000 But he didn't handle it great, as we discussed already.

00:19:17.000 He did not do the Mexican.

00:19:18.000 And then people were like, he said he fucks boys.

00:19:20.000 Obviously, pedophile is a deal-breaker.

00:19:23.000 But I don't think he meant young boys.

00:19:25.000 He meant like college gentlemen.

00:19:30.000 Anyway, people keep saying, I don't know why you're dying on this hill.

00:19:32.000 I'm not dying.

00:19:33.000 I'm a very loyal friend.

00:19:35.000 I'm standing by him.

00:19:36.000 And I think he reacted to the situation really badly, telling Sidney Watson to go fuck herself.

00:19:42.000 He's kind of new to this machismo thing.

00:19:44.000 And I'm not willing to accept the term grifter from him about him.

00:19:50.000 Anyway, we've covered that.

00:19:51.000 So Spider-Man walks down the street.

00:19:54.000 That's where you're going.

00:19:55.000 So everything sucks for him.

00:19:57.000 And then he gets Doctor Strange.

00:20:00.000 He's fucking annoying this kid.

00:20:02.000 He gets Doctor Strange to make everyone forget that he's Spider-Man.

00:20:06.000 But then as the guy's doing the spell, he's like, wait, what about my aunt?

00:20:09.000 Wait, what about my girlfriend?

00:20:10.000 Wait, what about my friend?

00:20:11.000 And so he's fucking up the spell, and then he fucks up the whole world and brings in all these other universes into this universe.

00:20:17.000 So we see all the other Spider-Man.

00:20:19.000 We see Dr. Octagon, all the enemies of every other movie.

00:20:23.000 It kind of is smart because that was an annoying thing.

00:20:25.000 They kept having these new Spider-Mans.

00:20:28.000 And that now justifies it all.

00:20:30.000 So I don't think they did that on purpose, but it was smart.

00:20:33.000 But here's the exciting thing.

00:20:34.000 And by the way, don't see this movie if you're an adult with no kids.

00:20:38.000 That's for fucking losers.

00:20:41.000 Video games are for fucking losers.

00:20:45.000 Sorry, I know we just lost a thousand subs.

00:20:48.000 Grow the fuck up. 0.93

00:20:49.000 If you want to play a video game with your little kid, that's cool.

00:20:52.000 That's a fun way.

00:20:53.000 To fucking party.

00:20:55.000 I hate how this thing keeps slipping dune.

00:21:00.000 Maybe I can tuck it here.

00:21:02.000 Tuck-a-hoe. 1.00

00:21:04.000 When Spider-Man walks down the street, they do this to him instead of a Zeke Heil. 0.80

00:21:09.000 Some like him, some don't.

00:21:12.000 I found that part emotional because I've lived that life.

00:21:15.000 I lived that life.

00:21:18.000 And it was annoying that there was almost no kids in the theater.

00:21:21.000 Like, the couple next to me were in their late 30s on a date.

00:21:26.000 What?

00:21:27.000 And they're laughing at all the jokes that are for kids.

00:21:31.000 Anyway, I saw it in 4D.

00:21:35.000 Nice.

00:21:35.000 Which I can't go back now.

00:21:37.000 What do they have?

00:21:38.000 The wind and shit?

00:21:40.000 Dude, when he's going through the city, I'm on a chair.

00:21:44.000 We're part of four chairs.

00:21:46.000 They do it in groups of four where I'm swinging like this with him.

00:21:49.000 What?

00:21:50.000 And there's wind in my face.

00:21:52.000 I want to be a part of that.

00:21:55.000 They do it in the Bronx.

00:21:56.000 Cool.

00:21:58.000 And when he shoots a web, you get there's jets behind your ears where you're like, what the fuck?

00:22:04.000 And then there's a scene where Dr. Octagon has one of his things.

00:22:07.000 Octopus.

00:22:08.000 Whatever.

00:22:09.000 Has one of his things cut off.

00:22:10.000 Yeah.

00:22:11.000 And they have jets that...

00:22:12.000 It's probably not popular with people in the South Bronx because they're used to rats.

00:22:16.000 But the jets shoot at your ankles, these jets of air.

00:22:19.000 So I don't know why, but it feels like you just had one of your claws chopped off.

00:22:24.000 I hate when that happens.

00:22:26.000 Like the girl next to me, this black chick, was like, what the fuck's going on with my feet, yo? 1.00

00:22:29.000 My claws.

00:22:31.000 Because you worried it's water.

00:22:33.000 I don't want to be getting soakers. 1.00

00:22:37.000 What else?

00:22:38.000 Oh, yeah.

00:22:38.000 Here's the best part.

00:22:40.000 You can opt out for this if you're not into it.

00:22:42.000 I opted in.

00:22:43.000 Water.

00:22:44.000 There's some right there.

00:22:45.000 Actually, that scene, you get splashed.

00:22:48.000 Water splashes you.

00:22:49.000 What?

00:22:50.000 Not a ton?

00:22:51.000 Where does it come from?

00:22:52.000 See in front of you?

00:22:54.000 No, above.

00:22:56.000 So how do they isolate?

00:22:57.000 So somebody right next to you, if they opt out, or is it sections?

00:23:01.000 Like this section of water seats?

00:23:02.000 It's individual seats.

00:23:03.000 So I guess they try to aim it.

00:23:05.000 But there's a scene where, dude, that villain is Alex Jones.

00:23:08.000 Really?

00:23:09.000 It's the guy from the drum movie.

00:23:11.000 He's always the editor of the Daily Bugle, whatever, with the other Spider-Man movies.

00:23:16.000 Peter Parker.

00:23:17.000 That guy?

00:23:18.000 Jameson, yeah.

00:23:21.000 They made him into an Alex Jones guy who does dailybugle.net.

00:23:24.000 He sells supplements.

00:23:25.000 I'm meaning to text Alex Jones and being like, dude, you're a villain in a movie.

00:23:29.000 I mean, I made it into a panel of Aquaman, but you're in fucking Spider-Man, the multiverse.

00:23:35.000 Dude, he was in King Kong in Godzilla.

00:23:37.000 The black guy, he had a secret radio show, and he was like...

00:23:42.000 Oh, yeah.

00:23:43.000 But it was a positive evil.

00:23:44.000 Yeah, maybe that's possible.

00:23:46.000 Yeah.

00:23:47.000 I mean, this was much more obvious than that.

00:23:49.000 This had the graphics, like the Cyber Earth.

00:23:52.000 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, like his studio?

00:23:54.000 Yeah, it was no.

00:23:55.000 And he sells supplements, so there's zero doubt.

00:23:58.000 Anyway, there's a scene where that Alex Jones guy is like, that fucking Spider-Man sucks ass.

00:24:03.000 He should be raped in the cunt. 1.00

00:24:04.000 The language is really bad in this movie.

00:24:06.000 The kids were freaking out.

00:24:09.000 And it's raining, and Spider-Man's all bummed out because someone died.

00:24:13.000 I won't say whom.

00:24:14.000 Thank you.

00:24:15.000 Don't say whom as a word.

00:24:17.000 Just say who.

00:24:17.000 Whom is extinct.

00:24:19.000 And he's getting rained on.

00:24:21.000 You're getting rained on.

00:24:22.000 That's awesome.

00:24:23.000 It's fucking...

00:24:24.000 Are you drenched or just a little bit?

00:24:25.000 No, no, no.

00:24:27.000 Okay, cool.

00:24:28.000 Imagine it's just a dude up there spitting.

00:24:30.000 But there were some moments where I'm looking at my little boy and I'm like, is this too intense?

00:24:33.000 Like, sometimes I take him on rides and I go, oh, fuck, this was a bad move.

00:24:36.000 Because I look back and he's going.

00:24:39.000 And I was worried that it was too intense for him.

00:24:42.000 So that's how good it is.

00:24:44.000 Damn.

00:24:45.000 I might go see Scream. 1.00

00:24:46.000 Scream is coming out in 4D.

00:24:48.000 Oh, yeah.

00:24:48.000 Hell yeah.

00:24:49.000 Maybe have a little edible.

00:24:51.000 Yay.

00:24:52.000 Who spooky spaghetti and tomato sauce?

00:24:55.000 We just got a babysitter, so movies will be a thing soon.

00:24:58.000 Why didn't you ask my daughter to babysit? 1.00

00:25:01.000 Oh, yeah, we could.

00:25:02.000 Yeah.

00:25:04.000 Or me.

00:25:04.000 It's my goddamn.

00:25:05.000 Just brace the neck and feed the bottles.

00:25:09.000 I saw a video of a little black kid today, seven hours old, with his head up.

00:25:14.000 Wow.

00:25:17.000 That would freak me out.

00:25:19.000 We got an alien.

00:25:22.000 Our baby just started doing that.

00:25:24.000 I know, your baby sucks.

00:25:26.000 No, she's advanced. 0.97

00:25:27.000 She was like, I didn't want to.

00:25:28.000 So she's got, like, motives.

00:25:31.000 Oh, you know why she lifted her head?

00:25:33.000 Because the doctor said, it's been so long.

00:25:35.000 I'm not sure she's going to be able to lift her head before any other baby.

00:25:39.000 And that's when Daphne went, what the fuck you say? 0.98

00:25:43.000 Oh, nothing.

00:25:45.000 Yeah, I thought so.

00:25:47.000 Jerry back down.

00:25:50.000 I'm going to try keeping these shows a little shorter.

00:25:52.000 I think two hours is too much gav for anyone.

00:25:57.000 But there's a lot of important news items here.

00:26:01.000 Like, I thought this was so awesome.

00:26:03.000 Montreal was told they couldn't party on New Year's Eve, right?

00:26:07.000 And that was a real fuck you. 0.59

00:26:08.000 Naples, you're seeing a lot of politicians just be like, uh, you have to wear a mask on Saturdays.

00:26:17.000 And no kissing.

00:26:19.000 Yeah, it's Revenge of the Nerds.

00:26:20.000 So the mayor of Naples, is that the same as Napoli?

00:26:24.000 He goes, yeah, no fireworks tonight.

00:26:29.000 Yeah, no fireworks.

00:26:30.000 So look at this.

00:26:31.000 This is on Tommy Robinson's Getter.

00:26:34.000 This was Naples the night that the mayor told them no fucking fireworks.

00:26:39.000 Look at that.

00:26:40.000 Turn it up.

00:26:41.000 You got to hear it.

00:26:43.000 Turn it up.

00:26:45.000 Bring the noise.

00:26:47.000 Now, full screen.

00:26:49.000 Work with me here.

00:26:51.000 Is there any volume?

00:26:52.000 No.

00:26:53.000 Really?

00:26:55.000 There is.

00:26:57.000 Look at that.

00:26:59.000 That is 100% of the resonance.

00:27:05.000 Is that such a beautiful fuck you back to the establishment? 1.00

00:27:09.000 Like, can you get a tattoo of that video?

00:27:13.000 It's so perfect.

00:27:15.000 No fireworks for you.

00:27:17.000 No, fuckface. 1.00

00:27:18.000 You work for us.

00:27:22.000 They didn't chintz on it either. 0.99

00:27:24.000 I got to send you this.

00:27:25.000 My buddy sent me a firework box from...

00:27:34.000 You know the place in Matamoros?

00:27:37.000 Is it Matamoros?

00:27:38.000 Yeah.

00:27:39.000 Phantom?

00:27:40.000 Yep.

00:27:41.000 It's called the Grounds for Divorce.

00:27:47.000 I'm going to just text it to you.

00:27:48.000 That's easier.

00:27:53.000 Me and this guy, Curtis, we used to go, $800 is two for one.

00:27:58.000 So we would both go in $400, and then we're at $8, and now we have $1,600 of fireworks, which is way too much.

00:28:05.000 That's the one I remember I blew my hand off?

00:28:07.000 Oh, yeah.

00:28:08.000 That's $1,500.

00:28:10.000 Is it $1,500 or $1,700?

00:28:14.000 Sorry, two grand.

00:28:16.000 That's $2,000, which is fuck.

00:28:18.000 That's bullshit.

00:28:20.000 What a fucking jip.

00:28:22.000 There's no way that's two grand's worth of fireworks.

00:28:25.000 And with the scam I just told you, with the $400, I spend $400, he spends $400, you get way more than that.

00:28:33.000 You get more than you can handle.

00:28:36.000 You can't handle the fireworks.

00:28:39.000 I thought we'd include a picture of Elliot Page and her dog looking fucking weird.

00:28:47.000 The testosterone starts to change your face after a while.

00:28:51.000 And she's getting a man's face now. 1.00

00:28:53.000 She's winning the war with her body.

00:28:56.000 She cut her tits off. 1.00

00:28:57.000 If I was her body, I'd be like, fuck this bitch. 1.00

00:29:00.000 I hate her guts.

00:29:02.000 Radiates joy.

00:29:03.000 How is that radiating joy?

00:29:06.000 Little fucking tiny laugh lines?

00:29:09.000 She's turning into a dude. 1.00

00:29:11.000 This dude.

00:29:12.000 The guy who played Ezra Miller.

00:29:16.000 I mean, you must start regretting it.

00:29:19.000 Look at all these sad boys.

00:29:22.000 Is that the new look?

00:29:24.000 I don't know.

00:29:24.000 It's weird.

00:29:25.000 The new look with the kids today, my eldest boy is into this.

00:29:29.000 They all wear sweatpants, a sweatshirt, and their bangs are as big as a bush.

00:29:36.000 They almost hang over their eyes.

00:29:37.000 It's just this huge bang.

00:29:40.000 I'm like, you're a fucking e-boy. 1.00

00:29:43.000 Yeah, it's the fuckboy haircut.

00:29:47.000 They're into their jawlines.

00:29:48.000 It's embarrassing.

00:29:50.000 And then here's another woman and her dog, 1-7.

00:29:55.000 Cute little chick. 1.00

00:29:56.000 I hope she's single. 0.89

00:29:59.000 Oh, wow.

00:29:59.000 She's pretty cute.

00:30:00.000 Let me pull this up.

00:30:01.000 She's adorable.

00:30:02.000 I don't know who's cuter, her or her little doggie. 0.94

00:30:06.000 That's tough.

00:30:08.000 She's... 1.00

00:30:09.000 Now, the problem with that kind of chick is they're very attractive when they're young, but it's baby fat. 1.00

00:30:16.000 Like, they have that cheerleader look.

00:30:18.000 And they don't often age well, you know?

00:30:21.000 Like, you know, the chick in being John Malkovich?

00:30:30.000 Yes.

00:30:31.000 She's aged well.

00:30:32.000 Like, she's got the jaw and the cheekbones, so she'll still be very attractive at 60. 1.00

00:30:37.000 Even 70, you don't want to fuck her, but she'll age in an elegant way. 1.00

00:30:41.000 A lot of these cute little bimbo chicks, like that one with the doggie, they sort of get... 1.00

00:30:48.000 Although Goldie Han was a cute little bimbo, and she didn't age bad, but then she had those big eyes. 1.00

00:30:55.000 So we'll see how this little sweetie ages.

00:30:57.000 I'm not optimistic.

00:31:00.000 Is it this one, right?

00:31:02.000 Yeah.

00:31:02.000 What's her name again?

00:31:04.000 I'll find out.

00:31:05.000 She's even got a cool, sexy name. 0.88

00:31:07.000 She looks a little Native American-ish.

00:31:09.000 Yeah.

00:31:10.000 And the eyes and the high-ass cheekbones, very Pocahontian. 0.96

00:31:14.000 That was a great article in the Post this week in the Pretendians.

00:31:18.000 And it was all about these white women who pretend they're Indians. 1.00

00:31:22.000 Katherine Keener.

00:31:24.000 I'm keen for Katherine.

00:31:27.000 Doesn't she look great? 0.94

00:31:28.000 That's the kind of woman that's almost a Benjamin Buttons babe, where they get hotter as they get older. 1.00

00:31:35.000 When she's in a movie with Fred Armison.

00:31:39.000 Loading ad.

00:31:40.000 By the way, Jared Holt, speaking of pretendians, he gives LARPers like me a bad name by wearing Carhartt?

00:31:47.000 Dude, bad news.

00:31:48.000 Everyone wears Carhartt.

00:31:50.000 That's true.

00:31:51.000 Everyone.

00:31:52.000 I saw some old Chinese lady wearing it today. 1.00

00:31:54.000 Oh, really?

00:31:54.000 Yeah, it's like the new Levi's.

00:31:56.000 It's embarrassing, actually.

00:31:58.000 I'm a blue-collar LARPer, and you haven't heard of the shit I wear.

00:32:01.000 Like Grease Point.

00:32:03.000 Yeah, no, I haven't.

00:32:03.000 I'm so blue-collar LARPer, if I could afford a Canadian goose, I wouldn't get it because it doesn't fit my Steez.

00:32:11.000 Carnhart's not blue-collar LARP.

00:32:13.000 You're LARPing as a LARPer.

00:32:15.000 That's what I'm saying.

00:32:16.000 He's LARPing, but he's LARP as a LARP.

00:32:17.000 We call you guys LARPosers. 0.99

00:32:20.000 That hurts.

00:32:21.000 But he's LARPing.

00:32:22.000 My pants are made of wax.

00:32:24.000 My pants are wax.

00:32:25.000 They come with wax.

00:32:26.000 They call you Gavin Wax.

00:32:27.000 He's suing you.

00:32:29.000 Isabella Riley's interested in you now.

00:32:32.000 My denim pants are so thick that when I walk around in my house, you hear like as it folds and bends.

00:32:43.000 It sounds like cardboard, and it feels like cardboard.

00:32:45.000 It's very painful.

00:32:47.000 My clothes are remarkably uncomfortable.

00:32:50.000 My friend Neat Dreams got raw denim.

00:32:52.000 Have you heard of this raw denim?

00:32:53.000 That's what I'm talking about.

00:32:55.000 Yeah.

00:32:55.000 It's from Japan.

00:32:56.000 And when you see it in person, you're like, damn, that's sick.

00:33:00.000 Yeah, when you see me in person.

00:33:02.000 Or anybody wearing them.

00:33:04.000 Like, I'm talking about my pants.

00:33:06.000 You describe the exact same pants, and then you say, when I see the people wearing them, I'm like, that's sick.

00:33:11.000 Like, what?

00:33:12.000 Dad, you don't know how to have a conversation.

00:33:14.000 I guess when I see the pants.

00:33:16.000 Oh, yeah.

00:33:16.000 You ever seen those Ferraris?

00:33:17.000 Yeah, I have one.

00:33:18.000 Oh, man.

00:33:19.000 When I see this, my buddy and a Ferrari, I'm like, cool, car.

00:33:23.000 What?

00:33:24.000 Well, the unwaxed I like more.

00:33:27.000 I'm talking about two different pants, genius. 0.95

00:33:30.000 So you have waxed and raw.

00:33:32.000 No one has waxed denim.

00:33:35.000 There's the wax pants that were gross point, I believe.

00:33:38.000 And then there were the denims that were in a totally different company.

00:33:45.000 There's wax denim.

00:33:48.000 Oh, those look like gay leather pants.

00:33:51.000 Here, let me tell you these two brands, because I want the kids at home to be better than you.

00:33:58.000 Is it Grease Point?

00:34:02.000 That sounds familiar.

00:34:04.000 Yeah.

00:34:05.000 So, Grease Point is the denim.

00:34:11.000 And Red Cloud.

00:34:14.000 So those are the greasy, waxy pants.

00:34:17.000 No, no, sorry.

00:34:17.000 Those are the denim.

00:34:18.000 Those are the denims.

00:34:20.000 They're a little wider at the ankle than they appear in these.

00:34:23.000 But they're like $350.

00:34:25.000 And you can customize them to be exactly your size.

00:34:30.000 Those are looking kind of gay down the line. 0.91

00:34:31.000 I was choosing those ones at the top.

00:34:34.000 And they're as thick as cardboard.

00:34:35.000 Yeah, those middle ones.

00:34:37.000 And then the other, the wax pants, that's red clouds.

00:34:48.000 And if you don't have red clouds in Grease Point, then you're not a good fake working class guy. 0.52

00:34:54.000 It seems like you're a fake welder.

00:34:55.000 I'm more like a fake construction guy.

00:35:00.000 No, you're not, though.

00:35:02.000 You were wearing a child's shirt this morning.

00:35:05.000 Because I'm too big.

00:35:07.000 I don't have time to go shopping.

00:35:09.000 I'm so busy working my union job that doesn't exist.

00:35:14.000 There's a mafia guy at my gym who went to jail for a no-show.

00:35:20.000 You know, those jobs?

00:35:21.000 Yeah.

00:35:21.000 And the Sopranos where they just sit at a construction site?

00:35:24.000 Yep.

00:35:24.000 And the CO comes up to him and he goes, you know, you could get out a lot earlier if you got a job here and worked.

00:35:31.000 And he goes, I didn't fucking work out there.

00:35:33.000 Why would I work in here?

00:35:34.000 That's true.

00:35:36.000 Yeah, that's fucking true.

00:35:37.000 What am I going to get out by working?

00:35:38.000 Actually, that's not what he said.

00:35:40.000 He said, I didn't fucking work out there.

00:35:42.000 Why am I going to work in here?

00:35:45.000 He's got a bit of Coco Diaz in him.

00:35:47.000 What is this you're showing us?

00:35:48.000 Naked and famous denim.

00:35:52.000 This is some good stuff.

00:35:53.000 My eyes are on these.

00:35:56.000 Why wouldn't you get the ones that I have?

00:35:58.000 I got to find my own way.

00:36:00.000 You know, like this Friday the 13th.

00:36:06.000 I think I just had a stroke.

00:36:08.000 Cracking yourself up, are you?

00:36:11.000 Also in the news, I didn't go to the gym for two weeks, and I was much stiffer and hurt a lot more.

00:36:21.000 My ankle started going.

00:36:22.000 My knee, if I would kneel down too much and get up, my knee hurt.

00:36:25.000 I've got this pain on my shoulder blade.

00:36:27.000 I can't really lift my arm like, ow, ow, ow, that hurts, that hurts, that hurts.

00:36:31.000 This is no problem.

00:36:33.000 But this kills.

00:36:35.000 And that's from doing zero exercise.

00:36:37.000 Got nothing done.

00:36:38.000 Didn't fix barely anything in the house.

00:36:41.000 Didn't come in here.

00:36:42.000 Didn't work on my book.

00:36:43.000 Didn't do shit.

00:36:45.000 You had a little vacation.

00:36:47.000 Get some time off.

00:36:48.000 Relax.

00:36:48.000 I don't know.

00:36:49.000 I don't.

00:36:49.000 You got rained down with Spidey.

00:36:51.000 Yeah, that was one night.

00:36:53.000 This is, I don't know.

00:36:53.000 This working is more fun.

00:36:55.000 I don't like vacations.

00:36:56.000 Yeah, I do like doing stuff.

00:36:58.000 I'd rather work out, come here, do the show, try to make it better.

00:37:03.000 I was off from the gym since getting the tattoo because I didn't, you made fun of me for it, but I didn't want to push my tattoo.

00:37:10.000 Let's make sure that stays on the record in case people missed the previous episode or the episode where we discussed this.

00:37:15.000 Ryan got a ridiculous tattoo, the same one we all got, the bald eagle, on his thigh because he pussied out, right?

00:37:21.000 Because he didn't want it to be visual.

00:37:22.000 You look seen.

00:37:23.000 No, I looked at it.

00:37:24.000 It's on his thigh this big.

00:37:25.000 Excuse me, I'm talking.

00:37:26.000 He got it this big on his thigh, same size, but it's meant for an arm.

00:37:31.000 And then he doesn't go to the gym for three days because he doesn't want to get it sweaty.

00:37:34.000 It was more than three days.

00:37:35.000 It wound up being, I went to the gym, I think, two days ago for the first time.

00:37:40.000 But let me tell you something.

00:37:42.000 Yes.

00:37:42.000 When you reapproach, and I talked to a trainer about this, and since then I hadn't taken a break, but he was like, take a break every now and then.

00:37:48.000 I was like, yeah, fuck you.

00:37:50.000 And you are stronger if you have a smaller break.

00:37:55.000 You have more like in the reserves.

00:37:57.000 And I have my gains coming back more.

00:38:01.000 Because I don't know.

00:38:02.000 Something about that extended rest, my body was just not, you know, being exerted.

00:38:07.000 And I feel like I've gotten big gains just from those two days alone.

00:38:12.000 And I don't think you should work out after a tattoo.

00:38:14.000 Some scientists say, like this guy here, you know, you could do that.

00:38:18.000 Hold on.

00:38:18.000 Look at the size of that tattoo.

00:38:20.000 It's retarded. 1.00

00:38:21.000 So you've got a tiny little silly tattoo that you don't even...

00:38:24.000 Like that tattoo we got, you don't even put cream on or anything.

00:38:28.000 It's irrelevant.

00:38:28.000 It doesn't exist.

00:38:29.000 Ignore it.

00:38:30.000 These are small.

00:38:31.000 Okay, but that's just a random Getty image they stole.

00:38:37.000 I guess it says you can.

00:38:40.000 Shut up, Brian.

00:38:40.000 I just took a break.

00:38:41.000 Let me make something clear here.

00:38:42.000 We're making fun of you.

00:38:44.000 I don't like it.

00:38:45.000 So you coming up with articles, like everyone who watches this knows how ridiculous it is to not work out because you don't want to get a sweaty tattoo.

00:38:54.000 The end.

00:38:56.000 Also, very important news item from the weekend.

00:46:14.000 mean, she's just a real bitch, so I'm in good company. 1.00

00:46:18.000 I'm there by myself, mine.

00:46:20.000 I'm just a kid.

00:46:22.000 It's funny because people wanted me topless, but I said no.

00:46:26.000 It's so hard to tell.

00:46:30.000 Did you hear that?

00:46:31.000 Yeah.

00:46:32.000 You wanted me topless? 0.62

00:46:33.000 Oh, weren't you?

00:46:33.000 It's so hard to tell.

00:46:36.000 Anyway, just fucking damn.

00:46:37.000 Do you think women were funnier back then because they kept their mouths shut and listened to men all their life? 1.00

00:46:41.000 So then they were finally fucking funny?

00:46:44.000 No, I think that everyone was funnier back then.

00:46:48.000 People were more free.

00:46:50.000 That's what humor is.

00:46:52.000 Humor can only thrive when there's zero restrictions.

00:46:55.000 And that includes offending people, offending groups of people, being misinterpreted.

00:47:00.000 That's how humor works.

00:47:02.000 It's like music.

00:47:03.000 As soon as you constrain it, it sucks.

00:47:08.000 That's why Louie Louie was so popular.

00:47:09.000 It was the first time people heard unrestrained, sloppy music.

00:47:16.000 All right, according to our new business plan, we are coming to an end.

00:47:23.000 I would be remiss if I didn't mention that that Proud Boy story I mentioned before the holidays.

00:47:28.000 Are we going back that far?

00:47:30.000 Where I was accused of embezzling money was total horseshit.

00:47:33.000 I apologize to Harry Fox for accusing him of accusing me.

00:47:41.000 I should have looked into it and called him before I defended myself on the show.

00:47:45.000 He had never accused me of that.

00:47:47.000 And as far as the embezzling goes, instead of, and he didn't say that, but if anyone ever says that, talk to Max and John.

00:47:54.000 Talk to Zanoa.

00:47:55.000 Talk to Max's parents.

00:47:57.000 Find out.

00:47:58.000 Talk to the lawyers involved.

00:47:59.000 What are their names?

00:48:00.000 You don't know because you're not involved.

00:48:02.000 Another rumor I heard was I had been compromised and I was an FBI asset.

00:48:07.000 And you're like, okay, what do I give the FBI?

00:48:10.000 Like, members' names?

00:48:14.000 We should move on.

00:48:17.000 What were you just doing?

00:48:20.000 Do you have a mic next to your mic?

00:48:22.000 Why wouldn't the FBI just use the giant mic stuck to your face?

00:48:26.000 We should move on.

00:48:27.000 That's what I'm thinking.

00:48:29.000 Yeah, the only time the FBI compromise thing works is if the Prow Boys are planning an insurrection. 0.71

00:48:35.000 And then the guy calls the FBI and says, they're going to do it on Thursday.

00:48:39.000 But not only were the Prow Boys not doing an insurrection, nobody was.

00:48:43.000 Which is something we'll be focusing on on the January 6th episode.

00:48:46.000 It's GOML Live.

00:48:48.000 And we will be interviewing people involved, getting updates on their cases.

00:48:52.000 And the whole show will be dedicated to the meandering.

00:48:55.000 And we'll still take your calls.

00:48:56.000 And you know what?

00:48:57.000 I had said no to the super chat, but it raised a lot of money.

00:49:01.000 So maybe we should do the super chat.

00:49:03.000 Paychats.

00:49:04.000 Paychats?

00:49:05.000 Because I think super chats might be trademarked.

00:49:07.000 Paychats.

00:49:08.000 Paychats.

00:49:09.000 Paychats.

00:49:10.000 So when we do that, do people that are watching the show see them appear on the screen?

00:49:14.000 We can do that.

00:49:15.000 Yep.

00:49:15.000 I mean, Kyle Dunne does them.

00:49:19.000 Yeah, he's got YouTube.

00:49:21.000 We're banned off YouTube.

00:49:22.000 So we don't have a smooth interface, but we do have every tool to mimic the Super Space.

00:49:27.000 So do people, when they pay $4 and they say, like, Ryan is gay, does it appear on the screen and they see it?

00:49:34.000 Well, I'll control which ones go up and which ones don't, but.

00:49:37.000 Sure, that one could go up.

00:49:39.000 All right.

00:49:41.000 More of a $7 comment.

00:49:43.000 You know what I was thinking, a man on the street asking people since they compare January 6th to 9-11.

00:49:49.000 Uh-huh.

00:49:50.000 If they could take back one of those tragedies, what would it be?

00:49:53.000 So it's easy to compare the two, but when you say, well, let's undo one of them and restore the lives of the people lost there.

00:50:02.000 Wait, what's the question?

00:50:03.000 What are the two options, 9-11 and what's the other one?

00:50:05.000 January 6th.

00:50:06.000 They love comparing the two.

00:50:07.000 Oh, yeah.

00:50:07.000 But when you actually say, you have a time machine, you could take one of them back.

00:50:12.000 Ooh, dude, you've got to start doing Man on the Streets.

00:50:14.000 I want to.

00:50:14.000 Yeah, I have a bunch of fun questions like asking black people, white people, Asian people if they had three wishes and then see if there's any correlation there.

00:50:21.000 Oh, good, yeah.

00:50:22.000 So now we have something for you to do on Wednesdays and Thursdays.

00:50:27.000 Mayhaps, mayhaps. 0.73

00:50:28.000 Or just squeeze them in any time.

00:50:31.000 But that would be.

00:50:32.000 I bet you you're going to get a lot of people saying the insurrection.

00:50:34.000 But you'd have to.

00:50:34.000 See, the problem is you couldn't do it around here because I'm in the South Bronx is just going to be logical and be like, yo, who died in the most?

00:50:41.000 How many people died at January 6th?

00:50:42.000 Like five?

00:50:43.000 No, two.

00:50:44.000 I, then the other one.

00:50:48.000 I'm thinking the graphic for it.

00:50:49.000 But in like the richier parts of Westchester, they're going to be like, I'm sorry, and I know there was a lot more deaths in 9-11.

00:50:55.000 But as far as our democracy, I would say January 6th was worse.

00:50:58.000 So I would want to erase that.

00:50:59.000 I cannot imagine that happening.

00:51:01.000 I bet you will.

00:51:02.000 Yeah, I know, but it seems...

00:51:05.000 I have an idea for the...

00:51:06.000 Maybe they won't say that, but I know they think that.

00:51:08.000 Louis C.K. had a great bit in his new special where he talks about how they're talking about the COVID deaths, and they go, that's two 9-11s every day.

00:51:15.000 And he goes, when did we start measuring things in 9-11s?

00:51:19.000 And he goes, wait, that means like 9-11 wasn't so bad. 0.83

00:51:22.000 It was only one 9-11.

00:51:25.000 You know what's creepy?

00:51:26.000 What?

00:51:27.000 Check this out.

00:51:30.000 9-11?

00:51:31.000 Oh, no, that's January 6th, 1-6.

00:51:34.000 Uh-huh.

00:51:35.000 Now, you flip it upside down at 9-11.

00:51:39.000 That's going to be my graphic for the man on the street.

00:51:42.000 Wait, but that's...

00:51:43.000 9-1.

00:51:44.000 Okay, well, that 1 is 2.

00:51:46.000 Yeah, 9-1, and then I'll add a 1.

00:51:47.000 A one will come in and be like...

00:51:49.000 Okay, well, then if you go back, it's 11.6, so it's November 6th.

00:51:54.000 If you add a 1.

00:51:54.000 Okay, no, but it'll delete when it flips around.

00:51:57.000 What?

00:51:58.000 We just need a little fade.

00:51:59.000 You can't do that.

00:52:00.000 It's going to be the intro.

00:52:02.000 Check it out.

00:52:02.000 This number is sort of like this other number if you flip it upside down and add a number.

00:52:07.000 Are you accusing me of dramatria?

00:52:10.000 Yes.

00:52:10.000 Okay.

00:52:13.000 Okay, I think we're ready for the fucking mailbag already.

00:52:15.000 Although, I want to do a brief COVID thing that can't wait till tomorrow.

00:52:19.000 So let's do a little COVID setup.

00:52:22.000 I want you to redo this COVID setup.

00:52:23.000 I'm bored of it.

00:52:24.000 Okay.

00:52:26.000 If your language requires a paintbrush to write, your language sucks.

00:52:31.000 Your language is stupid. 1.00

00:52:33.000 Fucking Chinese. 1.00

00:52:35.000 Chinese vibrant ghostly.

00:52:37.000 Chinese asshole. 1.00

00:52:40.000 Chinese asshole. 1.00

00:52:42.000 Wow.

00:52:43.000 That was really impressive.

00:52:45.000 Chinese asshole. 1.00

00:52:46.000 You even have like the video artifact sound in it.

00:52:50.000 Chinese asshole. 1.00

00:52:52.000 Yeah, it sounds like the eyes.

00:52:54.000 It's perfect.

00:52:55.000 Wow.

00:52:56.000 Chinese asshole. 1.00

00:52:58.000 A little too far.

00:52:59.000 Yeah.

00:53:01.000 This story can't wait.

00:53:03.000 And I'm kind of like a woman with a lot of these news items, and I just sort of go with my heart.

00:53:08.000 I don't know why I feel this way, but I kind of like that Antonio Brown just fucking went, fuck this.

00:53:13.000 I'm out of here.

00:53:14.000 Now, there may have been a story.

00:53:15.000 I don't know football, but I hear that they weren't going to pay him, so they weren't letting him get X. He was supposed to get to 300 whatever's kicks, and they weren't letting him do it, so he wouldn't get his raise or whatever.

00:53:27.000 That might have been it.

00:53:28.000 He also was anti-vax, and they were punishing him for that.

00:53:31.000 Oh, yeah.

00:53:32.000 But I think he just sort of said, fuck this.

00:53:35.000 Bye.

00:53:36.000 And he took off.

00:53:38.000 Go back to the beginning.

00:53:40.000 They don't even know why they're cheering.

00:53:41.000 You're never going to see him again.

00:53:43.000 Turn on the volume, Wiener Breath.

00:53:45.000 That's the beginning, but there might be a different clip.

00:53:51.000 Yeah, so the clip I saw, he's taking off his shit.

00:53:55.000 And I know you could take all that off in one fell swoop, by the way.

00:54:00.000 And then he takes off his sort of undershirt and he throws it into the crowd.

00:54:04.000 But as he's taking off his equipment, there's another Tampa Bay dude going, what are you doing, Antonio?

00:54:10.000 Stop.

00:54:11.000 Stop.

00:54:14.000 But he's rich.

00:54:15.000 He didn't want to do that anymore.

00:54:17.000 And he just said, take this job and stuff it.

00:54:19.000 I ain't working here no more.

00:54:22.000 Who did he hurt?

00:54:24.000 Somebody, I think Matt Walsh pointed out, it's okay if that Black Olympian did it, but it's not okay if Antonio Brown does it.

00:54:31.000 Yeah, actually, the Olympian annoyed me because she let down a lot of people.

00:54:36.000 America was counting on her, and she just said, eh, I'm feeling kind of weird.

00:54:40.000 What?

00:54:41.000 And then she was on the cover of a bunch of magazines as a hero.

00:54:44.000 I don't get why the perception is so different.

00:54:47.000 He's not hurting anyone.

00:54:49.000 He's a private contractor.

00:54:51.000 The team will do fine without him.

00:54:53.000 It's not like it's, what's his name?

00:54:56.000 What's his name?

00:54:57.000 Tom Brady.

00:54:58.000 So who gives a shit?

00:55:00.000 It's funny.

00:55:02.000 It's like a dumb tattoo.

00:55:04.000 My son's on the cover of a magazine.

00:55:07.000 And then, of course, we have Artur Polowski arrested again.

00:55:12.000 Canada is in full fucking fascist mode.

00:55:15.000 Isn't it funny that Justin Trudeau is the son of a dictator and he's acting like a total fucking dictator, stifling the media, attacking anyone who disobeys his orders, throwing people in prison for not following Justin Trudeau.

00:55:27.000 And that's a lot like his father, Fidel Castro.

00:55:33.000 Not Pierre Trudeau.

00:55:34.000 Look at Pierre Trudeau.

00:55:36.000 He looks like Martin Short and a frog had a baby.

00:55:39.000 And Justin Trudeau looks like Margaret Trudeau and Fidel Castro had a baby.

00:55:45.000 He looks exact.

00:55:47.000 Look at the picture right there.

00:55:49.000 Is that Justin Trudeau?

00:55:52.000 That's Martin Short and a frog.

00:55:55.000 A little bit of Joel Austin in there, too.

00:55:59.000 There is zero Justin Trudeau about him.

00:56:02.000 Justin Trudeau is not even bald.

00:56:04.000 And then you look up young Fidel Castro and they are fucking clones.

00:56:12.000 Look at that.

00:56:13.000 I mean, come on.

00:56:15.000 That's Bananas.

00:56:18.000 So maybe being a dictator is genetic.

00:56:20.000 Oh, look, someone's merged the faces together there.

00:56:23.000 That's spooky.

00:56:24.000 Spooky.

00:56:26.000 Spooker.

00:56:27.000 Even when he's old.

00:56:28.000 His hair, too.

00:56:30.000 Yeah.

00:56:30.000 Hair.

00:56:33.000 If your dad's bald, you're probably going to be bald.

00:56:36.000 Yeah, where'd he get my chins?

00:56:40.000 I mean, come on.

00:56:42.000 This is the same as Ronan Farrow and Frank Sinatra.

00:56:47.000 It's inarguable.

00:56:50.000 And then the other huge story is Dr. Robert Malone went on Joe Rogan.

00:56:56.000 We've all seen it.

00:56:57.000 Yeah, that's just...

00:57:00.000 Sorry, I'm not open to any debate here.

00:57:03.000 We're done.

00:57:04.000 I've never seen this.

00:57:05.000 That's stunning.

00:57:07.000 Old blue eyes.

00:57:09.000 Dr. Robert Malone, who has been vaxed, by the way, he's known as an anti-vaxxer.

00:57:14.000 No, he's an anti-mandator.

00:57:16.000 Dr. Malone broke the algorithms, and now Google is struggling to manually edit the results when you search for mass formation psychosis.

00:57:23.000 Mass formation psychosis, of course, is when the masses all focus on one particular thing, and when they're separated from each other in, say, a national divorce like we're in now, they become easily manipulated.

00:57:37.000 And that's where we are today.

00:57:40.000 Google Mass Formation Psychosis, because when I did it, I got that same, it looks like these results are changing quickly, but that was yesterday.

00:57:48.000 It may have changed since then.

00:57:50.000 But it's a fascinating interview.

00:57:52.000 It's a must-see.

00:57:54.000 Sign up for Spotify if you're not on it.

00:57:55.000 This is why Spotify is paying him big money.

00:57:58.000 Oh, now you can see his definition of it.

00:58:04.000 That's new.

00:58:04.000 That wasn't at the top before.

00:58:06.000 Maybe they're doing that because they got called out.

00:58:08.000 This is DuckDuckGo.

00:58:10.000 Oh, right.

00:58:10.000 Yes.

00:58:12.000 I asked you to Google it, actually.

00:58:14.000 So.

00:58:15.000 Google is kind of just a term for Velcro or DuckTayGo.

00:58:19.000 The assignment.

00:58:21.000 Biad.

00:58:24.000 And in it, he talks about basically the crux of the whole interview is big pharma coerced the government into not looking at treatments, not looking at ivermectrin,

00:58:40.000 mectin, whatever it's called, hydroxychloroquine.

00:58:43.000 You know, treating it early.

00:58:44.000 No, it's all about the vaccine.

00:58:48.000 And the treatment, I don't know.

00:58:50.000 The analogy I always use with cancer is cancer is about treating it early.

00:58:55.000 Any research you see, it says any expert will say all the other shit with the my mind's just gone blank.

00:59:04.000 Cirrhosis, carcinogens.

00:59:06.000 What the fuck do you call it?

00:59:07.000 Where you get blasted and you go bald?

00:59:09.000 Chemo.

00:59:10.000 All the stuff with chemo, that's all shutting the horse after the, shutting the door after the horses have bolted.

00:59:17.000 Jesus, come on, Gavin.

00:59:20.000 But with early detection, that's how you conquer cancer.

00:59:26.000 I'm having a stroke on this show.

00:59:28.000 Dial 911. 0.87

00:59:30.000 Turn it upside down.

00:59:31.000 Dial it on November 6th.

00:59:34.000 Upside down.

00:59:36.000 And they have all kinds of fantastic plans too, like showers that the water runs down and they can detect through the water whether you have it.

00:59:45.000 What's that?

00:59:46.000 Say that again?

00:59:47.000 Yeah, that's how you cure cancer.

00:59:49.000 But what they're doing here, the way they're treating COVID, is like saying, okay, well, we don't want to test you early.

00:59:54.000 We have no plan for like putting radioactive isotopes in your prostate.

00:59:59.000 We're going to wait till it metastasizes and then go into the hospital.

01:00:02.000 Well, it is a very unfortunate situation.

01:00:06.000 Which sounds like you don't give a shit about human life.

01:00:10.000 I mean, ultimately, nothing matters with COVID.

01:00:13.000 Sweden didn't do anything.

01:00:15.000 They had normal death amounts.

01:00:18.000 My experience has been you look at the places that were really fascist about lockdowns and all that shit.

01:00:24.000 They seem to do worse than Sweden. 0.99

01:00:26.000 So let nature take its course.

01:00:31.000 And then Rogan had a great point during the interview where he said, there's so much fear-mongering going on that it's replaced our skepticism.

01:00:39.000 That's 2-7.

01:00:52.000 So we could play this whole thing and make things the opposite of it.

01:00:56.000 Well, that's one of the more disturbing things.

01:00:58.000 The opposite of that is one of the more disturbing things about this pandemic is how people have just decided because they're scared and because they want a solution that the pharmaceutical companies have their best interests at heart and that they're not these machines that are designed to make money.

01:01:18.000 And they sell drugs and the drugs are often beneficial, but their main goal is to make money.

01:01:25.000 And if they can fudge the data, if they can move the numbers around, if they can delete negative consequences.

01:01:31.000 Pfizer is one of the most criminal pharmaceutical organizations in the world based on their past legal history and fines.

01:01:41.000 What do those fines include?

01:01:42.000 Bribing physicians.

01:01:44.000 Wait a minute.

01:01:45.000 It is a cough.

01:01:46.000 Pfizer who they were asked to take the there's a way to get meth out of cough medicine, I believe.

01:01:57.000 And there was a way you could control the chemical composition of it where it would still be effective, but it would paralyze the ability to get meth out of it.

01:02:10.000 This is in a book, Meth Land.

01:02:12.000 Yeah.

01:02:13.000 And so they said to Pfizer, can you just change that one little fucking microbe?

01:02:20.000 And Pfizer went, sorry, that would cost us money.

01:02:22.000 No.

01:02:23.000 And we have a meth epidemic in this country, especially in the South and the Midwest to this day that's just shocking.

01:02:29.000 Shocking.

01:02:30.000 I don't mean to disparage meth.

01:02:32.000 We've all had our dalliances.

01:02:35.000 But yeah, that was years ago.

01:02:38.000 I read that in a book called Meth Land, which is this is way before COVID or even the opioid epidemic, and it was all about Pfizer's crime and their culpability when it comes to the meth epidemic.

01:02:52.000 Anyway, that's a big long interview you've got to check out on your own.

01:02:56.000 All right, let's jump into the mailbag.

01:03:05.000 Let's turn the piece together's mailbag.

01:03:11.000 Let me touch it.

01:03:17.000 Bag.

01:03:19.000 Thought my batteries were dead.

01:03:22.000 Why are you talking funny?

01:03:24.000 So how'd you find that remote in the box?

01:03:27.000 Well, thank you for that question.

01:03:31.000 I decided the entire cable box was corrupt.

01:03:37.000 So I went, we have old cable boxes from like when I used to have my office in the attic and a bunch of others.

01:03:46.000 So I went through, I found a little mini one, which I don't think that can be your main one.

01:03:50.000 Those are like the extras.

01:03:52.000 Anyway, I replaced all the cords, plugged it in, and it wasn't working.

01:03:56.000 But while I was digging through that thing, I saw a light at the bottom of the box.

01:04:00.000 And I realized the light was the button being pushed.

01:04:03.000 That's awesome.

01:04:14.000 Okay, there's two letters I've been meaning to get to for a while now.

01:04:18.000 One of them you might not even have, Ryguy.

01:04:20.000 Okay.

01:04:22.000 But it's from a cop who has tongue cancer from eating pussy. 0.96

01:04:28.000 Really?

01:04:29.000 Wow.

01:04:29.000 Yeah, which I'm definitely getting.

01:04:33.000 Like, let's just cut the shit.

01:04:36.000 In a weird way, not to be morbid, but it's kind of like an award.

01:04:41.000 Well, would I go back and un-eat those pussies? 1.00

01:04:43.000 I don't know.

01:04:44.000 It depends when I die.

01:04:45.000 I would if I'm going to die, like, in a year.

01:04:48.000 But if I'm 70 and I have tongue cancer.

01:04:52.000 You know how many weeks.

01:04:52.000 God, I didn't mean that.

01:04:53.000 I didn't mean that.

01:04:54.000 80, 80.

01:04:55.000 And now I'm like Tom Holland with Doctor Strange, wrecking the spell.

01:04:59.000 If I took back all the pussy eatings I got, there would be a lot of women that say I have zero redeeming qualities. 1.00

01:05:05.000 And I cannot look at it.

01:05:06.000 Dude, I don't know if my kids would be alive.

01:05:08.000 Because, well, I won't get into detail with my wife, but that's what put me over the edge.

01:05:13.000 G-Dog Maddie and the dude who's doing the best he can with what little amount of skill he has.

01:05:18.000 I guess that was when Joe Tonelli was working here.

01:05:23.000 Gavin, I'm not really sure why I'm writing at this point, because I'm not really sure why I'm writing at this point, because the current clown world state of policing seems to be the new norm and not going away soon.

01:05:32.000 I went through the police academy in 1997 and was a cop for 22 years.

01:05:36.000 In that time, I used my crew to encounter some of the worst individuals out there and put them in jail.

01:05:40.000 It was simple.

01:05:41.000 Find the criminals.

01:05:43.000 Don't stop enforcing the laws they break until they themselves are done.

01:05:46.000 Sounds idealistic, but with persistent ambition, we made it reality for about five years.

01:05:52.000 I have no doubt other law enforcement listeners know how this works.

01:05:55.000 I love my job.

01:05:56.000 I was my job, and at the time, it was a worthwhile job no one could be proud of.

01:06:02.000 Sorry, it was a job one could be proud of for all the right reasons.

01:06:05.000 I should find this was in, he was a cop in Fort Wayne, Indiana.

01:06:12.000 Cut to 2020 after months of lockdown.

01:06:14.000 The reaction to the George Floyd riots began.

01:06:17.000 The city I live in lost its mind.

01:06:18.000 I found myself guarding a fire station, a place where citizens can go for help in emergencies, was now potentially under attack.

01:06:26.000 I stood dehydrated for that five hours that day at the fire station with another officer.

01:06:30.000 When the really heavy rioting began, the firefighters would not even come out to help the injured who began arriving from the epicenter of the chaos.

01:06:39.000 The police command on the radio continually screamed and yelled on the air that they were obviously overwhelmed as they let a huge crowd of rioters travel through the city like a giant Pac-Man.

01:06:49.000 I started to hear all the radio, I started hearing on the radio all the riot training we had attended sporadically through the years not appear to be working at all.

01:06:57.000 The rioters were running the show.

01:06:59.000 As my hometown turned to complete shit, I heard it announced that the riders were headed directly at me.

01:07:04.000 My partner reacted by jumping in his cruiser and literally driving to the crowd by himself.

01:07:09.000 His car was pelted and the video was used later to show how bad things were.

01:07:14.000 I stayed at my post and began to hear the crowd approaching.

01:07:16.000 As I saw turn coming over the bridge, I also saw bottles and random things coming at me through the air.

01:07:23.000 Given my training, I called for backup and heard, just get out of there from an unknown voice screaming across the radio.

01:07:30.000 With limited resources, I used a crowd-sized can of pepper spray to make a wall of gas between me and the crowd.

01:07:37.000 I was able to get out of the area as the crowd covered the street like ants.

01:07:41.000 Only a week later, I was assigned at the end of my eight-hour shift to an indefinite assignment of guarding a BLM protest in which the chief of police and the mayor walked hand in hand with protesters with bullhorns, actively slandering police.

01:07:54.000 Now, I got to do a whole deep dive on their martyrs versus our martyrs.

01:07:59.000 Like the little boy in the Boston Marathon Parade, who no one knows.

01:08:04.000 And then George Floyd, Dwayne Wright, all these career criminal scumbags that are martyred.

01:08:10.000 Our martyrs versus their martyrs.

01:08:12.000 Coming soon to a theater near you.

01:08:17.000 The next day I went into work and after listening to Riot by the Dead Kennedys, I drove to the chief's office and without telling him my loved ones, I just quit.

01:08:25.000 I fired myself and I don't regret it one bit.

01:08:27.000 It is important to add that the union president and chief of police, even though available, never talked to me or tried to change my mind.

01:08:34.000 The state of policing has been forever changed.

01:08:36.000 People need to be ready to sleep in the bed they let the media make for them.

01:08:39.000 No doubt in 10 years, policing will be handled by DARPA dogs and drones.

01:08:43.000 Now, speaking of which, I tried to get a hold of Tommy Robinson, but I was too late.

01:08:46.000 Maybe we'll get him tomorrow.

01:08:47.000 But he's single-handedly fighting the rape of Britain over there.

01:08:52.000 And there's a town called Telford where the Muslim gangs suspect, they're not sure, and they're wrong.

01:08:59.000 They suspect this woman has been talking to Tommy for a documentary he's doing on these Muslim grooming gangs.

01:09:07.000 Now, the woman is handicapped. 1.00

01:09:09.000 The daughter is slow, and they've clearly been raping the daughter. 1.00

01:09:12.000 So they go, ah, we're raping her, so she's probably one of the rats. 1.00

01:09:16.000 So they decided to burn her house down.

01:09:18.000 So Tommy is on Getter saying, sound, sound, sound as a pound.

01:09:23.000 If there's any lads out there, or we need you to come down to Telford, he gives the address because the cat's out of the bag with the bad guys, so I got it.

01:09:31.000 Might as well give it to the good guys.

01:09:33.000 And he says, come down to 14 Charing Cross, whatever, Telford.

01:09:37.000 And let's guard this house.

01:09:40.000 There's a bunch of soccer hooligans just sitting around the house 24 hours a day. 1.00

01:09:44.000 And they've duct tape the mailbox, and they regularly go outside when they hear a car coming, and they catch these kids, these Muslim groomers. 1.00

01:09:52.000 And they're all pussies, by the way. 1.00

01:09:54.000 The second they see the lads, they screech out of there.

01:09:57.000 And they're just waiting for a chance to firebomb the house.

01:10:01.000 And that's life without police.

01:10:03.000 That's where we're headed in this defund the police and the police shit.

01:10:09.000 After being unemployed for a year and hours of PTSD therapy, I now sit here diagnosed with stage one tongue cancer.

01:10:14.000 On New Year's Eve, I'll be having half my tongue removed.

01:10:18.000 And a piece of my arm will be grafted to my tongue.

01:10:20.000 What's this?

01:10:21.000 His car firebombed three hours ago?

01:10:24.000 Holy shit.

01:10:25.000 On Monday evening.

01:10:27.000 Wow.

01:10:28.000 Click on it.

01:10:30.000 Was he hurt?

01:10:34.000 After releasing the trailer.

01:10:36.000 Like, I've got to find that woman. 0.78

01:10:37.000 I can't remember who it was.

01:10:38.000 It was some mayor talking about, or maybe it was even our mayor's wife there, the little gremlin, saying it's not going to happen tomorrow, but within the next few years, we should be able to have a society with no police. 0.91

01:10:50.000 This is it.

01:10:54.000 There's been news reports circulating about a car firebomb attack in Telford.

01:10:57.000 The police and fire crews had to attend.

01:10:59.000 That was actually my car.

01:11:01.000 So last night my car was bombed.

01:11:03.000 This is the...

01:11:04.000 There have been Pakistani rape gangs are waging war in the town of Telford.

01:11:09.000 There's been five arson attacks in the last week.

01:11:11.000 Houses smashed up.

01:11:12.000 Police refusing to help families.

01:11:14.000 We've had to relocate families.

01:11:16.000 But that's the update for me is that last night they blew up my car outside the hotel.

01:11:21.000 And we have no confidence in this place.

01:11:23.000 I'm giving them the keys.

01:11:24.000 They're doing forensics apparently.

01:11:26.000 No confidence at all.

01:11:27.000 But this is to deter us and think they can stop us.

01:11:30.000 Maybe this is the reason journalists stay away from this issue in the UK, all the mainstream media.

01:11:35.000 Maybe they're scared.

01:11:36.000 the problem is, we're not.

01:11:38.000 So, to the men who firebomb the car, to the men who are giving out these threats, to the men who are smashing up houses, it's not going to deter us.

01:11:44.000 It makes us more determined.

01:11:46.000 You're going to be famous.

01:11:47.000 Everyone's going to know who you are.

01:11:48.000 The films are going out.

01:11:52.000 That is not a dude who likes to add fucking around into the mix.

01:11:57.000 He's not big with the fucking of the around.

01:12:00.000 I'll pass.

01:12:02.000 Wow.

01:12:05.000 Unbelievable.

01:12:07.000 And the impunity that these grooming gangs attack with is just unprecedented.

01:12:14.000 It really is amazing.

01:12:16.000 And who else is fighting?

01:12:18.000 It's just Tommy and a bunch of fucking soccer hooligans, a bunch of lads.

01:12:22.000 They have taken over and are fighting to protect the children of Britain because the cops are all cops and they're scared of being seen as racist by pursuing rapists.

01:12:35.000 Sound good?

01:12:37.000 Is that where we want to go?

01:12:38.000 As Ezra Levant said, Britain is just a dystopic time machine where you can see what we're going to be like in a few years.

01:12:46.000 Anyway, let's jump to the final video.

01:12:49.000 Short romance.

01:13:02.000 This is almost a green screen.

01:13:06.000 I could have made this a green screen.

01:13:09.000 That's what I used to call green screens when I was a baby.

01:13:12.000 That is cute.

01:13:13.000 I wish I had a video of it.

01:13:14.000 I mean, we didn't have video back then, but I used to say green screen.

01:13:21.000 Pretty fucking adorable if I don't say so myself.

01:13:24.000 Well, you'd have to say so yourself because nobody else is.

01:13:30.000 Oh, shit.

01:13:34.000 So this is a white man and a black man.

01:13:37.000 They are having some kind of altercation, and the white man shoves the black man.

01:13:41.000 Now, my experience has been with boxing and MMA.

01:13:45.000 The arrogant shit talker who's laughing about how this is going to be a slam dunk never wins.

01:13:51.000 Unfortunately, all these interlopers, including the fat guy in the middle there and the stupid bitch next to the dude, she's just off on the far left, they ruin this whole fight. 1.00

01:14:04.000 But check out the theatrics of this black dir after he gets his face smushed. 0.97

01:14:13.000 Such a weird thing.

01:14:15.000 Look, he's dancing.

01:14:17.000 Clapping.

01:14:18.000 Now he's playing air basketball and getting a swoosh.

01:14:22.000 Three pointers.

01:14:24.000 Now he's got his hand in there.

01:14:26.000 He kisses him and then knocks him out.

01:14:28.000 Nope.

01:14:30.000 So what is she doing?

01:14:31.000 Get out of the way. 0.53

01:14:33.000 So now he's still doing his theatrics, the black guy. 1.00

01:14:36.000 And Fatty says, get out of there. 0.91

01:14:38.000 And now, I've watched this a few times.

01:14:39.000 Go back and watch her get knocked over. 0.99

01:14:41.000 What, did she land on a nail? 0.96

01:14:43.000 What is with the...

01:14:45.000 Look, I'm going to kiss you and knock you out. 1.00

01:14:47.000 Boom.

01:14:48.000 Sorry, dude.

01:14:49.000 Your punch isn't going to be that great.

01:14:51.000 So when he punches the guy back, they both miss, of course.

01:14:53.000 Look, he punches like this.

01:14:55.000 What is this?

01:14:56.000 Ever heard of this?

01:14:58.000 That's his second face schmush.

01:15:01.000 I think he's trying to grab hair because he later does.

01:15:03.000 Oh, right.

01:15:03.000 You've seen this.

01:15:04.000 Yes.

01:15:05.000 But look, watch her fall. 0.73

01:15:07.000 It's fine.

01:15:08.000 She's fine.

01:15:09.000 Like, it's not even close to a mosh pit fall. 0.91

01:15:13.000 She should not get involved in slapstick comedy.

01:15:16.000 Look at that.

01:15:17.000 I don't even think she hit her head.

01:15:20.000 Boop.

01:15:20.000 She did not.

01:15:22.000 All of it was on her bum bum. 0.99

01:15:24.000 And then she lies there like she's been shot in the cunt. 1.00

01:15:29.000 She's been shot in the cunt. 0.99

01:15:31.000 You're fine.

01:15:32.000 And get out of there.

01:15:34.000 So now they're like, what have you done?

01:15:35.000 Where's the volume?

01:15:42.000 He's still dancing around like he's in Cirque de Soleil.

01:15:45.000 And this guy's like, just let me kick his ass. 0.99

01:15:48.000 Look what you've done to her.

01:15:49.000 She's dead.

01:15:50.000 You shoved her down onto a bed of fucking AIDS nails. 0.86

01:15:55.000 Now her head's falling off.

01:15:57.000 She's Nicole Simpson, dumbass. 1.00

01:15:59.000 Look at her.

01:16:01.000 Ladies, just get out of the way, please. 1.00

01:16:04.000 So now he's done.

01:16:05.000 I guess he's dancing like 50 feet away.

01:16:08.000 And he's coming back, skipping.

01:16:10.000 He's literally skipping.

01:16:12.000 And that guy's like, good, skip, bitch. 1.00

01:16:14.000 So then he thinks he's going to flip him, but the guy's like 310 pounds.

01:16:18.000 He tried to shoot for the leg, like Gregorome.

01:16:21.000 Yeah, yeah.

01:16:21.000 So he thought he could.

01:16:22.000 He could pick him up and throw him down.

01:16:24.000 I guess he's used to beating up kids.

01:16:26.000 Because you can't pick up a giant man as easily.

01:16:32.000 Now he's got...

01:16:34.000 Now they're vying for control.

01:16:38.000 And then that guy's in Baghdad protecting her from fucking grenade shrapnel.

01:16:44.000 And what's...

01:16:44.000 Is he wearing a baby backpack?

01:16:46.000 What's around his arms?

01:16:48.000 I don't know.

01:16:48.000 I can see a skin yarmulke, and that's it.

01:16:51.000 Dude, you should convert to Judaism fast. 1.00

01:16:55.000 And then there's this.

01:16:57.000 I don't know what the fuck these other guys are doing.

01:17:00.000 Is that a black guy in the yellow shirt?

01:17:02.000 One punch, two punches, finally real punches.

01:17:05.000 And then he's got his hair, which when they've got dreads, that's a good look.

01:17:09.000 And then that guy's doing the fight-face thing going, see that bitch grab my hair? 1.00

01:17:13.000 Bitch. 1.00

01:17:18.000 Good thing is, no matter what you do to his hair, it can't look sillier than when he's...

01:17:21.000 Right.

01:17:22.000 You got my hair all messy.

01:17:23.000 He's not like John Travolta in Sarnet Fever.

01:17:25.000 Don't touch the hair.

01:17:27.000 So now they're still yelling.

01:17:29.000 I'd love to know what started all this.

01:17:33.000 Look, she's still on the ground recovering from her bum fall. 1.00

01:17:37.000 Tying her shoes?

01:17:39.000 And laying on her guy.

01:17:42.000 Wow, that guy is just like...

01:17:44.000 Oh, thanks.

01:17:45.000 That's like a back crack.

01:17:50.000 That guy is...

01:17:52.000 Oh, I haven't watched it this long.

01:17:53.000 He's in for it.

01:17:54.000 Which guy?

01:17:55.000 The white guy's in the bottom. 0.54

01:17:55.000 He's in his blood. 0.54

01:17:57.000 Yeah, yeah.

01:17:58.000 In for it means you're in trouble.

01:17:59.000 Oh.

01:18:01.000 He's going at it.

01:18:03.000 Let them fight.

01:18:05.000 To quote Phil Linett of Finn Lizzie: if the boys want to fight, you better let them.

01:18:10.000 Guess who just got back today?

01:18:14.000 So it is a black man in the yellow shirt.

01:18:16.000 What is his mouth?

01:18:20.000 Something about wife? 0.97

01:18:29.000 Huh?

01:18:31.000 That guy's pretty muscular.

01:18:33.000 Got great adults.

01:18:36.000 But you can tell that guy was like college wrestling or football and he can handle himself.

01:18:40.000 Don't end.

01:18:41.000 Don't end.

01:18:43.000 And that's how you feel about this show.

01:18:46.000 You don't want it to end.

01:18:48.000 But we can only give you so much gav a day.

01:18:52.000 I don't want to be like Pfizer where I'm responsible for ODs.

01:18:56.000 So we're going to take it easy.

01:18:57.000 But welcome back.

01:18:57.000 2022 is on.

01:19:00.000 We've got a great year planned for you.

01:19:02.000 Lots of fun stuff.

01:19:04.000 We're back with Compound Censored this Wednesday.

01:19:07.000 Thursday is going to be the Jan 6, or as Ryan says, upside down, the 9-1 anniversary.

01:19:16.000 And we'll be talking to lawyers involved, people involved, get updates on all their cases and the ridiculous persecution of these guys for fucking misdemeanors.

01:19:26.000 And then Friday will be another show like this.

01:19:27.000 We'll do some green screens, have some fun guests.

01:19:30.000 I got to talk to Tommy about this Telford shit, too.

01:19:33.000 It's just apocalyptic.

01:19:37.000 Anyway, see you tomorrow, folks, at this time.

01:19:39.000 Get fired.

01:19:40.000 Get in trouble.

01:19:41.000 Be brave.

01:19:42.000 And never stop fighting.

01:19:54.000 Crazy mash thinks he's a toad.

01:20:01.000 If I catch any of you fuckers alone, I'm going to fucking kill you.

01:20:06.000 Jesus Christ.

01:20:12.000 Don't be a pewie pie, okay? 0.99

Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - January 03, 2022

S04E70 - INTO THE SPIDER-VERSE

Episode Stats

Summary

Transcript