Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - March 29, 2022


S4E101 - BLACK SPRINKLES


Episode Stats

Length

1 hour and 30 minutes

Words per Minute

149.4215

Word Count

13,560

Sentence Count

1,605

Misogynist Sentences

58

Hate Speech Sentences

106


Summary

On this week's episode of the podcast, the boys talk about their sex lives and the things they would do if they were on a sex strike. Also, we talk about a bird feeder that doesn't work, and a guy who can't remember his own name.


Transcript

00:01:01.000 What was the drums?
00:01:04.000 New York band, put out an album every two years or so.
00:01:07.000 Been around for about 10 years, five albums.
00:01:10.000 Fantastic, fun little band my wife turned me on to.
00:01:14.000 I guess she listens to KEXP a lot and she learns about the hot new shit, even though that's 10 years old.
00:01:21.000 I can't listen to KEXP because they went woke and they suck now in the mornings.
00:01:27.000 Speaking of my wife, my sex strike worked.
00:01:32.000 A lot of negative nellies, baby monsters telling me that it's stupid to do that and I'm never going to get laid.
00:01:41.000 You have to temper the strike with grumpiness, too.
00:01:47.000 You're not just like super fun, happy-go-lucky guy who also didn't get laid.
00:01:54.000 Then it's win-win.
00:01:57.000 I was on strike the whole week, but I was grumpy all week.
00:02:00.000 Very curt, no texts, no jokes.
00:02:04.000 Then there was suggestions of intercourse.
00:02:08.000 There was elaborate outfits involved.
00:02:10.000 I got the top of the line everything.
00:02:13.000 And then Pavlov was very fun and friendly after that.
00:02:20.000 In fact, we partied till the wee hours on Sunday night at Gavstav.
00:02:26.000 By the way, the sign for GavzTav looks amazing.
00:02:30.000 It's amazing.
00:02:33.000 I couldn't have dreamed for anything better.
00:02:36.000 Holy shit.
00:02:37.000 You know when you think of something in your head and then you finally get it and you go, eh, that's similar, but oh well, nothing's perfect.
00:02:43.000 This is way better than what was in my head.
00:02:46.000 Damn.
00:02:47.000 Shall I show you?
00:02:48.000 Yeah.
00:02:52.000 Of course it occurs.
00:02:53.000 He says, where should I mail it to?
00:02:56.000 And I'm like, I guess I got to give away our address.
00:02:59.000 And then I thought, no, let's not even risk it with that.
00:03:03.000 Let's send it to another guy.
00:03:07.000 Sorry.
00:03:08.000 I should have had this ready earlier.
00:03:10.000 Here we go.
00:03:12.000 You're not going to believe this.
00:03:13.000 It is stunning.
00:03:14.000 Try to hide his fucking email and all that.
00:03:20.000 But it's not just cut out.
00:03:21.000 It seems kind of like cut out and rounded in a weird, groovy way.
00:03:26.000 And it's shiny, too.
00:03:27.000 You can't really see the shine in this particular shot I sent you.
00:03:30.000 What the fuck was that?
00:03:31.000 I hate when that...
00:03:32.000 I don't even know what it is, but I don't like it.
00:03:35.000 I think it was mine thing here.
00:03:38.000 Computer, what's wrong?
00:03:41.000 Everything seems to be working.
00:03:43.000 If something looks wrong, you can use the Alexa app to submit feedback.
00:03:47.000 Computer, why were you yellow?
00:03:50.000 A pulsing yellow light is an indication your device may have unread notifications, messages, or you may have missed a reminder.
00:03:58.000 Computer, please read notifications.
00:04:00.000 These are going to suck, by the way.
00:04:02.000 One new notification from Amazon Shopping.
00:04:05.000 Your return for bird feeder.
00:04:07.000 Okay, thank you very much.
00:04:09.000 Ew, you got a bird feeder?
00:04:12.000 Oh, man.
00:04:13.000 What, that's embarrassing?
00:04:15.000 Yeah.
00:04:16.000 Fucking Derek from More Place, More Dates here.
00:04:19.000 Fucking bird feeders are like really low in all-ergeninine, L-carnisine, and L-citrilline.
00:04:25.000 So if you're a new with the remarkably low T is making fun of me for a bird feeder?
00:04:32.000 Bird feeders are cool.
00:04:33.000 Feeding birds is fucking not enough.
00:04:35.000 The reason I shut her up is I was scared she was going to say my address.
00:04:38.000 Oh, true.
00:04:39.000 But yeah, the bird feeder I got was more China crap.
00:04:43.000 The software doesn't work.
00:04:44.000 It purports to be a bird feeder that takes a picture of the bird, which is the bald eagle, and then tells you that it's the bird which is the bald eagle.
00:04:53.000 But this thing that it was garbage.
00:04:55.000 Gav stav.
00:04:56.000 But look how gorgeous that is.
00:04:58.000 That looks really low-res, right?
00:04:59.000 It is.
00:05:00.000 These pictures were like one kilobyte by one kiloninobyte.
00:05:05.000 Really?
00:05:05.000 It wasn't on my side.
00:05:07.000 Look at this.
00:05:08.000 I had to blow it up.
00:05:09.000 Don't show my home bar, you fucking idiot.
00:05:11.000 Well, it's blurred.
00:05:13.000 Well, it's blurred?
00:05:15.000 Jesus Christ.
00:05:16.000 No, no, no, I mean it's blurred in post.
00:05:18.000 Like, nobody could see it.
00:05:23.000 So yeah, you got to temper the strike with grumpiness if you want it to be effective.
00:05:27.000 But it was effective.
00:05:29.000 My life couldn't be better.
00:05:30.000 And I've sent the message that when Gav gets regular horsing around, the world's a funner place to be in.
00:05:40.000 Also in the news, our con ad bills are so fucking insane.
00:05:46.000 Our con ad bill for this studio is $25 a day.
00:05:51.000 Now, these lights are all LED.
00:05:53.000 They don't use any electricity.
00:05:54.000 There's zero heat from them.
00:05:56.000 They're the new fangled.
00:05:57.000 This is in the 50s anymore.
00:05:59.000 So lights are not hot.
00:06:00.000 They don't use a lot of electricity.
00:06:02.000 Cameras, computers, they're not that big on power.
00:06:07.000 This is all just binary shit.
00:06:10.000 And then the lights in the bar, the lights, it's just lights.
00:06:13.000 Lights and computers and cameras.
00:06:15.000 $25 a day.
00:06:16.000 Now, obviously there's heating in that.
00:06:18.000 But it hasn't been that cold.
00:06:22.000 You can hear the heating come on on the show, and it's pretty hot.
00:06:26.000 What?
00:06:28.000 You're right.
00:06:29.000 But What did you just say?
00:06:31.000 No, I accidentally played a video.
00:06:33.000 Who is that guy?
00:06:35.000 Is that like some YouTube bodybuilding dude that only you are into?
00:06:39.000 He's the guy that makes your fucking pre-workout energy drink.
00:06:42.000 Yeah, Brian, stop advertising these fucking weirdos no one's heard of.
00:06:47.000 This guy is the most popular man in the sub space.
00:06:51.000 Called, why the fuck is Trent Turning Me Homosexual?
00:06:56.000 Substantiated underscore hand.
00:06:58.000 He seems awesome.
00:06:58.000 He was on Rogan.
00:07:00.000 No, he is awesome.
00:07:00.000 He's based.
00:07:01.000 He was on Rogan?
00:07:02.000 He was on Rogan.
00:07:03.000 He's based.
00:07:04.000 And he's got fucking huge delts.
00:07:07.000 And he makes these great products.
00:07:09.000 Are those your real delts?
00:07:12.000 Or are you wearing football pads?
00:07:15.000 Go to sensor.tv to get some incredible merch.
00:07:22.000 And guess how much my Coned bill is for my home?
00:07:30.000 $15 a day.
00:07:31.000 $50.
00:07:34.000 Our last bill for a month was $1,600.
00:07:39.000 Is that right?
00:07:40.000 Yeah.
00:07:41.000 $50 a fucking day.
00:07:43.000 I'm like, is the dryer on non-stop?
00:07:45.000 What the fuck is going on?
00:07:47.000 And then I talked to other people, and their bills were similar, not as bad as mine, but they were like $1,100, $1,200.
00:07:52.000 Now, we were doing a lot of renovations, so the doors were open and stuff, but that's not the reason.
00:07:57.000 People are getting like $30 a day.
00:08:00.000 The studios, $15 a day.
00:08:01.000 Con Ed in the upper, in the northeast is out of fucking control.
00:08:08.000 Well, let's just go to somewhere else.
00:08:14.000 Let's go to renewable energy, non-fossil fuels, like wind and solar.
00:08:19.000 You know what percentage of vehicles in the world use oil-based fuel and not solar or anything else, not electric?
00:08:27.000 98%.
00:08:29.000 We've spent $5 trillion in the past 20 years in America trying to get more wind and solar, and we've increased wind and solar by maybe 2% or 3%.
00:08:39.000 It's hopeless.
00:08:40.000 Stop it.
00:08:41.000 They look so fucking dumb.
00:08:43.000 In Costa Rica, the entire skyline is just filled with fucking wind turbines.
00:08:50.000 Windmill, not windmills, but you know, the big giant stupid pieces of shit.
00:08:55.000 It's so frustrating.
00:08:57.000 It's so ugly.
00:08:59.000 Now, you know what they did in Costa Rica?
00:09:01.000 They made a man-made lake and then harnessed the energy from draining that lake into the river system.
00:09:06.000 That actually worked pretty well for them.
00:09:10.000 But wind and solar, can you just stop, please?
00:09:12.000 You look so stupid.
00:09:13.000 It's embarrassing, actually.
00:09:15.000 I'm embarrassed to see those fucking things.
00:09:18.000 Wind energy.
00:09:19.000 There's a whole factory, likely powered by gas and coal, that is on base there, constantly fixing these dumb things.
00:09:30.000 All right.
00:09:34.000 I don't want to have any money.
00:09:36.000 Let's...
00:09:37.000 I want to get into racism in a second here.
00:09:40.000 But before we do, I often talk about the sprinkles, and you guys often send me people who are just humorous.
00:09:46.000 That's not magical.
00:09:48.000 Magical, the magic in humor involves very specific timing.
00:09:54.000 It's a magic thing.
00:09:55.000 I don't know if Ryan has it, actually.
00:09:57.000 That last thing you did, Ryan, with the with the Mets and the Yankees, I was watching it and I was like, it needs one more second at the end.
00:10:09.000 Like a little punctuation at the end.
00:10:11.000 Just like one more.
00:10:14.000 And maybe you're just not funny.
00:10:17.000 That could be the evidence to I'm not funny.
00:10:20.000 That could be it.
00:10:22.000 I know you're not in focus.
00:10:24.000 No.
00:10:26.000 Yes.
00:10:26.000 But that's funny to be not in focus.
00:10:28.000 Nope.
00:10:29.000 Not the 3,000th time.
00:10:31.000 I think one of the best bits, one of the best shticks that we did in a long time, I had to do with.
00:10:42.000 Up with wet jeans anyway.
00:10:44.000 What's the difference?
00:10:50.000 No need for that.
00:10:51.000 There's no need for that.
00:10:53.000 How dare you?
00:10:54.000 You go peepee in your pants.
00:10:55.000 How dare you?
00:10:58.000 That hurts like fucking hell.
00:11:00.000 I'm not going to lie.
00:11:00.000 This is me sleeping as Gavin.
00:11:02.000 That insult hurts like fucking hell.
00:11:04.000 Oh, I'm pissing him.
00:11:06.000 Really good insult that really hurts.
00:11:10.000 Oh, I'm pissing him Gavin.
00:11:11.000 Yep.
00:11:12.000 You got me.
00:11:14.000 It happens.
00:11:15.000 Even drunk, I'm funny.
00:11:16.000 But anyway, back to this old.
00:11:17.000 I'm in a blackout, and I'm still amusing.
00:11:19.000 It's like drunken kung fu.
00:11:22.000 The drunken master.
00:11:23.000 The drunken master.
00:11:24.000 The drunken master.
00:11:24.000 Like, that was hilarious.
00:11:26.000 Drunken master.
00:11:27.000 It's a difficult drunken master.
00:11:29.000 Okay, so I know this ruins a joke.
00:11:32.000 It's like discussing sex.
00:11:34.000 But we're going to ruin the joke by super analyzing it.
00:11:37.000 But I want you to focus on the delivery here of this bit.
00:11:41.000 And I've lost your laugh.
00:11:44.000 You're going to ruin the laugh.
00:11:45.000 But just enjoy the sprinkles, the magic talent.
00:11:49.000 This can't be learned.
00:11:51.000 Even the title, Just Two Guys Enjoying the Swans.
00:11:56.000 Enjoying the Swans.
00:11:57.000 What's better than this, man?
00:11:58.000 Nothing, man.
00:11:59.000 Can't beat it.
00:12:00.000 Can't beat it.
00:12:03.000 We got to figure out how to talk to one of them.
00:12:05.000 I was just thinking, like, this is getting ridiculous.
00:12:06.000 Yeah, I don't really want to be doing this with you.
00:12:08.000 It's too romantic.
00:12:08.000 I mean, if you want the kiss, we could, but.
00:12:11.000 Just two guys enjoying the swans.
00:12:13.000 What's better than this, man?
00:12:14.000 Okay, like.
00:12:16.000 Wait, turn it up.
00:12:17.000 Go back to the beginning.
00:12:18.000 Can you go back to the beginning?
00:12:22.000 Just two guys enjoying the swans.
00:12:26.000 What's better than this, man?
00:12:27.000 Nothing, man.
00:12:28.000 Can't beat it.
00:12:29.000 Can't beat it.
00:12:30.000 Okay, keep going.
00:12:31.000 Beat it.
00:12:32.000 1, 1,000, 2, 1,000.
00:12:34.000 We got to figure out how to talk to a woman.
00:12:36.000 Like three seconds, and then we got to figure out how to talk to a woman.
00:12:40.000 And then he beautifully Venn diagrams his next line on top of that.
00:12:47.000 And the tone is like, we got to figure out how to talk to a woman, man.
00:12:49.000 So it's going down like that.
00:12:51.000 And then he, with his higher voice, goes on top of the end of the, we got to figure out how to talk to a woman with, I was just thinking that.
00:12:59.000 So then you go, all right, that's enough joke for me.
00:13:02.000 You could stop it now, right?
00:13:05.000 And then they give you a little bit more.
00:13:08.000 Just thinking, like, this is getting ridiculous.
00:13:09.000 I don't really want to be doing this later.
00:13:10.000 This is too romantic.
00:13:11.000 I mean, if you want to kiss, we could, but just two guys enjoying the swan.
00:13:15.000 And in a way, that's kind of comedy in twos, right?
00:13:20.000 Just two guys enjoying the swan doesn't count.
00:13:22.000 We really need to figure out just thinking that.
00:13:25.000 That's one.
00:13:27.000 And then if you want to kiss, we could.
00:13:31.000 What?
00:13:31.000 That's two.
00:13:32.000 Comedy comes in threes.
00:13:34.000 Those guys did it in two, and it was still fun.
00:13:36.000 You might count the funny.
00:13:38.000 You might count the sharp edit at the end as the third of the three.
00:13:43.000 Yeah, I think so.
00:13:45.000 Well, it's all really part of that same second.
00:13:47.000 It's kind of stand-up-ish because it's like set up, two guys enjoying the swans, punchline.
00:13:52.000 Yeah, we really got to get the fuck.
00:13:53.000 And then a tag is like, we could kiss if you want.
00:13:56.000 So it's kind of like...
00:13:57.000 I guess it's all one.
00:13:58.000 It's a three-part oneer.
00:14:00.000 Well, what's the three, though?
00:14:02.000 Well, it's like set up, punchline, tag.
00:14:05.000 Hmm.
00:14:07.000 But that doesn't even...
00:14:09.000 I was going to say, like, part of it reminded me of Key and Peel, the overlapping.
00:14:13.000 But they soared into originality at the end.
00:14:16.000 I wonder if they planned that in advance.
00:14:19.000 I think so, yeah.
00:14:20.000 Or if they're, yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:14:21.000 Could have been a couple takes, who knows?
00:14:23.000 Who are those dudes?
00:14:25.000 I don't know.
00:14:25.000 Oh, that's someone else posting it, though.
00:14:27.000 Let's see, TikTok.
00:14:28.000 Usually has a...
00:14:29.000 Wait, wait, wait.
00:14:29.000 Look, look, Vine Energy LOL pickup lines.
00:14:33.000 LOL pickup lines and then also CC box top.
00:14:37.000 So let's see these.
00:14:38.000 This is memes.
00:14:40.000 This might be them.
00:14:42.000 Yeah.
00:14:43.000 So he's a stand-up comedian.
00:14:44.000 Oh, let's hear his shit.
00:14:46.000 Sometimes I'll do this.
00:14:47.000 I'll see a sprinkles.
00:14:49.000 I'll look the guy up and then he won't have the sprinkles.
00:14:53.000 And I realized, oh, he fell into some sprinkles.
00:14:56.000 There's a guy that I follow that's like that too.
00:14:58.000 Every post is very disappointing.
00:15:00.000 Like I saw this Indian dude and he was like, when you get blankets for your friends at a sleepover, and he shows up with the blankets, and there's like a guy sleeping with a TV on him.
00:15:08.000 Someone is using a chair as a blanket.
00:15:10.000 Someone is using someone else as a blanket.
00:15:12.000 And I remember that from being a kid at sleepovers.
00:15:15.000 And then I looked at his other shit and it wasn't funny.
00:15:18.000 And then I realized, oh, it's a meme.
00:15:20.000 Everyone is doing this like blankets at the sleepover thing.
00:15:25.000 Boxtop, first mate prance.
00:15:27.000 He does the he-him thing on his.
00:15:29.000 Oh, that's a bad sign.
00:15:30.000 He-him?
00:15:31.000 He-him.
00:15:32.000 Isn't that redundant?
00:15:34.000 You can only say your pronouns if you have stupid gay pronouns.
00:15:38.000 Y'all got two more minutes of being cute.
00:15:40.000 If it goes any longer, y'all are dying tonight.
00:15:42.000 I'm the night though.
00:15:44.000 Y'all are dying tonight?
00:15:45.000 That's pretty funny.
00:15:49.000 Wait, what does he say about the Confederates?
00:15:51.000 Rep in the Confederacy in Brazil is crazy.
00:15:53.000 Y'all don't even go here.
00:15:55.000 That's pretty funny.
00:15:57.000 Okay, that was fun.
00:15:59.000 Lots of pictures of him on stage.
00:16:05.000 That's funny that he was making fun of that.
00:16:10.000 Okay, can you put in some jokes, dude?
00:16:12.000 Does he not want to give away his jokes for free?
00:16:14.000 We got his TikTok, same thing, box top.
00:16:18.000 Yep, we'll play it.
00:16:21.000 It doesn't link automatically, so we have to find it.
00:16:24.000 TikTok.
00:16:26.000 TikTok.
00:16:27.000 TikTok, as you may know, is Urdu for A-O-K, groovy dude.
00:16:32.000 So if you're ever in a taxi and you want to make the guy laugh, just say, everything is Tikka.
00:16:37.000 Everything is TikTok.
00:16:38.000 And they go, holy shit, you know, it's Urdu.
00:16:41.000 Oh, this is a follow-up to the Swans.
00:16:43.000 Oh, nice.
00:16:44.000 So a sequel.
00:16:44.000 Good bookend to the Swans.
00:16:46.000 This looks beautiful out here, yep.
00:16:47.000 I just, when I said we needed girls, I meant for us.
00:16:50.000 I mean, they look happy, though, so it's like, it's whatever.
00:16:53.000 Bro, they're on a date while we're peddling.
00:16:55.000 This is basically a job.
00:16:56.000 That's fair.
00:16:57.000 I mean, it's more to make them jealous.
00:16:59.000 No.
00:17:01.000 That's just a rule.
00:17:03.000 That's funny.
00:17:03.000 I mean, if you're getting jealous, we could kiss.
00:17:06.000 I like how we spelled kiss, K-I-H-S.
00:17:08.000 I don't know why that's funnier.
00:17:10.000 You want to try one more?
00:17:11.000 No.
00:17:12.000 Okay, okay.
00:17:12.000 Oh, no, no, no, no.
00:17:14.000 Right, right, right.
00:17:14.000 Number one rule of gambling.
00:17:16.000 When you're up, get out.
00:17:19.000 Same with boners.
00:17:21.000 Second you get an erection, leave the bedroom and don't go near your wife or you'll end up fucking her.
00:17:25.000 Interesting.
00:17:27.000 Yes.
00:17:28.000 Okay, let's get in.
00:17:30.000 Let's start the show.
00:17:32.000 Right.
00:17:33.000 And get into some racism.
00:17:35.000 Okay, so these are two good things that we should do.
00:17:37.000 Some great things coming up.
00:17:38.000 I think there's a truck coming from here.
00:17:40.000 No.
00:17:40.000 There is.
00:17:41.000 It comes from here and it goes there.
00:17:42.000 Just about.
00:17:43.000 So I'm going to face here.
00:17:44.000 Yes.
00:17:45.000 And get ready for the truck to come.
00:17:47.000 Because it's coming.
00:17:48.000 Because we're starting the show.
00:17:50.000 Bam.
00:17:50.000 Starting now.
00:17:55.000 Hey, go the bell.
00:17:58.000 Five Trump.
00:17:59.000 Three, two, one.
00:18:04.000 So we just earned some points by liking black people.
00:18:06.000 So now we can go back to zero by discussing what a mess affirmative action is.
00:18:14.000 But let's start with fucking the racism thing.
00:18:22.000 I'm a black female.
00:18:24.000 What other different...
00:18:26.000 What else could I have done to piss you off?
00:18:28.000 Black woman?
00:18:30.000 This is really inconvenient.
00:18:45.000 Affirmative action is going strong.
00:18:48.000 I just, I can't express enough.
00:18:49.000 I was talking to two South Africans at a local tavern, and they were, it's fun to hear people of another culture talk amongst themselves because it's like no holds barred.
00:19:01.000 I notice people from other countries, they don't like talking about their other country.
00:19:04.000 Have you noticed that?
00:19:05.000 Like even today, there was a boxer at the gym and he's like, number one man in Uzbekistan, I hear Larry Barnes say.
00:19:12.000 And I go, oh, you're from Uzbekistan?
00:19:13.000 The chicks are hot there.
00:19:14.000 I like that look.
00:19:15.000 Kind of Asian, kind of not, kind of Russian.
00:19:19.000 Weird, ambiguous brunettes, ethnically ambiguous brunettes, Eabs.
00:19:24.000 And he was like, and then he's wrapping his wraps.
00:19:29.000 And I go, isn't that the place where they steal chicks?
00:19:33.000 Like they put them in a bag?
00:19:35.000 You put your wife in a bag where you just throw her in the car?
00:19:38.000 And he's like, that's Leah Ramini.
00:19:44.000 That's where they're made.
00:19:47.000 Look, this is the Gavs type factory in Uzbekistan.
00:19:53.000 I'd fuck every single person there.
00:19:55.000 She's getting it.
00:19:57.000 They're all getting it.
00:19:59.000 Except for that one on the right who looks like a baby.
00:20:01.000 Oh, that looks like Mercedes.
00:20:04.000 They're all getting it.
00:20:05.000 I'm shtupping her.
00:20:06.000 They got the cheekbones.
00:20:08.000 Like your boy.
00:20:10.000 Like your boy?
00:20:11.000 Yeah.
00:20:11.000 They got my cheekbones.
00:20:12.000 What a weird thing to reference when you're talking about beautiful women.
00:20:15.000 They got the high cheekbones.
00:20:16.000 Look how beautiful they are.
00:20:17.000 They have beautiful big cheekbones like me.
00:20:20.000 Mile-high cheekbones on runway looks like I do.
00:20:25.000 I'm basically her.
00:20:26.000 Yep.
00:20:27.000 Thank you.
00:20:30.000 But yeah, look that up.
00:20:31.000 I think in Uzbekistan, they just steal brides.
00:20:35.000 Like you see a woman you like.
00:20:36.000 I assume you can only do it once, right?
00:20:38.000 You can't have a bunch of brides.
00:20:40.000 And they scream and yell and hate it, but I don't think they do.
00:20:46.000 Somewhere around there, somewhere in Eurasia, they just steal their chick.
00:20:51.000 Sounds awesome to me.
00:20:54.000 That's romantic.
00:20:56.000 Yeah, but Ryan, that's not the most fun thing to do in a video show.
00:21:03.000 Karakalpak bride?
00:21:05.000 No love lost in Karakalpak.
00:21:07.000 Old practice of abducting women persists despite opposition from Uzbekistan Muslim clerics and the forced brides themselves.
00:21:14.000 Love will find a way.
00:21:18.000 Show us video of this, you retard.
00:21:21.000 People don't want to tune into a TV show to look at Wikipedia entries.
00:21:25.000 It's not exciting.
00:21:32.000 Oh, good.
00:21:32.000 Vice, my alma mater.
00:21:34.000 Are we clicking it?
00:21:36.000 Sure.
00:21:37.000 Always feels like, I don't watch Vice shit because it feels like betrayal.
00:21:40.000 Yeah.
00:21:41.000 But I've seen things that made me want to watch it.
00:21:44.000 And I'm like, I can't.
00:21:45.000 How serious are they when they're screaming no?
00:21:48.000 No, please don't.
00:21:50.000 Oh, oh.
00:21:52.000 Oh, that chick's ugly.
00:21:53.000 She's hairy.
00:21:54.000 Dude, she's nude.
00:21:56.000 There's baby balls.
00:21:57.000 I named him baby balls.
00:21:58.000 Oh, yeah, baby balls.
00:22:00.000 Aha, we got you in the hole.
00:22:06.000 I called him baby balls because once he was going to, for 100 bucks, he was going to break a thing of ketchup on his head.
00:22:11.000 And I was like, A, your best case scenario is you knock yourself out.
00:22:15.000 B, the worst case scenario is that glass is like thick, dude.
00:22:20.000 You're going to cut your head open.
00:22:22.000 You could have facial paralysis.
00:22:23.000 So I talked him out of it.
00:22:26.000 We're going to go.
00:22:27.000 His first wife was so hot.
00:22:30.000 Massive tits, but unfortunately, vice culture.
00:22:33.000 They broke up.
00:22:36.000 Kyrgyzstan is a tiny landlocked country next to me.
00:22:38.000 Funny, remember once he was mocking me for believing in IQ?
00:22:42.000 And then, like, a few months later, his wife, because they were still married when I knew them, goes, yeah, well, Thomas has his IQ is 160 or some crazy number.
00:22:51.000 And I was like, oh, so we like IQ when it's in our favor.
00:22:56.000 How convenient.
00:22:57.000 Can we see someone steal a fucking bride, please?
00:23:00.000 I don't need your gay.
00:23:01.000 There we go.
00:23:02.000 How it works is, guy wants to marry a girl, gets a few of his friends together, they grab the girl off the street, then they drive her back to his place, and his mom and aunts try to convince her that marrying their son is the right move, even if he's a total stranger.
00:23:17.000 We'd heard a young East Kyrgyz villager named Kabanti was in the market for a bar.
00:23:21.000 Yeah, that's not grand larceny.
00:23:22.000 That's just a mystic.
00:23:24.000 Well, it's not worth it.
00:23:25.000 Like, I've seen some girls, like, fucking, what's her name?
00:23:27.000 Kim Taylor Bennett.
00:23:29.000 Like, I could kidnap her and understand that the first year or two, she's going to be pretty sad.
00:23:36.000 But eventually, with treats and cakes and TV privileges and even a walk, I let her go for a walk month four.
00:23:47.000 Dang.
00:23:48.000 Yeah.
00:23:49.000 Eventually she'd learn to love me.
00:23:51.000 Budding photographers.
00:23:53.000 Let's get back to racism, please.
00:23:55.000 Oh, yes.
00:23:55.000 So affirmative action, yes.
00:23:58.000 I like how we assume that affirmative action is still what the original idea was, which is poor people who deserve these jobs finally get them and we're evening it out.
00:24:10.000 And to go back to the South African thing I started this with, I overheard two South Africans saying, you know the GEDs?
00:24:15.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:24:16.000 When were you last back home?
00:24:18.000 I was back home.
00:24:19.000 What gives you the right to ask me when I was back home?
00:24:21.000 And he goes, yeah, the GEDs for your high school diploma, it was down to 40%.
00:24:28.000 You needed a 40 out of 100 to get one.
00:24:31.000 And he goes, you know what it is now?
00:24:32.000 Well, zero.
00:24:34.000 I've told you this before, but zero to get a GED in South Africa.
00:24:39.000 In other words, it means nothing.
00:24:40.000 And we're headed there with this bullshit affirmative action.
00:24:43.000 So check out these APOCs, African-American people of color, who are bragging trends like this will get people killed.
00:24:52.000 Just wait until they start ramping this up with fields like engineering.
00:24:55.000 Yeah, or medicine, getting accepted into law school with a low LSAT and GPA.
00:25:00.000 Full tuition scholarship.
00:25:05.000 Good.
00:25:06.000 Is this what affirmative action was supposed to do?
00:25:08.000 Made a C in chemistry, got put out of honors program on technicality, barely did research, didn't shadow.
00:25:14.000 GPA was good, but could have been better.
00:25:15.000 Professors wouldn't give me the time of day.
00:25:17.000 Mediocre MCAT.
00:25:19.000 Applied the very last day.
00:25:21.000 Was told I wouldn't get into med school.
00:25:23.000 Current MS3.
00:25:25.000 Can you not work on me?
00:25:26.000 Like what this says to me is if you see a black doctor, say, can I get a second opinion, please?
00:25:32.000 I saw on Twitter that you guys cheat.
00:25:36.000 Like real black doctors who deserve to be there must not be happy with this trend.
00:25:40.000 And then there's a whole bunch.
00:25:41.000 Getting accepted, law school, low LSATs.
00:25:45.000 142, low LSAT score.
00:25:48.000 Getting accepted in law school, low LSAT score.
00:25:51.000 Please do not waste your time applying to law schools.
00:25:54.000 How to get into law school with low GPA.
00:25:57.000 All black women.
00:25:59.000 Okay.
00:26:00.000 Now they're anesthesiologists.
00:26:03.000 Okay, sir, count backwards from 10 because I think you're going to be out for this operation.
00:26:08.000 Or you might be awake.
00:26:10.000 You might wake up in the middle.
00:26:11.000 Or you might die.
00:26:13.000 Oh, hi, I'm an engineer.
00:26:15.000 I'm designing this crucial piece of a Boeing 747.
00:26:19.000 Hope I get it right.
00:26:20.000 I don't deserve to be here.
00:26:23.000 What a tangled web we weave.
00:26:25.000 Look at this guy.
00:26:26.000 This poor guy's like, why most won't make it 175 plus, and that's going to hold you back.
00:26:32.000 I had 177.
00:26:34.000 Didn't work for me.
00:26:37.000 What you could do to get a lot of money.
00:26:38.000 Look how much Adderall he had to take to get into law school.
00:26:41.000 This is what white males have to do to compete with affirmative action.
00:26:45.000 They have to eat a bowl of cereal that's Adderall.
00:26:49.000 He took so much Adderall, he looks like Gypsy Crusader.
00:26:52.000 I don't know how that works.
00:26:53.000 He took so much Adderall, he has four eyebrows.
00:27:02.000 I thought this was interesting, saying the quiet part out loud.
00:27:06.000 If you recall, at Charlottesville, those stupid, evil Nazis were marching with tiki torches, and they were saying Jews will not replace us.
00:27:13.000 The indication was that Jews are for open borders and for demographic change in this country because they don't like, they don't consider themselves white and they hate white people.
00:27:25.000 So they want to breed white people out of existence.
00:27:28.000 Jews want that.
00:27:29.000 This is what they said.
00:27:32.000 Then you see this article, 1.6.
00:27:36.000 Wait, is that it?
00:27:42.000 That's the link?
00:27:44.000 Oh, shit.
00:27:47.000 Klaus Arminus.
00:27:49.000 Okay.
00:27:50.000 Well, you can show that while I get you this thing.
00:27:53.000 Is this our buddy Nas?
00:27:54.000 This is our buddy Nas talking about how he went to London and there's not a lot of white people there.
00:27:59.000 It's awesome.
00:28:05.000 If it isn't obvious, I'm not white.
00:28:08.000 I'm brown.
00:28:09.000 You're white.
00:28:10.000 Growing up in the Middle East, I thought white people lived in places like London.
00:28:18.000 But now that I'm a grown-up in London, I realized I was wrong.
00:28:24.000 I am inbred.
00:28:25.000 I'm a grown-up.
00:28:27.000 I have the IQ of a fish.
00:28:29.000 Who says I'm a grown-up?
00:28:32.000 Who wears a sweatshirt of how close they are to death every day?
00:28:38.000 Kind of glum, is it not?
00:28:40.000 Was wrong.
00:28:42.000 London is not white.
00:28:43.000 Turns out, British white people in London are the minority.
00:28:48.000 And the majority is India.
00:28:50.000 France.
00:28:51.000 People from all races and colors.
00:28:53.000 This place has 300 languages spoken of.
00:29:13.000 You know what's funny?
00:29:14.000 Stop.
00:29:15.000 The only two groups that have really assimilated in London are Jamaicans and Indians.
00:29:21.000 And that's because they're former British colonies who grew up on British culture.
00:29:28.000 Pakistanis, not so much.
00:29:31.000 The inbreeding in the Muslim world is not good for their assimilation.
00:29:36.000 And it's ironically why Nasir is such a fucking retard, because he's Palestinian.
00:29:40.000 It's not a joke.
00:29:44.000 Go ahead.
00:29:45.000 Former British clerks.
00:29:58.000 That's a great theory.
00:29:59.000 I feel that way about women.
00:30:01.000 The more men a woman spreads her legs for, the more men can call her their girlfriend.
00:30:08.000 And I think I know why.
00:30:10.000 Yeah.
00:30:12.000 By the way, I saw Jackass last night.
00:30:14.000 I know I'm a little late to the game.
00:30:16.000 But now that they're getting woke, they have women and blacks involved.
00:30:20.000 And I didn't realize it before, but it's weird to see blacks getting shot at with paintball guns and chased with tanks.
00:30:28.000 Or falling or wiping out and everyone laughing at them wipe out because we've been conditioned to see them as victims.
00:30:35.000 And to have a bunch of white people laughing.
00:30:39.000 And then you realize, wait a minute, why am I so comfortable seeing a guy kicked in the balls?
00:30:45.000 Like, they have one of the best heavyweight boxers in the world punch this dude in the nuts.
00:30:51.000 And it's funny because the boxer's black and the guy's white.
00:30:54.000 But if the guy was white and the boxer was white and the guy was black, you'd be like, that'd be really odd.
00:31:01.000 So it's a weird world where we are, in the name of equality, we're introducing blacks to all the bad stuff.
00:31:11.000 And I think white people are the only people who can take getting kicked in the nuts and thrown off a cliff and shot out of a cannon.
00:31:19.000 We're the Vikings originally.
00:31:21.000 We're a resilient bunch.
00:31:24.000 But when we see it happening to blacks, we go, that's mean.
00:31:28.000 It's like what I always say about farting.
00:31:30.000 My kids can fart on me, no problem.
00:31:32.000 They fart on mom.
00:31:33.000 They're losing screen time.
00:31:34.000 That's a biggie.
00:31:37.000 It's sort of like this thing, Bridgeport.
00:31:39.000 Go to 1-2.
00:31:40.000 Have you seen this?
00:31:44.000 They're reinventing England.
00:31:45.000 Queen Charlotte, I guess she was like around the time of Mary Antoinette.
00:31:50.000 Clearly a white woman.
00:31:52.000 This is 1-2.
00:31:53.000 And she's portrayed as an old black lady in this show.
00:31:57.000 And it's blacks wanting to be aristocrats.
00:32:00.000 Now, Queen Charlotte did have blacks around her.
00:32:02.000 She owned them.
00:32:05.000 So the problem with putting blacks, look, that woman, Queen Charlotte, was white and she had plenty of black servants that she owned.
00:32:14.000 So by making these people black, you're making them okay with the fact, like that woman, the real woman, they all had black helpers, servants, whatever.
00:32:23.000 So these people, these black aristocrats are okay with slavery.
00:32:28.000 Oops.
00:32:30.000 What a tangled web we weave when we enforce equality.
00:32:34.000 Incompetent doctors, lawyers.
00:32:38.000 We have old aristocrats complicit with slavery.
00:32:45.000 Come here, old friends.
00:32:46.000 This is my sister.
00:32:48.000 Duke.
00:32:49.000 I would recognize him anyway.
00:32:50.000 It's all about blacks humping white girls.
00:32:53.000 It's all about mixed-race couples.
00:32:56.000 Okay, go to the next one.
00:32:57.000 Look at Queen Charlotte.
00:33:00.000 Wait, in Wikipedia, I think there's a good picture of her.
00:33:02.000 Maybe it's 1-4.
00:33:04.000 Yeah, go to 1-4.
00:33:07.000 The only black person that she was remotely associated with is serving her.
00:33:10.000 Go to the right-hand side?
00:33:11.000 Yeah.
00:33:12.000 There she is.
00:33:13.000 That's a black woman, according to...
00:33:15.000 This is Shonda Rhimes, the one who did all these other stupid fucking Netflix shows where she crowbars black people into them.
00:33:24.000 What are you doing?
00:33:26.000 Oh.
00:33:27.000 Go to the other pictures, though.
00:33:30.000 From that same Wikipedia.
00:33:31.000 Keep going.
00:33:34.000 That's kind of blackish.
00:33:37.000 No.
00:33:38.000 You don't see a little.
00:33:40.000 I guess not.
00:33:41.000 I saw a picture with a little black servant.
00:33:42.000 I thought it was on that.
00:33:45.000 Anyway.
00:33:50.000 Speaking of the depiction of African Americans in film and television, I want to take him.
00:33:56.000 There you go.
00:33:57.000 Oh, there he is.
00:33:58.000 You know what's funny?
00:33:58.000 I didn't see him before.
00:34:01.000 Because he wasn't smiling.
00:34:02.000 Yeah.
00:34:03.000 He wasn't going like this.
00:34:07.000 That's terrible.
00:34:09.000 It's not terrible.
00:34:10.000 You know, Steve Saylor says there might be some sort of historical merit to this.
00:34:14.000 Right.
00:34:14.000 Because before electricity, you told stories around the campfire in the dark.
00:34:19.000 And if you want to emote, we need to see you.
00:34:22.000 So it might make more sense to be going like this when you're telling a story to help convey it.
00:34:28.000 You're like, happy.
00:34:30.000 So maybe this is a natural evolution of storytelling.
00:34:34.000 Who knows?
00:34:35.000 Why is everybody in your stories always happy, Leroy?
00:34:41.000 Okay, let's do a green screen about epochs.
00:34:45.000 Apochs.
00:34:46.000 Epochs.
00:34:47.000 Epochs.
00:35:02.000 I just want to sort of have a little moment to talk to NASA and the Fields Medal.
00:35:08.000 The area of science as it applies in our day-to-day seems to have forgotten African Americans.
00:35:14.000 And it's obvious to me that people of color would make great astronauts, great mathematicians.
00:35:21.000 We have Terrence Howard doing talks at Oxford about the Otis symbos.
00:35:27.000 Yet, if you look at, like, look at this Cobalt JBL team from NASA.
00:35:34.000 Look at these guys.
00:35:35.000 Zoom in on them.
00:35:36.000 This is what NASA thinks science is in this day and age.
00:35:41.000 One black dude.
00:35:43.000 And they're very careful with their pictures because they're aware of their diversity problem.
00:35:48.000 So this is probably the most diverse picture you can find.
00:35:51.000 Every time you look at NASA, they try to drum up as many women and they'll do a thing like, here's our whole staff.
00:35:57.000 And they'll throw in the fucking cafeteria staff and stuff to get their numbers up.
00:36:00.000 But it is disgusting, deplorable, and quite frankly, sad how few people of color there are at this space and aeronautics company.
00:36:09.000 It makes you think that they don't think black people are worthy.
00:36:12.000 And I've also noticed this in the Fields Medal.
00:36:14.000 The Fields Medal is basically the Nobel Peace Prize for mathematics.
00:36:19.000 We finally got a pachyderm in there, some Indian dude, New Delhi born mathematics.
00:36:26.000 But that's fairly rare.
00:36:28.000 It's usually whites.
00:36:29.000 It's usually Orientals.
00:36:32.000 It's never black people.
00:36:34.000 Do the people at Fields think that black people aren't capable of math?
00:36:38.000 Is that the message here?
00:36:39.000 Scroll down.
00:36:41.000 You'll see other pictures of the winners.
00:36:43.000 There's the guy.
00:36:44.000 Look at that.
00:36:45.000 White dude, white dude, Indian guy.
00:36:47.000 Are there any more pics?
00:36:48.000 I bet there's maybe a Chinese guy.
00:36:50.000 No, that's it.
00:36:52.000 So I just want to point out how embarrassing this is and how many opportunities there are for these companies to recognize the brilliance of blacks.
00:37:03.000 And we need go no further than popular film and yeah, popular film.
00:37:09.000 Number one, Donald Glover in The Martian.
00:37:13.000 Look at this guy.
00:37:14.000 He was doing so much math, he passed out.
00:37:19.000 Has anyone at NASA ever passed out from mathematics before?
00:37:23.000 I don't think so.
00:37:25.000 Go ahead, one.
00:37:26.000 He's the guy, by the way.
00:37:28.000 He played Richie Purnell of Astrodynamics.
00:37:32.000 Look at this.
00:37:34.000 He's asleep from doing math.
00:37:38.000 Rich.
00:37:41.000 Rich.
00:37:42.000 That's the nerdy guy from Freaks and Geeks, I think.
00:37:44.000 Everyone's fine with him.
00:37:46.000 Sorry, but they're asking for the probe courses.
00:37:48.000 What time is it?
00:37:50.000 It's 3.42.
00:37:57.000 Look, I know we're coming at this backwards, but we can't come into a firm line.
00:38:01.000 Look at all the computer stuff he's doing.
00:38:04.000 It's all right.
00:38:06.000 All 25 models for long.
00:38:07.000 By the way, this is the movie where he figures out we can't turn around and come back.
00:38:10.000 We're going to have to slingshot around the Earth.
00:38:12.000 But he can't explain it to people because it's too brilliant for them.
00:38:17.000 Why isn't he...
00:38:18.000 Why?
00:38:18.000 Where are the Donald Glovers of the world in NASA?
00:38:23.000 Also, another example.
00:38:25.000 In the movie FF9, Ludacris works out mathematically.
00:38:31.000 Turn it up.
00:38:36.000 Numbers don't lie.
00:38:41.000 With my ceramic polymer coating, you're going to be just fine.
00:38:46.000 But this is a black person who figured out how to get into outer space in an old, I don't know what that is, a pinto?
00:38:52.000 And they get so far up in outer space that they destroy a satellite that was going to destroy the world.
00:38:59.000 Look at this.
00:39:06.000 compression differential.
00:39:07.000 They know about compression differential.
00:39:09.000 And what is the motto of Ludacris in this film?
00:39:12.000 Numbers don't lie.
00:39:13.000 Hey, Fields Medals, where's this guy?
00:39:17.000 Number three.
00:39:19.000 Who can forget Janelle Monet in Hidden Figures, my favorite film on this subject.
00:39:24.000 I'm often criticized for referencing it too often, especially when I discuss it with Anthony Cumia, who's also very fond of the depiction of the various scientists.
00:39:32.000 She's playing, of course, Mary Jackson, who was not just a math janitor.
00:39:37.000 Stop saying that.
00:39:38.000 She did a lot more.
00:39:39.000 For example, in this scene, she figures out...
00:39:43.000 What does she figure out again?
00:39:44.000 Play it.
00:39:46.000 Shield erosion occurs on the posterior side abutting the retro boosters.
00:39:52.000 Conclusion.
00:39:56.000 The area closest to the boosters is closest to the heat.
00:40:00.000 Coupled with rising temperature on re-entry, the contact softens.
00:40:05.000 We could consider another fastener other than the boats.
00:40:11.000 Yes.
00:40:13.000 Yes.
00:40:14.000 Brilliant.
00:40:19.000 There is another opening in the engineer training program.
00:40:23.000 Flathead rivets would reduce wind drag.
00:40:26.000 Mary, a person with engineers' mind should be an engineer.
00:40:30.000 You can't be a computer the rest of your life.
00:40:32.000 Mr. Zelensky, I'm a Negro woman.
00:40:36.000 I'm not going to entertain the impossible.
00:40:38.000 And I'm a Polish Jew whose parents died in a Nazi prison camp.
00:40:42.000 Now I'm standing beneath a spaceship.
00:40:44.000 Isn't going to be an option.
00:40:48.000 Didn't America get all their rocket scientists from Nazi Germany?
00:40:52.000 Now you just switch them over into Polish Jews?
00:40:54.000 Anyway, that's for another day.
00:40:56.000 He must not like his co-workers at all.
00:41:00.000 Are you comfortable around the Nazis that you work with, my friend?
00:41:06.000 Another brilliant mathematician, scientist, space guy, genius is Joe Morton in Terminator 2.
00:41:12.000 He played Miles Dyson.
00:41:14.000 This guy was so smart, he almost destroyed the world.
00:41:18.000 This might be why you don't see many blacks in engineering in real life, because they're scared their high IQs will destroy the entire planet.
00:41:24.000 Look at this.
00:41:27.000 Mr. Dyson!
00:41:29.000 Mr. Dyson!
00:41:30.000 Lots of scientists falling with garbage cans all over the place.
00:41:33.000 Notice that?
00:41:34.000 Mr. Dyson.
00:41:35.000 There he is.
00:41:37.000 He's running another series this afternoon, and you have to sign for the it.
00:41:41.000 You have to sign it out.
00:41:42.000 Okay, come on, I guess.
00:41:46.000 Listen, Mr. Dyson, I know I haven't been here that long, but I was wondering if you could tell me.
00:41:50.000 I mean, if you know.
00:41:51.000 Know what?
00:41:52.000 Well, if you know where it came from.
00:41:55.000 You know why I asked them that very same question once, and you know what they told me?
00:41:58.000 Don't ask.
00:42:02.000 This man's brain ended Earth.
00:42:05.000 He made computers so smart he outsmarted us and started killing us.
00:42:11.000 Less than three, two, one.
00:42:13.000 And finally!
00:42:16.000 Speaking of permanently changing the world with robots, we have Eric Andre in Mitchell's vs.
00:42:21.000 the Machines.
00:42:23.000 Just like Miles Dyson, he created robots that were too smart and became dangerous.
00:42:28.000 His character is Mark Bowman.
00:42:30.000 Let's check him out.
00:42:35.000 Oh, that's good drone footage.
00:42:51.000 He betrays her.
00:42:52.000 By the way, that's the problem with this AI.
00:42:56.000 By the way, have you heard this rumor that AI is racist?
00:42:59.000 Yes.
00:43:00.000 Are mirrors racist?
00:43:02.000 It thinks that black women are men.
00:43:04.000 That was one of them.
00:43:05.000 It's racist.
00:43:07.000 Math is clearly racist.
00:43:13.000 I've always thought of you as like family to me.
00:43:16.000 Seriously.
00:43:17.000 I always felt that way too, Mark.
00:43:20.000 What a very black mirror, isn't it?
00:43:22.000 I will never forget you, Pal.
00:43:24.000 Ladies and gentlemen, Mark, Bowman!
00:43:26.000 Wish me luck!
00:43:28.000 Bowman!
00:43:31.000 Anyway, this guy, if you've seen the movie, he says we're going to update our phones to now robots.
00:43:38.000 He throws that phone away and he maybe skip ahead a little bit.
00:43:43.000 The phone wants revenge, by the way, and she gets it.
00:43:46.000 Skip ahead.
00:43:47.000 And look at the robots this black man made.
00:43:49.000 They clean your room.
00:43:52.000 More?
00:43:53.000 You've seen this, right, Ryan?
00:43:54.000 You watch children's shows.
00:43:56.000 I did not watch this one.
00:43:57.000 Oh, is it too mature for you?
00:43:59.000 No.
00:44:01.000 Look, he made those.
00:44:02.000 Hey, NASA, look what they can do with books.
00:44:05.000 Look at that.
00:44:06.000 They chop up all the vegetables in midair.
00:44:09.000 So anyway, I don't understand why reality seems to have a problem with what TV and movies have shown us to be clearly scientific facts.
00:44:33.000 Was that proper grammar?
00:44:36.000 The movies have shown us to be clearly scientific facts.
00:44:40.000 Clearly scientifically factual.
00:44:44.000 You know, honorable mention, another Disney movie.
00:44:46.000 I just happened upon it.
00:44:49.000 Ron's Gone Wrong.
00:44:51.000 The super genius who creates the program for this thing is a black kid.
00:44:57.000 Oh, really?
00:44:58.000 Yeah, and then the evil white guy is like, no, we have to fucking do bad shit with it.
00:45:04.000 And he's like, no, but chill, yo.
00:45:07.000 And then I'm going to...
00:45:08.000 You did see that one, though.
00:45:10.000 Yes.
00:45:11.000 Ryan, I don't think...
00:45:12.000 I think you avoided Mitchell's vs.
00:45:14.000 the Machines because it's too old for you.
00:45:18.000 It's too mature.
00:45:19.000 This one's mature.
00:45:20.000 There's friendship beginning.
00:45:23.000 Ron is going wrong.
00:45:24.000 Wrong is not a positive thing.
00:45:25.000 That's a negative thing.
00:45:27.000 That's very adult.
00:45:29.000 Nope.
00:45:30.000 All movies have conflict, you fucking dart.
00:45:36.000 So, yeah, that was amusing.
00:45:41.000 Got so much to cover here.
00:45:43.000 Let's end racism for today.
00:45:46.000 Right?
00:45:46.000 Did you show the Jews will not replace us thing that I sent you?
00:45:51.000 Nope, not yet.
00:45:51.000 We teed that up and we never hit the ball.
00:45:54.000 It was teed but never whacked.
00:45:58.000 This is insane to me because this is exactly what the Tiki Torch guys were saying.
00:46:04.000 So I'm sitting here trying to make sure no proud boys ever become Nazis and arguing with anti-Semites about why they're wrong.
00:46:12.000 And then you guys go and do this.
00:46:14.000 You make my job pretty hard.
00:46:15.000 You have a man in a yarmulke standing with people of color.
00:46:20.000 He's the only white guy there.
00:46:22.000 And he's looking at these people having a baby and saying, that's white supremacy.
00:46:28.000 Stop it.
00:46:29.000 In these times of reckoning, we need to stand united against all forms of racism and white supremacy.
00:46:37.000 The next generation will determine the fate of this country, and it's up to us to decide what kind of future we want.
00:46:47.000 Wow.
00:46:48.000 Wow.
00:46:49.000 That's pretty nuts.
00:46:51.000 You could get canceled for saying that.
00:46:53.000 Like for saying that's what they want.
00:46:56.000 If you made that a fake article, people go, fuck you.
00:46:59.000 No one's saying that.
00:47:01.000 There it is.
00:47:03.000 Not a good look.
00:47:04.000 Nobody's overtly saying that.
00:47:07.000 Yeah.
00:47:07.000 No one's supposed to say that out loud.
00:47:09.000 Stop revealing the magic trick.
00:47:13.000 All right.
00:47:13.000 Let's jump over to some Proud Boys.
00:47:21.000 Stand back.
00:47:22.000 Stand by.
00:47:23.000 Mount Boys Boy.
00:47:28.000 Somebody's got to do something about Antifa and the left.
00:47:31.000 Antifa is an idea, not an organization.
00:47:33.000 You got it, Matt Bulletin.
00:47:40.000 Stand by.
00:47:41.000 Stand by.
00:47:42.000 Stand by.
00:47:44.000 Stand black.
00:47:45.000 Stand black.
00:47:47.000 So I talked to Brandon Vaughan last night.
00:47:49.000 If you recall on yesterday's show, Brandon Vaughn was the guy who got into a fight at a pro-Israeli rally in 2017.
00:47:59.000 He was choked out.
00:48:01.000 I talked to the guy on the phone.
00:48:02.000 He was having his first cheeseburger and beer in two months.
00:48:05.000 He did a month in Canadian jail and a month in D.C. jail.
00:48:10.000 He goes, I was the only white guy there.
00:48:12.000 Everyone was there for murder, attempted murder.
00:48:15.000 I'm there.
00:48:15.000 I had to lie.
00:48:17.000 I said I was there for firearm possession and attempted murder or something.
00:48:22.000 Because the real reason I'm there is a guy choked me out, so I punched him in the head and knocked him to the ground.
00:48:28.000 And then the Jewish Defense League used their poles and stuff and kicked the shit out of him when he was already on the ground.
00:48:35.000 But I wasn't even arrested.
00:48:37.000 I just hung out after because the cops saw the guy choked me and they saw me go bonk, bonk, shove.
00:48:44.000 Anyway, amongst all those murderers, he had to pretend to be worse than he was.
00:48:47.000 So he's been in there for two months.
00:48:49.000 He was facing 15 years.
00:48:52.000 He was about to kill himself because he's not the kind of guy who can handle 15 years.
00:48:58.000 I don't think I am either.
00:48:59.000 Very few of us are.
00:49:01.000 And then he goes to court, I forget when it was, maybe Friday, and they said, misdemeanor.
00:49:08.000 He has a $500 fine and he has to stay out of trouble for three years.
00:49:12.000 That's it.
00:49:14.000 That's all.
00:49:15.000 Jaywalking.
00:49:17.000 So he considered fighting it many times, but no, truth is not on your side.
00:49:23.000 And they only, he wasn't a Proud Boy when he committed this act.
00:49:27.000 He was just a hoser.
00:49:28.000 He's still a hoser.
00:49:29.000 But he joined the Proud Boys afterwards.
00:49:32.000 Proud Boy started kicking ass in Ottawa.
00:49:35.000 And that's when they decided we have to clamp down on him.
00:49:38.000 And then turned the whole thing retroactively into a hate crime that he needed to be arrested for.
00:49:42.000 Now, you need to know a little bit about my hometown of Ottawa, Canada.
00:49:47.000 They had a massive influx of Somalians, right?
00:49:51.000 And it was a complete fucking failure.
00:49:54.000 They call them Mollies in Ottawa.
00:49:56.000 And what Mollies do is they'll steal your skateboard, they'll steal your weed, they'll beat you up, you fight back, and then that day, four minivans show up of Mollies of all ages, usually mid-20s, to kick the shit out of the person.
00:50:12.000 The police do nothing, and the media totally ignores it.
00:50:16.000 Why?
00:50:17.000 Because this was Trudeau's experiment.
00:50:19.000 It's exactly like Britain.
00:50:21.000 Tony Blair imported a bunch of Muslims to fuck with the working class, as Nigel Farage put it, and it worked.
00:50:30.000 But it's embarrassing because there's grooming gangs, there's violence.
00:50:34.000 Check out Tommy Robinson's series, The Rape of Britain.
00:50:38.000 It's been an abject failure.
00:50:39.000 So what do you do about a failure?
00:50:41.000 Well, you hide it.
00:50:43.000 And so the CBC, sorry, the BBC, the British Broadcasting Corporation, runs the news there.
00:50:50.000 So they just totally ignore the Muslim problem.
00:50:52.000 They got Sidi Khan further hiding it, deballing the police, and they make sure that no one knows the problem.
00:50:59.000 Exact same story is true in Ottawa.
00:51:04.000 I mean, Canada's modeled after Great Britain.
00:51:08.000 In fact, one of the reasons Brandon was able to keep his passport is because there's a new law that says a passport is actually property of the Queen of England, Queen of Britain, Queen Elizabeth.
00:51:20.000 And they invented that law for Omar Kader, the terrorist who killed an American soldier and was rewarded $10 million from Justin Trudeau for the inconvenience of going to Guantanamo Bay for being guilty of terrorism.
00:51:36.000 That second part is, it was just inconvenient that he went to Guantanamo Bay because he was just a child.
00:51:41.000 He's only, what, 17?
00:51:43.000 Poor kid.
00:51:44.000 Poor murderer.
00:51:45.000 Poor terrorist.
00:51:48.000 Anyway, so Brandon Vaughn grew up fighting Muslim kids, gangs would come to his school.
00:51:54.000 And there's zero reporting about this anywhere in Canada.
00:51:57.000 In fact, Trudeau spends tons of money to hide it.
00:52:00.000 And who does he spend money on?
00:52:02.000 Evan Baal Gord is his name.
00:52:06.000 And he proudly calls himself Antifa.
00:52:09.000 He is the executive director of the Canadian Anti-Hate Network, which Trudeau rewarded $45 million, an anti-fascist nonprofit dedicated to countering, monitoring, exposing the far right.
00:52:21.000 He was formerly an investigative journalist and VP of the Canadian Association of Journalists.
00:52:26.000 Look at this child.
00:52:28.000 This little kid awarded tens of millions of dollars to fight hate.
00:52:34.000 And you know what fight hate means in Canada?
00:52:36.000 Hide the problems with diversity.
00:52:39.000 Hide our incompetence.
00:52:41.000 Hide the problem with Somali gangs.
00:52:45.000 And he was a big part of getting Brandon Vaughan arrested, getting Proud Boys designated a terrorist group.
00:52:53.000 Another cunt that's behind all this is Bernie Farber of the Canadian Jewish Congress.
00:53:00.000 Oh, we didn't show this.
00:53:02.000 Yeah, I know, Ryan.
00:53:04.000 Okay.
00:53:06.000 That's 29C.
00:53:11.000 Look at this fucking clown.
00:53:12.000 I said earlier, don't show Wikipedia, and I got all these.
00:53:15.000 And you know what's funny about the Canadian Jewish Congress?
00:53:18.000 It was Canadian Jewish groups in the 80s when I lived there that created Nazi skinheads.
00:53:26.000 They got $7 million, fucking birdseed compared to the $45 million they're getting these days, to catch Nazis.
00:53:35.000 Problem being there were none.
00:53:36.000 So they started a thing called Heritage Foundation, and this put out propaganda saying the white race is this, white race is that.
00:53:43.000 And they ended up getting a bunch of homeless kids and orphans and Pepsis, French Canadians, to fall for it.
00:53:50.000 And the next thing you know, when I was 18, 16, 17, when I was a teenager in Ottawa, there was Nazi skin heads everywhere.
00:53:58.000 Read my book, Death the Cool.
00:54:01.000 Wolf had a rapier in his cane.
00:54:03.000 Francois had a fucking Klansman galloping through the woods on his back.
00:54:10.000 His entire back was a Klan rally.
00:54:12.000 Joff would go down south to the States and bring back machine guns.
00:54:17.000 He was a one-man militia, all thanks to the Canadian Jewish Congress creating hate.
00:54:23.000 And it's funny because this guy, even Balgord, says that his new group is modeled after the SPLC.
00:54:29.000 And what does the SPLC do?
00:54:31.000 They create hate where there was none.
00:54:36.000 It's fucking fascinating.
00:54:39.000 These idiots are the biggest danger to our society, and they're all globalists.
00:54:44.000 In fact, this guy, Evan Balgord, has a degree in global journalism.
00:54:50.000 Whatever the fuck that means.
00:54:52.000 It means globalism.
00:54:53.000 These people are globalists and they're Bolsheviks.
00:54:55.000 Bernie Farber supports Muslims who are anti-Semitic.
00:55:00.000 That's how badly they push this diversity crap at the risk of exterminating their own people.
00:55:05.000 Bernie Farber is anti-Israel.
00:55:08.000 And he promotes this Iman whose name is Ayman El-Kassare.
00:55:14.000 El-Kassarawi.
00:55:17.000 And Culture said the hardest part about our audiobooks is getting all these fucking Muslim names right.
00:55:24.000 And this guy said, we have to purify Al-Aska Mosque from the filth of the Jews.
00:55:31.000 That's who Bernie Farber's defending.
00:55:34.000 He's also out to get our friend Brandon Vaughn, who just escaped suicide and death and 15 years in prison for fighting a guy who choked him.
00:55:45.000 Is that justice here?
00:55:47.000 Unfucking believable.
00:55:50.000 All right.
00:55:52.000 Let's take a quick look at Antifa.
00:55:59.000 And then we'll go to the mailbag.
00:56:04.000 You fucking wife man!
00:56:06.000 You've never experienced that like me in your entire money!
00:56:09.000 You're a leader of life!
00:56:12.000 Look at these fucking horrible, weak losers!
00:56:16.000 Fuck your dad!
00:56:18.000 Those have worked forces.
00:56:23.000 This chick is suing Chad Loader.
00:56:25.000 Remember Chad Loader?
00:56:26.000 He's like the...
00:56:27.000 He's the top of Antifa, I would say.
00:56:30.000 The main dude.
00:56:33.000 They always have a disgusting home life.
00:56:34.000 I think he's a single dad or something.
00:56:36.000 Who knows what the fuck?
00:56:38.000 But a UCLA Masters in Public Policy alumni is suing Antifa member Chad Loader in L.A. County for falsely claiming she's a convicted burglar and vandal.
00:56:46.000 She says she lost a work contract as a result of his defamatory statements that show up first on a Google search of her name.
00:56:53.000 That seems pretty cut and dry, right?
00:56:57.000 Look at his fucking eyebrows.
00:57:00.000 What a freak.
00:57:01.000 Looks like that Asian filter I use.
00:57:03.000 Yeah, it does.
00:57:04.000 Like a weird long upper lip, weird eyebrows.
00:57:09.000 Go to 31A.
00:57:11.000 So that's good.
00:57:12.000 We're seeing them getting...
00:57:13.000 We're employing lawfare because there's no other options left.
00:57:16.000 I mean, you saw what happened to Brendan Vaughan.
00:57:18.000 So the law doesn't trust us.
00:57:20.000 We get arrested.
00:57:21.000 We can't go by normal routes.
00:57:23.000 So wait, hold on a second here.
00:57:27.000 Pause that.
00:57:28.000 So you want to play law games?
00:57:30.000 Okay, we'll play law games.
00:57:32.000 We're left with lawfare.
00:57:33.000 So we've got Christian Ek su, anti-fash Gordon in upstate New York getting sued, and now we have Chad Loader.
00:57:39.000 It's all great news.
00:57:40.000 But I thought this was interesting.
00:57:42.000 I don't understand why they say Jordan Peterson started crying.
00:57:45.000 That's just false.
00:57:46.000 But this was an interesting take on Antifa.
00:57:49.000 I wanted to ask you about the, based on your knowledge, your background, your clinical experience, what is the psychology of mom violence?
00:58:01.000 When I see it, I don't even recognize some of these.
00:58:08.000 They seem animalistic is what I mean.
00:58:12.000 No, they're worse than animals.
00:58:14.000 They're worse than animals, because animals, they just kill to eat.
00:58:18.000 Human beings, they have a twist in them that makes them far worse than animals when they really get going.
00:58:23.000 Well, I think it's, I think, you really want to know what I think?
00:58:26.000 I think it's revenge against God for the crime of being.
00:58:31.000 That's really what I think.
00:58:34.000 It's Cain and Cain and Abel.
00:58:36.000 It's like, oh, Abel's your guy, eh?
00:58:39.000 God, what if I take him out in the field and beat him to death?
00:58:42.000 How do you feel about that?
00:58:44.000 All my sacrifices went unrewarded.
00:58:50.000 Yeah.
00:58:50.000 It's like...
00:58:52.000 Yeah, that's what it is at the bottom of the hell of things.
00:59:01.000 I was hardly crying.
00:59:02.000 I think that's too intellectual for most people.
00:59:04.000 And the left is determined to get a bad guy, so they rephrase what they just saw.
00:59:09.000 But that was deeply profound.
00:59:12.000 They are mad at the world.
00:59:16.000 That's why they say no borders, no wall, no USA at all.
00:59:18.000 It's not about a solution.
00:59:19.000 It's not about helping people.
00:59:21.000 It's about destruction and death.
00:59:25.000 Okay?
00:59:27.000 You want death?
00:59:27.000 We got death.
00:59:29.000 Have you got Crip Daddy on the line?
00:59:30.000 I want to ask him about this.
00:59:32.000 Oh, I can get us some Crip Daddy.
00:59:35.000 He's beyond angry, this poor guy.
00:59:41.000 It's going to take a second to get him on there.
00:59:45.000 That's okay, because, frankly.
00:59:48.000 We should probably have these mics ready.
00:59:50.000 But yeah, we over-intellectualize the Antifa motive.
00:59:55.000 And I've seen these people, you see the way they scream.
00:59:58.000 It's daddy issues is a big part of it.
01:00:01.000 So you go, okay, well, then that's a solution.
01:00:03.000 I'm against divorce, or I think dad should be more present in children's lives.
01:00:07.000 No, that ship has sailed.
01:00:09.000 They don't want to fix that problem.
01:00:11.000 They want revenge for their father's lack of love, lack of interest.
01:00:18.000 And maybe daddy didn't care about you because you suck.
01:00:20.000 Where's your dad, Crip, Daddy?
01:00:23.000 Fucking, I don't know.
01:00:24.000 Where were Mexicans hang out?
01:00:28.000 Mexico?
01:00:29.000 Mexico, fucking Home Depot, same thing.
01:00:33.000 What's your life story?
01:00:34.000 Were you the product of a one-night stand?
01:00:37.000 I was born a poor blank child.
01:00:41.000 No, I mean, my mom was a little hoodlin, and my dad was a Mexican gangbanger, and it's the love story of the century.
01:00:51.000 Wow.
01:00:51.000 And how long did he stick around?
01:00:54.000 Oh, not at all.
01:00:55.000 Zero.
01:00:56.000 Yeah, no, no, no, no.
01:00:59.000 So not unlike Ryan's dad.
01:01:01.000 Oh, do we have the same backstory?
01:01:03.000 Yeah.
01:01:03.000 Same guy.
01:01:04.000 We're brothers.
01:01:05.000 Well, but Ryan is the low testosterone version, so his dad was a hairdresser.
01:01:10.000 Medium.
01:01:11.000 Ooh, gay.
01:01:13.000 No.
01:01:14.000 It's like Zohan.
01:01:18.000 Is that why your hair is like that?
01:01:20.000 Yes, that is exactly why your hair is.
01:01:21.000 His beautiful hair is like that.
01:01:24.000 We were just talking about Antifa and what motivates them.
01:01:28.000 And Jordan Peterson said in his own inimitable way that they just want to destroy.
01:01:34.000 There's no thought process behind it.
01:01:36.000 It's just gremlins from the movie Gremlins.
01:01:39.000 Yeah.
01:01:39.000 No, that feels about right.
01:01:41.000 I mean, I remember going through my, you know, little anarchist phase as a teenager, you know?
01:01:48.000 Yeah.
01:01:48.000 And some anarchists like the band Crass, they wanted to rebuild a society, blah, blah, blah, have more like independent sort of communities.
01:01:59.000 But then you had the exploited that just wanted to destroy everything, anarchy and chaos.
01:02:04.000 And that's all these people want.
01:02:05.000 That's all there is to it.
01:02:07.000 Yeah, it feels like a bunch of insecure kids that didn't have a lot of guidance coming together thinking that they're a part of a bigger thing than themselves and they just get lost in it, you know?
01:02:22.000 Yeah.
01:02:22.000 I think they were picked on and so their thing is, I'm going to stand up.
01:02:26.000 It's sort of like these guys who, and this is a noble pursuit, who were molested as kids and then they become these like pedophile hunters when they get older because they're like, I'm going to stand up.
01:02:36.000 So I think these dummies think that's who they are, but they're really just nerds who are picked on.
01:02:40.000 And then they're trying to find new nerds, like trans kids, to defend.
01:02:46.000 But it's not very anarchist because they end up going for like pro-COVID mandate shit that doesn't really fit their agenda.
01:02:54.000 They just want to fight, but in a mob so you can't lose.
01:02:58.000 Yeah, no, the whole hardcore scene is completely changed nowadays.
01:03:03.000 It's so different and weird because it's not hardcore at all.
01:03:07.000 It is the softest, safest shit.
01:03:10.000 They're giving out like safe hair and needles now at shows.
01:03:13.000 Like, come on now.
01:03:14.000 Fuck it.
01:03:14.000 That's not punk.
01:03:16.000 Hey, I want it.
01:03:16.000 Speaking of shows, I want to have a big show soon, like a censored.tv presents with people buying tickets and stuff.
01:03:23.000 I'm thinking of Florida in the spring sometime.
01:03:27.000 Are you allowed on airplanes?
01:03:29.000 Right?
01:03:29.000 No.
01:03:30.000 No, they don't.
01:03:31.000 I'm on a flight list.
01:03:33.000 Really?
01:03:34.000 No.
01:03:35.000 Oh, Ryan falls for it, of course.
01:03:38.000 So you could come down maybe and do a set, right?
01:03:40.000 Do you leave Chicago?
01:03:44.000 Given enough time, I totally could.
01:03:46.000 Okay, well, let's talk about this off the air.
01:03:48.000 But I want someone to put you in a little bag and throw you on a plane.
01:03:53.000 Just carry me around or one of those fucking baby things where they strap them to their chest.
01:03:58.000 Yeah, we'll ship you.
01:03:59.000 A papusa.
01:04:00.000 Yeah.
01:04:00.000 Yeah.
01:04:01.000 Can you come?
01:04:02.000 Carry me around.
01:04:03.000 You will one.
01:04:04.000 I've seen you with a picture of your baby.
01:04:05.000 Yes, I have.
01:04:06.000 Can you come to Limp Biscuit with me?
01:04:10.000 I would fucking love going to Limp Biscuit.
01:04:12.000 Anything, if I have to go to some weird handicap row or whatever, I'll change my ticket and I'll make sure.
01:04:19.000 I promise you, every time I go to a concert, I meet the band.
01:04:22.000 So we'll party with bread.
01:04:23.000 If you want to come, let me know.
01:04:25.000 But text me.
01:04:27.000 Ryan, he's not going to get on a plane and come to New York to see Limp Biscuit.
01:04:31.000 He's got a bus.
01:04:32.000 Did you get the bus yet?
01:04:33.000 Yeah.
01:04:34.000 He's got a bus.
01:04:35.000 They've raised money to get him a bus.
01:04:36.000 How long do you think it takes to go to Chicago to New York?
01:04:39.000 Six hours, but I don't know.
01:04:41.000 Six hours, really?
01:04:42.000 Is it farther?
01:04:44.000 It's about 16 to 20 hours.
01:04:46.000 Oh, man.
01:04:48.000 It's a bit of a drive.
01:04:51.000 Okay, we'll figure it out.
01:04:52.000 Yeah.
01:04:52.000 Hey, do you want to sit in a fucking steel box for 20 hours to spend one hour with him?
01:04:56.000 He's been in a steel box for his entire life.
01:04:58.000 No, he's sitting on a steel Box correction.
01:05:02.000 All right, Crip, thanks for coming on the show.
01:05:03.000 We'll see you next Monday.
01:05:04.000 Later, brother, absolutely.
01:05:06.000 Later days.
01:05:07.000 All right, let's get to the Mail B. And I didn't forget my computer this time.
01:05:12.000 The bell scout, Ryan, shut up.
01:05:16.000 You don't have a dad.
01:05:19.000 Let's turn our eyes to Gavin's mailbag.
01:05:25.000 Let me touch it.
01:05:29.000 Okay.
01:05:30.000 I think people are figuring out my schedule and they're sending me shit right when I do the mailbag.
01:05:38.000 But anyway, remember that guy in Calgary who told us all about the mantis shrimp?
01:05:44.000 Yes.
01:05:44.000 I looked up flights from Calgary.
01:05:46.000 They're like $400.
01:05:47.000 So he said, why don't you just come down here and do it?
01:05:49.000 Ryan is clearly incapable and I'm too busy.
01:05:54.000 So can you do it?
01:05:57.000 So we'll see what happens with that.
01:05:59.000 I was also thinking about the sucking off the piece of shit.
01:06:01.000 I'm not doing it anymore.
01:06:02.000 Whoa.
01:06:04.000 I got a letter from someone.
01:06:05.000 It's actually in the mailbag today.
01:06:10.000 And here it is, from Bruce.
01:06:12.000 You don't need to eat a $100 bill.
01:06:14.000 Trump did not lose.
01:06:15.000 That retard in the White House was cheated in.
01:06:18.000 You're right.
01:06:18.000 81 million votes, my ass.
01:06:20.000 You're off the hook.
01:06:22.000 You're absolutely right.
01:06:23.000 Yeah, then you're conceding a bullshit election.
01:06:25.000 Yeah, yeah.
01:06:26.000 I would be justifying the election if I ate.
01:06:29.000 So I will still suck off a piece of shit.
01:06:32.000 Sorry, maybe I misled you.
01:06:33.000 I'm not going to eat a $100 bill.
01:06:36.000 Oh.
01:06:36.000 Because I don't think Trump lost, but I still have to suck off a piece of shit.
01:06:39.000 I can't even remember what that was for.
01:06:41.000 I was going to ask you what that was for.
01:06:43.000 I have no idea.
01:06:44.000 Okay.
01:06:45.000 This guy thinks he's got the sprinkles.
01:06:48.000 I showed you sprinkles at the beginning of the show before we were racist.
01:06:53.000 And let's see if you understand what sprinkles means.
01:07:05.000 Hey.
01:07:05.000 Yeah.
01:07:09.000 Morning.
01:07:10.000 Good morning.
01:07:11.000 How'd you sleep?
01:07:12.000 Good.
01:07:13.000 Yeah.
01:07:14.000 Yeah.
01:07:14.000 Me too.
01:07:18.000 Can I just say something really quick, dude?
01:07:20.000 Yeah.
01:07:21.000 Yeah, sure.
01:07:22.000 I just want to say, like, thanks so much for last night.
01:07:25.000 Yeah.
01:07:25.000 I feel the same way.
01:07:27.000 And for real, dude?
01:07:29.000 Those hand jobs and blowjobs you gave me.
01:07:31.000 Out of this world, bro.
01:07:34.000 For real.
01:07:35.000 Thanks for saying that, man.
01:07:36.000 Yeah.
01:07:36.000 And you have so much cum, dude.
01:07:38.000 I'm full to the brim.
01:07:40.000 You were saving up your cum.
01:07:41.000 Dude, I've been saving up for like three days.
01:07:43.000 Like, ever since I got here, I've been jerked off once.
01:07:46.000 Also, like, your cum tasted so good.
01:07:50.000 Thanks, bro.
01:07:51.000 Pineapple?
01:07:52.000 Have you been eating pineapple?
01:07:53.000 Mango.
01:07:53.000 Mango?
01:07:54.000 I hadn't heard that one.
01:07:56.000 Yeah.
01:07:56.000 Try that.
01:07:57.000 It's underrated.
01:07:58.000 Yeah.
01:07:58.000 Pineapple, it's too much in the zyg, guys.
01:08:01.000 We're just choking around with my friends every single day.
01:08:04.000 Yeah, because we know what's up.
01:08:05.000 Yeah, I mean, it's on for another minute and a half.
01:08:09.000 We get it.
01:08:10.000 Oh.
01:08:10.000 Hey, man.
01:08:11.000 What's going on?
01:08:12.000 Like, I could hear you guys the whole time.
01:08:13.000 You could hear us sucking and fucking each other.
01:08:16.000 I was facing that way, so my ass was out.
01:08:19.000 Oh, so what you're saying, you were in prime position to be fucked and sucked, too.
01:08:23.000 Exactly.
01:08:24.000 I'm sorry.
01:08:24.000 It's not suckable.
01:08:25.000 It's very amusing, whatever.
01:08:27.000 Just normal funniness.
01:08:28.000 You know what's weird?
01:08:29.000 Not sprinkles, guys.
01:08:31.000 Having a sleepover and you're laying on the floor on a cot or whatever, and then saying goodnight, like when the lights are on.
01:08:40.000 What is this?
01:08:40.000 In 1836?
01:08:41.000 And you sleep in the corner.
01:08:42.000 You have like polio?
01:08:44.000 Yeah, like some sort of cot.
01:08:47.000 And like, do you say goodnight?
01:08:49.000 Is that gay?
01:08:50.000 That's gay.
01:08:51.000 Okay.
01:08:52.000 So you just stop talking, just like, yeah, man, fucking, yeah, blah, blah, blah.
01:08:56.000 Yep.
01:08:57.000 Well, ideally, you are drinking.
01:09:00.000 I don't know how far back we're going here.
01:09:03.000 Like, those guys were old enough to drink, so you just pass out.
01:09:06.000 But if we're talking about adults, I mean, sorry, kids pre-drinking, then there's that thing where you're like, yeah, well, she probably doesn't even know what they said.
01:09:16.000 And then that's it.
01:09:17.000 You're like, and then there's that.
01:09:20.000 What were you going to say?
01:09:21.000 Tyler, are you awake?
01:09:22.000 Yeah.
01:09:22.000 Tyler, are you awake?
01:09:24.000 And now.
01:09:26.000 Yeah, that's a funny phase.
01:09:28.000 It's well done and super bad.
01:09:30.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:09:31.000 But you know what's a fun game at Sleepovers when you're a kid?
01:09:34.000 You wake up and you have a tug of war.
01:09:36.000 Like, wake up, go, wake up, and you grab the blanket and pull on it.
01:09:40.000 Oh, okay.
01:09:40.000 And you're both so weak that it's like two ants pulling on, like, it's pathetic.
01:09:47.000 Yeah.
01:09:48.000 Yeah.
01:09:48.000 And it only lasts for like 30 seconds.
01:09:50.000 You got to be fast.
01:09:51.000 The second you wake up, grab the sheets.
01:09:52.000 I guess you could do this with your wife.
01:09:54.000 Grab the sheets and have a tug of war.
01:09:55.000 And it's like, you get to see what it's like to be a girl.
01:09:58.000 Doing it with the wife, that's fun.
01:09:59.000 Because I was just going to say that sounds fun, but I can't go back in time and be a kid during a sleepover.
01:10:03.000 Like getting drunk in school.
01:10:05.000 Either you did it or you didn't.
01:10:07.000 It's too late.
01:10:08.000 You can't fucking try it.
01:10:10.000 You missed your shot.
01:10:12.000 Okay.
01:10:13.000 Please remind Ryan that it's David versus Goliath, not versus.
01:10:20.000 Versus is the plural of verse.
01:10:22.000 I don't think that's a big hill to die on.
01:10:24.000 I'm not a big accent guy, maybe because I'm Canadian.
01:10:27.000 But I'm more concerned with like actual grammatical mistakes.
01:10:31.000 Superman versus Batman.
01:10:33.000 What's this?
01:10:34.000 Trump bald eagle.
01:10:36.000 Here you go, Gavin.
01:10:39.000 Okay, someone sent us a bald eagle thing.
01:10:45.000 You know, in California, they were killing the bald eagle.
01:10:48.000 If you shoot a bald eagle, they want to put you in jail for 10 years.
01:10:52.000 A windmill will kill many bald eagles.
01:10:54.000 It's true.
01:10:55.000 And you know what?
01:10:56.000 After a certain number, they make you turn the windmill off.
01:11:00.000 That's true, by the way.
01:11:01.000 They make you turn it off after you.
01:11:03.000 And yet, if you killed one, they put you in jail.
01:11:06.000 That's okay.
01:11:07.000 But why is it okay for these windmills to destroy the bird population?
01:11:11.000 And that's what they're doing.
01:11:12.000 I'll tell you another thing.
01:11:15.000 Cool.
01:11:16.000 Someone wants us to bring Crip Daddy to New York and feed him.
01:11:19.000 That's weird.
01:11:21.000 Check out this song I saw in Cringetopia today, I'm a Black Nigger.
01:11:25.000 Oh, I should have said I'm a Black Nigger.
01:11:27.000 Oops.
01:11:28.000 Sung by an Indian.
01:11:30.000 Have a great show.
01:11:34.000 Yeah, we're watching Feng Wang or whatever, like the Marvel Asian superhero movie, and there was a rap part.
01:11:40.000 And I'm like, in a Chinese rap, can they not say Naga?
01:11:45.000 Because that would be weird.
01:11:46.000 It doesn't even sound like Naga, it's Niga.
01:11:49.000 Sorry, we're discussing the word there in Mandarin.
01:12:07.000 Shoot, I should have used that as an intro song.
01:12:09.000 He gets a pass.
01:12:11.000 Maybe ancient Chinese secret, but have you ever seen anything by PD USA on TikTok or YouTube?
01:12:16.000 Funny shit.
01:12:17.000 Usually when people say ancient Chinese secret, it is the most ancient Chinese secret imaginable.
01:12:24.000 Trans on TikTok realizes being a man is hard, but the link is broken.
01:12:30.000 Ivanka Trump versus Hunter Biden.
01:12:32.000 It isn't about scale.
01:12:34.000 Is that PD USA?
01:12:38.000 I think so.
01:12:40.000 What the fuck?
01:12:42.000 What's up, man?
01:12:43.000 I'm looking in the mirror, but it's not me.
01:12:45.000 Who is it then?
01:12:45.000 I think it's me in the future.
01:12:47.000 What?
01:12:47.000 No, man.
01:12:48.000 I think that's Bobby Weird.
01:12:49.000 Holy shit, man.
01:12:50.000 You're right.
01:12:50.000 It's Bobby Weir in the mirror.
01:12:54.000 How the heck did Bobby Weir get in the mirror?
01:12:56.000 I think he's here.
01:12:57.000 Oh, whoa.
01:12:58.000 Oh, holy shit.
01:13:00.000 You're here, Bobby Weird?
01:13:01.000 Yes, I'm right here.
01:13:02.000 Damn.
01:13:03.000 What are you doing here, Bobby Weir?
01:13:04.000 You know what?
01:13:04.000 I'm just hanging out.
01:13:06.000 I have no idea what I'm doing here.
01:13:08.000 Epic.
01:13:08.000 That is epic.
01:13:09.000 Listen, man, can I get you a glass of water or something?
01:13:11.000 Yep, that'd be great.
01:13:13.000 Cool.
01:13:13.000 I'll be right back.
01:13:18.000 So what kind of stuff have you been up to lately?
01:13:20.000 Uh, nothing much.
01:13:24.000 Everything okay in there, man?
01:13:25.000 Yeah, I just shattered a glass.
01:13:27.000 He's always doing stuff like that.
01:13:29.000 Cool, man.
01:13:30.000 That's a cool trick, man.
01:13:31.000 Well, thanks.
01:13:32.000 I like yours, too.
01:13:34.000 Well, cool.
01:13:34.000 Thanks.
01:13:35.000 It's Tigers.
01:13:36.000 Cool, man.
01:13:37.000 Who's Bobby Weir?
01:13:39.000 He's in fucking...
01:13:42.000 Oh, the dead.
01:13:43.000 Grateful dead.
01:13:45.000 Okay, that was pretty sprinkly.
01:13:47.000 I think that guy, I would, I think he's got it.
01:13:50.000 But listen to this.
01:13:51.000 So remember earlier I said, yeah, Ivanka may have used her name to get more copyright on a purse faster.
01:13:59.000 Hunter Biden was way more corrupt about scale.
01:14:01.000 And this writer goes, no, no, no.
01:14:02.000 Stop saying that.
01:14:04.000 It's totally different.
01:14:05.000 And he goes, Ivanka Trump uses her family name to run a legitimate business versus Hunter Biden is a vehicle for the U.S. political establishment to steal money from the U.S. taxpayer.
01:14:18.000 Ukraine gets billions of dollars in sweet loans and other aid from the United States.
01:14:23.000 Ukraine then gives made-up jobs in state-run companies to children, friends, and acquaintances of U.S. politicians, thus sending untold millions of aid back to U.S. politicians' pockets.
01:14:36.000 That's what this is about.
01:14:37.000 Good one, sir.
01:14:39.000 Amazing.
01:14:41.000 That was amazing.
01:14:43.000 It was transgender kid.
01:14:46.000 Hey, Gab, so my 12-year-old has self-esteem issues.
01:14:49.000 Meaning she told me she thinks she's transgender.
01:14:52.000 12.
01:14:52.000 12 is fucking young.
01:14:56.000 Two years ago, she came out to me as bisexual.
01:14:59.000 10.
01:15:00.000 Bisexual is a type of sex.
01:15:03.000 It means you want to fuck men and women at the age of 10.
01:15:08.000 I'm not just sexually attracted to women, meaning I want to suck their tits and spank them and make out with them.
01:15:14.000 I also am attracted to men, meaning I want to jerk them off and finger their buttholes or whatever women do to men.
01:15:22.000 That's fucked up right then and there.
01:15:25.000 And this isn't the first time I've heard this.
01:15:27.000 I have a friend whose son is 13, and I think he just told me that when his son was 10, he said he was bisexual.
01:15:35.000 I think it's the norm now.
01:15:37.000 I was okay with this, but just assumed it was a phase.
01:15:39.000 Now she's wanting me to use he, they pronouns, and I refuse.
01:15:43.000 She's only 12, and I believe most of this is from social media and school, as we learned from libs of TikTok.
01:15:50.000 Any advice?
01:15:50.000 I don't want to hurt her feelings, but I will not call my daughter he, they.
01:15:54.000 My wife feels the same way.
01:15:55.000 Well, far be it from me to get directly involved in you raising a child, but if that was my kid, I'd say no.
01:16:02.000 We're not using they, them.
01:16:05.000 It sounds like you might be gay, so we'll figure that out when you're 18.
01:16:10.000 You can't get a tattoo till you're 18.
01:16:12.000 You can't be sexual till you're 18.
01:16:17.000 Okay.
01:16:17.000 Tell that to Desmond, who's turned into Milo for some reason.
01:16:21.000 Oh my God, he looks exactly like Milo.
01:16:24.000 Same color of blue.
01:16:26.000 Milo's just going to be flattered and turn around and be like, actually, Desmond's pretty cool.
01:16:31.000 So Desmond is growing up to be just a homo.
01:16:34.000 Thank God he didn't take hormone blockers.
01:16:36.000 That's the beauty of these male trans is, we don't have any tits to chop off.
01:16:43.000 Oh, he released music.
01:16:46.000 We are all amazing.
01:16:47.000 Oh, great.
01:16:54.000 He sounds like he's on ketamine.
01:16:58.000 I am amazing.
01:17:00.000 You are amazing.
01:17:02.000 We are amazing.
01:17:04.000 We are all amazing.
01:17:05.000 Some are more amazing than others.
01:17:06.000 It's not amazing.
01:17:08.000 It's not amazing.
01:17:10.000 None of y'all are amazing.
01:17:13.000 Amazing.
01:17:19.000 I do not give up my feel of amazing.
01:17:21.000 But yeah, you got to have faith.
01:17:22.000 I mean, what they do, they hold your kids at gunpoint.
01:17:26.000 And by that, I mean they say your child will kill himself if he's not allowed to indulge in what we decide is his or her sexuality.
01:17:37.000 So follow our depraved path or your son dies.
01:17:42.000 If you could do everybody a favor and kind of track down where do you think that came from?
01:17:47.000 Like, is it from school, like fellow classmates meeting or the curriculum?
01:17:53.000 Or is it TV shows the kids are watching?
01:17:54.000 Where do they get this idea of buy at 10?
01:17:57.000 I think what the fuck is this?
01:17:58.000 Or reels or something?
01:18:00.000 TikToks?
01:18:01.000 Yep.
01:18:02.000 Yo, what up, G-Dog Rye and Maddie?
01:18:04.000 Check out this guy out.
01:18:05.000 He's hilarious.
01:18:06.000 He trolls city council meetings.
01:18:07.000 Oh, for fuck's sakes.
01:18:08.000 Are you showing us?
01:18:10.000 Thanks, heavy-duty research team.
01:18:14.000 Damn, dude.
01:18:15.000 You're late.
01:18:16.000 Yeah.
01:18:17.000 But this is great.
01:18:18.000 This is a new one.
01:18:19.000 Yes, he's a swimmer in this one.
01:18:21.000 Hello, how are you guys doing, Council?
01:18:22.000 But it is an ancient Chinese secret.
01:18:29.000 I know you say, well, this is from yesterday.
01:18:31.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:18:32.000 The video's from yesterday, but Alex Stein is so popular.
01:18:35.000 It was just on Tucker.
01:18:37.000 So thanks for your research.
01:18:39.000 And here's a good one.
01:18:40.000 Who's playing a Tucker?
01:18:41.000 Video games are a waste of time.
01:18:43.000 Hi, Gavin and low-tee.
01:18:45.000 I am tired of hearing folks call in every week trying to defend video games.
01:18:49.000 They're for children and a giant waste of time.
01:18:53.000 These men need to get real hobbies.
01:18:54.000 Go to the gym.
01:18:55.000 Learn BJJ.
01:18:57.000 When I first read that, I thought it was learn BJs.
01:19:00.000 Learn Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu, boxing or MMA.
01:19:02.000 Read a book.
01:19:03.000 Listen to a podcast.
01:19:04.000 Work a second job.
01:19:05.000 Learn a new language.
01:19:07.000 For fuck's sake, go do something.
01:19:09.000 Instead of taking the slow drip of dopamine, you get dominating 13-year-olds in Call of Duty.
01:19:15.000 I regret the time I spent on those things in high school.
01:19:17.000 Instead, I could have learned a real fucking skill.
01:19:20.000 I hope the younger viewers listen to your advice so they don't get caught in the same loophole so many of the last two generations have.
01:19:28.000 And maybe if you weren't playing video games, all those years you'd have known how to spell advice.
01:19:36.000 You could save this guy's life.
01:19:49.000 And I feel absolutely amazing.
01:19:52.000 Amazing.
01:19:53.000 What did I do?
01:19:54.000 Well, I'm a gamer, and I play around three hours of League of Legends.
01:19:59.000 So he's pro video games?
01:20:00.000 Yeah, no kidding.
01:20:02.000 Yeah, you're definitely not pro getting blown.
01:20:05.000 What do you play?
01:20:06.000 Clash of colors that you wear?
01:20:09.000 It's clash of clans.
01:20:12.000 What the f- That was dope.
01:20:16.000 Okay, here's the last one.
01:20:17.000 This one's kind of interesting.
01:20:19.000 Gavin, I received a suspicious phone call two weeks ago from a girl I knew in high school.
01:20:26.000 I didn't know her well, and she was curious to know what I was up to.
01:20:28.000 I suspected my ex-girlfriend to put her up to it, and sure enough, she called me later that evening.
01:20:32.000 We had several conversation and texts over the course of a few days.
01:20:35.000 We caught up with each other, had a few laughs, exchanged some grievances, and discussed how things went wrong.
01:20:40.000 I left the door open to future conversations, and she agreed.
01:20:44.000 We'd been together for several years, starting just after high school, and split because I was not ready to get married.
01:20:49.000 She got engaged shortly after, and she lives across the country in a house she bought with her assumed husband.
01:20:55.000 No kids.
01:20:56.000 My question to you is, should I pursue?
01:20:58.000 She seems unhappy with her current situation.
01:21:00.000 Without overtly speaking about her current relationship, he was not mentioned throughout.
01:21:04.000 I'm fairly confident I can pull this off.
01:21:06.000 But the question is, should I?
01:21:09.000 If you think I should pull the trigger, any strategic advice would be appreciated.
01:21:13.000 I have a decent plan, but need some encouragement one way or the other.
01:21:17.000 Thanks, Gavin.
01:21:17.000 I wish I found you sooner.
01:21:19.000 Now, this is tricky, obviously.
01:21:20.000 I'm talking about sabotaging a man's marriage.
01:21:23.000 He'd probably want to fucking kill me if he found out I was getting involved in this.
01:21:28.000 But I used to say in my single days, if you can get someone out of a relationship, they're not in a good relationship.
01:21:37.000 So, I don't know.
01:21:38.000 I guess I would try to figure out if this is ethical.
01:21:42.000 I mean, are they happily married?
01:21:43.000 Does he abuse her?
01:21:45.000 Does she not love him at all?
01:21:48.000 Was she stolen in Uzbekistan?
01:21:51.000 Yeah.
01:21:52.000 So, if it's a normal functioning marriage, I don't know if you could handle the guilt of sabotaging it by getting in there.
01:22:00.000 And also, you meet a woman through infidelity, you're probably going to lose her through infidelity.
01:22:04.000 That's something to consider.
01:22:05.000 And you have to keep her.
01:22:07.000 You can't pull her away from a thing and then not be there forever.
01:22:11.000 So if you dump her now, she's just got a big commitment.
01:22:13.000 You ruined her marriage.
01:22:15.000 But if her marriage sucks shit and you're madly in love with her, I don't know.
01:22:19.000 Doesn't sound very Christian to me, but go nuts.
01:22:21.000 All right.
01:22:21.000 Last one.
01:22:22.000 600-pound life, Dr. Rex, Fat Guy.
01:22:25.000 Cool.
01:22:26.000 And this is the infamous Dr. No?
01:22:29.000 Steve Asante.
01:22:31.000 Oh, what the frick?
01:22:32.000 What?
01:22:32.000 The page isn't available.
01:22:35.000 That's weird because I just watched it like an hour ago.
01:22:40.000 Guys, don't send me Facebook links.
01:22:42.000 I'm banned from Facebook.
01:22:43.000 Wait, are you banned from Facebook?
01:22:46.000 No, I'm not logged in, but I have a dumper.
01:22:53.000 Or a burner.
01:22:54.000 I have a burner, and I was able to open it on my computer with my burner.
01:22:57.000 I'm assuming I'd have to.
01:22:58.000 I just have to be logged in, right?
01:23:00.000 Yeah, you should probably know that by now.
01:23:04.000 Is there a way to find it?
01:23:06.000 Just log in.
01:23:08.000 I don't know my login.
01:23:10.000 That's some weird shit.
01:23:13.000 That's a handy burner, isn't it?
01:23:17.000 Anyway, it's Steve Asante, the most disgusting, fat, disgusting pig in the world who got married, by the way.
01:23:23.000 He's balding.
01:23:24.000 He reeks.
01:23:25.000 Like, when he came into Dr. No's office, people were dry heaving from the smell.
01:23:30.000 And he says, how are you doing with hygiene?
01:23:34.000 And he says, I had a bath the other day.
01:23:38.000 I'm not sure that's...
01:23:38.000 Look at him.
01:23:39.000 I would ask how y'all doing, but I have an idea.
01:23:43.000 All right, Stephen.
01:23:44.000 We obviously have a couple of issues that we have to address.
01:23:48.000 One is that you are 557 pounds today.
01:23:51.000 Yes, sir.
01:23:53.000 So that means after doing exceptionally well for the first two months, you started gaining again.
01:23:59.000 And the second issue is Justin claimed that you stole his painkillers.
01:24:04.000 And if you did that, I'm not interested in hearing your lies and your excuses.
01:24:10.000 I'm going to have some test run on you.
01:24:12.000 And if you find any painkillers in your system, we're going to have a serious problem.
01:24:17.000 I told you, if you did this one more time, that's it.
01:24:20.000 Didn't I?
01:24:21.000 Yeah.
01:24:22.000 And on top of that, we have a dysfunctional dynamic with your family that seems to make you in your better situation.
01:24:29.000 Look at his fucking lower half.
01:24:32.000 Well, him and his brother don't get along.
01:24:35.000 Yeah, let me explain to you is both a few.
01:24:38.000 It's probably not.
01:24:39.000 Anyway, that's not the right clip.
01:24:41.000 But he talks about how badly he smells.
01:24:43.000 And he says, people are in the hallway puking.
01:24:46.000 And then he says, have you ever heard of soap?
01:24:48.000 I looked up Steve Asante.
01:24:49.000 I can't believe he's still alive.
01:24:51.000 3-2.
01:24:54.000 He's still living.
01:24:56.000 Why is God letting him live?
01:24:57.000 You gotta see this guy's body.
01:25:02.000 Look at his fucking hair.
01:25:04.000 How is he married?
01:25:06.000 Why do I have single male friends who can't find Mrs. Wright?
01:25:10.000 And this guy is getting laid?
01:25:13.000 Scroll down.
01:25:13.000 You gotta see his body.
01:25:15.000 It's one for the books.
01:25:17.000 Look at that.
01:25:19.000 That's a human frog man.
01:25:21.000 Of course, it's the parents' fault for getting divorced.
01:25:24.000 And I could only find comfort in food.
01:25:27.000 Well, no, you found a lot of comfort.
01:25:28.000 A don't.
01:25:30.000 You found a comforter's worth of comfort.
01:25:36.000 So me and my younger brother, Justin, put up with a lot of abuse because of that.
01:25:42.000 It was arguments all the time and fighting.
01:25:45.000 He's feeling good on this page.
01:25:47.000 Justin was small.
01:25:48.000 Their mother did have a drinking problem and I just overlooked it.
01:25:55.000 But Justin was about five and Stephen was around 11.
01:25:59.000 Every time I hear about drinking problems, I feel like getting wasted.
01:26:02.000 My brother and I went to the speaking of fat cells.
01:26:05.000 Look at his fucking body.
01:26:06.000 I found the clip where he smells bad.
01:26:21.000 Ryan, you skipped over the one that says he stinks.
01:26:24.000 Well, he says it talks about his hygiene.
01:26:26.000 Go back.
01:26:28.000 Why would you not put the one where he says he stinks?
01:26:35.000 I can't fancy someone properly up.
01:26:40.000 Alright.
01:26:41.000 So what is going on with your personal hygiene?
01:26:45.000 You heard of something called soap and water.
01:26:49.000 Yes.
01:26:50.000 There are a couple of people back there puking from the smell that you have.
01:26:55.000 It's in my bathroom.
01:26:59.000 Yeah.
01:27:00.000 So why not take a shower?
01:27:06.000 Well, I do have a rash underneath here too, so that's smelly.
01:27:11.000 Yeah, but pills turn you gay.
01:27:14.000 Is he a zero or a one?
01:27:16.000 Yeah, you're right.
01:27:16.000 Pills do turn you gay.
01:27:17.000 I like you.
01:27:20.000 So that's smelly.
01:27:21.000 Ew, yeah.
01:27:24.000 The eyebrows, like, smell.
01:27:26.000 Smelling, smell, smell.
01:27:27.000 Go to 3-3.
01:27:28.000 This is not related to the...
01:27:30.000 Well, this is related to what we're saying.
01:27:31.000 This fat bitch, this factivist, fat activist just died.
01:27:38.000 Fat studies scholar Kat Pase suddenly died in her sleep last week for reasons that have not been made public.
01:27:43.000 The American Academic was an activist who spoke about countering fat stigma, queering fatness, and opposing healthcare bias against the obese.
01:27:51.000 Queering fatness.
01:27:52.000 Her heart paséed while she was sleeping.
01:27:54.000 Yeah.
01:27:55.000 Her heart pasé.
01:27:57.000 Look at her.
01:27:58.000 Can you pase the buffet, late?
01:28:03.000 Like, what do we always say about all this stuff?
01:28:06.000 We say, look, we don't care that you're fat.
01:28:09.000 It's not that we're saying you're not pretty, but you're not.
01:28:12.000 The real problem is you're dying.
01:28:14.000 This is all about you.
01:28:16.000 You're someone with a noose around your neck standing on a block of ice going, oh, I get it.
01:28:21.000 So nooses and ice are offensive to you.
01:28:24.000 What's the matter?
01:28:25.000 We're not good enough?
01:28:26.000 And you're like, lady, I don't give a fuck.
01:28:29.000 It's just rope and ice.
01:28:31.000 But I'm watching you die.
01:28:33.000 And you're going to die.
01:28:35.000 And then the problem is now they die and you can't say, I told you so.
01:28:39.000 Anyway, let's get to the final video.
01:28:57.000 Glaswegians are a special brand of human being.
01:29:00.000 The Scots are particularly resilient.
01:29:03.000 They're made of rock.
01:29:05.000 And you can tell when you see someone whether they can knock you out or not.
01:29:12.000 And if you have an iron jaw and you've been in a lot of fights, then you can look at the guy and say, you can punch me as hard as you can, and I will not go down.
01:29:21.000 In fact, you may even say, I can guarantee you I won't go done.
01:29:28.000 Dun, of course, is the Scottish pronunciation of down.
01:29:31.000 And here we have someone perfectly predicting how it will go if they get punched in the face.
01:29:38.000 They will be fine.
01:29:40.000 Because they can...
01:29:41.000 The Scots, they're street fighters and they can size up situations like no one else.
01:29:49.000 Take it away.
01:29:54.000 Yeah, don't go down.
01:30:05.000 Ah, you ruined it, Ryan.
01:30:08.000 You ruined the show.
01:30:26.000 Wait, are you making notes to add the audio?
01:30:29.000 Yes.
01:30:30.000 So what happens when I go, you ruined it?
01:30:32.000 That's just a hard cut.
01:30:33.000 No.
01:30:34.000 No, leave it as is.
01:30:36.000 Leave it as is.
01:30:37.000 He did go down, though.
01:30:39.000 Get fired.
01:30:40.000 Get in trouble.
01:30:41.000 Be brave.
01:30:42.000 Don't ruin the show.
01:30:43.000 And never stop fighting.