Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - August 09, 2022


S4E152 - BANANA REPUBLIC


Episode Stats

Length

1 hour and 30 minutes

Words per Minute

132.10574

Word Count

11,993

Sentence Count

1,296

Misogynist Sentences

54

Hate Speech Sentences

74


Summary

On this week's episode of Get Off My Lawn, the boys discuss the latest in the Trump administration, the latest scandal involving the White House Correspondents Dinner, and the recent murder of a woman in South Carolina.


Transcript

00:00:13.000 Live from New York, it's Get Off My Lawn with Gavin McGuinness.
00:02:08.000 Nope.
00:02:10.000 It's the last button murder.
00:02:14.000 No, no, I'm the all the way to the right-hand side.
00:02:25.000 That's my imitation of President Joe Biden trying to put on its fucking jacket.
00:02:29.000 Can we just cut to that 2-4?
00:02:31.000 Yeah.
00:02:32.000 While it's still fresh in our minds.
00:02:35.000 Come on, Joe.
00:02:38.000 Here you go.
00:02:38.000 You got it.
00:02:40.000 And then if you just...
00:02:42.000 You gotta...
00:02:43.000 Oh, the wind's blowing it away from you, you see.
00:02:46.000 So maybe turn into the wind?
00:02:50.000 There you go.
00:02:51.000 It's just here.
00:02:52.000 Joe, can you show me how to put on a fucking blazer?
00:02:56.000 The guy's been wearing a blazer every day for 50 years.
00:03:00.000 And look, that's crazy.
00:03:02.000 Okay.
00:03:02.000 That looks like he's doing an impersonation of what you just did.
00:03:05.000 Yeah.
00:03:06.000 And then even then, he rolls up.
00:03:09.000 Like, you know when you put on underwear when your legs are still kind of wet?
00:03:12.000 And they roll up?
00:03:13.000 And then it's...
00:03:14.000 Oh, my glasses are gone.
00:03:16.000 It looks like they fell with like two times gravity, too.
00:03:19.000 Holy shit.
00:03:20.000 She's tired.
00:03:22.000 She's tired of the president.
00:03:25.000 Neither of them want that job anymore.
00:03:28.000 He does not want to be president anymore.
00:03:30.000 And Jill does not want to be the first lady.
00:03:33.000 Doesn't he bump into her kind of hard?
00:03:35.000 Dude, I could fix that.
00:03:37.000 Like right here.
00:03:38.000 What a fucking loser.
00:03:40.000 But if you talk to lefties, they'll go, yeah, I know he's bad, but it could be worse.
00:03:45.000 We could have Trump.
00:03:46.000 That's the worst nightmare.
00:03:47.000 So what are they doing to ensure that doesn't happen?
00:03:49.000 They are storming Mar-a-Lago, FBI, just like a good old Roger Stone.
00:03:58.000 And they are basically they're trying to implicate him with Jan 6, just like all this other bullshit.
00:04:06.000 And they're hoping that he has some illegal documents.
00:04:09.000 Which is weird because when he took documents, everyone takes a ton of shit home.
00:04:14.000 The Clintons basically emptied the White House when they left.
00:04:16.000 He took a bunch of documents.
00:04:17.000 He could have declassified them all with the snap of a finger, but you can't declassify things after you're president.
00:04:24.000 So they'll probably get him on a technicality like, hey, those were still classified after you were president and you had them, so you cheated.
00:04:31.000 I mean, show me the man, I'll show you the crime.
00:04:33.000 Isn't that what we said in Stalinist Russia, the Soviet Union?
00:04:38.000 So they're showing, they're grabbing a bunch of shit and they're just going to sift through it until they find a crime.
00:04:44.000 They could do it to you or I, easy.
00:04:46.000 Go to your house.
00:04:47.000 You'll find something wrong.
00:04:48.000 Remember Laura Loomer?
00:04:50.000 She was on some list where she wasn't allowed to have a gun and they never told her that.
00:04:55.000 Now, I can't remember why she felt inclined to look it up, but she did, got rid of the guns, and was safe.
00:05:02.000 But they could have stormed her place and thrown her in jail.
00:05:07.000 Thrown her?
00:05:08.000 Yeah, thrown her.
00:05:10.000 Sorry, a lot of drinking this weekend.
00:05:13.000 A lot of booze.
00:05:15.000 Not good.
00:05:17.000 I think I'm done, though.
00:05:18.000 That was my brother's bachelor party, and then we went to Greenville, South Carolina.
00:05:22.000 Had a friend drive me around.
00:05:23.000 My old boss from the Blaze, actually.
00:05:26.000 He still likes me.
00:05:28.000 He drove me around the whole area.
00:05:30.000 You know, like all cities, if you're close to the city, you don't have much of a lot.
00:05:36.000 And you move out, you get a bigger lot.
00:05:39.000 But you might get, if you go a little too far, you're too secluded.
00:05:44.000 And your kids don't play.
00:05:45.000 So I just said, here's my parameters.
00:05:46.000 My boys, my kids hop on their bike and go to their friend's house.
00:05:50.000 That's all that matters.
00:05:52.000 And that rules out a lot of shit.
00:05:54.000 Anything on a mountain?
00:05:55.000 No, thanks.
00:05:57.000 They got a big mountain there.
00:05:58.000 Paris Mountain, I think it's called.
00:06:01.000 But the takeaway from the south, I never really spent a lot of time there.
00:06:05.000 I mean, I guess I was in Abbeville.
00:06:08.000 Is that South Carolina?
00:06:09.000 For that pilot.
00:06:10.000 American $0 a day.
00:06:12.000 But unmitigated friendliness everywhere you go.
00:06:18.000 At one point, I think it was even last night, maybe, I'm walking down the street, North Maine, and I have on khakis, a white Haynes t-shirt and chucks.
00:06:32.000 That's all.
00:06:32.000 It could be a prison uniform.
00:06:33.000 I look like a cholo.
00:06:35.000 And some guy stops, like a 20-year-old, goes, hey man, I like your outfit.
00:06:41.000 Now, I left home in 1988, moved to Quebec.
00:06:44.000 So I'm an English person in a French province.
00:06:46.000 Animosity abounds.
00:06:49.000 Then I moved to the Lower East Side.
00:06:51.000 I'm a white, upper-middle-class guy living with Puerto Ricans and blacks.
00:06:55.000 Animosity abounds.
00:06:57.000 You're the gentrifier, you're the white male.
00:06:59.000 Then I go to the suburbs.
00:07:01.000 I'm a mega guy in a liberal suburb.
00:07:02.000 Animosity.
00:07:03.000 I've never not been in an acrimonious environment.
00:07:08.000 This is the opposite.
00:07:09.000 And I'm convinced it's God.
00:07:11.000 There's a church every block.
00:07:14.000 And people are just fulfilled.
00:07:16.000 You're no longer searching when you have God in your life.
00:07:19.000 You can relax and enjoy your surroundings.
00:07:21.000 Whereas atheists are always like, what?
00:07:24.000 Why am I here?
00:07:25.000 It's statistically impossible that I'm here.
00:07:27.000 What am I doing here?
00:07:33.000 At one point, we saw this cool house.
00:07:35.000 It was like an old, kind of a British-looking home that had been modernized.
00:07:42.000 There was like a glass, completely glass hallway.
00:07:45.000 You could see into his house.
00:07:47.000 And there was black steel.
00:07:49.000 So it was a really cool combination of modern architecture and classic architecture.
00:07:53.000 And I go, fuck, that house is perfect.
00:07:55.000 I wish that was for sale.
00:07:57.000 And the guy driving me around goes, tell him.
00:08:00.000 I go, what?
00:08:01.000 Tell him you think he has a beautiful house.
00:08:04.000 Because the guy was doing lawnwork.
00:08:05.000 And I'm like, this is not my background, but okay.
00:08:09.000 So I wind down the window and almost like a battered dog in a shelter, I go, hey, you have a beautiful house.
00:08:18.000 And he's like, thanks, buddy.
00:08:22.000 Nice.
00:08:23.000 Everyone I met there was incredibly cops.
00:08:26.000 Cop stops me.
00:08:27.000 Hey, how you doing, buddy?
00:08:29.000 But the one thing weird about it, too, was with the lack of anger and resentment, there's just sort of a lack of edge to it.
00:08:38.000 There's nothing edgy.
00:08:39.000 There's no punks in Greenville.
00:08:42.000 I don't think they've ever had a punk scene.
00:08:45.000 Now there's poverty there and there's crime, but that's in the Bible too.
00:08:50.000 If it's in the Bible, it's in Greenville.
00:08:52.000 There's no punk in the Bible, so there's no punks in Greenville.
00:08:56.000 I said to him, how's crime?
00:08:57.000 Because there's a really bad part of town, black part of town.
00:09:00.000 And the cop is like, man, business is booming.
00:09:04.000 He goes, that's true everywhere, though.
00:09:05.000 This kid shot a kid dead the other night.
00:09:08.000 And I go, oh, that sucks.
00:09:09.000 And he goes, yeah, I'd hate to be heartless, but they don't value their lives.
00:09:14.000 Why should I?
00:09:15.000 They just shoot each other every day.
00:09:22.000 But yeah.
00:09:23.000 Bump into some fans.
00:09:25.000 People recognize me.
00:09:26.000 Met some proud boys.
00:09:28.000 Those guys were great.
00:09:29.000 Got way too drunk.
00:09:30.000 I get this habit too with day drinking where you start at 3 and then you're doing shots and it's heaven.
00:09:36.000 And then around 8 p.m., you're like, dude, I don't know.
00:09:39.000 I got to have a nap.
00:09:41.000 Then you sleep from 9 to 1 and you awake.
00:09:45.000 It's like being a ghost.
00:09:47.000 You're not really alive.
00:09:50.000 It's not a good setup.
00:09:52.000 So before we get to this Trump thing, I want to tell you about an Uber driver I met.
00:09:57.000 This is why you should always talk to people.
00:10:00.000 His name is Jabuti Dumpidap.
00:10:05.000 No, what's his name?
00:10:08.000 I sent you the article, Ryan.
00:10:12.000 This guy's name is Sarah Bidget.
00:10:16.000 Sarah, like S-A-R-A, B-J-I-T.
00:10:19.000 Sarah Bidget.
00:10:21.000 Singh.
00:10:21.000 All Sikhs have the last name Singh for some weird reason.
00:10:25.000 And he owned a liquor store in a place called Downey in L.A. And so did his buddy.
00:10:36.000 And his buddy's name is go down a little bit.
00:10:42.000 Gerpreet.
00:10:43.000 See, it sucks to look these people up because they all have the same fucking name.
00:10:48.000 So there's about 100 Gerpreet sings when you Google it.
00:10:50.000 So include Downey.
00:10:52.000 Anyway, this story is not in the news anywhere.
00:10:55.000 It should be international news.
00:10:58.000 So these guys are patriots.
00:11:00.000 This guy Gerpreet was in the Navy and they love this country and they love Trump.
00:11:06.000 So my guy, my driver, not involved in this, well, not directly, he starts telling his customers when they come by, who are you voting for, buddy?
00:11:16.000 I think that you should vote Trump.
00:11:18.000 He's really a great guy.
00:11:19.000 He's totally digging it and he's real good for the country, my friend.
00:11:24.000 And that's the worst thing you can say in L.A. So not only do people tell him to fuck off, but they boycott the store bone dry.
00:11:34.000 Bone dry.
00:11:36.000 Not one single person.
00:11:37.000 Once word gets out in the community, not one single person goes there.
00:11:41.000 So he has to close up shop.
00:11:43.000 He says he lost 400 grand from his lease and inventory and all this other shit.
00:11:49.000 But it doesn't end there.
00:11:51.000 People start going, bankruptcy is not enough.
00:11:54.000 These guys need to die.
00:11:55.000 Because the word gets out, not just him, but the other Sikh who's like two blocks away and also has a liquor store.
00:12:01.000 Word gets out that the Sikhs in the community are pro-Trump, which means they're anti-Mexican racists, right?
00:12:07.000 That's the way dumb people think.
00:12:10.000 So they start going, let's fucking kill them.
00:12:15.000 And this black dude comes to my driver and he says, I'm going to fucking shoot you tonight.
00:12:21.000 And the driver, the guy with Sarah Bijit, just goes, no, thanks.
00:12:26.000 So that's when he locks up, closes the key, gives everything to the landlord, doesn't come back.
00:12:32.000 A day later, his friend is shot dead by this Mexican who ends up in a shootout with the police.
00:12:40.000 I don't know if I sent you that other article.
00:12:44.000 And he dies at 6 a.m.
00:12:47.000 They say shot himself in the head.
00:12:50.000 I think he was shooting at police.
00:12:52.000 He accidentally shot himself in the head.
00:12:53.000 I don't know.
00:12:54.000 Or maybe he thought, I'm not going to win this.
00:12:57.000 But this is anti-Trumpism.
00:13:01.000 This is like we've gone beyond national divorce.
00:13:04.000 Remember when I used to say that?
00:13:06.000 Ooh, we don't seem to like each other anymore.
00:13:08.000 No, they want us dead.
00:13:11.000 And they want Trump dead.
00:13:14.000 Why?
00:13:15.000 Because he's the first president in decades, definitely since Reagan, who cares about the people and is anti-establishment.
00:13:25.000 This was a Trump murder.
00:13:28.000 And no one knows that but me and my Uber driver from the airport.
00:13:36.000 Pretty heavy, huh?
00:13:38.000 That's why we didn't have a show yesterday, by the way.
00:13:40.000 My flight was canceled.
00:13:41.000 And while sitting there waiting, as this black woman stared at the screen like she was watching Saving Private Ryan on it, I just said, I'm just going to buy a ticket.
00:13:50.000 It's either wait four hours or spend 400 bucks on a new ticket and just leave the airport.
00:13:58.000 Like these people have no fucking clue what they're doing.
00:14:01.000 It's not worth your time to sit there and wait for them as they stare.
00:14:04.000 What are you looking at?
00:14:07.000 Fucking incompetence abounds.
00:14:09.000 Anyway, so let's get to this Trump thing because I think it's very interesting.
00:14:15.000 1-4.
00:14:17.000 Turns out the judge who has the biggest nose in America.
00:14:25.000 That's weird that a pop-up shows up of Raheem Kassan looking sexy.
00:14:29.000 Hello.
00:14:30.000 Hey, you want to subscribe?
00:14:33.000 I'll take my shirt off.
00:14:35.000 It's the new sexy right, like Will Witt with his sexy questions.
00:14:39.000 Hey, do you think they should make hate speech illegal?
00:14:45.000 This guy was previously a pedo lawyer.
00:14:50.000 Judge Bruce Reinhart, probably the guy who signed the warrant, used to defend pedophiles and was linked to Jeffrey Epstein.
00:15:03.000 And we're going to get into that later.
00:15:04.000 There's a lot of kid fuckery going on here.
00:15:09.000 Actually, you know what?
00:15:11.000 That just makes me want to jump to 3-2 because it's linked.
00:15:21.000 Yeah, there's a lot of sketchy shit going on with these establishment types.
00:15:26.000 They're not just corrupt doing insider trading, setting up things with Hunter Biden where he's getting kickbacks for the big guy.
00:15:33.000 That's the best it gets, is this intense corruption and the warping of our justice system and the Soros DAs getting people off for heinous crimes.
00:15:44.000 There's also some kid fucking going down.
00:15:47.000 One of the things you've been talking about is your application.
00:16:20.000 $45 million for being wrong.
00:16:24.000 And you know what?
00:16:26.000 For almost 100% being wrong.
00:16:30.000 But I'm still 1% open to any conspiracy theory.
00:16:34.000 Anyone.
00:16:36.000 Leave a little sliver.
00:16:38.000 And that's why people shouldn't be sued $45 million because they might be right.
00:16:43.000 Also, 1.5, we see that this is Merrick Garland.
00:16:46.000 I didn't know this.
00:16:47.000 You know, this retard DA who says that the number one threat to America is white supremacy.
00:16:53.000 I mean, it's just fucking laughable, right?
00:16:55.000 Nazi skinheads.
00:16:58.000 He was supposed to be...
00:17:00.000 Are you sure that's 1.5?
00:17:04.000 Or maybe it was 1.6.
00:17:06.000 That was 1.5?
00:17:07.000 We'll try 1.6.
00:17:09.000 He was supposed to be a Supreme Court judge.
00:17:13.000 Attorney General Merrick Garland approved an FBI rather than the former president who personally revoked his nomination for the Supreme Court when he won the presidency.
00:17:21.000 Now go back to 1.5.
00:17:25.000 This is what it's all about, folks.
00:17:28.000 U.S. Code 2071, concealment, removal, or mutilation generally.
00:17:34.000 And then if you are convicted of these crimes, mishandling documents, you shall forfeit the office and be disqualified from holding any office under the United States.
00:17:50.000 So they're pretending it's about documentation.
00:17:56.000 It's really about preventing him from being in office again.
00:18:01.000 And it's also, they're also praying to God that they'll find some Jan 6 planning, which is just so stupid.
00:18:09.000 What?
00:18:11.000 You think Donald Trump planned a riot?
00:18:14.000 This is the weird thing, too, about being dominated by these people.
00:18:17.000 They're fucking losers.
00:18:19.000 Like, China is a worthy adversary.
00:18:21.000 I'm scared of China.
00:18:22.000 But, like, that judge we just saw in the Alex Jones trial.
00:18:25.000 Have you seen her social media?
00:18:26.000 She's got rainbows all over her fucking face.
00:18:28.000 Like, she's a loser.
00:18:31.000 Merrick Garland saying, white supremacy is the number one threat.
00:18:34.000 That's gay.
00:18:36.000 You know what I mean?
00:18:38.000 Like, they're fucking nerds.
00:18:40.000 Look at Jerry Nadler.
00:18:41.000 That weird little fucking oompa loompa pork-bellied chomba pot.
00:18:50.000 He looks like he's a little teacup, short and stout.
00:18:53.000 Yeah.
00:18:54.000 He looks like a character from Beauty and the Beast, like one of those talking candelabras or something.
00:19:00.000 He says Antifa doesn't exist.
00:19:01.000 It's just an idea, which Joe Biden says too.
00:19:04.000 Our president, the front of this whole radical leftist movement, this subterfuge, cannot put a coat on.
00:19:17.000 Balances that are so fundamental to our democracy.
00:19:29.000 It probably reeks.
00:19:30.000 Want to join the distinguished chairman in acknowledging legislation of other members of Congress that are contained in the chairman's legislation that they're putting forth.
00:19:44.000 She's a babbling, drunken loser, criminal, constantly stealing from us and insider trading.
00:19:52.000 And like she's an integral part of this fucking system.
00:19:56.000 I have something on her.
00:19:58.000 Well, she says China is one of the freest societies in the world.
00:20:03.000 We still support the One China policy.
00:20:06.000 We go there to acknowledge the status quo is what our policy is.
00:20:11.000 There was nothing disruptive about that.
00:20:13.000 It was only about saying China is one of the freest societies in the world.
00:20:20.000 Don't take it from me.
00:20:21.000 That's from Freedom Comps.
00:20:23.000 Let's talk a little bit about that.
00:20:24.000 Okay, let's go to a Christian church then, shall we?
00:20:27.000 Shall we go to church?
00:20:30.000 Let's check in with the Wiggers.
00:20:31.000 I don't mean the white guys into rap, but the Muslims up there.
00:20:35.000 How are they feeling?
00:20:36.000 I'm sure Wiggers wouldn't fare too well over there either.
00:20:39.000 What the hell?
00:20:39.000 I used to like to have concentration camps for Wiggers.
00:20:44.000 Well, I had a bunch.
00:20:45.000 I thought I had a bunch of Nancy Pelosi stuff.
00:20:47.000 Did I lose it?
00:20:49.000 Do a search.
00:20:50.000 Searching.
00:20:51.000 Because there's the one where, you know, the famous one going around where they say, aren't you, is your, does your husband...
00:20:59.000 Yeah, there it is.
00:21:00.000 Is that in my notes?
00:21:00.000 Yep.
00:21:01.000 Where?
00:21:03.000 Oh, it's right above.
00:21:06.000 Yeah, play that.
00:21:17.000 You tell a little lie.
00:21:20.000 You make your baby cry.
00:21:24.000 You cheat a little bit.
00:21:27.000 Jim.
00:21:28.000 You quarrel over it.
00:21:32.000 Got a little wall of sound to it.
00:21:33.000 Yes.
00:21:43.000 Kind of perfect, too, right?
00:21:45.000 She's buying chips.
00:21:49.000 She...
00:21:50.000 Are they sending their best?
00:21:51.000 These are the people that have taken over the country.
00:21:53.000 It started with Obama.
00:21:55.000 We were cooking along.
00:21:56.000 I didn't mind Clinton.
00:21:57.000 He was fiscally conservative relatively.
00:22:01.000 And then Obama came along and he just infiltrated.
00:22:04.000 He merged the CIA and the FBI.
00:22:06.000 He added like 250,000 bureaucrats to the system, all under the guise of social justice.
00:22:13.000 So he infected our bureaucracy with even more bureaucracy and more socialist bureaucracy.
00:22:22.000 So now we have the media and the deep state and academia, all these kindergarten teachers, all out to destroy America, all telling us that things like heterosexuality is a system of oppression.
00:22:37.000 Look at this 3.7.
00:22:39.000 It's being taught.
00:22:41.000 It's being taught in school.
00:22:42.000 San Diego schools are now teaching that heterosexuality is a system of oppression.
00:22:49.000 Girls can have penises.
00:22:50.000 Encourages children to adopt synthetic sexual identities such as pansexual.
00:22:54.000 Pansexual means I fuck anything that moves.
00:22:58.000 Children should not be fucking anything at all.
00:23:03.000 So you should be asexual as a child.
00:23:06.000 Obviously.
00:23:07.000 I'm at the point now where every sentence I say, I just have to put obviously at the end.
00:23:13.000 Although the good news is some people are fighting back.
00:23:16.000 There's a library 3.6 that just got shut down for doing exactly that, pushing this sexual agenda.
00:23:24.000 Voters defund West Michigan Library campaign against LGBTQ materials.
00:23:30.000 But sorry, we're straying from Trump here.
00:23:35.000 So I was, Merrick Garland is getting revenge.
00:23:38.000 There's a lot going on here, too.
00:23:39.000 There's revenge.
00:23:41.000 There is prosecuting for Jan 6.
00:23:44.000 There is making sure he never runs again.
00:23:45.000 They're all combined.
00:23:48.000 But remember I said Merrick Garland, the fucking idiot who said white supremacy is the number one problem?
00:23:53.000 I thought this was a fun little look at the most wanted list.
00:23:57.000 These are white supremacists, I guess?
00:23:59.000 No?
00:24:00.000 They're black supremacists.
00:24:02.000 This was a big pattern in the early 70s.
00:24:07.000 Terrorism was everywhere.
00:24:08.000 Hijacking a plane was big.
00:24:09.000 Weather Underground was big.
00:24:11.000 And a lot of it was black militants who had this new take on Islam.
00:24:17.000 But then a lot of it was white Jewish women who were participating in all this shit to give the money to black militants.
00:24:25.000 Like the Weather Underground, when they murdered those cops, they were trying to get money not for themselves, but for some black militant separatist group.
00:24:36.000 What the fuck?
00:24:38.000 Yeah.
00:24:43.000 And by the way, 1-8, this was all over the news like yesterday afternoon that Trump had put ripped up notes and let them sort of rot in the toilet so they could be flushed down.
00:24:57.000 And I hear that and I go, yeah?
00:24:59.000 There was some old lady at my bar and she goes, and the problem is no one is watching this.
00:25:06.000 They're watching Fox News.
00:25:07.000 They're not learning about this.
00:25:09.000 And she's like 90 million, so I don't bother her.
00:25:11.000 She's got a walker and everything.
00:25:13.000 What am I going to do?
00:25:13.000 Get in an argument with her?
00:25:15.000 But I'm like, yeah, so?
00:25:17.000 You put notes down the toilet.
00:25:19.000 Good.
00:25:21.000 I don't want your notes available to people.
00:25:25.000 Like the way they see us now is as retarded villains.
00:25:33.000 That might be the name of this episode.
00:25:35.000 They see us as retarded villains.
00:25:38.000 Like, look at this 1-9 thing.
00:25:41.000 You know, the writers for these superhero shows are all leftist nerds.
00:25:49.000 It's not a very right-wing thing to want to write for a superhero show.
00:25:53.000 Fuck you and your lives!
00:25:57.000 Good.
00:25:58.000 Is this supposed to be a bad guy?
00:26:02.000 He is supposed to be the bad guy, but I have not even watched the show, but he's like the biggest meme going around right now.
00:26:07.000 Yes.
00:26:08.000 Homelander.
00:26:09.000 I've seen it.
00:26:10.000 What's with his face?
00:26:11.000 I don't know.
00:26:11.000 It looks like Jason Bateman mixed with insanity.
00:26:14.000 Yeah, it looks like a deep fake.
00:26:16.000 It looks plastic.
00:26:17.000 Are they doing that on purpose?
00:26:18.000 I don't know.
00:26:19.000 Or has the actors had a lot of surgery?
00:26:21.000 He has an insane face.
00:26:23.000 Do you want to meet someone?
00:26:24.000 Someone very special to me?
00:26:27.000 Yeah?
00:26:28.000 All right.
00:26:28.000 Come on down, everybody.
00:26:30.000 This little guy here is my son, Ryan.
00:26:37.000 The first time I've ever heard that sentence.
00:26:46.000 That's a drop.
00:26:47.000 Oh, my God.
00:26:48.000 You just made me dizzy.
00:26:50.000 Yeah.
00:26:56.000 Now, stop.
00:26:57.000 I have done, in my movie, How to Be a Man, there's a scene where my wife throws a bottle of Gatorade at my face.
00:27:04.000 I could not not go like this.
00:27:07.000 So they had to add my eyeballs in post, CGI, my eyes not flinching.
00:27:12.000 The fact that that kid managed to get hit and not flinch, because he knew it was coming.
00:27:17.000 That is good acting.
00:27:25.000 Good work.
00:27:48.000 Yeah!
00:27:50.000 Yeah!
00:27:54.000 They think we would all just laugh and clap if our enemies were beheaded.
00:28:04.000 Meanwhile, the opposite is true.
00:28:07.000 Like, they'd like to kill Ann Coulter.
00:28:15.000 And this is kind of off-topic, but you remember the whole, oh, this is related to how they see us.
00:28:22.000 So they think, remember that Sean Penn Kid Rock thing where they go, you still think you can see Alaska from your house?
00:28:30.000 Remember that?
00:28:31.000 Russia, yeah, yeah.
00:28:32.000 Yeah.
00:28:32.000 Yeah, Russia, sorry.
00:28:34.000 She never said that.
00:28:37.000 She said, you think that an Alaskan doesn't know about foreign policy?
00:28:40.000 She goes, there's parts of Alaska where you can see Russia.
00:28:45.000 That's what she said.
00:28:47.000 And it's true.
00:28:48.000 You can.
00:28:50.000 It was from SNL.
00:28:52.000 Did I just read that right?
00:28:53.000 Yeah.
00:28:54.000 That becomes true.
00:28:56.000 So the Tina Fey joke down there will click play on that thing.
00:29:02.000 What insight into Russian actions, particularly in the last couple of weeks, does the proximity of the state give you?
00:29:08.000 There are next-door neighbors, and you can actually see Russia from land here in Alaska.
00:29:17.000 This is who said, I can see Russia from my house.
00:29:20.000 Nonpartisan message from Governor Sarah Palin and Senator Hillary Clinton.
00:29:36.000 Good evening, my fellow Americans.
00:29:40.000 I was so excited when I was told Senator Clinton and I would be addressing you tonight.
00:29:48.000 And I was told I would be addressing you alone.
00:29:54.000 Now, I know it must be a little bit strange for all of you to see the two of us together.
00:30:00.000 I got the clip right here.
00:30:02.000 To see Russia from my house.
00:30:08.000 Speaking of seeing Russia from your house, like, that's what they accuse us of being.
00:30:12.000 And Sarah Palin was not our best contender by any means, but she's not stupid enough for them, so they have to make a fake one.
00:30:19.000 But everything they say about us, like you want us dead and you're stupid, everything they say about us is true of them.
00:30:26.000 Like check out Nancy Pelosi here saying she's always been attached to China because as a kid she would try to dig there.
00:30:34.000 What?
00:30:35.000 2-3.
00:30:40.000 Excuse you.
00:30:43.000 Dug a hole deep enough, we would reach China.
00:30:46.000 Little girl, I was told at the beach if I dug a hole deep enough, we would reach China.
00:30:52.000 So we've always felt a connection there.
00:30:55.000 That's when I was a little girl.
00:30:56.000 That might be one of the stupidest things a politician has ever said ever.
00:31:01.000 First of all, that's a joke when parents say that.
00:31:05.000 It's always like, you don't eat your dinner.
00:31:08.000 There's children starving in Africa.
00:31:10.000 Secondly, if you were to dig right through the earth and China's on the other side, that means China is the farthest possible place in the world.
00:31:19.000 It's on the exact other side of the globe.
00:31:24.000 So if anything, that should teach you that China's far away, my dear.
00:31:30.000 What an imbecile.
00:31:31.000 Anyway, let's do, let's catch up with my pet Biden.
00:31:35.000 Aye, aye.
00:31:36.000 Because we're basing the show on his retardation.
00:31:41.000 Very difficult.
00:31:45.000 Biden.
00:31:46.000 On him I can depend.
00:31:49.000 My cat.
00:31:50.000 Biden.
00:31:51.000 A monster of a president.
00:31:53.000 He's big and blue and sleepy.
00:31:55.000 But a friendly monster too.
00:31:58.000 My cat.
00:31:59.000 Biden.
00:31:59.000 Wait, what?
00:31:59.000 That doesn't rhyme.
00:32:04.000 So we've just got a bunch of montages of him being an absolute fool.
00:32:09.000 I think it's a message from the big guy upstairs, from God.
00:32:12.000 He goes, when you have deep state communism, you have raging incompetence.
00:32:18.000 And I'm going to put in checks and balances where when something starts falling apart, it's obvious to you.
00:32:25.000 You know, if brothers and sisters have sex, the kid is retarded.
00:32:28.000 That's a message from the big guy saying, don't do that.
00:32:32.000 If you let dictatorships, Banana Republic, I mean, you know what a banana republic is, right, Ryan?
00:32:38.000 No.
00:32:39.000 It's a term coined to refer to like those Central American, Caribbean countries like Honduras, where they just have one export run by whatever that Chiquita fruit thing is.
00:32:53.000 So you have bananas as your main export, and then the corporations that own the banana companies, they essentially run your country.
00:33:00.000 You can have politicians elected, but they're not in control.
00:33:03.000 The rich oligarchs are.
00:33:05.000 But the reason that we call this move with Mar-a-Lago a Banana Republic move is because also in these corrupt dictatorships, really, posing as democracies, you have things like ex-presidents, the FBI being used as a political tool to antagonize your enemies and make sure they don't run again.
00:33:24.000 So we're acting like a third world country, hence the name Banana Republic.
00:33:33.000 But I don't think any banana republic has ever had a bigger clown as their leader.
00:33:39.000 Like this guy has got to go.
00:33:42.000 Surely, I think the left agrees on that, at least.
00:33:45.000 Lord knows who they're going to come up with in 2024.
00:33:48.000 But look at this.
00:33:49.000 Weather may be beyond our control, but it's not beyond our control.
00:33:52.000 This happens at the very beginning, so you'll have to jump on it.
00:33:55.000 Beyond our control.
00:33:56.000 The weather may be out of our control for now, but it's not beyond our control.
00:34:01.000 And I promise you, we're staying, the federal government, along with the state and county and the city, we're staying until everybody.
00:34:09.000 Here he's just trying to speak English.
00:34:12.000 And it's not going very well.
00:34:14.000 It must be hard to read the teleprompter with sunglasses on.
00:34:17.000 You know, most families are focused on just putting three meals on the table, taking care of their kids and paying their bills.
00:34:24.000 Yep.
00:34:25.000 Helping you do that is my job.
00:34:28.000 That's a president's job as well.
00:34:29.000 When it comes to the benefits of this bill, you don't have to take my word for it.
00:34:33.000 Nearly 130 economists, seven Nobel laureates on the economists, in the economics, I should say.
00:34:42.000 What?
00:34:43.000 Former Secretaries of Treasury.
00:34:46.000 You know, I know most families are focused on just putting it in the future.
00:34:48.000 Former Secretaries of Treasury.
00:34:51.000 If I'm blackout drunk and about to faint, I talk, I'm more eloquent than him.
00:34:59.000 You have a video, Ryan.
00:35:00.000 Yeah.
00:35:01.000 So what they're doing now is they just, they pre-tape his speeches and then they jump cut them.
00:35:07.000 And you've never seen this before.
00:35:08.000 This is groundbreaking.
00:35:09.000 A presidential speech with jump cuts in it.
00:35:13.000 Never been done.
00:35:14.000 It does so much more.
00:35:15.000 It saves lives, including yours.
00:35:18.000 It'll help you do your job.
00:35:20.000 But it's just a start.
00:35:23.000 Last week I rolled out my Safe for America plan with the goal of doing three key things.
00:35:28.000 First, take additional common sense steps to do this.
00:35:31.000 I'm 100% positive this is real.
00:35:34.000 This is from the source is Kyle Martinson at GOP, RNC Research, Rapid Research.
00:35:42.000 The camera angle changes.
00:35:44.000 Yeah.
00:35:44.000 They get closer.
00:35:46.000 Maybe because they feel like they don't want to hide it.
00:35:48.000 They want to make it seem like it's on purpose.
00:35:50.000 Stylistic.
00:35:51.000 Right, right.
00:35:52.000 20 seconds of a pre-recorded speech Joe Biden gave yesterday.
00:35:54.000 Take a look at how much the White House edited.
00:35:56.000 I did not edit this in any way.
00:35:58.000 That's disturbing.
00:35:59.000 Did you see Trump, the video Trump put out?
00:36:01.000 We're a nation in decline?
00:36:03.000 Oh, yeah.
00:36:03.000 It's really good.
00:36:04.000 It's wildly good.
00:36:06.000 And he shows Joe Biden in it.
00:36:09.000 I mean, it's three and a half minutes.
00:36:10.000 We'll play a little bit of it, if you can dig it up.
00:36:13.000 He just put that on Truth Social recently.
00:36:18.000 If you go to New YorkPost.com.
00:36:20.000 Yeah, there it is.
00:36:25.000 We are a nation in decline.
00:36:29.000 We are a failing nation.
00:36:38.000 They stormed his home right after that.
00:36:42.000 That tie sucks, dude.
00:36:46.000 We are a nation that has a less inflation in over 40 years.
00:36:52.000 Where the stock market just finished the worst first half of a year in more than five decades.
00:37:00.000 We are a nation that has the highest energy cost in its history.
00:37:04.000 And we are no longer energy independent or energy dominant, which we were just two short years ago.
00:37:14.000 Isn't it nice to meet someone who can speak English?
00:37:35.000 We are a nation that allowed Russia to devastate a country, Ukraine, killing hundreds of thousands of people.
00:37:42.000 You know what I was just thinking about this morning?
00:37:44.000 I remember, I want to say, is it 10 years ago?
00:37:52.000 Time is weird when you're old.
00:37:54.000 It was like six or seven years ago, I guess we'll say, between five and ten.
00:37:59.000 There was Ukrainian protesters.
00:38:02.000 This is pre-COVID.
00:38:03.000 Kind of hipsters.
00:38:05.000 Young people, college students, who were protesting in Ukraine.
00:38:08.000 And Russia just killed them all.
00:38:12.000 And there was no media outcry.
00:38:15.000 No one gave a shit.
00:38:17.000 But now that you're supposed to care about Ukraine, now we care.
00:38:22.000 Now there's flags everywhere.
00:38:24.000 That was kind of an annoying thing, too, in the South.
00:38:26.000 I saw a lot of Ukraine flags.
00:38:29.000 Shut up.
00:38:30.000 You dupes.
00:38:32.000 But go forward in that a little bit.
00:38:34.000 It's really heavy when he shows Biden.
00:38:38.000 Yeah, there, go back.
00:38:39.000 That part.
00:38:44.000 Around we go.
00:38:50.000 Come on, buddy.
00:38:51.000 Come on, pal.
00:38:52.000 You can do it.
00:38:53.000 The little engine that could.
00:45:40.000 on anyway it's kind of spoken to me because where there's gays there tends to be some kid diddling I'm not saying all gays are diddlers, but a disproportionate number of them are, which brings us to the war on kids.
00:45:55.000 Don't worry, I won't forget about that Trump thing.
00:46:06.000 We are living in an ageism era where children are seen as human garbage.
00:46:11.000 Regulations to indoctrinate American school children with poisonous and divisive left-wing doctors.
00:46:23.000 So this is the big story that's pissing off everyone in the world.
00:46:26.000 3-3, you're not supposed to notice that these guys are gay.
00:46:30.000 Not only are a disproportionate number of gays involved with molestation, but a disproportionate number of lefties.
00:46:38.000 Georgia couple charged with using their adopted children to make child poor.
00:46:41.000 Now, if you follow the internet and you look at social media, the leftist position is, why would you notice that they're gay?
00:46:49.000 Why even mention that?
00:46:50.000 It's irrelevant.
00:46:52.000 Is it?
00:46:53.000 Because we talked about that earlier.
00:46:55.000 Remember that letter where they showed the data of these studies and they noticed that there were a disproportionate number of kids of two dads have mental issues.
00:47:08.000 They called each other, he's my partner in crime.
00:47:13.000 Premeditated.
00:47:15.000 I mean, talk about sinister.
00:47:17.000 Pedophiles should all be shot, but how about pedophiles who plan it out?
00:47:21.000 Oh, and then there's those guys, yep.
00:47:25.000 Look at the first article there.
00:47:27.000 Two dads are better than one.
00:47:28.000 Just bending over backwards, trying to accommodate everyone.
00:47:33.000 Those guys are still in prison, the Asian and the white guy, and each of them say the other guy made me do it.
00:47:40.000 Two-thirds of applications from single people to become a parent of a circuit child are done by men.
00:47:44.000 Two-thirds?
00:47:46.000 Jesus.
00:47:49.000 But yeah, three, four.
00:47:51.000 The left has always been rife with pedophiles.
00:47:56.000 A 1970s campaign to lower the age of consent has returned to haunt Harriet Harmon, Patricia Hewitt, and Jack Droney.
00:48:04.000 But in such a liberal climate, it wasn't hard for a small, determined group to exploit a commitment to free speech.
00:48:11.000 Always happens.
00:48:12.000 You start with anarchy, you're supporting it, yes, free speech, yep, gays should have the right to do this.
00:48:17.000 Yep, I agree, I agree.
00:48:18.000 And then the next thing you know, there's a pedophile saying, hi.
00:48:21.000 And you go, what are you doing here?
00:48:22.000 Oh, you invited me in.
00:48:24.000 I don't want you here.
00:48:26.000 Remember, the SPLC found that Christian group.
00:48:29.000 They listed them as a hate group because they said, oh, okay.
00:48:33.000 I'm not saying gays can adopt, but can we make triple sure that there's zero other options before we give the kid to the gay couple?
00:48:40.000 And that was seen as homophobic.
00:48:42.000 And the next thing you know, their banking's shut down.
00:48:45.000 Everything is over.
00:48:48.000 Like these guys, 3-8.
00:48:49.000 This is the last thing I'll say about this because we actually sort of cannibalized this section and we've already covered most of the stuff.
00:48:55.000 Like the, oh no, no, no.
00:48:56.000 Like the library I was talking about.
00:49:00.000 Like this.
00:49:02.000 3-5.
00:49:04.000 Sorry, we'll do that one last.
00:49:08.000 Flamer.
00:49:09.000 Dallas schools has the graphic book Flamer available in two of their middle schools.
00:49:14.000 The book contains sexually explicit and pornographic content.
00:49:16.000 It's available to 12-year-olds.
00:49:18.000 Click on the pictures.
00:49:20.000 So that's the book.
00:49:21.000 Really badly drawn.
00:49:23.000 So they have to jerk.
00:49:24.000 They're talking about jerking off in a thing a mountain dew.
00:49:26.000 And if you don't do it, then you have to drink it.
00:49:29.000 That's fun.
00:49:30.000 It's a fun game for kids.
00:49:32.000 He gets teased.
00:49:35.000 Suck any good dicks lately?
00:49:36.000 Ha ha ha.
00:49:38.000 Maybe they should be teased.
00:49:40.000 Like this.
00:49:42.000 12 is fucking young.
00:49:45.000 They're not sexual yet.
00:49:46.000 No puberty.
00:49:48.000 But they can read about intimate blowjobs.
00:49:54.000 And then, so we already talked about the voters shutting down the library, San Diego saying heterosexuality is a system of oppression.
00:50:00.000 And then this was good to see.
00:50:02.000 I mean, I'm a libertarian.
00:50:04.000 I want people to have freedom.
00:50:05.000 But just like the analogy I just said where the pedophiles show up and they're like, hi, and we say, who invited you?
00:50:11.000 It starts with diapers and it ends with molested kids.
00:50:16.000 Sorry, baby fetishists.
00:50:19.000 You're depraved.
00:50:22.000 WRTV's Meredith Hackler takes us to My Inner Baby to explain.
00:50:28.000 My Inner Baby sells adult diapers as well as clothing for adults that mimics that of children's clothing.
00:50:36.000 Recently, the city of Noblesville issued them a cease and desist, claiming that they're violating their zoning ordinance.
00:50:42.000 The city says this is a sex shop, while My Inner Baby says they provide medical devices to people who need them.
00:50:49.000 We have many customers that do use it for medical needs, and that's the biggest thing.
00:50:53.000 We don't distinguish.
00:50:54.000 We don't ask our customers, hey, what are you coming in here for?
00:50:57.000 It's how can we help?
00:50:58.000 The owners of the- That guy's got bad vibes.
00:51:00.000 So their pitch is, no, no, it's just for people who are incontinent.
00:51:04.000 Really?
00:51:05.000 Well, why isn't it called the incontinence shop?
00:51:09.000 Why have onesies?
00:51:11.000 And you know what they do, right?
00:51:12.000 They don't just sit around and suck on the bottle and poop themselves.
00:51:16.000 They fuck each other's mouths.
00:51:20.000 The woman, when she dresses up like that, she pees herself and then she blows the guy who's pretending to be her dad.
00:51:27.000 It's sexual and it's fucking sick.
00:51:31.000 Your babies say they are an FDA-licensed medical facility, but the city of Noblesville doesn't see it that way.
00:51:38.000 They sent this second cease and desist order after the Board of Zoning agreed the store was violating their zoning district.
00:51:45.000 The city's attorney has argued that since we're using the letters ABDL and others in our marketing, that we are thereby marketing everything as a sex shop.
00:51:54.000 The acronym ABDL stands for Adult Baby Diaper Lovers, which in some cases Can be considered a fetish.
00:52:02.000 However, one customer says the city has got it all wrong.
00:52:05.000 It is a medical supply store.
00:52:07.000 There is a lot of people like myself that have bladder issues.
00:52:11.000 Okay.
00:52:12.000 I do wear incontinence due to my bladder being paralyzed.
00:52:22.000 So I come here because this is actually a really good place to go, and it's better than what Walmart sells.
00:52:27.000 While Clinton uses the medical supplies sold at My Inner Baby, she also enjoys the clothes.
00:52:33.000 What a coincidence.
00:52:35.000 Isn't that a funny coincidence?
00:52:36.000 Yeah.
00:52:37.000 So she's incontinent.
00:52:38.000 She goes to Inner Baby, and then when she sees the onesies and the soothers and the little baby bibs, she goes, I like those too.
00:52:44.000 Look at Venn diagram.
00:52:46.000 You're a fat and lazy, depraved whore.
00:52:59.000 From what?
00:53:00.000 You know, I think these people may also be victims of child abuse too.
00:53:05.000 And they're trying to like relive their childhood without the sexual trauma or something fucked up.
00:53:11.000 It's depraved.
00:53:12.000 That's, we can all agree, right?
00:53:14.000 It is very therapeutic for me.
00:53:16.000 My inner baby may be out of the norm, but the owners maintain they aren't hurting anyone or breaking any rules.
00:53:23.000 So they plan on fighting the city in court.
00:53:26.000 This is not a sex shop, and we're not going to be bullied.
00:53:29.000 You don't get to tell us your morals don't fit.
00:53:31.000 Nobody puts adult baby in the corner.
00:53:35.000 We're going to stand and we're going to fight back.
00:53:38.000 Working for you in Noblesville.
00:53:39.000 Meredith Hackler, WRTV.
00:53:41.000 Thanks, Meredith.
00:53:41.000 Time to pacify those guys.
00:53:45.000 All right.
00:53:46.000 Oh, I'm sorry.
00:53:47.000 Wait.
00:53:47.000 We left out this Biden gaff.
00:53:50.000 Oh, yeah.
00:53:51.000 This is a fake.
00:53:51.000 Showbine shakes hands with Chuck Schumer and then immediately forgets he did it and tries again.
00:53:57.000 Hi, Chuck.
00:53:58.000 Thank you.
00:54:00.000 Hey, Chuck.
00:54:01.000 Shake my hand.
00:54:03.000 Great speaker, our partner who all of these people.
00:54:06.000 Oh, that's embarrassing.
00:54:07.000 He touches his mouth.
00:54:08.000 Blow that up because his mannerisms are so bizarre.
00:54:15.000 There you go, got it.
00:54:16.000 Shake your hand.
00:54:17.000 And he looks at everybody.
00:54:18.000 Shake my hand.
00:54:19.000 What the fuck?
00:54:20.000 Now our great speaker, our partner who all of these buildings are.
00:54:23.000 And then what's this?
00:54:25.000 Is he drooling?
00:54:27.000 Shake my hand.
00:54:28.000 Hey, shake my hand.
00:54:28.000 He's looking at his hand.
00:54:30.000 What the fuck?
00:54:31.000 Now our great speaker, our partner who's been in the house.
00:54:33.000 And then he wipes his chin and smiles like, it's just changing.
00:54:38.000 Hey, that didn't happen.
00:54:39.000 I didn't shake his hand.
00:54:40.000 That one was just a severe, man.
00:54:42.000 That is severe short-term memory loss.
00:54:46.000 My God.
00:54:47.000 Holy Lord.
00:54:48.000 All right, now let's do that Trump ending so we can leave on a happy note because we've got molested kids, a corrupt dictatorship.
00:54:55.000 We've got a weaponized FBI.
00:54:57.000 It's not a very cheery episode.
00:54:59.000 Correct.
00:55:02.000 There is no mountain we cannot climb.
00:55:05.000 There is no summit we cannot reach.
00:55:07.000 There is no challenge we cannot beat.
00:55:11.000 There is no victory we cannot have.
00:55:14.000 We will not bend.
00:55:16.000 We will not break.
00:55:18.000 We will not yield.
00:55:20.000 Ever, ever, ever.
00:55:22.000 We will never give in.
00:55:23.000 We will never give up.
00:55:24.000 We will never, ever, never let you down.
00:55:28.000 As long as we are confident, the tyrants we are fighting do not stand up a chance.
00:55:36.000 Because we are Americans and Americans kneel to God and God alone.
00:55:41.000 And it is time to start talking about greatness for our country again.
00:55:47.000 And we will let Joe Yodik out of prison, frankly.
00:55:53.000 Did you hear that part when he said that?
00:55:55.000 No, I didn't hear that part.
00:55:56.000 Yeah, it was in there.
00:55:58.000 So he mentioned the Tiger King in that speech?
00:56:01.000 It seems kind of superfluous.
00:56:02.000 They did mention the Tiger King, yeah.
00:56:04.000 He said, there's going to be great new episodes of Tiger King on Netflix, frankly.
00:56:10.000 But we're going to let him out in a big way.
00:56:12.000 What was his crime anyway?
00:56:13.000 Killing tigers?
00:56:14.000 I don't give a shit.
00:56:15.000 No, no, it wasn't even...
00:56:16.000 They just did that to assault my character.
00:56:18.000 But it was about...
00:56:20.000 Oh, yeah, you did plan to have someone murdered.
00:56:22.000 Well, you know.
00:56:23.000 That's frowned upon in the legal community.
00:56:26.000 Tigers kill all the time.
00:56:28.000 But yeah, that's what I saw in the South, Tiger King.
00:56:31.000 I saw America.
00:56:32.000 That's right.
00:56:33.000 I saw good people helping each other out.
00:56:36.000 I saw a total lack of conflict.
00:56:40.000 I saw hope for the future.
00:56:43.000 And we know we're going to destroy in the midterms.
00:56:48.000 Now, as far as 2024 goes, it's possible they'll try to steal the election again.
00:56:53.000 We're up against a very corrupt justice system.
00:56:56.000 They just had Trump invaded based on bullshit with a pedophile judge and a DA who just wants revenge and a deep state that is determined to make it illegal for him to run for president because that's the only way they can stop him now.
00:57:12.000 Make his existence illegal.
00:57:16.000 Yours, woke moralists.
00:57:18.000 We'll see who cancels who.
00:57:22.000 Are you mocking me?
00:57:24.000 No.
00:57:27.000 I was serious.
00:57:29.000 All right.
00:57:31.000 So yeah, I think it makes sense to be optimistic about the future.
00:57:36.000 But holy shit.
00:57:38.000 Things sure go bad before they get good.
00:57:40.000 You talk about the peaks and valleys.
00:57:42.000 This is a hell of a valley we're in right now, boys.
00:57:46.000 I'm seeing national divorce trend on Twitter, but it feels like the opposite because, I mean, you have Andrew Yang standing up for Trump, Cuomo saying this better be legit because this is terrifying if this is just for political gains.
00:58:00.000 You got people.
00:58:00.000 Yeah, Cuomo.
00:58:02.000 Cuomo is against it.
00:58:03.000 Rubio, I mean, it seems to be like the divorced couple is coming back because the kid got in trouble in school and now they're working together.
00:58:10.000 They'd be like, what the fuck is this?
00:58:13.000 What the fuck is heesh?
00:58:14.000 You know what I was thinking, Ryan?
00:58:16.000 The same way your dad walked out on you at a young age, you should consider walking out on your wife and kid.
00:58:21.000 I thought you were going to say walking out on him.
00:58:23.000 Move to L.A. Maybe.
00:58:25.000 Maybe Roosevelt Island for a little bit.
00:58:28.000 Yeah, do that.
00:58:29.000 I was thinking about Riding motorcycles.
00:58:31.000 I asked Maddie if it's too late to pick it up.
00:58:34.000 He said, nah, he can pick it up.
00:58:36.000 So maybe I will.
00:58:37.000 Okay, good.
00:58:38.000 I'm glad to hear it.
00:58:39.000 Because she's not that cute.
00:58:40.000 She's just the most cutest petutist.
00:58:44.000 Yeah.
00:58:45.000 So don't feel disheartened, folks.
00:58:48.000 I mean, we built this country.
00:58:50.000 We kicked out the British, the most powerful empire in history.
00:58:55.000 And we fought them from the trees with a couple of Indians and Frenchmen on our back pocket.
00:59:00.000 So we can survive this.
00:59:02.000 But it's just amazing that this incredibly powerful machine is run by these incompetent boobs.
00:59:10.000 Even like behind the scenes like Soros, the guy who giggles about working for the Nazis and then tries to cancel people who mention it, even though he put it in his own fucking book.
00:59:21.000 Klaus Schwab with his ridiculous Star Trek uniforms.
00:59:25.000 I mean, even the behind the scenes guys suck.
00:59:28.000 Barack Obama, who thinks there should be no guns at all in the world?
00:59:33.000 Michelle Obama, who writes a book about herself called Becoming Michelle.
00:59:38.000 I mean, it's pretty amazing the absolute buffoonery that permeates this national divorce.
00:59:45.000 And it's also amazing how the left have been so fucking brainwashed.
00:59:50.000 And they keep fucking up.
00:59:52.000 Like the January 6th committee was a complete failure.
00:59:56.000 If anything, it brought people to our side.
00:59:59.000 You see some blue-hair tattooist with a punk shirt on say that he heard someone deny the Holocaust and that's why he left the Oath Keepers.
01:00:06.000 What?
01:00:07.000 We've got some redneck who goes, I might be over the idea that the election was stolen.
01:00:15.000 Maybe.
01:00:16.000 And then you got Nick, our buddy Nick, the filmmaker, saying it was violent.
01:00:21.000 It was terrible.
01:00:23.000 Some female cop lying, saying that she was doing hand-to-hand combat for hours.
01:00:28.000 Remember that her friend too, that black dude, who said, let's get that fucking...
01:00:36.000 Yeah.
01:00:37.000 Zero footage of it.
01:00:39.000 I mean, these are imbeciles.
01:00:42.000 We're being dominated.
01:00:44.000 This Banana Republic is being dominated by fucking idiots.
01:00:47.000 At least Banana Republic, the guy who owns the banana company, knows shit.
01:00:53.000 Can speak the language.
01:00:55.000 Speaking of Klaus Schwab, did you know that his father, even in this article that tries to disprove his father was working with the Nazi Germans, Klaus Schwab's father, on the other hand, Eugene, the history of Eugene's relationship with Nazism in general is complex.
01:01:10.000 Oh, that's code.
01:01:11.000 That's a red flag.
01:01:12.000 That's substantive evidence to ties of high-ranking German league.
01:01:15.000 Oh, okay.
01:01:16.000 Particularly Hitler.
01:01:17.000 Wow, that is.
01:01:18.000 Yeah, they always say it's complicated.
01:01:21.000 It's complicated.
01:01:22.000 Like, some Proud Boys are black.
01:01:24.000 Yes.
01:01:25.000 White supremacy is complicated.
01:01:27.000 Oh, Gavin McInnes' wife is Native American?
01:01:30.000 Well, yeah, it's complicated.
01:01:32.000 And then they don't explain why.
01:01:34.000 They just say it's complicated.
01:01:36.000 It's not.
01:01:37.000 You're full of shit.
01:01:38.000 Anyway, let's get to the mailbag.
01:01:40.000 All right.
01:01:41.000 All right.
01:01:45.000 Ryan, shut up, you don't have a dead.
01:01:49.000 Let's turn the priest together.
01:01:55.000 Let me touch it.
01:01:57.000 You know, if you did abandon your family, I think I would have to fire you.
01:02:01.000 Of course.
01:02:02.000 But that's weird.
01:02:04.000 I couldn't work here and then abandon them.
01:02:06.000 I would be in New York still.
01:02:08.000 Yeah.
01:02:09.000 You just wouldn't.
01:02:10.000 You'd say, we don't get along.
01:02:12.000 Yeah, you'd be paying for it.
01:02:13.000 And then I'd be like, well, when did you last see your kid?
01:02:16.000 I got messed up last weekend.
01:02:18.000 I'm probably going to see her next weekend.
01:02:19.000 It was complex.
01:02:20.000 And it's fucked up.
01:02:21.000 Like an employer, it's none of my business what you do with your private life.
01:02:26.000 But I just wouldn't be able to look at you and I wouldn't be able to relax.
01:02:29.000 Yeah, no, that's true.
01:02:30.000 I'd feel this disdain.
01:02:31.000 That's what pissed me off when they said Anthony beats his girlfriends.
01:02:35.000 It's like, do you think I would hang out with someone who beat their wife or their girlfriends?
01:02:39.000 No.
01:02:45.000 I will not leave my family.
01:02:50.000 What?
01:02:50.000 I will not leave my family.
01:02:52.000 Daphne liked our bunny.
01:02:54.000 Oh, my God, yeah.
01:02:55.000 While I was away, we have a bunny named, it was Josiah, but my youngest doesn't like that name, so now it's Josie.
01:03:02.000 I have a cute, cute video, but I don't want to show the inside of your kid's room.
01:03:07.000 That's weird.
01:03:08.000 But she was so, so happy about the bunny.
01:03:11.000 Isn't it fucking weird how little kids love little animals, and particularly stuffed animals?
01:03:18.000 Oh, yeah.
01:03:19.000 Why do they like stuffed animals so much?
01:03:22.000 Like my nine-year-old, he has his stuffies.
01:03:24.000 They all get delegated days.
01:03:26.000 They all have names.
01:03:27.000 He doesn't think they're real.
01:03:29.000 He's like, nine is old.
01:03:32.000 So it's not like he thinks they have feelings or anything.
01:03:35.000 But he positions them by his bed so they can all see and stuff like that.
01:03:39.000 Here's my theory.
01:03:41.000 Theory number 364.
01:03:45.000 I think it's genetic.
01:03:46.000 I think it's cave-based.
01:03:49.000 And just like we like being around water, because historically, if you're near water, you're probably not going to die.
01:03:56.000 So that's why beachfront is popular.
01:03:58.000 And we like to have a creek running through our backyard because water, in the back of your mind, your pituitary gland goes, we're safe, this is good.
01:04:06.000 Similarly, little kids, if they're around small game, like bunnies and little bear cubs, not a good example, but little animals, that means that, well, first it means that the cave is thriving and you're doing well,
01:04:23.000 but it also means you're not going to starve.
01:04:25.000 Yeah.
01:04:25.000 Because there's small game for the mom to hit with a slingshot and eat.
01:04:30.000 So it means you're safe.
01:04:31.000 I guess it also means, you know, you have domesticated animals, maybe early dogs, and then there's puppies around, and that means that, you know, your tribe is multiplying and being fruitful.
01:04:43.000 That's a pretty good theory.
01:04:45.000 Theor?
01:04:46.000 Yeah.
01:04:47.000 If you don't want to say theory, it's short.
01:04:52.000 Um.
01:04:55.000 What's this here?
01:05:00.000 Okay.
01:05:02.000 Oh, people talking about the things we've already covered.
01:05:06.000 This was my lovey.
01:05:09.000 That was your stuffy when you were a kid?
01:05:11.000 My stuffy.
01:05:12.000 What is it?
01:05:12.000 I don't know what happened to it.
01:05:13.000 It's a boxer pillow fighter.
01:05:17.000 They had a whole bunch of different types, and mine was this boxer boy.
01:05:21.000 And are you supposed to use it for pillow fights?
01:05:24.000 Yeah, you would like...
01:05:25.000 You could.
01:05:26.000 I mean, I never really hit anybody with him, but I would just hang out with him.
01:05:31.000 Huh.
01:05:32.000 It's my friend.
01:05:35.000 My boy, my eldest boy, was obsessed with Woody from Toy Story, and he carried him everywhere.
01:05:41.000 And then he left him in a taxi in Glasgow.
01:05:44.000 Oh, shit.
01:05:45.000 And he said, what happened?
01:05:46.000 Where's Woody?
01:05:47.000 And we said, oh, he had to go get cleaned.
01:05:51.000 And we just bought him a new one, but they were really hard to find back then.
01:05:56.000 So we had to wait till we got back to the States.
01:05:58.000 We bought him one at a Toys R Us.
01:06:00.000 And then you pulled his back, and he was saying different shit.
01:06:03.000 Whoa.
01:06:04.000 He used to say like, howdy, partner?
01:06:06.000 And then this particular doll said different shit.
01:06:08.000 And he goes, why is he saying different stuff?
01:06:10.000 And we go, they cleaned his voice box.
01:06:15.000 There's a snake in my boot.
01:06:17.000 Yeah, yeah, he would say that.
01:06:19.000 How did you know that?
01:06:21.000 That movie ruled.
01:06:23.000 Yeah, but how do you know?
01:06:24.000 I remember all of those things.
01:06:26.000 He says, you're my favorite deputy.
01:06:28.000 He's like, somebody poisoned the water hole.
01:06:31.000 There's a snake in my boot.
01:06:33.000 How did you know that he says there's a snake in my boot?
01:06:35.000 Did you have that fucking toy, Ryan?
01:06:37.000 It's in the movie.
01:06:38.000 All of a sudden, they came from the movie.
01:06:41.000 And I remember the movie.
01:06:43.000 I also remember Goodfellas.
01:06:44.000 He's like, oh, what are you fucking, oh, whoa.
01:06:47.000 So, I remember adult movies just as well.
01:06:50.000 I'm scared you had a toy at the age of like 15.
01:06:53.000 No, I had a Woody Toy, but I was young.
01:06:55.000 I had it like it was a marionette puppet.
01:06:59.000 How old were you when Toy Story came out?
01:07:01.000 What year did it come out?
01:07:02.000 Let's see.
01:07:04.000 If it's post-puberty.
01:07:06.000 What year did Toy Story 1 come out?
01:07:10.000 Toy Story was released in 1996.
01:07:14.000 Okay, that's fine.
01:07:16.000 This one is just called Thoughts, and it is a severely handicapped and unattractive fat black woman whose legs are stubs and a seemingly healthy six-foot-tall white man who looks gainfully employed and probably has a lot going on.
01:07:43.000 Okay, and clicking.
01:07:46.000 So what do his friends think?
01:07:48.000 I mean, part of marriage, whether you like it or not, is impressing your friends.
01:07:53.000 And you want your friends to be like, holy shit, lucky bastard.
01:07:55.000 He really nailed one.
01:07:57.000 But how did she get him?
01:08:02.000 14 questions for couples.
01:08:05.000 Where is your leg?
01:08:06.000 Who is the better dancer?
01:08:09.000 Who is the better cook?
01:08:12.000 Who is more affectionate?
01:08:15.000 Who is more likely to get arrested?
01:08:18.000 Who is more?
01:08:19.000 Well, statistically.
01:08:21.000 So they got tons of kids, and she has trouble giving birth, obviously.
01:08:26.000 Oh, man.
01:08:26.000 So they're like, hey, we made it through the third trimester.
01:08:34.000 Just walks on her little stubs.
01:08:38.000 Isn't that weird?
01:08:39.000 It's got to be cool you could just give your mom a hug without any like hey man wait till you see my my new wife I'm gonna bring her over okay and then she shows up at the door all right hi hey do you guys want anything like divorce papers a step stool legs not a trampoline I wonder if she puts things on her stubs like little leather pads Neo why didn't you ring the doorbell?
01:09:10.000 Why'd you insist on knocking?
01:09:12.000 Okay, so my thoughts are you could do better, sir.
01:09:16.000 And ma'am, good job.
01:09:19.000 Yeah, ma'am, I'm impressed.
01:09:21.000 Like, there's a lot of lonely ladies out there, and you managed to get a, I mean, he's kind of old, but he looks like a successful contractor.
01:09:29.000 He's like a strong dude.
01:09:30.000 Yeah.
01:09:32.000 What were they thinking?
01:09:34.000 Was she always this ugly?
01:09:37.000 Oh, that's interesting.
01:09:38.000 If she lost her legs while they were together, you stick together.
01:09:41.000 Yeah, that's cool then.
01:09:44.000 You stand by your woman after she's paralyzed.
01:09:46.000 She doesn't really stand by her man as much.
01:09:49.000 When he first started dating her, his friends must have been like, hey, man, everything okay?
01:09:57.000 Do you want some money or something?
01:10:03.000 All right.
01:10:05.000 Very odd, John Taffervid.
01:10:08.000 You know, we have John Taffer here.
01:10:11.000 We do have him on the show.
01:10:12.000 Beer Day, I want to show you guys what happens when you pour a beer incorrectly.
01:10:17.000 You see, rookies who pour a beer pour it really slowly because they're scared it's going to foam up.
01:10:25.000 So they pour it really slow in the glass.
01:10:28.000 True.
01:10:29.000 And they serve the beer that way.
01:10:31.000 But a bartender who's in a hurry, who really knows the proper way of pouring a beer, will pour that beer much faster and fill the glass that way.
01:10:41.000 It's way too much head.
01:10:42.000 Which is better.
01:10:43.000 You see, when you pour a glass incorrectly, this is what happens in the stomach.
01:10:48.000 This beer was poured so easily, the gas is still in the beer.
01:10:51.000 In your stomach, this is what happens.
01:10:56.000 But when the beer is poured correctly and the gases are allowed to dissipate, look at what happens.
01:11:05.000 Which beer would you drink?
01:11:07.000 The one that bloats you or the one that doesn't?
01:11:10.000 Pour your beers right.
01:11:13.000 Wasn't it a weird video?
01:11:17.000 I think I'm right.
01:11:19.000 I mean, I've seen so many people pour drinks that give you salmonella.
01:11:24.000 And we're sitting in the car outside with a chick with blue hair and four nose rings, and then we have to Go shut it down, right?
01:11:31.000 Wait, why can't I see your face?
01:11:33.000 I'm loading up my camera.
01:11:35.000 Oh.
01:11:36.000 I have very good technology.
01:11:38.000 Yeah, but he might be right.
01:11:40.000 I've never heard of that before, but I don't want to be sitting there.
01:11:42.000 How long do I got to wait to drink that beer?
01:11:44.000 That's true.
01:11:45.000 Not only is it faster, it helps your gastrointestinal tract get used to the bubbles, so that way you're not bubblegut McGillicuddy walking around with farts.
01:11:56.000 What's that on your mouth?
01:11:58.000 This is my new invention called the lens reset.
01:12:01.000 So if your lens is ever askew, you can reset it.
01:12:06.000 Let's see, how do we get rid of that?
01:12:08.000 Why don't you shut that down?
01:12:09.000 I'm going to try to shut it shut down.
01:12:11.000 Okay.
01:12:12.000 Buya, nigga, motherfuckers.
01:12:15.000 By the way, people always ask why I say the N-word in a funny way, like I'm some sort of chicken.
01:12:20.000 I do it so when they make a montage, like they did to Joe Rogan and me, it'll sound funny.
01:12:30.000 Buya niga means I don't want that thing in Mandarin.
01:12:37.000 So this is about Brittany Grinier, and I agree with this dude.
01:12:40.000 I have a hunch about this bitch, and I'm totally pulling it out of my ass, but let's see if I'm right when it's time.
01:12:44.000 One, it's a dude with a dick, not a big one.
01:12:48.000 Two, Russians know he's a dude.
01:12:52.000 Three, he is ludicrously dumb, not only because he decided to smuggle weed through Moscow's international airport.
01:12:59.000 So does any of his teammates know?
01:13:02.000 Surely they shower together.
01:13:05.000 Maybe he just doesn't shower.
01:13:06.000 I think he's a dude.
01:13:07.000 I believe he's a dude.
01:13:09.000 And I think I read somewhere that Russia is demanding a DNA sample to make sure he goes to the right prison.
01:13:15.000 I saw that.
01:13:17.000 Then this guy goes on to say he wears thieves' star tattoos on his shoulders, which is a big deal because those are what Russian criminals wear and you have to earn them.
01:13:28.000 It's like, and if you do have them, you get a lot of respect because you've earned your thieves' stars.
01:13:34.000 But he obviously hasn't earned them.
01:13:35.000 So he's going to get the shit kicked out of him.
01:13:38.000 There they go.
01:13:39.000 DNA test to determine whether Grenier is male or female.
01:13:45.000 I don't care about him anymore.
01:13:48.000 Especially when I saw who they were trying to exchange him for.
01:13:53.000 Toronto Perv Police.
01:13:56.000 I have a quick question.
01:13:57.000 Is she like really, really good?
01:14:00.000 Like at basketball compared to the other females?
01:14:02.000 You know, because they're usually not so good.
01:14:05.000 I'll see if I can look up highlights in the meantime.
01:14:07.000 Yeah, is he like one of the top dunkers?
01:14:12.000 He's the only chick that can dunk in the NBA.
01:14:24.000 But you could hold back.
01:14:25.000 I mean, if you're so good, you can hold back.
01:14:32.000 They've got to lower that net for these chicks.
01:14:34.000 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:14:35.000 Why not?
01:14:38.000 What has there been?
01:14:39.000 Like seven WNBA women who can dunk in the entire history of the NBA?
01:14:45.000 I think there's been, remember we showed the numbers?
01:14:47.000 There's been like 100 dunks.
01:14:49.000 Meanwhile, in the male NBA, there's like 2,000 per player per season or some shit.
01:14:55.000 I don't watch basketball.
01:14:57.000 My Mets bet is on fire, by the way.
01:15:00.000 I'm at $1,600.
01:15:05.000 We went to...
01:15:07.000 What's the matter?
01:15:12.000 No way.
01:15:15.000 Holy shit.
01:15:17.000 Fuck, that's...
01:15:17.000 That's...
01:15:18.000 The best female player in the NBA is a dude.
01:15:22.000 WNBA.
01:15:23.000 Oh, man.
01:15:25.000 That is fucking funny.
01:15:27.000 Then they had this guy on the court.
01:15:28.000 I don't know if you saw him.
01:15:30.000 Dunking left and right.
01:15:32.000 Wow.
01:15:34.000 Yeah, look at the way he runs.
01:15:37.000 It looks different.
01:15:38.000 He looks different from.
01:15:39.000 He totally looks different.
01:15:43.000 Let's fucking go.
01:15:45.000 Screaming.
01:15:46.000 Have you noticed through these trannies?
01:15:48.000 Whenever you threaten them, they're like, I'll fucking put you in the hospital so fucking fast.
01:15:52.000 You messed with me.
01:15:53.000 You're messing with the...
01:15:55.000 You mess with the bull, you get the horns.
01:15:56.000 You go, ah, that's not what ladies do when they're mad.
01:16:01.000 I posted on Getter a picture of the London police with two fetish sickos.
01:16:07.000 And I said, what is it with British police and their obsession with gay admiration?
01:16:14.000 Like cop cars that are rainbow colored and posing in pictures and letting homos twerk on them and stuff.
01:16:22.000 It's really weird.
01:16:23.000 I mean, you'd think black recognition would be more important for them.
01:16:28.000 I mean, that's who's represented in the crime stats.
01:16:31.000 So you'd want to be friends with blacks and reach out to blacks more so everyone would be safer.
01:16:36.000 But gays, why do you fucking care?
01:16:38.000 Look, I looked this up.
01:16:40.000 Tallest WNBA players.
01:16:42.000 Zuma, that's the headline picture.
01:16:46.000 Oh my me.
01:16:47.000 I mean, she's not the tallest.
01:16:49.000 That freak of nature, which looks, you know, absurd.
01:16:52.000 That could be at the circus.
01:16:53.000 Yes.
01:16:54.000 That also looks absurd, like a freak.
01:16:57.000 Then you got just regular old guy.
01:16:59.000 Regular tall dude.
01:17:01.000 So besides the actual circus people, third six, nine, almost seven feet.
01:17:07.000 And then what's the other one?
01:17:08.000 That's why he wasn't so upset about going to jail because he was just going to fuck endless pussy.
01:17:14.000 Anyway, so someone sent in something saying, no, it's not just Britain.
01:17:18.000 Check out Canada.
01:17:18.000 They're also obsessed with this.
01:17:21.000 This is called Toronto Perv Police.
01:17:24.000 It's such a weird thing to want to be associated with.
01:17:29.000 Maybe it's because this affirmative action has made most cops, that's really dark, most cops like gays themselves.
01:17:41.000 And when you take the balls away, yeah, that looks better.
01:17:44.000 You take the balls away from a police department, you're going to end up attracting loser weirdos, degenerates, and women.
01:17:53.000 Galore.
01:17:54.000 You didn't show both pictures.
01:17:55.000 There's the other fat guys.
01:17:58.000 They're like puppy guys.
01:18:00.000 Why are they so fat?
01:18:05.000 At least the British gay fetishists are in shape.
01:18:09.000 Imagine hanging out with those guys and talking to them about Trump.
01:18:13.000 They love Batman.
01:18:14.000 There's no way they don't.
01:18:19.000 Can't prove it.
01:18:23.000 And this one's just called Feds.
01:18:25.000 It's a picture of an undercover policeman.
01:18:28.000 Kind of on topic today.
01:18:34.000 Yeah, guys, we can tell.
01:18:39.000 Not convincing.
01:18:40.000 I'm a lady.
01:18:42.000 Nigga, what the fuck?
01:18:44.000 Brittany Griner ass.
01:18:50.000 Okay, then there's the liquor store owner.
01:18:52.000 I mean, this is ancient Chinese secret, but on the off chance we didn't play it.
01:18:59.000 Have we shown this yet?
01:19:00.000 No.
01:19:00.000 It was everywhere last week.
01:19:01.000 I didn't get around to it.
01:19:02.000 Strategically tucked behind the counter, Cope whipped out his hidden shotgun and blasted the suspect in the arm.
01:19:09.000 As the man took off, another camera captured this.
01:19:15.000 The suspects, after nearly leaving one of their own behind, sped off in a black BMW X-3.
01:19:22.000 It's hard to tell.
01:19:24.000 He shot my arm up.
01:19:25.000 Speaking of that, did you see the Vegas Vape Shop one?
01:19:30.000 No, the guy stabbing?
01:19:33.000 Yeah, the Vegas Vape Shop.
01:19:34.000 And he stabbed the guy that jumped across the...
01:19:37.000 Yeah.
01:19:38.000 You know, Anthony and his buddy FBI Vinny were kind of debating on whether that was going to be self-defense or not.
01:19:43.000 Vinny FBI says no.
01:19:44.000 He's going to have a hard time in court saying that that was self-defense that you could actually use.
01:19:51.000 Anthony was like, well, when you're masked and you jump across the counter, anything could happen.
01:19:56.000 But then again, Vinny's from the FBI, was a lawyer.
01:20:00.000 And he's going to show it.
01:20:02.000 Because there's one of the stabs.
01:20:04.000 He seems to sever his spine.
01:20:06.000 I heard the guy's doing okay.
01:20:08.000 Okay.
01:20:09.000 But they're all like, owie, owie.
01:20:12.000 And then one is, oh, and I think he said, you can hear him go, I'm dead.
01:20:15.000 Yeah, it's pretty.
01:20:16.000 It's in the notes.
01:20:16.000 It's 6'5.
01:20:17.000 Gotcha.
01:20:19.000 Yeah, I got pretty grossed out hearing a guy be like, I'm dead.
01:20:23.000 I'm dead.
01:20:24.000 Like, that's so...
01:20:26.000 I've watched this 9,000 times.
01:20:28.000 I never saw him get his knife.
01:20:31.000 It's to the right of his.
01:20:35.000 I think that might be the handle right there.
01:20:37.000 Oh, no, no, no.
01:20:38.000 Like, before this, there's a longer video where it's right next to his register.
01:20:45.000 Has that got sound?
01:20:47.000 Okay.
01:20:51.000 Oh, stop me!
01:20:53.000 I'm dead!
01:20:54.000 I'm dead!
01:20:58.000 I wish they had the full video because then he like throws him at the door, basically.
01:21:03.000 Great example of why you should not wear flip-flops.
01:21:06.000 He was wearing flip-flops, fighting for his life.
01:21:08.000 Oh, in that case.
01:21:09.000 Okay, last one.
01:21:10.000 Small town police department disbanded for joke.
01:21:14.000 So first article, NSFW, guys, you're about to hear a racist joke and you're going to have nightmares all night.
01:21:20.000 It's horrific.
01:21:22.000 Oh, God.
01:21:25.000 So this police captain, police chief, texted someone, what do y'all call a pregnant slave?
01:21:33.000 BOGO.
01:21:34.000 Buy one, get one free.
01:21:35.000 That is terrible.
01:21:37.000 It's a really good joke, and it's structured well.
01:21:41.000 You know?
01:21:43.000 And, like, why is that racist?
01:21:45.000 I love how the guy really was, I think it might be, this guy's in trouble for, like, question mark is normal.
01:21:51.000 You're like, all right, what do you want, Steve?
01:21:54.000 And then the double question mark, no, really.
01:21:56.000 What is it?
01:21:58.000 Oh, you know what happened?
01:22:00.000 I met Sylvia the other day.
01:22:02.000 She was out trying to find a cigarette on the street in her nightgown.
01:22:06.000 And she goes, I can't see my husband.
01:22:10.000 He's never around.
01:22:11.000 The police won't let him near me because they say he hits me.
01:22:15.000 It's none of their business what he does to me.
01:22:16.000 I never called the cops on him, but he's scared.
01:22:19.000 And she goes, the new Rochelle Police Department, that's where she used to live.
01:22:23.000 Mr. Bulla's there.
01:22:26.000 They're fucking pigs.
01:22:27.000 I hate their guts.
01:22:29.000 So I call my buddy in the NRPD and I'm like, hey, Sylvia has a message for you.
01:22:33.000 And she's like, fuck you.
01:22:35.000 You ruined my life, you fucking pigs.
01:22:37.000 And I'm like, you guys suck.
01:22:38.000 And then she's like, they're NYPD rejects.
01:22:41.000 That's what they are.
01:22:42.000 And I'm like, yeah, you guys couldn't make it in the NYPD.
01:22:45.000 And the guy knew her.
01:22:48.000 No.
01:22:49.000 He goes, oh shit, Sylvia's there.
01:22:51.000 She's still alive.
01:22:52.000 Holy crap.
01:22:53.000 He goes, I arrested her husband a lot of times.
01:22:56.000 Wow.
01:22:56.000 Her husband did not like the blacks.
01:22:59.000 Her husband was Dominican, and some black gangsters killed his son.
01:23:03.000 And he was just a horrible, violent drunk who Sylvia wants back.
01:23:08.000 She might be here Thursday.
01:23:10.000 She said she'll do it for cigarettes.
01:23:11.000 If she has cigarettes, she'll die.
01:23:13.000 And someone, she managed, I said, no, I'm not buying you any, but she managed to scrounge one from this other old lady, the one I told you about at the beginning of the show, who said, was pissed off about Trump having notes in the toilet.
01:23:25.000 And she had two puffs, and she goes, Gavin, I got to sit down.
01:23:28.000 I got my head spinning in a million.
01:23:30.000 I said, sill, you're not supposed to smoke.
01:23:33.000 I had two drags.
01:23:35.000 Yeah, and now you feel like shit and have to sit down.
01:23:38.000 Oh, yeah.
01:23:39.000 Some of these people, what are you going to do?
01:23:41.000 I remember when we'd be feeding for a cigarette like all day, me and my loser friends.
01:23:46.000 And then when you finally get a cigarette, it's like six hours later.
01:23:49.000 And you just take one puff and you want to smoke the whole thing because you just miss cigarettes.
01:23:53.000 You take one puff and you're just so dizzy.
01:23:55.000 And you have to sit down and vomit if you can.
01:23:58.000 Maybe not vomit.
01:23:59.000 I have never understood smoking.
01:24:02.000 Like if the first time you try it, it's delicious.
01:24:04.000 I understand that.
01:24:05.000 But you have to, what, smoke a pack before you can learn?
01:24:09.000 Yeah, it took like months for me to like cigarettes.
01:24:12.000 Why?
01:24:14.000 I don't know.
01:24:17.000 So the next link is the bitches were successful.
01:24:25.000 Vincent's final police officer resigns from department.
01:24:29.000 Vincent has no police officers on the force tonight after both the chief and assistant chief were suspended following a racist text allegation, and the one remaining officer resigned.
01:24:40.000 So, our Lauren Harkson tonight has been following this story.
01:24:42.000 So, Lauren, where can you be?
01:24:45.000 Well, Catherine, while we could audibly tell last night at the city council meeting that several residents were glad to hear the Vincent police chief and assistant police chief were on suspension, the latest news is a completely different story.
01:24:59.000 I spoke with Vincent Mayor James Latimer earlier today, and he did confirm the final officer remaining in the department termed in his resignation via text message overnight.
01:25:09.000 Now, yesterday, the city council voted to pursue dissolving the police department entirely, but in the meantime, that one officer was appointed as interim chief.
01:25:18.000 Of course, that only lasted a few hours.
01:25:20.000 We spoke with Tina Franklin, who moved to Vincent in 2013, and she was disappointed to find out the news.
01:25:28.000 We were already rallying to make sure he stayed in place.
01:25:33.000 So we want him there.
01:25:34.000 He needs to represent us because we don't want to back down off of somebody and say, we left you out in the fire to burn.
01:25:41.000 We want him to know that he has our support here.
01:25:46.000 Wait, so the black people aren't even offended?
01:25:48.000 Whoa.
01:25:48.000 Who's offended?
01:25:49.000 Whoa.
01:25:50.000 By the way, it could have been a white slave.
01:25:52.000 Right.
01:25:53.000 We've had lots.
01:25:54.000 It could have been a Slav, the original slaves.
01:25:56.000 What a shitty logo.
01:25:57.000 It has a moire built into it.
01:26:00.000 Who designed your shit?
01:26:02.000 But wait a minute.
01:26:03.000 That reminds me of another article.
01:26:06.000 This woman, she submitted a white privilege card.
01:26:17.000 Where's that in the notes?
01:26:19.000 Yeah, 4-4.
01:26:22.000 She gets pulled over.
01:26:23.000 They ask to see her ID.
01:26:24.000 The police do.
01:26:25.000 She hands them a white privilege card.
01:26:28.000 And the Daily Beast is furious.
01:26:30.000 It works?
01:26:31.000 Yeah.
01:26:31.000 They laughed.
01:26:32.000 They laughed.
01:26:34.000 Like, in both of these stories, it's verboten for the police to enjoy themselves.
01:26:38.000 Right.
01:26:38.000 No.
01:26:39.000 No joking around for you.
01:26:40.000 The most stressful job in the world.
01:26:43.000 You have a gun pointed at the back of your head 24 hours a day.
01:26:47.000 You don't know if you're going to make it home.
01:26:49.000 And you're not allowed to let off some steam with a joke.
01:26:54.000 So this is above the law.
01:26:57.000 Like, this is why I hate the left.
01:26:59.000 They're anti-fun.
01:27:02.000 Some woman makes a joke.
01:27:03.000 A cop lets it roll off his back.
01:27:06.000 He gives her a nudge, nudge, wink, wink.
01:27:08.000 And they both go on with their fun day here in Funland.
01:27:12.000 Not acceptable says, what's his name?
01:27:15.000 Dan Layden Hall?
01:27:18.000 Is that the author's name?
01:27:20.000 Yep.
01:27:20.000 Always look up the authors, guys.
01:27:26.000 Wait, Dan Layden Hall, and that's Daily Beast?
01:27:30.000 Did anybody step on him?
01:27:32.000 I wonder if he's gay.
01:27:33.000 Because if Dan Layden Hall, I mean, there's lots of foot traffic.
01:27:38.000 They never have pictures.
01:27:39.000 Even Will Summers, like, he's got one picture.
01:27:42.000 Isn't that weird?
01:27:43.000 All of these writers?
01:27:45.000 Well, they work hard to get themselves off, but The Daily Beast has a picture of him.
01:27:50.000 And here he is on Twitter.
01:27:54.000 He's got to be gay.
01:27:54.000 He's got a gay face.
01:27:56.000 Ah, he's British.
01:28:00.000 Oh, no.
01:28:01.000 How can he not be gay?
01:28:05.000 Sorry, that guy's gay.
01:28:07.000 Look at his face.
01:28:08.000 That's a gay face.
01:28:09.000 He looks like Anthony Jeslinik, except, you know, miscarriages and cancer.
01:28:14.000 Except gay.
01:28:15.000 Except gay.
01:28:18.000 Alright, let's get to the final vid.
01:28:20.000 I agree.
01:28:37.000 Let's do 5'9.
01:28:39.000 This ridiculously talented man does OnlyFans version of Seinfeld, and it is out of the park.
01:28:47.000 Quality.
01:28:52.000 So she has an OnlyFans.
01:28:53.000 I mean, what's the big deal?
01:28:55.000 Jeremy, I should be her OnlyFan.
01:28:59.000 Well, it sounds to me like you're a smut, Jamie.
01:29:02.000 No, no, I'm post-slut, Jeremy.
01:29:04.000 You know, I'm post-sleut.
01:29:05.000 Pro-slut?
01:29:06.000 Pro-slut?
01:29:08.000 You understand why everyone gets to see her naked when I'm still stuck in the first place?
01:29:15.000 You know I'm having an only fans.
01:29:25.000 You have an only pants?
01:29:28.000 You ain't paying.
01:29:29.000 You ain't playing.
01:29:31.000 That's the thing.
01:29:32.000 I'm paying.
01:29:33.000 I'm going for a meal.
01:29:34.000 A meal, Jappy.
01:29:36.000 A bacon egg and cheese is not a meal.
01:29:39.000 Dash.
01:29:41.000 All right, so she has an old.
01:29:43.000 What do you think as a fellow mimic?
01:29:45.000 I think my buddy Jason Scoop has a better Kramer, but that was really well done.
01:29:49.000 Yeah.
01:29:50.000 Quality.
01:29:51.000 All right, folks, so we are a nation in decline.
01:29:54.000 That is a fact.
01:29:55.000 We are living in a third world where the lunatics are running the asylum and the blind are leading the blind.
01:30:01.000 It's an absolute ship of fools.
01:30:03.000 Every colloquialism under the book.
01:30:05.000 In the book?
01:30:06.000 Under the sun?
01:30:09.000 But there is hope for this nation.
01:30:10.000 We've been through worse before.
01:30:12.000 We'll get him in the midterms.
01:30:13.000 We'll get him in 2024.
01:30:15.000 In the interim, this war on Trump is a war on you.
01:30:20.000 That's who they're really out to get.
01:30:21.000 Trump is just standing in the way.
01:30:23.000 And it looks like they're about to get him out of the way.
01:30:26.000 So you're next.
01:30:27.000 And what is the solution when you're next and your own government is out to get you?
01:30:32.000 Fight.
01:30:34.000 Do not go gladly into that darkness.
01:30:37.000 Quietly into the night.
01:30:38.000 However, that thing goes.
01:30:40.000 Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
01:30:44.000 And get fired.
01:30:44.000 Get in trouble.
01:30:45.000 Be brave.
01:30:46.000 And never stop fighting.