Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - July 14, 2023


S4E271 - TERRIBLE TITS, TOO (Part 1)


Episode Stats

Length

50 minutes

Words per Minute

162.56393

Word Count

8,158

Sentence Count

824

Misogynist Sentences

28

Hate Speech Sentences

35


Summary

In this episode of Get Off My Lawn, Gavin and Ryan discuss The New South Wales' new reality TV show 'The Strokes' and the band's new album 'Living At The O'O'. They also talk about The Strokes new record deal with Columbia Records and how they got their name from a song that was written by a 12 year old boy. Also, they talk about the new Silverfish video and how it's not as bad as you think it is. It's a bit of a mess, but it's a good mess. Enjoy! Get off my lawn! -Gavin McInnes Logo by Courtney DeKorte. Theme by Mavus White. Music by PSOVOD and tyops. All rights reserved. Used by permission. If you like what you hear, please leave us a review on Apple Podcasts. Subscribe, rate and review on iTunes, and tell a friend about what you think of the show. We'll be looking out for the next episode next week. Thank you so much for all the support, love, bye. Gavin & Ryan. XOXO. -The Best Fiends -P.S. -Gav & Ryan -A.K.A. -R.I. -The Good Life Podcast - The Good Life Project -The Bad Life Project - Thank you for all your support and support. This episode was produced and edited by Gav's work. Thank you, Ryan and Gav is a lot of work. Love ya'll! -A very much love ya'll. -KIMY! -BEN JUICY -JUYO -S.R.Y.E.B.O.T. -PODCAST -HAPPY BECAUSE I LOVE YOU! -SORRY, GAVY OFF MY LAY OFF YOUR MONDAY! -GRAFF OFF YOUR PLACE! -ROS OFF MY LAKE, BABY'S PODCAST! -JAYE, SONGS, GRAFFY, KEVY, JAYE'S, GOULDY, GABY, DADDY, RYAN AND KEVAN, JEAN O' CHEESE, KAVY, MOSCHI, JARED, JOKED, MAYO, AND KELLY, EAGLE, JOSY, AND JAYA'S SONDS, JORDY, POTTERY, VAN PEDED, DOUBLED, COURSY, AYO, DOGS, AND AVAILABLE, LOUD, BOUGHTY, BOULDER, AND MALONEY, AND MORE!


Transcript

00:00:14.000 Live from New York, it's Get Off My Lawn with Gavin McInnes!
00:00:49.000 Welcome to the show.
00:00:50.000 Welcome to a wee bit of sanity in a world gone mad.
00:00:56.000 That was the 415s.
00:00:59.000 Their big hit, Living at the O. Similar to their super hit, Beer Run.
00:01:06.000 That's all I know about these awesome guys because they chose the stupidest fucking name in the world.
00:01:10.000 Uh-oh.
00:01:12.000 They chose their area code.
00:01:13.000 I actually think that was changes by these New South Wales.
00:01:19.000 Oh, shit.
00:01:20.000 These are the Monday show notes.
00:01:22.000 Somebody's got a case of the Mondays on Friday, on the Fridays.
00:01:25.000 New South Wales.
00:01:25.000 Yeah.
00:01:26.000 Sorry.
00:01:28.000 The New South Wales are an awesome band from, obviously, Australia, and they've got a reality show out.
00:01:36.000 It's like Spinal Tap.
00:01:37.000 So the band is real, but the joke is fake.
00:01:42.000 So, pull that up.
00:01:44.000 Oh, I have something to send you you're gonna love, Ryan.
00:01:46.000 Pull that up, man.
00:01:48.000 Yeah, you're gonna love this.
00:01:49.000 Uh-oh, is it mean to me?
00:01:51.000 No, it's really nice to you.
00:01:54.000 I'm dubious of you, McInnes.
00:01:57.000 Why would I ever be mean to you?
00:02:00.000 Is that good entertainment?
00:02:01.000 Yes!
00:02:02.000 Oh my god.
00:02:03.000 Even I'll admit it.
00:02:04.000 Go to 1-2?
00:02:05.000 Fucking 1-2.
00:02:07.000 So I just discovered this show because of this song actually when I was looking up the band and they're pretty good actors.
00:02:12.000 It's fun.
00:02:14.000 These New South Wales, these New South Wales are the punk flood of the Concords but their hit mockumentary blurs the line between comedy and reality.
00:02:23.000 So I think they do this this shit at actual shows.
00:02:26.000 Go to the bottom there's a video there.
00:02:29.000 Hit it.
00:02:35.000 Australia is going through a fucking renaissance.
00:02:37.000 My cop buddy Mike says, no, no, it's always been like that.
00:02:42.000 The Saints, celibate rifles, the hard-ons.
00:02:45.000 Yeah, this feels different.
00:02:47.000 This, the new Australia hits different.
00:02:50.000 Film that.
00:02:57.000 I was Bronson in Round the Twist.
00:02:59.000 What the fuck?
00:03:00.000 My dad used to fuck Jeff's mum.
00:03:02.000 I mean, it looks like total shit.
00:03:03.000 Yeah, baby!
00:03:04.000 Getting this record deal is a breaking point in your career.
00:03:07.000 This is the day it all changed.
00:03:08.000 This is Pelvis, Elvis impersonator, but most importantly, band manager.
00:03:12.000 Elvis never had a beard.
00:03:13.000 Mate, you're a fucking idiot.
00:03:14.000 You never tell the band who's coming to the show.
00:03:16.000 Jimmy Barnes is coming.
00:03:20.000 The Australian industry has done nothing but ignored us.
00:03:22.000 We're still interested, but it's going to cost you.
00:03:25.000 Yeah, triple.
00:03:26.000 It's absolutely packed, front to back.
00:03:28.000 The whole thing's packed!
00:03:30.000 The singer's nervous.
00:03:35.000 So it looks cool.
00:03:37.000 You know, bands, I've said this a million times, kids who went to boarding school are funny, because you're just with dudes all the time riffing.
00:03:45.000 Similarly, guys in bands are all funny and good actors and getting good at it, if you will.
00:03:53.000 Like Portlandia, right?
00:03:54.000 How good are Fred and Carrie?
00:03:56.000 It's because they're in a van for nine hours driving, just riffing.
00:04:00.000 There should be more Spinal Tap type shows.
00:04:03.000 They're gifted.
00:04:05.000 Musicians are funny.
00:04:06.000 The Strokes are really funny.
00:04:08.000 And that's boarding school kids who are also in a band.
00:04:11.000 Double whammy.
00:04:12.000 And they're huge comedy fans.
00:04:15.000 I think David Cross did a video with them, didn't he?
00:04:18.000 Look that up, Jamie.
00:04:19.000 By the way, did you see the video I sent you?
00:04:20.000 Yeah, what the f- Did you put that there?
00:04:23.000 Show it.
00:04:24.000 There's a little silverfish.
00:04:26.000 I hate those things.
00:04:26.000 Did you put that there?
00:04:28.000 Yes.
00:04:28.000 Because that's why it's limping?
00:04:29.000 Because you crushed his leg?
00:04:30.000 No, he's trying to figure out how to get down.
00:04:32.000 He's there now.
00:04:33.000 That video- No, he's gone.
00:04:35.000 No, he's somewhere there.
00:04:36.000 Well, fuck.
00:04:39.000 I know you hate bugs, so it's really hard to catch a silverfish because they're so flat, but I got on a piece of paper.
00:04:44.000 I got on my hands.
00:04:45.000 I put it on your buttons.
00:04:47.000 It was there for a while, but you had to go take a nine-hour shit.
00:04:50.000 You're really pushing my bug-tins.
00:04:52.000 So he escaped to the top, and if he's not there now, he's probably underneath, just waiting to skittle out across your fingies.
00:05:03.000 So there is a silverfish lurking, and they love the warmth, so he's not going anywhere.
00:05:08.000 I'm gonna start a fire.
00:05:09.000 Yeah.
00:05:09.000 Away from me.
00:05:10.000 I hate their name, too.
00:05:12.000 Silverfish?
00:05:12.000 I know.
00:05:13.000 Fuck off.
00:05:14.000 Where'd you get the fish?
00:05:16.000 What's fish?
00:05:17.000 I'll puke.
00:05:19.000 I used to eat shit like that for a dare.
00:05:21.000 You're kidding.
00:05:22.000 Yeah, yeah.
00:05:22.000 I used to eat ants.
00:05:23.000 I'd eat ants, a sandwich off the floor.
00:05:26.000 But, I'd still eat a sandwich off the floor just to gross people out.
00:05:29.000 But, uh... Yeah, after hearing about that guy who... Oh my God!
00:05:33.000 What?!
00:05:34.000 What?
00:05:36.000 Is it over there?
00:05:37.000 Yeah.
00:05:40.000 How do you get down so fast?
00:05:46.000 I don't know why I feel like it's a good sign that we see silverfish, not mice.
00:05:51.000 Yeah.
00:05:51.000 Oh, because if there was a mouse, he'd probably eat it.
00:05:53.000 I don't know if that makes sense.
00:05:54.000 Maybe.
00:05:55.000 No, that's.
00:05:57.000 But if there's mammals, there's like more food around.
00:06:00.000 But if you're down to prehistoric animals like a silverfish, we're really scraping the bottom of the barrel as far as pests go.
00:06:08.000 Now I feel stuff all over my body, and it's not there.
00:06:11.000 Good.
00:06:11.000 That was my goal.
00:06:13.000 Yes, some mice eat insects, but not all do.
00:06:17.000 Fruit, chocolate, cereal, dog food, basin, spice, peanut butter.
00:06:20.000 Okay, thank you.
00:06:21.000 Here's the, remember we were talking about the 1975 last week?
00:06:24.000 They're getting canceled for making it, for being on a podcast where Nick, what's his name?
00:06:30.000 Mullin.
00:06:31.000 What?
00:06:31.000 Mullin.
00:06:32.000 Nick Mullin made a joke, a funny joke, a smart joke, about what it would be like at the,
00:06:38.000 Holocaust with the Japanese Guard.
00:06:41.000 These linen suits are so thin that they lose their shape.
00:06:47.000 Look at that.
00:06:47.000 You can see the back of my top button.
00:06:50.000 You got a sort of extra iron linen.
00:06:53.000 To form it?
00:06:55.000 Yeah.
00:06:56.000 It just becomes a blob.
00:06:58.000 Collars are staying there.
00:06:58.000 That's good.
00:06:59.000 Yeah, maybe I'm wrong.
00:07:00.000 Maybe my dry cleaner just fucked up.
00:07:02.000 My last dry cleaning bill was two suits like this.
00:07:05.000 Maybe four shirts.
00:07:06.000 Guess how much it was?
00:07:09.000 $86?
00:07:09.000 Mine was two pairs of pants, four shirts, $43.
00:07:17.000 Oh, I gotta change my, I gotta, you know what I'm gonna do?
00:07:22.000 I'm gonna start bringing all my shit here to the hood.
00:07:25.000 I just, I don't like that they don't speak English and shit like that, but fuck it.
00:07:29.000 No more rich suburban dry cleaners.
00:07:32.000 Starting today, guys.
00:07:33.000 Mark my words.
00:07:33.000 Which reminds you, reminds me, that this is the Friday Show.
00:07:38.000 We'll get to the funny 1975 guy in a second.
00:07:42.000 I'm on Purple Works right now.
00:07:44.000 I'm on this drug.
00:07:48.000 Larry Barnes said to me, I have the most heart out of any boxer in the gym.
00:07:52.000 Really?
00:07:52.000 He said, heart, you're a ten.
00:07:55.000 I go, what about fighting?
00:07:56.000 He goes, three.
00:07:56.000 It's not bad.
00:07:59.000 Oh well, it's not zero.
00:08:01.000 That's the funny thing about men.
00:08:02.000 When we get like a bad score, we're just like, yep.
00:08:07.000 Like if some chick went up to me and she went, looks wise you're like a five.
00:08:10.000 I'd go, oh okay, that sucks.
00:08:13.000 I was hoping it would be more than that.
00:08:15.000 You tell a woman she's ugly and it's like, that's assault.
00:08:20.000 I'm Robert F. Kennedy, Jr.
00:08:22.000 Okay, let me try this.
00:08:23.000 I'm Robert F. Kennedy, Jr.
00:08:24.000 and I would like to tell you about a great American company, Purple Works Nutrition.
00:08:29.000 You've probably seen the viral videos of me pumping iron and doing push-ups.
00:08:35.000 Purple Works pre-workout is the reason I'm able to drop sets of 50 pounds in the blazing California sun.
00:08:42.000 This pre-workout is American-made.
00:08:45.000 They have no artificial dyes, preservatives, or hidden RNA vaccines.
00:08:51.000 Unlike other products, Purpleworks Nutrition Pink Lemonade pre-workout does not cause autism.
00:08:59.000 You wanna steer clear, he must get so tired talking like that.
00:09:02.000 Yeah, that was an exhausting celeb mailbag to do.
00:09:05.000 You wanna, cause you gotta tense your stomach muscles.
00:09:07.000 My abs, yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:09:08.000 But I'm on pre-workout, so I don't mind.
00:09:10.000 By the way, three weeks away from the gym, first week back, we're Friday now, the rotundness is gone.
00:09:18.000 I'm still fat, but that sort of balloon belly is gone.
00:09:22.000 And I think part of it too is like, you're drinking at night and you go, oh fuck, I gotta hit the gym tomorrow, I don't wanna be dry heaving the whole time.
00:09:28.000 So I'm gonna stop.
00:09:30.000 Whereas if you know you're not going to the gym the next day, you're like, I might as well have one more!
00:09:33.000 Yeah.
00:09:35.000 For me, it's eating late.
00:09:37.000 Oh yeah, I keep forgetting how much less fun you are.
00:09:40.000 You want to steer clear of some of these other pre-workout products like they were a 1961 Lincoln Continental with the top down on a cool November afternoon in Dallas.
00:09:51.000 A lot of the science is saying that I crush it at the gym and that I am shredded, jacked, and single-handedly changing the Democratic Party.
00:10:00.000 I've never taken HGH or any other steroid.
00:10:02.000 These muscles are from Purple Work's high-quality blend of kerosene... No.
00:10:08.000 Karnasin.
00:10:10.000 Karnasin?
00:10:10.000 Karnasin, beta alanine, caffeine, vitamins, and green tree extract.
00:10:16.000 Does he want you to be reading this?
00:10:19.000 I don't know.
00:10:20.000 It could be totally possible.
00:10:21.000 Gavin, you have the day off from the Purpleworks ad.
00:10:23.000 Ryan is going to be doing the RFK impression.
00:10:26.000 Oh.
00:10:27.000 Uh-oh.
00:10:27.000 Okay, Ryan.
00:10:28.000 Do you have the email?
00:10:29.000 Yeah, you do.
00:10:30.000 So start at green tree extract.
00:10:35.000 Green tea extract.
00:10:37.000 And you've got to set up your RFK Jr.
00:10:38.000 face.
00:10:39.000 Is that going to take a while?
00:10:40.000 I'll just finish this paragraph.
00:10:42.000 Have you ever wondered how I have the strength to appear on every podcast known to man?
00:10:47.000 You guessed it.
00:10:49.000 Purple works.
00:10:49.000 Rework out.
00:10:50.000 Okay, you do the last paragraph.
00:10:54.000 Okay.
00:10:55.000 I got two computers here.
00:10:56.000 I'm on it now.
00:10:57.000 Last paragraph, here we go.
00:10:59.000 If my wife Cheryl, right?
00:11:00.000 Yes.
00:11:01.000 Okay.
00:11:02.000 Now just the face is still loading.
00:11:04.000 You know, they say you should put it in the shaker and then have it over the course of the workout.
00:11:08.000 That's great.
00:11:09.000 Chacun Songu.
00:11:11.000 But I like to, I just have a thing of water.
00:11:13.000 I'm already dehydrated in the morning anyway.
00:11:15.000 I take, I don't do a whole scoop as I told you a million times.
00:11:18.000 I take like a teaspoon.
00:11:19.000 I plop it in.
00:11:20.000 I shake it around and then I just go.
00:11:23.000 And I drink it all in one.
00:11:24.000 Because they say it takes half an hour to get going, and if I do it at 9, by the time I get to my workout at 9.30, I've got the spring, the tingles!
00:11:35.000 The prickly hands.
00:11:36.000 Of course.
00:11:37.000 The tingles are one of the most important parts about it, because you can feel it working.
00:11:42.000 As Americans, we like to see the results.
00:11:44.000 Wait, wait.
00:11:45.000 The video's all fucked up.
00:11:47.000 We like to feel the results, too.
00:11:49.000 And so that's the important thing about Purpleworks Nutrition.
00:11:52.000 And by the way, if my wife Cheryl allows me, I'm looking forward to trying their brand new line of Italian coffees.
00:11:58.000 I love coffee.
00:11:59.000 Everybody knows.
00:12:01.000 I used to be addicted to stimulants, basically.
00:12:04.000 But my uncle and father both loved fine Italian coffee at a very low price point.
00:12:09.000 So Purple Works is now instant coffee and two varieties of ground organic coffee.
00:12:14.000 And a gigantic 2.2 pound bag of coffee that I could easily bench press because of the Purple Works pre-workout flowing through my veins at all times.
00:12:22.000 And they've done studies on this too.
00:12:24.000 It's perfectly safe.
00:12:26.000 And so all of that at highly competitive prices.
00:12:28.000 You can compare it with any sort of other tube or tub.
00:12:32.000 Rfk, are you mad that I imitated you at the beginning of that ad?
00:12:35.000 The pain of your growing penis?
00:12:36.000 Oh, groin.
00:12:57.000 Yeah, I guess so, because you're tensing your stomach muscles.
00:13:00.000 You know, those same muscles really help your golf swing.
00:13:03.000 Tensing your lower stomach muscles and your swing keeps it straight.
00:13:07.000 That's why I have the record for longest drive.
00:13:09.000 It's 800 yards.
00:13:11.000 I have an 800-yard drive.
00:13:12.000 Wow.
00:13:13.000 Yes.
00:13:13.000 That's longer than most entire holes.
00:13:16.000 Thank you.
00:13:17.000 Most holes are like 500, 300.
00:13:20.000 I appreciate it.
00:13:23.000 Look that up, Jamie.
00:13:24.000 What is the average length of a golf hole?
00:13:30.000 Now you know how this works, folks.
00:13:32.000 Oh, that silverfish is really cooking!
00:13:36.000 For men, a typical par-3 hole is less than 250 yards in length, with a par-4 hole ranging between 251 to 450 yards.
00:13:43.000 And a par-5 hole, being longer than 450 yards, for women these boundaries are lower.
00:13:55.000 I would have thought it was when I play, uh, when I play golf, uh, what do you call it?
00:14:00.000 CGI fucking computer generated golf driving range.
00:14:05.000 Yeah.
00:14:06.000 Virtual golf.
00:14:07.000 It's, uh, 500 is very common.
00:14:11.000 Yeah.
00:14:11.000 That's why, you know, hole-in-ones, I guess, are possible.
00:14:15.000 Did I tell you someone's doing a documentary about me?
00:14:17.000 They've been following me around for a while?
00:14:18.000 Yes.
00:14:19.000 And I mentioned it in Celeb Mailbag.
00:14:22.000 I was talking to him yesterday and I was like, what you want to avoid in a documentary is a Wikipedia page.
00:14:27.000 like uh uh they will he will not divide us it's a really good documentary but it gets tedious because it's just chronological this happened at this time joey shithead's book about doa is like that too it's just a list no you gotta like the movie adaptation you gotta wow them in the third act and plot against the president
00:14:49.000 Plot Against the President is a fantastic documentary, even though it doesn't use that much video, there's a lot of just pictures.
00:14:56.000 Because, Amanda, what are you doing?
00:14:58.000 I just filmed that right now.
00:15:08.000 Ugh.
00:15:09.000 I really don't like those things.
00:15:11.000 And usually bugs don't even piss me off that much.
00:15:12.000 How old is that thing?
00:15:13.000 It must be 200 million years old.
00:15:16.000 Plot Against the President is a great movie because Amanda Milius, the daughter of John Milius, who did Conan the Barbarian and Dirty Harry, she understands timing and she understands building a story.
00:15:28.000 First act, you introduce the characters.
00:15:30.000 We get to know you.
00:15:32.000 Second act, things are going okay but there's some conflict.
00:15:36.000 And it's getting bad.
00:15:37.000 Third act, utter catastrophe and resolution.
00:15:43.000 That's how you do.
00:15:44.000 A documentary is still a movie.
00:15:46.000 So we'll see if it works out with them.
00:15:48.000 Anyway.
00:15:49.000 They're kind of cute.
00:15:51.000 That makes me hate them way less.
00:15:53.000 By seeing their endearing little eyes.
00:15:56.000 Oh wait, I guess my framing is a little off.
00:15:58.000 There you go.
00:15:59.000 He's cute.
00:16:00.000 Cute little guy.
00:16:01.000 He's fine.
00:16:02.000 Never mind.
00:16:02.000 It's just his legs suck.
00:16:05.000 Well, that's the problem, too.
00:16:05.000 I was trying to grab him, and every time I grabbed him, he just said, fine.
00:16:08.000 I'm letting go with that leg.
00:16:09.000 I have plenty more.
00:16:11.000 You know what I did the other day?
00:16:12.000 What?
00:16:12.000 I was cleaning up the studio, because I knew we had the film guys come in.
00:16:16.000 And the glue traps, there was a fly, like a living fly on it, like this.
00:16:19.000 He was like... He was like trying to get off.
00:16:22.000 And so I took, I was on the phone, I think with Maddie, and I'm just like casually talking to him and then trying to like free him from the glue trap with like a safety pin.
00:16:29.000 Just like trying to pluck his legs out.
00:16:31.000 Oh, lost a leg.
00:16:32.000 And then by the time I took him off, he was just like, what the fuck?
00:16:36.000 Thanks.
00:16:38.000 Thanks.
00:16:40.000 I guess I'll fly away now and never land.
00:16:44.000 You took my landing gear.
00:16:45.000 OK, get back to that 1975 being brilliant thing.
00:16:49.000 We've got some great My Pet Bidens today, by the way, that you're going to miss if you're watching this for free.
00:16:55.000 ...control the songs.
00:16:56.000 I don't control the songs.
00:16:57.000 They can cut me off at any point when I start, whatever, whenever I start talking to somebody I don't like.
00:17:05.000 And I've been thinking about trans people in sports.
00:17:10.000 So they stole her bit.
00:17:12.000 Yeah, they did.
00:17:13.000 It is kind of the mailbag.
00:17:17.000 Keep going, shithead.
00:17:18.000 Oh, I thought that was it.
00:17:19.000 Not right wing, but it's like... I don't think it's a racist thing to say a fuck song.
00:17:27.000 Okay, a black guy, a Jewish guy... All the songs.
00:17:33.000 The guys can cut me off whenever they want to stop me talking about some nonsense, you know?
00:17:40.000 It's not up to me.
00:17:40.000 I had this like Indian taxi driver today.
00:17:46.000 Wait, we gotta use that riff.
00:17:47.000 What song is that?
00:17:50.000 Asian people, that's all he said.
00:17:52.000 What's that song?
00:17:53.000 We have to use it.
00:17:53.000 What, you think I know the girl bands?
00:17:56.000 This is satirical genius.
00:17:57.000 Oh, that's a good song.
00:17:59.000 That is really smart, though.
00:18:00.000 What a brilliant way to do a joke.
00:18:02.000 And that is a great way to lampoon the left and cancel culture without actually doing it, you know, without actually getting fired and having everyone... I know I say get fired, but you know what I mean?
00:18:12.000 Without ruining your band and ending the tour.
00:18:19.000 Also in the news, I saw something that might explain everything I've ever wondered about Ryan.
00:18:27.000 You can be an adult who doesn't have these eyes and still have Down syndrome.
00:18:36.000 I don't look Downsy.
00:18:39.000 Check out this.
00:18:40.000 Now, your daughter is a genius, so that helps refute it.
00:18:44.000 It does skip a generation.
00:18:46.000 No, it doesn't, actually, retard.
00:18:50.000 I wasn't diagnosed with Down syndrome until I was in my 20s and had two daughters with the condition.
00:18:55.000 Here's the subtle symptoms I ignored for years.
00:18:59.000 One, I was acting retarded.
00:19:01.000 Two, pennies are delicious, but they hurt on the way out.
00:19:05.000 Three, I'm strong!
00:19:08.000 Four.
00:19:08.000 Transformers is cool!
00:19:11.000 Four.
00:19:12.000 I thought Hulk was a bad guy.
00:19:14.000 He's not.
00:19:14.000 He's just troubled.
00:19:15.000 Yeah.
00:19:17.000 What were her symptoms?
00:19:18.000 She has a rarer form of Down syndrome that only affects her brain.
00:19:22.000 Go down.
00:19:22.000 No, go back up.
00:19:26.000 That only affects 2% of blah, blah, blah.
00:19:27.000 It doesn't always lead to physical symptoms.
00:19:29.000 Growing up, she said she struggled academically at times.
00:19:32.000 You know how many times she said, I'm sorry, I'm like retarded.
00:19:35.000 What do you do again?
00:19:36.000 I bet she's said it 100 times, she's been like, I'm a fucking complete retard, you guys.
00:19:40.000 I basically have Down Syndrome.
00:19:42.000 No, but seriously, what is it?
00:19:47.000 And then her doctor goes, you know that joke you always make about how you're basically a retard?
00:19:52.000 You are.
00:19:53.000 Apparently God didn't like that too much.
00:19:55.000 Yeah.
00:19:57.000 Well, she definitely didn't say it after she had those kids.
00:20:00.000 Right.
00:20:00.000 It's like after you have a daughter, you'll never go to a strip club again.
00:20:03.000 Oh, you have to say goodbye to strip clubs.
00:20:04.000 Did you know that?
00:20:06.000 Ah, dude, I was never really a big fan of fucking strip clubs, dude.
00:20:10.000 What is this, RFK Burr?
00:20:11.000 Yeah, we're both from Boston.
00:20:12.000 It's contagious, bro.
00:20:14.000 Oh, shit.
00:20:15.000 Ah, dude, it's like every fucking time, right?
00:20:18.000 It's like I'm at the cash register, and there's like this chick.
00:20:21.000 Right, I bet she's white.
00:20:22.000 Ah, dude, she's a fucking white chick.
00:20:24.000 She's got the latte in her hand.
00:20:26.000 She's like, oh, Bill, it's brutal.
00:20:29.000 I'm like, dude, shut up, dude.
00:20:34.000 Um, slightly more serious topic here.
00:20:39.000 I hate these dumb interrogations that we have in the American political system where they have Mark Zuckerberg or Elon Musk or someone sit down and they get questioned by politicians.
00:20:54.000 There's never an answer.
00:20:55.000 Wait.
00:20:56.000 Wait, what's going on?
00:20:57.000 Like, God bless these kids, I'm not going to talk about it, but that guy looks more downsy than her.
00:21:02.000 Is there a chance he, like, gaslit her?
00:21:04.000 He's like, no, you're probably, like, retarded.
00:21:07.000 I'm chill.
00:21:08.000 He looks downsy.
00:21:09.000 I think the girl on the far right has Down syndrome, and the person on the far left has Down syndrome.
00:21:14.000 And the kid is normal.
00:21:15.000 It's sort of like politics.
00:21:18.000 I'm totally bypassing the kids, but the dad, to me, looks way more downsy.
00:21:22.000 No, it's terrible theory, comment.
00:21:24.000 Railroad's the show.
00:21:25.000 You went backwards.
00:21:27.000 So don't interrupt me to go back to something if it's not incredibly important.
00:21:33.000 And if it's a retarded observation about a retard that's not retarded, then shut up.
00:21:38.000 Okay?
00:21:39.000 Dude, that's fucking brutal.
00:21:42.000 So, if they were forced to be honest, and they could be charged with contempt of court, and we had discovery where we've seen the emails, and the answer from him is merely a formality, then yeah, I'll watch it.
00:21:56.000 But look at how ineffectual this is, 1-6.
00:22:00.000 How many feds were at Jan 6?
00:22:02.000 The answer, by the way, is tons, as confirmed by Tucker Carlson talking to the chief of Capitol Police.
00:22:09.000 But what do you say in this kangaroo court that means nothing?
00:22:14.000 Were either FBI employees or people that the FBI had made contact with were in the January 6 entry of the Capitol.
00:22:25.000 By the way, stop.
00:22:26.000 You know you got good shoulders when you can wear a dress shirt without a blazer and you still look like you have a blazer on.
00:22:33.000 He looks like he's wearing football pads.
00:22:36.000 That's the kind of shoulders every man wants.
00:22:39.000 Is that the Paula Poundstone collection?
00:22:41.000 Or maybe he has shoulder pads in his shirt.
00:22:45.000 So I really need to be careful here talking about where we have or have not used confidential human sources.
00:22:52.000 So why are you here?
00:22:53.000 Why are you at this interrogation?
00:22:55.000 And why is the guy behind you about to pop?
00:22:59.000 Keep that guy away from all sharp objects.
00:23:03.000 Was there one or more individuals that would fit that description on January 6th that were in or around the Capitol?
00:23:09.000 I believe there is a filing in one of the January 6th cases that can provide a little more information about this.
00:23:15.000 I'm asking you.
00:23:16.000 I'm asking you.
00:23:19.000 Was there one or more?
00:23:20.000 I mean, you would know if there was at least one individual who worked for the FBI who entered the Capitol on that day.
00:23:27.000 I can't, again, I just can't speak to that here, but I'm happy to get the court filing that... Look, it's been two years, and you're now... Joe Biggs is still in prison.
00:23:36.000 ...the gentleman asks these questions, makes all kinds of insinuations, and you nod your head yes, and then I ask you simply, was there one or more?
00:23:45.000 And you won't answer that.
00:23:47.000 So I'm going to make the assumption that there was more than one, more than five, more than ten, and that you're ducking the question because you don't want to answer for the fact that you had at least one and somehow missed understanding that some of the individuals were very dangerous and that there were others inciting individuals to enter the Capitol after others broke windows.
00:24:13.000 Child.
00:24:13.000 Okay, Ms.
00:24:13.000 I'm just going to move on.
00:24:14.000 Child.
00:24:14.000 Ms.
00:24:16.000 And I think the D.C.
00:24:18.000 courts, the federal government actually, should be on the hook for a lawsuit for Ethan Nordin, Zach Greel, and Joe Biggs.
00:24:27.000 All bets are off if feds are in a riot.
00:24:30.000 Right?
00:24:38.000 It would make sense if they were there trying to stop stuff from happening.
00:24:42.000 That's the only way that would make sense.
00:24:44.000 Yes.
00:24:46.000 I was looking at liberal Twitter today and I've noticed they do this thing where they just when there's a called a conspiracy theory when there's a theory from the right if anyone refutes it in any way you're like
00:24:59.000 It's been debunked.
00:25:01.000 Like Ray Epps.
00:25:02.000 We think Ray Epps was part of, was working with the Feds.
00:25:05.000 That's, I can't believe, he said he wasn't.
00:25:09.000 Oh shit, oh okay, I had no idea that someone said no.
00:25:14.000 Or that kid who was with the Patriot Front, who was a Fed kid, they're like, right-wing conspiracists made this up and ruined his life and said he was a Fed, but he's not a Fed because he said he's not a Fed.
00:25:27.000 Or, Hunter Biden is accused of having cocaine.
00:25:30.000 There's no evidence to support that.
00:25:32.000 Yeah, we know there's no evidence and there never will be.
00:25:36.000 We're going to mention that in My Pet Biden.
00:25:38.000 They're saying, we can't find who did it.
00:25:40.000 That means that you give up, or more specifically, you won't give him up.
00:25:45.000 Which means it's Hunter Biden.
00:25:48.000 By the way, if I was controlling the White House, I'd pay a guy ten grand and say, you gotta take the fall for this Coke.
00:25:54.000 I can't have the President's son on the line.
00:25:58.000 Too risky.
00:26:00.000 Which brings us to... Remember, we're in the free portion of the show.
00:26:04.000 Don't worry.
00:26:05.000 When we go behind the paywall, we're gonna have lots of fun with racism, my pet Biden, oh my God, all kinds of mailbag stuff.
00:26:15.000 It's gonna be fun.
00:26:16.000 But...
00:26:17.000 Jump Medic is the first and only company that lets you customize your own first aid kit.
00:26:30.000 If you watched Get Off My Lawn over the last several months, you've seen this amazing bag, the Jump Medic Pro, which I will tell you about in a minute.
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00:26:40.000 It's not Build-a-Bear, and it's certainly not Build-a-Berg.
00:26:43.000 It's simply the world's first and finest option to customize your family's first aid needs with just a few clicks on your computer.
00:26:50.000 Go to JumpMedic.com, Bag Build, and select what you want from their convenient drop-down menu.
00:26:56.000 You can get one or more of their awesome Pro or Go bags, or you can skip the bags altogether and just stock up on first aid supplies to your heart's content.
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00:27:07.000 That must be a typo.
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00:27:16.000 JumpMedic has more bandages than I even ever knew existed.
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00:27:46.000 The Pro bag comes with pounds and pounds of high quality first aid equipment, so you can customize your bags or you can just get the Pro as is.
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00:28:13.000 In a couple of weeks, we'll let our faithful viewers know who sucks.
00:28:18.000 Once and for all.
00:28:19.000 I'm pretty sure it's Ryan.
00:28:20.000 I actually have an issue.
00:28:22.000 Tissue issue?
00:28:23.000 I have a nail.
00:28:26.000 One of my nails is
00:28:29.000 There's a chip in it, but it's going down.
00:28:32.000 And it's just growing.
00:28:34.000 And it's very painful.
00:28:35.000 I put Krazy Glue on it.
00:28:44.000 We've got hot packs, cold compressors.
00:28:48.000 We've got some kind of thing for cutting stuff.
00:28:52.000 We've got, what is this now?
00:28:55.000 Oh, I think that's an anal temperature doohickey.
00:28:58.000 Compressors.
00:28:59.000 Gauze.
00:29:01.000 What is this now?
00:29:03.000 That's a folded up... Oh, just a thing of tissues.
00:29:06.000 Hand sanitizer.
00:29:08.000 What is this now?
00:29:10.000 Ivy RID spray.
00:29:12.000 Oh, this is good for campers.
00:29:14.000 We gotta get this shit going.
00:29:17.000 Hold on a second, sorry.
00:29:18.000 Oh, there we go.
00:29:23.000 I'm not doing a very good job here, am I?
00:29:27.000 Well, that's okay.
00:29:28.000 You know, because it's like if you have like a bloody, bloody arm, you know?
00:29:33.000 It's this little pouch in the front.
00:29:34.000 And you're injured.
00:29:38.000 Oh, a thing for checking your heart rate.
00:29:40.000 That's handy.
00:29:42.000 And for ladies out there, too.
00:29:43.000 Think about how much makeup you could pack in there.
00:29:45.000 It could be like a really intense purse.
00:29:52.000 You know what I was putting on it before was crazy glue.
00:29:58.000 Chest seal vented, wow.
00:30:00.000 The amazing thing about this kit is it's got normal stuff for minor abrasions, but it also has stuff for if you have a giant bullet hole in your chest.
00:30:10.000 A sucking wound?
00:30:11.000 A sucking chest wound, good variety.
00:30:17.000 Uh, okay.
00:30:18.000 I guess we gotta get on with the show.
00:30:20.000 They don't have anything for if you have a hangnail that's cutting downwards, or at least not that I see immediately.
00:30:25.000 I wonder if they'll be mad at me for that.
00:30:30.000 We'll see.
00:30:32.000 Uh, back to the show.
00:30:35.000 I finally saw a reaction video that doesn't drive me insane with rage.
00:30:40.000 Rage.
00:30:41.000 Oh, here it is.
00:30:42.000 Sorry, I didn't notice that first.
00:30:44.000 They've got little medical tape.
00:30:46.000 So I'll get the scissors here.
00:30:48.000 Are you doing like a live fix me up?
00:30:55.000 I'm just going to tape over that so it doesn't have a chance to keep splitting.
00:31:01.000 You know what else might work if you ever have a nail that's cut the wrong way and it's starting to get worse?
00:31:06.000 I had it on my toe recently.
00:31:08.000 Clear nail polish.
00:31:12.000 That works.
00:31:14.000 Or colored nail polish and then that could be your little excuse for being funky.
00:31:17.000 Dude, Gino shows up at the bar yesterday and he has, uh, he has, uh, his pinky painted red because his girlfriend painted it on him.
00:31:28.000 And Anthony goes, you know, dude, I understand you do that because you're into a girl and she wants to do that and you're just like, whatever, honey.
00:31:34.000 Um, then you go and you take it off immediately after.
00:31:39.000 And I said, I bet your fucking toes are.
00:31:41.000 I bet your toes are painted too.
00:31:42.000 And he goes,
00:31:43.000 No?
00:31:43.000 Yes, there.
00:31:45.000 Anyway, sorry, off topic.
00:31:46.000 Back to work.
00:31:47.000 Well, one thing about Gino that I really... How did you do that, Shazam?
00:31:54.000 I just grabbed it real quick.
00:31:56.000 No, I had to look through the comments.
00:31:58.000 Oh.
00:32:00.000 Here's a reaction video that's not remotely annoying.
00:32:03.000 This is how you do it, folks.
00:32:04.000 Now, this is gonna be hard because she gets cut off, but she's talking about, I guess, her OnlyFans and what guys ask from her, and then she explains the weirdest request she's ever had.
00:32:15.000 I wanted me to make chocolate chip cookies, but with my poop baked into them.
00:32:32.000 Yeah, that was so good.
00:32:34.000 See, we don't like this and... I saw one the other day.
00:32:37.000 The dude was in the foreground and the video was behind him and he was like this the entire time.
00:32:42.000 Yeah.
00:32:44.000 He didn't do anything.
00:32:47.000 What?
00:32:48.000 What are you?
00:32:49.000 What?
00:32:51.000 Look, imagine you were her dad.
00:32:53.000 Hey Herdad, you fucked up.
00:32:56.000 You have failed.
00:32:58.000 Imagine you're, like, I wish my face was like a punchline like that.
00:33:01.000 Like obviously it looks retarded but it's not like I could just get away with like going... Like he's not even making an expression.
00:33:08.000 He's just going... Well he knows that too and he knows how to use it.
00:33:11.000 Right.
00:33:12.000 He's got legs!
00:33:15.000 He's got face!
00:33:16.000 He knows how to use it!
00:33:17.000 Um...
00:33:19.000 You know who else had that, obviously, is John Belushi.
00:33:22.000 In Animal House, he barely uses any... his eyebrows are half the movie, especially the cafeteria scene.
00:33:28.000 Wait, does she have terrible tits, too?
00:33:31.000 I haven't been able to figure out what's going on with those.
00:33:34.000 I think that's the name of the show.
00:33:36.000 Terrible Tits 2?
00:33:38.000 Yeah.
00:33:38.000 Oh my god, they're splashing over like the rocks of Gibraltar.
00:33:42.000 What is going on with those?
00:33:43.000 They look like dumplings or some sort of weird bags of milk, which I guess tits are.
00:33:50.000 What is dirty seed confessions?
00:33:53.000 Dirty street confessions.
00:33:54.000 Pull that up, Jamie.
00:33:57.000 Dirty street confessions.
00:33:58.000 Dirty seed.
00:33:59.000 I saw a street.
00:34:00.000 Oh.
00:34:01.000 I saw a seed.
00:34:06.000 In Quebecois, most of their swear words are French, but they're just catching up now, like this century, with
00:34:16.000 Good swear words where it's not against the church and it's like sexual.
00:34:21.000 But they're still weird about it.
00:34:22.000 Like, sus ma gran sal.
00:34:25.000 That means suck my dirty seed.
00:34:28.000 Meaning my dirty sperm.
00:34:30.000 It's like your grandmother's trying to swear.
00:34:32.000 They have the dumbest swears.
00:34:35.000 So for now it's one story but probably more.
00:34:38.000 I had a threesome with a guy and his mom and that was like his birth mother.
00:34:43.000 Wait, dude, I gotta say something when blacks Tell you their dirty sex secrets.
00:34:51.000 I'm my jaw Consistently hits the floor.
00:34:53.000 Yeah, it's always incestual or like it's always like when I was a I fucked my eight-year-old cousin Yeah, and you're like what?
00:35:05.000 What she gets
00:35:07.000 Hold on, hold on, hold on.
00:35:10.000 It was amazing.
00:35:13.000 When you say threesome, everybody interacted with each other.
00:35:16.000 She was sucking dick.
00:35:21.000 This should be called Black People Have an Issue.
00:35:25.000 My jaw rarely hits the floor.
00:35:28.000 I saw this one you know these the new thing with the kids where they have the phone as a microphone and then someone else is filming and the guy was he was going on his high school I wonder if I have that on my phone and he was getting people to confess the worst things they've ever done
00:35:44.000 And I was like, oh, someone farted on a Thursday.
00:35:47.000 This is going to be some rude business.
00:35:49.000 Every single one of them made my hair go white.
00:35:52.000 Oh, I found it.
00:35:53.000 I got to send you this.
00:35:55.000 One time I scalped tickets to the Oz musical.
00:36:00.000 I was mad at my moms, so I cut her tits off and I wore one of them as a hat for three days.
00:36:07.000 Then it started stinking so I stopped it.
00:36:11.000 I was mad at my mom so I killed her mom and then sent my mom her mom's vagina in a plastic bag that said fuck you.
00:36:20.000 Oh, I punched my brother and said punch buggy red.
00:36:23.000 But it was blue.
00:36:26.000 Like, like Larry was telling me the other day, he's like, yo, when I was young, I was like 10, and I'd be fucking all my mom's friends.
00:36:33.000 You know, I never told her that.
00:36:35.000 Because she knew, and she was in the room.
00:36:38.000 I never told her that because, like, she would have killed him.
00:36:41.000 I'm like, you were 10 years old, slaying pussy?
00:36:45.000 I go, Larry, you were raped.
00:36:47.000 Like, fuck you, I ain't raped.
00:36:49.000 You raped.
00:36:54.000 This is it.
00:36:55.000 Alright.
00:36:55.000 What's the nastiest thing you've ever done?
00:36:58.000 I was pissed at my mama so I mixed my period blood in her Kool-Aid and I watched her drink it.
00:37:03.000 What the fuck?
00:37:04.000 What?
00:37:06.000 I figured myself I was in a bed with my grandma.
00:37:10.000 Was she at least asleep?
00:37:12.000 I made her smell my fingers.
00:37:14.000 What's the weirdest thing you've ever done?
00:37:16.000 What?
00:37:17.000 What?
00:37:17.000 What?
00:37:17.000 What's the nastiest thing you've ever done?
00:37:23.000 I put handcuffs on my nigga and fucked him with a straight.
00:37:26.000 What's the weirdest thing you've ever done?
00:37:29.000 My hair was broke and I had my little brother beat my dick for me.
00:37:33.000 Dude.
00:37:33.000 No, that's gotta be lies.
00:37:34.000 That's gotta be lies.
00:37:35.000 No, it's not lies.
00:37:37.000 It's not lies.
00:37:38.000 We're experiencing culture shock right now.
00:37:40.000 What's the weirdest thing you've ever done?
00:37:42.000 I put my finger in my butt and then I licked it like it was Nutella.
00:37:47.000 I was babysitting this sixth grader and we ended up fucking.
00:37:53.000 You know everything your guys have said is a crime, right?
00:37:56.000 You know you're just listing felonies, right?
00:37:59.000 I want to find that guy's face that just... How do I find that face react?
00:38:04.000 We should get that.
00:38:06.000 I don't know.
00:38:06.000 That black guy's face just going... Once again, you're derailing the show by going back in time.
00:38:10.000 But is it worth getting that?
00:38:11.000 You want that?
00:38:12.000 No.
00:38:13.000 Don't... Didn't I just tell you not to derail the show by going back in time?
00:38:16.000 And then you derail the show by going back in time.
00:38:19.000 If you have time on your own, you can look something up, but do not interrupt me by going back in time.
00:38:26.000 Got it?
00:38:27.000 Okay.
00:38:28.000 Confirmed?
00:38:29.000 Yeah.
00:38:30.000 Alright, let's get into some racism.
00:38:34.000 No.
00:38:35.000 Yes.
00:38:36.000 Fine.
00:38:37.000 We added a new thing to it.
00:38:39.000 See if you notice.
00:38:42.000 I'm a black female.
00:38:44.000 What other difference, what else could I have done to piss you off?
00:38:48.000 A black woman?
00:38:50.000 This is really inconvenient.
00:38:51.000 That's crazy!
00:39:04.000 All right, so, all we hear about all day is racists, and America's racist, systemic racism, you're racist, I'm racist, your baby's racist.
00:39:12.000 I've seen that.
00:39:13.000 Is your baby racist was on the cover of Newsweek.
00:39:15.000 So, we've challenged ourselves many times to find something that isn't racist.
00:39:20.000 Gatorade, guns, cowboy hats, no matter what pops into your head, Google it and it will be racist.
00:39:27.000 And you go, but I've never met one of these people.
00:39:29.000 I keep hearing that they're everywhere, and you won't show me any.
00:39:33.000 And then someone finds one, and he becomes an internet celebrity.
00:39:37.000 And you go, okay, so this is the guy I've been hearing about in the New York Times, at BuzzFeed, Newsweek, Time, CNN, MSNBC.
00:39:49.000 This is who they're calling us.
00:39:51.000 And then I check him out and I'm like, you're the villain of America?
00:39:54.000 Like, what does Joe Biden say?
00:39:56.000 The number one threat to this country is white supremacy.
00:40:00.000 OK, well, can I check out the number one threat?
00:40:03.000 I'd like to see it, please.
00:40:04.000 All right.
00:40:05.000 Come on, man.
00:40:06.000 It's right here.
00:40:07.000 OK, let's check it out.
00:40:10.000 Black people apparently love to shoot other black people.
00:40:13.000 White people, wiggers, try and act black.
00:40:15.000 They look silly.
00:40:16.000 You've instantly taken care of one.
00:40:18.000 Yeah, I know them well.
00:40:19.000 I practice white flight.
00:40:20.000 If she were black, would you guys be together?
00:40:22.000 Oh, no.
00:40:22.000 So, would you prefer there be no black people?
00:40:25.000 I don't want to be around them.
00:40:26.000 One's love for diversity usually increases with their distance from it.
00:40:30.000 You think if you had a grandchild that was black, you would love him?
00:40:33.000 I wouldn't have a grandchild that was black.
00:40:34.000 What are your thoughts on Pride Month?
00:40:36.000 A mental illness month, you say?
00:40:38.000 I observed that mental illness was contagious.
00:40:41.000 If you're rounded enough, you then begin to ignore it, then accept and then embrace and become part of it.
00:40:47.000 You had a kid who was five years old and they said, Daddy, I'm a guy, but I think I'm a girl.
00:40:51.000 I think we would start working on correcting that issue.
00:40:51.000 What would you say?
00:40:54.000 I don't want an insane child.
00:40:55.000 Do you need an injection?
00:40:56.000 Hell no.
00:40:57.000 What are your thoughts on the people that did?
00:40:58.000 I didn't make no mistake.
00:41:00.000 I didn't force it on anyone.
00:41:02.000 And I didn't denigrate them for refusing to take the back.
00:41:06.000 So I ain't forgiving nothing.
00:41:09.000 How about y'all all commit suicide and make my day?
00:41:13.000 If you're afraid to say something, you don't have freedom of speech.
00:41:16.000 I'll gain my freedom by having nothing left to lose.
00:41:20.000 You don't see this in nature unless there's some sort of chemical contaminants.
00:41:24.000 Do you think the Chinese or the Russians fear our soldiers?
00:41:28.000 Forget G.I.
00:41:29.000 Jane, we got G.I.
00:41:30.000 ****.
00:41:30.000 You were president of the United States, how would this country look today?
00:41:33.000 Expected to be assassinated before my acceptance speech.
00:41:37.000 Quickest presidency you've ever seen!
00:41:41.000 That's the boogeyman?
00:41:43.000 That's the guy you've been telling me about?
00:41:45.000 That's the guy who is everything wrong with America?
00:41:49.000 He didn't even say he wants black people to leave.
00:41:52.000 He just doesn't want to be around them.
00:41:53.000 Okay.
00:41:55.000 By the way, most rich white liberals are very careful to choose rich white liberal areas and their kids go to schools that are blindingly white.
00:42:05.000 And it's true, the less black people there are in a community, the more they cherish the few that remain.
00:42:11.000 Like my neighbors who said, happy birthday Freddy in balloons, which is not cheap by the way, for their black FedEx delivery guy.
00:42:22.000 What?
00:42:23.000 At the old bar I used to go to in my all-white community of all-white liberals, disproportionately Jewish, there's an old black man who comes into the bar.
00:42:32.000 He drinks for free.
00:42:33.000 He comes in from Mount Vernon to drink for free.
00:42:36.000 Okay.
00:42:38.000 It's all perfectly legal.
00:42:41.000 Speaking of which, I'm about to go behind the paywall.
00:42:46.000 Without further to do, I'd like to bid adieu to you, you cheap ass who can't spend $10 a month.
00:42:53.000 I give a show a day, no matter what.
00:42:55.000 We're in Florida this weekend.
00:42:57.000 To go perform in front of 12 people in Boca Raton in Tampa.
00:43:02.000 The link's been below there, censored.tv slash tour.
00:43:06.000 You can still get tickets, believe it or not.
00:43:09.000 You will be safe.
00:43:10.000 Proud Boys will be there making sure you are safe.
00:43:13.000 It's going to be awesome.
00:43:14.000 It's totally uncensored comedy.
00:43:16.000 Anthony said the funniest thing last night.
00:43:17.000 We were talking to a friend and I go, yeah, we're leaving for Florida on Friday.
00:43:22.000 And he goes,
00:43:24.000 He goes, uh, oh you do stand-up comedy and he goes no, it's more offensive spoken word And I go fuck you just named the next tour
00:43:35.000 You just, you just christened that boat.
00:43:40.000 So that's going to be fun no matter who shows up.
00:43:42.000 But we'd really like if you live near Tampa on Saturday or Boca Raton on Sunday and you can see the exact, we've given up the location too.
00:43:50.000 But with this, the documentary crew that's following me, they're going to be there too.
00:43:53.000 And I thought if we bomb and no one's there, that's actually pretty interesting.
00:43:57.000 That's funny.
00:43:58.000 So it's win-win.
00:43:59.000 We either slay to a bunch of people or we slay three people.
00:44:04.000 Still slaying.
00:44:06.000 All right, Johnny Apple CBD.
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00:44:34.000 They help alleviate nerve and stress and a great recovery after a hard workout.
00:44:37.000 I've noticed when I take these at night, I don't wake up with the terrors.
00:44:42.000 I also notice, I'm talking with the gummies specifically, that I'll look back at my dreams and I went to the movies.
00:44:49.000 I went and saw a lot of movies last night and I didn't wake up all night.
00:44:55.000 If you're looking for something, oh and also the guys at my gym talk about the CBD topical.
00:44:59.000 I've never actually tried that.
00:45:00.000 I don't really have sore muscles.
00:45:01.000 I don't work hard enough to get sore muscles.
00:45:04.000 But a lot of the boxers at my gym will put on CBD for their aches and pains and they say it works great.
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00:46:08.000 God, it would be cool if that was your voice, huh?
00:46:11.000 Well, last night it was actually Michael Lincoln.
00:46:15.000 That's kind of different.
00:46:16.000 I'm an old, wise black man with a heart of gold.
00:46:19.000 You're a younger gay dude.
00:46:21.000 What's that guy?
00:46:22.000 Duncan?
00:46:23.000 Michael Duncan.
00:46:25.000 Yeah, Michael Clark Duncan.
00:46:27.000 He had that huge voice where he'd say, hey boy, if you bring that over here, I'll be much obliged.
00:46:33.000 Everyone wants that one, a friend like that.
00:46:36.000 I want, everyone wants like a blind friend.
00:46:38.000 Yeah, like a black friend cause it's like having a friend with a handicap.
00:46:42.000 An old black man friend.
00:46:43.000 Hey Gavin, how you doing?
00:46:45.000 Just some kind of handicap.
00:46:46.000 Pretty good, Darius.
00:46:49.000 Michael Clarke Duncan.
00:46:51.000 Jamaican friend.
00:46:52.000 Well, go on, Kevin.
00:46:53.000 You got the Babylon closing and yadda yadda.
00:46:55.000 Yeah, it's a tough day at work.
00:46:58.000 All these blood clot batty boys vexing me so, you know what I mean?
00:47:05.000 Nobody saw, except me.
00:47:07.000 Except me.
00:47:08.000 You see, some actors won't sit and run lines with you when they're off camera.
00:47:13.000 And you know who you are, because some of y'all right in here.
00:47:18.000 Some of y'all right in the air.
00:47:19.000 What's the lowest your voice can go?
00:47:21.000 That'd be funny if he called them out.
00:47:23.000 Assholes like Robert De Niro.
00:47:27.000 Christopher Guest.
00:47:30.000 Jamie Lee Curtis.
00:47:33.000 And lastly, the biggest cunt I ever met in my life, right there, Joe Pesci.
00:47:36.000 And also me.
00:47:37.000 I don't do that shit.
00:47:38.000 I don't do that shit?
00:47:39.000 Fuck that shit.
00:47:40.000 You think I got time for that shit?
00:47:43.000 Stop asking me to run lines, by the way, now that we're all together.
00:47:47.000 Alright, that's it for the free pre-show.
00:47:51.000 I'm going to stay with you, though, folks, because I love you.
00:47:53.000 But for all you freeloaders out there,
00:47:55.000 Oh wait!
00:47:56.000 One last thing.
00:47:57.000 Need a fashions.
00:47:58.000 Of course.
00:47:58.000 Who made this suit and all my suits.
00:48:00.000 Custom made.
00:48:01.000 Look at this beautiful cream interior.
00:48:03.000 Beautiful cream.
00:48:04.000 It's got your name there.
00:48:05.000 Great name.
00:48:06.000 Gavin McInnes.
00:48:07.000 Spelled right for a change.
00:48:09.000 Gorgeous.
00:48:10.000 Only people that can spell my name and pronounce it.
00:48:13.000 You want to see my suit?
00:48:15.000 Sure.
00:48:15.000 I'll send it to you while you keep boasting about these suits.
00:48:18.000 Pull it up on the fucking screen, genie arse.
00:48:20.000 I have to send it from my phone.
00:48:22.000 But yeah, I'm gonna.
00:48:24.000 But pull up their schedule, because I think they're going to be in Florida while we're in Florida.
00:48:29.000 They are, yes.
00:48:30.000 So what's the date today?
00:48:31.000 It's the 14th?
00:48:35.000 Scooch that over a little bit.
00:48:37.000 Actually, you should use a totally different thing.
00:48:40.000 Yeah, so they're in Atlanta right now.
00:48:44.000 If you're in Atlanta, go get them.
00:48:46.000 West Palm Beach this weekend, right until the 19th.
00:48:52.000 And then they move over to Miami.
00:48:54.000 That's their last date for, wait a minute, is there an overlap there?
00:49:00.000 They're in West Palm Beach till the, does that say the 18th?
00:49:05.000 Oh, the 16th, sorry.
00:49:06.000 And then the next day they're in Miami to finalize their tour.
00:49:10.000 Floridians, I highly recommend you get suited up and measured.
00:49:15.000 Then you just look at fabrics all day.
00:49:17.000 That's too dark, I can't see shizzit.
00:49:20.000 Why would you take a picture in a doorway?
00:49:22.000 It's where my mirror is.
00:49:24.000 Change the contrast or something, bro.
00:49:26.000 You look like a floating head.
00:49:29.000 We could see it here at home, but I'll brighten it up for you.
00:49:33.000 But it's beautiful.
00:49:33.000 It fits fantastic.
00:49:34.000 Like you said, it's like pajamas.
00:49:36.000 It's like PJs.
00:49:37.000 You don't change it when you get home.
00:49:40.000 And it's cool that your kids always see you in a suit, too.
00:49:42.000 You just feel like a better man.
00:49:43.000 So you had a vest made?
00:49:44.000 You queer?
00:49:45.000 Yeah.
00:49:46.000 You did?
00:49:46.000 Yeah, I've always wanted a vest.
00:49:48.000 I hate three-piece suits.
00:49:50.000 It feels great, and you know what?
00:49:51.000 You never feel fat.
00:49:52.000 It, like, sucks in whatever fat when you're sitting down.
00:49:54.000 That's what the great part about that is, really.
00:49:57.000 And it helps me support, like, sit up straight.
00:50:00.000 It helps your posture, you know?
00:50:02.000 It's beautiful.
00:50:03.000 And then the way the tie disappears.
00:50:05.000 Okay, shut up.
00:50:06.000 Get fired.
00:50:07.000 Get in trouble.
00:50:07.000 Be brave.
00:50:08.000 And never stop fighting.
00:50:09.000 And subscribers, stick around.
00:50:10.000 We're not leaving.