Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes - May 03, 2024


S5E87 - PEDANTIC SEMANTICS (Free Part)

Hosted by
Gavin McInnes
Mentioned
Fallout Ryan Johnny Pemberton Jimmy Pemberton Jimi Hendrix Jump Medic Purple Works Nutrition Katie Crutchfield Lamont Jenkins Baby Reindeer Joshua Tree Proud Boys Joe Biden Sprinkles Shogun Kaboom Trump Seuss Josie Boss and 2 more
S5E84 - BEAVIS, BUTTHEAD, AND BIDEN (Part 1) S5E90 - GANGRENOUS AIDS (FREE PART)

Episode Stats


Length

29 minutes

Words per minute

144.82

Word count

4,335

Sentence count

513

Harmful content

Misogyny

21

sentences flagged

Toxicity

133

sentences flagged

Hate speech

25

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

Gavin McInnes is back in New York. He talks about his favorite new band, Waxahachie, and what it means to be an Italian-American in the 21st century. He also talks about how he doesn t get the joke about being Irish-American, and why he doesn't get it at all. Gavin is a standup comedian, writer, podcaster, and podcaster. He's been around a long time and has a great sense of humor, but he's not a comedian, he's a podcaster and writer. And he's also a musician, so that's cool, right? Enjoy this episode of Get Off My Lawn! Get off my lawn! Subscribe to the podcast on iTunes and leave us a rating and review on Apple Podcasts and Podchaser. Subscribe on iTunes Learn more about your ad choices. If you like what you hear, please consider becoming a supporter of the podcast by rating and/or reviewing in iTunes. It helps spread the word to your friends and family about what's going on around the world. Thank you so much for listening to this podcast. The opinions expressed here are our own, and may not necessarily reflect those of our patrons' opinions and thoughts and opinions expressed in the show. We are not affiliated with any of the companies listed below. This podcast is not sponsored or sponsored by any of our parent companies, unless otherwise stated. Logo by Pond5, Inc. is a good or affiliated with this podcast or any other third-party, we make no money from this podcast, and we are a good friend of the show, we are not compensated for the use of this content. Thank you for your feedback is appreciated, not compensated in any other than your feedback or support is appreciated and appreciated by us in any way. You can reach out to me directly or not at any other person s and we appreciate the support is being helpful in any of your support is helpful in this podcast is appreciated. in any amount requested. - Thank you, thank you, so please reach out on this podcast and support us on this medium, so we can help us out there is appreciated in any further than that. -- Thank you and we really helps us out on the road trip, we appreciate it's value is being heard, not less than $1,000, etc., etc., and we re making this is not appreciated, etc.

Transcript

Transcripts from "Get Off My Lawn - Gavin McInnes" are sourced from the Knowledge Fight Interactive Search Tool. Explore them interactively here.
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
Hosts, guests, and mentioned names generated with spaCy (en_core_web_sm), reconciled against Wikidata.
00:00:04.000 Live from New York, it's Get Off My Lawn with Gavin McInnes!
00:00:20.000 We're good to go.
00:00:50.000 Let me turn off the A.C.
00:00:52.000 using my phone.
00:00:55.000 We had, what, like three days we didn't have to have heat or A.C.
00:01:00.000 That's New York City.
00:01:01.000 You can open your windows for three days a year. 0.99
00:01:05.000 That was some grandma rap, MAGUS themed, talking about fuck Joe Biden and stuff. 0.98
00:01:10.000 Is that kind of stuff good for us or bad for us? 1.00
00:01:13.000 Terrible, in my opinion.
00:01:15.000 Do we lose votes?
00:01:16.000 Does it help Trump?
00:01:18.000 I mean, it's viral.
00:01:20.000 But it's embarrassing.
00:01:22.000 But maybe it's funny.
00:01:24.000 I think the second lowest form of humor next to puns is, I'm a white guy and I'm rapping.
00:01:31.000 I live in the suburbs.
00:01:32.000 I'm a normal dude.
00:01:33.000 I'm not cool at all. 0.99
00:01:34.000 I'm a dumb white guy. 0.99
00:01:35.000 Hmm, I like to play golf and plant begonias. 1.00
00:01:40.000 You know that whole thing?
00:01:41.000 How many times have you seen that?
00:01:42.000 Done.
00:01:44.000 It's the dad rap, the suburban dad.
00:01:46.000 Oh, I am a grandma.
00:01:47.000 And even though I'm an old lady, I got bling.
00:01:50.000 And here's some black vernacular.
00:01:53.000 Verblacular.
00:01:55.000 It's amazing how much a woman's symbol is part of this montage.
00:01:59.000 Like, if I was like this, it wouldn't be so bad.
00:02:03.000 But it looks like a feminist talk show. 1.00
00:02:09.000 I feel bad when I play those novelty songs, because I like to show you cool music every day.
00:02:14.000 And only bad people don't like it.
00:02:18.000 So, what about my wife and my favorite new band, Waxahachie?
00:02:24.000 Bless you.
00:02:25.000 Do you know this?
00:02:26.000 No.
00:02:29.000 It's great if you're falling asleep drunk.
00:02:32.000 Put this in your headphones. 1.00
00:02:33.000 If I brought some shit like this to you... 1.00
00:02:51.000 The amount of gays you would call me would be more than one. 1.00
00:02:54.000 You don't know. 1.00
00:02:55.000 If you can't differentiate between this and your garbage, then you have terrible taste in music. 1.00
00:03:01.000 She's from Alabama. 0.99
00:03:02.000 I think the Waxahachie is a river down there.
00:03:04.000 I think she's on that right now.
00:03:09.000 Katie Crutchfield is her name.
00:03:11.000 She's from the South. 0.97
00:03:13.000 And another great band, similar to Black Angels, also from Texas, are Nightbeats.
00:03:20.000 Kind of have a Hendrix-y vibe, if Jimi Hendrix was in an indie band.
00:03:27.000 It is beautiful. 0.99
00:03:29.000 What is that, fucking... Joshua Tree? 1.00
00:03:35.000 Imagine if Jimi Hendrix was alive, but he was like one of those celebrities that say like bass shit all the time. 1.00
00:03:39.000 Like, I don't like Jews very much, man. 1.00
00:03:42.000 I don't trust them. 0.98
00:03:42.000 Yeah, the drag queen story hour, man. 0.98
00:03:45.000 I am with it, man. 1.00
00:03:48.000 The color pink is for fags. 0.99
00:03:52.000 Turn it up a bit. 0.99
00:03:55.000 Similar kind of sound to Black Angels. 0.86
00:04:10.000 Could be 60s psych.
00:04:13.000 Could be no better.
00:04:18.000 Cool pedals, too, when they do solos.
00:04:27.000 Jump ahead in the middle.
00:04:31.000 Night beats.
00:04:36.000 Yeah, just this big, long bridge thingamadoodle.
00:04:45.000 Okay, let's take a moment to say thank you to our sponsor, Purple Works Nutrition.
00:04:50.000 I'm on it right now.
00:04:52.000 Show the Purple Works background.
00:04:54.000 I have kind of an interesting story to tell you about.
00:04:57.000 So, I have a friend who's Irish, Irish-American.
00:05:02.000 There's a weird thing these days where Irish people are making fun of Irish-Americans and Italians are making fun of Italian-Americans.
00:05:09.000 When someone in New York says they're Italian, they're not trying to pretend anything about Italy.
00:05:14.000 They don't speak Italian, they never go there, ever.
00:05:16.000 They go to Florida for their vacation. 0.86
00:05:19.000 What it really means is, what kind of white person are you?
00:05:22.000 And when you say Irish, a whole picture of like, you didn't have steak for dinner, you didn't have good food as a young man, your dad is at the pub, like, I get, I can picture your culture.
00:05:33.000 And when you say Italian, it's like, don't drink as much, you don't have wine and stuff, you do your laundry at your parents' house.
00:05:39.000 You always had tons and tons of food around when you were a kid to munch on like just delicious food just on the table that wasn't even lunch or dinner and like all your snacks are homemade like that.
00:05:48.000 You have that trajectory.
00:05:51.000 You're not like, I'm actually from Italy.
00:05:53.000 So yeah, you don't get the joke. 0.61
00:05:55.000 What kind of white person are you? 0.95
00:05:58.000 Yeah, what kind of white person are you?
00:06:00.000 But anyway, this Irish dude, Irish American, he goes, I'm, this kind of contradicts what I just said, but he goes, I'm kind of getting into Irish culture, like from Ireland.
00:06:07.000 And I go, cool.
00:06:08.000 And he goes, I want to learn how to river dance.
00:06:11.000 And I go, I know a way you can just basically take a river dance pill.
00:06:16.000 And he goes, no, no, it takes years and years of practice to get good enough.
00:06:20.000 And I said, take Purpleworks Nutrition, an entire scoop, but I keep repeating, I don't do scoops.
00:06:25.000 I do like half a scoop.
00:06:27.000 But I said, do an entire scoop of Purpleworks and then just put on Irish music and just try it.
00:06:34.000 Guess what happened?
00:06:46.000 First time he's ever tried river dancing.
00:06:51.000 I think they put on the wrong music, but he worked through it anyway.
00:06:54.000 Yeah, he wasn't even supposed to be there, right?
00:06:56.000 Yeah.
00:06:57.000 No, he crashed the stage.
00:06:57.000 This was a ballet.
00:06:58.000 The number he has on him, he just printed out at home.
00:07:02.000 That's really resourceful.
00:07:04.000 Yeah.
00:07:05.000 Right now, the backstage people are freaking out. 0.99
00:07:07.000 What the fuck is going on? 0.99
00:07:08.000 Who is that guy? 1.00
00:07:09.000 And then the head guy is like, shh, shh, shh.
00:07:12.000 Just watch.
00:07:12.000 Don't worry, I'll take care of it.
00:07:13.000 No, no, no.
00:07:15.000 What?
00:07:17.000 Boss, he's not supposed to be there! 1.00
00:07:19.000 Shut up! 1.00
00:07:24.000 Anyway, I wouldn't lie to you. 0.99
00:07:26.000 Purpleworks also does coffee, delicious ground coffee.
00:07:31.000 We have it here at the office.
00:07:32.000 It's a wild ride.
00:07:35.000 And as I keep telling you, Purpleworks, it sets a timer.
00:07:38.000 And as soon as you do a scoop, your body starts going... And then the tingles start, and you better get to the gym.
00:07:46.000 It's like having to go pee.
00:07:51.000 What is that?
00:07:51.000 This.
00:07:53.000 Yes.
00:07:54.000 What is this?
00:07:56.000 How did they find that?
00:07:59.000 But what did you make this for?
00:08:00.000 Our workout shot?
00:08:08.000 Good stuff.
00:08:10.000 So sign up to get Purpleworks delivered to your home.
00:08:14.000 At least try one container.
00:08:16.000 I'm on like my tenth.
00:08:18.000 And what's the promo code?
00:08:19.000 Is it RyanSucks?
00:08:20.000 Is that a different one?
00:08:24.000 I don't think any of them should be RyanSucks.
00:08:27.000 Come on.
00:08:27.000 So I hope that answers that.
00:08:32.000 Hello, hello.
00:08:33.000 Go to the normal background for the ad.
00:08:37.000 No.
00:08:38.000 The ad background.
00:08:40.000 No.
00:08:42.000 Showing all your emails there, genius.
00:08:45.000 But what's the thing that's usually along the bottom?
00:08:48.000 Oh, here we go.
00:08:52.000 There we go.
00:08:52.000 The promo code is Gavin, 15% off.
00:08:56.000 We're going to cut you off soon, freeloaders.
00:08:57.000 This is the Friday show, the free show, but it's only free for the first half. 0.99
00:09:02.000 And then we screw you back into our little tunnel and we become as sexist, racist, and homophobic as we want to be. 0.96
00:09:10.000 A little less Islamophobic than we want to be because we're scared of getting killed by terrorists. 1.00
00:09:17.000 Um, someone sent in a video of Ryan- a sex tape of Ryan fucking a girl. 1.00
00:09:23.000 Is this true? 1.00
00:09:24.000 Well, I would consider that to be an impossibility.
00:09:27.000 It must have been from before you were married.
00:09:30.000 Well, yeah, yeah, but I also have never taped myself doing such a thing. 0.99
00:09:34.000 No, this is someone else capturing you fucking some chick on a- Whoops. 0.99
00:09:38.000 On a- what is the matter with you? 1.00
00:09:40.000 What the fuck is this? 1.00
00:09:41.000 Oh, okay. 1.00
00:09:42.000 I see what's going on.
00:09:43.000 What's going on?
00:09:44.000 I had last night's cop sittings.
00:09:47.000 She seems to have a foreign object lodged in her... V-A-G-I-N-A. 1.00
00:09:57.000 Vagina? 1.00
00:09:58.000 Come on, let's get this shit over with. 1.00
00:10:00.000 Where's the foreign object? 1.00
00:10:07.000 Is that you?
00:10:14.000 He's considered a foreign object.
00:10:17.000 He's a human being.
00:10:18.000 That is the joke.
00:10:19.000 But he's a human being with a real soul and humanity.
00:10:23.000 Terrible thing to say.
00:10:25.000 Someone sent this in as some advice for me.
00:10:27.000 I don't know what it is.
00:10:29.000 But I'm not gonna like it.
00:10:30.000 Um... Actually, oh that link... I don't think that works.
00:10:35.000 Oh well.
00:10:37.000 Skip it.
00:10:38.000 No, it's what they send in.
00:10:39.000 I want to see.
00:10:40.000 Well, I think it's wrong is the thing.
00:10:42.000 They probably sent the wrong thing.
00:10:44.000 Just let's see the clip, Ryan.
00:10:50.000 Oh, this is wild.
00:10:51.000 I didn't know you could go buy you a chin.
00:10:55.000 Yeah.
00:10:55.000 So y'all really out here getting whole chin implants?
00:10:59.000 I told you.
00:11:00.000 Oh, that's crazy.
00:11:02.000 That did it for him.
00:11:04.000 That did it for him.
00:11:05.000 Great job, guys.
00:11:06.000 I don't know what it's like not having no chin, but a chin really makes a difference.
00:11:12.000 When will you people learn?
00:11:14.000 He's hurt!
00:11:15.000 What's a chin?
00:11:17.000 I know what a jelly bean is, I don't know what a chin is.
00:11:22.000 In the end of that video he goes, but then you're gonna get in trouble when you have a kid and they don't have no chin.
00:11:28.000 The kid's gonna be like, hey pops where my chin at?
00:11:31.000 But that's true.
00:11:33.000 That's an actual thing I think about all the time.
00:11:37.000 There was a case in China where this guy married a pretty lady and she'd actually had tons of plastic surgery. 0.96
00:11:44.000 So when the daughter was born, she was ugly. 1.00
00:11:48.000 And he sued her.
00:11:50.000 And it's one of those Weekly World News kooky story things.
00:11:53.000 But, like, what is beauty?
00:11:56.000 Like, why are you attracted to beauty?
00:11:58.000 Because you want to, genetically, you want to make more of that.
00:12:01.000 So if you're, if you're, you want to marry someone more beautiful than you, so you'll have beautiful children and you'll continue this beautiful lineage. 1.00
00:12:08.000 It's fucking gay, but it's in our DNA. 1.00
00:12:12.000 That could be the title of today's show. 1.00
00:12:14.000 Feng and his daughter.
00:12:15.000 He's not exactly a looker himself, Captain Frog Face.
00:12:20.000 You don't think you participated in that?
00:12:22.000 I'm blaming you.
00:12:24.000 Is that the case I was just talking about?
00:12:25.000 Yeah.
00:12:26.000 Yeah. 0.98
00:12:26.000 Ugly wife lawsuit. 0.98
00:12:28.000 But I I know it sounds mental but there is and then like Jews in on Long Island every Jewish girl gets a nose job at her 18th birthday and you're like so I guess in that case with the no chin you have the kid with no chin and you go don't worry about it son just get a chin job and we'll just continue this our legacy of lies. 0.98
00:12:51.000 There's some new airline seats that have been invented very Friday's always got the important news This is the stupidest invention in the world, I don't immediately see a problem with that What plane is this 0.70
00:13:12.000 Have you been on a plane, dude? 0.94
00:13:16.000 If you stand up and you're not in the aisle, you have to go like this.
00:13:20.000 Where's all this extra five feet of headroom coming from?
00:13:25.000 We now have to redesign planes.
00:13:26.000 Here's another major problem. 0.99
00:13:28.000 Someone's ass is in your face. 1.00
00:13:30.000 Yeah. 1.00
00:13:31.000 That's not pleasant.
00:13:33.000 It just takes one hungover fatty, one Darryl Lamont Jenkins, with some Taco Bell in him, to destroy your life.
00:13:43.000 Look at that, I'm up, and I just don't like the... I would never take one of those lower seats.
00:13:48.000 Like, when I take the train to the city and from the city, I always make sure I'm in the seats facing the direction.
00:13:52.000 I'd rather stand than sit on a seat that's backwards.
00:13:55.000 Sitting in a seat below someone when you're literally below someone?
00:14:00.000 No way.
00:14:01.000 The fart thing is crazy.
00:14:02.000 Cause I had farts this morning from Taco Bell last night.
00:14:05.000 I mean, um, White Castle last night.
00:14:08.000 That smelt like an old friend's house.
00:14:11.000 Like, you know how some people's houses have like a smell to them?
00:14:14.000 Yeah, so you have friends with 80 year olds?
00:14:17.000 No.
00:14:17.000 Well, it was a trailer.
00:14:19.000 So it's like everybody lived on one floor and it's like everybody's odor ruminates.
00:14:23.000 So my farts smelt like an entire trailer household of people this morning. 1.00
00:14:28.000 So you wouldn't want to fly with me.
00:14:31.000 I have a Proud Boys announcement I have to make.
00:14:36.000 Where is that now?
00:14:37.000 I guess this is a place where you can air your grievances.
00:14:45.000 Okay, here it is.
00:14:47.000 This is the Pacific Northwest.
00:14:49.000 Proud Boys are having a split.
00:14:51.000 They've disavowed a chapter.
00:14:53.000 The Spokane chapter has been disavowed by the entire Pacific Northwest.
00:14:59.000 The collective vote of all P&W chapters voted to disavow the Spokane-Washington Proud Boys chapter for behavior unbecoming.
00:15:07.000 I don't know what you done, Spokane, but you done pissed off the brothers!
00:15:37.000 Is this official, like gavel official?
00:15:39.000 Yep, let me just get out the gavel here. 0.53
00:15:44.000 According to the Pacific Northwest Divisions of the Proud Boys, Spokane has been disavowed.
00:15:57.000 Um... Okay, got that.
00:15:59.000 Okay, this is kind of fun.
00:16:01.000 I, uh... 1.00
00:16:03.000 I started too many shows with my fucking bitch wife and she's such a fucking squaw who does get up early with the kids and drive them to school. 1.00
00:16:16.000 So my bedtime, I cannot get a wink before midnight. 1.00
00:16:20.000 And she needs her nine hours, all Indians do, so she's gotta go to bed at like 10, right? 1.00
00:16:29.000 She's up at seven, eight, nine, yeah.
00:16:33.000 And then sometimes she'll read in bed with my littlest boy and he's in bed at like 9.30, so sometimes she'll fall asleep at 9.30. 0.99
00:16:39.000 So I can't watch Shogun without the fucking bitch, without cheating, and then I can't watch The Gentleman 1.00
00:16:49.000 We managed to pull off that shitty gay rape show, Baby Reindeer, about being a weak man. 1.00
00:16:56.000 So now I'm like, I started Master of the Year, that's pretty good. 0.99
00:17:00.000 And then I just thought, at one point I was watching Person of Interest, because I had to watch something that no one else would want to see.
00:17:06.000 And it's just, it's action meets lifetime network.
00:17:10.000 And I'm not exaggerating.
00:17:11.000 It's the Tyler Perry of white male action movies, TV series.
00:17:16.000 But then I go, oh, what's this fallout here?
00:17:18.000 I clicked on it, and it's got that guy we have a crush on, the one who goes, you seen these spiders around?
00:17:25.000 I mean, I'm counting the legs there.
00:17:27.000 One leg, two leg, three leg.
00:17:29.000 Remember that guy?
00:17:30.000 No.
00:17:30.000 Yes, you do.
00:17:32.000 It's like five, and he looks in the eyes and goes, I'm not done.
00:17:36.000 Six leg, seven.
00:17:38.000 Eight legs? 1.00
00:17:38.000 How many legs does this fucking thing need? 1.00
00:17:41.000 Jimmy Pemberton, I think his name is. 0.99
00:17:44.000 You don't remember this, Ryan?
00:17:45.000 No. 1.00
00:17:46.000 What a garbage brain you have. 1.00
00:17:49.000 Jimmy Pemberton. 1.00
00:17:50.000 Johnny Pemberton.
00:17:53.000 How can you not remember that?
00:17:54.000 It's one of the funniest Sprinkles guys we had on. 0.98
00:17:59.000 Oh, you know what?
00:17:59.000 I recognize his face, but what does he do?
00:18:01.000 He's doing an Italian guy as a joke, and he's talking about how many legs spiders have.
00:18:06.000 Did we show him once?
00:18:07.000 Yes.
00:18:08.000 Okay.
00:18:08.000 But I'm guessing you went on a rabbit hole.
00:18:10.000 Will you stop wasting the show with not remembering things?
00:18:12.000 Like, this isn't here to help you remember things.
00:18:15.000 It's not a memory game.
00:18:15.000 You just hung up a meme not remembering him.
00:18:17.000 I don't know the words exactly.
00:18:22.000 Anyway, he's great. 0.99
00:18:23.000 And then he ends the spider bit where he goes, then a fucking snake comes in the room. 0.99
00:18:27.000 No legs. 1.00
00:18:42.000 So I go, I like to look at his stupid face. 1.00
00:18:45.000 And the fact that he was that funny is fun too. 1.00
00:18:48.000 So I go, okay, I'll tune in.
00:18:50.000 And it's 250 years after the apocalypse.
00:18:53.000 Some people, rich people live underground and they have a pretty reasonable system. 0.98
00:18:57.000 Then the outside is just total and utter fucking chaos. 0.98
00:19:00.000 Radioactive monsters and everyone's dying and there's tribes, blah, blah, blah. 0.97
00:19:05.000 And one of the things they have is a system just like the monarchy with knights and a squire.
00:19:11.000 And the knights are in these big robot costumes, and the squires run around with a bag of things, just like real knights and squires. 0.96
00:19:17.000 And of course, there's a whole pecking order where the knights treat the squires like shit, and then the squires will bully the new squires. 1.00
00:19:24.000 Normal, healthy stuff. 0.99
00:19:26.000 But the series is written by a chick.
00:19:29.000 So, I'm like, okay, again, what do we do with fiction as non-woke people?
00:19:34.000 You take it on the chin.
00:19:36.000 And you're like, all right, black female lead, whatever. 0.97
00:19:38.000 All right. 0.77
00:19:38.000 All right. 0.77
00:19:39.000 And some punches are just like, I'm out.
00:19:43.000 I got knocked out.
00:19:45.000 And there's a scene in it where I don't think I can handle it.
00:19:48.000 The rookies are picking on the new rookie.
00:19:51.000 Normal. 0.98
00:19:52.000 But he's black. 0.97
00:19:53.000 Oh, great. 0.93
00:19:55.000 So they have this black dude, it's based on a video game this show, and he's like getting kicked and stuff, and you're supposed to feel, I guess the white woman who wrote it does, you're supposed to feel more sympathy. 0.99
00:20:06.000 And be like, what the fuck? 0.98
00:20:09.000 250 years after today, and we're still in the 1950s. 0.99
00:20:12.000 I'm like, I don't care.
00:20:16.000 All the rookies get beat up.
00:20:17.000 And Johnny Pemberton, why aren't you showing footage of the show Fallout? 0.99
00:20:21.000 Why are you showing me a fucking black and white clip? 0.97
00:20:23.000 I have the rap report clip. 0.99
00:20:26.000 Okay.
00:20:30.000 So he's fighting a monster there. 1.00
00:20:32.000 And he's being a bitch, of course. 1.00
00:20:34.000 A Yagwai. 1.00
00:20:36.000 Turn it up.
00:20:39.000 What was that weird piano music you were playing?
00:20:41.000 It's a theme to Fallout.
00:20:45.000 I take it you've played this video game?
00:20:46.000 I love that game.
00:20:57.000 Hey, go jump forward a bit more. 0.96
00:20:59.000 So the black guy shoots the monster werewolf guy. 0.98
00:21:14.000 That's supposed to be abusive. 0.98
00:21:18.000 Okay, so he's upset.
00:21:21.000 He's bleeding.
00:21:45.000 Okay. 1.00
00:21:46.000 You know what you could do with a fucking toaster oven? 1.00
00:21:49.000 So jump ahead. 1.00
00:21:50.000 The guy's upset here, right? 1.00
00:21:52.000 And then he starts saying, you fucked up. 1.00
00:21:54.000 You're the shittiest cleric ever. 1.00
00:21:56.000 And he's saying, I think you take that so you don't get radiated. 0.98
00:22:02.000 And he goes, give me that. 1.00
00:22:03.000 And he's like, you fucked up. 1.00
00:22:04.000 You know what they do to assholes like you that fuck up? 1.00
00:22:06.000 They kill you. 1.00
00:22:07.000 You're dead when we get back. 1.00
00:22:10.000 They don't do their fucking job. 1.00
00:22:12.000 They string you up. 1.00
00:22:29.000 This maybe changes it a bit.
00:22:35.000 I kind of missed that part.
00:22:38.000 Where he said you're definitely going to die if we go back.
00:22:41.000 I thought he was just insulting him. 0.97
00:22:46.000 But anyway, he clearly kills him. 0.54
00:22:49.000 And it's a sympathetic thing. 0.68
00:22:52.000 In fact, it's kind of heroic.
00:22:56.000 Oh, you're definitely.
00:22:56.000 Yeah.
00:22:57.000 You're made to feel like he's making the right decision.
00:22:59.000 So you've seen this?
00:23:00.000 Yeah.
00:23:00.000 Yeah.
00:23:01.000 It's kind of noble. 0.99
00:23:03.000 And I'm like, this is a white woman writing a show where the black guy kills his evil white boss. 0.99
00:23:10.000 And it's applauded. 1.00
00:23:22.000 But they make him to be like an idiot. 1.00
00:23:24.000 So he has this moment here, but if you keep watching, he's like, like a goofy idiot. 1.00
00:23:31.000 And my friend who watched the entire series was like, yeah, it never gets better. 1.00
00:23:34.000 He's just always the worst.
00:23:39.000 And oh, the girl.
00:23:40.000 So the protagonist of this show, she's really weird looking half Asian chick with eyes that it looks good on a science fiction show because she looks like a bug from Dr. Seuss. 0.99
00:23:48.000 But in real life, I bet it's weird being around her.
00:23:51.000 Hi, Jen.
00:23:53.000 What are you looking at?
00:23:57.000 She sees him and it's just like, ah, just madly in love.
00:24:03.000 That's her. 0.88
00:24:05.000 Isn't that a weird face?
00:24:07.000 It's so cartoony. 1.00
00:24:10.000 Anyway, I don't know if I can get past this black guy killing his white boss and it being awesome and her being madly in love with the black murderer. 0.99
00:24:20.000 So you haven't watched the whole thing? 0.98
00:24:22.000 No, I think we're two episodes away from the end.
00:24:27.000 Okay, why are you being weird?
00:24:29.000 It's alright.
00:24:30.000 I have complex feelings about it because I've played the video game for like 12 years ago or something like that.
00:24:35.000 Is the black guy like a hero who kills his white boss in the video game? 0.74
00:24:39.000 No, those are not characters.
00:24:40.000 So the way that Fallout works is it takes place in different, like, each game takes place in different areas.
00:24:45.000 One of them is, like, post-apocalyptic DC.
00:24:48.000 One of them is, like, New Vegas.
00:24:50.000 And what do you do?
00:24:51.000 You just go around shooting people?
00:24:53.000 Yeah, and you loot, you collect stuff, you build weapons.
00:24:55.000 Like, ammo is very scarce and you have to, like, be careful with the radiation stuff.
00:24:59.000 It's a lot of, like,
00:25:01.000 It's very... I don't know.
00:25:02.000 I tried to pick it up again.
00:25:03.000 You know what you would need in a situation like that?
00:25:05.000 You'd need a jump medic, I would guess.
00:25:07.000 You'd need a jump medic hard shell case.
00:25:10.000 We've shown you the soft case.
00:25:12.000 But today in the mail, we have... Oh, check this out.
00:25:16.000 Narcan.
00:25:17.000 Everyone should have this in their home.
00:25:19.000 Oh yeah, my kids don't do drugs.
00:25:21.000 You don't know that, A. And B, what about your kid's friends?
00:25:25.000 What about some idiot comes over and someone runs up and says, Dad! 1.00
00:25:29.000 Dad! 1.00
00:25:30.000 Josie's freaking out! 1.00
00:25:32.000 And you go, oh fuck. 1.00
00:25:33.000 And then you can run over and save their life. 1.00
00:25:36.000 I think they're free at a lot of places, but they're on Amazon for nothing.
00:25:40.000 Anyway, we have just received the Jump Medic hard shell case.
00:25:45.000 I've been taking care of everything in my life this week.
00:25:49.000 Getting all the cars registered, insured, all the engine warning lights taken care of, all deep clean, super detailed.
00:25:56.000 All right, that's done.
00:25:57.000 The generator, it wasn't hooked up to the fuse box.
00:26:00.000 I got an electrician in, he put a big plug outside.
00:26:03.000 Now that's ready.
00:26:04.000 Now I got to fix the generator.
00:26:05.000 I'm going to charge that.
00:26:05.000 The battery's low.
00:26:07.000 The power's never gone out of my house, like, for decades before I lived there.
00:26:10.000 In our old place, a squirrel would go on the transformer and boom, we're out of power for two days.
00:26:16.000 But, uh, I don't think the power's ever gonna go out, but now I know I'm safe if it does.
00:26:21.000 And once you get all those ducks in a row, you can relax and you're a real man.
00:26:25.000 So one of the things you absolutely have to have is rations in case food runs out, water in case we lose water, a plan in case your basement floods, sump pump and all that, and a first aid kit.
00:26:36.000 A quality first aid kit.
00:26:41.000 Let's open this up, shall we?
00:26:43.000 I've never used one of these before.
00:26:45.000 You twist it, I guess?
00:26:46.000 That comes off easy enough.
00:26:49.000 And then it's got this valve that you can open and close and not worry about it getting wet.
00:26:57.000 Okay, so we open that up and then we go pop, pop.
00:27:02.000 Kaboom! 0.99
00:27:03.000 It's got an inventory list.
00:27:03.000 Look at that.
00:27:06.000 It's got the mini to-go bag for your little hikes when you're going to find water.
00:27:10.000 And then just all of your basics from arm splint, finger splint, trauma shears, transparent dressing, bleed stop, 4x4 gauze, 2x2 gauze.
00:27:19.000 Basically, this is everything that we gave Iran in that $7 million deal, right? 0.67
00:27:24.000 They said it's just going to be for medical emergencies.
00:27:28.000 Yeah, right.
00:27:30.000 So then you get that, and it's in your RV, or it's in your garage, or it's in your boat, and now that's handled.
00:27:37.000 You know what I mean?
00:27:39.000 The next thing you know, you're prepared for anything.
00:27:43.000 And when there's an issue, there's an emergency, oh my God, someone's cut, someone's ODing.
00:27:48.000 You go, I got it, I got it, I have a plan for that.
00:27:51.000 That's the thing, that's why I said you're a real man, if you have all these ducks in a row, because what do women do when they walk down the street, they go, 1.00
00:28:03.000 We have seven things going at once.
00:28:05.000 Some of them I'm not proud of. 1.00
00:28:06.000 Some of them are like, I wonder what she'd be like to fuck. 1.00
00:28:08.000 Yeah, she'd probably do this. 1.00
00:28:09.000 If I was to fuck her, I'd probably do this and this, and then maybe make her wear little red socks, blah blah blah. 1.00
00:28:13.000 That's one trajectory going at all times. 1.00
00:28:15.000 And then there's the other one of, okay, if that guy attacks it, why is that guy walking so close to me?
00:28:20.000 There's no reason for that.
00:28:22.000 I'm gonna turn, see if he turns.
00:28:23.000 Okay, what's going on over here?
00:28:24.000 Oh, he turned the other way.
00:28:25.000 Okay, he's not following me.
00:28:26.000 What about this guy?
00:28:27.000 Could I take that guy?
00:28:28.000 What if someone started shooting right now?
00:28:31.000 I guess I could go under that.
00:28:32.000 We have that going.
00:28:34.000 So, the ducks are there.
00:28:35.000 All I'm saying is, get them in a row with JumpMedic.com.
00:28:39.000 Promo code, best promo code we've ever had on the show, RyanSucks.
00:28:43.000 And that gets you 10% off.
00:28:49.000 And that's it.
00:28:51.000 For the freeloaders, we gotta get back to the fun stuff where we can speak uncensored.
00:28:57.000 And yeah, some of these jokes can get a little raunchy.
00:29:01.000 Some of them can have rape in the words. 0.99
00:29:03.000 Some of them even include the n-word. 0.99
00:29:06.000 But that's the way things used to be before the woke-op-a-licks-piss-piss.
00:29:12.000 Apocalypse?
00:29:13.000 Woke-op-a-lip?
00:29:13.000 Woke-op?
00:29:14.000 Woke-apocalypse?
00:29:15.000 Watch this! 0.91
00:29:16.000 Nick...
00:29:20.000 Before the woke apocalypse, you could make offensive jokes, and that's the beauty of censored.tv, folks.
00:29:27.000 You have a hard day, you come home, you think, I'm insane.
00:29:30.000 The world's left me.
00:29:31.000 I'm the only person who is normal in the world.
00:29:34.000 Then, just like in Fallout, you get a signal on your reclaimed TV from 250 years ago, and there we are, saying the same things you're thinking, but funnier.
00:29:49.000 So until next week, freeloaders, get fired, get in trouble, be brave, and never stop fighting.