Brittlestar is insufferable
Episode Stats
Harmful content
Misogyny
10
sentences flagged
Toxicity
81
sentences flagged
Hate speech
49
sentences flagged
Summary
This week, the boys talk about the latest episode of Brittlestar, Canada Day, and the dumbest thing they've ever done. Also, the guys talk about KFC and the metric system and much more.
Transcript
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It's beer and it's cargo shorts and it's a sorry.
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I'm actually like losing testosterone and brain cells as we watch this.
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Brittle Star is the best boy and I bet his wife is very proud of him.
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Canada is a bunch of people who decided to live here as opposed to somewhere else.
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we're gonna react to brittle star oh even just saying it oh god have you guys do you guys know
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this person oh god no i might have to like break something or punch a wall to get through this i
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don't know if i can do this guys i'm gonna be i'm i'm gonna be on maid watch after this
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I'm going to want to call made immediately after watching this. It's going to be brutal.
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I'm going to be like, you know, it's not worth it anymore. Oh, why are you feeling this way?
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I watched a Brittle Star video the whole way through. No pausing. Yeah. Third, third person
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this week who got done in by Brittle Star. This is part of the made program. You know,
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part of the made program is you watch Brittle Star videos. There's depressed veterans. There's
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depressed like you know right wingers they have ptsd they're like you know they're living in
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poverty because they get no longer no longer get support from our uh from our institutions
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they're like hey maybe you should get made think about it they pass you like a pamphlet with a
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link qr code you scan it it's a brittle star playlist it's a brittle star playlist of his
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different videos you know what yeah let just just give me the shots let's just end it this
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brutal star guy it's uh it's been over all right let's get into this i might die of cringe anyway
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here we go so this is his thing explaining canada day to americans hey neighbor oh hi america what's
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with the decorations it's canada day we're having a little get together canada day yeah um kind of
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like july 4th for you guys yeah but we do july 4th because we got lots of stuff to celebrate
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i i hate i hate like knowing so many people watch this and just like eat it up because we got lots
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of stuff to celebrate we got eagles and freedom and kfc what do you have to celebrate did you
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just say what do we have to celebrate yeah universal health care so if you break your leg
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You can still afford a snack while you wait in the ER.
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I know it's supposed to be a joke, but even if you're like, yeah, the metric system.
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Like, what the fuck are we doing here, dude?
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like they actually actually has a doctor in fucking outfit in the background like this is
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well produced for real leg you can still afford a snack while you wait in the er the metric system
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but to be fair everybody else has that except that greens maternity leave because we think
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if a woman carries around another human for nine months she might need some time off poutine french
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fries again the food the poutine all right baby cheese curds if angels own food trucks they'd
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make poutine oh my god just let the indians invade just end it let the indians take over
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dude just fucking is this is this what we are now just you know what i'm just gonna start
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going to a Hindu temple. Fuck it. Fuck it, dude. If this is what Canadians are watching
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and enjoying, maybe I should just join Calistan. You know what I mean? Maybe I'll just join
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Calistan. This is fucking retarded, man. Bagged milk. It's more environmentally friendly.
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Plus, it feels like you're holding a cold, wet baby. So you and beer, actual beer, not
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yellow water, beer, and lots of it. Butter tarts. If you put sex and gold into a blender,
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you get a butter tart. Of course, hockey. We did it first, we still do it best. But
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American teams win the Stanley Cup. American teams, Canadian players. Oh, and to your KFC
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point, Colonel Sanders lived in Canada, so we made it even better by pronouncing it KFC.
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it's true he lived in canada from 1965 to 1980 yeah that is weird but it's true
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oh my god this guy has like 150 000 people who follow him on twitter like what
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that's fucking crazy man what pennies because they're stupid pocket weights
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y'all do have some stuff to celebrate i guess yeah sorry oh my god dude
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oh that is an interesting fact about uh colonel sanders and it makes me think about something i
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tweeted yet like you know why why did this entrepreneur who runs this fried chicken
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business why did he go to america you know was there more financial opportunities there was
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there more like uh more opportunities to enter enterprise um i posted this on my twitter the
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other day but um did you know that like one of the biggest or sorry i think it's like the biggest
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tiktok star in canada started started a candy company in or sorry in texas and it's like if
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you know anything about business and and entrepreneurship and taxes and Canada versus
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the US like you're going to you're going to start your company in Texas if you can like you probably
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would because you don't want to get repped repped raped by tax rates in Canada and like again very
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very kind of like slop talking point but like these these elbows up proud boomers proud of
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canada it's like what are we what are we we're being proud of poutine we're being proud of poutine
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we're being proud of like trivia about uh colonel sanders and hockey okay okay dude uh you are you
00:07:07.440
know you like these people have been mk ultra it you know this is this person has been mk ultra it
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and like it's it's funny to the other mk ultra patients you know because they've also been
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mind controlled and like yeah we we do have these material things that may then make us canadian
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isn't that so cool imagine a different version of this where it's like well we have an invasion
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of indians who are crashing on the streets who are crashing transport trucks and uh leaving trash
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all over the highways that's what we have in canada we have uh slipping safety standards
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on the road because of the indian invasion that's what we have you know i'm gonna i might
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go watch another older one because this guy's always triggered me and i just i just looked up
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times that i've like searched his name i think i call him a eunuch multiple times
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traitors ottawa let's see what this one's about welcome mps bienvenue maupati politicos
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to traitors ottawa there are 338 of you and you've been chosen to lead this great nation
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of canada but all is not well according to an nc cop report among the faithful
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prime minister trudeau knows who the traitors are but he's not telling green party leader
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Elizabeth May knows who the traitors are. She's to the kill about it. NDP leader Jugbeet
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Singh knows who the traitors are. And he's freaking out. Bloch-Pivicoise Blanchet knows
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too. But nobody cares. Conservative Party leader Pierre Polyev refuses to get security clearance.
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So he hasn't read it. So it's up to us, the public, to try and figure out before the next
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election who's a faithful and who's a traitor. Welcome to Traitors Ottawa.
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like how fucking tone deaf is that it's like it's like dude there there's like a crime for
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this called treason you know oh there's traitors who are like the parliament buildings who like
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don't serve our people they serve like other other groups what you know like it's it's this
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guy basically is humor for people who only consume cbc and it's just like the fodder is the cbc
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headline the fodder is like what the the like the mainstream liberal cbc said today and it's like
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making jokes about that man man that's crazy to think about um that one's probably really dumb
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is this any good being forced to choose a side yeah no you know i'm actually like losing testosterone
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in brain cells as we watch this this one is 40 okay this one is 43 000 and it's 30 seconds long
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what the this was so he made a bunch of videos during the pandemic and uh they were kind of like
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just ruthlessly shilling to get the vaccine basically jesus dude how many shots will we
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need to get question mark this has 43 000 likes i've just had my third shot a booster they call
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it how many more are they going to make us get don't know don't care because i like you probably
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understand there is a global pandemic and people much much smarter than you and me have decided
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this is the best plan of action to avoid lots more people dying or cluttering up hospital hallways
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you and i we're doing our part by getting one more little prick and not being one
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oh my god dude where's the view count where's the how many people saw this
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i said uh canadian eunuch culture is so interesting
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do you guys know what a eunuch is why can't i see how many views there are
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Probably a lot more videos like this that have not aged well, by the way.
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It's a global pandemic, so of course I get my position.
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shot don't you know that people are dying it's like the most like why is this why is this content
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even so popular this is just like uh hey guys did you see what the guy on tv said i agree with him
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because i'm not an idiot crazy i mean you know good for him he's making he's pumping it out
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he's pumping the content they want to tear down statues let's do this one let's do this one
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are you tired of people tearing down statues are you concerned that history is going to be erased
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do you yes you secretly want people to stop tearing down statues because you live with
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the mistaken belief that one day they'll make a statue of you
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wow zinger and then finally you'll get the respect you know you've always deserved but
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has constantly eluded you because you're kind of a dick oh my god dude this is like this is like
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reddit this is like reddit on steroids this is like super super reddit this is like reddit extreme
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this is like reddit squared it's like reddit meets uh i don't know like dad humor
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you know what it really sucks too like it's so it's so bad it's like but it's like not even
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so bad it's good it's just like painful don't worry the solution is here let's stop making
00:13:17.920
statues of actual people for public spaces that's right let's stop making statues of actual people
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and sticking them in parks and stuff statues are meant to show someone who is to be revered
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and or held in high regard sure statues are cool they just usually stand there looking stoic happy
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to be crapped on by birds towering over us except to say be more like me society has said i'm good
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in fact the truth is if you cast anything in bronze and put it on a pedestal people will
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assume whatever it is is very good a sandwich a fish anything and that's the problem with
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statues of actual people actual people are problematic people are a product okay i'm not
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gonna i'm not gonna put you guys through any more of this i i'm i feel bad i feel bad for
00:14:10.800
So he also, he also did like a whole song about getting vaccinated.
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And he got featured, he got featured in the died suddenly documentary.
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Reindeer's pulling hard on that big red sleigh.
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Okay, maybe this one, because I actually quote retweeted this one.
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Brittle Star captures the globalist takeover of Canadian consciousness so well in this piece.
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I don't think he realizes it also plays comedically in its portrayal of how sad and pathetic demoralized Canadians like himself have become.
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And then no more Brittle Star is for a couple of years.
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Okay, no more Brittle Star for a couple of years after this.
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Canada is, so the context is important usually.
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does this coincide with something, some news item?
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I commented three years ago, Canada is a nation of demoralized slaves.
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Dude, I've really been going, I got to say, I don't know if you guys have noticed,
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I've really been going through it since the convoy days.
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Just like losing faith in our institutions, losing faith in the conservative party,
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losing faith in like friends and family, everyone around me.
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it's like oh my god like i don't recognize this fucking place anymore um so i'm constantly just
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crashing out in the comment sections anyway let's see let's see what this guy has to say
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canada is big canada is coast to coast to coast canada is milk and bags but not everywhere
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canada is butter tarts nanaimo bars and poutine but rarely in the same meal you make that mistake
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once canada is beer canada is cargo shorts canada is hijabs canada is lumberjack plaid canada is
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turbans canada is saris canada is kilts can what the this is actually kind of perfect this actually
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truly is kind of perfect hey canada is everything so it's nothing dude canada is nothing
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it's it's every culture ever so it's just not it's just a bus stop with a bunch of different
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people canada is back decks long hikes and canoe rides and time by the lake canada is pickup trucks
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and country music canada is material thing canada is this material thing and it's like
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and it's a costume and it's a food and it and it's a date canada is electric vehicles and
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canada is really really big canada is reconciliation slower than maybe it should be
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Canada is hockey, and soccer, and baseball, and football, golf, lacrosse, curling, and more.
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Canada is Hollywood North, though we actually call Hollywood Canada South.
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Canada is straight, gay, trans, two-spirit, and everything else.
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canada is a bunch of people who decided to live here as opposed to somewhere else most
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i i feel like if you push enough like uh you know liberals or like civic nationalists
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so i mean uh what are what's a canadian canadians are like people who live here man
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what do you mean like if you press them hard enough after debating them for like you know
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five ten minutes and you're like you're just grilling them fuck off dude Canadians are people
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who like live here like they're people who are like here right now like that's what a Canadian
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is like if they're here duh that's what Canada is man it's like people who are like here
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with zero sense of irony like zero sense of self-awareness it's like okay so you just
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like it's nothing then this is just like a location that just doesn't really mean fucking
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anything it's it's just the it's the material things that just got here somehow it's completely
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devoid of like any meaning whatsoever it's it's and again you know what i've said this many times
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before but you know i'm realizing politics more and more is about psychology it's not about
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ideology it's about psychology okay and if you psychologically look at someone like brittle star
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you know because you might think oh he's just a stupid globalist and it's like he's not he's not
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like a stupid globalist he's not a stupid like liberal it's like he is he is a man who grew up
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in canada and got browbeaten and and slowly but surely kind of you know indoctrinated in into this
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sort of like cbc liberal world view of thinking of things and more importantly in his personal life
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he gets totally whipped by his wife oh my god does he get bitch whipped and bitch slapped by
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his wife all day long up and down the stairs taking the garbage in taking the garbage out
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he probably does the dishes too probably he probably does everything but he's a good boy
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brittle star is a good boy brittle star is the best boy and i bet his wife is very proud of him
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so like his ideology just kind of comes from that like his his political worldview you know he's
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someone who has been groomed by the propaganda and indoctrination over the years and now he's
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in this situation where he is a uh you know testosterone levels have plummeted and you know
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he's in that kind of liberal sensibility can't stand up to your wife wife's always right yada
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yada yada and it's like hey i'm gonna be a good boy i can't have an opinion outside the cbc because
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my wife will say well that's bad and i need to be subservient to her by by any means necessary
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my um hey guys my masculinity is going to take a best seat because i'm a hecking good person
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i'm not going to disagree with my wife are you kidding what is that i'm going to be in the dog
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house you know like it's the psychology it's the psychology of these people and i gotta say
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ah it's pretty widespread it's pretty widespread i'm sure there's a lot of
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beer drinking conservatives who have boats and all that and i bet they're pussy whipped by their
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wives as well and i bet they're not as outspoken or don't want to hey i don't want to ruffle any
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feathers about the contentious political issue i better not say anything about the the indigenous
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people who think our entire history was just evil and bad i probably shouldn't say anything about
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um trans women being mentally ill men i better just keep my mouth shut because i just want to
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watch the game i just want to make it through the day i just want to i just want to not get
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berated tonight by my own blood by my own spouse so you know there is some sort of
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on unholy trinity there's some sort of evil trifecta what's the third thing though it's
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like you you have the feminine sensibility you have cbc propaganda oh you know what and then
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it's justin trudeau that's that's the trinity you have or or you know in insert progressive
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male progressive political figure here and it has to be male this is very important so you have the
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You know, you have the pussifying CBC propaganda, which kind of massages people into being like, hey, guys, like you got to be progressive.
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And if you're not a feminist, multicultural freak, then you're basically just a hateful asshole.
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So you better just kind of fall in line with all of this.
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So that that kind of constant drumbeat comes out of, you know, not just the CBC, but like all a lot of mainstream media comes in through Netflix in its own way as well.
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So there's that drumbeat of the propaganda and then there's the feminine sensibility, which is like, this is what's popular. This is what people like. This is what's in. This is how I'd be popular to be obsessed with feminism and Black Lives Matter and all these things. So I'm going to be that. And anybody else, my husband, you better fall in line because we need to be popular and cool.
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okay so there's that element and then there's then there's the thing that like drills at home
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which is like the dark the dark tall handsome liberal political figure you know the the male
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who takes the lead who the woman actually likes to fuck who actually wants to fuck right like
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there's like some sort of weird sort of like well i actually want to fuck trudeau and he's progressive
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And he's progressive in a real, like, strong way.
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Not like my husband, who I totally have no respect for anymore
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because his balls are in a jar on my mantelpiece.
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But Trudeau, yeah, that's what the future is.
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and then this poor soul this poor soul look at him this poor pulse pulse poor soul is just caught
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up in that he didn't stand a chance guys brittle star didn't stand a chance these pussy whipped
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husbands did not stand a chance between this cbc propaganda you know their wives being turned on
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by people like trudeau and they're by the way they're turned on by carny too okay do people
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not realize this people get dude we talked to somebody in aurelia there's an older woman
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really sweet she was actually kind of on board with uh you know returning the statue and
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everything she didn't like say that explicitly but you could tell that she was like into it
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and uh oh francis says orange shirt yeah he's got the orange i didn't even notice that
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he's got the orange shirt on too so he's a good boy what i tell you francis he's a good boy he's
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doing all the things he's saying all the things and just like this line like this is the good
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boy line this this is the i'm a good boy line give give me a give me a sticker canada is
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reconciliation slower than maybe it should be canada yeah slower than maybe it should be i
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made a statement hey honey hey honey did you see the statement i made in my video about canada
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yeah i said we should catch up in reconciliation pretty cool right anyway do i get a blowjob
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up tonight do i get a do i get an extra snuggle tonight do i get an extra like good boy point
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oh man but this poor guy didn't oh no i was talking about uh the woman in aurelia so older
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woman in aurelia we're chatting with her she's you know she seems kind of cool and kind of to
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segue away from talking about the statue she's like oh but last night i saw cbc in canada day
00:26:43.420
and it was so beautiful mark carney was there and like it was just so beautiful and positive
00:26:47.800
talking about all the different india she was gushing bro she was gushing it was like oh my
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god like you know like i'm like are you like she she was like getting turned on by just thinking
00:27:02.960
about carney on the cbc broadcast for canada day like liberal boomer women gosh for mark carney
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okay and hey we don't have to go into the details but you know he's handsome for his age he's got
00:27:20.580
that charisma he's chill he's relaxed he's relaxed okay he's relaxed and confident this is something
00:27:27.060
that this is something that polyev does not have at all dude polyev i feel like is constantly on
00:27:34.600
edge constantly feels like it might be the last day of his job or he's gonna get like someone's
00:27:40.240
going to show up and be like you're done polyev he's always like he's always like like i'm stressed
00:27:50.060
every time i see polyev i i get stressed out i'm i'm like i'm stressed out polyev looks stressed
00:27:57.440
what's he talking about some contrived nonsense yeah i see i'm stressed i'm stressful i don't
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know like he's delivering his lines and they're not landing because because he's fucking on edge
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anyway not the case with mark carney shout out to the carnsters out there he's relaxed he's chill
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okay and the boomer women gush over this big time and again it plays into you know the liberal
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programming and uh you know empowering the feminine the feminine character at home and then
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all the in the masculinity just disintegrates and then you end up with people like this you end up
00:28:36.980
with people like this these these these uh these husks husks of men who are literally listing off
00:28:44.280
things this is what canada is it's a beer and it's cargo shorts and it's a sorry and it's a kill
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and the back panel too that's what canada is it's like it's literally this scene in uh you know
00:29:02.220
clockwork orange or whatever where it's like we've given this guy too much propaganda he's been
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you know between being starved for sex from his wife and watching all the cbc programming to make
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him more of a pussy he's like we've lost him he's he's now a vegetable he's now a vegetable
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oh well let's make him make uh you know alternative media youtube videos which just
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parrot the mainstream narrative okay sure sounds good let's hear the end of it let's hear the end
00:30:06.980
I feel like I need to get a lobotomy after watching that.