jonnyrawton - FAFO w⧸Jonny and Sarah - v4hu499

00:00:00.000 One day we'll get it.

00:00:02.780 One day.

00:00:03.520 One day.

00:00:05.260 One day we'll get it.

00:00:07.260 We will get it.

00:00:08.140 But here we are.

00:00:08.920 We're good to go. 0.99

00:00:10.160 Another edition of Fuck Around Find Out. 0.98

00:00:12.680 What's up, everybody? 0.99

00:00:13.500 Johnny and Sarah.

00:00:14.260 We might get joined by Island Jason.

00:00:15.980 It is a possibility. 0.98

00:00:17.620 He's really good at fucking around and finding out. 0.99

00:00:19.820 So it would be... 1.00

00:00:20.860 He is.

00:00:21.540 Yeah.

00:00:21.860 Oh, my chair.

00:00:24.040 The thing about my office is that it's on a really...

00:00:27.440 The floor just...

00:00:30.000 In here.

00:00:30.700 So if it hits the wrong side on the wheels, then I just end up rolling away.

00:00:34.680 It's really great.

00:00:35.940 All right.

00:00:36.800 Yeah.

00:00:37.200 My chair stays still.

00:00:38.900 I like it.

00:00:39.960 It's a fantastic chair that way.

00:00:42.440 What happens if you live in a farmhouse?

00:00:46.020 Yeah, that's true.

00:00:47.500 That's true.

00:00:49.020 Let's see here. 1.00

00:00:49.880 What the fuck? 1.00

00:00:51.480 Bigot's Corner. 1.00

00:00:52.360 I know. 0.99

00:00:52.760 We're ain't fucking weak ass here. 0.99

00:00:54.100 Johnny Rotten. 0.99

00:00:54.740 Jump in here, dude.

00:00:55.640 I was waiting on Sarah.

00:00:57.340 Okay.

00:00:57.620 That was the...

00:00:58.880 That was the whole... 0.99

00:01:01.060 Fucking Alice in Chains. 0.99

00:01:03.280 Yeah. 1.00

00:01:03.880 Yeah. 1.00

00:01:04.140 Alice in Chains is fucking... 1.00

00:01:05.560 That's actually... 1.00

00:01:06.440 I am going to work on that. 0.99

00:01:07.860 We'll probably come into a song instead of just going fucking cold, cold fucking intro. 0.99

00:01:13.020 But we'll work that out. 0.99

00:01:15.400 We're still working on things.

00:01:18.100 As you see, we don't have a regular time slot. 0.98

00:01:20.040 We just decide to do shit when we feel like doing it. 0.99

00:01:24.120 Yeah. 1.00

00:01:24.360 We fuck around and then we find out. 1.00

00:01:26.300 And then... 1.00

00:01:27.220 Well, everybody else finds out.

00:01:28.860 See?

00:01:29.440 This is what happens. 1.00

00:01:30.460 People fuck around and then they don't seem to grasp the concept of when you fuck around, 1.00

00:01:36.100 you find out. 1.00

00:01:38.220 People seem to forget that as adults, there are repercussions for your fucking actions. 1.00

00:01:45.140 Yes. 1.00

00:01:46.140 Yes.

00:01:46.600 People are going to continue to move around.

00:01:48.620 Actually, I'm just going to be...

00:01:49.860 People are going to continue to move around and they're going to make those moves and act 0.99

00:01:56.440 like there's not going to be any repercussions for your fucking moves. 0.99

00:02:01.700 Well, you might be wrong. 0.99

00:02:04.440 And I feel like some of those people are going to have some real fucking rude awakenings at 0.96

00:02:08.360 some point when they realize that those actions are going to have repercussions. 0.96

00:02:13.540 That's how Birda Girl says, it's a pattern.

00:02:16.780 Whoa, whoa, whoa, it's a pattern.

00:02:20.300 Yeah.

00:02:20.800 Well, I mean, it is interesting though, right?

00:02:22.540 Like I think a lot of selfishness prevents people from seeing that they might find out 0.97

00:02:27.580 while they're fucking around. 0.99

00:02:29.780 Yeah. 0.99

00:02:30.000 I also find it interesting too that I think there's an interesting thing that happens

00:02:36.720 when adults sort of, we reach a point in our lives and a place in our adulthood where we

00:02:46.220 start to recognize the patterns of our adult relationships, right?

00:02:50.980 And how those are, what's the word?

00:02:56.620 Like how our childhood and the things that we've, the things that have happened and the

00:03:02.840 things that we've adopted and, you know, how we've dealt through our traumas and things

00:03:08.440 like that.

00:03:09.560 You come to a place in your adulthood where you, those things are, you can't not, you

00:03:18.000 can't not see them or feel them or whatever, because it doesn't matter what you're doing.

00:03:22.640 And those things are going to come up, right?

00:03:25.500 Yeah.

00:03:25.760 I mean, like I can use that in my own experience.

00:03:28.300 Like I ignored a lot for years and drinking was a way of assisting in that.

00:03:35.200 But I have no, like ever since I've quit drinking though, it's one of those situations

00:03:39.600 where yes, I've been able to look back and kind of realize where there's a lot of things

00:03:43.940 in the past that have truly affected where I've gone.

00:03:47.380 Um, and, and a lot of that too, is my own reactions to things, um, that, that's a real

00:03:53.180 hard pill to swallow, um, is when you start to realize that sometimes it is your reaction

00:03:59.060 to the situation that was a bigger problem.

00:04:03.560 Right.

00:04:04.080 Um, and that's, that, that, that one's probably that, that's a real ego busting, uh, realization.

00:04:11.320 Yeah.

00:04:11.780 Having to swallow your pride, especially when it comes to, it's not even necessarily pride,

00:04:15.700 but it's like recognizing that ego part of it where you're like, oh, so I did play a

00:04:22.040 significant part in this.

00:04:23.680 Right.

00:04:25.080 Yeah.

00:04:25.520 Um, I think that that's interesting too, that like you said, like there's a lot of people

00:04:35.560 who will use, um, things to try and not have to have those feelings.

00:04:42.080 Right.

00:04:42.740 So you do drugs, you drink, whatever it is so that you're trying to avoid having to deal

00:04:49.460 with the fields or any of the things that go along with, um, having those, um, feelings

00:04:57.320 come up as an adult.

00:04:59.040 Right.

00:05:00.660 And when you remove those, those things, you once again have to have those feelings.

00:05:06.440 Right.

00:05:06.920 And you don't have the option of having something to dumb them down or make you feel better,

00:05:15.020 quote unquote, you know?

00:05:16.100 So like you said, like you actually have to deal with those things.

00:05:18.740 So my question is as, as a grown male, and I'm using that term loosely, I guess, for

00:05:27.560 you, cause you're more, you're more like a foster player.

00:05:34.280 I'm like a toddler.

00:05:35.400 That's just really big and can, you know, pretty much.

00:05:40.820 But you know what?

00:05:41.280 It's funny though, because there's, and that's, this is, I mean, there's a reason why, you

00:05:48.000 know, that you, and it's not maybe one reason, but I feel like that's one of the reasons why

00:05:52.620 perhaps you're not currently in a, in a partnered relationship.

00:05:56.280 Right.

00:05:56.620 And it's because of things like you have unresolved trauma, right?

00:06:03.080 As we all do. 1.00

00:06:04.440 And it puts us in that where you have to recognize things and you're like, oh, fuck. 0.99

00:06:09.360 So how do you, so how do you recognize that as a, as a grown man? 0.99

00:06:19.240 Like I said, and what do you do looking at that to try and like, how are you trying to

00:06:25.580 navigate through that in, in searching for your, your next partner?

00:06:29.400 See, well, that's, that's, that is a really difficult question.

00:06:33.940 Okay.

00:06:35.300 I mean, looking back, the easier part is to look back and see the mistakes made the, I

00:06:45.440 guess also where I've played a part in, cause I mean, we were, we were kind of chatting earlier

00:06:51.260 and like, I've always put out that, that kind of pretending like being alone is fun and it's

00:06:58.120 cool, but the reality is, it's not right.

00:07:02.780 There's always that piece that's missing.

00:07:04.560 There's always that, that little bit where everything's a little bit more overwhelming 0.99

00:07:09.100 because you've got all that extra shit to do yourself. 0.98

00:07:13.000 And you, you don't have anybody to help take that load. 1.00

00:07:16.220 So that kind of sucks.

00:07:17.180 But, um, it's also that being able to look back and just kind of understand that the way 0.96

00:07:24.060 childhood went, the way, you know, the teenage years went, things like that, it's, it's been

00:07:31.220 this idea that I can't depend on anybody.

00:07:33.860 Right.

00:07:34.760 So rather than make the attempt to depend on somebody, I just put it all on myself and just

00:07:41.180 continue on.

00:07:42.240 Um, so, I mean, in terms of finding the next part that that's a tough one because I, I really,

00:07:46.880 I can't answer that, um, because that, that's a really tough one to answer.

00:07:51.740 Um, but it is, it's kind of at a stage right now where it's like, I'm realizing where I'm

00:07:57.660 putting up my own blocks and where I'm kind of sabotaging myself, I guess you could say.

00:08:03.400 Um, and is that because you're not, because you have, because you're just recognizing the

00:08:12.560 things that you have to deal with, or is it because you're having to deal with them now?

00:08:17.400 I think it's because I'm recognizing the dishonesty.

00:08:21.400 With yourself.

00:08:22.580 Yes.

00:08:23.260 Right.

00:08:23.540 Like I, I have been dishonest with myself throughout my entire life.

00:08:28.160 Um, feeling that I needed to be.

00:08:30.980 Was it dishonesty or was it because you felt like that was what you were supposed to be

00:08:36.300 doing because that's what people, people told you it was okay to be alone or it was, you

00:08:41.700 know, I think it's just straight up dishonesty.

00:08:45.000 And I think it's, it's a little bit of fear, um, because that, that's the one thing I learned

00:08:51.280 when quitting drinking, um, is that the base reason for it is fear.

00:09:00.960 Yeah.

00:09:01.680 Right.

00:09:02.780 Um, and the insane part about that is, is a lot of people would think that maybe it's fear

00:09:07.240 of failure.

00:09:07.780 Maybe it's fear of, you know, something like that.

00:09:10.320 But the reality is it's also fear of success. 0.95

00:09:12.580 Um, which sounds fucked up, but the reality is, is that yes, success is scary because 0.92

00:09:20.980 then you have to be consistent with it. 0.98

00:09:22.620 You have to keep it up.

00:09:24.380 And you know what I mean?

00:09:25.540 Like I remember being, uh, I was in an AA meeting at one point actually, and somebody had

00:09:30.560 mentioned this and this is where I kind of came to that realization.

00:09:33.300 Um, but he had mentioned something about an internal job posting, um, and that he had

00:09:39.340 applied for it, but then he started worrying about whether or not he would get it.

00:09:42.580 That job, because then it became, can I do that job?

00:09:47.220 And you get comfortable in this one spot where, you know, nothing is really expected of you

00:09:54.180 and you can just coast along and you don't have to take any risk.

00:09:59.280 You don't have to take, you know what I mean?

00:10:01.480 Yeah.

00:10:01.740 Um, and the, the fear is, is what guides all of that.

00:10:04.840 It's almost like imposter syndrome.

00:10:09.700 Yeah, it is a little bit.

00:10:11.920 Yes.

00:10:12.480 You feel like you have to be something like the, the expectation is there and yeah.

00:10:19.380 Well, and, and part of that is too, is, is being male.

00:10:22.620 Um, part of that expectation is that we are strong, that we are, you know, we, we, we don't.

00:10:30.020 Um, the societal expectations put on men are, are specific.

00:10:34.300 Yes, they are.

00:10:35.140 They're very specific.

00:10:36.940 And it, it, it is, it is difficult in a way because it's like, you, you do feel like in

00:10:42.540 those down moments, you can't, you can't put that shield down.

00:10:46.440 Right.

00:10:47.240 Right.

00:10:47.460 You have to keep that up.

00:10:48.380 You can't allow anybody to see that because it's weakness.

00:10:50.980 It's whatever, um, vulnerability is not a fun position to be in.

00:10:55.900 Um, I, well, I don't think it's a fun position to be in for anybody.

00:10:59.660 Um, but I, I do feel that especially, uh, for men, it is, it is extremely difficult and

00:11:07.100 it's even more difficult to be so around other men.

00:11:11.860 So there's a.

00:11:18.380 Yeah, there's a strong push for men to be men because men have lost that, um, that expectation.

00:11:29.780 There's been a, you know, our society has shifted the expectations around men and what

00:11:34.660 they're, um, what they're, what they're supposed to be and how they're supposed to, like, what

00:11:42.180 their place is in society.

00:11:43.700 And I think that that has done exactly the mixed messaging.

00:11:47.940 It's just been, it's the damage is insane, but for, for, I think there's a, um, in our

00:11:57.540 community, there's a lot of like the age demographic is older, right?

00:12:01.840 There's a lot of older people in our, in our community.

00:12:05.380 Um, I, I'm not older, but I mean, they're not, there's not a lot of 20 year olds that.

00:12:09.820 Right, right.

00:12:11.280 You know, more coming, which is great.

00:12:13.680 But, um, I think it's interesting too, that you're seeing, or that we are seeing a lot

00:12:19.280 of, uh, a lot of men who are being forced to, to stand up because they haven't had to

00:12:26.500 in the past, you know, men are now expected to be men.

00:12:30.380 Like they didn't have to be before.

00:12:32.660 And I think it's, uh, I think it's great.

00:12:36.240 Like I, like I said, like I, I would love more men to be men, but in order for that to

00:12:44.780 happen, the women have to play a role as well. 1.00

00:12:47.880 And that's the problem, right?

00:12:49.480 Is that the women also are wildly confused about what their role was supposed to be. 0.99

00:12:55.240 Cause for the last, you know, 40 years or 50 years, there's been that huge push of, you 0.99

00:13:00.620 know, be independent, be a boss bitch and blah, blah, blah. 1.00

00:13:04.640 And it's taken that the traditional societal roles of men and women where, you know, you're, 0.98

00:13:13.700 when we grew up, it was, you know, you dreamed about meeting your husband and having a big

00:13:20.960 wedding and having a family and, you know, going to Sunday dinners at your parents' house

00:13:27.160 with your sisters and your cousins and your brothers and all the kids.

00:13:30.340 And, you know, those are the things that we did when we were little and that we, we, we

00:13:36.820 were raised to drink, like those were the things that we were aspiring towards as, you

00:13:41.980 know, children and as teenagers.

00:13:43.220 Right.

00:13:44.020 And then there was that weird push towards the opposite where it was be independent.

00:13:49.860 You know, you don't need a man and you don't need a woman and blah, blah, blah. 1.00

00:13:54.220 And then everything fell apart because that's not the, that's not the way it works.

00:14:01.480 We're not supposed to be like that.

00:14:03.540 Like we're supposed to be units.

00:14:05.780 We're supposed to be together.

00:14:07.840 Well, and a lot of this is like, there's definitely been an attack on the nuclear family 0.85

00:14:11.960 and it's been that way for quite some time and having been somebody that has come from 0.98

00:14:17.080 a family that was completely fucking broken. 0.97

00:14:20.320 Um, there was a, there was a video, one of the private video calls in the empire that 0.99

00:14:25.500 Jeremy did.

00:14:26.120 Uh, we were kind of talking about the roles of men and women and, and so on and so forth.

00:14:31.080 And I noted that for me, like I, I, cause Jeremy said something about those who have grown

00:14:37.780 up without either a father or a mother or something like that.

00:14:40.760 And I mean, I, I, I'm one who's basically grown up with neither.

00:14:44.280 Yeah.

00:14:45.320 Um, now, thankfully I did have my grandparents for a bit there.

00:14:48.660 Um, so I, I've always said that any bit of stableness or, or any, any goodness as I've,

00:14:56.580 I've said it, uh, that is inside of me has come from them.

00:14:59.660 Um, but the reality is, is that not having, uh, especially not having the mother, um, that

00:15:06.840 one was a tough one because I've come to this realization that without, without a good push

00:15:12.440 from a woman, it's very difficult to find motivation. 1.00

00:15:15.860 Right.

00:15:16.520 So for a kid who's gone through without that, that mother or, and father as well, because

00:15:22.880 I think that's also a large problem in men these days as well as those of us that did not 0.98

00:15:28.000 have that father and did not have anybody that actually showed us what the fuck being 0.99

00:15:31.700 a man was. 0.99

00:15:32.440 And we had to rely on our mothers for that. 0.71

00:15:34.060 Right.

00:15:34.640 Um, which, you know, no, no offense to some of the mothers out there, but they don't do 1.00

00:15:39.380 a very good job of teaching how to be a man, um, for obvious reasons.

00:15:43.060 Right.

00:15:43.440 And see, that's the thing, right?

00:15:44.720 Like, yeah, it's got so broken.

00:15:47.780 Oh, it is.

00:15:48.580 And, and it, and it's obviously been designed that way.

00:15:51.540 Um, because, and going back to the messaging as well, I mean, you see the messaging of women 0.91

00:15:56.620 are to be independent and then the messaging, the men is women are just going to try and

00:16:00.540 take your house.

00:16:02.360 So it's like this idea that it's like, they want us to be a part on all the issues.

00:16:08.400 They want us to be continuously butting.

00:16:11.220 And that's the worst because it's like, and then you find that like, again, the people

00:16:14.660 that are, who are our age, right.

00:16:17.240 Who are not, that's not who we are.

00:16:20.180 That's not how we are.

00:16:21.260 And yet we're put into this box that that's what, like, that's how we operate.

00:16:27.600 Right.

00:16:28.320 And it's like, that's not fair.

00:16:34.400 It's, it's very frustrating.

00:16:37.800 Again, because it's like, we didn't like, we didn't ask for this.

00:16:43.420 We didn't do this.

00:16:44.800 And now we're stuck in this box where it's like, I'm, we aren't all of the other people.

00:16:53.140 Right.

00:16:53.660 And it's, again, like you said, like we're putting the expectation is, is that, you know, 1.00

00:16:58.540 women are going to take all your shit if you split up. 1.00

00:17:01.100 And the expectation for women is that men are going to fuck you over and cheat on you. 1.00

00:17:05.560 And you're going to be stuck in that relationship until you take all of their things and leave. 1.00

00:17:10.300 Yeah.

00:17:10.660 Um, yeah.

00:17:12.260 Well, and I think another part of it too, another part of it too, though.

00:17:16.960 And I, and I love, uh, the one saying there where it's like men, men have been told how

00:17:23.500 they're supposed to treat a woman and women have been told how to expect to be treated 1.00

00:17:28.320 by a man, but it doesn't go the other way.

00:17:31.220 Right.

00:17:31.500 Like women aren't told how to treat a man and men aren't told what to expect for treatment

00:17:37.180 from women.

00:17:38.420 Right.

00:17:38.860 See, I disagree with that because the way I was raised was opposite.

00:17:42.580 Like we knew what we were supposed to like, yeah, like I learned what I was supposed to

00:17:48.060 do to, yeah.

00:17:53.700 The expectations put like, it was clear, but I think that was also because of the modeling,

00:18:02.360 right?

00:18:02.560 Like, I mean, I saw my parents divorced, um, but I was also able to see what healthy family

00:18:10.240 dynamics looked like in, in other aspects of my life.

00:18:14.760 So I see, I see what the, like what my responsibility is as a female partner.

00:18:22.260 I know what my responsibility is as a female to my male partner.

00:18:26.160 Right.

00:18:26.680 Like I know that I'm supposed to be, um, you know, I'm supposed to be the female.

00:18:31.360 I'm supposed to be the, um, the support system for my husband or my partner.

00:18:36.860 You know, I'm supposed to make sure that he knows that he's a man.

00:18:42.760 You know, I, I don't understand how women have that mentality that emasculating their 1.00

00:18:47.560 partner is going to benefit them in any single way.

00:18:53.080 You know what I mean?

00:18:53.560 Like there's women that, that find that, that like man bashing or emasculating somebody is 1.00

00:18:58.400 going to raise them up or make them do something in their dynamic of their relationship when

00:19:03.080 it's not actually the truth, you know, if you, you know, try and, and address or heal

00:19:09.180 your partner, because again, your job as the female is to heal your partner's wounds. 0.95

00:19:14.580 Like my job would be to support my partner in whatever it is that he's going through.

00:19:19.400 Right.

00:19:20.020 Whatever that looks like.

00:19:21.440 So that's the female role. 1.00

00:19:25.220 And the man's role is to protect and provide, right?

00:19:30.100 Like those are the, the balance things that are supposed to occur.

00:19:34.560 See, and I think a lot of that too, like going back to when you said the, the, that whole boss 0.95

00:19:38.920 bitch attitude, I think that that's where the problem kind of comes in, in that regard 1.00

00:19:44.300 is where it's this idea that that's how women are a boss bitch is that they have to emasculate. 1.00

00:19:51.240 They have to, you know, whatever, which, which is certainly not true because I mean, I, I 0.97

00:19:56.880 can certainly point to, uh, certain, certain women that I've noticed that I would consider 0.98

00:20:02.660 a fucking boss bitch, but they certainly don't do any of those things. 1.00

00:20:06.680 Um, like there, there's, to me, there's a difference between a, a strong woman, um, which I mean, 1.00

00:20:17.140 may be intimidating to some, um, and some woman who's taken that, that kind of boss bitch 1.00

00:20:22.900 attitude as if she's just the shit and it doesn't matter what you do, but it's not necessarily. 0.99

00:20:28.640 And I have this conversation with people a lot. 0.99

00:20:33.040 I'm not intimidating.

00:20:36.040 People are intimidated.

00:20:38.160 There's a huge difference.

00:20:39.700 Sure.

00:20:40.140 People find me intimidating because I am all of those things.

00:20:45.840 I think, I feel like I am those things.

00:20:48.520 I, I think other people feel like I am most of those things.

00:20:51.320 Some people might disagree with me today. 0.99

00:20:53.360 However, I don't give a fuck. 0.94

00:20:54.640 Um, but I feel like if somebody can bring those things to the table, then the perception sometimes 0.98

00:21:04.740 or frequently is just that, that, you know, that I'm intimidating or that that person is

00:21:12.560 intimidating.

00:21:14.860 Do you know what I mean?

00:21:16.020 And then that's again, where you fall into that.

00:21:18.180 So because I'm able to support myself and do all the things that I need to do, because I don't,

00:21:24.960 just like you said at the beginning, I don't have anybody else that's going to do them for me.

00:21:27.920 I don't like, I don't depend on anybody because I don't have that luxury or that option,

00:21:32.940 however you want to say it. 0.98

00:21:34.120 So I had no choice, but to step into that boss bitch role, but that's not who I am. 1.00

00:21:39.500 Like I'm not in that. 0.98

00:21:40.800 I don't, I don't emulate that characteristic.

00:21:45.420 Would you agree?

00:21:46.440 No, I, I would certainly agree.

00:21:48.520 And like, this is what I mean by saying, um, like I, I definitely know women that I would 0.95

00:21:54.200 consider, I guess that kind of boss bitch, but it's not that mentality of the feminism 1.00

00:22:00.940 way of it. 0.99

00:22:01.800 Right. 0.99

00:22:02.140 I, I, I, when I use boss bitch, I mean like it, it is a strong woman that, you know, doesn't 1.00

00:22:08.400 take any shit, but at the end of the day, um, is going to be there and nurture and whatever. 0.99

00:22:14.720 Right. 1.00

00:22:15.160 Um, like, I don't know.

00:22:17.740 I, I typically like that kind of stronger personality.

00:22:21.920 Um, it's just something that I'm, I'm a little bit drawn to.

00:22:25.240 Um, so I don't, I don't get intimidated by that easily.

00:22:29.100 Um, I, I actually kind of like it.

00:22:31.240 Um, because I, I don't know, to me, I guess that just means that I know your spirit's not

00:22:35.360 going to be broken immediately.

00:22:36.360 Um, and I, I need that.

00:22:39.220 Right.

00:22:40.820 I think that giving, but being present and powerful in your relationship is also important.

00:22:48.020 Like as the female, you need to be able to like, like Homestead Travelway says, you need 1.00

00:22:52.980 to be able to nurture your husband.

00:22:54.580 You need to be able to nurture your partner when he comes home.

00:22:56.400 So you can do all of the things during the day that require you to be in a position of

00:23:02.320 power.

00:23:02.640 But the second I walk through the door of my house, I expect to be submissive.

00:23:08.820 I expect to be nurturing, submissive, and the female side of my relationship. 0.86

00:23:14.480 I expect to feel, you know, safe and, and appreciated and all of those things so that I can

00:23:20.380 be in the role that my natural role that I'm supposed to be in.

00:23:25.860 Right.

00:23:26.140 And I think that that's where it's intimidating, like you said, for, for people, because there's

00:23:36.140 men who are not capable of stepping up in the same way that a lot of women are able to

00:23:44.960 care for themselves.

00:23:45.980 And if a man can't step into the role that the female is already doing, then they don't,

00:23:52.820 they are intimidated.

00:23:55.520 100%. 0.99

00:23:56.140 And I think attitude is, but it all, but that sucks. 0.97

00:24:00.720 That sucks for the men and it sucks for the women because we've both been forced into 0.95

00:24:04.820 these positions and neither can come to the place. 0.98

00:24:10.080 You know what I mean?

00:24:10.660 Does that make sense?

00:24:11.620 No, it makes sense.

00:24:14.180 And I mean, I think a lot of, a lot of it is the, the attitudes that have been pushed

00:24:18.280 upon us. 0.99

00:24:19.980 Like whether it be, let's say beauty standards for women, like those are pretty fucking, 1.00

00:24:26.120 ridiculous. 1.00

00:24:26.580 If you ask me, right? 0.98

00:24:29.500 Like, and as a man, I will say that, like, there are a lot of things that I see that

00:24:34.760 just kind of make me shake my head.

00:24:37.340 Um, and it just, it's baffling, especially when it comes to the media beauty standards.

00:24:45.480 Cause it's like, that doesn't, that doesn't even resonate with me at all.

00:24:49.140 Um, I, you don't need a perfect 10. 0.55

00:24:52.880 You don't need, like, it's ridiculous really. 0.99

00:24:55.740 Um, the shit, and it's mostly just to sell shit by the way, but. 1.00

00:24:59.780 Yeah. 1.00

00:25:00.700 And it's not real.

00:25:02.000 And that's the thing.

00:25:02.880 Like I grew up in an age where things were starting to be edited in mainstream media and,

00:25:10.080 and, and what we had access to, because prior to that, I don't think there was any, like

00:25:17.160 the, the idea of being insecure in your own body and things like that.

00:25:25.140 I, it wasn't, you know, and then there was this big push that came out for, to have that,

00:25:33.340 like you said, like an, an unachievable ideal around the, the female archetype. 1.00

00:25:40.300 And I think it was, was it Gottman?

00:25:43.200 Was it Irving Gottman?

00:25:44.060 I think the sociologist that did a, a whole thing on, on like the sexual, sexualization

00:25:51.720 of, of, um, of females in media and things like that. 1.00

00:25:56.300 And it, it, it like shifted the perspective of what we were supposed to be and how we

00:26:04.460 were supposed to, you know, but also what you guys, what, what your expectations were.

00:26:09.300 And then, you know, and now the pictures are so, and the media and the things are so wildly

00:26:17.500 unrealistic and unachievable that it's, it's crazy.

00:26:21.020 I can't imagine being a child growing up in, in the era of, of all of these things that

00:26:26.960 are totally fake because it's like, you see pictures of, of women and they're like, and

00:26:31.960 they're in like, um, what's it called?

00:26:35.000 Like advertisements and stuff.

00:26:36.420 And it's like, where, where's your uterus? 0.98

00:26:40.980 Like, I get it that you're modeling, modeling underwear and bras and stuff, but I'm sorry.

00:26:46.860 Like, where are your internal organs?

00:26:49.380 Cause those have to be, um, in there somewhere, you know, like, what do you say?

00:26:58.320 Not to detract from this, but stare.

00:27:01.200 Yeah.

00:27:01.640 Right.

00:27:04.760 Listen, those aren't intimidating.

00:27:08.480 Those are fun.

00:27:10.500 I assure you, you know, fun bags.

00:27:13.480 Isn't that why they call them fun bags?

00:27:15.400 No, right. 1.00

00:27:15.760 No, but like beauty standards are fucking ridiculous though. 0.99

00:27:19.720 And they, they, they've done more than just try to sell products. 0.98

00:27:23.780 Um, like, like I, I, as a single dude, like I, I once in a while make the mistake of scrolling 0.97

00:27:31.320 through fucking Tinder or, or one of these, these dating apps. 0.93

00:27:35.360 And what's really infuriating is the fact that everybody's using a filter. 0.99

00:27:40.420 Everybody's everybody's everybody is also trying to put the best possible picture of themselves. 0.97

00:27:48.140 And it's like, no, honestly, to me, what makes more sense is here's, here's just a normal fucking 0.97

00:27:56.160 everyday shot of me. 0.99

00:27:57.560 Like, this is what you're going to fucking get used to. 0.99

00:28:00.020 Okay. 0.98

00:28:00.380 And this is what I can look like if I put some effort into it.

00:28:04.260 Yeah.

00:28:04.860 And, and, and this is where it's, because I, I've done this where it's like, okay, I've

00:28:10.680 talked to a girl online, you know, she looked okay.

00:28:15.520 Conversation goes well. 0.98

00:28:16.620 And then you show up and you realize that she fucking used like five filters on her face 1.00

00:28:21.640 and like, looks nothing like what was sent. 0.97

00:28:25.360 And it's like, first of all, that just starts everything off on dishonesty for one.

00:28:30.260 And second of all, it's like, my expectations were up here and you came in down here. 0.99

00:28:38.200 Um, that is a bad fucking plan. 0.98

00:28:41.140 Okay. 0.99

00:28:42.100 This is why I, yeah, I set the bar low, right?

00:28:46.620 Like, that's my plan.

00:28:48.600 I will set the bar low so that I can come in high.

00:28:52.360 Right.

00:28:53.800 That's.

00:28:54.620 It's a good strategy.

00:28:56.160 It is.

00:28:56.700 Right.

00:28:57.360 Like, I mean, it's pleasantly surprise you is what it is.

00:29:00.740 Yeah.

00:29:01.260 Yeah, totally.

00:29:02.320 Like, don't send flowers right away.

00:29:04.740 Just make sure that you, you know, do that six months.

00:29:09.320 That's another thing as well, actually. 0.99

00:29:12.400 Um, that whole like fucking, I guess you could call it love. 0.99

00:29:16.620 Bombing phase, right? 0.99

00:29:18.840 That, that idea where everybody pumps themselves up and, and does all these like incredibly sweet

00:29:25.680 things for each other in the first few months. 0.97

00:29:27.760 And then that just fucking dies and it just goes away. 0.98

00:29:31.840 Yeah. 0.99

00:29:32.380 And you know, what's funny.

00:29:35.980 I've had these conversations with people before because I'm the type of person where.

00:29:41.700 Like, I don't like using the term, um, like love language because I think that's a weird.

00:29:50.780 Um, but the way that I show, like the way I'm affectionate and men are weak to objectify women, which is reduced the natural course of relationships with women. 0.92

00:30:00.620 Women are happy to entertain. 1.00

00:30:02.100 Yeah, exactly. 0.96

00:30:03.780 Weak men are rampant right now.

00:30:07.200 And this is the reason why we're having this conversation.

00:30:09.800 Um, okay.

00:30:11.960 What was I saying now?

00:30:12.780 I lost it. 1.00

00:30:15.380 Damn it. 1.00

00:30:16.140 God damn it. 1.00

00:30:18.800 It's a good question. 0.99

00:30:19.840 Cause now I'm trying to think too.

00:30:21.460 See, no, I lost it. 1.00

00:30:23.720 Shit. 1.00

00:30:25.080 Where were we going? 1.00

00:30:26.280 I definitely shouldn't read the chat.

00:30:28.080 Way to go, PP.

00:30:29.240 Way to go, PP.

00:30:30.420 I shouldn't, I shouldn't.

00:30:31.260 That's twice now you've done that.

00:30:32.440 Um, Oh, the, like love bombing phase.

00:30:40.180 Oh yeah.

00:30:40.960 Right.

00:30:41.260 So I'm the type of person where I like to, um, like when I see something for somebody, like if I'm in a relationship, I'm, I like to leave like love notes for my partner.

00:30:52.960 I like to give cards, um, and like just little tokens of, you know, love.

00:31:02.240 Like, I don't know how else to put it really.

00:31:05.400 Um, and that's just the way that I am.

00:31:07.760 And the reason that I do that is because it makes me happy to know that the person that I'm with feels like the love that I'm, that I have for them, you know?

00:31:23.080 So the love bombing I get because I, I've definitely, I mean, I'm sure we've all been in a relationship where that has happened.

00:31:32.240 Um, I'm not a love bomb type of human.

00:31:36.100 Like I don't give it all at once.

00:31:38.360 That's just how I am all the time.

00:31:41.380 I have so much love to give that I just, that that's just who I am.

00:31:49.560 Um, like I'm not a, um, I'm not an overbearing, overwhelming person when I love somebody, but I definitely, I love with everything I have.

00:31:59.280 I am incredibly loyal and, and yeah.

00:32:01.620 I mean, if, if you're consistent, then it's obviously not, you wouldn't use the term, I guess, love bombing in that, in that sense, or even honeymoon phase, if you will.

00:32:10.560 Um, but I do find though, that in a lot of, it's funny how a lot of relationships start off that way.

00:32:17.700 Right.

00:32:18.060 And it's almost like it's because you think that you have to, and then it just sets up such a false, uh, such a false view.

00:32:28.580 Um, well, yeah, because if you're not going to be able to sustain that, then you're going to feel like, well, the person who was receiving the love is going to feel like you're not getting as much love really.

00:32:41.260 Right.

00:32:41.800 Which they are.

00:32:43.080 Right.

00:32:43.520 Well, and I think the other thing, at least on the male side of things, I think that, uh, there's a lot of things that maybe we would like to do, but feel like maybe it's a little gay or, you know, would get made fun of if it was, you know what I mean?

00:33:01.320 Like it's.

00:33:02.280 You would be surprised at the amount of men that have the perception that their affection towards their partner is going to be perceived as.

00:33:13.520 Is that me that froze or you?

00:33:23.980 One of us froze.

00:33:36.420 I think, I think that was you or did we both freeze?

00:33:39.960 I think Sarah's frozen.

00:33:44.340 There we go.

00:33:45.280 And we've lost Sarah.

00:33:47.800 All right.

00:33:50.580 Give it a minute and we'll see if she comes back. 1.00

00:33:53.320 Otherwise, I'm just going to sit here and make stupid jokes, I guess. 1.00

00:33:59.440 Yeah, exactly. 1.00

00:34:00.100 Peppermint Patsy.

00:34:01.120 Exactly.

00:34:02.720 I don't know what happened there.

00:34:04.640 I think Sarah's maybe got some tunnel juice or something.

00:34:06.700 Okay.

00:34:09.960 Breezy asking who's getting a knife hand.

00:34:12.700 Who knows?

00:34:17.080 Um.

00:34:18.740 Sarah.

00:34:19.580 Yeah, C-Sys got her.

00:34:20.840 There we go.

00:34:22.060 Let me find out what's going wrong with her. 1.00

00:34:26.220 Fix your interwebs, Sarah.

00:34:33.140 Anyway.

00:34:33.580 As we wait, though, I think a lot of it is to just dishonesty, right?

00:34:41.620 Nobody, nobody wants to be honest with each other or how they feel or even themselves.

00:34:48.020 That is definitely a problem.

00:34:50.960 And I think, I mean, we talk weak men.

00:34:53.840 It's also, it's just weak everybody, right? 1.00

00:34:55.940 Uh, there's a lot of shit that has been used to demoralize us and destabilize us. 0.98

00:35:03.560 And it's just definitely tough. 0.99

00:35:05.720 Where you at, Sarah?

00:35:07.880 There you are.

00:35:08.680 You're back.

00:35:09.560 Was I gone or were you gone?

00:35:10.960 You were gone.

00:35:13.040 Oh, I thought, I kept talking.

00:35:14.580 I thought you were frozen.

00:35:16.040 Yeah, no.

00:35:16.780 Oh, I don't know.

00:35:17.440 I'm pretty sure it was you, but.

00:35:20.720 It was one of us, that's for sure.

00:35:22.260 But it appears to be you, according to the chat.

00:35:25.580 Oh.

00:35:26.420 The Tunnel Jews guy, or Cesus, one of the two. 0.87

00:35:28.880 Oh, Cesus for sure.

00:35:30.120 Yeah, right. 1.00

00:35:30.600 Yeah, and he hates on my ass for sure today. 1.00

00:35:32.980 After last night's ladies night, 100%. 1.00

00:35:35.280 They fucking hate me right now. 1.00

00:35:38.360 They fucking hate me. 1.00

00:35:40.300 And they don't care. 1.00

00:35:43.620 Yeah, I was saying the thing about the weak men.

00:35:47.560 Like, weak men need to be shamed sometimes.

00:35:49.400 And I find it interesting because there's this whole thing where women are constantly shamed for their decisions outwardly. 1.00

00:36:00.240 You know, if they sleep with people, whatever. 0.68

00:36:02.480 And I'm not advocating slutting around.

00:36:05.700 Please don't misconstrue my statement. 0.94

00:36:08.100 However, I think that more men who, again, are displaying this weak, cowardly attitudes, I think they should be shamed.

00:36:24.460 Absolutely.

00:36:25.420 I think that it's the same.

00:36:27.020 Like, they should be shamed.

00:36:29.380 And they should, you know, do better.

00:36:32.360 Like, because that's the thing.

00:36:34.140 We're over here trying to do better, too.

00:36:36.520 So, like, you know.

00:36:39.620 I think, too, that it's part of the problem with hookup culture, too, right?

00:36:43.100 Like, the internet is really. 1.00

00:36:44.860 Yeah, fuck that. 0.99

00:36:45.620 I don't get that. 1.00

00:36:46.820 I don't get it.

00:36:47.580 I don't understand.

00:36:48.760 I just can't wrap my head around that. 1.00

00:36:50.940 Who the fuck? 1.00

00:36:51.840 Okay. 0.99

00:36:53.060 Guys, who actually wants to do this?

00:36:55.220 I don't understand.

00:36:56.060 Because, I mean, I don't understand Tinder and the whole online data.

00:36:58.720 I don't get it.

00:36:59.340 Who actually just wants to hook up with somebody? 1.00

00:37:01.480 Who, like, do you really just want to go fuck somebody and that's it? 0.99

00:37:04.500 Well, I can tell you what it is, at least. 0.99

00:37:07.920 Because what do you get out of that?

00:37:09.240 I'm just curious.

00:37:09.820 I can say from my own experience, anyway, that typically it was done out of a fear of the relationship, for one.

00:37:19.280 Um, just didn't want to, didn't want to commit, didn't want to risk, um, that being vulnerable, didn't want to risk being, I guess, left, I guess, is the, the best way to put that.

00:37:33.840 Um, hold on, hold on.

00:37:36.060 And then, on top of which, obviously, we understand that we all have physical needs and such.

00:37:43.960 Um, and I also think it comes from a lack of affection as well.

00:37:47.340 But the problem is, is that once you do it, right?

00:37:52.700 And this is, at least in my own experience, I can't speak for everybody on this one. 0.98

00:37:57.060 Um, but in my own experience, post-nut clarity is a bitch. 0.97

00:38:02.520 Because you realize that, yeah, sure, maybe you, maybe you figured out that selfish need. 0.96

00:38:09.420 Um, but in the end.

00:38:10.760 It's God slapping you in the face because you're not supposed to be doing that. 0.95

00:38:13.840 Yeah, it's, it's, you feel so fucking empty afterwards. 0.95

00:38:16.340 Exactly, it's why I'm going, this is why you're not supposed to do that.

00:38:20.300 Yeah, right.

00:38:21.360 So, if I, okay, correct me if I'm wrong and I'm, I'm wondering whether I heard you correctly.

00:38:27.040 So, you're telling me that there are people, men, however you want to put it, people, you're

00:38:32.700 speaking from yourself, um, who are not engaging in relationships in a, as a long-term expectation

00:38:42.420 out of fear of getting, um, like hurt, left, um, all of those things.

00:38:50.200 So, rather than, rather than take a chance on a relationship or be with somebody who you

00:38:57.580 think could have the potential to be a partner, you're sabotaging it before it can even get

00:39:02.780 started out of fear that it could go the wrong way.

00:39:05.680 Yeah, and there's an incredibly ironic thing here, um, as, as you're saying that, I'm, I'm

00:39:11.380 thinking about it, and the incredibly fucking ironic part of this is that we pretend it's 0.99

00:39:18.480 strength because we're like, fuck you, we don't need you, and, you know, this and that. 1.00

00:39:24.400 Oh, yeah, and it's the opposite. 1.00

00:39:25.560 But it is entirely the opposite. 0.99

00:39:27.840 It's because we are too chicken shit to put it on the line and potentially have it go 0.99

00:39:35.020 south. 0.99

00:39:38.100 Right?

00:39:38.920 That, that is, I mean, that's the honesty of it all.

00:39:41.780 So, essentially, it's fear and weakness.

00:39:48.140 Yeah, Alberta Girl has it right here. 1.00

00:39:50.980 Fear of the unknown is self-sabotage.

00:39:54.960 And it is true. 0.71

00:39:55.980 But life is unknown.

00:39:58.400 No, and.

00:39:59.000 So, self-sabotaging yourself for the fear of the unknown is never going to get you what

00:40:05.100 you actually want.

00:40:06.580 Exactly.

00:40:07.480 You cannot live in fear of anything like that.

00:40:10.700 And this is, this is the vicious circle.

00:40:13.040 You recognize that, right?

00:40:14.880 Oh, I absolutely do.

00:40:16.500 Right.

00:40:16.880 Like, that, that's the thing.

00:40:18.100 This is where I, I can come from my perspective and be able to be honest in that, in the sense

00:40:25.420 that, yes, like, because I've, I've done the whole, you know, I'm, I just, I just want

00:40:31.160 the friends with benefits thing.

00:40:32.460 Right.

00:40:32.820 And then you realize that, no, no, you actually don't.

00:40:35.940 Don't.

00:40:36.380 You want somebody to snuggle with and you want.

00:40:38.860 Yeah.

00:40:38.880 Right.

00:40:39.320 Friends with benefits is a, is a fabricated misconception that, that they wanted people 0.99

00:40:45.960 to think was going to work out because they were trying to sell fucking birth control 0.99

00:40:49.520 pills. 1.00

00:40:49.820 In my opinion, they were trying to push birth control. 0.99

00:40:52.280 So they were trying to push the idea that instant gratification and fucking around is 0.98

00:40:57.340 something that's going to, you know, work out well for everybody. 0.97

00:41:00.560 Right. 1.00

00:41:01.360 Fuck's sakes. 1.00

00:41:02.380 Right. 1.00

00:41:02.820 And, and it's like, and it's like going back to that idea of, you know, being vulnerable

00:41:08.260 or doing something nice for, for your partner, at least from the male perspective as being

00:41:12.740 gay. 0.93

00:41:12.940 Like, cause I can remember being in high school, right?

00:41:15.420 Like if, if a buddy was dating a girl and you know, he couldn't come and hang out with 1.00

00:41:20.440 us immediately, we were like, you're fucking whipped. 1.00

00:41:22.900 You little bitch. 1.00

00:41:24.180 Yeah. 1.00

00:41:24.480 Fuck you. 1.00

00:41:25.640 Right. 1.00

00:41:26.540 Um, and it's like guys that have been married for 35 fucking years though, isn't it? 0.99

00:41:30.660 Yeah. 0.99

00:41:30.920 Right. 1.00

00:41:31.740 Um, and it's like looking back on that though, it's realizing how stupid of a fucking statement 1.00

00:41:37.580 that is. 1.00

00:41:38.460 Yeah.

00:41:40.100 Right. 0.96

00:41:40.340 How dumb is it to make fun of somebody for loving someone else? 0.97

00:41:43.620 Exactly. 0.96

00:41:43.880 For showing them that they want to spend time with them, which is the, literally, it is

00:41:50.160 the biggest piece missing in so many relationships is time.

00:41:55.240 People don't understand the finality of time.

00:42:00.480 Yeah.

00:42:00.720 Uh, yes.

00:42:01.740 Yes.

00:42:02.600 Um, very much so.

00:42:04.300 Um, it, it, it, it's like people think that they have a lot of it.

00:42:11.360 You don't get it.

00:42:12.760 They don't understand.

00:42:14.000 It's a currency that gets spent and you cannot get a refund.

00:42:19.200 Right.

00:42:19.680 Um, and it, it's like, I look at it now, like I'm going to be 42 this year and I'm not,

00:42:25.240 I'm not going to lie. 0.98

00:42:25.980 I feel like I've wasted fucking 40 years. 0.99

00:42:29.380 Right. 0.99

00:42:30.160 Just fucking wasted it on whatever ideals I thought I was supposed to take at whatever, 0.97

00:42:36.540 you know, whatever self-defense mechanisms I created. 0.98

00:42:41.540 Um, things like that.

00:42:43.880 Right.

00:42:44.520 Yeah.

00:42:44.860 And also this idea too.

00:42:47.220 Um, cause like, I know that I've done relationships where I just did them because I thought that's

00:42:51.200 what I was supposed to do.

00:42:52.560 Right.

00:42:53.320 Like it had, it had nothing to do with whether or not I was compatible with that person or

00:42:58.440 whether or not that I love that person.

00:43:00.440 It was just, look, you need a dual income.

00:43:03.600 You need, you know, you live with somebody, you, you do these things.

00:43:07.820 This is just what's supposed to happen.

00:43:10.380 Um, and which is a terrible idea, by the way, don't do it.

00:43:13.920 Terrible. 0.99

00:43:15.060 It's fucking horrible. 1.00

00:43:16.680 If you need a roommate, find a roommate for fuck's sakes. 1.00

00:43:19.400 Yeah. 1.00

00:43:19.660 Right.

00:43:20.360 Don't pretend.

00:43:21.680 But it is, it's this, this idea that we're supposed to suppress whatever feelings and emotions

00:43:27.220 that we have because the fear of maybe they're going to be used against us or, you know,

00:43:33.100 maybe we'll get made fun of or, you know, things like that.

00:43:38.480 It's not time wasted.

00:43:39.920 It's a lesson learned.

00:43:42.640 That actually, you know what, that is, that's a much better perspective.

00:43:47.720 Um, it is, it is definitely a good perspective, but I also kind of look at it as, um, I, I 0.99

00:43:55.160 will say wasted just simply for the fact that to me, it kind of lights a fire under my ass 0.96

00:44:00.600 to realize that this next portion is not to be wasted, right? 0.98

00:44:07.660 This next portion is about honesty.

00:44:10.200 This next portion is about allowing myself to, to be vulnerable, to be honest with myself

00:44:18.400 and others.

00:44:22.140 Right. 0.80

00:44:22.700 And, and like, that's, that's another reason why I'm fucking extremely glad that I quit 0.90

00:44:26.560 drinking.

00:44:27.320 Um, because I never would have came to this without quitting drinking.

00:44:31.600 No, absolutely.

00:44:32.780 It's important to be able to have those reflections and actually deal and have the feelings, right?

00:44:41.040 And, and, and re the worst part about having to, um, work through your stuff is to have

00:44:49.680 to refill it.

00:44:50.600 Right.

00:44:51.200 And to have to go through those emotions again.

00:44:53.420 And the reason that you didn't deal with them before so that you could just put them

00:44:57.580 down and, and, you know, push them deep down inside.

00:45:00.920 And then when they come back up, you got to deal with them.

00:45:02.880 Right.

00:45:03.020 And it's a tough thing to do.

00:45:06.160 It really is.

00:45:07.040 Um, like there, there is, I don't think there's anything harder than turning in inward and,

00:45:14.260 you know, and I said this last night, actually, it was, we were on a Twitter space.

00:45:18.440 It was, uh, me, nerdy and fairy were co-hosting it.

00:45:22.520 And at one point the topic of drinking came up because there was somebody who wanted to speak

00:45:27.980 that we kind of knew was probably going to be drunk.

00:45:30.560 Um, and then that turned the conversation to there.

00:45:33.780 And if there's one thing that I'm extremely grateful for in quitting drinking and being

00:45:40.020 able to turn inward and look into myself is that destruction of my ego.

00:45:45.680 Because it's that what it does. 0.99

00:45:48.440 It fucking hurts for sure. 0.98

00:45:50.120 But also that destruction of my ego is what allows me to sit here today and be able to 1.00

00:45:56.300 tell you that, you know what, when I was drinking, yes, I was a piece of shit. 1.00

00:45:59.600 Okay. 1.00

00:46:00.040 I did some piece of shit things, um, that I am, I gratefully regret, um, that I am extremely 0.99

00:46:07.300 sorry for and that were so fucking out of character that they disgust me. 0.99

00:46:14.320 Um, and I have no problem admitting to these things. 0.78

00:46:18.300 I have no problem saying that I did them, especially because in doing so, if I can at least get one

00:46:25.480 other person maybe to quit drinking and to understand that, that, you know, and I'm only talking about

00:46:31.900 the people that drinking is a problem.

00:46:32.740 Drinking is a problem, obviously those of you that can socially drink, whatever, be, be your social drinker.

00:46:39.160 I might be a little jealous that I can't be, but I understand that I can't be and I won't be.

00:46:45.400 So, but for those of us where it is a problem and that it did dictate the way we lived and it dictated the way we felt, you know, it is definitely a good idea to fucking stop and then to try and look inward and take that, uh, that personal inventory.

00:47:02.660 If you will, you don't have a choice when you stop drinking, you have no choice, but to look inward because everything comes up all the things that you were not dealing with, they all come up and you have no choice, but to deal with every single one of them. 0.84

00:47:19.260 And then you have to sit there and you have to fucking, you have to sit in all of that. 0.99

00:47:24.960 And that's the hardest part about quitting because you literally have to sit there and accept all of the shit you did and all the people that you hurt. 1.00

00:47:36.240 Yep. And, and I can tell you right now, like in my, in my situation, personally, it's extremely difficult because I know like I could fucking go to the beer store at any time and none of you would know. 0.99

00:47:48.600 Yeah. Right. Like, I don't know, maybe, maybe you might see some fucking weird posts. Right. And that might give it away to some. 0.83

00:47:54.960 Um, but other than that, like if I, if I really wanted to, I could fucking keep it under wraps and, and I could go and drink. 0.65

00:48:01.620 But the thing would be is that the only person that I'm really lying to would be myself. 0.72

00:48:08.320 Right. And that's the only reason you're doing it.

00:48:11.020 Exactly. And, and this is why I have no problem saying that, you know what? Yeah, sure.

00:48:15.400 I started the journey of quitting drinking in 2019 and I have two slip ups.

00:48:21.060 Yep. Okay. There is twice now that I have said, fuck it. And I went and drank.

00:48:25.920 And another reason I admit that is because again, I, I just can't lie to myself because once 1.00

00:48:31.960 I start lying to myself, I'm fucked. Totally fucked. Right. Um, I, I, whether I'm lying to you guys 1.00

00:48:38.180 doesn't matter. Oh, you can't lie to yourself. Exactly. That, that's the one that right back

00:48:43.080 down that path. Exactly. And that, and I definitely do not want that path. Not that fucking all.

00:48:48.700 No. It's a, like just being numb is not, you know, it worked for a while there, I guess. Like I, 0.97

00:48:55.840 I did, uh, I can remember I fucking had some, some counseling there for a little bit. 0.91

00:49:01.700 Yeah. And I did find it interesting because she did say to me that while obviously I look back on 0.71

00:49:10.900 my drinking as, as a negative thing, the fact of the matter was that was my survival mechanism.

00:49:17.660 Yeah, absolutely. And it was the only way that I knew how, uh, to get past and to continue living,

00:49:25.520 um, without it, who knows what would have happened. Right. Right. But, and it was once that

00:49:32.540 perspective was given to me, it, it really changed a lot as well because I had never really considered

00:49:38.440 that. I always looked at it as my drinking was just a way to fucking avoid and, and, and be a coward 0.98

00:49:43.620 basically, which in some respect that is true. Sure. Um, but also it, it was a matter of, I was 0.98

00:49:52.440 not, I was not taught how to deal with my emotions. I was not taught how to cope with them. I was not

00:49:58.420 taught how to sit in them. So you didn't know how to survive otherwise. Exactly. And a lot of people

00:50:04.580 think that's why they do it. Yeah. Like I, I started this in like what fucking grade nine is when I really

00:50:10.360 started going hard with the booze. You know what you realize is that a lot of people continue to, 0.85

00:50:15.780 to stay in that cycle and that pattern because you're not alone. Right. Yeah. Breezy's right. It

00:50:25.000 was my cope. And, and, and that's, that's one thing I love about Breezy because me and her kind of get

00:50:30.540 that right. We, we can, we can have those discussions. I know that she knows exactly what I'm talking about

00:50:36.300 and that's, it's a difficult thing. Um, and that's why anybody that does quit and anybody that can

00:50:42.920 kind of stand up and talk about what they've gone through and, and all of that, like I, I give a

00:50:50.720 tremendous respect for it because it does take some courage. Oh, absolutely. Right. Like it, it ain't easy

00:50:56.860 to stand up and say, look, I was a piece of shit and I understand that I can take responsibility in 0.99

00:51:02.820 everything I've done. Yeah. Right. I, I understand that there's a lot of things that maybe weren't my 1.00

00:51:09.080 fault that happened to me, but I can say that the way that I reacted to them 100% is on me. Yeah.

00:51:19.260 Right. Um, whether I, whether I lashed out in anger, it doesn't matter if I had a right to be angry.

00:51:25.720 It's, it's, it's what you do with it. That is, is the fault of yourself. Yeah.

00:51:32.960 But yeah, it's one. Yeah. And, and, and, and this is why I do, I love the fact that I'm, I'm no

00:51:39.560 longer drinking because I do see all of this and I, I find it a little bit easier to be honest

00:51:43.700 how I feel and, you know, open up a bit. Cause I was always one that I wouldn't, nobody ever

00:51:51.000 fucking knew what was going on in my head. Never. 0.97

00:51:53.320 People didn't even know when I was doing any of the things that I was doing and that's

00:51:59.500 what made it. Nope. That's what makes it hard to stop sometimes because if people don't realize

00:52:13.500 and they don't see it, you don't have to stop. Right. Because if nobody could see what you're

00:52:22.080 doing, if you can hide it that well and nobody sees it, then it's not, it's not a negative

00:52:27.580 to anybody. Right.

00:52:29.360 And that's, that's the thing is I was always good at hiding it.

00:52:32.560 Yeah. Um, I hit it for fucking years. Nobody had any fucking idea. 0.99

00:52:36.600 Yeah. Right. Like I, I was always the one that nobody ever worried about because I'm always 0.99

00:52:40.880 the one cracking jokes. I'm always the one that's, that's laughing.

00:52:44.060 Like, Hey, are you okay? Yeah. Right. Like the, the, uh, what's that one saying is like,

00:52:49.740 check on your funny friends. Yeah. That's a real fucking thing because I'm going to tell

00:52:54.800 you right now, majority of your funny friends, there's a reason we're funny. And I know that 0.98

00:53:00.860 for me, the reason that I crack jokes, the reason that I try to get people laughing is because 0.64

00:53:06.800 I completely fucking understand what it means to feel like you don't want to laugh, that nothing 0.99

00:53:11.720 is funny, that everything is shit. So if in those moments where I can make people laugh, 0.99

00:53:19.300 that is what makes me feel good because I feel like I've done something good in that moment.

00:53:26.920 I feel like if I can do that, then no one's looking at me. If I'm making other people laugh,

00:53:35.940 then I'm taking, I'm taking the, yeah, for sure.

00:53:41.720 Yeah. And I see, I see East coast saying that's me. You know what? It's true though. Um, and, and I,

00:53:47.120 and I think this is also why I'm drawn to a lot of the, a lot of the funny folks is because I kind

00:53:52.400 of understand we have an unspoken bond there. It's the trial. Yeah. Like we don't even need to

00:53:58.020 discuss it. We just know, we know that we get each other. We know that this is why we're funny and

00:54:05.860 we just keep doing it. Right. Um, trying to remember what that, uh, that rock, that one

00:54:12.260 Robin Williams quote has always got me where he's like, I don't know how much value I have in this

00:54:17.060 life. Um, but if I at least made one other person happy, you know, and that, that quotes always hit

00:54:23.780 me, hit me pretty good. Um, because it has made me realize that for as much as my humor is a cope

00:54:29.860 and it helps me cope with my own shit. It also helps others cope too. Yeah, it's true. 0.94

00:54:41.560 It's definitely true. Sorry. Fuck yeah, Alberta girl. That, that, I like that one. What does Diagalon 0.99

00:54:48.720 even do? We do this. This, yeah. Well, and actually, you know what? That is an excellent question. What

00:54:55.480 does Diagalon do? And lately I have looked at this idea of the community building aspect,

00:55:03.140 right? And, and by what I mean by that is building each other up, dealing with each other and, you

00:55:09.980 know, whether that's offering an inbox when somebody's, you know, going through something

00:55:15.940 or, you know, whatever it is, like I've always said, mine, mine are open. Right. Um, if,

00:55:23.180 if anybody needs it, then yeah, whatever. I, I don't have a problem. Even if you just want to

00:55:28.280 fucking rant and you don't even want a response, you just want to rant and not have it public. 0.98

00:55:33.580 And just so everybody knows, I yell at Johnny all the time. Absolutely. Most of the time he just 1.00

00:55:38.260 responds with something stupid. So if you want to just rant and say dumb shit, send him a DM because 1.00

00:55:44.540 he'll legitimately just message you back with the dumbest shit ever. Yeah. Like I'll, I'll offer you to 1.00

00:55:49.080 show, show, show my boobs. Cause I know boobs make me happy. So if you want, I will send you my boobs 0.99

00:55:54.100 and you can smile. Right. You know, 0.99

00:55:59.900 it's, it's true though. The nice thing about this community is that there are, there are a lot of

00:56:07.060 people who, um, there's a lot of us who have, you know, same, sorry, similar stories. So, um,

00:56:19.080 it's nice to know that there are a lot of people out there, um, who can not only relate, but, um,

00:56:28.600 are willing to, to listen and to help. And I think that that's, I think that's really nice. I know

00:56:33.840 that there's definitely, yeah, I've done that with lots of people so far in this community. And I think

00:56:39.040 that it's wonderful that there's so many people out there that, that make the time. And again,

00:56:45.600 like I go back to the. Yeah. Who'd have, who'd have thought the stream would go this way, right?

00:56:57.480 Right. It is enjoyable. I will say that because there does need to be more,

00:57:05.120 more openness. I definitely don't need to be crying on camera. However,

00:57:10.800 this is a difficult conversation for me because just recently in the last month, I lost one of my

00:57:18.960 best friends to alcohol and that's been hard. So, um, I recognize that there's a lot of people out

00:57:30.520 there who, and there's, it's not just that, like, I'm not crying just because of that, but I wish that

00:57:40.780 more, uh, I wish that more people would reach out with me. Yes. Yes. And it's funny. Cause I mean,

00:57:49.480 I'm, I'm kind of bad at that too. Um, I am one that typically likes to just kind of keep to myself a

00:57:56.000 little bit, but I have noticed, I mean, there are a few people, um, that I have been able to

00:58:02.060 kind of open up a little more and let them in to understand kind of where I'm at. Right.

00:58:11.440 But that's also terrifying too, because it's also because we know that sometimes that can be,

00:58:18.440 that can be used as, as ammo against us, right?

00:58:22.480 It can worse than opening up to somebody than having, having them use that as munition back at

00:58:30.000 you. So sometimes that's scary too. And I get it. Well, and it is, and it, and it also goes back

00:58:36.520 to, and especially for those of us in the male side of things, um, it goes back to that idea that,

00:58:44.420 you know, you don't talk about it. You don't, you don't let others know that there might be a point

00:58:50.480 of weakness. And, and it's weird that it was drilled in that way, because again, I see the

00:58:57.460 irony in saying that that's weakness because to me, it takes a fuck of a lot more courage and strength 0.99

00:59:04.660 to look at somebody and say, look, this is what the fuck is in my head. Yeah. Right. Like, this is 0.99

00:59:11.520 what my head is saying to me. This is the thoughts that I have. And this is, you know, I am lacking

00:59:16.700 motivation. I am, you know, whatever it is that you're going through. Um, it is extremely

00:59:23.760 difficult. Yeah, totally. And there's a lot of people who are going through similar things,

00:59:35.440 right? That's, that's just it. Well, uncle, uncle Kenny serious with the whole get ahold of me

00:59:44.900 dropping his number. I'm not going to put it up on the screen necessarily, but

00:59:48.680 good on you though, uncle Kenny. I love that. I'm pretty sure most of our phone numbers are

00:59:57.640 available through CSIS or any hate. Yeah, probably. Um, but, and, and this is also why,

01:00:03.200 like, I do like to drop into, uh, like buddy check as an example in the empire every once

01:00:07.840 in a while, just kind of check on things there, see what's happening. Um, or if I notice, you

01:00:13.480 know, maybe, maybe somebody has got some weird posts or something, you know, just kind of

01:00:17.580 checking in or if somebody goes quiet as well. Um, that's, that's a big one. Right. And I,

01:00:24.540 I've done this myself where I do go through periods where maybe I kind of back away about it

01:00:31.340 and you don't see as much posting. And that usually is, is a sign that I'm kind of stuck

01:00:37.580 in my head. Um, that, you know, maybe things aren't so great. Um, it, it all, it all depends.

01:00:47.920 Heather's going to fight Jason. Oh, that should be good. Yeah. Maybe we should do it at the same 0.93

01:00:54.200 time as, as I take the belt from you. Oh God. It could be like a whole, a whole day of,

01:00:59.100 of ring matches. That'd be hilarious. Oh, it'd be so good. I'm going to smoke this.

01:01:05.960 I did come up with an idea of, I could do a match with, with Connor and have Breezy as the

01:01:10.600 special guest referee and I would get screwed over. I'd even have a bunch of you guys come 1.00

01:01:15.440 out and hit me with chairs or something. That'd be funny. 0.98

01:01:19.340 We could definitely get to make money for hitting you with chairs. 1.00

01:01:23.440 Ghostwriter hugs after your pushups. All right.

01:01:25.740 That's funny. Oh, and you've just missed a whole bunch of feels. That's, that's basically

01:01:33.820 what you're, what you're missing at the moment. That's all you missed. Just feels.

01:01:37.280 But I, and actually I'll be honest, this is one of the reasons why, like when you came up 0.94

01:01:43.240 with the idea that we would do a stream, I, I kind of liked it because I get to be a jackass 0.94

01:01:49.700 everywhere else. Not saying that I won't be here. So you're just going to be all feely

01:01:55.580 with me then? But no, but it's just, I know, I know that these conversations, I don't know

01:02:01.220 why, but they come very naturally when it, when it's us. So it, I don't know. I, I know

01:02:08.740 that I'm capable of having it. Exactly. This is why that's also true. Um, but it's just

01:02:16.220 one of those things, right? Like if I'm over with Tom, like half the time, I'm just being

01:02:20.760 a jackass. Same with, if I'm on with Chris or Island Jason, like once in a while, you

01:02:25.020 know, maybe there's a serious topic that we can broach and, and I can, I can get a little

01:02:29.540 serious, but typically I like to be the comedian. Um, and it is nice to every once in a while,

01:02:35.660 just have, have a genuine fucking conversation that actually is productive as well. Right? 0.98

01:02:44.000 Cause that's the other thing. Uh, we can sit here and shit talk all we want. Doesn't solve 1.00

01:02:47.880 much. Um, but actually having a real conversation about real shit. Um, even if it only helps one 0.99

01:02:56.420 person watching who gives a fuck, it was still productive. 0.98

01:02:59.220 It's, it's true. I feel like that was a almost productive conversation. Yeah. Someone 0.99

01:03:09.320 anyway. I mean, we learned uncle Kenny's number, so there's that.

01:03:18.160 I'm not putting my phone number in the chat just so everybody knows. Yeah. I mean, I I've

01:03:22.700 thought about it. Maybe, maybe I should start sending uncle Kenny some boob pics. Jesus.

01:03:32.060 Like, here you go. Uncle Kenny right here. I'm not saying anyone. Hey, I'll be your aunt

01:03:40.000 bunny. Jesus Christ. I can goonie goo goo. Uncle Kenny. You're ridiculous. Well, I am. And I've

01:03:52.680 figured I'd bring a little levity to it. You know, let's get a little laugh here.

01:03:56.480 Just a titch. Yeah. Yeah. But I have no more cries underneath my eyes. Perfect.

01:04:04.240 Peppermint says he has a pipe like yours. Oh yeah. My Gandalf pipe. Speaking of pipes,

01:04:10.160 I better get one in myself actually. It's my little Gandalf pipe. I love it.

01:04:14.260 It is pretty sweet pipe actually. Yeah. I just use it for smoking crystal or whatever

01:04:21.180 it's called. Not crystal meth. Just so we're clear. Like crystal. Yeah. Well, it's funny

01:04:27.680 because people call it different things. I call it hippie crack. Hippie crack. Yeah. But

01:04:31.440 if I say hippie crack, I feel like a lot of people don't know what hippie crack is. So

01:04:34.840 I just say crystal because I mean, that's what it is. It's the crystal trichomes. What I don't

01:04:38.980 understand is the fucking kids who call it Keef. What the fuck is that? Where did that word 1.00

01:04:42.840 even come from? It sounds like Keef. So that's why I can't say it. Exactly. It's stupid.

01:04:48.080 But anyway, it's just, it's a, yeah. 0.99

01:04:54.520 That's just, that's, this is another thing too. Like you see it in the chat here. Everybody

01:04:58.280 kind of saying like, if you need to reach out that, that is one of the things that I really

01:05:02.160 do actually love about this community is there is a number of people. Oh yeah, absolutely.

01:05:09.560 Absolutely. That are willing to sit down and have those conversations that are willing

01:05:13.600 to. Totally. I've had wonderful conversations with people who have reached out to me just

01:05:17.680 to have a, uh, an ear. Right. I think it's great.

01:05:25.160 East coast Canadian. When I was a kid, the homeless guys carried a brown paper bag. Now they yell

01:05:31.440 it trees. It's actually funny. Cause that reminds me when I was a kid, I was living

01:05:37.520 in St. Thomas and there was a guy walking down the road. He was actually fighting the

01:05:41.540 tree piece. That's good. Yeah. It was really interesting. Um, he would walk up to the tree.

01:05:47.840 He would then say something to the tree. He would then motion to the tree to bring it

01:05:52.660 and then start swinging. Okay. I don't make drugs like that anymore. Now they just see

01:06:03.240 like zombies and stuff. Yeah. And I mean, addiction is rampant, right? Yeah. But it's

01:06:10.880 not even, it's not addiction. Like it used to be like people used to have like, you know,

01:06:16.820 cocaine addictions and stuff where they just danced a lot and sweated. And now they're addicted

01:06:23.320 to like fentanyl and stuff where they're punched over like dead people on the road. And then

01:06:31.320 they die because they're, you know, hearts and everything else stop because that's what fentanyl

01:06:36.980 does is it stops your organs from functioning. It puts them in a stain. Yeah. Well, and you

01:06:44.580 look at the opiates as well. I mean, the opiates are another huge, massive problem because when

01:06:49.080 you take them long enough, it actually rewires your brain. Oh, fully aware. Yeah. Uh, pharma

01:06:56.660 is definitely the biggest other than, well, where we live, our biggest threat is migrants. But 1.00

01:07:05.640 other than that, I think pharma is the next big one for sure, because it doesn't matter where

01:07:14.560 you look or where, what you try to consume or however, well, you know, anything, it's all

01:07:24.260 pharma. It's all, it's all somehow, it all goes back to the same places, the same companies,

01:07:31.640 the same places. So they have their hands in everything, right? Everything from what is the

01:07:38.520 paint on your walls to the laundry soap, to the clothing, to the, um, the vitamins, the

01:07:47.140 food, the water, everything. Right. The school, what books you can read at the library. It doesn't

01:07:56.780 even matter. They have literally got their hands in every single aspect of human existence. And

01:08:03.220 yeah. Well, it's interesting too, because there, there was a long period of time there where I

01:08:10.400 didn't really get the idea that diet, for example, is something that affects mental health.

01:08:18.080 Cheese and crackers. And, and you look at what's pushed in terms of diets and, and things like that,

01:08:24.980 right. Yeah. And it's been convenience and more and more things of health value and, um, nutrition

01:08:34.740 removed from those things. And then all of the chemicals and the pharmaceuticals, all of those

01:08:42.720 things that are now manufactured are replacing said natural ingredients and flavorings and things like

01:08:49.760 that for the guys of convenience and better, um, like it's diet stuff or it's better for you, or it's

01:08:57.440 a cheaper, it's a cheaper alternative in production. And it's almost like they, they tried to do it in

01:09:03.300 such a way that people didn't notice, but a lot of people noticed. And now you can't deny the noticing

01:09:09.560 because so many people now have all of the things that didn't exist, the issues, health issues that

01:09:16.820 didn't exist 40 years ago or 50 years ago. Like it's insane. You can't deny it. What's up, Jason?

01:09:24.960 Powerful. Um, these, these fucking streams, man, they just, I don't know. You don't expect them to 0.99

01:09:32.780 come up like this. And then it's, it's, uh, you know, I lost my niece, I lost my niece. She was, uh,

01:09:41.540 17, she's a good little kid and, um, fuck man. It just hurts to think about. I, uh, yeah, she was at a 1.00

01:09:50.420 party with some friends and decided to do a rail and fucking overdose and died and found her dead in 0.98

01:09:56.400 the morning in a 17 year old, beautiful 17 year old girl. And, uh, yeah, it's, uh, it's so fucking 0.99

01:10:05.720 fragile, man. You know? Yeah. Like I'm, I'm currently in my current situation, right? Like 0.95

01:10:14.860 obviously I take care of my nephew. Um, and as much as I fucking hate to say it, the reality 0.93

01:10:22.940 is, is I am waiting any day now to get that call that says that his mother is no longer 0.83

01:10:31.100 with us because there's, I like that video that Jeremy had posted the other day where

01:10:38.640 talking about addiction. Like if, if somebody doesn't want the help, you're not going to

01:10:44.260 get it to them. No. And unfortunately my sister is one of those people that I've tried. I tried

01:10:52.660 to do a lot there. Actually, I did a lot that nobody else would. Like I was told heading into

01:10:56.860 this. I'll be honest. I had a conversation with my grandmother and my grandmother told

01:11:02.820 me just to leave this alone. That my, my sister was beyond anything and that it was not worth

01:11:10.300 it to, to enter into this and try. Um, now I don't want to say that I should have listened.

01:11:17.860 Um, because I don't believe that I believe that I still should have made the effort. Um, but

01:11:23.540 I can say that having made that effort, she was right. Um, my sister does not want the 0.98

01:11:29.520 help. She wants somebody to do it for her. And unfortunately this has led to a lot of

01:11:37.060 problems. Um, I tried to have her come and sit with like, come and visit her son whenever

01:11:42.920 she wanted. Right. And that was something that she wasn't getting before. I thought that

01:11:46.980 maybe, maybe that would be enough. Um, unfortunately it ended up getting to a point where I couldn't

01:11:54.200 tell if she was high or not. So I realized there was a massive conflict of interest there

01:12:00.220 because on one hand, I don't want to tell my sister she can't see her kid. But on the

01:12:04.180 other hand, I have a duty to the child to keep the child safe and protected from shit like 0.99

01:12:10.520 that. Um, so that's when I told her, okay, you gotta do, you gotta, you gotta call the access 0.98

01:12:15.640 center and do supervised access because I cannot be the one to determine whether or

01:12:21.100 not you're high, whether or not you're safe to be around the child because it's way too

01:12:25.180 much of a conflict. Um, and ever since then she just has not been around. Um, and I feel

01:12:30.760 that she's gone a lot further and a lot deeper and it's an unfortunate thing, but there's literally

01:12:39.200 nothing I can do about it until she gets to a point where she wants to do something about

01:12:43.940 it. I mean, you can't, I can't imagine what my mother went through, like watching me as

01:12:54.980 a, as a, you know, as a child, she used to tell me that, you know, the phone would ring

01:12:58.860 in the middle of the night and she was worried. And I don't, I don't know. I got lucky, man.

01:13:04.900 I don't know how I'm alive. Right. Like the shit that, I mean, I wouldn't probably be alive

01:13:10.280 if I was growing up in this stage because the way we behaved was just crazy. There's 1.00

01:13:15.780 no, I didn't think I was going to make it to 25, nevermind 45 or 48 now, but you know, 0.94

01:13:21.600 just didn't fucking think I was going to make it that far. And man, it's so, I don't know. 0.86

01:13:30.140 I don't think about my niece enough, you know, I've gone and it's one of those things I don't

01:13:34.140 like to think about, I guess, but I remember. Yeah. I just, I just, I have my son's 25 years

01:13:41.960 old and he's homeless and he's running around and I know he's, he told me the other day he

01:13:46.560 smokes crack. And I'm just like, fuck, what are you doing? Like fucking what's your plan? 1.00

01:13:50.960 Like you don't even have a bloody house. Oh, well, you know, I made so much money fishing 1.00

01:13:55.120 and I'm, I'll be fine. And it's like, no, you're not, you don't even have a home. Like

01:13:59.820 you can't stay at my house because I'm not going to allow you to fucking do drugs in my 1.00

01:14:02.880 house. I'm sorry. I can't do that here. I'm not going to let you like, you're not welcome 0.99

01:14:07.080 in my house when you're on drugs or after you've done them, which is probably every fucking 0.99

01:14:11.760 minute of the day. So, so painful. It's so fucking painful. And the worst part is the 0.99

01:14:18.320 helplessness, right? Because you, you want to, you want to go in there, you want to fucking 0.99

01:14:24.860 slap them so fucking hard and be like, what the fuck are you doing? But you know, that 1.00

01:14:31.120 doesn't help. He's over the other night and, and, and I've kind of left, lost it on him a

01:14:35.600 little bit. And I'm like, what the fuck? And I was giving him shit, you know, like you got 0.99

01:14:38.560 to figure something out. And he, cause the town that we live in is horrible for, for 0.99

01:14:43.280 these kinds of problems. I mean, it's, it's poverty every look. And I told him like, you

01:14:49.020 got to get out of this fucking town, like go to Alberta, get a job, you know, just go 0.99

01:14:52.320 work somewhere and, and, you know, work your way out of it. And he's like, oh, it doesn't 0.99

01:14:56.500 matter where I go. I seem to find it. I'm like, yeah, you will. Because it, the problem

01:15:00.520 isn't the geography. The problem is you. But I think if you had a job or you had some

01:15:05.800 sort of purpose rather than just walking around, hanging around with a bunch of 0.99

01:15:08.520 fucking skids, you know, like he comes to my house and I feel so bad for him. I 0.98

01:15:14.440 grabbed my wallet. I had 40 bucks in my wallet and I gave it to him. And I'm

01:15:17.160 like, don't fucking ask me for any more because this is it, man. Like go get a 0.99

01:15:21.640 fucking bus ticket. Get the fuck out of here, man. You're going to die. 1.00

01:15:25.740 And to, to wilds comment here, do I imagine the worst when I don't know where 0.95

01:15:29.480 she is? I never know where she is ever. I don't have a, like, I have no clue, no

01:15:37.200 clue whatsoever. She has no phone. She's, I've got no way to get ahold of her. 0.93

01:15:43.120 You know what? That, that's actually something that I should probably work on

01:15:47.840 a little more. That's a difficult situation for me though. I mean, the one

01:15:53.080 nice part is at least his dad comes around. Like I always say his dad's kind of

01:16:00.800 useless, which is true. Yes. Um, but at the very least he does come around. Um, 0.99

01:16:09.060 like he picks him up in the mornings for school. He, you know, he sometimes picks

01:16:12.820 him up after school. He'll take him for weekends. You know, he he's at least

01:16:16.880 there. Um, so that is okay. But I do know that like somewhere deep inside it's

01:16:24.680 fucking him up and I know it because I was like, there's a big reason I didn't 0.98

01:16:30.280 say no to this kid. And that reason is because I was that kid and I know what 0.99

01:16:42.780 it's like to feel like nobody wanted you. So when the opportunity came, I thought

01:16:52.500 about it long and hard and I knew that I had to, there was a right for me answer

01:16:59.520 and there was a, just what is right answer. The right for me answer was to say

01:17:05.460 no and not do it and just focus on myself and, and do that. But I knew that that

01:17:13.620 wasn't the right answer. And to do the actual right thing would mean, you know

01:17:20.620 what, I'm going to have to sacrifice something here and I'm going to have to

01:17:25.800 take this kid. And that's, that's where it went. Right. Um, you know, are there

01:17:34.520 some difficulties here and there? Of course there is. Um, you know, nothing,

01:17:38.820 nothing is ever smooth sailing. Um, but overall I certainly don't, I certainly

01:17:45.640 don't regret doing it. The kids, he's a great kid. Um, you know, he's got a great

01:17:50.600 sense of humor, you know, he listens extremely well. Um, and he, and he's

01:17:56.120 extremely polite. Um, and it is very, it's unfortunate that his mother can't do

01:18:03.980 more, I guess, to kind of fix this situation. But, you know, it's kind of one of

01:18:11.460 those, it is what it is. And I, I just have to continue to do what, whatever I

01:18:15.660 can. Right.

01:18:19.300 Well, let's just hope that she comes around one day and gets her shit together 1.00

01:18:22.600 before it kills her. 1.00

01:18:24.320 I'd like to believe that, but I don't, um, it's so fucking hard to get out of 0.98

01:18:31.200 man. Like I, even sometimes today I'm like, I don't know why I, how I quit using

01:18:36.200 cocaine. I just don't understand. Like, I know I went to a treatment center five or

01:18:40.260 six times to get off it and it just never took. And the, the only thing I can

01:18:44.680 chalk it up to is that I changed my life by moving in with the girl I'm with

01:18:48.580 now. And we just don't, it's just not around. We just don't do it. I mean, I

01:18:53.440 got a thousand dollars sitting in my wallet right now. I could go and buy as

01:18:56.940 much cocaine as I wanted, but that's not even, doesn't ever cross my mind, you

01:19:00.980 know, ever. So I don't know how I got away from that. I guess, I guess love from my

01:19:05.940 wife that was the, the antidote to the hole that I was trying to fill with the 1.00

01:19:11.180 drugs. Right.

01:19:12.320 Well, it's like a, like I mentioned earlier, um, there's something that I guess

01:19:23.980 I'm trying, I'm trying to figure out how to word it, but, um, the motivation that

01:19:28.780 a woman can provide, um, I guess is incredible to be perfectly honest. Um,

01:19:36.700 and you really notice it when you've never had it, right? It's one thing if

01:19:41.100 you've always had it your entire life, you've always had a loving mother, you've

01:19:44.400 always had sisters that, you know, whatever. Um, but at the same time, when,

01:19:50.920 when you haven't had that, you understand that it's very fucking difficult to dig

01:19:56.600 up motivation when there's, when there's nobody there to push you, when there's

01:20:00.740 nobody there, um, no, no point of accountability. Yeah. Right. Like it's a,

01:20:07.280 it's almost like there, there's no reason to do anything. You're, you're

01:20:10.940 purposeless and that's a problem. Do you think maybe that's part of the reason

01:20:16.500 why they want to fucking destroy the family unit so, so much because they, I 0.92

01:20:20.800 think it's, yeah, it's part of it, man. I mean, yeah, like I, I saw something, 0.96

01:20:25.880 um, I'm trying to remember how they worded it. Um, but like in terms of, in

01:20:31.300 terms of men anyway, um, those who grew up without a father are angry, but those

01:20:38.940 who grew up without a mother, um, typically do not like, they do not believe

01:20:45.260 their needs are important. True. Right. Yeah. It's like their, their needs have

01:20:51.560 never been attended to because they haven't had that nurturing.

01:20:54.180 They've had to self-soothe. Exactly. And, and self-soothing leads to things like

01:20:59.780 addiction and, or, or on the, the other side of things, uh, self-soothing can

01:21:06.720 also lead you to a life of trying too hard. Yeah. Right. Working too hard at

01:21:13.560 things and yeah. Perfectionism. I went through that phase for a long time. I mean,

01:21:19.840 I was the manager of a car dealership in Vancouver that had, you know, 12 million

01:21:25.560 dollars worth of inventory on the lot. And I thought I was the king of the

01:21:28.660 fucking crack because, you know, I was making 200 grand a year. And then, and then 0.99

01:21:33.300 one day I just realized that, Holy fuck, man, this is not me. And we left the city 0.99

01:21:37.760 and we moved back to the Island with my children. And, uh, it's, it's just strange

01:21:42.940 how we can value ourselves for things that aren't even real. Like I thought that was

01:21:46.600 what I was supposed to be doing. You know, here I am living in fucking Richmond, which 0.99

01:21:49.900 is like chink capital of the world. And, uh, my, my daughter's the only blonde haired 1.00

01:21:53.860 girl in the whole school. Right. And, uh, and I'm happy there. I think I'm paying $5,000

01:21:58.700 a month in rent, you know, it's just crazy shit. It's like, what the fuck? Yeah. It's 1.00

01:22:03.780 in a basement broadcasting about it. Yeah. Yeah. And you thought you were happy, right? It's

01:22:09.380 because it's what everybody else was doing. Yeah. My ex, my ex-wife was a horrible fucking 1.00

01:22:13.580 person too. And I just thought that that's what I, that's what marriage was. Yeah. You 1.00

01:22:19.200 spent lots of money. You went to all the right parties, you shook the right hands, you smiled

01:22:23.260 at the right people. And then you got home at the end of the day and you did it all over

01:22:27.340 again. And then you wake up one day and you look at it and you're like, this is fucking 0.99

01:22:31.060 empty, hollow. I had small children and I couldn't even stand being at home. You know, 0.97

01:22:37.540 I'd go to work at five in the morning and get home at 10 o'clock at night. So they would

01:22:40.940 be asleep and no wonder marriage didn't work out. Yeah. They're hard realizations to come

01:22:49.680 to. Very. Yeah. Yeah. Like I've spent the last, like what, three, four years now coming

01:22:57.740 to a lot of hard realizations. I mean, that's how we started this conversation, right? That

01:23:03.340 as we come into these places in adulthood where we realize and recognize what happened and how

01:23:09.520 those things affected us in childhood and how they come up in adulthood. And they all

01:23:13.300 just start to come up and we don't, and we're like, oh, good. So now we have to deal with

01:23:19.260 this. And then you're faced with it and you have no choice, but to deal with those things.

01:23:29.000 Well, it's also funny too, because like you, you spend a lifetime just believing like you're

01:23:34.780 different somehow. Right. Um, like that you're the only one experiencing this, that, you know,

01:23:43.900 things like that. Yeah. You're unique. Terminally unique.

01:23:49.240 Wait, that's the wrong one. I'm trying to send trad wife. Uh, don't that first one's stupid. Don't 1.00

01:23:56.960 do that one. Don't do that. Yeah. I know it's wrong. Like I know, I know I'm an idiot. Hold

01:24:01.420 on. I'm getting it. Admitting it is the first step. Yeah. Right. Yeah. This is all about honesty

01:24:06.940 here. Um, I'm an idiot. No, but you just, you just made a good point, Sarah. You just said that 1.00

01:24:17.840 admitting it is the first step, but let me tell you, let me add onto that a little bit. If you

01:24:22.380 actually read what the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous says, it doesn't say we admitted. 0.96

01:24:26.360 It says, it says we admitted we, so you can fucking admit it to yourself all day long, but until you 0.86

01:24:32.180 talk about it with somebody, with another human being or your God, your higher power, whatever it be, 0.96

01:24:36.940 it's just going to sit there and fester. You can't fix your fucking own brain. It's like our 1.00

01:24:40.260 government can't fix itself. Our military can't fix itself. You have to help each other. I'll tell

01:24:44.540 you right now that that specific step you're talking about. Um, now I did go to AA. I did not

01:24:50.160 get through all of the steps necessarily, but I did get to that one and holy fuck. You're talking 1.00

01:24:58.120 about step five? Uh, well, it's step four and five really. Like it's kind of that combination

01:25:03.380 of them, the taking the self inventory, the, you know, admitting to you, God and another

01:25:08.860 person, the wrongs that you've committed. Um, things like, like that is where, when I talk

01:25:14.480 about my ego has been destroyed, that was what did it. Um, it was looking back on all of the

01:25:25.320 different things. And like, it was a rough moment too, because I also, like, I didn't really

01:25:31.340 know where to go with it because I was kind of doing it on my own, um, for the first little

01:25:35.100 bit. And I found this, yeah, I found this like workbook that kind of, it would ask you

01:25:41.820 questions and they tell you to write it with pen and paper because writing with pen and

01:25:46.700 paper is a better way of transferring those feelings out. Um, and there were some fucking 0.98

01:25:51.040 tough questions in there, man. Like made me think of things that I had not thought about 0.98

01:25:59.500 in a long time and took me back to moments, um, where I got to feel exactly what I felt

01:26:06.980 in that moment all over again. And that scared the fuck out of me. Um, like I am not going

01:26:15.320 to lie there. There was, there's one, one in particular that I just step away because it

01:26:21.260 kind of broke me a little bit. And that was to, I was asking in childhood, um, if you've

01:26:29.040 ever had like suicidal thoughts or anything like that. And that took me back to a moment

01:26:36.280 where I was sitting on the bottom bunk of my bed. I think I would have been about seven.

01:26:44.040 I had a kitchen knife and I sat on my bed with that kitchen knife to my wrist

01:26:49.420 and I thought about it. 0.99

01:26:57.240 And so when that question came up and I had to come back to that moment, like that fucking killed 0.98

01:27:06.200 me. Um, that was, that was absolutely brutal. 0.98

01:27:15.420 I'm sorry.

01:27:17.000 I mean, it is what it is, right? I was, I was a child that had absolutely no idea how to deal

01:27:23.340 with feelings. I had no idea how to deal with what I was looking at. And worst of all, and I realized

01:27:28.400 this as an adult now, hindsight being what it is, I didn't see what I had, which I think

01:27:37.360 is the bigger problem. Because at that point in time, sitting in that room as that seven

01:27:42.620 year old child, I had grandparents out in the living room. They were doing their fucking 1.00

01:27:49.360 damnedest for me. They were working their ass off to make sure that I felt welcome and make 0.99

01:27:55.360 sure that I felt loved and to make sure that I got to do things. But I just didn't see

01:28:00.320 it. All I saw was I don't have my mother. I don't have my father. And that fucked me up.

01:28:12.980 Yeah. Like I went through like a similar thing, but I was, I was quite a bit older and like my

01:28:18.800 parents were always separated since before I could remember. So I always had like this longing

01:28:22.500 to have my dad around, but I had my stepdad who like took me in as his own. Right. And

01:28:29.400 but there was this time when I was like 15 years old, where my mom went through like a

01:28:34.340 midlife crisis and ended up like, she ended up like encouraging me to drop out of school

01:28:39.020 and like quit my job. And then all of a sudden I'm like living in this house that she rented

01:28:43.340 by herself. And all I have to eat is like fucking canned corn and shit like that. And she like 1.00

01:28:48.440 wasn't talking to me. And like, she's like, the only way I could see you is if like, we

01:28:53.040 don't talk about shit from the past. And like, it really fucked me up. Right. Cause I'm like 0.99

01:28:56.940 turning into a woman and I'm like, don't have my mom there. And so for a lot of, a lot of

01:29:02.940 my life, like I held a lot of resentment to the point where I didn't even talk to her for

01:29:07.120 a long time and just totally cut her out with like totally not let her contact me and stuff.

01:29:12.300 But then I came to a point when my son was about four years old, where I had had like

01:29:18.880 now my own experience with my children. And I thought to myself like, holy fuck, man, 0.99

01:29:24.120 like my mom is just a human being, like a soul in a meat suit. And she went through some things 0.99

01:29:32.160 that really fucked her up. And like, I can actually now like find forgiveness for that

01:29:36.500 and not just totally hold like this grudge against her for not being there and stuff and move

01:29:41.680 on. And in doing that, it's made me a better person, even though it's been like incredibly

01:29:45.740 painful and it was incredibly painful all those years. And, and like my sister's going through

01:29:52.380 the same thing right now. She doesn't have kids yet, but she can't see that like mom was,

01:29:56.340 was actually doing her best because her mother was very abusive. So she didn't really know how

01:30:01.580 to be a good mom. And, and I turned out good. And my sister turned out a pretty good person

01:30:06.220 too. And I say that to her all the time. Like, even though our parents fucked up, like you

01:30:10.680 have to find forgiveness for it, that they are just a human being too. And they probably 0.97

01:30:16.320 did do the best they could, you know, and for yourself too. Like you have to be able

01:30:21.560 to forgive yourself for the things that you had to go through. Right. Yeah.

01:30:27.900 Well, I think coming to terms with our parents is, is definitely key to being an adult. I mean,

01:30:34.080 it's, I couldn't imagine not having parents. Like I grew up, I had a step, stepdad and a mom,

01:30:38.920 and it was a pretty caring house. I think like we weren't rich, but it was just like a working

01:30:43.840 house. And I, I always remember my mom always being there for me, but my father, my biological

01:30:50.660 father, all I was taught as like a little boy was that he was a drug addict and he was abusive and

01:30:56.980 my mom couldn't be with him cause he, he hurt her. Right. And, and then we never, she kept him away

01:31:02.880 from me. He was trying to contact me growing up and, and he, and, and she kept him away from me because

01:31:07.640 she was afraid that he was going to try and, you know, get custody and take me back to the United

01:31:11.780 States or to Israel, wherever they were. And then, um, and then, uh, I got a book when I was about 19

01:31:19.800 years, I got a package in the mail when I was, I was just turned 19. My mom gave it to me and it,

01:31:24.700 it's, it was a book and it was titled is alcoholism hereditary. And then it said, you know, that he'd been

01:31:29.620 in AA for 25 years now or 20 years or whatever he'd been in and that he was sober and he was changed

01:31:34.640 his life. And, you know, he really wanted, and there was a plane ticket to Israel in there.

01:31:38.960 And, uh, and my mom didn't give me the plane ticket though. She didn't tell me about that

01:31:44.240 cause she was worried I would fucking go. And I probably would have at the time, but then I, 0.97

01:31:47.880 so I never spoke to him until I was about 37 years old. And I was, I remember I was in this motel room,

01:31:52.460 this logging camp motel room and, uh, and the phone rang and it was him and he'd got my number from my mom.

01:31:59.580 My mom had given it to him and I talked to him and we agreed, oh yeah, this is great.

01:32:03.460 We got to keep in touch. We have another conversation and I never heard from him again.

01:32:07.580 So I was a little bit fucking sad about that. You know, that old feeling of not being good enough 0.93

01:32:11.860 again, just fucking rooted right back up. But then he died like, uh, I don't know, a couple of years 0.95

01:32:17.320 ago now, but he died. And then for whatever reason, when he was gone, I automatically, I just felt this

01:32:22.160 relief. Like it didn't fucking matter anymore. Like it was, you know, he's got it. He had another family, 0.93

01:32:27.740 a Jew wife and two kids and they live in a different country, but it just didn't matter 0.98

01:32:34.840 anymore to me that that pain just, I don't know. And now today I can look and I can say, you know

01:32:39.020 what, I may not be the best father, but I'm fucking a sight better than the father I had. And you know, 0.97

01:32:44.260 if that's all I can do, then all I can do. Right. I just spent, you know, a couple nights with my son

01:32:48.460 out in the bush and fuck, what a gift. The fact that I was able to actually even be there with him 0.99

01:32:53.020 where I think back, you know, and I tell my kids, it's like, you know, your parents aren't perfect, 0.98

01:32:58.440 but some people don't have any parents and that's, that's a fucking chore. So, you know, you have, 0.94

01:33:04.380 you have a dad that loves you. You have a mom that's a fucking idiot, but she loves you, you know? So 1.00

01:33:08.740 I don't know. It's hard to tell a kid you should be grateful for what you have, but

01:33:13.440 I don't think we realize that until we're older, you know, until we're parents ourselves or, you know?

01:33:19.020 No, it is definitely tough. Like, like, it's funny because I, like with my own mother,

01:33:29.120 there's certainly nothing solved there. I can, I can say that. Like I've, I've made, I've made

01:33:37.120 attempts, but they've all kind of ended the same and it's gotten kind of frustrating, but

01:33:43.440 I, I can at the very least, like, I sort of understand it, I guess. Um, like I, I get

01:33:51.840 that shit wasn't easy for her and I understand that. I mean, obviously having, um, been a father 0.99

01:33:58.400 and now also taking care of my nephew, I understand this whole parenting thing is not fucking easy. 0.96

01:34:03.400 Um, it is hard and half the time you're just fucking making it up as you go along. Um, but 0.94

01:34:10.520 it's, it's so like, there, there's that part of me that is forgiving of that, but there's also other

01:34:18.840 things that happen that I still am having a very, very difficult time in, in finding that forgiveness.

01:34:27.020 Yeah. It's super hard. I don't think you need to, I'm sorry. Um, I was going to say, I was going to

01:34:35.400 say, you don't need to forgive her so much. You need to forgive yourself because what she's done

01:34:40.340 is her, is her side of the street and there's nothing you can do about that. It's happened.

01:34:44.320 It's over. And that, that's what I came to terms with, with my dad was like, you know, he told me

01:34:48.500 that he had tried to, he had tried to contact me many times. My mom just basically blocked him from

01:34:53.960 being in connection with me. And for a bit, I felt resentment towards my mom. Like,

01:34:57.700 how can you do this to me? You lied to me, you know? And she was, she was very apologetic,

01:35:02.760 but she's like, you know, I just did it to protect you because I didn't know what you would do.

01:35:06.180 Like I did. So, and then I realized that she'd done the best job that she could do with what she

01:35:12.180 was equipped to do it with. Right. She had a fucking crescent wrench and she stripped a couple of nuts 1.00

01:35:16.660 with it, but that's what fucking happens. Right. So that doesn't mean I I'm perfect, but I mean, 1.00

01:35:23.740 I'm able to have that freedom now of knowing that it wasn't Jason that my dad didn't like.

01:35:29.120 It was, it wasn't Jason that my mom didn't like. It was a protection, you know, a defense mechanism

01:35:33.860 that my mom didn't know what else to do. She didn't, she was afraid for my safety. So how could

01:35:38.940 I be resentful towards her for something, this choice that she had to make? Because she was just

01:35:44.780 a fucking baby too, right? 0.99

01:35:45.960 From my own situation, I have to be like with that kind of thing myself, very careful because 1.00

01:35:52.040 my situation with my son's dad is that he was incredibly abusive towards me. Like my, I felt

01:35:58.380 like my life was threatened and he verbally like threatened my life and like physically threatened

01:36:02.560 it on multiple times. And like, yeah, he was charged and everything like that. But still now,

01:36:08.820 like fucking eight years later, almost nine years later, I still have to see it like, okay, 0.99

01:36:14.520 my son has a relationship with this man and this man is his dad. Right. So I can't be like 0.99

01:36:20.660 negative towards him and be like, honestly, your dad's negative. Your dad's negative. Your dad's

01:36:25.420 negative. His dad is still a dick, not going to lie, like a huge fucking dick. And he treats 1.00

01:36:30.240 him, my, our son like crap sometimes. And I will be honest with him. I'm not going to gaslight 0.99

01:36:35.820 him and saying, no, dad wasn't being a dick. Just forget about it or whatever. But I also at the 0.97

01:36:41.480 same time have to encourage, like, you know, um, like still respect your dad and you can talk to

01:36:47.060 mom about when things like you think things are off and stuff like that. But I have to just let him

01:36:52.780 see who his dad is for himself. Right. I have to let him learn it from his own eyes instead of like

01:36:59.300 me putting it into his head, like this fear of him all the time. Cause I feel like, like that's wrong

01:37:04.320 in itself. And I have, I do feel like I have done that in ways in the past. And it's just actually

01:37:09.300 like this past year, I'm realizing like, Hey, like things are going to sort itself out. Like,

01:37:13.820 like God is watching everything too. And, and everything happens for a reason. And all it's

01:37:18.520 going to do is I'm still loving and putting in the good values and doing the best I can as his mom,

01:37:23.340 that things will work out in the end. Right. Or else it's so fucking stressful and the kids feel it so

01:37:29.480 much. Like my son, he feels everything, like everything that I feel, he feels. So I have to 0.96

01:37:34.400 be careful. Like when I know there's a visit or a phone call coming up, I have to like try and keep

01:37:39.820 my anxiety down and just like act like I'm feeling normal. You know what I mean?

01:37:46.040 Yeah. Yeah. And I think, uh, like another thing that I've learned too is, and Jason kind of said it

01:37:53.800 earlier is forgiving myself. That's a tough one. Right. Cause I look back at myself as a child

01:37:59.320 and some of the decisions that I've made. Um, there's one in particular actually, uh, and it's

01:38:06.620 hilarious because I do, I fucking, I blamed myself for so long for making that decision. And it wasn't 0.51

01:38:14.040 until I had my own son that I kind of started to realize that the stupidity in holding a grudge 0.99

01:38:24.000 against myself for a decision I made when I was younger and understanding that at that time, 0.98

01:38:30.660 I didn't understand the decision I made. And the one I'm talking about specifically was I left my

01:38:35.680 grandparents to go live with my father. Uh, I think that was around what grade six, maybe grade seven.

01:38:41.600 Um, and I, I don't know why there was just, maybe I wasn't liking the rules, something,

01:38:49.100 something was going that way. And I just didn't like what was going on anymore. And I, I found

01:38:53.160 where my dad was and I said, fuck it. Going to live with my dad. Fuck you guys. And I was told 1.00

01:39:00.080 if I went that I couldn't come back and I was like, fuck you, I'm going. That lasted three months. 1.00

01:39:07.080 No, no. Um, I never asked either though. That's the other thing. Um, when my grandparents had said

01:39:17.480 that I never even bothered to ask if I could come back. I just assumed that they said that that's

01:39:23.120 what that meant. Done. Okay. And that's when I, within the three months I started talking to my

01:39:29.260 mother and moved in with her, which again, another terrible decision. Um, but these are things that

01:39:36.980 in hindsight, they're terrible decisions. And I understand that when I made those decisions at the

01:39:44.160 time, I wanted something and I wanted something that I had always desperately wanted and finally

01:39:53.580 thought I was getting, but unfortunately, well, my dad or my, either one of them. Yeah. Right. It did.

01:40:02.320 I did like at that point, I didn't give a fuck which one, just one of them. Um, and unfortunately 0.99

01:40:10.160 for me, um, making that decision led to me also realizing that I should have never left my grandparents.

01:40:17.860 And this is where I've learned that I didn't see what I had in front of me. I didn't see the things

01:40:23.380 that I really had. All I saw is what I lost. And it's, it made me realize now just how much we

01:40:33.780 actually do take for granted. Um, because yeah, there's a lot of us, we got a lot of shit right 0.99

01:40:39.720 in front of us that we can be grateful for, but how many of us choose to look at what we 0.96

01:40:47.440 don't have, what we're missing, what, you know, something that we want instead when the reality

01:40:56.960 is, is I think a lot of the stuff that's right in front of us could be, could be very beneficial

01:41:01.860 to realize we have at least. It's a fucking hard life, man, for all of us. And that's, 0.95

01:41:12.520 that's the thing you have to, it really helps me to go through life, looking at people as

01:41:17.740 children, right? Like, yeah, you're, you're an adult, you're growing Johnny. But if I look

01:41:23.240 at you, it's like, okay, you're, you're a product of your, your youth. So there's things

01:41:29.560 that happen to people that we don't see those. There's, it's not like a big fucking scar across 0.96

01:41:33.440 your face where you can say, Oh shit, what happened there? No, but there's all these scars 0.99

01:41:37.200 that can be hidden inside. And, and, you know, you talk, that's part of probably why you like

01:41:43.240 to drink. It was probably because you had all this fucking pain. You didn't know how to deal 0.99

01:41:46.640 with it. You had this giant hole in your fucking heart that you're trying to fill with booze 1.00

01:41:50.280 or drugs or sex or shopping, whatever. And until you can come to, come to terms with, with 1.00

01:41:57.780 either, you know, a spiritual connection or God or, or whatever, whatever your choice

01:42:02.560 is. I mean, I don't think you can fill that hole. Like it's, it's a bottomless fucking

01:42:06.540 pit. And I think that's partially what happened for me was that I stopped worrying about driving 0.99

01:42:13.440 the nicest car or having the fucking hottest girlfriend or making the most money. It just

01:42:17.620 because none of that shit fucking matters at the, if at the end of the day, I'm sitting 1.00

01:42:20.980 on my bed with a empty revolver wishing I had bullets, right? Like it doesn't fucking 1.00

01:42:26.400 matter. And it's so hard to explain this to your children without scaring the shit out 0.99

01:42:32.540 of them. Cause I did it the other day with my son. Right. And I told him to fuck off and 0.95

01:42:36.060 not come back. And they, fuck, I cried for two days because I'm worried he might not come 1.00

01:42:40.960 back. 0.99

01:42:42.120 This is why one of the, one of the things that I tried to work with on my son and I definitely 1.00

01:42:47.160 worked with on Connor is don't listen to your stupid friends. 1.00

01:42:50.540 Yeah. Right. Because there's a lot of things that I did that were a result of the way my 1.00

01:42:58.940 friends would react. Yeah. Right. Um, like I, I would never have this conversation back

01:43:06.760 in high school because I would figure that immediately I'd be called a fag. I'd be called 0.98

01:43:11.300 weak. I would be, you know, all sorts of different derogatory terms that would run me down for being

01:43:19.600 honest with the way I feel. Um, whereas now I, now I don't give a fuck, whatever you come 0.99

01:43:26.040 at me for it. I dare you. Right. There's almost like nothing more attractive to a woman and 0.99

01:43:32.080 she doesn't even like realize why she's attracted to it. Cause it's happening unconsciously. But

01:43:36.640 like when a man is open and calm about his emotions and talking to her about it, like nothing builds

01:43:42.560 trust faster. I'm telling you because mine and Rose relationship was built on 3000 hours of

01:43:48.220 conversations that are exactly like this one that we're having right now. And that's why,

01:43:52.640 like, I trust him so fucking much is because I know that he's not going to make a decision based 0.83

01:43:58.120 on his emotions without talking to me about it first. Yeah. Right. Yeah. The foundation on

01:44:04.100 communication is so paramount to being able to have a withstanding trustful relationship with

01:44:12.760 somebody and to be able to create that at the beginning and build that foundation from the

01:44:19.500 ground out allows you to be able to, um, to, to go through situations, whether they be good,

01:44:28.760 like negative or positive, but you're able to go through those situations as a unit, knowing that

01:44:33.160 the person that you, you can depend on that person and rely on them to not make decisions based on,

01:44:39.220 again, emotions or something like that. You know, that, that those things are going to be

01:44:44.420 dealt with as a unit. And that's, what's so important is being able to create that communication

01:44:50.540 foundation because it just allows everything to build on it. Right.

01:44:56.540 Well, there's also something, there's also something else that I've, I've come to a realization

01:45:00.960 on as well. Like looking back in my past relationships, um, and like speaking on that reacting emotionally

01:45:09.520 bit, um, I've realized that there's a lot of times that I reacted in anger, but it wasn't anger.

01:45:20.400 That wasn't the actual emotion. Fear. It was actually that I was hurt. Yeah. Yeah. But

01:45:26.920 it manifests as anger a lot. Well, and especially because again, I'm coming from that place of,

01:45:34.060 I don't want to feel weak. I don't want to appear weak. So if I can turn that into anger,

01:45:39.560 anger seems like strength to me. And you can't get hurt if you put up the walls right away. So it's

01:45:45.700 like, fuck you get your own sandwich. Right. Right away. And it's like, that's, that's, 1.00

01:45:52.560 that's what happens. So see, I worry about that because I'm, I found myself to be that way in like

01:45:59.180 dealing with regular people on the outside, you know, I've, I've, I immediately write people off

01:46:05.120 because I'm like, Oh, you got blue hair. So you have no use to me. Right. You have a fucking 0.98

01:46:11.080 rainbow sticker on your car. So you're a fucking idiot. You know, you got, I just, I do this all the 1.00

01:46:16.960 time. And I realized that it's not healthy for me to sit there and, you know, discredit somebody.

01:46:21.840 You never know who's going to be the person that might, you know, I don't know, make you realize

01:46:27.520 something that you didn't know. So it's, it's fucking hard, man. It's really hard. I don't 0.91

01:46:33.600 want to be, I don't want to be a hateful person. I mean, I joke about being a bigot and I make racial 0.96

01:46:37.660 jokes and shit, but I don't really want to be that person. I want to be the person that, you know, 0.86

01:46:41.440 my kids are proud to be, have as their dad, not, you know, well, my dad hates Jews and Hindus. Like 1.00

01:46:47.760 that's, it's not, it's not what I aspire to be. If you know what I mean?

01:46:52.040 I don't think it's that like, this is where they confuse everything. We don't hate these

01:46:55.680 people for being who they are. No, we just, it just happens that they're the people doing

01:47:00.640 the stuff to us. Okay. I'm not a fan of the government. I'm not necessarily a hateful

01:47:06.760 towards a group of people. However, yeah, the what's right in my face. I can't deny.

01:47:14.240 Yeah. I hate corruption is what I hate at the end of the day. So it doesn't matter who

01:47:17.400 you are, what color your skin is, what religion you follow. If you're corrupt, I'm not going 0.94

01:47:20.940 to like you. It's true. 0.99

01:47:29.040 When I go about intentions too, right?

01:47:31.260 Yeah. My, my dad married a Jew and moved to Israel with her and I have two sisters

01:47:41.780 there. So, but that doesn't mean that's not why I, I don't hate Jews. I don't, I don't

01:47:48.420 like Zionists. I don't even know if I hate them. I just don't, I don't like what what's 1.00

01:47:53.540 happened, right? I just don't like, sorry. I watched Europa, right? Yeah. I always go

01:48:01.680 back to this in revelation at two nine or two 10. It says, it says, I know like the blaspheming

01:48:11.880 and the evil, something along these lines, I'm paraphrasing of the Jews that say they are 1.00

01:48:17.600 Jews, but are not Jews. They are of the synagogue of Satan. And it's the Jews that are actually 1.00

01:48:22.720 pretending to be the chosen people. Okay. Which is the Kazarian mafia. Yeah. So it's not

01:48:29.660 all Jews. Like there's Orthodox Jews. There's lots of different groups of Jews out there who

01:48:33.680 actually totally against what's going on right now. Oh yeah, for sure. Yeah. Yeah. And

01:48:38.820 I mean, you can say the same thing.

01:48:42.320 My daddy watches Europa new kids book.

01:48:45.580 That's almost as good as my idea is Europa and chill.

01:48:53.180 Yeah. Imagine we wrote a kid's book about Europa. Oh my God. Like a kid's picture book

01:48:59.100 based on Europa. That would be wonderful. Like a day. We could, we got a bunch of motherfuckers. 1.00

01:49:04.960 I got a bunch of motherfuckers could do the AI imaging. Right. I know Jason can too. Right. 1.00

01:49:10.700 I mean, he's in there, you know, we could get her done. Yeah.

01:49:17.500 I stumbled across this interesting fellow, just a little segue here because it's getting

01:49:22.320 pretty dark, but I stumbled across a interesting fellow on, um, bit shoot actually. And then

01:49:28.500 I found him on rumble, but, uh, yeah, he's talking all about the chem trails. And cause we

01:49:34.620 were talking about that yesterday, I think on free stones and somebody was saying that they

01:49:37.680 don't put them on commercial airlines. Well, they fucking do. And this guy's all about that. 0.99

01:49:42.740 It's quite an interesting thing. And he has thousands and thousands of documents about it.

01:49:47.500 Um, I looked at this, this photo album, somebody made it. It's all the newspaper headlines about,

01:49:52.280 uh, uh, what do you call it? Like, uh, geoengineering. And it's literally one image and you can

01:49:58.740 scroll through it and there's a thousand fucking newspaper clippings for each year. It's like, 0.99

01:50:06.400 it's insane that we have been so blinded to this. Um, if you go, if you go on YouTube and

01:50:12.660 you look up Curtis stone, I don't know if you guys know who that is off grid with Curtis stone.

01:50:17.020 He's a Canadian guy. He's very well known. Um, rogues a mod on his channel, but, um,

01:50:22.440 he actually did a FOIA request on the chem trails and stuff and the government got back to him and

01:50:27.460 he's got documents of it even down to every time they sprayed. Okay. Well, they're talking about like,

01:50:33.740 they're, they're fucking doing brief. Like they, they tested on the U S population and they have 0.96

01:50:37.900 like doctors coming to their houses and testing the people to see what happened. Right. Like

01:50:42.220 they're, there's one little town. There's like 150 cases of this super rare cancer. And they're,

01:50:49.040 they're all just like, Oh, I don't know. It's like Aaron Brockovich. Like the story, but yeah,

01:50:54.480 I don't, I don't know. It's fucking insane. People all the time. Well, this guy's idea is that 0.99

01:51:00.240 they're going to fucking hit us with big time with climate change, uh, propaganda this summer. 0.93

01:51:04.900 And that's why they're like, I'm serious. Yesterday I was watching and I know I'm, 0.94

01:51:08.940 I'm a little hyper, uh, noticeable noticing, but there were so many fucking sprays yesterday. 0.92

01:51:13.780 It was, there's something's happening. Like who the fuck's paying for this? Cause these planes 0.99

01:51:18.180 don't fly for free. Right. The other day I saw two planes flying right next to each other,

01:51:23.500 spraying at the same time. Yeah. Yeah. That happens a lot where I am too. You see them when they,

01:51:29.060 they do like grids. So it looks like a tic-tac-toe board. Yeah, exactly. Oh yeah.

01:51:35.080 Well, that's what he was showing on this one. That's how you know that they're doing something

01:51:38.280 that's planned because it's in a grid. Tell me that's not, tell me that you're not like,

01:51:43.720 well, there there's, there, there's this picture of this sun dog and it's a beautiful big sun dog 0.99

01:51:48.660 and it's got like 15 fucking, it's like a, it's like a star almost like, it's like, holy fuck. 0.99

01:51:53.940 Yeah. Yeah. I'm trying to find that guy's name. It's been pretty crazy lately. 1.00

01:52:00.620 Yeah, definitely. And like, I remember talking to a buddy of mine, uh, his mom lived in Argentina

01:52:06.180 and she flew here at one point in time. And it was just funny because it's like,

01:52:10.680 you just assume this shit happens everywhere, but apparently not. Cause she gets off the plane, 1.00

01:52:17.460 looks up, sees the trails and is like, what are those? Why, why, why do you have clouds like that?

01:52:24.460 She thought they were clouds.

01:52:26.300 Well, you can't put it into the chat here.

01:52:28.460 Um, and it's, I don't know.

01:52:33.000 I'm just going to drop a link in the chat.

01:52:37.400 Excuse me.

01:52:38.320 But yeah, it's just, it's, it's one of those things where it's like, you know,

01:52:41.480 I just kind of assume that, you know, these things happen everywhere.

01:52:45.600 This is just the way it is for everyone.

01:52:48.120 And then you start to learn that no, certain countries don't have this.

01:52:51.980 And then it's like, that's, that's where it starts to go into.

01:52:55.140 Okay. Well, why, why is it that, you know, this is something that happens here, but not there.

01:53:02.660 Yeah. The guy's name is climate viewer.

01:53:05.100 And I think his name's, I can't remember his name actually, but yeah, it was, 0.98

01:53:10.060 there's a whole bunch of good shit on his website. 1.00

01:53:12.640 The fuck is on my chin. 1.00

01:53:15.600 What happens when you've got a table? 1.00

01:53:24.140 I've been like working my ass off since seven 30 this morning.

01:53:27.220 I should be working now too, but I thought I'd take a little break.

01:53:30.280 There you go.

01:53:32.140 I've been working too, but from my phone and yeah, well, you know, when my day starts.

01:53:37.060 So yeah,

01:53:38.180 I got new chickens today and I had to do hay first thing and make everything nice.

01:53:42.360 So yeah, it's been busy for a new chicken.

01:53:47.220 East coast.

01:53:47.820 I put it in the bigot off the link there for you.

01:53:52.300 Yeah.

01:53:53.580 Trying to,

01:53:54.200 trying to work a deal and see if I can get my nephew picked up.

01:53:56.380 Cause it's pretty snowy out there.

01:53:57.740 Let's see if it works.

01:53:59.200 And my dad came in,

01:54:00.360 my dad came in and my stepdad came and picked my son up this morning.

01:54:02.980 He's taking them for the day in the truck.

01:54:04.720 When he does like a,

01:54:06.540 he's got a high up truck.

01:54:07.700 So gets suspended.

01:54:09.560 Are you offering happy endings for someone to go pick up Connor from school?

01:54:13.180 No,

01:54:13.480 God,

01:54:13.860 no,

01:54:14.280 no,

01:54:15.220 no,

01:54:15.680 no,

01:54:16.280 no,

01:54:17.280 no,

01:54:17.780 no,

01:54:17.960 no,

01:54:18.280 no,

01:54:18.680 no,

01:54:18.920 no,

01:54:19.160 no,

01:54:19.360 no,

01:54:19.960 no,

01:54:20.040 no,

01:54:21.040 no,

01:54:21.280 no,

01:54:21.920 no,

01:54:21.960 no,

01:54:21.980 no,

01:54:22.040 no,

01:54:22.600 no,

01:54:22.620 no,

01:54:22.640 no,

01:54:22.660 no,

01:54:22.680 no,

01:54:22.760 no,

01:54:24.680 no,

01:54:24.740 no,

01:54:24.760 no,

01:54:24.800 no,

01:54:24.820 no,

01:54:26.740 no,

01:54:26.820 no,

01:54:26.840 no,

01:54:28.800 no,

01:54:30.740 no,

01:54:30.760 no,

01:54:32.760 no,

01:54:32.800 no,

01:54:34.720 you guys had such hot weather last week or two weeks ago.

01:54:37.460 And then this is Ontario.

01:54:38.900 Yeah.

01:54:39.340 We're supposed to get 15 centimeters of snow in the next two days. 1.00

01:54:43.000 Like it's stupid. 0.99

01:54:45.000 So full on blizzard. 1.00

01:54:46.260 Western Ontario.

01:54:47.760 Yeah.

01:54:48.580 It's like plus 20.

01:54:49.640 And then they're like, 1.00

01:54:50.380 fuck you. 1.00

01:54:50.920 Minus 15. 1.00

01:54:52.260 We just had like four days of,

01:54:54.080 of heavy,

01:54:55.040 heavy aerial spring. 0.98

01:54:56.420 And this morning I got up and it's all fucking overcast. 0.98

01:54:59.080 And yeah, 0.98

01:55:00.460 yeah.

01:55:00.700 We were supposed to go camping this weekend.

01:55:02.520 Now we're, 0.98

01:55:03.240 it's going to be fucking raining. 0.98

01:55:04.220 Sure. 1.00

01:55:06.660 Bastard's busy. 0.98

01:55:08.820 Well, 0.72

01:55:09.220 there we go.

01:55:12.420 Anyways,

01:55:12.880 guys,

01:55:13.140 I better go.

01:55:13.840 I was just popping on for a quick one.

01:55:15.540 I love this conversation.

01:55:16.540 I was like bawling my eyes out before,

01:55:18.200 but for whatever reason,

01:55:19.120 I have less emotions when I'm on camera.

01:55:21.980 So my defense mechanism.

01:55:24.180 I wish I could say the same,

01:55:25.760 but I love you guys.

01:55:27.540 And we'll chat soon.

01:55:29.120 Yeah.

01:55:29.720 Have a good one.

01:55:30.960 Bye sweetheart.

01:55:32.400 Bye.

01:55:33.560 So now what do we,

01:55:34.740 what do we want to do here,

01:55:35.700 Sarah?

01:55:35.960 Cause if you can,

01:55:36.940 if you can carry it from like three to three 30,

01:55:39.720 I'll just go and get them and come back.

01:55:41.400 But otherwise we'll probably wrap it up at three.

01:55:43.960 Oh yeah.

01:55:44.960 I don't know.

01:55:45.780 What does anybody else?

01:55:48.120 You want to talk?

01:55:49.640 I know.

01:55:49.880 I know Tom mentioned he wanted to come on so I can send him a link if we

01:55:53.240 want.

01:55:53.360 Yeah.

01:55:53.540 Bring some people in.

01:55:54.340 I'll go upstairs and get a drink and come back down.

01:55:56.080 I don't mind keeping going.

01:55:59.300 I just,

01:55:59.620 I'm going to have to run to the school real quick.

01:56:01.260 That's going to take about 20 minutes to a half hour.

01:56:03.840 Yeah,

01:56:04.120 that's fine.

01:56:04.700 If other people want to come on,

01:56:07.020 Jason can make a drink and then I'll go make a drink and then you can

01:56:09.620 please.

01:56:10.060 I'll be right back.

01:56:10.960 He can carry it.

01:56:12.260 I can go in the,

01:56:13.200 in the snow storm and then come back with a weather report.

01:56:16.380 There you go.

01:56:17.720 So exciting.

01:56:19.460 Something like that.

01:56:20.120 Maybe,

01:56:20.480 maybe I'll try and force the cat to sit in the camera. 0.99

01:56:25.220 Oh,

01:56:25.500 Cooter stared.

01:56:26.760 Yeah.

01:56:27.000 Where is Cooter? 1.00

01:56:27.780 You can stare at your pussy. 1.00

01:56:30.220 I feel like that's blood. 1.00

01:56:31.340 Cooter,

01:56:31.580 Cooter is usually under the Christmas tree,

01:56:33.940 but she's angry with you.

01:56:37.020 She might be.

01:56:38.060 I don't know.

01:56:40.500 Well,

01:56:40.920 I haven't given her treats actually,

01:56:42.380 so she might actually be a little busy. 1.00

01:56:44.320 What the fuck? 1.00

01:56:44.980 How did you not give her treats? 1.00

01:56:46.520 That's not fair. 1.00

01:56:47.500 She's a bitch and she asks me all the time. 1.00

01:56:49.440 So I sometimes ignore her. 1.00

01:56:51.940 Like I can't even make dinner without her being in my feet, 0.97

01:56:54.640 meowing at me,

01:56:55.440 wanting treats.

01:56:56.240 So I don't know.

01:56:57.440 You got some issues.

01:56:59.140 They're off.

01:56:59.800 They're off napping somewhere.

01:57:01.140 I don't.

01:57:03.020 Well,

01:57:03.480 Zena,

01:57:03.900 Zena's in the, 0.98

01:57:04.760 in the cat tree.

01:57:05.580 Actually,

01:57:05.880 you know,

01:57:06.400 Cooter,

01:57:06.800 nevermind.

01:57:07.300 I'm wrong.

01:57:07.760 Cooter is under the tree.

01:57:10.260 Yeah.

01:57:10.620 She just got like,

01:57:11.480 you know,

01:57:11.680 the little box skirt thing that goes around the bottom of the Christmas tree.

01:57:15.500 Yeah.

01:57:15.620 She's like in that.

01:57:17.200 Oh yeah.

01:57:18.340 She likes to hide in there. 1.00

01:57:19.760 Oh,

01:57:20.640 I love that. 1.00

01:57:21.220 You still have fucking Christmas tree now. 0.99

01:57:23.160 Yeah. 1.00

01:57:23.400 Since 2019.

01:57:24.940 Yeah.

01:57:27.320 Right.

01:57:28.540 Is it because I got it like six boosters or.

01:57:31.920 Well,

01:57:32.380 no,

01:57:32.720 I like it because a,

01:57:33.940 it's a pre COVID relic.

01:57:36.320 That's nice.

01:57:38.020 Um,

01:57:38.380 it reminds me of a time when things were better.

01:57:42.440 Um,

01:57:42.760 also the fact that I live in an apartment.

01:57:45.920 So storage space is at a minimum.

01:57:49.800 And third, 0.62

01:57:50.680 a little bit of laziness in the fact that I really fucking hate having to take it down, 0.87

01:57:56.140 put it up, 0.94

01:57:56.700 take it down,

01:57:57.260 put it up,

01:57:57.760 take it down,

01:57:58.260 put it up. 0.94

01:57:58.660 So I just fucking leave the whole thing up. 0.93

01:58:00.600 You mean once a year you have to take it down, 0.95

01:58:02.520 put it up,

01:58:03.120 whatever.

01:58:04.740 It's this is better.

01:58:06.620 I put it up once and I've never even taken it down.

01:58:09.440 So.

01:58:09.800 I feel like that is like the same mentality is like,

01:58:15.200 well,

01:58:15.280 I did the oil change once.

01:58:16.940 So.

01:58:18.400 What?

01:58:19.020 It's slightly different.

01:58:20.280 Come on now.

01:58:22.020 Although I will say,

01:58:23.160 uh,

01:58:23.620 one third of the decorations is now missing because of the cats.

01:58:27.400 We have what time is rage's interview at today?

01:58:29.960 He's got an interview.

01:58:30.820 That's right.

01:58:31.820 Oh,

01:58:32.280 does he?

01:58:33.260 Yeah.

01:58:33.660 Who's he on with today?

01:58:35.100 I can't remember.

01:58:36.900 Let me see.

01:58:37.660 Let me see if he.

01:58:39.800 It's hard now because he's not on Twitter.

01:58:42.000 So you got to rely on other people.

01:58:43.780 FWR.

01:58:45.340 So patriotic weekly review is live at 7 PM UK time.

01:58:50.120 So 3 PM Eastern.

01:58:52.020 Okay.

01:58:53.320 So in 15 minutes.

01:58:55.300 It was,

01:58:55.780 uh,

01:58:56.280 okay.

01:58:56.580 Now I know Tom.

01:58:58.800 Where'd Tom go?

01:59:01.640 He was here three minutes ago.

01:59:03.480 Yeah.

01:59:04.160 He requested.

01:59:05.380 I'm pretty sure I hit allow and now he's gone. 0.72

01:59:08.680 What the hell? 0.80

01:59:09.800 Yeah. 0.98

01:59:10.360 What are you doing,

01:59:11.040 Tom?

01:59:11.380 What are you doing,

01:59:11.920 Tom?

01:59:13.580 Unbelievable,

01:59:14.160 bud.

01:59:18.660 Uh,

01:59:19.380 link keeps sending me to play.

01:59:21.540 Oh,

01:59:21.820 that's cause you're on the phone.

01:59:23.080 That's why.

01:59:24.400 Yeah.

01:59:26.940 Yeah.

01:59:27.360 Sorry,

01:59:27.720 Tom using rumble studio,

01:59:28.880 bud.

01:59:29.580 That's why I got rid of it.

01:59:30.760 I just,

01:59:31.220 it's just not quite here yet.

01:59:32.680 I mean,

01:59:32.920 it works,

01:59:33.420 but there's some stuff that's limited,

01:59:36.120 but if you want to be able to stream to rumble for free,

01:59:38.020 then this is what you got to do.

01:59:39.900 Yeah.

01:59:40.220 Right.

01:59:40.940 So yeah,

01:59:41.220 I don't know.

01:59:41.740 I don't mind it.

01:59:42.820 Right.

01:59:43.340 But I'm going to,

01:59:45.100 I think we should,

01:59:46.840 yeah,

01:59:47.060 we'll upgrade it to the paid one so that we can do it on all the other ones as

01:59:51.080 well.

01:59:52.340 Yeah.

01:59:53.040 That's why I got stream yard.

01:59:55.100 Yeah.

01:59:55.960 I,

01:59:56.440 can we link it to my stream yard?

01:59:59.080 You should be able to.

02:00:00.400 Maybe.

02:00:01.160 I have no idea.

02:00:02.440 I've got stream yard.

02:00:03.460 Then why not?

02:00:04.640 I'm like stream yard doesn't matter right now.

02:00:06.660 It just depends on what you connect it to.

02:00:08.700 So you just put your API in for your rumble into your stream yard and then

02:00:13.160 it'll connect.

02:00:14.320 Okay.

02:00:15.260 Yeah.

02:00:15.620 Cause I guess I would just get the stream key from rumble,

02:00:17.860 send it to her and she could.

02:00:19.680 Yeah.

02:00:20.560 Yeah,

02:00:20.760 exactly.

02:00:21.220 Probably work.

02:00:21.980 Yeah.

02:00:22.340 I just,

02:00:22.800 I know that what I've found with rumble studio for whatever reason,

02:00:26.300 like if I use stream yard as an example and load up a file from my computer

02:00:31.180 and play it, 0.99

02:00:31.720 it's all fucking choppy and shit, 0.99

02:00:33.160 but I've had success with rumble where it isn't. 0.99

02:00:36.320 So that's why I just continue to use that.

02:00:39.220 The bit rates were different on them,

02:00:40.500 right?

02:00:41.220 Yeah.

02:00:41.540 It depends on,

02:00:42.300 it depends on your,

02:00:43.360 your bandwidth,

02:00:46.100 but you can,

02:00:47.300 you can make him an admin on your stream yard.

02:00:49.580 You can make Johnny an admin.

02:00:51.740 And then he can open it.

02:00:53.660 Then he can put in the API and the stream key and stuff.

02:00:59.000 We'll do that next time.

02:01:00.140 That's what I did with Friday.

02:01:01.220 Terry,

02:01:01.560 he gave him admin privileges on my stream yard.

02:01:04.180 So I'm going to go camping this weekend.

02:01:05.640 He's going to try and run my Sunday morning show.

02:01:07.700 So Friday,

02:01:09.880 Terry streaming on a Sunday.

02:01:12.980 Nice.

02:01:15.160 Okay.

02:01:15.560 I'm going to piece for two seconds so I can go make myself a drink before you

02:01:18.540 leave. 0.99

02:01:18.780 No problem.

02:01:19.580 Yep.

02:01:20.040 Good idea.

02:01:23.660 That's weird.

02:01:28.300 I don't understand why it wouldn't work on the computer.

02:01:34.040 Strange,

02:01:34.580 Tom.

02:01:35.200 Strange.

02:01:36.760 We'll,

02:01:37.040 we'll get it figured out at some point though.

02:01:41.980 What a stream now.

02:01:43.200 That's,

02:01:43.640 that's been a good one.

02:01:45.640 I almost feel like now we're going to,

02:01:47.040 now we're going to do a little jackassery a little bit anyway.

02:01:49.800 Well,

02:01:50.400 I felt a little bad,

02:01:51.320 but,

02:01:51.640 but coming in a little bit late,

02:01:53.780 but Paul Levine was having a special show this morning about homeschooling 0.98

02:01:58.860 and I had to stick around there and make sure there's no fucking trolls. 0.98

02:02:03.300 But see, 0.99

02:02:03.620 that's,

02:02:03.880 that's the thing that I do like though.

02:02:05.180 Like,

02:02:05.780 yes,

02:02:06.240 there are times where we have our kind of let loose streams or,

02:02:10.980 or,

02:02:11.620 you know, 0.99

02:02:12.120 let's fuck around and just tell some jokes and get some laughs and just not 0.99

02:02:16.180 really be all that serious. 0.98

02:02:17.160 But it's also nice when you do see things like a,

02:02:19.380 like a homeschooling stream or something like this,

02:02:22.240 or,

02:02:22.900 you know,

02:02:23.860 something where we can,

02:02:25.780 you know,

02:02:27.120 I mean,

02:02:27.480 not that we can't have a little fun with this,

02:02:29.520 but also really actually be serious,

02:02:32.200 be honest and,

02:02:33.580 and have conversations that are really needed to be had.

02:02:38.920 I think it goes a long way when,

02:02:40.760 when,

02:02:41.040 you know,

02:02:41.800 it's happened a couple of times and it seems to happen organically.

02:02:44.320 Like,

02:02:44.540 it doesn't seem like something you can plan.

02:02:46.640 I mean,

02:02:47.120 I guess you could plan it with nobody thinks to plan it,

02:02:49.280 but this,

02:02:51.380 these organic conversations that,

02:02:53.000 you know,

02:02:53.780 spring up on a three or four hour,

02:02:56.220 five hour podcast.

02:02:57.860 It's quite,

02:02:58.600 it's quite amazing.

02:02:59.280 And I,

02:02:59.580 I think it's,

02:03:00.240 I think it's something we all need to be doing.

02:03:03.280 Well,

02:03:03.740 and I absolutely agree.

02:03:05.880 Like it's funny.

02:03:08.200 And this,

02:03:09.040 like I said earlier,

02:03:09.900 when I was talking about when Sarah came to me with the idea that we would do a

02:03:13.700 stream together is what I really liked about it is,

02:03:17.560 is the fact that yes,

02:03:18.580 we do have this,

02:03:19.800 this flow of conversation. 0.98

02:03:22.340 And this is now two streams where we have had zero fucking plan. 0.98

02:03:28.200 Right. 0.96

02:03:29.120 None whatsoever.

02:03:29.980 It was literally just want to go live.

02:03:34.960 And that's it.

02:03:36.240 Well, 0.99

02:03:36.660 I think that's about every fucking stream pretty much. 0.99

02:03:39.260 I mean, 0.99

02:03:39.520 that we,

02:03:39.980 that we've done as a collective,

02:03:41.220 I mean,

02:03:41.540 between,

02:03:41.960 you know,

02:03:42.600 like,

02:03:42.900 uh,

02:03:44.460 Freestone streams the same way.

02:03:45.860 It's just kind of,

02:03:46.940 yeah,

02:03:49.220 it's kind of go.

02:03:50.180 No,

02:03:50.300 but I mean,

02:03:50.680 with,

02:03:50.920 with Freestones,

02:03:51.620 it's like,

02:03:52.560 yeah,

02:03:54.360 like it's obviously just a,

02:03:56.000 an impromptu,

02:03:57.000 just whenever.

02:03:58.180 Yeah.

02:03:58.460 Right.

02:03:58.860 Pub scene.

02:03:59.340 Um,

02:03:59.820 but typically it does kind of go more towards that,

02:04:02.740 that sense of humor,

02:04:04.560 that,

02:04:04.980 that kind of screwing around and just kind of letting off some steam.

02:04:07.860 Whereas what I like about these is that it's,

02:04:11.620 and I mean,

02:04:12.880 we've done it on your stream as well, 0.56

02:04:14.440 where it can just go into a really fucking serious topic and we can go from 0.82

02:04:21.360 there. 0.98

02:04:21.640 Right.

02:04:22.460 And,

02:04:22.940 and yes,

02:04:23.500 well,

02:04:23.780 mama,

02:04:23.980 it is,

02:04:24.520 it's a new show.

02:04:25.180 This is like episode two,

02:04:26.400 basically.

02:04:27.320 Um,

02:04:27.720 it is.

02:04:28.260 Yeah.

02:04:28.440 Well,

02:04:29.360 maybe we'll work out this morning.

02:04:31.120 If you count the fuck up this morning,

02:04:32.320 it's episode three.

02:04:33.680 Yeah,

02:04:34.060 that's true.

02:04:34.980 Um, 0.98

02:04:35.460 but maybe like potentially we'll work out an actual like fucking, 0.98

02:04:39.540 um, 0.98

02:04:41.420 time slot.

02:04:42.180 Schedule.

02:04:43.400 Yeah.

02:04:43.920 Right now it's just been kind of whenever we kind of feel like it.

02:04:47.660 Um,

02:04:48.120 but I'm,

02:04:49.020 I'm very,

02:04:49.880 very happy with the,

02:04:51.520 with the way it goes though.

02:04:53.180 Right.

02:04:53.580 Like,

02:04:54.440 yeah.

02:04:57.420 Yeah.

02:04:58.160 I think one of the big,

02:04:59.340 I think one of the best things to make sure that it's happening as when

02:05:02.260 you're running the stream is to make sure that,

02:05:04.500 uh,

02:05:05.780 there's no talking over people.

02:05:08.080 Cause that's,

02:05:08.720 it's really frustrating.

02:05:09.680 And I,

02:05:10.000 I get that sometimes on other streams where,

02:05:12.140 or there's somebody who's on the stream and they just have so much 0.97

02:05:14.260 fucking background noise that you can't, 0.98

02:05:17.040 you can't hear. 1.00

02:05:17.880 Right.

02:05:18.640 That's really frustrating.

02:05:19.660 You don't want to kick them off,

02:05:21.020 but it's like, 1.00

02:05:21.520 Holy fuck, 1.00

02:05:22.100 man, 1.00

02:05:22.300 mute yourself or.

02:05:24.600 Well,

02:05:25.020 especially the,

02:05:25.720 the talking over.

02:05:26.720 Right.

02:05:26.960 Like,

02:05:27.260 and,

02:05:27.620 and I really see it,

02:05:28.920 uh,

02:05:29.260 like on Twitter spaces as an example,

02:05:31.140 where it's like a lot of people will just unmute themselves and start

02:05:34.560 talking all at the same time.

02:05:35.720 And it's like,

02:05:36.080 I can't hear any of you.

02:05:38.380 Right.

02:05:39.060 So,

02:05:40.020 um,

02:05:40.440 it is nice to,

02:05:41.620 to be able to have that kind of rapport and that kind of,

02:05:44.560 I guess the chemistry really is what it is,

02:05:47.380 uh,

02:05:48.200 to be able to do these things.

02:05:49.660 And,

02:05:49.960 and not sit here and stomp on each other and,

02:05:52.580 and what have you.

02:05:54.340 Yeah.

02:05:55.340 And I think it's important too,

02:05:56.660 because the conversations that,

02:05:59.020 um,

02:06:00.000 you know,

02:06:00.280 like we had today,

02:06:01.120 those are conversations where it's important for people to have an

02:06:06.800 opportunity to be heard and to not be interrupted and to be able to,

02:06:11.840 you know,

02:06:12.220 again,

02:06:12.960 this is sort of,

02:06:14.540 it,

02:06:14.560 the intention wasn't obviously to go to these places.

02:06:19.720 However,

02:06:20.120 when the conversations do go here,

02:06:21.800 I think it's important to not have people talking over each other and to

02:06:25.180 be able to be able to feel like they're heard.

02:06:28.040 Right.

02:06:28.860 Sometimes I think it's just that there's some,

02:06:30.780 some people have a delay and they don't,

02:06:33.080 they don't know that you've started talking or if they're not watching the

02:06:35.680 screen,

02:06:36.000 because I mean,

02:06:36.780 you can see visual cues of people talking,

02:06:38.600 but if for whatever reason,

02:06:40.840 if maybe say I'm stalled and I'm in the middle of a conversation,

02:06:44.680 I don't even know that I'm stalled out.

02:06:47.340 And then,

02:06:48.000 then I come back in and I've been talking over top to somebody else because

02:06:51.000 they didn't think I was even on there.

02:06:52.580 Right.

02:06:52.980 So it's not perfect,

02:06:55.160 but it's definitely important to have a respect for other people's when

02:07:01.060 they're talking.

02:07:02.120 Absolutely.

02:07:03.280 Um,

02:07:04.000 and,

02:07:04.360 and well,

02:07:04.860 and especially in these topics too,

02:07:06.340 right?

02:07:06.540 Like Sarah's right.

02:07:07.520 It's the idea of being heard.

02:07:09.800 Um,

02:07:10.260 and it's also nice too though,

02:07:11.580 because I do feel that,

02:07:12.940 uh,

02:07:14.300 each of us has something to add here.

02:07:16.520 Right.

02:07:17.020 It's not like nobody's just kind of on,

02:07:20.080 on this panel to just be here,

02:07:21.880 but we all actually do have something that we can add that is constructive

02:07:25.900 and productive.

02:07:28.280 No,

02:07:28.800 except for me.

02:07:30.100 Yeah.

02:07:31.360 I would disagree.

02:07:32.900 I'm just a pretty face.

02:07:35.080 Yeah.

02:07:35.520 Right.

02:07:36.020 I thought that's why Johnny was here.

02:07:37.520 I would love to consider myself the pretty face.

02:07:43.340 Nice.

02:07:43.980 Maybe the pretty hair.

02:07:45.420 That's Johnny.

02:07:46.100 Johnny's just here for the happy endings.

02:07:50.380 One day when you pass out from being so tired,

02:07:54.460 we're going to cut your hair.

02:07:56.420 Never.

02:07:58.520 Never.

02:07:59.300 I wouldn't do that.

02:08:00.760 Never,

02:08:01.380 never,

02:08:01.680 never.

02:08:02.060 Shave the,

02:08:02.560 shave the eyebrows and cut the hair.

02:08:04.240 Oh boy.

02:08:06.160 What is this?

02:08:07.100 Hold on.

02:08:11.640 When the phone rings,

02:08:14.620 you know,

02:08:14.880 it's,

02:08:15.100 it's never good.

02:08:18.540 I hate, 1.00

02:08:19.180 I hate my fucking phone, 1.00

02:08:20.300 man. 1.00

02:08:21.120 Yeah.

02:08:21.500 I have two of them.

02:08:22.280 So I could totally live without it.

02:08:24.700 Yep.

02:08:25.060 A hundred percent.

02:08:25.760 It's the only thing I needed for is to talk to my kids.

02:08:29.080 Really?

02:08:29.980 Yeah.

02:08:31.400 Yeah.

02:08:31.840 I,

02:08:32.140 uh,

02:08:32.500 I've been seriously considering going back to a home phone and only using my,

02:08:38.720 don't you feel like that's a loss to you?

02:08:40.620 Like,

02:08:41.160 I mean,

02:08:42.480 it's just,

02:08:42.980 it's a step backwards.

02:08:43.980 We got rid of our home phones for a reason because they were convenient to have a cell

02:08:48.520 phone.

02:08:50.020 Yeah.

02:08:50.340 But you know what?

02:08:50.960 I don't answer my phone when I'm driving.

02:08:53.560 I don't generally,

02:08:54.800 you know,

02:08:55.140 like,

02:08:55.840 it's not like I take phone calls when I'm at the gym or,

02:08:59.240 you know,

02:08:59.680 like,

02:08:59.960 I feel like it's,

02:09:00.820 I don't know.

02:09:01.960 Like I can wait till I get home usually.

02:09:03.780 Cause that's usually where I'm having phone conversations,

02:09:05.860 but I don't know.

02:09:07.800 So I mostly use my phone for using the internet.

02:09:10.620 Yeah.

02:09:14.460 It's funny.

02:09:15.100 I'll be looking at Twitter on this screen.

02:09:17.060 I'll have telegram on this screen and I'll pick up my phone and look at Twitter and telegram.

02:09:21.800 Really?

02:09:22.900 Yeah. 1.00

02:09:23.540 Fucking stupid. 1.00

02:09:25.320 Yeah. 1.00

02:09:25.580 See,

02:09:25.820 I'm not on Twitter or Facebook or anything like that.

02:09:27.980 So,

02:09:28.260 and I use Instagram to talk to a couple of my friends from like,

02:09:33.360 that I grew up with that I've known for like 45 years.

02:09:36.840 So other than that,

02:09:38.640 and I look at recipes,

02:09:40.260 that's another thing I do.

02:09:42.460 I,

02:09:42.640 I,

02:09:43.080 I watch YouTube.

02:09:45.200 I,

02:09:45.400 I'll admit, 0.98

02:09:45.900 I do watch YouTube and I fucking love Sam, 0.97

02:09:48.080 the cooking guy. 0.83

02:09:48.760 And I get all kinds of inspiration from different cooking shows and whatnot.

02:09:53.380 So,

02:09:53.660 yeah,

02:09:55.860 I,

02:09:56.320 um,

02:09:57.420 the one thing,

02:09:58.100 like,

02:09:58.380 cause I don't watch TV.

02:10:00.260 So for me,

02:10:01.580 I'm like,

02:10:02.480 I like the quick sort of,

02:10:05.380 because I know how to make things.

02:10:06.700 So for me,

02:10:07.460 it's like,

02:10:07.920 I just,

02:10:08.320 I'll look at a recipe or I'll look at something being made and I'll be like,

02:10:11.200 okay,

02:10:11.400 I can make that,

02:10:12.540 you know?

02:10:13.660 So I kind of scroll through for things like that.

02:10:15.960 And real estate.

02:10:17.560 That's the other thing I look at on social media is real estate.

02:10:21.620 I mean,

02:10:21.860 my algorithm basically shows me real estate all over Europe and recipes.

02:10:27.980 So that's what I get.

02:10:30.220 I'm not tomorrow,

02:10:36.080 but I've always been looking at,

02:10:38.380 at real estate,

02:10:39.340 um,

02:10:40.240 in places like Sweden and stuff like that to,

02:10:45.760 uh,

02:10:46.160 go and explore as a student to go over there.

02:10:51.100 Germany is also another place that you can go very easily as an international

02:10:55.980 student. 1.00

02:10:57.360 So you'll get raped and killed. 1.00

02:10:59.880 Yeah. 1.00

02:11:00.220 I don't want to go and get raped. 0.99

02:11:05.160 Oh no, 1.00

02:11:05.800 no,

02:11:05.880 no.

02:11:06.720 I feel like the chances of that happening are just as high here because of,

02:11:11.480 you know, 0.96

02:11:12.380 the fact that we're just allowing everybody and fucking uncle Kenny with the 0.98

02:11:17.020 big $5 super jam. 0.98

02:11:18.800 Absolutely.

02:11:19.720 Thank you.

02:11:20.360 Uncle Kenny.

02:11:21.300 Appreciate it.

02:11:22.580 I don't know why you hate that guy so much,

02:11:24.140 Johnny.

02:11:24.400 I think he's pretty cool. 1.00

02:11:25.240 He's such a dick. 1.00

02:11:32.600 I love it. 1.00

02:11:33.960 All right.

02:11:34.900 All right.

02:11:35.540 I'm going to run.

02:11:36.880 I got to go and get Connor,

02:11:37.940 but if you guys,

02:11:38.560 uh,

02:11:39.000 want to hold it down,

02:11:40.120 I will be back.

02:11:41.420 Okay.

02:11:42.380 All right.

02:11:42.740 Um,

02:11:43.120 apparently he got beat up by a girl today. 1.00

02:11:46.760 Oh shit. 1.00

02:11:47.560 That's what that phone call was. 1.00

02:11:49.520 Oh,

02:11:50.060 uh,

02:11:50.520 apparently he got slapped by some girl in grade one.

02:11:54.180 Did he hit her back?

02:11:55.700 No,

02:11:56.360 no.

02:11:57.180 Um,

02:11:57.700 but she slapped him and he got a bloody nose apparently. 1.00

02:12:01.140 Uh,

02:12:02.300 well,

02:12:02.680 he got humbled today.

02:12:03.620 So that's a good conversation to have.

02:12:05.720 Time to have that. 0.99

02:12:06.600 Don't grab people's asses. 1.00

02:12:07.920 Fucking conversation. 1.00

02:12:08.580 You know what? 1.00

02:12:09.060 I think it's the other way around.

02:12:10.680 I think it's the other way around because allegedly,

02:12:13.140 uh,

02:12:13.720 the school just told me as well.

02:12:15.540 Um,

02:12:16.080 that Connor has told the school that she's also kissed him on the cheek before.

02:12:21.720 And he didn't tell anybody.

02:12:23.940 So I think.

02:12:25.120 How much you want to bet she doesn't have a dad at home.

02:12:28.140 Maybe.

02:12:28.980 Well,

02:12:29.400 this is the school for that.

02:12:30.620 I will say that this is definitely the school for that.

02:12:34.460 Um,

02:12:35.020 but yeah,

02:12:36.260 so I'm going to pick them up and make fun of them.

02:12:39.000 Um,

02:12:39.700 it's going to be fun.

02:12:40.980 I'm going to ask him if he wants to switch in music the whole way home.

02:12:43.920 So.

02:12:47.000 I will be back.

02:12:49.160 Yeah.

02:12:50.100 Obviously you can link to you if you want to send it to anybody.

02:12:53.500 Yeah,

02:12:53.640 well you can't because you're on presentation.

02:12:55.200 You're in the,

02:12:55.660 you're in the hot seat.

02:12:57.200 So you're an admin though.

02:12:58.700 Are you not?

02:12:59.700 But not in,

02:13:00.440 no,

02:13:00.620 not in here.

02:13:01.720 I'm not.

02:13:02.480 Am I an admin?

02:13:04.240 I should be.

02:13:05.020 Oh,

02:13:05.200 you can make it.

02:13:06.060 Oh,

02:13:06.240 right.

02:13:06.360 You got to make somebody in admin.

02:13:07.600 That's right.

02:13:08.520 You go into,

02:13:09.240 uh,

02:13:09.560 invite participants and then you'll say them.

02:13:12.120 Yep.

02:13:12.400 There you go.

02:13:14.060 There's one.

02:13:14.820 There you go.

02:13:16.800 And.

02:13:17.480 Oh yeah.

02:13:17.840 It's working.

02:13:18.840 Yeah.

02:13:19.400 Two.

02:13:20.400 Yeah.

02:13:20.920 Yeah.

02:13:21.240 There you go.

02:13:21.940 There you go.

02:13:22.500 Thank you.

02:13:22.920 That's the nice thing about that is the nice thing about rumbles.

02:13:25.220 You can do that.

02:13:26.100 It's easy.

02:13:26.840 Well,

02:13:27.160 you can walk away because like on streamer,

02:13:29.180 and if you walk away, 0.97

02:13:30.020 nobody can fucking do anything. 0.98

02:13:31.780 Oh, 0.99

02:13:32.200 right.

02:13:32.860 Cause they have to learn from Chris.

02:13:34.620 Yeah.

02:13:35.100 All right.

02:13:35.580 All right.

02:13:35.980 At least do it.

02:13:36.600 If you want to know what he said to her,

02:13:38.400 I'm going to go find out.

02:13:39.560 I'll be back in like 20 minutes to a half hour.

02:13:41.800 Get the story.

02:13:42.760 Yes.

02:13:43.040 And I will,

02:13:44.080 I will,

02:13:44.500 I might even try and bring him on to explain.

02:13:49.200 We'll see if that works out,

02:13:50.500 but I'll be back.

02:13:51.820 Okay.

02:13:52.340 Good luck.

02:13:53.980 So I just had an idea.

02:13:56.120 How about this?

02:13:57.200 We,

02:13:57.500 we team up in you.

02:13:59.820 Okay.

02:14:00.680 We,

02:14:01.120 we,

02:14:01.400 we write a recipe.

02:14:02.420 We have to do two parts,

02:14:03.340 but we write a recipe.

02:14:04.620 And so we already have all the ingredients for the recipe.

02:14:07.540 And then you cook,

02:14:08.800 you cook one meal and I cook your meal,

02:14:11.980 right?

02:14:12.160 You cook my meal.

02:14:13.040 I cook your meal at the same time during the stream.

02:14:15.860 And then at the end,

02:14:16.760 we present our plates and see who's,

02:14:18.980 who wins right by audience.

02:14:21.700 It's like top chef,

02:14:23.340 but like top chef day one.

02:14:25.340 Top bigot, 0.95

02:14:25.920 bigot chef.

02:14:27.160 There we go.

02:14:28.720 All right.

02:14:29.520 I'm down.

02:14:30.920 How,

02:14:31.440 how comfortable are you?

02:14:34.040 Very comfortable.

02:14:35.860 Like I can give you any recipe.

02:14:37.860 I have 13 pieces of cast iron cookware in my oven right now.

02:14:43.120 All right.

02:14:43.820 Okay.

02:14:44.260 Four different thermometers,

02:14:45.460 laser probes.

02:14:47.360 Uh,

02:14:48.020 what else do I have?

02:14:49.740 Do you,

02:14:50.440 do you have a specific,

02:14:51.500 like what kind of cooking do you like the most?

02:14:55.220 Um,

02:14:55.900 meat,

02:14:57.140 but,

02:14:57.660 uh,

02:14:58.580 yeah.

02:14:59.600 Okay.

02:15:00.000 All right.

02:15:01.860 I don't know.

02:15:02.580 Like tonight I'm,

02:15:03.380 I got,

02:15:03.700 I just took out three chicken breasts,

02:15:05.300 so I don't know what I'm going to make with that.

02:15:06.580 Yep.

02:15:06.820 But have you ever made a shot over your aunt?

02:15:10.620 No, 0.99

02:15:11.420 I'm not fucking that good. 0.98

02:15:12.500 Come on. 0.99

02:15:12.840 Ooh,

02:15:15.500 hail's kitchen.

02:15:16.300 Ooh,

02:15:16.520 I like that one.

02:15:17.300 Yes.

02:15:17.920 Yes.

02:15:18.820 Yeah.

02:15:19.600 That's good.

02:15:20.300 Nine.

02:15:21.500 Right.

02:15:23.200 I can wear my sweater.

02:15:26.640 I should get you one of the sweaters.

02:15:29.040 Yeah.

02:15:30.860 Well,

02:15:31.360 I've got it.

02:15:31.820 I've got an apron.

02:15:33.620 So I'm,

02:15:34.420 I'm good there.

02:15:35.820 Okay.

02:15:36.080 Well,

02:15:36.260 I was, 0.99

02:15:36.600 I was wearing my apron and I got shit from, 0.98

02:15:38.720 I think it was actually Johnny rotten. 0.99

02:15:40.140 He called me a fag for wearing an apron. 0.96

02:15:42.780 I have all different kinds of aprons. 0.97

02:15:45.440 That's the best part about being in the kitchen.

02:15:47.840 Getting to pick your apron for the day.

02:15:50.020 I got a nice thick,

02:15:50.940 my wife got it for me,

02:15:51.900 a nice thick denim.

02:15:52.820 It's like really heavy denim.

02:15:54.380 I like it.

02:15:55.500 Yeah.

02:15:55.760 I only really wear it when I'm using something with flour.

02:15:58.380 Cause I hate,

02:15:58.760 I always get flour all over me.

02:16:00.020 Right.

02:16:00.260 So.

02:16:00.520 Well,

02:16:00.640 I always wipe my hands and I always,

02:16:02.080 I always have stuff in the front of my apron.

02:16:04.900 Well, 0.98

02:16:05.220 cause when you have boobs, 1.00

02:16:06.120 you can like put stuff underneath it, 0.96

02:16:07.800 like recipes and stuff.

02:16:09.940 Wooden spoons, 1.00

02:16:11.160 fucking spatulas. 1.00

02:16:12.280 A hundred percent. 1.00

02:16:12.840 Just shove those in there. 0.99

02:16:14.360 Where the fuck's that roll of paper towel? 0.99

02:16:15.980 Oh, 0.99

02:16:16.160 here it is.

02:16:18.440 Yeah.

02:16:18.820 We can put all kinds of things like beer,

02:16:20.940 like beer bottles,

02:16:21.920 all kinds of stuff in our,

02:16:22.980 in our cleavage.

02:16:24.380 I remember doing that in the nineties when we used to like sneak booze into

02:16:27.520 bars.

02:16:29.860 And clubs and stuff.

02:16:30.940 And we used to put like 26ers in our bras. 1.00

02:16:34.560 Like what?

02:16:35.180 Is it a block bag or something?

02:16:36.580 Or just a.

02:16:37.080 No,

02:16:37.260 like you like a bottle, 1.00

02:16:38.800 like you just shoved a bottle of fricking Smirnoff underneath the tits. 1.00

02:16:42.720 Fucking hilarious. 1.00

02:16:44.360 Oh my God. 0.98

02:16:44.880 Those days. 0.99

02:16:47.480 We used to do bad shit when we were teenagers, 0.99

02:16:49.460 man. 0.99

02:16:50.940 But there was no cell phones then.

02:16:53.080 So there was no,

02:16:54.260 you know,

02:16:54.980 thank God.

02:16:58.440 I know. 1.00

02:16:59.440 Fuck. 1.00

02:17:00.100 All we had was Polaroids. 1.00

02:17:01.500 So can you imagine how different?

02:17:03.080 Yeah.

02:17:03.300 We had those little disposable cameras. 0.97

02:17:04.920 Just we'd take them to a party and pass them around and shit. 0.99

02:17:07.220 But. 0.95

02:17:07.980 And then how embarrassing was it to go and have to pick up the pictures?

02:17:11.640 When you had to go and get them.

02:17:12.540 You didn't even know what was on there.

02:17:15.220 The person looks at you and giving you back the pictures and they're like,

02:17:19.680 Oh,

02:17:20.820 Tom wants in good.

02:17:22.100 You know, 0.99

02:17:22.440 they gave you a total shit and you're like, 1.00

02:17:24.820 Oh, 1.00

02:17:25.440 they're bad.

02:17:26.040 And the person taking your money is like,

02:17:28.340 you should be ashamed of yourself.

02:17:30.260 And you're like,

02:17:30.760 well,

02:17:31.260 these are going to be great.

02:17:32.380 Or they're giving you a little wink.

02:17:33.900 Oh yeah.

02:17:34.500 That's pretty good.

02:17:35.740 Yeah,

02:17:35.980 totally.

02:17:36.340 That was the other thing.

02:17:37.060 When you wanted to do like nudies of yourself and take like old school nudies,

02:17:40.440 you had to like take them with a camera and then go and get them developed.

02:17:43.680 For real.

02:17:45.240 I mean,

02:17:45.560 that's funny.

02:17:46.020 I like this one.

02:17:47.240 White gooey kitchen.

02:17:48.640 Ooh.

02:17:50.120 That's good too.

02:17:50.900 Hey Tom.

02:17:52.180 Hey guys.

02:17:52.760 How's it going?

02:17:53.600 Good.

02:17:53.840 Better figured out.

02:17:54.400 Yeah.

02:17:55.880 I don't know what the hell was going on.

02:17:57.380 I had to reach every time I went to join it because for some reason,

02:18:00.460 this particular app won't work on my Chromebook.

02:18:04.360 Right.

02:18:04.640 So I like,

02:18:06.080 I'll put everything in there,

02:18:06.960 my name, 0.98

02:18:07.380 all that crap, 0.79

02:18:07.980 and then I'll hit join and then I'll get like a green screen, 0.95

02:18:11.120 like this black letter writing across the bottom of it.

02:18:13.400 It won't let me join it.

02:18:14.840 And so I have to use the book.

02:18:17.020 What's that?

02:18:17.640 It's firewalled on the Chromebook.

02:18:20.100 Yeah,

02:18:20.360 probably.

02:18:20.980 You should try using a brave browser.

02:18:22.900 It'll,

02:18:23.540 I have that.

02:18:24.000 I have a Chromebook as well that I use for other things.

02:18:30.320 And yeah,

02:18:31.580 definitely there's a lot of things that are firewalled on it.

02:18:33.620 You have to use a,

02:18:34.540 like an alternative browser and go through the back door for stuff.

02:18:37.880 Oh,

02:18:38.480 otherwise it blocks.

02:18:40.020 Yeah.

02:18:41.300 Okay.

02:18:41.780 I see.

02:18:42.280 I see.

02:18:42.780 But the weird thing was on my phone and this is actually not the first time

02:18:46.300 this has happened.

02:18:46.900 I go to hit the link and it sends me to the play store on the phone app.

02:18:51.160 I'm just like,

02:18:51.620 yeah.

02:18:52.000 And I'm just like, 0.71

02:18:53.800 what the hell? 0.88

02:18:55.460 Yeah. 0.95

02:18:55.900 Well,

02:18:55.940 it wants to download the studios app.

02:18:57.620 Oh yeah.

02:18:59.340 Yeah.

02:18:59.940 Yeah.

02:19:00.180 So I have the studios app on my phone,

02:19:01.700 but it still just told me to download what the hell was going on.

02:19:03.740 So I just restarted my phone and Johnny's resend the link.

02:19:07.460 And so what's this?

02:19:08.320 That works.

02:19:09.320 Sweet.

02:19:10.260 Yeah.

02:19:10.940 But,

02:19:11.260 I just want to say quick,

02:19:12.560 that stream you guys did today, 0.94

02:19:14.600 this stream was fucking awesome. 0.86

02:19:16.700 Awesome. 0.96

02:19:17.220 That was a good one.

02:19:18.140 Like,

02:19:18.440 like I said to Johnny in the message,

02:19:19.860 man, 1.00

02:19:20.000 you guys hit me right in fucking heart. 1.00

02:19:21.480 Like, 0.99

02:19:21.780 you guys are awesome.

02:19:23.680 And,

02:19:24.860 a lot of the stuff you guys are talking about,

02:19:28.740 I've actually experienced myself to a different degree.

02:19:34.040 Like,

02:19:34.220 like my mother's awesome.

02:19:36.920 Right.

02:19:37.100 Like,

02:19:37.260 I've always had a good mother.

02:19:38.200 Like,

02:19:38.320 we've had our ups and downs and stuff like that,

02:19:39.860 but like,

02:19:40.520 she's always been awesome.

02:19:41.800 Right.

02:19:42.900 But I didn't know my father until I was about 39 years old.

02:19:47.000 And so that has a lot to do.

02:19:50.460 It has a lot to do with like,

02:19:52.500 just how you walk through your life out,

02:19:55.980 like during all that time period.

02:19:57.240 Right.

02:19:57.760 And like,

02:19:58.660 and like,

02:19:59.440 and my mom did her best.

02:20:00.920 Like,

02:20:01.060 it's nothing against my mother,

02:20:02.200 like,

02:20:02.380 or anything like that.

02:20:03.080 But my mom did her best.

02:20:03.740 And like,

02:20:05.580 so the way I see it,

02:20:06.540 it's like we had,

02:20:07.060 I had standing.

02:20:08.380 Right.

02:20:08.960 And a couple of them weren't so good.

02:20:10.620 And the two that are,

02:20:12.220 were good.

02:20:13.040 One's dead now.

02:20:14.440 And dropped dead of a heart attack of 42 years old.

02:20:16.980 And the other one's currently married to my mother right now.

02:20:19.760 But when I was listening to everybody talk about talking and everything like,

02:20:25.440 like it's,

02:20:26.540 it hit pretty close to home with a lot of stuff.

02:20:28.600 So like,

02:20:29.620 I didn't grow up in a household where it was alcohol ramped or drug use ramped or anything like that.

02:20:33.720 So I was lucky in that aspect.

02:20:36.040 But,

02:20:36.520 but living with somebody was mentioning something about their mother's past and how that affected how things like that.

02:20:45.900 And so that's kind of the situation when it was,

02:20:49.180 when it came to like my family,

02:20:51.120 like my mother was dealing with issues from one of her childhood and stuff like that.

02:20:55.100 Cause she might like,

02:20:56.160 when my mother was a baby,

02:20:57.640 she was basically put on the kitchen table and her mother and father decided which one of them is going to take her.

02:21:04.540 And,

02:21:04.820 uh,

02:21:05.040 so it was, 0.94

02:21:05.880 it's broken homes and divorce and shit like that. 1.00

02:21:10.940 Fucks up people. 1.00

02:21:12.300 Like you wouldn't fucking, 1.00

02:21:13.340 and I understand it's like, 0.99

02:21:14.360 right.

02:21:15.540 But like,

02:21:16.040 um,

02:21:17.120 and so me personally,

02:21:19.820 I had,

02:21:20.440 uh,

02:21:20.640 I had quite the journey I had to take with some things.

02:21:22.680 Like,

02:21:22.980 um,

02:21:23.320 I got a little bit into the drug abuse,

02:21:25.320 started going down bad roads, 1.00

02:21:27.180 like fucking gang garbage, 1.00

02:21:28.640 all kinds of crap like that. 1.00

02:21:30.600 And, 0.99

02:21:31.180 uh,

02:21:31.940 it wasn't until I almost,

02:21:33.520 uh, 0.94

02:21:33.740 almost accidentally killed myself on pills is when I really had to fucking really take a, 0.98

02:21:37.900 a deep, 0.96

02:21:38.780 dark look into what,

02:21:39.740 uh,

02:21:40.320 where my life was going on that period of time.

02:21:42.840 And,

02:21:43.320 uh,

02:21:43.500 so I've had many changes since then,

02:21:44.980 and there was some ups and downs since then.

02:21:46.840 But the one thing that helped me the most is when I found my father.

02:21:50.880 After I found my father and got the look in that man's eyes,

02:21:56.940 because like,

02:21:57.800 I'm not going to get into the situation when it came to my mother and father.

02:22:00.400 Um,

02:22:00.720 it was kind of similar to your stage,

02:22:02.940 but not the same.

02:22:04.120 Um,

02:22:04.540 but once I looked into the eyes of my father and that connection was made,

02:22:09.880 everything came.

02:22:10.780 and,

02:22:12.340 and so that right there,

02:22:14.000 I,

02:22:14.220 I,

02:22:14.620 I,

02:22:15.180 I live with that and I have like every day,

02:22:17.960 but there was a couple of things I mentioned in the chatter about helping other people.

02:22:23.200 Um,

02:22:23.680 a friend of mine years ago,

02:22:26.000 he was,

02:22:26.420 uh,

02:22:26.720 quite the,

02:22:27.260 quite the dust knows.

02:22:28.320 He loved cocaine and it was,

02:22:30.100 he was already a very,

02:22:31.080 he already had a very addictive personality.

02:22:32.900 He's a hothead.

02:22:33.760 He's the type of guy that if you looked at him funny, 1.00

02:22:35.640 he was throwing a fucking ass straight at there, 1.00

02:22:37.380 like just not right. 0.99

02:22:39.880 And so he used to come over to my place and he jammed because he was my guitar player,

02:22:43.480 bass player and the whole band out with him.

02:22:45.440 And,

02:22:45.820 uh,

02:22:46.360 and he started,

02:22:46.920 he'd pull it out.

02:22:47.620 I'm just like,

02:22:48.740 dude, 1.00

02:22:49.500 you got to kick this shit. 1.00

02:22:50.680 And he's like, 1.00

02:22:50.980 I know,

02:22:51.400 I know.

02:22:51.780 I know.

02:22:51.980 And it got to the point where I was looking at him and I was like,

02:22:54.520 you can see it's eating this guy up.

02:22:56.920 And so I basically,

02:22:58.000 what I do is I take him out for rides and go for smoke and stuff like that.

02:23:00.720 I take him out for rides.

02:23:01.560 I used to call it my,

02:23:02.340 uh,

02:23:02.500 heavy metal Saturday,

02:23:03.560 uh,

02:23:03.780 cigarette tour.

02:23:05.100 And,

02:23:05.480 uh,

02:23:05.660 so we, 0.99

02:23:06.000 we go to the local linear reserve cranking heavy metal and shooting shit. 0.99

02:23:09.240 Right. 0.99

02:23:09.440 And so what I was trying to,

02:23:10.540 so I ended up basically helping by helping talking to this guy,

02:23:13.660 I managed to get him off the cold.

02:23:15.520 And so he's clean now,

02:23:16.820 which is a good thing.

02:23:18.200 Um,

02:23:18.520 he just actually lost his dad last December,

02:23:20.580 which sucks, 1.00

02:23:21.200 but he's off the shit. 1.00

02:23:22.600 Right. 1.00

02:23:23.460 And another comment I made,

02:23:24.900 um,

02:23:25.920 years ago,

02:23:27.300 I was asked to help a friend of ours,

02:23:30.180 his 15 year old grandson.

02:23:32.560 And this kid was heavily,

02:23:34.120 heavily involved in the street cats down in the,

02:23:36.280 down in the,

02:23:36.900 the GTA area.

02:23:39.700 And,

02:23:40.180 uh,

02:23:40.420 so this kid's mother,

02:23:42.420 uh,

02:23:43.100 moved him out of the area and moved him up North.

02:23:46.140 And,

02:23:46.680 uh, 0.99

02:23:47.220 and I was asked directly because I knew of my past and the shit that I was involved 0.89

02:23:50.800 in, 0.97

02:23:51.180 how I managed to get away from things. 0.99

02:23:53.180 So I was asked directly to help this fucking kid get away from stuff. 0.99

02:23:56.780 And, 0.99

02:23:57.220 uh,

02:23:57.700 so I would talk with this kid and we talked about everything.

02:23:59.860 I'd ask him like,

02:24:00.740 what,

02:24:00.940 what,

02:24:01.380 what's his role?

02:24:02.400 Like what he does,

02:24:03.380 things like this,

02:24:04.140 like everything.

02:24:04.760 Right.

02:24:05.380 And then I'd start telling him like,

02:24:06.760 these people,

02:24:07.420 they're not your friends.

02:24:09.100 And I tell him straight up.

02:24:10.420 Right.

02:24:10.640 And so I was getting,

02:24:12.300 I was getting places with this guy.

02:24:14.020 I was getting there.

02:24:14.680 I almost had this kid out. 1.00

02:24:17.180 And then a lot of these fucking local fucking gangster morons took the kid out. 1.00

02:24:22.020 And he drowned him murdered, 1.00

02:24:25.720 killed him. 0.99

02:24:27.040 And, 0.99

02:24:27.520 uh,

02:24:27.700 I live with that every day because I was about probably less than a week away from actually

02:24:32.060 having this kid out of that life. 1.00

02:24:34.080 And he ends up getting fucking murdered and drowned, 1.00

02:24:36.580 beaten up and drowned. 1.00

02:24:37.800 And so that's been,

02:24:41.240 that eats away at me quite a bit.

02:24:43.120 And,

02:24:43.340 uh,

02:24:43.560 so I,

02:24:44.700 when I see things like that,

02:24:45.940 or I see like young kids and I see gang violence and stuff like that, 0.99

02:24:48.720 that hits me directly close to fucking home. 0.87

02:24:50.800 And I had to get that off my chest because it's not too many people I've been able to talk to that about and, 0.96

02:24:57.780 uh, 0.86

02:24:58.100 and not understand the fucking anguish that people can go through through even trying to help other people. 0.99

02:25:04.600 Right. 0.99

02:25:06.240 Especially when,

02:25:07.060 uh,

02:25:07.560 you're young like that.

02:25:08.600 15 years old.

02:25:09.900 Yeah.

02:25:10.300 Impressional.

02:25:10.920 Like the kid had his whole life.

02:25:12.760 I had a whole life.

02:25:15.200 Yeah.

02:25:15.820 So things like that get hard.

02:25:18.680 One thing I've,

02:25:19.640 I've really learned.

02:25:21.580 Is a pain shared is pain lessened.

02:25:23.900 Right. 0.99

02:25:24.460 When you can talk about what's hurting for whatever fucking reason, 0.98

02:25:27.860 all of a sudden it doesn't have as much pull or power on you. 0.98

02:25:30.820 Right.

02:25:31.560 When I started talking about,

02:25:33.000 you know,

02:25:33.300 I had sexual abuse when I was a child and I didn't even, 0.99

02:25:36.580 I had blocked it out for so many fucking years. 0.99

02:25:39.640 And it wasn't, 0.98

02:25:40.600 it wasn't until like the last five or six years where I'd come to terms with it.

02:25:44.440 And I realized that,

02:25:45.820 you know, 0.99

02:25:46.000 I was fucking six years old. 0.99

02:25:48.580 I didn't know what the fuck was going on and I wasn't responsible for it. 0.99

02:25:52.620 You know, 0.98

02:25:53.100 and that's probably why I'm so fucking, 0.97

02:25:54.600 you know, 0.96

02:25:55.720 vehemently, 1.00

02:25:56.440 I fucking hate pedophiles and, 1.00

02:25:59.680 and I hate seeing kids being taken advantage of. 1.00

02:26:02.700 And I hate seeing vulnerable people being fucking used by predators. 1.00

02:26:08.100 Right. 0.99

02:26:08.200 And you know what?

02:26:08.780 One thing that really makes me sick is when people use their children as weapons against others in their family.

02:26:15.360 Yeah.

02:26:15.920 Yeah.

02:26:16.660 Weaponizing children is horrible,

02:26:18.640 especially when it's,

02:26:19.580 you know,

02:26:19.940 for divorce and things like that.

02:26:21.380 It's so unfair.

02:26:22.680 Or even a sibling.

02:26:25.160 Yeah.

02:26:25.900 I'm not going to get into it,

02:26:26.880 but even a sibling.

02:26:28.420 Yeah.

02:26:28.860 Yeah.

02:26:30.420 And long story short,

02:26:31.580 I'm no longer allowed to see my nephews because I don't think the same way as my brother.

02:26:35.960 Yeah.

02:26:36.220 I haven't seen a lot of people in my family because,

02:26:38.200 of that reason as well.

02:26:39.520 Yeah.

02:26:40.000 Yeah. 1.00

02:26:40.420 But my fucking, 1.00

02:26:42.100 my niece is dead. 1.00

02:26:43.040 So I don't really have that problem anymore,

02:26:44.520 but I heard you tell that story.

02:26:46.780 That's the story, 1.00

02:26:47.380 but it's fucked, 1.00

02:26:47.900 man. 1.00

02:26:48.740 This world is so fucking. 1.00

02:26:51.740 Yeah. 0.99

02:26:52.320 I don't know.

02:26:53.020 It's not really,

02:26:53.920 it's not really.

02:26:54.940 I mean,

02:26:55.760 I guess what these,

02:26:56.820 this pain is what makes us who we are.

02:26:58.740 And,

02:26:59.180 you know,

02:27:00.180 you know,

02:27:00.460 they say it doesn't hurt you.

02:27:02.020 It just makes you stronger.

02:27:02.960 Well,

02:27:03.120 I don't know,

02:27:03.680 but it does something to you for sure.

02:27:06.000 It's not that it makes you stronger.

02:27:09.780 It's that it,

02:27:10.080 it makes you more resilient to those things in the future.

02:27:14.080 And I think it,

02:27:14.860 it allows you to be able to,

02:27:16.740 excuse me,

02:27:17.460 if you're able to grow and learn from it,

02:27:20.580 whatever that lesson is.

02:27:22.660 That's a good word.

02:27:23.760 That's a good word that you use resilient because,

02:27:26.440 because I didn't,

02:27:27.380 I used to be one of these guys that I would,

02:27:30.200 I would,

02:27:30.640 I would hear a word and I didn't really know what it meant.

02:27:33.820 And then I got,

02:27:34.720 I realized that I could get a dictionary and look it up.

02:27:36.760 And then I've come to an understanding for myself of what that word

02:27:39.320 meant.

02:27:40.060 And the first time I experienced the word resiliency,

02:27:42.460 it was actually when I was doing my apprenticeship as,

02:27:44.780 you know,

02:27:45.060 a young man in a transmission shop.

02:27:46.980 And they talked about resiliency was the ability of a friction plate in

02:27:50.440 an automatic transmission to go from a lubricated state to a sticky

02:27:53.600 state.

02:27:54.300 And that's called the resiliency of the plate.

02:27:56.960 And that's sort of a good definition of it for me because resiliency is 0.97

02:28:01.040 basically allowing stuff to fucking slide off. 0.79

02:28:03.400 But when you need to grip something, 0.97

02:28:04.900 you need to hold something you can and resilient.

02:28:07.780 I've,

02:28:08.460 I think that my resiliency is increased as I get older because the other thing 0.99

02:28:12.980 I think is it's none of my fucking business. 0.99

02:28:14.880 What you think of me, 0.99

02:28:15.720 right.

02:28:16.920 As soon as I start,

02:28:18.320 stop worrying about what you think and start worrying what I,

02:28:21.340 am I okay with this behavior?

02:28:23.020 Right.

02:28:24.000 Like Johnny said,

02:28:24.940 you can't control the situation,

02:28:26.240 but you can control how you react to it.

02:28:28.120 Right.

02:28:28.440 Yeah.

02:28:29.680 Yeah.

02:28:29.920 And how you move,

02:28:30.680 right.

02:28:30.980 How you move through situations and how you present yourself.

02:28:35.160 That's,

02:28:35.680 that's the important part,

02:28:36.640 right?

02:28:37.520 No,

02:28:37.800 you're right,

02:28:38.320 Jason.

02:28:38.660 You can, 1.00

02:28:40.080 you cannot give a shit about what other people think of you. 0.99

02:28:43.220 Because it, 0.99

02:28:45.200 because like,

02:28:45.760 again,

02:28:46.080 because that was like,

02:28:46.840 I had that little bit of a problem when I was younger.

02:28:49.380 And,

02:28:49.580 and so like,

02:28:51.120 I got over it and stuff like that.

02:28:52.860 Right.

02:28:53.100 And one thing that actually really got me over that really quick is being

02:28:56.020 efficient.

02:28:56.380 And I'd have people that were clearly more talented and been in the business

02:29:01.740 longer.

02:29:02.160 Right.

02:29:02.540 They would tell me things.

02:29:03.500 And at first I would just kind of be like,

02:29:04.800 yeah, 1.00

02:29:04.960 fuck you buddy, 1.00

02:29:05.540 whatever. 1.00

02:29:06.240 But then you'd have to sit back and think about it.

02:29:08.680 Well,

02:29:08.800 wait a second.

02:29:09.280 This isn't,

02:29:09.880 it's,

02:29:10.080 it's,

02:29:10.360 it's constructive criticism.

02:29:12.320 So you may,

02:29:13.740 so you might have this chip on your shoulder, 0.99

02:29:15.220 but there's always going to be somebody that's got an even bigger fucking chip that 0.99

02:29:18.220 knows more about what you're thinking that you think you do than you do. 0.99

02:29:21.460 And so I've had that a couple of times.

02:29:23.540 And,

02:29:23.940 um,

02:29:25.180 so,

02:29:25.700 uh, 1.00

02:29:26.500 Oh fuck. 1.00

02:29:26.940 I smoked a bong. 1.00

02:29:27.500 I lost my train of thought.

02:29:28.240 Sorry.

02:29:31.700 See,

02:29:32.160 I was the king of yeah,

02:29:33.340 but right.

02:29:34.300 So somebody would try and tell me something.

02:29:35.700 I'd be like,

02:29:36.040 yeah,

02:29:36.260 but,

02:29:36.540 and then I,

02:29:38.040 I met this old timer one and he was like,

02:29:40.420 everything you say after yeah, 1.00

02:29:42.180 but is bullshit. 1.00

02:29:43.520 So stop fucking saying yeah, 1.00

02:29:44.980 but cause it's bullshit. 1.00

02:29:46.220 You're making excuses. 1.00

02:29:47.700 Yeah.

02:29:48.080 And it's like when you say,

02:29:48.800 I'm sorry,

02:29:49.280 but nope.

02:29:50.360 Yeah.

02:29:51.020 That's not how it works.

02:29:52.360 You say,

02:29:52.960 I'm sorry.

02:29:53.920 You apologize.

02:29:55.300 And that's it.

02:29:56.680 There's no,

02:29:57.200 I'm sorry,

02:29:57.660 but well,

02:29:58.340 I was always like,

02:29:59.000 yeah,

02:29:59.100 I know,

02:29:59.480 but right.

02:30:01.260 So you don't understand how I,

02:30:02.740 you don't understand what it's like for me.

02:30:04.620 And that's like legitimately not being able to take,

02:30:07.000 and you're immediately putting your ego and your defensiveness up saying,

02:30:10.680 I know more than you.

02:30:11.680 I'm not interested in whatever it is you have to share with me.

02:30:14.320 Right.

02:30:14.660 And that's the other thing too,

02:30:15.840 when you're trying to have conversations with people,

02:30:17.980 whether it be,

02:30:19.180 you know,

02:30:19.540 whatever level and somebody,

02:30:20.640 somebody tries to it's funny because when you try to relate sometimes with somebody,

02:30:25.740 when they're going through something,

02:30:27.000 it can be received in the wrong way.

02:30:28.900 Right.

02:30:29.980 That's another thing that you have to try and remember when you're talking to somebody,

02:30:32.820 when you,

02:30:33.660 when you do that,

02:30:34.580 I know,

02:30:34.880 but right.

02:30:35.660 you have to be conscious of that.

02:30:38.900 You have to try and remove your ego.

02:30:40.700 And again,

02:30:41.380 like the older we get,

02:30:42.840 the more we're able to take that out of the equation and,

02:30:46.960 and move in life without having that ego in the forefront.

02:30:50.860 Right.

02:30:51.360 You take that and you put it behind you and you wear it proudly rather than having it in front of you and acting every,

02:30:57.940 making every move as an ego.

02:31:02.440 You know,

02:31:03.000 representing yourself in that way.

02:31:04.460 It shows not only a level of maturity,

02:31:07.320 but it also shows a level of,

02:31:09.220 like you said,

02:31:09.860 like that. 1.00

02:31:10.720 I don't give a fuck what you think about me. 0.99

02:31:14.020 Like your perception of me is not important. 0.99

02:31:17.800 At the end of the day,

02:31:18.680 if I can look at myself in the mirror and know that I'm moving with integrity and the way that I feel like I should be in whatever facet that is.

02:31:28.040 Like if I'm,

02:31:28.660 you know,

02:31:28.980 serving God or whatever it is,

02:31:30.500 then that's all that matters at the end of the day.

02:31:32.800 Right.

02:31:33.280 I'm doing what I'm supposed to do in my journey and I'm helping people along the way.

02:31:38.260 Right.

02:31:38.740 So like that,

02:31:39.620 that would happen to me too.

02:31:40.700 It's like,

02:31:40.920 before I changed the situation I was in,

02:31:42.840 I would actually do that very thing.

02:31:44.420 I'd look at myself in the mirror.

02:31:45.620 Like this ain't right.

02:31:49.240 Like there's something not right.

02:31:51.100 Like,

02:31:51.640 and it took many years because like in the situation I was in for many,

02:31:56.300 many years,

02:31:56.780 I just kind of went,

02:31:57.880 eh,

02:31:58.600 whatever.

02:31:59.840 And it just,

02:32:00.860 it would build,

02:32:01.740 build,

02:32:02.140 build it on both parts,

02:32:03.220 not just one, 0.99

02:32:03.860 but on both fucking parts. 1.00

02:32:05.540 And again, 1.00

02:32:06.020 when it comes down to,

02:32:07.920 you have to,

02:32:08.760 to be able to help somebody else,

02:32:11.260 you have to be able to admit that you have a problem yourself.

02:32:15.620 And,

02:32:16.360 and that's,

02:32:17.020 that's one of the things,

02:32:17.960 that's one thing when it came to the particular situation that I had was in,

02:32:21.220 I had to admit to myself that this is a,

02:32:24.280 this is a very toxic situation.

02:32:26.140 And if one of us doesn't do something about it,

02:32:28.580 it's going to get even worse.

02:32:29.840 And so I,

02:32:30.820 that's in a lot of different ways,

02:32:32.380 like in a,

02:32:32.720 like in a lot of faults I've had,

02:32:34.340 like I've,

02:32:34.680 I've had addictions and stuff like that.

02:32:36.060 And so the number one thing for me personally,

02:32:38.160 cause everybody's different is I had to accept the fact that I had a problem.

02:32:42.260 And once you could do that in my,

02:32:46.220 for me,

02:32:47.400 anyways,

02:32:47.680 again,

02:32:48.080 I hate saying this,

02:32:49.140 once you could do that meeting everybody,

02:32:50.720 but like for me,

02:32:51.940 um,

02:32:53.660 that is one of the big things that helped me overcome issues, 0.99

02:32:56.600 except accepting the fact that there was a fucking problem. 0.99

02:32:59.340 And it was because of, 0.99

02:33:00.700 and it was my fault.

02:33:01.800 Nobody else's,

02:33:02.940 my own fault.

02:33:04.100 I had to accept that fact as well.

02:33:06.400 Yeah.

02:33:06.720 Accountability and responsibility is,

02:33:08.380 is important,

02:33:09.380 but it's also,

02:33:10.060 again,

02:33:10.260 it's one of those things where it shows that you,

02:33:12.080 you've come to a place in your life where you're like,

02:33:14.080 okay,

02:33:15.060 this is,

02:33:15.760 you know,

02:33:16.140 my bet.

02:33:17.180 I made it.

02:33:18.080 So I have to lie in it now.

02:33:19.740 Right.

02:33:20.100 Yeah.

02:33:20.520 And we're all,

02:33:22.020 we,

02:33:22.340 we all have that,

02:33:24.320 you know,

02:33:24.640 the,

02:33:25.200 the reason that we're able to sort of have these conversations,

02:33:28.900 um,

02:33:30.140 and relate to each other is because I think we've all had to stand in

02:33:34.160 front of that mirror and look at ourselves and go,

02:33:36.960 like,

02:33:38.340 I'm disappointed in myself,

02:33:40.080 you know,

02:33:40.840 and had to make some real changes in how we move.

02:33:44.120 Right.

02:33:45.040 Yeah.

02:33:45.540 Yeah.

02:33:45.760 Getting out of that denial.

02:33:47.560 Yeah.

02:33:47.820 And I mean,

02:33:48.180 that's,

02:33:48.400 that's the first step in,

02:33:49.420 in,

02:33:49.820 um,

02:33:50.780 in ego deflation is,

02:33:52.240 is recognizing that,

02:33:54.740 okay, 0.99

02:33:55.020 my fucking truck is not moving. 0.99

02:33:57.480 Why? 0.99

02:33:58.140 Oh,

02:33:58.420 is it out of gas?

02:34:00.160 Well,

02:34:00.340 yeah,

02:34:00.480 it's out of gas, 1.00

02:34:01.160 but fuck it. 1.00

02:34:01.700 If I changed the tire or if I add some washer fluid, 1.00

02:34:04.360 or if I just put a new seat in here, 0.98

02:34:06.660 it'll fucking go again. 0.99

02:34:07.580 No, 0.99

02:34:07.800 you're out of gas. 1.00

02:34:08.560 You need to fucking fix the problem. 1.00

02:34:09.900 Right. 0.99

02:34:10.260 So until you're really to accept that,

02:34:12.740 okay,

02:34:13.000 I'm out of gas.

02:34:14.020 I just drove past the gas station,

02:34:15.440 but I'm out of gas,

02:34:16.580 you know,

02:34:17.540 until you're really to look at the actual problem for what it is.

02:34:20.560 And a lot of the times we're,

02:34:21.920 we're not,

02:34:22.220 we're not even able to do that for ourselves.

02:34:23.980 Like that's why when you look at those 12 steps,

02:34:26.860 that's why it says we,

02:34:28.200 the first word is we, 1.00

02:34:29.440 because you can't fix your own fucking problem. 1.00

02:34:31.240 Right. 1.00

02:34:31.540 If you,

02:34:31.880 if you can fix your own problem,

02:34:32.880 you wouldn't be in the problem.

02:34:34.220 Yeah.

02:34:35.280 Yeah.

02:34:37.480 And that goes back to the original thing,

02:34:39.140 how we started this whole stream is that,

02:34:41.460 you know,

02:34:42.100 we're supposed to be units.

02:34:44.260 We're supposed to have a person to be able to be our support and our

02:34:49.960 strength.

02:34:50.320 When we don't have that for ourselves,

02:34:51.780 you know,

02:34:52.680 we're supposed to be able to have that,

02:34:54.640 that partner that we're supposed to be able to lean on.

02:34:58.060 Right.

02:34:58.640 And that door has to swing both ways.

02:35:01.320 Absolutely.

02:35:02.640 And this is the situation I was in,

02:35:04.500 the door only swung one way.

02:35:06.440 Right.

02:35:06.840 And that's obviously,

02:35:07.840 you know,

02:35:08.180 you're not in the right,

02:35:09.400 in the right place.

02:35:10.260 And the thing is,

02:35:11.420 is that when people say that relationships are 50,

02:35:13.560 50,

02:35:14.100 that's not the way it goes.

02:35:15.500 Relationships aren't 50,

02:35:16.420 50.

02:35:17.240 You're never going to be equally balanced.

02:35:19.760 There's always going to be an imbalance of,

02:35:22.220 of one person against the other sort,

02:35:24.760 not against the other,

02:35:25.860 in a different place than the other,

02:35:27.500 where you're going to have to support the other person in one way or

02:35:29.720 another.

02:35:30.020 Right.

02:35:30.780 Because life isn't,

02:35:32.780 life isn't perfect.

02:35:33.960 And it's definitely not going to be without its,

02:35:36.560 you know,

02:35:36.900 its ups and downs and all of those things,

02:35:38.600 but it's,

02:35:39.060 it's recognized.

02:35:40.260 It's realizing that the person that you're with is going to be there and

02:35:44.380 is going to be able to be that person that when you can't give a

02:35:48.420 hundred percent,

02:35:49.320 they're going to be able to give that extra percent that you can't,

02:35:53.020 you know,

02:35:53.220 if you can only give 80% that day,

02:35:54.900 that person is going to be able to give their a hundred percent plus the

02:35:57.820 20% that you need in order for you to be able to function.

02:36:01.160 You know,

02:36:01.740 that's what you have to look for in your partner.

02:36:04.300 Yeah.

02:36:04.700 Not codependency where like, 1.00

02:36:06.300 Oh fuck, 0.99

02:36:06.720 if, 1.00

02:36:07.080 if she doesn't go to work tomorrow, 0.61

02:36:08.120 I'm going to starve to death. 0.85

02:36:09.220 Right.

02:36:09.600 Like knowing that you can work together and that these things are going to be,

02:36:14.520 you know,

02:36:14.800 whether it's good or bad,

02:36:15.760 that you're going to be able to have that person to be able to rely on.

02:36:18.660 Because again,

02:36:19.120 everything isn't going to be perfect all the time.

02:36:21.460 Yep.

02:36:22.220 And that's the one thing about Sarah and I,

02:36:24.300 like,

02:36:24.400 cause I met Sarah through work and we started talking cause we actually knew

02:36:29.260 each other probably about for a good five,

02:36:30.660 six months before we actually started dating ideal.

02:36:33.420 And,

02:36:33.880 uh,

02:36:34.420 so we'd actually worked,

02:36:35.440 we would talk quite a bit and we were both realizing that we were,

02:36:38.640 we were literally the pair of us were in the literal exact same situation.

02:36:45.360 Her was male,

02:36:46.500 me with a female.

02:36:47.100 And like,

02:36:48.560 and so it was so,

02:36:50.160 um,

02:36:52.200 grounding,

02:36:52.880 I guess is what I want to say.

02:36:54.300 When I was able to speak with somebody that was literally going through the exact same stuff.

02:36:59.640 Like I could say something and like,

02:37:02.160 she would literally finish my sentence because she already knew exactly what,

02:37:05.380 what was going on because literally,

02:37:07.200 and that's the fucked up thing was that it was literally the exact same type of situation. 0.87

02:37:10.740 Right. 0.92

02:37:11.600 Um,

02:37:12.620 and so that's the one thing about when it comes with me and Sarah is that we had that realization that we came from the same type of situation.

02:37:20.080 And so we're not going to go back into any type of situation like that,

02:37:25.300 either one of us.

02:37:26.520 Right.

02:37:26.580 And so that's why,

02:37:27.280 like,

02:37:28.180 and that's why I was trying to get out when it came to looking in the mirror,

02:37:30.220 uh,

02:37:30.740 with the situation and the decisions that I've made in the past couple of years.

02:37:34.240 Um,

02:37:34.800 I look at myself in the mirror now and there's still,

02:37:37.200 some things that I still,

02:37:39.020 you need, 0.99

02:37:39.740 you need to work on this motherfucker. 1.00

02:37:41.560 Yeah. 0.99

02:37:41.820 But when it comes to the overall situation,

02:37:44.760 um,

02:37:46.080 I,

02:37:46.600 my gut tells me that I have done the right thing.

02:37:49.400 And,

02:37:49.920 um,

02:37:50.500 and so I'm not looking back whatsoever when it comes to,

02:37:53.600 like,

02:37:53.880 I don't have regrets in the decisions I've made to change my life.

02:37:57.620 Sure.

02:37:58.780 Yeah.

02:37:59.280 See,

02:37:59.400 that's how me and my wife kind of got together to you was like,

02:38:01.620 when,

02:38:02.500 when I separated from my ex-wife,

02:38:04.740 uh,

02:38:05.560 I came,

02:38:06.240 like,

02:38:06.760 I left the house.

02:38:07.860 I moved out and I came back to the house to like to our house,

02:38:11.480 but we were separated.

02:38:12.720 Not very long,

02:38:13.480 maybe a week or two,

02:38:14.480 but I came back and on the washing machine was her diary. 1.00

02:38:17.820 And I fucking was an idiot. 1.00

02:38:19.140 And I read it. 1.00

02:38:19.860 And I read about her affair or her,

02:38:22.720 whatever she was doing. 0.99

02:38:24.460 And I fucking, 0.99

02:38:25.580 I got so hurt. 0.99

02:38:27.080 I was so fucking, 0.98

02:38:28.460 because at that point I still thought there was a chance. 0.99

02:38:30.540 And I was so fucking damaged by her cheating on me. 0.98

02:38:33.380 I was so mad. 0.99

02:38:34.380 I was so angry. 1.00

02:38:35.840 Fucking, 0.99

02:38:36.320 I felt like, 1.00

02:38:36.880 Oh man, 1.00

02:38:37.380 I got a little dick or I'm just like useless or like, 1.00

02:38:40.500 I can't, 1.00

02:38:40.940 can't figure out.

02:38:42.000 And,

02:38:42.440 um,

02:38:43.380 and eventually that went away.

02:38:44.420 But my ex,

02:38:45.220 my wife now also, 0.98

02:38:46.540 I went through that with her husband and she was fucking devastated by it. 0.96

02:38:50.760 And we came together and that, 0.99

02:38:52.560 that might've been the common thread that,

02:38:54.460 that kept us together.

02:38:56.020 Like I don't have insecurities.

02:38:57.960 Like I did with my ex wife. 0.59

02:38:59.280 I always had insecurities.

02:39:00.580 Like,

02:39:01.380 but I don't have that with her now.

02:39:02.660 Like I don't think,

02:39:03.700 Oh,

02:39:04.140 she's late for work. 0.99

02:39:05.160 She's at her boyfriend's or she's late home from work.

02:39:07.480 She's at her boyfriend's house.

02:39:08.500 No, 1.00

02:39:08.960 she's probably at fucking shoppers drug mart standing in line. 1.00

02:39:11.220 Right. 1.00

02:39:11.440 Like I just don't go there anymore.

02:39:13.700 So that security for me is really important.

02:39:16.220 And that same security is really important for her.

02:39:18.180 Like I don't flirt with other women. 0.64

02:39:20.580 I don't,

02:39:21.000 I don't pretend to be something I'm not.

02:39:23.740 So,

02:39:24.320 and I think she knows that.

02:39:25.380 So we have that connection,

02:39:28.300 that trust,

02:39:29.000 right.

02:39:29.340 Where I'm not going to do that to her.

02:39:30.700 And she's,

02:39:31.100 I don't believe she would ever do that to me.

02:39:32.740 That doesn't mean our relationship couldn't fail.

02:39:35.020 It just means that it's not going to be because of that.

02:39:37.460 I don't,

02:39:37.760 I don't think maybe I'm naive,

02:39:39.400 but that,

02:39:40.560 that was one of the major things that my ex wife was doing for quite some 1.00

02:39:43.940 time.

02:39:44.740 And,

02:39:45.200 uh,

02:39:45.380 I was,

02:39:45.760 I was oblivious to it for a while.

02:39:48.260 And then,

02:39:49.040 uh,

02:39:49.920 I,

02:39:50.920 I figured it out,

02:39:52.360 found out.

02:39:53.280 And,

02:39:53.560 uh,

02:39:53.780 and basically,

02:39:56.500 so I,

02:39:57.740 I stayed the first time because I was like,

02:40:00.120 I was, 0.69

02:40:00.540 wasn't willing to throw away that many years over something retarded like 1.00

02:40:04.920 that. 0.93

02:40:05.420 Um,

02:40:06.080 but I didn't have to read anybody's diary or read anybody's phone or

02:40:12.580 anything like that. 0.99

02:40:13.520 Betrayal sucks. 0.99

02:40:16.440 And finding out you've been not chosen, 0.99

02:40:19.940 like finding out that somebody else has been chosen instead of you is such a

02:40:25.480 horrible feeling.

02:40:27.500 Not just somebody else,

02:40:28.880 other people,

02:40:30.240 multiple.

02:40:30.620 Yeah,

02:40:31.100 sure.

02:40:31.660 And so,

02:40:32.180 that's,

02:40:37.400 that's,

02:40:38.000 that's when I started,

02:40:39.960 that's when I was just like,

02:40:40.760 you know what?

02:40:41.960 No,

02:40:42.720 no.

02:40:43.580 Um,

02:40:44.020 but the catch was,

02:40:45.140 it's like,

02:40:45.480 I had to stay in that situation for close to six months before I can go.

02:40:49.980 And I,

02:40:50.640 and it was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do in my life was

02:40:55.060 emotionally detach yourself from somebody while living in the same house

02:41:00.740 with them.

02:41:01.640 Very hard.

02:41:03.260 I had to leave the town.

02:41:04.660 I moved,

02:41:05.000 I moved out of town.

02:41:05.880 I couldn't be around it.

02:41:06.860 That's exactly what,

02:41:07.380 that's exactly what I had to do.

02:41:09.140 Every time I saw Harley Davidson,

02:41:10.700 I thought,

02:41:11.000 oh yeah, 1.00

02:41:11.380 fucking, 1.00

02:41:12.020 you know, 1.00

02:41:12.400 that's him.

02:41:13.480 Yeah.

02:41:13.700 Right.

02:41:14.280 Oh yeah.

02:41:16.560 And see,

02:41:16.960 the thing is too,

02:41:17.500 is that like,

02:41:18.640 I'm not, 0.99

02:41:19.020 I don't sit here and shit talk to this person. 0.99

02:41:20.640 Neither. 0.99

02:41:20.960 Like,

02:41:21.360 I hope this person's doing better.

02:41:23.080 Right.

02:41:23.480 Like,

02:41:23.800 like,

02:41:24.120 I don't know how many times in the years I was with this person,

02:41:26.780 how many times that like,

02:41:27.760 probably at least two to three times a month I'd hear,

02:41:30.640 I hate my life.

02:41:33.200 And so when I decided to change all that,

02:41:37.560 um,

02:41:39.420 where'd that go?

02:41:40.300 Because like,

02:41:40.920 if for somebody that kept telling me for all these years,

02:41:42.980 like at least once a month, 0.91

02:41:44.380 I hate my life with you. 0.91

02:41:45.620 And then you decided to, 0.99

02:41:47.000 okay,

02:41:47.880 now you don't have to hate your life with me.

02:41:50.120 I'm out.

02:41:50.980 And now,

02:41:51.260 but, 0.98

02:41:51.420 but I'm all of a sudden the fucking bad guy because I decided to, 0.97

02:41:54.760 to basically help you. 0.98

02:41:56.480 So you don't have to hate your life with me anymore.

02:41:59.020 Kind of deal.

02:41:59.720 So like,

02:42:00.300 like,

02:42:00.460 again,

02:42:00.860 I don't sit here and go,

02:42:01.720 yeah, 1.00

02:42:01.860 fuck this. 1.00

02:42:02.280 I don't do that anymore. 1.00

02:42:03.180 Like I actually hope she's doing better.

02:42:04.640 Right.

02:42:05.000 Because we were toxic together. 1.00

02:42:06.140 We were the vicious fucking circle. 1.00

02:42:07.660 And that's exactly what it was. 0.99

02:42:08.960 And I,

02:42:09.280 I was able to understand that fact that it wasn't just her.

02:42:12.640 It was also me as well.

02:42:13.720 And it just didn't work.

02:42:15.420 And so I had,

02:42:16.200 I had to break that.

02:42:17.760 I had to break that.

02:42:18.740 So I have the update.

02:42:19.780 We've all been.

02:42:20.880 Yeah.

02:42:21.260 I have the update.

02:42:21.900 We've all been waiting for.

02:42:23.100 All right.

02:42:23.440 Let's hear it.

02:42:24.160 Come on in.

02:42:24.900 Come on in here.

02:42:26.220 Hi,

02:42:26.580 buddy.

02:42:26.940 Hi,

02:42:27.100 buddy.

02:42:29.960 So that you can hear.

02:42:32.660 Hi,

02:42:33.000 little man.

02:42:33.640 What's going on?

02:42:35.280 Some girl, 0.93

02:42:36.040 when I was playing with my friend,

02:42:40.140 some,

02:42:40.720 well,

02:42:41.360 she kissed me once and I hated it.

02:42:43.600 So,

02:42:44.520 oh,

02:42:45.060 when she was kicking me,

02:42:47.200 I grabbed her leg and pushed her away from me. 1.00

02:42:52.240 Then she punched me. 1.00

02:42:54.740 And then my nose was bleeding for 20 minutes.

02:42:57.820 And it really hurt.

02:43:01.240 Better now.

02:43:03.000 So,

02:43:03.360 so she tried to kiss you without asking for consent. 0.64

02:43:06.040 She didn't ask you permission to kiss you? 0.98

02:43:10.940 No.

02:43:11.980 I,

02:43:12.400 I would have.

02:43:13.280 What happens if you have a girlfriend? 0.99

02:43:17.060 My uncle will try and kill me? 0.98

02:43:19.200 No. 1.00

02:43:19.920 You go straight to jail.

02:43:21.360 Straight to jail.

02:43:23.120 Straight to jail.

02:43:24.300 I don't even like her.

02:43:25.560 She's only in grade one.

02:43:28.560 Yuck.

02:43:29.060 He's getting the younger ones.

02:43:31.060 I don't even like her.

02:43:32.700 That's good.

02:43:33.460 You know what?

02:43:33.980 Next time she tries to kiss her or kiss you, 0.99

02:43:36.520 you should definitely like do like a sweep with your legs and take her out. 1.00

02:43:39.580 You can't, 0.97

02:43:41.440 you can't hit girls,

02:43:42.540 right?

02:43:42.740 Cause hitting girls is not okay, 0.91

02:43:44.060 but you can definitely take her out at like the,

02:43:46.020 at the feet.

02:43:46.900 Just give her like a sweep. 1.00

02:43:48.620 Well,

02:43:49.060 that that's a discussion that we had to have on the way back here because apparently he did hit her back.

02:43:55.380 Well,

02:43:56.120 sometimes it's okay,

02:43:57.520 but that's probably not a situation where it's okay to hit a girl.

02:44:00.580 Right?

02:44:01.420 Yeah.

02:44:01.840 That's what I said.

02:44:02.600 I was like,

02:44:02.820 you probably shouldn't do that.

02:44:03.640 Maybe a headlock and a hip toss to the ground or something,

02:44:06.020 but you know,

02:44:06.680 some sweet chin. 0.69

02:44:08.480 Play with your buddies.

02:44:10.820 There we go.

02:44:11.980 I just figured we'd do that update.

02:44:13.620 Why not?

02:44:14.440 He is so cute.

02:44:16.160 Yeah.

02:44:16.400 He is.

02:44:16.660 He's such a good kid.

02:44:17.660 Really?

02:44:18.380 That is so funny.

02:44:21.200 Yeah.

02:44:21.460 The thing I love that he had,

02:44:23.920 I was just going to say,

02:44:24.740 I love that.

02:44:25.100 He has no problem getting on the mic.

02:44:26.640 Love that.

02:44:27.240 I was going to say like,

02:44:29.900 after I found out about the cheating too,

02:44:32.020 I blamed myself,

02:44:33.380 right?

02:44:33.820 Oh, 1.00

02:44:34.060 fuck man. 1.00

02:44:34.500 I've been working too much. 1.00

02:44:35.980 Oh,

02:44:36.140 I should have bought her flowers. 0.93

02:44:37.720 I didn't,

02:44:38.420 I,

02:44:38.540 I should have bought her those pants that she wanted that I said she couldn't 1.00

02:44:41.420 bought or,

02:44:42.080 you know,

02:44:42.220 whatever,

02:44:42.700 whatever.

02:44:43.180 I can't think of what it was,

02:44:44.280 but I blamed myself like,

02:44:46.800 Oh, 1.00

02:44:46.980 you're a loser. 1.00

02:44:48.200 You know, 1.00

02:44:48.760 like I went through a million different emotions and thoughts about what causes.

02:44:53.060 And you know what? 0.99

02:44:53.620 I fucking came very close just to fucking ending my life. 0.99

02:44:56.120 The only reason I didn't is because, 0.99

02:44:58.100 you know,

02:44:58.760 I have my three children with her and I,

02:45:01.780 I,

02:45:02.220 I don't know.

02:45:03.040 I didn't think she was going to be able to take care of them.

02:45:04.860 To be honest,

02:45:05.360 I thought I was going to have to.

02:45:06.480 So,

02:45:06.800 and that was a scary reality too.

02:45:08.980 Like, 1.00

02:45:09.160 Holy fuck. 1.00

02:45:09.660 What happens if she just ditches these kids on me? 1.00

02:45:11.580 Cause I'm not in a position.

02:45:12.600 I mean,

02:45:12.840 I basically lived in logging camps.

02:45:14.860 So how am I supposed to deal with this? 0.99

02:45:18.080 It's fucked, 1.00

02:45:18.720 man. 1.00

02:45:21.600 Nope.

02:45:22.340 Yeah.

02:45:23.040 Scared Sarah off.

02:45:24.000 All right.

02:45:25.100 Yeah.

02:45:26.120 I'll be right back.

02:45:28.780 I just have to go and do a work thing for two seconds.

02:45:31.540 All right.

02:45:32.340 All right.

02:45:33.540 Speeders.

02:45:34.320 Better come,

02:45:35.100 better,

02:45:35.680 better come back. 1.00

02:45:36.560 We're going to send Connor over to fucking. 0.99

02:45:38.840 Yeah. 0.99

02:45:39.060 Right.

02:45:39.580 We already know that he'll hit back.

02:45:41.360 So,

02:45:41.980 um,

02:45:42.420 actually that is something that I had to learn too,

02:45:44.740 though.

02:45:44.920 Um,

02:45:45.740 like I,

02:45:46.180 my kid's mom,

02:45:47.440 uh,

02:45:47.760 that was not, 1.00

02:45:48.520 that was a toxic as fuck situation. 0.99

02:45:52.140 Um, 0.99

02:45:53.080 like she would get pissed and just,

02:45:54.820 she would haul off, 0.99

02:45:55.480 punch me in the face at any point in time. 0.99

02:45:57.140 Like I wouldn't even see it coming. 0.97

02:45:58.740 Right.

02:45:59.780 Um,

02:46:00.220 and that's,

02:46:00.620 that's where I get that headlock hip toss to the ground idea from,

02:46:03.300 because I've actually had to use that.

02:46:05.020 Um,

02:46:05.460 that was my go-to move because as much as I want to say that if you punch me in 0.90

02:46:11.620 the face, 0.99

02:46:12.400 you deserve a punch back. 0.99

02:46:16.220 Um, 0.72

02:46:16.740 it was also always ingrained.

02:46:19.380 Don't hit a woman.

02:46:20.500 Right.

02:46:21.640 So it would always be some kind of move just to restrain.

02:46:26.000 Um,

02:46:26.440 now I do,

02:46:27.200 I will say my biggest regret there,

02:46:28.960 I had an opportunity to actually press charges,

02:46:31.660 uh,

02:46:32.320 one time.

02:46:33.300 Unfortunately,

02:46:34.120 I decided not to,

02:46:36.300 so that didn't work out for me,

02:46:37.680 but,

02:46:37.800 uh,

02:46:39.080 how much,

02:46:39.980 what's that?

02:46:40.460 How much Connor charged to get my,

02:46:42.160 Oh,

02:46:42.360 maybe we,

02:46:43.320 we could work something out.

02:46:44.860 You got a new business opportunity there.

02:46:48.520 Yeah.

02:46:49.180 Start sending Connor around.

02:46:54.400 I just noticed that.

02:46:57.780 Yeah.

02:46:58.280 Right.

02:46:59.180 No,

02:46:59.440 it's tough being in,

02:47:00.740 in situations like that though.

02:47:02.240 Right.

02:47:02.540 Um,

02:47:03.180 and this is where like,

02:47:05.660 I mean,

02:47:05.980 obviously when,

02:47:06.820 when we speak domestic abuse,

02:47:08.140 I mean,

02:47:08.420 majority of the time we talk about,

02:47:09.880 you know,

02:47:10.540 male on female.

02:47:12.460 And when people ask like why they don't just leave,

02:47:16.420 well,

02:47:16.820 I mean,

02:47:17.080 there's a myriad of reasons why not.

02:47:19.580 Um,

02:47:19.940 like in my case,

02:47:20.900 I didn't want to leave because I knew that the way the family court system works, 0.99

02:47:26.800 I'm probably going to get fucked over. 0.98

02:47:29.360 Um, 0.99

02:47:29.800 and in which case I was right.

02:47:30.760 I did.

02:47:32.000 Um,

02:47:32.400 in the end,

02:47:33.100 but I was trying to do everything in my power to keep it together just so that I could stay in my kid's life.

02:47:41.120 Right.

02:47:41.480 Like that's,

02:47:41.960 that's what it was to me.

02:47:43.800 Like it had nothing to do with whether or not I liked his mother.

02:47:47.160 It had nothing to do with whether or not I wanted that relationship.

02:47:50.620 It had everything to do with,

02:47:52.220 this is the only way that I believe that I will be in my son's life.

02:47:55.900 So I have to just sit here,

02:47:57.740 take those punches, 1.00

02:47:58.880 take the shit and just deal with it. 1.00

02:48:02.560 Well, 1.00

02:48:02.960 plus I didn't want to lose my house too.

02:48:04.540 Cause I mean,

02:48:04.940 I'd lived with her for 13 years and everything in the house,

02:48:07.520 even to this day,

02:48:08.720 I still think of things. 1.00

02:48:09.740 Fuck. 1.00

02:48:10.000 I didn't take that. 1.00

02:48:10.720 I should have took that,

02:48:11.480 you know,

02:48:11.700 like my tandoori oven that I bought,

02:48:14.040 you know, 1.00

02:48:14.640 stupid little things like this. 1.00

02:48:16.320 Like, 1.00

02:48:16.540 I'm just like, 1.00

02:48:17.040 Oh fuck. 0.99

02:48:17.420 I didn't want to leave my house, 1.00

02:48:18.440 but I didn't want to stay there either because I just knew myself.

02:48:21.960 I was in so much emotional torment over it.

02:48:24.460 I just couldn't stay.

02:48:25.620 You know,

02:48:26.480 uh,

02:48:26.780 wild skews comment here.

02:48:28.420 Uh,

02:48:28.740 emotional abuse is the worst.

02:48:30.680 When you push back and your abuser plays the victim.

02:48:32.980 That is,

02:48:33.600 that is literally exactly.

02:48:35.300 Yes.

02:48:35.820 That is a hundred percent true.

02:48:37.000 It's narcissism.

02:48:38.600 One-on-one.

02:48:39.520 Oh boy.

02:48:41.160 Yeah.

02:48:41.700 And,

02:48:41.780 Oh yeah.

02:48:43.020 And taking love away is another one.

02:48:45.480 That's a big one too.

02:48:46.620 Um,

02:48:47.020 like the silent treatment as an example.

02:48:50.320 Yep.

02:48:51.260 Like if,

02:48:52.000 if I get the silent treatment,

02:48:53.200 I'm going to tell you what, 1.00

02:48:54.060 I'm going to give you the fucking, 1.00

02:48:55.180 the, 1.00

02:48:55.800 the,

02:48:56.300 the just forever silent treatment.

02:48:59.520 That's just the way that's going to work.

02:49:01.440 Um,

02:49:01.960 I get the sun.

02:49:02.800 I don't know.

02:49:04.340 Well,

02:49:04.860 okay.

02:49:06.380 Silent treatment.

02:49:07.340 An hour or two.

02:49:08.500 Right.

02:49:09.080 But,

02:49:09.400 but that's the thing,

02:49:10.100 silent treatment and not addressing it right now are two totally different things.

02:49:14.760 Yeah.

02:49:15.340 Right. 0.99

02:49:15.500 I'm the kind of person I wanted to address the gun fucking now. 0.99

02:49:18.560 Well, 0.99

02:49:19.100 and,

02:49:19.400 and I'm not like,

02:49:20.540 I,

02:49:20.840 I would rather address something right away,

02:49:22.700 but I also understand the idea of taking that moment to let it simmer for a little bit first.

02:49:29.340 Um,

02:49:30.180 but it's when the silent treatment is used as a punishment,

02:49:34.920 that is where it becomes different because to me,

02:49:40.020 that is where you are. 0.99

02:49:41.140 You are straight up showing that you can turn your love off at any fucking point in time. 0.99

02:49:44.980 And I can't trust that. 0.99

02:49:46.820 Exactly.

02:49:47.380 Right.

02:49:47.660 Like that is a, 0.98

02:49:49.860 that is a very fucking cruel thing to do to somebody. 0.99

02:49:52.360 My ex would do that to me all the fucking time. 0.99

02:49:55.940 And now because of that, 0.99

02:49:57.800 um,

02:49:59.180 like Sarah,

02:49:59.840 she's generally a quiet person.

02:50:01.520 And like,

02:50:02.160 so like if she's had a stressful day at work or something like that,

02:50:04.580 like she's,

02:50:05.720 she's quiet.

02:50:06.500 Like she won't really say much or whatever the case may be.

02:50:09.100 Right.

02:50:09.960 And,

02:50:10.460 and so even,

02:50:11.940 even we're almost two years into our relationship and even still,

02:50:16.020 like I'll see her quiet,

02:50:17.280 not saying a word or anything like that.

02:50:18.640 And my first reaction is you're okay.

02:50:21.920 Did I do something to piss you off or anything like that?

02:50:24.400 And she'd be like,

02:50:25.580 no,

02:50:25.980 no,

02:50:26.520 it's not.

02:50:26.820 I just had a old insecurities.

02:50:29.420 But yeah,

02:50:30.040 exactly.

02:50:30.560 It's,

02:50:30.800 it's like,

02:50:31.660 I don't like,

02:50:32.960 I'm trying to push that away,

02:50:34.160 but it's,

02:50:34.600 it's things that it's the baggage.

02:50:36.300 Right.

02:50:36.780 Cause my ex,

02:50:37.560 if you do, 0.99

02:50:38.140 she'd do just that fucking slam the door. 1.00

02:50:40.420 You'd be like, 0.99

02:50:40.740 Hey,

02:50:40.840 can we talk about this? 1.00

02:50:42.080 Fuck off. 1.00

02:50:43.020 We talk about this. 1.00

02:50:43.840 Fuck you. 1.00

02:50:44.300 Drop dad, 1.00

02:50:44.880 get out of my life. 0.95

02:50:45.580 Blah, 1.00

02:50:45.720 shit like that. 1.00

02:50:46.520 And it's like, 1.00

02:50:47.280 the fuck or nothing at all completely. 1.00

02:50:49.920 And, 0.99

02:50:50.380 and,

02:50:51.180 and like I said,

02:50:51.700 that would transpose him to now.

02:50:53.100 And like,

02:50:53.840 Sarah will come home and like,

02:50:54.880 like,

02:50:55.100 again,

02:50:55.440 tired,

02:50:55.880 have a long day at work and be quiet.

02:50:57.880 And here's,

02:50:58.480 here's my reaction going, 1.00

02:51:00.220 Oh fuck. 1.00

02:51:00.600 Was she pissed off at me? 1.00

02:51:02.380 But that's not the case at all.

02:51:04.000 But my brain is saying,

02:51:05.540 Oh,

02:51:05.700 I think she was sick.

02:51:06.440 That was just a reason.

02:51:07.520 Right.

02:51:08.080 And then you get that old PTSD where like, 0.99

02:51:10.140 Oh fuck, 1.00

02:51:10.520 she's mad at me. 1.00

02:51:11.100 Now she's going to go fuck some other dude. 1.00

02:51:13.260 And, 1.00

02:51:13.660 uh,

02:51:13.900 it's my,

02:51:14.720 my life's over. 0.99

02:51:15.500 I may as well just fucking end it. 0.99

02:51:17.180 And that's where the communication comes in. 0.97

02:51:19.680 Sorry,

02:51:19.920 Jason.

02:51:20.220 That's where,

02:51:20.700 again,

02:51:20.840 like I said at the beginning,

02:51:21.780 like it's,

02:51:22.660 it's so important to be able to have that safe space communication between you and your partner to be able to say like,

02:51:28.220 you know,

02:51:28.900 when Sarah is having a bad day,

02:51:30.820 you know,

02:51:31.280 that when she comes home and she's quiet,

02:51:33.680 it's because she's,

02:51:34.920 you know,

02:51:35.080 she's had a bad day and maybe you just allowing her that space to be able to,

02:51:40.100 to be in her own,

02:51:41.640 you know,

02:51:41.920 and to you to say,

02:51:44.160 you know,

02:51:44.360 like whenever you're ready,

02:51:45.660 I'm available for you to talk about this,

02:51:48.440 but I'm not going to push it because I,

02:51:49.900 I,

02:51:50.160 I see that you're,

02:51:51.300 you're not comfortable,

02:51:52.120 but know that I,

02:51:54.240 I'm allowing you that opportunity when you're ready to be able to talk about it with no judgment.

02:51:59.720 Right.

02:52:00.500 That's,

02:52:00.700 that's pretty much exactly what I do.

02:52:02.660 Yeah.

02:52:02.960 And I,

02:52:03.660 I think another,

02:52:04.560 another piece too,

02:52:05.640 is where earlier I stated that,

02:52:10.040 you know,

02:52:10.540 we're not really taught how to deal with our emotions.

02:52:12.400 We're also not taught how to argue.

02:52:15.700 And not together.

02:52:17.200 I've noticed.

02:52:17.940 Yeah.

02:52:18.260 Right.

02:52:18.660 One thing I've noticed like since quitting drinking,

02:52:21.180 because I've,

02:52:22.500 I've had one relationship after quitting drinking and all of the ones beforehand.

02:52:29.200 And while sure that relationship did not work out.

02:52:33.340 Unfortunately,

02:52:33.820 it was one sided on my end.

02:52:35.640 But I noticed a very,

02:52:39.220 very stark contrast in how I treated that relationship and how I treated the ones previously,

02:52:46.520 especially when it came to arguing.

02:52:49.580 Because previously I would have been the slamming the doors,

02:52:54.080 the yelling,

02:52:54.960 the insults,

02:52:56.320 the,

02:52:57.220 you know what I mean?

02:52:57.640 Just the anger and allowing that to come out.

02:53:02.060 And whereas afterwards,

02:53:04.320 I've become a little more honest in how I feel and understood better that when in an argument and trying to express what I am feeling to a partner to avoid the you statement.

02:53:19.380 And to use the I statement.

02:53:24.960 Right.

02:53:25.860 And sorry to interrupt,

02:53:27.640 but to also remember that when you're having a disagreement or an argument or something like that,

02:53:34.140 to try to try to try to remember not to fight against each other.

02:53:37.980 Because at the end of the day,

02:53:39.520 whatever you're arguing about or whatever it is that you're dealing with,

02:53:43.660 if you come at it as a unit,

02:53:45.920 rather than against each other,

02:53:49.420 the outcomes or,

02:53:51.840 you know,

02:53:52.400 it,

02:53:52.920 the,

02:53:53.120 it becomes such a,

02:53:54.480 a more positive situation.

02:53:57.200 And the conversation generally goes to somewhere of resolution rather than not,

02:54:02.020 you know,

02:54:02.720 because you're.

02:54:04.940 Yes.

02:54:05.440 Sorry,

02:54:05.560 go ahead.

02:54:06.180 No,

02:54:06.440 go ahead.

02:54:06.560 I didn't mean to interrupt you.

02:54:07.580 I was just going to say quick here.

02:54:09.060 Uncle Kenny was mentioned in the chat here.

02:54:10.900 He says he uses silence as a defense.

02:54:13.580 And so I asked him,

02:54:14.740 are you a Sagittarius?

02:54:16.240 Because I am.

02:54:17.680 And that,

02:54:19.220 and he wrote back,

02:54:20.220 you bet.

02:54:20.980 And the reason why I asked him that is because a lot of the,

02:54:24.780 now,

02:54:25.680 are you a December Sagittarius or,

02:54:27.540 or a November?

02:54:29.340 Because a December Sagittarius,

02:54:32.640 we,

02:54:34.100 we,

02:54:34.660 the only time we'll use silence is in defense.

02:54:37.840 Like,

02:54:38.340 like when we're being considerably attacked verbally,

02:54:40.900 I'll shut right up.

02:54:43.400 Actually,

02:54:43.840 for instance, 1.00

02:54:44.360 like just the other night when fucking fuck nut was on the screen, 0.99

02:54:47.660 you notice my mouth was shut until I just couldn't keep it shut. 1.00

02:54:51.400 Right.

02:54:52.480 But that's,

02:54:53.300 that's,

02:54:53.660 it's a Sagittarius trait.

02:54:54.860 And I would,

02:54:55.580 that was literally the exact same thing.

02:54:57.020 What would happen with my ex?

02:54:58.260 We'd be,

02:54:58.860 she'd be arguing and arguing and arguing with me. 1.00

02:55:00.860 And I tried to like bring like, 0.98

02:55:03.480 like instead of turning it into a fucking yelling, 0.99

02:55:05.260 screaming match, 1.00

02:55:05.820 I'd be trying to talk,

02:55:07.080 talk,

02:55:07.500 talk.

02:55:07.940 And it'd just be like this.

02:55:10.080 And I,

02:55:10.300 and that I just ended up shutting right up.

02:55:12.660 And I dummy right up. 0.99

02:55:14.000 And I wouldn't say a fucking word. 0.99

02:55:15.280 And it's not that I was giving her the silent treatment. 0.99

02:55:17.400 That was the only defense that I had from the verbal attack.

02:55:22.440 And,

02:55:23.040 and then once she was done,

02:55:24.460 then I spoke again.

02:55:25.780 Are you finished?

02:55:26.660 Can we talk about this normally now?

02:55:28.220 And that was,

02:55:29.700 I'd go silent for a couple of different reasons,

02:55:34.140 actually.

02:55:35.620 Like,

02:55:36.140 I know that there'd be times where if I did something and got called out on it 0.94

02:55:40.420 and realized that I was definitely in the fucking wrong, 0.98

02:55:43.520 that I'm silent as fuck. 0.99

02:55:45.060 Like, 0.99

02:55:45.540 I will just sit there and take whatever it is that's being given to me because

02:55:49.760 I,

02:55:50.100 I don't have anything to say for myself.

02:55:52.760 Or the other reason would be that when I've stayed silent,

02:55:57.460 it's because I do feel something.

02:55:59.180 I just don't want to say it.

02:56:00.740 I'm,

02:56:01.020 I'm,

02:56:02.220 it is that wall that I'm going to build around so that you don't know that I'm 0.95

02:56:06.580 fucking incredibly hurt. 0.90

02:56:08.000 because I don't, 0.99

02:56:10.100 I've always been very private that way.

02:56:12.920 And I don't want,

02:56:14.800 like I've,

02:56:15.320 like I said,

02:56:16.320 I've always viewed it as weakness.

02:56:17.700 I understand now that it isn't,

02:56:19.740 but for most of my life,

02:56:22.140 I have always viewed it as if I'm going to be honest about my feelings in terms

02:56:25.860 of sadness,

02:56:26.400 in terms of depression,

02:56:27.540 in terms of,

02:56:28.440 you know,

02:56:29.240 even love, 1.00

02:56:30.320 it is stupid as it sounds. 0.99

02:56:33.180 But if, 1.00

02:56:34.180 if I allow people to see this side of me,

02:56:36.900 then I felt that that was a weakness,

02:56:40.020 that I wasn't being strong.

02:56:43.080 The other thing that people tend to forget as well,

02:56:46.220 sorry,

02:56:46.480 Jason,

02:56:47.020 silence is power.

02:56:49.740 There's one of those things where sometimes the best response is no

02:56:55.440 response.

02:56:56.400 You know,

02:56:56.640 sometimes things really don't need to have an answer.

02:57:00.120 where we are in a,

02:57:03.540 a time where everybody always expects to have an answer for things and to

02:57:10.120 understand why people do things and stuff like that.

02:57:12.940 And we're not here to understand why other people do things,

02:57:15.740 you know?

02:57:16.800 And sometimes just no answer in silence is the best.

02:57:20.520 One thing I noticed about my relationship now compared to my previous ones was

02:57:26.020 that every time we,

02:57:28.640 we part it's, 0.99

02:57:30.180 I love you and a kiss every fucking single time. 0.99

02:57:32.920 Like if she walks out and forgets to give me a kiss goodbye, 0.99

02:57:36.240 then I go and chase her out to her car because,

02:57:38.280 but I never had that with my ex.

02:57:40.080 Like we didn't kiss. 0.99

02:57:43.900 It's not that we sit there and fucking neck, 0.99

02:57:45.980 but we, 0.99

02:57:46.460 you know,

02:57:46.740 it's a,

02:57:47.060 it's a goodbye kiss,

02:57:47.980 right?

02:57:48.280 Like,

02:57:48.520 I love you.

02:57:49.000 Have a good day.

02:57:50.360 And you're right.

02:57:51.020 You're right.

02:57:51.480 That's not the only thing thick on the Island.

02:57:54.480 East coast.

02:57:55.340 Imagine dating Helen Keller.

02:57:57.540 I mean,

02:57:58.060 the communication would be terrible.

02:58:03.660 Just saying,

02:58:04.580 you know,

02:58:05.240 silent treatment all day.

02:58:12.300 You can never turn your back on her and try to talk. 1.00

02:58:14.760 You can never turn your back on her and fucking try to talk to her. 0.99

02:58:17.300 She'd throw something at you. 1.00

02:58:19.440 Oh no. 1.00

02:58:19.660 She was blind and deaf and dumb. 1.00

02:58:21.120 Right. 1.00

02:58:21.320 She was all of them.

02:58:22.080 Right.

02:58:22.340 Yeah.

02:58:22.800 Yeah.

02:58:23.380 Okay.

02:58:23.860 Okay.

02:58:24.160 I got it.

02:58:24.540 I got her mixed up with somebody else.

02:58:26.140 She was, 0.97

02:58:26.500 she was selfish in her ailments. 0.97

02:58:31.420 Selfish in her ailments. 0.94

02:58:32.540 I thought I'd think about that one for a second.

02:58:35.240 Yeah.

02:58:35.600 She took them all.

02:58:38.560 All right.

02:58:39.000 Didn't want to leave any for anybody else.

02:58:41.260 It was,

02:58:41.760 everything was all about Helen Keller.

02:58:43.120 I'll never forget the time I saw Edgy do the Helen Keller song live.

02:58:51.260 It was so awesome.

02:58:52.880 Oh,

02:58:53.240 I've seen that clip.

02:58:54.580 I've seen that clip.

02:58:56.000 I was there.

02:58:57.320 It was so good.

02:58:59.180 Oh my God.

02:59:01.060 So good.

02:59:03.080 So funny.

02:59:04.500 So funny.

02:59:05.120 That is funny.

02:59:06.720 I like Kuala Mama.

02:59:07.660 Is it true she had a British accent or is that just a joke?

02:59:12.060 Oh my God.

02:59:13.220 I don't know.

02:59:13.440 I don't know how you'd pick up on it.

02:59:15.920 Oh,

02:59:16.320 it sounded like me.

02:59:18.180 Yeah.

02:59:18.620 Right.

02:59:19.860 I'll tell you. 0.98

02:59:21.080 I already know I'm going to hell. 0.78

02:59:22.460 So I got it.

02:59:23.780 Yeah.

02:59:24.180 Right.

02:59:24.340 I'm working on bonus miles.

02:59:25.980 Do you know why Helen Keller's dog ran away?

02:59:29.100 Oh my God.

02:59:29.760 Why?

02:59:30.840 You would too.

02:59:31.640 If your name was.

02:59:32.060 Oh my God.

02:59:36.920 That was one of my grandfather's favorite jokes.

02:59:39.720 Oh,

02:59:40.000 he's still telling that one.

02:59:41.680 Speaking of accents and stuff,

02:59:44.160 the ex-wife I was telling you about,

02:59:45.900 her father was a stroke survivor.

02:59:48.660 The stroke that he had basically took his feet.

02:59:50.900 And so he was,

02:59:51.640 he had very limited speech on what he could say.

02:59:54.520 And it was,

02:59:54.880 he'd sound like he was somebody that was deaf a bit.

02:59:56.920 Right.

02:59:57.740 Um,

02:59:58.760 but I can still hear his Cleveland accent.

03:00:01.660 I couldn't speak.

03:00:03.780 Just by the way,

03:00:04.360 he'd say certain words.

03:00:06.020 Right.

03:00:06.940 Ohio.

03:00:09.740 And my ex-wife should be like, 1.00

03:00:11.100 you can hear his accent still,

03:00:13.420 even after the stroke.

03:00:14.320 I'm like,

03:00:14.600 Oh yeah.

03:00:15.520 Yep.

03:00:16.140 Yep.

03:00:16.520 That's awesome.

03:00:18.140 Yep.

03:00:19.500 So I thought that was interesting.

03:00:21.460 That's awesome.

03:00:22.100 So it's actually kind of wondering if Helen Keller did have any form of speech at all.

03:00:27.780 Then if she couldn't hear though,

03:00:30.100 then she wouldn't have been able to pick up on the audio from parents.

03:00:34.620 Yeah.

03:00:35.720 So yeah,

03:00:36.640 more than likely it would be like,

03:00:37.940 cause there would be no,

03:00:41.160 because,

03:00:42.040 well,

03:00:42.480 I don't mean to make a part of it or anything like that,

03:00:44.560 but that's how children learn how to,

03:00:46.260 that's how children learn their accents is because it's taught to them by their parents when they're speaking to them.

03:00:50.660 It's like that video of the little English girl. 1.00

03:01:01.060 It's a fucking goat. 1.00

03:01:02.400 It's a fucking goat. 1.00

03:01:03.440 It's like maybe three, 1.00

03:01:04.380 four years old.

03:01:05.200 It's a goat. 1.00

03:01:05.940 It's a fucking goat. 1.00

03:01:08.640 No, 1.00

03:01:09.180 mommy. 1.00

03:01:09.520 It's a fucking goat. 1.00

03:01:11.040 You know, 1.00

03:01:11.360 the one I'm talking about.

03:01:12.120 Yeah.

03:01:12.320 Yeah.

03:01:13.320 It's a goat.

03:01:14.760 Yeah. 1.00

03:01:15.600 It's a fucking goat. 1.00

03:01:16.100 There was this kid. 1.00

03:01:18.300 I don't have Tik TOK anymore, 0.99

03:01:21.440 but she was on Tik TOK and fuck. 1.00

03:01:22.840 She had, 1.00

03:01:23.180 she was just a little thing,

03:01:24.300 about two or three years old,

03:01:25.520 but she was very good,

03:01:28.080 very good at verbalizing.

03:01:29.260 She had a big vocabulary,

03:01:30.400 but it's just so funny to hear these little kids talk like,

03:01:34.520 you know,

03:01:35.380 it's true.

03:01:37.620 Especially little,

03:01:38.280 especially children with large vocabulary.

03:01:41.200 Yeah.

03:01:42.080 And they're so small.

03:01:43.040 It's like, 1.00

03:01:43.340 what the fuck? 1.00

03:01:43.980 Yeah. 1.00

03:01:44.300 You're looking at it like, 1.00

03:01:45.320 is this a mission or a fucking child? 1.00

03:01:47.160 Yeah. 0.99

03:01:47.360 That's what I,

03:01:49.280 that's what I'm hoping for on Connor,

03:01:51.040 because I do not dumb my speech down at all for him.

03:01:55.620 Like I will use whatever words I can.

03:01:59.020 And what I really enjoy about him,

03:02:01.300 like,

03:02:01.580 especially this mostly happens on our walks to and from school.

03:02:05.800 That's like the,

03:02:06.700 the one moment where me and him really kind of just sit and kind of chat and

03:02:11.360 what have you.

03:02:12.140 But there's oftentimes I'll use a word and he has no idea what it is,

03:02:16.180 but he'll ask.

03:02:18.100 That must be me.

03:02:19.600 And that's what I appreciate is that he doesn't just let me say it,

03:02:24.940 gloss it over and just go with it.

03:02:26.760 It's if he hears a word that he doesn't understand,

03:02:28.860 he will stop me and say,

03:02:30.100 what does that word mean?

03:02:31.300 And then do you care of using it?

03:02:34.080 And I will gladly.

03:02:34.520 I mean,

03:02:37.540 sometimes,

03:02:38.140 but I definitely at every chance that I get,

03:02:41.240 if he asked me what a word means,

03:02:42.800 I will give him the definition.

03:02:45.000 I will tell him how it's used.

03:02:46.680 Like if it's a saying as an example,

03:02:48.840 like there's times where I'll use the saying and he's like,

03:02:51.120 what does that mean?

03:02:51.660 And then I'll have to,

03:02:52.660 you know,

03:02:52.940 kind of go into explaining it.

03:02:54.760 And,

03:02:55.060 you know,

03:02:55.580 it's a good thing to do,

03:02:56.500 man.

03:02:57.880 Oh,

03:02:58.000 it is.

03:02:58.400 And I'm trying to teach him to kind of think a little more,

03:03:01.820 right?

03:03:02.040 Like,

03:03:02.320 and especially when he asked like,

03:03:03.580 okay,

03:03:03.880 how do I spell this?

03:03:05.200 As an example,

03:03:06.140 he asked me all the time.

03:03:08.400 And it's now to a point where he knows he has to make an attempt at

03:03:13.200 spelling it first.

03:03:14.960 Right.

03:03:15.420 Because if he has not attempted to spell it first,

03:03:17.420 I will not do anything with that because the idea here is,

03:03:23.240 is I want you to try and think for yourself.

03:03:25.760 I want you to try and use your own brain power.

03:03:28.960 Now,

03:03:29.420 if you're struggling,

03:03:31.100 absolutely.

03:03:31.940 I'll step in and I'll give you some assistance,

03:03:33.860 but I want to see what can you do on your own first.

03:03:38.000 Right.

03:03:38.680 And then go from there.

03:03:40.880 And I find oftentimes he's,

03:03:43.240 he's excellent at that.

03:03:45.280 And it,

03:03:45.840 and I think it is because I've just constantly been on him about,

03:03:49.020 okay,

03:03:49.420 you try first and then I'll help you.

03:03:53.960 So,

03:03:54.460 uh,

03:03:54.760 Dacey media,

03:03:55.680 Twitter breaking,

03:03:57.020 the police send in horses to break up and protest by fishermen at the

03:04:00.140 confederation building in St.

03:04:01.560 John's,

03:04:01.880 Newfoundland.

03:04:03.440 Horses again.

03:04:05.200 Nope.

03:04:05.700 There are multiple reports of a man suffering,

03:04:07.440 a broken hip,

03:04:08.080 as well as a police officer being injured. 0.99

03:04:10.220 They fucking trample the horses in. 0.99

03:04:12.340 So like, 0.99

03:04:13.420 I love this.

03:04:14.100 If you,

03:04:14.640 if you want to protest,

03:04:15.840 it's just a Canadian issue.

03:04:16.980 You get trampled on by horses, 1.00

03:04:18.540 but if you want to fucking fishermen, 0.99

03:04:19.640 they want to sell their fish out of the province. 0.99

03:04:21.520 That's their,

03:04:21.940 that's what they're protesting.

03:04:23.260 Yeah.

03:04:24.380 Like,

03:04:25.500 why is that even an issue?

03:04:27.100 Yeah.

03:04:28.320 But there's Palestinians and Calistanis that are running around with 1.00

03:04:32.160 fricking knives in the middle of the street. 0.96

03:04:35.420 Oh,

03:04:35.860 the normies are learning.

03:04:37.000 The normies are figuring it out though.

03:04:39.660 They're starting to get it.

03:04:41.940 They are very much starting to get it.

03:04:43.900 Maybe,

03:04:44.140 maybe I'm not entirely sure.

03:04:44.920 They're only about 10 years too late though.

03:04:46.940 Some of the normies that I work with,

03:04:48.600 they're,

03:04:48.920 they're,

03:04:49.680 they're now talking to me going, 1.00

03:04:51.080 what the fuck is this? 1.00

03:04:52.560 What the fuck is that? 1.00

03:04:53.920 Like, 0.99

03:04:54.740 and I'm like,

03:04:55.840 you know what I mean?

03:04:56.860 Yeah,

03:04:57.060 go ahead.

03:04:57.280 I,

03:04:58.500 I've,

03:04:58.780 I've definitely seen where in certain,

03:05:00.240 like,

03:05:00.460 uh,

03:05:00.880 let's say the Jeets as an example is a, 0.94

03:05:02.720 is a topic where guests,

03:05:04.220 normies are noticing right there.

03:05:05.800 Um,

03:05:06.200 that that's a big one.

03:05:07.260 That's kind of helped.

03:05:08.720 Um,

03:05:09.080 but there's still a lot that they're just ignoring.

03:05:11.840 Right.

03:05:12.840 Um, 1.00

03:05:13.220 such as this whole fucking Palestinian, 1.00

03:05:15.680 Israeli fucking bullshit. 1.00

03:05:18.100 Soji bullshit too, 1.00

03:05:19.320 man. 1.00

03:05:19.980 Yep.

03:05:20.300 Yeah. 1.00

03:05:20.500 the Soji shit that's still being ignored. 0.99

03:05:22.760 And it's like, 1.00

03:05:23.660 all of this is connected,

03:05:25.460 but they just somehow don't understand that.

03:05:28.000 The two main things that I hear,

03:05:30.140 the two main things that I hear from the normies is the,

03:05:32.360 uh,

03:05:33.080 the replacement because they're right. 0.99

03:05:34.580 I've heard normies have been calling that now we're being fucking replaced. 0.99

03:05:37.520 And, 0.98

03:05:38.060 uh,

03:05:38.380 the,

03:05:38.700 the geoengineering,

03:05:39.700 those are the two things that I get a lot to hear from the normies.

03:05:43.280 Okay.

03:05:43.760 Here's a video.

03:05:50.500 Oh,

03:05:56.440 Oh,

03:05:57.080 Oh,

03:05:58.380 Oh,

03:05:58.820 Oh.

03:06:01.440 Oh,

03:06:01.900 Oh,

03:06:02.520 Oh,

03:06:03.480 Oh,

03:06:03.820 Oh,

03:06:05.180 Oh,

03:06:05.600 Oh,

03:06:14.740 Oh,

03:06:15.860 Oh,

03:06:18.340 Oh,

03:06:18.820 Now, at what point

03:06:46.280 is that not a form

03:06:48.820 of animal abuse as well?

03:06:50.660 That's what I want to know.

03:06:53.260 Bringing those horses into that

03:06:54.840 situation

03:06:55.580 to me is unnecessary.

03:06:58.920 I know they're newfies, but yeah, they are animals. 1.00

03:07:01.040 I think the cops do it on purpose.

03:07:02.760 The purpose of the agitate the horse so they can...

03:07:04.720 The horse will do something so they have plausible 0.98

03:07:06.520 fucking denial. 0.98

03:07:09.100 That's obvious, but 1.00

03:07:10.340 it's just asinine that we allow it 0.96

03:07:13.020 and it's also asinine that it is

03:07:14.960 only ever used

03:07:16.180 against those that would be considered

03:07:19.040 patriotic, against those who

03:07:21.180 are fighting for a better

03:07:23.140 country here, and yes,

03:07:25.300 those that are white. 1.00

03:07:26.580 I didn't see the fucking... 1.00

03:07:27.660 That's not entirely true. 1.00

03:07:28.960 That woman was brown. 1.00

03:07:31.220 She was a First Nation, wasn't she?

03:07:32.660 Good point.

03:07:33.700 She was on the wrong side of things.

03:07:36.700 Yes.

03:07:37.860 She was an anomaly. 0.87

03:07:39.760 You didn't see them launch the mounted police

03:07:41.880 at the Calistani protest

03:07:44.180 and you didn't see the mounted 0.99

03:07:45.740 police during all the fucking 1.00

03:07:47.680 Palestinians and the fucking Jews going at it. 1.00

03:07:50.660 No, no, no, no. 1.00

03:07:51.620 But when it's Canadians, 0.98

03:07:53.280 like Newfoundlanders and like people 1.00

03:07:54.980 with the fucking trucker convoy, 1.00

03:07:56.140 oh, let's send in the fucking horses. 1.00

03:07:57.820 Let's do it. 1.00

03:07:58.380 Yeah, fuck that. 1.00

03:07:59.760 And I still think that that guy... 1.00

03:08:01.480 I still think that guy's dead.

03:08:03.220 The other guy's dead.

03:08:04.220 I think that with the point of saying,

03:08:05.300 no, body's alive.

03:08:06.260 Well, I don't believe that.

03:08:07.400 No, but that's just me.

03:08:09.700 I think he...

03:08:10.220 I think he might...

03:08:11.620 If he is alive,

03:08:12.300 he got an NDA

03:08:12.960 and he's been paid off

03:08:14.520 and he's been told 0.99

03:08:15.540 don't fucking talk 0.99

03:08:16.380 or you owe us 1.00

03:08:16.940 the million bucks

03:08:17.800 or whatever.

03:08:19.120 I just wonder

03:08:20.000 at what point

03:08:20.740 do these cops not realize

03:08:22.280 they're going to push too far.

03:08:25.400 Well, do you remember

03:08:25.920 not too long ago

03:08:26.860 they are within our communities

03:08:28.340 and then we are going to make

03:08:29.880 life a living 0.99

03:08:31.140 fucking 1.00

03:08:32.120 hell 1.00

03:08:33.320 on that.

03:08:34.300 I think that's why 0.99

03:08:34.900 they lifted all the fucking 0.94

03:08:36.000 all the standards 0.88

03:08:38.020 for the military and police

03:08:39.240 because they need

03:08:40.100 they need to fill it back up 1.00

03:08:41.380 with the fucking immigrants 1.00

03:08:42.240 because they know 1.00

03:08:42.940 that's coming.

03:08:44.060 Well, I am legitimately

03:08:45.560 getting to a point 0.99

03:08:46.500 where it's time to fucking 0.99

03:08:47.520 go to that sunshine list, 1.00

03:08:49.300 find all your fucking 1.00

03:08:50.040 local cops, 1.00

03:08:51.360 have their fucking addresses 1.00

03:08:52.600 and shit posted 1.00

03:08:53.480 and start making life 0.99

03:08:54.440 just a little uncomfortable.

03:08:55.820 I'm not talking about violence.

03:08:57.080 I'm not talking about,

03:08:58.060 you know,

03:08:58.840 doing anything like that,

03:09:00.060 but letting them know

03:09:01.240 that they are not welcome

03:09:02.240 anymore.

03:09:03.860 Right?

03:09:04.340 That if you're going

03:09:06.100 to continue

03:09:06.780 to attack

03:09:07.500 your own citizenry,

03:09:08.720 you can go 1.00

03:09:09.460 fuck yourself, 1.00

03:09:10.980 get the fuck 1.00

03:09:11.840 out of the community. 0.99

03:09:13.080 The social contract

03:09:14.160 between the establishment

03:09:15.600 and the citizenry,

03:09:18.040 the contract

03:09:18.780 that was

03:09:19.280 written between us

03:09:21.060 in the philosophical sense

03:09:22.440 that where we allowed

03:09:23.740 to be,

03:09:24.280 where we allowed them

03:09:25.420 to govern us,

03:09:26.580 they broke that contract.

03:09:28.680 So we,

03:09:30.360 under a free people,

03:09:31.620 where we are born free, 0.99

03:09:33.200 and we will fucking 1.00

03:09:34.520 die free. 1.00

03:09:35.960 It is our duty 1.00

03:09:36.980 and in our motherfucking 0.98

03:09:38.240 right to take it back. 0.97

03:09:42.020 Well,

03:09:42.440 and it's just,

03:09:42.920 it's getting really annoying

03:09:43.860 when you can tell

03:09:44.540 that it's not being

03:09:45.200 evenly applied,

03:09:46.120 right?

03:09:47.240 Uncle Kenny's saying

03:09:48.080 that he talked,

03:09:48.940 sorry,

03:09:49.220 I didn't mean to interrupt you,

03:09:49.720 Johnny,

03:09:49.960 Uncle Kenny here saying

03:09:50.920 he talked to his nephew

03:09:52.320 on Twitter

03:09:53.100 and he said he was banged up,

03:09:54.220 but okay.

03:09:54.740 Oh,

03:09:54.940 okay,

03:09:55.140 so the guy is alive.

03:09:56.040 Okay.

03:09:56.720 Sorry.

03:09:57.580 Okay,

03:09:58.040 sorry.

03:09:58.220 But it's just,

03:09:59.040 it's, 0.95

03:09:59.740 it is utterly ridiculous 0.66

03:10:01.100 because you can,

03:10:02.500 when it's no longer

03:10:03.520 being evenly applied,

03:10:05.000 that's where the frustration

03:10:05.900 comes in,

03:10:06.760 right?

03:10:07.040 Like you've got,

03:10:08.180 in Newfoundland,

03:10:08.800 you've just got guys 1.00

03:10:09.600 who just want to fucking 0.99

03:10:10.640 live, 0.99

03:10:11.840 right?

03:10:12.100 They want to make a living,

03:10:13.160 they want to sell 1.00

03:10:13.720 their fucking product, 1.00

03:10:15.120 and they're being told no. 1.00

03:10:16.460 I'm trying not to fucking live there. 0.99

03:10:17.460 Yeah. 0.98

03:10:17.860 And yeah, 0.99

03:10:18.560 and they're getting fucking, 0.99

03:10:19.700 the horses brought in 1.00

03:10:21.440 and bullshit happening, 0.98

03:10:23.780 whereas you've got a bunch 1.00

03:10:24.800 of moronic fucking Eritreans 1.00

03:10:26.360 with very fucking low IQ 1.00

03:10:27.980 causing violence in the street, 1.00

03:10:30.240 or you have the fucking 1.00

03:10:31.060 Calistanis that somehow think 1.00

03:10:33.940 that they can create 1.00

03:10:34.520 a fucking state here, 1.00

03:10:35.740 or you have these idiot 1.00

03:10:36.740 fucking Palestinian 1.00

03:10:37.720 and Israeli supporters 1.00

03:10:38.820 that are fighting over 1.00

03:10:39.620 a fucking war 1.00

03:10:40.320 that isn't even happening here, 0.99

03:10:41.700 and they're allowed to do 0.95

03:10:42.880 whatever the fuck it is 0.99

03:10:43.780 that they want. 1.00

03:10:45.240 Yeah. 0.99

03:10:46.440 That is ridiculous. 0.99

03:10:47.700 It is. 0.99

03:10:48.220 And they just expect us

03:10:49.160 to sit back as, 1.00

03:10:50.040 as naturally born fucking Canadians 1.00

03:10:52.340 and just allow our country 1.00

03:10:54.340 to be fucking run over 1.00

03:10:55.440 and taken, 1.00

03:10:56.140 taken the fuck over. 0.99

03:10:57.440 They just expect us 0.99

03:10:58.820 to allow that.

03:11:01.780 Think again, guys.

03:11:03.420 Think again.

03:11:05.000 And that's what I've been

03:11:05.800 trying to tell people.

03:11:06.480 I've been saying

03:11:06.940 these three words

03:11:08.120 for a long time.

03:11:10.680 Had enough yet?

03:11:13.740 And that's what I've been saying

03:11:15.680 over here for years.

03:11:17.480 Had enough yet?

03:11:19.120 And I'll post stuff 0.99

03:11:21.020 on fucking all the social media 0.98

03:11:22.300 a lot of times, 0.98

03:11:22.960 and those are the very 0.99

03:11:23.640 three fucking words. 0.99

03:11:24.640 We're at the end 1.00

03:11:25.040 of something else.

03:11:25.720 Had enough yet?

03:11:30.180 So.

03:11:31.540 Yeah.

03:11:32.680 You're not wrong.

03:11:34.240 No.

03:11:35.240 Because I've,

03:11:35.880 I've been fed up 0.99

03:11:37.280 for fucking years. 0.99

03:11:38.080 I've been on a war footing 1.00

03:11:38.880 since fucking March, 0.99

03:11:39.920 March of 2020. 0.99

03:11:42.360 Literal war footing.

03:11:43.320 Like, I've been literally,

03:11:44.060 I drive down the roads

03:11:45.160 every day.

03:11:46.720 And when I'm driving

03:11:47.620 on the road,

03:11:47.980 do you know how many times

03:11:48.460 I've had visions

03:11:49.140 where I've been driving

03:11:49.880 down the road,

03:11:50.460 and I'm not seeing

03:11:51.480 fields and cars.

03:11:52.320 No, I'm seeing fire.

03:11:55.200 I'm not kidding.

03:11:56.060 Like, I'm not just saying that.

03:11:57.160 Like, I actually see

03:11:58.140 these things.

03:11:59.940 And,

03:12:00.340 and this has been

03:12:01.300 for the past few years now,

03:12:02.360 so this is what I mean.

03:12:03.860 I've been on this

03:12:04.860 footing for,

03:12:05.740 like,

03:12:06.420 it's almost like

03:12:07.220 this going through

03:12:07.840 the motion.

03:12:09.100 You know what I mean?

03:12:09.740 That's why I tell 1.00

03:12:10.720 my fucking son 1.00

03:12:11.380 it's so important. 1.00

03:12:12.220 He sticks with boxing

03:12:13.080 and training

03:12:13.660 and jiu-jitsu.

03:12:14.900 I said,

03:12:15.300 they're going to 1.00

03:12:15.920 fucking try and draft you. 0.99

03:12:18.600 And you need to have 0.99

03:12:19.240 strength and skills

03:12:20.680 that when you do

03:12:21.900 get drafted,

03:12:22.740 you know,

03:12:23.200 like.

03:12:25.620 Strength and skills.

03:12:26.540 Here's how you can tell.

03:12:28.380 Here's how you can tell

03:12:29.340 something is definitely

03:12:30.160 going to be happening

03:12:30.920 and it's going to be 0.99

03:12:31.800 happening pretty fucking 0.94

03:12:32.740 soon is that suddenly 0.95

03:12:34.060 the military commercials

03:12:35.280 are suddenly showing

03:12:37.040 the cool side

03:12:37.980 of the military

03:12:39.200 and they're showing

03:12:40.220 the white side

03:12:41.040 of the military as well.

03:12:43.180 And suddenly

03:12:44.120 it isn't about

03:12:44.920 the,

03:12:45.860 like,

03:12:46.220 behind the scenes

03:12:47.000 is definitely about 0.99

03:12:47.840 all the fucking 1.00

03:12:48.280 diversity bullshit, 1.00

03:12:49.140 but the ads that 1.00

03:12:50.500 they're going to

03:12:50.860 pump out right now,

03:12:52.280 they are trying to

03:12:53.700 target market those

03:12:55.280 who are not

03:12:56.000 in that diversity side 1.00

03:12:57.300 because they fucking 1.00

03:12:57.960 know goddamn well 1.00

03:12:58.940 if we're going to 0.99

03:12:59.620 go to war, 0.91

03:13:00.240 we cannot use these 1.00

03:13:01.100 fucking diversity hires. 1.00

03:13:02.440 We will be fucked. 1.00

03:13:05.540 What do they do 1.00

03:13:06.480 if they refuse

03:13:07.040 to draft these posts?

03:13:08.080 They forcefully

03:13:09.380 take you.

03:13:11.220 Yeah,

03:13:11.760 exactly.

03:13:12.060 That's what a draft is.

03:13:13.420 Yeah,

03:13:13.800 and that,

03:13:14.380 and the people

03:13:15.440 better understand

03:13:16.120 in this country,

03:13:16.740 the moment they

03:13:17.160 bring a draft

03:13:17.720 into this country,

03:13:19.300 our citizens

03:13:20.320 won't be going

03:13:21.000 to the news.

03:13:21.500 Some of them

03:13:21.820 will willingly go,

03:13:22.560 but any,

03:13:23.240 any citizen 1.00

03:13:23.960 with a fucking brain 1.00

03:13:24.900 is going to be 1.00

03:13:26.460 fighting the draft.

03:13:27.080 I'm not going.

03:13:27.940 No, 1.00

03:13:28.200 fuck that. 1.00

03:13:28.980 Fuck off. 1.00

03:13:29.660 Fuck that. 1.00

03:13:30.340 Some asshole 1.00

03:13:30.900 shows up at my front door 1.00

03:13:31.960 wanting to draft me

03:13:32.700 to send me 1.00

03:13:33.060 to fucking Ukraine. 1.00

03:13:33.780 I can guarantee you 1.00

03:13:34.480 he's going to get 1.00

03:13:34.900 a machete in the throat. 0.98

03:13:36.300 I'm not going to 1.00

03:13:37.040 fight your fucking war. 1.00

03:13:38.040 I don't think 1.00

03:13:38.580 it'll be Ukraine 0.92

03:13:39.200 we're going to.

03:13:40.300 Or whatever the case may be. 0.97

03:13:41.940 There'll be no fucking 0.99

03:13:42.760 recruiter showing it. 0.99

03:13:43.680 Like,

03:13:43.820 I don't have children,

03:13:44.900 but like,

03:13:45.360 I'm like,

03:13:46.000 I'm,

03:13:46.300 I don't know 0.99

03:13:46.820 if it goes to shit, 1.00

03:13:47.840 even my age, 1.00

03:13:48.460 they'll probably be like,

03:13:48.900 you're 46?

03:13:49.800 Yeah,

03:13:50.020 you're still military.

03:13:51.600 I thought that cut off.

03:13:52.720 I guarantee they'll,

03:13:54.340 yeah,

03:13:54.760 go ahead.

03:13:55.040 They'll take her 0.66

03:13:55.520 all the way up to 55,

03:13:56.720 I'm willing to bet.

03:13:57.520 They already are in Ukraine.

03:13:59.120 They're taking,

03:13:59.640 they're taking

03:14:00.100 Down syndrome people, 1.00

03:14:01.340 fucking pregnant women, 1.00

03:14:02.520 fucking senior citizens. 1.00

03:14:04.900 The same guy that said 1.00

03:14:05.600 he cut his fucking kid's finger, 1.00

03:14:07.160 trigger finger off 1.00

03:14:07.920 so he didn't have to go serve.

03:14:09.180 I was like, 1.00

03:14:09.620 holy fuck, 1.00

03:14:10.560 man, 1.00

03:14:10.740 that is so savage.

03:14:12.520 And there's,

03:14:13.140 I've watched

03:14:13.580 countless videos

03:14:14.460 coming out of Ukraine

03:14:15.520 of them forcefully 1.00

03:14:16.340 fucking grabbing guys 0.99

03:14:17.420 right off the streets, 1.00

03:14:18.380 throwing them in the 1.00

03:14:18.940 fucking vans 1.00

03:14:19.560 and shit like that. 1.00

03:14:20.660 Fuck, 1.00

03:14:20.880 they take them 1.00

03:14:21.240 right off buses.

03:14:22.620 Yep,

03:14:23.020 buses.

03:14:23.340 You'd be riding

03:14:23.960 a city bus

03:14:24.560 and suddenly 1.00

03:14:25.120 a fucking recruiter 1.00

03:14:26.320 is just going to 1.00

03:14:26.820 hop on the bus

03:14:27.440 and drag you 1.00

03:14:27.940 right off the fucking bus. 1.00

03:14:29.160 Yeah. 1.00

03:14:29.340 And you're going

03:14:29.860 to the front lines,

03:14:30.460 bud.

03:14:30.980 Yeah,

03:14:31.340 no, 1.00

03:14:31.600 fuck that. 1.00

03:14:32.300 Fuck that. 1.00

03:14:33.320 And we won't, 1.00

03:14:33.800 we won't tolerate

03:14:34.420 that in our own country either.

03:14:35.660 Yeah,

03:14:35.840 I'm not going.

03:14:37.100 Not going to happen.

03:14:38.000 No,

03:14:38.240 I'm not going. 0.99

03:14:38.520 They fucking grabbed me 1.00

03:14:39.460 and I'm not going to tell them. 1.00

03:14:40.940 And I think they also know that. 1.00

03:14:42.380 I fucking hate you, 1.00

03:14:42.920 so fuck off. 1.00

03:14:43.520 I think they also know 1.00

03:14:44.520 that if they were to impose

03:14:46.200 like a conscription

03:14:47.000 or a draft

03:14:47.640 that it would go

03:14:48.400 completely sideways

03:14:49.240 on them 0.99

03:14:49.700 really fucking quick. 0.99

03:14:50.860 So I think that's why 0.98

03:14:51.620 they're replacing 0.99

03:14:52.220 the military with porn. 0.88

03:14:53.920 So what happened 0.67

03:14:54.820 during the Vietnam era

03:14:56.580 when they drafted?

03:14:57.440 I mean,

03:14:57.620 there was a big kickback

03:14:59.140 on a lot of people.

03:15:00.120 Oh, yeah.

03:15:00.560 The U.S.

03:15:01.140 to come to Canada

03:15:01.880 to dodge it.

03:15:02.900 Like my father

03:15:03.380 was one of them.

03:15:04.420 But

03:15:04.440 what

03:15:07.440 I think the thing

03:15:09.560 with back then though

03:15:10.860 is like there was a

03:15:11.900 there was a different view

03:15:13.740 of how the military

03:15:14.780 value to the military.

03:15:16.460 Like it was still considered.

03:15:17.920 I don't feel like

03:15:18.500 the military is considered

03:15:19.400 to be an honorable place

03:15:20.560 to go now.

03:15:21.260 Like back then it was.

03:15:23.220 So I wonder what would happen

03:15:24.420 if they tried to conscription.

03:15:25.440 Like if

03:15:26.120 if there were just

03:15:27.600 like

03:15:28.000 You see what East Coast

03:15:30.660 says here?

03:15:31.180 Maybe the mass migration

03:15:32.240 of males is just

03:15:33.160 recruiting for Canadian

03:15:34.100 military in advance.

03:15:35.220 Not just the Canadian 0.60

03:15:36.020 military.

03:15:36.580 They're also doing this

03:15:37.260 in the United States

03:15:38.000 too.

03:15:38.360 All over Europe.

03:15:39.560 All over

03:15:39.900 all over the Western world

03:15:41.000 they're flowing

03:15:41.400 with military-aged males.

03:15:43.560 Well,

03:15:43.860 it could be for the

03:15:44.800 UN army.

03:15:46.200 That

03:15:46.600 that

03:15:47.560 realistic.

03:15:49.220 Yeah.

03:15:49.400 And as much as people

03:15:51.220 want to say that's

03:15:51.840 a conspiracy theory

03:15:52.720 all they want

03:15:53.220 it's just a fact.

03:15:55.340 Yeah.

03:15:55.560 It's just a fact.

03:15:56.980 Yeah.

03:15:58.300 It's true.

03:16:00.100 It's 100% 0.98

03:16:01.000 fucking fact. 0.99

03:16:02.440 Like when you 0.99

03:16:03.020 when you see

03:16:03.420 remember that video

03:16:04.060 just the other day

03:16:04.800 of all them

03:16:05.460 standing trying to 0.99

03:16:06.020 get that fucking 0.99

03:16:06.580 applying for jobs 1.00

03:16:07.700 inside that LCBO

03:16:08.640 somewhere in southern

03:16:09.300 Ontario I think it was.

03:16:10.720 Every one of them

03:16:11.460 was a guy.

03:16:12.740 I don't think

03:16:13.360 I didn't see one woman

03:16:14.300 in that crowd.

03:16:15.420 Well, no.

03:16:15.720 Because they're not.

03:16:16.380 No, they were all 0.99

03:16:16.900 nuts to butts too. 1.00

03:16:18.060 But

03:16:18.180 and

03:16:19.080 what's really funny

03:16:20.780 about that video

03:16:21.440 though is

03:16:21.820 that's like

03:16:22.400 what a great

03:16:23.040 representation

03:16:23.580 of immigration

03:16:24.400 in Canada.

03:16:25.380 Yeah.

03:16:25.700 Right.

03:16:26.400 All of those videos

03:16:27.560 are.

03:16:27.860 Look at that LCBO

03:16:29.000 yeah.

03:16:29.840 Like look at that

03:16:30.360 LCBO store

03:16:31.200 as the country

03:16:32.100 of Canada

03:16:32.640 and that lineup

03:16:34.040 is all the

03:16:35.580 migrants

03:16:36.040 all the international

03:16:37.020 students

03:16:37.600 all these

03:16:38.100 uncivilized people

03:16:39.060 that are just 0.80

03:16:39.500 trying to shove

03:16:40.360 their way

03:16:41.060 into this country.

03:16:42.820 Oh.

03:16:43.620 I've never seen

03:16:46.740 a better visual

03:16:47.440 representation

03:16:48.080 than that video. 1.00

03:16:49.080 fuck my 1.00

03:16:51.460 Spidey 1.00

03:16:51.840 but that's

03:16:53.560 one of many

03:16:54.260 that's the thing

03:16:55.140 right like those

03:16:55.680 videos are all

03:16:56.460 over the internet

03:16:57.200 right now

03:16:57.740 because that's

03:16:58.620 the way it is

03:16:59.340 everywhere for

03:17:00.160 those low skilled

03:17:01.380 minimum wage

03:17:02.820 jobs that are

03:17:03.900 supposed to be

03:17:04.500 going to

03:17:05.020 teenagers

03:17:05.660 and

03:17:06.700 kids who

03:17:07.720 are entering

03:17:08.320 the workforce

03:17:09.140 factory workers

03:17:10.000 right

03:17:10.800 powerful paychecks

03:17:12.420 common sense

03:17:14.980 bring it home

03:17:17.120 bring it home

03:17:17.740 I was going to

03:17:18.760 say I know

03:17:19.140 there's one more

03:17:19.800 that I'm forgetting

03:17:20.420 here

03:17:21.080 and the both of

03:17:22.140 it say

03:17:22.440 bring it home

03:17:23.780 echo 1.00

03:17:24.120 in fucking stereo 1.00

03:17:25.100 jesus christ 1.00

03:17:26.260 right

03:17:27.260 but

03:17:27.860 we're missing a

03:17:28.560 soundbite of an

03:17:29.240 apple crunching

03:17:29.940 though

03:17:30.580 but it's true

03:17:34.160 my god

03:17:35.220 yeah

03:17:35.480 no it's

03:17:36.300 right 1.00

03:17:36.560 fucking copium 1.00

03:17:38.280 like that's 1.00

03:17:39.240 what their

03:17:39.660 lineups and

03:17:40.480 lineups and

03:17:40.980 lineups of

03:17:41.420 these people

03:17:41.900 who were

03:17:42.320 supposed to

03:17:42.940 be here

03:17:43.420 because they

03:17:44.100 had enough

03:17:44.620 money to

03:17:45.040 come here

03:17:45.600 or they're

03:17:46.420 here because

03:17:47.040 they've come

03:17:47.600 here seeking

03:17:48.060 asylum or

03:17:48.720 as migrants

03:17:49.320 so what

03:17:51.280 we have no

03:17:52.280 jobs why

03:17:52.860 are you here 0.99

03:17:53.500 what the fuck 1.00

03:17:54.760 are you coming 1.00

03:17:55.200 here for if

03:17:55.840 there's no

03:17:56.200 work

03:17:56.620 and you know

03:17:57.420 the other thing

03:18:01.460 that's super

03:18:02.060 ironic about this

03:18:02.980 too is that

03:18:03.960 it's like okay

03:18:04.740 so we're shoving

03:18:05.820 them into all

03:18:06.920 of these retail

03:18:07.900 positions but

03:18:09.100 at the same

03:18:09.720 time we're

03:18:11.940 eliminating all

03:18:13.540 of these retail

03:18:14.320 positions as

03:18:15.140 well with all

03:18:16.920 of our self

03:18:17.520 checkouts or 0.99

03:18:18.440 fucking receipt 1.00

03:18:19.300 scanners or 1.00

03:18:20.220 fucking like at 0.99

03:18:21.240 this point in 0.99

03:18:21.820 time we have

03:18:22.280 basically shown

03:18:23.020 that the retail

03:18:23.620 industry is 0.99

03:18:24.420 absolutely fucking 1.00

03:18:25.520 useless that 0.99

03:18:27.100 not a single 0.96

03:18:28.040 one of you who

03:18:28.800 works in retail

03:18:29.760 is needed because

03:18:30.860 you could be

03:18:31.640 replaced with a

03:18:32.440 machine today

03:18:33.320 yeah or a 1.00

03:18:35.860 fucking jeet 1.00

03:18:36.440 that will work 1.00

03:18:36.860 for minimum

03:18:37.700 wage right

03:18:38.340 yeah that too

03:18:38.960 i'm just gonna

03:18:40.280 say this one

03:18:40.700 last thing i gotta

03:18:41.320 hop off my

03:18:41.900 phone's about to 0.99

03:18:42.460 fucking die i'm 0.99

03:18:43.000 at 19 i didn't 1.00

03:18:44.560 realize that um

03:18:45.500 but basically

03:18:46.380 what's going on in

03:18:47.680 this country is

03:18:49.000 that the

03:18:49.460 establishment is

03:18:50.240 purposely making

03:18:50.900 this country fall

03:18:51.880 on its own 1.00

03:18:52.380 fucking sword 1.00

03:18:53.120 just like what 1.00

03:18:53.940 happened with

03:18:54.400 europe that's

03:18:56.360 exactly what's

03:18:56.960 happening they're

03:18:57.500 purposely and

03:18:58.300 and as long as

03:18:59.520 but i got into

03:19:01.260 it with my wife

03:19:01.780 last night just

03:19:02.300 before bed because

03:19:03.000 she's watching this 1.00

03:19:03.640 fucking stupid 1.00

03:19:04.300 shit on tv and 1.00

03:19:05.680 i'm like i don't 1.00

03:19:06.040 know why you 0.99

03:19:06.560 fucking participate 0.99

03:19:07.800 in this and she's 1.00

03:19:08.580 like what do you

03:19:08.900 mean it's just

03:19:09.700 no mind tv i'm

03:19:10.660 like yeah it's no

03:19:11.760 mind tv like you

03:19:12.740 don't and then she 0.94

03:19:14.260 got pissy about it

03:19:15.080 and mind your own 1.00

03:19:15.980 fucking business i'll 1.00

03:19:16.720 watch what i want 1.00

03:19:17.220 well that's fine but

03:19:18.340 you're just like the 1.00

03:19:19.560 rest of the fucking 1.00

03:19:20.200 canadians who turn 1.00

03:19:21.440 their tv on fucking 1.00

03:19:22.500 close their blinds and 0.99

03:19:23.880 it's all gonna be okay

03:19:24.960 tomorrow it's all gonna

03:19:26.440 be okay because 0.99

03:19:27.880 fucking johnny's got a 1.00

03:19:29.020 new fucking lamborghini 1.00

03:19:30.580 and jill jill over here 1.00

03:19:32.620 is fucking johnny 0.99

03:19:33.820 and johnny's 1.00

03:19:34.560 fucking wait 0.99

03:19:35.840 who's fucking me 1.00

03:19:36.560 no i'm not talking 0.99

03:19:37.700 about you just this 0.99

03:19:38.360 trash tv and i'm 1.00

03:19:41.160 like fuck man i don't 1.00

03:19:42.320 understand how you 1.00

03:19:43.120 how you can be so 1.00

03:19:44.480 intellectually fucking 1.00

03:19:45.660 small to find that to 1.00

03:19:48.580 be entertainment now

03:19:49.480 like with what you

03:19:50.140 know she comes out

03:19:51.780 this morning and 0.99

03:19:52.500 uh fucking kyle 0.99

03:19:53.600 kemper's on with 1.00

03:19:54.420 jason levine like

03:19:55.320 trudeau's brother and

03:19:56.620 i'm watching this

03:19:57.340 interview and it's 0.96

03:19:58.300 pretty fucking good 0.95

03:19:59.360 they don't agree with 0.97

03:20:00.200 everything he says but 0.96

03:20:00.960 it's pretty fucking good 0.96

03:20:01.700 i said oh do you 0.95

03:20:02.220 know who this is

03:20:02.880 she's like i don't 0.99

03:20:03.660 fucking care 0.99

03:20:04.340 like oh okay 1.00

03:20:06.320 yeah

03:20:07.460 i gotta blow my 0.93

03:20:10.980 phone's gonna die

03:20:11.640 but uh thanks for

03:20:12.580 having me on guys 0.98

03:20:13.120 it was fucking 0.97

03:20:13.740 great 0.97

03:20:14.000 that was an

03:20:15.360 awesome dream

03:20:15.940 and uh yeah

03:20:17.760 so good to see you

03:20:18.700 guys i'll uh take

03:20:20.020 it easy

03:20:20.240 i gotta plug my 1.00

03:20:20.960 fucking phone 1.00

03:20:21.400 it's gonna die 1.00

03:20:22.000 cheers

03:20:22.960 see you later 0.98

03:20:23.280 so i got fucking 0.99

03:20:27.000 nothing better to do 0.97

03:20:27.660 right now i was

03:20:28.140 trying to think of

03:20:28.660 what i should be

03:20:29.260 doing but 1.00

03:20:29.660 fuck it 1.00

03:20:30.700 it's only one o'clock 1.00

03:20:31.800 here so hey i was

03:20:32.660 i was smart and i

03:20:33.420 remembered to take some

03:20:34.180 beef out of the freezer

03:20:34.940 so i'm uh i'm ahead of

03:20:36.180 the game right now

03:20:37.300 i did too

03:20:37.940 all right

03:20:39.000 making tacos for

03:20:39.920 dinner tonight

03:20:40.420 yeah see that's that's

03:20:41.420 the one nice thing about

03:20:42.440 the days that his dad

03:20:43.420 doesn't take them for

03:20:44.360 dinner is it means that

03:20:45.360 i'll actually make a

03:20:46.700 dinner

03:20:46.940 you have to cook

03:20:47.900 yeah like no more no

03:20:49.400 more sour keys for 0.75

03:20:50.480 today

03:20:50.820 yeah legitimately

03:20:52.260 grown men eating

03:20:54.320 sour keys for dinner 0.99

03:20:55.320 is ridiculous 0.94

03:20:55.880 my wife was nice she 1.00

03:20:59.720 bought pizza last night

03:21:00.580 for dinner i was kind

03:21:01.440 of shocked

03:21:01.840 that's actually what i

03:21:02.840 did too uh yesterday

03:21:04.060 we know we got we got

03:21:06.560 a like a mom-pah shop

03:21:08.280 here that does a pretty

03:21:09.320 sweet deal on tuesdays so

03:21:10.640 it's uh well she ordered 0.99

03:21:11.980 pizza from the fucking 1.00

03:21:12.900 jeets down the street 1.00

03:21:13.880 oh no

03:21:14.940 god no 1.00

03:21:15.740 the fucking guy shows 1.00

03:21:16.820 look i i got one it's 1.00

03:21:19.220 uh a six topping large

03:21:20.740 for 16.99 on tuesdays so

03:21:22.820 i was like yeah yeah i'm in

03:21:24.100 and it's pretty damn good

03:21:25.020 too that's the other

03:21:25.840 thing so

03:21:26.420 yeah

03:21:27.060 no but how long is it

03:21:29.320 before you're afraid to

03:21:30.220 order a pizza because the 1.00

03:21:31.220 fucking indian guy that's 1.00

03:21:32.060 delivering it's going to 1.00

03:21:32.900 decide he wants a little 1.00

03:21:34.000 taste of your fucking pie 1.00

03:21:35.160 right 1.00

03:21:35.660 well and i and like that's

03:21:38.480 also why i will not use

03:21:40.000 skip the dishes uber eats 1.00

03:21:41.220 or any of that i i don't

03:21:42.360 trust that

03:21:42.940 um it's bad enough that

03:21:44.580 like i if i try to use

03:21:46.220 dominoes which i don't like 0.98

03:21:47.660 to because it is fucking 1.00

03:21:48.660 garbage but every once in a 1.00

03:21:50.180 while it's just it seems 0.99

03:21:51.360 easier

03:21:51.740 so we'll do that

03:21:53.200 but it's always you know

03:21:55.500 at least with that i can

03:21:56.600 trust it a little more

03:21:57.560 because

03:21:57.960 the whole

03:21:59.560 you know i was thinking 1.00

03:22:00.280 about the fucking fag that 1.00

03:22:01.980 works at the liquor store 1.00

03:22:03.060 who still wears a mask

03:22:04.760 yeah

03:22:05.800 right he works there

03:22:07.280 he's a white guy he's a 1.00

03:22:08.460 fucking 1.00

03:22:08.680 little skinny fucking 1.00

03:22:10.420 they're my favorite 1.00

03:22:11.520 but he's got a mask on

03:22:13.720 and i'm thinking you're 0.99

03:22:14.740 fucking handling my 0.99

03:22:15.680 bottle for starters with 1.00

03:22:16.860 bare hands 1.00

03:22:17.500 are you fucking shedding on 1.00

03:22:19.100 my bottle like i'm almost 1.00

03:22:19.940 thinking i should ask for a

03:22:20.800 different person

03:22:21.340 because obviously this guy's 0.99

03:22:22.600 fucked well they're probably 1.00

03:22:23.300 all jabbed at the government 0.99

03:22:24.420 liquor store but guaranteed 1.00

03:22:25.560 but they're fucking shedding 0.98

03:22:27.760 all over my food and like do 0.99

03:22:30.180 i not have the right to ask 0.99

03:22:31.180 them to put on some fucking 0.99

03:22:32.040 sanitation gloves or like 0.99

03:22:33.700 actually i had to laugh uh the

03:22:36.420 other day i went to the walmart

03:22:38.240 and this woman come in mask and 1.00

03:22:43.520 fucking plastic baggy gloves 1.00

03:22:46.360 yeah yep to grab her cart and i 0.99

03:22:49.660 fucking like i'm sorry i can't 0.96

03:22:53.000 hide it anymore i very audibly 0.97

03:22:55.940 started laughing laughing yeah

03:22:58.220 totally and i was just like what 0.98

03:23:00.360 the fuck and it's just like on on 0.97

03:23:02.100 my on my bus ride home on the 1.00

03:23:03.960 weekend uh the woman in front of 0.78

03:23:05.920 me sitting on the bus wearing a mask

03:23:08.500 i'm like what like what is wrong

03:23:10.480 with you people like the logic behind

03:23:13.780 this escapes me hard because

03:23:16.460 either you believe in the vaccine

03:23:20.140 right or you don't and if you

03:23:24.460 didn't why did you take it and if

03:23:27.120 you do why are you wearing a mask 1.00

03:23:29.560 yeah what are you doing the fuck 0.99

03:23:32.280 yeah at this point it's weird it is 0.99

03:23:35.540 it's it doesn't make sense like it

03:23:38.000 maybe made sense before but now it

03:23:39.980 like i mean i don't mean it made

03:23:42.140 sense before but like to them it

03:23:43.840 made sense before but now it's like

03:23:46.380 so why did you get

03:23:47.460 hey uncle kenny's comment there

03:23:50.400 what i can't see the comments

03:23:52.840 i lost yeah yeah my chat's not

03:23:55.460 updating either i got it on my phone

03:23:56.900 but he says uh the jeets will 0.99

03:23:58.440 masturbate on island jason's pizza 1.00

03:24:00.400 like but okay there's a fucking 0.99

03:24:03.840 reality because because they they 0.99

03:24:05.780 know i fucking it no but the last 0.99

03:24:07.720 time he was here i i tipped the guy 0.98

03:24:09.080 10 bucks because he was white so i'm 1.00

03:24:10.920 sure he went back to the fucking 1.00

03:24:11.980 store instead said oh this guy's a 1.00

03:24:13.920 racist pig let's fuck let's fuck 1.00

03:24:16.700 with this guy here's some little 1.00

03:24:17.960 extra sauce gross yeah yeah kenny

03:24:20.720 says it's not like it hasn't happened

03:24:22.180 before but i i believe that he

03:24:23.900 actually asked for it before though i

03:24:25.740 think that's the difference

03:24:26.580 some some butter chicken pizza 0.99

03:24:32.060 oh my fucking god yeah you know 0.99

03:24:34.200 that's the other thing i noticed so 0.98

03:24:35.820 here's a go i walked into a couple of

03:24:40.000 grocery stores locally last week and i

03:24:44.200 was i'm shocked because

03:24:47.400 oh i i was irritated and shocked at the

03:24:52.360 same time because i thought no i can't

03:24:55.400 i can't believe this is happening here

03:24:57.560 but like at the end of every single 0.99

03:24:59.680 aisle was a display fuck and every 1.00

03:25:03.560 single display had indian shit on the 1.00

03:25:05.560 end of it like not literal shit i mean 0.99

03:25:07.780 like yeah you do need to clarify yeah 0.95

03:25:10.920 i know so but it was like an indian 0.99

03:25:13.260 snack or an indian drink or an indian

03:25:15.080 and every single at the end of every

03:25:17.320 aisle and i was like it's because it's

03:25:19.300 ramadan or whatever right whatever the 0.95

03:25:22.640 fuck i don't know what the whatever but 0.96

03:25:24.760 i was like but why though can't we just 0.99

03:25:29.360 have like can't it just be a display

03:25:31.600 like for easter right there why not just 0.99

03:25:34.640 have a fucking aisle 0.97

03:25:35.480 like i mean really though like and the 0.99

03:25:40.440 thing is is that they're full because

03:25:42.520 nobody's touching them like nobody's

03:25:44.120 actually buying any of the stuff because

03:25:45.760 that demographic doesn't exist here 0.97

03:25:47.840 so i was like what the fuck like are we 0.98

03:25:50.600 trying to get people to come here now 0.99

03:25:52.280 no well it's like that they have deal

03:25:54.340 wally uh whatever it's called the

03:25:56.420 wally or whatever they're the wally but

03:25:58.580 then they so listen to this so i'm

03:26:00.960 looking at i like red onions i buy red 0.97

03:26:03.160 onions they're not fucking cheap and 0.96

03:26:04.660 half the time they're rotten but diwali 1.00

03:26:06.460 comes along and now you can buy a 50

03:26:08.080 pound bag of them for 10 bucks and 0.98

03:26:10.000 they're fucking beautiful it's like what 0.99

03:26:11.260 the fuck why didn't you have this all 0.99

03:26:13.040 the time 0.99

03:26:13.460 i was in canadian tire the other day and

03:26:16.480 this guy come coming out of the store

03:26:17.720 with a bag of charcoal in front of me and

03:26:19.600 he's like yeah it's 40 bucks i was like 0.92

03:26:21.180 holy fuck right this is on thursday so me 0.90

03:26:23.600 my son are in there uh i guess on sunday 0.99

03:26:26.140 and i saw the fucking charcoal with 14 0.96

03:26:28.620 bucks the same bag buddy paid 44 and and 0.99

03:26:31.640 i pointed it out to my son because i'm

03:26:33.200 always noticing things with him now and

03:26:35.360 i said you know why they did that because 0.96

03:26:36.960 nobody fucking barbecues on sunday they 0.99

03:26:39.060 barbecue on friday and fucking saturday so 0.99

03:26:41.560 they jack the fucking price up for the 0.99

03:26:43.140 white man and he's like oh what what i 1.00

03:26:45.620 shouldn't tell him all that shit but i 1.00

03:26:46.780 do but it's true it's fucking true that's 0.99

03:26:50.360 funny i just want to get to this uh 0.85

03:26:52.460 this burning question from east coast 0.99

03:26:55.180 canadian because he's such a fucking 1.00

03:26:56.920 deep thinker and he has the greatest 0.99

03:26:59.900 fucking questions ever okay sometimes i 0.99

03:27:03.820 wonder if they make camel jerky in the 1.00

03:27:06.780 middle east

03:27:07.420 well you know why they're called the 0.99

03:27:10.900 fucking ships of the desert right 1.00

03:27:12.320 because they're full of semen they're 1.00

03:27:15.120 full of arab semen that's why yeah 1.00

03:27:17.140 there's that too there is that too 0.99

03:27:20.820 we've got to go off the rails at least

03:27:25.140 once right i think that's like a rule 0.99

03:27:27.280 i gotta find my camel piss fucking at 0.99

03:27:30.140 some point oh my god my uh my my 50 0.99

03:27:35.420 jeets could fit in their memes doing

03:27:37.340 pretty good actually i like that always a

03:27:40.140 good one yeah that was well i've been

03:27:42.180 wanting to make that one for a while too

03:27:43.760 because i i've always thought about

03:27:45.200 every time we talk about how many 0.99

03:27:46.520 fucking east indians live in one single 1.00

03:27:48.920 apartment my mind has always gone 1.00

03:27:51.020 straight to the car salesman meme

03:27:52.940 you should do one you should do one

03:27:55.240 with a camera too like with a toyota

03:27:57.380 camera and the you know and him like

03:28:00.380 slapping the roof he can fit 50 jeans

03:28:02.620 on here you can fit 50 doordash

03:28:04.960 drivers in this thing right well

03:28:07.920 doordash logo on the front of it like 0.98

03:28:10.200 they do on fucking race car like on the 0.98

03:28:12.040 nascars 0.99

03:28:12.980 doordash skip the dishes uber eats 1.00

03:28:15.800 actually

03:28:16.700 yeah could use could use an 18

03:28:19.520 wheeler

03:28:19.980 because they really do do that i think

03:28:23.180 that would be more for where there is

03:28:24.680 like numerous of them inside one truck

03:28:27.300 so they can just drive

03:28:28.260 you know how many jeez you can fit in a

03:28:30.480 volkswagen bug you get four in the back

03:28:33.880 seat two in the front seat and six

03:28:36.000 million in the ashtray

03:28:37.020 good times good times

03:28:43.480 might be true

03:28:46.840 east coast says they're missing the tips

03:28:50.740 that's that's why you don't see jewish 1.00

03:28:56.080 delivery drivers they can't accept tips

03:28:58.180 yep that's a little bit of a stretch but

03:29:02.900 yep

03:29:03.280 they take tips just in their mouth

03:29:07.220 hey hey it had to devolve at some point

03:29:14.000 sir

03:29:14.160 why do we have to go to oil jokes i mean

03:29:16.260 well because we have been incredibly

03:29:18.900 serious all afternoon so i mean it has to

03:29:22.460 come out at some point

03:29:23.460 totally not to mention we've got his

03:29:25.680 first canadian in our chat so like he

03:29:28.040 was a he was bound to to steer this in

03:29:32.120 a direction um that went this way which i

03:29:36.440 appreciate by the way east coast

03:29:38.060 definitely i'm not funny today i thought

03:29:42.460 he was promising us another movie yeah

03:29:45.640 right

03:29:45.960 and what's that uh koala mama 4 p.m is

03:29:49.860 the new 4 a.m 1.00

03:29:50.800 yeah it's almost 4 20 oh yeah fuck i 0.99

03:29:54.600 guess i better 0.98

03:29:55.120 speaking of tips any updates on jeff

03:30:00.620 that's funny i have no idea

03:30:02.840 that's funny ha ha that is a good one 0.98

03:30:05.800 don't don't fucking apologize east coast 0.97

03:30:09.840 we love you bud we love you always 0.98

03:30:12.340 yeah and like i said we've been serious

03:30:15.260 long enough that we can we can have a

03:30:17.600 little levity here you know it's okay

03:30:20.900 okay i found it 0.95

03:30:22.500 fucking right

03:30:23.380 uh yeah it says jeff uploaded from the 0.98

03:30:28.220 hospital

03:30:28.680 go check his channel

03:30:29.920 that's from koala mama so

03:30:32.040 there you go i'm guessing i'm guessing 1.00

03:30:33.600 he has a working penis 1.00

03:30:34.920 boom der bar 1.00

03:30:36.180 oh look it's 1.00

03:30:37.400 steer penis 1.00

03:30:38.740 you didn't have to cut 1.00

03:30:41.680 me off

03:30:42.480 i don't even know sometimes how i have

03:30:46.280 conversations

03:30:46.900 don't be afraid to cut people off 0.98

03:30:48.860 larena bobbit 0.99

03:30:49.920 yeah

03:30:50.880 i gotta

03:30:51.980 conversely don't be afraid to reconnect

03:30:54.360 john wayne bobbit

03:30:55.980 there's my camel piss uh video oh no 0.99

03:31:01.780 is it the black girl on the oh no never mind 1.00

03:31:07.080 anybody see that video 0.98

03:31:09.280 okay here we go

03:31:12.280 we're not playing that one johnny

03:31:14.080 pageant is a derogatory term to address pakistanis who claim arab ancestry such as purash despite 0.79

03:31:22.700 engaging in incest beggery stone pelting goat molestation and camel piss drinking that 0.99

03:31:30.240 pageant had a good evening he took three shots of camel piss hurled stones at four buildings 0.78

03:31:37.920 and violated five goats before calling it a night

03:31:41.080 right you think they think they have a steamy cup of camel piss or do they do they refrigerate it 1.00

03:31:50.500 they don't refrigerate shit 1.00

03:31:52.300 bruh 1.00

03:31:53.040 well i know they don't refrigerate shit we're talking piss 1.00

03:31:56.420 bruh 1.00

03:31:57.040 comes out fresh

03:31:59.840 break it right out of the fountain

03:32:02.340 stop

03:32:04.000 no whizzing the camel piss 1.00

03:32:07.760 wheeze the camel

03:32:10.620 i'll come back when you guys are behaved

03:32:15.220 how come it's all creamy

03:32:16.620 that's funny oh oh east coast with a great idea piss ice cubes

03:32:23.140 oh my god

03:32:24.960 i'm gonna start doing that and i'll invite some liberal people over

03:32:30.140 be like hey you want to come have a drink

03:32:31.880 piss cubes

03:32:35.820 just make a couple lemonade cubes 0.72

03:32:43.280 yeah right

03:32:45.160 stop it 0.99

03:32:46.100 what the fuck's this oh sorry 1.00

03:32:47.780 yeah my my god how this has devolved let me tell you 0.99

03:32:50.880 i was a little dehydrated when i made those ice cubes

03:32:53.180 oh you see you see that one video though there was a video on twitter that i saw last night i can't i think i retweeted it at some point i don't know maybe i didn't but uh it was like some black woman walking in a mall and then she like turns the corner gets onto a fucking escalator and there's nobody around so she just like shoves her underwear over and starts pissing out behind her on the on the escalator 0.99

03:33:15.640 i've seen some fucking white chick in walmart like i didn't see it i saw a video of it but she just basically pulls her panties to the side and fucking squats and squirts all over the fucking meat freezer and i'm just like what the fuck she doesn't even wipe her ass she just pulls her pants back on 1.00

03:33:29.980 fucking vegans 1.00

03:33:31.260 oh my god 1.00

03:33:32.480 it was fucking disgusting 1.00

03:33:34.220 what is wrong with people 1.00

03:33:35.780 people do some fucked up shit man 1.00

03:33:37.760 let me tell you 1.00

03:33:38.720 they do some weird weird shit around here 0.99

03:33:42.320 we actually had uh we had a woman 0.95

03:33:44.160 oh i found it

03:33:44.940 i didn't even have to finish typing it in

03:33:47.060 i found it

03:33:47.660 that's funny

03:33:49.420 now we had a woman here that would like literally walk around town naked 1.00

03:33:53.040 now obviously as you would expect

03:33:54.740 there are some mental health issues

03:33:56.420 and some drug addiction issues there

03:33:58.500 but yeah she would just randomly show up places 1.00

03:34:01.320 and like rip her fucking top off 1.00

03:34:03.080 and just 1.00

03:34:03.660 it's like there'd be times where she would be literally just naked

03:34:08.160 on the sidewalk

03:34:10.420 just walking down the road 0.99

03:34:12.100 that's fucking gross 0.99

03:34:13.540 here you go 1.00

03:34:16.920 sarah pay attention

03:34:18.060 yeah you better watch this

03:34:19.560 oh my god

03:34:20.740 oh look at that

03:34:22.700 oh my wow

03:34:25.000 oh my god

03:34:26.500 jesus

03:34:28.720 jesus

03:34:31.080 clean up aisle six

03:34:34.700 like and there is

03:34:36.240 no that's probably aisle two

03:34:37.320 but there is no way

03:34:38.740 um

03:34:39.740 that there isn't like a bathroom

03:34:41.460 that you could ask to use there

03:34:43.080 right

03:34:43.980 there's no way

03:34:45.340 but she's probably like

03:34:46.460 no the bathroom's gross

03:34:47.340 i don't want to use that 0.87

03:34:48.100 it stinks in there 0.99

03:34:48.880 what the fuck 1.00

03:34:49.960 gross compared to what 1.00

03:34:51.840 i would rather hover in a dirty bathroom 1.00

03:34:54.800 than fucking 1.00

03:34:55.640 shit in the aisle 1.00

03:34:57.060 or hold it 1.00

03:34:58.480 yeah or hold it

03:35:00.440 whichever 0.67

03:35:00.780 that is disgusting

03:35:01.980 actually i did make the mistake

03:35:04.440 uh on the bus home

03:35:06.200 uh on the weekend

03:35:07.360 uh i had a lot of coffee

03:35:10.080 before i had gotten onto this bus

03:35:12.180 and i really really really really had to pee

03:35:15.380 and i looked back

03:35:17.240 and i noticed that there is a bathroom

03:35:18.840 so i was like all right 1.00

03:35:20.220 fuck it 0.99

03:35:20.920 i'm going 1.00

03:35:21.840 and man was that

03:35:24.260 a terrible terrible

03:35:25.420 adventure

03:35:26.580 um

03:35:27.840 take a

03:35:28.680 the the smell of like a dirty

03:35:30.420 cat litter box

03:35:31.480 and multiply that

03:35:32.540 like five to ten times

03:35:33.940 and yeah 1.00

03:35:35.680 holy fuck 0.99

03:35:37.060 i had to like hold my breath 0.99

03:35:37.900 the whole time 0.99

03:35:38.500 don't google shitting in walmart 0.99

03:35:40.460 yeah please don't 0.99

03:35:41.900 please don't

03:35:42.820 please don't

03:35:43.820 please don't

03:35:44.820 if we could offer anybody

03:35:46.880 watching any tips

03:35:48.240 do not google people 0.89

03:35:49.720 shitting in walmart 0.99

03:35:50.520 that's 0.99

03:35:50.940 don't

03:35:51.520 yeah

03:35:53.240 kind of makes you not want to go to walmart anymore

03:35:55.560 i don't ever want to go to walmart ever

03:35:58.080 regularly

03:35:58.580 i don't go

03:35:59.220 i don't go to walmart

03:36:00.160 no 0.99

03:36:00.940 not unless i gotta take a shit 1.00

03:36:02.840 oh jesus 0.99

03:36:09.100 all right

03:36:11.120 you can't do it

03:36:11.480 you can't do it

03:36:12.600 people at walmart

03:36:13.260 all right

03:36:13.880 yep

03:36:14.260 good times

03:36:16.940 i need some cannabis

03:36:19.920 what do we got going on

03:36:21.440 what do we got going on in the chat

03:36:21.940 now

03:36:22.420 i don't have the chat

03:36:24.200 so

03:36:24.540 yeah koala mama 0.84

03:36:25.800 now what am i supposed to do 1.00

03:36:27.180 fuck i don't know 1.00

03:36:28.780 i guess only go to walmart 1.00

03:36:30.880 if you need to shit 1.00

03:36:31.640 only if you need to shit 1.00

03:36:33.460 yeah 1.00

03:36:34.100 i just want

03:36:34.780 make sure to go to aisle two 1.00

03:36:37.220 that's apparently where you shit 0.99

03:36:39.780 right 0.98

03:36:40.320 it's the number two

03:36:41.040 oh my phone's gonna die 0.99

03:36:43.340 that's why it's being a dick 0.99

03:36:44.580 all right 0.99

03:36:45.400 what's tom saying here

03:36:49.040 just goes to show

03:36:49.940 how much humanity

03:36:51.160 has devolved

03:36:52.360 yeah

03:36:52.860 i mean it

03:36:53.820 well

03:36:54.140 it's a mix right

03:36:55.540 because you got mental health

03:36:56.400 you got

03:36:56.900 like that's obviously been

03:36:58.780 something that has been

03:37:00.020 absolutely decimated

03:37:01.560 in society

03:37:02.460 like i

03:37:05.020 it's gotten to the point now

03:37:07.020 where it almost seems like

03:37:08.080 there isn't a single one of us

03:37:09.200 that isn't suffering

03:37:10.080 from some form of mental illness

03:37:12.600 right

03:37:12.980 even if we're functioning

03:37:14.480 there's something in there

03:37:15.600 that's 0.99

03:37:16.080 maybe fucking with you a little bit 0.99

03:37:18.560 and it's all about 1.00

03:37:20.340 how you deal with it

03:37:21.400 but yeah

03:37:21.820 like they don't want us being

03:37:23.200 healthy in our mind

03:37:24.240 no

03:37:25.440 degeneracy

03:37:29.740 yeah

03:37:31.160 they want

03:37:31.720 they want a big time

03:37:32.700 every

03:37:33.580 everything that we see

03:37:35.100 is

03:37:35.620 is devoted to

03:37:36.940 some form of

03:37:38.440 degeneracy

03:37:39.220 like

03:37:39.680 especially look

03:37:40.980 look at twitter

03:37:41.640 right

03:37:42.060 like jeremy mackenzie

03:37:43.180 can't have an account 0.99

03:37:44.120 but how many fucking 0.99

03:37:45.280 porn bot accounts 1.00

03:37:46.420 are there

03:37:46.840 yeah

03:37:47.700 right

03:37:48.480 like i i get follows

03:37:49.700 every once in a while

03:37:50.680 and i

03:37:51.800 i will actually

03:37:52.780 every time somebody

03:37:53.740 follows me

03:37:54.240 i take a look

03:37:54.940 i will look at that account

03:37:56.740 if it's a bot

03:37:57.380 i block them

03:37:58.100 exactly

03:37:58.860 same here

03:37:59.660 and one of the biggest

03:38:00.900 things i'll do

03:38:01.640 i'll go to the likes

03:38:03.860 and i'll check the likes

03:38:05.980 of said account

03:38:07.040 and that's another thing

03:38:09.340 that is an indicator

03:38:10.240 right

03:38:10.560 so like if you're liking 1.00

03:38:11.420 a bunch of fucking 1.00

03:38:12.080 porn accounts 1.00

03:38:12.860 you know 1.00

03:38:13.240 you can go fuck yourself 1.00

03:38:14.060 you're getting blocked 1.00

03:38:14.760 right

03:38:16.500 i i don't

03:38:17.300 i don't care for it

03:38:18.520 there's porn accounts

03:38:19.620 on twitter

03:38:20.120 oh there's tons

03:38:21.260 tons

03:38:22.220 you like 1.00

03:38:23.000 yeah some of the shit 0.99

03:38:24.880 that i've seen 0.99

03:38:25.400 like especially because

03:38:26.580 oh full on porn 0.55

03:38:27.780 it's really weird 0.97

03:38:28.900 like okay let's say

03:38:29.740 island jason follows me

03:38:31.020 someone has to show me

03:38:32.040 twitter

03:38:32.360 right

03:38:33.520 well let's pretend

03:38:34.660 for a moment

03:38:35.160 island jason wasn't

03:38:36.260 following me

03:38:36.860 and he just did now

03:38:38.020 i've i've found that

03:38:39.460 for every time

03:38:40.280 somebody real follows me

03:38:41.840 it's like all of a sudden

03:38:42.800 there'll be like

03:38:43.440 three or four

03:38:44.360 bot accounts

03:38:45.740 that also follow me

03:38:46.900 at the same time

03:38:47.720 and then it's like

03:38:49.700 i can go through them

03:38:50.540 and see

03:38:50.940 and like there's been

03:38:51.820 a few times

03:38:52.400 it's like yeah

03:38:53.000 they are straight up

03:38:53.720 porn accounts 1.00

03:38:54.260 and some of the shit 1.00

03:38:54.880 you see is pretty 1.00

03:38:55.560 fucking crazy 0.99

03:38:57.080 um 1.00

03:38:58.140 or instagram

03:38:59.420 as an example

03:39:00.200 last night

03:39:00.860 i was getting

03:39:01.660 a message 1.00

03:39:02.460 in my fucking 1.00

03:39:03.300 dms 1.00

03:39:03.920 and it's an obvious

03:39:06.060 obvious bot account

03:39:07.800 right

03:39:09.080 uh one thing i really

03:39:10.500 like doing though

03:39:11.140 is seeing if we have

03:39:11.860 any mutual friends

03:39:12.800 because that's always fun

03:39:13.780 um

03:39:14.840 and often we do

03:39:16.500 right

03:39:17.200 there's always somebody

03:39:18.120 there that i'm like 1.00

03:39:19.020 oh you lovable idiot 1.00

03:39:20.740 like 1.00

03:39:21.540 why did you believe

03:39:24.220 that this allegedly

03:39:25.260 smoking hot chick 1.00

03:39:26.380 had any interest

03:39:27.280 right

03:39:28.000 really

03:39:28.360 yeah like it's not

03:39:29.820 that's not the way

03:39:30.420 it works

03:39:30.960 those are obvious

03:39:31.940 bot accounts

03:39:32.560 that are just trying

03:39:33.220 to get your credit

03:39:33.780 card number

03:39:34.280 right

03:39:34.720 yeah 1.00

03:39:35.920 i got a fucking 0.99

03:39:37.980 uh shitty email 0.99

03:39:39.100 yesterday 1.00

03:39:39.580 and i fucking 0.97

03:39:41.120 almost fell for it 0.98

03:39:42.120 for a second

03:39:42.560 because i

03:39:43.000 so it said

03:39:44.220 let me find it here

03:39:45.320 oh it was from

03:39:47.320 the geek squad 0.99

03:39:48.280 oh i fucking 0.98

03:39:49.980 deleted it 0.98

03:39:50.540 wild skew

03:39:51.740 is taliban still

03:39:52.740 blue checked

03:39:53.320 on twitter

03:39:53.800 probably

03:39:55.400 anyways yeah

03:39:57.120 i got this 0.99

03:39:57.480 fucking thing 1.00

03:39:57.920 from the geek squad 1.00

03:39:58.840 saying that

03:39:59.700 they um

03:40:00.400 my account

03:40:02.300 was recovered

03:40:02.820 successfully 0.99

03:40:03.480 what the fuck 0.99

03:40:04.240 you gotta watch 1.00

03:40:05.740 your email now

03:40:06.300 because like

03:40:06.860 they're just

03:40:07.160 going hard 1.00

03:40:07.960 on shit 1.00

03:40:08.420 but anyways 1.00

03:40:09.160 it was

03:40:09.440 it was

03:40:09.780 279

03:40:11.120 oh you've

03:40:11.580 congratulations

03:40:12.360 we've automatically

03:40:13.620 renewed your subscription

03:40:14.640 your premium subscription

03:40:15.840 to geek squad

03:40:16.680 like i've never 0.99

03:40:17.820 fucking 0.97

03:40:18.200 i haven't even 0.99

03:40:19.280 i can't even think

03:40:20.900 of any time

03:40:21.400 i've ever even

03:40:21.840 had anything to do

03:40:22.560 with geek squad

03:40:23.280 and it was addressed

03:40:25.320 to my email address

03:40:26.380 so i'm like 0.99

03:40:26.980 oh fuck 0.99

03:40:27.600 so i checked my 1.00

03:40:28.240 credit card bill 0.99

03:40:28.880 there's no fucking 0.97

03:40:29.660 there's no charge 0.94

03:40:30.560 for it

03:40:30.960 thankfully

03:40:31.360 but it's not

03:40:33.020 it's it makes it

03:40:34.260 look like it's coming

03:40:35.120 from some corporate 1.00

03:40:36.260 fucking email account 1.00

03:40:37.300 but then you look 1.00

03:40:37.780 closely it's 0.99

03:40:38.600 raul fucking 0.98

03:40:39.720 chavez at gmail dot 0.99

03:40:41.400 you know

03:40:41.980 calm right

03:40:42.620 and you're like 1.00

03:40:42.980 yeah fucking 1.00

03:40:43.640 cocksuckers 1.00

03:40:44.800 and it's funny

03:40:46.060 because sometimes

03:40:46.900 sometimes

03:40:47.760 they're close

03:40:49.320 right

03:40:49.820 like last night

03:40:51.280 i got one

03:40:51.940 where you just

03:40:52.960 see the prefix

03:40:53.680 of the email

03:40:54.200 like you don't

03:40:54.740 see the whole

03:40:55.160 email address

03:40:55.800 right

03:40:56.100 you just

03:40:56.620 yeah well

03:40:56.920 last night

03:40:57.520 i got a phone

03:40:58.040 call

03:40:58.380 and the recorded

03:40:59.840 message starts off

03:41:00.900 talking about

03:41:01.440 how it's visa

03:41:02.100 and you know

03:41:04.140 some some charges

03:41:05.240 went through

03:41:05.720 on my card

03:41:06.460 and like

03:41:06.900 there's that

03:41:07.600 split second

03:41:08.780 where i'm like

03:41:10.040 hmm

03:41:10.540 because i do

03:41:11.200 have a visa

03:41:11.720 debit

03:41:12.040 right

03:41:12.660 yeah

03:41:13.220 i'm like

03:41:13.860 hmm

03:41:14.340 but then as

03:41:14.860 soon as

03:41:15.080 they mentioned

03:41:15.460 the amounts

03:41:16.020 i'm like

03:41:16.700 well that

03:41:17.100 wouldn't have

03:41:17.640 happened

03:41:18.000 because i

03:41:18.760 have a

03:41:19.120 visa

03:41:19.360 debit

03:41:19.760 and i

03:41:20.220 did not

03:41:20.580 have that

03:41:20.940 much money

03:41:21.440 in my

03:41:21.740 account

03:41:22.080 so 1.00

03:41:22.600 you fucked 1.00

03:41:23.540 up 1.00

03:41:23.680 yeah

03:41:24.020 yeah

03:41:24.420 or like

03:41:26.700 the guy

03:41:27.000 that i

03:41:27.280 answered

03:41:27.560 the call

03:41:27.960 on chris's

03:41:28.780 stream

03:41:29.040 yesterday

03:41:29.460 that was

03:41:29.860 actually

03:41:30.160 golden

03:41:30.600 if anybody

03:41:31.140 wants to

03:41:31.600 check that

03:41:32.060 out

03:41:32.240 it's at

03:41:32.580 the 27

03:41:33.400 minute

03:41:33.780 45 second

03:41:34.760 mark

03:41:35.120 amazing

03:41:36.640 that was

03:41:38.340 fun

03:41:38.680 somebody

03:41:38.960 called

03:41:39.220 me

03:41:39.380 up

03:41:39.540 with

03:41:39.780 some

03:41:40.400 sort

03:41:41.200 of

03:41:41.380 investment

03:41:41.800 opportunity

03:41:42.560 of course

03:41:43.980 i took

03:41:44.840 that call

03:41:45.300 live on air

03:41:46.020 and kind 1.00

03:41:46.320 of fucked 1.00

03:41:46.600 with him 1.00

03:41:46.860 a little

03:41:47.060 bit

03:41:47.260 that was

03:41:47.560 good

03:41:47.720 time

03:41:47.980 that's

03:41:48.820 fun

03:41:49.060 yeah

03:41:50.080 he was

03:41:50.860 like

03:41:51.060 all i

03:41:51.660 heard

03:41:51.840 was

03:41:52.040 investment

03:41:52.480 i'm

03:41:52.700 like

03:41:52.860 investment

03:41:53.420 i'm

03:41:53.700 like

03:41:53.840 son

03:41:54.220 have

03:41:54.400 you

03:41:54.540 seen

03:41:54.780 the

03:41:54.940 inflation

03:41:55.420 i was

03:41:56.520 like

03:41:56.660 how

03:41:56.800 about

03:41:56.920 i

03:41:57.060 start

03:41:57.320 i was

03:41:57.720 like

03:41:57.860 i'll

03:41:58.000 start

03:41:58.220 an

03:41:58.360 only

03:41:58.560 fans

03:41:58.900 account

03:41:59.220 and

03:41:59.340 if

03:41:59.440 anybody

03:41:59.720 wants

03:41:59.980 to

03:42:00.100 look

03:42:00.220 at

03:42:00.280 my 1.00

03:42:00.420 cock 1.00

03:42:00.660 and 0.98

03:42:00.760 balls 0.98

03:42:00.960 i'll 1.00

03:42:01.180 fucking 0.99

03:42:01.420 invest 1.00

03:42:01.740 with

03:42:01.940 you

03:42:02.020 how

03:42:02.160 about

03:42:02.300 that

03:42:02.560 and

03:42:03.880 he's

03:42:04.260 just

03:42:04.440 like

03:42:04.640 what

03:42:04.900 i was

03:42:05.440 like

03:42:05.560 do

03:42:05.700 you

03:42:05.820 want

03:42:05.980 to

03:42:06.080 see

03:42:06.240 them

03:42:06.400 i was

03:42:06.600 like

03:42:06.720 i can

03:42:07.020 send

03:42:07.260 them

03:42:07.360 to

03:42:07.500 you

03:42:07.840 see

03:42:09.340 here's

03:42:09.600 what

03:42:09.700 it

03:42:09.820 comes

03:42:10.020 from

03:42:10.220 amazon

03:42:10.640 but

03:42:12.020 the

03:42:12.240 actual

03:42:12.600 it's

03:42:13.000 prime

03:42:13.460 and so

03:42:13.920 it's

03:42:14.060 info

03:42:14.380 at

03:42:14.660 bedell

03:42:15.100 dot

03:42:15.420 ifmi

03:42:16.560 dot

03:42:16.920 ca

03:42:17.220 but

03:42:17.500 it

03:42:17.660 says

03:42:17.900 prime

03:42:18.680 it

03:42:18.860 says

03:42:19.000 your

03:42:19.160 membership

03:42:19.500 has

03:42:19.760 expired

03:42:20.220 dear

03:42:21.760 customer

03:42:22.100 we

03:42:22.340 tried

03:42:22.500 to

03:42:22.580 renew

03:42:22.760 your

03:42:22.900 subscription

03:42:23.380 at

03:42:23.600 the

03:42:23.680 end

03:42:23.760 of

03:42:23.860 the

03:42:23.940 billing

03:42:24.140 cycle

03:42:24.500 but

03:42:24.760 your

03:42:24.900 payment

03:42:25.200 has

03:42:25.400 failed

03:42:25.720 obviously

03:42:26.800 we'd

03:42:27.000 love

03:42:27.100 to

03:42:27.220 see

03:42:27.360 you

03:42:27.520 again

03:42:27.760 if

03:42:27.940 you

03:42:28.080 want

03:42:28.300 to

03:42:28.380 renew

03:42:28.560 your

03:42:28.720 subscription

03:42:29.100 click

03:42:29.400 the

03:42:29.580 link

03:42:29.720 below

03:42:30.060 right

03:42:30.920 well

03:42:31.120 my 1.00

03:42:31.480 fucking 1.00

03:42:31.760 mother 1.00

03:42:31.940 would

03:42:32.100 fall

03:42:32.280 for

03:42:32.440 that

03:42:32.600 in

03:42:32.720 30

03:42:32.960 seconds

03:42:33.280 oh

03:42:33.480 my

03:42:33.640 god

03:42:33.880 i don't

03:42:34.120 want

03:42:34.240 to

03:42:34.300 lose

03:42:34.480 my

03:42:34.640 prime

03:42:35.080 right

03:42:35.820 yeah

03:42:36.240 right

03:42:36.780 well

03:42:37.680 and that's

03:42:37.960 what they're

03:42:38.220 hoping

03:42:38.500 though

03:42:38.740 right

03:42:38.940 like

03:42:39.180 let's

03:42:39.800 face it

03:42:50.220 have

03:42:50.460 some

03:42:50.740 money

03:42:51.040 and

03:42:51.480 they've

03:42:51.680 got

03:42:51.840 guaranteed

03:42:52.260 incomes

03:42:52.760 and

03:42:53.540 that

03:42:53.700 they

03:42:53.860 are

03:42:53.960 much

03:42:54.220 easier

03:42:54.740 to

03:42:54.940 convince

03:42:55.560 of

03:42:56.660 things

03:42:57.180 especially

03:42:58.640 internet

03:42:59.160 things

03:42:59.880 right

03:43:00.520 because

03:43:00.960 that's

03:43:01.200 where

03:43:01.360 they're

03:43:01.580 lost

03:43:02.120 and

03:43:02.440 intimidated

03:43:03.040 and

03:43:04.020 you know

03:43:05.120 maybe

03:43:06.420 maybe not

03:43:07.180 they wouldn't

03:43:08.860 really ask

03:43:09.400 for the

03:43:09.660 help

03:43:09.840 they would

03:43:10.120 just

03:43:10.300 automatically

03:43:11.040 assume

03:43:11.800 that this

03:43:12.520 is a

03:43:12.820 trustworthy

03:43:13.160 link

03:43:13.740 and that

03:43:14.040 they should

03:43:14.360 just go

03:43:14.720 ahead

03:43:14.920 and do

03:43:15.240 this

03:43:15.620 well

03:43:16.620 i got

03:43:16.940 a call

03:43:17.240 from my

03:43:17.580 mother-in-law

03:43:17.980 one time

03:43:18.560 in the

03:43:19.700 middle

03:43:19.820 of the

03:43:20.000 day

03:43:20.240 she

03:43:20.600 never

03:43:20.860 calls

03:43:21.160 me

03:43:21.340 like

03:43:21.580 i mean

03:43:21.780 she

03:43:22.020 has

03:43:22.180 my

03:43:22.320 number

03:43:22.520 but

03:43:22.700 she

03:43:22.800 never

03:43:22.940 really

03:43:23.140 calls

03:43:23.360 me

03:43:23.480 and

03:43:23.580 she's

03:43:23.780 like

03:43:23.920 oh

03:43:24.240 uh

03:43:24.960 where's

03:43:25.380 alistair

03:43:25.820 that's

03:43:26.000 my son

03:43:26.400 and i'm

03:43:26.940 like

03:43:27.120 what do

03:43:28.080 you mean

03:43:28.340 she goes

03:43:28.700 have you

03:43:28.940 talked to

03:43:29.260 him

03:43:29.340 today

03:43:29.540 and i

03:43:29.740 said

03:43:29.880 no

03:43:30.160 and she's

03:43:31.400 somebody's

03:43:33.900 in my house

03:43:34.300 hold on

03:43:34.600 oh boy

03:43:36.000 this is where

03:43:38.080 you wish

03:43:38.360 you could

03:43:38.580 be mobile

03:43:39.080 yeah

03:43:40.160 all right

03:43:41.000 see

03:43:42.220 that's happened

03:43:43.980 to me

03:43:44.200 once on

03:43:44.580 stream

03:43:44.760 too

03:43:45.080 that scared 0.99

03:43:47.320 the shit

03:43:47.720 out of me

03:43:48.780 funny

03:43:49.280 because i

03:43:49.680 i thought

03:43:50.000 i thought

03:43:50.680 i was

03:43:51.040 i didn't

03:43:51.500 think anybody

03:43:52.000 was in

03:43:52.320 my apartment

03:43:52.860 either but

03:43:53.340 apparently he

03:43:53.840 came back

03:43:54.440 figured he was

03:43:56.920 out there

03:43:57.200 playing with

03:43:57.620 his buddies

03:43:57.980 it's all

03:43:58.420 nice and

03:43:58.800 so 0.99

03:43:58.940 the fucking 1.00

03:44:00.100 weather here 1.00

03:44:00.660 i tell you

03:44:01.560 okay

03:44:01.900 i know it's

03:44:02.580 sunny again

03:44:03.160 here too

03:44:03.660 and it was

03:44:04.060 just like

03:44:04.400 blizzarding

03:44:04.940 like

03:44:05.140 yeah right

03:44:05.760 like i

03:44:06.180 looked outside

03:44:06.920 it was a 1.00

03:44:07.260 goddamn 1.00

03:44:07.600 blizzard and 0.98

03:44:08.180 i'm like

03:44:08.460 oh my 1.00

03:44:08.820 fuck and 1.00

03:44:09.320 then as 1.00

03:44:09.600 soon as

03:44:09.840 i went to

03:44:10.200 go get

03:44:10.480 them from

03:44:10.740 school the

03:44:11.160 blizzard had

03:44:11.660 stopped and

03:44:12.540 now we're

03:44:12.820 back to being 0.98

03:44:13.300 fucking bright 0.98

03:44:13.840 and sunny 0.99

03:44:14.280 i know

03:44:14.940 but it's

03:44:16.500 excuse me

03:44:17.700 it's not

03:44:17.880 going to

03:44:18.040 last very

03:44:18.360 long i

03:44:18.660 know that

03:44:19.040 i tell

03:44:19.940 you

03:44:20.260 wild skews

03:44:22.920 all like

03:44:23.360 click click

03:44:23.920 you forgot

03:44:24.300 the boom

03:44:24.780 oh right

03:44:26.200 so click

03:44:26.860 click boom

03:44:27.420 oh there we

03:44:28.860 go there's

03:44:29.520 the intruder

03:44:30.020 right there

03:44:30.780 child

03:44:31.180 almost good

03:44:32.700 we saw the

03:44:33.460 intruder

03:44:34.500 oh 0.98

03:44:39.520 children

03:44:41.360 they are

03:44:42.180 fun though

03:44:42.600 i will say

03:44:43.140 that

03:44:43.420 here you

03:44:44.300 go

03:44:44.600 and actually

03:44:46.140 it's a it's

03:44:46.720 another thing

03:44:47.140 about the

03:44:47.600 uh the

03:44:49.020 irl stuff

03:44:49.840 too right

03:44:50.260 like uh

03:44:51.020 coming up

03:44:51.460 being able to

03:44:52.800 do things that

03:44:54.000 are more than

03:44:54.440 just a party

03:44:55.040 as well

03:44:55.440 yeah

03:44:56.380 that'll be

03:44:57.400 nice

03:44:57.820 yeah

03:44:58.800 absolutely

03:44:59.580 this weekend

03:45:00.740 this weekend

03:45:02.140 i'll be bringing

03:45:03.180 the midget 0.86

03:45:03.660 yeah

03:45:04.920 yeah why not

03:45:06.240 i figure

03:45:06.960 i'll use him

03:45:08.240 as my bowling

03:45:08.860 ball

03:45:09.160 that's fine

03:45:10.960 you know

03:45:11.700 yeah there's

03:45:12.860 lots of people

03:45:13.360 hey you can

03:45:14.000 slide down those 0.97

03:45:14.740 lanes pretty good

03:45:15.460 man they oil

03:45:16.180 them real nice

03:45:16.940 you know

03:45:18.020 yeah there you

03:45:19.320 go i haven't

03:45:20.640 thrown any kids

03:45:21.320 down there yet

03:45:21.920 but

03:45:22.180 oh throwing

03:45:23.040 kids is the

03:45:23.680 best

03:45:24.220 oh kick the 0.99

03:45:25.140 baby right 1.00

03:45:25.640 yes

03:45:26.520 i foiled the

03:45:29.500 intruder

03:45:29.960 it looked like 0.99

03:45:32.780 a midget 1.00

03:45:33.660 yeah he's a 0.84

03:45:34.780 midget 0.94

03:45:35.260 no i was out

03:45:37.580 with he was

03:45:38.020 out with my

03:45:38.420 stepdad and

03:45:39.080 just got home

03:45:39.800 so

03:45:40.060 see i'm trying

03:45:41.340 to figure out

03:45:41.860 what exactly to

03:45:42.820 refer to them

03:45:43.560 as i mean 0.91

03:45:44.160 there's semen 0.99

03:45:44.760 demon crotch 0.99

03:45:45.700 goblin 0.98

03:45:46.320 um 1.00

03:45:47.700 fuck trophies 1.00

03:45:49.200 failed abortion 1.00

03:45:50.300 yeah

03:45:51.200 right there's

03:45:52.160 all sorts

03:45:52.720 well i mean

03:45:54.480 failed abortion

03:45:55.100 that one seems

03:45:55.660 pretty specific

03:45:56.440 right

03:45:57.620 yeah

03:46:00.120 yeah

03:46:01.800 it

03:46:03.340 i like 1.00

03:46:04.180 fuck trophies 0.99

03:46:04.860 though 1.00

03:46:05.060 those are

03:46:05.440 right

03:46:06.540 well that's

03:46:08.300 what it is

03:46:08.920 right

03:46:09.320 it's at the

03:46:10.540 very least a

03:46:11.160 participation

03:46:11.640 trophy

03:46:12.260 yeah absolutely

03:46:13.120 i mean you

03:46:13.780 got a ribbon

03:46:14.360 for sure

03:46:15.180 yeah you got a

03:46:16.280 participation badge

03:46:17.360 absolutely

03:46:17.840 yeah

03:46:18.480 100%

03:46:19.160 it's just proof

03:46:19.900 it's like

03:46:20.500 look

03:46:20.780 look i once

03:46:22.280 got laid

03:46:22.860 it is a 1.00

03:46:25.200 fuck trophy 1.00

03:46:25.620 i get it 1.00

03:46:26.280 i actually

03:46:27.020 i wasn't always

03:46:28.320 an incel

03:46:28.860 actually to be

03:46:30.240 perfectly honest

03:46:30.980 i i would get 0.99

03:46:31.880 in shit for this 0.99

03:46:32.620 all the time 1.00

03:46:33.060 i kept telling

03:46:33.620 my kid's mom

03:46:34.540 uh when my son

03:46:35.620 was first born

03:46:36.300 i was like

03:46:37.280 i am going

03:46:38.200 to get him

03:46:38.920 a shirt

03:46:39.320 that says

03:46:41.080 i'm proof

03:46:41.720 my mom likes 1.00

03:46:42.440 to fuck 1.00

03:46:42.940 oh my god 1.00

03:46:44.340 yeah she 0.99

03:46:45.180 fucking hated 0.99

03:46:46.100 me for that 0.98

03:46:46.820 that is awesome

03:46:48.180 i like the 0.99

03:46:48.880 fucking 1.00

03:46:49.120 the little 1.00

03:46:50.160 sleeper i got

03:46:51.120 my daughter

03:46:51.800 when she was

03:46:52.220 younger

03:46:52.520 what did it

03:46:53.160 say it

03:46:53.620 said my mom

03:46:55.620 just wanted

03:46:56.060 to back rub

03:46:56.760 and something

03:46:57.600 like that

03:46:58.100 yeah right

03:46:59.600 right she

03:47:01.140 also got mad

03:47:01.660 at me because

03:47:02.060 i told her

03:47:02.520 that we would

03:47:03.000 get matching

03:47:03.480 mullets

03:47:03.960 um she was

03:47:06.180 not uh

03:47:07.080 you and the

03:47:08.940 kid are you

03:47:09.380 and the

03:47:09.600 yeah me

03:47:10.480 me and the

03:47:10.880 kid she

03:47:11.500 didn't

03:47:11.800 i thought

03:47:15.220 about it

03:47:15.780 i couldn't do

03:47:16.740 that to mine

03:47:17.260 because i

03:47:17.620 don't have

03:47:17.860 the hair he

03:47:18.320 has

03:47:18.620 yeah right

03:47:19.820 i'd have

03:47:20.900 to give

03:47:21.100 him a

03:47:21.260 cul-de-sac

03:47:21.760 that that's

03:47:22.520 actually one

03:47:22.940 thing i found

03:47:23.460 funny is with

03:47:24.020 my kid like

03:47:24.820 because when i

03:47:26.160 was in grade

03:47:27.220 nine that was

03:47:28.340 when i grew

03:47:28.760 my hair like

03:47:29.400 this is this

03:47:30.080 is the exact

03:47:30.940 look i had in

03:47:31.860 high school

03:47:32.340 right shocking

03:47:33.500 yeah right

03:47:35.160 it's right out

03:47:36.740 of my mouth

03:47:37.200 jason

03:47:37.600 but what i

03:47:39.140 find funny

03:47:40.000 though is is

03:47:40.800 without ever

03:47:41.500 knowing my

03:47:42.260 kid did the

03:47:42.800 exact same

03:47:43.280 thing

03:47:43.680 right like

03:47:45.840 it was never

03:47:46.900 really anything

03:47:47.900 that i ever

03:47:48.640 discussed like

03:47:49.340 i never really

03:47:49.960 told him i 0.99

03:47:50.400 fucking grew 0.99

03:47:50.840 my hair out 0.99

03:47:51.520 or anything

03:47:51.960 like that and

03:47:52.640 he's never

03:47:52.980 seen pictures

03:47:53.600 of me like

03:47:54.180 that way but

03:47:54.800 he just

03:47:55.220 naturally went

03:47:55.920 ahead and did

03:47:56.420 the exact same 1.00

03:47:57.060 fucking thing 0.99

03:47:57.640 it was like 0.99

03:47:58.460 right around

03:47:59.040 that time of

03:47:59.680 getting into

03:48:00.060 high school

03:48:00.540 he had his 1.00

03:48:01.120 long ass 0.97

03:48:01.640 hair it was 0.97

03:48:02.340 like looking

03:48:02.740 at myself

03:48:03.460 sometimes that

03:48:07.000 was a good

03:48:07.360 thing sometimes

03:48:08.020 i look at my

03:48:09.540 son's hands and

03:48:10.680 they're just

03:48:11.060 they're like

03:48:11.700 miniature versions of

03:48:12.660 mine you know

03:48:13.300 koala mama

03:48:16.460 neither of my

03:48:17.200 kids would get

03:48:17.840 a mullet when

03:48:18.360 i did

03:48:18.780 traitors

03:48:19.600 she's got a 0.79

03:48:22.080 little bit of

03:48:22.440 a mullet going 0.89

03:48:23.000 on

03:48:23.460 there you go

03:48:25.020 she was like

03:48:25.900 she asked me if

03:48:26.720 she looked

03:48:27.000 lesbian i was

03:48:27.640 like well maybe

03:48:28.100 half right

03:48:29.400 you're half 0.60

03:48:30.800 lesbian you'd 1.00

03:48:31.760 scissor with one 1.00

03:48:32.440 leg

03:48:32.720 right

03:48:34.900 there you go

03:48:36.180 that's a thing

03:48:37.180 isn't it

03:48:37.780 i don't i'm not

03:48:39.140 sure i'm not a

03:48:39.660 lesbian i like

03:48:40.220 derek

03:48:40.560 i don't know

03:48:41.380 i'm trans lesbian

03:48:43.180 though not all 0.98

03:48:44.600 the dicks one in 0.91

03:48:45.700 particular so 0.91

03:48:47.320 we're clear

03:48:47.800 not looking for

03:48:50.640 oh boy

03:48:53.220 um oh boy

03:48:54.980 all right

03:48:56.060 speaking of uh

03:48:57.760 i have to go and

03:48:59.060 run it out

03:49:00.420 i gotta it's my

03:49:01.680 gym time 0.52

03:49:02.300 oh so i have

03:49:05.500 to run it out

03:49:06.520 or rub it out

03:49:07.200 probably both

03:49:09.280 all this talk of

03:49:10.620 johnny's mullet

03:49:11.340 yeah no i'm gonna

03:49:13.000 go run it out

03:49:13.840 first and then

03:49:15.100 we'll see what

03:49:15.520 happens after that

03:49:16.640 you know it

03:49:17.560 depends on

03:49:18.160 i know i feel

03:49:19.620 but i think for

03:49:20.580 now i'm just

03:49:21.060 gonna go run it

03:49:21.720 out lift some

03:49:22.280 weights instead

03:49:23.060 all right

03:49:24.420 then good idea

03:49:25.260 sounds like a

03:49:26.420 plan

03:49:26.720 yeah my kids

03:49:28.040 so much should

03:49:28.420 probably give

03:49:28.980 them some

03:49:29.200 attention

03:49:29.600 yeah i was

03:49:30.280 gonna say we

03:49:30.660 might as well

03:49:30.980 wrap this up

03:49:31.640 i gotta

03:49:31.900 there you go

03:49:32.320 all right

03:49:32.680 let's wrap

03:49:33.200 her up

03:49:33.680 great time

03:49:35.160 absolutely

03:49:36.080 yeah thanks for

03:49:37.560 a fantastic

03:49:39.800 afternoon i

03:49:41.880 guess i mean

03:49:42.740 well i mean

03:49:44.820 it was great

03:49:45.680 conversation that's

03:49:46.780 for sure

03:49:47.160 um there's

03:49:49.320 really no

03:49:49.760 question there

03:49:50.320 no look

03:49:50.820 even my

03:49:51.300 light agrees

03:49:52.020 it's time to

03:49:54.080 go

03:49:54.420 that's right

03:49:55.240 yes thank

03:49:57.580 you for the

03:49:58.160 candid discussion

03:49:59.280 i uh i

03:50:00.440 appreciate both

03:50:02.040 of you for

03:50:02.540 being open

03:50:03.560 and honest

03:50:04.140 and and

03:50:04.960 being able

03:50:05.560 to have

03:50:06.780 some difficult

03:50:08.200 discussions

03:50:08.740 around some

03:50:09.560 difficult topics

03:50:10.500 and thank

03:50:11.740 you for

03:50:12.200 allowing me

03:50:13.040 to be able

03:50:13.940 to be a

03:50:14.660 part of those

03:50:15.160 discussions as

03:50:15.880 well

03:50:16.200 i appreciate

03:50:17.660 it

03:50:18.320 yeah absolutely

03:50:19.280 and uh

03:50:20.260 obviously love

03:50:20.960 everybody that

03:50:21.720 uh participated

03:50:22.760 in the chat

03:50:23.540 and of course

03:50:25.120 trad wife and

03:50:25.900 tom for coming

03:50:26.480 on as well

03:50:27.100 uh like it's

03:50:28.480 it is nice to

03:50:29.300 see that these

03:50:29.860 conversations happen

03:50:30.920 and that everybody

03:50:31.660 you know it

03:50:32.780 resonates with

03:50:33.460 people as well

03:50:34.060 three hours and

03:50:35.460 50 minutes to

03:50:36.200 be exact

03:50:36.740 east coast

03:50:37.340 canadian

03:50:37.660 yeah right

03:50:39.520 it's like nothing

03:50:40.620 long just seven

03:50:41.520 hours or so

03:50:42.340 yeah well we're

03:50:43.780 we're not doing a

03:50:44.540 chris stream

03:50:45.080 we're doing

03:50:45.720 half a chris stream

03:50:46.780 chris will probably

03:50:47.760 fire up a stream

03:50:48.560 right now

03:50:49.580 there you go

03:50:50.240 i wouldn't doubt

03:50:51.220 that i would not

03:50:51.980 doubt that

03:50:52.780 he's probably got

03:50:54.460 one running

03:50:54.840 wondering where 0.99

03:50:55.360 the fuck is 1.00

03:50:55.880 everybody 1.00

03:50:56.280 right oh my god

03:50:57.640 that's funny i

03:50:58.200 didn't even think

03:50:58.660 to look

03:50:59.040 all right i'm

03:51:00.080 gonna try this

03:51:00.560 wrap up and

03:51:01.240 leave i've never

03:51:01.940 hit that button

03:51:02.680 yet

03:51:02.960 that sounds

03:51:04.600 fun

03:51:05.020 and i

jonnyrawton - March 20, 2024

FAFO w⧸Jonny and Sarah - v4hu499

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