JustPearlyThings - April 23, 2023


Average Woman CLAIMS That She's Not Average


Episode Stats

Length

9 minutes

Words per Minute

224.92293

Word Count

2,116

Sentence Count

210

Misogynist Sentences

20

Hate Speech Sentences

9


Summary

In this episode, I talk about why I m not average compared to my peers and why you re not average either. I explain why it s not about being average, it s about what men are looking for in a woman.


Transcript

00:00:00.000 Like, why aren't they perfect?
00:00:01.500 It's like, it's not perfect,
00:00:02.660 but it's like everybody's saying,
00:00:03.660 I need to have it as average, as average.
00:00:05.640 Why? I ain't average.
00:00:07.060 I am not average.
00:00:08.560 I'm going to let you know right now.
00:00:09.700 Well, make sure you're not average.
00:00:11.000 Because if I look at my age mates,
00:00:13.280 my successes, my achievements,
00:00:15.340 my personality, my drive,
00:00:17.140 my motivation is unmatched.
00:00:19.600 Can I just say something for once?
00:00:21.980 Are you a single parent?
00:00:23.740 I am a single parent.
00:00:24.320 You're average. I'm average.
00:00:25.540 I'm average.
00:00:26.520 Can you ask me why I was a single parent?
00:00:29.600 No, can you ask me why I'm a single parent?
00:00:31.620 I'm a divorcee first.
00:00:33.020 I'm a divorcee from a...
00:00:34.640 I was a single parent.
00:00:36.280 But you assume why I'm a single parent.
00:00:37.980 You think I just woke up and I bred
00:00:40.020 and I'm a single mum.
00:00:41.300 That's not how it happened.
00:00:41.960 I did all that.
00:00:43.180 I did all that.
00:00:43.780 I had my child in wedlock.
00:00:45.980 I did all that.
00:00:46.460 It's just that because sometimes,
00:00:48.820 as a single parent,
00:00:49.560 because you've been in a relationship
00:00:50.580 and you've been there before,
00:00:51.900 you've got different expectations.
00:00:53.280 No, I'm saying I didn't start as a single parent.
00:00:55.440 I met my husband and I had a child.
00:00:57.360 Nobody meets as a single parent.
00:00:59.280 I really don't like the way you guys
00:01:00.840 assume things about single parents.
00:01:01.800 My man was a single parent.
00:01:03.700 I'm not just going against the women.
00:01:05.580 My man was a single parent too.
00:01:08.000 My man was also a single parent.
00:01:09.080 So does that make her average
00:01:10.160 because she's a single parent?
00:01:11.320 Guys, why is average an insult?
00:01:13.460 What is wrong with average?
00:01:14.880 I ain't here to be average.
00:01:16.640 Guys, guys, guys.
00:01:17.600 Can I add something to me?
00:01:19.340 There's how many people in here?
00:01:21.060 Wait, eight?
00:01:22.300 Most of us are average.
00:01:23.360 Most people are average.
00:01:24.700 Can I say something?
00:01:25.220 And when you talk about drive,
00:01:26.820 that's not things that men look for.
00:01:28.600 I'm not looking for what men look for.
00:01:29.780 I'm looking for what I'm looking for.
00:01:31.080 This is the problem.
00:01:31.640 Okay, so when you speak about average, right?
00:01:33.760 Because remember,
00:01:34.320 everything we speak about
00:01:35.180 needs to be within context.
00:01:36.320 Definitely.
00:01:36.500 Okay, so when you spoke,
00:01:37.800 you said compare to my peers, right?
00:01:39.420 Yeah, my age mate.
00:01:40.600 So maybe compared to your peers,
00:01:42.860 you may not be average.
00:01:43.940 That was my evidence of why I'm not average.
00:01:45.680 However, however,
00:01:46.540 if we go to another context, right?
00:01:48.700 And then we compare you to people like
00:01:51.160 Rihanna, Beyonce,
00:01:54.000 Who are one in nine billion.
00:01:55.940 Hang on, right?
00:01:57.580 Because you're not...
00:01:58.200 We can't compare.
00:01:59.380 One second, you can.
00:02:00.640 Because I'll tell you why.
00:02:02.000 Let me explain why, right?
00:02:03.280 When you meet a guy, right?
00:02:04.860 You can be very pretty.
00:02:06.180 You could be very attractive.
00:02:07.220 You could be like all of these things, right?
00:02:09.160 But he will still look at you as average
00:02:11.960 because if he can...
00:02:14.680 Look, there's always...
00:02:15.960 It depends what you compare the average with.
00:02:19.040 Okay, so like you said with your peers,
00:02:20.320 you can apply that to that.
00:02:21.540 But if you apply average on a larger scale,
00:02:24.060 okay, where people are millionaires,
00:02:25.900 people are mad famous,
00:02:27.600 millions of followers,
00:02:28.660 they all look at you as average
00:02:29.900 compared to that person.
00:02:31.360 Do you know what I'm trying to say?
00:02:32.160 But we're looking at percentages, though.
00:02:32.940 No, but we have to look overall
00:02:34.440 because you've got to remember,
00:02:35.640 people are being brainwashed out here.
00:02:37.120 They're looking at Rihanna.
00:02:38.300 They're looking at Beyonce.
00:02:39.500 They're looking at all of these people.
00:02:41.020 You know what the problem is with this?
00:02:41.260 The whole thing is...
00:02:42.340 One second, if you don't mind,
00:02:43.900 can I just finish what I was saying?
00:02:45.640 So that's the first thing I was going to say.
00:02:47.600 It's in context, right?
00:02:49.220 Who you're comparing yourself to
00:02:50.660 because nowadays,
00:02:52.400 guys are looking for girls,
00:02:53.580 the majority of guys,
00:02:54.520 because look,
00:02:55.080 I'm a woman, right?
00:02:56.480 But all my life,
00:02:57.600 I'm road.
00:02:58.680 I'm hood.
00:02:59.260 All my friends are savages.
00:03:01.040 They're all road men.
00:03:02.020 I don't chill with girls.
00:03:03.400 I've got one female that's my friend.
00:03:04.800 All my friends are males,
00:03:06.460 so I hear them when they speak.
00:03:07.900 This younger generation,
00:03:09.000 a lot of them are actually looking for girls
00:03:10.600 with money.
00:03:11.580 That's what they want.
00:03:12.140 Girls with money,
00:03:13.020 girls with cars,
00:03:14.000 girls with...
00:03:14.580 That's how they're thinking now.
00:03:16.460 Their thinking is completely different.
00:03:17.800 So a normal basic nine to five working person
00:03:20.460 or working class or whatever,
00:03:22.900 it's average to them.
00:03:24.120 It's average
00:03:24.620 because they're seeing these things every day.
00:03:26.680 So that's the first point I wanted to make, right?
00:03:28.700 The second point I wanted to make is
00:03:29.860 people are like,
00:03:30.760 oh, you know,
00:03:31.180 the man should be in control.
00:03:32.580 The man's...
00:03:33.500 You have to listen to the man
00:03:35.100 and the man's got the power.
00:03:36.040 But really and truly, right,
00:03:37.300 if you're married, right,
00:03:38.400 or you're in a serious relationship with a man,
00:03:40.480 you're the one that's in control.
00:03:42.120 You're the one that's in power.
00:03:43.140 And I'll tell you why.
00:03:43.740 Because when your husband respects you, right,
00:03:46.540 he'll do anything for you.
00:03:47.920 You ring him and say to him,
00:03:48.760 look, I need milk.
00:03:49.500 He's dropping everything
00:03:50.260 and he's coming.
00:03:50.820 He's bringing milk.
00:03:51.620 If you ring him and say to him,
00:03:52.620 I need this,
00:03:53.100 or something's happened,
00:03:54.040 or he's coming.
00:03:54.880 He's coming running straight for you.
00:03:56.060 So really,
00:03:56.740 you're actually in control.
00:03:58.340 As long as there's respect there,
00:04:00.300 right,
00:04:00.540 and there's the love there
00:04:01.400 and you're playing your role
00:04:02.300 and he's playing his role.
00:04:03.800 They say that a woman
00:04:05.140 is the neck to a man's head.
00:04:07.100 So you can turn his head
00:04:08.660 whichever way you want to turn his head.
00:04:10.460 You just got to know how to.
00:04:12.020 What were you going to say?
00:04:13.060 You want to say something?
00:04:13.640 I really hate how
00:04:15.240 being a single mother
00:04:16.460 diminishes your value as a human being.
00:04:19.320 How you can go from a 10
00:04:21.600 suddenly everyone's like,
00:04:22.600 oh, now you're a five
00:04:23.320 because you're a single mother.
00:04:23.980 That says nothing about
00:04:25.000 who you are as a person.
00:04:26.180 That says nothing about your mastery,
00:04:27.520 about your talent,
00:04:28.480 about the discipline
00:04:29.100 that it takes to get you there.
00:04:30.120 But now because somebody,
00:04:31.240 because somebody now has disrespected,
00:04:33.900 now something has happened
00:04:35.240 in her life.
00:04:35.740 That don't matter, bro.
00:04:36.260 That's such a shallow way
00:04:38.920 to look at life.
00:04:39.580 Listen, at the end of the day,
00:04:41.460 at the end of the day,
00:04:42.720 you have to just respect
00:04:44.560 what the market wants.
00:04:45.860 What?
00:04:46.360 At the end of the day.
00:04:47.020 Do you know how much man
00:04:47.620 want a single mom?
00:04:48.360 Let me just finish my,
00:04:49.480 because I'll let you lot talk.
00:04:51.060 Do your thing.
00:04:51.480 I will do my thing.
00:04:53.500 Yeah.
00:04:53.820 At the end of the day,
00:04:54.820 if you don't care
00:04:55.720 what the market wants
00:04:56.820 and you talk
00:04:57.700 and you tell yourself,
00:04:58.700 oh, I'm not average.
00:04:59.540 I'm not average, bro.
00:05:00.480 Like you're just going
00:05:01.100 to continue losing, bruv.
00:05:02.780 You should maybe
00:05:03.680 understand the market.
00:05:04.940 Guess what?
00:05:05.300 Coca-Cola understands its market.
00:05:07.140 That's why Coca-Cola
00:05:08.620 is successful, bruv.
00:05:10.400 So you can be deluded
00:05:12.340 and think I'm a 10
00:05:13.560 and this because I've got money
00:05:15.400 and I went to this school
00:05:16.800 and blah, blah, blah.
00:05:18.040 Like, bro,
00:05:18.940 I do these podcasts,
00:05:19.900 the same thing
00:05:20.640 and these women come
00:05:21.940 and say the same thing
00:05:22.760 because I went to this school
00:05:23.760 and I've got money,
00:05:24.760 but the market does not care
00:05:26.220 about that.
00:05:27.120 And I'm sorry to say,
00:05:28.800 I'm sorry to say,
00:05:29.920 like you're saying,
00:05:30.700 oh, but, you know,
00:05:31.820 a single mother diminishing
00:05:33.060 who you are as a person.
00:05:34.140 No, you could be a great person
00:05:35.340 and be a single mother.
00:05:36.080 You can be an excellent person,
00:05:37.180 but at the end of the day,
00:05:38.460 the market,
00:05:39.340 for the most part,
00:05:40.160 is not going to want to couple.
00:05:41.540 So what market?
00:05:42.560 It depends.
00:05:43.420 What do you mean the market?
00:05:44.480 Men is the market.
00:05:46.420 What's the market?
00:05:46.940 You're not my market.
00:05:48.840 The man in his 40s.
00:05:50.080 Men, I said men.
00:05:50.980 He's not my market.
00:05:51.480 I said men.
00:05:52.300 I said men.
00:05:53.220 Guys, one conversation.
00:05:55.040 Thank you.
00:05:55.480 And it says something about,
00:05:56.500 it says something about
00:05:57.260 your decision making
00:05:58.240 if you become a single mother.
00:06:00.740 Are you all right?
00:06:01.880 Do you know what?
00:06:02.460 Do you know why I became
00:06:03.600 a single mother?
00:06:04.260 I have to disagree.
00:06:04.980 That's uncool for.
00:06:07.320 You don't know what I experienced.
00:06:08.680 You don't know what I experienced
00:06:09.560 as a married woman
00:06:10.500 to make a choice
00:06:11.720 to be a single mother.
00:06:12.620 So I must take.
00:06:13.920 It's either you don't pick
00:06:15.100 the right guys.
00:06:16.180 It's something about
00:06:17.880 your decision making.
00:06:18.920 Maybe you don't pick
00:06:19.600 the right guys.
00:06:20.440 So abusive women
00:06:21.180 that choose lovely,
00:06:22.940 amazing men
00:06:23.480 that just decide
00:06:24.660 to be physically abusive
00:06:26.400 because I chose that.
00:06:28.260 Yeah.
00:06:28.700 Is that what you're saying?
00:06:29.780 Say that again.
00:06:30.160 So I chose to be
00:06:31.040 a single divorcee
00:06:32.400 because of an individual's choice
00:06:35.340 to be violent.
00:06:36.320 Is that what you're saying?
00:06:36.980 It was your choice
00:06:37.460 to get in a relationship
00:06:38.440 with him.
00:06:38.940 Oh, because I didn't want
00:06:39.980 to see his psyche.
00:06:40.640 It's like life turns out
00:06:42.600 better if you take
00:06:43.220 accountability for your choices.
00:06:44.860 Sometimes.
00:06:45.960 Okay.
00:06:46.460 I disagree.
00:06:48.280 The abusive man
00:06:50.640 made her the single mother.
00:06:52.260 So why is the
00:06:52.960 accountability for him?
00:06:53.680 An abusive man.
00:06:55.340 He's wrong.
00:06:56.260 I agree with you.
00:06:57.400 But where do we take
00:06:58.400 accountability for the fact
00:07:00.900 that you pick the man?
00:07:02.580 People change, Pearl.
00:07:03.140 People change.
00:07:04.360 Sorry, Pearl.
00:07:04.940 Can I just,
00:07:05.480 I have to say
00:07:05.980 I disagree with you there.
00:07:07.580 I definitely disagree
00:07:08.860 with you there
00:07:09.200 and I'll tell you why.
00:07:09.860 Look, I'm 38.
00:07:10.740 I'm not a young girl.
00:07:11.460 I've been married
00:07:11.780 and I've been divorced.
00:07:12.660 I've got experience.
00:07:13.580 I've had a kid.
00:07:14.520 You know, I've been there.
00:07:15.460 I've done that.
00:07:15.760 So if somebody gets married
00:07:17.320 at a young age, right,
00:07:18.280 they're young.
00:07:20.460 Right?
00:07:20.760 So they're not that clued.
00:07:22.360 Right, look,
00:07:22.760 let me start from the,
00:07:23.500 look,
00:07:24.080 we always talk about a problem
00:07:25.340 but we never ever get
00:07:26.220 to the core of why
00:07:27.000 that problem occurs.
00:07:28.280 But everybody's young.
00:07:29.160 Everyone's young.
00:07:29.560 No, no, no, wait.
00:07:30.100 As a young girl,
00:07:30.920 I'm sure you'll all
00:07:31.800 agree with me, okay?
00:07:32.940 As a young girl,
00:07:34.100 we are brainwashed.
00:07:35.760 We are sold a fairy tale, right?
00:07:37.560 We are all thinking,
00:07:38.340 oh, we're going to wear
00:07:38.840 this white dress
00:07:39.480 and we're going to get married
00:07:40.140 and we're going to be in love.
00:07:41.320 No, we shouldn't have
00:07:42.580 been taught that.
00:07:43.400 We should have been taught
00:07:44.100 the realness.
00:07:44.940 Marriage is very hard.
00:07:46.100 It's a struggle.
00:07:47.020 You've got to make sure
00:07:47.560 you know who you're marrying.
00:07:48.340 Look, and also,
00:07:49.220 people change over time.
00:07:51.000 Somebody, you can marry them
00:07:52.020 and when you married them,
00:07:52.800 they were okay
00:07:53.300 and over time, gradually,
00:07:54.640 they got mental breakdown.
00:07:55.820 They became a psychopath.
00:07:57.280 They became antisocial.
00:07:59.620 But again,
00:07:59.960 we all grew up
00:08:00.620 in the same society
00:08:01.460 and people have different outcomes
00:08:02.600 based on their choices.
00:08:03.720 So if you make a choice...
00:08:04.700 Sorry, can I finish
00:08:05.360 what I was saying?
00:08:06.080 I think what you're saying,
00:08:07.460 everything that we say
00:08:08.300 has to be within context.
00:08:09.780 You know,
00:08:09.980 some people might get married
00:08:10.840 and their husband dies
00:08:11.560 and they become a single mother.
00:08:13.600 You know, there's...
00:08:14.380 Right, but we're not
00:08:14.640 talking about exceptions.
00:08:15.560 We're talking about the rule.
00:08:16.680 Are the majority
00:08:17.200 of single mothers widows?
00:08:18.460 No.
00:08:19.180 But does it go the other way?
00:08:20.340 No.
00:08:20.600 Does men's value diminish
00:08:22.340 when they become...
00:08:23.620 No, it doesn't.
00:08:25.000 No, because they can just get up
00:08:26.480 and they can go
00:08:27.100 and remarry.
00:08:27.940 Personally, for me personally,
00:08:30.200 I don't...
00:08:30.600 I'm not into the guys with kids.
00:08:32.000 That's not my thing.
00:08:32.720 But in general, no.
00:08:33.740 I mean, most guys I know
00:08:34.620 that have kids say
00:08:35.320 it helps them in dating.
00:08:36.380 Girls like it.
00:08:38.160 Yeah, no.
00:08:38.780 A guy can just get up
00:08:39.540 and start all over again.
00:08:40.500 He can literally...
00:08:41.100 So there's not a talk about
00:08:41.880 accountability when it comes to men,
00:08:43.400 but as soon as...
00:08:43.880 It's not about accountability,
00:08:45.200 it's about outcomes.
00:08:46.440 Like, what outcomes do you get?
00:08:47.600 What is the outcome?
00:08:48.100 And the outcome is
00:08:49.320 that single mothers
00:08:50.020 have a harder time
00:08:50.740 in dating than single women.
00:08:51.820 And the outcome for men
00:08:55.100 is oftentimes when men...
00:08:56.340 Not always,
00:08:57.080 but oftentimes when men have kids,
00:08:58.960 their outcomes are better.
00:09:00.360 They get more girls
00:09:01.000 because women like to see...
00:09:02.420 Women like to see a guy
00:09:03.640 that can take care of a kid.
00:09:04.880 It signals to us that like,
00:09:06.640 you know, again,
00:09:07.160 it's not my thing.
00:09:07.860 As many of you know,
00:09:09.320 I was just banned on TikTok
00:09:11.380 and we are demonetized
00:09:13.100 on a daily basis
00:09:14.340 on this platform.
00:09:16.160 If you want to help,
00:09:17.640 please consider sending
00:09:18.760 a super thanks below.
00:09:20.720 Every donation helps
00:09:22.000 and it helps make
00:09:22.840 what we do possible.