JustPearlyThings - April 26, 2023


Blue Pilled Man Gets In His Feelings


Episode Stats


Length

10 minutes

Words per minute

224.62756

Word count

2,307

Sentence count

221

Harmful content

Misogyny

9

sentences flagged

Toxicity

9

sentences flagged

Hate speech

6

sentences flagged


Summary

Summaries generated with gmurro/bart-large-finetuned-filtered-spotify-podcast-summ .

In this episode, we talk about the importance of a solid foundation in a family and the impact of a single parent home on a child s life. We also talk about why single mother homes are worse than single father homes.

Transcript

Transcript generated with Whisper (turbo).
Misogyny classifications generated with MilaNLProc/bert-base-uncased-ear-misogyny .
Toxicity classifications generated with s-nlp/roberta_toxicity_classifier .
Hate speech classifications generated with facebook/roberta-hate-speech-dynabench-r4-target .
00:00:00.000 The woman is the core. 0.70
00:00:02.200 I feel like the woman's the core to the family.
00:00:04.200 And that's real.
00:00:05.120 The only reason why I say that is because when the woman goes, 1.00
00:00:09.880 like nine times out of ten, I mean, I've witnessed it myself.
00:00:13.740 The family bond is gone.
00:00:16.800 It's, you know, disappeared or it's, you know, scattered.
00:00:20.740 You know, the woman holds.
00:00:22.040 The woman is the home, I feel. 0.94
00:00:24.260 The home, the foundation, the family, the, you know, the, you know.
00:00:28.920 Do you know what I'm saying?
00:00:30.620 Everybody has different opinions.
00:00:32.180 But I wouldn't say that it's always the woman's fault.
00:00:34.520 Do you know what I'm saying?
00:00:35.080 I personally think that's equal.
00:00:38.540 Say it again?
00:00:39.060 I personally think that's equal.
00:00:40.560 As in the man also is.
00:00:42.420 Yeah, of course.
00:00:43.240 But in a way, who takes care of the kids more, you know, in a way.
00:00:48.940 It's a different way.
00:00:50.060 There's a different way of how.
00:00:51.300 Your mom, for example, takes care of you differently how your dad does.
00:00:55.400 And you see your mom and you, you know, you love both your parents,
00:00:57.960 but you love your mom and your dad differently in a way.
00:01:00.420 Not in a way you love your mom more than your dad or whatever,
00:01:03.120 but there's a different comfort.
00:01:04.700 But that's good.
00:01:05.100 Do you know what I'm saying?
00:01:05.460 Because good parts, you plead their part.
00:01:06.640 Of course, but at the same time.
00:01:08.720 There's research to show, like, the primary,
00:01:10.700 if there's a break in the attachment with the primary caregiver,
00:01:13.360 which can be a mom or a dad, but usually it is a mom,
00:01:17.000 that can affect life chances for the rest of your life.
00:01:22.100 So you're more likely to go to prison.
00:01:23.440 You're less likely to do well at school.
00:01:24.560 Isn't that the dad?
00:01:25.820 No, it's either.
00:01:27.220 So also it could be both.
00:01:29.260 A primary attachment figure.
00:01:31.000 And also that doesn't have to just be you don't see them for a couple of months.
00:01:33.520 That can be their unpredictable.
00:01:34.700 That can be their suffering from mental health issues.
00:01:36.600 That isn't a break in an attachment.
00:01:38.140 I will say single father homes have better outcomes than single mother homes. 0.99
00:01:43.560 Statistically.
00:01:44.380 Yeah.
00:01:45.160 So hold on.
00:01:45.680 Say that again. 0.71
00:01:46.280 Interesting.
00:01:46.620 Single father homes have better outcomes than single mother homes. 0.90
00:01:49.040 But then that's when I disagree.
00:01:50.760 No, it's not like a disagreement.
00:01:52.540 Like the single mother home kids, like, go to jail more. 0.99
00:01:55.180 They fail out of school more.
00:01:55.760 I thought that was the, I thought that, oh, okay, okay.
00:01:59.240 Single mothers. 0.99
00:02:00.180 I thought you meant, okay, okay.
00:02:01.220 The kids are with a single mom.
00:02:02.700 Okay, yeah, yeah.
00:02:03.380 They go to jail more, fail out of school.
00:02:04.820 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:02:05.340 With a single dad, they fail out of school less.
00:02:07.600 I mean, it's still not great.
00:02:09.520 You know, we would like them together.
00:02:12.080 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:02:12.540 Of course.
00:02:13.160 Yeah.
00:02:13.380 I'm going to read super chats for a second and then blessing.
00:02:16.360 We're going to react to one more thing. 0.99
00:02:18.620 You know, just talk about this crap. 0.99
00:02:20.560 So glad we all get one more thing about being weak. 1.00
00:02:24.200 That's very unfair because people are suffering mental health issues.
00:02:27.220 They have to fight battles every single day that people don't understand.
00:02:30.180 They're stronger in a lot of ways.
00:02:31.680 Yeah.
00:02:31.860 Checking on your friends.
00:02:33.340 Yeah. 0.98
00:02:33.700 Nasty. 0.99
00:02:34.020 Um, I think there's real mental health and there's fake mental health. 0.98
00:02:39.000 I'd probably agree with that.
00:02:41.540 We can't be the ones judging that though.
00:02:43.700 You just got to look at it as, you know.
00:02:45.240 I will judge it, yeah.
00:02:46.720 I couldn't judge it because you don't really know.
00:02:50.960 You know what I'm saying?
00:02:51.600 You can't. 0.99
00:02:52.080 I think, I think that, you know, you kind of do know which friends are kind of just being dramatic and which friends are actually going through shit. 0.96
00:02:59.600 Right, but then, but then this is why a lot of people that do suffer of it turn to the people like you or us or whoever that think, oh, you're just faking it. 0.97
00:03:08.220 Oh, this is an excuse.
00:03:09.320 This is why encourage, it doesn't help them in a way where they're going through something.
00:03:14.560 They want to go to the closest people that they have.
00:03:17.000 But you're like, oh, it's not that deep though, is it?
00:03:19.700 Like, you can't think like that.
00:03:21.060 You've got to think, you know, more time, I get help from people that I don't know.
00:03:24.600 I get help from strangers that I don't know.
00:03:26.940 Because people that don't know me from the past, they'll look at my situation right now and be like, you know what?
00:03:32.480 Let me help you get through that.
00:03:33.720 Whereas the people that I know will look at, oh, well, I know how you like, how you like and what you've been like.
00:03:38.400 I don't really believe that because the traits or the characteristics that I've led them to think that, oh, I'm faking it.
00:03:45.120 Whereas we should look at the moment.
00:03:47.200 Why do you think like that?
00:03:48.580 Not be like, oh, you know, get over it.
00:03:51.320 You know what I'm saying?
00:03:52.620 I don't get why would they think you're faking it?
00:03:55.020 Because they're looking at, because exactly, because they're looking at how you are.
00:03:59.660 So they may point out little things that they think, oh, you're maybe too gullible or maybe you're too sensitive or you're being dramatic or whatever.
00:04:07.140 But what did you go through to make you aggressive as well?
00:04:08.660 But that doesn't matter though.
00:04:09.780 That shouldn't matter.
00:04:10.860 Right now, I feel like this.
00:04:12.900 Right now, I'm happy.
00:04:13.800 Right now, I'm upset.
00:04:14.440 Do you think your emotions, why should your, you shouldn't let your emotions control you though?
00:04:18.460 No, but at the same time, at the same time we're human and that's part of being a being.
00:04:24.880 You know what I'm saying?
00:04:25.580 Some people have seen role models, their parents that can manage emotions.
00:04:28.980 Some people haven't been beaten up or belittled.
00:04:32.620 Okay, okay.
00:04:33.460 Let me just.
00:04:33.960 So they can manage their emotions much easier.
00:04:35.820 Shouldn't the goal.
00:04:36.120 They're not a fair playing field.
00:04:37.180 Okay, okay.
00:04:37.760 We could say, but, all right.
00:04:38.740 But wherever we're starting, we could start here.
00:04:40.740 We start here.
00:04:41.440 Shouldn't the goal be to manage our emotions?
00:04:43.300 A hundred percent, but that's why people should go to therapy and they should admit it.
00:04:46.920 But I'm saying like, like if everyone in your life is telling you you're dramatic, you don't think maybe you're dramatic?
00:04:52.900 Not really.
00:04:53.700 Because like I said, if you're reaching out to somebody.
00:04:55.920 Anything could be a therapy.
00:04:57.140 It doesn't have to be a therapist.
00:04:58.240 Yeah, so, but like I'm saying, if you're reaching out to somebody, you're having the, like, probably one percent confidence to think, oh, let me tell somebody how I feel.
00:05:06.660 You might be embarrassed.
00:05:07.640 You might feel, you know, that much trauma that you don't want to, you don't want to open up.
00:05:12.360 Like, a lot of men don't speak about certain things.
00:05:14.520 Do you know what I'm saying?
00:05:15.200 Why is there more men that kill themselves, yeah, than women do? 0.98
00:05:18.800 Because a lot of men keep it in their head.
00:05:20.460 And I've been that man.
00:05:22.840 I've been that man.
00:05:24.120 I've been that man.
00:05:25.280 So for me, it's like, okay, I'm going to tell you how I feel, but you're going to be like, oh, be a man.
00:05:30.160 Be a man about it.
00:05:31.380 Do you know what I'm saying?
00:05:32.480 Like, you're brushing it.
00:05:33.440 You're brushing it because you're in a better place than I am.
00:05:36.640 So I should be in at your level.
00:05:37.820 But you're not at my level.
00:05:39.100 So respect that man, respect my perception or how I view things.
00:05:43.040 Because I view life and I walk life completely different to how you do.
00:05:46.940 Exactly.
00:05:47.380 Do you get it?
00:05:48.080 So I can't judge somebody and be like, oh, you know, your problems ain't greater than mine.
00:05:54.160 Everybody's problems are greater than, you know, nobody's problem is greater than anybody else's.
00:05:59.160 Do you know what I'm saying?
00:05:59.640 My whole point is we should be looking to, like, solve the problem.
00:06:02.880 Exactly.
00:06:03.380 But we're brushing it off like it's not a problem to be solved.
00:06:06.440 Therapy and medication and mindfulness and all these things that we guided towards.
00:06:10.540 There is evidence.
00:06:11.220 No, there is evidence.
00:06:12.340 There is statistics that do show that it works, especially if you combine them.
00:06:16.140 I meant, like, when I last looked at statistics, which was a while ago, for example, therapy gave you a 30% of chance of getting better.
00:06:23.480 Medication gave you a 30% chance of getting better.
00:06:25.620 Together, they gave you a 60% chance.
00:06:27.180 So there is evidence, otherwise they wouldn't.
00:06:30.000 Yeah.
00:06:30.500 A lot of these studies.
00:06:31.400 Does meds really get you better, though?
00:06:32.720 No, here's the problem.
00:06:34.140 A lot of these studies are funded by these, like, feminists. 1.00
00:06:38.240 Yeah.
00:06:38.540 It's like these women in the gender studies program. 1.00
00:06:42.680 Yeah.
00:06:43.320 I just.
00:06:43.920 About what men feeling more than women, like.
00:06:47.340 Yeah, they're not.
00:06:48.240 No, I think the meds.
00:06:49.660 That's the only thing I disagree with.
00:06:51.080 Can I be real?
00:06:51.640 I think it's kind of equal.
00:06:53.220 I think women do suffer with a lot of trauma and mental health as well.
00:06:56.560 Yeah.
00:06:56.660 You've got to look at it as well.
00:06:57.700 I believe that.
00:06:57.800 Because, you know, like you said, look, a single mother with a lot of kids that's been cheated on or left by the husband or whatever. 1.00
00:07:04.340 What is our definition?
00:07:05.520 Women's.
00:07:06.020 Oh, yeah.
00:07:06.360 But women's trauma comes from choices. 1.00
00:07:08.700 Yeah.
00:07:08.840 But so does men, though.
00:07:10.040 Everybody goes through life by choices.
00:07:12.060 We all live with free will.
00:07:13.280 Because we're not, we didn't choose the family situation that we're born into.
00:07:17.300 So it's definitely not by choice.
00:07:17.980 I just think this is like the victim Olympics.
00:07:20.220 It's like, it's like victim, victim.
00:07:21.980 Like, I just feel like it's a mentality.
00:07:23.520 Do you know?
00:07:24.140 Not everyone's born of a silver spoon.
00:07:25.780 Yeah.
00:07:26.180 Do you know what I'm saying?
00:07:26.660 Let's be real.
00:07:27.620 Now, some people are born without all of these opportunities that some people do.
00:07:31.600 Do you know what I'm saying?
00:07:32.120 And I know people born with zero opportunities that made something out of them.
00:07:36.140 That didn't look at themselves as a victim.
00:07:38.500 That doesn't mean they didn't have mental health.
00:07:39.880 That might be the insecurity and trauma that drove them to prove themselves.
00:07:43.500 They might not actually be happy.
00:07:44.700 If you keep it all in, it actually leads to, there's evidence that it leads to more physical health issues as well.
00:07:49.700 And also, wait, what I was going to say about people.
00:07:52.120 Oh, yeah.
00:07:52.560 I know a lot of people, especially old people, even relatives, the ones that are in denial and can't admit it because of their shame, they just spiral down a lot of the time.
00:08:01.420 They end up in suicide or just very severe mental health issues.
00:08:05.640 You want to do it like, sorry.
00:08:06.920 No, I was going to say, at the end of the day, I think we do know that at the end of this conversation is that each and every person can improve.
00:08:16.560 100%.
00:08:16.920 Now, how to improve is what they need to be aware of.
00:08:20.420 Mm-hmm.
00:08:21.440 And as long as you bring that awareness to them, then they have a choice to get better.
00:08:26.860 Yeah.
00:08:27.580 For sure.
00:08:28.120 And also, just because you have a problem doesn't necessarily mean you're making yourself a victim.
00:08:32.340 You're not labelling yourself as a victim.
00:08:33.940 It's other people that are saying that you are saying you're a victim.
00:08:36.960 I think that you are if you're constantly talking about your problem.
00:08:40.400 But then if you're leading with it and if every time someone, like, if you're always bringing up your problem again and again and again.
00:08:46.260 This is why I wanted to bring up the topic of social media because that's where people put their problems.
00:08:50.120 But not necessarily because if you're constantly bringing your problems, maybe listen, maybe sit down and be like, okay, what is the root of your problem?
00:08:59.140 Maybe he's crying out for help.
00:09:00.600 And then guess what?
00:09:01.700 That same person may have killed himself.
00:09:03.380 You'd be like, I wish I listened.
00:09:06.440 Oh, I wish I was there for that person.
00:09:08.320 You know, people want to give you the flowers when you're dead and buried, but they don't want to give you the flowers when you're alive.
00:09:12.220 And I just feel like people are really like, you know, delusional in a sense where they don't listen to the people that are suffering.
00:09:18.600 I'm talking about this from like an individualistic point of view.
00:09:21.480 So it's like if you have a problem and it's like if you're constantly talking about your problem and talking about your problem, it's not going to make it better.
00:09:29.080 It's a solution.
00:09:29.720 And I'm not saying you can't talk to anyone about your problem ever.
00:09:33.280 But this idea like you want to go to everyone, talk about your problem forever, talk about your problem, do a therapist.
00:09:37.640 Is it going to fix it?
00:09:38.460 No, they need to take active steps, which is therapy, which is meditation, which is sometimes medication, whether you agree with it or not.
00:09:44.600 There's lots of different things.
00:09:45.880 Obviously, they should improve.
00:09:47.000 I don't I don't really think it's great if someone just sits in it and doesn't do any of the steps.
00:09:52.520 But the problem is if they listen to some things that you say, pal, they won't even start that process.
00:09:57.940 And that's the issue with.
00:10:00.040 As many of you know, I was just banned on TikTok and we are demonetized on a daily basis on this platform.
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